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#maybe next year I’ll get around to drawing this comic…….someday……………
brother-emperors · 9 months
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Every time you draw Crassus smiling it makes me want to eat the nearest drywall but like in a really good way
thank you, every time I read about him laughing or making a joke, I also want to eat drywall
here’s another one of him smiling from the vault of really old rough drafts for comics I will draw Someday™️
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celestialscribbler · 2 years
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I posted 1,117 times in 2022
That's 1,115 more posts than 2021!
24 posts created (2%)
1,093 posts reblogged (98%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@sporesgalaxy
@jess-the-vampire
@mentalmeles
@anglerflsh
I tagged 1,070 of my posts in 2022
Only 4% of my posts had no tags
#toh - 810 posts
#wittebane brothers - 93 posts
#toh spoilers - 60 posts
#caleb wittebane - 36 posts
#toh hunter - 36 posts
#gravity falls - 36 posts
#animation - 30 posts
#i love this - 29 posts
#steven universe - 26 posts
#boost - 25 posts
Longest Tag: 72 characters
#the edge of the gabled roof lined up with the ceiling of the first floor
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
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Chapter 1: Charming Caleb Part 3
Start     Last     Next
Reblog don’t Repost please!
Chronological
Wow a second color! Maybe someday I’ll full on color some of this thing.
If anybody else wants me to @ them when I release new pages send a reply or ask or something ^-^   @astralix13 @fullnewperfection 
187 notes - Posted November 28, 2022
#4
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Chapter 1: Charming Caleb Part 4
First     Last     Next
Reblog don’t repost please!
Chronological
Caleb trying to forget about his weird dream and let things go back to normal. It helps that his life is so perfect in Gravesfeild, why think about some witch trying to trick him?
If anybody wants me to @ them when I release new pages send a reply or ask or something ^-^
@astralix13 @fullnewperfection
264 notes - Posted November 30, 2022
#3
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Chapter 1: Charming Caleb Part 2
Start     Next
Reblog don’t Repost please!
Chronological
Evelyn and Caleb first meeting! I love drawing these two, they’re 16 in this comic btw.
If anybody wants me to @ them when I release new pages send a reply or ask or something ^-^
354 notes - Posted November 23, 2022
#2
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Chapter 1: Charming Caleb Part 1 Reblog don’t Repost please!
Start: Here!     Next
A fateful encounter with a witch changes the Wittebane brothers lives forever. Can a twist of fate improve their ending or are they doomed from the start? An Owl House AU comic.
If anybody wants me to @ them when I release new pages send a reply or ask or something ^-^
Chronological
I’ve been milling around this idea for awhile and finally have enough planned i’m confident i will actually finish so might as well start posting. It starts with my interpretation of Caleb and Evelyn meeting but then take a hard left turn into a young Phillip centered AU with him and Caleb stuck in the modern boiling isles during season 2. Did i need to start with Caleb and Evelyn? Probably not, but look at them!
539 notes - Posted November 21, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
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1,063 notes - Posted May 29, 2022
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moonlit-imagines · 4 years
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Headcanons for being Jane Foster’s child
Jane Foster x child!reader
Thor Odinson x Foster!child!reader
warnings:
a/n: no not a foster child, jane foster’s child 😌 also im so super glad you liked those!!! hope these are just as good!!! and im genuinely so sorry these took so long
prompt: anonymous: “Hey! I just read the Tony Stark x Potts!child!reader HC and I loved it! Would you do the same but with Thor and Jane? ❤️”
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no babysitter = go to work with mom
dr. selvig gave you a rubik’s cube to keep you entertained
“fuck that! here, y/n, you can play my DS” -darcy
“can you not swear in front of my child?” -jane
you thought tonight would be boring, but then your mom and darcy collectively hit a homeless guy with a car!
“holy crap, we’re all going to jail!” -you
“don’t say ‘crap,’ y/n! we need to get him to a hospital!” -jane
ngl this dude was kinda funky
darcy used her taser and your mom covered your eyes, but you still peaked ;)
ride to the hospital
“don’t touch him, y/n”
“sorry, doc”
and the very next day you guys stole him 💕
“mr. thor, where are you from?”
“i am from asgard! it is much different from this realm, but your’s is adequate, i suppose”
“thanks?”
you could see the way your mom looked at him, though
he ate all the pop tarts >:(
she gave thor her ex boyfriends clothes
“yeah, donald was a real ass—” -you
“don’t say ‘ass.’ darcy curses too much” -jane
“sorry, mom...anyways, donald forgot to pick me up from soccer practice like, a dozen times. he sucked” -you
“this ‘donald’ doesn’t seem like a very good man...also, what is ‘soccer?’” -thor
you grabbed a soccer ball and tried to show him how to play but there was some other stuff the *scientists* had to take care of
you were a regular at izzy’s diner (well, mom was) and they always made you cute pancakes in different shapes!!
“ah, it’s a smiley face! that’s adorable!” -thor
“yeah! they like to surprise me whenever i come in. they’re pretty awesome” -you
*your mom literally beaming at how good thor is with you already*
you and thor were drawing on paper placemats
and then he broke a glass and you started giggling hdhshshs
but he had to leave
“no, thor, please don’t go!”
“i hope to meet you again one day, little one. hopefully fate sees it through”
:((((
no time to be sad bc ur mom’s lab got hijacked by the government
“hey, no fair! that’s my diary!” -you
“sorry, kid. there are constellation drawings we have to observe” -coulson
“aw, you draw constellations? wait, not now. you can’t just take all our stuff. especially that! that belongs to a child!” -jane
“sic ‘em, y/n!” -darcy
“don’t listen to darcy, y/n” -selvig
chilling in the trailer and missing thor bc he was the most interesting thing to happen to you and your mom in a while
and you wanted her to be happy even tho he was kind of crazy
“hey, mom? do you want to watch the stars tonight like we used to do? we could make s’mores?”
“that sounds like a great idea, baby! i’ve gotta go take care of some science stuff, so i’ll pick up some s’mores stuff while i’m out. love you!”
yeah she went to go see thor and he kinda got arrested but your mom came back home so you could watch the stars!
“so, do you like thor?” -you
“what? what makes you say that?” -jane
“it’s cool if you do, i think he’s awesome. a little weird, but at least he’s nice”
then thor and selvig came home and selvig was drunk as a skunk
*poking him while he giggles and tells you about thor*
“i wish your grandfather could have met that guy! he would have loved him...i wish you met your grandfather, too” -selvig
thor inviting you back outside
“i’d like you to teach me more about this ‘soccer’”
by the time you guys were done, it was 3am and you were too pumped to go to sleep
so thor told you stories of his home and battle and family
you didn’t want him to stop, you were fascinated by it all
and uhhhh yeah then earth kinda had some vikings show up
they told you that you’d “make a fine warrior one day”
and then yall got attacked by a ????? a what??? a destroyer???????
“get y/n out of here now! they shouldn’t have to see this!” -thor
you were still nearby and saw thor become thor again
after he was done fighting the destroyer, you ran to give him a hug
“that was awesome! can i hold your hammer?”
“maybe someday, little one”
then you didn’t see him for 2 years
which upset your mom a good bit, you had to help her through that episode. lots of sitting on the couch and eating ice cream together talking about how he wasn’t worth her time even tho you missed him too
but he came back! and then your mom sent everything flying bc she had an “infinity stone” inside her and thor took you two to asgard
“y/n! you’ve grown so much, i almost didn’t recognize you!” -thor
tbh you really digged the outfit they gave you, but also you were on another planet? thor insisted on giving you a tour (by flying you around)
“i do hope you’re having fun, little one!”
worrying about your mom simultaneously bc you overheard she was sick
but asgard got attacked and you and jane were confined to a room in the palace, which sucked because you wanted to see it all
but thor sent guards to bring you anything to keep you entertained
“maybe we’ll skip the mace for now, thank you” -jane
after several events that count as child endangerment, this chapter came to an end and your mom and thor finally made it official
loki called you a rodent and then saved your life so you were kinda iffy about him
about a year or two later, your mom had to travel a great deal in order to get some work done, so you were left in the care of thor, who took you to avengers tower
“oh, my girlfriend’s child is an angel! and they’re so intelligent, just like their mother!” -thor gushing to other partygoers
“yeah, thor, your ‘angel’ is sneaking drinks from the elderly” -tony
*sipping his beer* “they’re a growing teenager”
you did have an amazing time interacting with the avengers
and once they tried grabbing the hammer, you knew you had to get in on it (but you failed like the rest)
“don’t worry, my y/n, you have to be eighteen years of age to be able to lift mjölnir!” -thor
“oh, that makes sense!” -you, while thor aggressively shakes his head at the other avengers. he just wanted to make sure you didn’t feel bad you weren’t worthy yet :(
more child endangerment but really what did you expect?
thor went off world and your mom split it off w him but you did have his email so you were still in contact with him
swearing you saw odin on the street once or twice (fast forward)
and then your mom dusted and thor found you as soon as he possibly could, it was so good to see him
he took you in since you were alone now, you moved to new asgard and became prince(ss) of the new land by relation?? makes sense right
basically you and valkyrie made all the calls while thor grieved for years
but he still took care of you
“y/n, would you like to play video games with me? i think it may be a good bonding experience, what do you say?” -thor
“duh!”
uncle korg made you help him with fortnite while thor was asleep
you wished to wield stormbreaker one day
showing thor earth media! his favorite star wars character is r2-d2 dont ask why
he taught you asgardian recipes and you taught him...earth recipes?
when he was drunk he’d ramble on about his childhood and battle and enemies and jane and loki and hela and frigga and literally anything that came to mind
“y/n, could you please get me a beer? and get one for yourself, too” -thor
valkyrie most definitely gave you some battle training so you you blow off some steam, you were glad she taught you how to fight like a true warrior
thor wanted to teach you battle tactics so you could fight alongside him, but he never got around to it
a raccoon and bruce banner visited later on, proposing a way to get your family back, thor was an emotional wreck
his debriefing on the reality stone was tense when he started crying about your mom and everyone stared at you
“hey, don’t look at me. i don’t control the god, i just keep him company”
ending up waiting 1 second for the avengers to come back from their mission, resulting in you being stuck in the middle of a very heavy battle
“y/n, get out of here!” -thor
“don’t worry, thor! valkyrie taught me a few moves!”
“you make me incredibly proud, little one!”
“i’m not so little anymore, am i?”
“you will always be my little one, y/n. blood or not, that will not change!”
victory, but at what cost? it was a rough ride, you needed to get patched up, but your mom was finally home and thor...he decided it was time to leave earth again
“don’t worry, my y/n. i will see you again.” *tearing up* “i’m so glad i got the pleasure of raising you these past few years. i love you dearly, now go be with your mother”
you straight up wanted to bawl your eyes out right there
“well, y/n, you’re next in line for the throne of new asgard. what is your first command?” -valkyrie
“actually, i think you’d make a much better ruler than me. i’ve got to spend some time with my mother now that she’s home”
“you’re so much like him, you know that?”
staying with your mother, who was diagnosed with cancer not long after returning from the soul stone (a/n: jane getting cancer is canon in the comics and confirmed for thor 4)
“i missed five years of your life and now i’m sick, that’s just our luck, isn’t it?” -jane
she was understandably upset, but she also felt guilty
“mom, don’t beat yourself up. everything is okay, we’re still together right now. i won’t be going anywhere, i promise”
taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @lokihiddles // @frostedgiantfavs // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs // @johnmurphyisbisexual // @teenwaywardasgardian // @pappydaddy // @captainshazamerica // @freya-xo // @ravenmoore14 // @purpleskiesstorm // @ofthedewthesunlight // @canarypoint // @zoeyserpentluck //
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sl-walker · 3 years
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All right, since I’m in the middle of a flare and have to work manual labor for the next four days despite it, I figured I would make myself -- and hopefully other people -- laugh by talking about one of my favorite OG Captain Marvel stories. Namely, from Whiz #50, with a cover date of January, 1944, meaning it was probably produced sometime in late 1943.
I want to share it because why not, this is some absurdly charming stuff.
I’ll get more into why it’s one of my favorites as we go, in the form of running commentary. So, full story (with said commentary) under the cut. If you wanna just read the story without my commentary, stick to the pictures. XD
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First, let me say that the cover and splash page definitely live up to the story, though the cover’s a bit more sensationalized. But the premise is pretty damn simple: Our intrepid hero and his newsboy alter ego are on vacation. Cap decides to go swimming. It goes hilariously wrong and thus ensues a bit of a madcap adventure, no puns intended.
Second, the fact that Cap and Billy are depicted as essentially different entities makes what Billy does next the ultimate trolling:
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Gee, airing out the stolen laundry on the radio? Really? I’ll leave it up to you, gentle reader, whether Billy actually was trolling his own alter-ego for ratings or whether he was just innocently sharing the story while his other-self winced quietly in whatever ether-space he exists in when not front-and-center.
Either way, I love it.
Continuing on...
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I get a kick out of the fact that Billy’s monologue is that he’s no dare-devil. One, because that’s so obviously not true in any way -- (that kid is awesomely, sometimes recklessly brave on the regular even without Cap) -- but two, because the bridge is actually named Dare-Devil Bridge. We aren’t given any reason why this dangerous potential death-trap is there, hanging without so much as a gate or a warning sign or anything, because we don’t need one. It’s there specifically for what happens next.
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Which, of course, is Billy calling in Captain Marvel, who does some light complaining about the situation Billy left him in. There’s no bite to it, which I find adorable -- Cap actually does get frustrated once or twice in other issues with Billy calling on him for mundane stuff, though he’s never mean about it -- but there is a bit of the sense of being put-upon there that’s just-- I dunno, cute. It’s something I miss a lot in the various post-crisis takes on the character: That duality, that difference in personality, and the way each of them responds to different situations. Often, they’re on the same page, but notably, sometimes, they aren’t.
Someday, I promise, I need to sit down and write how I think that works between those two without being a truly frightening mental illness manifested, what with them being the same person but not the same person. Because I have so many ideas, and I’ve only had since the early-2000s to percolate them. LOL! But until then, just enjoy this.
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Here is another reason why I love the Golden Age Captain Marvel books and why I love this specific story: This is an absolutely normal, mundane thing to do. It’s the human thing to do. These aren’t the actions of some super-serious superdude. These are the actions of a pretty shockingly normal guy doing something mundane. And a whole story is built around that normalcy.
It’s cute. It’s funny. It’s the reader already knowing that he’s getting himself into a situation that he absolutely could have avoided, but also completely understanding how it happened anyway. It’s pretty brilliant writing: I say this as a pretty damned good writer myself.
So much of the reason why, I think, Cap was so endearing as a hero is that humanity. He’s got pretty much god-tier power in the Golden Age, once his powerset is established. He’s utterly invulnerable to all physical harm while powered up. But-- he’s human. He knows he’s human. He acts like it, and decides, “You know what? I’m going skinny-dipping.”
He and Billy are both characters it’s so easy to empathize with.
Also, a reminder that the art under Chief Artist C.C. Beck is really, really good. (He had a whole stable of artists to help produce this stuff!) Ignoring registration issues on the printing press, the actual line art is amazingly good; proportion and perspective and consistency.
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But anyway--Cap does get to enjoy his swim. But, then, oh no.
I love the idea of a world where the prime hero -- and he definitely is in that world -- can take off his suit and go swimming, and where someone else is bold enough to steal the damn suit off of him. The first time I read this, I started laughing here. Not at him, but at the situation he’s found himself in. At the idea that some random passer-by saw Captain Marvel’s costume and went yoink!
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Another thing I love about this particular story is how much Cap and Billy have to work together, just by necessity. Like-- it’s just really good. But anyway, thank everything Billy Batson is on the ball, coming to the rescue.
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Sheer bad luck via the weather keeps this story rolling along in hilarious misdirections. Realistically, that uniform probably wouldn’t be all buttoned together (we see Cap take off pieces of it aside the pants in other issues, including socks!), but who cares? The point of the story is that giant bear rug on the floor’s gonna get put to use.
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Man, when have you ever seen Superman creeping naked through some stranger’s house wearing nothing but a random polar bear because he went skinny dipping? No wonder these comics sold so well. This next panel is when I start wheezing, though, and pretty much keep wheezing.
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“A lady, too! I’ve got to get away from here!”
I’m dying at this point. That’s such a characteristic response, and yet, I think that’s why it’s funny.
Anyway, because this is an excellent story (I mean this without an ounce of irony, too), our dynamic duo stumbles across a plot in play to rob the hotel they’re staying at.
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Here’s a big part of why this is such a good tale: Everything fits. Even when it isn’t explained, like Dare-Devil Bridge, it still fits. Why is the tree down? Because there was just a thunder storm, the same one that blew Cap’s suit into the room with the gangsters.
I don’t know if this is Otto Binder’s story, but I wouldn’t be surprised in the least. It’s a complete story told in relatively few pages that accomplishes everything it’s meant to.
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Anyway, using foliage as cover, Cap gets to be heroic----then Billy gets to get back to the business of trying to stop the robbery of the hotel and get his heroic alter-ego dressed again.  Which leads to a rather adorable and funny scene of Billy not only trying to describe what Captain Marvel wears, but what size it would need to be tailored in.
(Cap is supposedly a 44 for a suit coat, we find in some earlier appearance, which would refer to his chest size.  So, an XL for shirts and suit-coats.  He’s a big guy, but he’s actually not a hulking huge guy.  But more on that later.)
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I love the fact Billy tries to like-- use himself as a model.  Maybe in another ten years, kiddo.  Billy’s actually pretty buff for like a 12-14 year old, he’s not a scrawny kid at this point, but yeah, no.  LOL!
Another thing I also really, really love about this style, though, is that they draw Captain Marvel as being strong, as having a powerful build-- but not as a dehydrated body-builder with deep cuts. He’s got human proportions, regardless of his strength; he’s got a human build, not a superhuman one.
C.C. Beck had a lot of things to say about superheroes who were just muscles on top of muscles, all clearly defined, and he didn’t like it.  As someone who first got into comics in the early 90s with Jim Lee’s X-Men--
I do get Beck’s point.  I not only get it, but I really highly approve of it.  He maintained to the end that he drew (and oversaw) the Marvel family to look like high school and college athletes, and I can see that.  I think the one person who’s gotten it right in the modern era is Evan “Doc” Shaner, who did Convergence: Shazam!  He not only nailed that strong-but-not-hulking build for Cap, but also how young he looked.  College-age, in fact.
But anyway, enough digression into art and why I like this better than most modern takes on the character.  Also, that’s just a cute set of panels.
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I also like that there wasn’t an easy fix there.  Cap’s still in his not-birthday suit, and Billy’s still stuck running around trying to solve the issues at hand.  Next comes some other really good panels:
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-snorts-  He’s locked in.  Yeah, that’ll hold him.
Anyway, what I really liked here was again that tandem working; Billy can’t punch through a wall, but Cap can.  Cap can’t crawl out while he’s au natural -- well, he could, but he’d probably rather die first -- but Billy’s got no such issue.  It’s just fun when you get to see them doing something like that.  You have to really think for a minute about the trust each of them must have in their alter-ego.
ANYWAY, we get the rare treat then--
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--of Captain Marvel not only yoinking a dude into a dark room, but then stealing his clothes.  Except, not his underwear.  Because that’s nasty.  LOL!
