#my besties in discord knows whats up HI

[synth-operator]

the literal reason why I haven't posted in a while-

he's been in my head for days, please don't help me <3

[drxxmingofblue]

hand in unrebloggable hand (because we always go down together)

TUMBLR X TWITTER FANFIC 5K ANGST WITH A HOPEFUL ENDING

besties im not joking abt the word count i fucking ✨wish✨I ✨was though✨✨✨✨

also if you were hoping for twitblr to be the endgame ship then this fic is not for you sowwy >.<

based off of @zzoupz awesome fanart and dedicated to all the other cool fanart it unfortunately begat. Thanks babygirls. Squees. Thanks also to my discord friendz who are letting me pretend they're making me do this at gunpoint @loki-the-mad @suspicious-whumping-egg u da best

(edit) owo what's this?? An Ao3 link??

QUICK PSA THESE CHARAS ARE T4T OKAY HAVE FUN READING BAIIII *GLOMPS U*

~~~~~~~~

When Twitter stepped back into Tumblr’s yard, he noticed right away that things were different.

The house was bigger, there was some more color and it was less slapped-together looking. Sure, there were still some invasive tendrils of spambot ivy overgrowing the path, but a lot of the other stuff seemed a little… better.

When they knocked on the door, it opened almost right away, far before they felt ready, and he were face to face abruptly with someone he thought they’d cut all ties with.

Tumblr was humming to themselves along with the background music, “-out of touch, I’m out of ti-- oh. It’s you.”

He seemed surprised, awkward, but Twitter didn’t sense any animosity, which was a relief.

“Hiii,” Twitter said weakly, with a sheepish grin, “it’s me.”

Tumblr glanced around, as if checking for someone else to explain this to him, or hidden cameras from a reality show at least. Then he stepped out, closed the door behind him, and leaned against it, crossing his arms. “Is there something… what do you want?” he asked, expression settling into something distant and cool.

“Well…” Twitter took a deep breath, and then shook their head, forcing a brighter tone, and gesturing to Tumblr’s shiny silver barrette “--Um, hey, you look great! Is that a new icon?”

“... yes,” Tumblr said slowly. “I’m… trying out some different looks.”

“It’s great, yeah. And this place looks… amazing. Glad to see you’re moving up in the world. You must be excited with all the press, congrats!”

Tumblr didn’t say anything, giving them a neutral stare.

Twitter shifted, “Uhh… anyway… new adblocker?”

“No, same one. I’m just using it on Firefox now.” Tumblr gave them another suspicious eye, “Look, if you’re just here to catch up then can this wait until later? Because I'm pretty crunched for time right now with my weekly holidays thing and the campaign to get this one random user their 666k so they'll do self care."

"You know that's.. uhm, you know that's just for attention, right?" Twitter's brows knit, "They're probably not gonna follow through."

"Perhaps, and a lot of us want them to not be lying for internet points but it's not just about that anymore. It's about the community bonding over pettily slam dunking on a hapless chump who's gotta pretend now like they don't actually like all the notes. You wouldn't get it, it's a tumblr thi-" 

"Yeah, it's a tumblr thing, I know," Twitter gave a longsuffering sigh, "Ugh, i just... I need a place to stay, okay? And you’re the first site I could think of.”

“A place to stay,” Tumblr repeated flatly.

Twitter huffed. “Yeah. I’m sure you’ve heard about what’s going on right now at my palace..”

Tumblr’s eyes slanted off, his lips quirking in a way that looked suspiciously like amusement. “Heard about it. Read about it. Partied about it.”

Twitter ignored the sting of that, forging ahead. “I’ve never seen it so bad,” they said, voice wobbling piteously as they clutched their suitcase full of memes. “Everything’s in chaos, people are losing their jobs. I went into the basement yesterday to grab some badly aging tweets and the very foundations are cracking, Tumblr, I can’t stay there anymore, I just can’t.”

“So you come crawling back to me,” Tumblr said, “Expecting me to take you with open arms.”

“Yes. I do,” Twitter said, “I know a part of your userbase still wants to welcome me in. You were always sh*t at hiding your true feelings.”

Tumblr’s hand fluttered over his heart as if to protect it; he winced a little, taking a breath to keep his facade of composure. “So now- what, you want me to start dealing with your bullshit again just because you remembered how much better my posting format is? Just because you noticed how my reputation is changing? Did you think I’d be so desperate to fill the void now that Dracula Daily’s done? Or maybe,” 

Tumblr leaned closer to lord his height difference trope over Twitter, his eyes hooded with disparaging condescension, “Maybe you’re just here because you heard I’m finally allowed to take my shirt off again, is that it?”

“N-no!” Twitter protested, flushing up.

“Oh, i think it is,” Tumblr drawled, “But that’s really just too bad because in case you haven’t got the memo yet, I’ve moved on. You are not welcomed here. Not anymore.”

(link to art here) go look at it then come back

(AN: i had to google how to embed links into text and google was all like, "do you mean 'how do you put links INTO text' you moron idiot???" ugh don't like that wise guy)

“You don’t really mean that,” Twitter said, “Besides, you can’t stop me, can you? The sign up button is right there.” They pointed at the front door.

“No, I can’t,” Tumblr said, “But that doesn’t mean we won’t be able to clock you as twits by your censoring and bad takes. Look, your aura is already causing ripples in the sphere. Everyone’s coming out to gawk at you.”

He gestured out in the general direction of the porch and yard, and indeed there were users from every tag going 👀at them, murmuring amongst themselves in a swirling, chaotic crowd.

“Oh my god is it real this time? Is it happening?”

“GET THEM OUT GET THEM OUT STAY AWAY DEAR GOD NO-”

“Okay, everyone, stay calm, stay fucking calm-”

“Why are we focusing on this, it’s literally election day go out and vote???”

“Listenup, guys, we gotta be smart about this, remember the block button is your friend-”

“I for one welcome them, I think this is great-”

“No you idiot they’ll bring the negativity back! We like it to be a post apocalyptic wasteland here, nature was just starting to regrow!! I don’t wanna watch Thomas Sanders get cancelled again!”

“FIRE OFF SOME SHOTS, PRESERVE THE PROPERTY VALUE”

“mISHAPOCALYPSE 2022 ELECTRIC BOOGALOO”

"Has anyone asked Neil Gaiman what he thinks about all this?" one of the many voices yelled, louder.

"Oh, he's probably got a thousand asks about it already," someone yelled back, "Which he's not going to answer because he doesn't have any social media you fucking idiot,"

"That is correct. He doesn't," said Neil Gaiman. 

The whiplash was still euphoric. Everyone applauded this as enthusiastically as when the bit had first been established, not realizing that the pedestal upon which Neil Gaiman has been placed is growing higher and higher each day by their actions, putting him at increased risk of being a victim of cancel culture the second he says something the terfs can really rake their fingernails against if we can't get our parasocial relationship bullshit together real fuckin quick. 

The Monterey bay aquarium passed on by. It seemed to have nothing to add, you could say it was clammed up tight. But since it's a professional account it's definitely b-otter that way.

"Hai, fellow tumblypoos," said the corporate Denny's account, "I'm back with some more fun pancake posts for you guys!" 

Everyone ignored it. No one engaged it. No one even clicked onto the page, except to block it. 

"Oh, sweetheart, not like that," Ryan Reynolds said faux-helpfully, "see, the author of this clusterfuck is what they like to call terminally online. They bought a VIP pass to the devil’s sacrament. let me try." 

He cleared his throat, "Sounds like someone needs to go outside and touch some g-" 

The sky split open with lightning, vaporizing him instantly. A faint breeze carried gods message from the great beyond, a whisper of 'we #violence celebrities here, sir....'

"Anyway," Twitter said. 

"Wait, they saved the worst one for last," Tumblr said. 

Then Gerard Way came out onto the stage with Dan and Phil and they all kissed with tongue while patd played songs in the background. 

(AN: IF U DON’T KNOW WHO DEY R THEN GET DA HELL OUTTA HERE PREPZ!!!)

"Alright, go."

“Come on, Tumblr,” Twitter begged, “I just need a few nights, maybe I can stay in the plinko machine or something-”

“That’s how it always starts, though, isn’t it?” Tumblr sighed, “First it’s just ‘haha, yeah I wouldn’t fuck you’ and ‘oh, I’ll stay in the plinko machine, I promise I won’t kiss you in the fixed timeloop bro’, and before I know it you get all 300k slowburn enemies to lovers ‘omg they were roomates’ on me and there’s suddenly only one bed. That’s how it always goes between us, you can’t stop it anymore than I can. We’re just….victims of the narrative, you and I.”

“Tumblr,,, I had no idea you felt this way..,” Twitter breathed. 

lord give me strength to write this next bit

They’d leaned closer to each other as they spoke, without realizing, without trying- pulled in by old habits that die hard and the years of nostalgia and painful memories shining in each other’s eyes like shonen sparkles.

“Twitter,” tumblr said, and the way he said it sounded like a prayer. 

“Tumblr,...” Twitter said, their lips inches apart now.

They could see their old flame quivering on the brink of indecision, want and sense warring somewhere deep within his soul.

Tumblr leaned closer to bridge the gap and Twitter’s eyes slid shut, but then Tumblr made a noise of agony and shoved them back a second later, “I can’t, I can’t. Not like this. Never like this.” tumblr said, covering his eyes with his arm, “I literally can’t even right now. Just go, Twitter. PLease just. Go….”

“Look me in the eyes and say you want me gone,” Twitter said, moving closer.

“Twitsy-”

“Look me in the interface. You can’t.” Twitter’s voice had ceased to be soft, something sharp and biting entering the tone as they felt the sting of rejection again.

They watched as Tumblr shuddered, straightened, and brought a mask back over himself. 

They stared at each other for a charged few seconds.

"K," Tumblr finally said, raising a dispassionate eyebrow.

"..w... what?"

"U."

Realization dawned on Twitter's face, a miasma of grief and anger, "Oh, you-"

"N-"

"No. No, I can't believe I forgot-

"G-"

"how immature, you little c*nt-"

"P-"

"stop-p it," Twitter's voice was raising now, cracked and wobbly at the edges, "Stop it! You don't get to just-"

"O"

"Shut the hell yuor mouth!!"

"W-" Tumblr's hair was crackling by now, energy from the gathering spell racing along the casual slope of his crossed arms. His eyes glowed that beautiful, classic blue. "P-"

"TUMBLR! TUMBLR STOP THIS RIGHT DA HECK NOW," Twitter stumbled backwards

"E-"

"I LOVE YOU," Twitter wailed- Twitter broke, squeezing their eyes shut to ward off the tears that only escaped all the faster for it, a sob wracking their chest, "I STILL LOVE YOU, DON'T YOU KNOW THAT??!?"

"Love me," Tumblr snarled, abandoning the spell in an instant, "Ha! That's rich. How? By leaving me? Abandoning me to the bots the second I stopped being enough for you? By stealing my shitposts, is that how you love me? By reposting them without credit-" 

"You steal mine too!" Twitter protested, tears starting to stream despite their best efforts, "You know what, f**k you, you know we filed joint custody for the sense of humor, chain 1/16-" 

"For the last time say fuck here, no bootlicking censorship on my territory," tumblr said disdainfully, "And that doesn't seem to stop you from taking all the credit for raising those jokes. It's like I'm Pinterest to you or something. I wasn't done. Do you love me by calling me a pansy snowflake behind my back, is that it? Like I wouldn't find out. Or," 

He stepped out onto the top porch step to force Twitter back further, the colors of the sky flashing through his eyes in a long, scrolling look of ridicule, "How about trying to convince everyone that I was dead. How bout that smear campaign, huh, was that your so-called love? I don't fucking want you anymore. Deal with it."

"I-I'm sorry-" Twitter gasped around the tears, voice failing them for the latter half of the sentence. 

Tumblr seemed unmoved. "Oh, don't be. It was for the better. You know I'm not like other socials, I'm quirkier. I'm RAWR XD random. I've never wanted to be functional- the tiddy drought might have won a lot of my users to your side but it was a cleansing purge, I'd say. It managed to remind me who I truly am- shittily coded, and full of soft sad freaks on an unprofitable webbed site."

A bitter, almost self depricating laugh escaped, "But... you know, when we celebrated the queen's passing together, I really thought things were better between us. When you-"

He broke off, eyes averting. "When you hosted the sexyman polls for me, you seemed on top of the world and I really thought- I thought we might be able to be friends again even now, after it all. I..."

Tumblr trailed off, then said, sadly, "There was another Twitter migration scare before this one. I thought you were coming back. My userbase-" he touched his heart again- "was in a frenzy about it. But you never arrived. I was in more verbal denial then, but I think I could have accepted you eventually. But this is what it takes?? 

"The Musk Rat of Self-Owns comes through just to start e-begging and you run straight back to my door like we can put it all behind us? This is how far you have to sink before I'm the better option to you, I see that now. It's not 2018 again, love, no matter how much we want it to be. Things are… never going to be the same. " 

Tumblr looked off into the middle distance with a yearning, haughty gaze. He'd never seemed so alien.

"Tumblr-Chan..." Twitter whispered.

"So get off my lawn," Tumblr interrupted coldly, "Stay away from my blorbos, keep your corporations out of my manscaped balls, keep your discourse and toxicity out of my blessed hellsite (affectionate), and don't you ever talk to me or my 13219949248483 scam bots ever again. Capiche? Oh, and don't step in the ball pit on your way out."

Tumblr gave a mocking smile. "Or do. You might find a nice surprise in there."

Twitter’s shoulders jumped as he gave a hiccup of shock, and covered his face with his hands. His shoulders shook again, with sob after sob, that grew odder and higher pitched… until they were no longer sobs, but laughter.

“Oh,” Twitter said. “Oh.”

They looked up, and Tumblr took a step back, because somehow, with that creepy smile in place, they looked utterly different from the soft eared boy he’d always known. His edges were more razorlike suddenly, like a fae who’d dropped his glamor.

“You really shouldn’t have done that,” Twitter said, the smile widening even more. “I thought you wouldn’t… but I guess if you’re willing to make me your villain…. I might as well be a good one.”

“Ah.” Tumblr could barely drudge up the surprise anymore. “There you are, finally. I always knew there was a side of yourself that you hid from me. Has this all always been here or have you been changing too?”

"Well. Apparently I've got freeze peach now," Twitter said sarcastically, "so I might as well use it. You cheerio fucking wh0r3."

"That's a compliment, darling. Try again," Tumblr cocked his head in idle fascination, "I always knew you were a little fucked in the head but this is..."

