#modern Archie just Looks Like This. to me

[vastwinterskies]

I am putting Hornblower into the passenger seat in a random fast food drive through. He is holding the wallet and will be responsible for holding the drink tray later. What is going through his little head. compels me.

[cottoncandiescupcakes]

'Ed is problematic' I mean yes obviously

'Izzy is problematic' Little man's a mess

'Stede Bonnet is problematic' Girl that's just Gilderoy Lockhart

But consider... the crew's worst crime

Frenchie: wanted to TURN A MAN'S BACK INTO A TABLE. What the hell Frenchie? Also... became first mate and Captain for NO reason. Pretty privilege is real.

Archie: Seduced Jim ON TOP OF AN UNCONSCIOUS MAN'S CUT OFF, ROTTING LEG. ??? Are you ok Archie.

Jim: Fully went with it because fuck Izzy and fuck his leg. Fuck men, disregard their feelings, look at Archie's boobs instead.

Spanish Jackie: IDK she's flawless. Kill more husbands, cut off more noses, I don't even care. Kill me too, the fuck. It's her world we're all just in it.

The Swede: showing up to Izzy's funeral with his pubes out. The gun show as well but who goes to a funeral with full bush? Like... it's 1720 have some decorum

Roach: Is the cook AND the surgeon but I never see him do either of those things. People are constantly starving, bleeding out, he's just there chilling smoking a cigarette butt

Fang: Keeps gaining pets but THE PETS ALL DISAPPEAR? Where's the goat Fang. WHERE'S THE GOAT. YOU'RE HUGGING THEM TOO HARD FANG.

Lucius: Wearing modern day flared jeans because Nathan Foad bought a pair at Urban Outfitters and they looked so good he refused to take them off. Why, Nathan? This is a crime

Innocent of all charges:

Zheng: A queen we mere mortals shouldn't judge

Oluwande: A baby face isn't a crime as far as I know

Buttons: He just wanted to be a seagull. Does he cannibalize other seagulls now??

[rancidrubysoho]

i think part of what makes the IDW Sonic supporting cast so endearing is how well they fit into the franchise as a whole. like the Archie Sonic characters were created by and large to match the SatAM continuity, which was created by and large to give context to things happening in the games because it was made at a time when audiences knew shit from fuck about these characters or their world... so those characters kinda retroactively just don't mesh with the games at all. they're adjacent to an adjacency to the main franchise, so trying to imagine them existing in the tone and context of the modern games doesn't line up.

but then you look at the IDW characters, and they are entirely, wholly made to fit into the same mold and world as the games without being redundant expies of existing characters. Surge might be "another rival to Sonic", but she fits a narrative purpose Shadow, Knuckles, and Metal Sonic completely don't; the stories you can tell with Surge and Kit are unique to them, and no other characters would fit those roles. same with Tangle and Whisper; they make the world feel lived-in, remind you that things are happening and having an impact on people whenever Sonic and co. aren't onscreen.

they also have that quality that Pit has in Smash Brawl, where they feel like they have this super storied history and evolution over the course of years that we just didn't get to see. until i actually read IDW you could've 100% convinced me the IDW-originals were all updated versions of forgotten side-characters from spin-off games like Dark Brotherhood or Rivals, and i think that says a lot about how well-conceived they all are.

[deliciousangelfestival]

Tears In His Ferrari || Chp 8

Character: Bucky Barnes x Farmer!Reader

Summary: Bucky Barnes, used to a life of luxury, takes on farm challenges in a bet with his father. Mud-stained Ferraris and a rustic farmhouse lead to unexpected personal growth, guided by the stern mentorship of Y/N, a farmer making his city-boy life difficult.

Theme: Fluff, Slice of Life, Heart-Warming.

Main Masterlist || If you enjoy my work, please consider buying me a coffee on: Ko-fi 🙏🏻

Thank you to anyone who gave a like, reblog, and left a comment. It motivated me to write more. 

Chapters: Chp 1, Chp 2, Chp 3 , Chp 4 , Chp 5 , Chp 6 , Chp 7 , Chp 8 , Chp 9 , Chp 10 , Chp 11 , Chp 12.

Kate cautiously stepped into Bucky's house, expecting a picturesque country residence. However, the reality was far from her imagination. The old-fashioned appearance of the house and the lack of modern amenities surprised her.

As she hesitantly explored, a sudden sensation tickled her feet, prompting her to let out a startled scream. To her surprise, it was Archie, Bucky's puppy, licking her shoes. Bucky, equally surprised by Kate's reaction, quickly intervened, "Hey buddy, are you hungry?"

The small, fluffy dog responded with an enthusiastic "Woof." Witnessing Bucky's affection for the little pup, Kate felt compelled to maintain her image as an animal lover, despite her true feelings.

Apologizing for the interruption, Kate approached Archie, attempting to pet him. However, the seemingly docile pup suddenly growled at her. "Grrrr..."

Bucky quickly reprimanded Archie, "Archie, stop it. I'm sorry, Kate. He must be hungry."

Kate, trying to downplay the situation, suggested, "No worries. Perhaps he's just scared because of my long nails. I'll cut them later."

Bucky, feeling guilty, replied, "No, you don't have to. It's not because of your nails." He didn't want Kate to go through the trouble of adjusting her appearance for Archie.

Bucky, observing Archie's unusual behavior, was taken aback. Archie had never growled at anyone before, not even at Alpine, the gentle horse.

It seemed like the little puppy sensed something different about Kate that made him uneasy. Bucky couldn't help but feel puzzled by Archie's atypical reaction.

Bucky, still taken aback by Kate's unexpected visit, gathered the courage to ask her how she found him. Kate, choosing to omit the fact that she interrogated everyone until Steve spilled the information, simply mentioned that she had been following Bucky's vlog and decided to join him.

Feeling a sense of embarrassment about the simplicity of his living conditions, Bucky hesitated, "I didn't expect anyone to find me here. This place is not exactly suitable for—"

Kate quickly interjected, trying to be humble, "Oh, don't worry, Bucky. It's a charming little farm. Luckily, there's a vacation home in the area, and my assistant has booked it for me."

Relieved, Bucky chuckled nervously, "Well, that's good to know. But farming is not as glamorous as it looks in the vlog. It's hard work."

Kate, undeterred, smiled confidently, "I'm up for the challenge. I want to experience it for myself."

Both surprised and impressed by Kate's determination, Bucky agreed, "Sure, you can join. Just be prepared—it's not as easy as it seems in the videos."

As Kate woke up the next day, she grumbled and instructed her assistant to prepare sunscreen promptly. The sun mustn't ruin her flawless skin.

She continued complaining about the food, exhibiting the opposite of the image her P.R. team had carefully crafted – that of a friendly and humble supermodel.

Kate hails from a wealthy family, and her spoiled nature becomes increasingly evident. Her assistant could only roll her eyes discreetly, well aware of the stark contrast between the public persona and the true character of the woman she served.

Kate's arrival at the farm couldn't have come at a less ideal moment – Bucky was deeply engrossed in the care of the cows, and the pungent smell filled the air. While Bucky had long grown accustomed to the farm's unique aromas, Kate found herself less appreciative.

Unaware of Kate's reservations, Bucky continued his farm duties, accompanied by Toby, who diligently recorded the day's activities.

During the live stream, Bucky dropped a startling fact, "Did you know a lot of people are killed by cows every year?" The unexpected revelation prompted a flurry of reactions and comments from the intrigued viewers.

As Kate approached, Bucky, ever the showman, pivoted to include her in the camera frame. The viewers were in for a treat – witnessing the supermodel stepping into the rustic world of Bucky's farm. The comment section erupted with excitement, questions, and exclamations, creating a lively interaction among the audience.

Amidst the commentary flood in the live chat, Bucky seized the opportunity to engage both Kate and the viewers. With a mischievous grin, he turned to Kate and said, "Looks like you've brought a whole new audience to the farm, Kate. What do you think about being a part of my little farming world?"

Kate, ever adaptable, replied with a good-natured smile, "Well, Bucky, it's definitely a change from the runway, but I'm up for the challenge. Who knew farming could be so intriguing?"

The viewers, fueled by excitement, bombarded the chat:

Viewer1: "Kate, what brought you to Bucky's farm? Spill the beans!"

Viewer2: "Bucky, you're living the dream – supermodel on the farm, that's wild!"

Bucky laughed, enjoying the banter, "Well, folks, Kate here wanted a taste of the 'farmer's life,' and here she is. Any questions for our glamorous guest?"

The questions poured in:

Viewer 3: "Kate, are you planning to start your own farm now?"

Kate chuckled, "I don't know about that, but let's see what Bucky has in store for me today."

As the trio gathered for lunch, the farm's usual serenity was interrupted by the sound of hooves approaching. Y/N appeared, her horse bringing her gracefully to the scene. Bucky, ever the courteous host, welcomed her with a warm smile, "Hey, Y/N! Perfect timing. Lunch is served."

Y/N, unimpressed by the attention, Y/N simply nodded, "My mother insisted. Hope you enjoy it."

Bucky introduced Kate, "Y/N, meet Kate. She's joining us on the farm today."

Kate extended a hand, masking her competitiveness with a friendly facade, "Hi, Y/N. Bucky's been showing me the ropes. Your farm is quite charming."

Y/N responded curtly, "Glad you think so. Enjoy your lunch," before returning her attention to Bucky.

Y/N couldn't help but suppress a laugh as she observed Kate's childish antics. There was a striking resemblance between Kate's behavior and someone Y/N knew well.

During the meal, Kate subtly tried to assert her connection with Bucky, linking arms and sharing laughs. Y/N, however, maintained an air of indifference, unswayed by the orchestrated display.

Meanwhile, Bucky focused on showcasing the meal prepared by Y/N. "Folks, today we've got Y/N's special: homemade chicken pot pie. It's become a fan favorite around here."

