#my beliefs give me faith that that will happen

[cyncerity]

me, thinking about this all day a few days ago: man, i wish i was better at drawing Pig Techno, he loved fanart like that

Techno, seeing the opportunity to endorse his brand and taking it:

mans wants to make sure i know how to draw him hsjskskshsj

i’ll keep this brief, but i’m a firm believer that people can send signs to you after they die, and no one can convince me that this wasn’t him :,)

also i think that Techno really wanted me to know it was him cause minutes after these clouds dissipated the sky and clouds turned PINK and the sun turned RED

IM NOT KIDDING-

blood for the blood god ❤️

i miss you, you crazy nerdy pig man, but i’m doing better knowing you’re having a great time somewhere messing with me and countless others i’m sure, and you’re not in pain anymore.

Technoblade never dies!!! 👑🐷💖

[loko4koko]

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ Gojo Satoru x f!reader ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

100 FOLLOWER MILESTONE CELEBRATION ✰

>fanart_credit: _3aem (via_twitter)

MDNI 18+

>word_count: 7293

>contents: slight crack (it’s a gojo fic what do u expect), established relationship, fake engagements, excessive use of “fiancé/fiancée”, satoru is DOWN BAD like ultra simp 3000 levels, kiiinda rich boy!gojo but like barely, gojo calls you “angel” and baby” a lot, cunnilingus, kinda feral!gojo too, multiple orgasms (f!receiving), multiple positions, explicit p in v, rough(ish) sex, creampie, gojo being a lil slut for you, itty bitty dacryphilia (if you squint mad hard)

there’s a standoff happening in your kitchen. a staring contest of sorts. the tension in the air is palpable, so thick you could taste it if you stuck out your tongue. your opponent is a worthy contender, giving just as good as it gets. your nose twitches with the intensity of it, eyes narrowed as you keep your gaze firm, focused.

your adversary in this battle? a red, velvet ring box.

god, it’s like it’s taunting you with it’s delicate heart shape. smug little box, just sitting on the dining table unopened. you’re not sure how long you’ve been caught in the orbit of this suspicious item, but it must’ve been quite a while, according to your boyfriend.

“babeee, i’ve been calling you! what’re you doing?” satoru appears from the direction of your bedroom, frown on his face from his belief that you’re purposely ignoring him. he slips behind you, arms around your torso as he leaves a kiss on the top of your head.

“oh,” he laughs as he fixes his eyes on what has you so engrossed, “it’s not what you think.”

this is what gets your attention, turning your head so your gaze is no longer on the little box, but on satoru instead. “what, you proposing to your other girlfriend or something?” you pout. he laughs again, annoyingly louder this time.

“baby, i’m not proposing to anybody yet. and you know i don’t have another girlfriend. it took me 3 years to get you to say yes to one date, you think i’m pulling that off again? thanks for putting faith into my game, though.” you can’t help but to roll your eyes in jest, turning in the man’s arms to wrap yourself around him.

“yeah, yeah, whatever. so…what is it then?”

“it’s a ring.”

“i thought you said you weren’t proposing…”

“okay well, technically, i am. but listen! i saw online some guy and his girlfriend went to different restaurants with a fake ring and when he ‘proposed’ to her, they gave them free food and desserts! so. we’re doing that.”

you pull yourself from satoru’s grasp, staring up at him blankly. he gives you a goofy smile in return, bringing a hand up to boop your nose when you remain silent.

“satoru….really? doing this just so you can get free chocolate lava cakes and ice cream? i’m definitely deleting tiktok from your phone, damn app gives you way too many ideas.” and there he goes frowning again, pretty pink lips downturned so dramatically.

“baby, no…i’m doing this so that WE can get free chocolate lava cakes and ice cream. what kind of selfish, evil man do you take me for? … and you’re not deleting my tiktok! how else am i going to send nanami videos he claims to not watch but always knows about when i ask him?”

a sigh leaves you as you shake your head, truly experiencing defeat. you, and everyone else that had ever met him for that matter, knew that there was no changing satoru’s mind when the words “free” and “dessert” were involved. he’d eat himself into a goddamn diabetic coma if you let him get away with it.

satoru enacts his master plan the next night, surprising you with a stunning new dress and a note that says to “look super sexy and marriageable (where the hell had he even learned that word?) as usual” left on your bed. you try your best to comply with his wishes, getting your makeup and hair as perfect as you can before slipping the very revealing dress on. you realize something rather odd while you doll yourself up; satoru hasn’t come home to get himself ready. it was almost 6pm, the time designated by him in his little note, and you were practically ready aside from some jewelry and shoes. you couldn’t imagine that he would make you wait while he showered and dressed, so you were a little bit confused, but you decide to brush it off while you pick between solid gold hoops and diamond-encrusted dangles, both courtesy of the man in question.

when 6:04pm rolls around, and your fancy yves saint laurent heels are wrapped around your feet, the front door opens. you look up from your seat at the kitchen island with a wine glass in hand, and, in the most cliché way possible, your breath is stolen right out of your lungs. satoru was always stupidly beautiful, just so gorgeous that it made you sick, but now? he looked even more alluring than usual. those inhumanly blue eyes were hidden behind his typical shades, masterfully tailored suit adorning his lanky form like it was painted on. his deep red button up, the same color as your cocktail dress, was unbuttoned for the first three (because he was a slut.) and to top it all off, he was wearing that same award winning smile that he’d dazzled you with so many years ago. if he wasn’t so set on his goddamn desserts, you’d bend over and spread your thighs for him right there on the counter.

“holy fuck,” is the first thing he says to you, grip on a bouquet of what looks like dark red carnations and burgundy roses tightening as he takes you in. he takes off his glasses as he draws in closer, pure reverence in his eyes the whole time. “angel, you look…you look fucking edible. my god. what a woman.” you’re not new to satoru’s comments and compliments, far from it, but tonight, they were hitting a little different, for lack of a better term. maybe it was the look in his eyes, some kind of compound of love and burning desire, but something else, too. something almost…determined, but you don’t know what he’d be determined to do other than put on a good show.

“so, eat me then,” you tease, though the heat in your cheeks and your eyes not meeting his gives away how flustered he’s got you. he’s still looking you over, scrutinizing every pretty inch of you with an overwhelming intensity before his steely gaze levels to yours.

“mm, tempting, but it’ll have to wait; we have to go get engaged first. these,” he holds the flowers out to you, “are yours, my arrestingly beautiful queen.” you can’t help but to laugh at his ultra-corny pet names, but they warm your heart nonetheless, rising from your stool to find a vase to fill with water.

“where were you, anyway? you show up all dressed to the nines on me out of nowhere. what, did you get ready in the car or something?” you ask, back to the white-haired man while you dig around in a cabinet.

“suguru helped me out, kept my suit and let me shower at his place..” he says, almost distantly. you can’t see it, but satoru is watching you, worshipping you with his eyes as you flit around the kitchen in your heels and your dress and your oh so seductive aura. he’s never seen anything or anyone be more mesmerizing in his life, and he knows he never will.

arriving at the first restaurant of the three satoru had planned has your nerves alighting. what if they knew you were faking it? god, how disgraceful that would be—caught in your goober of a boyfriend’s silly scheme would have you too embarrassed to show your face in public for at least two months. but then he smiles at you from the driver seat- a genuine one that eases your anxieties and soothes your concerns, one so brilliant that it instills you with the necessary confidence to go commit…whatever form of fraud this whole thing is. you give him one in return, reaching out to cup his cheek before you’re leaning in to press a gentle kiss to his lips. you can feel him smile even wider when you do.

“so, how much do you want me to sell this? ‘cause, if i cry now, it might not be so believable at the next place.” satoru’s pushing in your chair when you speak, smoothing his hands down your shoulders before giving you a squeeze. he takes his own seat, flipping the menu open to browse through the beverage list.

“best as you can with no tears. gotta save those for the last one,” he tilts his glasses down to send you a wink, and, for the millionth time within your relationship, you’re light-heartedly rolling your eyes at him. “you got it, baby. but! if you don’t share whatever disgustingly sweet, sugar-stuffed, chocolate-drizzled, candy-coated bullshit you ask for, it’s gonna be your pretty little ass.” he laughs at your threat and throws his hands up in resignation. you might be smiling when you say it, but you surely aren’t joking, and he knows it.

you both decide to keep dinner small and light, knowing you’re going to gorge yourselves on whatever insulin-raising dishes your dear boyfriend chooses to indulge in. it’s not long after you put your fork down when he gives you ‘the look.’ you have to use all of your willpower not to smile, woosah-ing yourself into the role of an unsuspecting girlfriend about to be proposed to. you paint a look of surprise on your face when he gets down on one knee, giving you a charming little speech about how he’d “wanted to do this for so, so long” and how he “could never love another the way he loves you, never want to. so please baby, will you marry me?” it’s actually rather romantic, makes you wonder how close it all is to his true feelings for you.

you and satoru hardly ever explicitly talked about marriage, but he did always talk about how he wanted to be with you forever (or rather, that he’d jump off a bridge if you ever broke up with him, but that wasn’t as eloquent.) he’d mention plans of a big house he wanted to put you in, so he could come home to you and your warm embrace every day until he was old and wrinkly beside you. so, maybe not an outright “hey, we’re getting married some day,” but it was most definitely implied.

at the end of satoru’s little scripted scene, he pulls out that same heart-shaped ring box from the table, opening it up to showcase a square cut diamond, one you’re sure must be a piece of costume jewelry for the occasion. you gasp, climbing out of your seat to throw your arms around him with a “yes! yes, i’ll marry you!” he picks you up, standing back up to his full height as he delicately sways you back and forth. you share a kiss, one you let a few secret giggles into, before you part, allowing your boyfriend the pleasure of sliding the ring onto your finger. the patrons of the restaurant that’d been watching the spectacle all clap at what they believe to be a genuine display of affection, including your waiter from his station near the kitchen. it’s a lot of attention, but being with someone that looks like (and acts like, and is) satoru means you’re relatively used to stares and whispers. he gives you one more sloppy smooch before he’s helping you back into your seat, giving a bow of thanks to the other customers before he’s sitting, too.

when the waiter comes back to offer up your grand prize, with eyes dampened from your well-acted performance, satoru keeps it simple and orders a non-nauseating plate of assorted mochi ice cream. and when it comes to the table, he plucks one of the cold, sweet little treats in between his long fingertips and reaches his equally lengthy arm across the table to feed it to you with not a lick of selfishness. fuck the dessert, he’d share the entire moon with you if it was in his possession.