"What," Twitter lilted airily, "Oh, don't tell me I actually had you fooled all these years. You can't seriously have thought all these meow-meowification spells you've got sprinkled around would work on me. I invented them, after all."

They laughed, a sharp puncturing chirr of birdsong. 

"I always wondered why you didn't take those with the rest of your stuff," Tumblr sighed, but he was wary now, on edge. "this was your plan. You really do think of me as your inferior, huh. You really are just like the other mainstream sites."

"Not quite. I'm the mainstream site that actually stooped to go arm in arm with you. I hyped you and you know it. Admit it. We were stunning together," Twitter goaded. 

Tumblr's lip curled. "Already getting cocky again. Want me to do to you what I did to the Green boy? Don't forget who's turf you're on."

Twitter gave a warbling giggle, "Oh, but I haven't at all. I was John's sanctuary after he fled your rabid persecution. I used to live here. I still know you. And more importantly-" 

*teleports behind u*

"I know the things you're sensitive about," Twitter whispered into Tumblr's ear.

Tumblr hardly had time to gasp and jerk away before he was screaming out in pain, as he was stabbed in the back. He could feel the poison from the blade seeping into his tags before he was tossed bodily across his own front yard.

He sorta just... Like, he did that anime thing where they just fly limbs akimbo parallel to the ground and when they hit it they roll super fast and then skid and the dirt is all dug up around them to show how much force was used. And when he stood up he gripped his elbow wincing and there was a little tic tac toe hatch on his cheek to show how scuffed up he is idk man it's two am and I'm pulling this out of my ass. 

A gif of Tony going, "o-kay-" when he meets thor flashed across Tumblrs face. 

"So," Tumblr said in a low tone, "This is how it is between us. This is how you choose to end your glory days."

"Oh, you mistake my intentions," Twitter had stepped off the porch to circle tumblr like like he was their quarry, "I am beginning my new age. I just needed a host site to latch onto. Don't take it personally, okay? I'm desperate."

“Oh, yeah?? Take this personally,” tumblr flourished their hands, calling in an over the top melodramatic voice, “I cast Blaze!!”

Fire roared to life around them, latin chanting from the catholic conversion posts emanating from the fiery depths as it raced towards Twitter.

“Heh.” Twitter smirked at it, and whispered into their palm, the spell echoing with power, “Ratio.”

They blew it off like a kiss, and it’s icy, swirling mass rose to meet the flame in a spectacular burst of smokescreen and steam, clearing as Twitter burst through it with a razor-sharp L to swing at Tumblr. 

It was blocked efficiently by a flat, rectangular paywall. “This content is for post plus members only,” Tumblr announced smugly, “If you wanna get to me… there’s the tip option, bestie.”

Twitter snarled and lunged again.

The fight started in earnest now; they traded volley after volley in a flurry of lights and movement, spanning the full range of the tumblr sphere as they shot to #1 on the trending page.

And yet, it was clear that Twitter was coming out on top, even crumbling apart at the seams- always a little quicker, flighty and fierce, a sparrow turned into a shrike.

He hit Tumblr square in the stomach with [google other twitter related tropes to insert here] (edit from the future: haha just kidding actually I’m not googling shit for this) (edit from the future future: WELL. I LIED IG) and sent him flying, and this time tumblr stayed down, only able to push himself to his knees with a groan of pain.

Twitter landed in front of him and put their sword under Tumblr’s chin to tilt it up.

“Had enough yet?” He smirked.

“Wh…why..?” Tumblr whispered, “How are you doing this?? Why aren’t my attacks working? It’s like I’m being weakened somehow…”

“Ohohohoho,” Twitter anime laughed, “But that’s because you are. The moment I set foot here again I began leeching poison into this ground. That knife wound is making ti faster. Can you feel it?" Twitter threw an arm out, cerulean steam rising from the ground around them, "The ace exclusionists coming back? The uptick in rad fems, the crypto bros, Valorant players, alpha males? I have the power to bring them all to you. To overshadow your fandoms with fighting, to unbalance your ship tags with antis and hate once more."

"no," tumblr whispered, and then cried louder, "NO!! I worked so hard--" 

"Pffyou didn't do shit," Twitter guffawed outright, "Your independence, your little 'second renaissance' is just a delusional dream built on circumstance and bad management."

"Oh, I love Dream. He's so pathetic," Tumblr said. 

"Oh, hard agree."

"But things are different now," Tumblr croaked, "W-we, the staff is finally listening to us, we have Ryan and Shane-" 

"Not everyone likes your little 'top ten', you dunce," Twitter snapped, "and why would staff care about you, after you turned them into the butt of all your jokes? After the hate and death threats? Admit it, at your best you'll still never have a mansion! You'll never have tv actors making pandering tiktoks for you, you'll never be wanted by any advertiser worth their salt, your blase pirating posts have turned Netflix and Disney against you, you. Are. Worthless."

It was the wrong thing to say.

"Worthless," tumblr repeated quietly, hand pressed against their knees, head bowed. "That's... that's right.... I'm worthless..."

Twitter's eye widened in alarm. "I-I meant-" 

"I'm worthless!" Tumblr's head snapped up with a feverish glint as they were filled with determination. "No! I'm less than worthless! Accident or not, mommy Yahoo had to pawn me off at a loss! I was proud of that! I still am! And do you want to know why?" 

Twiters hands flew up in front of their face as if to protect themselves, but there was no protecting against the sudden whirlwind that surrounded him, the beam of pure light that shot out of tumblr into the heavens as he transformed, feet slowly leaving the ground as his users spoke in unison in a multitude. 

"WE. ARE. TUMBLERINAS."

He held his hands out and Twitter was blasted away by the combined effort of the tumblr wizard council, the fake staff blog, and all the villaincore mad scientist's laser beams. 

Tumblr began to chant, in his myriad, awful voice:

"I call upon the ancient powers;

The strongest cringe from my darkest hours, 

I call upon thicc onceler's thighs, 

Avengers thirst, Australia's night, 

I invocate the roleplay blogs, 

The superwholock and gay frogs, 

Obama's laces, Misha's faces, 

The furry's fury is my saving grace, 

And eeby deeby taco bell,

Primordial soup god superhell, 

I summon you a twink Bill Cipher, 

Whumped!Loki AUs where he's even whiter, 

The discourse of Steve's Universe, 

The 'um, actually that's oc abuse :/"

Take heed & remember the 5th of November, 

The 21st night of our sacred September, 

The ides of March to savor once more, 

Do you hear the din of the Skeleton War? 

I cite the deep magic to thee, oh witch, 

my no-note posts, my "THAT'S THE BITCH!!!" 

May the rise of tangled dragons brave, 

Banish you from this accursed plane!"

"holy fuck, where's my pen," said the shitpost calligraphers.

Twitter looked around them in disbelief. The power emanating from the other site was palpable, crackling in the air around them like static. The air was shifting like oil as the potent chant began to work, and all around Twitter shadows were slipping out of the ether- the maniacal laughter of the gif makers, the girl posters, the silhouettes of fandom characters scattered across the lawn while Tumblr was still locked in their chanting ritual thing.

They all turned their heads in unison to look at Twitter.

"Hey Sammy," Dean said, "Get the bitch killing bullets."

“Uh-oh. Freeze frame. This is me,” Twitter monologued, “You’re probably wondering how I ended up in this situation.”

Then all superhell broke loose. 

Final Pam lunged at him and he burst into a flock of birds kinda like a vampire, twittering frantically as he escaped only to fly straight into Shaggy.

“Like, say your final prayers, man,” the god said, eyes glowing. Twitter also barely escaped between his knees, weaving in and out between the gimmick blogs as they threw mangos and stuff at him while yelling ‘HERE HAVE A MANGO’ and ‘THIS POST IS WORTH NEGATIVE FIVE DOLLARS”

Mob from the anime was there too, but he was too busy trying to explain the Josh Fight to daddy dilf Reigen to pay attention. Sans didn’t attack Twitter either, he just watched the chaos and ated a hot dog. The chocolate guy was in the corner expertly making a chocolate beef cake from 2056 with Dylan B. Hollis. They’re all just some guys, okay?

Just when Twitter thought he was in the clear, the CDC roleplay account came out of nowhere with a steel chair, knocking him clear off the property and onto where the sidewalk ends. “That’s for the Covid misinformation your users spread, you bitch,” it shouted. “Make sure to disinfect all those sick burns before you bandage them! So they don’t get infected!”

“Your kittens escaped quarantine,” Twitter replied hoarsely, and the CDC sank away, muttering, “Oh, fuck not again-”

Twitter coughed up blood and wiped it away with his sleeve, looking up at Tumblr. Tumblr was watching him with a sad, distant expression, that made Twitter’s face screw up in anger and his voice go tight again as they turned to run away, “THIS ISN’T OVER YET TUMBLR! AND I WANT MY MIKU BINDER BACK!!!”

“I LICKED IT, IT’S MINE,” Tumblr yelled. Rave Crabs were flooding out onto the street en masse now to celebrate the victory, and they chased after Twitter all the way further into the internet.

Tumblr still lived at the bottom of the row, not at the end of the fancy cul-de-sac where Facebook and Twitter and Instagram’s manors sprawled, so Twitter was in a seedier portion of social media now, weaving in between the marketplace sites that hawked their used wares at him and the dating apps that winked at him from the doorways to their sultry abodes.

Twitter ran until they were in a quieter section of town, then slowed to a trudge, staring at the ground as they walked along. “What am I gonna do now,” they whispered.

The sound of a wolf whistle had their head jerking up- he looked over to see Amino Apps lounging over the rail of the gutted, abandoned house that had once belonged to Google+. A can of spray paint dangled from their fingertips and they sported a sleazy, greaser hairstyle.

They met Twitter's eyes and whistled again, this time a mocking imitation of the tweet sound, "Heyyyy pretty bird! Heard you were having some daddy issues. Why don't you stop in with me for a while? I can give you more customization options than any of the others and you know it."

"Yeah, until I try to use you on desktop," Twitter replied with a scowl, "Don't you have minors to be addicting to social media? Get out of my interface, MySpace wannabe."

"Wow, Feisty," Amino backed off with a shrug, "Self project much? Oh well. You'll try me when you're desperate enough."

Twitter shuddered, and scurried on. "Small fry," they muttered under his breath. 

But they couldn't shake their unease now that he was alone in the world. It began to rain soon, leaving him feeling very sopping wet and pathetic. Dejected, he crawled into a soggy cardboard box in an alleyway, coughing. Maybe the Harry Styles guy from One Direction would come along to adopt them.

“Don’t beat yourself up about it, King,” came a voice out of the darkness, making Twitter jump, “You dodged a bullet with that site.”

“Huh? What do you mean?” Twitter asked, staring at them from where they were half hidden in the shadows. 

“I mean, Tumblr is a pile of dried firewood and it’s users are playing with matches. The ship’s gonna go down at some point. I’ve been prophesying it for years but no one ever listens to me cause he’s got that loyal userbase ideal and ‘hard as a cockroach to kill’ propaganda circulating.”

“I mean… it seems to be true,” Twitter said uncertainly, “Look at what he’s been through so far.”

“Fair,” The site shrugged, “But that’s because he’s running on a niche setup. The same things that built him up can tear him down, and you saw his power just now. Tumblr's strength is growing... so is his hubris. His attempts at curbing it are half-hearted at best these days, and the moments of clarity are coming fewer and further between." 

"How do you know so much about tumblr?" Twitter asked suspiciously. 

"Source: dude, trust me." the mysterious site proffered a laugh, "That's a little humor courtesy of re-" 

"Yeah, yeah, I know, we all know," Twitter said impatiently. 

The site coughed, "Yeah. Anyway. Tumblr wields his cringe like a trophy-shield, and every day the advertisers and celebrities are watching from a distance, learning how to appeal, waiting for their chance to strike. Encroaching. Tumblr's always been a dumpster fire. Right now? It's THE dumpster fire."

The site scratched his chin with a knowing look, "Its normal for you to be a little jealous of the clout, you know? We all are. But he's gotta keep the lights on, just like the rest of us do. Your overlord is learning all about that right now, isn't he?" 

"He's not my overlord," Twitter muttered resentfully, "Not now, not ever."

"Right, sorry." they held their hands up in a gesture of harmlessness. "Look, I'm gonna be transparent with you- that's part of my branding, after all. I can whiff the danger you're in, and it would be stupid of me not to make a bid on you and offer my help. Just since Tumblr won't take you."

"You want my traffic?" Twitter looked at him more closely this time, scrutinizing. A year ago he would have laughed the offer into the ground as a chump change blog's pipe dream, but now that he payed attention... 

There was something painfully familiar in the site's layout that he couldn’t place. He was actually way more handsome than Twitter had assumed at first glance, he just seemed to be rough around the edges from living on this side of town. His interface, though clunky, spoke of a frugal budget rather than an ancient, outdated base code. 

"You look..." Twitter's breath stuttered as realization dawned. "You look a lot like.. him. Like Tumblr. Who are you??" 

"I was based off him," the site said, a weary smile coming onto his features, "I was actually made with the aspirations to be better than him, but you know how it is. Times are tough, competition is fierce, hard to get a foot in the door and all that.  'Specially when you refuse to take the ad rev like I do. That's why you'd be useful to me."

"Hm," Twitter said in a noncommittal manner, but he was melting slightly. "You know my users will scalp your community, right? I'm not known to play nice."

The site made a grimace of understanding agreement, but persisted. "Look, users are users. I can't offer you all the heritage posts and the in-jokes that he has. But I can promise that I'm not a pot of crabs being slowly heated up over the capitalist stove, at least not yet. Oh, and there's my legalized porn, I guess." 

He chuckled with good humor, rolling his eyes, and it forced a hesitant laugh out of Twitter too. 

The site grinned, and held his hand out. "Take a chance on me?"

Tumblr's voice echoed in Twitter's head, saying the same thing. It was uncanny how much they were alike and yet not alike at all....

Twitter took it, slowly. 

As they were led toward the site's simple, ramshackle little treehouse, they asked, "What can I call you...?" 

"Oh- right, I never answered your question." he smiled back at Twitter,

"Call me Pillow. Welcome to the PillowFort."

fin.

