#my love was mime all mine or something

[vamppvania]

Thinking abt ai betty "dying" in front of Simon and her final action as an ai built on bettys memories, was to leave Simon agonizing over what she was trying to tell him before she glitches out. When asked, she says, "I only said that so you wouldn't stop thinking about me." Like. Betty wanting to possess Simon's mind rearranging it's coding to her ends and disregarding simons protests. Despising ice king because he doesn't remember her. Despising the crown. It wasn't because of some kind of blind following. It wasn't because Simon was simply selfish. She did these things because She was selfish, stubborn, determined to do things her way and no one else's (not even simons!) Something beautiful was taken from her and she will get it back!!!!!! She was not some poor hapless innocent girl! She has committed atrocities and by god I refuse to disregard her affinity for the extreme, the reckless, the self destructive to say it's all simons fault for not getting on a bus or something. I guess what im saying is support women's wrongs <3

[onceuponastory]

one single word - bucky barnes x reader

Plot: In a world where the first thing your soulmate says to you is somewhere on your body, Y/N soon realises that hers is not what she expected... or what she wants. (Soulmate!AU). Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader Warnings: Just some swearing and reader worrying she's going to end up alone. As always, if I miss any triggers, please let me know. Notes: This is my piece for @lunarbuck's Soulmate AU writing challenge! Congrats on 2k! Also can't believe it took me so long to use a pic of Seb from this day because he looked SO GOOD. Not beta’d, so any mistakes are my own.

“Has your word shown up yet? Just got mine!” Wanda’s text comes in. Groaning, Y/N types back a reply.

“Yup.” Immediately, Wanda sends another.

“It’s that bad? I’ll be straight over.” She promises, and Y/N goes back to staring at herself in the mirror, unable to tear her gaze away from the word which is now on her side. From a young age, Y/N and everyone else in this world were told that when they got older, the first words their soulmate said to them would soon appear on their body somewhere, disappearing only when they met the soulmate in question. And of course, it led to a lot of excitement and nervous apprehension as people wondered what words would be there, and imagined what scenario they’d meet their soulmate in. 

None more so than Y/N. As she grew up, she became an author, which meant that writing loving words about others became her job, and something she now has a huge amount of experience in. All day every day, she writes paragraph after paragraph of people describing how beautiful their partners are, how much their heart beats whenever they’re around, and how they want to spend the rest of eternity with them. And the entire time, Y/N’s own soulmate is in the back of her mind, as well as her hope that their first meeting is as romantic as her stories. So obviously, Y/N had grown to expect that the words - her words - that her soulmate would end up having on their skin would be something beautiful, like poetry.

Unfortunately for Y/N, though, it seems her soulmate didn’t have the same consideration for her.

Because there, on her side, emblazoned in huge letters is one single word. “Fuck.” “It’s not that bad.” Wanda soothes as she studies the word. Thankfully, she showed up soon after receiving Y/N’s text for moral support. 

“Yes, it is! Today I wrote someone saying their lover’s eyes are as bright as the stars, and with them they feel whole. And do I get that? No, I get ‘Fuck!’”

“Maybe he’s saying ‘Fuck.’ but then he says ‘you’re the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever seen’?”

“Or it could be ‘fuck’ because they stepped on my toes. Or maybe they dropped coffee on me? Or-” Y/N shakes her head, trying to shake herself out of her panic. Yet, it only intensifies. “And besides, it’s such a general word! What if I get confused and think someone else is my soulmate?”

“That isn’t going to happen. Personally, I think we have a strong, intense emotional bond with them, so we’ll just know it’s them when we see them.”

“You’re such a romantic, Wanda.”

“Says you.” She rolls her eyes. When Y/N freaks out a little again, Wanda shushes her with a gentle: “Calm down. You’re going to give me a headache at this rate. And besides, it could be worse! Mine is ‘Hello there’. What even is that?!” she groans, taking another sip from her drink.

“Oh please, yours is suave and sophisticated.” Y/N argues. “Maybe it’s a ‘Hello there.’” She mimes a smirk, looking Wanda up and down. “And then he says, ‘may I just say that you are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen?’”

“Either that or they’re doing a horrendously bad Obi-Wan Kenobi impression.” Wanda counters, making her and Y/N dissolve into fits of giggles. “But seriously. You don’t know what causes him to say that. Nobody does. That’s the beauty of soulmates.” She grins reassuringly. “And besides, I’m sure it’ll be a funny story to tell your kids one day.” 

And for a while, her reassuring words worked, and Y/N's feelings about the word permanently inked onto her side improved slightly. But the longer time went on without meeting her soulmate, Y/N started to think they don’t exist at all. And what’s worse, she’d be stuck with this single word on her side for the rest of her life, an enduring reminder of her failure to find her true love.

A few months later,

Y/N walks down the street, preoccupied by her phone call. Her publisher has been ringing her almost every day this week, desperate to know when they can expect her next manuscript. The same manuscript that’s been sitting incomplete on her laptop for the last several months. Understandably, love hasn’t been high on the list of Y/N’s priorities ever since she realised what her soulmate’s first word to her was. 

When she catches sight of herself in a shop window, noticing the hem of her sweater has ridden up, exposing the k and most of the c of the word on her side, it makes her feel worse. Of course, she still hasn’t found her soulmate. Nothing like yet another reminder of how you’re failing in life. Quickly rolling down her sweater, covering the word that seems to be burned into her skin by this point, Y/N keeps walking. In a last-ditch attempt to find some productivity and get this fucking manuscript finished, she’s decided to visit her favourite coffee shop. That and she just really wants an iced coffee. 

“When…if I ever find my soulmate, I’m going to give them a piece of my mind.” She huffs, reaching out to grab the door handle to the coffee shop. Before she can open it, the door slams open, almost hitting her in the face. Luckily, Y/N manages to dodge the figure that almost crashes into her. This is the last fucking thing she needs right now. She rounds on the man, ready to give him a piece of her mind, to ask him, no, demand that he looks where he’s going next time, and be careful!

That’s what she wanted to say. What she should’ve said.

The beautiful pair of blue eyes she suddenly finds herself staring into stops her. As blue as the sky on a gorgeous summer's day, as blue as the ocean, inviting her into their depths. This man is gorgeous. His muscles bulge out through the blue shirt (the same colour as his eyes) he has opened over a vest top. His brunette hair is pulled into a man bun, a few loose tendrils sticking out. The man’s eyes widen as he takes her all in, realising how close he came to spilling his coffee all over her. 

And then he speaks.

“Fuck.” He murmurs, his voice just loud enough for her and only her to hear. Immediately, Y/N registers her heartbeat stop.

“What did you just say?” She gasps. Instead of repeating his words, the man’s eyes widen even more, almost bulging out of his head. He rolls down the sleeve of his shirt, displaying the slowly fading words printed on his shoulder. 

“What did you just say?”

“Does yours say ‘fuck’, by any chance?” The man chuckles, still clearly in shock, and wordlessly, Y/N nods, lifting her sweater to show him.

“Oh, my god.” They both speak at the same time. The man holds a hand out, which Y/N shakes. “I’m Bucky. It’s wonderful to finally meet you.” Nervously he rubs the back of his neck, and Y/N notices a burst of pink spreading across his cheeks. “Can I just say you look absolutely gorgeous?” He stammers a little. “Sorry, I’m not entirely sure what I’m supposed to say right now. It’s not everyday you meet your soulmate.”

“We have a strong, intense emotional bond with them, so we’ll just know it’s them when we see them.” Wanda’s words echo in her mind, and Y/N’s shock turns into a smile, all thoughts of giving her soulmate a piece of her mind gone as quickly as the word on her side. At first she brushed Wanda’s words aside, but she’s actually totally right. Being with Bucky, it finally feels right. Like the missing pieces she’s spent so long looking for are finally in place.

“I know.” Y/N nods. “But it’s completely understandable. To be honest, I’m still in shock too. I’m Y/N by the way.” 

"Y/N." Bucky smiles.“I am sorry for almost spilling my coffee over you.” He chuckles, and Y/N giggles. 

“Already forgotten about.”

“I, um, I need to head off, but how about we grab some dinner tonight?” Bucky grins. “We have a lifetime to catch up on.” 

“Sounds wonderful.” Y/N smiles.

It may not have been the most perfect meeting… at least, not compared to her romance novels, but Y/N doesn’t care. Because it turned out to be perfect for her.

Please follow @onceuponastory-library and turn on notifications to be notified when I next post!

[zeenica]

TS4 «Freak Show» 15 DAY CAS CHALLENGE .ᐟ

I was looking for a challenge about clowns but I didn't find anything. Maybe it was worth looking deeper but I still decided to come up with mine! First of all I created it for myself to diversify the creation of my occult sims. But I want to share it here, in case someone was also looking for something like that. Or if you are interested in this challenge!

I love Halloween challenges but I want something individual and the clown is a rather interesting and colorful character.

I dug through the Internet to find as much information as possible about clowning and clown species. This challenge included 14 clowns (+ your own) so it will last 15 days!

You can use any cc content. Unleash your imagination ༄

──────────────── ㅤ˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ㅤ────────────────

Classic (Circus) Clown

Pierrot (Sad Clown)

Mime

Clown Doll

The Killer Clown

Harlequin (The Joke)

”Charlie Chaplin”

Circus Freak Clown (use ss with physical disabilities)

Clownfish

Joker

Black&White Clown

Ronald MacDonald

Fairytale Clown (should be in delicate colors)

King/Queen of Clowns

Your Individual Clown

──────────────── ㅤ˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ㅤ────────────────

If you participate tag me @zeenica so I can see your amazing clown sims ♡ˎˊ˗

@ts4challengehub & @simschallenges

[maxverstappensflatbrim]

Show Me Yours | Matty Healy [46]

chapter forty-six, act six: be my mistake

masterlist

December 25th 2017

It takes Tommie forty minutes to stop staring at the front door as if he’s going to walk right back through. When she finally does leave the hallway her gaze settles onto the wrapped gift still untouched. 

She’s sitting criss crossed under her green Christmas tree with Button on one side and Allen the other.

The wrapping paper has little dinosaurs wearing cowboy hats, which upon further inspection she realises have been drawn on by hand. She tears it open, then folds it neatly and places it to her side. Her eyes tear up, her thumb traces the leather. 

It’s her book. 

Her lyric book she thought lost forever sits right there in her hands with a blue post it note on top.

‘ Don’t worry, I didn’t punch him, Ross did (again).’

She giggles to herself as she takes the post it note and slots it inside to a page in the middle of the book, the one with the first ever draft of her poem ‘show me yours’.

Beneath the old brown leather book is a very similar one. The exact same book instead this one is a dark green colour.

She flicks open the first page and finds a note has been drawn on the inside cover.

‘The day that I met you I started dreaming. Now I write them down if I remember in the morning

-Yours, Matty’

A few pages have been written on, he writes on one side of a double page then leaves the other blank so she can fill in her own thoughts or change what he has written.

They’re songs. Songs he had written in rehab. About her. For her. She’s not sure yet.

Her eyes scan the pages as she flicks through them all, taking note of the titles scribbled in red ink.

Inside your mind Love it if we made it Be my mistake Sincerity is scary If it’s not with you Mine In love Sometimes About you Playing on my mind

She reads them all. Over and over and over. She only adds to one of the songs he’s written. 

She finds inspiration, she writes. She writes a lot, poetry which turn into songs and songs which become poetry. She finds herself finishing songs from her old book that she’d begun writing years ago. Love songs she’d tried to write about Caleb seem to fall together with a new inspiration in mind.

Matty.

Even in the breakup songs she finds ways to reference him in some way.

She can’t help it. There’s a piece of Matty in everything she does. Not just in her writing, she finds herself gravitating towards clothes of hers that he’d once touched. Like her old The Stone Roses shirt he wore once, or the flannel shirt he’d always ‘borrow’ when he came into her room. She buys his favourite brand of tea bags and stocks the fridge with his favourite pop. She listens to his favourite artist and hums a few tones lower to match his usual pitch. She reads books he had recommended and watches True Romance over and over because she can still picture his happy grin as he mimed the words along to the cinema scene. She finds herself stroking the freckle on her collarbone he once kissed. Touching the part of her hairline he would rest his lips against when he held her close. She finds herself thinking of him. Consumed by him. It’s Matty. It’s always been Matty.

She doesn’t stop writing. The words seem to flow out of her unlike anything she’s ever experienced before. Her hand cramps and even then she continues on with ink stained finger tips delicately turning white pages.

She shifts the book from her knee to the coffee table and as she does something falls out from the back of it. Shuffling awkwardly across the floor and raising the heads of the two dogs who watch her, she reaches for the small photograph.

A smile stretches her lips. It’s of the band a few weeks after she first met them. She was young at the time, thirteen maybe if she remembers correctly. Matty is standing directly behind her with his hand on her shoulder and his chin on her head. She’s smiling so big. She misses it. She misses the band. She misses her boys. She misses her Matty.

July 30th 2007

“You’ll be fine.’

Her cousin's words do little to help sooth her nerves as she clutches his hand. “They’re my best mates,” He continues on as he holds the door open for her, “They’ll love you as much as I do.”

“I’m not sure, Ads.”

“It’ll be fine.”

He promises as he opens the door. Three sets of eyes are on her when she enters and she pauses at the doorway.

It’s the tallest one with a buzzcut that comes to her first with a smile. “Caroline?”

“Tommie.” She says quickly.

“I’m Ross.” He tells her, then with a hand on her back he guides her further into the room to sit on the small two seater they have. 

