#my writing is HEAVY on stylistic choice

[emphistic]

Écoute Chérie

A/N: grr

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When a certain someone — specifically a blond male, showed up to Sukuna’s door that next morning holding a wad of cash in his hand, Sukuna wanted nothing more than to sock him in the jaw. But he contained himself, saying, “Keep that shit for yourself. I don’t want it.”

“Oh? You backing out now, Captain?”

“. . .You’re one sick fuck, Zen’in.” He snatched the money out of the younger’s hands, before slamming his door shut.

Pride is a terrible, terrible thing, and Ryomen Sukuna was full of it.

“Oh, my God, girl! I feel like we moved on a little too quickly. Pause: He—you—you guys KISSED? Stop, don’t—don’t play with me right now. I can’t even get a guy to let me cheat off of him on a final, but you kissed someone on the FIRST date. Let me say that again, FIRST date?! As in the first EVER date you two have been on together.”

If you were counting — which you weren’t, this would have been the seventy-ninth time you giggled out loud this evening. You and Nobara were sitting — no, standing, actually, with you leaning forward with your elbows on the counter, and the brunette doing likewise. You decided — well, you were forced — to fill her in on all that happened the day before. You had just gotten off of your shift, and, obviously, were still in your uniform, but Nobara insisted you tell her anyway. She wouldn’t and “couldn’t” wait until you got back to your apartment.

“Yes, Nobs, for the hundredth time. We kissed and even added a little bit of tongue and then he walked me back to my apartment and we fucked all night.”

The look on her face was absolutely priceless, her jaw dropped to the floor and even broke through the tiles and went further beneath the surface. Just kidding; because that’s not possible, but her expression was even more funny after you said, “I’m just messing with you, girl. I have some self-worth left, believe it or not, and I wouldn’t sleep with someone after the first date.”

“Funny how you decided to deny only that part.”

“. . .”

“Don’t—don’t tell me the rest was true. Oh, my God! STOP! I was only kidding; but you—you actually added tongue? What the fuck? And, you just decided to not call me right after? Wow.” Nobara crossed her arms and stuck her nose in the air for only a few seconds before she went back to gripping your shoulders and shaking your body. “You are such a freak, my God.”

“He also walked me to my door, y’know. No need to focus on only those parts.” You tried to bring her focus onto that, because you found that part the most adorable.

Truth was, the only reason you didn’t immediately call Nobara that night was because you spent the last few hours of that night screaming into your pillow like a schoolgirl and reminiscing on all that happened.

“You know,” you started, turning to face the man behind you, “you didn’t have to walk me all the way to my door, right? I could’ve just gone by myself.” 

You had insisted and insisted to Sukuna that you would be fine, and that the other residents of the building were friendly and cordial, but Sukuna ignored every one of your pleas and walked right next to you anyway. From the parking lot, to the elevators, and down the hallway, Sukuna never left your side, and actually, was surprisingly nice company. You two talked on the way about how good or bad the food at the game was, how hot and humid it was, how annoying the older gentleman beside your seats was, you two talked plenty enough.

“I know. I wanted to.” Sukuna stopped to lean against the wall beside your apartment, crossing his arms as you pulled out your keys.

“Hey, so, I had a lot of fun today. I guess baseball isn’t as boring as I thought it was,” you laughed, scratching the back of your neck. “Thanks for inviting me.” You had tried to tell him on the car ride to your place, but you chickened out.

Sukuna snorted, “No problem; my pleasure, actually. And, I had a lot of fun, too. I think I enjoyed today more than I would if Yuuji was there instead of you. So thank you for coming.”

“Oh, please. Don’t lie; he’s literally your brother. Besides, Yuuji’s not even here to defend himself. Kinda rude, if I say so myself.”

“I’m not lying, though, really. I enjoyed today. I can’t even remember the last time I was able to leave the house for anything fun and actually, sincerely, enjoy it.” Sukuna moved his head as he spoke, as if in a way to accentuate his point. You found that completely and utterly adorable. Just the thought of you being part of making his day alone made you blush, and you looked away sheepishly.

“I’m glad you had a nice time, Sukuna. And thank you, again, for today.” You caught Sukuna by surprise — beyond surprise, actually — when you cupped his face in your hands and brought your lips to his cheek for a chaste kiss. Mwah! The sound was audible through the night. And it was the sound which replayed over and over in Sukuna’s mind as he lay completely awake for hours past midnight in bed. The only thing he dreamt of — when he eventually fell asleep, that is — was you. You.

Now that he thought of it, there were no words to describe you. No words to describe your beauty, though, ethereal did come close. No words to describe the smile which you gave him when you two passed each other on campus. No words to describe how friendly and comforting the melody of your voice sounded to him; if you were a siren, and he, a pirate, Sukuna would dive headfirst into the water. No words to describe how drunk, how dizzy, how pathetic you made Sukuna, even with mere eye contact. But, there was a word to describe Sukuna.

It’s quite simple, actually.

Sukuna was whipped. Absolutely enamored of you. But. . . Very unfortunate he only noticed now. And, it was such, such a shame that he was also full of pride.

“Okay, that’s so romantic, though! I can’t believe it. My friend is gonna get with the love of her life, and I don’t even know how to turn the stove on. Oh, my God. My friend’s getting with the love of her life. OH, MY GOD!” That was not even close to the last time you would hear Nobara say “Oh, my God” that night.

-

“You wouldn’t happen to . . . y’know . . . have plans . . . this weekend?”

You didn’t know why Sukuna kept on pausing, but you knew it was oddly suspicious.

“And if I did?”

“Then, I wouldn’t ask you to . . . help me . . . with some . . . math.”

“Sukuna, are you okay? You sound like you’re being held at gunpoint.” You crossed your arms, failing to stifle a giggle. You really couldn’t fathom why he was acting so strange. Sukuna couldn’t, either. 

Ever since the day you both went to that baseball game together, Sukuna’s been different, to say the least. And yeah, maybe after kissing someone for the first time changes your behavior towards them, but still, it was strange. 

He wasn’t as cocky when going over his daily feats at basketball practice; he wasn’t as blunt and insulting to freshmans whom you two came across while on campus; he wasn’t as teasing or sharp with his remarks as he usually was; he wasn’t as assertive and casual whilst slinging an arm ‘round your shoulder. He wasn’t him. Then again, Sukuna also didn’t know why he was acting this way.

“I’m . . . fine. I’m fine.”

“Okay. . . Anyways, I am free. So yeah, I can. My place or yours?”

“Ah, you don’t have a lot of good alcohol,” Sukuna tapped his index finger repeatedly on his chin, as if contemplating which location to use was very difficult for someone like him. “I get bored with just water. So, it’ll have to be mine. ‘Sides, I don’t think Gigi likes me that much anyway.”

