#my current list of issues is. uh. its a lot

[casual-eumetazoa]

hi does anyone have ideas for ways to occupy your brain so that it doesn't blast intrusive thoughts 24/7. activities need to also be not super brain heavy and able to be done in bed if needed. for now I'm playing a lot of mobile games and watching a lot of youtube but it's getting repetitive and starting to lose the effect. thank in advance

[vertumnanaturalis]

so uh. arts not been arting for me the last few months, lots of complicated issues at play with that, but my exo brainrot is unending and I've taken to designing npcs in the sims when I feel the design need but art is shrimply not happening. These ones are of varying degrees of canon-ness and importance, pretty frequently picked at random or because I previously made a family member or partner of theirs.

I tried to group them together by family or age or work relation but god does Tumblr not like large images so forgive me for the spam. I'll add names/pronouns/relevant ages under them; Strato-side kids closest to Sol's age will have 3 designs, each while Strato-side teenagers between Tammy and Kom's ages will have 2 each.

Under the cut if you dare (warning! Spoilers mentioned & extremely image heavy)

Also uh. you will notice that a few of these people aren't on the current npc list or don't match with it's info. Long story short its getting some refining and that included some new kids and other changes that required a lot of pulling things out from the roots. one of those things playing into why arts not been arting while.

Anywho;

Arroyo - he/him - ages 12 / 16 / 19 - The younger son of the Stratospheric's original Chief Steward, a future member of expeditions, a convienient and accidental scape goat for people to reason away Dys's crush on an unseen pretty boy, though they don't actually have any strong opinions on one another

Simplicity "Plic"/"Lis" - she/her - ages 12 / 16 / 19 - Lazy girl born and raised in the creche, supposedly she helps out in the depot, she might "date" Nomi down the line (but by date I mean "we say we're dating but I think we might just be hanging out because neither of us know what to want or expect from a romantic relationship", there's no hard feelings after it ends) if Nomi doesn't end up with Rex or Sol

Peregrine "Penny" - she/her - ages 11 / 15 / 18 - A perfectly nice girl, but fades away in the crowd, she likes to tease the other kids a little too much, one of the passionate romances referenced in the endings where Cal doesn't settle down with Sol Tammy or Anemone, it is not a pretty breakup

Evanescence "Evan" - he/him - ages 11 / 15 / 18 - The spoiled only child of two older parents, a prolific momma's boy in childhood but a heartthrob with a bad reputation later down the line, another one of those passionate romances mentioned in Cal's ending text, with his being the last before Cal settles down with the farmer from the Heliopause

Philosophy "Sully" - they/them - ages 10 / 14 / 17 - The only child of a single father who works in engineering, loves a good game of sportsball but has no interest in the rest of what the garrison offers, the middle of Cal's three passionate romances and the only one to end on good terms

Opulence "Opal" - she/her - ages 14 / 19 - Friendly and absentminded, she can never resist a good piece of gossip, she dreams of starting Vertumna's first offical news source, her oldest child is born about a year after Echinacea (and Sol might even deliver him!)

Vertex "Tex" - he/him - ages 14 / 19 - The older son of the ship's original Chief Steward, a punk who likes to get dangerous with the wildlife and a tendancy to take things too far

Tempest "Pem" - she/her & they/them - ages 13 / 18 - Rebellious older girl whos behaviors only gotten worse since losing a father during the Stratospheric's crash, rude and obnoxious to the adults but always has a soysweet on hand for the kids

Chrysocolla - they/them - ages 13 / 18 - creche-born kid and resident class clown, the smart kid who doesn't put in the effort after seeing the younger geniuses around them, takes a painfully long time to confess to their best friend

Coriander "Cory" - he/him - ages 13 / 18 - Quiet and plain-looking boy who helps out in the kitchens, he struggles to stand out next to his sisters, feeling like the lesser triplet for not being identical

Scallopini "Pina" - she/her - ages 13 / 18 - A cheerful girl who both has more energy than the rest of her family combined while still remaining total chillax, started dying her hair blue so people could tell her and her sister apart

Amaretto "Ame" - she/her - ages 13 / 18 - A meek but passionate girl, she feels like she was born in her sisters contrast, struggles to find her sense of self when the most unique thing about her is that she's got nothing unique at all

Falchion "Kion" - he/him - ages 13 / 18 - Teenager who seems desperate to find his place in life, often making dangerous mistakes in the process

[Left] Hyacinth "Cici" - she/her - age 17 - A young sniper from the Heliopause, the future Chief of Security in timelines where Sol and Anemone are not and Vace hasn't handled his issues yet

[Right] Lunation "Luna" - she/her - age 19 - Previously the Heliopause's current doctor-in-training, a catastrophic brain injury during the crash has drastically changed her life and put her on indefinate medical leave

[Far Left] Champagne "Champ" - he/him - age 9 - a young boy who starts out eager to grow up and become a soldier, but might find a different calling in life with help [Middle Left] Schnapps - he/him - age 40 - A cook from the Helio who takes the culture shock better than most, has a weekly card game with Nomi's dad [Middle] Crocus "Cro" - she/her - 38 - A cook from the Heliopause who prays in secret that her children do not die child soldiers [Middle right] Affogato "Affie" - she/her - age 13 - One of the teenage soldiers who follows Vace around, she's desperate to impress the older kids and will cruelly treat others like stepping stones to do so [Far Right] Meringue "Meri" - she/her - age 6 - The last child born on the Heliopause, she's destined to become a doctor when she grows up, she first gained an interest in medicine during gene therapy like Tangent

[Left] Harpsicord "Harrie" - They/them - 51 - An actual rocket scientist that ensured the rocketship got to Vertumna, Saga's doting wife and Evan's adoring Mada

[Right] Sagacious "Saga" - She/her - 46 - A sweet and loving auntie from geoponics who remains painfully oblivious to most well-known gossip, her casual tendancy to spoil and coddle her son drives Flulu up a wall

[Far left] Hibiscus "Hibi" - she/her - 35 - One of the surveyors in charge of rescues and it's acting emt, a control subject born from the same series of augment tests as Tonin, she's suited more to space than the planet the same way he is, Vertumna terrifies her daily and she fears for the futures of her teenage triplets

[Center left] Rumination "Rumi" - he/him - 46 - A talented guitar player who enjoys lying to children and is in a committed relationship with the bit, works in rescues with Hibi, holds the technical title of "Former Chief Surveyor" as he was the presumed next-in-line when Imbroglio abbruptly retired a decade prior, although he only held it long enough to laugh himself sick and walk out the door, he's the sole reason Utopia's accent is like that

[Center right] Paprika "Prika" - she/her - 37 - Mechanic in charge of expeditions equiptment and transports, has a hair trigger temper with certain subjects and a habit of spraying offending teenagers with the hose, the irony of her student/trainee Thicket being the biological-via-donation child of her partner and later her own biological-via-donation child joining expeditions are both frequent source of jokes for awhile

[Far right] Brassica "Braz" - she/her - 39 - One of the construction workers who had trained for that job specifically, has a lot of pratice mediating problems that her partner's anger issues cause, got on the ship by pretending to be in a relationship with a friend and convieniently "breaking up" once it was clear they were never going to form a family unit

[Far left] Revolutionary "Lulu" - she/her - age 28 - primarily a geoponics farmer, an on and off member of the greater geoponics area wlw polycule, in a queer platonic relationship with Blip

[Middle left] Sorbet - she/her & they/them - age 27 - a steward who primarily works in the kitchens, another on and off member of the greater geoponics area wlw polycule; she was the egg donor and surrogate for Benji (the young doggy boy npc)

[Center left] Habitation "Hab" - he/him - age 26 - one of the ships dedicated creche parents; part of a closed chain polycule of 4 people (no overlap with the greater geoponics area wlw polycule); loves his job but resents ship administration for passing him and his family unit over during the last round of children born in space, yet making him feel pressured into agreeing to surrogate one of the other children

[Center right] Oblivion "Blip" - he/him - age 26 - an engineer in space but shoved into more general work after landing; loves his best friend but her polycule stories scare him a little, you will never see his entire face, but if you did he could easily pass as Dys & Tang's relative despite not being related at all, the fourth youngest person to leave on the Stratospheric

[Middle right] Optimism "Tim" - he/him - age 26 - stuck to janitor duty in space but also shoved into other jobs after landing, one of the few people guaranteed to live to Sol's 20th birthday, the third youngest person to leave on the Stratospheric

[Far right] Jubilation "Jubee" - she/her - age 26 - same deal as Blip; she was the surrogate for the last child born in space (Enigma, the girl with the rainbow hair), and is still recovering physically and emotionally when the game starts; her twin sister Jamboree died before she left, but only one of them was ever going to be picked for the ship, she can't remember her sister's face anymore; the second youngest member of gen 2 after Utopia

[Far left] Coralline "Cora" - she/her - age 28 - the ships fourth dedicated creche parent on paper, she's frequently pulled to help on the farms after landing, a consistant member of the greater geoponics area wlw polycule

[Center left] Pyromania "Sparky" - she/her & they/them - 29 - Originally just a part time security officer, her soldier duties quickly begin outweighing her cultivator ones, she started dying her hair like that when she found out the meaning of her name and keeps it another month every time someone calls it tacky, it's been 12 years; another consistant member of the greater geoponics area wlw polycule

[Center right] Curarine "Curie" - she/her & they/them - 32 - A pharmacology researcher doomed by the narrative, the youngest person on the Stratospheric chosen for her skills rather than genetic diversity, she quickly disapointed Instance with her undriven personality, another consistant member of the greater geoponics area wlw polycule

[Far right] Unity "Nita" - she/her - age 31 - The only one here who exclusively works in geoponics, she was four seperate farming wlw until the latest revamp forced me to compress her down into one, the last consistant member of the greater geoponics area wlw polycule

[Left] Mangosteen "Maggie" - she/her - age 30 - Maggie's death when the Strato lands is unavoidable (as her infant twins Whimsy and Praline fill the role of "orphans from the wormhole crash" during babysitting), once a frequent member of the greater geoponics area wlw polycule but had been avoiding the dating scene after a really messy & very public breakup of her throuple with Yuzu and Cinnamon, she was a creche parent and a hydroponics farmer on the ship

[Right] Yuzu - any pronouns - age 31 - Yuzu doesn't 100% use the term wlw but does work in geoponics and either is currently or has previously been dating the same overlapping circle (though they've also been avoiding dating, but mostly because the rest of the polycule "doesn't want to pick sides"), they avoid Maggie's children like the plague

and that would be it for tonight lads, it is now night'o'clock and my hands are starting to hurt, I think I got all the right info down but if not I'll fix it tomorrow or whenever I notice theres a problem. If you've gotten this far I hope you've had fun looking at some of my little guys

[sillygirl-sketches]

I immediately interested in the Hot Topic AU (?) Feel free to talk about it like a lot I will listen. I have a lot better things to do but i'd rather listen to this

AW YAY glad you’re interested!!

it’s 2005. michael is sitting on the couch watching reruns of “friends.” money is tight. working as a security guard has its perks (hey, after they got past trying to kill him, talking to the ghosts of the poor kiddos dad murdered & reconnecting with evan past the mortal plane isn’t too bad), but the economy is taking a downturn. it’s looking like he’ll need an extra job to pay the bills as he searches for william.

tired of “living in shadows,” michael misses interacting with people! but uh oh, yeah…almost forgot the issue here: he’s a purple corpse semi-preserved by remnant. ever the rebel, he remembers how he loved alternative fashion as a teenager and always pushed boundaries with what he could get away with wearing before dad would raise an eyebrow. he misses expressing himself, and despite his small wig collection (what, can’t an undead thirtysomething have some semblance of dignity?), he yearns to feel like himself again. agh, there’s no way he’d be able to get his old life back…

he pulled out his laptop (his prized possession: a clamshell iBook that he scrimped and saved for) and opened Yahoo, skimming through HotJobs for available job listings in retail. occasional rotting flesh was a liability in food services anyhow, so he’d have to survive the endless reruns of “since u been gone,” while restocking the uggs in aisle 4. ugh…

wait a minute. “hot topic” at the red cliffs mall? hmm… maybe that could work. he’d vaguely heard of the current emo wave. he’d watched all of invader zim when it first aired (even signed a petition to nickelodeon to not cancel the show), participated in a my chemical romance fangroup on facebook, and even though he’d been out of his element with the current alternative scene, perhaps he could re-enter society after all? when was the last time he gave someone a band recommendation? when was the last time he debated with a real live person on whether sex pistols or the clash were the superior punk group?

with a skeletal grin of excitement, michael hit “submit” on the application. obviously, he was loyal to his quest to untangle the mysteries of the fazbear franchise—but a bit of extra cash on the side couldn’t hurt, right?

[skrunksthatwunk]

HI IT'S SQUISHY fic ask game time:

F: Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

R: Are there any writers (fanfic or otherwise) you consider an influence?

X: A character you enjoy making suffer.