Before he can settle beside her the space is taken by the long haired guy, he throws an arm over her shoulder and places the other in front of her for her to shake. “I’m Matty. Hann tells us you can play guitar, wanna be in the band?”

Ross shakes his head and pushes Matty away from her by his forehead, “She’s like ten leave her alone.”

“I’m not… ten.” She says quietly. 

Matty shrugs, ignoring her quiet comment, “Well, let her decide, Ross.” He turns back to her then, brown eyes looking right through her, “Would you?”

She shrugs, “I don’t know.”

“Leave her alone.”

The third guy who she hasn’t learnt the name of yet drags him to stand and pushes him away, Ross takes Matty’s spot while the guy in the beanie offers a shy smile. “I’m George.”

She nods back to him and lets her eyes go back to Matty who’s rocking back and forth on his feet, “I’ve always said having a girl in the band will do us better.”

“Better how?”

He sighs dramatically and Adam shoots a sharp look to George, “Really? You want him to give his whole speech again?”

George shrugs innocently as Matty clears his throat, “First of all, a girl can hit different notes than me, having one to harmonise-”

“Matty.” Ross interrupts, “The girl’s just got here. Let’s leave her alone, eh?”

He rolls his eyes then turns them back to Tommie, “Favourite song?”

She looks back to Adam, already hating her cousin for forcing her to meet his friends, “I don’t know, um.” She looks around at the walls of the little pool house they’re hidden away in. There’s posters and instruments all lying around, the floor is covered in wires and through a barely covered glass window she can see the pool. “I like that one of the new Arctic Monkey album.”

“Which one?”

“Brianstorm.”

He nods in thought, “Alright. Sit back, relax and enjoy, Thomas. We’re gonna blow you away.”

He ushers the guys up and Ross leans towards her, “This is him trying to convince you. Don’t give in, he’s pushy but he’ll give up eventually.”

Looking back, Tommie’s glad he didn’t give up.

She clutches the photo to her chest and leans back against her settee with a sob of solitude. 

With tears in her eyes she crawls across the floor to her sofa and grips her phone. With shaky hands she lifts it to her ear as the phone starts ringing. 

“Hello?”

“Can you come over? Please. I just-” She niffles and rubs the back of her wrist against her nose, “I really need you right now.”

taglist

@thereisaplaceintheheart, @indierockgirrl, @sofaritsalrightt, @julezs-bl0g, @eaglestar31, @sophinthealpss, @noacfemcel, @if-my-heart-bleeds, @befrwime, @fallingforel, @sexorchocolateorpillowsorclouds, @3terna15unshin3, @1975sophie1975, @thesocraticjunkiewannabe, @littlesoldierelleora, @procrastinatinglikeapro, @beatr2x, @byyourside28, @plantinghobbies, @sinarainbows

-let me know if you want to be added :)

[valleyof-goldenlilies]

Love and The Lack of Ass (modern!Aegon Targaryen x Reader)

Summary: Aegon expresses his feelings over your very apparent thirst for Miguel O’Hara in the most Aegon way possible: sulking. 

Warnings: Nothing of note, except for excessive thirsting over Miguel O’Hara 

Word Count: 1.6K 

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the House of The Dragon/Fire and Blood characters. All credit for the characters goes to George RR Martin and the showrunners of HOTD. The GIF above is also not mine, original credit to the creator is stated above. Go check them out! 

A/N: You guys deserve something fluffy after my last Aemond one shot 💗 also, I’m thinking of writing some HOTD one shots based off different Barbie movies. Would anyone be up for that? 

The sound of footsteps on tiles and laughter echoed throughout the otherwise silent apartment block. “Okay, I gotta admit,” Aegon said, while teetering under the weight of two Hawaiian pizza boxes, a few boxes of chicken wings and fries, and some bottles of beer they bought from the convenience store, as you fumbled for the keys in your bag. “That it was a pretty kick ass movie. Although I still prefer the other Spiderman movies.” 

You gasp, kicking open the door to your apartment, “Aegon I don’t know what your middle name is Targaryen, you take that back right now.” 

“Middle name is Sexyman, gorgeous,” Aegon winked, although he shrieked and quickly ran inside the apartment the both of you shared when you began whacking him with your bag. “This is assault, and I’m calling my lawyer!” Aegon called across his shoulder as he sat down the bags that he was carrying on your dining table. 

“Well, I’m telling your lawyer you deserved it,” you declared, crossing your arms as you gave him a vicious glare. Sunfyre, Aegon’s large goldendoodle, sniffed eagerly at the delicious smell emanating from the pizza and chicken wings, but Aegon shooed him away. “How dare you say that Tom Holland’s Spiderman movies are better than the Spiderverse movies? I ought to break up with you.” 

“Hey, I have a man crush on Jake Gyllenhaal, alright? Can you not shame me for my sexual preferences?” Aegon huffed, but he backed away squealing when you tried to jab him in the ribs. Sunfyre barked excitedly and leaped at Aegon, seeming to think it was a new game. “Woman! Now you’ve turned my dog against me too?! What kind of world is this?” 

 “A very fair one,” you said smugly, reaching to scratch Sunfyre behind the ears. “You see, even your dog is telling you you have bad taste.” 

“Hey, don’t act like you didn’t like this movie solely because of Miguel O’Hara,” Aegon protested, backing away to their bedroom for safety purposes. “Who are you to judge me for my man crush?” 

“That’s because Jake Gyllenhaal is an awful piece of trash who groomed Taylor Swift,” you huffed. “And can you blame me? Miguel O’Hara is so-” you mimed swooning from all the hotness as Aegon rolled his eyes. “Like goddamn, take one look at his strong, hulking build and tell me you don’t feel things!” you demanded. Aegon rolled his eyes again, with such strength it was a wonder they didn’t tumble to another dimension. “Sorry, love, I’m not into muscles.” 

“Well, I am,” you declared, hands on your hips. “And don’t even get me started on his asscheeks. Boy if I could-” 

“LA LA LA LA CAN’T HEAR YOU!” Aegon yelled, stuffing his fingers into his ears as he made a swift retreat to your bedroom. Sighing in relief as he shut the door to your bedroom, he quickly changed out of his leather jacket and white shirt into a white t-shirt and grey sweatpants. He caught sight of himself in the mirror and flexed, smirking at his own reflection. Damn, I’m hot, he thought to himself, turning to get a glimpse of his side angle. But his smirk faded into a frown as he examined his reflection to look at his own…well, rather flat, behind. Remembering your earlier comments about liking men with muscles, he tried flexing his arms, but they seemed quite pathetic in comparison to Miguel O’Hara’s. 

He felt annoyance beginning to rise in him, ‘Damn it, I’m Aegon Targaryen, the hottest guy in King’s Landing University! Every single guy wishes they could be me! How am I getting insecure over some 2D character?’ But then he heard you squealing from the living room while being on a phonecall, no doubt with one of your friends, “I KNOW RIGHT! Miguel is LITERALLY my dream man. I mean, take one look at those muscles and that ass and my god did you see his fangs-” 

Unable to hear anymore, Aegon flung open the door to your bedroom, dramatically stomping to your living room, and curled up on the couch, pouting as he turned on the TV. You frowned a little as you moved around your kitchen, laying out your dinner while you reheated the pizza in the oven. Your best friend, Baela, was still babbling in your ear about the Spiderverse movie, specifically about some very explicit things she would like to do to Miguel O’Hara and Spider-Gwen, but you were no longer paying attention. 

“Baela, babe, I’ve gotta go. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” You hung up, just as the oven emitted a ‘ping!’, signalling that the pizza was done. But that could wait. You made your way to your couch, catching sight of Aegon curling up on the couch, a cushion in his arms and a pout on his face as he browsed through the selections on your streaming channel. You nearly giggled at how adorable he was. Was he bothered by your earlier thirsty comments about Miguel? You knew how sensitive your boyfriend could be at times. Suddenly, a lightbulb shone in your head, and you grinned maliciously to yourself as a plan began to hatch in your brain. 

Aegon yelped when a figure leaped onto him, dropping the remote on the floor with a loud clatter. Sunfyre came up to the couch, barking excitedly, as Aegon tried kicking at his girlfriend, though in vain. “Woman! What are you doing?!” 

“Showering you with my love, of course,” you declared, as you planted loud kisses on Aegon’s face. Laughing and somewhat screaming, Aegon tried to wrestle back control so he was on top again, but you weren’t letting that happen, not on your watch. “Are you upset about my earlier comments about Miguel?” Aegon immediately stopped struggling, instead pushing his girlfriend away and scooching to the far end of the couch, resuming his despondent pouting. You wanted to let out an “awww” at how cute your boyfriend was acting, but you knew now was not the time. 

Aegon felt arms wrap around him and soft kisses on his neck, but he didn’t budge as he continued to turn his head away and pout. “Why don’t you go and find muscular Miguel instead? He would be better to cuddle with than me,” Aegon grumbled. You couldn’t help but burst out laughing at Aegon’s blatant display of jealousy. “Oh, my love, you know that it was all just talk right? You’re still the one I love most,” you teased, running a hand through his gorgeous white blonde hair. “It doesn’t really seem like it,” Aegon grouched. 

You were about to make a snarky comment, but you caught the faintest hint of hurt in his voice, and your expression softened. Aegon might seem childish, but after being his girlfriend for nearly two years, you were sensitive to his every mood change, and how insecure he could be despite his cocky, confident front. You knew Aegon had a rocky childhood and struggled with the concept of commitment and love, and his fears of you leaving him when you decided you had enough of him one day. Biting your bottom softly, you moved to embrace him, resting your head on his shoulder as you spoke sweetly, “Aegon…you know you’ll forever be the only one for me right? Even though I behave like a horny, thirsty teenager sometimes, I want you to know, I love you the way you are. And Miguel O’Hara’s muscles will never get in the way of that.” 

Aegon was quiet for a while, and you were worried that he was really hurt this time, but then he mumbled, “...even if I don’t have any asscheeks?” You laughed, tilting his head to face yours again, and your heart melted at the sight of his soulful purple eyes. “Yes, even if you don’t have any asscheeks. I’m not that fond of big butts anyway, yours is just nice.” 

Aegon brightened immediately, abruptly leaning in to kiss you. The both of you made out on your couch for a while, tangling your hands in each other’s hair and moaning quietly. You were interrupted however, by Sunfyre’s bark and him scrambling on the couch to get it on the “group cuddle”. 

“Damn, can’t a man not be cockblocked by his pooch for a moment?” Aegon grumbled as you both broke away from your kiss, grinning breathlessly at each other. Sunfyre stood on his hind paws to try and climb over you to Aegon’s lap, and you chuckled, “Apparently not. I think he’s telling us he’s hungry.” 

“Yes, for my attention,” Aegon said smugly as Sunfyre successfully managed to clamber over you and into Aegon’s lap. He scratched Sunfyre behind his ears and smiled, forgetting why he was even upset in the first place. “Looks like you’re not that unhappy anymore,” you noted with a smile. Aegon immediately tried to look pouty again, though since his heart was not in it anymore it just made him look impish instead of mournful. “Noooo that’s not true, I’m still in need of comfort. And a kiss,” he tried to move in for a kiss again, but you flicked him on the forehead. “Hey!” he cried out indignantly, but you soothed his complaints by leaning in to plant a quick peck on his cheek. “Let’s have dinner first, then you can have all the kisses you want in bed later.” Aegon grinned, and moved to shove Sunfyre off his lap, ignoring the large dog’s whine. “I’ll hold you to that, my love!” he called out as he bounded over to the kitchen to take the pizza out of the oven. 

You chuckled as you followed after him, Sunfyre begging at your feet for scraps. Screw Miguel and his muscles, who needs him when you have your own loveable little dork right here?

can someone tell me what level of thirst is considered unhealthy because i don’t think me and my friends know anymore. 

as always, let me know how you thought of this one shot in the comments and through reblogs! if you wish to be added to an aegon taglist, or any taglist for other HOTD characters, do comment down below! thank you for reading! 💗

[wordy-little-witch]

Can we know about Atlas or Buggy Seraphim idea you have. Are they smaller than S-Hawk and S-Crocodile? What are the reactions of Buggy, Crocodile, Mihawk, and everyone else?

So I actually don't have like. A STRICT idea for S-Buggy, all in all. But what I DO have is this:

• he is, indeed, smaller than the rest. My personal thought process is that while they ARE made between cybernetics, lunarian and sourced DNA, they also have to.... idek I guess like INCUBATE. So if they got the DNA for Buggy during Impel Down, growth would be a lil closer to the rest. Still notably OFF but not quite so... teeny.

If it was only after he was named a Warlord, then I can see Atlas being visibly MUCH younger than the others.

Let's say for these purposes the current seraphim are around 10~. Atlas would be, on the older end, about 7-8~. On the lower end, he could be from 2-5~.

• he's semi or nonverbal! He either prefers to or can only speak in sign. Buggy has stints where he goes semi-verbal, and he was a late talker himself, but for Atlas it's. A constant thing. Words are hard.

• his wings are disproportionally tiny compared to the others and the tips of his feathers are white-grey.

• he wears a cat ear beanie!! Loves cats!!! Loves all animals actually. Give that boy an animal encyclopedia and he's RIVETED for HOURS

• his Haki is.... very strange. His range for Observation is outright NUTS and nobody expected to have a nonverbal cyborg baby going into a sensory overload every time he tried using his Haki. ((His abilities there are currently disabled btw))

• loves music

• kind of clingy all things considered. Atlas is real hesitant about trust but once you've gotten into his I Trust You Group, he's following you like a duckling.