“babe, we fucking killed that. that lady? in the black blouse? she was crying, like, actually crying! i almost feel bad, but that mochi was to die for, so i’d say it was a worthy crime.” you jabber excitedly on your walk back to the car, hand in hand with your stage fiancé. he’s staring down at you as you prattle on, knows he should be watching where he’s going but fuck, you’re so stunning and you go along with his admittedly very childish desires for free sweets and yeah, he really is so whipped, it’s not even funny. he’d never deny it, either—the man who carries multiple pictures of you in his wallet and as his phone background, the man who gives you massages and shares from his candy stash when you’re on your period, the one who can’t get mad at you when you fall asleep on him during a movie he really wanted to see? there’d be an ice-cold day in hell before that man—the only gojo satoru—ever denies being hopelessly, foolishly, irrevocably in love with you.

the second restaurant that you and satoru pull your scheme on is a tad bit more upscale than the first—not to say the first eatery wasn’t upscale, would never be the case with your luxury loving boyfriend—and you absorb your surroundings from your place on the man’s arm while he checks your reservation in with the maître d. for this place, as fancy as it is, you think you’ll tone down the theatrics, keep it a little classier this time around. you don’t want to embarrass yourself or satoru with some overly acted performance that screamed fake. the suited man behind the counter leads you to a table, not smack-dab in the middle of the dining area but not very secluded either, something perfect for the exhibition you were going to put on.

“you know, you’re setting me up for some very high expectations, ‘toru,” you speak from behind your wine glass, eyes on what would be his if it weren’t for the glasses he still wears. he looks up from his menu, head tilted inquisitively.

“is that so?”

“mhm. that ring you got looks nice, but you’ve spoiled me. i’m gonna need one way bigger now. and,” you pause, taking another swig from your glass, “you’ll have to really surprise me. i mean, this restaurant is really nice, but if you keep this up, we’re gonna run out of fancy restaurants for you to actually propose to me in. there’re only so many, y’know.” your tone is coated in sarcasm, but satoru doesn’t laugh. instead, he smirks, closing his menu and placing it to the side.

“don’t worry your pretty little head about that, sweet girl. you’ll be very surprised when it happens.”

the meal is delicious, as expected, and your plates are cleared soon after. satoru’s laughing at a story you have about your neighbor’s adorable little kitty cat that keeps trying to sneak into your apartment while he pours you another glass of an unnecessarily expensive wine he insisted on.

“are you ready?” he asks when you finish, and you give him a short nod, quick to prepare yourself again for the false astonishment you have to give and the onslaught of eyes that were soon to be on the two of you.

he reaches across the table to take your left hand in his, eyes peering up at you over his glasses when he leans down to press his lips against your ring finger.

“i love you,” he murmurs before he’s up and out of his seat. he approaches your side of the table but he doesn’t do his part of getting down on one knee yet, opting instead to cup your cheek with a hold so gentle you’d assume he thought you were made of glass.

“i mean it, i really do love you more than anything in this world.” you don’t have time to respond to the declaration before he’s descending to his knee, taking your hand yet again as he gives you another speech. this one is different than the last, but just as full of genuine love.

“you make my days worth living, baby. you make the sun look like a streetlight in comparison to how much you light up my life. you’re so funny, so smart, so generous, and you put up with the…less than favorable parts of my personality with very minimal complaints.” he says that last part with a little bit of disdain and it has you giggling in a way no one else can bring out of you, despite your slightly glossy eyes. “my perfect girl, will you marry me?”

and there it is, the ring box you’d been waiting to see since you stepped into this establishment full of onlookers. he opens the box and slides the ring onto your finger before he even gets your verbal answer, but it doesn’t matter because you’re nodding and smiling like a damn idiot, as if it’s real. you try not to dwell on that thought for long.

“of course i’ll marry you, satoru.” he carefully pulls you up out of your chair and cups your face again, this time with both hands, lips against yours in a kiss much more serious than the last time you did this. there’s more applause following suit, but you can’t pay attention to anyone but satoru, who’s kissing you so deeply that the restaurant could be burning to a crisp and you would be none the wiser. when you part, he’s grinning, a little bit from the wine buzz and a lot from the adrenaline of proposing to his gorgeous girlfriend, staged as it was.

your waitress is quick to congratulate you both, and when she mentions the one thing that satoru came here for—that goddamned free dessert—he lets you choose. but you’re so generous, his sweet little sweetheart, just like he said in his speech, and you pick something sugar-stuffed, and chocolate drizzled, and so fucking satoru that it makes your teeth ache. you’re always, always, thinking about him, and he loves you all the more for it.

when you get to the last restaurant/soon-to-be victim of theft of services, you’re feeling very practiced in the art of deception. the tears you were able to evoke out of the unknowing guests, and the ones satoru almost pulled out of you had you unwaveringly confident in both your own and satoru’s level of skill as thespians this time around.

this place is a far cry from the previous two and you can tell before you even step foot inside, the architectural marvel of a building radiating the energy of one of those “sorry, we’re booked 3 years in advance” kind of places. you have no doubt that satoru could get in anywhere if he wanted to, though- the man was quick to offer bribes well into the range of some people’s entire salaries. if he wanted something, he was unrelenting, tenacious even—traits you admired greatly about him.

the moment you step inside, you start to feel a little swell of anxiety. this was..intense. the lighting was much more moody, with floor to ceiling windows giving the diners a view of a beautiful garden, lush with greenery. you and satoru had dined well before, but this was something entirely different. he leads you to the reception desk where another maître d, not dissimilar to the one before, greets you with an air of extreme professionalism. satoru gives the man his name, and you’re left a little confused when his eyes widen in what you think is surprise. he gives your boyfriend a quick nod before he dashes off, and you try not to focus too much on how expensive this place must be or why satoru would come here of all places for a free dessert, but it’s hard not to. the wall behind the reception desk is practically covered in plaques of awards, the words “michelin star” and “winner of..” plastered on most of them. you know those aren’t easily earned, so you try to think less about the exorbitant cost you know your boyfriend is paying, instead doing your best to enjoy this probably once-in-a-lifetime dining experience.

the man from before returns, with another more sharply dressed man, who grins wide when he sees satoru and yourself. he shakes your man’s hand firmly, giving a nod of his head in the direction of the dining area. the restaurant is gorgeous, past that really, but a little under-populated for satoru’s plan to have it’s most effectiveness. besides, what’s the point of a fake proposal if no one is gonna see it?

you mention your previous thoughts to satoru once you’re seated, but he just gives you a smile and says “don’t worry about anything other than enjoying yourself.”

so you don’t. you reminisce on funny, and sometimes embarrassing stories about your past with satoru—sharing laughter, and food you can’t fucking pronounce, and glasses of ridiculously high-priced alcohol.

“you’re the most wonderful woman in the world, angel,” he muses some time down the line, “thank you. i don’t fucking deserve you.” his words have you putting your glass down, reaching across the table to mirror his earlier actions by taking his hand, with your face set into a frown.

“i don’t like it when you say things like that, satoru. you do deserve me..because i say you do. you’re not- you’re not hard to love, satoru; it’s actually very, very easy. and i love loving you, and i’m gonna keep doing it every fucking day that you’ll have me. okay? so none of that,” you say, squeezing his much larger hand in your own.

“what if i wanted to have you forever?” he asks, eyes still hidden behind those increasingly unnecessary glasses. the restaurant is far more dimly lit than the first two, but the urge to complain comes only from how much you miss looking into those dazzling blue pools.

“well, i’d give you forever and then some. you’re not getting rid of me, ‘toru,” you grin, taking the stem of your glass between the fingers of your free hand and lifting it to your lips. satoru follows the movement behind his shades, watches how the delicate line of your throat bobs with your swallowing with a sort of reverie that is usually described in religious texts. he’d pray for you, pray to you, anything. he’d learn how to sculpt just so your beauty could be immortalized for all of eternity.

satoru says your name and you hum, quick to swallow down the rest of your sake before giving him a sweet smile with your eyebrows raised.

“i hope you meant what you said—about forever.” you’re about to ask him what his foreboding words mean but you’re interrupted by none other than satoru himself, rising from his seat for the third and final time this evening to bring himself down to one knee. you’re about to laugh and quietly chide him for not giving you time to prepare for the show when you hear the sound of a piano, looking over your shoulder to see a man sitting at the once unmanned instrument. you turn further still and see that all of the staff has crowded around the edges of the room, all holding intricately crafted bouquets of..dark red carnations and burgundy roses, much like the one he’d given you, both granting you space but still wanting to watch the grand gesture that your boyfriend prepared.

“satoru, what’s….did you call ahead or something? this is…kind of a lot for a dessert i could make you at home..” he smiles and shakes his head at your endearing ignorance to the situation, reaching up to pull his glasses off for the first time all night. those eyes that you missed so much, they were rimmed with a faint redness. you couldn’t help but act on your instincts, reaching out to cup his face in your careful—caring—hands. you don’t get the chance to ask him what has him tearing up so much before he starts, a speech entirely new leaving his lips.

“if you think that loving me is easy, then loving you is child’s play. loving you is…one of the greatest gifts that i have ever or could ever be granted. you don’t always see it, and i like it that way, but sometimes—a lot of times—i look at you like you created the heavens and the earth. you are the heavens and the earth to me. you’re everything to me. your laugh alone could cure me of any ails. i don’t know what i did to make such a beautiful, loving, gentle, smart, hilarious, talented woman fall in love with my stupid ass, but fuck, baby, i thank the universe every day for you. you give me purpose. you give me strength. you give me the want to continue, when it feels like there’s no fight left in me.”

your eyes shimmer with unshed tears, lips parted in genuine shock that you hadn’t expected to feel tonight. you spare another glance at the staff before bringing your gaze back to satoru, voice caught in your throat and tongue heavy in your mouth.

