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maggotmouth · 3 years

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hillo sexthy legends !! i’m nora and i’ll be writing margo colby n probs sm1 else bcos lets be real, i lack self-control. u can find her pinterest here n some info abt her sexy self below the cut. plot with me on discord ( hot girl midsommar#8664 ) or in my ims !! x o x

* CAMILA MORRONE, CIS WOMAN + SHE / HER | you know MARGO COLBY, right? they’re TWENTY-THREE, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, ELEVEN YEARS? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to SCRAWNY BY WALLOWS like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole BLEACH WHITE SNEAKERS POUNDING ON A GYMNASIUM FLOOR, USING THE SAME BLUNT SCISSORS TO HACK THE SLEEVES OFF AN EXES T-SHIRT THAT YOU USE TO CUT YOUR 3AM FRINGE, A WALNUT-SHAPED ACHE IN THE PIT OF YOUR STOMACH FOR THE PERSON YOU COULD HAVE BEEN thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is AUGUST 8TH, so they’re a LEO, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( nora, 25, gmt, she/her )

CLICK ANYWHERE ON THIS SENTENCE FOR SEXII GOOGLE DOC!!

bullet point summary of margo.

— born margaret but NOBODY calls her that. its colby, coach or margo, and go to the privileged few. margo grew up in the creek commune n then dropped out of school cos of a teenage pregnancy so she was a bit of a cautionary tale back in’t’day (said tht in my yorkshire accent). she now works for summer camps coaching pee wee soccer and pee wee cheer, as well as helping out her beekeeper dad on his honey farm, which is jst north of abernathy creek, and working at scuba on the off seasons.

— its just her and her dad, and has been for as long as she can recall !! everything she knows about her mum could fit on the back of the weathered passport photo she keeps in her wallet of a stranger who shares her face - her name’s melody, or at least tht was name she used when working as a dancer, she’s from argentina and dropped mag’s dad as soon as someone w more money came along.

— margo’s father is a beekeeper with his own organic honey company. margo and her dad moved to irving in the early 00s, the summer between grade school and middle school, because her dad had heard about the communal living in abernathy creek and wanted to lend his skills there and live off the fatta the land in a very lenny from of mice and men kinda way.

— for a few years of middle school margo was bullied for living with the ‘freaks from the creek’, but when they realised how chill her dad was with underage drinking, margo ‘keg-bringer’ colby soon gained popularity among the more renegade students. every so often, the high school parties would happen at her end of town, occasionally with members of the commune even offering the high schoolers a spiritual experience they’d never forget (often in the form of mushrooms) which meant people tried to stay on her good side. to get an invite to a margo colby party handed you a free pass to make up the most ridiculous shit about the commune you liked and nobody else could say anything, because they’d never been to the creek.

— at school, margo had a lot of ‘behvioural issues’ bcos of undiagnosed adhd, she found it difficult to sit still for hours n write down huge chunks of information n her restlessness was seen as laziness. she was encouraged to do sports, as were most of the kids who weren’t that academically inclined, but she turned out to be pretty hot shit at sprinting, because she grew up surrounded by bee houses and he who runs slowest gets stung, baybeyy!! so yea, in school sports became her LIFE. she was gonna get a sports scholarship to college but ended up dropping out of school in senior year n becoming one of those kids who could have had it all but lost it.

— she had sex with sutter at a house party when she wasnt really ready because it felt like the right thing to do at the time and everybody else was doing it. she’d attended health class, she’d seen the corny videos. she knew about all the statistics, but she also knew that it had never happened to anyone she knew and the pull out method was basically safer than the morning after pill and way less expensive.

— a teenage pregnancy knocked her out of the runnings for prom queen and meant she had to leave school early. she didn’t go to college when her friends did, instead she spent the time interviewing potential foster candidates and eating her weight in lindt chocolate while marathoning love island in her room.

— she had a son, who she passed off to someone else a couple of towns away. it was a closed adoption which seemed like the best idea at the time, but she now wishes she had access to his life.

— after peaking in high school and jumping between jobs for a few years, she got a more permanent role at scuba which she loves with all of her heart and soul, but unfortunately a bar job doesn’t pay the rent.

— she works at summer camps coaching junior soccer and netball on the side. she’s extremely competitive and takes it very personally if her team lose. the kids all call her, coach colby n write her longwinded letters about how they’ll never forget this summer camp before they go back to their suburban picket fence houses n she keeps all the letters in a drawer n takes them out to read when she’s feelin depressed.

— enjoys surfing and worked for a number of years on resorts like mila kunis’ job in forgetting sarah marshall. she went on to work 18-hour days as a stewardess on luxury yachts which is a part of her backstory i added after watching season one of below deck because i guess i really am that fucking impressionable. met most of her surf friends doing tht but said she’d never in her life do it again bcos it was mostly just picking up after rich white ppl for shit pay. she came back to irving n thats when she started doing the summer camp jobs so she could move out of the creek n get her own apartment.

— she never actually finished senior year so she’s currently going to night school at the community college to get through her exams and is trying to save to go to college or open university. she wants to major in criminology. she’s super ambitious but also super adhd so she fluctuates between thinking she can achieve anything to just feeling like a failure n thinkin whats the point

— used to shoplift to feel joy and as an act of resistance to her hippy commune routes, but now sees herself as a reformed, bin-diving freegan (sims 4 eco living can i get a hell yaaaa). also she thinks it’s totally wrong to steal when you have enough money and clearly don’t need to steal to survive, ppl risk imprisonment for basic necessities, so for her to do it for a brief thrill and some new shades felt a bit derogatory

— was raised jewish. became a vegetarian as a child because it seemed, at the time, easier than having to explain which foods she was and wasn’t allowed to eat together, so she just cut out meat entirely. still a vegetarian now and dabbles in veganism, although its become less about not eating certain meats in the milk of their mother and more about her global impact / carbon footprint

— nurses little animals to health in her garden. has a hedgehog name OJ short for orange juice not the other one filthy pig. her and her dad have always been huge animal rights activists and existed on a vegetarian diet. the only one in their house who isn’t vegetarian is their cat, auggie. (short 4 augustus gloop)

— has a lot of stupid ass stick and poke tattoos. there was a phase during her years as a barmaid where she wanted to train as a tattoo artist n would mostly practice on herself or any friends who would let her

— she doesn’t form many long lasting friendships cos she tends to be super excited when she makes a new friend and just see them all the time but then it wears off and she can ghost a bit. she’ll always coming pinging back but she’s not the most predictable or loyal friend, sometimes she’ll sleep in your house every night for a week and then you won’t even get a text from her for a month. her best friends are elderly neighbours and houseless people she meets when volunteering at the foodbank. she thinks they’re more authentic than most of the ‘fake posers’ she meets down the vela pier

— calls herself a butch lesbian but still has sex with men when she wants validation. sexually attracted to some men, especially effeminate men, but only romantically attracted to women. very possessive of the gals in her life.

— stopped giving a shit about getting older or adhering to anyone elses bullshit standards, realised it was all fake p much as soon as she dropped out of school and one by one her friends just stopped texting her

— lives in one of the lofts in port apartments. it’s open plan with rugs and lava lamps everywhere. she has a palette bed. its all very ‘sustainable chic’. like, oh wow, a pallet bed that im supposed to think you made from scratch but i KNOW you got it off ebay because you thought it looked trendy

— constantly says shes poor but still buys clothes from urban outfitters. sus.

— frequently found at fannies flirting with the cute bisexual bartender with a choppy black bob.

general vibe / personality

vibrant, vulgar, self-absorbed, tenacious, veers bewteen apathetic and dogmatic, temperamental, flighty, unreliable, magnetic, charismatic, passive aggressive, likes to play devil’s advocate, takes the moral high ground. estp and a leo

likes: 70s music, john wayne movies, black mirror, philosophy, cowboy chic culture, dc comics, the smell of locker rooms,, deep red lipstick, lacrosse sticks, smoking weed from a bong, dogs, karaoke, pet rats, kate moss, late-night strolls, hawaaiian shirts worn open over a bralette, skinned knees, thai food, picking the apples at the very top of the trees, zip-lining, cigarettes, the idea of pegging but not the practical application of it, decorative lamps, LGBTQ+ pin badges, worn-out furniture, twangy electric guitars.

dislikes: girls who call other girls ‘pick me’ girls, woody allen movies, mental mathematics, wealthy children, quentin tarantino, ironing, institutionalised misogyny, the imaginary future, french literature, ‘dump him’ feminism, wes anderson films, spoken word poetry nights, college-educated bar staff who act like they’re better than you, indie softbois, the general mentality of cheerleading squads.

aesthetics

orange peel, the smell of bleach, skeleton drawings in the margins of a journal, thumb holes poked through the cuffs of your sleeves, bleach white sneakers pounding on a gymnasium floor, setting dumpsters on fire for the hell of it. a hit flask of vodka decorated with hello kitty stickers, split knuckles, alien conspiracy theories and sci-fi paperbacks, doc martens with fraying laces, a child in an oversize bee keepers suit, scabbed knees, not eating your greens, smiling with a mouthful of blood, and piercing your own ears with a safety pin when your dad wouldn’t take you, a tennis racket you punched through in a fit of temper, feet pounding the earth until your soles bleed crimson, sleeping in a cherry lip balm and scrunchies to keep the wild locks from your eyes.

hoo boy this is getting LONG AS FUCK but here are my wanted plots

wanted plots

ok margo’s been in irving since she was like 10. she’s quite a vivacious person?? she dresses completely instinctively without any sense of cohesion so she stands out. a guy once told her she was wearing the ugliest outfit he’d ever seen and he thought that was so cool and brave of her. but anyway where was i going.. she grew up in the abernathy creek so stuck out like a sore thumb,,,, maybe ppl who were super interested in the creek or maybe poked fun at her bcos of it idk.....

b4 she dropped out, margo used 2 b in with the cool kids at school bcos her dad would buy them booze and rarely ask for the money. maybe a fun plot cld b with some of the ‘it girls’ she used to hang around with b4 she got pregnant n dropped out and they all went off to college n stopped texting her.

frinds !! unlikely friends !! toxic friends !! some1 she feels like she knew before irving ???

since margo literally can’t differentiate between romantic and platonic love, she’s got off with so many of her mates, so i want awkward friendships where they nearly dated, or exes that have now just turned into weird friendships. fwbs. enemies with benefits. all the angst. all the slow burn mutual pining we hate each other narratives

locals who play sports. margo wld be all over community soccer n take it way too seriously. maybe ppl she plays hockey with. girls who she’s like, weirdly intimate with but its not a thing cos the other girls straight !!! what do u mean !! aha just fun !

she works part time at scuba. i want a mate that just goes and sits in there talking to her until her manager gets angry.

she's also a surf instructor and occasionally works as a lifeguard!! gal has like 7 jobs ik but regular swimmers hmu

ppl she coaches at the gym !! she wants to be a personal trainer

i reckon she might have recently started meditating to try and calm down her mind cos its always bustling with thoughts, n i think she’s p interested in buddhism so if anyone’s a buddhist hmu

someone she’s trying to make a zine with on female empowerment and women in film and art, etc. just a very feminist zine.

TLDR: angry sports gay, former high school track prodigy turned drop out, who likes feminist literature, wearing leather jackets over slip dresses, and smudged red lipstick.

this was so long !!! im sorry !! if you’ve read this far have a biscuit, love x

#aaaaaaa #we back boys #irvingintro #hmu for plots bayybeyyy

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juviin · 3 years

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Here’s literally all the rosie lore.

(template 1) (template 2)

Name: Rosemary Nare Etana Alias: Ro, Rose, Rosie Personality: Rosemary is very open about her emotions. She takes a while to warm up to people, but when she does, she loves people very strongly. Relatives: Father (estranged), Mother (deceased), 4 older siblings, 2 younger siblings. Status: Alive Species: Human Gender: cis female Age: 19 Eyes: Gold Hair: Pink Appearance: Rosemary is 5′5 and has short pink hair. She has two scars, one along her back and one on her lower right abdomen. She also has a tattoo on her calf of a lily. Birthday: July 30th Constellation: Leo Height: 5′5″ or 165 cm Blood Type: O Occupation: Magic Knight -Squad: Black Bulls Country: Clover Affinity: Lava Magic (On a scale of 0-10: 0 being terrible and 10 being the best) Physical Strength 5/10 Magic Amount 7/10 Magic Control 9/10 Magic Sensing 6/10 Cleverness 9/10 Growth 8/10 Equipment: none

(this next one is all in first person which i am NOT used to writing in but...)

Part 1: The Basics

What is your full name?--Rosemary Nare Etana

Where and when were you born?--I was born on July 30th in a large city in the Common Realm, however we moved to a small town shortly after I was born.

Who are/were your parents? (Know their names, occupations, personalities, etc.)--

Lily Etana was my mother’s name. She worked several jobs while raising us, like waitressing and being a maid. She was very kind too, but a lot of people took advantage of her for that. I guess that’s why Val and I have taken to being aggressive about how we feel, and aggressive in sticking up for her. When I was 12, an assassin killed her and gave me the scar across my back. I’m sure he was sent by my grandparents, but they played the fool and even sent an advisor to her funeral. Since then, that advisor has scheduled meetings with me monthly to make sure I haven’t told anyone.

My father’s name is Andranik Typhos the fourth? something like that, but I don’t know very much about him. I know he’s a noble, but I’ve never met him. I don’t hear that many complaints about him, and Mother says he was a wonderful gentleman, but I’ve met his parents, and I find it hard to believe that they would raise a lovely son.

Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?--I have four! On my mom’s side, at least.

Valerian is the oldest. He’s sixteen years older than me, so he’s a lot more mature than me, and very protective of us younger siblings. He has three kids, too, and his wife is Eli’s cousin. They have been married since I was only three, so she’s been in our lives forever. The two of them basically became my parents after our mother died, so I couldn’t be more grateful to them.

Then is Dahlia. Dahlia is 12 years older than me. She’s very calm, and there have been more than a few times where Valerian has been freaking out and Dahlia always keeps her cool and fixes the problem. She’s the best at makeup.

Basil is in the direct middle, and they’re 9 years older than me. They are very energetic and mischievous. I don’t think Basil wants a spouse, but they’re very dedicated to their craft. I blame them for the multiple scams of my father’s estate, but who’s complaining? Basil also has a scar along their right cheek, running from their nose to their chin

Azalea is the closest to my age, she’s 25. She’s a lot like our mom. She treats everyone with kindness, but I worry about people taking advantage of her for that.

Also, I know that my father has two children younger than me with his wife, but I’ve never met them and I probably never will.

Where do you live now, and with whom? Describe the place and the person/people.--I live with the Black Bulls! The base is really crazy and always changing, but there’s always something going on, so everyday is fun.

What is your occupation?--I’m a Magic Knight, but I have also worked some other jobs in the past.

Write a full physical description of yourself. You might want to consider factors such as: height, weight, race, hair and eye color, style of dress, and any tattoos, scars, or distinguishing marks--I’m 5′5, and around 150lbs. My skin is pale, so I tend to burn very easily, and my eyes are yellow and my hair is pink. I like to wear warm colors and clothes that aren’t very tight, as well as boots. I have two large scars, one is about three inches and is a slash along my stomach, while the other one is about eight inches long and runs across my upper back, both from assassination attempts. I try to hide both of them. I also have one tattoo on my lower calf, so it’s usually covered.

To which social class do you belong?--I believe I’m considered a commoner. I likely wouldn’t be considered a noble unless something happened to my father’s legitimate children, though I have no interest in being taken in by his family.

Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?—I get nosebleeds often because of an injury when i was younger.

Are you right- or left-handed?—right handed

What does your voice sound like?—If I had to describe it, I’d say it’s medium in pitch and kind of airy.

What words and/or phrases do you use very frequently?--nothing particularly?

What do you have in your pockets?—um. a handful of flowers, a pocket watch, and assorted candies.

Do you have any quirks, strange mannerisms, annoying habits, or other defining characteristics?—I sometimes bite my nails.

Part 2: Growing Up

How would you describe your childhood in general?--Average for the most part, I’d say. I had a loving mother and 4 great siblings. Still, my mother’s death hit all of us very hard.

What is your earliest memory?--Sadly, my first assassination attempt. That one was when I was around five and it was sent by my father’s family. It gave me the scar on my stomach, and also gave Basil the scar on their face from them protecting me.

How much schooling have you had?--I went to the small schoolhouse in town up until I was 12, and then I started going less so I could work more.

Did you enjoy school?--I enjoyed learning, but I’ve found that I learn more outside of school.

Where did you learn most of your skills and other abilities?--I learned basic first aid and how to identify certain plants and herbs from my siblings. I mostly learned battle from experience and assassins.

While growing up, did you have any role models? If so, describe them.—my siblings, especially Basil

While growing up, how did you get along with the other members of your family?--We all got along very well as kids, though they were all a lot older than me so that did strain our relationships a bit, especially as the youngest.

As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?--As a child I wanted to work in medicine, even though my magic is ill suited for it. I only decided that I wanted to become a Magic Knight after my mother’s death.

As a child, what were your favorite activities?—i used to love helping my mother garden.

As a child, what kinds of personality traits did you display?--I cried a lot more than I do now. I was always scared, as I knew from a young age that my father’s parents wanted me dead.

As a child, were you popular? Who were your friends, and what were they like?--My only friend was really Eli, but she hung out with all the kids from town, so i vaguely knew them.

When and with whom was your first kiss?--also Eli, when we were about 12 and 13.

Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?--I’m not. After Eli left town I kind of lost myself for the next two years until I became a knight.

Part 3: Past Influences

What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?--My mother's death perhaps?

Who has had the most influence on you?--Eli. I think if not for her, I would be a very different person.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?--The amount of nobles I’ve insulted to their faces on official magic knight business.

What is your greatest regret?--being born.

What is the most evil thing you have ever done?--I don’t think I’ve ever done anything “evil”, only some malicious things, but I don’t regret them.

Do you have a criminal record of any kind?--No, but I probably should for extortion.

When was the time you were the most frightened?--The first attempt on my life.

What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?--My elder brother catching me lying about my profession.

If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?—i would be stronger.

What is your best memory?—probably the first few months with the black bulls. It was genuine happiness for the first time in a while.

What is your worst memory?—the aftermath of my mother’s death. I don’t remember the actual event, some mix of trauma and head injuries, but I do remember the weeks following.

Part 4: Beliefs And Opinions

Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?—i think i’m more pessimistic, but i'm trying to be an optimist.

What is your greatest fear?--My greatest fear is once again being too weak to protect the people that I love.

What are your religious views?--I’m not religious.

What are your political views?--I think that the Clover Kingdom’s nobility is corrupt, and the whole system needs to be fixed.

What are your views on sex?--I think nothing much of it.

Are you able to kill? Under what circumstances do you find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable?--I think I’m a hypocrite on this. I think killing is unacceptable, but I wouldn’t hesitate to kill the people that harm the ones I love.

In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?--In my opinion, the most evil thing one can do is to habitually hurt and abuse others.

Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?--No. I don’t think that anything like that is real.

What do you believe makes a successful life?--I think that money plays a large part of success.

How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings (i.e. do you hide your true self from others, and in what way)?--Very open. My emotions are very easily read.

Do you have any biases or prejudices?--Yeah i hate nobles.

Is there anything you absolutely refuse to do under any circumstances? Why do you refuse to do it?--I try to stay out of the public eye as best I can. I also refuse to do jobs near my grandparents’ home.

Who or what, if anything, would you die for (or otherwise go to extremes for)?--Finral or Eli. I’d do anything for them.

Part 5: Relationships With Others

In general, how do you treat others (politely, rudely, by keeping them at a distance, etc.)? Does your treatment of them change depending on how well you know them, and if so, how?—I try to keep people at a distance, but when I become close to someone, they become one of my People. I’d do anything for the people I’m close to.

Who is the most important person in your life, and why?--Right now, it’s probably Eli or Finral. They’ve positively affected me in more ways than I can count.

Who is the person you respect the most, and why?—Captain Yami is the person I respect the most. Joining the Black Bulls changed my life so much for the better, and I’m so grateful that he gave me that opportunity.

Who are your friends? Do you have a best friend? Describe these people—Eli is my best friend. She’s loud and always smiling, but I worry about her. I’m also pretty close to Magna. He’s a great friend and brings out my mischievous side more.

Do you have a spouse or significant other? If so, describe this person.--Finral is great. He’s a little goofy, but he is very loyal and loving.

Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened.--I think I’m in love right now.

How close are you to your family?--I’m very close to my older siblings.

Have you started your own family? If so, describe them. If not, do you want to? Why or why not?--No. I think I’d like to at some point be a mother, but not for a while longer.

Who would you turn to if you were in desperate need of help?--I think I would find it hard to turn to anyone, but if I was so desperate, probably Eli or Magna. I’m too afraid to show Finral my weakness.

Do you trust anyone to protect you? Who, and why?--No. I need to be strong enough to protect myself.

If you died or went missing, who would miss you?--I think that the bulls would.

Who is the person you despise the most, and why?--My father. My mother spoke kindly of him, but he abandoned her.

Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?--I argue more.

Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?—depends who I'm with, but I’m more likely to take a leadership role.

Do you like interacting with large groups of people? Why or why not?—I’d prefer a smaller group, personally, but i’m not bad with large groups.

Do you care what others think of you?—yes. immensely

Part 6: Likes And Dislikes

What is/are your favorite hobbies and pastimes?--I enjoy reading romance novels, and spending time in nature. Flower fields remind me of home and give me comfort.

What is your most treasured possession?—my pocket watch. my mother gave it to me, since it was a gift to her from my father.

What is your favorite color?—i like warm pale yellow

What is your favorite food?—I like crepes!

What, if anything, do you like to read?—I like to read romance.

What is your idea of good entertainment (consider music, movies, art, etc.)?--I enjoy reading. On days off, I often spend hours at a time sitting outside and reading.

Do you smoke, drink, or use drugs? If so, why? Do you want to quit?—I generally don’t, but I will drink sometimes. I probably drink an average amount.

How do you spend a typical Saturday night?—generally hanging around the Bulls hideout. If I have a day off I often go visit home to see my mother’s grave and give her flowers.

What makes you laugh?—My squadmates! I’ve been told my sense of humor is bad..

What, if anything, shocks or offends you?--I hate the prejudices of the Clover nobles.

What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself?—When that happens (because it has before) I will usually walk around the base, sometimes I eat a snack. I also like to head outside and look at the stars when I can’t sleep.

How do you deal with stress?—I will usually end up letting it out, whether emotionally or magically. I don't like to bottle things up.

Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?—I prefer having a plan.

What are your pet peeves?—people talking over others.

Part 7: Self Images And Etc.

Describe the routine of a normal day for you. How do you feel when this routine is disrupted?--I wake up at about 7 every morning, and get ready for the day. If I have a mission, I’ll leave for it early. On days I don’t have a mission, I will either go visit my mother’s grave or go see my grandparents or their advisor.

What is your greatest strength as a person?--I’d say my strength is supporting people. And also throwing lava.

What is your greatest weakness?--I lie a bit too much, and I am a bit indifferent towards people I don’t care about.

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?--I would want to be more caring.

Are you generally introverted or extroverted?--I’d say introvert.

Are you generally organized or messy?--Organized. I don’t like disorder.

Name three things you consider yourself to be very good at, and three things you consider yourself to be very bad at.--I’m good at lying, cleaning, and fighting. I’m bad at controlling my emotions, sewing, and cooking.

Do you like yourself?--No, I really don’t.

What are your reasons for being a magic knight*? Are your real reasons for doing this different than the ones you tell people in public? (If so, detail both sets of reasons…)--I am a magic knight because I want to protect people.

What goal do you most want to accomplish in your lifetime?--I want to heal from my past.

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?--I hope to still be a Magic Knight, and hopefully a higher rank.

If you could choose, how would you want to die?--I would want to die swiftly if I could choose.

If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, name three things you would do in the time you had left.--I would try to isolate myself from the people I love, so that they wouldn’t have to deal with grief. I think I would generally be calm.

What is the one thing for which you would most like to be remembered after your death?--I want to be remembered for my strength.

What three words best describe your personality?--open. loyal. decisive.

What three words would others probably use to describe you?--Rosie is loyal, smart, and loving!!-Eli

#black clover #black clover oc #bc oc #oc rosemary #my art #fhdjksfhk this took so LONG im dying jim #im also doing this Whole thing for eli but shes nowhere near done yet #nini ocs

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borisbubbles · 4 years

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17. CZECH REPUBLIC

Benny Christo - “Kemama”

youtube

So first off, thank you for the nice commens. 😇The past few months haven’t been the happiest time for me, so thank you for your patience as I scraped my bearings together for another post! 😁

So I will now extend that same sympathy to Benny Christo, whom I think I damn fucking underrated. Let’s jump in~

ENTRY ANALYSIS

As one may expect i INSTANTLY liked “Kemama” because you know, it’s a fun, laid-back, tropical afro-breeze, completely different from anything else we would see in NFs and the year. EXACTLY the type of song I was hoping the Czech NF would deliver (and deliver they did, see NF Corner). This level of mild like swung into strong unironic like upon realizing that the title is a contraction of “Okay Mother” 😍 and the song deals with the subject of overcoming racially-tinged discrimination and rising above the hate. That just feels very poetic and apt? “Kemama” felt like the entry that had to overcome the highest odds in order to earn the respect it so fully deserves, and still hasn’t fully reached it.

.In our Western European bubble, comprised mostly of gays and left-liberal straights, we have a very grateful and universal acceptance of many different kinds of [lizard] people that make up Eurovision casts. Yet with “Kemama” we may have reached an unusually grimy undercurrent of coded racism.

Of course nothing I read was outrageously rancid, than Cod for that. The worst statement I read was a double-whammy of “EWW THIS ISN’T CARIBBEANVISION” and “WHY WOULD SOMEONE FROM *KENYA* WANT TO REP CZECHIA IN EUROVISION?”, and yes they first got the continent wrong and then *also* got the country wrong in the follow-up post and then they were torn limb from limb by a pack of aformentioned left-liberals. I’m sorry but i can’t not have any other response than laughter in the face of yet another fucking MORON faceplanting themselves with words like a... racist JK Rowling if you will?

Still, while I never read something outright vile about Benny doesn’t mean I found his deniers really annoying and they were! Think “Ew Solovey is ‘Too Aggressive’ it will NEVER DO WELL IN ESC”, a statement that isn’t coded nor racist (and yet extremely false and misguided), functioned as a similar idea by the same minds. A statement borne from the same breed of narrow-minded stubbornness which has caused elitist morons to be all “there is **SOMETHING** about “Kemama” i do *NOT* like and I cannot lay my finger on it... but I **DO NOT** like it at ALL. It won’t ever qualify because everyone will think the same way I do” -- Eurovision snobs, tiptoeing around racial coda in January 2020.

They would also insist that Benny was “arrogant” because he was seemingly impervious to their (de)constructive criticism. Like, if you were a biracial butterfly living in a slavic country who had to deal with statements such as the above on a regular basis, you WOULD block out the noise. And if you heard them often enough you will start to block them out pre-emptively. DO YOU NOT KNOW HOW COPING MECHANISMS WORK?? (oh wait you’re white-privileged. Nevermind 🙄)

So naturally, when Benny decided that he would revamp “Okay Mother” by adding in MORE African elements it only made me love him even more lol. 😍 Was it a bull-headed, contrarian and possibly really stupid decision? Yes, yes and absolutely yes. Was it worth it? Well he managed to incite even more meltdowns in a group of people I feel nothing but contempt for, so hell yeah? Eurovision was cancelled anyway so who cares how much ‘worse’ “Kemama” actually got.

Okay, so we’ve arrived at the revamp.

Granted, it wasn’t the best ‘vamp, I’d be a fool to deny it. The new elements threw a wrench in the melodic balance of the song. Out went tropical laid-back fun, IN went that fucking guitar oh my god this is some Hotel FM piano levels of overbearing I swear. (nb: this still didn’t stop me from ironically stanning Hotel FM’s lame asses anyway 😍). However, it made the personal backstory that I loved and savoured take a backseat to the now inferior composition. 😭

Regardless, New Kemama was fundamentally the same song, and I fundamentally liked Old Kemama, so whatevs, it made no different to me. In the eyes of many Eurovision diehards we were experiencing WORST PRESHOW SEASON EVER (after three songs... lol) and nothing clinches this brainworm more than a revamp announcement. “OH MY GOD HE WILL RUIN IT! I CAN GUARANTEE YOU I *WON’T* LIKE IT”. Self-fulfilling prophecies, ya know? It certainly didn’t help when the official channel accidentally uploaded a vid with broken soundmixing (‘OMG HORRIBLE LAST IN THE SEMI!!!!’ calm the ever-loving HELL down) and took another FULL WEEK to upload the correct vid. The damage had already been done. Typing "SEE I TOLD YOU THE REVAMP WOULD BE SHITE HA HA HA” in the Kemama comment box really just is the ESC equivalent of reponding with “Actually, *all* lives matter :smug:” to a BLM support pamphlet, isn’t it?

NF CORNER

While not my favourite NF of the bunch, I found the Czech NF to be lowkey epic. Not epic enough to remember its name but regardless Czechvision or whatever marked the end of an era because it was also the last selection spearheaded by Jan Bors :o

I think I’ve made it clear enough in the past that I’m somewhat mixed on Bors Era Czechia - Lake Malawi were a toetapping good, Ickolas was a pockmarked, skin-crawling evil and the other three inhibit a purgatory somewhere between “moderately nice” and “moderate timewaste.”

Still, I have great respect for the man who orchestrated Czech’s comeback after scoring NINE POINTS TOTAL across three years with the mindset of “So what? Why says we can’t win?” so ofc I was all into the idea of the “EIGHT INDIE ANGELS, HAND-PICKED BY BORS HIMSELF” NF that would serve as his swan song.

Naturally things went down the drain the second Bors left, with one of the eight peacing and his successor cancelling the live broadcast (does anyone remember what exactly happened? I vaguely recall one was the cause of the other but lol it’s July can’t be bothered to factscheck (Factsczeck?) anymore, bitches.

Anyway, ON TO THE GOOD STUFF, and yes, there was plenty.