I love that in this series, you do actually get to see him wear other stuff.  Go incognito.  Get his red suit messed up enough to take it to a dry cleaner’s, wherein he ends up dressed like a musketeer after.  Jerry Ordway’s series is, I think, the only other time we see Cap not wearing his famous suit, but it happened enough in the Golden Age that it wasn’t a shock.
Like, I hate to be the one to say this, but I do think DC drops the ball often on just how much you can do with Captain Marvel (or Shazam, depending on timeline, but that’s the wizard’s name to me so mostly I’ll stick with the original name) if you unbend enough to.  It’s not just the costume change, or the duality of him and Billy being the same but not, but also his inherent, essential humanity.
But I am digressing again, sorry. XD  I just feel strongly enough about these versions of these characters to spend hours writing this.
Anyway, only a single panel later:
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And that’s that!  Billy Batson has just outed his own alter-ego’s most embarrassing moment to whomever’s listening to WHIZ radio -- thank everything podcasts and the internet weren’t available then, ha! -- and we get to see a recounting of a very fun story.
Like I said earlier, I love this one for its essential humanity.  The hero got himself into this mess, he and Billy got him out of this mess, and stopping the criminals was actually just kind of a lucky stroke thrown in there.  But even though Cap got himself into this, the story never treats him like he’s stupid.  It never treats him like he’s some kind of idiot.  You’re laughing, but-- not in a mean way.
I love how human it is.  How complete it is.  How genuinely funny it is.  It’s a thousand times more funny when you genuinely love and respect Captain Marvel and Billy Batson, too.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this dissertation on a skinny-dipping hero.  LOL!  I enjoyed sharing it with you.
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morepeachyogurt · 4 years
Text
a sky full of stars (and she was looking at her)
Word Count- 2.8k
Pairing- Penemily
Summary- Penemily highschool au where they are paired up on a English assignment! Based on this post.
Part 1 of my, maybe we’re from the same star, series
Read it here on ao3
Tw’s- very small mentions of substances, minor swearing
A/N- this is the first installment of a series based on my yearning posts, and my first time writing romance/3rd pov, I’d love some feedback!
It’s hard to miss Penelope Garcia. With her bright clothes and brighter personally it seems like the sun shines a spotlight on her. Her golden hair is like a halo around her, she looks like an angel, and perhaps one of these days Emily will get the courage to talk to her beyond small talk and group presentations. She’s pulled out of her thoughts when the shrill bell rings, too loudly for her tastes but this whole building seems to scream at her, so perhaps it’s fitting.
Ms. Blake starts to talk about ancient poetry. The greats from the time periods before everything got so complicated. English is not Emily’s favorite class but somehow Blake’s class is more or less interesting, is it because she’s a milf? Maybe, who’s to say. As the class nears its end, she announces, “Alright, as we close out our poetry unit, we have one last assignment that hopefully at least one of you will enjoy, it’s a group project where-” immediately two hands go up ready to ask the question that always gets asked when a group project is announced. “Before you ask, no, you aren’t picking your partners, I am,” a collective groan comes out of about half the class. Emily isn’t too mad about it though, she doesn’t have many friends, especially in honors English. JJ barely passes English as it is. She’s all alone here, so she’s glad she doesn’t have to suffer through the awkwardness of trying to find a partner before everyone else does and ending up with the one kid who she’s pretty sure has been high the entire year and likes to leer at her in the hallway. “For this assignment, you’ll have to analyze one famous poem, from whatever time period you’d like, and write an essay about the poet’s intentions. If you’d like extra credit, which I know for a fact some of you need, you can do a reading of the poem in front of the class or do a drawing that represents it. Any questions?”
The classroom fills with questions of ‘when is this due?’ And ‘this sucks do we have to do this’. Emily however, is distracted by one very colorful girl in the upper left corner of the room, her spot in the back lets her admire the view without being caught, which tends to make it difficult to pay attention, but well, some things are just more fun than others. Her attention is drawn back to Blake when she hears her name followed by Penelope Garcia.
Oh shit.
On the one hand, this is exactly the opportunity she’d been looking for to ‘make her move’ so to speak, on the other, she’s terrified of making a fool of herself. Emily realizes that she’s been sitting for a bit too long when Blake stops talking and the rest of the class has already paired off. She catches Penelope’s eyes and tries to fight the blush of her cheeks. The sound of her docs hitting the linoleum is a bit too intense for this setting, she prefers their ‘clunk’ when it’s a crowded room, and she can walk like she owns the place. Emily sits down at the desk adjacent to Penelope and gets ready to ruin her chances with her.
“Okay! Hi! I’m Penelope! Which you already knew because Ms. Blake announced it, but it’s polite to introduce yourself to people so I thought I would do that now which I’ve done so I’ll stop talking now!”
Emily can’t help but giggle a little at her rambling, she doesn’t want her to stop talking quite yet, her voice melodic to her ears.
“So, I’m not big in poetry, I’m more of a comic book gal if you catch my drift, so I was hoping that you had some thoughts?” She drags the o in hoping and trails off waiting for Emily to fill in the blanks. It takes her a second too long because her brain is short-circuiting but she manages.
“Yeah okay, um, I’ve read some Sappho back when my mother was stationed in Greece? That could work?” she hopes bringing up Sappho wasn’t too obvious of her intentions, but it was all she could think of. Sappho had a point when she said ‘Sweet mother, I cannot weave – slender Aphrodite has overcome me with longing for a girl’
“Yeah okay! Cool! We’ve got like 3 minutes left of class, would you want to go to Bricks and Beans after school to work on it?”
“Uh yeah, yeah, that, um, that sounds great! I’ll meet you in front of the school?”
“Yep!” She pops the ‘p’ and Emily thinks she can’t possibly get cuter.
Emily’s walk to lunch has never been quite this mix of excitement and anxiety as it is now. Hopefully, JJ will be able to make sense of what’s happening because the wires in Emily’s brain are very much twisted.
“Okay, I’m telling you it’s not a date,”
“Yeah I know it’s not technically a date but come on. I personally have never asked my group project partner to a coffee shop before. She obviously likes you.”
Jennifer Jareau has been blessed with the right combination of looks that ensures she never had to wonder if her crushes liked her back. Emily wishes she had that special brand of confidence, but it’s simply not realistic, the number of openly queer girls at school is small, the number of them that would be interested in her? Even smaller.
“Look I’m not going to be the loser that gets my heart broken all right,” she steals a fry off of JJ’s tray before her hand gets smacked.
“Ugh I’m so bored here, promise me you’ll at least try. I need some new drama around here and you two would be so fucking cute.”
“Fine. On the condition that when* it goes south you’re buying me ice cream.”
Emily’s day goes by slowly and all at once. Hours turn into years turn into seconds and before she knows it she’s awkwardly standing outside the building waiting for Penelope to meet her.
When she does, Emily’s pulse quickens ever so slightly in her presence. It’s annoying as hell.
“I was worried you were standing me up,” a futile attempt on Emily’s behalf of trying to seem calm, cool, and collected.
“What! I would never, I’ve been looking forward to getting a macchiato and hanging out with you and Sappho all day! Coolest ladies from recent history,” she has to try and stop herself from getting too excited at Penelope’s words, they don’t mean anything, she’s just some loser that she has to work with to get a good final grade in the class. A means to an end, disposable.
“I don’t think Sappho counts as recent history but thank you, ma’am,” ma’am? God, what is she doing, this is going to go south faster than the time she tried to wear ripped jeans to one of her mother’s stupid dinner parties. To her surprise, her stupid comment is met with a giggle on Penelope’s part.
“Why thank you darling,” she replies in a phony southern accent that makes them both crack up, “Lead the way.”
Bricks and Beans is the staple coffee shop where all the high schoolers hang out after school or work during college. The owners are a sweet old couple in their 70’s who seem to be reliving the past with the vintage decorations. The pair settle into a table in the back, a window next to them showing off the highway. Emily is tasked with buying the coffees and Penelope rattles off her order filled with things Emily’s never even heard of.
“Okay, I’m pretty sure the barista is laughing at me now but here is your sugar coffee with whipped cream,” she says as she slides into her seat, placing down the coffees on the minimal free space left.
“My savior,” she says, fake swooning, “Okay so, Sappho? That’s the lesbian right?”
Emily answers with a snort before actually replying, “Yeah that’s the lesbian. I’m sure Blake will love it. I’m like, 90% sure she’s gay.”
“Single English teacher who loves Oscar Wilde? Yeah, I get it. My gaydar is spectacular by the way.”
“Oh yeah?”
She nods.
“Um, yeah, okay how about this poem:
‘and in your song most of all she rejoiced.
But now she is conspicuous among Lydian women
as sometimes at sunset
the rosyfingered moon
surpasses all the stars. And her light
stretches over salt sea
equally and flowerdeep fields.
And the beautiful dew is poured out
and roses bloom and frail
chervil and flowering sweetclover.
But she goes back and forth remembering
gentle Atthis and in longing
she bites her tender mind’”
“That’s gorgeous,” Penelope had a dreamy look in her eyes, like seeing a beautiful sunset for the first time. Except, instead of a sunset she was looking at Emily, seeing her, like for the first time, “I love when artists talk about the stars,” she leans back on her chair and looks up as if she’s looking at a constellation and not an off-white popcorn ceiling. Her collarbones are exposed and Emily feels like a 17th-century peasant pining over exposed ankles, “There’s just something about the stars ya know? They’re so far away, but sometimes it feels like we’re there with them. They twinkle at us and at each other,” she pauses to make eye contact, “maybe the greatest love story is in the sky,” there’s a beat too long, Emily doesn’t know how to respond to that comment, it’s hard to follow art without ruining it.
“Or maybe I’m just a sad sap for romance.”
“No!” She gets a of couple heads turned her way, the exclamation too loud for the environment, “I mean no, I get what you mean, they’re beautiful. Sometimes at night I go on my roof just to stargaze. It’s so peaceful there,” it’s now or never, “you should do it with me someday.”
“I’d love that,” it’s almost bashful, the two of them hoping the underlying meanings of their words are being shown, lest their hopes not be conveyed and come shattering down like a falling star.
The sun slowly sets as they work on interpreting the inter-workings of Sappho’s mind. The drinks run out so Emily buys them both hot chocolate, extra whipped cream and chocolate chips for Penelope. When she takes a sip, the whipped cream sticks to the side of her face.
“You got some whipped cream on your face,” she gestures to the offender in question. The blonde tries and fails, to get it off.
“Did I get it?”
“No, it’s more,” after some failed attempts, and the failure of Emily’s common sense, she decides to just get it off herself. It feels too intimate too quick, they both freeze, Emily’s hand inches away from Penelope’s face. Their eyes lock, scared brown eyes met soft blue ones and just for a second, there is peace in between their beating hearts and hands. Emily quickly brings her hand down and mumbles an apology.
After three hours they call it a night, Emily now the proud owner of Penelope’s phone number. On her drive home, she wonders if she’d done right, and she wonders if she’d done wrong. If she was clear about what stargazing meant to her. A branch into her world, her safe space. To share the dark night sky with something is to share your soul with them. Even JJ didn’t know about her nighttime viewings. Did Penelope feel the same way? The shared smiles and small laughs pointed yes. But Penelope was Penelope and Emily was Emily. How could an angel love a human? Why would it sacrifice its virtue for the danger of love? If Penelope was pink and Emily was dark green, could they mix and make something beautiful or would they both end up a ruined brown?
Dinner is tense as always, she does not share anything with her mother, she does not want to. They tiptoe around each other hoping that they won’t step on each other’s toes and crash. Emily retreats to her room the second dinner is over and opens a window. She loves that it gets dark earlier now. The fresh fall air trumps that tacky of scented candles that fill the house in a futile attempt to make it a home. She opens her laptop to finish the concluding paragraph of their essay. She allows herself to be lost in the words of another in order to avoid her own problems of love and belonging. Her phone rings. It’s her problems. They chat with careful conversation about their project and finally, it is finished. It looks good actually, or at least, to Emily it does. It’s not going to win them a Pulitzer, but they’ll get an A.
And then, “Hey.”
“Hey?” They’ve been on the phone for a half an hour, she’s not sure why she’s being greeted all of a sudden.
“Does your offer to stargaze still stand? It’s nice out tonight and, I don’t know, it sounded nice?”
“Yeah of course! Do you, um, do you need a ride or?”
“Nah I got my license and good old Esther. I do need your address though.”
“Oh yeah, I’ll text it to you. Who’s Esther?”
“My car! She’s a lovely thing thought she needed a name. I’ll be there in say, 15 minutes?”
“Sure. Bye Penelope.”
Holy shit.
Okay, she’s got 15 minutes to both have everything ready, but also seem completely casual about the fact that her crush is coming over to stargaze on her roof. The ambassador is long retreated either in bed or into her office, so she shouldn’t be a problem. Emily grabs a couple of blankets for them to sit on to avoid the chilly breeze and a bag of popcorn. She brushes her hair and touches up her eyeliner, not that it’s really visible in the dark, but it helps her feel confident which she’s desperate for at the moment. Her phone buzzes with a text, *im here!!!* It reads. She takes a deep breath before very slowly opening the door.
“Hi,” she whispers, the wind carrying her voice, but it’s just loud enough for its recipient. She closes the door
“Hi! So! Stargazing? That’s fun, I’m like, really excited it’s been a while since I’ve done something like this,” she somehow makes a whisper seem filled with enough energy to power a flashlight that Emily definitely should have brought. They make their way to the intersection where the hill meets the rooftop, and they only trip once, on a stick, but together they stay upright. Emily throws the blankets on the roof and climbs up on the chair before throwing her body on the roof. With her help, Penelope makes her way up after a couple of tries. By the time they lay the blankets out and are sitting down, they’re both practically crying from laughter, her nerves from earlier disappearing slowly.
The laughter fizzles out, and they’re both left staring at the stars. Penelope apparently is an expert of both astronomy and astrology so Emily’s ears are blessed with the sound of her voice. Like sunshine on a sweet summer day. She thinks that Penelope and her are like the sun and the moon, both beautiful, and complementary. Emily’s gaze shifts from the constellations to Penelope’s side profile. The stars shine almost as bright as her, and she can’t help but watch her instead. She can see the stars in her eyes, perhaps they were always there, but they’re more visible now looking in their reflection.
“God they’re beautiful,” Penelope says in awe. Like she can’t believe she’s blessed with the presence of the stars when really it is the stars who should have the honor.
“Yeah, yeah they are,” at this point she’s openly gazing at Penelope. When Penelope turns to meet her gaze she thinks she’s been caught, that it’s over and this night will be one for the ages in terms of beauty and heartbreak. Slowly, a hand makes its way to her cheek, cold like the air around them, but it somehow manages to set her skin on fire.
“May I?”
Emily nods and then they are lips on hers, it is sweet just like her. She’s being kissed under the starlight by a girl who deserves only beauty. Perhaps her dark green can be the field by the sunset of Penelope’s pink in the painting they make together. They do not have to mix, they can simply be combined to create something stunning. They can simply be. They pull apart slowly, and looking into her eyes, Emily thinks that the stars in comparison are simply dull. There is nothing as bright and beautiful in the world as the eyes of your lover.
Tag list- @royalpenelope @scandinavian-punk @kermitsaysgayrights
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danny-chase · 4 years
Text
Hello, are there any Cassandra Cain fans/stans that could help me out with her characterization? I’ve just started to get into writing fanfiction (I haven’t posted any, and am working towards getting more confident with writing the characters in general so hopefully I’ll post some someday) and I haven’t been in the fandom long. Cass is a confusing character for me to write, mostly because I feel like she’s written differently in everything she’s in. And her personality absolutely got erased and overhauled in the New52. I’ve read some of her Batgirl run (it was awhile ago ngl) and I read the storyline where she was introduced in the New52 and the Rise and the Fall of the Batmen (I think that’s the arc she’s involved in with Detective Comics). Idk, more under cut.
My goal in writing Cass is to make her seem like a real person and I’m drawing more on pre-New52 than post-New52. I feel like she used to have so much more to her than just being like a perfect person and the sweetest person in general. Not that she can’t be sweet (I love cinnamon bun Cass too), but she used to have much more grit to her personality it seems like. I’m blending the two personalities, and I’d really like to focus on her love for dance, it’s one of the changes I really liked, and of course her connections to her siblings because I love sibling dynamics. Currently I’m working on a fic where she ends up dancing with each of her siblings. I like the idea of writing her as a bit snarky or sassy (the kind of person that just stares at you with the “really” expression when you do something dumb), more introverted, a bit of a little shit, self deprecating, but genuinely kind hearted, driven, and a perfectionist. I also don’t want to write her as being a magic character that instantly knows what’s wrong with a character. Yeah, she can read body language, but her family is good at hiding things, they’ve been trained recognizing body language and I’m guessing some of them have worked to have good control over their own. My interpretation is she can tell what people are feeling but not why, and how they’re going to move. I’ve written a little bit of the fic so far (um please don’t feel obligated to read through it, any comments on how you think Cass should be written is helpful) so I’ll post it below. Thanks for reading this far if you made it XD.
I don’t have a title for this lmao but the fic starts here:
“Hey.” Dick gently placed a hand on her shoulder as he hopped down from his spot on the water tower. “You know who’s my most favorite, strongest, most beautiful, spectacular-”
Cass groaned; he was making the face. He was wearing his Nightwing mask, but as she turned to look, she could already tell he was making the face. Dick ignored her groans and continued “-most perfect, amazing, gorgeous, sweetest, nicest, kindhearted, thoughtful-”
Cass pulled away; she would not be doing what he asked. Nope. The last time she heard Dick talking like this, Barbara ended up agreeing to dog sit for Titus. The dog chewed everything in the clocktower; they were still finding ripped up socks in various locations. “He’s so well behaved” he said. “It won’t be for that long” he said. “You’re the best thank you so, so much” he said. On the bright side, Dick had bought her new ballet shoes to replace the ones Titus tore through. But they’d taken weeks to break in and-oh he was still talking.
“-smartest, wisest, funniest, loveliest, badass, awesomest, funnest-” Cass placed her hands on her hips and stood up to meet him. The stakeout had been going fine on her own, at this rate she probably didn’t need his backup anyways, so if this was something stupid, she could always tell him to leave. She gave him her best “bat-glare” as he continued to mumble on compliments. “fantastic, reliable, trustworthy-” his voice grew smaller as she continued glaring. He cleared his throat “sister of all time?” He finished.
Cass sighed and leaned back against the tower’s support. “What do you want?” Dick gave her a weak smile, embarrassment radiated off him. That couldn’t be good.
“Look, I’ll cut to the chase.” Thank heavens for that. “But like, just know I love you so much.” Cass wished she could stick her tongue out, maybe the domino mask was the way to go. She settled for lightly shoving his shoulder. He grinned at her, doing his best to seem casual, but slight tension in his neck gave away his discomfort. Dick was always hard for her to read, he was a performer from birth, and had excellent control of his posture and facial expressions. He gave himself away in movement, in the lack thereof. He could paint the perfect mask, but it slipped slightly when he moved. He was nervous, anxious, exasperated, and worried. Cass was intrigued.
“What is it?” She said, more gently than before, turning back to watch her mark. She could hear Dick let out a deep breath.
“It’s Da-Robin. He got invited to a formal.” Cass turned back and cocked her head. “Don’t give me that look, you know how he is.” He said, shifting his weight. “It’s a school event, so they’ve been learning ballroom dance in gym. But I got a call the other day from the gym teacher saying he’s not participating.”