:3

YAHOO HI SQUISHY TY FOR THE ASK >:33

ok uhhhh uh uh

F: i think if i had to choose anything, it'd probably be the cat petting circle scene from and who do you think i'll be (without you)?, because i am. really really bad at juggling more than like 3 characters in a scene and this has FIVE and it's still really fun to read, at least for me. it's dynamic, though admittedly the attention still mostly falls on kuwabara and yusuke (sorry keiko </3 i wish you were more prominent in this one but alas) everyone carries some weight. i'm also not great at understanding (and thus writing) anger, so yusuke's bubbling frustration through the scene is like.. kinda cool to me. (a/n: eikichi is kuwabara's cat lol)

i'm also including another two from this same fic bc i think they're neat as well :)

(i'll put a transcript of the screenshots at the end under the read more)

honestly, i love writing yusuke's dialogue no matter what he's saying, so this fic's got a few moments i'm very fond of, but didn't include. anyway it's the only good thing i've ever written (<- exaggerating, but it's probably my favorite fic i've written, and maybe favorite prose piece)

i also remember enjoying some of the dialogue between sagawa and majima in tough love for loveless things, and i assume i liked a lot of the stuff for i long for you and your expert hands, but i... haven't revisited that one in a long time (idk why but i'm a little afraid to?? i haven't forgotten it though), so i couldn't point to anything specific really ^ ^'

I: hm... i think i overindulge in characters just talking about nothing, at least when it comes to my writing. if i like them, i like hearing them talk about nothing, and it tends to bloat scenes and drag on, i figure. i also tend to gravitate towards really specific intensely described points of imagery that barely come up again and totally break the flow of the scene (oops). in terms of guilty pleasures in reading, uh...? i'm kind of a sucker for werewolf stuff because i got that dog in me. im drawing a blank ig sorry <3 OH i've always been hopelessly fond of whump / hurt/comfort / sickfic STUFF. legit since i was a child. i like it when they're out of it i like it when they're woozy. and anything with dumb hijinks and/or slapstick is good to me. comedy's hard and i like seeing idiots be idiots. and really introspective/inner monologue heavy pieces are mmmmwah for writing and reading

R: oh man. whatever i'm currently reading often ends up influencing my writing in noticeable (to me) ways. one time i was writing smth for my fiction writing class and i typed out a sentence that felt at once like smth dr seuss would write (you'll never guess what unit my children's lit class was on) and a line from lolita (because that's what i was reading at the time). it's a mashup that worked weirdly well. ANYWAY to actually answer the question, the little prince ruined me as a kid, and a lot of the way i express sadness and emptiness is channeling saint-exupery there. currently, arkady martine and andzrej sapkowski have been influencing my scenery descriptions in particular, because that's what i was most recently reading, but earlier this year i remember cormac mccarthy's the road finding its way under my pen a lot. for really flowery stuff (i don't think you see it much in my fics, but it's not Never), i think of alfred tennyson's maud quite often. this is not a conclusive list im just empty brained :P

X: ohhohohohohhh. god help me but i love making all of them suffer. to love something is to vivi/dissect it. currently kuwabara is the one i'm putting through the most though (<- channeling personal issues into this orange guy), but majima and kiryu were always lots of fun to break down >:). perhaps that's the real answer to the guilty pleasure section

[SCREENSHOT 1]:

“Hey, why’s she goin’ to Kurama and you and not me?” Yusuke complained, pouting at Keiko.

Kuwabara piped up. “Maybe it’s ‘cuz they have manners, unlike some of us.”

“Or patience,” Botan offered.

Yusuke stuck out his leg and prodded Kuwabara’s arm. “Yeah, and how’re your manners workin’ out for ya? You still look like someone’s been playin’ tic-tac-toe on your hands or did she become a saint overnight?”

“Shut up, Urameshi.”

Keiko spoke up from her spot on the floor. “Aw, I think she’s just sweet. Right?” She put her chin on her folded arms and gently rubbed at Eikichi’s cheek. With a warm smile, Keiko turned her head into her arms further, squishing her face, openly endeared. “Even if she bites sometimes.”

“Finally, someone gets it,” Kuwabara moaned. “Keiko, tell Urameshi that for me, will ya?”

Yusuke didn’t buy it. “If she was sweet she’d be sweet to me, too.”

“Benevolence is nearly always conditional,” Kurama said, leaning over to rub Eikichi’s ears. “Perhaps she senses your standoffishness and simply chooses not to engage with someone who does not seem to want her.” Kurama’s brilliant green eyes swept back to Yusuke for emphasis. “You two may have that in common.”

“Wh—?!” Yusuke spluttered a bit, before settling on, “Watch it, fox boy.”

“Aw,” Botan giggled, “Yusuke, it’s alright, you know. Some of us just have an animal-like charm. Meow meow!” She hooked her hands like paws.

“Right, and I’m saying Eikichi’s not so charming. I mean, she’s been ignoring you, too, Botan, whaddyou think?”

“Oh, she’s just lovely! Simply adorable,” Botan cooed.

“Heheh, looks like you’re outnumbered, Urameshi!”

[SCREENSHOT 2]:

Rocking his chair back lazily, Yusuke noticed Kuwabara’s scratch-laced hands and whistled. “Damn, Kuwabara. It’s kinda beating you up, huh? That cat o’ yours. You look like you just fought me, only smaller.”

“For the last time, Urameshi, Eikichi’s a she! Quit it with the it crap or I’ll knock you into next Sunday brunch.” He jabbed his chopsticks at Yusuke pointedly. “And I don’t think you could get any smaller.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. She’s beating the shit outta you. But what’s with that? I thought kittens were s’posed to be all cute n’ cuddly.” Yusuke swirled his drink thoughtfully before taking a swig.

“You’ve never had a kitten, have you, Urameshi?” Kuwabara deadpanned. He had the right to do that now that he was a cat-rearing expert, as if he hadn't learned it very recently himself.

“No. ’M not really crazy about animals. Neither's my mom.” Under his breath, Yusuke added, “Knowing her, that’s probably for the best.”

“Wh—? How?!” 

Yusuke shrugged.

Kuwabara huffed. “Ugh, she’s teething right now, okay? And I haven’t got her a scratching post yet. She’ll grow out of it, you’ll see.”

“Whatever you say, man. Just try not to lose any limbs waiting for her to get manners, arright? Don’t wanna make our fights even more one-sided. That’d just be sad.”

“Yeah, right, Urameshi.” Kuwabara puffed out his chest. “Eikichi could take two o’ my limbs and I’d still wipe the street with ya.”

“Hey, try beating me with four limbs first, tough guy.”

The conversation devolved into threats and bickering from there, culminating in little more than wrinkled uniforms and mussed hair-dos, and one final exchange.

“You haven’t even met her, Urameshi, so how could you know what she’s like?”

“‘Cuz you’re carryin’ the proof right there, stupid! Look, don’t take it so personal. I just don’t feel like spending all day roughhousing with someone that far beneath my weight class, even if she is the precious little angel you say she is."

[SCREENSHOT 3]:

Yusuke lounged on the floor, Eikichi sitting on his chest and staring down at him.

“What’re you starin’ at, Stinkass?”

Kuwabara scoffed loudly, fluffing out the pillow Yusuke would use.

Yusuke smirked at him. “Oh, I’m sorry, your highness, I left my manners at home.” He cleared his throat. “What are you staring at, Her Royal Majesty the Queen Stinkass?”

“Man, why'dya only pick mean pet names to give ‘er?” It came out a bit harsher than he meant.

“What?” Yusuke began to sit up, but stopped when he remembered Eikichi’s place on him. He dropped back down and shut his eyes lazily. “These aren’t pet names, they’re, like, insults. That I don’t mean.”

“So ‘Stinkass’ is your idea of an affectionate nickname?”

“Gee, you don’t have to make it sound so damn girly. I’m just callin’ her that ‘cause I like her.”

“Ooh~ so you like her, huh?” Kuwabara sat up on his knees and—once Eikichi got the hint and clambered off—smacked Yusuke’s face with his pillow, holding it over his face. “Whatever happened to not bein’ mushy, tough guy?”

Yusuke wrenched the pillow from his grip and lazily swung it at him, not bothering to get up. “Hey, you told me she doesn’t judge about that sorta thing, right? And I’m learnin’ there’s benefits to bein’ mushy, like kicking ass better.” He shifted to crack his back, then sighed, relaxing into the floor. “I’m just sticking to my way, and sometimes that means calling her Kuwabara’s Favorite Little Shitblaster or whatever.”

[misqnon]

15, 17, 18!

hello cora!!

15. How do you come up with titles for your fics/chapters?

oh god this is like asking how i come up with titles for my playlists (absolute nonsense)

for fic titles, i usually like something simple and descriptive but with a bit of cleverness in there too. some examples: for my sanji backstory fic, "royal blue" its a double entendre on sanji being royalty and also the fact that he wears a lot of navy blue suits/blue is a thematic color for him lmao. "chartreuse is a shade of green" comes from the (weirdly common) misconception that chartreuse is a dark maroon color when actually it's a lime greenish - worked for the fic bc red is the color of blood and zoro is uh. lime green.

for chapters i either go for short and vaguely descriptive of what happens but also mysterious sounding. and then sometimes i just do references or song titles (every chapter of "with him?" is a song title...embarassing) (<- totally going to make a playlist for it later)

17. What’s something you’ve learned about while doing research for a fic?

i wish i kept a list as it happened bc i know im forgetting some crazy ones. i've learned about the intricate ingredient details (and history!) behind beef bourguignon and various types of risotto. i've learned how much blood the human body can lose and still live. ive learned about pueblo architecture and victorian vs gothic vs. etc. the definition of equinox vs solstice. intricacies of the word soothsayer. probably more

18. What’s one of your favorite lines you’ve written in a fic?

OH MAN THIS ONE'S HARD. IDK IF I KEEP TRACK...i know there are some but hell if i remember what they are 😭 i do have one i wrote recently that i shared in this ask, i'll share just the line im talking about again:

Sanji sees red. “You just don’t wanna admit your self-esteem issues are just as glaring as mine, you ‘honorable’ prick.”

the line itself is not that impressive but i really like the energy i created with their argument and the way it points out something i think will boil over eventually in canon...

and also some other fun random easter eggs ive thrown in: like the final chapter of "parallel" being called "vertex" bc the opposite of parallel lines are perpendicular lines, with the vertex being where they meet (hence the meeting of the two worlds in that fic) and things like sayer island from my current fic being named after,,,soothsayers (as mentioned earlier) BC. FORTUNE TELLING

ok done rambling now 👍thank u for giving me the opportunity to talk about writing i love it so much lmao

[batmanego]

hello i was wondering if you had any favorite batman comics or ones you'd reccomend for someone who wants to read more batman or know any good reclists, ty hope you have a good one^_^

hiiiii hi! yes, absolutely!

my favorite batman comic of all time is batman: ego, which is collected here with some other darwyn cooke batman work!

i'd also highly recommend scott snyder's 2011 batman run and the companion batman and robin run -- though keep in mind that damian's death happens in a different run and batman and robin explores the aftermath of it.

i'm currently rereading no man's land, which is a really influential and important piece of gotham city lore in general that explores the aftermath of a series of events (catyclysm and contagion, but also knightfall!) that lead the US government to declare gotham city condemned and separate from the united states: nobody gets in, nobody gets out. (if you want to know what led here, bruce briefly mentions knightfall, contagion, and catyclysm. i'd say knightfall is pretty important, but these are really only "mandatory" if you want to know the exact circumstances that led to no man's land).

i don't keep up with too many modern comics, but batman: failsafe (which starts here and ends at issue 130) is pretty okay. i mostly liked the zurr-en-arrh backup stories. tynion's detcom run is also pretty good. i enjoyed some pieces of batman: urban legends, but it's an anthology series, so not everything is gonna be to your taste.

all of those have to some degree focused on bruce-as-batman, which makes sense, because he's batman most of the time, but two dick-as-batman recommendations i have are the 2009 morrison batman and robin run and batman: the black mirror, which is a horror comic with a lot of gore, if you're not into that.

dick-as-batman is directly on the heels of final crisis, where bruce, uh. Dies, but that's not really introductory material.

how about some villain stuff? scarecrow year one and face the face are two favorites, along with some previously mentioned stuff like knightfall, no man's land, black mirror, etc.

if you want to know more about the life and death of jason todd, a death in the family and under the red hood are the places to start. do not read red hood and the outlaws. everyone who likes it is lying to you. it isn't good. red hood: lost days fills in some gaps about jason's time post-resurrection. dailyjasontodd has compiled a wonderful list of jason reading that i highly recommend!

i also like batman black and white (and its two sequels, the one from 2013 and the one from 2020. they're all anthology series) and batman: gotham knights (NOT the video game. the comic book).

batgirl 2000! also really fucking good! i forgot it the first time i wrote this post! whoops!

i also really recommend the batman unburied podcast, batman the animated series, the batman beyond tv show, and batman forever (which is a really stupid, awful movie. i love it deeply.)

i hope this helped and gave you some ideas on where to start! batman comics are an intimidating thing to get into, but these are some things i'd consider introductory. happy reading!! <3

[sineala]

Love your fics! Wanted to know your opinion about AXE now that it's finished :>

Oh boy oh boy! Thank you for asking! I loved AXE so much. It was definitely the best story I've ever read about what would happen if your house acquired sentience and hated you and decided to destroy the world.

Seriously, though -- I really loved AXE Judgment Day. I have a half-finished post where I was attempting to summarize the complete event with all the tie-ins and I should probably… finish reading all the tie-ins and finish writing that. I have an AXE Steve/Tony WIP -- the kind of fic that is basically meta disguised as a story where they talk through how they feel about the whole thing -- that is 42,000 words and I am nowhere near done yet. I honestly think it's one of the best line-wide Marvel events in a long time, which is really impressive when you consider that for the most part it's an event about the X-Men and the Eternals and I have almost no fannish interest in the Eternals and I haven't been consistently reading any X books since X Of Swords started.

So why do I like this event so much if it's not even about characters I am currently following? Well, I'm here for Steve/Tony, and I think it's a really good event for Steve and Tony, both as individual characters and for their relationship with each other, and I think the end of the story leaves them each in a really interesting place emotionally, with enough hanging threads that make it interesting to me fannishly.

We've had a few events in the past several years where Steve and Tony were basically on opposite sides -- Infinity (when you consider the fact that Tony has already been secretly betraying Steve), Axis, Time Runs Out/Secret Wars, Civil War II (when you consider the fact that it wasn't actually Steve), Secret Empire. Sometimes these events have prominently featured Steve and/or Tony, but as a Steve/Tony fan most of these weren't satisfying to me on an OTP level because they're not really on good terms. Although, yes, Secret Empire did provide a hell of a lot to think about and also some really interesting material for AUs because it did give us an evil Steve who, uh, canonically loves Tony. You should see my WIP list. But Secret Empire wouldn't make my list of events where Steve and Tony are BFFs, if you get what I mean.

We've had events where they were on the same side but the event wasn't really about them -- War of the Realms, Empyre, King in Black, Devil's Reign. (As far as I can tell, Devil's Reign never actually had the real Tony in it, either, but I will admit to not reading all the tie-ins.) Heroes Reborn was also a thing but didn't ever have Tony even meet Steve, AFAIK. So, I mean, it's nice that they don't hate each other but also they are just a couple characters in a cast of thousands. I think Empyre comes the closest, and I really enjoyed Empyre, but I wouldn't call Steve & Tony the stars of the event.