You laughed. Sukuna wasn’t very keen on having you tutor him while your apparently “murderous” cat was present. Giselle, also known by her nickname ‘Gigi’, was a black-furred breed, with very sharp, untrimmed nails, which proved useful whenever Sukuna came over to hang out with you or do some other shit. Maybe it was because of how provocative Sukuna and his usual cold demeanor were. Maybe it was because of how close Sukuna got to Gigi’s owner whenever you sat down on the couch together. Maybe it was because of the fact Sukuna took your attention off of your so precious cat whenever he stepped foot into the apartment. Maybe it was because Sukuna was just Sukuna. And Gigi didn’t like that one bit.

“Alright, since you’re afraid of a mere feline, which — mind you, is less than a quarter of both your height and size.”

“Well, that feline comes from the depths of Hell. So yeah, excuse me if I prefer to stay sixty miles away from it.”

“Gigi comes from Hell, now? Pfft—she’s probably just excited to see her previous neighbor, then,” you snorted.

Sukuna gave you a side glance, hiding his growing grin. He was not about to openly admit you were even slightly funny. No, he would never give you that kind of satisfaction.

“Okay, so can you tell me what the variable ‘d’ is?” You had explained the formulas as best as you could, even taking it a step further and dumbing it down immensely. Then you left the living room to put away the dishes, leaving the pink-haired male to attempt his assignment on his own. — With some guidance here and there.

Sukuna and you had ordered Chinese, deciding to study while eating. And while your plan for energizing proved to be frustrating at first — since a certain someone didn’t know how to eat with his mouth closed, you had become used to it by the end. Your tactic? Drowning out the audible chewing noises. Eugh.

“Why don’t you come over here, and I’ll show you.” Sukuna leaned his head on the cushions, wrapping an arm around the back of the sofa.

You scrunched up your face in reply, pausing in the middle of scrubbing food and gunk and whatever off of the porcelain plates. “Pass.

“I told you already, Sukuna. The exponential functions are the ones that slowly curve up; think of it as this: good things happen to a bad thing. Get it? Like, their lives are getting better. And, since I know you’ve already forgotten, a ‘y’ value can have as many ‘x’ values, but the ‘x’ value is . . . unambiguous, so it only has one ‘y’ value. Now, does that help?” 

“Ugh, this is such a bore. How can anyone pay attention to these types of things long enough in class to be good at it? Fuck.”

You took his consequent silence as him giving up on life and continuing to work on solving the problem in his evident misery, but oh, how wrong you were.

“S’kuna, what are you doing?” you sucked in a breath. He was so close. So close, to you. You thought it had only been two seconds, but in those two seconds, it only took Ryomen Sukuna four easy strides to end up here. — With his chest pressed almost right up against your back. Key word: almost. Yes, Ryomen Sukuna was so close, but still, so far.

“Helping you.” God, did he have to be that ambiguous all the time? He was like a walking enigma, a puzzle, a riddle, for you to solve. A mystery for which you would soon lose sleep over.

Sukuna easily grabbed several dried plates, removing them from the rack, and storing them in the cabinet above your head. His hand left lingering touches on your arm as they passed by each other. You slowly, gradually, accumulated a mountain of goosebumps.

It was infuriating.

He was so close, but not close enough.

Every time he moved to grab another plate, he would rest his hand upon your hip or on the curve of your waist. Sometimes he ran his large-scaled hands up your middle; sometimes he moved them lower, and lower. Was he trying to give you heart palpitations?

“Y’know,” he started, his voice dripping with honey, “you can keep breathing, right? What, do I smell that bad?” he snickered.

“I—what—why—what the hell are you doing?” You wanted to argue that he had no sense of personal space, which, yes, was true, but you feared he would stop whatever he was doing at the moment. And, you didn’t want that.

“I’m . . . helping . . . you.” He bent down to your level, lips brushing your ear as he spoke, and his hot breath fanning your ear. 

There it was again. That ‘pausing thing’ of his. But, this time, it was different. Earlier he was pausing as if he was unsure, but now, he was pausing just to create suspense and further rile you up. He clearly knew what he was doing; he knew what he was doing to you. Poor ol’ you, who just innocently wanted to wash some dishes.

You had previously wanted to turn around and properly face him in order to confront him better, but now, you didn’t dare meet his eyes. Not like you could, anyway, you were stuck between the counter and him. Your eyelashes fluttered, as your eyes darted here and there. And your palms began to sweat, you quickly wiped them on the material of your sweater, but your continued attempts were futile.

“No—no, you’re not.” You struggled to stifle your heavy breathing, and it took you quite a time to form a sentence without giving away the tight feeling in your chest.

“Yeah? Then, how could I help you, hm? Tell me,” he spoke your name firmly, like he was anticipating your breaking, and egging you on nevertheless. Then again, how could he not be? It had been days, days, since you two went to that game. Days since he felt like he was in heaven and talking to an angel. Days since he felt your lips on his. Days since he felt well. Days. And for days, he’s been restless, hungry, thirsty, empty. Hell, forget about your predicament, he was the one close to breaking.

“Tell me,” he said your name, again. “Tell me, pretty girl. Tell me.”

“. . .You can help by telling me what the fuck we’re doing right now.”

“Don’t you already know? And here, I thought it was obvious.” Sukuna bit his lip, but that didn’t help any bit in suppressing his laugh.

“What . . . are we . . . doing?” You repeated.

Sukuna was silent, for a moment, “You’re tutoring me, on math.”

“I already know that, dumbass. I mean, what are we doing?”

“You’re gonna need to be a little more specific than that.”

“Oh, my God—what are we doing? What are we? For fuck’s sake. How thick is your skull really, damn.” You finally mustered the courage to twist your body around, and though you were only met with his chest, you sighed and looked upward to meet his face.

“That’s a little harsh.”

You glowered at Sukuna.

“Okay, okay. I’ll talk,” he cleared his throat. “We’re . . . just us. I don’t know what to tell you. Sukuna and you. You and Sukuna. That’s all there is to it, right?”

For a second, you thought he was referencing what you had previously said to Nobara, but then the rational side of your brain kicked in and said, “No, there’s no way he could’ve overhead that,” and so, the surprised expression disappeared from your face as you looked down at the floor of the kitchen.

“We’re friends, yeah, that’s all there is to it. . . But friends don’t do . . . this. So we clearly, definitely, shouldn’t be doing this.”

“So, we can pretend we’re not doing this, right? There, fixed the problem.”

“And if I don’t want to pretend we’re not doing this?”

“Then don’t; we don’t have to pretend.”

“But—”

“Please,” he looked at you with such an earnest expression on his features, “don’t say that word. Not again. You’ve no idea, no idea, how much it drives me crazy when you say that word. Mad, insane, deranged. Anything but that, please, anything. We’re clearly not friends. We’re clearly not just friends. So please, don’t call whatever we have as that. I’m sick of it.”

“If we’re not friends, then, what are we?” Your voice was just above a whisper, and you couldn’t even recall when it turned out that way. 

“. . .We’re whatever you want us to be. . . What do you want us to be?”

“No, you decide, Sukuna. What do you want us to be?” You gingerly laid a palm on top of his chest.