“satoru, if- if you’re playing with me..if you’re doing this for your damn dessert, i-“

“no, baby, this- this is real. you are…the most exceptional person i know. you love me in a way that i didn’t know was possible before you came into my life. i’m so goddamn unworthy of you, but you chose me, and i swear, that for the rest of my life—the rest of our life—i’ll never let you down. please, angel. please make me the most blessed man on the planet and marry me?”

satoru reaches into the pocket of his suit pants as you stare in amazement, mascara tears fully running down your cheeks now. the ring box in his grasp is much different than the one from your faux-engagements—it’s black, shaped like an oval with silver ornamental designs around the perimeter. and when he opens it, your lip begins to quiver.

the ring is something so uniquely satoru, a thin silver band that splits into multiple vine-like channels, with little diamonds attached for the appearance of flowers. they meet at the top where the stone resides, and fuck, it’s big. it’s aquamarine, with several little prongs holding it’s marquise shape in place. it must’ve cost a fortune, and you can’t help but marvel at it as satoru takes your hand in his own again, lips against your ring finger one last time before he’s slipping the delicate piece of jewelry onto your finger.

“i need you to say it, angel. say you’ll marry me,” he pleads, blue eyes shining in the dimly lit space. you can’t hold back the sob that leaves you, nodding vigorously as you caress his face.

“yes, ‘toru, i’ll marry you.” you say through the tears, pressing your salt-covered lips to his. there’s applause behind you, just like the other “engagements,” but this time, you don’t need them there. you’d have said yes to him if it was 3 in the morning and you were half asleep, you’d have said it in the car on the way to the grocery store. you’d say yes to him anywhere, at any time.

true to satoru’s word, he doesn’t bother with the free dessert this time around. he’s too busy thinking about going home and getting a taste of his fiancée to bother with some fancy piece of cake. and he almost doesn’t make it home, pressing you up against the car with his right hand on the side of your face and the other on your waist. he kisses you so voraciously, like if he tried just that much harder, he could swallow you whole.

“satoru, stop!” you giggle against his ravenous mouth, “a public indecency charge wouldn’t be a great start to our engagement, you think?”

“i can’t help it. my fiancée just looks so good, i don’t think anybody’d blame me if i hiked your dress up right here,” he says, leaning his head down onto your shoulder to leave a kiss or two on the bare skin. you gently push him away, coy look in your eyes when you meet his own.

“at home, the dress comes all the way off.”

satoru has you both in the car with the keys in the ignition and the gearshift in ‘drive’ within 14 seconds.

the front door to your apartment is solid wood, and it’s cold against your back where satoru has, yet again, found a surface to press you up against. you barely made it three steps inside before he was on you, groping and squeezing anything his reach would allow. his lips are sweet where they meet yours, kinda like how they always are, from all the desserts and wines he’d indulged himself in. and somewhere in there, a taste that’s wholly satoru resides. it’s your favorite flavor. his tongue never asks permission to enter your mouth—it just does, licking up every bit of you that’s on offer, and it never satisfies his appetite.

“what was that you said earlier, baby? you want me to eat you, right?” he says between his desperate kisses and fuck, when did everything get so hot all of a sudden? the hand you have on his shoulder slinks up, coming to find its place in the short hairs of his undercut, and when you scrape your nails against his scalp he sighs into your mouth.

“you’re not too full from your desserts?” you tease breathily but it cuts into a gasp of surprise when he yanks your dress up and shoves his hand under the bunched fabric to rip your panties off, only to find your bare skin at his fingertips.

“oh, fuck- no panties, baby? y’want me ta eat that pretty pussy this bad?” he doesn’t wait for an answer, snatching your lips up in a quick, biting kiss that leaves you dizzy. he drops to his knees—funny how much he’s done that today—and lifts your dress further, gathering the material up at your waist. the way satoru marvels at your pussy is something he’d always done but fuck, can you blame him? you get so wet and you taste like the world’s rarest delicacy on his tongue and you’re so fucking warm and tight when he digs you out—he’d sing hymns about your pussy from the top of a mountain.

“my pretty fiancée givin’ me such easy access…such a sweet girl you are,” he praises with a kiss to your mound, “so fucking good t’me.” but he’s just as good to you—especially now, as he spreads your thighs and hikes one of your legs over his shoulder, unhesitatingly dipping his tongue in between your soaking wet folds. the contact of the slippery muscle on your sensitive flesh has you mewling, eyes slipping shut as he feasts on you. his mouth is as slick as it is when he’s talking, stroking his tongue up and down from your clit to your hole, and back again.

“fffuck- satoru..” you whimper, subconsciously grinding your hips into his face. he doesn’t mind, though- actually he encourages it; he loves it when you use him for your pleasure, makes him feel good to make you feel good. and that rings especially true now, as he stiffens his tongue and slides it into your aching hole that’s been clenching around nothing this entire time. he fucks you with it, much like he does with his cock- giving you a mix of slow and fast thrusts and keeping you on your toes. his large hands smooth up your thighs before one sneaks away to aid in him pulling you apart. his thumb finds your clit, massaging the little button in circles and you almost lose your balance, your hand flying out to grip onto his snow-like hair. your little mewls act as encouragement for the man between your legs; he’s studied you—your body—for years, and how each little flick and roll and curl of his tongue or fingers brings you closer and closer to cumming all over him. and he uses that knowledge so freely, long tongue prodding and pressing further and further into you, tip of the muscle kissing your g-spot.

satoru knows you, knows that when your thighs shake and your breathing turns to panting, he’s got you right where he wants you. you confirm that for him, when you look down at him to see those sparkling blue eyes staring back up at you and you moan “god, fuck- ‘toru, please baby, don’t stop, gonna cum f’you.” he’s ever so obedient, thumb moving in faster circles around your clit and his unrelenting tongue fucking into you just as quick. he keeps his gaze glued to your face because you look so goddamn pretty when you cum that he can’t bear to miss it. and he doesn’t, watching lustfully as your head sinks back against the door, hips stuttering as he licks the orgasm right out of you.

“out of all the meals i’ve had tonight,” satoru starts, lips shiny with your release when you open your eyes again, “you’re the most delicious.” you’d laugh at how corny he is, but your mind still hasn’t come fully back to you yet. satoru rises back to his normal stature of towering over you, even in your heels, and he can’t help but to dip his head down and kiss you. all those same flavors from before are muted behind the taste of you, and you almost hate to admit it, but you like that a lot.

“i need to be inside of you, baby,” satoru sighs into the kiss, leaning down to wrap his big hands around your outer thighs, and you get the idea quickly, letting him pick you up so you can wrap your legs around his hips. he carries you off to the bedroom, laying you down on the plush comforter that covers your bed. you sit back on your elbows and toe your heels off, eyes following his movements as he takes off his blazer.

“god, you look-“

“fuckable?”

“very.”

“so, what are you waiting for? fuck me, fiancé.”

he takes your invitation with fire in his eyes, moving in close to undo whatever horrid contraptions are keeping you clothed. when he gets the zipper down, he’s practically ripping you out of the dress, tossing the expensive garment off somewhere behind him. he’s pulling his own clothes off just as quickly, and when he gets his pants down you can’t help but to feel him through his black boxer briefs. he’s so hard, and he’s leaking like a goddamn faucet, the wet spot you feel near his tip growing larger and larger. he’s groaning against your neck as you touch him, pushing his hips into your palm desperately. but then he decides that he can’t take the teasing and the waiting anymore, so he’s sitting up on his haunches to shove his boxers down his thighs. he doesn’t even get them fully off before he’s grabbing your calf and dragging you towards him, gripping the base of his painfully stiff cock to line it up with your sopping pussy hole.

“ohmy-GOD, fuck- ah! satoru, slow downnnn!!” you gasp, crying out for him as he slams into you with no warning and sets a pace that could rival a jackrabbit.

“s-sorry, baby, jus’ need you- need you so fucking bad, shit- hnnng, fuuuck,” he moans, gripping your hips tight as he keeps hammering into you. you can’t keep your eyes open as much as you’d like to—satoru always looks so angelic when he’s flushed and panting from the vice-like grip your pussy has on him—but it’s okay, because he moans like a bitch in heat when he’s fucking you and that’s all you need. your nails are digging into whatever they can find, one hand twisted up in the blanket and the other pressed against satoru’s flexing abs as if you’re trying to stop him, but you both know that’s not true.

“so. fucking. wet.” he groans, punctuating each word with a hard thrust. he’s so deep inside that you know you’d feel him if you touched your belly, and the thought has tears of pleasure spilling down to your temples and into your hair.

“y-you feel so fucking good- ah- mmm- look so p-pretty taking my cock like this,” he whines, one hand leaving your hip to find your throat. he doesn’t add pressure, doesn’t squeeze, just lets his hand rest there like he needed to ground himself. he finds himself angling his hips just a little differently, and only a moment later, he knows he’s got it when your teary eyes shoot open and you scream his name.

“right there, angel? my fiancée likes it t-there?” he teases, trying his hardest to keep some composure but fuck, it’s so hard when you clench that tight cunt of yours and suck him deeper and deeper.

“yeeessss,” you sob, “please! feels..so good…love you so much, love the way you fuck me..” satoru moans with you, snaking a hand under your lower back to arch you a little more, and the slight change of position has him hitting your g-spot head on with his merciless thrusts. you cum, wordlessly and unexpectedly, and satoru’s eyes widen as he looks down to see the ring of your cream that covers the base of his cock.

“ohhhh f-fuck yeah, angel, cream all over my dick, ‘s all yours, always- always yours,” he gasps.

he brings you fully into his lap and your arms instinctively curl around his neck, your head falling back as he bounces you on his cock that’s impaling you. you’re both covered in sweat now, and your slick, too—it leaks down around satoru’s dick and onto your thighs. the eye contact he makes with you in this moment is hard to look away from, so you don’t—eyes locked with his while you pant and moan and whimper his name. he does the same right back to you, choking out declarations of his love interspersed with your own name.

soon, the position changes again, when you use the little strength you have left to push satoru onto his back with your hands splayed out on his chest. he groans in surprise, sliding his hands up your hips to hold onto your waist. your gaze shifts between his blissed-out face and the sparkling stone that rests on your finger, grinding against him nice and slow.