While eating, Bucky turns off the live streaming. Kate tried to help him by giving him ideas to make his livestream more viewers, "Here's what I was thinking," Kate began, "we could turn part of the farm into a runway for a fashion show. It would be a unique blend of agriculture and high fashion."

Bucky, trying to process the idea, raised an eyebrow, "A runway on a farm? Is that even practical?"

Y/N, not one to mince words, deadpanned, "That's the most amazing bullshit idea I've ever heard."

Toby, who happened to be taking a sip of his drink, burst into laughter, nearly choking on his beverage.

Bucky, caught between politeness and practicality, tried to salvage the situation, "Well, it's not that bad, Y/N."

Kate, however, felt a mix of embarrassment and a chill running down her spine. Y/N's sarcastic remark had a familiar ring reminiscent of the authoritative tone her father often used.

As Kate pondered Y/N's sarcastic comment and the striking familiarity of her father's authoritative tone, another puzzle piece fell into place when she recalled the food Y/N had prepared.

The taste was uncannily similar to the exquisite dishes Kate had experienced in 3-star Michelin restaurants.

It baffled Kate.

How could a farm girl, someone seemingly detached from the glamour of city life, possess culinary skills rivaling those of high-end chefs?

Author Note:

Hey friends,

If you've been enjoying the content, I've set up a Ko-fi account. Your support through tips would mean the world and help me keep creating. Only if you feel like it!

Here's the link: Ko-fi

Thanks a bunch for being fabulous followers!

Join the taglist? 🩷💙🩷

@bagoffeelings

@darkofimagination

@starsofcloud

@cherrybubblebullet

@winterslove1917

@thezombieprostitute

@namoreno

@sagebarness

@tenaciousathleteoperatorgarden

@unaxv

@missvelvetsstuff

@kjah97

@hopeful-daydreaming

@freshlemontea

@eat-limes-bitches

@kandis-mom

@scott-loki-barnes

@winters1917

@differenttyphoonwerewolf

@arunabraganza

@ordelixx

@jackiehollanderr

@regics

@pigeonmama

Hey everyone! 🌟 Your input means the world to me.

If you've got any cool ideas or prompts, whether for this fluff series or any other series, feel free to share them with me!

Just drop them in my ASK/SEND REQUEST box.

Can't wait to hear your awesome suggestions! 🚀💬

[nai-nyeartwork]

The AU you have where Vox is the vintage one and Alastor the modern one has been living in my head rent free. I can’t stop thinking about Vox being all bouncy and cartoony (definitely like you said, Roger Rabbit) and having very cartoon-esque physics and power base. Or Alastor still being radio but very much modern and staying ahead of the game. If you are willing and have any time to indulge me, I would love love love to hear more about your AU!!!

Hey! I'm happy you like this AU. I wish I had more time to explore or write a proper story for it since I have too many ideas for it. For this AU, Vox can upgrade himself to how he normally appears in the show but he honestly prefers staying like a cartoon demon since he thinks he is more powerful in that form. Like breaking the 4th wall and using cartoon logic to mess up hell's landscape/ other demons. When he does switch TV heads, because his retro TV got busted or needs to try a different attack, his powers will changed based on the type of media or how advanced the technology is. I keep thinking he secretly doesn't want Alastor to see him differently than his normal retro look since Vox knows how the Radio demon feels about technology. Since it sort of like a swap AU, Vox has two thralls, Valentino and Velvette instead of forming an alliance with them. He tricked Val into signing a contract with him when the moth demon was struggling with his porn studio or had problems with the shark mafia. While Velvette tried to confront Alastor and Vox to be the new overlord media but lost against Vox. He kept her around since she seemed useful and would call on her more than Val when it came to promoting his or Alastor's broadcasts. Vox still lets his thralls try to make their own business but constantly demands their assistance for random dangerous schemes. If the Vees oppose or try to avoid Vox, then he will control them like puppets with his inky cable wires. The Vees are up to date with hells society even using advanced technology thanks to Alastor, but because they are under contract their appearance remains the way they arrived to hell? Or like vintage animation style? Like Val’s appearance has 70s archie animation/comic style while Velvet's is more 80s lolita anime (kinda like Perfect Blue).  Meanwhile, Alastor still befriends Rosie who also has to catch up with the time. He often promotes her business since Rosie's cannibal town has become more like a meat/food factory. Rosie often repurposes any meat, scales, teeth, and angel feathers/blood to sell at her cannibal markets.

Husker stays as an overlord but owes a favor to the Media Overlords, and often plays host to them whenever they visit his casino. I was gonna make Niffty an overlord too but I haven't decided what type she would be or just be Alastor's assistant.

I kind of want Vox to help the Hazbin Hotel and Charlie (if I don't change her and the other hazbin residents roles too much). He wants to help the hotel because Vox's end game would be controlling them. Alastor only offers to help the hotel when Vox asks him to otherwise he doesn't bother to interact with the other residents or with Charlie since he has a podcast to run.

As for Vox and Alastor's relationship, they can be very professional in front of strangers/public while with associates/friends they get a little affectionate. They are on guard constantly and only trust each other since they are media demons. In private, they are very vulnerable and give each other a lot of aftercare. Or try to have a few mental breaks from upholding an image to the public. Like Vox has a whole-ass aftercare routine when Alastor is stressed and doesn't want to listen to demons due to his radio abilities. He even mutes himself and plays silent films while Alastor hides under a blanket with noise-cancelling headphones on. And when Vox destroys or needs to repair his TV head, Alastor always makes sure to have spare parts and tools on hand to assist him. He is used to repairing Vox and acting like a doctor for him.

They have been together for so long in hell, they lose their shit if the other overlord gets hurt or someone tries to take them away since in their eyes no one else compares.

And that's all I have folks!

[benis-chillin]

IDW's Fang the Hunter and the failure of Neo-Classic Sonic

(In case you're stupid, this is an opinion piece made for discussion)

Greetings, boys and goyles. I'm Benis, otherwise known as Benis Chillin, Sonic lore enthusiast and fanfic writer. I say the latter part because I want people to know that I'm well aware that many of my criticisms are based in the fact that I'm a writer, and unlike most people, I try to run more by objective canon than my whims. I explain it more here.

And per those standards…The current state of Classic Sonic SUCKS.

Now, I am a Modern Sonic fan through and through. I LIKED the 4 main Classic games when I played through them, but Sonic Adventure was the one that truly hooked me in. The world established by that game, and the ones that followed, just have my interest more, and I would prefer things be made in service to THAT.

However, to the greater detriment of society, Sonic Generations happened, and Classic Sonic was reestablished as part of the brand after years of Modern Sonic being THE face of everything, with even collections of Classic games using Modern Sonic artwork. And with the environment of the internet in the 2010's, it's no surprise that they decided to let Classic be its own sort of "brand" with Sonic Mania(bleh)and Forces(less bleh).

But they had a fun spin on it: A split timeline.

As explained above, Classic Sonic was given his own little mini-continuity to run around in, which is actually a brilliant idea, from a brand perspective. Original Classic Sonic had the creative freedom to do whatever the heck he wanted to, since he was the main Sonic. However, new Classic material, or Neo-Classic material, as I shall now refer to it, if left in the main timeline, inherently has the “prequel” problem where things HAVE to have some kind of hook for it to really be worth having another branch of the brand available. I wouldn’t say EVERY brand has this problem, but even the most masterful uses of that format have to deal with the fact that the future is predetermined, and Neo-Classic Sonic material just does not have the leg room to work around that problem.

So, split the timeline, and just do whatever with it. It’s an AU, go nuts! Let a part of the brand reset and grow in a different way for that audience who isn’t into that Modern stuff!

And we had a promising enough start with the 30th anniversary comics! Full of interesting returns that you didn’t really see in the mainline books. Heck, we got an actual look at the design of Metal Knuckles, that was pretty rad!

Bark, Bean, and Fang also had an appearance that made their old Archie team somewhat canon, after they only appeared as illusions in Mania.  Sure, these characters were neat in the Archie comics, but getting a proper form of that in a continuity free of that Satam Stank was nice. This particular comic being a separate thing from my main love, while not diving into the weird stuff that would turn me off from it, inherently made the comic more interesting, even though I’m not much of a Classic Sonic fan.

And so this sentiment continued through the next specials, but something else began to shift on Sega’s side. The dumbassery of single timeline was stated to be the new status quo, and they started acting as such with new Sonic material.

Sonic Superstars came out, too, and my feelings on that are known. Now, after his appearance in the comics had been a bit of a treat, even if you didn't like him, Fang was in an official Sonic game again, with 3D renders to boot!

...But he was still the same jackass with barely any personality that he was before. Because Superstars was TRYING to be like 3&K with its storytelling, while lacking basically every element that made 3&K's storytelling work. Combine the lackluster story and music, both of which were caused by the idea of it being a Neo-Classic game, with the fact that the graphics were 3D, and now the question is being raised of, "Why wasn't this just a Modern Sonic game?" 

Cause from an outsider's perspective, it being a Neo-Classic game only served to hold it back in a ton of ways!

For example, the character of Trip. She seems well liked in the Sonic fanbase, but Sega's kinda funky with how they handle characters being both Classic and Modern. Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, Amy, Eggman, and Metal Sonic seem to be allowed to exist in both parts of the brand, but that's it. 

Knuckles Chaotix is said to be canon, but the Classic Chaotix are unlikely to appear anytime soon since Sonic Heroes soft-rebooted them. Mecha Sonic was allowed to appear in the Modern "Scrapnik Island" mini-series, but I suspect it's seen by Sega as a "modern reboot" rather than a character being allowed to co-exist between the two brands again. Heck, they didn't even have the guts to show the Classic versions of the characters during the flashbacks, even though logically, they were still referencing 3&K.

 So will Trip be allowed to appear in any meaningful way in the future? Probably not, the way things have been going.

So, if all Classic characters can only appear in Neo-Classic material, then the Neo-Classic material has to be as good as it can be, right?

Well, that's where the Fang mini comes in.