So AXE is one of the first events in a long time -- maybe since AvX? -- where both Steve and Tony have been friends on the same team with neither of them secretly being evil and where they have had big roles to play in the event itself. Both Steve and Tony have a lot to do in the mainline and Tony has an entire issue about him. Also, though I think it has its flaws, AXE is definitely much kinder to Tony than a lot of the other comics featuring Tony have been in a while. It portrays Tony and Steve as friends and as heroes genuinely trying to do good. And if you're like "isn't that what most superhero comics are like?" then you haven't been reading a lot of Iron Man comics in the past several years, although that is maybe, maybe starting to change.

I also think the setup of AXE is the kind of thing that lends itself to interesting fannish theorizing without being unkind to most of the heroes. I suppose technically it starts out as a hero vs. hero event, depending on who you consider heroes. A faction of Eternals decides that mutants are deviants and decides to wipe them out. The Avengers decide this is a bad idea and they and the remaining Eternals join in on the side of the mutants. Since Eternals have to do what Celestials tell them, the good guys (starring Tony) come up with a plan to reanimate Avengers Mountain (a dead Celestial) and it will become a god to the Eternals again and it'll tell them to knock it off with the mutant-killing. This works. Sort of. Then the Celestial decides it's going to judge the rest of humanity on an individual and a collective basis and everyone has to band together to try to stop it. Steve ends up basically leading humanity in battle and Tony ends up taking point on the strike team trying to bring the Celestial down from the inside. Literally the inside.

So, yes, as a Steve/Tony fan, I enjoy the fact that they're working together. They're friends! They're clearly coming up with plans together and they're concerned about each other and Steve doesn't even blame Tony for being the guy who arguably headed the project that started the mess in the first place.

Also Steve makes some great rallying speeches.

(Don't worry, Steve's fine.)

And Tony also makes some great speeches, honestly, just on a smaller scale.

I feel like the AA references in there are very in-character for Tony.

It's been my experience that fandom tends to really enjoy events that let them sort characters based on their beliefs and powers -- who would win in a fight? Who would support Registration? And this gets you that, and they don't even have to fight each other. Because what a lot of the tie-ins are about is "who passes, who fails, and why?" and so, without even pitting your faves against each other, you get to do the same kind of theorizing. And because Steve and Tony are major characters, we get to see both of their judgments, and we get a lot about Tony's.

And it's really cool, I think, because it absolutely does not go the way you think it would go. It does not go the way they think it will go. Because Steve is one of the very first to fail -- and Tony is at his side, wondering who possibly has a chance to pass if Steve fails. So Steve basically spends the whole rest of the event clearly feeling like a massive failure and trying to pull himself together for the rest of humanity. I have feelings about this.

And Tony, in a move that surprises everyone including himself, passes. There is a whole issue devoted to this and I really like it except for a couple of points I will detail below and also the fact that it requires us to acknowledge that Cantwell's run happened, which is a thing I was really trying to not do. Anyway, it has a great callback to The Confession.

Tony just doesn't want to let Steve down.

The whole thing is interesting. It gives you a lot to think about. They're clearly still both unsettled about this by the end of the event, and then Tony asks Steve to go hot-tubbing with him, which. You know. There's potential there. I and my massive WIP clearly think there's potential there.

So that's a lot of fun. At least, I think so.

This event has a downside for me, which is that it has a Did Not Do The Research problem. I think this is most apparent in AXE Avengers, the issue all about Tony, which includes such odd developments as "Tony agrees with the assertion that he likes to date people who are parental figures with strong moral compasses" (I have literally no idea where this is coming from, as I would have said that he likes to date people to try to kill him) and "the Celestial, in the form of Howard, tells Tony that they wanted him so badly but then he wasn't a great father to Tony." I feel like "we wanted you so badly" is an interesting way of describing "we adopted you solely because we needed a decoy son to save the life of our biological son." If this had been by any other writer, I would have said, oh, well, I guess they just didn't read the adoption arc. This is by Kieron Gillen. You know, the guy who wrote the adoption arc.

There are a couple of other places in the event itself where the plot doesn't match up to itself across comics, which you would probably expect in tie-ins except… these were all also by Kieron Gillen. So after Steve dies and is reborn from an egg, naked, in the Avengers Mansion kitchen (don't worry about it), he either has enough time to get dressed and talk to Tony before the strike team heads out (if you believe Death To The Mutants) or Tony is already on-mission when Steve hatches (if you believe the mainline). These are, again, both by the same writer.

Anyway, if you believe the version where Steve gets to wish Tony well, it's very sweet:

There is also one further instance where Not Doing The Research isn't a problem, per se, but there was one canonical reference that AXE Avengers could have made, that the entire issue was leading me to think that it was going to make, and then it got there and it didn't, presumably because Gillen didn't know it, and I was so confused because it would have made the issue so much stronger.

So the culmination of AXE Avengers features the Celestial reenacting Tony's parents' car accident, which the Celestial is using as an analogy for the disaster the world is currently going through, and asks Tony what Tony will do. Tony immediately heads to the car and starts trying to repair it and explains that it may not make a difference, but he has to try, and if he works hard enough, no one has to die in a car crash.

It's a nice moment. It's very Tony. It's very touching. It seems like a philosophy he would espouse. It is also an established canon fact that is thirty years old.

In Iron Man #288, we learn that the first thing Tony did after his parents' death was find out what the cause of the crash was (a flaw in the brake design). Then he spent forty hours redesigning the brakes in that car model, bought the car company, and implemented his new, improved brake design. So no one else was ever going to die in a crash like that.

So that thing he says in AXE Avengers that he would do, hypothetically, about fixing the car so no one else would die? He did it. It wasn't hypothetical. He actually 100% did that exact thing, in canon, when faced with this exact situation. So you can kind of see why I was expecting the AXE Avengers issue to refer to this, because I figured this was him describing the thing that he did. It would have been the perfect thing for him to mention. I just assumed that was what was going on here and we were leading up to that.

The issue does not refer to this fact, at all.

I don't know, I just thought it was a bizarre omission. I guess no one involved with this issue knew enough to mention it.

Also I feel like if I were the Avengers I personally would not want to move right back into living in the dead Celestial corpse as soon as it died and the fighting was over. They cannot be hurting that badly for real estate. I'm just saying.

But overall? Yeah, great event. I loved AXE Judgment Day. Give me ten more just like it.

[kleinstar]

CHARACTER SHEET repost, don’t reblog !

basics ! FULL NAME. Eiden (Itadori) TITLE. Grand Sorceror('s descendant, supposedly) NICKNAME. Darling, Fraudulent Sorceror, little devil... there's more out there GENDER. cismale PRONOUNS. he/him. HEIGHT. 176 cm (its his birthday too hehe AGE. 23 ZODIAC. Gemini (hmm) SPOKEN LANGUAGES. -

physical characteristics ! HAIR COLOR. brown, originally darker, dyes them slightly ligther EYE COLOR. milk tea SKIN TONE. light BODY TYPE. fit VOICE. Irakusa Netoru - my laptop is really laggy right know but ill add s DOMINANT HAND. right. POSTURE. sliiiiight slouch SCARS. none canon TATTOOS. nope BIRTHMARKS. nope MOST NOTICEABLE FEATURE(S). uhhhhhh

childhood ! PLACE OF BIRTH. unknown HOMETOWN. also unknown SIBLINGS. Yuuji (Isola), Rin (not accepted) PARENTS. who knows

adult life ! OCCUPATION. sextoy designer CURRENT RESIDENCE. Itadori Residence, Sunset Circuit CLOSE FRIENDS. list long now RELATIONSHIP STATUS. single FINANCIAL STATUS. pretty good! DRIVER’S LICENSE. he's got motorcycle license CRIMINAL RECORD. some youthful misdirections here and there but none really VICES. gay sex (love it when i dont have to edit lmaoo), alcohol, nosiness

sex & romance ! SEXUAL ORIENTATION. gay. LOVE LANGUAGE. all of them RELATIONSHIP TENDENCIES. reflective on who he's with Eiden molds along to his partner's comforts, usually teases a lot

miscellaneous ! CHARACTER’S THEME SONG. uh HOBBIES TO PASS TIME. sketching, drawing, watching and reading stuff, trying out stuff, sextoy designing PHOBIAS. lowkey abandonment issues, fear of being shunned and fear of losing his self worth SELF CONFIDENCE LEVEL. he'll hype himself up to an obnoxious point but definitely great, he'll even have sex with himself (did so in canon! he doesnt remember it tho rip) - but it has its lows he's still got hard time admitting any fragility VULNERABILITIES. uh already mentioned on that self-confidence level, not that strong either

[saspitite]

CARRD | PRONOUNS | KO-FI

plain text/screenreader friendly version will be made soon i promise

hi, i'm saspitite, but you can call me sas, saph, or cadaver!! genderqueer shrimp has breached the internet!!! i use any pronouns but she/her :) oh and i am most definitely on your dni list, btw. will sometimes blog in finnish or german.

i have been dubbed as the "shrimp blog" and "hevisaurus blog" several times on separate occasions and i take great pride in that

current icon: #062 from Drowned Shrimp

current header: a post-concert photo of Heavysaurus

sideblogs

@saspitidy - art blog

@is-the-shrimp-video-cute - blog giving context to videos/general media involving shrimp and some other crustaceans

@hotelmabiya - in-character flight rising clan lore blog (hiatus)

@ebiquest - game project blog (hiatus)

all about me

➸ this mess is a place just so you know. i will be reblogging All sorts of shit. i try my best to tag so you can filter for your own curated experience but i am not perfect 👍

this is not completely a politically-based blog but i might occasionally reblog that kinda stuff. hide #shrimpolitics if you don't wanna see it.

i also love to post about gay things and the Good Ol Leftist Agenda so there's that. i don't really have a tag for it yet (and probably never will) so, uh, suffer. serious/heavy issues are tagged as #serious stuff... if i can remember to use that one

and i also love posting about shrimp/crustaceans!! my general posting tag is #shrimposting and my general reblogging tag is #shimpy shemps (note that these aren't EXCLUSIVELY just for shrimp, but for other crustaceans too sometimes). if you see a shrimp in a post and wanna know what species it is (or if there's just general context in relation to shrimp missing) you can tag my sideblog @is-the-shrimp-video-cute and i'll most likely be able to answer because i'm just that normal about them lol

(more tag info found towards the bottom)

➸ messages and asks are always open, please just don’t spam me, it makes me nervous!!

➸ MESSAGES ARE OPEN TO THE PUBLIC AGAIN! i thought my old system was a bit tiring so i just opened them back up.

➸ pretty please pleaseeee send me asks in general i love answering them!! (/nf)

➸ i do my best to add image descriptions for any images/gifs i add in my posts, but i may occasionally forget to/don't know how to describe them. do let me know if i should add/fix an id for anything in any of my posts!!

➸ mutuals are free to ask about any possible phobias/triggers i need tagged if they'd like, i just removed that information publicly for safety reasons.

➸ btw i love all trans people and aros and aces and mspec lesbians and bi lesbians and afab transfems/amab transmascs and multigender people and queer poc and disabled queers and fat queers and neurodivergent queers! i do not care what people say about you i love you forever!!!!!!!

➸ also i say faggot and dyke and tranny a lot. so uhm idk block me if you're a coward

➸ DNI if you: have a human body, breathe oxygen and exhale carbon dioxide, eat food to survive, physically exist, have cooties (AHHHHH!!!!), or have joy and whimsy in your heart!!!!!!! (^ if its not obvious, this is satire. ^)

tags

(reblogs)

"#giggle" - posts i think are especially funny

"#gold star sticker" - my all time faves

"#shimpy shemps" - posts about shrimp/crustaceans not made by me

"#shrimpolitics" - political bullshit

"#serious stuff" - posts touching on serious or heavy topics, may sometimes contain triggering subjects

"#identifying shrimp / identifying crustaceans" - me adding the species of a shrimp/crustacean found in a post (if its not already outright stated) !!

"#out of all the posts out there this is certainly one of them" - posts that took me like 300 rereads to mildly comprehend and i still don't fully get what's happening. yet i reblog

"#(____) wunk" - i have no clue how but this became my tag for rabbits.

(posts)

"#sas says" - just a normal post i'll make, maybe a random life update or a funny joke i wanted to share

"#sas scavenging" - me showing off something i recently found/bought, which could be anything from t-shirts to rocks

"#shrimposting" - me blabbing about various crustaceans, typically fun facts and whatnot

"#shrimping" - any of my irl activities and whatnot that involves me wearing my shrimp costumes (like conventions and events!!)

"#the shrimployee" - work rants

"#venusposting" - posts of my cat venus

"#sas spiels" - writing/creative concepts that might not be fully fleshed out, just me sharing some thoughts i had in my head

"#sas stories" - my writing!!

"#sas scribbles" - my art!!

"#sas songs" - my music!!

"#a terrible thing has happened" - a terrible thing has happened

"#cosmic intertwines" - my eldritch horror universe (note that this is an umbrella name for all of my fictional worlds listed below and may be tagged in posts that focus on other worlds, but is usually reserved for the gods and outer activity of my fictional universe)

“#machina mundi” - an advanced post-apocalyptic robot world

"#hotel mabiya" - my flight rising clan

"#belet's dream" - a world of diverse anthropomorphic animals

"#the intergalactic voyagers" - the saga of a group of friends and their exploration of the cosmos! (takes place in the same world as "belet's dream")

[idril-la-wiccan]

Quick Status Update Post !

Alright ! So I have quite a few things I will work on during April in preperation for what's to come in May, so I'll tell you where I am currently with my works and what I hope to achieve.

OMORI - Out of the Abyss

Part 8 of Act 1 is 100% complete in terms of writing. All I have left to do are the illustrations.

As of writing this, I have made 4 simple illustrations out of 6, 4 comic pages out of -possibly- 13 or 14 and 0 animated video out of 1.

There is a lot to do still, but I have surprised myself by managing to make 99% of the currently finished illustrations in 1 day. The video will undoubtedly take more time, but if I keep the pace for the rest, it shouldn't be too much of an issue.

Part 8 will be posted here in 3 segments. I hope to manage to post it in its entirety before the end of April. Because next month, I will be busy with :

Mermay

That's right. Which also means I'll start preparing for it during this month.

As of writing this, the official prompts for Mermay 2023 have not been comunicated yet, which, I must say, makes me nervous. So nervous in fact I have made my own prompt list based on the ones from previous years.