As for reactions -

Buggy

• this is... it's complicated, okay? He's doing his best but seeing the kid initially gives him.... so much anxiety. On the one hand, the carefully cultivated persona he's crafted is now going to inevitably implode. It's already well past salvaging as is, but smth about having the final nail in the coffin makes his chest knot up.

• is very patient and doesn't treat Atlas any differently from any of the other seraphim. That's a kid, they're ALL kids, and Buggy's a clown - making kids happy is literally in the Code.

• he will forget sometimes that not everyone knows sign language so he and Atlas will be absolutely going HAM about something and get really confused and/or offended when someone interjects or asks what they're doing.

• he absolutely calls Atlas smth like "my little mime" or "mime of mine", and it makes people melt. Carries him ((and the others as needed)) around, usually on his hip, can and will pepper faces in kisses and swing them around to get squeals and laughter.

• mama buggy supremacy need I say more /hj

Mihawk

• was certainly not expecting this. Like. At all. Hawkeye Mihawk was blindsided.

• ngl was very hesitant on having ANOTHER vulnerable party on the island, especially one so.... small. His own seraphim and Crocodile's seemed so intimidatingly tiny and then this little guy just.... proves everything wrong there. Holy fuck.

• when he realizes Altas's Haki is so sensitive, he asks Buggy what he does to cope. When he finds out Buggy always just.... locked it down, he's flabbergasted. Makes it his MISSION to research oversensitive oberservation haki. His spouse and tiniest child deserve better.

• is very good with Atlas's sensory needs and winds up also encouraging the other seraphim to be more open as well. None of these bitches are neurotypical.

• if asked, he will deny getting a little choked up when Atlas, Birdie and Angel each called him some variant of father. He did though. He absolutely did.

Crocodile

• he's too big and cool and wealthy for feelings (/j). But if he did have them, he'd be extra soft with Atlas. Angel and he click due to many reasons. He and Birdie are decently close. He and Atlas are... a little different. For one, the tiny little clown lunarian is so.... well..... tiny. And quiet. He likes small, cute, quiet things.

• he spoils all of the kids absolutely, but if anyone asks, he'll gut you. Stop. He has a reputation damn it.

• considered getting an AAC book, not only for Atlas but definitely considered heavily with the kid's presence and needs.

• was a little concerned with all the little red flags from all the kids, but ESPECIALLY from Atlas - especially because he can see the red flags now in Buggy too, now hidden under layers upon layers of masking. Reptile man is doing some math here.

• sometime the world gets a little too Much for Atlas, and Crocodile will never admit to the Emotions that come up when the kid creeps up to him, tugs on his pants leg, and signs 'hide, coat?' He let's the kid take as much time as he needs and does NOT stop to think on the ramifications of being considered a Safe Place for him ((He thinks it a lot))

BONUS REACTIONS

Angel

• the Oldest of the seraphim because he came out first so OBVIOUSLY he's the biggest and oldest. Takes his role as Big Brother VERY seriously

• weird mix of VERY protective and Cain Instinct. He'd never ever ever hurt Atlas but sometimes his baby brother is just........ so very.......... smackable.............

• learned sign in the lab a little later than the others, uses it far less, but knows most of the swears.

• complains about how ANNOYING having brothers is but if anyone else complains about his brothers, he'll throw hands.

Birdie

• still thinks he should be the oldest since he was STARTED first and only came out after Angel due to technical issues, but whatever

• still deciding on his name but is very tempted to follow Atlas's example and pick something Cool and Mythical. Is debating Avalon but isn't sure he wants to commit to the accidental A-theme they'd have going on.

• he learned sign the first after it turned out Atlas couldn't or wouldn't talk. Played it off as a useful skill to have anyway. Secretly a big softie.

• he's the type to wordlessly take Atlas's hand in a crowded area to make sure he "doesn't get lost or kidnapped", tries to play it cool but always flutters his wings that little bit more when a smaller hand holds his own just a lil tighter.

• preens the others far more, but absolutely keeps any spare feathers bc he knows Atlas likes them.

• milder Cain Instinct but he can and will bite with and without warning. Not even always aggressive either. Sometimes he just loves someone so much he just noms

• usually keeps Atlas company when he's overwhelmed and needs to decompress - he's either a cuddle buddy or a silent sentry if protection. Anyone who tries to interrupt gets stabbed

[desceros]

okay, okay, okay, so I like, I wrote down my musings and wanted to show you, the master of the au, so you, GB, and everyone can squueee and go even more insane? this isn't me fishing (heh. nice) for hints or anything, I just wanted to share my thoughts with you Des, all of these questions are rhetorical 👍

I am so curious to know how much the language barrier affects Donnie in the au. fisherman-chan knows Donnie's name, does he know theirs? is it the most beautiful name to him, or just a sound, do you even bother trying to tell him? does he lie awake during the day, trying to sleep but can't because he's desperately trying to decipher the sounds you make? He sees you trying so hard to communicate with him, patterns going round and round. Does he yearn to know you? Does he wonder about your birth story, how you feel about rain? that haunting melody you hum to yourself when you're thinking about something sad, what is it called? does he harbor this curiosity about you, the way you do about him?

I'm assuming there isn't a land equivalent to the eldritch fish/loopieness for his end, I love the concept of them both sometimes being frustrated by this! they want to understand each other so badly!! and they do, in their own way, in their own time, deeper than many will ever hope to know their true love *heart eyes* but can you imagine Lavi just casually dropping fisherman-chan lore to her dad? Like, for example, Lavi randomly asks you about YOUR family, "Momma, did you ever have a mama and papa once? Did you play games with your Papa like I do? What games did you play??" and you get so sad, obvi, and Donnie can tell but he maybe wasn't paying enough attention before, so fisherman-chan is tearing up trying to explain their family lore, and Lavi is starting to get distressed, and Donnie has to ask Lavi what's happening because he can't understand just the words alone. and he's horrified all these years he didn't know because he couldn't ask, because you couldn't tell him? it just, ah... never came up in conversation... he knew you were alone, but... it's different hearing from his child what you couldn't tell him yourself. the meat of it, ya know? the gritty details (age appropriate for Lavi, of course, but all the same).

I've got more! I can keep going! but, I think for now this ask may be long enough, don't want to *finger guns* go overboard 😅

i do so Love a good pun ✨

first i'll say that i am far from master of the au! gb is very much a co-creator, and yorshie and cleric have been doing a lot of good work with it as well. gb and i do most of it, but it wouldn't be the same without everyone's input!

as for your questions... most of them i'll leave to answer in future fics, hehe. i will say that donnie doesn't really understand english, no. the only way you two can "talk" is when your brain gets close enough to madness for you to understand him. and for names, well... it's kind of canon that fishermen don't really have names, or at least, they don't matter. to donnie, you're just you. mine. the thing that i love. gave me a pretty baby. that and rudimentary sign language. pointing. gestures. miming things. but it's largely either non-verbal or done when you're very, very close to loopy.

anywho, jazz hands!!! i'm soooo so so so so delighted you're enjoying. we're all TOTALLY NORMAL about dredge au (<- said while hiding all of the towels from where i've mopped up my profuse bleeding)

[ilivemydreamsthere]

Be mime good girl

This is second part where reader is Profesor on school of good and have real big thing for Dean of school of evil.

Warning: smut , praises ...

××××××××××

It had been nearly a week from your last meeting with Lady Lesso. You had been feeling very low. Mostly cause you felt like all of it was just your fantasy and she didn't wanted you. You weren't even dean just teacher. Teacher most of your colleagues didn't respect cause you wanted to teach heroes more then look good. Heroes should have kindness, companion, empathy ,love and be brave not just look good like sick dolls. Your class had been mostly out on air. Like one who was just now getting go it's end. 

"How this will help us to fight the evil ?" One of students speak up and you smiled. 

"Rather tell me would good exist without evil and would evil exist without good?"  Your students seems to be shocked but when you hear clapping and noticed who is leaning about nearby tree your eyes widen. Lady Lesso!

"I wouldn't not tell it better. Cause true be told we need each other," She said to your class but her eyes was pointing right at you. 

"Class dismissed!" You spoke up and wait till everyone leave and then you finally looked at her. You slowly come closer. She took your hands slowly in hers and you looked up to her eyes.  

"I love your eyes " You spoke more likely let it slip and she chuckled.  

"Oh yes?and what else ?"  You wanted to ask what happened to poor boy who interrupted you week back but when she spoke like this you shivered slightly but get on your tiptoes and whisper against her neck and ear. 

"All of you and I want it. I want you " Your own voice sounds breathless but you said it. She slowly looked at you. Your eyes meet hers and you could see something shifted in her and she did tourn you against the tree and kiss you hard on your lips and her hands cupped your face and moved to press closer you. You let out shaky moan but it get lost in kiss you shared. You did put your arms around her neck and you feel so happy that the tree is behind you and she press you to it. Cause your knees went weak from the kiss. 

You could feel the touch of her hands moving slowly down on your shoulders and arms to remind for moment on your hips and one of her hands touch your leg and you slowly put it around her waist and she seems to be getting even more excited as you. Your a bit shaky hands touch opening of her shirt.  Then your eyes meet again. 

"You are so hot " she whispered and you giggled little but then you moaned when you felt her kisses on your neck and her hand on your inner thing.

"I am not kidding " she spoke to your neck "hot heroe and just mine …." She spoke quietly and when you wanted to answer she just fight right place to rub gently and you moaned softly. For once you had been so happy that you chose a dress and not trousers like usual.  

"Your ?" 

"Hmm mine good girl " you blushed but kisses her with passion these little words flamed in you.  She smiled against your lips understanding you love these praise. You could feel her fingers moving up your inner thing and your eyes widen cause she pulled your soaked underwear aside and touched you. Real you with moan on her lips. 

"All ready for me " her voice make you shivered. Her fingers slowly circled your clit and you know this won't take so long. Not when you could say how wet you really are. 

"I …" you wanted to tell more but her skilled fingers make you close your eyes and moan for her. 

"Please "  You spoke up softly.  

"More?" You open your eyes meeting hers and nodded licking your lips and pull her for another passionate kiss and you could just gasp cause she slowly used her skilled fingers to penetrate you. Your head bumped over the tree. "Oh my goodness ' you whisper when she moved her fingers and kisses you with passion. It didn't take time to make you come like this. With her body pressing in you and her fingers deep inside you. 

You moaned and bite your lips hard to not be so aloud. She slowly picked up the moves and moved harder against yourself. You could feel being close.

"Be mine good girl and come for me ' it was all you needed.

"Next time I will make you scream " The promise stayed in the air and you shivered your body still all hot from orgasm which just approached you so easily. 

"Till next time ' she whispered kissing your neck and leave mark in there. "Be mine good girl "  

You were shivering when she make step back and your mind crosses crazy idea you took hand and fingers which was moment back deep inside you find way in your fingers and you could see how her eyes widen. 

"Bed after your last class yes?"

"Yes " you spoke up and before you could say more she just leave as she appeared. Quickly. You were sure your entire thoughts will be just about her entire class. 

[tdinyomomma]

TDI X Reader- Phobia Factor (Chapter Seven)

If you haven’t read: six

After the Killer Bass’s elimination we decided to go to the campfire and join them. Well there’s more to it but whatever. “What do you guys want? Come by to rub it in?” Courtney questions us with her hands on her hips. “We got some extra dessert after our tuck-shop party, thought you might want some.” Trent speaks for us as Beth jiggles the green jello in her hands. 

“So, what? You’re just being nice?” Courtney rebuttals.

“Okay, Owen stank up our cabin and we need some time to air it out.” Gwen rolls her eyes and Owen farts. “Ew, dude.” Trent gives the big guy a look.

Beth then brings over the green jello to the Miss C.I.T. who ends up squealing, stepping back. “No!” She then collects herself. “I mean, no thanks. I’m good.” She politely declines the offer. 

“What? Are you on a diet or something?” Duncan quizzes her. 

“No, I just don’t like green jelly, okay?” She defends herself, Beth  then goes past her and over to DJ, he gasps. “Snake!” Flipping the tray over. Cody bends over, grabbing the worm. “Chill, dude, it’s just a gummy worm.” He shows it off to the poor guy. 

“Sorry for tripping. Snakes just freak me out.” He apologizes. “I feel you, chickens give me the creeps, dude.” Tyler comforts his teammate. 

“You’re afraid of chickens?” Gwen asks in disbelief, Duncan chuckles. “Wow, that’s-that’s really lame man.” 

“So suddenly, everyone’s having this big share fest by the fire. Like Beth went on and on about her mortal fear being covered by bugs. Harold’s afraid of Ninjas. Even Heather admitted she’s afraid of sumo wrestlers.” Gwen tells the camera, growing interested in each one she tells. 

“What’s my worst fear? I guess being buried alive.” Gwen answers. 

“Walking through a minefield… in heels.” Lindsay distresses.

“Flying man. That’s some crazy stuff.” Owen speaks up, shivering.

“I would never go up in a plane. Never.” Izzy holds her hands at her chest. 

“I’m scared of hail. It’s small but deadly, dude.” Geoff expresses. 

“Being left alone in the woods.” Bridgette says and Sadie sniffs, holding a wooden plank from the dock. “Bad haircuts.” Sadie cries out. “Oh, okay, I change mine. That’s so much scarier than a minefield.” Lindsay shutters at the thought. 

“Having to diffuse a time bomb under pressure.” Cody scratches his cheek, then we all turn to Courtney. 

“I’m not really afraid of anything.” She holds her knees to her chest. “Baloney.” Duncan coughs. “Oh, really? Well, what exactly is your phobia, Mr. Know-it-all?” She questions him, his face drops instantly and he glances around. 