Written by Ian Flynn, who has very much been showing how utterly stretched he is across so many Sonic projects lately(even if I would still regard him as a fairly decent writer, just...Has his limits), the Fang mini is the epitome of BORING! 

The basic story is that Fang and his gang are seeking out, "The eighth Chaos Emerald," visit a few people who tell him it doesn't exist, and then Eggman sends him to deal with the Hardboiled Heavies going rogue.

Along the way, Fang is just randomly a dick to his friends, and they end up abandoning his ass at the end because this comic is, for some reason, a direct prequel to Sonic Superstars, and we apparently needed an explanation of why they weren't there?

If my summary didn't sound that bad to you, it's because you don't have to go through the grueling wait that being an IDW Sonic fan entails.

Seriously, the wait between issues of IDW Sonic has become a real problem the past few years. Ever since the Metal Virus ended, the main book has had a massive problem with pacing. 

And sure, there are arcs and ideas I like there, I AM a fan, but not a lot HAPPENS in each issue compared to earlier in the book's run. Even re-reading them, the pace is oddly slow for a book about a fast character, and the issue especially persists here...On top of the main book being paused for a bit so THIS shit could come out.

(Current arc is doing better, though, so hope they keep that up)

Issues 1&2 are wasted with Fang harassing Sonic and Knuckles for a bit that, guess what? Goes nowhere! And then we briefly divert to Fang and co. in a watery old Eggbase so Eggman can capture them and actually get the plot going…3 issues into a 4-issue mini! Then, we finally get to the main event, where all will be revealed! And…

It's the Warp Topaz from the main book. The Hardboiled Heavies found it in a cave, where nobody ELSE knew it was, so it can't be the source of the 8th Chaos Emerald rumors.

Like I told ya, that went NOWHERE!

So they fight the bland-as-shit Heavies, Fang adds the Warp Topaz to his hover bike thing, and the airship is wrecked, leaving Sonic and Tails to have no idea what just happened, their involvement being a complete wash.

And our story ends with Bark and Bean rocketing off in little hovercars that just raise the question of why they didn't use those when Fang threatened to kick them off in Issue 2, since he has no say in whether or not they launch.

I actually managed to ask Ian Flynn about this on the Bumblekast, and this was his response:

Worth noting that the final issue has an additional editor that didn't work on the previous issues. Not saying EVERYONE'S blameless in this, but if I had to choose a weak point…

This mini-series encapsulates every little issue the Neo-Classic line has had since they officially eschewed split timeline.

 It feels the need to go out of its way to explain shit that doesn’t matter, like where Bark and Bean were during Superstars, Fang having the Warp Topaz, but not using it during Superstars creates a gaping plot hole that will not wash away, and it not going away at the end brings up a lot of timeline issues that I can only hope that Knuckles special resolves! 

In fact, why didn’t HE get the mini!?

Even in his Classic state, Knuckles has a LOT more to carry a story with! From the secrets of his island, to the mysteries of his people(which Adventure and the Frontiers promo animation hinted at), to even just doing his own treasure hunts! Heck, you could even pin him against both Fang’s crew and the HBH, and you’ve got enough of a banger to hold 4 action-packed issues right there! 

But no! Instead, we get a book that seems written to depend on the personalities of the protagonists…When said protagonists barely have any personality.

Like, let’s consider Team Chaotix from Sonic Heroes ALONE. Vector is the loud, bombastic leader with a love of music, and true detective skills, as showcased by him figuring out that their employer was Eggman on his own by Rail Canyon. Espio is the disciplined, if a bit full of himself, ninja, taking down the bad guys with stealth and precision, while also being somewhat melodramatic. And Charmy is the excitable ADHD kid of the group who may occasionally want to go off-track and play around in the giant casino area.

These characters are simple, yet so full of personality that you immediately like them(unless you’re a 2010’s YouTuber). THESE guys can hold a narrative.

By comparison, what do Fang’s gang have after 3 comic appearances and Sonic Superstars?

Fang is a hired goon who has goons, Bean is “funny” bomb man, and Bark is the silent strong guy with a soft spot.

That is really it.

And this was FINE back when they were still in “Sega forgot us” territory. Being obscure oddities that we would rarely get in stories actually did a lot of heavy lifting for their more limited personalities. Despite what the current writers seem to feel about such limits, judging by Silver and Blaze's current "vacations" in the main book, characters being rarer can actually endear you to them.

But now, these guys aren't really that rare. In fact, I’d say they’re about equal to Team Chaotix in terms of mass media exposure within the past 5 years, and they’re considerably lacking in comparison. 

Hell, even compared to the characters created RECENTLY in IDW and the Modern games, they're pretty lackluster. Yet I'm supposed to care about these assholes just as much as those guys?

Which, really, is how ALL of the Neo-Classic media feels these days.

Look, I get that Neo-Classic Sonic media doesn’t want to step on the toes of Modern Sonic. I do. But I really think it needs a good shake-up.

Quit treating it like it’s this special thing, because it isn’t anymore. Find a more solid identity for this branch of Sonic if you want it to survive, cause THIS doesn’t cut it anymore.

AND ACKNOWLEDGE THAT TIMELINE SPLIT ESTABLISHED IN A MAINLINE GAME, DAMNIT! THERE’S A STORY IN UNDOING THAT! TELL IT, OR I WILL!

[unabashednightmarepizza]

𝑆ℎ𝑎𝑑𝑜𝑤 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝐵𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝐶ℎ𝑟𝑜𝑛𝑖𝑐𝑙𝑒𝑠, 𝑃𝑎𝑟𝑡 2

Tagging: @bloody-mf-bsc

Liked by freddycarter1, kittheyounger, benbarnes and 5,795,598 others

Y/N Y/L/N: Field Day ❤️‍🔥🏜️

View 546,923 comments

freddycarter1: I'm telling you, this woman has problems. A "Field Day" is supposed to be fun, not scorching.

Y/N Y/L/N: Ancient civilisations lived like that and they were fine 😑

freddycarter1: They DIED! And we are in modern times, if it wasn't for Amita and Danielle, we would be one of those skeletons in the corner!

freddycarter1: And yes, there were skeletons! See the TRUE side of your precious, her fans!

User3: She could do no wrong😒

Y/N Y/L/N: Ahh, yes, I had to think of the ladies...🥰 And then you and the others.😒

Y/N Y/L/N: @ user3 my babies, I knew you would back me up 🥰 SUCK THAT FREDDY 🖕

kittheyounger: benbarnes, come and get your woman from here. She is bullying us!

Y/N Y/L/N: What gave you the idea that I don't bully him already?

User2: Y/N's clear love for the women of the cast is... Just so us.

Liked by benbarnes, archierenaux3, pascalispunk, milliebobbiebrown and 6,745,352 others

Y/N Y/L/N: Archie said it wasn't that hard to be the Darkling

1. This is just Ben waiting like a Karen so that this "bullshit" would stop.

2. And this is Ben when he actually realized that Archie looked good doing it.

View 785,545 comments

benbarnes: How dare you call me a "Karen" woman?! I call you "love of my life" and that's what I get?

Y/N Y/L/N: But you love me~ 🤭🤗🥰 Besides you don't need to be told that, you are the most handsome man to me!

benbarnes: You know other men? 🤨

Y/N Y/L/N: Seriously? ರ⁠_⁠ರ

User5: Now, Ben is also being a gremlin lol

User3: Only Y/N could call Ben a "Karen" and I'd be fine with it..

User5: She calls us "her gremlins" but at this point, she is the gremlin of all gremlins 😂

User6: Somewhere down the comments, It's said that Y/N had found her new victim, none other than DADDY PEDRO

User5: Their energy matches so well, both chaotic and energetic

User1: And add Oscar too... OMG THE GREMLIN TRIO *WAR SOUNDS*

User2: Ben Barnes Slander made by Y/N affectionetly had started again. Sorrows... sorrows, prayers.

pascalispunk: Suddenly I'm scared of having her around after all of her chaotic posts, and even more chaotic captions...

Y/N Y/L/N: You should be, I'm coming for you next after we're done with those dorks

Liked by jessie_mei_li, benbarnes, blakelively and 7,677,421 others

Y/N Y/L/N: Uhm, excuse me but what the actual fuck? Can you get your hands off of my wives benbarnes?

User2: It's official: Y/N is a simp for Jessie the most and a big fan of her ladies lol

User4: Today, folks, even Ben Barnes lost to women

User5: But is it trully a loss if It's SaB women?

shadowandbone: Once again, women 🌠

User2: I think SaB account is also run by her...

User8: Where is Amita, Daisy and Sujaya? 🤔

Y/N Y/L/N: Safe in my room.🫦

User8: and Anna?

Y/N Y/L/N: I'm safe in her room.

User4: If Y/N was a Man, she would be the greenest green flag

Hater1: or a red flag... ı don't understand how everyone can love her so much. She is so annoying

User3: you can dislike her but never insult her like that. One, she has millions of fans two, she is almost the backbone of the industry and three, her man is overprotective asf

User2: @user3 don't bother too much, girl. Queen Y/N doesn't care about what the other think of her

User3: Say what you want, but I'm sure she cheated on Ben with one of them, or who knows? Maybe Ben also did it? Look at how he is with Jessie and say it to my face

User3: wtf is wrong with you? Neither Ben nor Y/N would ever do that. They had been together for almost three years and are committed to each other! They trust each other immensely which already means a lot to both of them, and shows us the deep connection they have. They are both succesfull, they already met their families and will probably get married soon and be happy with each other forever! And don't even bring my Jessie into this, she is the sweetest soul ever and she is like that with everyone else! She told many times that she was so nervous to shoot her scenes with Ben because she thought Y/M would be angry but our Queen never did and rrusted Ben, which isn't an easy feat for her! If you aren't a delulu girl, I don't know what you are and stay away from our beautiful and cute Y/N and her amazing boyfriend benbarnes! Liked by Y/N Y/L/N and benbarnes

User4: Sis ate up and left now crumbs user3, amazing human being really...