“I decide?”

You nodded, “Whatever you want to be . . . will be.”

“I want us to be . . . us. Together. Just us. No one else; just you and me.”

“Okay. I’d like that.”

He took your hand from his chest and held it in his, as if in a way to seal his promise. “I’m glad.”

Having had a couple beers — in favor of Sukuna giving up on attempting any more math, you were a little drunk. Just a little. 

“You have a stupid, stupid face, but it’s still my favorite. It’s my favorite to stare out. It’s my favorite to kiss. It’s my favorite to rub — your skin is so soft. It’s my favorite. My favorite.” 

He let you pepper as many pecks as you wanted onto his cheek, but when you tried to give Sukuna a proper kiss on the lips, he quickly moved his face to the side so you unintentionally planted your lips on his cheek instead. 

For, he didn’t want you to freak out in the morning and think he was the type of guy to take advantage of someone while they were even a little bit tipsy.

Besides, he had just gotten you. He couldn’t lose you now, could he.

A/N: i love portraying raw emotion

[veterveter]

Happiest of birthdays to the most dearly beloved @sorrydearie !!!

I have written for the occasion, yet again ill-advisedly. For being lovely & being my friend, you get the *checks notes* angst you pitched to me. There is fluff there though, if you make it to the end. (It's like a reward.)

So it takes Andrés a month before he cracks, all because it becomes tiresome, in the end. To tell Martín a story, and repeat it, and repeat it, and repeat it. To watch their plan turn from a near-complete masterpiece to a work still in progress, to witness their greatest discoveries become undone.

[bonjas]

blf: la historia continua

having been one of the fans that was counting down the seconds until the new series started, i have a lot of thoughts on the show now that 4 episodes have aired. i've seen each one a few times now but my thoughts will still be a little scattered!

first of all, i LOVE the production quality, and the stylistic choice they took with the aesthetics of this series. it's sharp, artsy, quick, colorful, and very much giving Mode magazine vibes from Ugly Betty! the on screen graphics are a cute touch, Mila's are a little bit extra, but so is she so it's okay. i especially loved the comedic timing of the graphic from the bathroom scene (XL 😆).

for being 20 years later, everyone is FANTASTIC at getting right back into character. having witnessed other shows that were rebooted years and years later and seeing some people not being able to get back into the swing of things, the ability of this cast just really goes to show the caliber of actors they cast in the original. everyone effortlessly slid back into character, mannerisms, voice inflection, chemistry between characters, honestly i have no complaints. i know some people think don hermes wasn't tough enough on mila in his scenes with her, but do yall have grandparents that love to spoil you and let you get away with things they wouldnt let their kids get away with? i'm not surprised at all he's softer with her than he would have been with betty.

so after all that, my problems with the reboot...

episodes 1&2 are bad. just straight up bad, and it's unfortunate that it took 2 out of the precious little 10 we have to find their footing. episode 1 is filled with "dramatic pauses" which honestly just feel awkward, and having come from Gaitan's never ending monologues, it felt like empty air that should have been filled. Gaitan's silences were strategic and emphasized the emotions of the scenes, and actually set up to be pregnant pauses, where this series feels like they just dont know what the character would say, and not heavy with drama like they think it comes across as.

the writing, ohh the writing...

betty's diary was always used as a tool to give us background, give us insight into what betty was feeling/thinking, and give us context or extra info we didnt see on screen. with so little episodes and so little time to explain things, HUH.....WOULDA BEEN HANDY.....

good writing shows and doesn't tell, and what these early episodes do are NEITHER. something mysterious and bad is happening at ecomoda....too bad you dont get to know! camila and betty's relationship is in tatters, betty abandoned them, camily went to ???? for five??? years!! nahhhh, dont tell us anything about it, just jump right to the resentment!??

"mystery is an intellectual process, like in a 'whodunnit'. but suspense is essentially an emotional process. you can only get suspense going by giving the audience information."-alfred hitchcock

the writers made many VERY strange choices in not telling us more about:

what armando and mario did

who exactly is marcela's dude and what he gets out of helping marcela (idfk his name)

giving us background on armando and that lawyer

giving us more background on betty and mila other than just "you abandoned us!" "she's so distant now" where tf was mila and why was she out of the country for 5 years???

why are mila and marce so close??

think back to OG blf...when things were mentioned in passing like the "horrible thing that happened to betty", those werent things that were of importance for that scene/storyline/moment, thats why they were in passing, they just added to the layers of complexity of betty, but it was gratifying when we later found out what it actually was. or think about all the important events that happened because we knew what was going on! imagine if we didnt know what armando's evil plan was, and we saw betty read The Letter and we're not told what it says, and we see betty go through all her trauma and emotions and never finding anything out until she tells armando she knows. there would be no pay off because we didnt know what was happening in the first place so we're not invested! whereas in this series they are just leaving out huge gaps of information needed to feel the anxieties the people we're watching are feeling. we finally find out what armando did during his second time as president at ecomoda in episode 4, and knowing that information from the beginning would have been so much more impactful! we'd be stressed knowing armando fucked up AGAIN, is lying to betty AGAIN, put the company in financial ruin AGAIN, then we would feel the emotion of him finally coming clean to her and telling her he's planning to take full responsibility! there's not as much pay off when learning at the exact same time as betty.

with mila and betty, yeah we can fill in the blanks with what happened to them, but without hearing betty's thoughts or seeing through her eyes how their relationship fell apart, the (majority) of the audience went straight to hating mila and resenting her for their shitty relationship. if we had context around it, the audience would understand her and how everything turned out that way.

episodes 3&4 really found their footing, the humor was back, armando's characterization and development was so nice to see! callbacks to the OG show were awesome, i DIED at sandra yelling at freddy "you're disrespecting the community!!!". i'm worried that mila is manipulating betty with their happy reunion but idk! there's not enough context/foreshadowing/knowledge of mila's character so idk that one's a wild card. but if the rest of the show continues like episode 3&4 i'll be a happy camper, because 1&2 honestly had me really worried.

i wanna know what everyone else thinks! i have tons of thoughts that i already forgot because i dont write things down in the moment lol so i'm sure i'll be back to write some more down the line maybe after a couple more episodes! (new thought i just remembered–why tf is patricia in HR, let alone working? is her old man not rich enough to support her lifestyle? if that's the case, why aren't we told this to have more background on why she's back at a place she very dramatically quit from so we can invest more feelings when she's being "bullied" for having an old husband etc? it's the little things...i dont think i'm asking too much of the writers because other shows do more and more effectively with the same exact run time as this show)

[mask-of-prime]

TLK: More Sakin

Had Sakin brainrot and had to do some sketches of my OC as a comeback after a long, climactic semester

For anyone unfamiliar, Sakin is the OC father I made for Vitani. Three things played into his creation:

One, I feel like Vitani doesn't have anything to really do with Scar, because not only does she not look much like him to me, but I feel like she'd have a complex if she were Scar's kid but not chosen by him (which is more commonly accepted by the fandom as something Nuka struggles with, so I saved that complex for him)

