#me fighting strider: perfect blocking on instinct without even thinking

[verygayandverytired]

i fucking hate playing as viola but the strider fights with her have been really awesome

[grassbreads]

my disorganized thoughts on epilogue Dirk

So, I've seen a lot of posts (mostly on tumblr) complaining about the epilogue, and about Dirk and Jane's characterization in particular.  Right now, I want to talk about Dirk.  

TLDR: I think he's a lot more in character than people are saying.

As far as I'm concerned, the epilogue was completely in character for him.  This is because the dirk we deal with in the meat route is not the dirk we have come to know and love and watch develop over the course of the final acts of the comic.  The dirk in the meat route is one that has fully realize (or at least, is most of the way through the process of fully realizing) his Ultimate Self.  

In other words, the dirk in the epilogue is the result of melding together of Every Possible Dirk.  This includes developed, healing Dirks like the one we see in canon up until we reach the meat route, but this also includes all the dirks that don't heal, all the dirks that turn out like Bro.  It's just like what Rose says she fears just before succumbing to Dirk's pressure to "open her eyes."  She's scared that what remains once her ultimate self is fully realized we'll no longer be her in the sense that it will no longer be the specific version of her that she's become over the course of her unique timeline, and based on Dirk, her fears seem to be coming to fruition.  Based on how he explains things to Rose, Dirk in his current state has an awareness of every version of himself from every possible timeline, and he’s lost himself, the specific iteration of himself that experienced the canon ending, the Dirk that we know.  Try as he might, it seems that even the great puppetmaster himself doesn’t have the ability to distinguish a single self in the maelstrom of the collective.

And honestly, I think that canon ultimate dirk is exactly what this type of dirk fusion is bound to create.  Dirk Strider has the potential to be a genuinely great person, but he also has the potential to be terrible.  We see it most clearly in canon with Bro and the way that he raised Dave.  As Bro, dirk let his worst qualities take over.  He was scheming, violent, manipulative, and borderline sociopathic.  Bro always believed firmly that he was in the right with everything he did.  He wasn't malevolent, he was just severely misled.  He thought that his cruel methods would be the most effective way to ready Dave for sburb, and so he hurt him in order to help him.  This same "hurting loved ones for the sake of their betterment" thread runs along every version of Dirk.  He does it to Dave as Bro, he does it to Jake, and now he's doing it for the whole of the rest of the cast.

Dirk has always had the potential to be terrible, and resisting that potential was a huge part of our Dirk’s character arc.  It took immense self control, as well as a lot of self-analysis and misery.  Our Dirk was on his way to becoming someone really, truly good.  However, giving into his darker, plotting urges would have been the far easier choice.  And, all things considered, I believe that a majority of alternate Dirks would have given in.  Water flows along the path of least resistance, and Dirks follow the same way.  This giving in is by no means the right choice for his character or for the story, hence why the “canon” dirk was on his way to redemption, but still, out there in paradox space there must be countless Dirks from countless other timelines that have fallen to the temptation to scheme.  

And keeping this in mind, I think we also have to acknowledge that although our canon Dirk was certainly on the right path, he was by no means perfect.  He had all the same starting nature as the version of him that grew up to be Bro, and the situation he grew up in was not exactly great for fostering his empathy skills.  He still had all the building blocks to grow up to be something truly formidable, all he needed was something to break his restraint, and that something was the realization of his Ultimate Self.  Imagine Dirk, struggling to keep oriented as to which of the many Dirks in his mind is the him he’s meant to be, seeing the realities in which he gives in and succeeds.  Imagine him seeing that sometimes his genius plots do pay off; sometimes, in some universes, Jake English resigns himself to Dirk’s plots and becomes a hero more powerful than any can imagine; sometimes Bro’s training turns out to be the only thing that Dave has to rely on in times of strife; sometimes his plots to make himself into an elaborate villain really do foster great positive change in his companions.  Imagine Dirk, already weakened mentally by the quiet encroachment of other versions of himself, deciding that maybe his schemes really are the best way to help his friends after all.  Dirk is mentally ill in a way, struggling with empathy and self control, and though he is becoming a better person, recovery from mental illness or addictions rarely happens without relapse.  The problem is that Dirk’s relapse is a thing of monumental, world ending importance.  

And, though I know some feel otherwise, the playcasting of himself in the villain role also seems to me to be in character.  The epilogue goes out of its was to show this tendency of Dirk’s to want to be his friends’ motivational foil in the explanation of his bouts with Jake, and this isn’t the first time this theme has been explored with him.  Bro never shied away from making Dave hate him in the process of making him “ready,” and Dirk built Jake a literal robotic version of himself for Jake to fight for his own betterment.  This “foil” tactic is familiar territory for him, though this is the first time he’s acknowledged it by name.  Thanks to his unique blend of self loathing and hubris, Dirk has both an absolute confidence in his own mental abilities and an instinctive willingness to accept others’ dislike of him.  

Finally, I believe that Dirk’s classpect may have something to do with his fate.  After all, he is the prince of heart, the destroyer of the soul/self/love.  His powers have manifested in a literal way (the soul ripping), but now the less tangible parts of his classpect are rearing their head.  He’s always had so many splinters, so what better way than to truly fulfill his role than to destroy his very self by letting himself be overwhelmed by his alternate versions?

Dirk Strider has immense potential for good, and canon Dirk did a lot to realize that potential.  However, he was also still a deeply imperfect person deep down, and that caught up with him.  I’m not saying that I like the way he’s been developed or that the way that the Dirk we know and love has been so suddenly ripped away from us is good (I really don’t know what to think), but the fact remains, meat Dirk really was in character.