User3: and I'm calling the dibs on their wedding! This is literally the only thing I want and my mum tells me that I wasn't that passionate and eager to go to college... So, imagine my state right now (⁠ﾉ⁠≧⁠∇⁠≦⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠ ⁠ﾐ⁠ ⁠┻⁠━⁠┻

User9: When did this shit go south like that?? Let our parents live their lives peacefully you jealous shits! Are yall blind to not see the obvious love in both their eyes? I can take you to visit a doctor??

SaB.memes: Just a quick question: What was your first reaction when you saw Danielle in the audition?

Y/N: I fell down from my fucking chair, that is what happened.

SaB.memes: and what about the Blake Lively liking your chaotic posts? 🤔

User3: You shouldn't have pointed that out *looks at Y/N worriedly*

Y/N Y/L/N: She didn't like my- HOLY SHIT, IT'S THE FUCKING BLAKE LIVELY?! *screeches like a dinosaur* JUST ONE CHANCE PLEASE!

User3: yep, the reaction we all expexted

Y/N Y/L/N: People had been asking me to share some Ben appreciation because I had been bullying him... And since he doesn't agree on talking to me unless I make a fluffy post about him, and he is backed up by the fans, here it is... I guess?

1. Said this one was for me before he went and shot the most obsecure and violent scene we ever did... Gee, thanks😑

2. Can you get off of my throne? You lost your chance 600 years ago!

3. This is just Ben turning crispy and flirting with me , using a corny pick-up line like "There she is, my saviour angel!"... Sir, I'm the reason you are burning in that costume😑

View 456,989 comments

User4: Y/N slandering Darkling is forever gonna be carved into my mind.

Y/N Y/L/N: Darkling deserves to be punched, rolled over, stabbed, burnt and every other thing... But my Ben only deserves to be coddled and well-taken care of as I babygirl him

User5: I don't know why... But suddenly, a tear ran down my legs at her possessive usage of "my Ben". Was it just me? (⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ )

User5: No bestie... I think I just flushed so bad that I had to take a breather (⁠●⁠_⁠_⁠●⁠)

User4: It's official ladies! Ben Barnes is getting the babygirl treatment! As he should djjddj

User7: Do you guys think Ben stalks her page and giggles like a highschool girl whenever he sees her posts?

User1: would be a shame if he didn't

amita_suman: to add to the comments, he blushes until he is a walking tomato too!

freddycarter1: and we confirm that yes, he does all of that indeed.

jessie_mei_li: And yes, he read her comment with "my Ben" and now we can't find hım... They are either making out right now, or he is hiding. Either way, he was so red 🤣

Liked by benbarnes, freddycarter1, vancityreynolds, amita_suman and 7,896,995 others

Y/N Y/L/N: Be grateful for me and my holy ability to take unexpected yet amazing photos. Eat them up everyone!

View 897,698 comments

User5: our lord and saviour has blessed us once again🤲

User4: Had it been not for her, we wouldn't start our day good

freddycarter1: As usual, I'm looking good.

Y/N Y/L/N: Only thanks to me and your wife Kazzle Dazzle

User7: Y/N knows what she is doing... And she is having her fun

User9: There doesn't go a day without her bullying them at least once 🤣

Y/N.Fanpage: She wakes up, looks at Ben's sleeping face and just decides that It's a good day to bully him as she prepares her coloring pencils 😌

User2: What?! OMG I CAN'T- She didn't right? 🤣

Y/N.Fanpage: she did! And he didn't leave the house for the whole day and trapped her inside with him... iykyk 😉😏

User5: OMG-

benbarnes: RYAN REYNOLDS LIKED YOUR POST?

Y/N Y/L/N: said the man who avoided me because I had the same reaction with Blake 😒😑

freddycarter1: do you both have to simp for everyone?

Y/N Y/L/N: We are appreciating the God's work, Freddy... AND RYAN AND BLAKE ARE NOT EVERYONE!😡

benbarnes: Well-said, my love! Peasants like hım wouldn't understand...

User6: To see both of them having a weak spot for Ryan and Blake is... My two parents showing their love for each other 🥹

User4: Blake and Y/N are good friends for years now, and seeing that they are both happy with their lovers is just so beautiful

User8: yeah, they both went through hard times alone together. Seeing them find their other halves is so nice!

blakelively: It's so nice to see you both so well, love! Missed you so much ❤️

Y/N Y/L/N: Me too, Blake! Gosh, it has been soooo long... How are my precious nieces?

blakelively: missing their auntie as usual! And the newest one is eager to meet you too! On thursday? The usual? 😉

Y/N Y/L/N: You bet! And Ben can finally shut up about me being have to introduce Ryan and him

vancityreynolds: Please don't play monopoly...

benbarnes: Too late... She is already grinning like a cheshire cat and is very eager to use her "Crows tactics"...

vancityreynolds: We are doomed...

User6: both Ben and Ryan being uxorious for their lovers is what we ladies need to look for in a man

User10: Y/N, what's the thing you love about Ben the most?

Y/N Y/L/N: Aww, such a sweet question coming from such a sweet person! The answer is: Everything...😍🥰☺️. Liked by benbarnes

User10: OMG you both are so cute! Thank you for answering and being who you are! Have a good day both of you! Liked by benbarnes and Y/N Y/L/N

[saturnaftertaste]

I would like to hear your hirarchie opinions!

oh anon, you’re too sweet. you do spoil me so ♡

so, my take on hirarchie?

look. as a feminist, my first thought in the archie-ronnie-hiram subplot/relationship triangle will always be veronica. as such, my thoughts on hirarchie come from the angle of thinking about veronica, who is a very interesting figure in the case of the Jughead-Narrated Riverdale Universe.

first of all - veronica is a legacy outsider to Riverdale. i’ve mentioned this before, but out of s1’s protagonist cast, ronnie was the only one to not be white. not only this, but hiram’s history itself starts outside of riverdale. unlike betty | alice, archie | fred, cheryl | penelope, jughead | fp, veronica | hiram do not have history here. in fact, archie, betty, jughead, and cheryl all have direct ancestors who landed in riverdale in 1580 - i.e. as per colonial “american” practice, the town was “built” by them and their descendants.

so what role do the lodges play in all of this? the blossoms are rich, the andrews’ are good, the coopers are cunning and the joneses write the history, so what role do the lodges play in the existence of riverdale? are they even necessary for that existence? my point is this - nothing happens in riverdale until a lodge shows up.

think about it! we’ve seen riverdale prime start up twice - once in season 1, once in season 7. a lot of people pin jughead’s narration from s1 on jason blossom’s death (“little miss inciting incident”) but my take on this is that the starting point of any riverdale story is the entrance of a lodge. one of my main riverdale theories is that while the events of s1-4 are narrated by jughead, s5-7 are original written pieces by jughead within the meta of the river-verse. as given in the canon, jughead is not a very good writer - so to keep riverdale afloat from s5-7, the stories he tells are essentially ripped off from the first four of seasons, remixed and then re-presented: hence, when s7 starts in the 50s, it starts on the day when veronica comes to town, just like s1, except there is no murder; jason blossom doesn’t exist.

what does this have to do with archie? good question. i’m getting there (i promise. i hope).

this post by @/wallbeatjournal talks about how just because archie and hiram aren’t related, it doesn’t make it any less incestuous. that is what got me thinking about the riverdale citizens’ roles in their society. as the town pares down in terms of citizens, season by season, and the “following in. families’ footsteps” themes become more and more in-your-face, one must question the cycles and where they came from. interestingly enough, the modern-day riverdalians are 1-to-1 copies of their ancestors, with a specific focus on gender. the farthest ancestors shown are not patriarchal heads of houses— instead you have: asher andrews, blessing cooper, james jones, charity blossom. obviously, we do not know if these are “true”; as per my personal theory, this is all jughead making filler backstory for s6 bc he’s alone and trapped in an empty bunker trying to power a dead universe for himself. however, the genders and the naming conventions match our current protagonists. moving forward in time and referencing the parents of the riverdale citizens, all of them who have a historical colonial ancestor become one of their parents, usually looking like one of them as well, despite the end goal being to break out of their cycles of perpetual violence; usually, the parent they become is the one they share a gender with:

betty is the “gang leader’s girlfriend/perfect small-town girl/thrill-seeking investigator” -> all roles alice has occupied, in that order. notice how despite hal’s attempted influence on her, she does not become a serial killer.

jughead is the “writer/gang leader/scholarship kid/alcoholic” -> roles both F.P and his grandfather occupied. he is incapable of leaving riverdale permanently, like F.P., but unlike gladys who left prior to any inciting incident.

cheryl is the “alive half of a pair/center of tragedy/repressed rich kid/witch” -> roles occupied by penelope blossom as more of the story is unveiled, reflecting cheryl’s life? or cheryl reflecting penelope? (remember, clifford blossom dies before s1 is up, so in this way, jason and clifford match in that they are the Dead ones.)