“Uh, Ce-Celine Dion music store-standees.” He slumps, holding his face. “Exsqueeze me? I didn’t quite get that.” Cody snickers, cupping his hand to his ear, I agree, covering my mouth as I laugh. “Dude, did you say Celine Dion music store-standees?” Trent chimes in. “Ooh, I love Celine Dion!” Lindsay excitedly admits. 

“What’s a standee?” 

“You know, that cardboard cutout thing that stands in the music store?” Trent clarifies. “Don’t say it dude.” Duncan whines, pointing to the other guy speaking, but gets ignored. “Kind of like a life-size but flat Celine.” I sit up straighter, holding onto Cody’s knee to stop myself from laughing. 

“Shut up!” He covers his ears. “What about you guys?” He directs between Trent and I. 

“Okay, well, I hate mimes. Like a lot.” Trent says, “Similar to Trent, clowns.” I boredly tell them, Courtney rolls her eyes at us. “All right Courtney. You’re afraid of something. Spit it out.” Trent orders and I nod but she sits taller. “Nope, nothing.” 

“If that’s true you would’ve jumped during our first challenge. But you didn’t.” I then bend my arms, pretending to flap my wings.” “Shut up!” She shouts at me and I laugh.

Chris whistlers as we all give him our attention. I sit between Heather and Cody. “Campers, your next challenge is a little game I like to call. “Phobia Factor.” Prepare to face your worst fears.” He announces. 

“Worse than this?” Leshawna lifts her food in disgust. “We’re in trouble.” Gwen mutters. “Now for our first victims… Heather!” A card flies into his hand and he reads off of it. “Meet us all in the theater. It’s sumo time!” She spits out her drink in shock. “Gwen you, me, the beach. A few tons of sand.” Her eyes go wide. “Wait how did they know those were your worst fears?” Lindsay asks, Gwen slaps her own forehead. “Because we told them.”

“At the campfire last night.” Trent reminds her, Beth and the blonde look at each other. He then comforts Gwen, rubbing her back as her head lays down on the table. I stare at them without realizing, my mind going blank as I go off into space. 

Immediately getting out of it once Lindsay speaks again. “Wait, they were listening to us?” 

“It’s a reality show, Einstein. They’re always listening to us.” Gwen sarcastically says.

I know I don’t like Gwen how she likes me but still being avoided and her bringing in the comfort of Trent as if I did something wrong hurts. I truly thought we were close friends…

“That’s like eavesdropping!” Lindsay pouts.

“Chef Hatchet, didn’t you have a special order for Tyler here today?” The muscular cook smirks, showing Tyler a fried chicken, the teen picks it up, he stares at it for a moment. Then he bites off the head and then an actual live chicken head pops up and Tyler screams in fear.

We go to the first thing which is for Beth, it’s a blow up pool filled with bugs DJ vomits just by looking at it. I cross my arms glancing over to Cody who was a worryful expression. For it being Beth’s worst fear she jumps right in. Coming out with worms all over her. “And Beth sets the bar way up there!” We cheer for our girl; she has a big smile planted on her face.

Lindsay and Sadie get wigs on their heads. Owen and Izzy have to go on a roughed up looking plane. Leshawna runs, screaming away from Hatchet who’s in a spider costume. 

Next is Heather standing across from a sumo wrestler. “Heather, stepped up to the plate, scoring the Gophers their second point on the board.” 

The wrestler comes running and the girl crouches down, the wrestler trips, falling off the stage. 

Next was Gwen being buried alive, Trent comforts her, giving her a walkie so they could talk. I want to jump in and also comfort the girl but again… Not my place anymore I guess. She wants something I don’t.

As we’re moving onto the next thing, Trent runs past us. “Just talk to him bro and ask him to go away!” Chris yells after him. I tense up realizing I don’t know when a clown is going to come for me. I unconsciously grip onto Cody’s arm. 

“Okay, then, we have 2 minutes before Gwen’s done. Cody, you’re up.” His eyes go up to the host after looking down to see my hands wrapped around his arm. He then looks back up to my face. “You got this.” I give him a thumbs up after letting him go. 

We follow Chris to this trash bomb. I decided to stay with the boy, maybe helping him disconnect it. “All right, Cody This garbage bomb’s going off in exactly 10 minutes. Everything you need to know to defuse it is on these schematic blueprints.” Chris lifts up a blue paper he rolled out. 

“What? No way! I can’t do this!” He exclaims, holding his head, clearly stressed out. “Then I suggest you find a safe place to hide, bro.” The host then throws the paper and I catch it before it hits the ground. “Later, dudes! Also, [Name]! Be careful.” He winks, walking away and my body freezes. 

“Wait, you’re not gonna watch?” Cody questions. “No way, that’s a live bomb, dude!” He then runs away. 

He turns to the trash bomb sighing. “You don’t have to stay, you know?” He takes the paper from my hands and I shrug. “I know but I don’t mind helping.” I smile motioning for him to pull the paper out so we can both read it. 

As we’re reading the paper he speaks up. “What makes you so scared of-” I cover his mouth quickly. “Don’t even, it’s going to manifest it.” I whisper aggressively. “They could be a killer under that mask. Or- or, a kidnapper. And for some reason people just let them go to parties and carnivals.” I rant, not realizing one was right behind me. “[Name], you might want to start running then…” 

Then that stupid clown horn squeaks in my ear and I scream, running away from Cody and the trash bomb. The thing laughs at me and I cry out in fear. “Stay away!” I take off my shoe mid run and throw it back at the clown. It stays hot on my trail and I run past the dock where Trent was soaking wet and Chris was sitting down controlling a cloud of hail following Geoff. 

I notice Heather on the porch and wave more arms around. “Heather! Please!” I wail, going up the porch and throwing her in front of me, shielding myself from the clown that giggles, squeaking the horn again. “What- Let go-” 

It stands on the bottom of the stairs. “Heather, please! Please, don’t make me let go.” I plead with her and she looks back at me, noticing the tears in my eyes. She rolls her eyes and places her hands on her hips. “What do you even want me to do?” She questions and I squeeze my eyes shut, gently holding onto her arms. “Tell it to go away.” I mumble, she then walks down the steps, taking off her sandal. “All right, go away you stupid clown. Shoo! Get away!” She slaps it with her shoe repeatedly and it sadly puts its head down, walking away. 

“Yeah! Go away!” I cheer, and then run up to Heather after I know it’s gone, embracing her tightly. “Thank you! I owe you big time!” I grin, before running off, not letting her respond to me.

 

An explosion occurs and I gasp. “Shit, Cody!” I run to the area where the explosion happened and he’s sitting on the ground covered in trash. “[Name]? Is that you?” He groans, his arms out since he can’t see and even though I’m disgusted I help him up off the ground. 

“I’m so sorry, the clown was just following me and flight or fight, response you know? Heather luckily helped me but I’m still so sorry, I should’ve done something to help.” I ramble on and he tiredly laughs. “It’s okay, I really need a show though.” He sighs, taking the banana peel off his head. We make it through the forest and as we’re walking through he goes in front of me, still groaning from the pain of the explosion.

Bridgette then hits him, screaming before running off. He grunts, falling to the floor once again. “Oh my god, are you okay?” I ask him and he just lays there for a moment. “I’m fine, just- just give me a minute.” He gives up and I laugh.

After Cody takes a shower and I wash my hands we make our way to a pen where Chris and Tyler are standing. The Gophers all made it through their challenges. 

“All right gang, we’re ninth inning. Tyler, for your challenge you need to get in this pen for three minutes with these chickens.” Chris unboxes a momma chicken with two baby chickies. “You can do it Tyler!” Bridgette shouts. “Yeah, unless you’re chicken.” Duncan taunts. Tyler ends up sitting down, cradling himself back and forth. 

“I’m not sure we’re getting anywhere on this one.” Chris says boredly.

“Tyler, this is the last challenge. Quit being such a girl!” Courtney yells at the boy. “You have to do this or we’re going to lose!” Courtney rolls her eyes. 

“Actually if you do the math you can’t possibly win.” Cody calculates then shows the calculator. “The score’s 8-3.”

“Not necessarily. We’ve got one more challenge set up.” Chris says. 

“Who? It can’t be me. But I didn’t-” Courtney goes on confused. “You didn’t have to. We’re always watching you and your reactions.” Chris reminds her. 

“I knew it. Didn’t I tell you guys, they were eavesdropping?” Lindsay angrily asks. “Oh, who cares? It’s not going to make a difference.” Courtney frowns. 

“Let’s make this interesting then. I’ll give you triple points if you can complete it.” He tells her.

We now stand in front of a huge wooden pool of green jello. “You’re afraid of jelly?” Duncan laughs. “Shut up! Only the green kind. It’s like sugary, jiggly snot!” She cries out in disgust. 

“You can face your fear and dive straight into this pool of jelly or let your team lose yet another challenge!” Courtney slumps, making her way to the ladder. “This is insane! I could seriously die doing this.” She climbs up.

“Oh this is just cruel.” Gwen says, “It’s probably warm by now! Warm green jelly. Snotty, bouncy, ugh!” She stifles. 

“You’re not going to make me quit!” Courtney yells down. “That’s it, keep climbing!” Duncan smiles.

“She’s just trying to psych you out!” Bridgette chimes in. “Like you said, Courtney! It’s okay if you can’t do it!” Duncan shouts, I yell up a chicken clucking sound just like I did in our first challenge earning a scowl in response. Once she stands up on the board she thinks about it then covers her face. “I can’t do it! I’m coming down!” She yells, her team all lower their head in disappointment as the Gophers cheer once again. 

“And there you have it! The Gophers won invincibility this week… Again!”

After everything calms down we all chill in our cabin, mostly everyone was on the boys side except me, Gwen, Heather and Lindsay. 

“I gotta go to the bathroom.” Gwen huffs, standing up, stretching out her body. “Ooh! Me too, I’ll come with!” Lindsay grins, following after the goth girl. Gwen scoffs but opens the door for the blonde and they walk out. Heather then stands up and I raise a brow at her. “Dang you have to go too?’ 

“No, I wanted to talk to you about something.” She tells me and I put my book down, giving her my attention. “What’s up, Heather?” I smile softly. “You said you owe me earlier right?” She asks and I slowly nod. 

“Well, before that, I want to apologize for my actions with the whole diary thing. And then by owing me a favor I’d like you to pretend to be my friend for a little bit.” She crosses her arms and I’m taken aback for a moment. 

“Seriously?” I lean closer to her as if I didn’t hear her correctly the first time. “Yes, just don’t expect me to be all nice with Gwen.” She says and I glance around. “What’s the point of this?” 

“Just- please?” She huffs. 

“I-I guess? Just pretending to be friends?” I furrow my brows, her face turns a light shade of pink. “Nevermind-” 

“No, no, I’m down, we can be friends.” I wink, then go back to my book.

Links to other writings

Also if you’d like to request an imagine that is separate from the story let me know!!!

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@keriaonmarz

[thethirdromana]

In honour of Doctor Who's 60th birthday, here are 60* things that I like about less popular** Doctor Who stories.

(*in multiple posts because I'm falling foul of the character limit)

(**IMDB rating of less than 7/10)

1. Susan is great in The Sensorites. She's at her absolute best in stories like this where she gets to be genuinely a bit alien and a bit weird.

2. "So," said someone at the BBC, "we're going to produce an allegory for different political systems, using insects. Choreographed by a mime artist. On a budget of about £2.50." The Web Planet might not entirely have succeeded, but my god, you have to love that they tried.

3. They introduced Jamie, the best companion, in The Highlanders! How is does this have less than a 7/10 rating, what is wrong with you people. It's Jamie.

4. I applaud the utter bonkersness of The Underwater Menace, and Patrick Troughton really gives it socks.

5. The Wheel in Space is proper 60s sci-fi: Servo-Robots, x-ray lasers, radio beams! I can practically smell Penguin mass-market paperbacks thinking about it. And with the introduction of Zoe, it completes my all-time favourite TARDIS team.

6. The Dominators contains the Quarks, who are adorable. They weren't supposed to be, but it doesn't matter.

7. Zoe is still relatively new to the TARDIS, but she has heaps to do in The Krotons. Nice having a female companion who's written as smart and capable.

8. We have entered the 70s, so with Colony in Space, we get Social Issues. Especially an Evil Mining Corporation, which are always fun.

9. More Social Issues in The Mutants, but this time they're paired with big sci-fi ideas. Ancient tablets! Strange life cycles! Love how much is going on here.

10. The Time Monster is like the Eurovision of Doctor Who. Deeply silly, but what would Doctor Who be without silliness? I'm sorry about Jo's coccyx too.

11. I love that they returned to Peladon in The Monster of Peladon, especially with the 50-year time jump. I'd like to see that kind of follow-up more often.

12. Is it not cool to love K9 any more? Well, I like my Doctor Who with a dose of silliness, and The Invisible Enemy delivered that. Every time traveller needs a robot dog.

13. The design of the Seers in Underworld is excellent, I love a brass dome.

14. Doctor Who doesn't have enough giant squidmonsters looming on the horizons. I'm glad the The Power of Kroll does something to address the deficit.

15. The Creature from the Pit gave us the line "a teaspoon and an open mind", and I appreciate it for that at least.

16. Romana wears one of her best of many splendid outfits in The Horns of Nimon.

17. I liked all the arch dialogue between the Doctor, Enlightenment and Persuasion in Four to Doomsday.

18. Heathrow airport is an underrated setting. I also appreciate how Time-Flight prominently features Concorde, making it far more 80s than they could ever have planned.

19. I don't intend this to be damning with faint praise (even though it probably sounds like it) but my favourite thing about Arc of Infinity is that we get a little jaunt through 80s Amsterdam. I do love a tram.