Now, you might tell me "If Mermay is so important for you, you probably should just put Out of the Abyss on hiatus for now, don't you think ?"

Nuh-uh. No can do. Here's why :

It is very likely that I will spoil some of my plans for the following Acts of Out of the Abyss during Mermay.

Not that Mermay will be OMORI centric, on the contrary, you can expect some Cookie Run and maybe other stuff to come.

But due to the circumstances, I believe I should finish part 8 as soon as I can because, while NOT the last part of Act 1, it will still give some sense of closure.

But, if I fail to finish Part 8 before May comes, at least I'd have tried.

TL;DR

I'll try to finish and post Act 1 Part 8 of Out of the Abyss before Mermay comes.

Whether I succed to post it in time or not, expect some entries of Mermay to spoil things for the following Acts of Out of the Abyss. Maybe some of Act 2 out right, but most likely things from Act 4 and beyond.

Cordially, Idril.

[angeltism]

YEAH BEING ON ANON FOR A WHILE WILL BE FUN and i did stay up like a lot last night but don't worry about it im actually super used to doing that LMAO alright ALRIGHT TIME FOR THE QUESTIONS oh lord you cant add a read more in asks. uh. sorry to all aqua followers HSJSHSJHS

1- i think we share like a Lot of fandoms actually! basing this off of your extended media you know rentry btw. UHM im a huge huge fan of prsk, honkai star rail, tbhk, bsd, milgram, vocaloid, undertale/deltarune and i think that's it? i wont go into much detail about other fandoms im in because one specific interest of mine could give away the whole answer to my mystery to some of our shared mutuals JSHSHSHDH but aside from that one im also into enstars bandori and some other rhythm games! not really sure what else to add to that list honestly i forgot everything i have ever liked in my life, i also have many irls from those medias :3

2- honestly? i have been having the biggest labels crisis of my life these past few weeks so pronouns aren't something i really have the ability to specify rn, just use whatever you feel like at the moment and i will be more than happy! curious to see what your perception of my gender ends up being so i can get closer to an answer to my, uhm, current dilemma! HSJSHSHJSJSJ

3- OH UH ITS ALL VOCALOID I THINK i can't really say i have specific artists i like outside of that... maybe will wood and that's, really it. aside from just those two its all specific songs from different artists yeah. BUT IT'S DIFFERENT WITH VOCALOID BECAUSE I CAN KINDA DISCERN WHICH PRODUCERS I LISTEN TO MORE! also some utaites i listen to like a looot, one example is Ado! onto vocaloid producers my favorites ever are Syudou (producer of Usseewa!) and Van De Shop (producer of Pheles!), aside from those two i listen to like a lot more just not with that much frequency (its mostly just one specific song or songs i like from those producers. yeah)

4- i have like a gazillion but lately i have grown very attached to periwinkle blue!

5- FOR LIKE A MONTH OR SO? I HONESTLY DONT REMEMBER JSSHSJSSHJSH as for the reasons... in many ways i realized we are like extremely similar (mostly with the yearning and the love and all that yknow) and that just made me start feeling more and more attracted to you because hey! she gets almost all of the things i experience! and well here we are now

6- i can confidently say fried chicken is my favorite food in this whole wide world, as for sweet stuff im kinda. basic. yeah its chocolate HSJSHSJSHDH

- 💌 anon (honestly sometimes i get scared i might end up not pressing the anon button and then ruin the whole surprise. eek!)

LMAOOOO it's ok the mewtuals will forgive uu . they have to or else /silly j

although WOWW OMG YEAH WE DO SEEM KINDA SIMILAR ?? W taste in media and music and colors (<- loves blue . is it obvious ehe) and wowow for like a month . . . wowowowow . . . . that's honestly impressive n kinda endearing wow <3

also i'll purrobably be defaulting to they/them i suppose since idk . for me . i can't rlly assume genders esp for beings i know online ? like my brain soorta can sometimes but other times just . nope . n i can't rlly think if uu give me more masc or fem or just neu vibes . . . like loveletter anon is loveletter anon . to me . y'know . but i hope uu figure out uur identity soon , lol , i know questioning can be kinda eeeh to go through (<- started calling myself genderqueer/multigenderqueer to avoid trying to find out any specifics bc i'm just Me and i'm just Queer Of Gender and other than that idfk lol)

also fried chicken is so good . . . i can't rlly handle bone-in stuff bc of my sensory issues (icky gross for my brain) but flavor-wise it's soo good omg . i just have to like , cut/rip it off of the bone before i eat it . and chocolate is a simple but rlly good pick honestly . it's like 90% of the sweets i eat bc ice cream takes freezer space , baked goods need to actually be made , etc etc . . . ooo wait i'm curious do uu like dark , milk or white better . purrsonally i like dark n milk :3

[shititbe]

Anyway, Peter Parker is Bi, and I Won’t Be Convinced Otherwise.

Firstly, we have to get our bases covered. What exactly is Bi-sexuality? What is sexuality? 

Sexuality is defined as a persons identity in relation to gender(s) they are attracted to. Why is this important? Peter’s sexuality has never been specifically stated in the comics, nor in any other form of media. It’s assumed that he is straight because of his popular relationship with Mary Jane Watson in the comics, and the movies. 

Now that we have a bases for what exactly sexuality is and how it’s defined, let’s go over Peter’s partners. 

Obviously Peter and Mary Jane are a piece of comic book history. They eventually get married, though sadly, during the events of Civil War II (I think, don’t quote me) Peter and Mary Jane sell their marriage to Mephisto in order to save Aunt May

They later had their memories of their marriage restored, they have yet to get back together and it’s been a few issues if I remember correctly. Next we have Peter’s first, and most unfortunate love, Gwen Stacy. 

They dated in high school where she later died. Of course, Peter has dated other people (namely, Black Cat, Betty Brant, Carol Danvers, Anna Maria, Cindy Moon, Lian Tang, and so on). Since we have his known history of heterosexuality out there, we need to move onto another important part of Peter’s Bi-sexuality. An important implication in any media, especially queer media though, and that is the homoerotic subtext. 

Homoerotic subtext is important part of queer culture, a lot of the time it’s used to portray a characters queerness without saying it out (see: Dorian Gray by Oscar Wild or Great Gatsby By Fitz). In current decade, homoerotic subtext is often used for queer baiting or creating more realistic male friendships. 

So what’s the difference between someone creating a health male friendship (or a character comfortable in their heterosexuality) and implying a character is queer? 

Here are some examples of a healthy male character, both with himself and his friendships.  

Clearly he’s just taking the shit, and messing around with Reed. He’s comfortable enough (or as I like to see it, so traumatized because good god this guy has been Spider-Man since he was 15 good god that’s awful. He probably doesn’t care anymore). Here are some examples of Peter a little more than just a straight man shooting the shit. 

This has three meanings. Two of which I will take, one of which is just deeply embarrassing. Despite Peter’s history with humiliating events, I don’t think he would get his own spunk in his eyes. Leaving the other two options, he has experience getting spunk of - some kind - in his eyes, and/or he’s taking the shit again. Which is very likely. 

Kissing a cop? For....no reason? A little not so hetero of you Peter. 

You can practically hear his disappointment in his voice. Also could be read as taking the shit, but why would you. 

Making out with The Thing? Gay. 

This one is the most important. Peter is clearly tired, annoyed by his teammates (see wolverine being wolverine in the corner). Shits on fire, its mid battle, and Peter has the audacity to mutter “I hate men” to himself. The only people I have every heard say this in that was are lgbt and straight women, and lgbt men. This kind of expression only comes from people who date, or deal with men in a completely different world than straight men. Straight men use this phrase as an endearment, “Oh have you seen Bill today, I hate that guy.” “Man Jerry can do so many push-ups, I hate that guy.” Very different language, and implications (I also, obviously don’t know how straight men speak). 

 Now that we’ve gone over our bases, and homoerotic subtext. How else could we gather that Peter Parker is Bi? There are many tropes in media - queer media - that allure to a characters queerness. Like homoerotic subtext, there are ways to tell an audience something without specifically saying it. 

This is a gay wedding Peter went to in the recent comics. I don’t know if any of you have been to a gay wedding recently, but Peters face (the first panel above the wedding) is the same exact face I made at my first gay wedding. It’s the face of excitement for not only the couple, but for yourself. The hope that maybe, you too can actually be in a same-sex relationship. 

I’m also going to allure to queer tropes as stated previously. Such as the real, and fictional trope of lgbt people sticking together. Thousands of years of belittlement and oppression will make groups of people not want to wonder out, and subconsciously look for others like them. 

Johnny Storm (and Wade Wilson since he comes in later but I couldn’t find a picture of the confirmation) is cannon Bi-sexual (Pan-sexual). 

Their friendship is deeply homoerotic as most queer friendships in media and real life are. Johnny flirts with Peter on many occasions (saying his ideal women is a female version of Peter, inviting him over to watch is sex tape, and so on) and of course oh my god they were roommates. 

Some other popular queer tropes are: Found Family, Soulmates, and Enemies to lovers. Because it’s superhero related, this includes the Identity Porn tag as well.  

Peter Parker and Wade Wilson have a famous Love/Hate relationship. I mean, how could you expect anything less when your first meeting with this known mercenary is him throwing your civilian persona out the window of a car. Now, Wade still doesn’t know Peter is Spider-Man in the current run of comics, but that doesn’t make anything about them any less gay. 

For the Found Family Trope: 

Because it’s Peter and Wade, their whole development can be read as Enemies to Friends to Lovers, so I wont bother backing that up because, uh, it speaks for itself. One panel really does to add that cause though 

I’m not going to explain what a free-pass list is.

The Soulmates part I know I have to back up. 

For SoulMates:  

Now this panel requires a little explanation. Wade kills Peter, not knowing he’s Spider-Man. Weasel takes over for Peter (they don’t know its him) so no one suspects he’s dead. Deadpool begins to feel guilty he killed his best buds best bud, so he tries to bring Peter back to life. Losing his stunning good looks (switching back to how he looked before Weapon X making his wife Shiklah estranged (then she married Dracula but thats beside the point)). Spider-Man is Peter’s “true self” or patronus for Harry Potter fans. Wade is stupid and hasn’t connected the dots yet, effectively making him the biggest simp in history. Seriously, who destroys their marriage for the c h a n c e for getting some with their idol? A Simp, that’s who.

Peter forgives Wade for killing him (and for saving him from killing their genetic daughter itsy-bitsy). If someone killed me they better be hot as fuck before I even thing about forgiving them. Ignoring Peter’s super sexy forgiving nature, uh, he’s kinda simping. 

Died in each others arms. Nothing else is needed. 

They’re heartmates. From what I read, the feeling has to be mutual in order for it to work. The witches (long story, comics are hard to explain) that captured deadpool were expecting his wife so they could get the headmistress back. Instead, they got Peter. Basically Heartmates = soulmates but chosen for you instead of chosen by you. 

To conclude my point: 

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. 

[27dragons]

What’s Been Going on with Dragons

Longtime followers may have noticed I’ve been a lot less active over the last year, and even less active than that in the last 4-6 months. You may even have wondered WTF, dragons?

Well… This TF:

Obviously, the pandemic heaped stress on literally everyone; that’s probably got to go first on the list, because it compounded and multiplied the effect of every single other thing on the list.

Tisfan’s stroke (Sept ’20) deprived me of my writing partner and most avid reader, which was a hell of a blow.

I got a promotion at work (Apr ’21) that involved quite a bit more responsibility and stress, and then it took eight months to backfill my previous position, which meant I was doing two full-time jobs.

Thing1 started college (Aug ’21) and more or less immediately hated it, which is obviously worse for them than me, but is still pretty stressful as a parent who wants to make sure their kids get everything they need to be successful and happy adults.

Thing1 then landed in the hospital for a few days (Sept ’21); I spent the whole thing living in the hospital visitor’s chair.

I was more or less guilted into accepting a “temporary” promotion at work (Nov ’21) to be the project manager for my entire project — a project which is foundering due to factors I won’t discuss in a public forum but which are entirely outside of my control. This promotion did NOT come with a pay increase, because of its temporary nature. The only saving grace was that they finally backfilled my original position, but that meant I had to start training the new person. For those counting along at home, that’s two high-responsibility, full-time positions, plus training a third.

Tisfan’s death (Dec ’21) rocked me HARD, and I spent most of the next month laser focused on doing everything I could to help and support her family while trying to deal with my own grief.

The government office for which I’m a contractor put our contract up for bid (Dec ’21). The new contract was so bad that my company decided not to bid on it. Despite putting out the bid, the government hadn’t actually made a decision about whether to go with this new contract or renew our current contract.

An assortment of minor-but-annoying medical issues cropped up (Jan-Feb ’22). One of those (just as an indicator of my stress levels) is a stomach ulcer.

One of my two database admins, due to the uncertainty of our contract, left the company (Feb ’22), leaving me with only one DBA. This is, as you might imagine, not ideal.

My mom, while on vacation in Mexico with my dad, wound up in the hospital, in ICU (mid-March). Not only was the family extremely worried about her, we also had some additional moderate worry about my dad and various logistics (like the hospital demanding payment up front for over $50,000, and my dad’s hotel reservation running out, and trying to figure out how to get my mom back to the U.S. once she was stable enough to move.)

My remaining DBA left (mid-March) for a trip out of the country for 3 weeks, which means they have only limited access to our databases.

The government decided (mid-March) to go with the new contract and not renew our current contract; everyone currently on the contract (including me) now has to decide whether to leave our company and go to work for the company who won the new contract (which, if you recall, was so bad our company didn’t want it), or be laid off and look for new jobs.

Just as she was stabilizing, my mom suffered a heart attack and died (late March). I’ve spent most of the last 10 days or so coping with that grief and all the logistics of getting my dad and her remains back into the U.S. and then getting started on all the paperwork. Death involves a lot of paperwork. When that death happens in another country, the amount of paperwork is even more ridiculous.

So, uh, yeah. My stress levels are through the roof right now, and every time I try to write something, I look at the doc, read the last few paragraphs, and then close it again. I just can’t.

