#maybe there's a healthy way to do this but so far i haven't seen it

[cute-chamomile]

May i never become so invested in my kids' hobbies that i try to become part of the hobby organization's boards and commitees, making myself an inextricable part of this activity and making the employees' lives a living hell in the process just because i couldnt get my own, separate hobby, amen.

[deeply-unserious-fellow]

I've seen a lot of people comparing Huskerdust to a healthy version of Stolitz and it's kinda got me thinking... Staticmoth as the evil fucked up version of Fizzmodeus.

THINK ABOUT IT!!!!! The parallels between Val and Ozzie are obvious. Like that man wants to be Ozzie so bad it's insane, from the way he dresses to the way he decorates to straight up OWNING A ROBO FIZZ, Val clearly wishes he was the embodiment of Lust. But are there parallels between Vox and Fizz? Actually, surprisingly yeah. They're both showmen, like aggressively so. They're very public figures, with their face all over every product in Hell(albeit Vox is doing it a lot more purposefully then Fizz). Fizz's antagonism towards Blitzø is actually pretty reminiscent of Vox's towards Alastor(except Fizz and Blitzø have a lot more baggage lmao), and they even share some aesthetic similarities! Specifically the colors of Fizz's robotic limbs matching Vox's overall color scheme. Which speaking of robots, that's probably their biggest similarity overall: they're both partially made of technology. I hesitate to say cyborg because Idk how much that applies to Vox, since object heads aren't typically classified as cyborgs as far as I know, and we don't actually know how much of Vox is organic(also cyborg is just one of those words I have an inexplicable dislike of Idk-), but like. Think cyborg I guess. Like Vox is a LOT more of a dick and probably doesn't have a very tragic backstory? Maybe? Unclear. But the similarities are undeniable.

Okay, now that individual parallels are out of the way, how could their relationship to eachother parallel Fizzmodeus? Starting with baseline aesthetics: they got the height difference. It's not as dramatic as Fizz and Ozzie's but TO BE FAIR, Huskerdust are the same way(their height difference is obvious, but not as massive as Blitzø and Stolas'). Staticmoth is also very buisness-partners-with-benefits and some hints at deeper feelings, which is how we were introduced to Fizzmodeus. I don't think Val and Vox feel the need to hide their romantic feelings? But tbh it could go either way we haven't seen much of their dynamic yet. That's kinda where the similarities I could spot find because see previous sentence, so let's move onto the differences!

I think a good way to breakdown what makes Staticmoth toxic Fizzmodeus is actually by bringing Alastor and Blitzø back in to compare and contrast how Val handles Vox's rivalry with how Ozzie handles Fizz's. In Radio Killed the Video Star, the only reason Val tells Vox that Alastor is at the hotel is to piss him off. He clearly enjoys Vox's reaction, and keeps egging him on. Teasing him about it. Which like, friendly teasing between partners is well and good, but Val is clearly just doing it cause he wants to see a fight and doesn't care about how distressed Vox is about this. Vox goes off on his own and sings a fuckin banger, gets publically humiliated, causes a massive blackout. Val doesn't really do shit to help him out, just kinda sits there and. Idk watches? Unclear what the other Vees are actually doing because most of Stayed Gone takes place in funny TV land where Vox is capable of bending reality to his whim for the sake of visual interest. But what Val is actively doing during the musical number isn't important so who cares. What's important is that he egged Vox on, convinced him that confronting Alastor right then was a good idea, and then just sat back as Vox got so pissed off he had a meltdown. Which I SWEAR I'm not trying to dramatize this scene it just sounds really fucking bad when you write it all down from this perspective. I think it's also worth noting that all of this is DIRECTLY AFTER Vox did the exact opposite for Val, calming him down so he doesn't make a fool of himself in public.

Meanwhile compare that to how Ozzie handles Fizz and Blitzø's relationship. During House of Asmodeus, once Fizz realizes Blitzø is there, he starts publically roasting him about how shitty his love life is. Ozzie encourages him, and even gives him a little congratualtions in the background when Verosika joins in for changing the subject, but the difference here is that House of Asmodeus takes place in a much more controlled environment, so it's less likely either of them will have to face consequences for being assholes. There's also how Ozzie's encouragement is just a lot more genuine. Like "yeah babe, go insult that guy who traumatized and abandoned you whoo!" rather then "hey hey look there's that guy you hate. You should go fight with him lmao show him who's boss." Then there's the ending. At the end of both Stayed Gone and House of Asmodeus, Vox and Fizz eat shit and die. Don't worry they're both fine like immediately after, but while in House of Asmodeus Ozzie immediately rushes over to Fizz to make sure okay, we uh. Do not see Vox interact with anybody but Alastor in the direct aftermath of his eating shit and dying, which is fair because he's in his weird little gamer cave. Then we skip straight to the Vees having a meeting to decide what they're gonna do about Alastor, and we don't really know what any of them were doing in the interim between the end of Stayed Gone and the meeting, so uh this part of the comparison kinda falls flat. But again something worth noting is that Val just straight up. Does not care about Alastor during the meeting scene. He's sitting there bedazzling his fucking gun BY HAND with school glue and rhinestones, not even paying attention to the meeting, despite being the one to get Vox all riled up about Alastor IN THE FIRST PLACE.

In short: Val encourages Vox to fight Alastor without thinking it through, doesn't bother to help out during the actual fight, and then immediately stops caring the moment the fights over. Meanwhile Ozzie, while encouraging Fizz to pick on Blitzø, backs him up the whole time, and while still supportive of his boyfriend, doesn't actively encourage Fizz to do things that would get him hurt. Ozzie also supports Fizz by refusing to let Blitzø have an Asmodean crystal because he knows Fizz wouldn't like it! Which is the exact opposite of pissing your partner off on purpose so you can watch a fight!!! And if that isn't enough evidence for you, then uh. I guess you could compare how Val treats... just everybody around him, really, with how Ozzie does(but that's more individual character analysis than relationship analysis). Or you could talk about how fed up with Val's shit Vox clearly is in comparison to the mutual support of Fizzmodeus. Or how. Val throws a glass at Vox. And breaks his phone. And then Vox has to scream in his face to get him to listen-

Idk how to end this so uh. DEMON ATTACK RAH!!! 👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹

[bblueraven-and-fandoms14]

Can we talk about how crazy Phoenix Wright's actions are in the trilogy like wdym you found this man you met for like, maybe a year when you were a kid, and decided to pursue him and follow him so deeply you changed entire career paths just for a CHANCE at meeting him again. This is a bit creepy!! At the very least just, crazy. And he came in preaching about how much Miles changed and searching to "save him" like Phoenix Wright!!! You very-close-to-stalker-status man!!!

But what really gets me is that Miles CAVES. Miles, dare I say it, Liked It. And this is what I want to talk about because. Can we talk about how lonely, and isolated, and just mentally not okay Miles was that this affection, although it takes him aback at first and does alarm him in some way, doesn't alarm him because it's insane but because it won't allow him to keep up his current way of life 😭 Miles last memory of healthy affection was his father and that has been tainted beyond belief. So imagine you're doing bad mentally, you are incredibly lonely, affection has been hard to come by, and a man appears that says "I care and I'll save you trust". Forget you haven't seen him in years and forget that you aren't thinking deeper about the fact he claims friendship status even though it's actually been very brief in the past and, again, YEARS since you've either thought of him or even looked at him. What would you do?

Like just. Miles matched his freak, he did, but I think he matched it because to him it was salvation. Because he had nothing else in his life so he took one of the first things given to him without condition, freaky/creepy/a bit insane or not 😭 I think about this all the time. Miles clung because he had nothing else, there was very little else, and so he accepted it in the end. Ik he has Franziska and Gumshoe but those, at least in so far as the first game, will always be at a distance because of the way his life has worked so far. Phoenix Worked because he kinda forced himself in. He said I Will Love you and I Will Save you, thank you, idrc about your protests, sorry but im attached. And that's, good intentions or not. A bit crazy 🤔

I love Narumitsu guys and I especially love is-kinda-obssesive-crazy-unhealthy- sometimes-and-it-only-gets-worse narumitsu and Phoenix Wright God bless.

[polarisjisung]

BEST THING I NEVER HAD

synopsis: the line between giving up and seeing how much more you can take had always been blurry, tonight it seems nonexistent

wc: 3.1k

pairings: jaemin × fem!reader

genre: angst, hearbreak

warnings: mentions of violence, jaemin's injured, use of petnames, jaemin's oblivious and annoying, jaemin sucks, basically a situationship, slight gaslighting

notes: HAPPY JAEMIN DAY, i have a love hate relationship with this work (I suppose you could say its bittersweet 🤭) anyways here's part one! pls notice the beyoncé inspired title

Despite its softness, you can't help but jump at the sound of knocking against your front door.

just loud enough that you'd hear, but quiet enough that your parents wouldn't. It was a specific pattern of 5 knocks, delivered through the knuckles of an index and middle finger, in true jaemin fashion.

You wonder if its healthy, to be able to recognise the hooded silhouette that stands outside your door, to know someone from nothing but the tapping of their knuckles against a slab of wood, to know exactly the state you'll find him in if you swing the door open like you usually would.

It isn't, you suppose. but healthy had never been the word to describe you and jaemin. not the ungodly dessert bowls you made as midnight snacks together, not the lounging around all day doing nothing and certainly not the cycle of longing you found yourself in.

Time and time again you found yourself tearing yourself apart for him, for his love, and each time it would end with you slowly putting those broken pieces, shreds, of yourself back together, alone and all by yourself.

Though you're not sure you did ever recover fully, like a piece of your heart was lost every time jaemin turned his back to leave and never come back.

Like the tiny fragments of a broken glass, the ones you could never quite see as you sweeped up a mess of shattered glass and would find yourself stepping all over days later.

But he did come back. You suppose that was the problem, he came back every time.

Jaemin had this perfect ability of keeping you on edge, never pushing you far enough to leave, never pushing himself far enough to stay. It was the way he did most things, showing up at your door at a time you weren't sure was morning or night, coming back just before you'd manage to convince yourself he wouldn't, leaving just before your hope that he'd stay would come true. jaemin took this middle path in life that lead to the worst of both worlds, best of none. and it left you unsatisfied every time

Regardless, you'd been craving, almost desperate for his presence, anticipation bubbling in your chest every night since the last you'd seen him, in hopes you'd find a wounded jaemin helplessly stood at your doorstep with sparkly eyes and a smile that told you it would all be alright. it seemed that was the only way you saw him anyways, the way you hated most, injured that is.

So you'd prayed day and night, clasped your hands together and had gotten down on your knees and begged that he'd stay true to his word, that he wouldn't leave and that this wouldn't happen— yet here you were.

You haven't seen jaemin in weeks, but you still remember it all the same, the spark of glee that would ignite within you whenever you heard him at your door.

Tonight his presence makes your chest tighten and your mouth dry up— you feel the way your breaths force themselves through the confines of your throat, almost choking you.

The feeling is foreign and a sharp contrast to the way your cheeks would flush over and your heart would once race at the thought of jaemin.

Tonight you stray far from that love struck awe, eyes clenched so hard you were beginning to see colour. there's a growing lump in your throat that doesn't seem as negligible as before, with each shortened intake of breath it doubles maybe even triples in size— your vision, in spite of your shut eyes, blurrs into an abyss of absolute nothingness

And despite the thick wooden door that separates you, tonight na jaemin's presence feels suffocating.

You're not sure you'd describe it as love, certainly it wasn't that warm feeling of butterflies in your stomach and giddiness you knew before, like you were star struck, instead it was this feverish conjugation that made your hands clammy and your ears ring. Like the butterflies now had broken wings. You felt ill.

It had always been that way, only your heart would wrench after jaemin left and never while he stood expectant on your front porch. You suppose when he leaves for so long and stays for so little, your heart doesn't bother to acknowledge his visits anymore, like some form of a self-defense mechanism that protects you against yourself. because you never really could protect yourself against him

Suddenly, the difference being lovestruck and lovesick had never been clearer.

It had been three months.

A whole three months since you'd last seen him and tonight, tonight was the night he came back— unannounced, unexpected, and finally, finally, after days and weeks of convincing yourself, unwanted.

You know better than to let him in, not just into your home, but into your heart. And if you had learnt anything in your lifetime of knowing na jaemin, it was that those two were absolutely synonymous

Your heart that had only just now begun to learn that it could survive without him, thrive without him in fact.

You know that this is it, tonight would make it or break it— either way you know it would break you.

In the long run, it's not hard to figure out what you should do but you're a creature of habit, compelled by nothing more than muscle memory and indecision.

Your shaking hands reach for the door and begin turning the lock faster than you can convince yourself against the idea.

sure enough there he is, not an inch of skin that isn't painted in the cold shades of purple and blue yet hes staring up at you with so much warmth.

"How do you always get yourself like this, how do you get worse everytime" your words came as whisper.

You're not sure if your words hold the alternate meaning you hope they do, but as you take in the image of jaemin in front of you, you swear he's almost unrecognisable, so far beyond bruised that you wonder if you should be so cruel as to slam the door in his face.

He shrugs in response to your question, the cold breeze that brushes past the two of you biting at your skin, the thin material of your pyjama shorts doing little to nothing to keep your warm.

You're not supposed to let him in, but surely, you could always find a way to push him out, right?

There's some sort of a cheeky grin on his lips as you step aside to let him in, perhaps if he knew this was the last time he'd be stepping through the double doors of your home he would've worn an expression a lot different— you hoped he would at least.

But you know better than to occupy yourself in thoughts of what ifs.

Jaemin makes a beeline for the couch, as you do for the first aid kit that rests atop the kitchen cupboards, wordlessly.

Though the silence is nothing new, jaemin doesn't feel the welcoming atmosphere around him as he steps further into your home, in fact he feels nothing at all.

He looks over at you.

It's not tiredness that sits atop your features, the details of your pretty face all committed to his memory, yet the slight furrow of your brows and the way your lips pinch into a tight line aren't familiar to jaemin at all. There's something he can't quite put his finger on that sends him into a frenzy of panic and worry

"Hey doll?" you hum in response "are you okay?"

"Am I okay?" you chuckle wryly, "shouldn't I be asking you that jaemin?"

"Touche" you assume he lets it go, but jaemin doesnt know how, pushing a little further

"You just seem a little, off?"