20. Babyfaced Martin Clunes doing his spoiled princeling thing in Snakedance is enjoyably disconcerting.

21. Terminus is tense and scary and bleak. Another one that I'd expected to be more highly rated.

22. Warriors of the Deep gives us a very solid base under siege. Silurians + Cold War is a winning combination.

23. Landing in a modern village doing a historical re-enactment in The Awakening is a witty touch.

24. I can’t say I enjoyed the idea of the Doctor’s violent moods in The Twin Dilemma, but I have to commend it as a punchy way to introduce the new regeneration.

25. The Mark of the Rani should surely get some love just for introducing the Rani: camp, delightful, iconic.

26. Herbert turning out to be HG Wells in Timelash is a lovely twist and handled well.

27. The Trial of a Time Lord is so grand and ambitious. If the show hadn't been struggling in general at this point, it would be among the all-time greats.

28. With its colour-coded gangs and faux-urban slang, Paradise Towers is gloriously of its time in a way that currently feels quite naff, but that I suspect will be fascinating to revisit in about 30 years.  

29. Delta and the Bannermen is action-packed and has one of the best titles in 80s Who.

30. Possibly the most terrifying moment in all of Doctor Who is Kane's face melting in Dragonfire. This series is nothing if it doesn't send children running for safety behind the sofa.

31. Got to love it when Who gets aggressively anti-Thatcher, and they never did it more than in The Happiness Patrol.

[lemoncrushh]

The Entertainer - Track 06 - No Concern of Yours

Summary: Set in the 70s, Sky Jones, a young woman from L.A., meets Harry Styles, an up-and-coming musician and frontman for the band Wildfire. Told in first person from Sky’s point of view, she shares her journey and what it’s like to fall for a rockstar.

STORY PAGE

Track 06 Word Count: 2.8k

The week of studio time for Harry and his band turned into two weeks, and then three. I didn’t get to see him as often as I’d hoped. He came over a couple times after a long session, but never stayed the night. As the end of the third week neared, I felt myself starting to get restless. I would lie awake at night wondering what it was I was feeling. Despite the fact that we’d slept together, Harry and I hadn’t declared what we were. We weren’t really a couple, I didn’t think. And the more I pondered over it, the more I started feeling like it was exactly what Halo said she and Mitch were. Just sex.

One evening, when both Harry and Mitch had announced they were finally finished with recording, and their debut album was now in the mixing stage, the entire band came over for a night of beer drinking and cards. I don’t even remember what game we were playing. Neither my heart nor mind were in it, and for some reason I started accusing Harry of cheating. He thought it was funny though, like I was just teasing him. He laughed and came up behind me to tickle my sides, but I quickly pushed him away with my elbows.

“Stop it. Leave me alone.”

“What’s with you?” he asked, his brows furrowed.

“Nothing!” I spat.

I heard him curse under his breath as he walked past me to the kitchen for another beer.

“Hell yeah, turn that up!” exclaimed Lee as Thin Lizzy started to play through the little radio I kept on the counter.

“Tonight there’s gonna be a jailbreak…”

Walking by, Harry turned the knob, nodding his head to the beat, his lips puckered. Then he began to mime the guitar chords as Mitch did the same. I watched him for most of the song, my stomach doing a little flip until I quickly looked away and rose from my chair to get myself a beer. Popping off the cap, I took a few swigs, leaning against the fridge. Harry’s eyes met mine and he gave me a smile.

“Searchlight on my trail Tonight’s the night all systems fail Hey you good lookin’ female Come 'ere!”

Harry beckoned me with his finger and his eyebrows raised, but I didn’t budge. Instead, I took another long drink from my beer and returned to my seat next to Halo.

“Something going on I should know about?” she whispered in my ear.

“Nope. Nothing at all.”

Harry continued to stare at me, an easy smirk on his lips. When Deacon announced he was dealing for the next game, Harry took his chair to my right, straddled it and crossed his arms.

“So when’s the tour?” inquired Halo when all the cards were dealt.

“You guys are going on tour?” I widened my eyes.

“Damn right we are,” said Lee as he high-fived Deacon.

“We’re supposed to go on the road in a few weeks,” added Mitch. “Starting in San Francisco.”

“Ooh, can I come?” Halo ran her hand up Mitch’s chest, her face close to his, practically sitting in his lap. I caught Mitch’s grin just before Lee piped up again.

“No way.”

“What?” Halo looked offended.

“No girls on the road.”

“Who says?”

“We say.”

“Oh, you do?” Halo raised a brow at Lee, then looked back at Mitch for reassurance. He looked just as perplexed.

“Tell ‘em, Harry,” said Lee.

“Um…”

I sat back, folding my arms across my chest. I had to hear this.

“Why can’t we come, Harry?” asked Halo. “We love you guys. We know you guys. We’re your biggest supporters.”

Harry nodded, but said nothing. I had to hand it to Halo for saying “we.”

“Don’t you want me to come?” she pouted to Mitch.

“Yeah,” he grinned, pushing a strand of hair from her face.

“No,” Lee repeated. “Absolutely not!”

“C’mon, mate,” Harry finally spoke. “They’re not gonna get in the way. Let ‘em come.”

Not gonna get in the way? What was I, a toddler?

“Harry,” Deacon shook his head. “Remember the agreement?”

“There’s an agreement?” I asked.

“Yeah man, did you forget about Pippa?” added Lee.

“Pippa? Who’s Pippa?” My question was addressed to Harry, but no one seemed to hear me.

“I don’t think this is the same thing.” Harry shook his head.

“Isn’t it?” Lee looked from Harry to me, then back at him.

“You don’t know what you’re fucking talking about!”

“Yeah? You think we made the no girls on the road rule for the hell of it?”

“Look mate,” said Deacon. “I’m not saying these girls are like Pippa. It’s just…we decided on the agreement for a reason. That includes all girls.”

“Who the fuck is Pippa?!” I exclaimed.

Silence fell over the entire table, and everyone stared at me like I’d just walked into the room in the middle of a secret-telling. Lee and Deacon both blinked and turned to Harry who barely looked at me.

“Nobody,” he said softly. “It’s…it’s no concern of yours.”

“Gee, thanks.”

I took a long swig of my beer as Halo continued to argue that she was going on tour (or at least to as many shows as she could), and no one was going to stop her. Lee finally gave up, I suspected because he didn’t feel like listening to Halo anymore, and declared that we should finish the card game.

I felt Harry’s eyes on me a few times, but I didn’t dare look at him. I’d already felt some sort of frustration when the evening had started. Now I was full-on perturbed.

When the game was over (I think Deacon won), I got up to go to the bathroom. I spent a long time in there, not feeling like participating in the party in the living room. I could hear them all laughing, the prior conversation completely forgotten…to all but me.

Finally deciding to call it a day, I opened the door to find Harry standing next to it.

“Hey,” he said with a grin, his hands immediately grabbing my waist and pulling me to him. “You okay?”

I blinked, lowering my gaze to his chest where I pressed my own hands. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Don’t worry ‘bout what Lee and Deacon said. You can come if you want.”

“I can?” I doubted Harry detected the sarcasm in my tone.

“Yeah, you should.”

“I should?”

“Yeah. If you want to.”

I lifted my head, trying my best to read his face while also hoping to God he could read mine.

“Oi, mate, we’re headed out!” shouted Deacon from across the room. “You coming with?”

His arms still around me, Harry acknowledged his bandmate, then looked back at me.

“Am I coming with?”

I shrugged.

“Are you coming with?”

I shrugged again.

Sighing through his nose, Harry turned to Deacon. “Staying here, mate.”

“Right. So long.”

I watched Deacon and Lee leave, Mitch of course staying with Halo, the two of them remaining at the table in their own private lovers’ chat. When the door shut, I felt Harry’s hands run up and down my back as he lowered his head to my neck. I allowed him a moment as his lips touched my skin before I pulled back.

“Sky, you want some of this?” I heard Halo ask. I looked over to see her rolling a fresh joint.

“No, you guys go ahead. I’m gonna sit this one out.”

Loosening myself from Harry’s arms, I walked to the linen closet where I retrieved a set of clean sheets and a blanket and returned to the living room.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m about to go to bed,” I replied, not looking at him. “So I’m going ahead and getting the couch ready for you.”

I tucked the sheet into the cushions with determination, then I grabbed the pillow case, snapping it in the air to make sure there were no wrinkles (as though wrinkles on a pillow case even mattered), then slid it over the pillow.

“There you go,” I said, patting the pillow on one end of the sofa and pointing at the other. “Blanket’s right there.”

When I finally lifted my head, I saw Harry standing behind the couch, a look on his face that spoke volumes. He was confused, hurt and bewildered.

“Oh…um…thanks,” he muttered.

“Welcome. Goodnight,” I nodded, then walked to my bedroom and shut the door.

I could hear light chatter and music while I changed into my pajamas. I laid down on my bed and stared into the darkness as Nazareth serenaded me.

“Love is like a flame It burns you when it’s hot…”

Oh, shut up! I thought as I threw the covers over my head.

I tossed and turned for over an hour after the music had stopped. I knew Harry was in the other room wondering what the hell had happened. No doubt he’d intended on sleeping with me. That is, if I hadn’t been such a bitch to him.

I wasn’t sure what I was so upset about. Maybe I was hurt that Harry hadn’t defended Halo and me harder. Or maybe I was hurt that he wouldn’t tell me who Pippa was, and told me it was no concern of mine. Or maybe I was just upset that I hadn’t seen him hardly at all in three weeks and I’d missed him and it got the better of me.

I kicked the covers off and sat up, turning on my lamp and making my way slowly to my bedroom door before opening it. I stood just outside, stepping closer to the couch which Harry slept on, until finally stopping next to his feet. I could tell he was awake, just looking out the sliding glass door that led to the patio. He seemed to be in deep thought until I let out a long sigh which made him turn his head.

“Harry.”

“Yeah?”

I took another deep breath and let it out.

“Come to bed.”

I couldn’t quite make out his expression since it was dark, but I assumed it was a positive one since he sat up and dropped the blanket on the floor. Then he walked up to me and grazed his hand across my cheek.

“You sure?”

I nodded slowly, raising my hand to touch his wrist.

“Tell me what I did, love,” he said softly.

“You didn’t do anything. It’s all me.”

“I don’t understand.”

I rolled my eyes, though I was sure he couldn’t really tell in the dark.

“It’s stupid. Let’s just forget it, okay?”

“Okay.”

“I’m sorry I acted the way I did tonight.”

“You’re forgiven.”

I took his hand then and turned for the bedroom. As I shut the door, Harry started to unbutton his shirt, then stopped.

“Um…do you mind?”

I shook my head and gave a gentle smile. “Not at all.”

Harry stripped down to his underwear as I climbed under the covers. Joining me, he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me to him.

“Hi,” he grinned, his hairy thigh thrown across my smooth, freshly shaved one.

“Hi.”

“I missed you.”

I paused, licking my lips. “Really?”

“Yeah.”

“Hmm.”

Harry cocked a brow. “Did you miss me?”

“I saw you a few days ago.”

“That was almost a week ago, Sky. Six days to be exact, and for maybe twenty minutes.”

“Oh, so you’re counting?”

Harry rolled his eyes. “Why are you being like this?”

“Like what?”

“Like you’re trying your best to be angry with me, but you don’t really know why.”

I sighed. “I’m sorry. You’re right.”

“I know.”

I scoffed, mostly to myself. I let my fingers travel up his arm to his shoulder, then down his chest.

“I missed you like crazy,” I whispered.

“What was that?”

“You heard me.”

Harry touched my cheek, making me lift my head. His eyes danced in the warm glow of the lamp light. He kissed me softly then and I melted.

“So how’s the album?” I asked when our lips separated. “You never told me.”

“Amazing. I’m in love with it.”

I beamed. “I can’t wait to hear it.”

“I can’t wait for you to hear it, either. I think you’ll like it. Actually, I know you will.”

“So exciting!”

Harry smiled at me, his eyes seeming to study my face.

“And I want you to come with me on the tour.”

“You do?”

Harry nodded. “Is that what you wanted to hear?”

I shifted my gaze to his necklace. “Only if you meant it,” I muttered.

“I mean it.”

“Okay,” I grinned hesitantly.

Harry’s lips met my forehead and he kissed me reassuringly.

“Oh!” he exclaimed suddenly, making me jump. “I meant to tell you…we’re signing with new management.”

“Really? What happened with Leon?”

“It’s funny, actually. We had a sit down with him because we were thinking of cutting the ties. But he surprised us by announcing he’s moving back to London with his family. So he gave us some recommendations that he’d been in touch with.”

“Well, that worked out. Who are you signing with?”

“A bloke named Irving Azoff. He-“

“Harry!”

“What?”

“Irving Azoff! He manages the Eagles!”

Harry gave me a glorious smile and a squeeze. “I love that you know that.”

“Are you kidding me? That’s…this is huge! You’ll be so…” I covered my mouth to stop myself from saying the last word. “Sorry.”

“’s okay. I’m excited, too.”

“I’m so happy for you.”

“Thanks.”

“Um…Harry?” I asked after he kissed me again.

“Yes?”

“Who is Pippa?”

I saw his neck tighten as he swallowed hard.

“She um…she was…my best friend’s girlfriend.”

“Oh.” I figured he meant Simon, but I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to know about him. “Mitch’s?”

“No,” he shook his head. “When…when I first joined the band, my best mate Simon was lead guitarist.”

“Oh.”

“He…he died last year.”

Even though Halo had already told me, it hit me harder hearing it from Harry. I touched his chest with my hand, just above his heart.