It's said by the director of TLK (who... hardly remembers working on the film) that Kovu was an orphan adopted by Zira, so his very own dad would have to be a completely different guy. Vitani is the spitting image of Zira and I can't see her being a littermate of Kovu and therefore another orphan unrelated to Zira because of that, so I had to make a separate father for her. (ngl as I write this I'm kinda getting jumbled ideas on how to make sense of Vitani and Kovu's parentage, I have made Chumvi and an OC named Huzuni into Kovu's parents but I'm also willing to experiment with other headcanons in the future since it's been years)

I made him solely out of wanting to make a Barbary Lion in the TLK universe, as well as to establish the headcanon that Vitani is half-Barbary Lion to explain her long fur (which is a stylistic choice I went with to distinguish Barbary Lions in TLK, yes males have long, extensive, dense manes. IRL Barbary Lionesses don't get full-on tufts or anything, but their pelt fur is generally a bit longer, though)

(also btw I thought it would be fun to make his little model sheet title some generic, stereotypical 80's heavy metal text to go with his classic metalhead design)

[johntayjinf]

Life Will Go On (YM2151 + YMZ280B)

For Sonic & Knuckles Alternate, this is the credits theme. This makes it the second time I've broken the hardware limitations of the Mega Drive for a stylistic choice.

This time I tackle the instrumentation/ musical style of the X68000 baseball game, Namachuukei 68 (生中継68).

Composed and arranged by Yuji Takenouchi, this OST is just, *chef's kiss* immaculate. I sing high praises of FM chiptune instrumentation and Namachuukei 68 is not an exception. Heavy use of detuning and instrument stacking proved to give very close sounds to actual FM synth keyboards.

The idea came to me months ago when I was working on the OST, thinking I could close out the entire game (and consecutively the S3K Alternate OSTs) in a fancily-tied knot. I intend for this to be a "true ending" theme; your typical Classic Sonic medley would be for a normal playthrough, though I'm not up for making that.

The intro was directly inspired by an incomplete project my friend shown off to me when they invited me to their band's Discord server, and I originally thought I could continue that composition for them. I eventually put this to the back of my mind but I was inspired, still.

Even then, I wasn't entirely sure in what style to tackle this in up until recently after finding out about Namachuukei 68. It was what I was comfortable with; writing slow cheesy themes like they're from the 80s-90s. The e-piano in particular did I take interest in.

The chorus melody in particular do I want to talk about, because I bet people who didn't check my Tumblr blog (that I admittedly don't usually promote or visit) wouldn't know this, but the melody was based off the title theme, which was also directly inspired by Garret Williamson's Break Out, the recent Scott the Woz outro theme, along with some Yousuke Yasui into the mix as well.

As a bonus (don't tell your mommy), I added Masato Nakamura/ Dreams Come True's Sweet Sweet Sweet for the sendoff. I thought it'd be a great reward to listen to at the end of the game.

[kingwithpaintedfingers]

As promised!! My recommendations for Warhammer 40k reading

So, rayshell22live asked me what I thought GW was doing wrong vis a vis Warhammer 40k, and I responded with a rant about Black Library instead.

Oops. (Listen, a lot of this is pent up...)

But! I promised (myself) I would list my favorite stuff I've read from Warhammer 40k. For ease of access, I have divided it into several categories.

XENOS

There are not enough stories about Xenos. And apparently a lot of them aren't good. But here are a couple I read and liked!

The Infinite and the Divine by Robert Rath: Everyone recommends this, and for good reason. Fun, sometimes lighthearted, sometimes deep, it's the story of two old robots who hate each other but are forced to work together. It's a tale of two opposing forces, the past and the future, and what they both could mean for the present of the Necron race. Come for the dinosaurs and enemies-to-friends, stay for the old man fights and pranks gone horribly wrong.

War in the Museum by Robert Rath: Basically a deleted scene from The Infinite and the Divine. A short story.

Brutal Kunnin' by Mike Brooks: Orks vs. Tech Priests. Turned out to have way more humans than I would have liked, but still fun! Includes some hell-yeah moments and very quotable lines AND includes TWO non-binary characters! Very nice. Introduces two heroes for the ages: Ufthak Blackhawk, and his squig. The best squig.

Road Rage and Where Dere's Da Warp Dere's a Way by Mike Brooks: More Ufthak shenanigans! Both short stories.

Da Gobbo's Revenge by Mike Brooks: A Grot, tired of being abused by Orks, takes up the role of the ancient Grot hero Da Red Gobbo and begins a revolution. A novella, not long but fun.

The Hand of Darkness by Gav Thorpe: A lovely audio drama about Yvraine, the last hope of the Aeldari, on a mad quest to deprive Chaos of a dangerous asset. (Or, when I want to pretend to be bitter, "Rob's Not Actually Girlfriend (Seriously, She's Just An Ally) Breaks Into Mort's Basement and Ruins the Only Piece of Art He's Ever Made" It is a fantastically emo piece of art, I can't believe I've never referenced it in a fanfic before.) It's a good audio drama, I like it!

The Child Foretold by Nicholas Kaufmann: This one. This one is so. So freaking. GOOD. I just. It's so good??? A man adopts a baby. He has no idea what he's gotten himself into. Warning, it's also from Warhammer Horror.

And, recommended by friends, though I haven't read them yet:

The Twice-Dead King by Nate Crowley: A series of novels about a Necron phaeron trying to save his dynasty. Supposed to be really good, if less humorous than The Infinite and the Divine.

Day of Ascension by Adrian Tchaikovsky. Supposed to be a really good sci-fi novel all around, it tells the tale of a genestealer uprising.

THE CIAPHAS CAIN SERIES by Sandy Mitchell

Listen, you're either going to love this series, or you're going to hate it. Most people can get over the stylistic choices (seriously, there are a lot of phrases that are repeated over and over and over and over and over again by the author), but others find those phrases grating after a while. Give the series a try (personally I think the series gets really good with the second and third books) and decide for yourself. If you like it, you're in good company, and if you don't, that's okay, you're still in good company. Personal highlights for me include The Traitor's Hand, Death or Glory, Cain's Last Stand, the audio drama Dead in the Water, and the novella Good Soldiers Never Die.

BOOKS THAT MENTION MORTARION

There is probably at least one person out there who wants to know what books I recommend for the way I write him. So I included this in its own section.

The Buried Dagger by James Swallow: my first Horus Heresy novel, and the last one before the Siege. Aka "Oh Fuck, We Forgot to Give Mortarion an Actual Personality and Now He Needs to Do Some Emotional Heavy Lifting." And let me just say, Swallow knocks it out the fucking park on this one. I cried. Then I found out he's not written like this in almost ANY other story, even ones by James Swallow, and I cried even more. Do yourself a favor, pick up the audio book, because the way Jonathon Keebler says "I know" in Interval Two is heartbreaking.