That said, my work situation is at least going to be resolving in a couple of weeks. I am not staying on with the slowly-dying project, but my company has promised to shift me into one of their other, more successful projects, so I won’t be unemployed. Two more weeks, and then I will hopefully be able to draw a deep breath again.

And I miss writing. So I’ve applied to  the Winteriron ‘zine. It’s time to get back on the horse. Wish me luck! Story ideas welcome! 😅

[figofswords]

Hi!! Okay for comic recs, if that's okay - I'm not a big comic nerd because I don't like the gritty style as much (not saying that all are, that's just what I've been exposed to). I do love graphic novels.

But I've watched Young Justice and read the Batfam webtoon and am now a massive Dick Grayson fan. Do you have any recommendations for DG content? Thank you!!

ok sorry i saw this when i was busy and then forgot about it but YES i do have recs!

the lost carnival (michael moreci) - you said you like graphic novels so this is my first rec! it's a dick grayson stand-alone graphic novel about dick going back to visit haly's circus and sort of discovering this history of magic and romance and tragedy. i love this graphic novel. it's maybe not the most CANON canon thing but the art is GORGEOUS and it's a really sweet story.

robin: year one (chuck dixon) - this is among my favorite comics. it's a four book series featuring dick right after becoming robin, following the origin continuity established for him in batman: dark victory. it's very cute, it's sort of a coming of age story, and i adore its portrayal of dick and bruce's dynamic. (in general, chuck dixon is a good writer to look out for with robin comics—he has a really good run on tim's robin in the 90s. he is unfortunately annoyingly conservative but his writing itself is really good and he keeps his politics out of his comics, so. death of the author, yadda yadda, it's hard to avoid in comics but again his writing is really quite good)

batman chronicles: the gauntlet - this is a single-issue story, again from dick's early days as robin. the premise is basically he's got this final test before bruce will let him go out as robin officially: make it a whole night in gotham city without bruce finding him. but then! stuff happens! bruce needs to get to him to help him but uh oh! dick still thinks they're doing hide and seek! anyway yeah this comic is really well done and i like it a lot.

batman: year three (batman #436-439) - dick (now nightwing, post jason's death, JUST before tim) comes home for the first time in a while just in time for tony zucco's parole hearing and ends up revisiting the circumstances of his parents' murders. disclaimer that while this has been on my list for a while i haven't gotten around to reading it yet, but it's sort of the first real deep dive into dick's origin story and it's written by marv wolfman who i 100% trust. (anything by marv wolfman is also good to check out - he's responsible for aging dick into nightwing and giving him his own identity outside of being batman's partner during the new teen titans, which i haven't read much of but which is supposed to be very very good)

some other stuff i haven't read yet but have heard very good things about:

-nightwing (1996). chuck dixon's run. i don't like the art style which is why i keep failing to read this but the story is well regarded.

-the new teen titans. again, i trust marv wolfman. i did start reading and loved what i was seeing but haven't gotten very far. this is an ensemble cast and not just dick but you said you started with yj so you should be fine.

-batman: gates of gotham. batman!dick and the rest of the kids dealing with a resurfaced old old gotham mystery. the only reason i didn't finish this is i got distraced bc im trying to read like ten different things at once

-the current run of nightwing written by tom taylor is also supposed to be pretty good. i definitely love the art style but i've been putting off reading until more of it got uploaded to dc universe infinite. if i try and get caught up now i'm going to want to read them as they come out by going to the comics store and buying individual issues and that is bad for my wallet. ANYWAYS. it looks good so maybe worth checking out.

and that's my list for you! this is probably way wordier than you were looking for but who am i if i don't type up paragraphs and paragraphs when asked about my opinions. hopefully this is helpful and have fun reading!

[existslikepristin]

Impromptu Review

Thanks for editing this one goes to momirene and Worldsover, and for helpful beta reading feedback from them and one dork who wants to remain anonymous.

Tags: TheLounge, Red Velvet, SNSD (Girl's Generation), Joy, Sunny, loneliness, potential traumatization of cats, a hoard of hell-themed sex toys, a strap on, a butt plug with Jiu's face in it, and bisexual problems.

The front door of Sunny’s apartment swung open so fast that Joy felt a breeze from the vacuum it left behind.

“Joy! You’re here!”

Joy blinked. “Yeah, I said I would come over.”

“It’s been so long since we’ve met up! Come in, come in!”

“It’s only been like a month though.”

Sunny grabbed Joy’s hands and pulled her through the doorway. “It feels like so much longer than that!”

Joy smiled and took her shoes off in the entryway. “You seem more excited than usual.”

“What? How so?”

“Well for one,” Joy said, pointing at the kitchen, “It looks like you prepared for a whole party in here.”

The kitchen’s island was covered in plates of snacks and several variations of alcoholic beverages. Additionally, Sunny was noticeably sweaty, like she had just run around the house preparing for guests. Joy figured it would be best not to bring that up.

“What? No. That? That’s… yeah, that’s a lot of food, isn’t it?” Sunny’s posture drooped, as if she’d already expended all of her energy on her greeting.

Joy pulled her into a side hug. Her height served to straighten Sunny back up. “What’s going on, girl?”

Sunny sighed and leaned her head on Joy’s chest. “I dunno. I’m just excited. Haven’t had a good social night any time recently.”

“Aw! But what about these cutie kitties?”

Sogeum popped her head out from behind the wall and gave Joy her signature droopy, grim stare without so much as a meow. As soon as Joy shuffled in her direction though, she turned and went back into the living room.

“Well, you know. Can’t really have a real conversation with the cats.”

Joy hummed her agreement and stepped into the kitchen. “I’m always happy to talk to you Sunny. They don’t call SM a family for nothing.”

Sunny groaned, loudly.

“Um. Okay,” Joy said when Sunny didn’t elaborate. “Not a family? Just a bunch of really close friends?”

“Yeah, that’ll work better. Not a fan of the family motif.”

Joy picked up a cracker and chomped down. “Gonna… explain? Family is normally a positive thing, isn’t it?”

Sunny grabbed a bottle of wine and yanked the cork out. “Yeah, totally, for sure. Hey, do you like Chardonnay?”

“I…” Joy didn’t want to skirt around whatever issue Sunny was having, but was well-aware of her stubbornness. “I sure do.”

As fancy glasses of white wine were generously poured, Joy made note of Sunny’s slow, unsteady movements. She worried that perhaps Sunny had already started drinking, or wasn’t getting enough sleep.

* * *

“Can you believe that, Joy?”

“No way. It’s just inhuman.”

“Completely! It’s not like green onions are suddenly more expensive to dry out!”

The conversation had started with gossip and cheese snacking when the sun was high. As the sun set, the discussion shifted to the price of instant meals, and the snack plates were all but empty. Joy had to fight the constant urge to fall asleep, as the topics were never much more interesting than that. But she let Sunny lead the talking as much as possible.

Joy was simply relieved that Sunny called her over before diving into her liquor storage. “You should start a petition to regulate the price. I’d be the first to sign it.”

Sunny’s tipsy grin matched Joy’s. Though the alcohol consumption had been slow-going, they had been doing it for several hours. “Oh that would be great press. ‘Washed up idol upset with ramen manufacturers.’”

With an exaggerated roll of the eyes, Joy pointed at a set of boxes in the corner of the living room, currently being used as a lookout tower by Sogeum. “You’re not washed up yet. Look at all of those sponsor gifts. Those weren’t here last time I came over… Wait, they weren’t, were they?”

Sunny giggled. “No, they’re, uh… new.”

Their corporate sponsors weren’t something that Joy, Sunny, or any of the other SM idols discussed often. There were usually so many vying for their attention that it was pointless trying to keep track. But Joy reasoned, somewhat drunkenly, that talking about it might be therapeutic to someone so down on their social status. “Who are they from, anyway?”

A blush deepened the red of Sunny’s already tipsy-glowing cheeks. “Uh… Nobody. Just a regular sponsor, ya know?”

Joy grinned. “Oh, come on. You can tell me. What am I gonna do? Call a press conference to tell the tabloids who’s contributing to your paycheck?”

Sunny rolled her eyes. She shot off the couch, spilling a drop or two of her wine in the process. From Joy’s naturally higher perspective, Sunny didn’t seem that much taller. “Fine,” she said, wobbling, “but you better not make fun of me.”

“I’ll make fun of you for other reasons, like how much I love you, bitch!” Joy blinked at her own shouting. She didn’t know when the alcohol had hit her, but she was beginning to think that she was a little more intoxicated than she previously thought.

Thankfully, the joviality in her voice seemed to encourage Sunny to play along. She set her wine on the coffee table and picked one of the smaller boxes off of the pile. “Disclosure first! We haven’t agreed to any deals yet. They sent me this stuff to try to convince me to shill it. I didn’t reach out to them.”

Joy waved the disclosure off like a mosquito, but Sunny still tossed the box in her direction. The weight inside of it was awkwardly distributed. Joy attempted to catch it, but it wound up ricocheting off the tips of her fingers and nearly knocking over an open, mostly full bottle of soju.

“The fuck is in this thing?”

“I’ve got some ideas but I just know who it’s from. Open it and find out.”

Joy tore into the box with no regard for the care that went into the packaging, which itself was surprisingly discreet. A smirk cracked her lips when she thought about what sorts of deliveries required such discretion. But the smirk faded right away when she got a view of the inside and realized that the packager apparently had the same idea.

Inside was a pair of plastic sheets wrapped asymmetrically around a roughly water bottle sized blob of blood red silicone. A small bit of pink cardboard advertised it as a five-speed, rotation-simulating, self-cleaning, pattern-switching, USB-charging, automatically-lubricating, remote-controlled vibrator with a speaker at the bottom for replicating a set of desired moans and a specialized charging dock.

Joy cleared her throat and stared at the horrifically fancy dildo, and its label, “Dante’s Dive,” unsure if she should toss it back to Sunny, considering it was clearly a personal item.

Sunny reached into what was left of the box, procuring a pretty little decorated card. “Dear Ms. Lee, we at Second Ring Inc were very pleased to hear your impromptu review of our products on a recent episode of ‘Welp, I Guess We’re Talking About This Now’ and wished to send you some additional items to show our appreciation. These are in no way a request for further public review,” Sunny was briefly interrupted by Joy’s disapproving snort, “but should you be interested in a partnership, we have included a phone number at which I, the chief executive officer, Lee Youngjoon, may be reached. Optionally, my username--”

Joy missed a few words as she was shocked by the extreme sound emitted by the vibrator when she pushed a button on the remote control.

“--is ‘worldsover’. As you know, Second Ring specializes in sexual wellness products, of which we’ve sent you a wide variety. They can be enjoyed by couples, or can serve as a fantastic outlet for power singles like yourself…”

Sunny trailed off. Joy was afraid she knew what was coming. “Damn, Sunny. You say so much as three words on national television and they scramble to get right up on your ass, eh?”

It was too late. Sunny was already tipping up the bottom of the soju bottle. A few drops spluttered back out of her mouth as Joy pushed it back down. “Sunny! You’ve said it yourself! You don’t want to get married!”

“Doesn’t mean I’m not still lonely!”

Joy wrapped her arms around Sunny. “You’ve got me. And a million other friends!”

“Fans don’t count.” Sunny’s voice was partially muffled by Joy’s shoulder.

“Ouch. Time for me to delete my Sone club membership. But fine. A hundred other friends. It’s not just me. It’s my members. Your members. And plenty of others. All of NCT would be--Okay, nevermind. Aespa though! They love you too.”

“But I don't want to inconvenience you." Sunny ended so matter-of-factly that Joy had to pause to process the short conversation.

"You know how… You know how you take a road trip, and there's a road block, or really bad construction, and you have to take a detour?"

"Yeah. I'm a detour."

"Come on, Sunny. What you are is the scenic route!”

There was a long silence.

“Was that the end of the metaphor?” Sunny eventually asked.

“I am very drunk.”

“You’re not that drunk.”

“Drunk enough to be shit at metaphors.”

“It’s…” Sunny extricated herself from Joy’s hug. “It’s okay. I think I know what you’re getting at, and I appreciate it. It’s just that a few words don’t really fix a brain, you know?”

Joy nodded slowly, watching as Sogeum casually stalked across the room. “Yup. But believe me. I’m here for you, at least. So if you need a friend, or some company, I’m at the top of your list.”

The cat plopped herself on the floor, right up against Sunny’s leg. Joy giggled. “Fuck off, kitty. I just said I was the top.”

It seemed the topic of conversation was ready to change. Sunny smiled, and it was enough to indicate her understanding.

“So!” Joy moved things along. “A pile of free, top of the line sex toys in your living room. What’s a young woman to do about that?”

Sunny snorted. “Well I’m not going to masturbate while I have company over, that’s for sure.” She grabbed another box from the pile and handed it over, doing her best not to disturb Sogeum’s new resting place.

The new box took mere seconds to open, this time revealing a black silicone butt plug with a red gem in the base. The casing suggested that a picture could be inserted beneath the gem, and it appeared there was one already there as an example. Joy had to flip it around to a variety of angles before she could make out that it contained a headshot of Dreamcatcher’s Jiu making finger hearts on her cheeks. She cocked her head, wondering if the image had actually been authorized.

Another box swapped between the womens’ hands. It took Joy a little longer to open than the last, but it turned out to be that way for a good reason, given that it was gently holding some fragile cargo: A red-tinted glass bottle of lube, labeled as “Juice from the Fruit of The Tree.” The lengthy product title had a snake winding through the letters.

“Well now they’re just really doubling down on this theme, aren’t they?” Sunny asked as she worked out how to open the next package, using her bottle opener as a makeshift knife.

Joy laughed and picked up yet another, now eager to see what kind of wild object it would contain. “Yeah, they really are! No lie, they’re starting to give me some ideas. Talk about sinful.”

“‘Oh I know,’” Sunny mocked the company, as SM artists often did, fingers still struggling to find their way under the first cardboard flap. “‘Let’s send Sunny a whole pile of sex junk. Bet she’s sinful enough to use it all.’ Like, come on Love-eye, or whatever your name is. What’s a single woman gonna do with all this? Hold up a pillow fort?”

“Hey, maybe he doesn’t know you’re single. Maybe there’s some stuff in here that takes two to tangle with… Fuck. Choerry’s got me using alliterations.”