After all, limits weren't something jaemin recognised well

You hate that he can't recognise the plain, simple and painfully obvious look of disappointment that's written all over your face either

Regardless you don't worry enough about his words to credit him with a response, rubbing the antiseptic roughly into his skin before reaching for the tube and letting it fall into the empty trash can, the thud as it hit the bottom filling you with ease.

You hate waste just as much as the next person, but wasting a little medicine was fine, just as long as you didn't waste anymore time on him.

Jaemin's brows knit together in a tight knot, watching you make your way back towards him with full consciousness, though there's something about the way you walk, trudge even, maybe its the way your feet drag across the carpet or the way your steps seem smaller, less eager, that has his heart sinking a little

"Doll, I'm not sure you meant to put that there" he says, attempting to brush a stray hair from your face, though you turn your head before he gets the chance

"Hmm?" your eyes trail over to the bin "oh, I just thought if I'm never going to use it again, there's no point keeping it around" you shrug

But you always kept it around, you kept it for him— remember he was allergic to the regular stuff.

What did you mean you'd never use it again?

Jaemin licks his lips, letting a soft sigh escape them as he watches you hurriedly place band aids over his cuts

"What's got you like this?" he says, you play innocent, shooting a look of confusion his way— jaemin doesn't expand, you don't answer

The room is cold, or at least it feels that way, despite the fire that's burning just a few feet away from him. The chill of silence is overwhelming, and the warmth you'd once emit in your words, in your actions, in your gaze, they're all missing.

"Did I do something wrong?" he whispers, innocent beady eyes forced into your face as he holds you close, not letting you slip through his hands— ironically you're already too far out of reach

All it takes is for you to bite at the left corner of your bottom lip for jaemin to know you're deep in thought

You wonder if he's just playing oblivious or if jaemin really and truly thinks that his little back and forth games don't have any consequences.

Either way, you shake your head at him— it wasn't all his fault.

Really you had no one to blame except yourself, you should've known better than to be so vulnerable to the likes of him.

You know better than to tell him what's wroong. You know that you can't risk receiving an apology from him, because if he made even the slightest inclination to sorriness, you'd accept it.

That's how you loved him. How much you loved him.

At one point you swore you'd let him drag you down to hell if it meant you could hold his hand on the way down— you're not sure the life you're living is much different though

You're not entirely sure you wouldn't let him drag you down now either, but the lack of certainty is the only push you need to know that this time, it's your turn to be selfish.

"All done," you whisper, his wounds quickly tended to with little precision and perhaps even less care, absentmindedly wrapped in a loose gauze.

This time, jaemin catches onto the ulterior meaning of your words, watching the way you head towards the staircase.

"Doll, talk to me what's wrong?" it's that tone laced with all forms of concern and worry that has the tears welling in your eyes

If jaemin hadn't reached out for your wrist and stopped you, you'd have made your way back up to your room without another word

But he does, he does stop you and it stops you from walking away

"I don't think I can" you say and all jaemin can do is tug at your wrist to finally get you to face him, a dull expression on your face. Every feature he knows and loves and remembers contorted into a look of nothingness.

"Y/n, please"

"Just go jaemin, you know the way out" you sigh, your speech is tired and lacks energy, a deep reflection of your soul and how you felt about the routine the two of you had established. If only Jaemin could see that.

"I can't just go when you're so clearly upset" he says— oh, but he can

You knew that better than anyone else.

"You let yourself believe that"

The words come as a whisper, like you almost hope he doesn't hear them, fast off the tongue but meant with true intent

And to jaemin they tasted bitter, superficial, like you didn't speak with your heart, but your mind, the sweetness he knew of your speech so severely lacking.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that you're so oblivious to how—" for a moment you're ready to tell jaemin all there is to know about the two of you, but you know its no use, jaemin would feed you the sweetest lies and you'd mistake them as the truest of promises.

"Actually you know what never mind what I mean, just go jaemin" you sigh, raking your fingers through your hair

You take his silence as reason to continue, maybe because talking is the only thing you know will keep the tears in your eyes from falling or maybe it's the look in his eyes that urges you to continue

"We're stuck in this never-ending loop, can't you see that?" the control you had over the volume of your voice diminishes with each word, but you're not sure you care, "just stop jaemin"

"Stop what?"

"Coming back" you suck in a harsh breath "just leave like you always do but this time, don't come back, please please please don't come back" you hate the way your voice cracks and your speech almost falters, burning your throat.

"I'll do whatever you say doll, just tell me what this is about and I prom—"

You cut him off before he can let the word fall from his lips, eyes widened before being clenched shut in the span of a few seconds

"Don't promise jaemin, you never stick to them" you sigh again "just go"

"You know I can't"

"you do it every time, what makes this time so different?" your tone is sour and jaemin knows better than to dispute your words, harsh but so painfully true

"You're upset" he tries, but it doesn't seem enough when you scoff right in his face and the feeling that follows only makes you hope you'd done this all so much earlier.

"Yeah? well that's nothing new, just walk out the door and break my heart like you always do— I'm begging" you shut your eyes, a harsh deep breath taken in before you continue "I need time to heal, you never give me time to heal, so I'm begging you this time, just don't come back"

"Break your heart?" the words echo from his tongue in fragments, like he's still piecing together your sentences to make sense of them. Jaemins eyes are soft and glossy as he looks up at you a couple steps away

"yeah"

"But I love you doll, I only come back because I love you" that's something you wish jaemin could've said sooner, maybe it would've meant something then.

It's a lie, you know it is, you're sure it is and despite all the lies he tells you, you'd never wished more than this for his words to be true.

"Then stop" you say, trying to shoot off up the stairs but jaemin's fingers remain wrapped aorund your wrist, grip firm and unwavering

"So what? you're just going to throw it all away? all this time we've known each other, all the memories, you're just going to pretend it doesn't exist?" he finally argued back, mouth slightly ajar as his breaths grew deeper "like we don't exist?"

"We don't jaemin, reality is that you're not mine and I'm not yours as much as I let myself be— you and I we just don't work" you wonder if he's even listening when he turns his head, scoffing to the floor with a tongue running across his inner cheek "we're not good for each oth--"

"How can you know that when we've never even tried" his voice is loud, the loudest you've ever heard, a deep booming from the pit of his stomach that has you reeling back, gulping as he cuts you off

"I don't know about you jaemin but I tried jaemin, I did but now I'm tired"

"How can you be tired of us?" his voice shakes, he seems feeble despite what he was just a few moments ago— you realise it's one of jaemin's best tactics, making you pity him when it's the last thing you should be doing.

Somehow despite how aware you are of it now, your heart still wrenches at the thought of upsetting him.

"it's not us" you defend, knowing full well that that's exactly what it was " I just, I don't deserve this jaemin, I don't deserve someone who keeps coming back" the glossiness of his eyes grows further " I deserve someone who never leaves"

"Then why are you telling me to go?" his eyes are telling, red and his heart, even if just for a moment rests on his sleeve.

"Because I know you, you're not capable of staying. You can't" his grip loosens, he takes a step back and though he argues again, you know this is it.

"I can. I will. I'd do anything for you" he says, and you swear your gulp is audible, you almost hear it echo through the room. Your stomach churns. You feel the way your insides tip upside down and back over again at the site of jaemin's furrowed brows and narrowed eyes, those pouty lips that you once loved bruised and trembling. His gaze though fixated on you is aloof, like he's not present at all. Suddenly it all feels too real. The way he pulls back, the spark in his eyes dimming and the confidence in his stance diminishing. Jaemin was giving up. But he wasn't giving up without a fight.

"You would?" you don't know why you ask, but jaemin nods anyway, and perhaps it soothes your broken heart ever so slightly to live in the blissful ignorance of thinking that his words were true. That he meant what he said.

To think that he ever loved you, even if for just a fraction of a moment, gives you reason to believe that this had all been worth it.

But you know better than to let a moments love turn into a lifetime's regret.

"Yeah" jaemin's words escape him in a sharp breath.

He finds himself holding onto the last thread of hope in your eyes that tells him that you feel the same. He holds your stare in his own for a while and though it was not warm, and it certainly was not kind— it was loving. And love was all jaemin had ever known from you.

"Then go" You say, and despite the various other words resting at the tip of your tongue, it's all you say.

Jaemin is left to do nothing but watch. You had taught him love, and now you had let him go.

The front door slams shut before you reach the top of the stairs, and it finally hits you that this is it.

Jaemin was gone, and just like you asked, he never came back.

permanent taglist : @sinisxtea @dearlyminhyung @nanawrlds

[kookslastbutton]

Best Intentions ༓ myg (m)

✑ Summary: As vice president, you are obligated to attend your boss's wedding–you're also his friend. But while you should be focused on the newlyweds, you find yourself far too interested in the attractive best man and the woman who happens to be his plus one.

Pairing: best man!yoongi x vice president!reader

AU/genre: angst, smut, slight thriller, s2l, oneshot

Rating: M, 18+

Word Count: 3,753

Warnings: No infidelity, dark yoongi, sexual content, death (not major character)

sexual warnings: dom!yoongi, sub!reader, cussing, handj*b, unprotected s*x (don't follow their lead!), penetration, car sex, d*rty talk, they c*me together, yoongi has tattoos

Now Playing: Haegeum

A/N: Little nervous about this one butI haven't written fic inspired by Haegeum yet so here we go! Hope you enjoy 💞

You watch as he brushes a few pieces of his dark locks out of his face. Never have you seen such a handsome and alluring man. He takes a seat on the barstool, nodding at the bartender in greeting. “Whiskey, neat. And a sex on the beach for the lady.”

He turns his head over his right shoulder, sparing a glance at the gentle hand resting on him. The woman who it belongs to is nothing short of radiant and confident. Her body is athletically built, her skin soft but tough. Her name is Yeong-Ja and she happens to be his plus one.

“__.” She smiles at you with ruby-red lips. “Why don’t you join us?” Her tone is thick and laced with sensuality. You fight the temptation but you feel instantly small compared to her. It’s not that you find yourself unattractive or anything but Yeong-Ja has a certain aura that’s incredibly rare.

The man, Min Yoongi, sets his gaze on you with a similar intensity. You only met the both of them about half an hour ago and they were already perfectly successful at making your bones quake. You’ve heard the idea of power couples a million times and though Min Yoongi and Yeong-Ja weren't officially together, you'd be a fool to think I'd never happen. They came here together after all.

“Thank you for the invite,” you reply, keeping your eyes as firm as you can. “But I still need to pay my respects to President Kim and his lovely new wife.”

Yeong-Ja taps Yoongi twice, signaling him to stand up. “I need to do that too actually. Why don’t we go together?”

He stays seated despite her gesture. “The drinks haven’t come out yet. I’ll wait for them if you two wanna go.” He looks at you again with his piercing, cat-like eyes. “You sure you don’t want anything __?”

You smooth down the sides of your dress, a nervous response you picked up since a teenager. You wish he wouldn’t follow the movement but he does. “Sure, maybe a strawberry daiquiri.”

Yoongi gives a nod and asks the bartender to include it in the order. “Thank you,” you say.

“Shall we?” Yeong-Ja breaks from Yoongi to near your side. “President Kim’s about to have a ton of guests giving their congratulations. It’s best we do it before the newlyweds run out of steam.”

You nod and make your way to the wedding table.

"Congratulations President and Mrs. Kim." You bow in respect until you're pulled into a light hug.

"Thank you __," Mrs. Kim says. You'd be surprised by the hug if it weren't for the fact that the two of you have known each other since before she and your boss first started dating.

You were the one to set them up actually.

You never thought you'd have that much gull with your boss but you and Seokjin had been working together for a long time. You considered him a friend.

"I'm very happy for the both of you." You smile warmly and embrace Mrs. Kim a little tighter. "And you make such a beautiful bride."

Once broken apart, Yeong-Ja bows herself. "President Kim, Mrs. Kim." They bow in return. "I'm honored to be a guest at your wedding. I wish you both a strong, healthy marriage."

Mrs. Kim smiles wide and touches the woman on the wrist. "Thank you Yeong-Ja....I'm hoping to be a guest at your wedding as well. If you don't mind me asking, how long have you and Yoongi been seeing each other?"

Swallow it. That suddenly sick, queasy feeling in your stomach. If Yoongi was planning to get serious with Yeong-Ja, it's none of your business.

Yeong-Ja blushes and lets out a small chuckle. "Of course, I'll be sure to invite you to my wedding but I'm afraid that won't be anytime soon. Yoongi and I have only been seeing each other for a couple of weeks."

Weeks? With the chemistry they have you figured they were at least at months.

"I wouldn't be too set on it being far out into the future," Seokjin says. "One of my colleagues got married after only six months of dating his girlfriend."

"Who was that?" You mouth to which he replied with 'gguk'. Ah, makes sense now.

"Plus," Seokjin continues, "Yoongi's always talking about you and that's saying a lot considering he's pretty brief in general. Whatever you got, it's keeping his attention." He blinks up and cracks a smirk. "Speak of the devil."

Yoongi walks towards the group of you with a drink in each hand. You really need to not stare at his perfectly chiseled face, stoic eyes, and slicked-back hair. Especially after hearing that he's been practically gushing about Yeong-Ja. Still, a bitch doesn't listen.

"Strawberry daiquiri." He passes you your drink before handing Yeong-Ja hers. "And a sex on the beach." He keeps a straight face as he does this.

You notice he's taken his suit jacket off since your last interaction. His sleeves are rolled up too, veins softly protruding.

"Many thanks," you say, taking a sip. "Where's your whiskey?" You distinctively remember him asking the bartender for one but it's nowhere in sight.

Yoongi gives a quick shrug. "Already drank it."

Before another word is spoken the stereos in the reception are cranked up. Yeong-Ja takes a sip of her drink and then snakes her hand into Yoongi's arm. "Come on, we should dance. You too __."

You shake your head. Absolutely not. Dancing is fun when you're with friends but not so much with couples. You learned that the hard way many times when you'd be told that you'll all dance together.

Wrong for you to fall for that.

As soon as a slow, sensual song came on, you'd be hitting the bar or going back to your claimed table in the corner.

"No I'm good. I wanna sit and enjoy my drink for now." You lift your glass to make your point clearer.