“I’m so sorry.”

Harry nodded, looking at me, but not really looking at me. His jaw was clenched and I could tell he was uncomfortable.

“We don’t have to talk about it,” I whispered.

Harry blinked slowly, focusing on my face. Then he sighed and licked his lips.

“Thanks. Maybe…some other time, yeah?”

“Of course.”

I was still curious what Pippa had to do with their no girls rule, but I was most certainly willing to let it go for the evening. I gave him a peck on the nose which made him smile.

“I have a question for you now,” he said.

“Oh God.”

“It’s a good one, don’t worry. I was thinking of it a couple days ago when I fell asleep with the radio on. I started wondering what songs you like to sleep to, or that make you relaxed.”

I smiled gently, happy that he’d thought of me, not only while he was away, but while he was listening to music.

“Well…” I began, “I don’t usually like to sleep with music on. I can’t. It’s too much of a distraction for me. I want to sing along, so I’d never get to sleep.”

“I can relate,” Harry chuckled.

“But I do have some songs I relax to.”

“Which are?”

Sucking in my lips, I pushed back the sheet and rolled off my side of the bed. Then I walked over to my turntable, turned it on, and sifted through my records. When I found what I was looking for, I put it on and let the needle fall.

“I’m being followed by a moonshadow Moonshadow, moonshadow”

“Mmmm,” I heard Harry sigh.

“Good one, huh?”

“Very.”

“And if I ever lose my mouth All my teeth, north and south Yes if I ever lose my mouth Oh if… I won’t have to talk…”

“That line always gets to me,” Harry commented.

“Me too.”

“Did it take long to find me I ask the faithful light Did it take long to find me And are you gonna stay the night…”

I sang the bridge and final chorus along with Cat Stevens, and when the record was over, I shut off my stereo and walked back around the bed.

“I like hearing you sing,” said Harry as he rolled over.

“You do?”

“Yeah, not only is it a pretty voice coming out of a pretty person…I like the joy it brings you. And that makes me happy.”

I grinned, looking into his beautiful eyes. “That’s a lovely thing to say.”

I kissed him that time, letting my tongue fill his mouth. He moaned against me, tangling his fingers in my hair. I rolled him over onto his back, but quickly separated the kiss. I heard him protest with a tiny pout as I reached over to turn off the lamp.

Songs mentioned:

Thin Lizzy - Jailbreak

Nazareth - Love Hurts

Cat Stevens - Moonshadow

Though just a single-scene chapter, this kicks off the rest of the story as well as raises some questions. Who the fuck is Pippa?! lol

[theresawritesstuff]

Prompt: The one and only time their kids do stand up is for Lenny and Midges 20th wedding anniversary in 1982.

So...this clocked in at around 5k words. I had fun 😅 Written as something that could be compliant with Guess Who's Coming to Yom Kippur but not necessary to have read the fic.

Enjoy! (It's long. Seriously. You've been warned)

"You both comfy? Having a good time?" Susie tutted uncharacteristicly.

"We're great, Susie," Lenny assured her, his arm draped contentedly across the back of Midge's chair.

"Everything is perfect," Midge agreed.

Susie nodded. "Okay good. Now do me a favor and sit tight. You aren't going to want to miss this."

"Miss what?"

Midge looked up curiously as the jazzy baseline of a familiar song began to play, announcing her youngest daughter's ascent to the stage she'd been told just happened to come with the venue. 

A hush fell over the room as the teenager cleared her throat, taking her place at the microphone. 

"You might be wondering…" she drawled with a mischievous smirk. "Who throws their parents an anniversary party then gets up on stage to make fun of them? I mean, who does that?

"Who stands in the middle of a ballroom in front of friends, family, colleagues, caterers, social acquaintances we've never heard of but Mama insisted should be invited–You know who you are–and decides to do a mediocre version of what they're known best for world wide? Who does that?"

She shrugged playfully to the crowd of guests.

"Apparently we do."

She smiled as a ripple of chuckles made its way through the room.

"Did you know about this?" Midge whispered to Lenny.

Her husband shook his head, watching their daughter work the room.

"Good evening everyone. I'm Lilah Weissman-Bruce and my siblings and I, with some assistance from Susie Meyerson and Associates, are your hosts and entertainment for the evening.

"Tonight, as you know, we are gathered to celebrate the twentieth wedding anniversary of Miriam Weissman-Bruce, AKA Mrs. Maisel to the comedy world, and her forever lover Lenny. Her words, not mine. Blechhh!"

Lilah mimed gagging over the phrase briefly before winking at her parents, subtly gauging their reactions.

"But seriously folks. My parents are so in love with each other even after all these years. And I can tell you first hand…It's as adorable as it is nauseating."

Susie barked a laugh in agreement while Midge shook her head, smiling proudly.

"I'm not saying they can't keep their hands to themselves but fair warning Mama is three–three?" She looked to her mother for confirmation on the number, then kept going, "Three glasses of champagne into the evening and just got back from a week of shows on the west coast so, you know, make sure to knock before you get your coat from coat check. Or use the bathroom. Or refresh some of the hors d'oeuvres in the walk-in fridge and I'm giving them ideas…"

The laughs grew at her daughter's deadpanned horrified realization. "Great…"

Lenny smirked, pressing a kiss to his wife's cheek.

"Please don't get randy in the walk-in. Please," Lilah begged, earning another laugh.

She took the mic from the stand so that she could move about the performance space a bit more, grinning to the crowd.

"Like I said, for those who don't know me, I'm Lilah Weissman-Bruce. Those of you that do know me probably know me as Birdie or better yet, the answer to the question 'what would happen if we left Lenny and Midge alone together for a weekend?'"

She held up an arm, waving in a jazz hand fashion.

"Ta-da! Mystery solved!"

She smiled to herself, taking in the laughs.

"Yes, I am the youngest of the Maisel-Weissman-Bruce horde. The progeny of not just one but two stand up comedians. Please take a moment to marvel at how mentally stable I am."

She held for applause, waving it off in mock modesty after a moment of reveling. "Thank you! I'm stunned too."

She shook her head, slowly pacing the stage. "In all fairness, Mama and Dad have always been very conscious about how their careers impact our family and made sure we knew growing up that we could choose whatever career paths we wanted. Just as long as it wasn't comedy."

The friends they'd made in show business over the years laughed especially hard at that punchline.

Lilah waved a playful finger. "That didn't stop other people from suggesting it though! I think I was about two or three years old the first time I remember visiting Mama on set and having a sound tech hand me a microphone out of the morbid curiosity to see what I would say.

"It was one of those big ones with the foam cover on top like the most perfect scoop of ice cream. You know the ones…"

She turned thoughtfully to the microphone currently in her grasp.

"I remember looking at it. Holding it in my hands. Feeling the weight of it. Contemplating the gift I'd been given…

"And then I put it right in my mouth."

She mimicked taking a big bite of the microphone in her hand, earning a guffaw from Ethan near the dj station.

"It did not taste like ice cream!" she informed them. "Anytime anyone came within ten feet of me with a microphone after that I just screamed NO THANK YOU and ran."

She shot out her arm to illustrate the memory, grinning at her own joke.

She let out a sigh, shrugging. "So the fact that I'm holding this now should tell you what a rare treat this is. We've managed to avoid doing any sort of stand up over the years, my siblings and I. No school talent shows, no anonymous open mic nights, no multi generational acts for fundraisers. Nothing! 

"But then this party started to come together and we started talking about ways we could make it extra special and we realized…these two are really hard to shop for. Like really hard to shop for.

"So then we decided, what the hell, just this once. For Mama and Dad. And all the people that have pestered us to do this since we were kinder…And only because Billy Joel was on tour when we called to try to book him for tonight. Man that would have been something, wouldn't it?"

She considered the microphone in her hands again.

"Although now that I've gotten over this not being ice cream, this isn't so bad…"

She smirked teasingly at her parents, breaking a little.

"No, no, I'm kidding. Promise! None of us kids are quitting our day jobs," she assured them. 

For the rest of those gathered, she added,"Granted, I just wrapped up my senior year of high school, so I'd need to get a day job first, but if I had one I would not quit it to be a stand up comedian."

Lilah leaned an arm on the mic stand to confide in her captive audience for her next bit, waiting out the laugh.

"You know, people always have asked me 'So what do you want to be when you grow up?' Weird question, honestly. What do you want to be?

"When I was really little I told everyone I wanted to be a unicorn. 

"Then as I got a little older, a little wiser, a little more understanding of how the world works I realized what a great opportunity I had…" she grinned wickedly to the crowd, "to utterly mess with people. So I started telling folks that I wanted to be a proctologist."

Lenny let out a sharp laugh, having forgotten that particular antic of years gone by until that moment. It was one she'd mainly saved for Midge's colleagues over his own.

"No one expected that from the cute little seven year old hanging out in mommy's make up chair! I always loved when I could get an old guy to ask me too. I'd be laughing for days from the looks on their faces. Weeks if they asked me when Susie was in the room!"

"You and me both, kid," Susie muttered proudly into her drink.

Lilah let out a contented sigh, growing more serious.

"I'm starting college soon though so I've had to give my career options some real serious consideration…And you know? I think I've finally decided."

She paused, drawing up the suspense.

"I think I'm gonna go with being a unicorn."

She grinned to herself, giving a little bow as the laughter erupted around her.

"Thank you so much. Now give it up for the real future Doctor Weissman-Bruce. My sister Esther!"

The applause swelled as the sisters exchanged a hug and passed off the microphone for the next set.

Esther looked around the room, exhaling her nerves. "Hi," she chuckled, shaking her head at her little sister. "Hi, I'm Esther."

Her siblings let out a loud whoop from the side of the room along with the applause of their guests.

"Thanks," she smiled, checking the note card in her hand.

"Um… You know…It's a funny thing growing up having everyone think your parents are super cool. Because they're really not.

"I mean, okay, they are," she conceded, "but also they're not.

"To everyone else out there, they're the Marvelous Mrs Maisel and the Legendary Lenny Bruce. To me, they're just my dorky parents."

She fought back a smirk at the rumble of laughter, starting to get more comfortable on stage.

"I remember when I was really little, before these two even got married, I was out somewhere with Mama, probably shopping, and this woman, this fan, came up to us for an autograph.

'Mrs Maisel! Mrs Maisel!'

"And I remember I just looked up at her like she was crazy and said 'She's Miriam Weissman now' and kept walking."

Her smile grew as she picked her mother's laugh out of the crowd.

"I didn't know what a stage name was. But I sure as hell knew Mama had changed her name back after the divorce and no one was going to undermine that on my watch."

She waved a dismissive hand at the laughs, segueing.

"But no, weird fan encounters aside, I think these two love birds did a good job raising us, giving us a semi-normal childhood. Or at least as close to normal as this family can really get.

"It was more perplexing than anything else really. The fan stuff.

"Friends would always be so starstruck by people that I knew as my parents lame work friends. Sorry to those of you that applies to. I'm sure you were very hip," she apologized, getting another laugh.

"But seriously! Think about when you were a kid and your parents got together with their friends and every adult would just awkwardly start their conversation with you with 'Wow you've gotten taller since I last saw you. How old are you now?' while trying to mask their horror as they come face to face with the passage of time and the fact that they too are growing older…"

She paused, letting the melodramatics sit for a moment.

"Now add in more gin and talks about contract negotiations and you've got every barbecue that Mike Carr has ever hosted."

Mike slapped the table, shaking his head fondly at the call out while those that knew him laughed along.

"See? Now we're on the same page," Esther beamed. "And don't get me wrong, these two are very funny individuals. I get that. But they're still my parents. Do you laugh at everything your parents say? No! Because we're not supposed to! The parent child dichotomy negates so much of what other people find hilarious.

She flipped the card in her hand, continuing.

"Everyone always assumes that every family dinner is this big laugh fest.

"And yeah sure, we joke around when we're together but it wasn't like there was a tight ten happening every night over the brisket. We still had a 'no dick jokes at the table' rule growing up. Although I guess that rule isn't usually for the parents but other than that they're surprisingly normal, I swear!"

She smiled at the uproar of laughter, deciding to pocket the cards.

"Yes, they are famously filthy comics, professionally. But our home life was it's own weird brand of wholesome. Dad still tried to help us with our homework and took us out for ice cream when we had a bad day. Mama still threw us birthday parties and did the mandatory PTA carnivals and took us shopping for school clothes.

"Speaking of which, can I have a brief moment of sympathy for my teenage self for having to go up against Mrs Maisel in arguments about what was cool in the world of fashion? I mean come on!!! The woman is so well known for her sense of style that before any of us borrow something from her closet we need to check to make sure the Smithsonian hasn't already called dibs on it."

Lenny gave Midge's shoulder an affectionate squeeze, chuckling softly.

"We've come to understand one another a little better on that front now that I'm an adult but as a kid it was like oil and water. She would always try to find us these ritzy designer clothes and I just wanted the bargain bin tie dye and the cheap earrings from the school craft show!"

Esther looked over to see her mother wincing at the memory as she laughed along with everyone.

"I know! It's amazing we both survived," she smirked. "Poor Dad had to referee so many arguments he had no strong opinions on either side of at all. And that's an achievement in and of itself really. Finding something Lenny Bruce is the neutral party on.

"Politics? Nope. Literature? No chance. Should people be allowed to put ketchup on a hotdog? You'll be hearing about it for at least half an hour! But put him in the war zone of a Weissman fashion smackdown? He's suddenly the calmest, quietest mediator there is. If wars were fought over the pros and cons of pattern mixing, we could send that man in and have world peace within the week! He certainly saved our household from going ballistic multiple times between 1970 and 1975.