We All Poop - “ All the Blood (Positive Song Actually)”

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Yes, as you can imagine I ofc IMMEDIATELY fell into like when I saw that chyron and invisioned the inevitability of the Czech Rep’s Rep immediately alienating every parent just based on their name alone <3 😍 w/e WAP quickly became that “Good but not great” song you find in every NF that everyone gushes over because it’s the whitest option available. Like, yes, “All the blood” is good, but musically it’s identical to Green Day and Twenty-One Pilots and god name ANY 90s-early00′s American Punk Rock band. For me the enjoyment came from the fact that WAP were openly crazy vegan fundamentalists and the VC clip actively condemns the use ANY animal protein by replacing the cattle and game with LITERAL HUMAN BEINGS. 😍 :fusedmarcintensifies: :kasiamosage:

Pam Rabbit - “Get up”

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Ohhhh YES a glorious experimental Synth-Trap song only I could love and ofc I did. God what is there even to say; the provocative darkness of the verses combined with the swirling amorphousness of the chorus gives me LIFE. LUFF THIS SHIT <3333 Ftr, this was also the fave of Slovene Juror duo / synth angels / Boris faves ZALAGASPER, further proving their pathetic naysayers that they own all things music and the haters can suck a series of-

Barbora Mochowa - “White and Black Holes“

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Lol, yes even with a “Get up” existing, there was a song I liked even more. Barbora proved a very competent Lana del Gay last year, but I was a YUGE fan of this year’s... Kate Bush-Björk blend of ethereal awesome. It is so soothingly beautiful and the rare example of a song that I find completely free of flaws. Were the competition not such a hard place, I’d be pissed she didnt win (at least she won the jury vote MASSIVE KUDOS to every alum on that) but w/e this selection had opions and I’m rather robbed of a “Kemama” than I am of a BRILLIANT IRREPLICABLE AETHERBALLAD. ~Danse balance sûr les white and black holes~

Elis Mraz & Cis T - “Wanna be like”

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I *VERY* strongly felt that if the Czech Republic wanted to win ESC, they should have picked Elis and even now I STILL believe she could have won. That isn’t to say I gushed over “Wanna be like” because I find it kind of annoying lol. Yes, I LOVE an annoying female voice (:Tones&Icackle:) but Elis’s reaches a Camilla Cabello sort of place for me (good lord get Senorita OFF the fucking radio) and the Scat + White Guy Rapping middle-eight. 😬. However, the second I opened up the video clip for this paragraph and was immediately BLASTED by Elis murdering a ukelele and wearing a “schoolgirl” outfit straight from a Japanese tentacle porn movie and OH MY GOD THE AGGRESSIVE TWERKING made me reconsider that hey, this min-sized Meghan Traynor actually kinda highkey owns, yo! Yet, I’m not at all bothered we lost her in the Czech NF because we got UNO DOS QUATRO CINCO SEIS :fatmansplit: fill up the megameme slot instead, so...

Eurovision 2020 vs Eurovision 2021

BENNY RUINED HIS SONG AND NEVER WOULD HAVE QUALIFIED. jk I’m not a moron. Sure, “Kemama” wasn’t an easy sell because you know AFROBEAT in a contest where half of the people watching are fash (ie: all of Eastern Europe, who watch out of ~Nationalistic Sentiment~ 😬), but there are Kemama live renditions out there and he owns them SO hard lol. A few soundmixing issues really would not have stopped Benny from qualifying in that RIDICULOUSLY WEAKSAUCE SEMIFINAL are you fucking kidding me. He probably would’ve bombed in the Grand Final, but I mean it’s Czech and it’s not Ickolas so ofc it would have.

And Czech renewed him for 2021 regardless of the sceptics, woohoo! I think part of it was due the Czech not wanting to re-organize an ENTIRE NF from scratch without Jan Bors, but probably also because Benny owns live when he isn’t engaged in psychological trench warfare with actual human detritus <3 and also because the Czech fucking CARE about their artists and don’t drop them like a sack of rotten potatoes wtfshitprus.

Can’t wait for the moment when he qualifies and Efendi does not, etc, etc.

FREAKY! FRIDAY! FACTOR!

I’d say that the core around which the Ben Drama spun was pretty standard fare: niche fave beats out the concensus fave, meltdowns ensue, people convince themselves it was the WRONG decision because it wasn the result they wanted, try to disown the song and make a fool of themselves because the song slaps, sorry. Even the revamp drama felt more of less generic for me, because yawn fantards melting down over a revamp of a song they don’t even like what else is new.

However, what I do take away that the revamp was ENTIRELY Benny’s idea which he told no one about (cue to JAN BORS having a social media meltdown like he’s Caesar at the Ides of March 💔) added MORE afrobeat just to troll his haters even more <3 God, I’d say it was bad from a musical perspective but this level of in-your-face defiance is fucking iconic and hilarious, sorry. This entire this year is so batshit bonkers that the concept of a someone potentially shooting themselves in the foot and “torpedo’ing” their qualification chances (not rly, he would’ve Q’d anyway lol) JUST to take the moral high ground in a racially coded argument only HE took seriously may not even be the craziest concept in the year! (lol it definitely isn’t. Look at the pics I haven’t greyed out yet)

This and more yield Benny some well-earned Senheads! Yay!!

Score: 3 Senhits out of 5.

#Eurovision #Eurovision 2020 #Eurovision Song Contest #Czech Republic #Czechia #Bohemia #Ben Christovão #Benny Christo

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fan-clan-fun · 4 years

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I have zero self control

Here I am back at it again with new fanclans!!

I literally spent three hours thinking about this as I helped a friend move to a new apartment, its nice to have something to think about while hauling boxes.

Anyway! Thanks to the anon who mentioned medievalish clans, I wanted to give another go (kinda) to one of my older ideas for a medieval clan, but it’s kinda turned out different than I intended.

First I determined that I wanted to use a sort of hereditary monarchy sort of thing, although its a bit different, and I wanted these clans to be the ones to finally use my list of deities I came up with forever ago.

My thinking was definitely not linear, so I will attempt to pull a coherent train of thought out of the mess.

The Basics:

There are two clans, Dawnclan and Duskclan, named for where their territory is (Dawnclan to the east, Duskclan to the west) and the order of their formation (Dawn first and Dusk second). Duskclan was formed after a dispute of leadership caused an almost half and half split in the clan and the disgruntled party left.

The leadership of the clans is based on a specific concept, that was started back when the clan was first founded. The clans are led by a Monarch and their consort. The Monarch must be close blood (child, sibling, niece/nephew, cousin) to the previous Monarch and descended from the original line of the founding cats (Mother Misty). The Consort does not have to be their mate, nor do they have to love each other, but they serve as a team in guiding the clan. One of the pair is in charge of things outside of camp (hunting, patrolling, etc), while the other is in charge of things inside camp (maintenance, keeping kits occupied and educated, ensuring everyone has the supplies they need, etc). It does not matter which of the pair does this, either monarch or consort may choose either job, but they may not each do the same one. The only other requirement, is that the monarch must provide heirs, either through their body, or if that is not possible through other means of close family.

Part of the differences between Dawnclan and Duskclan, is that they see who is eligible for this duo differently. Dawnclan could care less if its a cis male/female pairing, or any other under the sun, such as a lesbian or gay or nontraditional pair, so long as they can find a way to have heirs. But Duskclan insists it must be a male/female (can be trans) partnership, as they see it as an issue of balance, as well as the consort must be clan born and bred. This is due to the fact that what broke the original clan in two was that the female monarch took an infertile (spayed) female consort and had no intention of producing kits, expecting their sibling to provide. The soon to be leader of Duskclan took issue with this, and left.

Dawnclan says that the reason for the split was because the leader of Duskclan was a sore loser, which to some degree he was. Because the way it is decided which of the Monarch’s relatives (with preference towards children, siblings, and nieces/nephews) will become the next monarch, is that those who wish to become monarch must submit to a challenge. Either the potential Heir or their consort (whichever plans to be in charge of outside the camp), will engage in a duel (or tournament if there are enough challengers) to determine the rightful heir. The duels are until first visible blood, a sign that the cat is willing to shed blood for their clan if necessary, and forming a pact in blood between the challengers even if they have lost. So when the leader of Duskclan lost to his sister, he refused to live under her rule, gathered supporters who agreed with him, and left.

Clan Ranks/Culture:

So as I mentioned before, I do want to use the deities I had made before, and as a result, Im fiddling a little with ranks.

Instead of just Medicine cats, there are two ranks:

Healer: These are your traditional medicine cats, but with the added duties of memorizing clan trees and bloodlines and the basic history of the clans, such as the great events and when they occurred, the wars, etc.

Clerics: These are the cats who take charge of religious teachings, of signs a prophecies, and most religious ceremonies. They are the ones who bestow favor on a new monarch, they are the ones who tell the moral stories of heroes and villains, they are the counselors and support for the cats in their clan.

Sometimes the duties of both Clerics and Healers intercept, and they have at times been at odds, but they usually resolve their differences.

There are always at least 2 of each at all times, but its not uncommon for each clan to have 3-4 Healers or Clerics. They cant risk the knowledge being lost, so they take the necessary precautions.

There is also a special rank, known as the Knights.

These are generally 3-4 cats who are known to be the absolute best at what they do. They are considered the Monarch and Consort’s Honor Guard, their personal envoys, their paws, their ears, their voices, etc. Usually each Knight has a distinct set of skills, though they are still well rounded, but their is generally the best fighter, and the other three might be the best tracker, or the most stealthy, or the best hunter, or the most eloquent and diplomatic, etc. Knights often are considered to be very desirable as mates (male or female since knights can be either), and its not uncommon for them to be chosen as consorts by potential heirs (In fact in Duskclan most consorts were Knights at one point). Knights do rotate out over time (or don’t make it to retirement due to being in a position of danger more than anyone else) based on the Monarch’s needs and desires, but they keep the title Champion even after they are no longer a Knight, in honor of their service.

How the clans were originally founded:

So this was just a thought I had, that the clans came originally from a clowder, who’s leader, Misty, accepted and allowed her mate to stay. Most clowders often either have one lead male who will chase away or kill kits or other cats he doesnt like, but Dusty was different. He was still fiercely protective of his mate and kits, but he wasn’t aggressive. Other females felt safe around him. And when his Misty’s kits were born and being raised, her daughter Rain convinced her to give other toms a chance too. So before even a clan was established, before names were being changed, the idea of mentoring and apprenticeships was there. Dusty or some of the other females would mentor kits, and if a male could make it through apprenticeship without showing dangerous aggressive tendencies he was allowed to stay. So soon the clowder had not just one male, but several, and it started to grow.

When Misty finally retired, Rain took over, and she chose her own consort to help lead with her, named Beetle. Then they gathered their group together and named themselves officially as a clan (not Dawnclan, that would come later). Together they decided on rules and regulations (the original code), so that they could begin to interact with outsiders and potentially allow them in. It was a much smaller code than canon, and its main tenants included not harming kits, not being aggressive towards one another unless in defense, and that everything in the clan was shared and that the weakest and most vulnerable should get first choice. Over time it evolved to include more, but that was the very start.

Religion came with the next generation, at Misty’s death, when the old stories of the gods took on a new light. Mothers began teaching their kits about Misty as an incarnation of Mehr, the primal mother deity, the one which most cats had heard of and acknowledged. The other god which was taught was the deity of chaos and death, which was a natural counterpoint to Mehr as the deity of birth and life. The other deities evolved over time as new roles and ranks became important. Some took on more real life energy as certain cats were considered incarnations of them, like Misty had been.

Funnily enough, Dawnclan considers the founder of Duskclan to be the incarnation of Hissao, the betrayer.

As for medicine.... well Im not sure, this is as far as I got thinking wise, and I just needed to write it down before I forgot so... yeah. If people like this I might write more about it, Im liking what I have so far, and I never could tell myself to stop.

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ryderxmms · 4 years

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folks ... it is i, chelly, once again to introduce you to another one of my children !! ryder is a goof. a musical goof. who’s definitely been Through It, but he’s a lovable guy and i hope you’ll feel the same way after reading all about him !! if you’d like to plot please like this so i can hit you up and shower you in love !!

tw: alcoholism, abuse, angst

* : ･ﾟ･✧･ RYDER STELLAN SIMMS ･✧･ﾟ･ : *

— && guests may mistake me as ( chase stokes ), but really i am ( ryder simms + cis male + he/him ) and my DOB is ( 3/3/1995 ). i am applying for the ( bartender ) position as part of the EHP and would like to live in suite ( 207 ). i should be hired because i am ( relaxed & creative ), but i can also be ( despondent & temperamental ) at times. personally, i like to ( write music, play the drums & guitar, go skateboarding ) when off the clock, but that won’t interfere with work.

this is another ... long read .... and for that i am so sorry listen the muse just be pouring out sometimes but like

TL:DR - ryder’s childhood was confusing and rough for the boy; his parents weren’t good together, in fact they probably brought out the worst in each other. his mother was a depressed woman for much of his childhood and his father was an alcoholic that could be abusive one night and a party the next. music was his solace through out all of it and ryder latched onto his drum kit and guitar for support. it’s just been he and his mom since they moved from seattle to chicago years ago and his sole focus has been on music and doing whatever he can to make it work. he’s got a band called one night stand and he’s really passionate about it & hope to get a record deal one of these days. really he’s just a theater kid, a goof, this loveable guy who will fight for his friends as the loyal guy he is, but otherwise isn’t rough or tough. he’s incredibly passionate and appreciative, like will literally give you the shirt off his back if you need it. he’s been through a lot over the years and he’s felt lost and empty at plenty of points in his life, but there’s a lightness to this boy/

connections: you can find ryder’s connection page right over here and would be open to any of them !! but i’d especially love to see a bandmate, flirtationship, gym buddy, or ride or die for this boyyo

*:･ﾟ･✧･ where it all began: in life, ryder’s always been pretty honest about how fucked up his life is, or at least has been, he grew up in a broken home, truth be told. his parents were far from perfect - just two blue-collared adults struggling to make ends meet. sure, they were married, but that decision got made after his mother found out she was pregnant and there was nothing overtly romantic about any of it. they signed the courthouse paperwork and got a couple of inexpensive bands from the pawnshop and called it a day. from there on, there didn’t have a whole lot of love in their marriage, let alone household, and truly a lot of undeserving resentment had fallen onto ryder’s shoulders once he had been born. it was painfully obvious that neither of his parents were too eager to have a child, especially not with each other and while still only in their twenties, but nothing about that was ryder’s fault; obviously. while his parents tried to show him that they loved him, that they cared unconditionally, there were so many conditions that came with being a member of the simms household.

*:･ﾟ･✧･ about to set fire: ryder’s mother was miserable, clinically depressed and attempting to self-treat herself for the majority of her life, but at the least she was still far more present and caring towards ryder than his father was. he was miserable too, but his father’s version of self-medicating came in the form of alcohol after a long day’s work at the factory. he would slump down in the recliner in their living room and flip on the television, barely making it through an evening without getting drunk. for the longest time, the concept of drinking and getting drunk confused the shit out of ryder. his father was an alcoholic, there was no denying that, but his drunken stupors weren’t always the same. there were occasions where his father was what he later found to be considered a happy drunk - playing on the floor with ryder and laughing so loudly it rumbled against the walls and dancing with his mother to the radio in their kitchen. but then there were nights where his father was a mean drunk - shoving ryder to the floor, yelling so loudly that it shook the pictures on the wall, slapping his mother in their kitchen. whatever version of his father he or his mother was going to get was a mystery, and when things were good they seemed great, but when things were bad they seemed dangerous. ryder never questioned his mom when she’d take him out for a long ride and make him stay at grandma’s for a week. never questioned when she would shoo him upstairs to his room so that he didn’t have to deal with whatever was going on. never questioned why she stayed, either. why they were subjected to any of this. that was ryder’s world, it was his life, and it wasn’t until he grew up a little that he began to realize just how wrong everything was about his household.