“Why should he?” Cass asked. “You shouldn’t force people to do things they don’t want to do.” Living with the family long enough had taught her that. If the kid didn’t want to dance, he shouldn’t have to.
“Yeah, I know.” Dick replied a bit flatly. He moved to crouch where she had been sitting and focused on the building across the street. “But I don’t know if he doesn’t want to, or if he’s just embarrassed.” Cass thought for a moment. “I don’t suppose he grew up with many dance lessons.” He added a bit apologetically. She shook her head.
“Have you talked to him?” She asked. Dick sighed.
“I tried. But he kept switching topics and when I pressed it, he locked himself in his room. Which is why I’m concerned.” Cass hummed in affirmation. It made sense.
“Why haven’t you tried teaching him?” Dick wasn’t a bad dancer, and he’d always performed quite well at the galas.
He looked back at her sheepishly. “I gave it a go last time I was at the manor. But he stormed off before we could get anything done. Something about me being an embarrassment to the family.”
Cass rolled her eyes under the cowl. “What did you do?”
“I just wanted to do some jazzercising to warm up, what’s wrong with that?” Dick spluttered in response. Cass lightly smacked the back of his head. “So anyways, I lost my chance at it. I can’t even play music without him running away.” He continued, ducking away as she tried to tap him again. “Besides, you’re probably a better height to practice with for him.” She scoffed in response.
“When’s the gala?” She asked. It slipped out without her permission. She wasn’t getting involved. The kid could figure it out on his own. Couldn’t he?
“It’s next weekend.” He replied and sighed. “I don’t want him to miss it. He never does stuff that’s age appropriate.” Oh, no. Not that card. Cass would not be involved, she had work to do. She stepped back to lean against the tower again and bit her lip. “And some girl in his class asked him to go. Her name’s Maps and she’s a really good influence on him.” She crossed her arms tighter. Damian was rude to her. He called her Cain. Not. Getting. Involved. “She’s so energetic, it helps him loosen up-” Damnit.
“Fine.” Dick whipped around to look at her, not bothering to hide his disbelief. She squirmed internally. It wasn’t that she didn’t care about the kid. It was just easier to spend time on her own. The kid was better off without her influence anyways.
“Are you sure, I could ask Steph or I don’t know-” He continued.
She cut him off. “I’ll do it. I don’t mind.” The others wouldn’t work. Dick knew that going into the conversation. They were too…loud in their judgement. Steph would laugh at the wrong time, Tim would say the wrong thing, Jason didn’t have the patience for the kid’s temper, and Duke would be a safe bet, but was away on Outsider business for the next two weeks.
Dick practically melted in relief. “Thank you so-”
“You owe me, big brother.” Cass reminded.
“Anything you want, little sister.” He promised. “Are hugs acceptable as a down payment? I could kiss you right now.”
“Eww.” Cass made a face under the mask but strode forward as he opened his arms and stood for a hug. He eagerly wrapped her in a bear hug. She couldn’t help but laugh.
“You’re winning sister of the year award.” He said as he released her.
“You’re making me cookies.” She retorted. Dick grimaced.
“Can I buy them?” He asked hesitantly. She shook her head.
“Homemade, with love. And I’m watching.” She added, smirking under the mask. Dick sunk back down into position.
“I’ll do my best.” He promised. Cass snickered. The last time Dick tried making cookies, he apparently caught his oven mitts on fire. There was still a bit of cookie dough on the ceiling he hadn’t noticed yet.
A flash of movement jolted her back into reality, their mark was making his move. She shot her grapple, and Dick quickly followed suit. “I’ll text you the plan tomorrow.” He promised as they leapt into the night.
Thanks so much if you read this far, and please comment or send me feedback directly if you have the time and don’t mind. I’m sorry if you completely disagree with how I characterized her (or Dick/Damian for that matter) I’m mostly relying on Damian’s canon interactions with her and Dick’s half canon half fanon personality (I know they don’t get on great in the comics...but sibling dynamics) and the rest of this portion of the fic would focus on Damian earning more respect for her (and learning to call her Cass - not Cain).
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yoon-kooks · 5 years
Text
Witch Hazel- Pt.6
Tumblr media
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Genre: FanficWriter!Jungkook, Idol!Reader, College!AU, Angst, Fluff
Summary: There are two students in your art class with a secret: you and the quiet Jeon Jungkook. You’re a problematic idol singer, infamous for your ice cold reputation and perpetual resting bitch face; he’s the artist and author behind the viral comic series based on a certain ice queen idol. After a blowup of destructive rumors, lost motivation and inevitable solitude, you stumble upon Jungkook’s comic and find a new and unexpected light.
Word Count: 3.5k
Warnings: none
Parts: 1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // ?
A/N: i’ve had mixed feelings about the tumblr fic community as of late :/ but heres something to read🥺
-
Holding the boy’s pinky in your own, you stare once more at his drawing of you with your guitar and flower crown—a superhero to those whom you shared your music with.
No. Your music hasn’t saved anyone. You’ve never been a hero to anyone. If anything, you’re the one who needs to be saved. You’d always thought you could grow strong enough to save yourself if you just closed yourself off from the world and did everything on your own. But in the end, that only seemed to hurt you more.
You should’ve known. It’s okay to ask for help, to reach out, to let him in.
“A few years ago, I had a thought. It wasn’t a very smart thought, but I decided I wanted to share part of myself with the world. I thought about the different ways I could go about that, but the way that made the most sense for me was music,” you say, finally letting go of Jungkook’s pinky and making yourself awfully comfortable on a bed that doesn’t belong to you. “So I auditioned for Polar Entertainment. Not to be an idol, but to be a songwriter.”
Jungkook doesn’t say anything, but he nods as if it’s not a shock to him, as if he saw it as “a Y/N thing to do.” At the same time, his gentle eyes wait for you to continue, curious to know what’ll happen next.
“Do you remember the song you heard me singing the other day in the music room?”
Jungkook cracks a smirk and starts singing your song word for word in a surprisingly in-tune whisper. Oh, he remembers it alright, and he’ll apparently never let you live it down. He doesn’t stop until you throw one of the balled-up blankets at his face.
“That was the first time I picked up my guitar and sang that song since being rejected at the audition.”
“I can imagine how scarring that would be. Rejection,” he shudders at the word, though you’re sure he knows little about the feeling with art skills as professional as his. “They really didn’t like you though?”
“They liked certain parts of me.” Your vocals, your beauty, your body. “But not the ones that mattered.” Your music, your creativity, your personality. You.
“That’s their loss,” Jungkook says in the midst of a yawn, practically inaudible. But you heard him.
“Maybe they had a point,” you say, looking up at the ceiling. “Because when I look back to that time, it was quite foolish of me to believe my music would reach anyone when it came from a place of desperation, not my heart. The song was a plea for help, not one that would save others.”
“What made you suddenly sing it again after all this time?”
You grab hold of the boy’s hand and form yet another pinky promise. “Promise you won’t laugh at me for my reason.”
“I can’t promise you that,” he says with the straightest face. He’s ready to burst out laughing again and you know it.
“Then I won’t tell you.” With a hmph, you bury yourself under the fluffiest blanket. You wonder how he would’ve reacted if you told him it was that dang jk.seagull and his fanfic that gave you the courage to sing again, to go back to your roots, to follow your love of creating music. It’d obviously sound ridiculous to admit it out loud, but the joy you feel from reading Witch Hazel is what reminds you of the very thing you want to provide others with—happiness.
And that’s perhaps all the encouragement you needed to start sharing your music again.
“I won’t tell you what it was exactly that made me do it, but I’ll tell you why,” you peek your head back out of the blankets to see the boy still waiting patiently for an answer. “I wanted to move on… from the failure I faced that day. That way, I can finally become that superhero you speak of.”
You place the drawing of your superhero self onto the nightstand so that it doesn’t get crinkled up on the bed. No, she’s not a superhero yet. But she will be someday.
“I’ll look forward to it.”
“You better not tell anyone,” you remind him. “This isn’t something I share with other people. Ever.”
“I won’t tell anyone,” he assures you, with not only his words but also his warmth.
“Good.” You smile whilst closing your eyes. You meant to tell him that he could confide in you too, but the warmth pulls you into a deep slumber before you could do so.
-
It’s been a minute since you’ve awoken in someone else’s bed, though this is the first time you aren’t all wrapped up in their embrace. Rather, half the boy’s body is hanging off the side of the bed for dear life while you’re right smack in the middle, all bundled up in one of the blankets.
If you wanted to, you could push him over the edge with the tiniest tap of your foot—that’s how close he is to falling. But as tempting as it would be to get even with the boy who teases you to no end, you opt to quietly check your phone without disturbing him.
To your surprise, you have two new notifications: a text from Seokjin earlier this morning and a late-night update from jk.seagull posted sometime after you had passed out. You’ve always been the type to take care of work obligations before indulging in guilty pleasures, so you open Seokjin’s text first.
6:04AM jinnie “so jimin’s manager reached out to me”
6:05AM jinnie “and you want to collab with jimin?”
7:12AM Y/N “oh yeah i asked him to have his manager contact you”
7:13AM Y/N “but i guess i forgot to tell you LOL”
It’s not that you forgot. You were just hesitant to tell your manager about it yourself. Because if possible, you’d like to minimize your own company’s involvement in this top-secret scheme of yours.
7:15AM jinnie “are you up to something?”
7:15AM Y/N “mayhaps”
7:16AM Y/N “but dont tell boss lady pls”
7:17AM jinnie “shes going to find out one way or another”
7:19AM Y/N “thats true 🤔 ”
7:20AM Y/N “well tbh knowing her, she’d probably approve of the collab anyway since it should clear up those dating rumors while (hopefully) appealing to jimin’s fanbase”
7:21AM Y/N “just dont tell her the logistics of the collab”
7:21AM jinnie “what are you scheming lmao”
7:22AM Y/N “youll see”
7:22AM jinnie “ 😒 dont get me or yourself in trouble Y/N”
7:23AM Y/N “i wont! i promise! 🥺 ”
7:24AM jinnie “okay fine”
7:25AM jinnie “ill arrange a meeting with jimin and his manager to discuss everything formally”
As you move on to the more exciting notification on your phone, you see that the sleeping Jungkook has slipped several inches closer to falling flat on his face. Maybe you’ll save him from his impending doom. Maybe you won’t. But that’ll have to wait until after you see what jk.seagull had to say on his blog.
“do you ever think back to that one time in math camp when a little girl screamed in your face that she hated math and wanted to become a musician instead? apparently she somehow confused ‘musician’ with ‘mathematician’ LMAO”
You aren’t sure what provoked the silly seagull guy to share such a random thought, but you do get a good laugh out of it. After all, you can totally relate as someone who went to math camp one summer despite knowing in your heart what you truly wanted to do-
Wait.
“Jungkook,” you say in a half-hushed, half-urgent tone, though calling his name wouldn’t be what actually wakes him from his slumber. “I think I know who the seagull guy is.”
Thud. You swear on your life you didn’t lay a finger on the boy when he fell, despite all the devilish thoughts you had about it earlier. He fell on his own. You’re innocent. Therefore, you have a right to laugh.
“Are you okay?” you snicker, peering down from the bed at the dazed boy. He might have been the biggest klutz for rolling off the bed and stumbling around to find his glasses, but holy shit. His wild bedhead and scattered blankets across the floor make it seem as though the two of you had a lot more than just an innocent heart-to-heart in his bed last night.
“I’m fine,” he stretches his arms and combs the bedhead out. Yes, he is fine. “But, uhh, what’s this about that seagull guy?”
“I think I know him.” You expect Jungkook to be as excited as you are, but he just seems kind of puzzled—perhaps from his lack of sleep.
“…and how did you come to that conclusion…?” he asks. Or maybe he doesn’t believe you.
“You didn’t see the post! Look at the post.” You join the boy down on the floor and make yourself at home there with your phone and some of the fallen blankets. He leans over your shoulder to read the infamous post you won’t shut up about.
“Math camp?” Jungkook continues to squint at the cryptic message before chuckling. “Also, did that girl seriously confuse musician with mathematician?”
“Stop laughing! That dumbass was me.” Now you wish you had kicked his ass off the bed.
He stops laughing, not because you told him to but because he’s mildly shook. “What?”
You take a deep breath in because you know you’re setting yourself up to be clowned for the rest of your fucking life. “When I was like ten, I told my parents that I wanted to be a mathematician, thinking that word meant musician. So they signed me up for camp that summer.”
“Did you ever stop to think that mathematician has the word math in it and not mu-”
You interrupt the boy’s unwelcomed commentary with an air-punch to his guts before continuing on as if nothing happened. “I was so excited until I got there. It was absolutely mortifying to learn that it was a math camp, not a music camp.”
“I like this story,” he nods with his arms guarding himself in anticipation of another air-jab as you square up.
“Still, I tried to make the best out of the situation since I was actually kind of good at math,” you say. “The camp director even told me I’d make a great math professor one day.”
“I can’t imagine you as a math professor.” He settles down with all the chuckling.
“I couldn’t either, so I ran off to an empty room where I thought I could escape without anyone finding me,” you soften your tone. “But somehow a crying, wandering boy found me.”
“Was it the seagull?”
“Maybe. All I remember was hearing music playing from somewhere outside. I sang along as a way to comfort and distract myself from the whole math situation, but it seemed to cheer up the boy as well.”
“Your voice does have that effect, you know.”
“He told me the same thing.” You can’t help but smile a little at the compliment. “But in that moment, it felt like my dream had a purpose beyond fueling my own desires. And I needed to share it with someone. Anyone.”
“So you shared it with the boy?”
You nod. “I told him my dream was to be a mathematician, but he knew what I meant.”
“Did he at least clown you first?”
“He did. He laughed right in my face, and at first I thought he was a jerk for making fun of my dream. But after he kindly taught me the difference between musician and mathematician, I announced my actual dream to him and him alone.”
“And how’d he respond?”
“He said it was cool beans.”
“He said cool beans?”
“Those were his exact words, yes.”
“And that was it?”
“That’s all I can remember.”
“So you don’t even remember his name or anything?”
“We never introduced ourselves,” you shake your head. “I don’t remember his face either because it was covered by a hood and long hair.”
“That’s too bad,” Jungkook sighs. “I bet it really was that seagull guy after all.”
“I have a feeling it was him, too.”
It would be nice and awfully romantic if you had somehow crossed paths long ago with the very seagull who continues to inspire your craft with his own. But even if that isn’t the case, you’re content with having that memory and entrusting it with another boy who has done nothing but lift you up.
You lean yourself gently against the Jungkook’s shoulder as you slip your phone back into your pocket, debating on your next course of action. The two of you should be getting ready for class, but that doesn’t sound very appealing. There are other things you’d much rather be doing, like maybe thanking the boy for lending his ear. But for some reason, it’s still difficult for you to say those two simple words of gratitude.
Perhaps it’s difficult because there’s a lot more you’d say than just “thanks man.”
“Can we just cut class and get coffee instead?” Yes, you’ll thank him for his service by treating him to coffee. Unless…? What if this is just your subtle way of asking the boy out on a date? What if he says no because you’ve already spent way too much time with him in the past 24 hours? What if he hates coffee? What if he-
“We should probably go to class to turn in our project, yeah?” Jungkook brings up a good point. But the thing is, you don’t really have your priorities straight at the moment and your mind has only two things consuming it: coffee and boy. “But we can get coffee after class.”
“Ooh, good, because there’s this one coffee shop I want you to try!” You chirp up despite your nonexistent dose of morning caffeine. “It’ll be my treat as thanks for… letting me hog your bed.”
“Oh right... that,” Jungkook hops to his feet and starts tidying up said bed. You help by picking up and folding all of the blankets. “I nearly froze and fell to my death because of that, you know.”
“I saw,” you bite your lip, trying to mask any naughty thoughts that come to mind. Because next time, if there is in fact a next time, you won’t let the boy freeze.
-
By the time art class ends, the weight of the dreaded group project has been lifted and your craving for coffee begins to settle in once more. And apparently, the hunger and excitement is radiating off you because someone has the audacity to make a comment about it.
“Why does your face look like that?” Taehyung teases, but you’re mildly offended.
“Because I’m getting coffee from my favorite café. That’s why,” you hiss but there’s still a hidden glow about you and your excitement. “Coffee is to me as girls are to you, Taehyung.”
“Ooh, speaking of girls, do any cute girls work there?” He strokes his wise man beard. “Maybe I’ll tag along.”
“I don’t fucking know.” And even if you did know, you wouldn’t say yes.
“How boring,” he yawns while nudging the boy next to him. “Hey Jungkook, wanna go on a double date with me? I met a pair of gamer girls, but I don’t know all the nerdy gaming stuff that you know. And think about it, this could be the first time you get laid since-”
“Actually, Jungkook’s getting coffee with me,” you interrupt. And if you had been brave enough to look up at the boy as you spoke, you would have seen the healthy pink radiance on his cheeks.
“Oh, so the two of you are dating all of a sudden?” Taehyung nods, as if he had hit the mark.
Neither you or Jungkook give an immediate answer, probably due to the unspoken yet very apparent shift in dynamics between the two of you as of late. Yes, you’ve developed certain feelings for the boy, but no, you aren’t technically “dating.” You just hope he’s on the same page as you.
“It’s just coffee,” you want to say, but it comes out of Jungkook’s mouth instead. And even though you would’ve said the same exact thing, it hits a little different hearing it from him.
At the same time, coffee is coffee and Jungkook is Jungkook. You need to remind yourself that your craving for coffee with the boy will be satisfied, regardless of whether it’s a date or not. After all, “dating” is not an option for an idol who should only be focusing on her music and fans.
“Which drink would you recommend?” Jungkook asks as you lead him in the direction of the café.
“If you like coffee, all of the drinks are good in my humble opinion,” you say, though you realize you should probably give the boy a few specific suggestions to make his decision a little easier. “You can get a standard mocha or latte if you want something simple. Or, their signature hazelnut coffee is really really good. Or if you want something iced, you should try the cold brew because it’s literally the most refreshing dose of caffeine ever. Oh! But if you’re into something more plant-based, I suggest the maple oat-”
“You’re not narrowing down my options if you recommend the entire menu, Y/N,” the boy chuckles at your coffee enthusiast behavior.
“Well, here’s my thought process: if we go at least once a week after class, you can eventually try every drink on the menu by the end of the school year. Not including all the different types of milk options though.”
“I don’t know if I should be impressed or terrified that you even bothered to do that calculation.” His eyes are bigger and brighter than the sun. “But that must mean you really like coffee then, huh?”
“Of course! Is that even a question?” The snobby coffee enthusiast jumped out real quick. But even beyond the coffee, you did the calculation to see how long your little coffee not-dates with the boy could last before you have to return to your idol obligations. “You like coffee too, right?”
“Not really,” he sighs. Your jaw drops. Who the does he think he is? “Are there any tea options? Or like a banana milk or something?”
“You can’t just walk into a coffee shop and not order coffee.” Is this guy for real? No, he’s just fucking with you. Probably. “I better start reevaluating who I hang out with,” you say with a sarcastic hmph.
“I’m kidding, kind of.” He doesn’t do a very good job of reassuring you of that. “I like… coffee.”
“That hesitant pause doesn’t sit well with me, Jeon.” You raise an eyebrow at the suspicious boy. It feels nice to tease him for once. “Why are you grabbing coffee with me if you don’t love it?”
“I just curious about this coffee place,” he nudges you, “since someone seems to really enjoy it.”