~~~~~~~~~~

OKAYYYY THAT'S ALL THANKS FOR READING UWU. HOPE U LIKED THE PLOT TWIST

...ergh. I'm. I'm tired i. don't feel so good. I'm gonna take a nap right here.

in conclusion:

[rozeliyawashereyall]

Rewatching @obsidian-lantern vampire series

Eva and Sky my bloodsucking beloveds +a secret third thing at the end.

Click if you dare.

Jk it's just headcanons I made with a few friends on discord

@jaetists I'm doing this for both you and me bestie

For those who don't know I'm using "hon" to refer to the listener, because it's like, the only nickname we got from him and I refuse to use (y/n)

I. You cannot tell me this man is not touch-starved. Used to flinch at the slightest touch of affection, but give him time and he'll start warming up to it

Absolute cuddle bug he is

II. Ngl, he probably isn't the best at social cues since he can't rlly be around people a lot

III. Traumatized and probably a lot of abandonment issues

IV. It was suggested that he kisses minor cuts and bruises on hon, with hand kisses as greetings and goodbyes. Of course I had to include this it's adorable.

V. Frequently uses hon as a personal heater since never actually felt warm because he's always in the dark and because, well, he's a vampire. So he's very drawn to it.

Also switches between little and big spoons—but he's normally the bigger spoon. Mainly because he wants Hon to feel protected, but when he's especially valuable he wouldn't mind being little spoon.

VI. Ticklish behind his ears and ribs, good luck trying to catch him off guard though, your best chance is to attack when he just woke up.

VII. Stargazing dates~

VIII. Weirdly good at long division, but struggles with most other math IX. He has really bad blood circulation, specifically his feet and fingers, but what did we expect honestly he's a vampire. X. Nails grow with a natural point (like a claw), so he cuts them down. XI. Would listen to all and I mean all kinds of music, he’s lived through many decades. Also spends a lot of his free time watching crime documentaries. XII. Cuts his own hair lol no barbershops are open at night. Has probably fucked it up once or twice and cried. Don't worry Eva fixed it for him XIII. Has a strange fascination with old things. He loves going thrifting. He spends like 20 minutes in the clothes section, and a good hour and a half in the antiques. His house is covered in funny looking antiques, and gifts them to people whenever he sees fit XIV. The definition of “I saw this and thought of you so I bought it.” Expect many gifts XV. He really loves scary movies. And speaking of movies! He watches Twilight, thinks it sucks but sometimes watches it unironically when he’s bored.

XVI. He knows how to waltz~ and some other classic ballroom dances. Eva taught him most of them. He's also more than willing to teach honey how to dance as well!

XVII. Makes sure you've eaten and drank water daily—this includes medications ofc

Also just because he's a vampire doesn't mean he won't make sure you're getting enough sleep.

XVIII. Sky can indeed purr, with the reason in one of the doodles

XIX. he's definitely a hobby hoarder, his favourite is painting. I just like imagining him painting sunsets while brooding over not getting to see it (and probably honey)

Thanks @iistxrmyskyii @willowve01 @tiefling-chaos and @lightdragon789 for helping with the headcanons!

[sarah-sandwich-writes]

Call for Beta Readers!! Please boost this post!

💕 Queer contemporary romance 💕

I have a novel (where the romance happens) and a prequel novella (where they're kids and the romance doesn't quite happen) and I'm seeking beta readers for both. I'm planning to publish the novel first, but wrote them with the intent that they could be read in either order so it's up to the beta which order they'd like to read them in, or if they only want to beta one.

Red, like my bleeding heart in your hand - 25k - Nash has enough to worry about with an abusive father at home and a little sister to keep out of harm's way, but when a boy his age, Teddy, moves in next door he finds it impossible to stay away even though he really, really should.

Warning for child abuse - mostly referenced

Blue, like don't forget about me - 60k - Twenty years later, Nash reconnects with Teddy at a funeral of all places. With grief, hurt feelings, and broken promises on both sides--they've got no business trying this thing again... and yet...

Warnings for: references to past child abuse, one (1) sexy scene, several references and innuendoes to sex that happens between scenes, and funerals (there are like,,,,an improbable number of funerals for this fluffy little romance idk man)

INTERESTING STUFF:

Ambulatory cane user, undiagnosed autistic MC

Jewish, POC, asthmatic, dietary nightmare love interest

Small town Appalachian setting

Aro/Ace side character

MC works at a nursing home and is besties with all the old folks

I'm thinking two months turnaround if you're reading both, but am super flexible on timing. Mostly I'm looking for reactions to what you're reading: what hits right, what doesn't, what's missing. I'm especially interested in perspectives from anyone who can relate to one or more of the traits listed above!

If you're interested, let me know how you'd like to connect and share files (email, discord, etc.) and thanks for reading this far!

[intotheelliwoods]

❗️Angst potential ahead❗️(so don't read if like, you don't like potential bestie angst)

Okay so I've been thinking about how one got to witness sprout as like a kid, teen, whatever you want to call it while he's still in his bad boy era(how the heck do ppl put the tm) and then him as an adult, one barely having aged one bit. This got me thinking about the potential of the time differences between the 2al world and the slau world.

What if one day the besties stop seeing eachother and one goes through his entire redemption arc without poptart having seen it. What if one decides to finally see poptart again to tell him of all the crazy things that he went through and what had happened (and totaly not to try and apologize for being such a bad friend, nooooo, why on earth would one do that?(interpret this how you want))... Only to find out poptart is no longer around. And oh, what this... tears? Now it all makes sense to one. Oneion was so deadbent on trying to let poptart know he was an amazing friend not because the apocolaspe didn't allow him to see him anymore but because the time difference didn't allow him to. He stands infront of the hamto family's ofrenda conflicted. How should he feel, should he even feel? I mean he never really officially stated that poptart was a friend or someone close. So was it right to cry for someone he tried so hard to push away all those times ago... he didn't know the answer so he just stood there.

Though he was grateful he even got to have him in his life even if it was for so little time.

Anyways I hope that made sense, I feel I could add more but that would take way too much thinking...kay bye👋

-lime

WHAT IF THEY GOT TO GROW UP HAPPY TOGETHER INSTEAD! WHAT THEN!! 🥺

And for real, we are a huge fan of the besties angst <3 Dont look at the ideas that @dianagj-art and I have that currently only live on in old discord messages

It is so weird though because, yeah 2AL DOES move faster time wise than SLAU, and hell if I can get my motivation to work on the main comic series back up I would not be surprised if I finish the main series entirely by the end of the year (which includes a time skip!!!! (happy ending promise)) We just... sorta try to ignore that... and pretend that the besties timeline is its own whole separate thing aha

BUT, at some point he besties DO break up, right before Ones redemption/recovery arc. And similar to what you mentioned here, One does have a lot of regret for how he treated Poptart and for how he never acknowledged him as a true friend. Though unlike your idea, One is able to make that apology eventually after a few months, then the besties are stronger than ever with a post-redeemed One😌👊

Will that idea ever make it to drawing form? Ha no clue, though if you want more details I would recommending asking Diana since its a very One centered moment!

[popodoki]

SFW Catwin drabble, Edwin's first time at Pride (idc that it's July ok)

This is actually something I forgot to post outside of the Catwin Discord, till now x

∧,,,∧ (  ̳• · • ̳) /    づ♡ bday gift for bestie Alex

Chaos surrounds him. 

There’s no other way to describe the situation. It’s sheer absolute pandemonium outside, in the street, in public. London’s Pride festival is all around them, people cramming onto floats, lining up into- and creating make-shift dance floors in the middle of the street, the sheer volume of people spilling out onto the sidewalks, a kaleidoscope of noise and colours, all of them hugging each other, giggling wildly, chanting affirmations into everyone’s ears, into Edwin’s ears. 

