#mentally exhausted

[borderlinebelle]

🪄🧠

a brain busted lunacy letter to:

YOU AND UR VERY OWN HUMAN EYES- READING THIS RIGHT NOW

+ tumblr,

I need each and every one of you to pls hear me out: i want you to feel it too. Remember long form content? Alright, gather your tits. Let’s get into it. 😈 if you remember how to read … come down there and see it for yourself.

hey you little bag of flesh meat, cartridge, water and electricity… come closer i said… 🙂

I deeply find the tumblr space, as a whole, so vitally valuable to our current society. I, like all of you, have painstakingly enjoyed sifting, repurposing, creating, and displaying a woven unique tapestry… mine is currently over 10 years long. A historical virtual “scroll” 📜… Manila ironic in the worst way: the scroll 🤳🏾 that consumes us.

This isn’t MINDLESSLY scrolling… it feels like… peaking penetratingly into the minds of human beings through their own perceptions.

Every fucking photo, gif, text post, meme, story, song, collage, any and all of it … was put there purposely. Everything … means something to someone here. That’s … fucking incredible.

That’s … fucking human magic. 🪄 something no other social media platform can recreate in the world of TikTok’s, we remained tumblr.

Every single mf time I find a new blog or revisit a mutual’s blog… and I just burst with color and vibrance and wild wickedness and I … drift… loosing myself in the back of your brains, I’m saved.

I’m saved from my own brain, trauma, habits, hangups, mental health… I’m just safe.. tucked behind YOUR brain… and they always fucking feel JUST like mine… so thank you.

I love human beings so much and this is my MOST favorite way to experience them. I’m so fucking happy I haven’t been able to log back into my TIKTOK for months. This is the only place I want to be when I’m online.

The tumblr scroll is so much more healthy: i see these feeds as very distinct and endlessly versatile flip book of human ingenuity and stupidity and comradery and community stitched together to make a pattern that mirrors a portion of a person… can you imagine? IT’S FASCINATING! I mean I know It’s equally ugly here and often… yet outstandingly but overwhelmingly … this is a safe space for creators and the many fandoms we express and decompress with.

i remain almost speechless,on the brink of pure pleasure… on how absolutely embedded i am into all of your collective energy on this stupid little imperfectly perfect fucked up little platform.

Look at April Fool’s Day: Tumblr reminded us all.. to just exhale and have fun TOGETHER. Ugh. gut me gently with the sheer scale of talent and genius and curiosity and kindness and skill and silly and authentic and absurd and individual yet succinct creation of … art. Of feed art. 🖼️ the scale and silly of the creativity around that now HOLIDAY, was tremendous and stupid and clever and community and inclusive.

i hope to one day gain support in organizing and leading a team of experts to create a true con for us. i have experience in events and .. I care. 🧠🪄

tumblr… this … is one of my longest lasting relationships, and i cherish the time so very dearly. From screaming at porn bots to whispering to mutuals… I’m so grateful for all of it.

[foxlungz]

I used to beg and plea for people to not leave me when I was younger and now that I’m older I don’t have the energy to care bc I’m used to it like I’ll hold the fucking door open for you lmao

[lifewaster-imdanger98]

Why am I always alone when I'm at my lowest?

[prettybones05]

I will be skinny

I will show bones

I will look ill

I will be pretty

[faerieicetea]

me going into hibernation when it's time to recharge my social battery

[morgansrecoveringig]

My problem is me. I can’t socialize for shit. All i do is self sabotage. There is something wrong with me that no one can fix.

[boldandburnt]

I worked so hard to destroy myself, why would I get better?

[vixensofdeath]

I destroy myself to make me feel better but in the end I always feel worse.

[themindofmine]

I feel like I’m already dead but I have to keep on living

[fucklife101]

I don’t know how many “just make it through today”s I’ve got left.

[shuaaflower]

I‘m a burden for everyone. I’m even a burden to myself.

[foxlungz]

Holding everything in because you know that no one wants to hear it or even cares

[family-disappointment]

I became so attached to my depression that I can't imagine my life without it anymore

[prettybones05]

It doesnt have to take time… just dont eat

[faerieicetea]

i wanna go back and hug my younger self so bad, that little girl went through so much

[lostmf]