Yeong-Ja smiles at you, then tightens her grip around Yoongi's arm and drags him to the dance floor.

You try not to watch them.

You even try sitting in the chair facing opposite of them.

But you look like a wallflower.

Several men come up to you to ask you if you want to dance, thinking you're only waiting for an invitation. Nice of them to offer but you take no interest.

The only man you remotely have your mind on is currently being swayed by another woman. And after about twenty minutes of watching, you find out that Yeong-Ja is not only a sharp thinker and sweet talker—she's also a stunning dancer.

You can tell at first Yoongi is half-assing it but once she starts getting into the beat, his efforts double.

When it comes to the slower songs, however, you can't help but notice a shift in his posture. Yeong-Ja links both arms around his neck in an effort to close the gap between her and Yoongi. It doesn't close, however, as he keeps a safe distance.

It's odd, to say the least but maybe he's just not used to that type of intimacy yet. You continue to study the two of them until you're caught red-handed. Yoongi's eyes shift over to peer into yours.

You have to snap yourself out of your daze a few times. He's definitely just staring off due to the somber music. He's not looking at you.

Oh, shit—he is.

Yoongi traces his eyes down the lines of your dress, all the way down your bare legs and back up to your eyes. His gaze is heavy and gives you goosebumps.

You grip your glass with one hand while the other clings to the edge of your dress, earning you a half-smirk from him.

Fuck.

He's a man of few words but his non-verbals speak volumes.

"She's not his girlfriend." Seokjin looks up at you from his seated position. Mrs. Kim was mingling with some of her close friends so you seized the chance to ask Seokjin about what had just happened. You needed a second opinion. "But they came here together so I assume they're going out. Are you sure he was giving you suggestive looks?"

"I mean, they weren't that suggestive but he definitely body-scanned me and smirked." You pause before continuing. "I'm trying not to think about it in case—uh I don't know. I'm sorry, it's your wedding day and I shouldn't be bothering you about this stuff."

"__, we've been working basically side by side for ten years. Yes I'm your boss still but right now I'd like to think we're friends. You're not bothering me, okay? And as far as Yoongi goes, just ignore it. He was likely smiling at you and it came off as a smirk. If it happens again maybe ask him about it because as far as I know, things are going good between him and Yeong-Ja." Obviously not that well if he's checking out someone else. You bite back the need to speak your mind.

"Okay," you agree. "You're right. It was likely just nothing."

"But you didn't finish your sentence." Seokjin pipes up before you return to your seat. "You're trying not to think about in case what?"

Let's see....how to reply while remaining subtle as possible. Seokjin and Yoongi are close friends so you need to choose your words very carefully.

Telling him you have interest in Yoongi when he's told you over and over again that he's seeing someone would not end well. A classic Kim Seokjin scold would be in dire order.

"....just in case I'm just being foolish or exaggerating what really happened." You say the words casually, no a trace of a fib. "But thanks Seokjin, for letting me talk to you about it."

"Hey." Yoongi catches you in the hallway. Apparently also needed to use the restroom. You do your best to shrug off what happened earlier.

"Hi, how was dancing?" You ask stupidly.

"It was alright. Not usually my thing but I guess I didn't mind. You sure you didn't wanna join us though? Saw a few guys come up to you."

"You saw that?" And here you were thinking you were delusional for thinking Yoongi was purposefully paying attention to you. It causes a twinge of adrenaline to zap through your body. "I didn't really feel like dancing today, that's all."

For a second you and Yoongi exchange silence. You're not sure if he's done talking or if you need to fill the space with more small talk.

"I'm glad it was better for you than usual. Yeong-Ja looks like she knows what she's doing." You fake a small laugh, hoping to break the tension but Yoongi's face remains straight. "Well I should get back in there." You end up slowly walking away but he stops you.

"We don't know each other super well but, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable earlier."

"What are you refering to?"

Yoongi gives you a 'really' look before flashing a gummy smile. It's the first time tonight you've seen him smile so fully. Your breath hitches as he continues. "I think we both know the answer to that. Don't you know how captivating you look in this dress?"

If your mouth wasn't gaping before it such as heck is now. But as giddy as the compliment makes you, you're in no way going to mess up a potentially blossoming relationship. You sure as hell hope that Yoongi isn't double-crossing Yeong-Ja, even if you do wish you'd be in her shoes a little.

"Um, not to be so forward but aren't you with Yeong-Ja? I appreciate the compliment though I'd—"

"We're not serious."

"Excuse me?" You as so utterly lost. Sure he and Yeong-Ja weren't together officially yet but they came here as each other's date. Seokjin and his wife were also making comments about their supposedly romantic relationship and she wasn't denying it so why is he coming onto you like this?

"That didn't come out right. I mean, we're not together romantically but we do work together. I asked her to come because I figured she'd be good company. Seokjin thinks we mold together well but I'm not really interested. To keep it short, I respect her as a coworker and consider her in the highest regard, professionally."

"You're not lying to me right? Because she seems really interested and I don't want to get in the way of anything. I'm not that type of woman alright?" You cross your arms reflexively.

Yoongi takes a step towards you, focused intent. "I have no reason to lie to you __. It's true Yeong-Ja may be interested but she's not the one I've spent half the night staring at."

The hairs on your neck stand straight. Blood rushes through your veins. "You should probably tell Yeong-Ja your feelings then."

"I did," Yoongi interuppts. "When we were back in there she came onto me. I thought all the slow, romantic music was getting to her but she kept trying to kiss me so I had to tell her I wasn't interested in anything beyond friendship."

"Oh, well, is she okay or—"

"She'll be fine. She's like me, not much fazes her. She's likely hitting on the next guy that takes her fancy now." Yoongi inches closer, and you take in the cologne he's wearing. It's subtle but enough to knock you out of your senses. "So you see, I'm not that kind of man either."

"Well good because I would have kicked you in the balls if you were double-crossing Yeong-Ja."

Yoongi snorts. "I'd expect nothing less. But thankfully, my balls are safe for now."

Great, now you're thinking about his balls. Yoongi's breath blows hot against your skin as the space between you seems to get narrower and narrower.

"Do you wanna get out of here for a bit?" He asks with a hoarse voice. "I was thinking about going out for a quick smoke."

"I don't smo—" Yoongi quirks a provocative brow. "Oh, " you finish, knowing full well he isn't proposing to have just a smoke.

You shudder as he towers above you in the backseat of his Bentley. Evidently, Yoongi did well for himself. "We shouldn't be doing this here." When Yoongi proposed you to go out, you didn't expect him to be this quick to get down and dirty.

Fooling around is one thing, but fucking in the backseat of his car in the middle of a wedding is a whole new animal for you.

"No one's gonna see if that's what you're worried about. Everyone's too busy wishing the newlyweds well..." His car is short on space but Yoongi manages to remove his silk vest. The skin of his smooth chest peeks out near the collar of his dress shirt. "But if you wanna stop here then, I won't force you any further."

God this is so indecent but you want him so, so bad. His body on yours, in yours—fuck him for being this hard to resist. You grip the fabric of his shirt and tug him back down.

Yoongi takes the opportunity to sink his head near your ear. "I was hoping this would be your answer." Your eyes roll up when he places a hot, open-mouth kiss on your neck. It's not sloppy but rather controlled as if hinting that this isn't his first go around.

"Take it out for me sweetheart." He coos after a few more nips at your jaw. The look of bewilderment on your face brings out a cocky smirk. "Please?"

His eyes turn playful as he watches you fumble with his belt. "Sorry," he says. "I usually prefer doing this myself but given the position we're in, it's better you do it." You nod. "I'd also take my time with you if it weren't for the fact that we're in my car right now." Who's fault is that? You bite down your bitterness.

"I understand." You pull at his belt buckle, releasing the leather from its hold. He groans when the tips of your fingers graze his bulge. Once you unzip the front of his pants you reach forward to free his cock.

"Fuck," Yoongi breathes, his hard length pulsating in your hand. You whimper and reflexively squeeze him harder. "Shit, don't."

You feel hot all over, drunk on the pleasure he's getting from this. "But you like this," you say, moving your hand up and down his shaft. Arousal pools in your panties as you watch him struggle to gain his composure. You wouldn't be disappointed if he came in your hand from this, but Yoongi puts a stake in those plans like a tidal wave.

He reaches between his legs, suddenly yanking your hand off of him to place it above your head. "You know what I really like __?" He grabs your other hand to join it with the other. "When people listen to what their told the first time."

He pushes up the skirt of your dress, tugs your panties to the side, and thrusts himself into you in one full motion. The immediate stretch has you gasping for air. "Fuck Yoongi–" Yes, you're wet but you still need time to adjust! "Yoongi please, I need a second."

He doesn't respond with any more than husky groans as he steadies himself above you, hands clamping down on your waist. Yoongi stills himself in you, waiting for your signal to move and when you give it to him he wastes no time setting a vigorous pace.

Every push and pull sets your body on fire as his length beats inside you. You move to claw at his back, desperately needing something to grip, but your hands are thrown back down. "Leave them," he growls.

You end up clutching your wrists as your body bounces up and down the seat of the car. The friction is a little rough due to the leather material but you don't have time to think much about it as long as Yoongi keeps fucking you this good.

"Feels-ah-amazing Yoongi, fuck. How'd you get so good at this?"

"How do you think sweetheart?" He wraps one of your legs around his waist, the new angle allows him to sink deeper into your gut. Your hips arch and a few more buttons on Yoongi's dress shirt pop open.

"You have a–chest-chest tattoo?" It's only a blur and you barely get a glimpse when he leans his body forward. But over his heart is black ink in the form of what you can only guess as some kind of wild cat.

"Mhm," he grunts. "Got it when I was 19. One of those impulsive things. Fuck–" he curses feeling you clench around him. "Is this a turn-on for you? You're squeezing me so fucking hard right now."

"Yes. My attraction for you went up about 100%, I can't explain it."

He's amused, shit-eating grin on his far too handsome face. "Well lucky for you, you don't have to explain anything. Open my shirt."

You do as he says and swallow hard seeing the tattoo of a bobcat over his left pec. He can tell you want to ask about it but being that his cock is deep in your heat, he's a little preoccupied. "I'll tell you about it later when we're not you know–fucking like rabbits in the back seat of my Bentley."

You let out a small giggle. It's a wonder no one's caught you yet. Yoongi picks up the pace again, with rough thrusts and beads of sweat around his forehead. "Fuck this pussy is making me so hard. Never been in something so wet and tight in my life." You moan as his cock drags in and out of you, stimulating your g-spot only too perfectly.

"Oh god 'm gonna come Yoongi!" You can't hold back your screams anymore. He's hitting inside you so well, cock throbbing, hair sweaty, muscles tensing, and that sinful chest tattoo teasing in front of your eyes.

"Damn right you are, make this cock yours sweetheart."

Your pussy starts spasming around him. You throw your head back, feeling your tightened core close to unwinding. Yoongi's cock twitches inside you in the seconds following before you both have your release.

Yoongi takes himself out of you, cock dripping with your cum. Your breaths are heavy as you blink up at him from your reclined position. "First time fucking in a car?" he asks, monotone.

"Mhm."

"Did you like it?"

"Mhm."

"Good, I'll give you a few minutes to gather yourself."

Once you both manage to make yourself presentable again, you head back to the reception.

"Where the fuck have you been?!" Yeong-Ja hollers at Yoongi, rushing to him through the parking lot. You're startled at her sharp tone but the closer she gets the more your stomach feels unsettled.

She doesn't give you a glance at all, her attention fully on Yoongi. "Min," she starts. Odd of her to be calling him by his last name all the sudden. "We need to leave now."

You dart your eyes at the two of them. "What-what's going on? It hasn't been that long, did something happen?" Yeong-Ja hesitates to answer so you turn to the man next to you. "Yoongi–Oh my god!" You screech when you see a glowing, red dot hovering over his heart.

Yoongi follows your line of sight. "Shit–" He curses under his breath. "Of all fucking times."

Okay, what the fuck is going on?

Yeong-Ja swiftly pulls out a gun from what appears to be a thigh holster. When she does, you spot the same bobcat tattoo on her upper thigh.

Yeong-Ja cocks the gun before aiming it to the far left. She takes the shot, the red dot instantly disappearing from Yoongi's chest.

"You don't know Yoongi very well __." Yeong-Ja lowers her gun ever so slightly. "To the outside, he's Min Yoongi, a reserved and calculative data analyst, best man to your boss Kim Seokjin. But to the inside world, he's Agust D, leader of the most feared mafia gang, Bangtan."

"I'm sorry sweetheart," Yoongi says. "I wanted to spare you from this. But now that you know our dirty little secret we can't possibly let you go."

So she's his right-hand man.

When Yoongi said they were coworkers, this was not what you were expecting.

How the fuck do you get out of this?

Masterlist

A/N: Me through this whole thing...how do I write warnings without giving away the ending? Anyway, tysm for reading and LMK what you think 💞

Note: Pls help me decide if i should turn this into a series of keep it a one shot ➡ vote here ☺

no reposting, copying, or translating my work– © kookslastbutton

[agnesmontague]

tmp - tma connection theory

i do not claim full credit for this as @anthonyampersand and i were bigbraining it (and screaming) in chat together but our current theory for how Archives and Protocol connect are as follows :

tl;dr : TMP and TMA are a setup for each other's premise respectively, feeding into each other like an ouroboros. we know that TMP is on some level a "sequel" to TMA (i.e. celia may possibly "remember" events from TMA that we know to have "already happened", such as the eyepocalypse) but it's entirely possible that events in TMP will influence those in TMA in turn, without much concern for actual temporality.

more specifically : it appears, at least so far in the canon, that fears in the TMP universe haven't really split themselves into categories the way they do in TMA. we've seen a case that sounds an awful lot like a Slaughter statement (the bloodthirsty violin), with others that overlap across several Smirke Fears (the very first one read by norris is a healthy mix of Stranger and Lonely, it appears to me), and others that don't strike me as being any particular fear (a malicious, hungering liminal space...? Spiral, Lonely, Extinction...?).

this is ironic because, well, the protagonists' very job is to do that kind of categorization. Dolls comma Watching, or Dolls comma Skin? it's the very type of job that smirke himself seems to have tried to undertake in TMA-verse (and ultimately succeeded). which means....

maybe there ISN'T any fear-categorization in this world prior to the OIAR. maybe, in the end, the way to "defeat" whatever Fear(s) stalk this world is to split it up into little parts that antagonize each other, and then send them away. in short, the OIAR crew are who will send the Fears into the TMA-verse in the form we see them in TMA.

there are some other indications that time may be a flat circle here. why did lynne hammond suddenly change her name to celia in s5 of TMA? why would it suddenly "feel right" to her out of the blue, unless it was the name she vaguely remembered using Elsewhere? of course, since TMA was written before TMP was even conceptualized, it's not extremely likely that it was some kind of deliberate foreshadowing back then ; it is however possible that they took this little detail to build TMP to fit "retroactively" with it. the archives of the magnus institute in TMP-verse being pristine and free of papers could indicate a sending-away or timeline-wide interference as well. and to say nothing of hilltop road, of course...

the tagline for TMP is "Fear takes many forms". sure, it's a pun (fear receives a lot of paperwork). but perhaps it's also a warning for what's to come. fear takes on many forms, in TMP--perhaps even as many as fifteen?