So it’s because of you…
“Good to know I’ve successfully peer pressured you into consuming caffeine,” you hum, playing it off as if his words weren’t absorbed right into your heart. It was never about coffee.
It’s about you and him.
The thought of that makes your heart scream a little, so you hide your flustered face behind your phone as the two of you approach the coffee shop. You have an unread text from your manager.
2:35PM jinnie “good news”
2:36PM jinnie “i set up a meeting with jimin and his manager in an hour”
You stop in your tracks. That’s not good news. Well actually, it is good for your top secret collab. But the timing of it all is anything but good.
“Are you searching up the menu online? Oh wait, you already have the entire menu memorized from A to Z.” He thinks he’s funny. Now is not the time, Jeon. His teasing smile doesn’t disappear until the distress is written all over your face.
How do you cancel a not-a-date date without a proper explanation? How can you do that to a boy who has only ever done you right? The thing is, you don’t have to hurt him.
You can cancel the meeting, you can bail out on the collab, you can disappear from the idol world altogether if you choose to do so. And if you didn’t want to go that far, you could instead tell the boy of your deepest and darkest secret, of your idol identity, and he would surely understand your reasons for having to leave so suddenly for work.
You could do any of those things, but you decide not to. You won’t allow yourself to make such a rash decision, even if it’s the right one. So you decide to keep the meeting, you decide to keep your idol self hidden in the shadows, and you decide to abandon the boy.
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thirsty-x1 · 5 years
Text
Walking In The Winter | Kim Wooseok
Request:
Can I request a Wooseok scenario in which the reader is a single parent and both of them have known each other for a long time. Wooseok starts to get closer to the reader as well as the child gradually and the once suppressed feelings of both the reader and Wooseok, towards each other start to return stronger than ever. Fluff please ^_^
↬ Pairing: Wooseok x fem!reader.
↬ Genre: Fluff, super slight past Angst?
↬ Warnings: Wooseok being too fucking cute?
↬ Word Count: 4.3k
↬ Song Recommendation: “Walking in the Winter” by Yun Ddan Ddan. Originally I was going for another title but after reading the lyrics it fit too well... plus Wooseok is obsessed with this song and that’s adorable.
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The tiredness spread on every inch of your body, the pain making itself notice with each step you took while going upstairs, the view of the hall becoming slightly comforting as you searched for the keys in your purse. Before unlocking the door, you took a deep breath, trying to put on your best face and getting in to be greeted with a walking Wooseok that constantly shushed the asleep kid in his arms. When your friend heard the door closing, he turned around to give you a small smile, pointing a few times towards your child.
“Thank you for taking care of him today…” Leaving everything by the entrance, you silently went to him, extending your arms to grab your son and quickly taking him to your room.
As soon as you made sure he was sleeping comfortably and kissed his forehead, you went back to the living room. You were about to grab your wallet when Wooseok stopped you.
“How many times do I need to tell you that this isn’t necessary?” His hands were gentle as he put the money down. Just then was that you noticed the small cut under his right eye.
Getting closer to examine it, you held his chin. “What happened to you?” He blinked a few times, the words not coming out and making you notice the rushed action, instantly pulling away while muttering an apology.
“Ah, I must have gotten it with him… he really likes to play with my face.” Wooseok let out a small laugh as he tapped his skin a few times and checked his fingertips.
“Must be because you have such pretty eyes.” He lowered his gaze, hiding the light blush on his cheeks. “Wait here, I will go look for something to cure it.”
There was no place for him to deny your offer this time as you left him alone, grabbing the first aid kit you kept close just in case and telling him to sit down on the couch. Imitating him, you faced him, cleaning the tiny wound and blowing on it when the alcohol made Wooseok flinch, your expression distracting him from the stinging. He would be lying if he denied that his heartbeat got faster with your every touch, so lost in the moment that it almost surprised him that it was over so soon. Now he felt the bandit on the place and held back a laugh as you took a picture of him and showed how it looked, the Doraemon design making a fun contrast on his usually serious face.
“Thank you.”
“I think it might leave a scar though…”
He scoffed at the mention. “It’s fine, really, don’t worry about it.” His phone rang and right after he picked up his stuff. “Ah, I think it’s pretty late so I should get going–”
A sound coming from the bed room interrupted both of you, making you sigh as you got up. Of course you missed sharing more time with your kid, but it became a bit hard to do so when you came after work, your body and mind not being ready to handle with it even if that’s what you wanted with all your might.
“You can go Wooseok, thank you so much–”
He shook his head. “Let me help and then I’ll go, you look too tired.” Ah, so he noticed. His pace got quicker towards the bedroom. “Besides, you don’t need to thank me every time, it’s been two months already.”
With a slight chuckle, you dragged your feet behind him, laying down next to the small body of your son and playing with his hair as he let out a few cries. Apparently, he had a nightmare and since he was alone, he got scared.
“What’s your plan?”
Your question made Wooseok roll his eyes as if it wasn’t obvious, a sweet melody filling the room as he sang the lullaby you knew well. He was making some arrangements to the song, the beat becoming slower and somehow sadder, but it seemed to work nonetheless. However, like this you got to pay more attention to the lyrics, your sight fixed on his expression and how the feeling seemed to be completely different from other times he had sang it, but Wooseok stared at the way the kid’s eyelids started to close again at the sound of his voice.
When he finished, he looked your way, only to find you sleeping soundly just like the child next to you, the resemblance striking him as funny. He stood up, trying to not disturb you as he put a blanket over you and left the room, flicking the lights off. Grabbing a pen, he scribbled a message on one of the notebooks he had used to color with his new favorite person and grabbed his keys, more like the ones you had given him in case an emergency happened and left the apartment.
The cold breeze reminded him of the song, scoffing annoyed at the lyrics. Well, he wasn’t annoyed at the song itself, but rather the memories it brought to him. It hadn’t been long since you two got in contact again… Years had passed since he heard your name, but three months ago that had changed when he crossed paths with that asshole. No, it wasn’t his intention to listen to his conversation, but he couldn’t quite help himself when he started talking about you with his friends, laughing at the mention of how he had cheated on you and you asking him to leave. After that, he tried to somehow find you, knowing that you would most probably need someone’s help, and at the time he didn’t think about others being able to lend a hand. Maybe it was because he wanted to be the one to be there for you, to fulfill the promise he made when you two were young, or maybe he simply wanted an excuse to see you again. He wasn’t quite sure, even to this day.
But he didn’t need to understand it. He tried to convince himself about it. Letting go of you had been extremely painful for him, and now that he was able to be with you again, he didn’t want to ruin it. So, he didn’t need to understand his feelings now. It wasn’t the time to be selfish.
Ignoring the freezing cold, he put on his air pods and hit the play button, scoffing once again as his healing song started playing. Without putting much resistance, he started walking, humming to the melody while doing it so.
When you walk, your heart will tell you. Wooseok didn’t need to understand, but he really hoped his heart would tell him whether he was doing the right thing or not this time.
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It was one of those miraculous days where you got to go home early, your mood brightening even if there was still some tiredness in your system. The reason? Because you would be able to spend some time with your beloved son, and maybe get to spend some time with Wooseok, invite him to have dinner now that you got the time to prepare it, just as a way to thank him for all the help he had provided you the past few months.
You weren’t expecting his call that day, nor any other day, if you had to be honest. It had been some years since you last saw him, things between you not ending well and that weighed you, but there was nothing any of you could have done to avoid it. After your ex and father of your son left, you felt a little bit lost, almost instantly regretting your decisions when the screen of your phone lit up with an unknown number. Slightly scared of it belonging to him, you picked up, your eyes filling with tears as the familiar low voice greeted on the other side of the line, wondering if it was your phone number. Of course he went silent the second you said yes, the awkwardness lingering in the air before he proceeded to ask how you were, and since then none touched the topic about what had happened once a long time ago.
Maybe because both of you knew what happened, and understood each other and your reasons to have done that. You were pregnant, and at the moment you thought about prioritizing family… how were you supposed to know that the man next to you would turn out to be an ungrateful asshole? And although kicking him out pained you, in the end you hoped to have taken the best decision, both for you and for the future of your son, but even then the thought of him asking for his father someday hunt you every day.
Reaching for the doorknob, you breathed in, collecting yourself as you opened the door and heard a cheering scream followed by tiny steps running towards you. The bags on your arms almost fell to the floor as you picked up the overjoyed kid, not caring about the paint in his small hands staining your clothes and kissing his plump cheeks. Wooseok stood up from the floor, giving you a small nod as a greeting before he helped you out with the groceries, taking them to the kitchen and starting to put everything in its place. The subtle detail made you smile; nothing had seemed to change between you two, and it made you happy. It was as if you had never stopped being friends, as if he had never left, making himself comfortable in your apartment after the six months you had shared together.
“Thank you for babysitting him again.” Wooseok sighed frustrated but shook his head the same way he had the last two months, giving up telling you to stop doing that.
The kid in your arms held your face, his fingers leaving a trace of paint along the bridge of your nose before laughing hysterically. “Hyung and I have been painting! Want to see?”
You giggled at his enthusiasm, getting closer to the table where a spectrum of different drawings were spread. Your son pointed out the fox, the cat and the wolf that he drew, ignoring what seemed to be panels that told a story in a similar way to a comic, the style reminiscing you of the drawings that Wooseok used to make when you were young. Right as you were about to read it, delicate fingers covered the paper, your friend coming back just in time to have you more intrigued about the story.
Trying to ignore it, you complimented the rest of the paintings. “You did so well! Aren’t you a whole artist? I think you deserve a prize…” His eyes got bigger waiting for it. “A thousand kisses!”
The whole room was filled with his vibrating chuckles as you snuggled and pressed your lips to his cute face, Wooseok smirking as he saw you two, warmth spreading through his body before remembering he was staying more time than what was needed.
“I should go now–”
“Hyung deserves kisses too!” The innocent demand made you both stop. “He also drew a lot and he’s good, right?”
How to explain this to a four year old? “Well, yes, but–” You could already sense the grumpy expression coming and that usually was followed by a waterfall of questions, so you simply leaned in and pressed a kiss on Wooseok’s cheek.
“That was one kiss.” What a witty kid. “And you should do it like in dramas!” His body stretched to grab one of the drawings by the older to show you an example, but what was pictured made your cheeks burn.
It had been a memorable day for him too, apparently.
“Those kisses are for special people!” Wooseok’s voice got high pitched as he snatched the paper as delicately as he could in order to not scare the kid. “Friends don’t give those to each other.”
The frown on the child’s face grew. “But mom said you were someone special for her.”
“N-no, I didn’t say that–”
“Yes, you did! After the first time hyung came home!” His memory was a blessing when you were forgetting to take something to your work, but right now it was closer to become a curse than anything else.
“Playtime is over, go wash your hands so that you help me cook, yes?” Sighing in defeat, he ran to the bathroom as soon as you put him on the ground, the mention of food distracting him enough to forget the recent argument.
You walked to the kitchen, ignoring Wooseok’s lingering gaze as you ran the water in the kitchen and scrubbed the rests of paint off your hands.
But he had to clear his throat. “So I’m a special person to you, huh?” That was something you wished had changed: his teasing nature.
“Uh, yeah…” The hesitation in your voice was obvious as you turned around to face him, not expecting him to be that close. “Am I?”
By the way his eyes started shaking, you could say he wasn’t ready for a comeback. Even if he hadn’t changed much, you did, and it appeared as if he was noticing it just now. However, his actions didn’t waver as he took a few tissues behind you, dampening them with water and pressing them against your face, cleaning what your son had left.
“You always were.”
It was hard to breathe if he stared at you with such intensity that made you forget how to even pronounce words, the sincerity sounding too real for you to brush it off as a joke. Thankfully, his phone received a message, giving you the perfect opportunity to turn around and hide the blush in your face while grabbing what you needed to cook.
“Hyung, will you stay for dinner?” The small voice caused you to close your eyes, slightly cursing at yourself for not having asked that to Wooseok before.
“Ah, I don’t think I can tonight, buddy… maybe next time, yes?” He ruffled the little one’s hair before grabbing his stuff and walking to the door. “Sorry to leave so hurriedly but I have to be somewhere, is it–”
“Yes!” It wasn’t your intention to raise your voice like that, but the mix of emotions inside you was hard to control. “I mean, yeah… it’s totally fine, don’t worry.”
“I’ll come back tomorrow.”
“Mhmm.”
If you tried to talk again, you were almost sure that you wouldn’t be able to hide anything, so the only option was to give a short, simple answer. You could sense his hesitation but still the door closed behind you, the air becoming much lighter.
A sigh caught your attention. “I wanted hyung to stay…”
You smiled picking up the kid and handing him the plastic mixing bowl he liked to play with. “Me too, baby, me too.”
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After that day, none of you exchanged more words or looks than necessary. He would get home right on time for you to go work, and as soon as he came he would say goodbye. The atmosphere had somehow became more awkward than the first day you met each other again, and it was hard for you to figure how to change it. Each time you were about to ask if he wanted to stay, he had already left the apartment, your anxiety increasing. You didn’t want him to think that you were merely using him as a babysitter, although you had to recognize that it helped you out quite a lot and even more during holidays.
The couch welcomed your body as you flipped the pages of one an album, the unusual silence making you feel lonely and causing you to come up with ways to find comfort, old photos apparently doing the work. You had asked for the day off and it was also the birthday of a friend of your kid, so you dropped him there early and now a good few hours awaited… but it had been so long since the last time you had an opportunity like this that you weren’t sure what to do.
Getting overwhelmed with the nostalgia, you left the photo album on top of the small table and went to your room, taking off the old pajamas and instead trying on a dress you hadn’t worn in a long time. It looked nice… and it also felt nice. You tried fixing your hair in different ways, laughing when you realized you had been making faces in front of the mirror for the past ten minutes.
A knock on the door interrupted your fun, nervousness starting to settle in your system while you tried to remember whether you had told Wooseok that he didn’t need to come today or not. When you got to the door, taking a glance through the peephole was enough to confirm your suspicions: you hadn’t. Hiding behind the door, you opened, him walking right inside with a heavy bag, stopping a second to take off his shoes and then continued, slumping down on the couch.
“I brought the games you asked for, kiddo, better come here before your mom leaves or… Wow.” His eyes finally looked your way when you closed the door, his mouth dropping open before he cleared his throat and stared at the bag he had. “Where is–”
“He had a birthday party today.” He froze. “And I have the day off.” You could see his posture change. “I forgot to tell you, I’m so sorry–”
Not a second later, he stood up, picking up the bag and walking to the entrance. “That’s fine, don’t worry, I’ll leave right now.”
This was your chance, and it was slipping right between your fingers, so you took it. His steps came to a halt, the grip on his sleeve making it impossible for him to move and you made the biggest effort to get over your fear.
“Would you like to stay?” Wooseok didn’t say anything. “You already came all the way here… and I’ve meant to thank you for these past months.” What a ridiculous excuse.
As if he could read your mind, he turned around, giving you a half smile. “I would like that.”
It was your turn to freeze, appreciating the small distance that separated both of your hands before waking up from the trance to go to the kitchen. “Coffee?”
“Mhmm.”
The silence prolonged, although the weird feeling that was present the other days had vanished. You weren’t sure if something changed, but it made you feel relieved. Quickly, you prepared a cup for each, smiling to yourself when you noticed you still remembered the way he liked it. When you turned around, he wasn’t behind you, but rather checking the album you were flipping through before on the couch. You handed him his cup, cautiously analyzing his expression when he took a sip of it and feeling warm when he smiled.
“Glad you like it.”
You sat next to him, getting comfortable as you peeped over his shoulder to see the picture he was staring at fondly, your heart tumbling seeing it was you and him years ago, the dress you were wearing looking more alive than now. And the look in your eyes was different too, even if it wasn’t evident because you were staring at Wooseok laughing, one of the few pictures you had of him doing it.
“You looked beautiful that day.” It seemed as if he was talking to himself, studying the picture and comparing it with his drawing. “Just like now.”
Taking compliments wasn’t your biggest talent and he knew that, flipping the page and stopping abruptly at the envelope that rested in the next one. The edges were worn out from the amount of times you had opened it to read the letter inside, the words in it becoming your healing song whenever you faced a hardship in the past.
“Ah, that–”
“I can’t believe you kept it.” His eyes looked sad as his fingers caressed his own calligraphy spelling your name on the front.
You had to swallow before answering. “It’s precious to me.”
“My confession letter?” He laughed, shaking his head in disbelief. “It was so bad.”
Even if he was talking about himself, it made you feel offended, grabbing it and holding it close to your chest. “It’s not!” Wooseok stared at you wide eyed. “The only bad thing was the timing.”
He couldn’t hold back his laugh. “You are right there… I don’t know what was I expecting.” He scratched the back of his head.
“The truth, I guess.”
“What?”
Was there any use in lying about it now? “Well, I liked you too… but I was already dating with–”
“The asshole.”
You chuckled. “Yeah.”
The silence grew between you two, but this time Wooseok was the one to cut it.
“You never told me.”
Shrugging, you caressed the letter. “When I had made up my mind, you had left and I was pregnant, so… I thought the right thing was to move on.”
Wooseok’s piercing gaze was fixed on you, but the confessions were too many for you to face him while saying it out loud, so you kept fidgeting with the end of your dress, remembering how he had complimented you back then during your birthday party and how later his hands had been on the exact same place when you shared your first kiss. The next day you pretended nothing had happened, afraid to ruin the friendship, and it wasn’t until a year later that the paper between your hands confessed that he had done the exact same thing for the exact same reason. But it was too late.
“And what do you think is the right thing now?” You raised your head, finding Wooseok just a few centimeters away from you.
“I don’t know…” Your eyes dropped to his mouth. “I don’t think it matters, either.”
Just like that, his lips were on yours, the same feelings that invaded you that one time making themselves notice again. The electricity itched in your fingertips as the letter slipped of them, his hand resting on the back of your neck to bring you closer, stealing your breath right after you recovered it over and over again. You lost track of time, your chest welling up with all the repressed feelings as he held you between his arms, feeling weightless under his touch and becoming conscious of the burning sensation that his fingers left on your skin as he traced senseless figures on it.
When he finally pulled away, both shared the stupidest grins.
“That felt right, at least.”
Maybe it was the dress, or the kiss, or the situation, or simply Wooseok, but for the first time in years you laughed the way you did back then, and he did the same. Silently, you thanked to the objects next to you for helping you recreate a new cherished memory, although you were sure you wouldn’t need anything to remember this one.
The coffee went cold as the two of you kept talking about the past, confessing each other small secrets, some reminiscing of ancient times while others were incredibly recent, like him saying he was really happy when you cured the small wound on his face, or you telling him that you really loved his voice when he sang and that you wanted to hear it again since that night, or him explaining that the reason why he always left was because he didn’t trust his friend Seungyoun to take care of his apartment not one bit (sometimes threatening him to move his whole studio there).
A familiar melody caught your attention, making you grab your phone and pick up the call ignoring Wooseok’s mocking faces (“that’s my song”), nodding a few times before hanging up.
“The party is about to finish… do you want to walk with me there? It’s not very far away from here.”
“Sure, but under one condition.” You hummed for him to continue as you got up. “Keep the dress on. It really looks pretty on you.”
If it weren’t because you were in a rush, you would have called him out on his cheesiness, but secretly you appreciated it. “Shut up.”