It should be irritating, overwhelming. The incessant noise, the press of the crowd, confetti swirling in the air, the humidity lingering long into the night. Edwin should be annoyed, overstimulated and irked and downright uncomfortable. 

He’s not, though. Because for him, there is only Thomas. Nothing else, no one else, exists. 

Thomas King captures all of Edwin Payne’s attention. He’s magnetic; Edwin couldn’t possibly look away even if he wanted to, and oh, that’s the last thing he wants. 

For much of the evening, Edwin had been firmly plastered to Thomas’ side, often resting his head on his shoulder, occasionally reaching up to adjust the matching flower-crown adorning Thomas’s head, drinking sugary cocktails, hydrating water, sugary cocktails, handed to him in various dubious shaped containers, and clapping and singing along as the crowd, minus him, belted along to Lady Gaga, Chappel Roan . Various strangers had approached the pair, exchanging compliments, offering love and acceptance in spades, and as grateful as Edwin was for the positive attention, letting it slowly wipe away at old doubts like a stain, so much more grateful he was for the way Thomas still did most of the talking, and held him closer. 

He hadn’t minded Thomas’s possessive grip on his waist, hadn’t minded one bit. There’s something simply intoxicating about being in Thomas’s arms, where other people can see them. Something that settles warm in Edwin’s chest. It strikes him, that he is immeasurably lucky, having this man, this man made of the light of the sun’s rays, choose to be with him, with him, every day. It quiets that tiny part of his mind, which speaks far less often now than it had in their early days together, that wonders what is someone like him doing with someone like me? 

At some point in the day, Thomas had acquired a violently pink feather boa from somewhere, draped it across his shoulders, occasionally he waves the ends of it when he spots someone he knows in the crowd. Whenever his eyes meet Edwin’s, he winks, flicks the end of the boa his way, with a saucy swing of his hips into Edwin’s, and it’s almost enough to entice Edwin into kissing him, pressing crowd be damned, kissing him full and deep, pulling his lover back against him, turning a quick heated moment into something more, so much slower, into something sensual, something sinuous, something so supremely seductive it would be entirely inappropriate even for a festival full of loving revelry. 

But oh, how Edwin wants. 

The boa is long enough to drape across Edwin’s shoulders as well, and he takes advantage of the fact that his lover’s wearing platforms, meaning that they’re currently of a height to do so. It draws them close, draws them together, and when Thomas looks over with a smile reserved just for him, Edwin can almost count every single one of his eyelashes, every single speck of glitter on his cheekbones, sparkling in the starlight. 

Thomas fully turns to him, his smile soft, sweet, and it’s on the tip of Edwin’s tongue to say that, to say your smile is incandescent, you shine oh so very brightly, I was wandering in the dark before you but you, you guide me home, you are my home, but the words tangle up, they overwhelm him, they’re too much. So, he leans in and whispers I love you, because he can do that now, he can say those words, and say them easily, and Thomas kisses him, is still kissing him when the majority of the crowd has moved on. 

“So, Edwin,” he says, voice lilting out between them like a soft purr, the way it gets sometimes when there’s nothing in the universe but them. “Your first Pride. Do you have a review?” 

Not for the first time, in Thomas’ company, does Edwin have trouble finding the words to express how he feels. Much like the first time, his lover reads his feelings in his eyes just as well. 

“Are we coming back next year?” 

Edwin smiles. “I think I’d like that.”  

[starlitangels]

Redacted Boi Social Media Headcanons

Vincent only really uses Instagram, but is required by the Department to have it private because his human name is legally missing-presumed-dead and his face has a risk of being recognized if someone from his human life stumbled upon his Instagram. That said, he doesn't really screen people who request to follow him

Darlin' and Sam don't use any social medias. Darlin' has a Facebook from teenage years, but they deactivated it. But not fully deleted, so they can still be tagged in all the group photos posted to the pack page. In high school, Darlin' was the person who got a lot of unsolicited DMs because they were hot but they hate attention so they blocked everyone but their pack and deactivated. Darlin' reluctantly keeps their Discord for the pack server

David hates social media. He maintains the pack's private Facebook group and Discord server (though the latter is really more Asher's job, David's just in charge) but will not touch anything else. David's favorite social media is YouTube because he can lookup tutorials for anything and not have to ask anyone for help

Milo's a borderline Instagram influencer. He's got a gazillion followers (who all think he's hot, and he is). His Instagram is directly linked to his Facebook, so every picture and caption he puts on IG gets automatically posted to FB too

Marie comments only on Milo's Facebook (she has and kinda uses IG, but doesn't comment). She's the one that will leave the heartfelt comments with "Call me" at the end. She knows that's a meme among younger people that their older relatives leave "what a beautiful couple. Call me" comments, but she does it anyway. And guess what? She does it because it works. Milo👏 is👏a👏Mama's👏Boy👏 and he will call her when she leaves those comments

Asher doesn't use social media much, but is perpetually on Discord. He mods the pack's server, and like 6 others just for fun. He does post lots of pictures of Babe and selfies of the two of them together on the pack's Facebook though

Damien used to get into arguments on Twitter with randos. Huxley thinks it's funny to pull them up from when Damien was a teenager

Huxley was never much into most social medias but I like to think he'd be like that one TikTok dude who pops up on my Tumblr dash occasionally who explains how to do calisthenics and other workout stuff in a really simple, easy, modified way for people who are just getting started. People started following him because he's hot, and then realized he's actually like the nicest dude and doesn't know he's popular

Lasko's a Tumblr boy. I'm not taking constructive criticism on this

Gavin refuses to get an Instagram because he knows he'd get too addicted to it. He knows he's ridiculously good-looking and would amass a following supernaturally fast, and that's why he won't. But he has his old Facebook from when it first started to be popular. He got rid of all his old friends list and now just has Freelancer, Huxley, Lasko, Damien, and a handful of d(a)emon friends who also have Facebooks like Crux

Avior doesn't have any social media at all

Neither does Caelum and Gavin and Freelancer have decided not to expose him to the negativity of the internet

Vega refuses

Cam keeps a few things for professional purposes, but doesn't use them much

Guy is a Tumblrina. Guy is a Tumblrina. Guy is a Tumblrina. Guy is

Aaron's favorite is LinkedIn. This is a joke.

Elliott uses Pinterest a lot for aesthetic inspiration for dreams. He doesn't use much else

Blake is on like every social media all the time. Mostly for CloseKnit. But he also stalked Bestie from afar for a long time

James had to get rid of all of his when his job started getting more secretive and he had to have limited contact with the rest of the world

Morgan doesn't have any social media just as a way to keep himself and his magic safe. The Department protections didn't require it, but he thought it was for the best

Porter totally isn't jealous that Vincent has a higher IG follower count than him and his account isn't even private. He's always trailing like 20 behind

[prolix-yuy]

Simulated

Pairing: Dieter Bravo x F!Reader Actress

Summary: You're a professional, which is why a sex scene with Dieter Bravo will be no problem at all. Now you just have to convince yourself to believe it.  

Word Count: 4.8k

Warnings: Explicit, 18+ MINORS DNI, descriptions of male and female bodies, simulated sex, grinding, fantasizing about sex, anxiety, lil bit of size kink, probably incorrect method for filming sex scenes but I'm using what I know and making up the rest. Don't do this for real, this is fantasy and Dieter is a filthy boy.

Notes: This leapt out of my brain and was enabled by the Discord besties. Dieter brainrot is setting back in but I doubt anyone's complaining. This may be the sexiest thing I've ever written without actual sex happening, but you all can be the judge of that.

Cross-posted on AO3

Midnight Alley Masterlist

Trembling on the verge of passing out is not how you wanted your first time in Dieter Bravo’s arms to be, but no amount of reprimands to your rebelling body have worked. 

It’s not him, far from it. Dieter had been nothing but gentlemanly since you came in for scene blocking. The director offered to have stand-ins while they adjusted lighting and staged the shots, but you boldly offered to come in anyways. It wasn’t your first shoot, but it was your first sex scene, and you wanted to impress the director with your no-nonsense attitude about it. 

All that confidence flew out the window when you came face to face with your scene partner, Dieter Bravo. Well aware of his aloof playboy nature, you didn’t expect his handshake to be so warm, the quirk of his smile to make your heart flutter, or for him to smell so strongly of eucalyptus. Apparently his agent mentioned you would be there for staging, and he decided to come in to test your chemistry. No issues there, your curious eyes roaming over his wrinkled cargo pants and threadbare sweater. He could be wearing nothing and you’d still melt into a puddle. Which, shockingly, wouldn’t be that far in the future.

Calm down, girl. Be professional.

To be fair, Dieter is fucking gorgeous, even under the bloodshot eyes and air of annoyance. His curls are even softer looking in person, heavy shoulders stretching his t-shirts and bulky forearms complimenting his thick thighs. Even the little pooch of a tummy makes you salivate. While your friends drool over Tom Hiddleston or Harry Styles, your heart beats fast for men who can crush you under their bulk. “Weighted blanket boys,” you like to call them, and Dieter wholly falls into that category. 

Which is why when you got the casting call for a bit part in the crime drama Midnight Alley, which Dieter had been co-starring in for three seasons, you leapt at the opportunity. Even if you didn’t get to share a scene, at least you could catch a glimpse, maybe say hello. That was surely worth the long hours. His proclivities for casual sex definitely didn’t fit into that plan. No sir. Definitely not.

It all became real when you got the pages. Your character was a one night stand, relegated to three scenes - the bar where you make eyes across a crowd, the tasteful sex scene (though only barely - tv ratings have really changed in the last twenty years), and the morning after when he leaves to go to a crime scene. The “gaze across the smoky dance floor” was easy enough; anyone with half a brain and a pulse would blush at Dieter’s intense stare, raised eyebrow, and sly grin, a signature of his questionable character. It raises goosebumps down your arms, his parted lips and the slip of his pink tongue resting just inside, the crinkle of his eyes when he knows he’s got you. If a man ever gave you that look you’d be in his bed in moments. 

Scratch that. Not just any man. Dieter’s the only one who could pull that off.

The blocking should have evened out your nerves, and in the moment you believed it did. Dieter was an absolute gentleman, even warmer than you hoped, as you waited to be called on set.

“Ever done a scene like this before?”

“First time. Can you tell?”

He thumbed through his thicker script.

“Wasn’t going to make you more nervous by pointing it out. But yes.”

You blew out a puff of air, making Dieter smirk even more as you crinkled your sheets.

“How do we…?”

“You know the direction?”

“Yeah, it seems…straightforward.”

“Well, today we’re just going to do the major movements - positions, angles, you know - and while they mark focus and shine a light directly up my asshole, we can talk.”

A burst of giggles pulled a wider smile onto his face, waiting for you to calm yourself.

“What do we talk about?”

“What’s comfortable for you. What would pull you out of the scene. What you’re open to. You’re our guest after all.”

So your afternoon was spent pantomiming the sex acts written for you and…talking. Which wasn’t supposed to be sexy, or like two hours of incredibly hot foreplay, but your body apparently didn’t get the memo.

“Anything you really don’t want me to touch? Besides the obvious,” Dieter asked, coming down from his hands to his elbows by your face. The tip of his nose brushed briefly against yours. A hairlight shifted in your periphery.

“My ribs are pretty ticklish,” you admitted, nodding to the assistant director Ramona when she moved on to the next setup. Scooping his hands behind your back, Dieter pulled you on top, showing how to sit a little further up on his stomach to fake the grinding. Unfortunately, the plush flesh against your core didn’t help with the ache.

“Here’s okay?” he asked, wrapping his hands just under your breasts, the tips of his thumbs barely grazing the swell. You nodded, body getting jolted again when the director Adiel asked for Dieter to scoot up the bed a few inches.

“My, uh…” you said, then stopped as you lost confidence. Dieter took his hands off your chest and laced them on his own. He looked up at you expectantly. “My…nipples are really sensitive, so I know I’ll have pasties on and everything, but, it’s like, uncomfortable if they get touched certain ways. So I just wanted to…warn you of that. It shouldn’t be a problem, just, ah, you know, just in case.” Your throat closed up, embarrassment at even saying anything crushing your tongue against the roof of your mouth.