[penvisions]

gone to the dogs {chapter 3}

Pairing: Boston QZ! Joel Miller x F! Reader ; Implied Boston QZ! Joel Miller x Tess Servopoulos

Summary: A person from your past makes you feel the changes that transformed you into what you are today. A meal shared feels like another change is coming.

Word Count: 4.9k

Warnings: canon typical violence, canon typical language, canon typical gore, outbreak fic, age gap (only by about ten years), dark fic, dark joel miller, mean joel miller, joel miller is uptight, degrading language, sexual language, heated interactions, adult language, fighting, argumentative language, mutual disdain, sexual content, implication of sex work, unprotected piv (mentioned), sexual acts, reader is snarky, reader meets joel toe-to-toe with insults and it's amazing both reader and joel pov, lemme know if there are any i missed!

A/N: this honestly came out of nowhere. i haven't been writing lately beyond jotting down scene notes and vague ideas,so i've taken a step back from forming actual chapters for the many wips i have at the moment. but this was a good thing to get down amid all the stress of preparing to move for the second time in three months

ao3 link || series masterlist || joel miller masterlist || ko-fi

You step back a few paces, instincts reminding you of the last time you saw the man. He looked older, older than he should if only seven years went by. But the stresses of the world made each one seem like a lifetime.

But upon closer inspection, as you realize that maybe he looks…actually in better shape than when you had seen him last. But not being covered in dirt and grime was an easy difference. No, though, he looked healthy. Far better off than your rumpled and stark appearance.

He says your real name and you feel something soften deep inside. You hadn’t heard your actual name since…no, you cut the thought off, not wanting to think anymore about anything to do with the day you lost your brother. You feel the watching eyes of Joel and Tess as the meeting with strangers turns into anything but. Your connection with one of the men seemingly the last of the outcomes they had anticipated.

“Cane.” You correct him. “My name is- it’s Cane.”

“I can call you that, if you prefer. I’m just so glad you’re okay. When that raider dragged you off, I thought-“

“I got away.” You cut him off, not wanting to reveal the way you had ended up being a resident of the Boston Quarantine Zone. It wasn’t important, it was personal, and it was no one’s business but your own now, how it had come to be the reality of your life. It hadn’t been the first blood you spilled but it had certainly been the beginning of the path you walked and paced and snarled your way around today. He must sense your snub, the way you don’t want to dwell on the past. He nods once, eyes glinting as he takes in the two figures behind you. His eyes focus on Tess, a nod to her in greeting as he connects a face to the voice he had been conversing with for a few weeks now.

Frank turns to Bill, his counterpart on the other side of the fence. Allowing you to let out a huff of breath in relief at the passed moment. Or so you thought, Joel’s eyes were heavy on you. Far too weighted and far too vigilant as he no doubt picks up more than the exchange had been.

“Let’s, Bill, let’s get them inside. Get Cane into the shower, you look a little rough around the edges. You didn’t run into any trouble did you?”

The feeling of water cascading hot from the shower head and down your aching body was something you thought you’d never get to experience again. It was such a rare occurrence to get even lukewarm water in the zone, the water pressure weak.

A soft knock sounded through the hush of water, followed by Frank asking if you were comfortable with him coming into the bathroom. You call out a muffled affirmative, body beginning to ache from the way you had trudged through the night to get to the cordoned off city, especially after the way large hands had roughly pushed and pulled at you atop Joel’s shared bed.

“I just…wanted a second alone with you.” The man broke the heavy silence as he settled on a small bench in the room, opposite the vanity. He was worried, you could sense that much.

“That’s okay, it’s your house and I don’t mind.”

“…it could be your house too….if you wanted.”

On the other side of the door, Joel tries to keep his breathing light as he listens in on the conversation. A feeling of protectiveness hard to squash as he saw the other man slink off in search of you. There was something between you two, a shared past. A worry the other man felt entitled to have over you, the utterance of a name foreign to him but meant something to you. Joel wasn’t sure what to think, the way Tess had described him had been all positive and hopeful, a potential trading partner for things they couldn’t find in the rubble of the city remains or within the walls of the zone.

A connection to you was the last thing he had expected out of this trip. And he was on high alert for any issues that might bring to light. He keeps his eyes trained on the end of the upstairs hall, instincts telling him that Bill knows he hadn’t really been in search of a restroom for himself. Another dog with something to protect, with something to defend and fight for. The two men far more alike than they would want to admit and they had only just met. Your voice is quiet, something he had only ever experienced when he walked in on you and Tess alone. So used to you projecting it, to speaking loudly to ensure people heard you and understood the intent behind them.

The vulnerability with a man you obviously knew isn’t lost on him.

“Don’t think Bill would like that.” Cutting under his offer, you want him to realize that it would never work, his life is set up here due to the other man. Even if you were to be minimally evasive and keep to yourself, it was a life you weren’t sure you deserved let alone were worthy of being offered. It would be a disturbance to their way of life, from the gardens they tended to the house they obviously shared as their own.

“Yeah, but even so. We could convince him, if that’s something you’d be interested in. I don’t…I don’t like the thought of you all alone in the zone, fighting everyday for things you deserve to have…”

“I found my brother, I’ll be fine, I promise.”

“Did…I just…I’m sorry to ask but are you- okay after-“

“Yes.”

“It’s okay if you’re not, you know. That kind of thing, that violence changes people.”

“I am…okay, for the most part. Change or no change.”

“You don’t…I just want you to know you have a place here. If you’re…resorting to certain things.” His words are hesitant, but firm. He knows you, had known you through your college years. He had been an artist of local renown, in Baltimore. Where you had moved to go to college and stayed after you graduated. You worked with him in his own studio, helped him to organize classes for those interested in the arts and helped to manage his small gallery. But that was a lifetime ago, a paintbrush traded for the butt of a gun in your palm. A flash of teeth in a gummy smile you had offered too easily exchanged for the snarling of teeth as you bared them for anyone who threatened you.

It was a lifetime ago, the turn of your age into the next decade of your life bringing endless and adaptive change. If it was for the better you weren’t sure, but your survival was dependent on it and that’s all that mattered.

Joel feels a tightness in his chest, the inference of the man’s words of violence that had been acted out on a younger version of yourself not settling well, violence that ripped you from the one person who you had been with at the end of the world. The weight of the realization like rocks in his stomach, churning around in his middle. More weight is added as he hears the admittance of you’re the activities he had caught you in the act of doing to earn ration cards, of the activities he had been all too willing to indulge in with you just the night before.

“I don’t like doing it, but it’s kind of a ‘use what ya got’ kinda world now.”

“Cane…”

“It’s fine, I’m not…I’m not bothered by it.”

“Honey, of course you are. Anybody would be. We used to- we used to spend our days painting and setting up gallery shows and that- that’s gone from the world now. There is no more art, there is no more humanity, there is only-“

“I’m not anybody.” You feel your lips part in a show of teeth, hissing the words out as anger flares and memories of a time passed cross your mind. You were so naïve, to think the world would allow you to be who you wanted. For anyone to be who they wanted, but now it molds you into something inhumane, weather you find yourself infected or not. “I’m a survivor and I have power in the zone, with or without those I traveled with here today.”

“Okay….I’ll let you finish washing up and I’ll get you a change of clothes, that sound alright?”

“….thank you, Frankie.”

“Of course, anything for you. Always.”

Thoughts of a younger you set in front of a large canvas atop an easel flashes before Joel’s eyes as he quietly descends the stairs. A paintbrush replacing the commonality of a gun in your grip, light in your eyes instead of a dark threat. It was an uncomfortable one, to find out just how much you had been altered. He knew the pain of being transformed beyond recognition and he hated for the knowledge of your past as it burrowed into his brain and refused to leave.

A table is set up outside, Frank insisting on enjoying the gentle breeze that graced the day. A lace trimmed white tablecloth atop it for dishes and wine glasses and cloth napkins to be set atop. A meal to try and tide the churning waters of an agreement, the combining of two factions. Everyone is seated at one of the four sides of the small table, an extra chair beside Frank for you two to share one.

Bill’s back is to the house, to allow him a full view of the street and surrounding area within the gate of his land. Joel is opposite him and to your right, Tess is across from you. It’s all so close an imitation of family dinners you used to have before you left to embark on your own life. Though the people surrounding you couldn’t be any different.

The four of them had fallen silent at your appearance once you came down the steps. Hands itching to run over and smooth down the flowing fabric of the dress Frank had gifted you to change into. A white, floral-patterned fabric you would’ve once fawned over. But now it feels like some sick, twisted joke even if you knew the man hadn’t intended for it to be taken that way. He had been working off memories of your preferences, not knowing who you were now.

Tess’s lips had lifted at the corners, though she hid it well at the way your eyes had cut through her when you heard the small chuckle she had tamped down on. Joel’s eyes had roved over you, an expression unreadable and far too harsh in the daylight back outside. Frank had been elated, praising how well it fit you and he was so glad it was the right size, that the pattern looked lovely and you cleaned up nicely. Bill had nodded along, most likely warned by his partner to be nice to you, though he hadn’t looked to thrilled that you had been left alone inside his home. He seemed so much like Joel, though there was no worry for him to reach out and grab you by the throat.

“Well, this really is just- it- it’s amazing.” You keep your eyes downcast at your place setting, the way Tess stumbled over her words unfamiliar. She was trying so hard to keep her own tendency to come off as threatening out of her demeanor and you wondered if it was closer to the that of the woman she had once been. Shirking herself back into that mindset in order to appeal to the men whose trade you admittedly, desperately needed.

The city is getting more dangerous to scavenge as time continues on. Supplies and even everyday items so scarce it doesn’t justify the risk of sneaking out of the zone much. You worry for the future, as things only seem to be getting more dire. As the hangings increase, as the Fireflies gain traction and power among the unrest.

“Right?” Frank smiles so openly and brightly at her across from you, reaching for the bottle of wine in the middle of the table. He reaches over to fill the half-empty crystal glass before her, the scent of it strong as it catches in the wind. You take the final sip of your own glass, catching Joel’s gaze out of the corner of your eye. You feel more than see the way his eyes trace the stain of the dark wine on your lips, how it dampens them as it clings to the plush of your bottom lip. How he shifts in his seat as you swipe your tongue over it to collect the errant drops.

“Mhm.”

“Can you not, please?” Joel’s eyes shift to the gun gripped tightly in Bill’s hand atop the table. Frank’s as well, an exasperated edge in his voice. The roll of his eyes he tries to fight making warmth flare in your chest for being able to recall it so clearly and aimed at you in the past. He’s much the same man he was when you knew him, but almost…happier now despite the fall of the world. He’s found his person and that does change people, you can see it in his boosted confidence and comfortability. He’s protected here, until he wishes not to be.

“I’m the same way.” Joel offers, to bridge the gap and mind the tension in the air.

“Oh, you’re a paranoid schizophrenic too?” Frank chuckles, shoulder bumping yours but you don’t join him in the banter. You feel wildly out of place, aside from having to share an edge of the table. It had been so long since you sat down at a clean table, a dressed table laden down with crystal glasses and fine ceramic. A meal made from scratch, hot and actually tasting like food.

“I’m not schizophrenic.”

“Sure.” Frank moves to fill your glass at the nod of your head, he knows you favored red once upon a time, the perfect paring for the meal Bill had been kind enough to offer you all.

Tess clears her throat and it strikes something in you. She’s acting more like she does when she’s alone with you, letting the glimpse of who she is shine amongst the pair. It’s easy to see now why Joel is by her side, she’s much better spoken than you. She’s good at knowing what to do and when. But then again she does have a decade on you much like he does. More experience in a world that had been whole and allowed for different skills.

“Well, can I just say, uh, gun aside, which I get, by the way.” A nod to Bill, to let him know he’s seen and understood. “How nice this is to have a civilized meal in such a, a beautiful place. It’s been so long.”

The unspoken but very loud ‘can’t get these two to stay in the same room long enough to even eat rations without an argument breaking out’ sentiment hits you like a brick wall. She knows, is the first thought you have, and it freezes the blood in your veins. She knows what you and Joel did but she hadn’t voiced it or confronted you about it. Perhaps she confronted him or had just known the second she walked into the apartment last night but either way, you know you have to be honest when she approaches you.

“I just wanna say, uh, thank you. Even if we don’t end up working together. Which I wouldn’t fault you, these two tend to rub some people the wrong way. I really needed this.”

“We are working together.” Frank raises his own glass to mirror hers, his other hand reaching for yours atop the table to shake it gently and reassuringly. “We are. Even if Cane hadn’t turned out to be the third party of your group. Though it was such a pleasant surprise.”

They clink their glasses together, urging you to do so as well. Your glass now full for a second time as well.

“You know what? Let’s go inside. Tess, I wanna show you something.”

“Actually I have been…waiting to see inside.”

“No. Not inside.” Bill tries to reign them in but neither are paying much attention to the table anymore, already getting up from their seats, full wine glasses in hand.

“Darling, do you want to join us?” Frank offers, reaching for your hand to help you up. But you shake your head, not wanting to go back inside so soon.

“Oh, um, no thank you. The fresh air is…”

“Of course,” He slides a hand over your shoulder, comforting and grounding.