Sunny barely managed to get her fingers inside the box, but her knuckles were turning white from the tightness of it. It seemed that she had left a portion of the packing tape uncut. “I said I was single on the show, though. I don’t think there will be any couples’ toys in here.”

“Oooh, I’m gonna make it a bet now.” Joy smirked. Her next sentence bypassed her verbal filter through the holes left in it by the alcohol. “If you get that thing open and there’s a strap on inside, you have to fuck me with it!”

A jerk of her arms snapped the remainder of the packing tape. Sunny chuckled. “You’re on. There’s no way it is.”

Joy had to admit that Sunny had a point, considering how small the package was. Surely it couldn’t fit a series of leather straps, or a dildo any larger than a couple of inches in any direction. The little voice in the back of her mind that told her making such an offer was stupid quieted down somewhat.

There was a moment of quiet. Sogeum rolled away from Sunny and made her way to the kitchen. Joy picked up another box, confident that she hadn’t just placed herself in an awkward situation. Sunny shook her head, amused. And then…

“J-Joy?”

Joy looked back, but wasn’t quite sure what she was looking at. It was a sort of mass of black string with some silver discs hanging off of it. Another piece of pink paper fluttered to the floor, where Joy picked it up and read aloud.

“‘The Obol.’ As Charon ferried Dante across the Styx and into the hole that is Hell, so too shall this state-of-the-art magnetic harness ferry our exclusive Dante’s Dive dildo into your… partner’s hole…”

There was more to be read, but both women seemed to get the point. The only sound in the room came from Sogeum chomping through some hard cat food in the kitchen. Slowly, their eyes raised and met. They both spoke at the same moment.

“That was a bet’s a joke bet right?”

Their drunken minds needed a moment to detangle their words into distinct sentences. Sunny’s “That was a joke, right?” and Joy’s “A bet’s a bet.”

Sunny started again first. “You know, we don’t have to.”

“I will if you want to.”

Every sentence being exchanged was followed by a palpable stillness. Joy’s heart beat loudly in her own ears, and she swore she could hear Sunny’s too.

“Do you… want to fuck me with that, Sunny?”

Sunny answered instantly. “Yup.”

There was a flurry of action, though it was slowed here and there by a tipsy stumble or two. Sunny gathered up an armful of the items on her coffee table, both sex toys and the bottle of soju, and sprinted for the bedroom. Joy rushed after her, messily attempting and failing to remove some of her clothes on the way.

Sogeum was spooked by the sudden kerfuffle and fled out of sight.

The bedroom was no less hectic. Sunny dropped everything on the bed except the soju, which she took one more swig of directly from the bottle before setting it dangerously close to the edge of her desk. She wiggled out of her shirt and bra, which attracted Joy’s attention instantly.

Joy struck at Sunny’s cleavage, wrapping her fingers as far as they could go around the legendary orbs, and her lips around one of the budding tips. Their differences in height made it awkward, but they very soon found their way to a horizontal state that eased that tension. Unfortunately, it was not on the bed, but on the floor, but they weren’t about to let something like that stop them.

What clothes they were still wearing exploded off their bodies. Joy’s shorts and shirt, Sunny’s pants and socks. All of it ended up in different sections of the room, thrown under and over furniture.

Joy was no stranger to encounters like this, and neither was Sunny. They had shared countless stories with each other… and some spit. But neither had considered their prior make out sessions to be precursors to explicitly sexual action. For her part, however, Joy considered this one differently, and Sunny’s hands searching half-blindly for Joy’s ass confirmed to her that Sunny thought the same.

Backs arched. Legs ground against one another. Open mouths met, trading the alcoholic scents that the women no longer cared to distinguish. Their minds had devoted themselves entirely to the search for physical pleasure.

A lot of exploratory prodding led Sunny’s fingers to the entrance to Joy’s pussy, failing to notice the number of pokes that ended up at Joy's exit. She took some time familiarizing herself with the drenched outer folds.

Joy, however, noticed the poking at her ass. Her mind swam with serotonin, thoughts of other people, and alcoholic fumes that seemed to rearrange the letters of her thoughts into nonsense. Or possibly into inspiration.

Inspiration relevant to the happenings at the prior year's award shows, that is.

Joy tried to pull back the moment Sunny’s fingers dipped inside her. She had opened her mouth to speak but instead groaned and arched herself further into Sunny’s grip on her sanity. "S-Sunny. B-bed."

At least that message was received loud and clear. Sunny dragged her fingers against Joy’s G-spot as she, disappointingly, pulled them out, nearly causing Joy to scream. The same fingers plunged into Joy’s mouth and quieted her as she diligently sucked her own juices from them.

The action transferred to the bed. Fingers immediately found their places again, and Joy bounced on her back in time with Sunny’s brutal shoves. Packaging bounced all around them. It was like a desperate, distracted game of Vegetable Shinobi for Joy, swiping at the jumping dildo. Sunny’s fingers were divine, eye-wateringly so, but Joy wanted something unholy.

Sunny muttered Joy’s name, catching her attention again. She lifted her head to meet for yet another imprecise kiss. Their legs twisted around each other. Joy could hear the desperation in Sunny’s moans, vibrating all the way down her throat, burning like the alcohol. She snaked a hand between them and found Sunny’s clit.

The moans freed themselves as Sunny bucked backward, almost out of Joy’s longer reach. Joy noted the exceptional reaction, and flipped Sunny onto her back, following immediately and putting herself in the position of power Sunny had initiated.

“You’re gonna fuck me with the strap on… right, Sunny?”

Sunny’s eyes widened, and she grabbed the toys.

“No, not yet,” Joy stalled in her most seductive voice. She slid down, nearly falling off the bed, and wrenched Sunny’s legs wide open with her elbows.

Sunny clenched her fingers around the hell-themed dildo for dear life. Joy’s name poured through her lips over and over again as Joy’s lips poured over her pussy.

Joy had to fight Sunny’s strength to keep her spread thighs from clamping around her head. She wanted to keep hearing her senior beg, loud and clear. To that end, she dug in her tongue, unable to penetrate far, but far enough to open Sunny up and feel the wetness flow into her mouth.

“Please… Joy… I’m close… Joy, please! Joy, don’t stop!”

The thought flitted through Joy’s head, that perhaps denying Sunny her orgasm would be fun, but something about the way she said it made Joy wonder if Sunny’s neediness was rooted in her loneliness, more than in her desire to get off. She shifted herself to wrap her arms under Sunny’s legs and pulled. It wasn’t possible for them to be any physically closer than they were, but she wanted to make it feel like they could be.

Sunny’s voice cracked, choked, and broke into a scream. Joy winced as her tongue was squeezed uncomfortably, but she wasn’t about to stop. The back arches, hair grasping, and pained gasps that followed were worth it.

Joy kept it up until Sunny’s body fell back down and her muscles relaxed. Only then, she removed herself to ask, “Need a break before my turn?”

A smile crept up Sunny’s mouth. Her fingers tightened around the dildo she still had in her hand. “Get… back down here.”

If there was any benefit Joy appreciated most about idol training, it was recovery speed, and Sunny still had it. Joy picked up the strap, quickly figuring out how it was supposed to fit and sliding it up Sunny’s legs. The motion doubled as her approach for another make out.

Of course, Joy was still immensely horny. Her interest in making out with Sunny was overshadowed by her desire to get fucked savagely, but she had the wherewithal to hold out, to let it happen naturally. She was always good at letting others take the lead. Whether they led from the top or from the bottom didn’t especially matter to her.

The alcohol made her more impatient than usual though. She forced herself to wait for the five-speed pounding she’d get, but she ground herself against Sunny’s leg in the meantime. Thankfully she didn’t have to wait long. Sunny threw her to the side and attached the vibrator to the unusual strap with very little trouble. Joy fingered herself as she watched.

“Fuck, yes, Sunny. This is going to be so goo--”

Sunny practically tackled Joy. Their lips collided again, strap hovering somewhere between Joy’s legs, but not close enough for her to feel it.

The moment she did, though, Joy grabbed Sunny’s ass and pulled. The lack of accuracy was made up for by the inhuman amount of lubrication present; both Joy’s and the curious synthetic compound that the dildo exuded seemingly of its own volition.

It was almost too much for Joy. The dildo was certainly longer than any she had used before, and bottoming out at full speed meant it hit her rather painfully in the cervix. She hissed, but otherwise just readjusted her legs in Sunny’s way to prevent the same thing from happening so easily again.

The strap held the dildo in place on Sunny’s body well. Despite its genuinely small frame, it seemed to prevent all wiggling. Every one of Sunny’s movements, including the less delicate, more intoxicated ones, translated to sensations that felt to Joy like a biologically attached dick, albeit with a plethora of extra features.

"You're so pretty, Joy," Sunny said. Even though she was doing all the work now, she wasn't nearly as winded as before. Knowing she’d affected Sunny made Joy grin into another kiss.

“No you,” Joy said with a smirk. She knew this would be good, but she truly underestimated how great it would be to see Sunny’s famous tits jiggling with the effort of fucking her. The sheen of sweat covering them would ensure the night wouldn’t be forgotten, even if Joy had another drink or two.

Joy’s first orgasm struck quickly and unexpectedly. Her breath stopped and a shudder spiked through her body from her core to the tips of her toes and fingers and head. The ability to think normally left her for a brief moment. She only kept the fleeting question of whether or not Sunny was able to feel Joy’s climax. Stars popped in and out of existence, obscuring Joy’s view of Sunny’s fantastic body.

It all faded relatively soon after, but it wasn’t enough for Joy. As soon as her lungs refilled, she screamed, “More! Sunny! Fuck me! Fuck me! Oh god!” She was practically numb everywhere, except for every square inch of her that the dildo rubbed, slid, and vibrated against. Her arms and legs wrapped around Sunny on their own.

Joy, eyes half closed, barely registered when Sunny slowed down to grab and open the extra package. She did, however, notice the sudden prodding feeling at her asshole.

“Sun--”

She couldn’t even finish Sunny’s name before something slipped its way into her butt. Her vision cleared up enough to see that even while she continued thrusting, Sunny had one hand tucked between them, and it was the source of the extra intrusion.

A couple more thrusts though, and Joy was lost to the pleasure again. She started to pant instead of scream or moan, or perhaps she was whimpering, or speaking fluent Polish. Joy couldn’t have said one way or the other. Another orgasm hit. And another. And another. She knew some time was passing between each one, but whether it was seconds or days between no longer mattered. Her mind was fading out of existence.

Until, that is, it wasn’t.

With seemingly no provocation, Joy suddenly remembered Cheungae. She had been meaning to talk to Sunny about him before they had gotten drunk. Her mind wandered, far, far more than it normally would during such intense sex.

Cheungae had taken her out several times since their first, less-than-professional meeting at the MAMAs with Wheein. Even though Joy knew he was struggling financially, he always insisted on paying for coffee, but would give up if he saw the bill when Joy took him to some of the much higher end restaurants.

He was always so polite, genuine, and humble. He didn’t even question when Joy told him they couldn’t be in a relationship, but instead insisted that they could be friends. Joy wondered if it was fair to him that she was treating him as a boyfriend in every way but name while she was still having a grand old time fucking everyone else in the industry. Cheungae knew about it, but wasn’t part of it.

And yet, sex with Cheungae made Joy feel good. Great, even. She could recreate the sensations in her mind for days afterward. His slim, toned figure hovering over her, his face contorted beautifully in adorable agony, his admittedly mediocre cock managing to hit her just right with every move. She couldn’t stop picturing him.

Another orgasm smashed through Joy’s illusion. The mental image of perfectly human Cheungae was instantly replaced with the very physical image of god-like Sunny. As tended to happen, Joy held her breath as the climax coursed through her. Her muscles contracted until she was holding Sunny in a deathly grip.

“F-fuck. Sunn-ny. Slow… slow down.”

It seemed that the request was desperately needed by both lovers, because rather than simply slow down, Sunny fell over. Joy’s pussy immediately craved to be filled again, but she knew she needed to clear her head. And besides that, she still had an odd full sensation. When her muscles relaxed enough for her to move of her own volition, she reached beneath herself and recoiled again at the feeling of a drenched butt plug. Her fingertips carried a puddle of mixed cum and lube back up.

“I’m sorry… Joy… I think that’s all I have left in me,” Sunny said between gasps.

Joy made note of her own throat and how dry it was. Whatever sound she was making while she borderline hallucinated, she’d be regretting it for a while. “All good. I was losing my sanity. That was unbelievable.”

Sunny giggled. It sounded painful. “The vibrator… or the surprise plug?”

Joy giggled back. “The plug was definitely a surprise. Was that the one with Jiu's face in it?”

“Mhm.”

“Cool,” Joy sat up, her head swimming in the aftermath. “But I just think it was you using the stuff that made it so good.”

Sunny seemed invigorated by the compliments. She smiled and reached under the bed, making some noise and bringing up a bottle of water. The two of them swapped it back and forth until it was empty and then collapsed into one another, idly feeling each others' bodies up the whole time.

“Does that mean you’re up for another… night like this? Or day?” Sunny asked as she fondled Joy’s tits. It sounded like she had sobered up, at least most of the way. Joy was too afraid of what she would see to look at a clock.

“You fucking know it,” Joy responded while she brushed her fingers up and down Sunny’s inner thighs. It was a reflex for her to agree, but she cringed inwardly as soon as she did, realizing how much more sober she had become herself, and how she wished she wasn’t. She was thinking about Cheungae again.

There was a barrage of light kisses all over her face, neck, and chest. Sunny looked far too happy for Joy to feel okay about retracting her statement.

“Maybe not right now though,” Joy said, just in case Sunny was already getting ideas. “We should really get to bed.”

She didn’t hear any arguments. They simply got up, and only long enough to flip up the duvet, flinging all of the remaining sex toys off, and jumped underneath.

It took a minute for Joy to realize she needed to remove the surprise butt plug. It was easy enough, and she ended up tossing it to the floor without looking at it.

Joy wrapped herself around Sunny. She was usually the big spoon, not that it bothered her. Sunny’s bare back felt comfortably hot against her chest and stomach. Cheungae liked being the big spoon too. He’d swap with her all the time…

“Hey, Sunny?”

“Mmm?” Sunny was on the verge of sleep, it seemed.

Joy lowered her voice, barely above a whisper. “Have you ever thought about… Settling down, I guess? Just being with one person?”