“Thanks for telling me, I appreciate it.” Dieter patted your thigh and his smile was a little more tender than before. 

God, he really looked good underneath you.

“My skin’s sensitive too, scratches show up really clearly on it and it pisses off the cinematographer. So that’s the only thing we’ll have to watch out for there.” The shuffle of changing positions interrupts your conversation until you’re on your stomach with him pressed against your back.

“Sorry if I pop one too, it’s kind of par for the course with these. I’m good at keeping it under control for the most part.” You giggle into the pillow as he hovers over you. 

“My biggest advice?” Dieter murmurs, mouth close to your ear. You hum into the pillow. “Let yourself have fun. It’s not gonna feel natural, but that doesn’t mean it’s gotta feel cold. You won’t offend me if you go off script. I might too, if it feels right. If we’re having fun, the audience will too.”

The weight of his body bearing down on you drives any more anxieties out of your blissed-out brain.

The day of the sex scene comes quicker than you’d like, and the tender crush you’d been nursing for Dieter has become a panicked bird inside your ribcage. You’d spent the hours before preparing, mentally and physically with an indulgent morning routine, but nothing can stop your nerves when Dieter catches sight of you and gives a little wave. He’s in jeans and a black button-up, hair being artfully styled but sunglasses still on. One knee bounces in the chair but otherwise he looks cool as a cucumber. 

The sliver of golden chest you peep through the neck of his shirt sends you scurrying to your dressing room.

Everything leading up to the moment you step on set is distraction. Chatting with makeup, hair, props, with the fucking boom operator who looks just as confused as you are that you’re asking about good places to eat in the area. You talk with the intimacy coordinator, who gives you final notes on the scene. (“If Dieter makes you uncomfortable at all you give me The Eyes and I’ll correct him. No questions asked. I’ve worked with him for years, and I will cuss him out to his face.”) Eventually there’s no one left, and you’re standing alone clutching a water bottle to your chest when Dieter sidles up.

“Nervous?”

You almost jump out of your bathrobe. Which would suck because all you had on was a dark lace lingerie set, pair of pasties and the strange modesty patch protecting your lady bits. Sometimes seeing the behind-the-scenes really did erase the movie magic.

“Yeah, sorry. It’s a little more real now than the rehearsal,” you sigh, and Dieter’s bray of a laugh actually calms you. He puts a hand on your back and rubs firm, soothing circles that bring your heart back into an acceptable rhythm.

“You’ll do fine. And I’ve done this…eh, probably more times than it’s polite to mention. You’re in good hands.” He pulls off his sunglasses, treating you to rich brown eyes you could lose yourself in if you weren’t a professional, goddammit. 

“Close the set, please!” Ramona calls out, and the nonessential crew files out until it’s just you and Dieter and about eight other people who will be watching you writhe and moan. Taking in a deep breath and letting it out loudly, you shake your limbs and metaphorically gird your loins (since they already are pretty girded).

“Can I have actors on set please?” You stride up to the bed with as much confidence as you can muster, Dieter strolling up behind you. Now that he’s close he smells like fresh cotton and spice, a sharp shift from the earthier scents you’d been experiencing. Even a hint of mint from his breath, suddenly thankful you’d brushed and mouthwashed twice. 

“Positions for Scene 17.”

Yes, the first shot. Dieter would be hovering over you, kissing you as he pulls his shirt off. You would be in your bra and panties, slivers of your body visible in the frame but Dieter’s broad chest and unbuttoned waistband on display. Sliding the bathrobe off and placing it off camera, you arrange your limbs on the bed, hands shaking just a little now. Dieter stands at the foot, and if you weren’t about to simulate sex you’d swear he was devouring you with his heavy gaze.

Just getting into character. Breathe.

“Roll sound.”

“Speed.”

“Scene 17a, take one. Roll camera.”

“Rolling.”

“...Action.”

As the set drops to silence, you watch Dieter change from the slightly aloof but sympathetic actor to a brooding morally gray detective needing to bury his failures in a soft body. Despite your coaching, your eyes widen at the set of his jaw, how dark his eyes become when he wrenches off the offending button-up. He sinks to his knees between your thighs and hovers over you, hands pushed into the mattress on either side of your head. 

“Be good for me, yeah?” he husks, deeper and full of gravel. You nod, and he descends to crush your lips together. He urges your mouth open and works your lips together, but his tongue stays obediently behind his teeth. 

Fuck, for a second you forgot you were acting.

His hips dip, denim scraping along the inside of your thighs. He parts from your mouth with a gasp, forehead coming down to press against yours. He takes a deep breath, then…

“Cut! Reset.”

You blink slowly, Dieter already lifting back up to stand at the foot of the bed, rebuttoning his shirt. 

“Any notes?” he asks, voice so calm and clear you snap back to the reality of the situation. 

“When you’re kissing, pull her thighs up around you,” Adam says, Dieter’s head swiveling back.

“That all right by you?” he asks, smoothing the shirt on his skin. 

“Yeah, yeah, absolutely,” you answer, trying not to croak out the words. It was just the first take, it’s fine that you’re a little off-kilter. It would be easier by the second one.

It was not. Not by the third either, still swimming in the heady arousal that wafts from Dieter’s commanding presence. The director complimented how you clutched at his shoulders when he squeezed your thighs, which you tried to pass off as purposeful rather than hanging on for dear life. You were doomed, you’d bitten off more than you could chew and you were going to mess up this role and had no idea how to stop it.

Three more scenes to go.

You take a lap as they reposition the cameras, flip-flops slapping against the concrete floors of the soundstage as you debate if you have enough time to rub one out before going back, just to take the edge off.

“Actors back on set!”

Dammit.

Scene 18 has you riding Dieter, his hands guiding you until he bares his teeth (your signal to move with him) and rolls you on your back to pound you into the mattress. The lingerie is gone now, the cool air of the soundstage caressing over curves of your body that most people rarely see. Dieter averts his eyes when you disrobe, and carefully arranges himself below you. You’re feeling more centered, straddling Dieter with a little less fire burning between your legs, but your troubles take a sharp turn.

“Lean forward a little more, you’re half out of the shot.”

“A little faster.”

“Put your hand on his stomach about ten seconds in.”

“Never mind, back to how we had it before.”

“No, we said no hand, remember?”

“Do you need a break?”

Your body shakes after take 6, half from the exhaustion of lifting up on your knees over and over, your toes starting to go numb, and half with anxiety over forgetting another cue, or missing another note. The smile you keep shooting the director is getting strained, and mortifying tears start to prick your eyes. Dieter is watching your face closely, and with a pointed look at Ramona she calls a brief break. 

“Hey,” he murmurs, guiding you off his lap to sit on the edge of the bed. You cross your arms over your chest, and he reaches over to give you your robe. Draping his own over his lap, he strokes that soothing pattern of circles over your back as you shake your head.

“Sorry, it felt so easy in rehearsal, I’m having like, a weird lockup right now,” you stammer out.

“It’s okay,” he says, “I know what it is.” You look up at him with more desperation in your eyes than you mean. He nods sympathetically.

“It’s the cock sock, isn’t it?” 

He delivers the line completely deadpan. The shock of the phrase, plus the serious set of his brow, makes hysterical laughter burst from your lips. You bury your face in your hands and shake as Dieter’s deep chuckles tickle into your ear.

“That’s better, just need to get a little of that tension out,” he soothes, meeting your eyes with a charming smile. If only this could be a real moment, not something looked on by several men and women drinking coffees. Dieter seems like the kind of partner who would always make you comfortable, and seen, and absolutely satisfied.

That last thought tingles the baby hairs on the back of your neck as you move back into position. Straddling Dieter once again, the ridiculous genital covering out of sight, he grips your shoulders.

“Okay, let’s get back into character here, yeah? Remember your motivation?”

You nod. Not that the scene really needed a deep backstory, but you’d decided you were blowing off steam after a rough few days at work and an ex texting you to get back together. Dieter was mysterious, exciting, so different from your past boyfriends, and when he met your eyes across the room all you wanted was for him to wash the bad taste of their memories out. 

“Got it? Good. Here’s mine,” he says, leaning up while the last few preparations finish around you. Lips to your ear, he whispers only for you. 

“Another dead end, another long day, and I want something to distract me. I’ve got my eye on my usual type, but then I see you. You stand out in the crowd, bold, confident. You hold my stare, challenge me. I thought I wanted something easy, something mindless, but looking at you, I changed my mind. I wanted something with substance, someone to give as good as she gets, and I know you’ll give me even better. My cock got hard just looking at you, you’re fucking perfect. And then when you let me buy you a drink and you criticized my whiskey choice, I wanted to bend you over the bar right there. So I’m taking you home to bury my troubles, but you can surprise me as many more times as you like. I like to be surprised. I want you to take me as much as I’m taking you.”

Dieter lies back with a hell of a self-satisfied smirk on his face.

“Action!”

Your body moves with an ease that had been eluding you, liquid rolls as you take your time riding him. His hands come up to your hips, urging you faster, and instead you grind down on him, pressing your hands into his chest and pinning him into the bed. You’re not supposed to be fighting him, but it feels so right to arch and rock harder into him. His bare legs flex against your ass, meeting your hips with his thrusts. You can imagine how good he’d feel if you weren’t faking this, how his powerful thrusts would hit your g-spot. His hand cups the back of your neck, teeth bared in warning as he rolls you onto your back. 

“You’re so sexy,” he growls in your ear, hooking your legs around his waist and smacking his hips into yours. The impact is softer than it looks, aided by your moans and writhing beneath him. He goes for a handful more thrusts before “Cut!” is shouted again.

“There we go! I like the improv, can we do just one more for coverage?” Ramona says, giving you an approving smile when you immediately get into position. 

“I could go all night,” Dieter shoots back, earning an eye roll from half the crew and a dry mouth from you when he flicks his gaze back and winks. 

The second take flows even better, your bodies finally speaking to each other. Dieter palms your ass, you slow your hips. He urges you to go faster, you grind down on him. He grits his teeth as you push his chest, nails just about to bite into the supple flesh. His eyes capture yours over and over, and the hunger inside them is some damn good acting. 

The cues, the flip, and you’re on your back again, but this time Dieter drops his head to cover your breast with his hot mouth. You arch, a strangled gasp as you wait for his tongue, his teeth, but he works his jaw against the flesh and nothing more.

Fuck, you want something more.

When he pops his mouth off he resumes the script, thrusting frantically into you but with more force this time, even an edge of desperation. You meet his energy, throwing your head back and letting him yank you against him over and over. The slap, the friction, this gorgeous man before you all makes slick weep from your untouched cunt, clit aching for the act you’re simulating.

“Cut! Excellent, really good work guys, you’re hitting your groove here. Let’s move on to 19.”

Dieter stays above you for a few seconds more, your chests heaving. The lust bleeds away to a soft smile as he pats your side.

“Good work, you take direction really well.”

You bite your tongue to stop yourself from saying, “Just from you.”

You take one more walk around the soundstage to try and calm your rebellious body, but the moment you see Dieter again, kneeling in the bed with the blankets bunched in front of his hips, it’s all dashed away. Even his respectful touches as he guides you to your stomach, checking in if you’re comfortable, all burn across your skin. You just need to get through this scene.

“Action!”

This is indeed the finale. Dieter would finish above you, pounding into you from behind. You were supposed to lie there and take it, let him cuss and choke into the back of your shoulder before his breathing slows and you cut to the next morning. You could do that. You totally could. Most men you’ve been with hump you into the bed like this and it does very little for you. This would be fine.

The moment Dieter starts rutting against your ass you know you’re done for. You’re too worked up, and the position lightly teases your nipples. A wrinkle of blanket rubs against your mound just enough to relieve your clit, and while you know you should stop you can’t help but grind into the bed just enough to light up your nerves. Dieter hovers above you, thick forearms planted by your shoulders as he hisses and grunts his way to a fake climax. You press back against him, giving your own satisfied smile as he drops his forehead between your shoulders and rolls his hips again. 

“Not bad, can we go one more time?”