Bill calls out his name once, then again with more force as they begin to walk away from the table, leaving the controlled setting. Both parties are laughing as they disappear inside the house with their wine glasses. He huffs as he looks from you to Joel, not having anticipated this course of events.

“I understand.” Joel speaks up across from him. He’s chewing a bite he had just taken, a second helping taken when offered still on his plate. He doesn’t even look in your direction, his attention solely on the other man at the table. “If my, uh…if mine…brought strangers into our situation, I wouldn’t be happy either.”

“Thought this one was yours.” Bill tips his head in your direction, genuine curiosity thinly veiled in his tone.

“No. This one is on her own.” His voice hardens, giving away his distaste for the insinuation.

“I’m no ones, certainly not his.” You feel the need to speak up, not willing to let them both talk about you as if you weren’t right there. It was not only insulting, but to insinuate that you could be anybody’s was more than aggravating. Joel ignores you, but Bill’s eyes meet yours briefly, gauging you silently.

“But of all the people he could’ve found on the radio, we’re actually decent people just tryin’ to get by.”

“Oh, well aren’t I the lucky one.” Bill scoffs, eyes trained back on Joel and remaining.

“There’s stuff we have in the zone that you don’t have here. Books, medicine, machine parts. We can help each other and get that gun outta my face.” There’s a hint of the man he is in the zone as his voice pitches low, a threat that he would act on in a heartbeat with the slightest inclination. Bill heeds the threat, knowing he would meet it head on. Both aware of the fragility of the situation, both aware of their people inside the house alone with each other and getting along. Bill concedes and the gun is locked before placed back in its holster.

“So, what, you were a…prepper or somethin’?”

“’Survivalist’.” Bill doesn’t continue eating, like Joel does. Ever the picture of controlled ease as he chews bite after bite on his plate. But the language of his body is obvious to you, he’s primed and ready to lunge, ready to fight, to kill. Something you had washed off in the shower with the appearance of someone you once thought long dead. “Maybe you are decent people, Frank vehemently vouches for her. But maybe you aren’t and maybe she’s changed. Doesn’t matter. We’re self-sufficient here. I don’t need you or your friend, or her complicating our lives. Is that clear?”

Even if you aren’t focused on one of them for more than a moment, eyes flitting between them evenly, you see the way Joel glances at the perimeter fence. Seeing something you don’t or can’t, had seen since first approaching it, keeping it to himself and only revealing it with his next words.

“That fence has got a year on it, tops. The galvanized wire already started to corrode. I can get you ten spools of high-tensile aluminum. Last you the rest of your life.” He seems to think better of his words and with another swallow of chewed food, remedies it. “Lives.”

The realization that Joel could be polite, he could be cordial, and he could assert himself in a nonviolent way to appeal to someone and get what he wants without shedding blood, breaking bones, or slinging harsh words is a hard realization. All you’ve known from him is backhanded comments about your skills, about your willingness to let them into the world you had helped shape in the zone. Someone who had come in with the intention of asserting his dominance over those already in charge had faltered only when you showed your own teeth. And he never let you forget the way you had showed your belly to allow them to be a part of it, no matter how mutually beneficial the situation was.

He saw you as weak and it’s glaringly apparent in the way that he tries to appeal to the man across from him now. A man who has things Joel has set his sights on, wants to get his hands on. But it’s much more than them both being men, it’s much more than them both being so similar in nature. It’s about the respect they have for each other, it’s as plain as day. The commonality of a kinder and gentler handler of a partner at their sides. Someone to protect that have bonded with each other.

It further proves how alone you truly are. The wine sours in your stomach, the food spoils and you excuse yourself from the table. Bill’s hand is back over the gun holstered to his side but pushes up out of his chair and follows you. Joel watches until as the man follows you to where you had sought space on the curb of the street, his brow furrowing and his mouth turning down as he thinks you’ve just ruined any hope of finding agreement.

“Save it, neither of you have even considered what I have-“

“Look, I’m not much for being honest these days. The world doesn’t care anymore and I never did even before it fell. But,” He’s sitting down beside you, a grunt at the low level nearly flush with the ground. A few feet separate you, but you understand the meaning of him doing so. Willingly putting himself beside you and at a disadvantage should you be brave enough to try something.

“I wasn’t willing to even entertain the thought of reaching out on the radio. But Frank was determined to wade through the signals. And he did all of it in search of you. He’s devoted so much time to finding you, alive or dead. And when he couldn’t find word, he didn’t leave the bed for weeks. He’s been haunted by your ghost since the day he stumbled onto my land. And yet, God delivered you to him alongside two people offering trade. You say I think of you as fodder, but you don’t know me. I may not really know you, but I know what you mean to Frank. That makes this worth the trouble and the risk. Not some one trying to appeal to me across the table, not some woman who Frank is set on impressing. It’s you. I can see through the act of that one back at the table a mile away, he’s behaving though he doesn’t want to. But you haven’t tried to hide you who are, what you are.”

“I didn’t feel the need to, not here, not with Frankie.”

“I know you may not be the same person he remembers and share stories with, but he’s gone through all the efforts to set this up. He was going to ask them if they had any word of you, he never gave up hope that somehow you had survived that raider tearing you out if his grip as you both ran from the ambush of their group. Something tells me you have the sway the two with you think they have, have become accustomed to because you allow them to reap the rewards of it.”

“It’s a partnership. Protection for equal shares of everything. I provide the knowledge. One person alone can’t hold their own any longer, certainly not in the zone.”

“You have the knowledge.” He agrees quietly, his eyes locking with yours as you look over at him.

“We’re you runnin’ off to?” Joel’s voice doesn’t startle you, but it’s unexpected in the doorway of the back porch. You had slipped out of your room the second you were sure everyone had been settled long enough to sleep, or at least resolve themselves to trying to rest for the night. It can’t be easy for either Joel or Bill to rest knowing the other doesn’t trust them, but you hadn’t anticipated anyone leaving their rooms at the late hour. Stars twinkle above in the sky, visible through the windows unobstructed by screens. You had just wanted to come out and see them, get some fresh air.

“Didn’t want to impose.” Your voice is quiet, though not in meekness, it’s swathed in the worry of waking a house full of people.

“We were offered rooms for the night, wouldn’t call that imposing.” He exhales heavily as he moves to stand beside where you are before one of the large panes of glass, looking out. “Besides, Frank seems to be easy on you, doubt he would say no to anything you needed.”

“Yeah, well, room’s too big, house is too big.” He watches you, catching the sight of your eyes tracing the landscape bathed in night and shadows. You absently wonder if he can smell the body wash you had used earlier, different from your own back in the zone but had washed the lingering scent of him on your skin all the same.

“Can’t get outta the gate on your own.”

“No, but it’s better than being stuck in that house.”

“It bothers you.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Truly, you don’t. There’s no way he’s privy to the feelings and desperation to push down memories of the past that have endlessly bubbled up today, trying to drown you as they reach for the surface.

“Don’t play dumb, we both know you’re not.” His hands rest on his hips, the clinking of his belt buckle ever present loud in the silence of the night. Of the open land just beyond the enclosed porch. “You’re uncomfortable because they’re in a room and me ‘n Tess are in one.”

“I couldn’t care less about the sleeping arrangements.”

“Then what is it?”

“It doesn’t matter.” You think to tell him of how suffocating it was in that room, not because you were alone but because of how much it reminds you of where you used to live. But Joel isn’t one for you to be open with, to share honestly with. He’s been nothing but demeaning when it comes to any humanity you dare to show, conversations with Tess cut short the second he opens the door to wherever you are. The reason you don’t linger or share meals, the reason you don’t know why he had allowed for last night’s activities to happen and now they feel heavy, like a mistake you had let yourself fall into that never should have happened.

“Cane.” When you don’t respond, he voices the name Frank had called from behind the fence when he recognized you. It’s like an arrow to the heart, striking true and killing that part of you all over again. A name you had never expected to be called again, let alone by Joel Miller as he tries to get you to speak plainly with him. For once and never likely again.

“Drop it.” Your voice rasps, the scream you feel building in your chest desperately trying to break free.

“Not until you tell me.”

“Just because your mouth’s been on me-“

“That’s not what this- Jesus, fine, be difficult like you always are. I’m goin’ back inside.” He’s turning away, stepping toward the back steps. You hear the sound of his boots on the wood but only the first step before he’s whipping back around with a glare. “If this falls through, it’s on you. Not me and not Tess, you. And if that’s the case, maybe you should begin to consider that offer to stay here. And if that doesn’t pan out, don’t come crawling back to us.”

You don’t look at him or think of telling him the deal has been made because of you, and his steps take him further away from you, leaving you to sit on the outdoor furniture that reminds you too much of your old home. Of the one you once shared with family, of the one you had shared with Franke. Both more than likely just rubble or overtaken by twisted and decayed cordyceps. You feel the scream thicken your throat, swelling it up to make you try to gasp out for air to release it but it comes out as a harsh prattling sob. Your resolve to be strong cracking for the first time in years.

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[marigoldwriter]

Wonderland: Places we haven't seen, Unknown locations and Relating different media.

(I haven't read the book, so if you finish reading this and want to add something that's in the book and I don't know, please comment)

If there's one thing I know we can't do when it comes to the Wonderland of the Descendants universe, it's rely on the description from the 1951 film.

In the official description on the website Fandom in Disney Wiki, Wonderland is described as: "It is an imaginary land created from a dream a young girl named Alice experiences. Wonderland is a world without any form of logic, inhabited by fantastical creatures, anthropomorphic animals, and a slew of colorful characters. The fearsome Queen of Hearts rules the land."

So, originally, Wonderland wasn't even a place of its own, but rather the creation of a little girl's dream.

And it's exactly here that we establish that the Wonderland 1951 film and the Wonderland we know aren't the same. Pretty obvious, right?

But still, some things from the 1951 Wonderland need to be considered. I think we'll come back to that along the way.

Now, all that's left for us is Wonderland from the 2015 film. Oh, I love that film, it was because I rewatched it that I decided to write this, anyway.

In the official description on the website Fandom in Disney Wiki, Wonderland is described as: "It is a nonsensical realm populated by humans, talking animals and plants, and other magical beings. Laws of physics don't always make sense in Underland."

And there's this difference between the Wonderland of 1951 and the one of 2015, the name of Wonderland isn't even Wonderland for the citizens there, "In Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland, Underland is true name for the world Alice Kingsleigh once referred to as "Wonderland", but it is revealed that she misheard the name as "Wonderland" when she was a child."

If we focus on the details, the entrance to the Rabbit Hole is in the middle of a huge, healthy tree in the middle of a forest in Descendants, but in the 2015 film, it's on a wealthy family's estate — "This entrance is located on the Ascot family property, in a rabbit hole in the ground by a tree nearby the mansion. If someone falls in the hole, it will lead them to the Round Hall in Underland. The hole is stuffed with furniture of many sizes, from small table lamps, a bed, and even a piano; some furniture is positioned on the walls of the hole, while others are just floating in midair."

So what happened to the Ascot Family? I mean, they were assholes, but anyway, what happened to them? Did they move after Auradon was built? Or, Idk, Bridget uses a different Rabbit Hole, maybe.

In the official page on the website Fandom in Disney Wiki, it's said that: "Underland is a far more nonsensical world than the one Alice remembered, and it has a solid geography, divided between many regions, including Marmoreal (southeast), Crims (center north), Witzend (west), Iplam (center west), Queast (east), Snud (south), and the Outlands (far west). The Crimson Sea is situated directly north of Underland."

The 2015 Wonderland is much richer in information, so let's ask a few questions. The questions here are:

Where's the Castle of Hearts located in Descendants? It's in Crims, It's in Witzend, childhood home of the two Queens, it's near or far from the Crimson Sea?

If Bridget, Queen of Hearts, is referred as "Your Imperial Majesty", it means that all the other regions of Wonderland were conquered at some point and united into a single Empire/Kingdom. How?

What happened to Mirana (the White Queen)? She was killed, she fled to Auradon, what was her fate?

What about Marmoreal, and the White Queen's servants and subjects?

What about all the other regions? We don't hear about them, so what happened?

Did our famous Red Queen, Iracebeth, ever exist? She is an ancient Queen from a bygone era?

How the hell did they manage to unite all the kingdoms? Obviously through brute force but how? That would have taken decades, at most a century, so how do we have the Wonderland Empire/Kingdom perfectly united in 2025?!

What happened to the Red Queen? If two tyrannical forces that have the same objective face each other and one of them loses, we obviously already know who it was.

Where was the Kingdom of Hearts at this time before they simply became the largest and only kingdom in Wonderland?

Since I don't have an answer to these questions yet, I'll delve into some regions of Underland, and at the same time I will make some notes:

First, we have the Marmoreal Region, important places that we have located here are:

The White Queen's Castle

"This castle is where Queen Mirana lives, along with her court and army. Its architecture seems to be inspired by the pieces and the board of a chess game, and it seems to be entirely built of marble, with a predominant white color. The castle is surrounded by tall waterfalls, and large gardens."

I would really like to know what happened to Marmoreal, It was a kingdom completely against the Red Queen, so they were the ones who always fought against these type of tyranny, despite both being related by blood (Mirana and Iracebeth were sisters, so), could the two kingdoms have united against the Kingdom of Hearts at some point? Very unlikely.

And if we take some facts from Lewis Carroll's books, there were three kingdoms: The White, the Red, and the of Hearts. So what happened to the rulers of these two kingdoms? Because one of them definitely survived and emerged victorious.

Tarrant Hightopp's (Mad Hatter) House

"Located near the White Queen's castle, the house of Tarrant Hightopp rests atop a cliff surrounded by waterfalls and green mountains. The entire house is modeled to resemble a top hat."

This just makes me think that Maddox's surename is actually Hightopp. And that he probably really grew up in a house like that.

But now, seriously, Maddox is an adult, while Redell is a teenager, so he and Bridget must be pretty close in age, so I wonder, when does Alice in Wonderland take place in the Descendants universe? It still doesn't make sense, but it's Wonderland anyway.

Next we have the Crims Region, important places that we have located here are:

Salazen Grum

"Salazen Grum is the castle and former home of Queen Iracebeth, who lived there with her court, servants, and army. The castle seems to be entirely built from stone, with red as a predominant color. It had gardens with many red roses and hedges cut into the shape of the Red Queen herself. After the Red Queen's reign ended, she was banished to the Outlands, and the castle fell to ruin."