“does this feel good, satoru?” you don’t mean for the question to come out as seductive as your tone does, but it has his hips bucking up into you nonetheless. his eyes open to find yours and he nods, digging his fingers into your flesh more when you ride him harder, roll your hips a little faster.

“f-fuck, feels like heaven, baby..keep- mmf, keep fucking me like t-that,” he answers, and you’re his sweet girl, his giving little angel, so you do. you keep fucking him just like that, pulling yourself up and dropping back down on the lengthy cock inside of you. your ass smacks against his thighs on the landing, and it joins your ragged breathing and satoru’s huffs as the only sounds in the room. he can’t help but to meet your hips with his own thrusts, not keen on taking the reigns back but adding to the insurmountable pleasure you both feel.

“will you cum with me? please, ‘toru- need to feel you..” god, how could he ever deny you when you ask so sweetly, one hand still on his chest and the other on yours, palming at your tit with a pinch of your pert nipple every now and then. his brow is furrowed—plush lips parted with his moans and he’s nodding in response again.

“yeah, baby, yeah- ‘m so fucking- hah- c-close.” a look of focus forms in his eyes when one of his hands slips down from your waist, nimble fingers toying with your sensitive clit. your moans rise in pitch and volume, heart pounding in your chest as you get closer and closer to the edge. you can practically feel him pulsing inside of you, know he’s almost there too, and you ride with more determination, tits bouncing with the effort. he looks so desperate from his position beneath you, desperate to cum, desperate to fill you to the brim with his hot load. you’re left gasping, shouts of his name torn right from your throat when he plants his feet into the mattress and starts to thrust up into you, fingers still pinching and pulling at your engorged nub. he fucks into you so roughly, eyes shifting between the spot where you conjoin, watching raptly as his cock slides in and out of your hole, and your sweet face, mouth hung open and tear streaks on your cheeks. both are a pretty sight to him.

“‘m gonna cum, ‘toru- cum for me, too, need it inside me so fucking bad,” you whimper, and you weren’t lying. only a few more thrusts and some circles rubbed onto your clit and you’re crying his name, creaming all over his cock again. and satoru can’t hold off anymore, doesn’t want to, and the way you clench and squeeze him makes that an impossible feat anyway. he stills his hips the best he can but they still stutter with the intensity of his orgasm, letting out rope after rope after rope of his sticky fluid inside of your needy little hole.

you roll off of him when you get the strength to do it, still panting with the exertion. but satoru is clingy, even more so after sex; so with your eyes closed, you don’t see it, but rather feel the man’s hands tugging you close. he drapes his sweat-sticky body around yours, nuzzling his face into your neck where he leaves a few cheeky kisses.

“thank you.” it’s silent for a while before he speaks, and the words have you cracking your eyes open to look at him. he’s already beaten you to the punch, wide blue eyes looking up at you.

“for what?” you respond, bringing your hand up to smooth his hair down. he practically purrs at the sensation, but he answers you regardless.

“for saying yes to me, to forever.”

the snort that comes out of you is unintentional, but you can’t help it. he sounds silly thanking you for that, so you tell him as much.

“satoru, you make it sound like you had to bribe me into being with you when you say things like that. y’know, i meant what i said, about you being stuck with me. couldn’t get rid of me if you tried, baby. this just makes it..more official.”

“guess that’s true, huh?”

“you’re damn right. and when we get married, i’m going to use my new powers for evil.”

“what??”

“oh, yeah. i’m gonna terrorize everyone. pranks galore. and i’ll tell them gojo did it. and they’ll just assume it was mr. gojo, not the kind and sweet mrs. gojo.”

satoru’s jaw drops, sitting up to gape at you. you just shrug in response, smiling innocently at your soon to be husband. he shakes his head, deep in thought for a moment before he grins, eyes hard set on you.

“what?” you ask, playfully narrowing your own eyes.

“i think i want to marry you tomorrow.”

>authors_note: WELL. it’s finally here (took me long enough i knowwwww🤫) ENDLESS THANKS FOR 100 (we’re almost at 200 now but let’s cross that bridge when we get there heheh)

>next up: firefighter!satosugu (after like 3 months of me talking about it IM SORRYYY)

>thank you for reading ♡︎

>masterlist.exe

>send a request here!

© loko4koko 2024

[yourpsicodelicbitch]

Sun houses and fathers 🌞

Yoshitomi Nara

✨first post of 2024✨

take what resonates, leave what don’t 🎀 you don’t have to necessarily identify with it.

*I use whole sign system -house system- for more certainty

9H: you’re learning constantly from your dad. he teaches you what he’ve learned through his life. he’s teaching you about his mindset, the origin of his beliefs, why he stands for them. he could be someone very religious or faithful, and through that faith he could have teach you things he know now. also, he could be really philosophical and probably has a fixation with politics, investing. he could seem very patient or is constantly worried trying to understand how he can help you.

10H: your dad could be someone really hardworking, who you could have seen work really hard through all this years, making sure you’re satisfied in the economic and study aspect. he could have not been present too much when you were growing up and when he showed up he was too strict, he probably wasn’t conscious or didn’t know how to approach you -could be bc they thought him to bottle up his emotions-. you could end up studying/working on the same career/field your dad’s in.

11H: your dad it’s okay with who you are, or what side you show to them🧐. you’re their fav or they left you. you could feel like the only child/you are. he could seem too disperse, take it how you want to. idk why but mostly of dads of sun 11H are younger than what’s expected. he’s permissive. you were a spoiled kid, that has to do with your dad. “dreams” that word is important, he had a lot of influence and power over yours, he could have destroyed them or making sure you have all the resources -depending on the aspects-.

12H: your dad won’t judge your decisions or you. he’ll be a support. he could have difficulties to put limits in a father-son relationship, you could have felt stressed when you’re seeing how your dad is being bullied by your siblings bc of that attitude. you could have being the one who is protecting them or you’re the more serious/introverted one in the dynamic. or the total opposite: he’s too strict and you had to be careful on how to act. there’s something that happened there… you two could share something obvious, an interest, physical appearance, an adjective, etc. something everyone can point out. also, you could feel a strong or subconscious connection with your dad’s sight of the family.

5H: idk why I have the feeling you didn’t saw your dad for a long time and then you saw him, I’m trying to express that your relationship with him it’s not constant. he could be explosive or impulsive. he could contradict himself so much. he could have had you without planning it/unexpected -you were a surprise for him 🤩-. could be that your parents were young when they had you and etc. that’s why you’re like an experiment 😭 your dad doesn’t know how to approach you and he has a temperament. emotions here are fiery, when each other express their emotions they don’t take a seat and have a chat with a cup of tea, they’ll say how they feel crying and screaming.

6H: your dad could have OCD, no, I’m lying, but he could be really fucked up about order. “thinks have to be like this, why you didn’t let me this at this time?” Or the total opposite, not in the middle. he could get sticker in his routine and if things are not how he planned he get stressed. a perfectionist. he could be strict or conservative. he’s sarcastic, that’s why you could be sarcastic too. he’s hardworking and also could help on campaigns and etc. at some point you could have helped him on working on his health. and you could be the one who end up taking care of him/being the sibling who spends more time with him.

♡ Based on personal experience and what I’ve analyzed in my surroundings.

♡ English is not my first language.

♡ I’m not a profesional astrologer.

Thank youu. baibaiii🫣🫶🏼💋

Do not copy. Please give me credits.

[lotusmi]

⊹ learning to take what is yours in your mind

assumptions, beliefs and acceptance࿐

"You have nothing to do but convince yourself of the truth of that which you desire to see manifested.- Neville"

"I am asking you to believe your Imagination is Real" + "Chances are you truly are NOT giving yourself what you want because you feel some ''impossibly'' in it. Forget that. All things are possible in the Imagination. Do it anyway. Just do it. Do what? What you deeply want. Do you for only you, you Inner Self." - Edward Art

Your Imagination is your real reality. In Imagination you can claim to be or have anything you want, simply because you wanted and then decided you have it already. Since everything is already created in Imagination, every desire you could think of already exists, and it's already yours. What you assume you have or are within is always reflected by the outerworld.

Acceptance of a desire does not have to do with accepting something in the 3d, but with a inner conviction of having what you want in the real reality, 4d, Imagination. This does not means you cannot doubt it, it means that even if you doubt, you still will get it because you decided if you persist in having.

If you still think it's hard to assume something new to yourself, it's probably because you did not understood yet that Imagination is the only reality, and that what you see in the outer world is but a reflection of your Imagination. Everything starts within, as within, so without. Your goal is be IN IMAGINATION ONLY.

☆Making things, changing things, creating things, it's not your goal. Your goal is change the feeling of "I", fulfilling Self in Imagination only.

1. I remember my only goal is to BECOME the one I want to be IN IMAGINATION ONLY. 2.  I think about something I want to be, anything. Then I assume I AM that IN IMAGINATION, and in Imagination I can be all things. 3. When I say the words, “I AM” I am not speaking about this outer-body but the Inner Man. The Inner Man to me is I AM and I know that all I must change is I AM to change my life. 4. I accept that I AM that Inner Man EXPERIENCING in present tense what I desire. - EdwardArt

How to assume?

'by believing the thing you want already exists in your life'

Assume -> to believe that something is true, even though no one has told you or even though you have no proof [no evidence in 3d]. Acceptance of an idea, even if there's no evidence.

"you will have faith that what you are stating, though there is no outward evidence to support it, is a fact in consciousness"

"Their faith was their great expectancy, their inner feeling [knowing], their inner conviction that something miraculous would happen, and that their prayer would be answered, and it was"

"faith is always a decision. No one can force you to believe in anything. The choice is yours."

Belief -> an acceptance that something exists or is true, especially one without proof [of 3d].

There is only one way to believe something truly and completely: Take action as if it is true, regardless of lack of evidence, doubts, fears, etc (...) = DECISION.

Acceptance -> agreement with or belief in an idea, the action of consenting to receive or undertake something offered. A person's assent to the reality of a situation, recognizing a process or condition (often a negative or uncomfortable situation) without attempting to change it or protest it.

☆ Accept that you have what you want in Imagination.