"Lantern's Light" by James Swallow: A lot of BL books have what I like to call a "companion short story" that goes with it. This is the one for Mortarion's half of The Buried Dagger. It elaborates Mort's relationship with the Emperor and why it's so bad (hint: it has nothing to do with the Emperor killing his adopted dad).

Unification by Chris Wraight: One of Mortarion's sons reflects on why he follows Mortarion into battle. A companion short story to The Lords of Silence (see below).

Mortarion Pale King of Barbarus and Verdict of the Scythe by David Annandale: While I wish they had gone more in-depth with his character, they both provide us with some intriguing details into how Mortarion wages war in the Great Crusade, and why he does it in the way he does. As well as what his brothers think of him, and how that weighs on him and his actions (a lot more than he's willing to admit).

The above are really good for Mortarion as his own character, and the tragic protagonist of his own story.

Scars, the Path of Heaven, and Warhawk by Chris Wraight: Whereas these stories are good at depicting Mortarion as his own villainous character. Most stories twist and turn Mortarion's personality to depict him as the Jungian shadow of whatever character is the protagonist of this series. Not so the Jaghatai Khan trilogy. Here he is still (mostly) recognizable as the same character as the Buried Dagger's Mortarion, but now he's a villain. Kind of. He's not the main villain of the first two books, but he kind of is for the third one? He doesn't show up often, but it's interesting when he does.

Daemonology by Chris Wraight: There's only one paragraph from his perspective, and it's the last paragraph of the story. Regardless, it provides us with a rare look at how people weaker than Mortarion who aren't on his good side see him. And it shows us that, like the witches and sorcerers he hates, Mortarion has more brains than sense.

Honorable mentions:

Grandfather's Gift by Guy Haley, because Mortarion enjoys a garden in it and it mentions how much pain Mortarion's transformation is (also, he's mostly naked for most of it, make of that what you will). Flight of the Eisenstein by James Swallow has one or two good scenes with Mortarion, but he's barely in it.

HORUS HERESY AND PRIMARCHS

Saturnine by Dan Abnett: Some people hated it, some people loved it, personally I'm in the Loved It camp? It had some memorable moments and some interesting battles! On the other hand, if you're a Fulgrim fan, skip it, it does him no favors. If you're a Perturabo fan, give it a try! He gets some great Only Sane Man moments (and a shirtless scene. That's not important, but it's there.)

Magnus the Red Master of Prospero by Graham McNeill: It's a Magnus book, but it's a fuckin' banger for Perturabo. Good stuff. Petition to have McNeill write all the Perturabo stuff? Just...not the War of Rust, please.

Lorgar Bearer of the Word by Gav Thorpe: Holy shit, did Lorgar not have a happy childhood. Depicts him very sympathetically!

Fulgrim the Palatine Phoenix by Josh Reynolds and Ferrus Manus Gorgon of Medusa by David Guymer: Both of these go on the list for having scenes that live rent-free in my head, most of them involving either Fulgrim or one of Fulgrim's sons. Josh Reynolds is a really good writer in general, though I think he might be the one who doesn't write for GW/BL anymore.

A Lesson in Darkness by Ian St. Martin: Creepy, serial killer fun starring Konrad Curze doing creepy, fucked-up Night Haunter shit. An Audio Drama.

Angron Slave of Nuceria by Ian St. Martin: a grim look at Angron's backstory, and how the suffering he experienced in his past doomed his entire legion. There's a companion short story called "Ghosts of Nuceria," but I'm saving that one for when I really, really need to cry as if the world is ending, so I haven't read it yet. I've read part of it already and man. Man.

OTHERS FROM 40K

The Lords of Silence by Chris Wraight: Generally agreed to be one of the best Chaos Space Marine novels, it follows the story of a warband of Death Guard, the titular Lords of Silence, as they wage war and have existential crises. Introspective and philosophical at times, and always careful to make everyone a well-rounded character, has mystery elements. The story is told out of order and in the present tense, so if those are dealbreakers for you, you'll have to sit them out. also includes a great scene with Mortarion okay thanks bye

The Way Out by Rachel Harrison: part of the Black Library's Warhammer Horror line, it's an audio drama that will keep you guessing until the end. Spooky and creepy and mysterious.

A couple more honorable mentions to round things out. The following all have scenes that live rent-free in my mind, all are either short stories or novels from Warhammer Horror, all take place in 40k:

The Deacon of Wounds by David Annandale; The Bookkeeper's Skull by Justin D. Hill; Imperator Gladio by Richard Strachan.

AND A FEW FROM AGE OF SIGMAR Not very many, though, because I haven't read very many...

Hallowed Knights: Plague Garden by Josh Reynolds: the only AoS novel I've ever read. Loved it. If Torgun dies, I'll fucking riot. Part of a series that may have been stopped, sadly.

The Vintage by David Annandale: a Warhammer Horror short story I hated the first time, loved the second time. Got a really killer premise, pun not intended. From that one year where Games Workshop decided that all of the Warhammer Horror Week stories would be about vampires.

Anyway, some of the stuff I enjoyed.

[heliopauseentertainments]

If you’re taking requests plz write a short fic in the style of ‘My Immortal’, but robots. Please include their oddly specific slutty goffic paint jobs. Plz make Rodimus Cron the main character K THXXX

I can't believe you made me go look at the text of My Immortal.

Only notes are: swearing and lightly implied MegaRod. Only the first bit is reminiscent of the original text. The rest is below the cut. It is entirely SFW.

---

Hi my name is Rodimus Cron and I have long black and purple armor (that’s how I got my name) with evil flames and purple decals that cover my entire chest and  bromine red optics like limpid spinel and a lot of people tell me I look like Skywarp (AN: if u don’t know who he is get da hell out of here!). I’m not related to Solus Prime but I wish I was because she’s a major fucking hottie. I’m a sparkeater but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white facial plating. I’m also a space wizard, and I captain an awesome spaceship called the Lost Light in space where I’ve been here for years (I’m 4.2 million). I’m a goth (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Bot Topic and I buy all my paints from there. For example today was I wearing a black matte base coat with matching trim around it and a shiny clear coat on my hips, purple joint accents, and black leg armor. I was wearing a black flame decal on my chest, white primer on my face, black optic trim with red undereye paint. I was walking around the ship. The ship is in space so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.

“Hey Rodimus!” shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Megatron!

--

That was it.

After several pages of faux edgy stylistic choices, unusual plot decisions, and uncomfortable semi-graphic depictions of interfacing, Minimus had seen more than enough.

He turned the datapad off and went off to locate the author. Rodimus needed to learn to not leave these sorts of personal writing out where everyone and Primus could see it. He was lucky that Minimus found it first.

What had that mech been thinking? Leaving it in the captain’s chair where it would almost certainly be seen? That was just asking for trouble.

--

"Rodimus, what is this?"

Minimus held the datapad up for the captain's inspection, doing his damned best to keep the expression on his face neutral as possible.