I would really like to know if all these kingdoms were ruled by people who were related. Mirana and Iracebeth were sisters, but what if the ruler of Hearts was also related by blood to them?

Well, if they were related by blood, they are no longer so, because of the amount of centuries that must have passed (no one can convince me that Iracebeth and Mirana didn't live longer than a normal human being), in any case, they are now extremely distant relatives.

Salazen Grum seems to be the place that the Queen of Hearts would take to renovate and transform into her own castle, although I disagree with that, because it seems that the Castle of Hearts is located in Marmoreal, due to the trees and the abundant nature around.

House of the March Hare

"Located in the Tulgey Wood, the House of the March Hare is a windmill in ruins. This place was once surrounded by lush trees and beautiful flowers, but is now a gloomy wasteland. This is where Tarrant Hightopp, Thackery Earwicket, Mallymkun, and Chessur enjoy each others company by drinking tea and eating cakes. Alice Kingsleigh visited this place when she first came to Underland when she was a child, and again when she was a young adult."

In my defense, I know that the March Hare House is mentioned or referenced in the book "Descendants: Beyond the Isle of the Lost", and it's probably more renovated, but it is worth mentioning anyway.

Gummer Slough/The Chess Board

"On the Frabjous Day, this large chess board served as the battle ground for the final clash between the armies of the White and Red Queens'. It was also here where Alice Kingsleigh slayed the Jabberwocky."

THIS PLACE DEFINITELY EXISTS IN WONDERLAND DESCENDANTS, NOBODY CAN CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE!!

No one can convince me that the War of the Roses were not fought right here. Any beginnings of conflict must be fought in this place, it's a cultural rule of Wonderland and no one can convince me otherwise.

Third, we have the Witzend Region, this region was introduced in the second film.

Witzend Town

"This town was ruled by Iracebeth and Mirana's parents, King Oleron and Queen Elsemere. The region was populated mostly by humans, though some talking animals lived here as well. It was the original home of the Mad hatter himself, Tarrant Hightopp, his family, and their hat shop. The entire town and surrounding forest was burned to the ground by the Jabberwocky during the Horunvendush Day (the day the Red Queen took control of Underland), and is currently abandoned."

Well, for the most part, this city is populated by humans, so many core characters can unfold here. It could be around here that the Castle of Hearts could be located, since many humans are seen in the "Red" music video.

Witzend Castle

"This castle was located in the Witzend Town and the home of King Oleron and Queen Elsemere and the childhood home of the princesses Iracebeth and Mirana."

As I said, this could be where the Castle of Hearts is located, it is similar, but I can't say, the times are different perhaps, but the same place.

♡ ♡ ♡

There are many questions, the geography of Descendants Wonderland is not very explicit, there are some places mentioned in the book, such as:

Rabbit Hole.

The Queen of Heart's Castle and royal plaza.

Maddox Hatter's room and workshop.

Tulgey Wood.

March Hare's Residence.

White Rabbit's House.

Wonderland High.

Bramble Bay.

Looking Glass Mountain.

Vorpal Mountain.

Most of them reference both the 1951 and 2015 films, so we can assume a lot. The real question is how all the kingdoms were united into one, and where the other rulers are, or rather, what happened to them, since they probably either fled or were killed by the ruler of the Kingdom of Hearts.

And also how we can understand this better. If anyone is willing to talk about this for hours, or make a world map of what Wonderland looks like today, with Bridget as the current Queen, I'm available!

Was it long? It was, but I wanted to write something like this because I was really intrigued by what Wonderland looks like from above, and the geography and locales of this peculiar place, since we spend more time in Auradon than anywhere else in all the Descendants movies.

Heart-shaped kisses for those of you who read until the end, thanks my dears ~ 💋

[zorlovinghue]

Hiii just discovered your blog (because of TCF/LCF) and just had to ask - where is your profile pic from? And do you have any other recs like ‘The Malicious Member is Back’ because I started reading it after seeing it in your posts and am loving it so far :D

Hallooo! My profile picture is Do Seojoon from [I Became the Youngest Member of Top Idol]/[My Comeback as the Youngest Member]! He is the older brother of the MC, Do SeohanXD

If you're interested with this one, get ready to face how strikingly different the novel and manhwa is, but overall it's all good!

Other recommendations you might want to give a try to:

In This Life, The Greatest Star In The Universe

I'm a Genius Idol But My Passive is a Sunfish

Debut or Die

The Trashy PD has to Survive as an Idol

You might already know Debut or Die since it is the biggest in fandom too, plot-wise all of these have more progression while not very heavy to follow. With [I'm a Genius Idol but My Passive is a Sunfish] and [I Became the Youngest Member of Top Idol] being the lighter ones. I love all of them. Very much. If you're looking for a character with typical krs!Cale or Cale!krs morally grey tendency, then Seo Hoyun from [The Trashy PD has to Survive as an Idol] will be a good start to familiarize yourself. (personal feeling but this one actually got the best of me from how similarly coded he is, even the 'blackmailing'/'scamming' and 'taking advantage of someone but actually cares for them along the way' is strikingly more pronounced:D)

Surprisingly, [Debut or Die], [The Malicious Member is Back], [I Became The Youngest Member of Top Idol] are the three where the group is build up through Idol competition. While the others are making a comeback after trouble or more agency-focus debut-trainee if you did not want to go through another musings for who would likely debut in the end. Which is, fun and engaging either way!

[Debut or Die]'s Park Moondae is literally Kim Rok Soo in some unique ways.... But, hmm, maybe more of a reliable narrator in comparison? As reliable as it can be with his personality.

If you want different characterization, as in cute and adorable MC instead of the genius and cynical characters, [I Became the Youngest Member of Top Idol]'s Do Seohan and [I'm a Genius Idol but My Passive is a Sunfish]'s Han Baekya are remarkably some refreshing change! Where as [In This Life, The Greatest Star In The Universe]'s MC Sun Woo-Joo is more heartwarming. I think these three are actually the most mentally sounds and healthy out of others, which is sparsely seen these days.

Each of these recommendations is refreshing and is impactful in their approaches. And I personally eager to tell you that all of them are worth reading for!

[Debut or Die], [I Became the Youngest Member of Top Idol], and [In This Life, The Greatest Star in the Universe] already got manhwa adaptation, so if you need more visuals feel free to give it a long shot to go!

It's most likely that I'll missed many points considering it's been a while since I catch up, I strongly advised to take my words with a grain of salt and take a look yourself for a better judgement<3

p.s. If you want to have the Coughing Up Blood shenanigans, [The Trashy PD has to Survive as an Idol] and [I'm a Genius Idol but My Passive is a Sunfish] will give you exactly that! I'm not sure about the latter since I haven't read much but the probability is high! >///< if you want a character who's constantly in the danger of death then [Debut or Die] took it seriously with its premise lmaooo

[onesidedradiostatic]

Val has broken Vox's screen multiple times in anger stop acting like they're cute and healthy with "equal power dynamics" he's a rapist abuser that doesn't just go away💀

oh man I did not come in here to get into discourse. first of all, I haven't been in the fandom for long, my main source of content is from the canon show itself. from what I've heard, those instagram stories are non-canon now and their dynamic in the show itself is a bit different. secondly, yes, val is a rapist abuser, and never once did I deny that, but you have to remember that vox is also NOT A GOOD PERSON. I actually would like to bring attention to this post specifically regarding that. but to put it short, he enables val's actions, his very introduction involves a product that lets you PEEP ON NEIGHBOURS. I do not in fact think they are cute, wholesome and healthy. they're both horrible people. the reason I call their power dynamic balanced is because of their interactions in episode 2, vox isn't shown to be afraid of val at all, he just acts annoyed, and isn't afraid of shouting at him to his face or saying "fuck you" to him, val does not react negatively to this either. val doesn't hold power over him, there is no clear power imbalance compared to val and angel. from what I've seen so far personally, I do not view vox as being a victim of val's. he's capable of using manipulative language to get val to stop what he was about to do, pinches his cheek with zero fear, and unremorsefully offers to call up the lowest earners for val to shoot.

if you disagree? that's fine. if you don't feel comfortable with the ship? that's also perfectly fine! here are things you can do:

- filter #voxval

- filter #staticmoth

- block me

I state in my bio that staticmoth is a ship I like, you are warned of that the moment you come to my page, even if my main thing is one-sided radiostatic, and no, it doesn't mean I support or deny val's actions in ANY WAY, he's a horrible person. absolutely. I hope he gets what's coming to him in the show, I hope angel gets to be free and FAR away from him. but for now, I find staticmoth as a ship intriguing, because they're both horrible people but are capable of having a more balanced dynamic with one another compared to their victims, maybe it'll change in the future and I won't like it anymore, who knows?

[project-sekai-facts]

I could totally be wrong abt this, since I haven't actually read most wxs stories, but from the ones I did read, I noticed that Tsukasa sometimes... weaponizes his insecurities and struggles? I shouldn't use the word weaponize, more like he uses them as a tool to enhance his acting? The biggest example being Pheonix at the Sky's Edge CH 7 & 8, where he feels like he'll never reach the goal he set for himself and uses it as a way to improve his role as Ryo? Or Dazzling Stage, where he turns his loneliness as a chid into a way to relate to Torpe? I think he does it all the time actually, since he's super loud and dramatic but his internal dialogue is so much quieter. He takes any emotion he feels and bass boosts it, which actually makes a lot of sense since we've seen him when he's not acting like that and Nene was actually kind of put-off that he wasn't yelling and being theatrical (wonder magical showtime CH 8).

Yeah, you're right. Tsukasa is probably best described as a method actor. He struggles with characters that he cannot relate to (emotionally), and has to find a way to connect himself with them in order to play them, such as Torpe and Rio. With Torpe, he was only able to act the character as best he could once he came to terms with his lonliness as a child/younger teen and realised that he used the piano in the exact same way Torpe looked at the stars. Same with Rio, where he tried starving himself like the character does first, only for that to not work but then forced himself to face his inferiority and hopelessness, and was able to connect that to the character. He always finds a way to relate to the character emotionally in the end, but both times it’s required him to uncover/face something unpleasant (that being his loneliness and inferior talent). So yeah, he's good at fairly flat 'hero' or otherwise mostly positive characters, but when he gets given a more emotionally complex character, he has to use his personal struggles to get into the mindset of the character.

I think that Tsukasa is the kind of person who doesn’t like to dwell on the past too much, but also he doesn’t seem to like to think about things that aren’t, y'know, mostly positive. Like, the reason he wanted to become a star, as well as his loneliness when he was younger both stem from Saki being really ill, which is not the most pleasant thing to think of. He doesn’t think about the group splitting up in future as much as the other members do, he is aware of it but doesn’t face it. Mr. Showtime and some brief scenes in Lion Dance New Year are the best look at that we get. And he has to force himself to face that he has less talent than the people around him in Phoenix at the Sky's Edge and breaks down crying (this is not healthy jeez).

There's an area conversation from a while back where Rui asks Toya if Tsukasa has always had the confident and showy personality and Toya says that Tsukasa adopted that personality as a kid because he felt he needed to be more outwardly confident for Saki, and it just stuck. (note: EN translated the first sentence a bit weird. As far as I can understand, in the original text Toya says that Tsukasa did do the persona deliberately as a child, but here it makes it sound like he didn't). I think that alone explains the difference between how he acts outwardly vs inwardly.

He projects everything big and loud because it makes him appear confident, and he had to be brave for Saki so he could make her happy. Not all of the projecting is for confidence reasons, he's generally pretty emotional when the emotions are positive, and always projects them up to 11. I'm assuming that with the length of time Saki was in hospital for, he got so used to his persona that it just naturally became his normal personality. So maybe as that happened he started to amplify how he expressed everything, not just his courage. When we get to see his inner self, I think it's more toned down because he doesn't need to project when he's alone, and I'm guessing that this is how he acted before the persona, or at least somewhat close.

[pensat-i-fet]

The way he makes you smile (Rúben Dias x Reader, ft Mason Mount)

**Hi! I got this request a couple of weeks ago and there was some conversation about it. I was also made aware that this idea has been done before but I haven't read any of those stories so take this just as my spin on the premise. And enjoy reading! ❤️**

Word count: 2556

Masterlist

Wattpad

Everyone loved love stories like yours. The childhood friends that separated only to meet again and become a couple. And you loved it too…until you didn’t.

Mason was the love of your life. You’ve known him since you were a baby, really. And probably fell in love with him when you were only 5. But there were a lot of moments in your life where you had to separate because he moved to London, and then he went to The Netherlands for a year, …and it was tough to see him leave you behind but you understood. Everyone just expected you to get over your crush and move on at some point. But you didn’t. And one time when he came back home to visit his family, he finally confessed he felt the same way about you.

That had been 2 years ago. 24 months of happiness by your soulmate’s side…or so people thought. Because after the first year, the cracks in your relationship started to show.

“Are you even happy?”, asked you one of your friends when you confessed to her that you and Mason had been having problems.

“Of course. I couldn’t ask for anything better. I have a good job, family is healthy and I’m dating the best guy”.

“Tell that to your fake smile. Honey…I’m not looking forward to you two breaking up knowing how that would break your heart but you aren’t happy. You’re arguing all the time, even in front of people. You look so sad and I want you to go back to how you used to be. I know it’s hard to let go of your first love but sometimes it’s for the best”.

“I…”.

“I know. Just think about it. Think about the pros and cons. And try and take the best decision for you. Because that’s who matters, you. You always put everyone else before you and it needs to stop”.

And she was right, of course she was. So that was why after another big fight over the stupidest thing, you finally put yourself first.

“We can’t do this anymore, Mason”.

“What do you mean?”

“This. Us. It’s destroying us. We are always fighting and we barely see each other so…how is that living? I feel like if maybe we stop now, we could at least save our friendship. Maybe even try this out again in the future. When we’re in different places in our lives”.

His look was of pure shock, mixed with anger. He really wasn’t used to being told something like this.

“Do you not love me?”

“I love you too much, Mason. Too much to force you, and to force me, to stay in this toxic relationship. We’re hurting each other”.

“Is there someone else?”

He had to be kidding.

“No! There is no one else! See? We can’t even talk without you turning everything into a fight!”