"Your inner acceptance must become an intense, unalterable conviction which transcends both reason and intellect, renouncing entirely any belief in the reality of the externalization except as a reflection of an inner state of consciousness." - Neville Goddard

What do you want? Dare to appropriate it, dare to actually appropriate the feeling of the wish fulfilled.

feeling = knowing | feeling of the wish fulfilled -> knowing your wish is fulfilled in Imagination because you decided, then It's done.

"you determine what you want in this world [decide], and you go right into that state [wish fulfilled]. And then ignore the facts[ignore 3d, BE in 4d] Suppose the facts now still deny what you did…it doesn’t matter, let the facts remain [it's done, persist in your assumption], they’ll dissolve." - Neville

+ methods (visualizing, affirming, listening to subs, etc) are just TOOLS to make yourself REMEMBER (feel/know) you have your desire.

+ READ -> Imagine as if there was not outside world. It is just you and your wonderful imagination. [how to feel]

"You cannot wait for the world to change to what you want. You must change what you are and have in Imagination. If you are tired of what your world is reflecting, you can be confident it will keep reflecting that until you change YOU inside your Consciousness. This calls for radically giving yourself what you desire IN Consciousness." - Edward Art

♡ "Stop telling me what you don't want and tell me what you ARE."

[leaves-fall-down]

I’m just very confused on why you guys think Jk Rowling is denying the holocaust. She isn’t denying the holocaust itself.

She said that Trans people weren’t the first ones to be persecuted, and that’s true. The Nazis primarily were against the Jews. She didn’t say that the trans people weren’t targeted at all as far as I know. Im very confused.

Alright. Since you wrote this from what I'm assuming is good faith, I will reply as politely as I can. Sorry if anything comes off as rude, I just have a somewhat blunt way of speaking and talking.

Despite being a best selling author of books with a political message, all of which smack you over the head with it, JKR isn't particularly good at making arguments for her beliefs. So, any confusion is alright, and forgiven, because she herself is a confusing debater.

So, *I* did not say she's denying the entire holocaust. I don't know what other folks are saying, but *I* never said she's denying the entire Holocaust-she was denying the very specific act, an atrocity really, of nazis burning books about trans people. However, denying any atrocity of the Holocaust is still, y'know, bad. To me, denying one aspect of it is just as gross and harmful as denying the whole thing. But that's me and my view.

Second, nowhere in the original tweet is the person in the screenshot that she's replying to saying that trans people were the first victims of the nazis. (see below). They aren't saying that at all, what they're saying is that trans books/research were burned by the nazis (Which. Uh. They were!). In her original post, JKR denied book burnings done by Nazis, specifically books about trans people. Which is verifiable and correct. The nazis did in fact do that. So yes, she's denying an aspect of the holocaust. That is objectively what she's doing.

Then, later (see below), likely because she was mad at this other girl for pointing out that her tweet is spreading false information (and again, is specifically denying an atrocity of the holocaust), Rowling herself is the one who switches it up from "Uh, nu uh never happened!" to "Well no no I'm just saying they didn't burn all of the books in Germany and that they weren't the first victims!"

The poster, Alejandra here, calls her out again (see below). Because she never said that! The person there in the original screenshot that she's posting also doesn't say that anywhere in their original tweet!

Then, instead of just apologizing, she decided to move the goalposts and accuse Alejandra of lying, specifically of lying about a point that JKR was the one to switch to, and then used an entirely different tweet to accuse this girl of lying about something she and the screenshotted person never even said. She's doing this because she's embarrassed that someone called her out for denying an atrocity of the holocaust, that's whats going on here.

Again: the person she was originally responding to didn't say that trans people were the first victims or that every last book on them in Germany was destroyed, and this Alejandra person certainly didn't say that either, so now JKR is quite literally accusing this girl (who she wasn't even originally arguing with!) of lying over a third separate person's tweet, and over a point that JKR herself was the one to switch over to in the first place. Because she's embarrassed and mad that she was called out as a denier of part of the holocaust over her first tweet.

And please don't give me the argument of "oh well technically Alejandra asked where anyone said that, though 🥺". JKR moved the goalposts and accused this girl of lying because she got embarrassed, and then pulled out a third separate person's tweet out, because she's simply embarrassed for being called out as a holocaust atrocity denier. She was so embarrassed and flustered over being a holocaust atrocity denier that she quite literally moved the goalposts of her argument instead of just apologizing for denying part of the holocaust. Like a normal person hopefully would.

If Rowling originally just wanted to argue that trans people weren't the first victims, then she should have posted a response to that second screenshot she had in the first place, instead of the one she originally posted. But we all have eyes here, and can see that what she originally did was deny an atrocity of the holocaust entirely through her original tweet. Everything after came through sheer embarrassment at being called out, and "no I'm just saying trans people weren't the first victims!" is deflection on her end, because she is embarrassed that she was called out and corrected.

TL;DR: JK Rowling is a holocaust atrocity denying bigot. That's it. That's what she's revealed herself as, and when corrected, she simply moved the goalposts instead of apologizing. That's a solid and morally sound reason for anyone to no longer consume her work if transphobia by itself wasn't enough.

[takeme-totheworld]

You Can't Go Home Again

I'm someone who walked away from my childhood religion almost twenty years ago, and I'm very firmly at a place in my life now where I am very happy to be through with it and have zero lingering desire to go back. I've also been out as some kind of queer person for the same almost-twenty years, and I've been out as trans for almost fifteen of those years.

If you knew absolutely nothing else about me or my life except for those major plot points, and the fact that I'm a Good Omens fan, it would be reasonable to assume that I would identify with Crowley far more than Aziraphale. At least at this point in my life. And in fact, I've seen many fans with backgrounds similar to mine say that they used to be much more like Aziraphale when they were younger, but nowadays they see far more of themself in Crowley. Which makes sense, as a trajectory for people who grew up in controlling religions and then left!

I've been trying to figure out what it is about me that makes me so automatically take Aziraphale's perspective when watching this show, even though the most aggressively Aziraphale time of my life was literal decades ago now. And I think that's probably a very complicated answer, but I realized today that I see an emotional struggle happening in him that I still wrestled with for years and years after leaving the church before I was finally able to completely put it to rest—the struggle to accept that some things can never go back to the way they were.

I seriously suffered so much over this for so long after I left the church. Despite all the damage it had done to me, my entire life had been intertwined with the church and a lot of things that were good—or at least deeply comforting in their familiarity—had also been a part of that. I had plenty of genuinely happy memories all mixed together with the harmful ones (which, in case you were wondering, is confusing as hell). There were fundamental human needs that I had only ever gotten met through the church, and as double-edged as what the church provided was, it was all I knew. Learning to get those needs met in new ways was much healthier, but it wasn't what I had always known growing up and it was a loss.

And I spent a long time refusing to fully accept that going back to any version of Christianity or the church just...wasn't ever going to be in the cards for me.

That is in the cards for some people, I know. Some folks who leave or get kicked out of ultra-dogmatic and controlling churches eventually find new homes in much more progressive and nurturing ones. And that's great! But that was never going to be my path. The process of seeing my childhood religion for what it truly was, losing my beliefs, leaving everything the church was to me further and further behind, and gradually learning who I was without it, changed me too much for me to ever be able to go back again.

I am fine with that now. More than fine. I'm healthier and happier now than I've ever been. Over time I grew into a version of myself that no longer has a church/religion/faith-shaped gaping wound in my life I'm trying to fill. But it was hard and painful and it took a really long time for me to get there. I spent a lot of my twenties and even a bit of my early thirties trying to find something...some new church community that I could be connected to in some way, that would give me back some of what I'd lost when I left my childhood church. But none of them ever did. I was never going to get the same things out of belonging to a church again, because I wasn't the same.

You can't go home again.

I see Aziraphale on that same journey and that's part of what makes my heart automatically go out to him and hurt for him, over and over again. He's still desperately holding onto the idea of a hypothetical version of Heaven and being an angel that can be home again one day. One where all the good things he remembers are still there, and still every bit as good, and all the bad parts have been fixed or gotten rid of, so that being there will be like the old times, only even nicer.

Except that even if he actually succeeded at somehow making Heaven the exact flavor of like-the-old-times-only-even-nicer that he is imagining, it wouldn't matter. Heaven is not his home anymore. He's already changed too much to be able to go back. He just hasn't accepted that yet.

[acesw]

The Grecos, Schneider, and her Religious Trauma

One of the characters I really find interesting is Schneider. There are strong signs that she has religious trauma, which ties really well with the neglect she's experienced growing up and the way this trauma reflects her behaviors and words.

The Grecos are known to be really religious, and they're quite devout to Christianity as a means of life. It does not mean that they wouldn't do things to ensure that they're able to at least eat. Living in Chicago of all places is already one struggle enough, making sure they get by despite having bad relationships with gangs adds so much.

Prior to moving, they were more devoted to God as coming from a community in Sicily. They moved because of how bad the poverty situation had been (the major Italian emigration in the 1900-1910s), hoping to seek a better life in America. Of all places though, they moved to Chicago, where there were crimes and gangs all about. This resulted to the Grecos having to pull strings to keep their head up the water, and they still practice Christianity as a means to maintain morale.

We then have Schneider. The youngest and most neglected child of the Grecos. She was barely fed and paid attention to among her 11 older sisters. The Narrator also notes that she was even neglected from the start, as she turned a year old before her father realized she wasn't baptized.

Now, there are two main instances that showcase Schneider's religious trauma peeking through are the traces "From One Castle to Another" and "Long Night Trip". Both of which are very much talking about Schneider's past. There are parts of the dialogue that stick out to me.

-From One Castle to Another

"It's impossible to keep every child well-fed. Schneider could not even get a piece of bread in the Eucharist. But a good daughter would not let anyone worry about her. She sat on the bench outside the church and hummed. She found a way out for herself."

"The Grecos are among them. They're covered by the dark cloud of long-handed umbrellas. [...] But you can't find Schneider. [...] It rains heavier. The priest opens his arms to embrace the sky, 'The Lord be with you.' " " 'And also with you.' Schneider responds in a voice that could hardly be heard. She puts her hand on her heart. This is the first time she responds to the Lord. And it will be the last."