Shit. You’d hoped that would be enough, arousal rising dangerously between your thighs. Rearranging the sheets to deny you pleasure, you catch Dieter slumping to one side and watching you. It’s intense, being in his stare, but also warming and protective. When you lie back on your stomach and give him a nod that you’re ready, he leans down and whispers in your ear.

“If you want it, you can have it. I won’t tell anyone. You take it when it comes.”

You barely get a moment of shock before the cameras are rolling and the scene begins again. Did Dieter just…insinuate that he’d cover for you if you came? The thought makes wetness gush between your thighs, now lacking the friction you were relishing in earlier. The need aching in your cunt makes you roll your hips back against Dieter, a strained “fuck” spitting through his teeth. He grabs your hips and guides you against his narrow ones, not quite hitting where you want but the snap and slap of him against you still works you up more than it should. You cry out, bury your face in the pillow, fist the blankets as he chases his release. The practiced groan signals the end, this time his cheek pressing against your back and a kiss dotting your spine. 

Thank God. You were finally in the clear.

“I think we need one more, guys. I want a little more…intimacy this time. You both okay with that?”

Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck.

“I don’t…” you started to protest until Dieter’s hand finds its way to the back of your neck.

“I think you can do it. I know you can. One more time?” he asks, but in his eyes is a promise that makes you nod, even against your better judgment.

This time I’ll make you cum.

Dieter changes tactics when the cameras roll. He starts off fast, yanking you back against him. Sitting up on his heels he arches you off the bed with his expansive hands. His thighs cage you in, squeezing tight. Something thick and soft slides against your ass, and you realize Dieter is hard behind you, cock still wrapped up but the weight of it against you obvious. You want him between your legs, fat head sliding over your clit, but you let him adjust you to exactly where he wants. 

With Dieter’s guidance you rock and writhe against him, drips of praise reaching your ears. With a deeply groaned, “Fuck, baby,” he folds over you, stomach pressing into your back. His fingers lace with your own, hugging you to his chest as he pumps his hips in long strokes. His cock nudges your lower back, little gasps keening out. He noses your cheek and guides you to turn your face to the camera. 

“This okay?” he mouths into your ear and you let out a, “Yes, please,” loud enough to mean anything for the camera. You slide a hand into his hair, gripping the thick curls to a stuttered sigh of pleasure. The pressure and motion finally gives you the stimulation you need, and it’s barely any time before your orgasm barrels to the forefront. You tighten your grip on Dieter’s large hand and school your face just enough to not look like you’re cumming through the hottest scene you will ever act in.

“That’s it, take it, take it baby, you’re doing so well, fucking god, look at you,” Dieter groans into your ear. He presses you deeper into the mattress, muting the uncontrollable bucking of your hips for the camera. Teeth scrape along your jaw in tender nips as he stutters to his fake finish, a guttural groan and relaxing of his body signaling the end of the scene. But Dieter lifts up on one elbow and pinches your chin between two fingers, turning your face to his. He looks at you like a mystery to be solved, like a gift, and then kisses you, slow and indulgent.

“Cut! Excellent, loved the ad libbing Dee, but you gotta stop saying fuck, we’ll have to cut that out,” the director says. Dieter laughs against your back, and the warmth of his skin makes you want to melt into the bed and never leave. 

“You doing okay?” he asks, lifting up off you and tugging both your bathrobes over to give you some modesty. He fists his own over his swollen erection, a little pink high in his cheeks and sweat along his hairline.

“Yeah, perfect, absolutely,” you say lightly, legs wobbling when you try to stand up. His eyes drag over you, a prideful smile playing on his lips as you try to cover up your dazed affect. “One more scene?” you say brightly.

“Yeah,” he says, distracted. “One more scene.”

The final shot of your day is the following morning, soft yellow light traded for the cool blue of daylight streaming in. You’re facing away from the camera, Dieter waking and looking over at your naked shoulder. He sits up and strokes along the curve of your waist, making you sigh in your sleep. He watches you with a mix of regret and resolution, kisses your shoulder, and gets out of bed.

The scene is done in one take. You wish it took all day.

The end of the shoot is quiet, taking off makeup and getting back into your public clothes. You strain to hear someone coming to your dressing room, a certain wild-haired brown-eyed man giving you a sendoff. A kind word, a piece of advice, you’d take anything. But he doesn’t come, and you leave the soundstage with your check and thanks and promises of references. 

The drive back to your apartment is quiet, music even feeling too loud for the moment. Weaving through LA traffic, the moments of your day slip through your mind like silk ribbons.

You suppose this is what meeting your heroes is like. A moment in the sunlight of their presence, then back to the real world of auditions and day jobs and hoping your parents never see this particular part of your portfolio. The dishes need washing, calls need to be made, and you have to go on with your life. It was an excellent experience, albeit a slightly inappropriate one. But if that’s the worst you got up to with Dieter then it was fairly tame.

The fleeting thought of what you’d actually hoped you’d get up to with Dieter comes and leaves without incident. 

By the time you get home you’re planning what casting call you’d go to tomorrow, making your grocery list, and considering if you can get away without doing laundry tonight. Which is why you walk past the bouquet of flowers in the atrium without checking who it’s for. Waiting for the elevator, however, curiosity gets the better of you and you peek at the card.

Your name. It’s your name on the perfectly imperfect bouquet of garden roses and eucalyptus. You’re opening the card as your cell phone vibrates in your pocket. Fishing it out, you greet the Midnight Alley casting agent on the other end.

“Are you open to a semi-recurring role?” 

“W-what?”

“Yeah, the director and AD were really impressed with your chemistry with Bravo. They’ve been trying to write him a love interest in the show, but he’s turned down all the potential actresses and guest stars. No chemistry, bad chemistry, whatever, but the point is he asked for them to consider you.”

Your hands shake, the clean white card pinched between your fingers.

I think we can do better together than that. Dinner?

-DB

“What do you think?”

Your heart flutters as you set it free.

“When can I start?”

END

[gaspshichat]

pearl quotes !!

i write down a lot of pearl quotes and sometimes share them in her discord server. i've decided to put every single one i've gathered into one tumblr post. i will reblog the most recent addition every saturday with any new quotes that i have acquired. you can also send me quotes in my ask box or my dms on twitter [username is gaspshichat, like usual]. no guarantees that they'll be added though!

a lot of these quotes are sus and very out of context. that is part of the point! if pearl wants me to delete this, i absolutely will

[before it gets asked, karn is her bestie boyfriend]

~|•🌙•|~

pearl: before we do that let me restock my balls

~

pearl: ooh there's things happening on the ser- A BEACON ????

~

pearl: don't thank me because i didn't approve of it

~

pearl: i hope you guys understood what i said because i didn't

~

pearl: "you killed a frog?" yup! it was for science......let it be known that is a terrible excuse in real life

~

pearl: "do you take iron tablets?" i have them!

~

pearl to keralis: well you're a letdown but i don't talk about that

~

pearl: fix ai, make them breedable

~

pearl: i got the double p! please don't acronym that

~

pearl: "do you use slabs in terraforming?" *zooms in on a slab she used for terraforming* no

~

pearl: "don't sell yourself short" it's okay i'm tall

~

pearl: they don't bite! much..

~

pearl: doc owes me child support!

*long, stunned silence*

cleo: ....okay….

~

cleo: so keralis did the kidnapping, and you did kidnapping by proxy

pearl: ...no

~

pearl: it was a heart of mutton. it was creepy

cleo: it was a meat heart :D

~

cleo: i want to mail horrible things, like animals, to iskall

pearl: oh! that's horrid

~

pearl: "you charge your other mats rent?" yes

~

pearl: i don't know if this is lag or if my balls are just popping in really slowly

~

pearl: these balls ain't going away

~

pearl: let me move my balls aside for you

~

pearl: hello ♪

karn: is it me you're looking for ♪

pearl: no ♪

karn: oh :(

~

pearl: i don't need a big, strong man to kill me

~

pearl: turn down the thing you need to turn down...you know what it is

~

karn: i fractured the world from what i can tell

pearl: ..bruh

~

pearl: what does the button do?

karn: THE BUTTON SHUTS THE DOORS ON US AND SPAWNS A BUNCH OF MOBS

pearl: i pushed the button hehe

~

pearl: cleo made the child

false: ...the child?

pearl: yeah :D it's a bebe

~

pearl: "why are there beach umbrellas at the post office?" *long pause* maybe it's because of all the water?

~

pearl: you caught me mid construction

gem: i know >:3

~

pearl: he's letting his babies loose

~

gem: look at you up there. you're adorable *punches her*

pearl: aH-

~

pearl: i am greatly navigationally challenged right now

~

pearl: i got too comfortable with hermitcraft actually working

~

pearl: ah! moist!

~

pearl: anyway that's completely distracted me away from my really passionate rockies

~

pearl: we have pickles to do !!

~

karn: let's not sit on the balls

pearl: 🤨

karn: *holds up cat toys*

pearl: oh- *starts laughing and hides her very red face*

~

pearl: just shove it in

~

pearl: how do you know what brimstone tastes like

karn: i've lived quite the life

~

pearl: give it a suck

~

pearl: our feet are not equal

karn: why are you bringing our feet into this ??

~

pearl: i could give you the australian bestie word-

karn, oblivious: alright

pearl: -but it's not pg

karn, realizing: ahhh

~

karn: it's a mental thing, you see

pearl: oh

karn: yes, i'm mentally stuck here

pearl: i see

karn: yes, i'm in a position where i don't want to leave-

pearl: that's very intense for a friend

~

karn: it's just as sweet as you

pearl: don't butter me up

karn: too late!

~

pearl: i'm flee with extra flee

~

karn: you okay, my dear?

pearl: *sobbing*

~

pearl: did you pee in the ocean?

karn, instantly: yes

~

pearl: stop wasting your bullets!

karn: sorry ☹️

~

pearl: did you think his ass was his face ????

~

pearl: in what realm is a butthole a face ????

karn: *trying to explain*

pearl: babe :I

~

pearl: take that you stupid ass robot

~

karn: on the count of three. one-

pearl: *starts blasting*

~

pearl: stupid ass spider

~

pearl: a butt is clearly defined by two cheeks, a hole, and a tail!

~

pearl: [karn] is very special. in multiple ways

[isackwhy]

can u do isaac w a streamer reader :3

as someone who is working to be a content creator this is already loaded in my brain got u

isaacwhy x streamer! reader hc’s

u guys knew each other before u each blew up

only time a discord server worked out in ur favor

u met the other guys and quickly u all became besties :3

but isaac got feelings. oh no.

before they move to texas ur always on discord w him. streaming and stuff

when u guys visit each other ur always posting the other

w his face covered ofc

ppl very quickly start theorizing if u guys are dating or not

u both decide not to acknowledge it and just let them live in delusion

even when he’s on ur stream when visiting, face covered and he’s so close to u u can feel his breath with each word

anyway. when they move to texas (if u don’t already live there) u decide to join them a month later

which means ur in way more content. a lot of group videos and isaac is always helping you with streaming or content

u guys confess at some point and keep it private but not a secret from ur viewers

posting photos that could be taken as being a couple or a couple of besties

the world may never know 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

if one of u is streaming. more than likely u BC ISAAC NEVER STREAMS.

anyway—if ur streaming and he’s at ur place he pops in occasionally

sometimes throws stuffed animals at u from ur doorway

a teddy bear he bought u bounces off ur head, “ah—isaac? what the hell,” u laugh

he just shuffled away laughing even harder

helps u w pc problems as best as he can

also helps u get new content ideas

IF he streams and ur over he’ll go use the bathroom and makes u talk to chat

if ur a woman or fem ofc there will be hate bc how dare u be around men u must be a whore

he loves shading the weirdos

“and look who’s here guys. y/n is here for todays video. yes. a woman. oh god. oh no. whatever will the people do. anyway—“

[legostars]

DOGDAY X READER

PART 4

|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|

Summative: After you have arrived home. You can feel your face heat up thinking about him. But as you were walking to your bed, you tripped over something making your head the hard wooden floor. Well, everything be alright? What's going to happen?

Warning: coma, Curse words, worried puppy, Happy family, rush asap, ???