"Forget all his humanitarian work, that alone should win him the Nobel Peace Prize!"

Midge reached over to pat his knee and whisper a silent Thank you, resting her head against his shoulder.

Esther continued, once the laughs and applause died down. "Tensions over my teenage fashion foibles aside, it actually has been really incredible being able to call these two my parents. They helped me believe I could achieve anything I set my mind to, with enough persistence of character. They showed me what it means to stand up for what's right, even when everyone else is sitting down. They taught me how to laugh when things don't go to plan.

"And most importantly, they taught me that love, that family will see you through any season of hardship or heartbreak... Even if you still insist on wearing the craft show earrings."

Midge shook her head, meeting her daughter's eyes across the room with love.

Esther returned the gaze in kind, placing a hand gratefully over her heart.

"Alright, Ethan, it's your turn. Get on up here and get it over with. You can finish your cake later! There's like five of them."

She smirked to herself as her brother meandered up from the dj station, swiping the plate of cake from his hand.

Ethan sighed dramatically as he took the stage, adjusting the mic stand height to his level.

"Hi. I'm Ethan. Most of you probably knew that," he began, getting his bearings. "Being the oldest, I actually remember a little bit of what it was like back when these two were first dating. Back when we still lived with my grandparents.

"I remember the day I met Lenny. It was notable even back then because Mama never brought any of her prior romantic prospects into our lives. Never invited any dates for a family dinner. Wouldn't even talk about them in front of us really. But Lenny was different.

"I remember I was nose deep in an issue of Detective Comics and Grandma Rose came over and said 'Ethan, say hello to your mother's friend Mr. Bruce'..."

Lenny covered a smirk, knowing full well where his son was going with this.

"I looked up. Saw this tall, strong jawed, dark haired fellow in a dark suit. 

"I looked back at my comic book. Back up at Mr. Bruce…

"And thought 'Holy shit! My mom is dating Batman!'"

Ethan smiled to himself, listening to the distinct laughs of those who knew the story and those who did not.

"They tried to deny it, but the more I learned about the guy, the more I was convinced this man was the caped crusader.

"No, seriously! Stay with me on this. He only worked at night," Ethan said, counting the list of evidence on his fingers. "He always wore black suits. Sometimes he had those dark circles like he'd been up all night, fighting for truth and justice.

"I actually caught him on our fire escape one morning changing his clothes. Clearly solid proof–I could only assume he'd already stashed his costume. Heroes do that sort of thing, you know. Totally plausible. No other reason he would have been out there, just outside Mama's room at seven AM. Clearly this was the crime fighter I'd been reading about."

He let out a sigh, shaking his head. "Oh to be five again…

Lenny covered his face with his hand, fighting back a laugh, shrugging sheepishly.

"Then there was the whole name thing! Mr. Bruce. Master Bruce. Grandpa Abe had told me about how sometimes they change people's names in the media to protect someone's identity. Their secret identity. I had a solid case!

"Mom's new boyfriend is Batman. Sweet. Can't wait to tell my friends.

"But then I started wondering… Is my mother a former supervillain? 

"I mean, Batman is always going up against folks like the Joker, the Riddler… Mama goes out late all the time, doesn't talk about what she's doing and people keep calling her the Comedienne. 

"Plus! I overheard my grandparents saying Mama got arrested again.

"My mother. Arrested. For crime!

"It was a distressing revelation. But then I remembered…Batman doesn't hang out with Bad Guys. Clearly the power of love had brought my mother back to the light. She couldn't be a villain. Not anymore at least. And that was good enough for me. If she hit up a bank or two and got away with it, yeah, okay, I can get over that. More toys for us and maybe she might stop yelling at the milkman.

"And if she wasn't a supervillain…that meant she must be Robin!

"I still don't know where they hid the batmobile but I'm gonna find it one of these days. There's only so many places you can park a car in Manhattan."

He cleared his throat, looking at his feet as he gathered his thoughts.

"I know now that back then a lot of people didn't see Lenny quite so heroically. But I always have. In more than just the way that most kids see their dads as heroes. Because he really was out there standing up for truth. For justice. Not in the nice, tidy, easily palatable way everyone liked to read about in the newsprints, but out of a genuine, heroic belief that we could do better as a nation. As individuals.

"And even more importantly to me, he made Mom smile again. Really smile after God knows how long. Nothing could be more heroic than that."

Midge reached over, taking Lenny's hand.

"I think these two have saved each other quite a bit over the years they've been together. They're the real dynamic duo, if you ask me. And I couldn't be prouder to call them my parents.

"Happy Anniversary you two."

He took a deep breath as applause filled the room, working through the swell of emotions in his chest.

"Okay! I'm gonna go circle the block one more time just to make sure today wasn't the day they brought the batmobile out of storage. In the meantime, give it up for my sister Kitty!

Kitty took the stage, patting Ethan on the shoulder as she passed him on the steps.

"Fuck, Ethan, you weren't supposed to make us cry. Jesus…" she admonished, wiping at her eyes. "That was my plan!"

She grinned at the chuckle from the equally emotional crowd.

"Hi, I'm Kitty. I'm the closer for the evening. Hey let's give these two another hand, am I right? Twenty years!"

She shook her head, exhaling as she collected herself, moving the mic stand back down.

"I remember when Dad first told my grandma that he was moving back to New York with me, she thought he was nuts. 

"He hadn't really done the whole single dad thing on his own before. The obscenity laws were still their own levels of obscene. The lawyers didn't come cheap. He was still in his first year of getting clean. It meant moving me across the country, building a whole new life.

"It was a lot.

"But I was all in on the idea. I couldn't wait. I was so ready to be a Weissman! 

"He hadn't even proposed yet but I knew he was going to. I just knew it. And not just because I really, really, really wanted him to so I could play dress up in Mom's closet anytime I wanted. Back before we had to fight the Smithsonian for some of the good stuff."

She winked at her parents, fiddling with the mic chord.

"No…You could tell just looking at the two of them that they were meant to be together. Or at least I could.

"I remember it was like this light had turned on inside them anytime they got together. They just radiated this…magic. They still do. I hope that makes sense. I've never been fully able to put it into words…Which is why I brought slides!"

Those that knew her as the family shutterbug murmured a mix of chuckles and good natured groans.

"Oh come on now! You're gonna love this," Kitty teased.

She pulled up the first slide, a snapshot of a much younger version of her parents in a midtown club, chatting over drinks, the energy between them clearly flirtatious.

"I did a little digging for this set," she admitted. "Being that this is an anniversary party, it felt appropriate to build a sort of visual history of their love story. So let's start here. In 1959. 

"I found this in a collection by an old club photographer who worked at one of the spots Dad had played around that time. Now I think we can all agree these two look pretty smitten."

She held up a finger, grinning in amusement. "One small hiccup though…"

Midge ducked her head while Lenny smirked impishly, recognizing the night it was from.

"Dad was not Mom's date that particular evening in 1959. He was the entertainment."

She clicked to the next slide, revealing a shot of her father performing on stage with Midge visible in the audience, watching enraptured.

"This handsome stretch next to her, however, was her date. Poor guy…I grilled Susie for the details because I was desperately curious. She said this guy was a doctor! Like top of his field, owns a brownstone and a Picasso kind of doctor. Not bad, Mom.

"Didn't stand a chance though, did he? Not with Lenny 'steal your girl' Bruce smoldering at her from behind the microphone."

She clicked back to the previous slide. "I mean look at this! You knew she was on a date, mister! Shameless."

She tutted in faux exasperation, rolling her eyes. 

"Like I said. Meant to be together. It's pretty obvious looking back, isn't it?

"And it wasn't just Mom looking for a better date."

She clicked a few slides forward, revealing another club shot, this time of Midge and Susie looking positively miserable.

"I'm pretty sure this was New Year's, 1961. Rough night, from the looks of it."

She clicked to the next slide, a snapshot from the same night, possibly taken only minutes after, with Midge smiling brightly in Lenny's embrace.

"That is until Dad pulled a sneak attack and surprised her by flying back early. See what I mean? Magic! Look at those faces!"

"We were pretty cute," Lenny murmured.

"Were?" his wife teased, earning a smirk.

Kitty leaned on the mic stand, addressing the room.

"I gotta tell you, I owe some of you here the nicest gift baskets for capturing these next moments way back when and for sharing these with me over the last few months on the sly. But until I get around to it…"

She clicked to the next slide, revealing a shot of the pair lounging, mid conversation on the stage of an empty Carnegie Hall.

"After Dad's famous midnight show at Carnegie, graciously provided by Alan! Not much of a runner but he was quick with a shutter. I'd say the bail money was worth it."

Lenny barked a laugh at one of his oldest friend's expense.

Kitty grinned cheekily at her adoptive uncle in the crowd, moving on.

"Skating outside 30 Rock. Ethan, Esther, and I were there too. Also my first memory of snow! Thank you, Mike, for pulling this gem from the archives. 

"A quick aside, I believe that's Gordon drunk off his ass on the ice in the background there. Who let you out there without skates, man?"

She clicked to the next, an image of Midge and Lenny standing cozily together, hand in hand outside a familiar Chinese restaurant.

"We could never figure out why exactly they liked this place so much, but thank you Imogene for capturing their go to anniversary spot. Even when they definitely could afford somewhere more upscale."

She clicked over to a shot of Midge and Lenny laughing on the front steps of the Weissman family bungalow, eating ice cream straight out of a multi-gallon tub from the Steiner soda shoppe.

"Oh I love this one! Here's Mom and Dad on our first trip to the Catskills just before they got engaged. And right after they got temporarily banned from the soda shoppe."

"I thought we paid for that," Lenny wondered to Midge.

"We did eventually."

Kitty clicked to the next slide.

"Their first dance at their wedding. I don't have a joke for that one, I just like it."

The next image to come up behind her was one of a hospital room, her parents both asleep, Midge half upright with a newborn in her arms.

"Oh here's when Birdie was born! So in love," Kitty cooed. "And so so so tired."

She laughed to herself, glancing up at the picture before turning back to the crowd.

"For those of you who are curious, no Dad was not the one responsible for the nickname. That one we can blame on our brother. When Grandma brought us to visit Ethan heard her cry for the first time and thought there was a wild bird stuck in the hospital. So not Dad's fault.

"Although he picked it up and ran with it pretty quickly, come to think of it. Dad I gotta ask... Kitty, Birdie…Did you really just want a pet? Is that what it was?"

Lenny let out a laugh, shaking his head at the call out.

"No, we know you love us, we've established this," Kitty assured him quickly, "but come on man! If we'd had a little brother what would you have called him? Fish?"

Kitty smiled at her parents, enjoying herself as she clicked to the next image.

"Moving on to 1964 with possibly the most colorful ensemble Dad has ever worn in his life…" She revealed a shot of both parents in near screen ready duplicates of the Jolly Holiday ensembles from Mary Poppins, all four kids completing the look with matching penguin costumes.

"Our first group Halloween costumes as a family! He looks good right? The blue bowtie is my favorite, honestly. Dick what do you think? I think he looks great."

Kitty grinned at the memory.

"We got so much candy that year. Grandma Shirley made those penguin costumes for us and put pockets all along theinside so we could use those when our bags got too full. Genius really. Until they got too heavy and then we really did have to waddle home."

She let out a sigh, segueing.

"In addition to actively creating some of the more notable moments of our pop culture, these two have also been caught canoodling during some of the more significant moments in our nation's history over the past two decades."

She brought up an image of the pair in a lip lock backstage.

"Here they are making out backstage at Ed Sullivan while the Beatles made their US debut."

"They were playing our song." Midge shrugged unapologetically.

Kitty pulled up an image of another kiss, this one of her parents hanging out of the window of the Steiner bungalow, holding a pair of makeshift rabbit ears under a full moon.

"And during the Moon landing."

The next image contained a celebratory kiss over a newspaper headline.

"And when Nixon resigned," Kitty smirked.

She pulled up another slide, this one of the pair outside 30 Rock in the mid-seventies.

"Here they are outside after one of the first episodes at SNL. The night we met Gilda!"

She beamed, hand over her heart as she looked out at their friend in the crowd.

She pulled up the final slide, her father kissing Midge's hair as they watched proudly from the bleachers.

"And at Birdie's graduation just last month."

She grinned over at her little sister with a shrug. "That last one might not seem significant to the rest of America but to us, to Mom and Dad, it was a big moment. Their youngest child graduating. And soon… they will be empty nesters…How will they pass the time?"

She took a bow as their guests applauded, blowing a kiss to her parents.

"Thank you so much. Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad. I hope you thoroughly enjoyed our act because we're never doing it again. Now let's eat the rest of that cake!"

[glass-needles-and-futurisms]

I keep thinking back to Muse playing Survival at the closing ceremonies of the 2012 London Olympics, and I keep saying that one of these days I'm just gonna spew all my feelings about how it's not just one of my all-time favorite Muse moments, but also a hilarious, if perhaps unintentional, moment of social commentary.

I still remember our postgrad professor showing those same closing ceremonies in class, explaining the not-so-subtle propagandistic purpose the entire spectacle served on the global stage. (For those who don't know, the 2012 Olympics closing ceremonies were essentially a three-hour star-studded tribute to UK music and pop culture.)

Picture this: you just sat through about two hours of the UK's various national exports - One Direction, the Spice Girls, the Pet Shop Boys, George Michael, Ed Sheeran, Annie Lennox, erm, Russell Brand. You've just seen live performances of Bohemian Rhapsody, Imagine, Wonderwall, and Always Look on the Bright Side of Life, alongside tributes to David Bowie and Freddie Mercury. And you still have Queen, Take That and The Who to go after this.