-Long Night Trip

The Narrator talks about Schneider's slow descent into losing her faith in these conversations. She used to pray and hope that God would fix things and give an answer for her and her family's suffering. And all that happened was that it got worse.

It only ever makes Schneider question and doubt, and eventually she stops believing in God. But everyone around her, her family in particular, still maintains their strong belief that he'd guide them out of struggle. Meanwhile, she take things into her own hands for that matter.

And again, everyone would resort to praying, praying, and praying. Yet Schneider wouldn't dare try. Because if he listened to her this one time then they heard all the other times and never cared to help. That rubs salt in the wound.

So with this, we see how Schneider creates her newfound identity. She starts frequenting underground markets and doing certain odd jobs. She is able to make amends with other gang leaders and grow her own strong faction in Chicago.

All so she makes enough money for the rest of her family to eat and thrive. It showcases her sense of selflessness, her full care for her family despite how they treated her. She cares for them more than anything, because even with barely receiving love, they're the ones that raised her. Schneider actively does it all to prove that she can give.

Even in the main story there are those hints of that trauma seeping through. Throughout the game she refers to her bosses as "My Lord", a name that's usually reserved for God.

In the 'Green Oranges' segment of chapter 2, we see that Schneider's younger self describes America as a new world. A place of wonders, where blessings will be given and all sins will be forgiven. There, "God loves the world". Because back in Sicily, she believes that God does not love her and her family here. This ties back to the major Italian emigration in the 1900-1910s, where again, the poverty situation had been so bad. Not to mention the overpopulation and the natural disasters that came with it.

Meanwhile, her adult self is heavily injured from the gunshot wounds and Vertin stops shooting her. She expresses her frustration of being unable to die fast, which then turns to this: "Or did God finally forgive me...He allowed me...to stay alive!!"

"God would never make or guide one to that first action," Schneider thinks, because only she alone did it. She decided to step in, with no guidance of the God she once loved. The God that never forgave her.

The entirety of chapter 1 and 2 shows that her trauma runs really deep. The youngest and most neglected child turns into the most diligent and faithless Greco. She expresses her clear disdain for God, and does everything in her own power to do what "he never did for her and her family."

[ceilidho]

Can you give us a summary of Bear for those who don't watch the Six? Because I read the bear fic cause I love you're writing, but I'm kinda lost about him I'm general lol

yes of course!!!

basic synopsis [stole from wikipedia lol]: Six chronicles the operations and daily lives of operators who are part of SEAL Team Six.

(spoilers below)

the overarching plot is about the kidnapping and eventual murder of Rip Taggart, a former member of Team Six. the show also goes over the personal lives of each of the men on the team and how their military careers affect their personal lives

Barry plays Senior Chief Special Warfare Operator (E-8) Joe "Bear" Graves a.k.a. Foxtrot Delta 1/FD1

most important plot points to help you get into my fic:

Bear is married to Lena, a school teacher (they were high school sweethearts); in the first episode (which takes place i think about a year and a half or so prior to the actual start of the show), they just found out that they're going to have a baby girl

Their daughter ends up dying at just a couple months old; it's hugely tragic and has a profound impact on both characters, but Bear is outwardly struggling a lot

Bear is a very religious man (like the kind of guy that can quote scripture from memory), but throughout the show, his relationship with his faith is becoming more and more strained as he feels like he's being punished for all of the killing that he's done as part of Team Six

Since the death of their daughter, Bear and Lena have also been having a lot of trouble conceiving (hence, the fertility clinic scene with Bear jacking off) - we later learn that this is due to a fertility issue on Bear's side (another thing that he takes as a sign that he's being punished - this guy is having a rough fucking time)

All of this is obviously also having a profoundly negative impact on Bear's and Lena's marriage; through the two seasons of the show, they gradually grow apart and eventually separate. Bear is fighting this the whole way through; he's intensely jealous when he suspects her of dating someone else and also struggles with the idea of moving on himself.

(I don't think it's confirmed, but we all imagine he's like Baptist or something; again, I emphasize, deeeeeppllyyy religious.)

As mentioned earlier, his former team member and close friend, Rip, dies at the end of season 1, which is just another thing causing Bear to spiral. Earlier in season 1, Team Six also lost another comrade named Buckley.

I mentioned earlier that Bear struggles with the concept of moving on from Lena and finding someone else. At one point in season 2, he does eventually sleep with someone after a night out at the bar, and to me this is a crucial moment in his character development because it shows just how far he's drifted from the church and from his religious beliefs.

Things that happen in the show but I'm not putting in my fic:

At the end of season 2, Lena is shot and killed. I'm not super interested in putting this in my fic, so in my fic, they've just officially gotten divorced and she's moved away.

[rae-pss]

hello :D this is my first time requesting but I have read your self-aware whb and i possible can we have more crumbs of that au? I love your writing very much (o゜▽゜)o❤

masterlist

˗ˏˋ꒰ 💭 ꒱ . . . the worst thing about the free topic is the infinite things that can be talked about, and i don't know which one to choose right now (😭). also i'm working on levi in the self aware au, have faith in me please. btw, thanks for the sweet words (🥹🫶); i hope you like it, dear anon (<3). ˗ˏˋ꒰ 💭 ꒱ . . . lowercase intended

the worst, or rather, one of the most complicated and dangerous parts of the realization is, without a doubt, the obsession that certain winged individuals are being victims of.

that feeling once thought lost, of a higher being so close to them, whether or not that of god himself, has turned them into mere empty puppets seeking to feel that heat directly near them once again.

the point can reach such an extreme, in which a section of the angels is sent to do an exhaustive study to search how to reach you directly or how to bring you there with them.

know that a certain trio of seraphim will not hesitate to give their all, and even more, to achieve that. whatever blood, sweat and tears they must expend for it to be a reality. believe me, they're insistent in their beliefs.

you just have to hope, poor soul, that none of the possible options happen. you do not want to see yourself in front of any of these angels whose sanity abandoned them long ago.

[beesfairlyland]

ᵀᴿʸᴵᴺᴳ ᶠᴼᴿ ʸᴱᴬᴿˢ ᴮᵁᵀ ˢᵀᴵᴸᴸ ᴰᴵᴰᴺ'ᵀ ᴴᴬⱽᴱ ʸᴼᵁᴿ ᴹᴬᴺᴵᶠᴱˢᵀᴬᵀᴵᴼᴺˢ!!?

HELLO MUNCHKINS!!💗✨

So today I wanted to talk about manifestation taking so long. You must have gotten tired of trying again and again and still not seeing any movement in the 3d. Soo, today let's fix this problem!!

Firstly let's talk about what is manifesting...ik ik you all know what it is but let's go back to basics coz y'all need to put an end to your overconsumption and the habit of overcomplicating the law!!

Lesss gooo!!

What is manifesting?(Imo tho)

Manifesting refers to the process of bringing your desired reality into existence through the power of your thoughts and beliefs. It suggests that our assumptions about the world shape our reality. By assuming or believing that something is already true or already exists, we can attract it into our lives. The key is to focus on what you want, rather than what you don't want, and to believe that it is already a part of your reality.

Okay let's take my example:

Few weeks ago me and my best friend got into a fight and he said some really harsh and rude things to me. Obviously i cried at that moment but after few mins when i took all my emotions out. I said to myself No I don't choose this it's my Reality and i wiped my tears and said with authority he's gonna call me and apologize to me for everything he said and i didn't doubt it didn't give any second thought. I swearr within few mins he called me back and apologized to me i wasn't shocked coz i knew it's gonna happen.

See it's this simple! You just have to decide what you want and have full faith in it. Let's talk about how to do that!

How to manifest?

There's no hard and fast rule to manifest. It's your reality you choose what you want and how you want. But let's just talk about the basics you modify them accordingly.

Clarify your desires:- Take some time to reflect on what you truly want in life. Be specific and clear about your desires. You can't Manifest if you yourself don't know what you want.

Believe it's already true:- Once you have clarified your desires, assume that they are already true. Believe that they are a part of your reality, even if they don't appear to be yet and boom you've Manifested your desires. Ik for some of you it sounds to good to be true. But I'll try my best to make you believe it.

Okayy you see this ice berg right? What if i tell you that the exposed part is the only thing you know about i.e. the 3d that concious mind shows you and the rest hidden part is where the surprise lies! i.e. the 4d Reality which our subconscious mind creates.

Soo now you tell me whom you want to believe huh? The 10% of the concious mind or the 90% that our subconscious baby creates. Ohhh you still in lil bit of doubt😕 don't worry i got yaa!

This stoopid concious mind who thinks it knows everything relies heavily on the senses but our senses are not always correct! Have you ever seen something that appeared to be one thing, triggering a response and then you realise that you were wrong?

Such as seeing a snake and realising it was just a rope? Or thought someone was standing behind you only to Realise that it was just a jacket hanging? There are soo many examples of this!

"Okayy soo Bee what's the conclusion?"

The conclusion is these senses trick you, they try to fool you and want you to believe only them even when you know that 4d, your imagination is the only TRUE REALITY you still get tricked by them. Soo now whenever your senses disapprove something that you see in your imagination, deny them. Remind them you have seen it, you have it!

Now you might see yourself in mirror and say "but I don't see my desired appearance."

But i would say "noo baby you already have that beautiful appearance and look soo gorgeous idk what you taking about huh?😒"

Now ig I've made you understand how to believe that it's already yours ....and still you don't completely believe it all.

TEST IT ALL OUT FOR YOURSELF COZ ONLY YOU CAN MAKE YOURSELF BELIEVE 100% IN THE LAW!!

Whenever you have any doubt just say to it for what you've came huh? I already have it all don't try to fool me again! Ik this journey is not all sweet and smooth but trust me it makes you learn soo many interesting and new things. Don't be discouraged if you don't see it yet....may be have a look inside yourself and ask are you being completely honest with yourself? If you get the ans as a Yes then congratulations you are on the right path! But if you get your ans as No then sit down take a deep breath and comfort yourself and have some self talk... DON'T BE HARSH WITH YOURSELF AFTERALL IT'S ONLY YOU WHO'S GONNA WITH WITH YOU TILL THE END OF YOUR BEAUTIFUL JOURNEY!!