She didn’t expect Sunny to have an immense store of wisdom, but she hoped for more than what she got: a snore.

“Good night to you too, Sunny.”

[bratkook]

sick entertainment. (m) kth

pairing. hitman!taehyung x hitman!reader genre. smut, pwp warnings. mentions of guns, slight depictions of violence/murder, they’re both hitmen please don’t read if whats mentioned is triggering, they make some dark jokes (they’re sick okay lmao) smut in forms of: oral sex, fingering, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, choking, dirty talk but its all playful despite it all hehe word count. 6.3k note. this is a request based off #85 off this prompt list (now closed) thank you for sending this in! 🖤 also uh….this may become a series, in which case, consider this a saucy prologue that gives you a glimpse into tae/oc’s...interesting... relationship

The slamming of the door makes Taehyung cock his eyebrow, a sly smile spreading across his face as he mindlessly watches the television, his ears listening to the way your feet stomp on the concrete floors of the loft, no doubt a trail of fire following your path. A laugh is begging to make its way out of him, chest trembling from holding it in because he knows he’s in deep shit, he’d known it the second he had interfered. 

Blame it on his playful personality, or maybe his need of meddling in business that very clearly wasn’t his, either way the second he heard the name of the next target you were assigned he knew he had to make a game out of it. Is it sick, or twisted? Maybe, but the man was a well known scumbag, a slimey wannabe mobster that has far too many hits out for him it’s a shock he still has a pulse, well had considering you were back now. 

Like every single assignment, he knew this one wouldn’t be missed, wouldn’t even have a news report made on him. It was the main reason why you were able to get away with it all, despite the police showing up for investigations whenever any unlucky bystander stumbled upon their body, they never seemed to dive deeper into who did it. They didn’t have to, they weren’t stupid, knowing not to bite the hand that fed them. 

As long as they continued to get a small portion of cash funneled into their department and you all continued to wipe out the low lives that made their job so hard, then there really was no crime committed. 

Namjoon called it transactional, but Taehyung called it boring. He liked it messy, enjoyed the thrill of it all, the possibility of not getting away with it, and with the help of police it took that all away from him. 

You knew he was up to no good, the gleam in his eyes when you had mentioned who you were hitting next spelled it out for you. Knowing Taehyung like the back of your hand made you wary, accustomed to the way his brain worked like a minefield, he was someone you had to watch from a distance and analyze before deciding your next move. 

“Welcome home honey.” Taehyung sings out playfully when he senses you getting closer, that same smile plastered on his face as he turns to face you, only getting wider when he notices the shiny black gun in your palm, one that actually belonged to him. It wasn’t your usual choice, something you no doubt swiped from its hiding spot when you came in, but you couldn’t exactly conceal the sniper you had used an hour prior enough to make it undetected in your hands on your way to your apartment. 

He knew it was currently disassembled and tucked into your backpack as you chucked it aside and marched your way over to him, hand clenched around the grip of his Ruger with murder so evident in your eyes. Taehyung doesn’t think you’ve ever looked cuter, even as you raise it up towards his chest once you close the distance between you. 

“You’re on thin ice Taehyung,” you laugh as you round the couch, standing directly in front of his sitting form, still casually sunken against the cushions as if you weren’t aiming for his heart. “You really think Namjoon’s going to let you come back if I tell him you’re playing games with my targets?”

Your boyfriend sighs at that, a roll of his eyes being sent your way as he drops his head to rest along the back of the couch with a groan. He didn’t need you to remind him of his current standing with Namjoon, knowing fully well that he had crossed a line by smashing that random man’s face into the fancy bar counter for simply looking at you. It wasn’t fair really, had he taken the time to get to know the guy he would have realized just how high up that random man was in terms of connections, but Taehyung could blame his tunnel vision for cutting the introductions short. 

Like you said, his brain was a minefield, one wrong step was all it took before his fingers were tangling into the poor man’s hair and connecting his face with the wooden counter. He wasn’t even sure what set him off, the edges of his sight blurring together as he wrapped his fingers around his throat, pulling out the small gun he always had tucked away with him, pressing the muzzle against his temple and laughing maniacally as the man tried to pry his hands off of him. 

He liked to keep things exciting, but unfortunately for him that excitement ended up costing Namjoon far too much in order to keep Taehyung from being thrown into jail, which would have arguably been a lot better than being stuck on what could be considered probation, no longer able to work unless Namjoon deemed it acceptable. 

“Children shouldn’t play with guns.” Taehyung mocks, hoping to distract you while his eyes stayed glued to the end of the barrel, following it as you inched it closer with a wicked smile on your face. He knew he was on thin ice, nearly ruining your shot, potentially resulting in the target escaping because of his stupid game. That wasn’t too big of an issue, the chase made it fun some times, but considering this target had a bigger money sign tacked onto their back there would be no way you could let a fuck up slide. 

He smiles still, lips curling up and showing his teeth as he focuses on your face now, seeing the way you look at him. You had those crazy eyes he loved to see, full of adrenaline, body still buzzing from earlier, analyzing his every move as you tuck the end of the cold barrel under his chin and slowly cock the safety back with a soft click. 

“Who said I was playing?”

The small flash of excitement sparks in his eyes as you dig the muzzle into his skin, his mouth dropping open as he breathes out a laugh, his large palm coming to clutch around your own, urging the gun further into his skin. 

“Do it,” he taunts, guiding your fingers to slide over the trigger, floating off of it as you observe him. 

“I should’ve done it the second I saw you leaving that bastards apartment” you threaten, remembering the rage you had felt when you witnessed your boyfriend exit the complex and look directly up at the building across from him, knowing you would be perched on the ledge with your gun aimed at the window as you waited. The childlike wave he had sent you from the ground made you want to change your aim towards him, the urge to pull the trigger only increasing when he sent you a simple text telling you to enjoy the chase. 

That was the first push of the domino that sent everything collapsing and as you peeked through the window and saw your target frantically packing a bag as he looked around you couldn’t stop the flash of annoyance from flaring inside of you. It didn’t take much guessing to figure out that Taehyung had notified him that his head was on the line and now he was going to try to run. 

It was supposed to be a clean job, it was the main reason you preferred to use a sniper instead of the slightly more intimate methods used by the others, all you had to do was disassemble your Sako and get yourself off whatever ledge you were on and that was it, job completed. Anticipating a chase was not something you thought would happen today but the second he began to shove clothes into some random bag you knew you were losing your window of opportunity. 

“How far did he get?” Taehyung laughs, eyes full of mischief as you glare at him, that tiny smirk on your face giving you away, showing him just how amused you were at his antics despite the gun pressed against his skin

“The stairwell.” You knew the layout of his building well enough to know exactly what exit route he would take, beginning the chase Taehyung had been so eager to start. Having to get down from your spot and somehow beat him before he left his apartment was too far fetched, but catching him before he exited the complex completely was the only thing that kept you from admitting defeat. 

Your heart continues to rapidly beat in your chest as you recall it, how your lungs had burned as you took the stairs two at a time once you managed to get inside the complex, nearly ramming into your target as he rounded the stairwell in his haste to leave undetected. 

Had it not been for his already set paranoia he would have simply shoved you aside, not expecting a girl to be the one in charge of taking him out, but the second he spots the unhinged look in your face, the way your eyes glimmer when you realize you caught him, he knows it's too late to run. Thankfully for you, he accepted his fate pretty easily after that. 

“Did you leave a mess?” 

“I couldn’t use my Sako you asshole.”

Taehyung laughs freely now, his other hand coming to scoop around your waist and pull you closer, your thighs slotting between his. If you couldn’t use your precious Sako he knew you were pissed, hence the gun to his throat. There was nothing you hated more than having to come in close contact with whoever you were meant to kill, you weren’t a fan of the bargaining they tried to make with you, not particularly enjoying seeing their face as you pressed the suppressor of your Beretta between their eyes before you pulled the trigger. 

“Is that why you’re so trigger happy right now?” He’s taunting you, biting his lip as he smiles up at you, eyes widening slightly as you gingerly place your finger on the trigger. “C’mon, teach me a lesson. Shoot me.”

You don’t need to be told twice. 

The second the last word leaves his mouth, your finger presses down on the trigger, the brief moment of shock is painted across his face when he hears the click, eyes squinting when he expects the searing pain that was sure to follow but it never came. In a blink of an eye his hands are expertly releasing the magazine of his Ruger, letting it fall into his grip as he brings it close to really check to see that it was in fact empty, something you no doubt did the second you entered the loft. 

Your joyous laughter fills the air instantly, dropping the gun from its position as you lose yourself in the giggles that escape you. “You should have seen your face.”

Taehyung continues to stare at the empty magazine, looking up at you incredulously, the beginning of a smile once again gracing his face at the pure shock that you actually pulled the trigger. “You were gonna fucking shoot me.”

“Oh please, like I’d ever shoot you–“

“You have!” He remarks, snatching the gun from your grasp and sliding the magazine back into place, remembering the time you gave him a warning shot to the shoulder the last time he tried to meddle in your business. Sure you might have just grazed his skin but a trigger was still pulled. 

Taehyung chuckles when you plop onto the couch next to him, body still trembling with laughter as you wipe underneath your eyes for any stray tears. “Don’t tell me to shoot you if you don’t actually want me to”

“You’re a psycho,” he jests, tossing the gun safely aside as he faces you, seeing the oh so innocent smile on your lips. 

“Don’t act so surprised.” He’s not, knowing you were two peas in a pod, just the right amount of crazy to level each other out, if any more was added to either of you there would no doubt be actual shots fired. It worked though, a nice balance between you that allowed the relationship to go on as long as it has. 

“You’d never actually do it,” he sighs, slinging an arm over your shoulder and pulling you into his side, smug with the fact that you would never actually hurt him. “You’d miss me too much.”

“Would I?” A teasing laugh fills the air as your hand glides up his chest, fingers trailing towards his neck until they curl around his skin, feeling the rhythmic pulsing of his heart. When your fingers tighten around his neck he chuckles, the vibrations felt against your palm. 

The arm slung around your shoulder slides down to your back, scooping you over until you’re settling onto his thighs in his favorite position, a mischievous glint to his eyes flashing when you look at him.  “You definitely would baby, who else would be here to drive you crazy like I do?” His deep voice pulls you in, dripping from his tongue in a manner that makes you want to lean forward and savor every drop. 

“Should we find out?”

Taehyung just drops his head back once more, a cynical lift to his lips when you bring up your second hand to wrap around his thick neck, fingers digging further into his skin. “Please, don’t threaten me with a good time.”

“You’re sick,” you laugh out, squealing when his hands tighten their grip around your waist, his head leveling out as he stares at you with that same glint in his eyes. 

“I know I am, but you like it.” A gasp leaves your mouth as he slides you further up his lap, clothed core pressing into the slowly growing bulge in his pants. “Don’t act like I forgot the little stunt you pulled this morning.” 

Flashes of this morning play in your mind, the way you had teased him the minute he woke up and felt his cock pressed against you. You couldn’t help yourself when you rolled on top of him, kissing and biting his neck while you slowly rolled your hips above him. Taehyung honestly isn’t complaining about it, who wouldn’t love starting their morning off with their girlfriend so hell bent on making them cum.

The only downside of it all was the fact that you actually hadn’t made him cum, leaving him high and dry with an evil laugh as you rolled back off of him and went about your morning as if you hadn’t just committed an awful crime. That may be the reason Taehyung was so insistent on making your assignment tonight a fun little game for the two of you to play and now that that was done and over with he could finally have you on top of him just like this morning.

“You’re telling me you don’t like when I play games with you?” He huffs out a laugh at the teasing kick to your voice, a sinful smile on your lips as you allow him to unzip your sweater, tugging the loose material off your body to reveal the simple black shirt you wore underneath.

“That wasn’t a game, it was torture.” His words are muffled as he leans forward, lips pressing kisses into your skin, breath fanning out and sending tingles down your spine. It was funny how he could pick and choose what was classified as a game, the earlier antics he caused seeming more like torture than you grinding on him at the crack of dawn but you’d let him believe it.

The hold you have on his neck loosens, your arms spreading out to allow him to slip the sweater off of you entirely, large palms now coming to roam over the small sliver of exposed skin that peeked out under the hem of your shirt. “You know what would be so hot?” His cold fingers leave a trail of goosebumps as he inches the material up, little by little, revealing your belly button, the edge of your bra coming next as you hum in question. 

“If you ever wore some hot ass latex or leather on the job.” He groans unabashedly at the thought of you in a tight leather corset, boobs accentuated as it hugged your skin. Maybe you’d wear a cute little garter with your Beretta tucked into it, or one of those adorable daggers you had grown so fond of recently. 

It might be a wet dream of his but you just snort at the thought, not being able to imagine yourself getting a decent shot with something so restrictive on, god forbid Taehyung decided to play another game of cat and mouse you’re not so sure a leather corset would hold as you chased your target. 

“That's so impractical, I’ll do it for you here though.” That appeases him, a smug smile on his lips as he continues to pull up your shirt, taking his time as if he was unwrapping his favorite present. With your red bra fully revealed he sighs in appreciation, tossing the shirt aside without a care to fully admire you. 

His hands cup over your bra, thumbs gently tracing the swell of your breasts before giving a rough squeeze that makes you breathe out a laugh. “Will you really?” He questions, keeping a good hold on you as he flips you over, flat on your back with your head resting by the armrest of the couch. Your elbows hold you up as you smile at him, dazed as you watch him tug up his grey shirt and throw it off to the side. 

“Yeah, only if you buy that cute maid costume I found and wear it for me.” Taehyung doesn’t even think twice before agreeing, stomach tensing up as your fingers trace along his skin, circling around the random scars that litter his body from close encounters and senseless fights. They serve as physical reminders of your boyfriend’s careless behavior, that minefield mentality making the worst decisions possible in the name of getting a quick thrill. You follow them up until you reach the tiny scar you were responsible for on his shoulder, shallow and faded to a lighter tan now that it was healed.

“I told you, you’re trigger happy.” His hand grasps your own, bringing it back down to the couch as he chuckles. “I think you’re a danger to society Y/N.” 