Not ten minutes later you were already walking down the street, close to each other without being able to erase your silly grins from your faces. As you got close to the address, you saw your son running towards you, immediately blabbering about all he had done during the day and greeting Wooseok as if nothing. A few blocks later, he was complaining about walking, saying he was too tired for it and demanding to be picked up and of course Wooseok gave in immediately, the child falling asleep on his shoulder in record time as you continued walking. You felt a small touch on your hand, turning to see the male’s fingers hitting yours on purpose while pretending to look away until you finally held his hand, intertwining your fingers with his.
“You know…” His voice was soft as if to not wake up the toddler. “I could get used to this.” His eyes dropped to your hands and then to his other arm holding your kid. “If you agree on it, of course.”
The tightness in your throat didn’t let you answer, just like the day he had handed you the letter, but this time you simply nodded and kissed the back of his hand, ignoring the pressure in your chest. “I would like that.”
Wooseok pressed his lips together, his eyes becoming small as he tried to hide his happiness.
“I would like that too.”
A sleepy voice added its opinion: “Me too!”
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I’m... quite proud of this one. Yes, it’s fucking long for the kind of stories I tend to write but it just;; happened;;; I really hope you enjoyed it tho kasjkdjks. I was going to try and make the child gender neutral but since I wanted them to interact plenty with the kid I just went for he/him pronouns to fit the gif ^^;
~Nani
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chiaki-translation · 4 years
Text
Luminous Circus: Event Translation Ch5-6
I make it a target for myself to finish this event before Kazu’s birthday. Lucky my school hasn’t started. When school started, I might not be able to update as much. Thank you for everyone’s nice comment, I don’t really have confidence in my translation, but if there are people out there who think it’s good enough and enjoy it, I’ll continue to do my best. Thank you once again and enjoy the next chapter~
Ch3-4 / / Ch5-6 / / Ch7-8 / / Ch9-10 / / Epilogue
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Disclaimer:
A3! is owned by Liber Entertainment
Translator’s Note: Just so you’re not confused, when I wrote painting, it is referring to the painting that you do with brushes and other art materials. When I wrote picture, it is referring to pictures taken by camera.
Homare:
…Hmm.
(It has become quiet.
It seems that the typhoon has passed.)
Hisoka:
…Zzzz.
Homare:
(I woke up slightly early today…)
--Uh, it’s gone awry again.
Even though Tasuku-kun just repaired it.
(I don’t want to ask him so often.
I’ll just leave it as it is for now.)
<Shifts to Homare’s Mansion>
Director:
Woah, such an amazing mansion.
It’s like something out of a movie.
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Kazunari:
It’s the residence of a literature master! So emo! Can I take some pics!?
Homare:
I don’t mind.
Kazunari:
The interior’s pretty elaborate, it really fits Aririn.
Director:
You’re right. I can easily see that Homare-san was raised here.
Homare:
Really?
Come, the room is over here.
<Shifts to Outdoor>
Homare:
!?
This is--
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Director:
The glass is broken.
Is it because of the typhoon…?
Homare:
I have to check inside.
<Shifts to Grandmother’s Study>
Homare’s Grandmother:
Oh, you’re back.
Homare:
Grandmother!
It’s dangerous to stay over here.
Homare’s Grandmother:
It’s fine.
It’s just a bit dirty.
Homare:
The painting…
Homare’s Grandmother:
It was just nice at the place that was hit by the rain.
Homare:
Let’s get it fixed immediately.
Homare’s Grandmother:
No, there’s no need.
It’s my fault for not moving the painting inside.
Homare:
But, it’s your treasure--
Homare’s Grandmother:
Everything will break someday.
It just happened to be now.
Homare:
There’s no such thing!
Even if it breaks, you can repair it again, just like this pocket watch--
Homare’s Grandmother:
It already stops moving.
Homare:
--
It can’t be, it’s just a bit awry just now.
Homare’s Grandmother:
We can’t go back to the past. That watch too, this painting too.
Let’s just leave it be until the room reconstruction begins.
Homare too, don’t enter for a while.
Homare:
Kazunari:
Please wait a minute.
Homare’s Grandmother:
?
Kazunari:
The painting’s repair, can you leave it to me?
I’m also a painter, if you just give up on it like that, I’ll feel bad for the person who drew it.
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Homare’s Grandmother:
Kazunari:
The person who drew that painting must have contained his feelings inside this painting.
If it’s left just like that,  don’t you think it’ll be very sad for him.
Homare’s Grandmother:
…Do as you wish.
Kazunari:
Aririn, sorry for being selfish.
Homare:
Not at all, thank you. Kazunari-kun.
Director:
I also think that we should give it a chance if it still can be repaired.
Of course, it might not return to what it used to be, but it’s better than not doing anything.
Homare:
Yes. I also think the same.
Kazunari:
Then, I’ll do my best!
Can I get a picture of the original painting?
Homare:
Picture of the original…
Director:
Maybe, you don’t have it…?
Homare:
The, there must be someone in this mansion who has taken it before!
Let’s search for it!
<Shifts to Muku/Kazunari’s Room>
Kazunari:
Aririn, the painting’s dry now. So, have you found the picture?
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Homare:
Hmm… About that, I can’t seem to find even one picture.
Director:
Eh!? Really!?
Well, we don’t know how the original painting looks like, but let’s just try to repair it somehow…
Homare:
Alright, I’ll draw it from my memory!
Director:
From memory!?
That, that is, how to say…
Kazunari:
Ah! Then, let’s try to draw a rough sketch first?
Homare:
Alright.
If I remember… Over here is like this, like this, it’s this kind of painting!
Director:
Thi, this is…
Kazunari:
Umm… This, what kind of painting is this?
Homare:
About that, I don’t know as well…
Director:
Homare-san also doesn’t know…!?
Homare:
Anyway, there’s no mistake that it’s a painting like this!
Director:
(We, well, there are a lot of different kind of arts, and we cannot say that this is not it, but… no matter how you look at it, I can only see scribbles.)
Kazunari:
It’s rather abstract, it’s going to be difficult to perfectly copy the picture…
Homare:
Ah, I see…
Muki:
I’m home.
Sakuya:
Sorry to disturb you.
<End of Chapter 5>
Muku:
Ah, Director-san, Arisu-san.
Director:
Welcome back, the two of you.
Where did you come from?
Sakuya:
They released a comic version of the movie we watched the other day, so we went to the bookshop to buy them.
Kazunari:
He~, I see.
Muku:
That painting, what happened to it?
Director:
Actually…
<Short Time Skip>
Muku:
I see.
Kazunari:
It’ll be great if we can repair it somehow, but…
Homare:
But, even though it’s grandmother’s important painting, she doesn’t seem to be enthusiastic about the repair.
She also doesn’t tell me much information about the original painting…
Kazunari:
We’re stuck huh. What to do…
Homare:
Why is it that grandmother is so reluctant to repair it.
Sakuya:
From the beginning, why is it that this picture is so important to Homare-san’s grandmother?
Is it just a painting that she likes?
Homare:
Why… I wonder why.
When I think about it, I never heard of the reason before.
Sakuya:
I thought, a treasure is not something that you can easily found.
For me too, I received a lot of important things since I entered the troupe, but when it comes to treasure, it’s not easy to choose.
That’s why, I don’t think she only likes it, there must be a reason behind it.
Homare:
A reason huh… Hmm.
Muku:
Maybe it’s related to your grandfather.
Your grandmother and grandfather got married because they deeply love each other right.
Homare:
Yeah, there’s a possibililty.
But I don’t have much memory about my grandfather.
What I can remember—
Grandfather and painting, is it…
<Recall Memories at Grandmother’s Study>
Homare:
…Grandfather?
Homare’s Grandfather:
Oh, it’s you, Homare, what is it.
Homare:
Grandmother said the tea is ready.
Homare’s Grandfather:
Thank you. I’ll be there soon.
Homare:
That pocket watch, is it broken again?
Homare’s Grandfather:
Yeah. But it’s already repaired.
Recently, the number of parts has decreased, it’s getting harder and harder to maintain it.
My sight is getting worse too, this watch and me too, we’ve become old.
It’s been 30 years huh…
Homare:
…?
Homare’s Grandfather:
That painting was drawn around the same time that I bought this watch.
That painting, it’s an important memory of my time with grandmother.
<Back to Present>
Homare:
Right.
He said that it’s an important memory of his time with grandmother.
He didn’t tell me what was really drawn there…
Maybe, we can find another message by grandfather on this painting.
Kazunari:
Ah! There’s something written on the back!
Homare:
“To the meddlesome you, with love. Miyako.”
Director:
Eh?
Kazunari:
Miyako is, your grandmother’s name?
Homare:
Yeah.
Kazunari:
So, it’s something that Aririn’s grandmother give to your grandfather.
Homare:
I’ve always thought it was a gift from grandfather…
Director:
When you talk about treasure, I guess it’s something that you received from someone else.
Muku:
Is it possible that the treasure isn’t that painting.
Homare:
What do you mean by that?
Muku:
Grandfather said that it’s an important memory right.
That’s why, I’m sure that the painting is full of precious memories for the two of them, the treasure then refers to those memories doesn’t it.
Director:
I see. It’s not the painting, but the precious memories, I wonder if grandmother meant it that way.
Homare:
Not the item but the memories…  I see.
Once again, I fail to understand people’s feelings.
Kazunari:
I wonder if I ended up doing something unnecessary.
Director:
But, I’m sure that grandmother’s happy by your feelings.
Otherwise, she won’t even let you try to repair it.
Tomorrow, why not we try to talk to her again.
Then, we can rethink of what we can do in this case.
Homare:
Yeah, you’re right.
Kazunari:
Let’s do that.
<End of Chapter 6>
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lovewriting-5 · 4 years
Text
Rules:
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*gif credit goes to @angelshizuka*
9. Confessions
11. Breaking Free
10. Screeching Tires:
We carefully enter the house, I call “Hello! Hello? Claire? Stephen?” When there is no answer, Daniel says “Looks like grandma and grandpa haven’t come back from church yet.” Sean looks at us with a little smile, “Well. At least they won’t yell at us for going out...” He says “That was so cool to spend time with Chris at the market! Did you know Chris’ mom was an artist?”
Sean says “We...didn’t...How so?” He says “She drew comics! You guys should see her drawings, they’re so cool. Just like yours!” Sean tells him “Thanks, dude.” Daniel looks around, “Hey! Uh...” I ask, suspiciously “What? What is it?” He says “Sean, (Y/N)...I wanna go check on the room...upstairs. I know it’s mom’s. Please...”
Sean and I look at each other. I tell him “Daniel, you heard Claire. They will freak out if they know we went inside. We promised them.” “We won’t tell them! We’ll be in total stealth mode! They won’t know anything if we make it quick...” he contradicts.
He also throws in “It’s just...I really want to know what’s inside. What kind of stuff she had. Chris had tons of things that belonged to his mom. And I have nothing! Come on...You guys don’t even have to come with me...if you don’t want to...”
“Fuck it. We’ll come with you...So you don’t make a mess and get us caught.” Sean tell him. The three of us head upstairs and go straight to the locked bedroom door. Daniel tries the knob. Frustrated, he says “The door is still locked! I just...Don’t get why they lock the room. What’s the big deal?” Sean says “We’ll find a way to open it.”
Mischievously, Daniel says “This is super easy! I can just break the lock with powers!” I say “Yeah, we could do that with a hammer...” “Let’s try and find the key instead, right?” Sean says. He says “I’m just gonna clean up real quick.” As soon as he went into the bathroom, I tell Sean “Sean, I’ll keep watch while you and Daniel search for the key.”
They begin searching all around the second floor. I was starting to get a little nervous that Claire and Stephen were going to return any moment. I tell them “Hurry up! They might come back any minute!” Sean says “Yes, we know. I can’t find the fucking key! We just need five minutes.”
I was sitting at the top step, keeping an eye on the front door. After five minutes, Sean sits down next to me. Frustrated, he says “I give up. This is impossible.” He then says “DANIEL!” Daniel comes walking over to us. Sean asks “You really think you could open this door...without doing too much damage?” A smile shot across his face, he says “Yes! I know I can.”
We stand up and follow him to the door. Cautiously, I tell him “Go for it.” He says “Yes!” Sean reminds him “And don’t blow apart the whole house...” Daniel holds out his hand and uses his power. There was a blast. I holds my arms in front of my face to block it from the debris. We see the damage. Sean asks, annoyed “Really?” He says “Oops...”
The two of them walk in the room. I stay in the doorway to still keep watch. I figured the two of them need to do this together. Daniel says “Wow. There’s not that much left. Where do you think they put the rest of her stuff?” Sean tells him “It’s her teenage room, I’m sure she...sorted through her things before leaving for Seattle. The rest is probably packed in these boxes.”
I could see that there were boxes stacked in the corner near the closet. The rest of the room looked like it hasn’t been touched in years. Daniel asked “Sean...What do you think happened to all the stuff in my room? When we left...” Sean says with sadness in his voice, “I don’t know, enano...I wish I could answer that.” All he says is “Okay...”
I see Daniel picks up a book and goes to sit down in the armchair in the far corner. From the doorway, I say “Okay, you guys seen everything, you wanted to see? Claire and Stephen will be home soon now.” Daniel says “Just...Five more minutes.” He sets the book down and starts looking at the other items in the room.
Daniel asks “Sean...Are you really mad at mom for leaving us with dad?” I know it’s a topic he doesn’t like to talk about. For Daniel’s sake, he says “It’s a bit more complicated than that, man...” Sean picks up a teddy bear that is sitting on the dresser. He shows it to me. I smile and say “Cute.”
Sean says “Hey Daniel, check this out. His name is Ulysses.” He asks “Like...the hero?!” Sean says “I guess.” He says “So cool!” Daniel takes the teddy bear and sits on the ground, “Hi Ulysses! So...You were a friend of my mommy’s? I hope she took good care of you. Did she take you with her when she went on trips? I wonder why mom loved it so much. You’re not that fluffy anymore, little bear...”
Underneath Ulysses there was a folded piece of paper. Sean picks it up and examines it. He asks “Why would Claire lock these up in here?” He goes and sits on the bed. Daniel sets the teddy bear down and follows.
Curiously, Daniel asks “Is that from mom? Huh? Let me see...” as he tries to grab the piece of paper. Sean blocks him, “Daniel...Come on...” As he tries to grab the paper again, “What’s it say? Read it!” Sean blocks him again, “Seriously, stop!” He moves the paper slightly so Daniel can read it. Daniel begins to read, “I’ve heard the news about Seattle. Please help my boys and their friend if they come to you...” I walk into the room further as he reads the letter.
He asks “What? Why did they hide this from us?” Unsure, Sean says “I don’t know...” Daniel continues “You can reach me at this address, it’s a PO Box I use sometimes.” He looks back and forth between Sean and I. Asking no one in particular, “What’s a PO Box?” Sounding disapproved, Sean tells him “Well, a cop out...in this case...” Daniel finishes reading the letter, “I...beg you...please...help my sons.”
“Oh yeah, right...Total bullshit.” Sean says a little angry. “What do you mean? She cares about us!” Daniel says. He says “Well...I don’t...” Trying to sound hopeful, Daniel says “Maybe she...changed her mind! We could try and contact her!”
He says “You don’t even know her, okay?! Don’t get any wrong ideas. We should just...stick to our plan. For now...” Daniel asks “Can I read it again...?” Handing the letter to him, Sean says “Yeah...Then we gotta go...”
Distracted by the letter, we never heard Claire and Stephen coming up the stairs. We knew they were there when Claire says, shocked “My goodness. What happened...?” I say “Shit!” She asks “Excuse me, what are you three doing in here?! Except, visibly...ransacking our house while we’re at church?” Sean and Daniel stand up from the bed with the letter in hand.
I try to explain “Claire...We’re sorry...But we just wanted to - -“ Sean interrupts “We were just looking...for answers...and...uh...” Looking at the door, Claire asks “Were they really worth breaking my door open?!” Calmly, Stephen says “Claire, please. Calm down...” She tells him “No Stephen! They went way out of line here!” She turns back to us, “We specifically told you to stay out of this room!”
Daniel tells her “Uh...I just wanted to see my mom’s stuff!” Claire tells him “This isn’t her room anymore! There is nothing to see in here! It’s time you learn to respect some rules!”
“What’s the problem, then? If there’s nothing to see, why lock us out? Or get mad? It’s like you’re in denial...I know that mom left us...and yeah, it made me mad...but at least we moved on...” Sean says, angrily. Pointing a finger at him, she says “Don’t you dare lecture me, Sean. You don’t know anything about how I feel!” She grabs the letter from his hand, “One letter doesn’t change what she did to me...all of us! She is not welcome back.”
Sean tells her “Just don’t blame us...for being curious about her...” Claire says “But I know her better than anybody! She hasn’t changed! She just feels guilty!” “I can’t hear that.” Stephen says. He then leaves the room.
She was going to go after him but turns back to Sean, “Listen, Sean...I know life has been tough on you the past month...Bless your souls. And...and we put up with a lot of things...But...that...Breaking our door to sneak in the room...That shows you don’t respect us. Then act like I’m the bad guy! After what we’ve done for you! I knew something like this might happen...maybe you three staying here wasn’t such a good idea...” I thought After all you have done for us. We appreciate it but they just want answers.
Having a realization, Sean says “Man! I think I see why mom left now...She couldn’t put up with your stupid rules anymore!” Claire says “Oh...So that’s what you think? Then let me tell you something - -“
There was a loud thump and then Stephen’s screams could be heard from downstairs. Claire yells “STEPHEN!”
We hurry down the stairs to his workshop and find him trapped beneath a cupboard. Frightened, I say “Oh, shit!” Stephen shouts “Get...this...god damn thing off me!” In terror, Claire says “Stephen! No! Hold on, honey! We’ll get it off...” The four of us try and lift it. He says in pain, “NO...stop! My legs!”
Daniel steps back away from the cupboard. I was still trying to think of ways to get Stephen out. Sean must have given him a signal because he yells, “Do it, Daniel! Now!” She asks, confused “Do what? What’s going on? Oh, Lord! What...What are you doing, Daniel?”
Claire and I step out of the way. Daniel holds his hand out and concentrates on the cupboard. The cupboard begins to lift just enough for Sean to pull Stephen out. Daniel falls to the floor in exhaustion. I catch him just before he hits the floor.
She rushes to Stephen’s side, “Oh, my baby...Stephen, are you okay?” Exhausted, Stephen says “Now I am...Thanks to Daniel...You were right, Claire. I should have fixed that cupboard months ago. I guess my laziness will get me someday...” Bewildered, Claire says “What in the name of God was that all about? That’s impossible...What are you, Daniel?” Sean says “Claire...Listen...” Stephen says “They saved me, Claire. That’s all that matters...” Finally accepting what happened, she says “Maybe...It was a miracle...Thank you, Lord...”
All of a sudden the doorbell rings. Claire stands up and looks out the window. She says “It’s the sheriff...” Muffled, the sheriff says “Stephen? Claire?” Claire says “I didn’t...” The sheriff says “It’s about your grandsons and their friend.” She says “We didn’t call them.” Sean tells her “I know, grandma...” It was the first time, I ever heard him call her that since we arrived.
The sheriff tells them “They were spotted at the Christmas market, earlier today...” Still standing close to me, Daniel asks “What are we gonna do?” Stephen says “Go hide in the garage!” Sean says “No...No! No way!” I add “If the police search the house, that makes the two of you accomplices.” She tells us “Get your bags and go out the back door...I will distract him...” I ask “Really?” Stephen says “Yes. Now...”
