#mithril suppository

[eliabrith]

Rings of Power aka Amazon LOTR

Had a week off and met up with the sibling who queue Rings of Power up on Amazon. 

Have to say I didn’t hate it but my god is it a mess in storytelling when it comes to the canon it is supposed to be following.

Cut to hide the spoilers....

Here be spoilers and, wildly inaccurate speculation....  

Timeline WTF?! 

The Elves seem to be somewhere between 700SA (Eragion built) and 1200SA (creating the rings) 

Numenoreans are more 3229 (to let Isildur be 20ish) to pre 3260 (Tar-Palantir is still alive) just before Numenor falls. 

No clue as to where the Harfoot timeline might be based on yet.

At one point I was hoping that it would all be a “Gotcha!” moment where the Elendil, who fishes Galadriel out of the sea, and has sons Anarion and Isildur was going to turn out to be a earlier member of the family and the names repeat later as a giant ‘joke’ especially as the sons are in the wrong order but not with all the other Numenorian characters also matching up with the ones at the Fall of Numenor. 

Missing Characters

Celeborn - Galadriel’s husband married since First Age. Confirmed missing in Ep7 as he apparently went to war (War of Wrath) at the ed of the FA and was ‘lost’. G has apparently spent x? years (see Timelines WTF?!) hunting down Sauron and orcs for killing her brother but not looking for her possibly alive husband.

Celebrian - Celeborn and Galadriel’s daughter should be born approx 300SA Elronds so could be aged anywhere between 200 and 2900 (also see Timelines WTF?!). Future wife to Elrond

If going for amping up the grief saying her husband and daughter were lost is extra angsty, without that it implies 'I lost my brother and husband and fecked off on a vengeance quest while abandoning my daughter' or she doesn't exist yet if they don’t have her born soon she’s going to end up a child bride to Elrond around the time Elladan and Elrohir are born.

Shitposting theories

Because I’m tired and as the series doesn’t make sense neither do my thoeries have to.

1 So timeline is F*cked and I can’t make sense of it maybe Galadriel fell through a time warp out at sea somewhere jumped forward 2500yrs and the Elf and Numenor stores are not happening in the same time (will be Jossed on Friday) and in 3255ish there are 2 versions of her running around ME.

TBH as Numenorian’s re-establish contact in 600SA they could have had her encouraging that to get back home and left the Miriel/Elendil/Isildur to later seasons where it might make a bit of sense

2 Mithril to cure the Elves. 

Sibling: what are they going to make pills out go it. 

Me: (eyeing the shape of it) looks more like a suppository to me...

Celebrimbor in the pics released for EP8 certainly looks like he might have a nasty surprise inserted somewhere he didn’t want it.

3 Celeborn and Celebrian are somewhere waiting for Galadriel to come home either she’d set out just before he came home and the letters keep getting lost in the post and since someone has to watch the kid, he became SAHD and Galadriel in her PTSD is ignoring or has forgotten she has a kids back home or we MPreg it and like seahorses the male elves are the ones that carry the kids and Galadriel doesn’t yet know she has a daughter.....