“Hm, am I?” Your voice drawls out as you stretch out, enjoying the way he watches you like a predator would his prey, sharp eyes hyper focused on your every move and you swear he can hear how your heart races in your chest. When he simply hums in response, nimble fingers beginning to unbutton your jeans, you can only giggle and help him as best as you can, lifting your hips and pulling your legs until the tight material has joined the growing pile on the floor.

Taehyung slots between your thighs with ease now, hands digging into the sofa as he holds himself up and leans forward to kiss you once more. His breath is felt on your face as he groans at the taste of you, forever loving the feeling of your lips on his, an endless craving he would never get over. You taste like your favorite chapstick, sweet like candy, and when his tongue peeks out to get a better dose you breathe his name out in a sigh that sounds like music to his ears.

Resting his weight on his knees, his hands are set on their mission, palms sliding underneath you until they reach the back clasp of your bra, expertly unhooking it until it snaps against your skin. A playful laugh is passed between your mouths as he does so, his teeth gently nipping at your lips before he begins his descent. Sloppy kisses are pressed along your jaw as he pulls the straps of your garment down your arms and lets it fall onto the floor.

As he reaches the juncture of your neck he takes a nice inhale, chuckling when he catches the hint of your sweet shampoo mixed with the metallic tang of gunpowder. “You smell like work–“

“Get off, I’m gonna shower!” You try to swat him off of you but he’s quick to grasp your hands, pinning them above your head, giving you a wicked smile as he stares down at you, loving the way your nose twitches in anger at being held down by his arms and hips. 

So cute. 

“No, I finally have you right where I want you.”

“Is that so?” Taehyung chooses not to answer you as he starts to continue the trail of kisses down your neck, grabbing both wrists in one hand as his other trails down your chest. The ticklish feeling leaves you fidgeting around as he grabs a handful of your tits, squeezing the flesh before slowly circling around your nipple until it hardens at the sensation. The wet path of kisses passes your collarbones, soft smacks of his lips on your skin as he nears your neglected breast, kisses around the swell of them in a teasing way.

When he finally envelopes your other nipple into his mouth you gasp, arching your back to push more of you into his mouth, feeling the vibrating hum against your skin as his tongue flicks around your areola. Tingles shoot up your spine as he pinches your nipple in his fingers, pinching and rolling the bud between his grasp, the feeling of his sharp teeth press into your skin when he smiles at the way you react to his touch, soft moans flowing past your lips the longer he teases you.

With a slight pop, he releases your nipple, a satisfied laugh hitting the air when he sees the way it’s covered in a sheen of his saliva, rising and falling with each of your breaths. His palm still holds your hands hostage but as you fidget in his grasp he releases them, allowing you to tangle your fingers in his hair, yanking at the soft tufts of dark brown until you were content.

“So this is right where you want me?”

“Almost.”

“Almost?”

“Yeah,” he leans up and kisses you once more before trailing down your body, your hands still tangled in his hair as he descends in the same fashion as before, an endless trail of smooches down your ribs, across your torso and around your belly button. The final kisses are pressed into your hips as his fingers hook into the band of your underwear, pulling the waistband of your matching red thong up at the sides and letting it snap against your skin like an annoying child, snickering at the sound it makes. 

When you nudge your knee against his sides he stops fooling around, finally yanking them down your thighs, gingerly unhooking them from around your feets to be forgotten entirely now that he stares down at your exposed pussy. A smile graces his face at the sight, folds wet and glistening, already messy in a way he couldn’t resist as he glides his face against your inner thighs. “This is where I want you.”

Your fingers twirl around his hair as he messily kisses around your lower lips, eyes falling shut as you focus on each touch on your body, the brief nudge of his nose, the had press of his lips and finally, the cool sensation of his saliva as he licks a broad stripe up your slit, tongue collecting the drips of your arousal. 

“Fuck, Taehyung.” It comes out as a mewl, head dropping back in awe when he repeats the motion, tongue slipping through your folds, the tip of it meeting your clit in a small jolt that leaves you breathless. He could do this all day, feel each stinging pull on his scalp that accompanies each flick of his tongue, your cries of pleasure only increasing when he spreads your folds apart and dives in with new set determination.

The messy smacks and slurps blend in with your choked breath, mingling in between each gasped syllable that make up his name, pleas of more that he can’t deny. Soft lips wrap around your sensitive nub, sucking gently in a way he knows you love, spelled out by your thighs spreading further apart, hips rutting into his face in desperation.

These deliberate flicks against your bundle of nerves are set to tease, proven when he stops altogether with an evil smile, your arousal coating his chin but he doesn’t mind it, revelling in the harsh yank you deliver to his hair at his stopping.

“Baby has a temper, it sucks to be teased huh?” Taehyung’s words are spoken through a smirk, mouth dropped open as he laughs carelessly, head pulled back by your hold on his hair. The cute pout on your lips doesn’t look threatening in the least, not when he can see just how close you are to falling apart, the subtle twitch of your thighs being telling enough.

“I promise, I’ll never do that again. Just make me cum, please.” His eyes glimmer now, teeth biting down on his lower lip when you guide him back down to your swollen lips, wet with a mixture of your arousal and his spit.

“Deal.” Without wasting another second, his lips are back on you, long fingers joining in as he circles your entrance, slowly easing their way inside in a familiar stretch that makes you arch your back. He smiles against you as he feels the tight ring of muscles wrapped around him, the soft walls of your pussy felt along his fingertips as he curves his digits inside of you, not content until you’re gasping above him as he tickles along your gspot.

“K-keep doing that.” You beg him, mouth dropping open as another moan spills out when he does as you ask, fingers pumping into you, rubbing along your sweet patch as his tongue continues to ravish you, circling and sucking on your clit to give you the release you crave.

“Ah, fuck I’m close.”

Taehyung holds in his laugh as your feet slide along the top of the couch, searching for some leverage as you lose yourself in the feeling. The grip you have on his hair tightens as you near your release, body set alight with each thrust of his fingers, eyes screwed shut as you savor it all. He can feel the way your walls squeeze his fingers, leaving his cock hard in his jeans when he thinks of the way your walls will feel around him next.

With a final flick against your clit you’re shouting out his name, flashes of light sparking behind your closed lids as your body tenses up, limbs rendered useless as the wave of your climax washes over you. Taehyung always loved the way your bones turned into jello when the pleasure rocked through you, fingers losing their grip and thighs flopping onto the couch when he pulled away, face looking entirely satisfied by your reaction.

“That was exactly how I wanted you.” A messy kiss is placed onto your hip once more, leaving a wet spot in its wake that can be attributed to the remnants of your orgasm coating his lips.

“Yeah, you know how I want you?” you pant, giggling when his kisses turn ticklish, eyes looking up at you in question. “Fucking me so hard I forget I’m still mad at you.”

Oh, he could do that no problem. 

It’s almost comical how quickly he’s able to get out of his jeans and underwear, his hand wrapping around his cock as he kneels onto the couch again. A smile spreads along his lips when he takes note of the look on your face as you stare at him, eyes following his hand as he lazily pumps his length. 

There's pure mischief in your eyes, a tiny devil on your shoulder that cheers at the prospect of you getting what you want, thighs spreading further apart in invitation for him. Taehyung presses his lips together as his thumb rolls over the tip of his cock, smearing the beads of precum around the swollen head before giving himself a gentle squeeze as he inches forward. 

It feels like time stands still as you watch with bated breath when he guides his cock to your entrance, a gasp slipping through your lips when he slaps the head of his cock against your sensitive clit, enjoying the small shudder that courses through your body with a discreet laugh.

“Taehyung,” you whine, rutting your hips up impatiently for him to hurry up. He finds pleasure in this though, his constant need to play games with you out ruling anything else.

“What?” He probes, smiling at you as if he didn’t have his dick inches from entering you.

“Fuck me, c’mon.” Your words trail off as his tip presses against you, slowly breaching your entrance in a familiar stretch that leaves your mind spinning. Taehyung can’t even get himself to make a sly remark like he always does, tease you about how messy you were before he even properly fucked you, no his head is wiped out of any witty comment, only able to focus on how amazing you feel around him. 

“Shit,” he gasps out, sliding into you with ease from how wet you were, the slick coating your thighs and dripping down onto the couch beneath you. You find comfort in the feeling of his hands sliding up your thighs as he bottoms out, fingers gripping onto your hips so tightly it dimples your skin, holding you still before sliding back out of you in a wet squelch. Taehyung can’t get himself to look away at the visual, how his cock shines in the light, coated in the strings of your arousal.

A choked moan reaches his ears the second he starts to thrust into you, hands keeping you still to prevent you from sliding around from the quick pace he knows you love. Your own hands scramble to reach down, fingers wrapping around his arms to ground yourself as he snaps his hips into you, the laughter mixing with delighted moans letting him know he wasn’t being too rough. No you would never think that, wanting nothing more than to let Taehyung have his way with you, hips knocking into yours with each rock, the head of his cock kissing your cervix in a dull throb that left your nerves on edge.

“Just like that,” you mewl, his attention dragging away from your soaked cunt, looking up at you and seeing the dazed expression on your face. Seeing you like this definitely topped the adorable way you had held a gun to his chest, broken down and vulnerable all because of him. It was a privilege he didn’t take lightly, allowed to see you in a light he knew others hadn’t.

“Fuck you feel so good, so warm,” his words are spoken quietly, almost like a train of thought that hadn’t meant to escape but he means them, completely lost in the way your walls flutter around him, each pulse leaving him grunting in ecstasy. 

“You’re right,” you start with a laugh, “I would miss you”

That grabs his attention, hips never slowing as he tilts his head in curiosity. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah, no one else could fuck me as good as you do.” He chuckles at that, looking down at you and seeing the evil glint in your eyes as you smile, voice as sweet as honey when you ask him, “Would you miss me?”

Taehyung hums thoughtfully at your question, eyes falling shut when you clench around him on purpose, a teasing laugh leaving your lips as his mind blanks momentarily. “I don’t know, should we find out?” He mocks your earlier phrase as he trails his own hand up your body to your neck, large palm easily wrapping around it. He’s no stranger to the flash of excitement on your face, having grown used to the way you’d beg him to choke you so often it was like second nature now.

Call it sick but it made your brain turn into mush, made you abandon all dignity whenever he wrapped his hands around you. Maybe it should instill a sense of fear into you, knowing those same hands had done so much harm to others, the countless times they’ve been wrapped around other targets with the intent to kill. The soft glimmer in his eyes settles any thoughts before you can even have them, the twisted version of love spelled out in the curl of his lips as he asks if this is okay comforts you because you know he’ll never actually hurt you. 

“Tighter,” you mumble out, smirking when he listens, fingers pressing into your skin deliciously. The minute his hands are properly wrapped around you its like your body is lit up, every nerve ending spazzing out, allowing you to feel the pleasure tenfold as his cock continues to fuck you. Each obscene squelch of his cock mixed with the added feeling of him grinding into your clit makes your brain go fuzzy, your legs wrapping around his waist in an effort to keep him closer.

Taehyung knew you loved to be choked, loved to feel the pounding of your blood rushing through your ears, the way the edges of your vision would fade out, his own face speckled in black as the feeling spread. His eyes never leave yours, amazement displayed in them at seeing you fall apart, your small hand laying on top of his in a sense of security. Your chest rises and falls with each breath, the moans and cries only getting softer as your orgasm approaches you, eyes threatening to close.

He knows the signs too well, waiting for the right moment and just before he knows you’ll cum he releases your throat, the sudden rush of unrestricted blood flow pushing you over the edge and intensifying the feeling. It’s evident in the way you gush around his cock, body tensing as your climax crashes through you, your arms desperately clinging onto him as he fucks you through it, soft hushes and whispers pressed into your skin as he kisses you gently. 

Your mind wipes out entirely, eyes screwed shut as you come down, body buzzing with sensitivity as you ooze around his cock, leaving an unholy mess beneath you. “Fuck, I’m cumming.” He groans out, the desperate cries and soft mewls of his name are what finally push him over, spilling into you in ribbons of white, rutting his hips a few more times before stilling altogether, panting above you with sweat coating his hairline.

“I’d miss you too.” He mumbles out with a shy smile, gently brushing away the stray hairs from your face as you try to catch your breath. His face looks soft now, almost squishy as his cheeks puff out, it was hard to believe that was the face of a killer.

“Hmm, certified psycho Kim Taehyung goes soft for his girlfriend, who should I notify?” 

He snorts at your retort, pulling out of you only to flop on top of you without a care in the world, nuzzling his face into your hair because he secretly loved the smell of your shampoo mixed with the gunpowder he had teased you about earlier. “Maybe the FBI, I’m pretty sure they’d love to know the name of any accomplice.”

“I’m not your accomplice.”

“Right my bad, they think I work alone.” He chuckles as he recounts the way the crooked cops had notified them of the FBI’s increased interest in Taehyung after he had smashed that man’s head in. Really who would have pegged the guy as an FBI agent. It didn’t raise too many concerns for him though, Taehyung hardly meddled in foreign affairs in the states anyways. 

Before you’re able to tease him about his fuck ups once more the incessant ring of your phone drones off from the floor. With a groan from Taehyung he’s reaching down and pulling the device free from your sweater’s pocket,seeing it was Namjoon calling, no doubt ready to ask how the assignment went but Taehyung swipes the screen to answer. 

“You know, you really know how to kill the mood.”

Your jaw drops as you laugh, attempting to swat at him to grab your phone free from it’s confines but he’s determined, holding it tightly against his ears with a devilish smile.

“Keep it up Taehyung, you’ll be on probation until I say so.” Namjoon’s voice is heard loud and clear through your phone’s speaker, the eye roll your boyfriend gives being comical enough, his mood being dampened at the reminder. With a pout of his lips he’s handing you the phone, getting off of you with a slight grimace when he feels just how sweaty you two had gotten.

Your conversation is quick, finished by the time he was done cleaning up, exiting your room with new clothes on and your favorite robe to hand you. The very evident smile on your lips shows whatever you two talked about must have been good, no doubt having gotten endless praise from Namjoon along with a new assignment. “I know that smile, what’s up.”

Slipping the robe on with a sigh you stand up and wrap your arms around his waist, peering up at him in delight. “I get to use my Sako next week.”

He can only shake his head at the tone in your voice, speaking about using your favorite gun on a target like it was a shiny new doll for you to play with. “You’re psycho you know that.”

“Yeah, but you love it.”