Creative writing was an important avenue of self-expression, of course; Minimus knew that from personal experience. He was in no position to judge Rodimus, after all. It was all part of practicing a skill and there was no shame in that.

Furthermore, indulging in fantasy from time to time was an allegedly healthy behavior for the processor. That was what his research had indicated anyway.

However, from the contents that Minimus had inadvertently borne witness to, he could only wonder, perhaps, if there were other factors at play. He had never seen anyone describe Megatron that way, with that much color and awkward eroticism. Conversations might need to be had.

Rodimus’s optics went wide when he recognized the datapad before he snatched out right out of Minimus’s outstretched hand.

“Thanks, Mims,” he said, not bothering to answer the question actually asked of him. “I must have misplaced that.”

His vocalizer sounded like it has been kicked into double-speed and pitched up.

Embarrassment. An expected reaction.

Rodimus, however, turned on his heel to march off in the other direction.

“Anyway, I need to go jump out of the airlock now. See you around, buddy.”

Minimus hurried after him.

“Isn’t that rather excessive?”

“It sure is, my guy!”

Rather than stopping, Rodimus rounded a blind corner. The heavy sound of armor colliding and Rodimus’s voice going “oof!” announcing that he had impacted a crew member in his haste.

“Oh, hey, Megs, I didn’t see you there—“

[demonslayedher]

Appreciating the KnY Noh Production: Part 2 of 3

Humans are demons, demons are humans. Weave their eternal feelings, and dance.

Or... nerds are fangirls, fangirls are nerds. Weave their eternal feelings, and screech about how good the Kimetsu no Yaiba Noh/Kyogen stage production was.

This post is going to be my play-by-play of the things I appreciated in the staging and script choices, and I'm writing it assuming you've read through Part 1, which describes more of the background of this production, and more broadly, some Noh theater basics. This review comes in two parts, for this entry I will cover the elements of the first act:

~Surprise! It's Muzan! Part 1~ Okina: Hinokami (as in Hinokami Kagura)

Waki-Noh: Sagiridoushi (featuring Sabito & Makomo)

Shura-Noh: Fujikasaneyama (featuring the Hand Demon)

Kyogen (Interlude 1): Katanakaji (featuring Haganezuka)

Katsura-Noh: Shirayuki (featuring Nezuko... and Giyuu!)~

~Surprise! It's Muzan! Part 1~

As stated in the previous post, I was totally startled by this, as I expected Hinokami Kagura right away because this Muzan part wasn't included the pamphlet. It also totally took me off-guard because he was dressed in Michael Jackson style, and although he was moving with Noh stylistic movements, the overall entrance and delivery felt like something you'd find in a Western-influenced stage production.

Mansai-san--nay, Mansai-sama gave the performances I had the most fun watching, he can do such a variety of styles. I had no idea it was the same person performing later roles, such as immediately after Muzan's brief scare of the audience and declaration that he is a perfect being.

Okina: Hinokami

Seeing as the Okina is a sort of holy dance only performed on special occasions like New Years, this was on point. From a storytelling standpoint, it also helped to introduce Hinokami Kagura right away so that the reference made in the fight with Rui would be immediately understandable to an uninitiated audience. Mansai-sama is back right away as Tanjuro, who against the backdrop of the chanters and musicians, teaches Hinokami Kagura to Tanjiro, in the shite role, played by Ohtsuki Yuuichi*. Hearing the Breaths of Hinokami Kagura set to Noh chant was very cool, especially because they incorporated the movements Gotouge illustrated.

They made no ambiguity about whether this was a fire god or a sun god, though--in addition to using the kanji for "sun," Kinoshita (the script writer) made use of many poetic references to the sun. Speaking of references, while impressing the importance of this dance to Tanjiro, Tanjuro calls it a "dance of Kagutsuchi." If sticking more strictly to the Kojiki records of Shinto mythology, this little fire god of the hearth and protection from fire accidents would be referred to as Kagutsuchi-no-Kami, and although Kinoshita kept the full kanji, he stressed that it should only be read as "Kagutsuchi," in reference to the Taisho Secret in volume 1 in which Gotouge mentioned other possible titles which would had used a reference to this god, like "Onigari Kagutsuchi" or "Sumi no Kagutsuchi" (Demon Hunter Kagutsuchi or Kagutsuchi of the Charcoal).

*Reiwa Secret: Speaking of Ohtsuki Yuuichi, Gotouge's illustration of Tanjiro for this event is based on a photo of this actor performing an Okina, and it seems Ohtsuki was thrilled with it. Like the young actors portraying Zenitsu and Inosuke, it seems he felt a heavy weight of responsibility in portraying Tanjiro (and for one scene, Nezuko). Being a shite role, that means that even when other Kyogen characters could break into simpler styles of speaking for dramatic or comedic effect, Tanjiro was played in a very serious manner for every line. It was a taken on Tanjiro we can't really get anywhere else. We feel the weight of the path of tragedy he walks and morals which structure his conduct, without the refreshing sides of Tanjiro's cheerfulness. It has an air of awe and respect for his circumstances.

Waki-Noh: Sagiridoushi

We begin this scene with Tanjiro exchanging his Hinokami Kagura prop for a Nichirin blade, and entering the hashigakari bridgeway from the stage, imply going from one world or time to another.

From the other side, Urokodaki and Giyuu enter. By the passing of a letter prop and taking turns with narration of the letter's contents, we hear Giyuu's words of introduction to Urokodaki beautifully melded into Noh style chant and delivery. Giyuu is a waki character in this production, and like the shite Tanjiro, his lines are delivered with weight and seriousness. Often he is an observer, a simple, austere presence, and one of the character who felt the most like himself. His costume was rather simple (I attempted a sketch here), but I kind of wish they'd have experimented more with brocade to tone down the colors of the haori with more elegance, like they did for Urokodaki and Nezuko.

Urokodaki, though. He was a Kyogen style character in a waki role, like an adorable old man with more freedom of expression, also played by Mansai-sama. I'll get to my favorite joke with him later, but the training was kept simple as he walked Tanjiro down the hashigakari to the far end, where the simplistic boulder prop was placed. We then were promptly introduced to Sabito and Makomo (who was kind of funny, seeing as she was clearly played by a full-grown man speaking sweetly behind a fox mask), and I don't know if the initial swordplay with Sabito beating up on Tanjiro was traditional Noh, or a modern innovation for telling this story.

In the original script, Sabito & Makomo perform a dance which explains more of the Demon Slayer Corp, including very artful references to all the known Breath styles. Frankly, this whole script is written artfully, like using the listing of the Corp ranks later on for their sound opposed as to their direct meaning in context, but I confess my ears were not attuned enough to the chant to be able to pick these things up like when I read the script later, so all these Breath references were either something I missed or they were cut out to shave down stage time.