“Because you’re giving up on me. On us”.

“Someone has to. Before we destroy each other”.

And with those final words, you left him there. It broke your heart, but you knew you were doing the right thing.

What you needed in that moment was a fresh start and your job provided you with one. Most people couldn’t believe that you were willing to move from London to Manchester. To a smaller office and a smaller position in the company. But you just couldn’t stay in London anymore. Manchester wasn’t that far away but…it was better. The distance helped.

And the city also had something else waiting for you to help mend your broken heart. Well, not a something but a someone.

“Sorry”, you heard someone say in the middle of Sainsbury’s. “I know this sounds weird but I’ve seen you here shopping a few times and it’s driving me insane not knowing where I know you from”.

You looked up at the man talking to you and he looked familiar too. And when you looked at him properly, you knew exactly why he thought he knew you.

                                       –

                        6 months earlier

“Who’s that looking at us? He looks familiar”.

Mason turned to see who you meant and rolled his eyes. “Rúben Dias. He plays for City and I met him once at an F1 GP”.

“Right”.

You remembered that GP. Because you were supposed to attend with him but a big fight a few days prior made you stay home. Another plan ruined by your fights.

The man, Rúben, approached you to say hello to your boyfriend.

“Hi Mason, how are you?”

“Good, thanks. We need to go. See you later”.

“Ok?”

Rúben’s confusion at Mason’s behaviour mirrored yours.

“Why were you so rude to him?”

“How could I not be? He’s been staring at you the whole time”.

“Mason”, you said with a sigh. “He doesn’t know me. If anything, he would have been staring at you”.

“I’m not the one wearing that dress”.

“I thought you liked this dress. You bought it for me”.

“I like it. I don’t like guys drooling around you when you wear it”.

You were tired. Too tired. And not ready for another argument in front of so many people. So you just let the comment slide…there would be time to fight about it once you two were back home.

                                       –

“You’re Rúben, right?”

“So you know me too?”, he laughed. “Now I’m even more confused. But also intrigued. Please put me out of my misery”.

You laughed as well. “We saw each other at an event months ago. I was there with Mason Mount”.

“Oh”, you could tell the moment when it all clicked. “I remember now”.

“We aren’t together anymore”.

“Good”.

His words surprised you. Why would he say that?

“I mean. I only know the guy from playing against him and partying together once but when I saw him with you…no one deserves to be treated like that”.

“I know. That’s why I left”.

The way he smiled at you reminded you of how your friend had when you told her about leaving Mason. They both looked proud of you.

After that chat in the supermarket, you promised to meet again. It would be good for you to have a friend in Manchester that wasn’t just someone from your office.

Rúben ended up being someone you could talk to, someone who could help you, someone who understood you like no one had before. So falling for him was just something inevitable.

And everything was perfect but still…you worried. Rúben had to play against Mason. And, even if he respected your wish to be private, one day you’d have to tell the world you were together. And the reaction from Mason worried you. But also, what about his family? His fans? Even random people just judging you for dating two football players…facing everyone’s opinions terrified you.

“You need to stop”, mumbled Rúben.

“What do I need to stop? I thought you were sleeping”.

“I was, but the light from your screen woke me up. You’re addicted, my love. Wait until you leave the bed to check social media”.

You laughed at his complaint. He was right and you knew it but it was hard to change some habits.

It was when you were about to block your phone to enjoy your boyfriend’s kisses that you saw it.

Mason Mount agrees personal terms with Manchester United.

The phone fell from your hands and that caught Rúben’s attention. “So clumsy. See? Another reason to not be on your phone in bed”, he laughed. “We don’t want it to fall on your pretty face”.

“Mason is going to sign for United”.

“Huh?”

You showed the article to him.

“It’s ok”, he tried to reassure you.

“It just complicates things more…”.

“It doesn’t if we don’t allow it to. Your ex is moving to this city, big deal. It’s big enough for the three of us, I swear”.

“But he’ll play for United…”.

“It’s not as if he’s signing for City. That would be a bit trickier, not gonna lie. But I’ve played against him this season and it was fine”.

“Ok, I’ll believe you. But I have a bad feeling about this”.

The feeling never left you but…nothing happened. Mason moved to Manchester and didn’t even try to contact you. He was living his own life while you lived yours.

That was…until things changed.

On a Wednesday off with no matches, you and Rúben made your way to Bruno Fernandes’ house. The Portuguese players sometimes hosted a little get-together to catch up, even if they played for rival teams. You were literally the only non-Portuguese there but they still made you feel like one of them.

But people didn’t get they could be friends and rivals at the same time, so you kept those meetings private. Private like Bruno’s private Instagram account where he posted a story where you were seating next to Rúben. His arm was around your shoulder to bring you closer to him and the smiles on your faces couldn’t be bigger.

Bruno didn’t have many followers on that private account because that way he could make sure no one leaked anything private to the press. But he let his teammates follow him. And that meant that Mason was now following his account. So on that Wednesday night, when he was scrolling on Instagram totally bored, he saw the story. He saw you and Rúben together. And no one could see that photo and not know you two were a couple.

However, he didn’t call you to ask for an explanation. He didn’t tell Bruno about it either, to try and get information from his teammate. He waited until he had to meet Rúben at the Manchester derby to do something.

“Are you the reason she broke up with me?”, he said when the players were about to go out to warm up.

“I don’t know how you’ve found out but leave her alone”.

“Answer my question”.

“I didn’t know her then so no, I wasn’t the reason why she left you. It was all your doing”.

“What do you know about our private life?”

“Enough to want to smash your face against a wall but I won’t do it because it’s not worth it. And now she is with someone who treats her the way she deserves to be treated. That’s all that matters to me”.

Mason didn’t like that answer. At all. And so he spent the whole match trying to provoke Rúben to get a reaction from him but found none. The only thing he found was his way to the bench in the second half, after being told off by his coach for not focusing on the match.

“Shaw needs to do the post-match interviews”, said one of the media people.

“He’s injured and receiving treatment. Send someone else”.

“I’ll do it”, said Mason and no one thought much of it.

The Sky Sports reporter asked him all the same boring questions he was so used to answering. But she also asked the one he was waiting for.

“We also saw you seemed to have some issues with Rúben Dias. It almost seemed personal”, she laughed.

“It was. He stole my girl after all”.

The reporter’s jaw almost hit the floor but Mason didn’t allow her to recover and ask more questions before leaving.

When you saw the clip on social media, you felt like you were going to faint. Rúben saw it too and tried to get back home as fast as possible. For once, you weren’t in the stadium with him. Now he was happy you were nowhere near your ex.

“I can’t believe he did that”, was all you said when he got home.

And he knew words meant nothing at that point, so he just hugged you while you cried. Waiting for you to let all the tears out.

“What do you want to do?”, he finally said.

“What do you mean?”

“Do you want us to respond? I could get my team to write everything before we publish it to make sure it’s well written. Or we could not say anything. He doesn’t get to change how we handle our relationship”.

“You should probably deny what he said. Your reputation…”.

“You think I care about my reputation right now?”, asked Rúben. And you had never seen him looking so serious. “I promised he would never make you cry again and look at you right now”.

“You can’t protect me from everything, Rúben”.

“Why?”

That finally made you laugh. “Because that’s how life is. And it’s not your fault. It’s only his”.

After debating what was the best strategy to follow, you decided to make your relationship public. Well, it already was thanks to Mason. But you were now able to tell your side of the story.

It was a long post where you mentioned breaking up with Mason before moving to Manchester, where you met Rúben. You made it clear there had been no cheating involved, which was very important for you. Cheaters made you sick so being compared to one was the worst feeling. And you just basically made it clear that you and Rúben still planned to keep a low profile and asked for people not to invade your privacy.

Even after that post, you expected to get a lot of abuse on social media. But what you didn’t expect was to get a message from Mason.

[Mason]: I’m sorry about what I did. Can we please talk? No tricks. I just need to talk to you.

“Rúben? You need to see this”.

You showed him the text and he frowned while reading it. “Do you want me to go with you if you meet him?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea”.

“But you going alone…”.

“I think I need to do this. I don’t know how to explain it but I just do”.

“I trust your instinct. Do whatever feels right to you”.

So over a year after leaving Mason, you were in front of him again. There was your friend, your first love, the person you thought you were going to spend your life with…and now he felt like a stranger.

“I’m sorry”, he said and you nodded. “I went crazy when I saw you with someone else. And the fact that it was another player…it’s irrational but it hurt more for some reason”.

“I guess I can understand that. But it’s not like I did it on purpose. My life would be a lot easier dating an average Joe, you know?”

“Easier maybe, but not better, right? I saw how happy you looked with him. You never looked that happy with me”.

“I was happy…”, you tried to defend yourself but he lifted a hand to stop you.

“But not that happy. And I’m glad you are. I’m glad you found someone who can make you smile like that”.

“Then why did you try and shame me in front of millions of people?”

“Because I felt shame myself. Shame about how it all ended for us. Shame that it wasn’t me who made you happy. But I’ve made my peace. Next time I talk to the media I’ll tell them I lied. You deserve to keep smiling the way he makes you smile instead of all the tears I caused”.

[flippinpancakes64]

Hey, idk if you've written this yet but how do you think the Cullen's would feel about turning their SO into a vampire?

The Cullens turning their S/O

I haven't done this yet so don't worry. I did something similar for my first post but that was the Cullens with a Newborn

Thank you for requesting and I hope you enjoy!

Edward:

Absolutely fucking not

You saw how much convincing it took for him to turn Bella

And that was after she almost died like 20 times

So if you're perfectly healthy, not in any immediate danger, and doing well in your life then he is not touching a single hair on your head

He won't do it

Of course, we have also seen that he can be convinced

I think with enough pushing and maybe one or two near death experiences you could negotiate something

Now if you're about to die?

He doesn't even hesitate

Well actually he does

But only for a little bit

You're dying, he needs to help you

He is so apologetic though

He feels like a monster for weeks

Or maybe even years

For as long as you're going through the newborn process he is tearing himself up on the inside

He legitimately wants to die he feels so bad

But he does get over himself lol

He has pretty good self control overall so as far as the actual process of turning you it would be pretty smooth

In general, though, he wouldn't want to do it

He's scared of killing you, of losing control, of you hating him, of everything that could go wrong

He's gonna need a while to be okay after you get turned

But he'll come around :)

Alice:

She doesn't remember her human life

As a result she doesn't feel too connected to humanity

So there's a pretty good chance that she would turn you if you asked her

Of course not before some arguing

While she doesn't feel connected to humanity, that doesn't mean that she wants to strip you of yours

But she is just a twinge selfish

It wouldn't take too much convincing for her to change you

She loves you and wants to spend eternity with you

She explains her challenges and gets Carlisle to weigh in with the pros and cons

But she would turn you

And if it was a life-or-death scenario?

Absolutely no hesitation

Maybe she saw that it was about to happen and couldn't stop it or for some reason she didn't see it

All she knows is that you are on the ground dying and she NEEDS to save you

She feels bad afterwards when she sees all of the pain that you're in

But she can also see that you'll be fine in a couple months

She just encourages you to be strong and wait it out

Is there for you every step of the way though

Jasper:

There's actually zero chance

He hates newborns

And he doesn't trust them

And he knows the pain

He remembers seeing other newborns writhing in pain, he remembers his own transformation, and he would never inflict that upon you

He cannot be convinced

Similarly to Edward, if you are happy, healthy, and content, he will not turn you

But there's no negotiation

Like end of story

He won't do it

Now if you're in danger and about to die, he'll do it

Actually he won't

He'll get Carlisle or Edward or literally anyone else to do it

He doesn't trust himself

He is convinced that he will kill you if he tries

And in his defense he probably would

But he is beside you every step of the way afterwards

He's very wary of you, though

Does his best to keep you calm and make sure you don't hurt anyone

Also feels very guilty

Even if he's not the one who made you

He feels like it's his fault

Rosalie:

Again, she wouldn't change you

We all know how she feels about humans being turned

She's probably the one who would be the least likely to do it

So again, if you're healthy and not on the verge of death, she will not change you

And it's sort of the same story when you're about to die

In a lot of ways, she wishes she had died instead of being turned

Now instead of being able to move on, she has to live with her regrets and with the fact that she will never be human

But she's a little too selfish for that

If somehow she managed to fall in love with you even though you were a human, that means she must REALLY love you

She spends so much time deliberating with herself that she has to turn you herself

Breaking her "never tasted human blood" streak

She gets a bit upset at that but she gets over it

She keeps debating with herself even after you've been turned

She's convinced that you must hate her now and that surely you want to be dead right now

And she feels terrible for having been the one to do it

But it's okay you have eternity to convince her that she made the right choice

Emmett:

He's another one who would just do it

The whole reason he was turned in the first place was because Rosalie fell in love with him

And so he figures that you being in love with him and him being in love with you is a good enough reason

You don't really have to beg him

He will insist that you know all of the risks first

He'll ask Carlisle for some tips on how to change you safely

And boom all done

But if you were about to die?

Same thing I guess

Literally no hesitation

Well actually let me back up

If someone or something attacked you he is killing their ass first

Doesn't matter who or what it was

Now if it was an accident or something he just goes to you straight up

No detours

I feel like he would struggle a bit with turning you

Right after he was turned the Cullens had to move multiple times in the span of a couple years because he kept getting out of control

So if he didn't have the time to properly prepare I feel like it might not end well

Hopefully for your sake Carlisle's there...

Esme:

She's another one whose life has only been improved by being turned

She was always captivated by vampires

And she didn't really have a happy life leading up to her death

So for her, one of the best things that's ever happened to her was being turned

Now, that does not translate directly to her turning you, no questions asked

Even though she loves her new life, she knows Rosalie's and Jasper's stories

And she wants you to think about it

You would have to ask her pretty consistently for at least a couple of years before she would say yes

She needs to know that you are absolutely sure

And that you know what you're agreeing to

So after a while you could get her to agree to it

Now in a life or death of course she would turn you

That is the exact scenario that Carlisle found her in

And she sees it as okay to turn someone then

She honestly might ask Carlisle to do it

When you're already in such a fragile state she doesn't want to jeopardize you even more

She doesn't really feel bad either way after you've been turned

As in like with herself

Obviously she feels bad seeing you in pain

But she doesn't feel like a monster or anything

You asked for this

Carlisle:

The man, the myth, the legend

He is responsible for turning at least four vampires

So he totally could

But if you're perfectly healthy then he's not going to

His moral compass is too high

I mean, his pattern is only turning people that are about to die

So good luck trying to convince this guy

Now if you ARE about to die...