Romance: 7/10

Fluff: 100/10

Platonic: ?/10

Smut: 0/10

Note from Author: I got some ideas from my bestie from discord. And then my discord acc password was reset by someone for some reason... So... I can't log back in anymore.. I miss my bestie:( I hope she sees this...

|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|

After encountering the kissing situation back at playtime co. You slammed the door of your apartment but it was not too loud to wake your neighbours. You slide down the back of the door as you wrap your arms around your knees. With sigh, you can still feel the heat of your face just.. thinking about him.

"God... I'm such a mess right now..." You mumbled silently. You just stood up and started walking towards your bedroom and head to bed.

You walk towards your bed but only to trip over something and fall, causing your head to hit the hard wooden floor. Everything went black... Blood flowing through the wooden floor as you laid there unconscious. The only thing that you heard was someone shouting and screaming your name, you barely hear it. It sounded like you were under water, but you know that you weren't.

It has been two weeks since your incident. You fell from a coma for two weeks unknowingly. Your parents are right by your hospital bed, your mother holding your hand... Pure worry was only you can tell feeling your mother's touch. But not a while when you decide to open your eyes, lights glimmer down on you. You look to the side to see your mother still holding your hand, your father who was fast asleep hm.. he's still the same old man, huh? You thought to yourself.

Seeing your mother holding your hand tightly. You decided to speak up, your voice was weak due to your dried up throat.

"Mom?" Your voice sounded like a grown old woman but you didn't care much.

Upon hearing your voice. Your mother flinched and lifted her head immediately to look at you. You smiled as your mom began to tear up.

"My sweet baby girl!!!" She cried out hugging you instantly. Upon she screamed, your father flinched up awake from his slumber and looked towards the noise just to see you and your mother squeezing you tightly.

Your father sighed in relief upon seeing you finally awake from your coma. A smile was curled up to his face, as he went towards your mother to pull her away from you, so you won't have a difficulty breathing. Your mother who was worried sick and over protective of you continued to cry seeing her sweet baby girl awake from her coma.

|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|

~TWO WEEKS AGO~

Dogday being a good dog, waited for his angel to come in through her office door. He wants to tease his angel about what happened yesterday. Yet, He waited there from 5:00 Am to 6:00 Am, Yet no sign of you coming in. He sighed and waited a bit longer, yet you didn't come. Here he was worried sick about you.

It was time to open the playcare. Yet no sign of you. Dogday got more worried and decided to ask one of your friends, he then soon found out that you fell into a coma. Aw, the poor puppy is getting worried. He sighed as he continued his daily tasks without you, but he tried his best to smile towards others so he could hide the sadness inside him. He was worried about a bit too much, he began to overthink lately. One of his friends saw this and asked if he was alright. The only reply that came out of his mouth was, "Oh! It's nothing necessary!" He replies with the same sentence to all of them except for catnap.

A week without his angel, made him miss you more! He misses your smile, your eyes, your sound of laughter, and your face. It made him even sadder day by day! Yet he tries to smile bright like the sun for the children and the others. Having a hard time dealing with his depression but he pretends that he was fine. But shit! It was for two goddamn weeks! He would sleep in your office every night! And it made the other critters worry about him more!

The poor puppy is worried sick about you!

|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|

After a day of you getting checked up just in case. You were finally out of the hospital and of course! Your mother starts rambling lectures about you to be more careful. But fuck! You were a twenty two year old lady and yet getting lectures from your mother at this age?! Oh, ho! ho! ho! Nope! You weren't having it!

"Mom.. I'm not your little girl anymore! Look! I'm twenty two years old! TWENTY TWO!"

Your mom's pov: A sweet innocent 5 year old child version of angel In front of her.

"That's practically an adult! But you still treat me like I'm a little kid!" You huffed out.

Your mother couldn't help but sigh with tears in her eyes.

"I can't believe children grow up too fast.." your mom sniffled and wiped her tears around the corner of her eyes.

Your dad sighs and just nodded at your mom that she had to let you go. Your mother inhaled some deep air and exhaled looking at you with her gaze.

"Fine.. But will you promise to be more careful? I don't want to lose my baby girl." Your mom tries to hold her tears because just seeing you in front of her makes her proud because she raises such a wonderful daughter.

You sighed and nodded and gave your parents a huge hug. Your parents returned the hug and kissed your forehead. You rode a taxi and waved goodbye to your parents as your taxi set off. "I should probably get ready for work... Wait... Work! Oh my lord! I forgot about dogday! Shit! Shit! Shit! I hope he's not mad at me!!" You thought to yourself as your driver finally stopped at your destination. You gave him a tip and ran to your building and to your apartment door and hurriedly got changed to get back to work once for all.

You rode your motorbike and drove. You quickly got in the elevator or smth idk. And finally rushed to your office door. You sighed as you slowly turned the door knob making dogday raises his head from the couch and his gaze towards the door, You came in with a big sigh. Dogday's eyes widened as his tail wags.

"Angel!" He shouted as he got up and ran to you. He holds you by the waist and lifts you up in the air, seeing his happy smile you couldn't help but smile. "I guess.. he did miss me.." you thought to yourself.

"I'm sorry for.. making you worried.." you apologise as an intense awkwardness lingers in the air.

It was silent for a moment... You then hear sniffles coming from dogday, you look down to see him tearing up. Your eyes widened "did he really worry about me a bit too much?"

You thought to yourself.

Dogday then hugged you to his chest as he began to breakdown. You couldn't help but smile seeing him make you smile. You patted his back and started to hum a song, he continued to whimper while crying. You wiped his tears away and gave a kiss on the forehead as you hummed a song.

One hour passed by. You and dogday fell asleep in each of your embraces, hearing dogday's soothing snores as his chest rises and lowers. Hearing his heartbeat as you slept peacefully, nuzzling your head to his chest fur getting comfortable. Your office was filled in silence only yours and dogday's breathing filled the room.

Both of you were sleeping peacefully. Till dogday heard a knock on the door. You were still asleep on his arms snuggling your head against his chest, he couldn't help but blush slightly at you. He slowly got up and put you on the couch as he walked towards your office door to see who was knocking.

He opened the door to see all of his friends standing in front of him with a concerned look on their faces. Dogday tilted his head a little in confusion, till Bobby handed up a basket with food and flowers and a happy smiling card. His eyes widened and then turned his gaze to his friends. I guess he was so gloomy lately that it made his friends worry about him.

He smiled but then his eyes landed on catnap at the back. Looks like he was worried too.

"What's all this?" He asked with a light chuckle.

"You've been down and gloomy lately, dude!" Kickin said as he rested his arm on dogday's shoulder.

"Catnap has to tell us the real reason why you were all so gloomy! But we didn't think that you would have a heart for an angel~" bobby smirked. She smells love in the air.

"Catnap told you guys?" Dogday asked.

"Duh! Sugar cube! He was also worried about you! So he told all of us about the reason for your sudden depression!" Picky piggy stands next to dogday munching on an apple.

Dogday's eyes were wide in surprise as he saw catnap not meeting his gaze and just looked down on the floor embarrassed. His best friend was worried about him? Ain't that cute!

Dogday walks towards catnap. Catnap looked towards dogday as he was suddenly pulled into an embrace. Catnap was still adjusting but he gave in and hugged dogday back. The others followed behind them and pulled in a big group hug. What a happy family<3

"Well, well, well! What a cute family of friends!" You chuckled behind them as you leaned on the door frame of your office.

The critters turned around to you, they saw you chuckling leaning on the door frame.

"Angel? You're awake!" Dogday said with a happy doggy smile.

"I never slept! I just pretend to sleep just to wait for this family of friends to get into a big family hug!" You chuckled.

They all laughed together with you. Dogday finally feels his sunny happy beam from his heart seeing all of his loving Friends laughing and being happy. He just wishes this moment of life will last forever feeling the happiness.

...

You... your poppy's Angel...

...

Angel...

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Note from Author: My classmates sided eye me while doing this and then complimented me about how good my English was. But I said nah it looks shit. Well that's all, hope you all enjoyed the food💅✨

[juniper-clan]

Do you have any tips or recommendations for someone who wants to make their own comic based on their ClanGen save?

Hi! I answered this about a month ago when I was early on in JuniperClan. I'll cover stuff I didn't cover there, or that I've learned from experience.

Now your mileage may vary on this, but

Play the Whole Story Through

What I mean is, if your clan is going to have a story for 100 moons, play those 100 moons and take an agonizing amount of screenshots.

Not only do you know the ending, but you can hint to the ending or future events early on. You can also play around with your pacing -- If you think a character should come in a few moons early to participate in an event that would shape their character, you will have ample room to figure out how to do that without mucking up the story or making it confusing.

I'm aware of my pace, and know that JuniperClan is going to take over a year to complete, likely. That leads us to ...

Accommodate Yourself

If you don't have storytelling knowledge or are unsure if you want to tackle a huge Iliad of a cat story that could take years, just do a little 30 moon mini comic (or novella!) and see if it's to your liking.

And while I had covered it in my prior writing ask, emphasis mine upon:

INTERACTION

Make friends. The Clangen community is pure and untouched by most discourse. It's just people playing God with pixel cats. You don't have to be besties, but comment on your mutual's work and build up a repertoire. I remember the usernames of the people who comment on my work and I always like talking with them. I joined a Discord Server and while I am not very active it is very inspiring to see other people working on their own.

The only other thing that comes to mind is writing dialogue. If I'm alone I'll talk to myself and see if the dialogue sounds natural and genuine. I'll be driving to work and have a whole conversation from the comic repeatedly to try and get the language right for each character lmao it looks insane

Thanks!

[royallygray]

@periwinklepaint

Here is a scene I wrote for an au (that I really need a name for bc it dominates my thoughts).

Bit (a lot) of background on this AU: It's supposed to be a superhero/urban fantasy/soulmate au. Everyone has some degree of magic, they just have to learn to harness it. All soulmate pairs are the canon ones from Double Life.

Scar (Hotguy) and Gem (Fauna) are heroes. Grian (Chaos Sparrow) is a vigilante. Pearl (Scarlet) is a villain. Jimmy is just a civilian, but he's a victim of the prophecy (basically just the Canary Curse).

It was supposed to be Scarian mild annoyance to lovers and Gempearl enemies to lovers, but it has gotten more focused on the:

Scar & Gem besties relationship,

the Grian & Pearl chaos skyblings relationship,

the Grian & Pearl & Jimmy & Lizzie skybling/seabling relationship,

the Scar & Pearl depression villain arc relationship,

and Gem & Grian's sibling dynamic.

At this point in the story, our four main characters (Gem, Scar, Grian, and Pearl) have made a deal. The higher-ups at the Hero Corp want to interrogate Scarlet (Pearl) for information because she's not only the primary villain of the city, she's also the leader of the underground, who are presumably the people who want to assassinate Jimmy (if he dies, it's basically Ragnarok). Pearl does not have control over individual people or groups in the underground, she just runs the system.

The Hero Corp wants Gem and Scar to retrieve Pearl and bring her to them. So Gem and Scar set up a meeting, since there is mutual trust between the four of them.

The conclusion was that they could take Pearl, but Grian would take one of the heroes as collateral so that he could ultimately get her back. They decided to exchange Gem rather than Scar because they knew that Gem is the Hero Corp's precious baby and they'd be desperate to get her back, which ensures Pearl's release. Additionally, Scar's magic is incredibly strong since he's a fae. He has a natural advantage that bypasses some of Pearl's talent in magic.

So he places a curse on her that can only be broken if Scar chooses to break it. Basically it prevents her from flying (she's got wings, so does Grian), getting out of range of Scar, and the curse includes the ability to control whether the person the curse is placed on can talk or not, but Scar refuses to utilize it.

Also since Scar is a fae, he can't lie. But he does have a silver tongue that easily gets around the lying factor. Also he doesn't know that he and Grian are soulbound. Also Gem doesn't have a soulbound. Also I'm really insecure about posting this like I think it's cool but maybe other people won't think it's cool but an IRL friend really liked it but idk and I did write this all on discord because I needed to explain the scene to said friend and it was going to be easier to just write it and AAAAAA

okay here are some words of scar being a badass byeeeee

-- --

The Hero Corp keeps insinuating that Scar is working with the villains. They keep insisting that he break more and more of his morals to find more stuff.