Interestingly, that class glossed over what an afterthought the Muse performance felt like by comparison. You could argue a lot of extenuating circumstances: the controversial reception of Survival as the official London Olympics theme song, the infamous NBC debacle where it inadvertently got cut from the US broadcast of the ceremonies, or the simple fact that this far into the festivities, a fairly straightforward stage performance* by a band with slightly less name recognition than Coldplay was pretty underwhelming.

* Not sure if this is common knowledge, but apparently this performance was mostly playback with the exception of Matt's vocals. Which also makes this an underappreciated entry in the annals of Muse miming shenanigans.

But something becomes very apparent once you actually reach this part of the show: Survival is fucking bananas. I'll never forget that one internet commenter calling it the world's most epic villain song that doesn't know it's a villain song. I mean, just look at the lyrics:

Life's a race / and I am gonna win

And I'll light the fuse / and I'll never lose

And I choose to survive / whatever it takes

You won't pull ahead / I'll keep up the pace

And I'll reveal my strength / to the whole human race

This is how the song starts! You can sort of see the logic behind making it the Olympics theme song. And then it gets weirder from there:

Yes, I am prepared / to stay alive

I won't forgive / the vengeance is mine

And I won't give in / because I choose to thrive

Yeah, I'm gonna wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin

Good grief. No wonder it's called "Survival". The song makes slightly more sense in the thematic context of The 2nd Law, the album it was released on. But on its own it's just.... yeah.

And this performance ramps up the insanity even more by just taking the piss. Between Matt Bellamy peacocking in a sparkly suit and Union Jack t-shirt, the batshit guitar solo, the pyro, the backing choir, and the fact that everything onstage (including the grand piano) is pretty much just for show (and wobbling like mad), Survival feels cheesy and irreverent in a way that makes you suddenly hyper-conscious of how tightly orchestrated everything else you just saw (including the Monty Python and Mr. Bean stuff) was. Remember that this was all broadcast to an international audience of millions.

Pairing the sheer pageantry of the ceremonies thus far with the actual lyrics of Survival kinda puts everything in an uncomfortable new light. Then it dawns on you that you pretty much just watched an accidental three-hour love letter to British imperialism. (Okay maybe that's overselling it a bit but it's still pretty funny.)

[theharddeck]

Sana!

⭐️⭐️⭐️

I would love absolutely any crumb you wanted to share about Jake and his FWB babe! If there’s a tidbit from start the new year right/kind might, sorta like, love you a little bit/ can’t unfeel that that you’ve been wanting to talk about, I’m here for it! (Or all 3 🤭)

ummmmmmmmm absolUTELY I CAN; under the cut because nsfw (also tw: breeding/pregnancy)

send me a ⭐ for director’s commentary on a fic of mine

alright jumping right into the countdown in kinda might, sorta like, love you a little bit...

“These tits,” Jake leaned forward, his shoulders pressing your thighs flat against the bed and his mouth closing over your breast, messily kissing you, “they’ll be fucking swollen, won’t they, as you get ready to nurse our child.”

I love this here, the use of "our" child. this is where it's so obvious it's not just about the kink, or getting off on the idea of finishing inside, like mans is actively planning a future with reader. he's thinking of the baby, not just the current act; i could faint. like yes, this is tittie appreciation, but jake is such a romantic, despite his best efforts.

“So soft, swollen, and all full of milk,” Jake mumbled, switching to the other breast. “And when you’re aching and sensitive, I’ll be there for you—bet you’ll taste so sweet like that, won’t you, darlin’.” The thought of nursing Jake was stunning, and you moaned when you realized he was sucking at you, nipping and miming milking your breasts.

as someone who is truly, deeply, terrified by what pregnancy does to the body, writing this awoke something in me. I love how gone jake is in the fantasy, and even though it's reader POV, you can tell he's imagining it. he's picturing the changes to her body and LOVING it and i'm obsessed with that. too many guys like the idea of children, but get bored/grossed out/tired of pregnancy, and i know jake is the one who not only is doting on his wife and not letting her lift a finger during her pregnancy, he also finds the changes in her body to be SO hot.

“Three,” you cried. “That’s it, sweetheart, because I do need to feel you, need to fill you, pump till you’re full of me and see me dripping out of my pretty cunt. Christ, you feel so good, you’re so good, how are you—”

i don't think anyone caught it, but earlier in the fic, Jake's giving her a hard time for when she says 'need'...and here he is, just tossing it out. i think he does need her, and in the same way that reader latches onto him calling himself hers (because she already thinks of herself as his), he always notices when she says needs (because he knows he also desperately, intrinsically needs her). i love how he just admits it too, just throwing it out there and practically begging her to hear him affirm her need, her want.

I'm also such a slut for possessive framing of a partner's body parts, like Jake calling reader's cunt his will always destroy me.

“Yeah,” he said, turning his head to press a kiss to your temple, “but then we would’ve never discovered you had a breeding kink.” Your jaw dropped and you pulled back, sputtering. “Excuse me—”  “I know, I know,” Jake shook his head, grinning, incorrigible. “But admit it: you loved it.” You snapped your mouth shut, trapping the response that threatened to bubble out, words you hadn’t dared think, much less speak, before this moment. Jake looked at you, at your pressed-together lips and eyes that always said too much, and his smile softened.  “I know,” he said again, quietly, and he kissed you gently. Jake’s arms were tight around you and you leaned into him, letting it—whose kink it was, what you loved, what he knew—all go, knowing there was nowhere else you’d rather be.

is it obvious that reader almost says "i love you" in response to "you loved it"? that was so clear in my head, and when I read it back i'm like mmmm maybe that's not conveyed. but that's what she's thinking, and that's what he knows and what he's thinking too. gosh i love an emotionally repressed couple

[eisforeidolon]

Question: So everyone has heard of a Bucket List. It's something that someday you're going to make happen.

Jared: Yeah.

Question: I've recently heard of a term called the Fuck It List. [Jared raises eyebrows] Where you're going to fuck it and do it now. [Jensen exaggeratedly reacts]

Jared: [pulls back on Jensen's shoulder] Take it easy, [?]. [slashes across his throat and mouths no] That reminds me of that story with the porn stars next door...

Question: Basically, if you have the means to do so -

Jensen: That was said with, like, aggression, too?

Jared: Yeah, I know. I'm angry, I'm scared, stay between us.

Question: If you have the means to do so, you should just do it right now because what's the point, we all have one life to live, you know. So -

Jensen: Oh, I get it. It's just the way you said it.

Jared: He liked it.

Jensen: Zip, boom, bonjour.

Jared: Bonsoir! [Jensen cracks up]

Question: So my question for the two of you, is what would your current Fuck It List item be?

Jared: Who or what? [Jensen throws up his hands] So just here and now? Okay, fine. [tries to grab at Jensen while sticking out his tongue exaggeratedly]

Jensen: [gets up and walks quickly away] I toldja I'm faster with old age.

Jared: I'm pretty, he's fast. And getting faster. So, to clarify, what is on our Fuck It List?

Question: Yes.

Jared: Jesus Christ. [audience laughs] Not Jesus Christ! [Jensen mimes crossing himself] Nec-Necrophilia is not my thing to let live.

Jared: I'm sorry?

Question: Would you like to hear mine so you could have some inspiration?

Jared: Yeah.

Jensen: Sure, let's do that. This is gonna be grrreat.

Question: I would personally like to spend time on my Dungeons & Dragons campaign and stop working as hard as I do right now.

Jensen: Wait, wait, wait. Wait. Wait. You'd rather work on your Dungeons & Dragons campaign and work less? Is that what you said? This is its problem, this is what's wrong with our society - that's, that's, you can't, that's not a -

Audience member: That takes work!

Jensen: No! No! You -

Jared: [repeating] It takes work! I believe 'em, I believe 'em. Okay, then thank you for setting the boundaries.

Jensen: Where'd all the workforce go? They're playing Dungeons & Dragons! Because of a list that rhymes with Bucket List!

Jared: You got it. That's why the government shut down.

Jensen: Yes! They're all playing D&D!

Jared: Here in DC! Fair enough, fair enough. Okay, my F It List, uhhhh... That's really tough. Good question. Uhhhh... God, I'm stumped, dude. Like, I don't - I'm stumped. I don't have a fallback, I'm thinking, my - whatever hamsters are left in my brain [makes circling motion next to his head] are furiously running -

Audience member: I can see smoke!

Jared: Space Mountain?

Question: It can be something small, it doesn't have to be this big grand thing.

Jared: Woah, why does size matter?

Question: It's how you use it, you're right, it's how you use it.

Jensen: For those of you who are new, um, I apologize.

Jared: For my friend here, he's a little slow.

Jensen: The train has derailed.

Jared: It was never on the tracks.

Jensen: It was never - it was -

Jared: Um. It's - [to questioner] do you have kids?

Question: No.

Jared: Okay. So I think it changes when you have kids. For me, I would love to travel.

Question: With them?

Jared: What's that?

Question: With them?

Jared: ...

Jensen: [gives questioner A Look] I'll repeat his question, do you have kids?

[both mime kicking something away]

Jared: Yeah, am I under oath? Am I being subpoenaed? Um, fuck no! They can travel as well somewhere! They're welcome to, just not where I am. [laughs] Uh, sure, with kids, yes. Just in case my wife watches this on YouTube, I want to travel with the kids for my wife [Jensen exaggeratedly winks] Because I love them so very much. Believe it. [laughs] Jensen?

Jensen: No!

Jared: You can't put no on your Fuck It List.

Jensen: No. No! I don't have either list. I got responsibilities!

Jared: What's on your responsibility list?

Jensen: I can't just go play D&D! [Jared laughs] I got people that - mouths to feed. My house's lights to keep on.

Question: I have two cats!

Jensen: I gotta go to work!

Jared: She has two cats!

Jensen: I got an idea, take your lists [dramatic pause] not gonna say it. Not gonna say it. Um, but you heard me.

Jared: Osmosis.

Jensen: No, I'm gonna be honest, I really - I have been asked Bucket List, I have not been asked the Fuck It List before, but I honestly don't have it. And I mean that, I'm still in the age of, like, I have responsibilities, I have things that I need to do? That I need to get done, that I want to get done in order to facilitate certain things in my life. Some of those bring me joy, and some of those are just responsibilities that I need to take care of because I'm an adult.

Jared: He doesn't know how y'all do things in Alexandria, Virginia, but he's got some shit to do.

[forrestdabeevee]

Can I have male Galarian Mr Mime headcanons, sfw and nsfw? 👉👈

Oh boy, I already didn't know much about Kantonian Mr Mine but I know even less about their Galarian form but I can try my best.

SFW

Similarly to their Kantonian counterparts Galarian Mr Mimes but unlike them they use their ice powers for this rather than their fingertips. Of course they still can do that but they enjoy using their ice powers more.

If you want a happy gmime(calling them this from now on to save my fingers) I'd strongly suggest living somewhere with constant snowfalls or icey ponds so they can skate or play with snow. Although you are getting an ice type as a partner so this should be common knowledge.

Prepare to have a room, or few, dedicated to his enjoyment of snow and ice, with sculptures decorating the room(s) or the entire house. 

Also expect for him to rarely spend the day dancing on ice then return back tired and sleep for most of the day, give him some water with ice and some ice cream and he'll be happy when he wakes up.

Another thing to have an abundance of is ice cream, from what I've seen and read most of them love neapolitan ice cream the most, they absolutely love sweet and cold foods the most. They can and will eat enough ice cream to give any human over ten freeze brains, but they aren't affected by that so don't worry, but still make sure they eat those in moderation.

One major difference I've noticed between the two mimes is that gmimes barriers are more easy to spot so if you worry about bumping into those don't worry it shouldn't unless they decide to make their barriers with their fingertips rather than the ice and snow.

Like with most ice type partners, expect to wear heavy and warm clothing 24/7 due to your partner not wanting their snow and ice to melt so no fireplace, no furnace, and no heater. 

NSFW

Depending on what your gmime recently ate, their cum will taste almost like that, it's almost like having a snow cone from what others have told me. With them letting their partner eat certain sweet foods just to experiment with how they'll taste, it's quite interesting and something I haven't noticed with other ice types yet.

Like most psychic types they may toy or tease you from a distance, if you want them to toy with you more often I highly suggest having a few toys either in the bedroom or around the house if you don't get visitors all that often.

Also like other psychic types, if you consent to it of course, they may toy with your mind a bit too. Potentially hypnotizing you and making you say or do things they want you to do. Although unlike other psychic types they usually just do this if they want food or to wake you up nude in the snow so I'd potentially recommend grabbing a spell tag to prevent this behavior.

Like I will say with other ice type partners, expect to feel cold and chilly while you're in bed with your gmime partner. And get used to the feeling of coldness in you or surrounding your groin, it does take a bit to get used to but once you do you'll start to enjoy it just as much as you would with other typed pokemon.

If your especially kinky or playful with your mate, you could suggest to him wanting to be bred within his barriers or be confined in one and used like a toy while trapped. This is especially more fun if you have more than just one partner or are open to others as being trapped in the barriers while others have access to you scratches a kinky itch I haven't seen before.

The anatomy of a gmime in bed is very similar to what I've heard from others, so for those wanting a more human-like partner I'd recommend the mimes as they are very close to what you're looking for.

If you and your gmime are in an open relationship I'd be prepared constantly for any fun your partner may try to bring in from other pokemon or humans due to how social they are and how playful they are. Of course you can always say no and they will stop but it's always fun to try and experiment with your partner for a more healthy and long term relationship.