The final face-off with Sabito on the hashigakari was very cool in how they only used a single drum with a steady tempo, and because Noh props are simple, practical, and easily moved, Sabito and Makoto immediately hid behind the boulder as the two pieces split. They then reappear from behind the rock, with fox masks to one side, but more traditional Noh masks over their faces, for a ghostly effect as they bid Tanjiro to win at the Final Selection.

Urokodaki grants Tanjiro permission to go, Tanjiro leaves from the far end of the hashigakari while Urokodaki lingers by the stage side. Tanjiro bids him to say hello to Sabito & Makomo. The script notes how when Urokodaki enters, he passes by Sabito & Makomo but does not notice them. Sabito & Makomo look at him before they exit.

Urokodaki is left there alone in the same spot on the hashigakari, remarking how those children lost their lives at the Final Selection. He lifts his hands up in the air and prays, as though ordering, that Tanjiro return safely.

Tanjiro quickly enters and announces he has returned.

Urokodaki is exaggeratedly startled. "Already!?" The audience laughs. Tanjiro is playing this extremely seriously and Urokodaki insists its impossible that a week has already passed, but ah, no matter, Tanjiro must tell him how it went! That takes us straight into...

Shura-Noh: Fujikasaneyama

In true Noh style of characters orating a story that already happened, Tanjiro tells Urokodaki about his battle with the Hand Demon. And, we get the Hand Demon on stage. He looks like this.

(Source and interview with Ohtsuki here)

Not one of the better demons in this production, I felt--initially, anyway. The actual battle was inspired by and paid homage to more traditional Noh stories about heroes, and the Breath of Water practical stage effect with ribbons on the end of the sword was very cool--a lot more grounded than the video projection effects used in the stage musical versions of KnY.

Speaking of traditional stage techniques and working with the confines of reality to guide an audience's imagination...

The Hand Demon's death was slow. Three of the six actors melted away to the back right away, with two still actors remaining behind the actor wearing the face, whose hand Tanjiro slowly and solemnly holds. The slowed pace and dimming of the lighting contrasts with the battle. Tanjiro's lines wishing for the Hand Demon to pass on are beautifully transcribed into Noh style. The moment the Hand Demon dies, the face disappears behind the two actors who just as swiftly reveal themselves as Sabito and Makomo.

And I was like, "WHOA!!!! IT'S THEM!!! THEY WERE THERE AS GHOSTS!!!!!!"

Kyogen (Interlude 1): Katanakaji

With Tanjiro nowhere in sight for this scene, Haganezuka makes himself comfortable telling us, the captive audience, about how Nichirin blades are made. Even better, after quoting some of my favorite panels of lore which are never brought up again, he pantomimes the process of sword making with some simple props, making full use of the fun onomatopoeia of Kyogen.

Putting it into the fire--ouch ouch, ooh, hot!--giving it a hit with a nice 'ten' sound, a nice 'kan' sound, cooling it down in the water, juuuuu, heating it back up--ouch, ouch!--hitting it with ton-ten-kan ton-ten-kan. in the water, juuuuu, in the fire--ouch, ouch!--ton-ten-kan, ton-ten-kan, ton-ten-kan, and he gets progressively faster as he starts complaining about the nerve of some swordsmen and how they treat their swords, ton-ten-kan-ton-ten-kan-ton-ten-kan, until eventually Haganezuka breaks the sword he's working on.

This scene was not performed by Mansai-sama, but Mansai-sama contributed a lot of jokes to it.

Katsura-Noh: Shirayuki

If I could rewatch one scene again, it would be this one.

(Source and interview with Ohtsuki here)

The challenge the scriptwriter Kinoshita faced with Nezuko as the clear shite character to use for the female-centric Katsura-Noh was that Nezuko doesn't speak. She can't tell her own story.

It's a good thing we've got Giyuu for that! He plays the waki, using lines from when he first encountered the Kamado siblings and warned Tanjiro to use his anger to get stronger and such, and it worked very well in Noh chant style. I was listening very closely to it, because prior to the performance I flipped to this part of the pamphlet was expecting a certain element.

In the original conception of this scene, Kinoshita was thinking about scenery as themes and how it is tied to the psyche of the characters--the sun in the Hinokami scene, and the moon in the Rui scene, for example. For Nezuko, he chose pure white snow.

The idea behind this scene is that she is dreaming in her box--she starts and ends the dance in the box prop at the back of the stage, while Giyuu has passed by it and sat at the corner of the stage for the waki. Nezuko is dreaming of her family, and the lyrics of "Koyama no Kousagi" (the song about the little rabbit with red eyes) are written into the script.

Her appearance is that of an innocent girl, but movements of the dance in time with the drums and flute give the impression of a demon. It was striking; the white snow is also in reference to the mind of a young girl fighting on the boundary between humanity and demonhood. Giyuu presence feels as though he is watching over her, as well as watching her.

The script for this scene ends with a striking shift from the innocence of Nezuko's dream to the reality of Nezuko's memories--red splashes of blood against the white snow.

This is the part of the script that almost made me cry as I read it, thinking back to the impact of the movements and sounds on stage.

But you wanna know why else I wanna cry??? Because when the scene ended, I was like, "what?? No!!!! Where were the Kousagi lyrics??? I was waiting for the Kousagi lyrics!!!! How did I not catch them???" and I realized upon reading more carefully later than large portions of the first draft of the script did not make it into the finalized production.

I'm so sad and I want to see this scene again, in full.

Review to be continued (and concluded) in Part 3!

[b-else-writes]

The Great CLAMP Re-Read Part 7: X/1999

Part 1 (RG Veda) | Part 2 (Man of Many Faces) | Part 3 (Tokyo Babylon) | Part 4 (Duklyon) | Part 5 (Clamp Detectives)| Part 6 (Shirahime)| Part 8 (Chunhyang) |Part 9 (Miyuki-chan)

The magnum opus that never was. Spanning 18.5 volumes, with 3 volumes unpublished, X is the most notorious of CLAMP's unfinished works, stalled for over 20 years at a cliffhanger because they and their publishers allegedly lost their taste for its too-real destructive violence and ending. Both the 1996 film adaptation and 2001 film attempt to give the story an ending, and while I'll touch on them briefly, I'm trying not to allow speculation to influence my reading.

X (subtitled as X/1999 in its original USA run) ran from 1992 to 2003 and in many ways marks the end of CLAMP's 90s era, tying up and saying goodbye to the stories of Subaru, Hokuto, Seishiro, and the CLAMP School, for now. There's a stylistic and even tonal shift after X halted, ending a run of tragic, violent, interpersonal psychology that so characterized their early writing. Reading it was bittersweet in that regard, as going through CLAMP's early years has made these characters, ideas, and dynamics some of my all-time favourites. At turns frustrating and meandering, revelatory and awe-inspiring, a surreal mix of Western and Eastern mythologies, with some of their most beautiful art yet, let's bid farewell to Tokyo and the Earth with CLAMP's most ambitious work yet. Heavy spoilers!