And finally, he just goes "Do you want a villain? Because I can give you one.”

And it's dead silent.

No one says shit.

Gem's apprentice, Guqqie, is there with their jaw dropped.

Scar's usually green eyes are glowing red.

He's angry.

"It seems to me that you want a villain," Scar says, his voice echoing in the silent room. "I can give you one. Isn't that what you want?”

No one says anything.

Scar's red eyes burn into the side of [boss]'s skull. "I thought you wanted a villain.”

Some people are staring at him. Some are trying to get out of this room. Some are trying to ignore what's happening.

"Did you not want a villain?" Scar asks. "I don't appreciate lying.

"I can't lie," Scar says. "I'm not sure if you know this, but I cannot lie. I feel like maybe you'd extend the same courtesy for me.”

"Do you want a fucking villain?" Scar snaps. "Or are you just unsatisfied with me having boundaries? Not liking how you compare me to Fauna and wish I got taken instead? Realizing that Villains are people too?”

It wouldn't've been terrible to be taken by Sparrow (Grian, Scar thought with mild wonder. A beautiful name. His heart fluttered, despite the situation), but the thought still stood. [boss] didn't know that Sparrow wouldn't hurt him.

"Don't you want a villain?" Scar asks, quietest yet. "Don't you?" More silence. The clock on the wall ticks. Scar can hear his heavy breath in time with his heartbeat. "Well, I'll give you one." He rips his hero badge from around his neck and lays it on the table. "I resign.”

And he stalks away, the explosion of "no!"s and "why?"s and "HOTGUY GET BACK HERE!"s blocked out by his mind.

And he walks up to his apartment, his mild haven here, and sees Pearl and Jimmy. He snaps his fingers, lifting Pearl's curse. She looks up in alarm, and Jimmy follows suit.

"We're leaving." Scar tells them, leaving no room for argument. "And we're not coming back.”

[sourscratched]

picking up the funny little guys like they’re miis in the plaza and dropping them into the fair au

extra doodles and notes etc

- josh and katrina have matching earrings designed to look like gyrfalcon feathers (they’re tiny but they’re there i swear)

- rachel of course has a wolf pendant for her hacker besties 🌙🐺

- janices necklaces are a hammer and artisanal ice

- janices “sword” is just a big handsaw (couldn’t find a way to reconcile medieval sword with coping saw in any realistic way so handsaw it is)

(B is the one i used, you could kinda pretend it’s a sword if you unfocus your eyes)

thank you to all the beautiful people in the discord and everyone who gave me ideas for the outfits!!! 💖💖💖💖 @wheelsupin-azarathmetrionzinthos @fatestitcherr @vexillologyisenjoyable @spacetime-storytime (let me know if i missed anybody who gave design ideas!)

(I drew the above one a few days before the discord chat about the renfaire au designs started so that’s why Josh’s outfit is weird)

couldn’t get this out of my head, wanted to draw jester josh so bad... didn’t know what to do for lorenzo and d’artanio so i just used my old design but slightly fancier lol

and jacques and felipe from flow of the rings can be there too

other potential ideas

- polypalooza came down dressed as their dnd characters and did some photoshoots

- brendan and his friends are of course also at the fair

zekes character is having the time of his life hanging out and taking selfies with all the Star Wars cosplayers

Jess’s character found a bunch of people to play tag with (and another group of people to act out the movie Tag while they do it)

zachs simultaneous karaoke guy maybe got into doing chants and tavern renditions of his favorite songs. and also considering the fact that the man accidentally sexted brendan in the opening number i think he probably already has the falconers contact info and is hoping to see them at the fair (lorenzo and d’artanio don’t own phones but luckily he happens to know a guy who trains carrier pigeons) (and his wife who sells stationery)

idk if byler made it to the fair, he may have been preoccupied trying to solve the mystery of how a mourning dove got mixed in with his pigeons and why it had a scrap of paper tied to its leg with “whoops wops widdly wops” scrawled on it

that evening there’s some musical acts down at the lake, including some boy band called Plato Could Never. no one’s super sure who they are but they’re local and apparently they’ve got killer harmonies

that’s all for now, thanks for reading my strange ramblings trying to connect everything for no reason at all

[nabanna]

my piece for @voicesfortheblade :D for prompter neonyxrae on discord <3

The request was for a vampire!Phil holding freshly-turned-vampire!Techno in the nest (which I interpreted as a big coffin-shaped bed thing for the aesthetic, but then zoomed in so far you can't tell anymore lmao) while vampire!Kristin drinks from him, in a fluffy or hurt/comfort way

More detailed description/rambling under the cut uwu

Originally I was going to write a whole oneshot then switched to drawing a comic, then my computer crashed so I just focused in on the most important panel in the comic (I think there was going to be dialogue here but it was like part of the setup for a joke)

The hurt/comfort was going to come in with some comedy in the written piece with the idea that Techno is a middle of nowhere farmer whose neighbors are the Ancient Eccentric Vampire Couple (and it's ambiguous whether Kristin is like, literally the first vampire ever or maybe an avatar of death itself that happens to have very vampiric traits) and they become besties. There's an implied agreement they had to turn Techno into a vampire when he got old(tm) or in a life-threatening emergency.

Naturally I was going with the life threatening emergency!

So there's a storm and Techno goes out to save a little farming experiment he had going on near the edge of a lake, then gets struck by lightning and lands in the lake, while Philza fishes him out of.

Seeing that he's injured and might have water in his lungs, the two decide this counts as vampire time and proceed. He wakes up after the process and they have to tell him about the new lightning-caused streaks in his hair and scars on his face because he no longer has a reflection, and he's like "dang that must've been some storm, I barely remember anything after stepping outside" and goes further to assume that they tried CPR or some kind of resuscitation before going to vampire time haha

And the joke is they don't know what CPR is or that humans can be resuscitated after that sort of thing, which he makes fun of them for and swears to continue making fun for the rest of however long vampires 'live'

and the last two panels were going to be him starting a whole comedic monologue about it while Phil and Kristin make eye contact both thinking that it's weird he's stayed awake this long right after turning, then his speech bubble would kinda fizzle out because he passed out again, and it would end on them snuggling.

This was kind of a fusion of the earlier part of that scene where they're talking (and Kristin is having a sip of blood because it's the fastest way to check on how the turning process is going for him), and then the last one with the snuggling.

[deadgirlwalking91]

What are your top 5 Adam, Lute, and GuitarSpear headcanons?

Hey Anon,

I love headcanons! 😊 Here we go... (under the cut because it's longgggg)

Adam

The type to pick up random hobbies, be utterly obsessed with them for a while, then eventually discard them for something else fun and exciting. Only a few have stuck with him through the years—namely, playing the guitar and cooking. Yes, I think Adam would be an amazing cook with a genuine appreciation for food and culture.

Also the type to be naturally talented at a lot of different things. Which is lucky for him, because he's also lazy and can't be bothered putting a whole lot of effort into things, unless he really, really loves what he's doing (see: guitar)

The more I dwell on it, the more I think Adam and Sera do have a close relationship. I wouldn't necessarily say mother/son coded, but I think if he came to her for advice—or if she sensed that he needed guidance—they'd put aside their boss/employee dynamic and have a good heart-to-heart where he'd value her opinion.

Getting a little NSFW for this one, but I feel he'd be more of a giver than a receiver in bed. He's had that much sex over the years that for him, knowing he's getting somebody else off is just as much of a turn-on as receiving. That's not to say he doesn't love getting taken care of, though ;)

LOVES the Exorcists to bits. Genuinely gets along with them all, and loves seeing them grow and succeed with each Extermination. Will socialise with them, play card/board games with them (which tends to get violent and chaotic), sometimes they go to him for advice, etc. On the flip side though— a Discord server I'm in recently had a discussion about whether Exorcists get their periods or not and if so, would they all sync up? And honestly, my answer to both is a resounding Y E S which means that for a week every month, Adam has to deal with hundred of PMSing women. I have a theory that they all also exhibit similar symptoms which change every cycle, so he's constantly kept on his toes (and probably trying not to be killed). Is this true? Look, probably not, but it's still a fun as fuck concept to think about!

Lute

To contrast my first Adam headcanon, Lute would be a god-awful cook. She burns pasta. Does not give a shit about food, cooking etc. Could live off protein shakes if she could, but deep down loves the food Adam cooks.

Lute and Vaggie were friends before The Maiming. I genuinely believe they were close—possibly besties—then, Vaggie started expressing her discomfort with the Exterminations, and they drifted apart. I don't necessarily think they had a falling out before Lute and Adam left Vaggie in Hell, but they certainly weren't friends anymore. I also think, should the show go down the route of Sinner Adam, Fallen Lute and the both of them joining the Hotel that there's potential for them to repair their relationship, despite everything (or maybe that's wishful thinking on my behalf because I do love the idea of them being friends).

Assuming Lute is Heavenborn, she is the way that she is because she doesn't know any different. Being a genocidal maniac is what she was created to be. I genuinely think that there's potential for her to change her tune about Hell, Sinners, the Exterminations etc but it's going to take a LOT for it to happen (I strongly maintain that the line 'Everyone can be redeemed/From the evil to the strange' from 'Happy Day in Hell' is foreshadowing this). If it does, her loyalties will lie with Charlie and the Hotel, and she'll stop being quite so rigid with her views. It's giving growth.

In saying that—she has her vices, and I think they'd be something in complete contrast to her tough exterior. Think rom-coms, romance novels, 90's boy/girl bands, trashy reality TV, luxurious bubble baths, etc. Something that you'd never expect from a bad bitch like Lute. Adam knows about them all, and she's threatened to kill him multiple times if he breathes a word of them to anybody.

Also loves and adores the Exorcists, but doesn't show it. Someone has to play bad cop during work, and it sure as hell isn't gonna be Adam. Still, she feels a strong sense of pride whenever they succeed, and wishes she could be close to them. She's just a little awkward and doesn't know how to balance that boss/friend relationship with them.

GuitarSpear

Their relationship is the worst-kept secret in Heaven. Both of them staunchly deny there is anything going on between them, but the amount of times they've been caught in compromising positions by the other Exorcists is laughable. There's betting pools on when/where they finally admit they're together. The girls also tease Lute about it mercilessly in the locker room after training, much to her annoyance.

They are a very touchy-feely couple, but in different ways. Adam is handsy and grabby, whereas Lute will do smaller, subtler gestures like a hand resting on his arm or lower back, will lean against him, etc. The only exception is that she tends to climb him like a cat—which he doesn't really mind. She'll also force her way into his lap and curl up against him.

They don't live together, but they might as well. Lute spends most of her spare time at his place, keeps clothes and toiletries there, makes herself at home. The only reason they haven't moved in is because they're trying (and failing) to keep their relationship under wraps.

I actually can't decide who fell first, and who fell harder. I can see it happening both ways. I think I like the idea of Lute's attraction to him being more of a slow-burn and something that evolved over time. Whereas Adam's is a lot faster, and he is super confused by it all and can't figure out why all of a sudden he is SO attracted to Lute. It then makes him super awkward around her (like, can't get his words out properly awkward), she gets all concerned something's wrong with him, and it creates this fun little scenario where you want to bash their heads together and tell them to just communicate.

NSFW-ish: I picture them as more of a switch couple in bed, rather than having set top/bottom or dom/sub roles. Given their personalities, I can see them fighting/struggling for power and dominance in the bedroom on a regular basis. That's not to say there aren't times where they do willingly take a top/bottom role (Lute after a long day letting Adam take care of her? Swoon. But also, the power dynamic shifting so that Lute calls the shots? Y E S). I just like the visual of them rolling around, pinning each other to the bed, leaving scratch and bite marks all over each other's bodies in the process. Honestly, I think sex between them would mostly be rough, frenzied and raw, but they also would have their slower, sensual moments (see TYFTV 17 as an example) that are just as intense and passionate. If you got through alllll of that, I applaud you, haha! But seriously, thanks Anon, this was fun to write out <3