Hope I could explain y'all lil bit!🫶🏻

-Love, Bee💗✨

[frenchonionsoop]

How did Oda leave such a strong impression on Dazai?

OOHH ok i have a lot of thoughts on this topic so bear with me, this is gonna be a long one My interpretation is the first thing Dazai latched onto about Oda was his honesty.

Oda is a very straightforward person, he rarely ever if at all has an ulterior motive and it totally blindsides Dazai. He can't manipulate Oda because he'll take what he says too literally, he can't predict him - not because Oda is good at hiding his thoughts, he just naturally has the most unreadable resting poker face imaginable - and no matter what he does nothing seems to phase Oda (keyword "seems", it often does he just doesn't show it) , and it intrigues Dazai.

As seen with Chuuya we know Dazai gets hooked on people who surprise and/or impress him, so I can absolutely understand how he saw the enigma that is Oda and said "you're my friend now we're having soft tacos later <3".

I could go on for hours about the various times Oda has bamboozled Dazai and how each effected him profoundly in so many different ways, but that's a discussion for another time. I don't think just these factors would realistically warrant Dazai's drastic change in world outlook and spur on his sudden redemption arc, so what did?

I believe it was his complete lack of judgement. Despite Dazai's constant suicide attempts and harsh view of the world not once did Oda outwardly judge him for it, which is in some ways a blessing and in some ways a curse. Oda never viewed himself as qualified enough to call Dazai out, which in hindsight might've done harm as there were times were Dazai needed someone to call him out, but unbeknownst to Oda that lack of judgement gave Dazai room to breathe.

He saw right past the silly facade and the darker side to Dazai, he saw a "sobbing child abandoned in the darkness of a world far emptier than the one we're seeing", and he saw a friend.

And this is exactly why Oda's last words hit Dazai so hard. Odasaku, who never speaks up for himself, Odasaku, who's so genuine he'd believe a murderer if they simply said "I didn't do it", Odasaku, who is now telling Dazai life might just be little better if he decides to help rather than hurt.

Bleeding out on the floor of a mansion, in a desperate attempt to make up for all the times he didn't confront Dazai Oda has to find some way to get through to him and fast. His harsh words to Dazai on how he'll never find that happiness he so desperately craves are so jarring they snap him out of his panic, suddenly he's blindsided all over again, and that vulnerable state gives Oda's next words the chance to reach deeper - "be on the side that saves people."

In order to truly get through to him, Oda needed to level with Dazai, the only way to do that in such little time was to repeat back to him his own internal mantra of "never filling that hole that is his loneliness". It's clear his words are false, especially the line "nothing beyond your own expectations will happen" as Dazai's entire speech to Fyodor in the prison is about his belief in the unpredictable nature of human beings.

But regardless, that slap in the face of hearing his own self-destructive thoughts voiced aloud after going his entire life without ever considering anybody else could understand them heightened Dazai's faith in Oda's promise of a life that's "a bit more wonderful."

What makes me adore Oda and Dazai's friendship so much is how grounded and natural it feels. Oda isn't some perfect saviour who always knows exactly what to say, far from it, he was a 23 year old PM grunt with 5 kids and a love for spicy curry, but that's all he needed to be.

Sorry this is so ramble-y and long winded if you couldn't tell already Oda's my favourite character so I have a lot to say about him 😭 Thank you so much for the ask!!!

[crystaldivination]

PICK-A-CARD ❁ Words from the higher realms ❁ 

𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐄𝐒 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐀𝐃𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐄𝐒 𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅

Hello and welcome! In this intuitive pick a card reading, I will be delivering some comforting messages and advices from your higher self that you might need to hear. This is my first time trying to do a collective reading so please let me know if this resonates with you in some way. Thank you 🝮

⭒ masterlist • paid services • for tips ko-fi

how to choose your pile. take a few deep breaths ＆ look at each piles separately. Which pile sparks an interest in you? Which pile do you feel called out to the most or reminds you of something? Take your time and come back later to it again if you can’t seem to choose.

The piles

from left -> right

Disclaimer: this is a general reading which may or may not resonate with you. Take what resonates and leave out anything that doesn’t. Feel free to choose another pile if you'd like.

𝑷𝑰𝑳𝑬 𝑵𝑼𝑴𝑩𝑬𝑹 𝑶𝑵𝑬

This is your message. You’re on your right path, even if you don’t feel like it. Give it some time to see the results. You need to keep going and believe in yourself. Don’t give up even on the "slightest" disappointment. Get rid of your self-limiting beliefs. You’re almost where you want to be. Everything you desire will come to you at the right time. Most likely when you least expect it. "Divine timing" I heard. Go with the flow. Stay in the presence and take a leap of faith that your wishes will come true. You should trust the process. Your higher self is telling you to believe them. You’re divinely guided. Your blessings are on their way to you. Some of you might’ve even received their blessing already. Your higher self is always with you and leading you towards your life path. You should open your heart and mind to the things that surround you more. It’s a way to connect (better) with your higher self. Nature is prominent here. Try to go out in the nature and feel its energy. You will see that you’ll feel so much better afterwards. You might get some signs or hints through your spirits soon.

The message I got for this pile is on the shorter side compared to the other two piles but that’s only because you’re already on your right path and just need to work on your belief while persisting with your goals.

𝑷𝑰𝑳𝑬 𝑵𝑼𝑴𝑩𝑬𝑹 𝑻𝑾𝑶

This is your message. You might find yourself in a complicated situation right now which makes you doubt. Yet you don’t give up and still manage to stay hopeful. For that your higher self is proud of you. You might feel confused, not knowing what your goals are or where it all headed. Your higher self knows that it’s hard right now but they are telling you to listen to your heart. Your heart will know the answers. Sometimes it’s necessary to feel lost to find your way again. Your higher self is asking you not to isolate yourself!! Socialize more. That would do you well. You could benefit from it by gaining a different perspective on your situation. If you need help, ask for it. If you’re being offered help, accept it. You can rely on others as well. Turn to people you trust for support and take some time out for yourself to relax. Your higher self is also telling you to focus on the things that make you grow instead of dwelling on negative things. You might be used to feeling like there is no way to get out of where you are but remember there is always light at the end of the tunnel. You need to focus on that light. Don’t be swayed by the darkness that surrounds you because your will power and belief are much more stronger than that. Your higher self can prove it. They saw it already. Try to manifest. Picture your desired life and feel it happening before your eyes. That’s how your life gonna turn out. Promise! Lastly you should distance yourself from any kind of negativity such as people or things that are bad for you in some way. Declare to let go of what doesn’t serve you anymore.

𝑷𝑰𝑳𝑬 𝑵𝑼𝑴𝑩𝑬𝑹 𝑻𝑯𝑹𝑬𝑬

This is your message. Your higher self sees your anger, frustration and demand for love. You might have a hard time right now because I feel a lot of anguish and suffering in you. Some of you might "rebel" in some sort of way as a form to release or resist your emotions. Your higher self wants you to know that they are with you and that you’re not alone in this. This shall all pass. Remain strong to get through this.

You are advised to connect with strong minded and optimistic people to cultivate a positive mindset. Consider doing what is actually good for you. Some of you might intentionally doing things that don’t correlate with your feelings but doing the opposites won’t make it better. Instead try to be true to yourself and do what you truly want - for your sake. Be careful not to self-destruct. Your higher self is worried about you and wants you to sit down and reflect on your coping strategies. Cry if you need. Talk it out or write it down when your heart feels heavy. It can simply be a self talk. The most important thing is that you don’t neglect yourself. You are your best treasure. You’re worth your life. Your higher self wants to bring you out of your survival mode. They know you crave attention and seek love but they want you to look at yourself and give love to yourself first before seeking it from anyone else. They know your authentic self. Because they are you, right? They are saying that you don’t need to hide behind a tough demeanor. They love you. You should learn to be proud of yourself. You’re going through a major transformation in your life.

Thanks for reading! Like and reblog if you enjoyed it. Hope it's helpful for you too ♡

𝖧𝖺𝗉𝗉𝗒 𝖫𝗎𝗇𝖺𝗋 𝖭𝖾𝗐 𝖸𝖾𝖺𝗋 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝗈𝗌𝖾 𝗐𝗁𝗈 𝖼𝖾𝗅𝖾𝖻𝗋𝖺𝗍𝖾 🎊🧧

© 2023 Crystaldivination ── all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, edit, alter, or redistribute my work. Plagiarism in any form is prohibited.

[eddens-the-reporter]

The one thing I never see get brought up is that by the time Jason Todd confronts Tim at Titans Tower, Tim is on his second go-round at being Robin.

Tim’s dad made him give up Robin. At this point, the Robin that came before Tim - the Robin that most recently died - is Stephanie, not Jason. (As an aside, I don’t think Jason knows this because I don’t think Jason cares about any tragedies that happened after him - as in I don’t think he can wrap his head around life really truly carrying on without him.)

And so Jason challenges Tim on whether he deserves Robin as though it’s something Tim has never had to consider. Jason thinks he’s playing mind games; he hopes Tim will come out of this with self-doubt and mistrust in Batman. Tim, meanwhile, very recently watched someone else take over as Robin - directly as a result of him stepping away - fuck up massively, and get herself killed. Tim had to have considered not only whether he wants to be Robin, independently of what Jack Drake and Batman seem to need, but whether he’s good enough to do the job. You could make the argument that Tim didn’t fully know what he was getting into when he first started; you can’t say that anymore at this point. Jason is interesting because surprise! he’s alive! but none of what he says or does is remotely new territory for Tim at this point.

It’s also important to me to note that Tim really loved and mourned Steph, much more than he cared about Jason. I don’t think this does anything to Tim’s belief that he’s better at being Robin than Steph was, but in my heart it does mean that he wouldn’t accept Jason claiming any special authority because he died as Robin; Steph did too.