(remember, this is all through the jughead lens, so it’s all subjective. anyway)*

so where does that leave archiekins and veronica?

veronica is interesting, like i said before. she has no colonial ancestor; her ties to riverdale do not extend beyond hiram’s own. in fact, you could say that veronica and hiram have no ties to riverdale at all, since it was jaime luna that came to riverdale, and hiram lodge who left to manhattan after he married hermione.

veronica is also interesting in that she’s the only one out of the main cast to not be the same gender as her primary-complex-relationship parent. although hiram is not present for season 1, most of veronica’s conflict still stems from his existence as her father. veronica is a girl, yet she does not resemble hermione in her riverdale role**; she is her father’s daughter, constantly actively fighting him while mirroring his own traits. the owning of businesses, the murderous intent, the guns for hire (reggie, circa s3?) thé illegal activity? the mob interactions? she is not a gangster’s moll like hermione ends up as; she is the gangster. remember that episode when they all got sent to therapy in the guise of “college counseling” in their senior year? it’s openly stated that one interpretation of hiram and veronica’s relationship is combative, and that hiram doesn’t see her as an extension of himself, but rather an outside agent who might take his place (hence veronica has to “beat” him to win.)

all this to say that the lodges are, on a narrative level, instigators. (the party don’t start till i walk in! - veronica lodge, 2017) not the blossoms. veronica comes to town, and the story starts. hiram comes to town, and veronica and hiram start fighting on various battlegrounds, for some unnamed, constantly shifting purpose. the lodges do not belong in riverdale, and the story is aware of this, but the story/the town also knows that it cannot exist in reality without the lodges jumpstarting it’s existence. only one lodge can bring back the other (veronica in riverdale brings hiram to riverdale; hiram’s nefarious plans for sunnydale truly bring veronica back to riverdale); only one lodge can get rid of the other (hiram attempts to send veronica to harvard, veronica chases him out of town with the shotgun AND orders a hit on him), and yet - the town needs one lodge to keep things moving (the juvenile prison, the speakeasy under pops. the sunnydale development project, the babylonium) the lodges are the only access to growth and change the town has. otherwise, it sits on its haunches, repeatedly producing people who are named like their ancestors and look&behave like their parents.

all except for one person; the one person who becomes the rope in the lodges’ metaphorical game of tug-of-war.

see, archie, through the jughead lens, is special. archie is complex. where everyone else has to be bent to fit a stereotype (girl next door, rich girl, tragic victim, mindless jock, gay best friend), jughead’s narration expands to fill in the gaps about archie (he was a victim? he was clout-chasing football star? a musician? a folk hero?every government service? he fought a bear???) archie, i think, is the only one he allows free will/choices—archie is his protagonist, so he must have a story, but also is the object of his affection. hence, archie “tries” to be like his perception of his father (“good” “kind”, “strong”, male) but often ends up behaving like his mother (leaves people, bisexual***, protective, desperate for the american dream****, redheaded) while also making other choices - presumably, those choices were based in the reality that jughead is recording from s1-s4, and everyone’s actions around archie’s choices are folded into their characters to the fit the stereotypes and story arcs they inhabit.

so what happens when an instigator meets the only other person in their path who has free will? when veronica comes into contact with archie, she jumpstarts the betty/archie thing that supposedly has been simmering for years. when hiram comes into contact with archie, archie unlocks a new ability to take matters into his own hands. veronica consistently enables the choices that archie makes, whether good or bad, and hiram constantly unlocks new levels of action in archie, whether good or bad.

hiram’s influence on archie is obviously paralleled with hiram’s own story, but instead of inflicting it on his daughter who he comes into conflict with, he tries to instigate new levels of action from archie. i think if hiram had had a son, riverdale as a story would cease to exist because the point of lodges, (and i do mean lodges, not lunas) is to be different, even to each other - hence them creating change. riverdale’s near-all-white population in hiram’s years? he moves there, and now the town has someone new and different to them in poverty. his daughter comes to riverdale, and all of a sudden the entire social balance and relationship structures of the town’s youth are upended, because she’s new and different to them and rich. he becomes a lodge; she becomes a luna. he pushes archie to take action (i.e, red circle); she takes actions for archie (raising money for the community center). if veronica had been a son, chances are he would’ve followed so completely in hiram’s steps that he wouldn’t have come to riverdale at all.

why else would they fight as equals? only one of them can be in riverdale at a time. otherwise, they cancel out - hiram puts archie in prison, ronnie gets him out. hiram buys pop’s? ronnie buys pop’s back. and so on and so forth.

hirarchie exists and functions because hiram is one of the only two factors the town can rely on for any kind of change, and archie is jughead’s clumsy (remember he’s a bad writer!) projection of the town’s soul onto his best friend; thus archie is at the mercy of the lodges because the town wishes to express itself through a story, and a story requires conflict, something that cannot be produced without the presence of an outsider.

*the jughead lens is both misogynistic and apathetic but most importantly it’s simplistic. jughead himself does not make it as a writer in nyc beyond his one book - this is because he is unable to write characters that cannot eventually be folded into one-dimensional tropes that are very obviously props for his own opinions and desires.

**side note: while hermione does not have any ancestors mentioned in historical riverdale, someone matching a younger version of her/teenage veronica does exist in rivervale. this, along with teenage hermione’s description of her mother’s job cleaning houses in the “midnight club” episode, establishes that hermione may have been here longer than hiram — and yet, veronica only follows hiram’s patterns, not hermione or her unnamed grandmothers’.

***bisexuality is presumed on account of the interest-in-reggie-and-jughead sub?text and the absence-is-presence of jarchie in the polycule from s7.

****it is implied that mary explores her sexuality after she leaves fred (at least, that’s how i remember it, please correct me if i’m wrong) and the marrying fred and settling into the american dream as fast as possible draws parallels with archie being desperate to maintain “normal” - the wedding fantasies with veronica in s2, the trying to make it work with betty in s5, the insistence on a baby in s6 - this, apart from the red hair, is the greatest similarity archie has with his mother.

[bengiyo]

Marahuyo Project Eps 1 & 2 Stray Thoughts

I am so excited about this show! Anima Studios was behind Gaya sa Pelikula (Like in the Movies), and JP Habac is back directing. They even got Adrian Lindayag from The Boy Foretold by the Stars and Love Beneath the Stars, and they got Tommy Alejandrino from The Day I Loved You. I am so ready.

Episode 1 – Amihan

I do like opening with a quick queer history lesson reminding that much of our modern homophobic experience is a byproduct of imperialism.

Look at them!! I missed you, boys!

Hold on, I’m already ascending over these two giving each other the signal to kiss in front of the dean.

Homophobe down!

I wonder if we’ll see the macho dad later. I’m looking forward to the mom drama.

Not the fish going flying during a Crash Into You moment.

Points to grandma for knowing more terms, but you can’t just ask this boy that kinda stuff!

I think the actress playing the mom is Sue Prado, who also played Cairo’s mom in Gameboys.

Okay, I love his internal monologue and that he chides himself with feminine pronouns. Good shout out on that @lurkingshan

OOF. It’s missing my grandmothers hours.

Oh hey we’re gonna keep going with the spectrum. Very relieved to be outside of the bubble again.

Oh, I like the name Venice.

That reaction to the extended LGBTQIA+ was really elegant. Sometimes it’s easy to get caught up in some of the internal politics, but folks away from major population centers are so isolated that the specific terminology is just not their priority, and they don’t get the updates.

Lovi Poe mentioned!! Everyone go watch Sleep With Me on GagaOOlala!!

I want you all to know that @yankeebastard and I call each other “sis” all the time. I’m having a great time.

Oh no they’re gonna throw my boy into the pool.

There it is.

You win this round, President Fish Boy.

Episode 2 – Dios Buhawi

Oh, that was too aggressive, King, but I feel you.

Yes! Call your friends! I was worried they’d be out of the picture after the expulsion.

Damn, it really be your own people dragging you. Juvy called out King’s crush so fast.

It’s really refreshing to watch a show wearing its politics on its sleeves.

I’m really intrigued by the way this show breaks the fourth wall. I’m going to have to think about what role we fill in King’s existence.

Okay, the gibberish bit was funny.

Lorena Gomez, are you family?

About to cry about this dress scene.

Lorena and Lili, are you two best friends in love with each other in an unexpressed way??

Yes, drag his ass. Shut the fuck up, Marco.

Venice suffering in the heat should not be this funny.

I am curious what “friendly recruiter” King looks like.

Yes, what is the tea on Archie?

I do love King. Reminds me of a boy who protected me when I was a refugee. I watched him fight four boys on a stairwell and win.

Crash Into You again??? And in front of everyone!

Now, Marco, what the fuck was that look?

Ino, you ain’t fooling me trying to suss out how much King likes you, or if he has a boyfriend back in Manila.

Ino, you ain’t gotta stand that close to King.

Interesting. I think Archie was warning Venice to hide after the dean showed up.

Thankfully the front of his mullet blends in with the background.

BESTIES, WE ARE SO FUCKING BACK! This is so good right out of the gate. I love that King is such a warrior. He’s not passive at all, and everyone clocks him so quickly. I’m so ready to see what Ino is going to do since he can’t help but flirt with King. I have big hopes for Lorena and Lili. It feels so good to be back in a well-produced show from the Philippines with a huge heart and a lot to say. I feel restored.

[edgy-ella]

Ok now that Superstars is out and people like it (mostly) can we PLEASE put Fang in the modern games/comics please. Let him talk. Give him a cooler gun (preferably some high tech laser revolver that aesthetically matches his bike). Make him a reoccurring mini boss. I don’t care. I’m just dying to see him interact with the modern cast in the games. Like:

Rouge: Rouge is a government secret agent that was formerly(?) a jewel thief. So she used to be an outlaw just like Fang, but is now one of the “good guys” while he’s still a hitman bounty hunter. Have these two ever crossed paths before? How would they interact with each other? How would they challenge each other’s viewpoints and vice versa?

Shadow: Fang used guns and bikes first! I want a scene where Fang accuses Shadow of cribbing his style. Also since Fang has been M.I.A. since before SA2 (I imagine he finally got arrested lol), it’d be funny if there was some scene where Fang’s like “what are you, Sonic’s emo cousin or something” then someone has to explain Shadow’s Lore™ to him and it just instantly cuts away to Fang’s confused yet horrified stare. Could also be a fun way to introduce Shadow’s backstory to newer fans.

The Chaotix: There’s a great arc in the Archie comics where Fang + Bark and Bean are looking for the same Chaos Emerald Team Chaotix (and Knuckles) is looking for. I honestly just want more of that. Fang and his boys bounce off of the detectives so naturally that you could convince me that they were planned to be intentional foils to each other

Silver: I think it’d be funny to have a scene/running gag where Silver, who’s from the future, goes on about how everyone in the main cast is considered a legendary hero/infamous villain by his time, then Fang shows up and Silver’s just like “uh, who are you?” and Fang is slightly offended over it

I don’t know if Sega still has their weird “classic characters can’t appear in modern games” rule, but Tailstube and some miscellaneous tweets show that the modern cast is allowed to at least recall the classic games as past adventures. So it really feels like there’s no reason to not put him (or any of the “classic” characters) in a modern title.