Well then you have the perfect guy

Does not hesitate at all

He knows what to do, how to do it, and the best way to go about it

And who knows maybe he might get the morphine right this time (sorry Bella)

Very attentive after you've been turned

He knows everything that you need and is very patient

Another one who doesn't really carry the mental burden of turning you

You were about to die, he saved you

He does of course feel bad if you struggle more than normal with being turned

Or if you express hatred with some new aspects of yourself

But he does his best to be there for you and reassure you

Vampire! Bella:

So

She's got a bit of a complex

Before she got turned, she heard all of these horror stories about newborns

And then she got turned

And she didn't feel any of it

Logically, she knows it's because of her shield

But it doesn't stop her from thinking that surely it can't be that bad

That coupled with the fact that she LOVES her new vampire life

And that she hated being human

She doesn't hesitate

If you were to literally even mention it in passing that you wanted to be turned you are bitten that very night

#1 Enabler

And it's the same scenario if you were about to die

She loves you

Of course she's not gonna let you die

She does feel really bad though once she sees you struggling

Like if you're not adapting well or if you show obvious longing for your old life

She feels really bad

And she tells you that

Just give her a couple kisses and tell her that you love her

[these-emo-thoughts]

Last Twilight Episode 11 thoughts

A lot of people are hating on Day right now but I get him. I do. And if you haven't watched episode 11 yet, maybe skip this post as it revolves around a major part of the plot. If you've watched the ep, you probably know what I'm talking about. More detail is under the cut.

Warning, this is a long one, lol. Apologies for any mistakes, I'm a bit sick and didn't read over it 🤣

If you've seen it already, I'm going to explain why I think Mhok and Day's break-up had to happen and why it is the best thing for them right now.

Mhok's fear of losing another person because he isn't there to help or pick up the phone is absolutely valid (and so real and relatable that I feel personally attacked). He doesn't stay with Day out of pity, which has been established multiple times throughout the series - but the trauma of what he went through with Rung and the fear of possibly repeating that again with Day has made his anxiety cloud his judgement and his heart. It's not a healthy way to live - constantly worrying about your partner, to the extent where you cannot live for yourself, is not sustainable for a relationship (I also find this quite ironic because up until this point Mhok has been on his own for a long time now). We saw the manifestation of this fear in episode 11 multiple times too, with Mhok leaving in the middle of the shift to check that the guest that was hit by a car wasn't Day, and then when he was freaking out when Day wasn't answering his phone. Imagine going through all of that, but this time, your partner is 15 hours away by plane.

Day choosing to break up with him is, in my opinion, more complex than just "he lied to me and pitied me". That's part of it (and will come back at the end of this post), yes, and he does have the right to be upset that Mhok lied to him. Again, it's not healthy for the both of them if they are going to continue a relationship. I also want to point out that Day is at a disadvantage here because while he is capable of living his life independently as a blind man, he can't actually see the emotions on people's faces when he talks to them and that's can be important for picking up what others are putting down. Day can't see the changes in Mhok's expression when his smile fades, he has to rely on the other to talk to him when something is up, so lying is a BIG no-no here (as it would be for any relationship). So far, they've done a great job at communicating, so this is presented as new issue - but, it's a big one. So yes, the lying is part of it, but it's not ALL of it.

"But what IS all of it!?" I hear you scream into the Tumblr void. Well, by now, OF COURSE Day knows that Mhok truly loves him and KNOWS that the other doesn't pity him - he's said so many times. So, Day must realise at this point - of which the timeline is probably at a year of them knowing each other, give or take - that Mhok is deliberately holding himself back from good opportunities because of that love. It must hurt like hell, knowing that you're the reason your partner is self-sabotaging, but there's nothing you can do to change their mind because everything is out of your control. It's so much easier for Day to say "Mhok pities me and lied to me and that's why I want to break up" instead of "I'm the reason Mhok won't go".

It's heartbreaking, but what's the solution here? Long distance? Sure, maybe - but that's not going to stop Mhok from worrying about Day and being distracted from his job. It's not going to stop Day from feeling like he's a burden to Mhok. Not only that, with timezones and such a huge distance, there are even more complications to worry about. Plus, let's say something DID happen to Day while Mhok was in Hawaii - it goes back to exactly the problem that Mhok had which is what can he do about it? Long distance is a solution, but how long will they last living like that?

"Okay emo, so why doesn't Day just go to Hawaii with Mhok? Then they can be together and Mhok can fulfil his promise to take him there and they don't have to break up and they'll live happily ever after." I see you!! But... that's a BIG decision. Mhok and Day's trip to Songkhla may have been a test to see how they weather the storm of living together as boyfriends, but it was only for a few days. And Day - for most of it - was alone in the room while Mhok was working. That's not a way for Day to live, and it still won't stop Mhok from being worried, probably even MORESO now because they're in a whole other country.

So... what's left?

Day's decision to break up with Mhok is heartbreaking, but is probably the only solution that makes sense to me. Mhok CANNOT live a life like this. He can't. It's already debilitating him and it'll get even worse if he's constantly prioritising Day over himself in every aspect of life. Of course a person should think about their partner, but not to the point where it becomes unhealthy self-sabotage. Day also cannot live happily like this. He's come to terms living with a disability and already is aware of how different his daily life is to that of a sighted person - but the little voice in the back of his mind, the one reminding him that he's the reason Mhok is not living his life to the fullest, is making the entire process more difficult for him (and the lying really doesn't help).

So... yeah. A necessary evil that unfortunately to many will be written off simply as the "episode 11 curse". An evil that has people already saying that Day is stupid and immature, when I really believe this is the most rational he's been. I know even the actors have said it's about the lying but this is P'Aof we're talking about here - he's a brilliant story-teller, and there's always more to his art than what we see on the surface. It's happened in other shows he's directed, which is why they rate so highly. Last Twilight is no exception, and the complexity of the love story between Mhok and Day is nothing short of a masterpiece. That's how I see it, anyway.

Would love to hear other thoughts and perspectives!

[wazzappp]

Considering that Khaji Da chose Jaime A, quickly, B, instead of his murder-happy family, I don’t think that it’s a matter of personal preference who Khaji Da picks. Khaji Da didn’t eavesdrop for days to decide if it liked him, it activated pretty much the second it made physical contact with him. So what if it’s genetic? Like with blood types, or organ transplants. What if the scarab can mimic the markers on the outside of cells that tell the immune system that they’re not foreign and shouldn’t be destroyed, but only some of them, or some not as well as others? On contact with Jaime, then, it knew that he had genetic markers it could mimic to avoid having to suppress the immune system. (It could, of course, and use its own robotic antibodies to keep him healthy, but that takes power, so better to not have to do that.)

Also, considering that, the scarab would have to have very very good chemical sensors. If I was a Reach scientist, I’d put them in two lines down the body of the scarab on the top (to read the dna of the host-to-be if the scarab is being grabbed), and on the tips of all limbs + the mandibles (to read the dna if the scarab is doing the grabbing).

Sorry for the spam, lol. I’m a bit obsessed.

Ohhhhhhh FANTASTIC reasoning dude!!

Yeah yeah that would TOTALLY make sense. If Jaimes immune system recognized Khaji as a threat while they were trying to assimilate, he would manifest symptoms (chills, fever, sniffles, cough etc) and that would be. Far less. Than optimal in a situation where he is literally being hunted lmao.

That's interesting because it would also imply that Khaji has their own DNA containing genetic markers that would generally need to be adapted to suit a host. What percentage of Khajis DNA would need to change in order to not trigger an immune response, I wonder?

Also this is interesting because it would mean that there are genetic mutations happening that (at least initially) Khaji would have absolutely NO CONTROL over. A certain percent of Khajis DNA would need to stay the same for it to still be, you know, Khaji. So as much as Khaji Da's DNA is changing, jaimes DNA would ALSO still need to change in order for them to be compatible (referring to assimilated cells).

Hmmmmm. Maybe when they finally 'Sync Up' in the finale of the movie, that's Jaime's brain cells finally relenting to assimilation with Khajis DNA. I'm fairly sure that up until that point we've only seen Khaji speak with Jaime while their helmet on. That could imply that Khaji is just pumping their voice through speakers in the helmet rather than directly through Jaimes auditory nerves. They haven't gotten that far yet.

Oh fuck. But that would mean that all the way throughout the movie Khai is almost just. MANUALLY YOINK-ING Jaimes limbs around cause they haven't fully integrated into his central nervous system. I mean, maybe they could just artificially send electrical stimuli into whatever nerve affects the area they want to move but JEEZ.

Oh god that could also allow for jaimes brain to send its own instructions to stop that limb from moving. His body could like. LITERALLY tear itself apart. Jesus christ.

[sunny-mercya]

His Reasons

Rusty Ryan x Male Reader

Fandom -> Ocean's Trilogy

Masterlist

When Danny, after being out of prison, asked Rusty to join him at a Grand Coup—Rusty had only agreed halfway to it. After all he wanted to know what exactly they would rob and risking their lives and freedom for.

And when Danny told him, they gonna rob three Casinos in good old Viva Las Vegas, Rusty wanted to know a good enough reason for him to join in such madness of nonsense.

And Danny, like the best friend and charming asshole he is, told Rusty the only valid reason;

»If we pull this off and I promise you, we will, you can finally move with [Name] to wherever your heart desires and afford the safety you have promised him.«

Danny was right, hitting a wound point in Rusty's ego, because there had been one thing Rusty couldn't give you and that was protection. Protection you from a past, you wouldn't be able to free yourself if you don't have a certain amount of money to pay for.

»Okay. I'm in, but if we fail I'm gonna send you personally to hell, Danny boy.«

Rusty might have agreed, trusting and believing in his friend that they will manage this with a 100 percentage chance of successful winning—but he also know what price it would cost him, because if they indeed fail it would be you who Rusty would lose and you're more worth to him than all the money and jewels in the world.

~~~

So far, the whole plan went, besides absolutely minor improvements of differences, hellbent well.

Rusty could almost imagine the millions, billions, of money he would have. Enough money to buy you free and finally move to either (f.country) or sweet California.

Just you and him, Rusty thought, imagining the new life—fully secure, comfortable and happy healthy—he would have with you and maybe a big family with lots of dogs and cats (and perhaps Danny, because he's your self-proclaimed older brother)

„Uh, uhm, Rusty there's–“ „Rusty, there's a problem. A You problem.“

»What?« asked Rusty, scrunching up his face in confusion. Another problem? What sort of you-problem do they mean?

„Look towards the entrance.“

»Fuck. Give me some minutes to handle this guys.«

»Robert Russel James Ryan! You do not write me a letter with such unbelievable heinous words and leave our house in such fucking manners. How fucking dare you! Do you know how fucking worried I was?!«

A few people had turned their heads, when you had marched forward to Rusty and shouted in anger at him.

Ouch, shouting his full name—yeah, you're furious and it was Rusty's own damn faulty mistake. Indeed a You-Problem.

Rusty took a few steps forward to you, having his hands up in surrender, wanting to appease you. Honestly, he haven't seen you this angry ever since Danny and him had a bloody fist fight with your "Boss", which they lost—of course, as they couldn't win against a knife and knuckleheads—and you were so furious with them, that they were taken back with the amount of cursing you said at them, while treating their wounds.

»Hey, love, watcha you doing here?«

»Don't come with such bullshit. You know perfectly well, why the fuck I'm here. So tell me now, Russel, the fuck are you and Danny—and I know that fucker is here as well—suspiciously planning to do here?!«

Rusty inhaled and exhaled deeply through his nose, trying to think of a way to get you away from here—before you causing more disturbance and a possible fail to the plan. Then again, he could use you for a good distraction, but no—no, no, he had sworn himself to not do such things with you.

Gripping your arms gently, Rusty pulls you close to his side and leads you away to a more secluded area of waiting.

~~~

Waking up to an empty bedside next to you and discovering your husband is not in your shared apartment, even though he told he would be on time back—and that has been days ago, I mind you—brought a lot of unpleasant thoughts through your mind.

There could be many things happening to Rusty; him having a accident, in a hospital and injured, arrested—your husband is certainly not a innocent man, he had done some bad and dangerous awful things of illegally, you're aware of it—or worst case scenario, your Boss quit the deal and killed Rusty.

You started to walk through your tiny apartment, still clothes in pyjamas—shorts and one of Rusty's oversized shirts—mind going haywire with everything and anything; be it the due bills, another round of grocery shopping—as Rusty is a total glutton and eats more than you and probably has an endless pit of a stomach—which you don't know how to pay for, the payment deal, Rusty being gone and probably killed and you still being jobless.

A lot of things for a tiny mind like yours to think about.

Then, while you cleaned, you found a note—definitely from Rusty and when you read it, you screamed in disbelief.

Yeah, sure, do a few days trip to Las Vegas and just don't tell me personally, not even the reasons for it—you thought, scoffing at your Husband, who's a buffoon

~~~

»Rusty, you tell me now why you and Danny are here.«

»I can't love, it's a surprise«

Perhaps, in perspective, Rusty should have told you personally about his little trip and possibly heist, but then it wouldn't be a surprise and loved to surprise you.

»Fuck your surprise. I thought he called off the deal, I thought he had killed you. I was worried sick.«

»I know, I know, dear. I apologise, I shouldn't have told you via note, could this prince forgive a humble man like me?«

Rusty leaned in closer, whispering the last few words in your ear as he ask for your forgiveness and kissing your cheek, when you remained silent.

„Not to bother, but time management?“

Rusty rolled his eyes, the guys could be such mood killers and a pain of annoyance in the ass. The gang was his gang though and he had a job to fulfil.

»Need to go, love. Meet me at Helios-Motel in like two hours.« Rusty kissed your lips, a gentle kiss it was and gave you the Motel-Keys.

Before Rusty could stand up and go, you had taken ahold of his hand.

»You promised me, you and Danny will be safe and unharmed?«

»Always, my love«

And when Rusty flashed you his signature grin, you let him go—knowing he wouldn't break his promise.