*:･ﾟ･✧･ change of pace: it was a shocking mid-fall afternoon, rain pattering down against the windows and into the bucket that was collecting the rainwater from the leak in their roof, that everything seemed to change. ryder’s father came home in one of those happy drunken moments and announced to he and his mother that he was in love with another woman and was going to move in with her, was going to petition for a divorce and that it was going to be the best thing that had ever happened to him … ryder was thirteen at the time and he understand what it meant to be in love, what a divorce meant, what his father was: a cheating, alcoholic, sick man. to be quite honest, ryder wasn’t even that upset about the news - he quite figured that it might be the best thing for he and his mother. there was nothing picture perfect about their family, but maybe, just maybe, they’d at least all be better away from each other. but of course, as with the happy drunken nights came the angry drunken nights, and while ryder’s father stayed firm on wanting to get out of the house and leave his mother, there were a whole lot more fights and a lot more shoving and punching and kicking and bruises. then there were afternoons where they’d meet with an official to sign paperwork, shaking each other’s hands at the end of it all … the relationship confused ryder, it made him question what was to be considered ‘normal’ in his own life. what he wanted for himself in the future. he needed something to cope with the insanity of it all, and that was where music really came into play for the seattle boy.

*:･ﾟ･✧･ crash bang boom: ryder had always found himself to be obsessed with music - specifically the seattle born grunge era and all things rock and roll. he found that the loud sort of aggressive music was the best at drowning out whatever argument was going on down stairs. he dove into the era of 1980’s white snake or 1990’s nirvanna, everything that came before and in between and after, becoming quite the officianto. his favorite thing in the world was getting to pound on the drum kit in the band department at school before his mother came to pick him up from school. he was usually unable to take the bus back home considering he was in detention, often, and had to be picked up later in the afternoon, but ryder had an incentive to be kept late. it was an instrument that allowed him to expression his raging frustration in a constructive way, and the music teacher at his school wasn’t one to limit ryder’s , uh, creativity. he started checking out books from the library to teach himself how to play, stealing drum sticks from school and bringing them back home so he could bang on some pans just to get an idea of rhythms. every single semester he took music as an elective just so he was able to spend more time banging on drums. he started to learn some of the greatest drummer’s solos - john bonham’s good times bad times, keith moon’s who’s next, neil pearl’s the threes - anything that inspired him and was performed by the best. it certainly wasn’t easy, and he had begged his mother every year to help him pay for a drumset, but that wasn’t really a possibility for the family. his mother was essentially on her own after the divorce; despite the court-ordered child support being in place, she very rarely got sent a single check. so ryder had to work with what he had and what he had access to, but that passion for music never went away.

*:･ﾟ･✧･ sweet sixteen: when ryder had turned sixteen, he and his mother had moved down to chicago as she had gotten a job transfer there. she was being promoted to manage the new hair salon mastercuts was opening in the city and the opportunity was too good to pass up. being the angsty little shit that he was, ryder only agreed to move without kicking and screaming if she agreed to help get him into either music lessons with a drumming teacher, or get him his own kit. and considering his mother didn’t want to have to listen to the banging of drums in her own shoebox of a modest home they were able to afford in san diego, she agreed to sign him up for lessons. every summer since he was twelve, ryder had been mowing lawns and had saved up a pretty good chunk of change that helped sweeten the pot so his mother would help get him the rest of the money he’d need. and they just figured out how to make it work, and finally ryder was able to be mentored and taught by someone who actually knew what the fuck he was doing. he started to hang around all of the band and theater kids that he was going to school with since he finally felt that his talent was being fostered and he belonged now. he was a real musician. that interest carried onto social media, as it did for mostly everyone his age, and he started scrolling through his instagram feed and every cover of his favorite artists on youtube. it led ryder to following a lot of kids his own age who were just as obsessed with music as he was, even befriending a few here and there. as soon as he was able to afford his own drum kit, after working endless hours dishwashing and bar-backing at any place in california that would hire his scruffy ass, ryder started petitioning to some local bands and groups to take him on. he was ambitious in only one thing in his life - playing music.

*:･ﾟ･✧･ one night stand: while ryder was pretty lax and even awkward in any other setting, playing in a stuffy bar even in front of three people was his comfort zone. he was lucky enough to be invited to play with a few bands over the years, always lying to say that he was older than he really was just to be let into whatever bar or club the band had booked. even when he was seventeen, he was lying to his bandmates saying that he was twenty one just so that they’d actually consider him. he drove around the most beat up 1999 pick-up truck that carried his kit and his ass to and from school, gigs, work, and for a long time ryder felt like he was living the dream. a kid like him, who grew up in the household that he did, didn’t deserve to be playing at house parties for rich fucks in chicago or dive bars in illinois. he rode with three bands before he found his ‘forever home’, and each one felt just as much like a family as the last, but sometimes even the good shit can’t last forever. bands would break up over the dumbest shit, like whos song was getting performed or wasn’t at a gig, over bigger shit, like someone having to move away or taking on a better opportunity with someone else. and for ryder, he just hated the inconsistency after awhile.

he knew that college was never going to be an option for him, and if he was going to do anything with his life, it was going to be music. it is all he has ever wanted to do with his life, but it hasn’t been easy and no one makes it overnight, even with the internet fame that one night stand was starting to get. instead of getting discouraged, as soon as ryder discovered an advertisement for the employee housing program at the malnati, and he knew what he was going to be off doing. if there was even a chance that he could serve a drink to some music producer, a tech, maybe even a recording artist … a talent manager or agency director … he needed to take the chance. he believe in his talent so very much and he knew that just going from bars to parties wasn’t going to be enough to get signed and actually on a real label that could get his music out to the rest of the world. besides, getting out of mom’s house and a place on his own sounded right, even if he was going to be living in a hotel. it wouldn’t have been the first time he did, and it wasn’t going to be the worst living situation of his life.

*:･ﾟ･✧･ when we started: ryder is insanely passionate about music, his music, and most importantly their band. while he’s a chill dude and understands that playing is as much a hobby for everyone in the group, it’s also something that he hopes to make a full-time career out of some day. ever since ryder was a little kid holling up in his room, trying to ignore the stinging bruises around his jaw, he dreamed of playing sold-out area tours in front of thousands of people and being able to stand there and the crowd in front of him sing back the songs that he had written, performed. he really believes in his band and their potential, encouraging them to write EPs and play whatever shows they could get hired for and to make the album that they’d been talking about for awhile. ryder gets very excitable about music, and it’s what he’s most confident in. while he may be a seemingly awkward or goofy kid otherwise, he’s an intense and confident drummer and that’s where his place of tranquility is despite all of the noise and chaos of playing. he’s constantly studying up on techniques and new drumlines and if there’s ever a time he gets to catch another band’s show, he liked to go see what everyone else is up to just out of curiosity. he’s a huge concert-goer and has been to as many warped tours as possible since he was a young teen. he’s crazy passionate, but he definitely understands that he may not be on the same wavelength as some of his bandmates, and that’s okay. their time will come when it comes, and since having moved out to chicago to be around everyone, he’s come to be really happy with that. they aren’t chasing radio hits and trying to figure out what the market wants - they’re making music that they like, that speaks to them, and they’re all having a really great time together just doing it. his mother is still close enough that he can go see her or give her a shout whenever he can, and he couldn’t care less about what happened to his father. ‘good riddance’ is all ryder would have to say about the man.

*:･ﾟ･✧･ don’t need nothing but a good time: by day, ryder bartends at the malnati making as many tips as possible, and by night, he’s out playing gigs with his band and most affectionately people who have become his best friends. he’s not afraid to throw a punch for any one of them, would also begrudgingly take one for them, too. he’s got a keen eye for which shots they should post to their instagram to gain the most traction, which definitely helps them out. he’s recently quit the nasty smoking habit that he formed looong ago, and now he fills that urge for a headrush with salty chips; it’s been a pretty effective cold turkey quit method, and ryder’s been proud of himself because of it. he’s enjoying himself as he is now, just another angsty kid trying to make it in the music industry, but it’s been something that he’s been able to transition into with the help of the people around him. he likes to have a good time, might take a little while to warm up to someone but once he does, it’s nothing but good vibes from there on out. he’s one of those selfless dudes who’d give you the shirt off his back and wouldn’t even expect a thank you. he’s a really appreciative person and passionate in almost everything that he does. he’s got so much soul inside his bones, and it shows in his music and how he interacts with those he cares for. there’s been a lot of times in ryder’s life where he’s felt shallow, empty, lost. but he’s rather found himself over the years as he’s grown into adulthood and has been able to provide for himself, and while he’s still chasing his dreams, he’s also riding the wave he’s on now and it’s been pretty great. there’s a lightness about him that might not be expected, but at his core that’s who he is.

#malnatiooc #+ ( introduction * . )#for the new fc :~)

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seawoes · 4 years

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PARK JIMIN, HE/HIM, CIS MALE — HABAEK SEO is a child of TYPHON with the power of POISON MANIPULATION and MONSTER CREATION. they were born in 1995 and have been in nemean lion since 2013. with the change, they HAVE GRADUATED FROM the MEDICAL role which makes sense since they’re usually SURFING or GOING ON MISSIONS.

hello! i’m deni. i use she/them pronouns, am over the age of 18, and live in the gmt+9 timezone. i like giving my girlfriend forehead kisses and drinking too many sodas. baek is a newish character, so he may undergo a few tweaks as i develop him in threads. below is a quick outline and i have a few connection ideas. i’m looking forward to writing with everyone! it’s been too long since i played in the greek myth world :3

stats.

name. habaek seo preferred name. baek birthday. june 7th, 1995 ethnicity. korean gender identity. cis male sexuality. pansexual hometown. busan, korea element. air

background. ( abridged for now. adjustments to be made. )

- mother a volcanologist who hooked up with typhon - found out she was pregnant, returned to lecture full time in busan. married her best friend, a fellow researcher, who was baek’s “father” - baek attended private kindergartens and international schools, which made it easy for him when they bounced to new zealand, the philippines, mexico, and hawaii. basically anywhere his mother secured a researcher position until baek was 16. - first monster attack was a huge WTF moment for them. so was meeting a sea nymph and demigod duo who rescued them. - they were directed to nemean lion and had tearful goodbyes - he didn’t feel welcome at nemean lion. especially one his parentage became known around campus and he discovered his ability - baek escapes promptly 2 months into it to find his mom. by that time, she’s settled in cozy with the nymph, who promises to protect them. - they’re able to travel the world again until baek graduates high school. as promised, he enrolls in nemean lion and learns how to better control his powers.

quick blurbs. - teenage years were a lot of “but mom, i’m a demigod” smack! but they adore each other baek talks to her all the time :( - baek learned how to surf in korea, but excelled in the philippines. he actually won a few amateur competitions and considers pursuing a professional career constantly. - currently enrolled in UCLA’s online college as a sophomore. pre-nursing major. planning to apply for the school of nursing soon. - has never met his father. doesn’t know a lot about greek mythology. isn’t super interested in it, either. knows enough since 16 yr old bullies basically used facts about his father & monster siblings as a weapon against him

nemean lion blurbs. - baek chose medical as his track because a) he wasn’t super fond of the idea of fighting for the rest of his life b) he initially wanted to return to the civilian world and be useful somehow and c) there was definitely either a vibe or some self-doubt about his abilities since his father’s, yknow, that monster - graduated from medical in 2014. - in 2017, he went on a disaster of a mission. a near-death, overwhelming experience. he wasn’t able to heal the assigned hero of that mission - one of his best friends - and damaged them forever. he promptly retired from an active healer. - requested a transfer abroad to work as a teacher instead - stuck to international campuses since. most recently stationed in south east asia. - reluctantly transitioned into an active healer role about two months ago when monster attacks became stronger, more aggressive. returned to LA about three weeks ago ( timestamp: from start of RP opening )

powers. - specialties: poison inducement - improved dexterity and endurance, poison and fire immunity - strengths: healing, support, some combat and self-defense - weaknesses: insanity inducement messes with his mind - weapon of choice: crossbow / bow and arrow - doesn’t know about his ability to create monsters yet

* basically, baek will give someone hurt a “good” poison or induce someone into thinking they’re totally safe and healthy, tricking their brain. a placebo affect until they can get to actual safety.

personality.

sun sign. gemini. expressive, sociable and restless, baek’s driven by a sense of curiosity about other people and the world around him - and, to a self-interested degree, a curiosity about himself. he likes spending time with people, friends and family, but can lose interests in conversations quickly to move onto another. a touch irresponsible, but enthusiastic and adventurous when it comes to problem-solving. needs stimulation and freedom.

moon sign. virgo. practical, attentive and energetic. baek understands intuitively that the world is chaos, and sometimes things that don’t make sense just happen - and if problems are complicated, solutions are, too. flips between nervous energy and detailed, hyperfocused work. finds comfort in domesticity or putting things into “order.”

chinese zodiac. wood pig. simple, honest and lovely. sympathetic and understanding of other people’s problems, with a kind and liberal attitude towards life. however, rather temperamental, and he has a tendency to give up if the goings get too tough. tolerant of others, but are sometimes gullible and naive.

hobbies. surfing. diving. spelunking. hanging out at aquariums. meditating. getting tattoos. skateboarding. knitting. hiking. scoping out the best restaurants. hustling at arcade halls. anything he can use his hands with, or requires movement.

physical.

body type. five foot eight. slim, lean build. warm skin. eye color. brown hair color. dyed orange. black natural. piercings. left ear three times. right ear two times. tattoos. mom’s date of birth on the inside of his right wrist. “HUMAN” on the left side of his rib cage. scars of a shark bite outlined around his right shoulder. protective lion’s head in between his shoulder blades. clothing style. a saint laurent paris style, but with a compact, limited closet and more beanies. prefers looser, breezy tops and slides or sneakers.

- smells like salt and sunscreen - body temperature runs higher than average

#. ABOUT ➤ BAEK SEO .#nlintro

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midnight-laceration · 3 years

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Characteristics: Khaya Luca

♦ BODY FEATURES : Scars (LOTS of scars. The most egregious are a cluster on her back around her left shoulder-blade. They look like whip scars. Her arms, legs, hands, and fingers have many scars though which look to have been caused by various wounds. Mostly cuts, however. She has scars on her torso, but generally less so due to the fact one tries to protect their torso in combat.) | Markings (A tattoo of a koi fish curled, swimming in front of a full moon on her left shoulder.) | Scales (…) | Fur| Tail (Long, fluffy, blue) | Paint | Other (...)

At one point or another, one of these things, or more than one of these things, have been part of Khaya’s education. She has a pretty wide education and grew up privileged in that area.

♦ I’VE BEEN : In Love | Hurt | Sick | Abused | Other (…) Everything here and more???

Khaya definitely suffers from major depression as well as what can be considered alcoholism and some drug use. While the drug use isn’t nearly as bad as the alcohol abuse, she does use drugs for all the wrong reasons.

Rules : BOLD what applies to your muse, ITALICIZE what applies under specific circumstances. Remember to REPOST. Feel free to add to the list. Tagging: You’ve already done it @dumb-hat, but I am alerting you as requested. This is my attempt to make this tumblr thing a uh... thing.

#khaya #ffxiv #balmung #ffxiv rp

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jxstiice · 5 years

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Stephanie Beatriz, 32, cis female, she/her. 🗽 looks like that’s AVA BURNS reporting for duty. they’re originally from QUEENS, NYC, so i wonder if working as a DETECTIVE for SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT ever gets old. anyway, i heard that they’re UNDAUNTED but also kind of HOT-HEADED, which is why i guess they always remind me of TIGHT LEATHER JACKETS, WAR STORIES OVER WHISKEY AND CIGARETTES, and A HARD EXPRESSION BROKEN ONLY BY THE PRESENCE OF A DOG

HELLO! I am sara and i got REALLY carried away because i had like 8 hours of boring meetings today. please feel free to ask me for a TLDR! Come plot! I love my girl and i love some ANGST!!

tws: death, assault, war, ptsd

YOUNG & LOVED

Matías and Mariana Burns were high school sweethearts from Queens. they didn’t move far once they married fresh out of high school, to a nice house in Richmond Hill. from there, Mariana worked to become a nurse, and Matías went straight into the academy. they were an eager young couple, but it wasn’t long until their first child came around-- a surprise, but one they took in stride.