Sega please you’re doing so well just bring him home

[mama-qwerty]

Alone Together

Okay, so I'm in a Knuckles-focused discord server and we toss ideas back and forth like ping-pong balls, sometimes resulting in me vomiting out a little scene from it.

So for this one, we got talking about an event where the Master Emerald pulls ALL the versions of Knux into one place, ala Spiderverse style. Dread, naturally, would be seen as that one weird cousin no one really likes but has to invite anyway, and it got me thinking about maybe how Boom would deal with him. Here's the result.

Check out the Knucklesverse guide for more deets.

Enjoy!

~~~~~

The tall echidna stood in the room, looking around himself nervously. It was a large space, with strange architecture bordering the perimeter. He wasn’t exactly clear how he got here, but was certain it had something to do with the giant green gem hovering above their heads.

The Master Emerald.

He didn’t know how he knew what it was, but nonetheless, there the information was. There . . . a lot of information was, all of a sudden. It was as if his mind were a pool of water, with dozens of puzzle pieces floating haphazardly within it, and now those pieces had snapped into place properly.

For the first time in his life, Knuckles could think clearly.

It was . . . strange. Suddenly having new information in your head. Just . . . knowing things. Not as strange as being in a room with what appeared to be a lot of different versions of, well, yourself, but strange anyway.

He fidgeted with the wrappings around his hands—hands that had individually wrapped fingers instead of large mitts like all the other echidna in the room. They were like him, but . . . different. Each echidna had the same red fur, the same white crescent moon on his chest, and the same kinked tail. But they were all smaller than him, and some wore clothing. They were all technically “Knuckles”, but his mind conjured different names as his eyes floated over them.

OVA. Archie. Sinbad. StC. Sir Gawain. Classic. Prime. Modern. IDW. Renegade. Wachowski. Gnarly. Forces.

His brows furrowed. Those names didn’t make any sense, but he supposed they had to have some way of telling each other apart. They couldn’t exactly just call each other “Knuckles”, now could they? That would get confusing.

He thought about himself, and the word ‘Boom’ came to mind.

Huh. That’s . . . that’s weird.

Giving his head a shake, Boom watched as the smaller hims chatted and interacted. He’d been invited to join a few conversations, but had nothing to add when the other echidna spoke of their ‘guardian duties’. He wasn’t exactly sure what that meant, so he had simply wandered off.

And now he felt alone in this crowd. This collection of other versions of himself.

Boom sighed, wondering when he could go home. Not that he was eager to lose this newfound clarity in his mind, but being here made him feel odd. Like he was supposed to be part of this group, but just . . . wasn’t, for some reason.

The tall echidna rubbed the back of his neck, glancing around himself again, taking in the carvings on the walls. He’d never seen any of this before, but it seemed strangely familiar to him. He turned to look at the wall behind him, and found another Knuckles sitting against it, his knees drawn up to his chin.

A name came to his mind.

Dread.

The echidna was dressed like a pirate, and snarled at any of the other Knuckles’ who happened to glance his way. He was doing a pretty decent job of keeping himself isolated, but didn’t really look all that happy about it.

Boom was nothing if not friendly. He approached the little pirate, a little smile on his lips.

“Hey there, little guy,” he said, crossing his arms as he looked down at the other him. “Feeling kinda left out?”

Dread scoffed, keeping his eyes averted. “As though ye cared. All the others feel some sort of weird bonding with each other. I don't. I be nothin' like them.”

Boom tilted his head slightly, glancing back at the group of echidna behind him. Gnarly and Renegade chatted, while Modern and Classic listened in, nodding. Yeah, he supposed they were very similar in a lot of ways, so of course they'd get along. They were all the same person, technically speaking. They were him, and he was them.

It was really, really weird when he thought about it too much.

The taller echidna turned back to Dread, shrugging. “I'm not like them, either.”

Dread rolled his eyes, but still wouldn’t face Boom. “That’s a load o’ barnacles. Ye're more like them than ye realize. Don't patronize me, ya scallywag.”

Boom shrugged again as he lowered himself to sit cross-legged before Dread. “Most of them have something called the Master Emerald. I don't have anything like that. And I don't talk like them. I don't look like them. I mean, I kinda do, but I'm pretty different. But that doesn't mean it's bad, I don’t think.”

“All they see when they see me is a smelly, rotten pirate,” Dread sneered, baring his fangs at the others. “I don't belong here. They know it, and I know it.”

“Well,” Boom said, his brow furrowing as he thought. “Maybe they don't think you belong here, because you don't think you belong here.”

Dread turned to face Boom fully, his muzzle pulled into a snarl. “Are ye tryin' t' get into me head?” he growled. “Don't turn this around on me. I know I've done wrong. I know I can't be trusted. They know it, too. Why do ye want me t’ think otherwise?”

Silence settled over them, and Boom twisted his mouth as he thought. Why did he? There were plenty of other Knuckles' to be friends with, ones who were much more inviting and accepting of his friendship. So why was he focused on Dread? What did he care if this version of himself was left out and lonely?

“Maybe,” the taller echidna said, speaking slowly as he chose his words carefully. "Maybe it's because you're different, like me. Maybe I don't feel like I belong with the others either, because they're so much more serious and smarter and know what they're meant to do with their life. Maybe I see you, and I see a Knuckles who maybe doesn't have that sure path. Someone who's just trying to figure it out, like me."

Dread seemed to contemplate what his larger counterpart said. The ever-present furrow in his brow smoothed, and he flicked his violet eyes up to meet Boom's identical ones.

“Ye feel it, too?” he asked, his voice softer than Boom had ever heard it. “That feeling. Like there be somethin' missin' in yer life. But ye can't put ye're finger on what. And it be like a gnat, buzzin' in ye're ear. Always there, but slightly outta phase.”

Boom tilted his head, thinking about how Dread had phrased it. Finally he nodded.

“Yeah. That's kinda what it's like. Like . . . I know I should be doing something important. Something that matters. But . . .” He shrugged. “I don't know what.”

Dread lowered his head, resting his chin on his knees.

“I've always wanted to be someone important,” he said, his gaze dropping to float across the floor in front of him. “Be seen. Be recognized as the fiercest pirate in all the seven seas. The idea of being unknown is almost painful to me. And I thought the Prism Shard would do that. Suppose it did. But . . .” He shook his head, his brow furrowing. “It did something to me. And I wasn't happy. I didn't feel like me. Or the me I was supposed to be.”

Boom nodded slightly, glancing over his shoulder at the other echidnas. The other Knuckles'. The other hims. But they weren't him. It was weird. He turned back to the pirate with a sigh.

“They seem to have it all figured out, don't they? Even Gnarly and Renegade. They don't have one of those Master Emerald things, but they feel the pull from it and just know who they're supposed to be. But me? I feel it, but I don't FEEL it. Like, I know it's there, and it helps me feel . . . I dunno, more in step with the world around me. But it just doesn't feel like . . . like it's me.”

Dread nodded, uttering his own sigh. “Aye, it be like a hand on the back of ye're neck, guiding. But it feels wrong somehow. Like it was never meant for me.” He flicked his eyes up to Boom. “Us.”

Boom leaned forward, his brow furrowed slightly. “Does . . . does that mean there's something wrong with us?”

Dread didn't answer right away. He looked over at the other Knuckles'. They were so much more accepting of this new connection. This new duty of guarding the Master Emerald, and helping to balance chaos energy. It was all so strange to him. He still didn't fully understand it, or wrap his head around it all. Life was so much easier when all he had to worry about was his next treasure hunt, and keeping himself alive.

“I dunno, lad,” he said finally. “They all seemed to have fallen into step without question or doubt. Maybe that be the way it should be. Or maybe having some healthy fear and doubt about something different than you've always known be wiser.”

Boom gave a little snort of laughter. “I've never been accused of being smart,” he said, shaking his head. “Always been kind of an airhead my whole life.” He paused, a thoughtful look on his face. “But . . . I feel like I can think better now. Like my mind isn't all jumbled and noisy like it was before.”

Dread nodded, a nearly identical expression on his face. “Aye, I know what ye mean. My mind also be . . . quieter. It always felt like I had so much noise in my head, like some sort of buzzing or itchy feeling. But now . . . it be gone.”

The two sat quietly for a while, thinking their thoughts and shooting little glances over at the rest of their new tribe. A tribe of one, split into many. It was strange--being in a crowd but seeing your own eyes staring back at you, hearing variations of your own voice. The personalities were different, but there was that similarity, deep down at their core.

“Thank ye,” Dread said, startling Boom from his thoughts. “For sittin' with me. They all mistrust me because of what I did on my world. And to be fair, I can't blame them. I was . . . pretty bad. I wasn't thinkin' straight.”

Boom smiled, giving him a shrug. “Hey, don't worry about it. When you have a noisy, itchy brain, you do things you probably wouldn't now. I'm usually ignored on my world, because, like I said, airhead.”

Dread smirked, his gold tooth glinting in the light. “I don't think ye're an airhead. Ye seem pretty wise, to me.”

Boom chuckled. “And you don't seem like some smelly ol' pirate to me. Just a guy who maybe needed a friend.”

The pirate chuckled back, and held his hand out. “Aye. We are well met, Boom.”

Boom reached out to complete the handshake. “Right back atcha, Dread.”

~~~

Like this? Check out my other snippets. Reblogs are appreciated!