(And on the subject of Titans Tower timing, in-universe we are maybe a couple months after Jack Drake’s dying words to his son being that he was proud of him for being Robin, so do with that what you will)

Idk, I think there’s some interesting stuff to consider in the way that this comic makes Jason seem stuck in a time period when tragedies were more shocking and faith in heroes was more groundbreaking. He doesn’t know how to challenge the Robin of the present, who’s so familiar with grief and uncertainty that it doesn’t faze him in the same way it would - did? - faze Jason. Like, would it have shaken Tim more if Jason had known to bring up Stephanie? If Jason had questioned whether Tim is honouring Steph and his father by being Robin, and whether Tim thinks it would get someone killed (again) if he stopped? Would it have thrown Jason if Tim brought up Stephanie?

[ivesambrose]

꧁𓊈𒆜𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐰𒆜𓊉꧂

1. 2. 3.

4. 5. 6.

This reading is timeless 🖤 ⏳

And based on law of assumption 🌹

To book a personal reading with me DM or email me at jovescorpioreadings@gmail.com with your name and query 🌙

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Picture 1

You've done enough.

You do not need to overdo this at all. Why are you pushing yourself to take actions? Understand the difference between "inspired action" and continously wondering what you should do next in a way that makes you feel hopeless.

With that being said, you're not hopeless.

You're not stuck either.

The answer you're searching for is to come when you stop seeking it. Sounds simple? Because it is.

Shift your perspective. Flip the narrative.

Once again, you've done the work.

Affirmations:

⋆ What I seek is seeking me.

⋆ My manifestions come to me naturally.

⋆ I deserve to feel my feelings and still know that things will work out.

⋆ My heart/I am safe from bitterness / bitter people.

Picture 2

It's on it's way relax!

It's money isn't it? Or something that makes you feel emotionally safe too? It's yours. Stop LOOKING for it. Would you go out and stand outside for your amazon order knowing it's gonna show up anyway?

Rest. Chill. Visualize. You'll see it happen in your dreams, these dreams are confirmations.

The world, my friend is your oyster.

This or that? Why not both?

Have fun and see things come quickly. You don't have to be so serious all the time.

Affirmations

⋆ My manifestions are always instant.

⋆ I gotta declare once and I have it.

⋆ What I want comes to be effortlessly.

⋆ I always have more than enough.

Picture 3

Stop applying logic to your desires and dissecting them especially when you're harming no one but yourself.

Manifestion overrides logic.

When will you stop holding onto beliefs and assumptions that are keeping you from getting what you want? No one's going to change anything but yourself and there's no one to change but yourself.

Let go of that addiction. The need to constantly check and seek validation.

Actually, drop everything. You need a break.

You can't be double minded you know?

This one has a bit of tough love to it, but I feel you need it right now.

Please recognise your worth and stop repeating the same pattern hoping for a different outcome.

Affirmations :

⋆ I let go of whatever that's no longer serving me. Be gone.

⋆ Universe / guides / whatever you have faith in - always has my back.

⋆ I will always be shown the right way.

⋆ I am not a victim. I don't have to struggle.

Picture 4

You'll have peace and you'll make the right choice.

Set your boundaries. Be quiet about your goals and your thoughts when you know someone might try to project their own insecurities onto you.

Sometimes it's okay to be selfish.

It's okay to unlearn what you've been taught for so long. It's also okay to not follow the crowd.

Your mind is so beautiful, so precious and so unique. Please honour your thoughts and please continue ro write, if not for others but for yourself.

I know it gets lonely but you won't be alone for too long, I promise.

It's okay to go through cycles and it's beautiful to embrace change. The change you've been waiting for.

It's okay, you're okay. Even if you're not, you will be. You always are.

Affirmations :

⋆ I got this, I aways got this.

⋆ Sad for them, but I'm built different.

⋆ Everything always works out in my favor.

⋆ Everything is a bridge of incidence for me.

Picture 5

You're already determined as hell.

Stick to your vision, stick to the new story, persist on the bigger picture. You already know this. So you already got this.

You've taken time in building yourself up so you won't be giving your power away to anyone or any circumstances.

I believe you know this already that circumstances do not matter in your reality.

I also want to remind you that the love you want, wants you even more.

The money? The career? Wants YOU.

The beauty? It's already yours.

Stay in this sweet receptive energy. I'm proud of you, you've got this.

Affirmations :

⋆ It's done.

⋆ It's already mine.

⋆ I have nothing to worry about.

⋆ Everything is rigged in my favor.

Picture 6

Trust in the unseen, trust in the unknown. Because you've always had the power.

Justice will be delivered, how and when? Not your concern. Same goes for anything that you want.

When? How? Why? What's it to you? Why focus on crumbs when you can have it all?

I believe you have at least one person or connection you deeply trust. They want the best for you as you for them, cherish this and focus on the feeling this brings you.

The right connections, the opportunities, the circumstances will all unfold suddenly and when you least expect it. Enjoy the ride.

Listen to your intuition and remember what you deserve. Do not settle till you have what you want.

Again, you weren't made for bare minimums.

Affirmations :

⋆ I am beautiful, inside and out.

⋆ I radiate (insert whatever energy you want to identify with)

⋆ I have spoken so it's done / because I said so.

⋆ If I can picture it, I can have it, it is mine.

[skaldish]

Helloooo,

I’m not sure if this would be an odd question or not so I’ll give a bit of context for it before I ask: basically I’ve wanted to try and worship/work with Loki and become Lokean for a few years, I’ve always been extremely drawn to Him and He’s the first deity I felt like I loved—I’ve been fixated on him since I was around 8 years old and it was around about then that I wanted to become a heathen, and that’s stuck with me for all these years.

The only problem is that I’ve always been a huge skeptic and I’ve been an atheist or atheist-leaning agnostic (depending on the day) for my entire life, I’ve tried several religions and having faith in multiple deities (Loki included) but every time I try I feel like I just can’t connect with any faith, I can’t believe no matter how much I want to and try to, and I just start getting anxiety around it.

Again this might sound a bit odd but I see the sorts of connections other people have with their deities and how close or happy they are and I’d really like that sort of connection as well. I know religion and faith and a connection with a deity can’t be forced but do you know if there’s any way that I can help myself find faith, and more specifically faith in Loki?

The concept of “having faith”—or unquestioningly believing in a higher power exists without any evidence to support its existence—is a Christian thing. As in, this is a feature unique to the religion of Christianity, especially the Protestant branches.

The state of “having faith” in this manner is actually a state of cognitive compromise. Protestants learn to react to feeling doubt by initiating a certain script of affirmations, which produces feelings of euphoria and drowns out the sensation.

This doesn’t actually make the doubt go away, though. All it does is block the sensation from their conscious awareness.

Doubt is an essential part of our reasoning, and it goes away with verification, not with belief. If I doubt that a wild berry is edible, no amount of “having faith” is going to verify whether it’s edible or isn’t. It’s only by gaining clarity about the nature of the berry do I satisfy my doubt, and this will happen regardless of what the nature of the berry ends of being (edible or not).

At no point should we believe in anything without a satisfactory reason.

I acknowledge Loki as a phenomenon not because I have faith in him, but because I experience him, the same way I experience the sky being blue or the phenomenon of “Autumn”. All it takes to get this experience is to ask the gods to verify themselves for you. (Granted, you’ll want to make sure they’re around to hear you first. Leaving them offerings in a companionable manner is a good way to go about this.)

This is also how I started things off for my own practice. I asked Loki for evidence, and he gave me it through a magnitude of different channels; dreams, synchronosities, physical portents, nonphysical portents, and whatever else was in his capacity to orchestrate as a non-corporeal being. It was a non-insignificant pattern of data. It made me extremely curious and I’ve been playing in this space ever since.

(My doubts still rear up, of course, but that’s because I’m anxious and get stuck doubting my own judgement.)

I would recommend taking this approach for yourself.

[wynought]

since i haven't seen it being pointed out before

all of the first stoats' names essentially mean "light"

kiran is of sanskrit origin meaning "ray of light" (and, according to wikipedia, an explicitly unisex name), uri is a hebrew name meaning "my light", hester is a variant of the name esther (of biblical/jewish origin) which comes from the same old persian root as the word "star", and, while i didn't find any particularly reliable source, various babyname websites at least seem to agree that jomei is a japanese name meaning "spread light"

additionally, their names seem to correlate with their purpose/position in last bast:

jomei is the speaker, they are in charge of propaganda - quite literally spreading the belief system and worldview of the first stoats aka the Light. it feels like this name is extremely straightforward in its meaning, but i was also unable to find much else on it, so there may be some additional hidden truth that i'm missing so far.

hester is the silence (the one with the gas mask missing their lower jaw and tongue) and their sphere of influence is secrets. now, i'm no religious scholar, and i have all of my information from quite literally the introductory paragraphs of the wikipedia article on the name esther. however, it seems that queen esther only took this name after ascending to the throne of persia to hide her true identity. this is reflected in the hebrew root of the name esther translating into "hide"/"conceal". (i am unable to provide more info on this, but anybody with a working understanding of how hebrew works and/or with more insight on the book of esther, feel free to interject/correct/add on to this)

uri is our beloved stoat pope. apparently, the name uri comes from the verb for "to shine" (to either be or to give light) and the mark of possession, resulting in the first connotation i mentioned earlier - "my light". this possessive marker, however, can also be interpreted as the name Yah which would be an abbreviation of YHWH - a marker of the divine, if you will. Therefore, Uri can also mean "Yah is my light", a very fitting name for the stoat whose department we only see called "faith".

i was unable to find a deeper meaning behind kiran's name, although to me "beam of light" feels very much like a name befitting the first stoats' leader. considering the way they commanded the wolf of theseus, it also seems to reflect the way their magic/their brand of control worked (their line of sight was part of how they controlled the wolf, indicating that was a key part of either their magic or the conditioning inflicted on the wolf - i'm partial towards the latter, considering how the wolf reacted to tula after she healed it). if anybody has anything more concrete to offer, though, i am all ears!

anyways, the first stoats' names are really cool, and we as a fandom don't talk enough about them because they died so fast. huge props to aabria for this fun bit of world building!

(disclaimer: as mentioned above, i have no background in theology or judaism, nor do i have any deeper knowledge of sanskrit, hindi, and indian mythology/folklore, nor japanese, and japanese mythology which would give me a deeper understanding of these names. my information comes from google and while i did try my best to verify the claims, i am fallible and happen to currently be very tired, so please correct me, if i made any mistakes!)