Ava was rambunctious, and always wanted to be like her father. she took various martial arts classes growing up, played soccer for a time, her energy never seemed to fade.

Her mother worked as an ER nurse, and her father became a truly prized member of the NYPD, so selflessness and hard work are hard-wired in her system.

Ava is the oldest of three, her sister and her sibling mean everything to her, and she took it upon herself to make sure they were okay through everything. with two busy parents, she never questioned helping out as she got older.

WHEN EVERYTHING CHANGED

When she was 15, Ava's life flipped on end. What started as a normal day at school turned into the worst day of her life when she was pulled out of US History and told her mother had been the victim of a hit and run in Manhattan. she was killed instantly, and Ava felt her world fracture before her.

things were hard after that. once she got back to school, she was acting out. she took the shift in the household hard, and though she stepped up even further for her siblings, instability was setting in. an anger formed in ava she wasn’t familiar with. sure, she was always tough, but after that she closed off.

one day, the same day Ava and Matías had a particularly bad fight, ava hit a breaking point and proclaimed she was leaving. Matías never expected everything to go so badly, even sent a friend on patrol to go follow her. he knew she ended up at a party with friends, called the patrol off, and figured she’d be back in the morning. they had a similar temper, and she’d even sent him a text later to tell him she’d be home.

he was called to the 16th precinct at 3:30am to find his 17 year old daughter in an interview room, borrowing a hoodie and sweatpants with tears dry and fresh staining her face.

the party got wild, and Ava and her friends weren't trying to get too wild. ava wanted to just get out of the house for a few hours. none of them expected to be followed outside the frat house and cornered, but they were. two high school girls cornered by 5 frat boys wasn't going to end well in any of the girls' minds. Ava's years of self defense took over, but it wasn’t enough.

the two men that Ava actually ended up hurting in the struggle went on to press charges for their broken noses, but the truth came out in the DNA. The men took a plea and it never followed them past their community service and fine. Ava didn't recover so easily.

Matías struggled to make sure Ava got the help she needed. she was resistant to therapy and often skipped it. she got more aggressive and outspoken in school. her grades dropped. she graduated, but barely.

FINDING A PURPOSE

By the time Ava graduated from high school, depression was deep and responsibilities of being the oldest sibling of three was setting in. College seemed like a far off dream between her family. Ava running into a recruiter outside her neighborhood boxing gym was pure chance, but it changed everything.

When Ava told her father she wanted to join the Marines, he struggled. On one hand, he saw a fire in Ava that he hadn't seen for a couple years now, and he wanted more than anything for that fire to stay. on the other more obvious hand, the idea of his first daughter going to war was terrifying. It was Aarav's sergeant that finally convinced him. A veteran himself, he saw a lot of similar emotions in young Ava. she shipped off for bootcamp during the first week of September, just a few months fresh out of high school.

In the Marines, Ava excelled. the structure helped her thrive, and her drive was exemplary. from the start, she made it clear she was never someone to be messed with. It brought back confidence she'd lost since her mother’s death and her assault, and she clung to it as she once again became sure of herself.

In 2006, Ava Burns was deployed to Afghanistan to the front lines. she served overseas for 6 years with outstanding performance. her fellow troops called her a tank as she never backed down from running into situations if she knew she could help. Ava was a good soldier. her family was proud, and would welcome her home warmly each time she came.

NOT JUST A SOLDIER

In 2012, Ava and three others from her unit were captured by enemy forces after a roadside bomb caught them off guard.

They were held hostage for two months. during this time, it was everything they could do to stay alive and there for one another. They were physically beat and hounded for answers about the operations of the US armed forces. The three soldiers gave up nothing. All three were rescued.

When rescued, Ava's leg was broken and she was flown home for the recovery. It didn't take long for symptoms of PTSD to set in. This time, though still a little weary, she accepted therapy easier. after all, if being a prisoner of war for two months didn't constitute a little therapy, what did?

things got more frustrating though, and Ava could not hide the symptoms. her higher ups noticed, and Ava was offered an honorable discharge and a purple heart. She was told she would not return to active duty, and taking the leave now would save potential catastrophe on the battlefield. begrudgingly, mostly after her siblings and father talked her into it, Ava accepted. they say once a Marine, always a Marine. Ava doesn’t always feel that too much.

HOME ANEW

Ava's next steps happened quietly. she didn't even share with her family once she decided, simply shared it one day about a month after she was cleared to walk again with no crutches. with her coffee in hand, she announced simply: "First day at the academy today. Exciting, huh pops?"

Matías, was beyond thrilled.

Just like the army, Ava excelled once more, and she stuck out from the crowd in more ways than just her name.

By that point, Matías was a lieutenant at a precinct in Queens and known throughout the NYPD for support for community initiatives, but Ava was firm: never give her special treatment because of her father. she didn't need it, and if she found it was the case, she'd refuse it.

Working as a beat cop seemed like the perfect balance for Ava. She was known in Richmond Hill certainly, and there were many neighbors that welcomed her as a cop warmly. With the slowly growing strife regarding police, people wanted cops they could trust. Ava was one, and prided herself in it. It also offered her the action she'd come to excel at in the Marines.

Fast forward four years, and Ava is hungry. It's never been a secret that Ava's fire made her advance, and after months of weighing, she decided: Ava Burns wanted to be an SVU detective. After her experience, it seemed right deep in her core.

Now, Ava has been an SVU detective for six months. She's constantly searching for ways to excel, but it's harder work as a detective. Now, she's working on balancing her impulsive nature with a more thoughtful process.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

Partner -- TAKEN by BEATRIZ GARCIA

Veterans: I imagine Ava has (occasionally) gone to support groups, as well as just made some friends that served in the past and get it. I’m open to various dynamics, only requirement is your character was a solider at one point or another. Bonus points if they served together!! OR if they were one of the people ava was held hostage with! gimme dat good good angst

Old Partner: Ava was a beat cop for four years, so she’d have had at least one partner! Open to dynamics, lengths, stories, anything!

Serious Ex: This was a relationship that Ava was very serious with, and they maybe even toyed with the idea of marriage. Unfortunately, this would have happened while Ava was recovering from her discharge 6/7 years ago and she was in no place for a healthy relationship.

Flings: Ava is a bisexual queen and copes with things physically. she likes sex a lot and doesn’t put that much seriousness into one night stands. Open for various dynamics, come at me!

Mentor: I’m very very open to the dynamic, I have so many possible ideas. Someone ava’s known since she was little? someone that promised her dad theyd look out for her? her old/current partner? SO MANY POSSIBILITIES!! please just give ava guidance she needs it. so bad.

Childhood friends: Ava’s mom worked at a hospital and her dad was NYPD so I’d absolutely love some people from Ava’s childhood stemming from those!! also any other Queens kids would be cool!

Any! All! Come to me!!

#intro #dd.intro #im so sorry its so long

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theexistentiallyqueer · 5 years

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Sorry to bother, but where do autistic and adhd brains overlap? Because both are neurodivergent (and beautiful, I agree) But how can I find out which behaviour belongs more to me being autistic (got diagnosed this year) and which is adhd? (No Matter What Deadline, after several years in hostile environment (failed university, then call center work) I panic. Hard.) How do I disentangle adhd and autism to find out what strategies to use to function better?

Please don’t feel like you’re being a bother, because you’re not! Honestly the fact that someone is coming to me to ask ADHD questions makes me teary-eyed, because I’ve fought so hard to learn to function with ADHD that people Asking Me Things like I’m a trusted expert just makes my heart grow three sizes, the opposite of the Grinch.

I’m probably not the best person to ask about how ADHD and autism overlap specifically, especially if you’re taking this from an autistic POV. And I’m also not a behavioral expert, which is a very strong preface. But I can (and am very happy to) talk a bit about my experiences with ADHD and how I’ve learned to make things work for my brain.

I’m going to put this under a cut, if that’s okay with you, anon. It got kind of long and I don’t want to overrun anyone’s dash. And you can always, always ask me ADHD questions, and I’ll try my best to answer.

My ADHD tends to manifest specifically in the following ways:

Extreme hyperfixation that has its own varying degrees (e.g., I’m really into Fire Emblem: Three Houses, but I have so lack of interest in Byleth/Claude that my lack of interest feels like an actual void)

An inability to process feelings regarding things other people care strongly about that I don’t. If we’re using the same fandom example: I could rant forever about how Byleth/Edelgard gives me ALL THE FEELS, but if I friend I care about started to talk about Byleth/Claude, I would immediately lose all interest in the conversation and struggle to react in a way that doesn’t present me as a selfish monster who doesn’t care about the person I’m talking to.

I tend to monopolize conversation if I’m given the opportunity because I LOVE getting the chance to talk about my hyperfixations. If someone cuts me off when I’m really into a topic, I get incredibly irritated and have to try to restrain from myself from acting petty in response. The number of times I have smiled my mouth is a knife and said, “ANYWAY, as I WAS SAYING…” is beyond count.

I don’t recognize or remember people until I have something meaningful to associate them with. I also don’t tend to notice things that don’t clock themselves as Important in my brain. I usually describe this as “background furniture.” Even PEOPLE become background furniture. A girl I work with mentioned a person on her team had quit, and I’d literally walked by that person’s desk earlier that day and didn’t notice it was empty, because that person and the entire space they occupied was background scenery.

If something affects or touches me personally, it hits me Very Personally. I had a complete fucking breakdown watching the video of Philando Castille’s shooting, because I heard his daughter crying while she watched him getting shot and went down onto a spiral of personal loss over my own father to gun violence and started to immediately correlate the two. Separating ADHD brainness from my whiteness is complex and hard and (said sarcastically) so, so much fun.

The direct inverse of that are things like: I’m talking to my mom, who’s telling me about a high school friend of hers just got into a horrific vehicle accident and is in the ICU. My mom then goes on to give me regular status updates on this woman I don’t know. I get out of work, and she talks about this woman’s surgery. I get out of work, and she talks about this woman’s family’s attempt to find an adequate rehab center. They find a rehab center, and my mom shows me how her friend decorated her daughter’s room. My mom shows me a video of the girl working with a physical therapist, who gets her to push herself upright with a walker and take her tentative steps. “Awesome!” my brain thinks. “Great!” my brain thinks. All of it spans over several days, weeks, months. I have nothing to do with this constant influx of information. I don’t know how my brain should file it. I don’t know this woman who was injured. I feel for her in theory because no one should ever have to go through that even though so many people do, but I haven’t ACTIVELY PRETEND like I personally am invested in the situation or else my mother gives me Concerned Eyes because I seem to be In A Bad Mood Today.

When it comes to organization, I tend to lean towards hyper-organization rather than hypo-organization. By which I mean I over-organize to combat the fact that ADHD often results in disorganization, and disorganization results in chaos, and chaos gives me COMPLETE PANIC ATTACKS. At work at one point, I had my emails auto-tagging every incoming email based on the email type, on top of tagging for my clients. Every label had a different color, and it all made sense to me, because I’d made it. When my team had cover my stuff on a day I was out, my inbox was such a horror show that it left them feeling drained and distressed.

Let’s talk about socialization! I have a rocky relationship with my childhood best friend. When I discovered social justice in college, I started picking fights with everyone over everything Problematique. The first major fight I had with my best friend at the time was because she felt I was over-aggressive towards a mutual male friend of ours. She was probably right, because I know the kind of bullying behavior I later developed. I thought I learned from it. After the 2016 election, I messaged her on FB, thinking I had a sympathetic ear, to say that seeing her mother post constant messages of support for Trump and sharing stuff dismissing Trump’s sexual assault allegations was particularly hurtful considering I’d told my friend that my mom had been sexually assaulted.. I’m not going to share what she said, but she wasn’t in the wrong. We didn’t talk for several months after that.

Speaking of her! When she started dating the guy she’s now married to, at one point I asked her if they’d had sex yet. I asked it because I thought it was a thing you were Supposed To Talk About as friends, and also because I was, in a way, morbidly curious, because I’m grey-ace and queer. She confirmed that they had, but I still felt so icky and uncomfortable about that for so long afterwards. It was only after I started to understand that I’m not cis and not allo that I really understood why: I was forcing myself to perform what I thought female friendship was based on how it’s portrayed in media, and it’s only once I began to understand that I’m on the ace spectrum and that I’m nonbinary that I really started to understand how forced mainstream conversations of attraction are.

I’m loud! I’m loud! I’m loud! I’m loud all the time! I live with my mom and I socialize with my mom and when we’re in public spaces and I’m talking about something that interests me, she always, always, always feels like she has to shush me. What makes it ironic? If there are other people being loud around me, I can’t function. I can’t process the noise. It’s EVEN WORSE if they’re speaking in another language, because if it’s English I can process the words at least, but if it’s another language, it’s just pure, inescapable sound that I know has meaning but can’t intuit, and if I can’t understand something, that’s as bad as dying.

From what I’ve read about autism, here are ways I THINK my ADHD traits overlap with autistic traits:

I can’t read facial expressions. I think I have a better concept of emotional nuance in facial expressions than someone who’s strictly autistic, but I’ll still panic when I see a smile that isn’t bland enough. RDS (rejection-sensitive dysphoria) will kick in. They hate me, they hate me, they hate me, is the track my brain will play on repeat until I’ve drunk myself into oblivion. Whenever someone smiles, I mistrust it immediately.

Eye contact is incredibly fucking frustrating. I understand that it’s expected, but it’s SO UNCOMFORTABLE. Why do we need to stare into each other’s eyes to understand one another? How can you people write whole treatises on the sanctity of locking gazes and finding an instant intellectual bond without realizing that eye contact that’s not called for is personally invasive?

I can’t understand flirting vs not flirting to the point that I’m absolutely paranoid someone is flirting with me, at which point I usually become hostile if I think they ARE, because DON’T FLIRT WITH ME. TALK to me!

I hate, hate, hate unsolicited physical contact. If I’m in a state of over-expression, I hate it even more. I’m not physically withdrawn, because I love hugs, and cuddles, and human touch. But when I’ve spent the entire day listening to other people talk and I have to walk into a room where people continue to talk, if someone touches me, it’s fucking No-Oh-One.

Someone is interested in a thing I’m interested in. We’ll use Persona 5 as the concept, because this honestly happened recently. I talk with the guy whose desk is across from mine about Persona 5 all the time. He’s also excited about Royal. I started going into my Sophia theory that I’ve really only lobbied at @softspokensansa. I could see, I could viscerally see, the interest drain from his expression. BUT I HAVE AN IDEA SO I WILL TALK ABOUT IT ANYWAY, and then afterwards I felt incredibly resentful that I was being filtered through a cookie-cutter drain.

It’s painful–it’s really painful!–to try to talk about my spiritual ideas with other people. I have a side blog I just started and am preppy myself to share, and I’m absofuckinglutely TERRIFIED everyone is going to write me off without looking at what I have to say. IT’S THE RSD AGAIN! Nothing I ever said has actually mattered before, so why should it now?

I feel, constantly, like I’m halfway between a point of reality and a point of something. What that something is is indefinable, but regardless of it, I exist.