[liriostigre]

Hiiii ty for such a great uquiz!! Would it be possible to see the description of all the books you could get matched to? I’m curious what the vibes are for the rest!!

hi 🌷 here you go:

White Teeth by Zadie Smith: Excessive, maximalist and very ambitious multigenerational and multicultural epic novel that starts with the unlikely friendship between Archie Jones and Samad Iqbal. It explores themes of race, identity and the intersections of culture, heritage, and modernity. Clever and hilarious dialogue, very creative when it comes to language and style, unique and bold when it comes to narrative. Perhaps a flawed novel due to its ambition, but excellent nonetheless.

Despair by Vladimir Nabokov: Excellent writing; very ambitious and stylish. It is somewhat a twisted novel but you will find a lot of humor despite. The narrator speaks directly to the reader as he writes what he regards as his perfect crime. This novel is one of Nabokov's earliest works in which one can easily identify themes and literary devices that the author explored later in his most known works.

The Savage Detectives by Roberto Bolaño: Brilliant and stunning novel about poets and poetry! Very dense and challenging; it requires patience from the reader. This novel is so infinitely dear to me that i can't even explain its brilliance, but i have to give you at least an idea of the plot so: The story is arranged in three parts and told from multiple points of view. It starts in Mexico City, in the 70s, and continues across decades and continents. It follows the adventures and misadventures of Arturo Belano and Ulises Lima—poets, drug dealers, wanderes, criminals. Now, about the themes, the writing, the style, the narration? Just absolutely perfect even at its most tedious, difficult and anticlimactic parts.

The Hearing Trumpet by Leonora Carrington: Unconventional, absurd, imaginative and exuberantly surreal apocalyptic fairytale quest. It follows 92 year old Marian who is sent off to a peculiar old-age home. If you aren't familiar with Leanora Carrington's art you should look at some of her paintings because this wonderful novel feels just like her surrealist paintings!

Mrs. Caliban by Rachel Ingalls: This novella tells the story of a love affair between a depressed suburban housewife and an amphibian creature who escaped a scientific research center. It might sound like a quirky fiction story but it actually deals with the most mundane and banal aspects of life and human relationships. Brilliantly written; neat and precise prose, wonderful storytelling. The author knew what she was doing and not a single word she wrote was wasted.

The Borrowers by Mary Norton: Delicately written little adventure about tiny people who live in the secret places of houses. I am enamored (obsessed!!) with miniatures—dollhouses, dioramas, fairies—so imagine how dear this book is to me.

Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn: The murders of two girls bring reporter Camille Preaker back to her hometown. As she works to uncover the truth about those crimes, Camille finds herself forced to unravel the psychological puzzle of her own past. Very entertaining read. It has best seller written all over it (which might not be the biggest compliment lol but i mean for this genre so it is a compliment).

Rage by Sergio Bizzio: Claustrophobic, anxiety inducing, fast-paced psychological thriller that made me think of Bong Joon-ho's Parasite the whole 4 hours it took me to read it. I read it in it's original language, Spanish, and i particularly loved the dialogue; its idiosyncrasies and authenticity (tqm Argentina!)

High Fidelity by Nick Hornby: Rob, an obsessive music fan, reminisces his top five worst break ups to understand his most recent heartbreak. He is a very arrogant and cynical guy who defines his entire life through records, and because he is constantly interacting with music that almost exclusively deals with love—and a very idealistic version of it—he finds himself unsatisfied with the way his life has turned out.

[marxist-amy-rose]

I feel like to some people, SatAM is just to Sonic what the Super Mario Bros. Super Show! was to Mario, when it's not the case at all! SMBSS is just one of many branches of Mario Content, whereas SatAM was a franchise defining event, a turning point in history, it sealed Sonic's fate. Forces would not have happened without SatAM, or Archie, and no Forces or Archie, no IDW! You get what I mean? SatAM had more of an impact than X did, fight me on this, I will kill us both on this hill. Not to say that SatAM is better than X, just that, X's mark on the franchise was soft and shallow compared to SatAM's, SatAM's mark is downright problematic even.

What's gettin' me all uppity about it now? Well, again, I feel like people treat SatAM like the Sonic Bros. Super Show (when far more accurately, AoStH would be the Sonic Bros. Super Show), like it's a footnote, a side dish, and not as important as it really is to the public perception of the franchise and how Sega tries to play catch up with that perception, it's one of the earliest parts of Sonic's seemingly forever identity crisis. You know whenever someone says Sonic is a franchise about freedom and fighting oppression? You can thank SatAM for that. When you break it down, that kind of thing comes from SatAM. Sure, SatAM also started a trend of Sonic associating with monarch's, but no one really cares about that except me, so whatever. SatAM was the first thing people got pissed at for "All of Sonic's friends" and complaining about a "bloated cast", Sonally and Sonamy was the first shipping war, SatAM was the first Sonic Cartoon, the first split in Canon's, it was the first! It was responsible for Archie and all Archie became, and what eventually became IDW, and was so shamelessly copied but also ignored and disrespected by Forces. There isn't an equivalent, such an oddity of the franchise yet so impactful at the same time, even because of its status as an oddity, it is something special to Sonic!

(extended extra analysis under cut)

I kinda find Japanese purists in the Sonic Fandom, especially the young ones, obnoxious. Like, they're this odd brand of Sonic purists, not on a gameplay level or visual design level but on a conceptual level, Sonic is a flawless concept that represents freedom and not really a character with problems, the real Sonic plots in games are the original Japanese ones, those types. It's not a moral judgement, I don't even think they're wrong, I just think that it's ignorant. Sega was founded by an American, Sonic was made to appeal to juvenile Americans, he's Santa Clause Bill Clinton Michael Jackson Mickey Mouse. I'm just a Doylist about these things. What Sonic is to me is a moving conversation between America and Japan, and when you cut out one side of it you miss the whole thing. You can't cherry pick what is and isn't "really Sonic", it's ALL Sonic, that's the conundrum, that's the metanarrative. Sonic isn't "about" anything, especially not when you remove it from its creators and inspirations, and from the very earliest days, those creators were also USAmericans. Sonic 2 and Sonic CD, Sonic CD US Soundtrack and Sonic CD JP Soundtrack, Sonic Story (English Translation) and Sonic Story (Original Japanese), Sonic Comics and Sonic Manga, SatAM and OVA, etc. Sonic was never written to be about Japanese-American, dialectics lets say, but when you look at its fanbase and look at its creators and look at its history, that is what makes Sonic, that's the historical push and pull that has created Sonic, not as a singular forever idea like Mario, but as a moving living historical entity, even with its own goddamn looping lifecycle!

Hell, now with Classic Sonic and Modern Sonic, you can say Sonic is just dialectical at its heart as well as in its history. Then with Knuckles, Shadow, Metal Sonic, hell even Tails you could say. Sonic was made as, literally an antithesis to Mario, or an equivalent, a rival, whatever, Blue Oni Red Oni. The dichotomy, the dialectics are just in the blood and soul of what this franchise is on a larger level.

[caffeine-clouds]

What Your Favourite Sonic Ship Says About You! (Part 1)

(Sonamy, Sonadow, Sonally) FULL DISCLAIMER: Shipping is a hot topic of debate, but this post is lighthearted fun! I'm a multi-shipper, I love most of these ships - and I can see why some people like the dynamics that I might not. This is not a bashing post, this is fun time. So, without further ado- Sonamy

You appreciate the simpler things in life. You decided to ship the protagonist with the main girl character just like 90% of all media writers, it's just what you're comfortable with. In terms of fanfiction tropes, do you happen to enjoy childhood sweethearts, meet-cutes, soulmates - that type of thing? I just had a feeling... Either way, you're just here for the cute vibes and the pining - and who can blame you? You probably really liked the fact that when you first came across the ship that it was the girl of the pair being the one so forward with her romantic feelings. But as time has gone on - you're either one of those people that really miss that side of Amy, or you're one of those that are so dang grateful they've toned her down. Either way, it's safe to say that this is one of the most vanilla of Sonic ships - and that's not an insult, vanilla is a good ice cream flavour. But no one is really going to fight you on your opinion other than the 5% of remaining toxic Sonally shippers, and those people that are somehow still living in the Sonic Heroes era. Sonadow

You saw that Sonic and Shadow's rivalry has been going on for far longer than 7 years, so it must be gay - and honestly, I can't fault your logic. You're a sucker for two disasters who can't express their feelings, and you have just determined that fighting is simply their love language. Even with Shadow's limited screen time in Prime, you suck every single dang crumb you're given like a vacuum. And by the way, you definitely have an Ao3 account - don't try and hide it. We already know you're a sucker for enemies/rivals to lovers... and I'd also wager you enjoy just-one-bed. Also you like that thing where characters constantly call each other by a nickname, and only end up calling them by their actual name during a confession scene or when one of the characters is seriously injured. I dunno, just had a hunch you'd like that sort of thing. You are debating between two sides of yourself - part of you wants Shadow's old characterization back where he was a more in-depth character and showed Sonic more respect, but part of you also loves how so damn obsessive Shadow is in modern games over Sonic and how much he wants to fight him - because that at least implies that Sonic is on Shadow's mind literally most of the time. But when all is said and done, this is vanilla when it comes to gay ships in the Sonic community. It's too damn easy, it's why it's the most popular Sonic ship on Tumblr. This ship was made for the LGBTQ+ community. Sonally

Opposites attract is your go-to, and it's been tried and tested - the formula works, I see it. You strike me as the person who really cares about canon material, and you tend to steer away from a lot of fanon. I also have a strong feeling you're a Sonic fan that's on the older side, back when SatAM and Archie were at their peak and considerably more popular. It's a ship with all the things you need to be happy - the characters have a deep, long-lasting bond, it's a sweet ship, and the two have constrasting personalities - so it doesn't get stale for you. You're probably into similar tropes as the Sonamy shippers - but you enjoy more drama and spice to your fanfics, and you won't shy away from angst - Archie loved its angst, I know you enjoyed that shit. You're either content with all the Sonally content you've gotten over the years, and will occassionally look at fanarts. Or you're one of those people who will not let the Archie comics go, you are still in denial - you are begging for Sally's return into the series and you're hoping now that Ian Flynn is writing for the games, that your dreams might just become a reality.