The sheriff asks again “Stephen?” He says “Get the hell out of here!” The sheriff says “I know you’re in here, your car is in the driveway...” Sounding very caring, Claire says “I’m so sorry...For everything...I wish we could have helped you more...I wish you could stay here with us...Watch out for Daniel.” I tell them “Thanks for helping us...Both of you...” She tells us “Oh, we love you. Now hurry up!”
The three of us sneak into the hallway. Sean says “(Y/N), Daniel, wait for me while I go upstairs and grab our bags!” He runs upstairs. Daniel and I crouch as we run to the back. We hear Claire slightly open the front door and begin talking to the sheriff. Daniel and I have our winter gear on when Sean joins us with our backpacks in hand. Daniel and I throw our backpacks on. I open the back door and quietly say ���Hurry!” Sean says “Move your ass, bro...Shit!”
We are in the backyard. We see another cop car pull up. I look around and decide the Eriksen’s yard. I tell them “This way!” We run towards their yard and climb the fence.
We run to the front yard of the Eriksen’s house. We are stopped in our tracks when a third cop car pulls up. We hold for a second and wait. The cop car put on its siren and pulls back out in our direction. All of a sudden Chris runs out into the middle of the road. He holds out his hand. Daniel yells “Chris!”
Daniel then thrusts his hand out and throws the cop car off the road into a tree. Chris turns to face us and is disappointed at the sight. Sean and I pull Daniel away. We run off in the opposite direction.
We came to a clearing up on top of a hill overlooking railroad tracks. We take a rest on a rock.
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davidmann95 · 5 years
Note
Finally, Crisis on Infinite Earths?
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Let’s dispense with any pretense right up front: CW’s Crisis on Infinite Earths is thoroughly dopey, punishingly cheap, and unselfconciously corny in the most heavy-handed ways. It is also, similarly in the spirit of wanting to be direct, probably my favorite live-action DC thing other than The Dark Knight. It’s pure, uncut, unapologetic dork superhero joy injected right into the jugular, every single ambition that a primetime network television soap/procedural/mini-MCU homunculus adaptation of the biggest comic book event of all time could have ever conceivably achieved and far beyond. Not in question that I substantially prefer it to the source material, and it’s if nothing else worth regarding as the singular achievement that it is and will remain: when the movies get around to a Crisis someday, the shared ongoing TV/cinematic universe paradigm means there aren’t going to be fistfuls of actors from past interpretations to draw from the way this could for much longer. This was in all likelihood the one shot to do this in the way everyone wanted it to be done, and it held together.
Not that much in the way of deep analysis to offer, and I already discussed the first three episodes, so let’s just get into it:
* Malthus! Low on the totem pole of shock DCU minutia, but I was mighty pleased.
* Not nor have I ever been much of a shipper, but “Do you trust me?” “With every cell in my body.” is the gayest thing I have ever seen, my lord.
* Literally everything with Lex in here is solid shining gold.
* For all the elements I had assumed were givens that didn’t happen - not that I was bothered by much of it other than I really do wish Danny Trejo had been here - Ezra Miller putting his money where his mouth is was in my dang joke category of stuff that was obviously never going to happen. What an absolute delight, and moreover I had thought in the first place “This scene really feels deliberately structured such that it would fit as a scene in the Flash movie, especially given this is where this version has the idea for the name? But that seems so unlikely!” and then Guggenheim confirmed that the CEO of WB specifically asked for that scene to be included, so I guess the Flash movie is going to be a covert sequel/companion piece to the friggin’ CW Crisis! Even if Gustin’s possibly only in the one bit though, I do hope this means Tom Cavanaghhas at least a cameo.
* The killer dumb as hell line aside, Oliver vs. the Anti-Monitor was conspicuously the best special effect in the whole thing, they clearly blew a lot of the budget on that.
* Wolfman got to be the one to tell them the Earths had been merged! And kudos to him co-writing the Arrow episode, which was probably the best of the lot from a pure storytelling/dramatic standpoint; when I say this was leaps and bounds better than the original Crisis, that’s not a knock on him.
* BEEBO. And Sargon the Sorcerer! But BEEBO. Hopefully him appearing at the height of all this and being a thing the non-Legends have to deal with is a sign of the weirdness continuing to be upped across the board.
* The final plan to defeat the Anti-Monitor is the most beautiful Silver Age nonsense, to the point that I’m fine with the last battle basically being in a Vancouver back alley the way I’d said they’d written themselves out of being able to do a year ago. And while there’s an argument to be made that from an in-universe perspective it should have been Flash to deal the final blow given this has been built up on his show since day one, it feels right that Supergirl as his biggest classic casualty scored the win. Either way, the idea of a teeny-tiny Anti-Monitor bein’ all grumpy in the Microverse for all eternity is a delight. Apparently some complained that he was a boring stock villain in this, but folks, I got some bad news about what they’re drawing from.
* Heat Wave is living his best life and we should all be so blessed.
* Given his backseat role as essentially the most important of the non-central characters, all I was truly rooting for with Hoechlin’s Superman in terms of strutting his super-stuff was getting one good hit in against the Anti-Monitor, and then it turned out he was one of the only three (or four if you count Oliver) who did out of the 50+ or so superheroes in total here, so I was a happy camper. And itty-bitty Superman was funny right away, but even funnier when I realized that was basically making Hoechlin an Atom to go with Routh’s Superman. Can’t wait for the show.
* I assume that as I’ve seen others suggest Earth-12 is meant to be the HBO Green Lantern series and they simply used the related footage they had available, but that movie of all movies therefore getting a shout-out in here is both hysterical and somehow perfect: everything has its place.
* Routh lives, in what might be a brighter rewritten timeline! This could easily be his sendoff and it’d be a perfect one, but I’d of course be more than pleased for him to fill a Kal-L role in Superman & Lois.
* “The first of our heroes”? Did Green Arrow precede Superman, which would be a change in at least one of their timelines? Wasn’t Black Lightning a hero awhile back? Or is this just in the sense of him being the first public human hero? The real answer is that it’s an acknowledgment of his real-world role as the guy who kicked all this off and the logistics don’t matter.
* Justice League! Justice League! Justice League!
youtube
* Wonder what the next crossover’s going to be? Easy answers would be something with Superman in the lead now that he’ll be fully in the fold (I understand the 90s crossover Panic in the Sky! was meant for much the same purpose of positioning him as a leader in-universe), or a Dark Nights: Metal adaptation with Batwoman center stage, but the producers have been adamant that the next entry will be something smaller. Maybe a set of mini-crossovers of two or three shows in blocks, or a subplot building across multiple shows that culminates in one or two big episodes with the League banding together. I’d love for their first adventure as a formal team to be fighting Starro (he could emerge as a Lovecraftian threat ala how Morrison treated him in JLA, only for J’onn to link them up to his mind and he turns out to be the hilarious doofus bully from Metal, but the first big crossover was already an alien invasion that involved a bunch of superheroes being mind-controlled, so there is the concern that it could come off as redundant. I’m still in favor of it though, as it could get us a live-action Jarro.
So there we go, there was a live-action Crisis on Infinite Earths. Whereas its source was dopey junk food in service of tearing down a lot of cool stuff, this was dopey junk food in service of delivering and setting up more cool stuff to come, so I’ll stand by this being the better of the two. What a start to the decade; I grew up with 2020 as The Year Of The Future in the same way I know many did with 2000, and nothing could be more of a signifier that we live in a changed world as far as superheroes’ place in mass-media from when I was a kid than this.
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lesbicattiva · 5 years
Text
araki’s interview at luccacomics&games 2019 part two.
loose & imperfect transcript / translation of araki first interview (30th oct 2PM) at lucca comics & games 2019 at teatro del giglio about his main work: jojo’s bizarre adventures. (talk show translated from italian to english 2/5).
A: Good evening. Q: Good evening. Since we’re here to talk about it, I’d like to ask: how was JOJO’s Bizarre Adventure born? A: [ignores the question just to properly repeat ‘good evening’ again and then point at cosplayers] I think I recognize that character! Maybe I saw it on japanese tv! Q: [stammers] Uh.... my question? A: Oh right [laughs]. The idea of JOJO came because I wanted to draw characters with superpowers that can’t be seen. I wanted to draw that and shape those powers on paper. I did it on shōnen jump, where I debuted, and just tried to pick a name that could be easily remembered, something like with a double J and a double O.
Q: Continuing with the foundations of JOJO, as I was saying earlier, there’s a common theme in this year’s lucca comics and JOJO; the focus on ‘humanity’, its tight bond with ‘fate’ and the ‘immortality of the human spirit’. I’d like to know why these themes have been chosen and why you like them so much. A: Actually, it’s because I’ve been told to draw something like this, and so I did it [editor of JOJO laughs]. But only after drawing it I realized that “wow, I drew something really interesting!” a theme so deep such as ‘admiration for human beings’ and so on. It’s really a serious thing [him, the translator and the two editors laugh] but yeah, I only realized it later because at first I’d just been told to draw [head-editor of ultra jump speaks to araki and he nods]. Well, yes, actually this was the short version of the story, the longer one is that I actually wanted to draw the theme of the ‘affirmation of humans’, of ‘not rejecting your humanity’. And because of this there are ‘good’ characters, which are obviously appreciated, but even ‘evil’ characters have something that can be appreciated since they are human beings. And this was more or less the idea for JOJO’s theme. I gave a bit of a superficial answer at first but now it’s a good answer, isn’t it? [everyone laughs]
Q: Let’s remain on the theme of fate, of destiny, of how we humans are destined, or damned, if you will, to follow a certain path. In JOJO there isn't just the protagonists’ family, which moves from location to location, but there’s also another family.... the Zeppeli [audience laughs]. It’s good to see you guys taking it that way because they really.... don’t. Since, as you can hear, I’m from Napoli, I’m rather curious if their fate will always be the same or if they’ll be able to take control of it someday. A: I don’t mean to ‘persecute’ them, but they are complementary to the Joestar family. Them ending up dying serves to complete the flow of the story and to facilitate the path of the Joestars. Q: But do you see a possibility for them in the future.... I really care about them, you see. A: I’m glad that you’re a big fan of the Zeppeli as I am. But I think that the beauty of their family is in the very fact that, yes they will die, but they will also pass on those values and positive qualities through their deaths. The very act of dying for them allows that. Don’t you think too? Q: Yes. I too.... can’t wait to die. [audience laughs and so does araki, but he’s still a little concerned]
Q: In JOJO, compared to other mangas where characters fight, you made a precise choice; that is, the absence of a direct clash. You opted for a more studied, strategic way of fighting, almost like a chess match. And the cornerstones of that are stands. How do you manage to always find new powers and tactics? A: Having new ideas is my job. I get inspired by many things, especially during my everyday life: when I meet my friends or I see them do particular gestures, when I talk with my old neighbour or when I drink a glass of water and some gets stuck in my throat; then I think “hey! I could make a stand power out of that!”. Basically, I think observing little details is essential to my creative process.
Q: Many of the stories of JOJO are real travel diaries, since a huge variety of settings is present. How much the setting influences the writing and how fundamental is it? Do you start from there to create the story or is it just a plus?  A: I was very inspired by the small trips I did when young. As a kid I would bike to various places, I’d climb up mountains, go around other cities.... This travelling process helped me a lot in my growth – from kid to adult, so for me the philosophy of a journey is very important because it allows the characters who partake in it to evolve and become adults, from the beginning to the end of the journey. As for the other part of the question, thinking about the creative process of the manga for more contained locations.... For example, if you stopped to camp during a trip and encountered one of your fears, you would have to face it directly. But I asked myself what would happen if that fear, that enemy, is the one hiding instead; maybe even in the apartment next to you. From this idea the setting of Morio-cho was born, to have an invisible enemy, a peaceful person who just waits silently somewhere in the background. This has been a different challenge compared to what I previously tackled regarding the process of a journey.
Q: Speaking of Morio-cho, would you like to live in this town you created? A: Yes. I’ve answered your question right away because it’s based on the town where I grew up, near Sendai, it was full of weird people [audience laughs] – well, they were all good people but [laughs a bit] still some were weird. Q: I see. I’m sure there were some Zeppelis there as well.
Q: Again, speaking of the creative process, it’s common knowledge that you listen to a lot of music while working. It’s also an interesting concept, since rhythm is essential to storytelling. How much music, and what type, influences your work? A: What influences me the most is the rhythm, and you can probably see it in the onomatopoeias that I use, which can go like [makes an index gesture] ‘tan-tan-pa’. They are all different types of rhythms that I listen to while writing, this of course influences my creative process as well.
Q: Okay. This is my last question, then I’ll leave the rest to fans. What will the future of JOJO be? A: I don’t know [laughs]. (note: translator suggests he might know but doesn’t want to reveal anything) Actually, I had a good idea of the beginning and a relatively clear idea of the end, but everything else in between is like a jazz concert: it’s a very spontaneous and in the moment creative process. But yes, the ending is pretty definite to me.
F: Hi. As we were saying, you are often inspired by ordinary things: your travels, your childhood, music.... In Diamond Is Unbreakable there's a stand called Bad Company and I remember seeing something similar in a Stephen King's story. I'd like to know if you took inspiration from that and if you like horror movies in general, and if they influence you in any way. (note: people say this guy was rude) A: No, I didn't know there was a story like that. But yes, I do like Stephen King. I enjoyed The Twilight Zone and I'm definitely influenced by horror for my work but I prefer movies like Chucky or Child's Play. I really love horror movies though. 
F: Hi. I read online that the ending and opening songs for the anime are personally chosen by you. I'd like to know if there's an italian song that you like and maybe would use as an ending for the anime. A: An italian song? Mhh. I really like PFM. Was it Premiata? Premiata? [audience claps loudly and araki smiles] Premiata Forneria Marconi, that's it! I didn't decide it just now, I really do like it! [laughs] I also love Puccini's opera.
F: Hello. We know that clothes are one of the main characteristics of JOJO and that many are also inspired by famous brands, I'd like to know, then, what's the creative process behind the creation of those outfits. A: A thing that all of my clothes have in common is that they are comfortable and facilitate movement. In particular, for the protagonists, I always base myself on the model of a classic japanese student uniform, on which I then add other features, like ladybugs brooches or more fancy accessories. But the start is always the school uniform. When I was young I really liked “Babil Junior”, a manga where the protagonist wears a school uniform while in the desert. I found that truly beautiful and it inspired me a lot. To be able to draw these characters in school uniforms and have them go around desolate locations.... It really touched me and even made me cry a bit.
Q: While I search for the next person can I ask another quick question of my own? If you could choose your stand, what would it be? A: Judging by the weather here in Lucca, which has been pretty gloomy today, I’d say that I’d like the stand power of a ‘hare-otoko’ / 晴れ男 (lit. a man that brings good weather). In fact, forecasts said that it would rain a lot today, but since I’m here, thanks to me, there’s good weather [laughs]. (note: believe it or not, it always rains during lucca comics, but for the hours that araki was there, the weather was good. as soon as he finished his talk show, it started raining heavily. he really has a powerful stand.)
F: Hi. A straightforward question: since today's theme is ‘becoming human’ don't you think that Diavolo's punishment was a bit too much? (note: people say this guy was also rude) A: Oh, sorry, you don’t like his punishment? [laughs] I think he was such an evil character that he deserved to end like that. I’ve been told that his death was too harsh by japanese fans as well, however.... I think it was fitting for someone as evil as him. Sorry.
Q: Since time is almost up, allow me to ask the last questions. Is there a character that you think looks like you or just one that you can easily identify with? A: Rohan— [audience interrupts him by cheering loudly] NO NO NO [araki and the translator laugh]. I was saying that Rohan is who I aspire to be but it’s not who I am, sorry [araki and the translator laugh again]. There isn’t a character that I can really identify with but my favourite is Shigechi. [audience is kinda surprised] I like it when he collects the money that fell on the ground.
Q: Looking in hindsight at the work you’ve done on JOJO so far, is there any anecdotes that you’d like to share with us here today? A: I don’t know if it’s interesting but when I was writing for weekly shōnen jump the deadline was set to 19 pages of work each week. But every single time I just couldn’t limit myself to only 19 and always ended up doing 21. Like this, 2 pages were always going to be cut out. They wouldn’t even go in the next chapter because they were part of the current one and thus had to be cut out completely. Currently I’m very satisfied because I have 45 pages to work with in ultra jump. Although, actually, maybe now they’re a bit too many [everyone laughs].
Q: The last thing that I’ll ask you before saying goodbye is: if you could go back to the very first day in which you sat down at your desk and started working on JOJO, is there something that you would do differently? A: I would change the printing mistakes, for example ‘nani o suru da’ / 何をするだァーッ would often be written incorrectly as ‘nani o surun da’ / 何をするんだァーッ (where んだ got added) [laughs and jokingly blames the editor of JOJO, who takes responsibility. even though the editor wasn’t able to correct them at the time he still feels it was his responsibility nonetheless]. But yes, in the end, I would change little things like this, because in the first volumes there were many mistakes like this.
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figmentforms · 6 years
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Loooong overdue Q&A,and Announcements!
Lots of the questions are from many many months ago. Sorry about that! I’m super behind on everything because my life got so crazy for a while there and I’m still catching up! If interested in details about my life, I wrote more in depth about it at the bottom of this post!
Announcements:
❄ Comic updates should start to be weekly again now that things are finally settling down in my life! :D
❄ I found some copies of my comics to sell! If interested in a printed copy of AToTR Volume 1 or Volume 2, Check out my Etsy store here! https://www.etsy.com/shop/GildedPixel
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***From the last round of comic selling, a few got sent back to me because something went wrong with the address. Unfortunately i have no idea who didn’t get theirs because of the aforementioned chaos. If you still haven’t gotten your order from like... half a year ago, please just let me know and I’ll send you your order again.
❄ Apparently tumblr is having some uh… “serious technical difficulties”. If it goes belly up, all my comics are free to see on my Patreon. Only the newest comic each week is locked for only patrons to view, but it unlocks when the next one comes out each week. https://www.patreon.com/LorIllustration
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❄ A new update to the Youtube dub of my comic is up on Starbot Dubs!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ZuLjHvERxA
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If you haven’t see the previous 5 parts, they’re all here as one video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTAEM9PFPVY
And Now for Q&A!!!
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I am so grateful for this letter and for the many other letters of support I was sent over the past couple months. It really helped me get through the low times and I’ll always appreciate it that you and many others took the time to send me words of encouragement, empathy, and advice. Thank you so much! 
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Thank you! AND I WOULD BE SO HONORED PLEASE DO!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D
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Thank you! My best advice for anatomy would be to focus on two things: look  online for skeletal and muscle anatomy illustrations. Knowing the hardware under the skin helps SO much! Also do lots of life drawings. Draw anyone willing to sit still long enough for you! The more you do it, the easier it will get and the more you will develop your own style!
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For the most part, I draw around the word bubbles! Then the next priority is to draw what needs to be shown to communicate the point of the panels. Usually in the super early stages it’s just characters that are sketched in, but sometimes elements of the setting are just as important, like a doorway or establishing the setting for a new scene! I hope that helps!
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LOL she would be SO tempted, but wouldn’t resort to anything like that unless it was over something extremely important that also happened to be an emergency. Ganondorf however would have no problem with it because he has a different, much more Direct, style of governing. XD
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Rinku is indeed Link!