I’d like to direct you to two very positive youtubers I know; I meant to do this earlier, but now feels right in terms of how I’ve written: How To ADHD and Amethyst Schaber.I credit both of them in helping me find a safe place with ADHD before diagnosis. There are stories other than yours that matter.

I wish you the best, anon! If you think you’re autistic and ADHD: given the comorbidity between the two, you probably are! And ADHD is just as beautiful, complicated, and misunderstood as autism is.

If anyone reading this can speak to living as both autistic and ADHD, please respond so I can lift your voice. And to my anon: you’re beautiful completely. I hope my story has helped you in its anyway, and I hope that you find yourself at a place of peace. It’s a struggle to get there, but it’s worth it, every step of the way.

#anonymous #thanks for coming to my teq talk #gaydhd

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rcfcel · 5 years

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* / 𝔰𝔲𝔯𝔭𝔯𝔦𝔰𝔢 𝔟*𝔱𝔠𝔥𝔢𝔰 ! bet you thought you'd seen the last of me ! lol apparently i like to challenge myself and just haD to bring in my new man so yeah hi , meet raf / rj ! i'm v excited for y'all to meet him — fair warning , i'm starting from scratch with him cause i got #inspired so i apologize if the info below is a mess ! pls love us .

( tommy martinez, cis male, he/him ) i just saw RAFAEL MICHELENA walking down the streets of provincetown the other day playing CHATEAU by BLACKBEAR out loud. rumor has it that the TWENTY THREE year old is GENEROUS, but can also be AGGRESSIVE — overall they’re a MAVERICK. they remind me of LEATHER SEATS IN BLACK CADILLACS, CIGARETTES SMASHED TO ASHES IN ASHTRAYS, & MALT WHISKEY POURED OVER ICE. ( lenny the pooh, 5, antarctica, she/her )

—— * / 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔟𝔞𝔰𝔦𝔠𝔰 :

full name : rafael johan michelena

nicknames : raf , rj

age / dob : twenty3 / february 14 , 1996

gender : cis male ( he / him )

sexuality : openly bisexual

occupation : firefighter

hometown : provincetown , ma

label : the maverick ( an unorthodox or independent-minded person )

—— * / 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔰𝔱𝔬𝔯𝔶 :

so dear rafael here was raised by a single father after his mother passed away shortly after he was born due to complications during labour . raf’s father never really wanted kids as he’d been wanting to focus on his paramedic career and was worried he wouldn’t be home enough to be with his family , but his beloved wife had assured him everything would work out in the end — which , of course , it didn’t really because he was left alone with a baby boy he didn’t know how to take care of .

his dad struggled for most of raf’s childhood , having to juggle both his demanding career and an even more demanding child , but with the help of close family and a very generous family who lived next door and took care of raf whenever his father worked night shifts , it all did work out in the end , just as his late mother had promised .

despite his father being away so much , raf developed a very strong relationship with his father . when he was young , his father was away a lot because he was just starting in paramedics so he got stuck with the less desirable shifts — but as rj grew older , his father moved up the ranks of his career and finally made it into a position that didn’t keep him away from home as late , allowing the two to spend some actual time together .

from a young age , raf knew he wanted to save lives like his father . fun fact : one night when he was young and staying over at the neighbour’s house , he drew a little picture of his father in uniform and then drew himself wearing a little uniform too — the neighbour showed this to his father when he picked him up and the grown man damn near cried .

raf has always been super proud of his dad for chasing his dreams and taking on each obstacle that came his way .

at first , he wanted to follow in his father’s footsteps and become a paramedic — which he did , for a short while . after his school graduation , he went to school to get his emt ( emergency medical technician ) certificate and then worked to become a paramedic , by the time he was twenty one he was working the same job in provincetown his dad had been when he was young .

after about a year and a half , raf realized he wanted more . as a paramedic he worked closely with the provincetown firefighters and had always found their bravery inspiring . he got along with the crew well and one night over drinks he confided in them about possibly following along their career path instead . of course they all jumped to say do it , while also giving raf good advice and facts about the job , but nothing they said scared raf away from it — if anything , he was even more excited .

so fast forward a few months , and a very gruelling entrance exam and training period , and he switched out his paramedic uniform for a firefighter uniform and joined his buddies in the station .

it’s been about a year now since he first put on that uniform and rj truly hasn’t looked back since . the hours are rough and the job is laborious , but it’s also super rewarding and he wouldn’t change it for the world .

currently , he lives in a cozy ass apartment in provincetown on his own , although he spends many nights at the station when he’s on duty so i have this headcanon that his apartment is like .. hotel raf lmAO like need a place to crash and get away from shit ? there’s a spare key under the mat .

—— * / 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔦𝔫𝔰𝔦𝔡𝔢 :

labels(s) : the maverick , the hedonist , the contingent

maverick : due to his father’s extraneous job , raf grew extremely independent at a young age . when he was finally old enough to stay home and take care of himself , he honestly thrived .

hedonist : working in such emotionally challenging jobs has taught raf to really live life to its fullest and treasure every moment . he never takes anything for granted and is almost always looking for a fun time during his days off .

contingent : while his independence is clear in how he can take care of himself and make his own decisions , raf is incredibly dependent on those around him for support and companionship . he struggles with being alone and is in constant need of company and friendship .

traits : generous , charming , aggressive , protective , passionate , diligent , indulgent , short - tempered .

aesthetics : leather seats in black cadillacs , thick ringlets curling around chiseled features , black jeans with a lighter in the back pocket , cigarettes smashed to ashes in ashtrays , malt whiskey poured over ice , callused hands stuffed in the pockets of a leather jacket .

soundtrack : honestly , i’ve been listening to blackbear during raf’s entire conception so you can literally just listen to his entire discography to get a feel for his vibe .

personality : while he inherited his father’s passion , drive , and general kind demeanour , raf definitely made a name for himself with his slightly mysterious aura at first glance — maybe it’s the mostly black wardrobe , the cigarette that usually dangles from his lips , or the way his brow creases whenever he listens to someone speak like they’re the only person in the universe , he’s a little intimidating at first — but honestly , anyone who really knows him would laugh at people who comment on his mystery : “ yeah , i thought he was gonna be a total asshole at first , could not have been more wrong though ” has definitely been said numerous times about him .

raf’s actually probably the biggest teddy bear in ptown . his heart is somehow bigger than his hair and he welcomes everyone into his life with open arms ( after a short trial run to make sure they’re not gonna fuck with him of course )

he truly loves his friends more than anything . i’m not kidding when i say his apartment is hotel raf cause legit if u need a place to crash , even if it’s 4 in the morning , you can knock on his door and he’ll likely even give up his bed for you .

wears his heart on his sleeve , probably a little too much for his own good , but thrives off of honesty and trust so he’s definitely your go to guy if you’ve got shit going on .

also your go to guy if you need someone’s ass kicked . he’s a firefighter for crying out loud , he drinks preworkout like it’s water and could probably bench the entire snack pack lbr .

he’s a big old hopeless romantic too — he was born on valentine’s day after all .

—— * / 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔠𝔬𝔫𝔫𝔢𝔠𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫𝔰 :

once again , let me scream into the void that i am open to pretty much anything . lay it all on me , give me your worst and just rIP my heart out why don’t you . but ! below is a list of ideas i brainstormed up for raf

i really want someone from the family that helped take care of him when he was little !

neighbours , childhood best friends , childhood crush / first kiss

gym buddies PLS give raf a buddy he can call up to go play basketball or challenge to a weight lifting comp LOL

past / present hook ups ! raf’s an emotional guy but his job is stressful as fuck and he def needs soME sort of way to unwind .

exes ! mayhaps they dated in high school and broke up cause theY went off to college while raf stayed back in ptown .

brOS OHMYGODPLS give me joey and chandler , jake and charles , troy and chAD

a brother / sister friendship pls ! someone he can be way too protective of .

platonic soulmates ! my fav !!

an angsty flirtationship / skinny love type deal .

—— * / 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔥𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔠𝔞𝔫𝔬𝔫𝔰 :

his apartment is suPER masculine . like exposed brick walls , brown leather couches , stainless steel appliances , dark oak tables and shelves , probably big windows all over the place cause he loves natural sunlight . and the whole snack pack 100% knows where the spare key is in case of emergencies ( insert that one scene of friends where monica’s like “ i gave you that key for emergencies ” and phoebe’s like “ we were out of doritos ” )

he’s got a lil grey pit bull named lily that he saved a few months ago ! she’s his pride and joy .

like .. rarely uses his phone . he’s got all the social medias , but only really checks it when someone tags him in something or whatever . prefers to call over text cause texting annoys him , he’s an impatient fuck .

definitely is the pack’s lil doctor . he’ll always unwind and have a fun time , but will 100% be on alert at all times for accidents or anything bad that could happen . and if it does happen , he’s first on the scene — i mean , why wouldn’t you want a licensed paramedic that looks like tommy martinez icing your sprained ankle right ?

he’s never really travelled much , aside from the times he’s been called to neighbouring towns / cities during big emergencies and such with his crew . he’s got major wanderlust and really wants to travel to venezuela and such , but he’s also perfectly content staying in ptown for now .

he’s a celiac — idk why , i just wanted to give him some sort of weakness cause he seems too perfect rn .

#snackpackintro #—— ` . ooc !#i didn't really proofread so i apologize for mistakes

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homenum-revelio-hq · 5 years

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Welcome to the Order of the Phoenix, Amos!

You have been accepted for the role of non-biography character FABIAN PREWETT with the faceclaim of Sam Heughan! Your application was so much fun to read! I loved how much attention you gave to the various layers that make up Fabian, who he is and how he’s ended up where he is now. I look forward to seeing him try and balance his problems against the greater needs of the Order. I am so excited to have you as part of this roleplay!

Please take a look at the new member checklist and send in your account within 24 hours! Thank you for joining the fight against Voldemort!

OUT OF CHARACTER:

NAME: Amos AGE: 22 TIMEZONE: GMT ACTIVITY LEVEL: It’s hard to say. I’m a freelancer working in theatre, so some weeks are hell and I work 70 hours, and others are 9-5 so I could be on in the evenings and weekends. Other weeks I might be on show call in the evenings and so could be on during the day. I’ll definitely be able to do 1 reply a week to keep up with activity, but I really want to do more than that, so if I can I will! ANYTHING ELSE: No triggers really. As for experience, I’ve been rping on tumblr for maybe 8ish years on and off, mostly Harry Potter, Fabian is one of my most played muses, I love him to pieces.

CHARACTER DETAILS:

NAME: Fabian Prewett AGE: 30 (willing to change this to fit with Molly and Gideon’s ages when/if they become taken characters) GENDER, PRONOUNS, and SEXUALITY: Fabian is a cis man and uses he/him pronouns. To differ from this course has never occurred to him. He is very comfortable in his gender, he doesn’t so much as revel in his masculinity as let it naturally steer him. He doesn’t shy away from laddish encounters in pubs, or rowdy sports events, but he isn’t what you’d call aggressive or arrogant. He (somewhat subconsciously) considers the role of protector and provider a man’s role, despite having many females in his life that contradict that line of thinking. He has a desire to fill these roles, and every failure to do so is a knock to his confidence. He has never had a problem with his body or the way he looks, further than being teased for his ginger hair, or the insecurity that typically accompanies puberty. As far as he’s concerned his body matches perfectly with the way he sees himself in his mind’s eyes, he has never wanted to alter anything about it that couldn’t be achieved by working out or good hygiene.

Sexuality is slightly more of a grey area for Fabian. He liked girls just as much as any other guy he went to Hogwarts with. He had girlfriends and flings, enjoyed the sex and the summer romances, fell head over heels for his first love and had his heart broken, just like most other guys he knew. The problem was he also tended to fall head over heels for guys too, except he didn’t get an opportunity to explore that side of things nearly as openly or frequently as he did with women. Some days Fabian is 100% accepting of himself and his attraction to men, he’s ready to shout it from the rooftops, tell his friends and family, step fully out of the closet. But most days he is unwilling to admit that side of himself. He’ll hear a comment from a stranger, or read an article in the newspaper, see something that makes him believe there could be nothing worse that openly sharing his sexuality with the world. Maybe someday he’ll get around to confiding with those closest to him, although he suspects they already have their suspicions, and actually, that suits him just fine, as long as they never confront him about it.

BLOOD STATUS: Pure Blood HOUSE ALUMNI: Gryffindor ANY CHANGES: None

CHARACTER BACKGROUND:

PERSONALITY:

Fabian is an intelligent guy, although his grades at Hogwarts wouldn’t necessarily reflect that. Fabian is not a books smart, he struggled with the subjects that were largely reading and writing, memorising dates or formulae. But when he could get his hands dirty, something clicked in his brain and it all made sense. For this reason, he excelled in Herbology and Care of Magical Creatures. He did well with the practical elements of DADA and potions, but struggled with the theory, and absolutely flunked subjects like History of Magic.

Fabian is also pretty good at reading people. He can tell if someone is uncomfortable or hesitant to engage and can usually put them at ease. If someone is upset, he’s often the first to notice, and when someone has good news he can tell by the look on their face before they’ve even said a word. This is more of an unconscious skill, not something he works on deliberately, but a natural gift. However, he isn’t quite so in tune with his own emotions. In denial about a lot of things in his life, Fabian will ignore his own feeling and lock them away until they either disappear or he can deal with them conveniently.

He is of course, courageous and brave, he will unthinkingly put himself in the direct line of danger if it means he’s protecting somebody else, especially someone he loves. Unfortunately, this means he tends to act before he thinks. Sometimes, in battle, that’s the line between life and death, the split second of hesitation before throwing a hex could cost him his life. But most of the time it just means he gets himself into trouble.

He also has a great sense of humour. Fabian loves a joke or a prank, even if he ends up being the victim of it. In these dark times, he whole heartedly believes laughter is the best medicine. He knows it can’t fix everything, but at least it can patch up the wounds until tomorrow. If he can make someone laugh in their darkest hour, then he considers his job done. Fabian’s tendency to goof around also means that he masks his true feelings with jokes and gags, rarely letting on if he’s having a tough time or struggling with something. He hates to show weakness, and jokes are a good way of distracting people.

BRIEF OVERVIEW OF FAMILY:

(These are my headcanons but very willing to talk to the writer of Molly and Gideon and come to group decisions about what their family is like)

Fabian has always felt loved and safe in his family. It came unconditionally and in abundance. I see Fab as the middle child, Gideon being the oldest sibling, then Fab, and Molly being their younger sister. Whatever the order, I always see Fab as the younger twin. I don’t think he ever had to fight for attention from his parents, but his boisterous nature and endless jokes probably came as a way to ensure at least one parent was giving him their undivided attention. I think the twins got in trouble a lot, not seriously, but just day to day misbehavings that seemed like the end of the world when they were 5, but now seem trivial. I think they would fight to take the blame to save the other, which of course resulted in both of them being told off anyway.

I think he was sheltered in a lot of ways. He had two parents who loved him and loved each other. They kept him safe from the evils of the world for as long as they could. Any fights his parents had would happen in hushed tones after all the children were asleep. Any financial issues they were having were never made apparent to the children, they had their favourite snacks and the desired birthday presents every year, even if it meant their parents had to tighten their belts. The fact that they were purebloods was rarely discussed. The Prewett parents didn’t buy into the whole ‘sacred 28’ philosophy and so it wasn’t important other than to recognise that they were exceptionally privileged to live as purebloods in a world that was likely to favour them, and that some people weren’t as lucky. It wasn’t until Hogwarts that Fabian properly realised the impact of blood status and the injustice of it all.