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

okay legit question. and i'm eager to have this discussion. can you help me understand why you think that izzy scene was comedic? if it's purely based on those pathetic whimpers he made at the end of the scene, i'm honestly not convinced. god knows i've made pathetic noises like that when i've been genuinely upset about something. yeah that shit's awkward but isn't dismissing the noise as comedic sort of relying in the expectation that drama should be pretty?

and this ask wasn't meant to sound dismissive of your opinion btw, or defensive of izzy. (i love that weird and evil little freak for being a weird and evil little freak and thats all.) i'm just confused as to how that scene could be read that way.

Ok so lets start off with that in season 1 Izzy is not granted like even a shred of sympathy in any similar situation. We've seen this man cry before and when it happened Ed and Stede were making sex noises in the background and there was a jaunty little tune over it. Generally when writers and directors want us to be sympathetic to a character they build an emotional connection to that character and they just haven't done that for Izzy.

But moving onto the scene itself: This is the extended joke set up in season one of the disconnect of treating a pirate ship like workplace with HR. They're having like an intervention for Izzy and using the words "unhealthy relationship" and "toxic" to talk about toe chopping, which is excellent. I know the internet vernacular has kind of made these the go to words but you get how "toxic relationship unhealthy boundary setting" is not generally how television characters talk about stuff like this. Jim and Frenchie are out here using modern therapy words.

Then Archie starts talking about how much Rhino Horn Ed does which is incredible. they could have said he's doing weed, they could have said he's doing opium, they could have said he's doing a more modern drug, ofmd doesn't shy away from that, but instead they went with the most esoteric ye olde Viagra pull ever. Ed's doing fucking RHINO HORN???? Superb.

Then there's the the fact that Izzy clearly hates every second of it. Like these teddy bear capybara friend shaped men (Fang and Frenchie) are just like "hey you ok bro?" to a guy who HATES expressing any emotions so much that he spend like a whole season trying to stop Ed from doing it. Like you can feel how bad he wants to throw himself overboard from embarrassment

Then there's Fang. Dionysus an Emmy for that man. He pats Izzy on the shoulder and then Izzy pushes him away with the weakest I'm fine in history and then he goes in and gives him a hug from behind which is very much reminicent of like a hold a medical professional would use to subdue someone who is a danger to themselves or others without harming them. And then he just starts rocking him

And then there's the actual breakdown itself. I want to preface this with that I understand that in real life you might make some weird noises during a breakdown. But this is not real life. Usually when actors have breakdowns on stage or tv they have to decide what choices they're going to make. You can do a pretty cry, you can go overdramatic and comedic, you can make the audience uncomfortable in a veriety of ways. What Con has chosen here is air being let out of a balloon, He snorts like a pig, he whimpers. You know when you blow up a balloon and you pull the valve tight and it makes a screaming sound. His choice to heem heem whimper is histerical. And then he makes the sound and fang gives out a soft "am I crushing you" as if Fang thinks he's making the noise because of physical discomfort.

and then like everyone else's reactions. They're all so uncomfortable. Fang is like It's all right it's all right while Jim looks to Archie like "are you seeing this?" and Archie looks back and forth between them and then Frenchie is doing this with his face

and then there's the music. My god the music is just the sappiest shit ever over this??? like the whole thing is hillarious. Emmys for all of them

Edit: I forgot the funniest part. This whole thing is this Tweet

[bougiebutchbinch]

o ok i just asked bc i always thought ed torturing the crew and traumatizing the crew was more emotional/psychological than physical. like the overworking the crew and running them ragged was sort of a joke abt toxic workplace environments where the joke is that instead of a modern office job their toxic workplace is Being Pirates. like the whole joke abt the first episode where stede is like "piracy is a culture of abuse but what if it weren't like that" and trying to encourage his staff to take care of their mental health, i thought the first episode of s2 was what piracy usually looks like on every other pirate ship that isn't stede's and that's why archie (who never met stede) thinks everything is normal. like the joke to me was that ed was making his employees work overtime for no paycheck and only compensating them with a pizza party, only instead of overtime its 80+ raids in a row and instead of no paycheck it's telling the crew to throw all the treasure overboard and instead of a pizza party it's wedding cake and drugs. and obviously all of this sucks and ed is a terrible boss but during the kraken era he's clearly not worse than ur average pirate captain or else the crew would've mutinied, this crew tried to mutiny against stede and izzy rlly quickly like they’re not gonna put up with a uniquely shitty boss. not that that makes ed's shitty captaining ok but it explains why archie thinks everything is normal and why the rest of the crew is miserable but still doesn't try to like, do anything about it.

and then w making archie and jim fight to the death. i mean i guess that's physical but i thought the real source of trauma there was more on the emotional turmoil of making this new couple fight each other vs the physical violence of just. fighting and getting hurt, which they do every day as part of their job anyway. and then ESPECIALLY i thought the biggest part of the psychological torture is the fact that ed did all of this only bc he wanted them to kill him and then they did, which the show is pretty explicit about. like he wasn't hurting ppl be he was just lashing out angrily, he was hurting them specifically so they would hurt him back. obviously again this does not make any of ed's actions ok but it's a much more complicated motivation i think.

like ig u can read it as "the crew was traumatized be ed was so scary and violent towards them" but i think it's way more interesting to focus on how the crew was scrubbing out an invisible bloodstain like they were lady macbeth. like there's obviously a lot of guilt there! which is crazy be the crew aren't ppl who are usually guilty abt killing pp|-they're pirates, for one, and then jim was rlly proud of killing alfeo. so i always thought abt it like, the guilt of when someone u know commits suicide and ur wondering if there's anything u could've done, but compounded be the crew are the tool ed used to commit suicide. like ed did not leave them a choice and they were 100% justified in killing him in self-defense but clearly they have very complicated feelings abt it or else they wouldn't be so focused on scrubbing out ed's blood from the deck. and they're also justified in their anger towards him be they didn't deserve this, they were all looking forward to doing a talent show w him and then suddenly he snapped and they didn't know why and he overworked them for months and steered them into a storm and put them in a situation where they had no choice but to kill him in self defense.

sorry i didn’t mean to leave this huge rant lol i just rlly love talking abt the crew’s trauma and how bad ed messed them up lol. when u mentioned physical torture i thought maybe there was something i missed and like i guess the physical torture is there, but i don’t think it’s really portrayed as anything more physically violent than what other pirate captains do (like making them eat live crabs) which again does not make it ok but it does explain why archie’s cool with it and nobody tries to mutiny. and like the really dark part of the kraken era to me is in the emotional and psychological torture of ed trying to make the crew kill him. like that's way more fucked up than any of the physical violence ed put them through

This is a very interesting theory!

With that being said, we're splitting hairs. Torture is torture. Psychological, emotional and physical elements overlap. I'm not sure whether arguing that we should focus on the psychological and emotional elements has any worth, when the physical elements are inherently woven into that?

Depriving someone of sleep and forcing them into a constant state of hypervigilance, as well as physically threatening to kill them and making them fight each other to the death.... the lines between psychological and physical torture are blurred, but I really don't think they matter all that much? There is a psychological, emotional, and physical element to all of these actions that Ed took against his crew? I'm not quite sure what you think the worth is in these specific categorisations.

Also, while I like your interpretation of the crew 'scrubbing out an invisible bloodstain like they were lady macbeth' (and absolutely think there's some merit to it!) I also think you need some nuance in there.

Focusing wholly on that kinda..... ignores the fact that they clearly were shown to be traumatised? Like that's not just my interpretation? That's canon! We see their hypervigilance and freaking out over tiny things - even if it's played for laughs. We see the way they cling together and form a tight-knit little group, and if we include Lucius in this, they struggle to reintegrate with 'Stede's' crew specifically because of the trauma that Ed caused them.

As for Ed 'just acting like a normal pirate captain'... Hm. There are some definite issues in your interpretation, as far as I see it.

Fang's reaction acts as a litmus test there. Ed previously threatened Fang with knives for fun and forced him to kill his dog. But Fang's constant crying and horror at Ed's actions during the Kraken era really suggests to me that during this time frame, he went far beyond the 'norm'?

If 'the joke is that instead of a modern office job their toxic workplace is Being Pirates', then why, in S1 was Izzy so upset about the possibility of Ed getting the lot of them killed? When we meet them again in S2, the majority of the crew have been killed, specifically because of Ed's actions, including Ivan. If this was 'the norm', piracy would be laughably inefficient to the point of being entirely non-functional! This, plus Izzy's earlier reaction to the threat of Ed getting all of them killed shows this really isn't 'normal' in my opinion.

Again, I think it really helps to divide this argument into 'are we looking at the characters as characters, or are we looking at them as people?' I can see that the writers introduced Archie and her horrific traumas with other captains, and therefore her acceptance of Ed, to try and downplay his fun atrocities. But I don't think that was enough. I just don't think it worked as well as they wanted it to! If it was enough for you, that's great, but I think there are enough discrepancies between the hints we get of how Ed acted pre-S1 and how he acted in S2 that I just don't see your vision here, sorry.

A lot of the arguing on this subject comes down to 'Izzy was the real bad guy!' 'no, Ed was the real bad guy!' and I'm glad you're not dipping your toes in that. But I will say, just to nip any of this in the bud, as I've seen this argument play out way too many times.... If people are going to say that everything Ed does was within the bounds of 'normal' piracy, and thus Not A Big Deal, the same goes for how Izzy spoke to Ed during S1! You can't damn one and praise the other!

With all of that being said.... I freaking love your entire thought process about the 'Lady Macbeth' thing. Being used as a tool in someone else's suicide is fucking horrific, psychologically speaking - especially when it was someone you genuinely liked, before he started in on the abuse! There's such a complex clash there between feeling genuine pity and empathy for someone who's going through a horrific time, and rightful hurt and anger that they would force you to be the one to kill them. I would love to see more fics that dig into that aspect of the crew's relationship with Ed!