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Absolutely the second one. XD
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TaDaaa!!!! XD
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Super good question! For the most part all the rooms are just laid out as I need them to communicate a comic clearly. The exception is if I already have drawn a room, I try to keep it the same. The throne room, Specific bedrooms, ect. But I don’t have a castle layout set in stone or anything. lol I will eventually have to do that at some point though.
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I strongly considered having this be a story arc at one point but it got dropped! Short answer is, Yes. He would eventually try to do that. But would find that Impa had already secretly killed him years ago and never told Zelda.
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Oh he totally does that all the time!!!  Just not important to the story so it’s not shown!
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YUP!!! XD
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Someday, totally, but I haven’t even caught up with the ones I started last spring!!! *I suddenly experience a mighty wave of shame*
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Awww! That’s a really sweet idea!!!! She would totally take his name and he would be so darn proud!
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Oh HECK YEAH!!!!
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Possibly! But if so, it will be in the next reincarnation arc!
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At a later point, I think! if I have time to develop it and not stagnate the story too terribly much!
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Thank you! And Tingle? At some point, YES. Mask salesman? Not sure yet! maybe!
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That's beautiful!!! Was it a fic??? That’s an incredibly cool idea!
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That’s adorable. Eventually they would have to dance together at a royal ball. Ganondorf is a bit more graceful than Zelda, but they would manage. Would be cute as heck too because Zelda would be a little shy and Ganondorf would urge her to be more confident... and maybe rile up her competitive nature by saying he’s better at it than her.
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Update on my life!
Leaving my old life and my ex last August was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but it was the right choice and I’m so much happier now. Things are finally getting stable now! I was only planning to stay with my aunt Jan in Ohio for a short while, but she recently got some serious health problems so I’ll be staying with her for several months more to help take care of her. And even though I wasn’t looking for a new relationship so soon after leaving my troubled marriage, I randomly met someone a few weeks ago that just amazed me with how universally kind he is and with how much we have in common! His name is Mark and he works as an army nurse with a forward surgical team attached to a special operations joint task force. He just got deployed to Afghanistan to go and patch people up, and if all goes well he will be back home in late summer. I never thought soul mates were really a thing, but if they are, I think he’s mine! As for my dog Oscar, he’s continued to grow and be a happy giant puppy! He’s going to be a full year old at the end of December! He’s almost 60 pounds now!!!
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On the less than great side, I’ve had no luck finding an art-related job, so I’m going to be switching my career goals over to becoming an art teacher. But honestly, I think teaching will be a much more emotionally fulfilling career, so even though that wasn’t my original plan, I’m excited to start to chase that new dream!
Thank you all so much for your continued kindness and support for both for my work and for me as a human. You all are a big part of why I had the confidence and self worth to leave a bad situation and I will always be grateful to you all for that. Thank you for helping me reach this new better life! 
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mia-cooper · 5 years
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Fanfiction Questions
from here
Fandom Questions
1. What was the first fandom you got involved in?
Involved as in ‘frantically read every book I could get my hands on, daydreamed about being part of that universe and wrote stories/made art inspired by the books, if not actual fanfiction’? Mm, probably The Chronicles of Narnia when I was six or seven. The next great obsession was The Silver Brumby when I went through my horse stage around age 12, and then Sweet Valley High when I was 15. Hahaha.
2. What is your latest fandom?
Marvel! I’m not into comics and I’m definitely not interested in consuming every last bit of canon material or memorising the variations of every universe, but I love (most of) the movies and Agents of SHIELD is pretty cool.
3. What is the best fandom you’ve ever been involved in?
Star Trek Voyager. No contest. I venture to suggest that the older fandoms, the ones that are all about defunct shows, are a hell of a lot more chilled. Maybe because we’ve come to terms with our shitty canon endings and learned that liking the ship you hate doesn’t make someone problematic, unlike some newer fandoms I could name (Yes I’m talking about you, Game of Thrones fans. What the fuck.)
4. Do you regret getting involved in any fandoms?
I’ve dipped a toe into one or two fandoms for shows or books I’ve really enjoyed and backed the fuck out when the vibe gets weird (oh hey, it’s GoT again), but nope. No regrets.
5. Which fandoms have you written fanfiction for?
All the Star Treks except TOS, and a Trek/MCU crossover. I’d like to write more for MCU someday. Plus I’ve written longhand entire notebooks full of teen romance shit that bore an uncanny similarity to SVH, and my first short story was a fantasy fic that featured a girl whose guardian was a wise talking lion who led her into mystical secret worlds, which is kind of familiar.
6. List your OTP from each fandom you’ve been involved in.
Wow. I’m going to define ‘involved in’ as ‘cared enough about to have an OTP’, but I’m guaranteed to forget a ton. In no particular order:
Voyager: Janeway x anyone who can get her off
Discovery: Lorca x Cornwell or Pike x Tyler x Burnham (or any combination of)
DS9: Kira x Jadzia Dax
TNG: Picard x Vash, I guess? I don’t really have any TNG ships
ENT: T’Pol x Trip x Hoshi (or any variation therein)
MCU: Cap x Widow
AoS: Coulson x Skye... no May... no Skye... I don’t know
CAOS: Madam Satan x Zelda
Timeless: Garcy
The Good Place: Eleanor x Tahani
The 100 (shut up): toss up between Clarke x Bellamy and Kane x Abby
Veronica Mars: Veronica x Leo (first run), Veronica x Logan (s4)
Orphan Black: Cosima x Delphine
BSG: Apollo x Starbuck
SG1: Sam x Jack
Arrow: Olicity (so over the show now though)
This Life: Milly x Egg
Yeah you know what... I’m drawing a blank. I can’t think of any other shows where I’ve been invested in The Romance that much.
7. List your NoTPs from each fandom you’ve been in.
I’m too tired to do every fandom, and besides, I can come around to almost any ship if the headcanons (or fics) are convincing enough. I do have a few hard no-gos, but they might be someone else’s OTP so I’ll shut up about them.
8. How did you get involved in your latest fandom?
Reluctantly. The MCU movies are not something I ever thought I’d enjoy beyond a dull evening’s entertainment. I never expected to get attached to the characters. And yet.
9. What are the best things about your current fandom?
Voyager is my forever fandom and the only one where I’ve really interacted with other fans. The best things about it? In general, everyone is just cool, accepting, open and basically awesome. And talented. I love my Party Bus people.
10.  Is there a fandom you read fic from but don’t write in?
Sure. The 100, Veronica Mars and Agents of SHIELD are the ones I’d dip into more frequently. I really enjoy crossovers between Trek and BSG or the Stargate variants, too.
Ship Questions for your Current Fandom
11. Who is your current OTP?
Janeway x Chakotay.
12. Who is your current OT3?
Janeway x Chakotay x Paris.
13. Any NoTPs?
A few.
14. Go on, who are your BroTPs?
Janeway & Tuvok! Also Torres & Chakotay, and I’d have killed for more Janeway & Torres in canon. (If they kissed sometimes that would be okay too)
15. Is there an obscure ship which you love?
Yeah. Paris x Seven. There are like two fics in existence, and yet ... the potential! (Sorry, B’Elanna)
16. Are there any popular ships in your fandom which you dislike?
Nope.
17. Who was your first OTP and are they still your favourite?
Janeway x Paris. And they’re still way up there, but not quite at the top.
18. What ship have you written the most about?
84% of my fics feature Janeway x Chakotay as either the primary or secondary pairing... holy shit.
19. Is there a ship which you wished you could get behind, but you just don’t feel them?
Paris x Torres. I mean, I feel them. I just don’t generally feel the need to write about them.
20. Any ships which you surprised yourself by liking?
Chakotay x Seven. In another universe, it could’ve been beautiful.
Author Questions
21. What was the first fanfic you ever wrote?
Actual story that was clearly fanfic? A farcical drunken romp told in the 24th century equivalent of email format called PADDemonium (see what I did there?)
22. Is there anything you regret writing?
Lol, a few things that should probably have never seen the light of day for various reasons, some of them leola related. But I’ve only deleted two fics that I can recall.
23. Name a fic you’ve written that you’re especially fond of & explain why you like it.
Relieved. It’s a 30k AU Chakotay moral dilemma backstory that brings in DS9 characters, Section 31 and his longstanding history with AU Janeway. I did so much research for it (way back in the days before memory alpha and chakoteya.net) and I’m really proud of how I wound in canon stuff across series but changed a few key bits and pieces. Only problem is, it’s a sequel to ...
24. What fic do you desperately need to rewrite or edit?
... Pressure, which I can’t even read without cringing. My characterisation of Janeway, even Angry Maquis AU Janeway, is way over the top and there are moments that verge on Mills and Boon and give me first, second and third hand embarrassment. God, I’d love to rewrite it. Actually, that’s a lie. I want someone else to rewrite it so I can read it without covering my eyes and moaning.
25. What’s your most popular fanfic?
Desperate Measures, by about 70,000 light years, lol. Although Fragile Things beats it on bookmarks.
26. How do you come up with your fanfic titles?
You know what? A fair percentage of the time, I think of the title first and come up with a plot second. Aside from that, I prefer shorter, punchier titles that clearly tie into the story (Flight Risk, Speechless), though sometimes it’s song lyrics (Burn Our Horizons, your body like a searchlight) or a literary quote (Required to Bear, All the Devils are Here) or a turn of phrase from the story itself (The Prisons You Inhabit). Hey that was fun. Thanks for letting me pimp the shit out of my stories.
27. What do you hate more: Coming up with titles or writing summaries?
Ugh, it depends on the day. Summaries are harder, I think. I never want to give away too much of the plot, but there has to be enough there for people to know whether they’ll bother clicking. Funny story: I actually ran the stats on this a few months back. Here they are for your edification:
Fics with a one line plot summary = 54%
With two or three line plot summary = 18%
With a short snippet directly from the fic = 16%
With a snippet + a one line explanation = 3%
With a one line plot summary plus a line to date the fic (eg "set in season 3", “episode tag to Worst Case Scenario") or the fic prompt = 7%
And finally, a quote from something other than the fic = 2% (that's only 3 fics).
28. If someone were to draw a piece of fanart for your story, which story would it be and what would the picture be of?
Ooh. I’ll say the final scene in Explosive.
29. Do you have a beta reader? Why/Why not?
I used to regularly ask @jhelenoftrek​ and @littleobsessions90 to beta for me, and both of them are brilliant at it. Lately I’ve been posting without sending my stuff off for editing. This is partly because I’m impatient to get stuff out there, partly because I don’t have as much time to write/edit, and partly because I’m a little less focused on improving my writing and more on enjoying it for its own sake.
30. What inspires you to write?
Little bits of episode dialogue I haven’t noticed before, other people’s fanfiction, stray conversations, fic prompts, song lyrics, random headcanons, fever dreams, dares ...
31. What’s the nicest thing someone has ever said about your writing?
I’ve been really lucky with comments on my fic. The least helpful comment I’ve ever received was on one of my early 30k fics and all it said was “Did you have to take the name of the lord in vain?” Which is kind of funny. The nicest thing anyone’s ever said? I’m very partial to the feedback that starts “I don’t even like this pairing/genre/trope/show but you made me love it”, and particularly “I’ll read anything you write, I don’t care what it’s about.” But all comments are gold. The little heart button is cool too.
32. Do you listen to music when you write or does music inspire you? If so, which band or genre of music does it for you?
I’m not someone who can tune out music I love, or leave it in the background to inspire me. If it’s on, I’m fully invested in it. I’m that annoying person in the car who flips radio stations every three seconds until I find something I like and then it’s on 11 and I’m singing along to it. I’m also really picky but extremely eclectic, although there are genres I can’t stand (anything with autotune makes me stabby). That said, sometimes I find a song that I can’t stop listening to for weeks and often that perfect combination of music and lyrics will inspire me to write a fic. For example, I just plotted out an entire J/C story because of this song.
33. Do you write oneshots, multi-chapter fics or huuuuuge epics?
All of the above. Although I’m not sure if my longest epic is huuuuuge or just huuuge.
34. What’s the word count on your longest fic?
101,467.
35. Do you write drabbles? If so, what do you normally write them about?
I have two drabble collections. One is all J/C, full of responses to random prompts and I add to it sporadically. The other is episode additions set on Kathryn Janeway’s birthday (May 20) and added to annually.
36. What’s your favourite genre to write?
Angst, definitely. Sometimes it’s smutty angst or fluffy angst or hurt/comfort angst, but often it’s just fucking unrelenting angst. And I’m okay with that.
37. First person or third person - what do you write in and why?
I did the stats on this once, too, haha. Pretty sure I came out fairly even on first and third person with a smattering of second person in there. I’m probably even-ish on present vs past tense, too. I make it a point to mix it up to avoid my writing getting stale or same-y. And sometimes a fic doesn’t really click for me until I try it in a different POV or tense or from a different character’s perspective.
38. Do you use established canon characters or do you create OCs?
I mostly write for canon characters - the fun is in all the different ways you can interpret and imagine them - but I’ve been known to throw in the odd OC, or focus on a character who only got a brief cameo appearance, or write about someone who only appears in beta canon, or who only rates a mention on screen.
39. What is your greatest strength as a writer?
Oh, wow. I’m not sure. I guess the thing I value most about my own writing is my willingness to try different styles, characters, pairings and so on. The thing I strive for most is characterisation that feels true, and I really love it when I get comments on that. Exploring a character in a way that rings true with a reader is the best thing ever.
40. What do you struggle the most with in your writing?
Overly long sentences and adverb abuse, haha. No, truthfully, there comes a point in most of my fics, particularly the longer ones, when I really just want to scrap it because in my heart I know it’s dreadful. Usually that passes once I slog through the ‘I don’t wanna’ stage because I’m a bloody-minded bitch, but sometimes fics do get left in the dust half-written. Honestly, though, they’re the ones that probably should stay there.
Fanfiction Questions
41. List and link to 5 fanfics you are currently reading:
This is hilarious because I was just talking on discord about my problematic ‘to read’ pile. My unread AO3 subscription emails currently number 29 and my phone browser has 71 tabs open. So here are 5 random picks from that list of exactly 100 fics I should be reading:
Sex on the Beach (E, Janeway/Chakotay) by @traccigaryn​
The Ruby Ring (T, Janeway/Chakotay, Janeway/Tighe) by @trinfinity2001​
Earth is But an Idea (T, Janeway/Chakotay, Carter/O’Neill) by @caladeniablue​
Home (E, Janeway/Chakotay) by Cassatt
Wise Up (E, Janeway/Chakotay) by KimJ
42. List and link to 5 fanfiction authors who are amazing:
Only five? Shit. Okay. In no particular order, these are five of the writers I keep coming back to:
quantumsilver (also here)
northernexposure
LittleObsessions
Helen8462
Cheshire
But there are so many others. My chosen fandom is chock full of amazing talent.
43. Is there anyone in your fandom who really inspires you?
All of the authors above for various reasons, but also august because her writing is so spare and delicate and devastating, and runawaymetaphor because she writes the most delicious Janeway/Paris, and @seperis​ because I read In the Space of Seven Days literally 20 years ago and I still haven’t recovered, and I could be here all night raving on this topic but there are still many questions to get through.
44. What ship do you feel needs more attention?
Janeway x Paris. I’m so happy there’s been a little bit of a resurgence in J/P fics lately. Thanks, @curator-on-ao3​, you’re doing the lord’s work.
I’ll also take Janeway x Johnson content any day of the week.
45. What is your all time favourite fanfic?
What the hell? I can’t pick just one! Ugh!
... but okay, here’s the first one that came to mind when I tried to think about this: if you came this way by tree. I’m not sure I’d call it my favourite, but it’s one I revisit often. Ugh, there are so many other fics I’m thinking of now that I really want to list.
46. If someone was to read one of your fanfics, which fic would you recommend to them and why?
Oh, that’s hard. I should probably pick an angsty smutty J/C because that’s a fair proportion of what I write and it’s good to let a new reader know what they can expect. But honestly, I think the best fic I’ve written is The Uncharted Sea. (It’s safe for work. Maybe not for makeup.)
47. Archive Of Our Own, Fanfiction.net or Tumblr - where do you prefer to post and why?
The Archive, of course. Where else can I find ad-free hosting on a stunningly user-friendly interface with absolutely no moralising content restrictions and the world’s best tagging system? That Hugo award is well deserved.
Tumblr is good for headcanons and meta and gifsets and a few other formats that I’m less likely to post on AO3 because I’d feel like I was pissing off people who subscribe to me by giving them some random garbage.
I also have my own website, but I’m not really sure why. Sometimes I post fic there that doesn’t make it to tumblr or AO3.
48. Do you leave reviews when you read fanfiction? Why/Why not?
I try to. Honestly I do. I love it when I get reviews, so I figure paying it forward is the least I can do. I’m less scrupulous about leaving comments when I’m busy or reading on my phone.
49. Do you care if people comment/reblog your writing? Why/why not?
I mean, I love it when people reblog, but I certainly don’t expect it. @arcadia1995​ is amazing for reblogging stuff *blows kisses*
Nobody owes fanfic writers shit, but I feel like there’s a tacit agreement that if you like what you just read for free and you’re on a platform that makes it easy to do so, you leave a review or at least a kudos, because I’m not gonna lie, posting a fic you’ve worked super hard on and seeing it get very few kudos or comments is a bit deflating. I’m sure a lot of us have been there.
50. How did you get into reading and/or writing fanfiction?
During Voyager’s original run I was trawling the internet for Endgame spoilers (I don’t know why; I usually love surprises) and I guess I googled (or whatever the 2001 equivalent of googling was) something like “how does voyager get home” and somehow I stumbled across Revisionist History. At first I had no idea what I was reading - was this a lost story pitch that somehow got leaked? A professional novella commissioned by the showrunners?
Then I started following links and discovered yahoo groups and webrings and Trekiverse and fanfiction.net and all sorts of incredible things I’d never guessed at, including the now defunct ‘archipelago of angst’, a collection of Voyager writers who focused mainly on a darker Janeway than most of the other fic writers I was encountering, and I was hooked. So I wrote a few of my own pieces, and then I lost interest for 15 years. I’m still not sure how I got dragged back in.
51. Rant or Gush about one thing you love or hate in the world of fanfiction! Go!
Honestly, in what other way can I indulge my obsessions, hone my skills and talk about it endlessly with like-minded people? Where else can I instantly find a plethora of fiction about the exact topic I feel like reading about on my mobile device and for free? Fanfiction is fucking amazing and I’m so glad it exists in my life.
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kingofthewilderwest · 5 years
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What do you do most of the time when you’re not on tumblr?
Thanks for asking to get to know me!!! I do MANY things! :D 
Let’s get the “boring” thing out of the way: work! Occupationally, I work remotely as a theoretical linguistics contractor. Basically, that means I do freelance language analysis work for other companies. I sit at home in my pajamas at 2 AM listening to folk metal while doing boring repetitive language tasks for money. XD Usually, it involves me pouring through large databases of sentences and annotating pertinent information on top of the sentences, coding it according to the information another development team wants. What I input is what another team uses to improve an AI’s ability to understand English. For instance, maybe I’m going through a large corpus of sentences marking what the verb is, and how noun phrases relate to the verb (as the direct object, subject, etc.) My work helps accomplish a variety of practical uses. The reason why your search results are relevant on a website? The reason why virtual assistants like Siri are able to answer a question you ask it? That’s the stuff I work on, although I do the non-technical, non-programmy side of it, and am more or less just following instructions for what they want me to look for in the sentence databases they use to train their AIs.