I see Fabian’s father as a tough man with a stern face, rarely discussing emotions, never saying the ‘I love you’s out loud, but rather showing it by working long hours to provide for his family, by turning up to every quidditch game, by quietly boasting about his children’s achievements to his co-workers, by the worn photo in his wallet: his three children and his beautiful wife, in the garden underneath the summer sun, giggling at some long forgotten joke. He was a humble man, handsome in a weathered kind of way, and absolutely devoted to his family.

His mother was soft in all the places his father was hard. Always a hand to stroke Fabian’s hair as he fell asleep, a lap to curl up in, a kiss on the cheek to embarrass him in front of his friends. She was a wonderful cook, even with the sparsest ingredients. When she baked the children always got to lick the spoon. She would indulge them in their silly made up games for hours, and then read them stories after they had finally worn themselves out. She had a hard time saying no to any of their desires, which is where their father had to step in. I don’t think she was necessarily stunningly beautiful, but beautiful in a way all loving mothers are in their children’s eyes.

So I think they had a very happy childhood, and were free to be children. They had the kind of happy home that they got homesick for when they were at Hogwarts, and were excited to return to at the holidays.

One of my big headcanons is that their mother died a few years back, maybe just after Fab and Gid graduated Hogwarts, so their late teens/early twenties. I think it was illness, not a gracious one that leaves you frail and elegant and lets you drift off in the night, but the harsh aggressive type that robs you of everything and still won’t let you go. I think it would have broken the family; a set of perfectly balanced scales left swinging wildly trying to find a new equilibrium. The three children learned to heal, with each new marriage and birth, the mourning for their mother getting easier to bare, but for their father I think it stayed fresh no matter how many years passed. He became reclusive and depressed and now only attends the most important family functions with a lot of pestering from them all.

OCCUPATION:

Fabian currently works as the conductor on the Knight Bus. It is a bit of a fall from grace for him, but for anyone who asks, he’ll just tell them he wanted to escape the office, meet more people, less paperwork and less pressure. The truth is he was fired from his last job in the Department for Magical Transportation. After months of minor offences such as coming in late, filing the wrong forms, or turning up to the wrong room for the wrong meeting, Fabian finally broke the last straw when he splinched himself whilst teach an apparition course at Hogwarts. Besides giving a few teenagers nightmares, he ended up in hospital for a few days and his boss made the decision to let him go. The reason for all the fuck ups is that Fabian has slowly become more and more dependent on alcohol. It started, as it usually does, as getting trashed at the weekends to wind down from a hard week, and then that turned to drinking on weekday evenings, and then to slipping some fire whiskey into his coffee in the morning, a then of course he couldn’t turn down a pint at lunch times on slow days. At this point Fabian is very rarely not intoxicated to some degree, and his boss noticed. He was fired and now he works in a job where no-one really notices if he’s been drinking if he’s careful about it. With the way Ernie drives, everyone else is just as likely to fall over as he is.

ROLE WITHIN THE ORDER/THOUGHTS ABOUT THE ORDER:

Fabian didn’t think twice about joining the Order. At first it felt great, a secret organisation of rebels, fighting for all that was good and right. But after years of fighting, the hope drained away and it became a grinding business. He soon realised his naivety that the Order would be all about adventures and swinging in to save the day, that after a little while they’d defeat the death eaters and be regarded as heroes. He would never leave, it’s barely even an option for him. If he’s hardly keeping it together while he’s part of the Order, knowing he’s doing all he can to defend his world and the people he loves, he would fall to pieces entirely without it. But when the good days get fewer and further between, it gets harder to keep his head above the water.

He was against the ranking at first, but he sees the sense in it now, especially with the whispers of double agents. They aren’t going to win this war as a bunch of rag tag optimists, they need to fight and organise like any other army would. I think Fab would probably be mid-level, he’s older than a lot of the members and so been there longer. He might have been higher up if he could be trusted more, but the alcoholism means he slips up, even if he’s trying to keep his dependency a secret.

SURVIVAL:

Since losing his job at the department of magical transportation Fabian has been able to fly under the radar with more ease.It also means he has a lot less money. He is currently in between permanent bases. Sometimes he’ll rent a room in London, and more often than not it’s a tiny, run down, room with leaks in the ceiling and no heating, but it’s all he can afford. As soon as he gets paranoid he’s been followed home, or being watched by someone across the street, he’ll pack his bags and move on. He spends a lot of nights on the Knight Bus anyway, and he can sleep there when he’s not working, and every so often he’ll spend a couple of nights at the Burrow.

He is also low on money because a lot of his salary goes on booze. If he’s not working on the Knight Bus, for the Order, or visiting the Burrow, he’s likely at a pub or bar getting smashed. And even when he is working, he’ll have bought the cheapest bottle of alcohol he can find from the nearest off-licence and be stealing sips of it whenever he can. But it all adds up and some months he can barely make rent on whatever squat he’s holed up in at the time.

He survives out of sheer stubbornness some days; others he can see the last glimmers of hope and knows it’ll be worth it if he can just press on. He visits the Burrow and see his nephews and realises that failure simply isn’t an option. Unfortunately, right now his survival methods might also be the death of him.

RELATIONSHIPS:

Some of the strongest relationships he had before the war are now some of the most tense, probably because they mean the most to him. Gideon, Molly, Arthur and the boys will always be the most important people in his life, and he loves them with his whole heart, but it’s fair to say the war has strained even the strongest bonds. He is terrified of losing them, terrified he won’t be able to protect them when it comes down to it. He won’t admit to himself that his alcoholism makes him a danger to them, he’s hoping they haven’t noticed, but the difference in him must be obvious to anyone who truly knows him.

Some of his best relationships now lie in the people he has become close to because of the war. Members of the Order who are always up for a laugh and a drink at the end of a long night’s watch. Who understand the horrors of the war, but haven’t had to witness the change from a carefree young man, to a haunted husk of a person. If they can pretend for a few hours that the nightmares don’t exist, then what’s the harm? These are the people Fabian will spend most of his free time with. He might not confide in them, but at the moment, they are getting the best of him.

Romantically Fabian is terrified of starting anything serious. He’ll have one-night stands, short flings, especially with people outside of the war effort, but nothing more than that. Apart from anything else, he’s still struggling with his sexuality. It’s true that he could still have open and loving relationships with women, but the knowledge that he’s hiding such a big part of himself, makes every relationship feel disingenuous and so all romantic relationships suffer as a consequence.

OOC EXPLORATION:

SHIPS/ANTI-SHIPS: I don’t really have any anti-ships for Fabian, I’m open to anything with chemistry. I’m really interested in exploring his closeted bisexuality, and so I’d love to see him romantically involved with another guy, but I’m not excluding any hetro ships at this point.

WHAT PRIVILEGES AND BIASES DOES YOUR CHARACTER HAVE?

I think Fabian grew up incredibly privileged and sometimes he doesn’t realise that until someone points it out to him. He’s getting better at seeing it and using it to help others. Now he’s a blood traitor it’s not so much of a privilege, but he can still see that he has it better than muggleborns.

Most of the time his biases are similar to the general populations’, views he’s picked up because they are generally accepted, and he’s never thought to challenge them. So yes, he probably doesn’t like werewolves, because as far as he knows he’s never met one and all the stories he’s heard are bad. And he probably thinks house elves don’t deserve any more rights than they have because having an entire race as your personal slaves hasn’t registered as something that might be wrong. He definitely has some internalised homophobia. He couldn’t pin down exactly what his problems with it are, because if he met a person who was openly gay, he would accept them immediately, but he can’t accept it in himself yet. Anything more complicated than being gay in the LGBTQ world is probably beyond him and would take a little minute for him to understand.

I think generally as soon someone pointed out why his prejudices are wrong; he would accept it instantly. He wouldn’t hold on to these old views, he is extremely versatile in this manner, and almost eager for his ignorance to be corrected.

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? After I left my last rp I fell out of the habit of writing everyday and I really miss it. I love the marauder era and I really missed writing it as part of an rp community. Plus, I am super into the fact that this is an AU rp where the ending isn’t set in stone.

PLOT DROP IDEAS (OPTIONAL): You know I love a good masquerade ball, not sure how it would fit into the plot, but they are super fun. I would love to see Fab’s connections at the department for magical transport come into play. I’d also love to explore him really fucking up on a mission because he was drunk. Maybe some undercover work for him. Kidnappings are always fun, either kidnapping death eaters or members of the Order being kidnapped.

ANYTHING ELSE? Not that I can think of.

EXTRA FOR NON-BIO CHARACTERS:

PAST.

Fabian had a pretty sheltered and privileged upbringing as a pureblood male, the war made this vibrantly obvious to him incredibly quickly. He joined the Order as soon as he could, not one to sit around and let others put themselves in danger for the things he believed in and the future he wanted. But years at war takes its toll on everyone. Fabian, like many, turned to alcohol. Although it numbed the day to day pain of the war, it made him sloppy and careless with his own safety. He lost his job at the ministry and ruined a number of his relationships.

PRESENT.

Fabian’s day to day life now consists of a number of things. Working as a conductor on the Knight Bus. The shifts are flexible, the responsibilities are few and that suits him fine. It means he can devote more time to the Order, the second thing that consumes his waking hours. The daily grind of the war effort may be getting him down, but he would literally have to be dead before he surrendered. In between work and the Order comes his family and friends, the main reason he fights at all. Seeing his nephews can be the highlight of his month, Gideon and Molly are the rocks he so desperately needs. Accompanying all these things is the alcohol. He drinks in the evening with friends, then has a night cap at home, a splash of whiskey in his morning coffee to tide him over to his lunch time pint. One day it’s all going to catch up with him and ‘one day’ might not be as far away as it once was.

FC CHOICES: Top choice: Sam Heughan. Other choices: James McAvoy, Sam Claflin

#homenumaccepted #marauders rpg #hp rpg #literate rp #bio rpg

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dangerwatson · 5 years

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SO, MS. WATSON. YOU WANNA MAKE A DIFFERENCE.

It’s ya girl Lin back on my ‘ let’s cry about a beautiful woman together ’ bs. Here’s MJ ! It’s long, but that’s to have all her relevant information in one place should you ( or me more than likely ) need to hit it up for future reference. I’m excited to have her here ya’ll.

BASICS.

Given / Birth Name : Mary Jane Watson Nickname / Preferred Name : MJ, Red Alias(es) : N/A Birthdate / Age : June 19th 1991 / Twenty - Seven Place of Birth : Montoursville, Pennsylvania Current Location : Little Italy, NYC Gender Identity : Cis Female Sexual / Romantic Orientation : Disaster Bisexual Ethnicity / Race / Cultural Heritage: African - American && German Marital Status : Single Occupation : Field Reporter && Political commentator for Weekly Review Religious Beliefs : Agnostic. Raised Christian.

CHARACTERISTICS.

Height : 5′8″ Weight : 135 Body Type / Build : Entirely Average. Could stand to go to the gym, but honestly who has that kind of time. Don’t compare her to fruit she hates that. Eye Color : Green Hair Color / Texture : Auburn. Worn natural, 4b curls and all. Sometimes braided, sometimes weaved, sometimes in bantu knots or covered by headscarves. She’s very particular with her hair - touching it can and will lead to physical harm against the perpetrator if unwelcome. Recognizable Features / Scars : Big ol’ dimples and a slight cleft chin. Dusting of dark freckles across nose and chest. Speech Patterns / Accent : Has a deeper voice, boarding whisky worn. Because she’s moved around the majority of her childhood MJ has no discernible accent, giving her a modulated tone that’s perfect for clear annunciation across media platforms. Languages Spoken : English, French, ASL Powers / Skills / Abilities : No powers, however MJ has a nose for good stories, and tends to follow wherever they take her. Overall Health : Good.

RELATIONSHIPS.

Order of Birth : Youngest Number of Siblings : 1 Father’s Status + Relationship : Phillip Watson, alive. An abusive alcoholic, former High School English teacher. No relationship amends have been made. Mother’s Status + Relationship : Madeline Watson nee Rains, deceased. A starry eyed dreamer, former actress turned stay at home mother. Left Phillip after he struck Gayle, bounced both children through various family members. Passed away shortly after from congenital heart failure exacerbated by stress and lack of access to treatment. Sibling Status + Relationship : Gayle Watson, older sister by almost five years. Unlike MJ, continued to have a relationship with their father. Married her schoolyard sweetheart and had two children. He divorced her around the same time MJ graduated high school, leaving both sisters ( and her nephews ) living under Aunt Anne’s roof. They’re nearly estranged. When she visits her aunt and nephews, both sisters make a point of keeping their conversations short -- if they happen at all. Loyalty / Affiliation : Outwardly neutral, though subject to change behind closed doors.

PERSONALITY.

MBTI : ESFJ Hobbies : Dancing. Doesn’t matter where, when, why or how. Catch her pulling an n*sync routine in her living room at 4 PM on a Tuesday. MJ also has a knack for exploration. There are a lot of ( read : free ) things to do around the city and magically finds them all. Who cares if you have no interest in the Fungi Festival, there are booths everywhere for a quick way to kill an afternoon. Tried needlework one afternoon, didn’t stick and now there’s an abomination of mutant looking cats hanging above her bathroom door. Bad Habits : Smoking. Fixing / hyper - focusing on her hair when uncomfortable or stressed. Jumping head first into the dating scene only to find out it’s the shallow end. Providing 20 second long fart sounds whenever someone asks “how are you?” Taking care of others before taking care of herself. Three Positive Traits : The silent Mom Friend. Allow me to explain : MJ is traditionally that bitch^tm making sure you get home okay after hanging out, she ensures your soul is as well nourished as your body. For all of her outward party-girl aesthetics and a forced mean girl perception on her by others, she makes sure her friends are in good headspaces. That they feel encouraged to follow their ambitions and ultimately celebrate every success no matter the size. It’s the type of selflessness that she’d wanted for herself growing up, so I’ve labeled it as her BEST trait. She’s incredibly outgoing. An extrovert through and through, getting her battery charged by being around people. It’s what makes her an attractive personality. When in a battle of small talk, MJ not only listens and remembers those small shared details but she knows how to keep the conversation going without making it seem like a chore. I love how in tune she is like that, girl vibes hard with new and old friends alike. Finally, MJ would make a professional bargain hunter blush. She grew up poor and as a direct result is extremely careful about what she’s doing with money. And yes, being financially responsible during these trying times as a Millennial trying to earn that bread is pretty much a given good quality. We all wish it wasn’t, but here we are. Three Negative Traits : MJ is stubborn to a fault. When she digs her heels into something it’s hard to get her to stop until a desired outcome is achieved ( or undesired, event depending ). While this is usually reworded as a positive asset —- being so DRIVEN and MOTIVATED —– that’s simply not the case with her. She’s lived through all consequences resulting from this inability to budge and none of the supposed rewards. Been fired from more jobs than she’d care to admit for telling former bosses where to shove unrealistic worker expectations, or coworkers where they can file passive aggressive bullpucky. She’s also incredibly stunted emotionally. As mentioned, she’s a silent Mom Friend, but reciprocation of her actions isn’t met with as much of an openness as one might expect. MJ keeps her feelings to herself, and it usually builds up until she suffers a full scale breakdown triggered by something mundane like … dropping a fry or seeing a lady bug stepped on. Decompressing is a word in her vocabulary, for sure, but it was easier to partake in as a 20 year old than as a near 30 year old with responsibilities and bills to pay. Picky puts it in palatable terms, but MJ knows what she likes and how she likes it. When she doesn’t, then she’ll quickly find a preference. In the meantime we’ll say she’s very particular about what styles she likes to wear, how her make up is, how her hair looks, and over all what image she’s presenting to a general public. It’s a habit she hasn’t been able to shake. Moral Alignment : Neutral Good

ASSOCIATIONS.