I usually am held to non-disclosure agreements, so I can only say so much about what my work involves, but I have had the pleasure to partner with several collegiate universities, Amazon, the Mayo Clinic, Google, environmental research centers, local companies, and more over the years since I first began these gigs in 2012.
But like. Recreationally?
I LOVE DOING CREATIVE THINGS!!!!!!!
I’m usually running around doing three thousand eight hundred forty two and a half projects any given day. Music composition for indie films and video games; cosplay; fanfiction writing; original novel writing; learning new musical instruments (I own literally several dozen instruments…); drawing; Photoshop abuse; video game streaming; skiing; hiking; teaching myself new languages; collecting action figures and other rare fandom materials; getting distracted by cat videos; crying in feels over television shows; staring pointlessly at a wall for several hours; you name it! 
At the moment, I’m working on a fancy pants fanfiction novel for Camp NaNoWriMo - which I hope I’ll be posting online in the next few months. I’m creating/planning cosplays for Envy (FMAB), Catra (She-Ra), Rufus (Deponia), and Krel (3Below) to debut at a cosplay convention in May (assuming I get my act together, which I probably won’t, let’s be real). I’m playing Anthem with my sister and brother-in-law and am streaming video games most Wednesdays on my twitch account - also now available on YouTube btw. I’m learning how to use illustration markers and digital art tools, while trying to improve my ability drawing humans and backgrounds. I’m teaching myself 日本語. I’m working with several friends to translate a book from German to English so we can play a roleplay game together where I GM (none of us speak German… whoopsies). I’m going to be drawing illustrations for a children’s book my grandpa wrote. I’m drafting the outline for an original novel I hope to publish in the future. I’m arranging a music suite for some of the Huzzah songs for the Deponia video game series. I’m talking with several friends about movie or game projects we could make. I’m playing Dungeons and Dragons as a gunslinging True Neutral alien. I’m planning several fandom AUs with friends that might turn into comics, fanfictions, or getting lost in the dust because I have a notorious, terrible record for finishing anything. I’m skiing with friends in the mountains before winter season ends. I’m trying to collect several difficult-ish-to-find FMA materials from eBay. I’m trying desperately to avoid making an AMV for a ship I’ve fallen into, but it’s probably going to happen despite my best efforts (damn Deponia has my heart right now, okay???). I’m haranguing my irl best friends by being a loving assholish punster gremlin to them. I’m wasting lots of my hours screwing around with friends on discord. And, I haven’t had the time yet, but I just bought a ukulele, so I want to get around to learning that, too. Only so much time in a day though…. uhhhhh….
This doesn’t mean all my projects are good… I am not talented in all these respects… but that doesn’t mean I get any less enjoyment out of all these creative hobbies!
I SWEAR I’ve recently been trying to limit the number of projects I’m doing at any given time. I even made myself a checklist for activities that I “allow” myself to do so I don’t start three hundred more pointless hare chases. But yeah! That’s the current day-to-day activities of Haddock!
Actually… this conversation is a good lead-in to something I’ve been meaning to say on my blog for a while. 
It’s probably unsurprising that, given as I’m doing so much beyond tumblr, that I haven’t been spending an enormous amount of time answering analysis questions recently. My asks have begun stocking up over the last few months; though I have several hundred responses to answer and want to answer, the truth is that my life is prioritized elsewhere right now and I probably won’t get to things all that fast, if at all.
Tumblr has been an extraordinary experience for me and I’ll never like, leave-leave it behind. I’ve engaged a lot in tumblr because it’s provided me life, fandom, happiness, and a community I’ve attached to. It’s also given me hope: hope that my contribution to the fandom gives people happiness and meaning, too. Fiction is powerful for all of us and a way to give us inspiration and meaning. I hope that my engagement in fandom has helped other people feel happiness, inspiration, and meaning, too. Whenever I receive asks from people telling me kind things about my blog, I feel touched beyond words, because it makes me feel like my time on tumblr has been a benefit and a difference to other lives beyond my own, and there’s nothing better than that.
But I also admit: I’m ready to transition to New Things in life. My greatest goal in life is to make as meaningful of a difference as I can. I don’t want to breeze by my years doing nothing but recreation for myself: I want to do what I can to make a maximal difference in the lives of others for the better. Tumblr’s been fun and I hope I’ve made a good impact, but my deepest dreams and goals aren’t around tumblr analyses. They’re around creative writing, especially the wild dream to someday be a published author. I’m increasingly taking the steps and time to reach that goal. I’m done waiting; I’m done planning; I’m ready to charge forward and make this ambition reality, best as I can. 
That means that, anymore, tumblr is a hindrance to my life’s greatest dreams, and I can’t do both full-tumblr-activities and reach my heart’s deepest wishes.
I’m honestly feeling a lot happier now that I’ve drastically reduced my time on tumblr. I’m so sorry that it’s resulted in me not answering many asks (that really would be fun to talk about), and I hope no one feels like I’ve forgotten or snubbed them. I’d do it if I had time. But I don’t have time. The truth is that I feel my life shifting to new directions, and I want to take that. Otherwise, I’ll live in a stagnant world in which I go nowhere… and I can’t have that. I can’t. I want to fly.
So I’m going to be continuing to march through with these other life projects. With the creative writing especially. I hope I can post some of this writing to you guys on tumblr, too! It means I’ll be spending less and less time on tumblr, doing analyses not-anywhere-as-often-as-I-used-to (I don’t know if I’ll ever answer everyone’s asks again, sorry!). Leave tumblr? No. I’ll still be here. But… my shift in time… it’s all in the dream to make meaning out of my life.
Thank you so much for asking again! I hope you’re having a great day, have some fun activities of your own, and are staying awesome!
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Conversation With Taj Bourgeois On Selling Their Paintings Online For A Living
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Marius Larsson: So first of all how long have you been selling paintings? About 2 years now? Taj Bourgeois: Yeah I quit my job driving taxi in December so a little over 2 years. I had a week where I made negative $70 and that was that. I had to do something different. ML: What made you think you could make it as an artist, and how did you initially get started? TB: I didn’t think I could make it lol, but also felt like it might be my last chance to give it my all. If I didn’t at least try once in my life I was concerned I’d feel like a hypocrite if I were to tell my daughter to follow her dreams. Pretty much I just posted on Facebook “Would anyone like to commission a painting?”. I got five responses, one of which was for $600. Honestly I don’t know if I would’ve felt the drive to commit if it weren’t for that, but also my strategy was and has been basically to just make paintings everyday, so people would see I was taking it seriously and in turn take me seriously. ML: And had you been painting much prior? TB: I had made like 7 or 8 paintings in the months leading up to it, so people were aware what I was getting into and I guess displaying some level of skill. Prior to that I hadn’t really painted since around the time my daughter was born in 2012. ML: What kinds of things did you start off painting? TB: In 2012 or in the months before doing it full time? ML: Tell me about 2012, why you took a break for 4 years and then what got you back into it in 2016. TB: When I found out I was going to be a father I had been in college for just a couple semesters taking random art classes. I was just there for the school loans... ya know.. didn’t want to get a job. Anyway I was in a painting class, and it was pretty much my first time painting. I watched the Basquiat documentary “The Radiant Child”, and it made me think about painting in a very different way. A few months after my daughter was born and I won a couple awards for paintings I did for the college’s annual art show. Then I enrolled at the Pacific Northwest College of Art for the Fall semester, but by that point I was learning about hundreds of artist’s on my own time, and was becoming inspired to try all kinds of things other than painting. I felt I did so well that semester that I decided college wasn’t going to be a good use of time or money, so I dropped out and just followed my train of thought for the next 4 years which led back to painting. ML: How did it lead back to painting? TB: I had been driving taxi for a year and a half, and during that time I felt more and more disconnected from any of my previous modes of art making. I was pretty much sitting in the cab making memes and digital collages. Toward the end the collages I was doing started to become more refined, and I started thinking about the merits of painting the imagery I was putting together. The first thing I painted after all that time was an image of flaming goose which was a meme that had been going around. I decided to painted it very large. It was just something I thought would help test the waters again, and also something I figured I’d like to have on my wall. Of course painting a giant meme is going to get a good response online, so I did a couple more, and then painted some scenes from photos, and then from my imagination. Tried to paint the collages I had made but didn’t quite feel right to try to change their medium. ML: Ok so you had a few commissions and then what? You’d post your paintings for sale and people just kept buying them? TB: Yeah although the first 6 months were pretty rough. In April I only made $500, so I was cutting it close, but I was still in the mindset that most artists have, which is like their art has some mysterious value to it and should be expensive, but then I realized it would make more sense if I took it more seriously as a job and charge by the hour, so I started painting more small funny stuff. Like for me it made more sense to sell a bunch of little humorous $50 pieces than cross my fingers on a $300 piece cause it would take me the same amount of time to do 6 of the $50 ones. It wasn’t until around 6 months that I made my first piece that multiple people wanted, and so what I did was make it multiple times, and that’s when things started to pick up. ML: And what was that piece? TB: It was spider man on the floor of an art museum looking up at a painting of a goofy fish with a human face, and spider man is saying in a thought bubble “That Painting Looks The Way I Feel!” It was originally from an old comic and spider man had been looking at some kind of parody Picasso portrait, but you know with memes pieces get replaced, and the mood changes. The fish’s face was a better mood than the Picasso probably.
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ML: How many paintings had you made by that point? TB: Around 70, but had sold maybe 20 ML: What materials were you using? TB: During the taxi days I was in the store (Fred Meyer) and saw this canvas that house painters just lay on the floor to catch the paint drips, and I was like damn 4x15ft for $13? I should get some in case I feel up to making some big paintings someday, but I have always been such a frugal person that it wasn’t until I saw the apple barrel brand paints that I was like damn ok lemme just buy a couple of every color and see if I’m into this. I also bought a gallon of white house paint to “gesso” the canvas. I still use this method on big pieces, and can always stretch later, but lately have been buying a lot of canvas already prepped and stretched. ML: So do you only sell through Facebook and Instagram? TB: Yes oddly enough that’s like 95% of sales. A few every now and then from irl shows where I live here in Portland (Oregon).
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ML: I want to go back to something for a second. You mentioned you started painting in 2012, but then you won a couple awards a few months later. How old were you. How did you excel so quickly considering you said you hadn’t painted prior and what were those painting? TB: I was 24. I think painting is one of those mediums where “ability” is far more subjective than most things. You can view enough of it without trying it yourself to the point that when you do try you’ll already have a grasp of it. I have been interested in painting my whole life, so picking up the brush I already had thousands of hours of experience just thinking about it ya know, so like with that show at the college I knew I wanted to make something big and bold. So I cut myself a 4x7ft canvas and ended up making this multi-colored deer looking straight ahead with sort of hypnotic gaze. That was a people’s choice award, and the other got me a scholarship offer, but for that one I basically had just copied Twombly lol.
ML: How would you describe your style today? TB: Hmm I try not to, cause I try all kinds of stuff. I feel my technical skill level is mediocre but maybe my creative level is high? Different people are going to appreciate different things, and I’ve always been more interested in what the painting depicts over how it’s made. I mean skill aside I think most paintings are pretty umm I want to say “derivative” haha are people still using that word in serious? I’m having fun though, staying curious, and I think that comes across. What’s the point of describing my “style” anyway?
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ML: I’m curious about how you view your own work. TB: I view my own work with my own eyes lol. I view my art like a loving father or maybe more like an observer, a bird watcher? No, ok I think I understand this question now. My approach to painting is often like a mix of writing, drawing, and making memes. Often I have the idea and it doesn’t really matter how I get there unless the technique is the content itself as with a lot of abstract art. Like, I will entirely base a painting on a sentence describing the image itself with little concern about how i will make it. Like “a shuriken stuck in the back of a smiling man”, so I’ll paint some sky, a fence, some grass, blue jeans, man has no shirt, shuriken, blood, he’s holding a beer, he’s smiling alright i did it… nice. That’s one way I view my work as a route to an image. I used to do this all the time before painting. I have an art book from 2015 where I used this method a lot like I’d write down ideas, and then go out and make them happen. Some elements of the end result were arbitrary although I always tried to have good composition and quality documentation. I didn’t think of myself as a photographer though I certainly was and was good at that aspect too, but it was more the means to document my performance, sculpture, installation… sentence made real. I also view a good portion of my paintings as elaborate pages ripped from children’s books that don’t exist (yet) and they’re filled with weird cute characters I never really had any intention to keep making in the first place, but I’m still doing it for some reason maybe because I like the idea of an overarching narrative, but mostly I think cause they give me a deep nostalgia for illustrations in picture books I saw as a kid or like panels from graphic novels.
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ML: That answer is all over the place! I guess that’s what i get for asking such a broad question, but there’s a lot to work with there. Tell me about being a Father. You said it was kind of the catalyst to start making art. How do you think it’s affected your work? TB: Naturally it changed everything. Before my daughter was born I was just so much more aloof, timid, uncertain about making anything. I’d spend so many days just floating around “hanging out” drinking, smoking etc. Maybe I’d draw a little, write a little, play some music, but always felt like I was just killing time waiting for something to happen, and then it did. Suddenly I felt obligated to be at home most of the time, ya know, like a good dad. Other than that I was still in school making the most of it for the short time being. So for that first year I was either home with her or at school. I was just making stuff every day all the time, and it became an insatiable habit especially once I started sharing it online. Yeah honestly I felt the pressure was on. Like I had waited too long to pursue my passions so I had to make up for lost time. I’ve been addicted to making and sharing things everyday ever since. As for my daughter’s influence, yeah I love watching her grow and the things she makes inspire me as well. I’m a bit of a romantic when it comes to modern art and its mythos. I still vibe off what picasso said about how it took him his whole life to paint like a child, so I feel really grateful to work with her. I have literally thousands of her drawings stacked all over the place. She’ll sit down and do fifty drawings in an hour so I’ve gotten a white board lol. Also like I mentioned before it was kind of insane of me to quit my job to become a painter, like I have a kid, rent, bills, a car, and I’m just going to suddenly start painting happy devils to pay for all that? Well, yeah it felt like my last chance to make my dreams a reality. I just wanted to be able to say I did my best and tried to make it work, for myself, and to be a role model in that sense as well. So far so good.
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ML: There seems be a big disparity between artists who make a living off their work and artists who don’t, and what I mean is that when you think of an artist making a living off their work you usually think either they have gallery representation, some kind of branding, or business making the same kinds of things again and again, and yet you seem to have been able to find some middle ground and do all of those things without a business, a degree, or a gallery. What’s it been like overall/how is it going? TB: I still got my foodstamp card haha, but to be honest things are better than ever. I don’t know I just keep at it every day. My belief has been that if I just keep making stuff the right people will notice. I’ve never submitted my work anywhere or asked for opportunities. I let them come to me. I just want to make the art not deal with the other stuff. If a big gallery wants to make money off me they most certainly will but for now I’ve just been doing small independent spaces, and cafe’s which bring in a little extra money but pretty much all my sales are online where I talk to every single person directly.  The most surprising thing has been how many people are interested given that I have less than 5,000 followers/friends. To me that’s a pretty good sign that as my reach grows so will opportunities and I’ve been going hard these past two years. I think I’m just going to be making bigger, better things as more people become interested. I don’t know any artists doing it this way or any way really. I’m not sure Portland is the place to make it happen, but god bless the internet! Getting a college degree makes no sense whatsoever except for becoming a teacher, and I think we know how that’s playing out these days, so I’m just grateful to be doing what I’m doing even though teaching would be pretty cool. Technically you don’t need a degree to teach you just need people who want to learn.
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ML: One thing that seems to have helped you gain momentum is the price of your pieces. I don’t think I’ve ever followed an artist pricing their work so low that wasn’t just really kitschy stencil art or something. I see some of your pieces for $600 that I’d see in a gallery for $6,000 no doubt, but then I see a great deal of $50 pieces. What made you decide to price your work this way? Has it changed over time? TB: Yeah and it’s always the “artists” that comment on the prices being too low which is ironic cause usually all you ever hear from the average person is mocking how ridiculously high the price of art is generally. Basically I think other artist’s scoff because they’re projecting their insecurity regarding the real value of art, and maybe a little envious they can’t let go of their own pieces as though the abstract painting they made in a few hours should be worth thousands when they could be making a dozen similar pieces in a single day.  But um yeah I pretty much think of my stuff as like $30-$50 an hour and really like  that’s fucking amazing for a job. Yeah idk I have worked some shitty jobs, and it doesn’t make sense thinking that my work should be above what a person like myself can afford in the first place. When I first started though I still had the mysterious art value notion and was pricing things around $200 that I’d price $70 now, and didn’t sell much at first. It wasn’t until I started doing smaller pieces and gauging my time that I started selling a lot more and trying a lot of different things. It’s not like i’m making art specifically about making money but I can understand why people are so interested in this aspect. I don’t think it’s very common huh. When I first started I tried to justify it as a performance piece called “The Painter” haha. I used to title all sorts of things in my mind as a means to cope with the daunting reality of the situation “Working Construction”, 2014. Even during some of the lowest points I think it helped me maintain the peculiar sense of an artist identity I didn’t want to let go of even if I was letting go of everything else like “Burning All My Journals & Paintings″, 2015
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ML: Haha what is that last one about? TB: Around the time I stopped living with my wife and moved into my own place I decided to not bring much along with me. I think the title is self-explanatory. ML: I’m wondering if you could talk about any reoccurring themes or characters in a lot of your paintings like the blob fish or spicy boys. TB: Ya know I think most everything just comes to me on a whim and if it works out or holds my interest I’ll keep playing with it. I guess blob fish and spicy boys are like representative of the comedy/tragedy masks or something. I think I’ve simplified a lot of themes in my paintings just so I can keep the flow going. I’m looking forward to spending more time and space on pieces in the future and elaborate on certain things I’ve wanted to express but didn’t know how to put into words. ML: How so? TB: Well, for example. Sometimes I will paint something I’ve seen in my mind, like, dreamed or hallucinated, but not often because a lot of the time I feel I can’t do it justice even though a lot of my stuff is very much informed by these things that I don’t exactly control. It’s like I take video stills from the internet except they’re from my mind, and the screenshot is something I only had to opportunity to view briefly, but even with a split second hallucination I will think about it for weeks and often will just paint its most basic components. Anyway I’m gearing toward eventually elaborating on the more complex ones because lately I have had some visions that have come to the forefront of my interest. Hopefully will get to them after a few more pet portrait commissions haha. ML: What do you mean by hallucinations? Is your inspiration mainly inspired by dreams or do you mean drugs as well? TB: Most things I just write down as interesting ideas to play with, but I guess I don’t want to get too much into talking about drugs. However there have some recent experiences I’ve had with substances like dmt and the things I saw during that I have been thinking about ever since. So right now I’m just trying to get to the end of commissions and then give my attention to some new projects. Have a show in March. Don’t know what I’ll do for it, but certainly no shortage of ideas.
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ML: Where do you see yourself going or where would you like to go, and any other thoughts on painting/selling/art in general? TB: I want to go to the top haha. Well in most ways things are better than ever, and I’m incredibly grateful and I can certainly tolerate having things going at this pace at least another year, but would like to make more serious/invested work that I’m really proud of, get some more money and attention and access to better time/space/materials. At this point though even if I had to get a day job I feel I’m completely committed to doing this work. It’s pretty much how I gauge my self-worth for better or worse. Just hope I can find my groove within the process and better understand myself, inspire others, and I wish I had something more insightful to say, but at the moment I’m a bit preoccupied hustling and just having fun with this upcoming show. Thank yaaaa.
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