One Song : Dead and Lovely - Tom Waits One Quote / Piece of Art : “Beware; for I am fearless, and therefore powerful.” One Fear : Following the Watson Women path of horrible no good very bad mistakes and poor life decisions. One Strength : Persistence One Object : Breathe Right Nasal Strips One Place : May’s kitchen One Food : Garlic One Scent : Cinnamon. One Lucky Charm : Old tattered friendship bracelet

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Pretty typical “American Dream !” 50′s family dynamic. Everyone looking great in their Sunday best photos, father with a steady job, stay at home mom to save on daycare, two daughters and a stray cat named Sir Stinkybottom.

Father started facing emotional breaking points brought about by lack of what he considered satisfactory income and inbound midlife crisis. Turned to drinking, ( turned into a right train wreck. )

Mary-Jane, Gayle and Maddie hopped from various family member’s couches to crash for a couple of weeks at a time during the separation process from Phillip. This lasted a year.

Maddie passed away when MJ was around 10 and Gayle 15, Gayle instantly taking up the role of Mother Figure to MJ’s wild child foil. MJ maintains she doesn’t remember all that much about her mother while Gayle remembers everything and that becomes a point of contention.

Father returns into their life. It’s messy, he eats away at their still developing ego’s like the cancerous human blob he’s chosen to become. Their Aunt Anna, who they live with, intervenes when she can.

Gayle gets the fuck outta there by marrying her high school sweetheart, moving to the midwest and popping out two adorable munchkins named Kevin and Thommy.

MJ has the pleasure of dealing with their dad alone for the next five years. Which she does by a little thing called home avoidance. Garners the reputation quickly as a party girl at Midtown, someone ready to go anywhere and everywhere at any time.

Began solidly working around fifteen to help Anna out, sometimes in Diners, sometimes in retail. Her ability to sell her brand began early and honed with surgical precision during these years. All currently reflected across media platforms where she became a 2010 influencer ( and paid for little more than modeling ).

Started college at seventeen, typical move. Took 6 years for her to finish as she paid her way through without loans. The last thing MJ wanted when finally breaking out of Queens was a student dept choker. Graduated at 23 with a dual bachelors in journalism and political science.

Bounced between larger broadcasting industries for a few years as an underpaid intern before growing concerned by their lacking criteria. The burnout was real.

Tirelessly sought employment at her favorite ( but SMALL ) news agency. By luck of the draw she was screen tested and hired on for a slot as field reporter.

She’s been with Weekly Review since. Now having two years under her belt ( still extremely Green in her industry ), she’s pushing for higher scope investigative journalist pieces. And for once, they’re not telling her no.

#united task 001 #united intro #mentioned briefly :#tw alcoholism #tw parental abuse

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gothicgremlins · 4 years

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The Worst 80′s Movie--Yes I’m talking about 16 Candles.

trigger warning for discussions of sexual assault at date r*pe, I will mark the paragraph where it’s discussed in detail but there are mentions throughout the post.

I am disgusted.

I am revolted.

I honestly couldn’t go more than 10 minutes at a time without pausing this wreak of a film. I wish I could say I have no idea why this film is considered a “classic” when not only is the movie a hot mess but Pretty In Pink is the same movie, (it even has Molly Ringwald!). The reason it’s a defended “teen classic” when there were far better 80′s movies is not because it was earlier than other (far better) John Hughes classics like Ferris Buller’s Day Off (1985), Breakfast Club (1985), and as mentioned Pretty in Pink (1986) is because of everything that makes me hate it.

Some people want to punch down, and laugh at abuse. And they feel like they should be allowed to do it if it’s in some magical historical context (which, of course, 16 Candles isn’t in because other movies at the time might have made dubious consent jokes but the good guys didn’t date r*pe people, or have racial stereotypes to the aggressive extent that 16 candles does). I’m not blind to the often problematic nature of 80′s comedies, however, problematic is too nice of a word for this dumpster fire. I think the only movie to ever make me me this uncomfortable was Gone with the Wind--a 1939 movie adapted from a a book written three years prior and romanticizing the antebellum south and racism. And that movie is talking about one of the most shameful and polarizing periods in American history. (AND it’s held up by current racists as some ‘golden period’ in America, which is revolting enough on it’s own) So to see that level of awful in a ‘fun’ ‘romantic’ ‘comedy’ is ... something.

The bellow paragraph discusses sexual assault and r*pe in detail.

Some other 80′s movies flirt with the idea of sexual assault or attempted r*pe, but it’s usually not to the extent of 16 Candles, and the sexual assault is attempted by the bad guy. The example that’s coming to mind for me is Back to the Future (1985), in which there is a scene where Biff--the BAD GUY-- attempts to assault Marty’s mother and must be stoped. Since the bad guy, the antagonist whatever you’d like to call him, is attempting the assault it’s automatically framed as bad, and something the main characters need to stop from happening. Another example would be The Breakfast Club (1985) (Oh, Hi again John Hughes is there something you need to confess?) in which John the resident bad boy is under a table and looks up Claire’s skirt and maybe, we’re given no on screen confirmation of this, touches her inappropriately. This is also disgusting, and casually confirming rape culture, but significantly less than the full on date r*pe scene in 16 Candles. Here’s the thing, rape culture and excusing boys for hurting women was indeed a ‘thing’ in the 80′s, but that doesn’t mean we should look the other way when the romantic lead of the movie hands his drunk girlfriend off to a boy he knows will r*pe her (after said boy giving implicit permission to do so), tells her the boy is him, then leaves to chase down a younger girl he’s never spoken to but knows she has a crush on him.

I wish I could have just watched Better Off Dead (1985) again instead of this. Now that’s an 80′s classic I can get behind defending even with it’s problems.

**I realize some boomer might come across this (are they on tumblr now???) and say I’m just an over-sensitive millennial who wants to safety-pad everything but first off, I’m gen-z not a millennial, and second off my dad is horrified by this movie and I’m pretty sure he technically counts as a boomer so there. (Not even, my dad is horrified by in now, he told me he was horrified in the theater when this was released, so yes, in the historical context of the 80′s for a white, cis, straight man this movie is bad.)

#16 Candles #John Hughes #god kill me now #the worst movie #the worst 80's movie #post 3 #assignments

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ryderxmms · 4 years

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tw: alcoholism, abuse, angst

* : ･ﾟ･✧･ RYDER STELLAN SIMMS ･✧･ﾟ･ : *

— && guests may mistake me as ( brenton thwaites ), but really i am ( ryder simms + cis male + he/him ) and my DOB is ( 3/3/1997 ). i am applying for the ( bartender ) position as part of the EHP and would like to live in suite ( 207 ). i should be hired because i am ( relaxed & creative ), but i can also be ( despondent & temperamental ) at times. personally, i like to ( write music, play the drums & guitar, go skateboarding ) when off the clock, but that won’t interfere with work.

this is another ... long read .... and for that i am so sorry listen the muse just be pouring out sometimes but like

#malnatiooc #another long one *sniffles* love y'all #+ ( introduction * . )

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spacestationtrustfund · 7 years

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DTC Les Mis

Because I can’t shut up about this wonderful production. (And because @pilferingapples is a horrible enabler. :P)

I was watching the Dallas Theatre Centre’s 2014 production of Les Mis again today, and as always crying a lot over how brilliantly Liesl Tommy adapted the musical for the modern day.

The thing about Dallas Les Mis that hits home particularly perfectly for me is that every situation feels real. The abuse of the workers, the lovely ladies, the prisoners, the students, the children -- it’s all the same stuff we see on the news. And the characters are all people I’ve seen before.

Caveat: I grew up in one of the poorest parts of London, with a working class family; I’m mixed-race, queer, not cis, and not male. Watching DTC LM is oftentimes physically painful because of how real it feels.

I’m going to break this down into bullet points so that I can pretend I’m organised.

The police.

Javert is a white cop, immaculately dressed, hidden behind sunglasses and a perfect, protecting uniform. Valjean is a brown prisoner, dressed in filthy rags, humiliated and treated like he’s less than human. Javert hardly even looks at him -- he doesn’t respect Valjean enough to treat him like a human being. This is not new. This is a story that we see on the news nearly every day. This is a story that every community that’s not white and wealthy has. Arrested for stealing a mouthful of bread, and given a nineteen-year sentence: this is not fiction; this is reality.

I have seen people like this. Every time Javert came on stage, I thought of them. The way he’s dressed, the way he carries himself, the way he interacts with the prisoners -- Javert is representative of the police force, and it’s not in a good way.

When Javert sings “Stars,” it’s not just about his crisis of faith. It’s a song about how his original belief (the law) has been damaged by a new idea. The fact that a prisoner, a criminal, a brown Muslim man, has saved his life is literally too much for him to handle. Because he doesn’t see the prisoners as human beings.

It’s sickening and it’s real.

THIS SCENE. The cops are dressed in full riot gear, complete with helmets and batons and pistols and bulletproof vests. The opening scene shows a black-clad cop beating an unarmed prisoner, who repeatedly tries to protect himself by covering his face, cries out in pain and begs for the abuse to stop, only to be kicked and told to shut up. The prisoner curls up on the ground, arms over his face, huddled in a ball, while the cop beats him with a baton.

This is not fiction. I don’t know how many times I can say it. I’ve cried more times watching DTC LM than I have watching any other production (which is saying something). This is something I’ve seen happen, something people I know have had happen to them. The prison-industrial complex and police brutality are not fictitious. It’s painfully, agonisingly real.

Fantine.

Fantine looks like this:

She’s a woman of colour. She’s not conventionally attractive. She’s not skinny. She’s not well-dressed. She’s the face of society.

Most productions put her in an ethereal white dress that makes her look angelic. She often has blonde hair and pale skin. She’s delicate and romantic and beautiful.

But here she’s not like that.

The Lovely Ladies are mostly women of colour, and most of them look similar to Fantine. These are the single mothers, the women regularly going to food banks, the women working three jobs, the people considered a drain on society, a burden. They do the jobs that no one else will: cleaning, cooking, selling their bodies.

There are millions of women like this in the world today, who have stories similar to Fantine’s. This is not fiction.

Look at the body language in this scene: he’s leaning forwards, aggressive, getting right in her personal space. She’s shrinking down into herself, eyes lowered, trying not to be noticeable. Because he’s white, and a man, and she’s neither of those things. Because she doesn’t have the control. Because she can’t refuse for fear of being imprisoned, raped, beaten. Because she has a daughter who needs her.

She’s not easy to care about. She’s the woman you see in cheap dollar stores whose Food Stamps card gets denied. She’s the woman you see in Goodwill, buying cheap clothes. She’s the woman who takes the bus even when it means she has to wait, or to walk from station to station, or to leave hours before she needs to be at her destination. She’s the woman you pity. She’s real.

Cosette, les Thénardier and baby Eponine.

I have seen women exactly like Mme Thénardier. Her gaudy clothes, her over-exaggerated movements, her voice, her body language, the way she walks. The way she coos over Eponine but shuns Cosette. Les Thénardier are representatives of real people, people you might actually encounter. I’ve seen her on public transport, clutching her plastic grocery bags. Loitering outside a dollar store, smoking, mascara overdone. Yelling at her children to stop doing something, then turning around and being saccharine sweet when they obey.

Even baby Eponine looks like the kids I used to play with in the streets while our parents were either working or sleeping. Everything about les Thénardier is familiar because it’s real.

M. Thénardier, with his patched and colourful clothes, his sneeringly jovial attitude, his loud voice and overwhelming presence -- he’s easily recognisable. I’ve seen people just like him, time and time again.

The ABC.

Watching the police attacking the barricade has been too much to watch many times, and I’ve had to pause the video and do something else until I stop shaking. It doesn’t just look real, it feels real.

The Amis are students, university-age, young and hopeful and bright. They’re diverse, determined, and deliberate. And the police slaughter them.

I know these people. I am one of them. I have been to protests and marches and demonstrations where the cops attacked unprovoked, where riot police were called on groups of unarmed kids, where we were arrested even if everything we were doing was legal. This isn’t fiction.

Enjolras and Marius, respectively. They’re kids. They’re in their mid-twenties at most. They’re my age.

They’re fighting to change the system, and they’re killed for it.

In the original novel and subsequent musical adaptation, it’s often difficult to understand the point of the revolution without prior background knowledge of the politics of the mid-1800s. But in DTC’s production, the students hold signs with familiar slogans -- FAIR WAGES 4 ALL. PEOPLE BEFORE PROFIT. They are modern, they are relevant, they are this generation.

And they die for what they believe in.

It’s not just a story.

Eponine.

Marius and Eponine are a sharp contrast. Look at how he’s dressed (suit, tie, jacket, slacks), how his hair and beard are obviously trimmed, how he looks professional and respectable. And look at her -- her braids, her too-thin blouse, her cut-off jean shorts, her bracelets, her jacket. I dressed like her for years.

And she moves like she’s something feral. She’s grown up in poverty, having to fight tooth and nail for what she wants. She’s willing to bite and kick and scream. The world has abused her, and it shows.

She’s been abused, but she fights. And the converse is also true: she fights, but she’s abused.

You know those posters you sometimes see at the checkout lanes in grocery stores, or the adverts on the television, the ones that show pictures of children who need housing or food or some other resource? Eponine isn’t cutesy like that. She isn’t the adorable, doe-eyed child whom you could help, with a donation of just 25 cents, because every little thing helps! She’s bruised and battered and vicious. She’s wild.

She’s not easy to care for.

Marius.

Marius after the barricades -- injured, traumatised, trapped. He doesn’t know how he escaped, he doesn’t feel at home with his grandfather, he isn’t comfortable in his own skin. When he sings “Empty Chairs at Empty Tables,” it’s heartbreaking.

He is A UNIVERSITY STUDENT. He’s in his early twenties, and he’s been caught up in the middle of a massacre. No fucking wonder he has PTSD; his friends have been murdered.)

Marius and Cosette are absolutely adorable. (This isn’t quite relevant, but I felt it was necessary to say anyway. LOOK AT THEM.)

And the end -- oh god, the end. Police in full riot gear shooting down unarmed students and children with machine guns. Gavroche, who looks to be about eleven in this production, is shot with machine gun fire.

They’re just kids. They’re just kids.

Haven’t you seen this on the news? Is it familiar yet? These are the same stories that have been told over and over. Except in Les Mis, it’s fictionalised.

But the characters could be real people. They’re not romantic (or Romantic) heroes and villains from the nineteenth century -- you can’t sweep under the rug their morality issues by claiming that things were different then! This is the present day. This is today. This is happening right now.

I’ll end this with the author’s prefix from the novel itself (translation mine):

So long as there shall exist, by laws and means, a social damnation artificially creating hell on earth, and confounding divine destiny with human fatality; so long as the three problems of the age, the degradation of man by poverty, the degradation of the woman by hunger, the atrophy of the child by night, will not be solved; so long as in some areas social asphyxia is possible; in other words, and from a still wider point of view, so long as there will remain on earth ignorance and misery, books of the nature of this one will not be useless.

It’s not useless yet.

[Pictures from here. DTC LM video here. My other posts about this production here. I also recommend reading this post by @pilferingapples for a similar discussion.]

#cw: mentions of: police brutality; racism; rape/rape culture; abuse; death; state-ordained violence; everything associated with such.#I tried to articulate how everything made me feel but I don't think I can really convey how much this production means to me #***#meta meta meta #les mis en abyme #Dallas Les Mis #pilferingapples #pilf you just need a tag at this point honestly

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