Synopsis: In the year 1999, the esper Shirou returns to Tokyo to fulfill his mother's dying wish of changing the fate of Earth. Kamui is destined to save the world, or destroy it, but he only cares about the protecting his childhood friends, Kotori and Fuuma Monou. In his wake are drawn the Dragons of Heaven, who fight to preserve humanity and the Earth as is, and the Dragons of Earth, who seek to destroy humanity and renew the Earth from our corruption. As the promised day of destruction draws near, what does Kamui wish for? And who is the second Kamui, and how is he connected to Fuuma?

The Story: A Christ figure character having to save Earth? Everything being re-explained at least 3 times? Constant dream scenes? In every way, X seems poised to fail, but CLAMP succeeds in infusing a level of ambition and sweeping grandeur that lifts X up in spite of itself. What sells X is that it takes a story about the end of the world and tells it on an emotional, inner-world scale - dreams become entire volumes as characters puzzle out destiny and what makes life worth living. The entire first arc revolves around building the relationship between the main trio, and Kamui's character psychology, so that Kamui's choice actually resonates and emotionally and narratively destroys us. The entire sequence of Kamui and Subaru inside Kamui, and the end of Seishiro and Subaru's arc will haunt me FOREVER.

At the same time, it contains all the sweeping epicness of RG Veda (and shares many motifs and plot elements!), presenting the tales of god-like characters against the backdrop of emotional, homoerotic fights. We're dealing with fate and god-like power, but all of this is placed against the question of, "who are you? and what do you want? And is that the right choice for others and yourself?" Set against the fight between two homoerotic best friends - honestly this manga is so sexually charged, from the BDSM undertones to Satsuki's computer-sex. This god-scope conflict is reduced to our own base instincts for humanity and sensation and consumption and intimacy. There's highly compelling stuff in here. It's so shojo in the best way.

That's not to say X doesn't have structural issues. It has some severe pacing issues, mostly at the end as the Dragons of Heaven are stuck losing battles while Hinoto goes evil and Kamui can't make a kekkai, ad nauseam. It feels like trying to fit the Tarot card number to number of characters, bloated the story. Additionally, while I really love the Keiichi arc, I think X needs more grounding in characters not tied to the apocalypse. Destruction can often feel weightless, an issue for a story that trades on the idea of human connection vs. apathy. Gaia Theory (killing humans will save Earth) is also just bullshit, which can make the conflict frustrating because nobody questions its logic.

Still, despite all that, I can't argue that X is just compelling. It has SUCH a strong sense of millennium angst mood, such interesting character and thematic ideas, lays just enough narrative bread crumbs, that it's visceral enough to work despite itself.

The Themes: X is sooo crystallized RG Veda with the deeply psychological exploration of human loneliness of Tokyo Babylon, CLAMP once again returning to these core themes of their career at a new, fresh angle! X feels so thematically cohesive in what it's trying to do. It's the journey of The Fool across the tarot deck into Judgment and The World. X takes the notion of fate internally, beyond the will of the stars, to explore shadow selves and personal desire. I LOVE a mirror character and Greek tragedy; I ate up the dualism and fatal flaws. It's all very (attributed to) Carl Jung: Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate. Fuuma reads the deepest, most self-destructive wishes of others, and is himself the shadow self Kamui cannot accept: only by realising his true wish and self, can destiny be overturned!

People focus heavily on the apocalyptic conflict, but X is so meaty because it is fundamentally about our own sense of self-identity. X deconstructs RG Veda's thesis that holding onto your wish (CLAMP defines as love for one person), beyond reason, pity and rectitude, is NOT a moral high ground. It tracks Subaru's character to its logical end-point: The Dragons of Heaven subsume their love for one singular person into their only self-worth that they self-destruct without them. Conversely, the Dragons of Earth lack all connection to anyone. It's nature vs humanity, attachment vs detachment, desire vs freedom. For all its Christian trappings, X is deeply Buddhist: we escape samsara in a middle path of a stable self-identity, beyond apathy and desire. X uses the end of the world to position the singular truth that you have to want to live and be a person.

The Characters: Oh Kamui, Fuuma, Kotori, my bargain bin Subaru, Seishiro and Hokuto, who are bargain bin Yasha, Ashura, and uh, Gigei I guess (who are themselves bargain bin Jotaro, Kakyoin, and Girl. God, it's just endless games of telephone between masculine reserved seme and feminine emotional uke. I see you CLAMP).

Okay being serious, I do actually find Kamui interesting - and I think it's meant to be textually repetitive. It's refreshing to have a shojo man who is a violent unpleasant little asshole. And while narratively I understand Fuuma absorbing these traits when he becomes Kamui's shadow, I don't care for the uke-fication of Kamui. Still, Kamui's inner conflict and inability to figure out who he is beyond "the Kamui" works. Fuuma never quite grew on me, mainly because he is so blandly perfect at the start, but I think he's acceptably charismatic as a villain. And the concept of twin stars is undeniably compelling. Kotori fared the worst for me. The purehearted housewife shojo ingenue is so riddled with sexism and Kotori never becomes anything beyond a satellite character - her dream scenes are narratively compelling, but her character is lifeless (literally) and dull.

The supporting cast fares much better, though it's too large. Aoki and Saiki, for example, could have been merged. Still, I loved Arashi and Sorata, Karen, Yuzuriha, Kusanagi, and of course, the conclusion for Subaru and Seishiro. There's such interesting ideas woven into the cast, and I really enjoyed watching them wrestle with connection and self-identity. The Dragons of Earth aren't as individually interesting, but they're just cool enough that it wasn't too bothersome (except Yuto. I kept forgetting him). The main issue is that having so many perspectives meant character arcs had less room to breathe.

The Art: With one major caveat, this is probably THE most beautiful CLAMP manga, ever. Very few pages have a traditional grid layout, with incredibly beautiful and inventive panelwork that bursts out and follows characters' emotions and dreams into consecutive pages of gorgeous spreads. Panels are layered but never visually messy and only enhance visual storytelling and meaning. The constant use of motifs and visual metaphor is, while unsubtle, just gorgeous that we become swept away in the grandeur of a new myth with swirling dragons consuming Earth. Water, feathers, sakura, ticking clocks and glass Earths lead the eye through dreams and inner worlds and even characterize entire interactions and distract from sometimes painfully repetitive dialogue. And the colour spreads and tarot cards are insane maximalist works of art. The fight scenes are illegible, but I don't think CLAMP knows how to solve this.

The character design is mostly memorable, transforming undeveloped personalities into fully realised characters, like Satsuki's bio-tech room - though Aoki and Fuuma look too similar. My caveat is I don't like the cuter look we get in the later volumes when they were influenced by other series they were drawing, though it still reads (Vol 1-10ish are the peak). Still, the art grants the story a mythos greater frankly, than what it ever achieved in its writing.

Questionable Elements: I've alluded that many CLAMP manga have a baseline sprinkle of sexism - not anymore than a lot of shojo, but something I'm more able to spot now than when I was a teen. X is decidedly more sexist. FIVE separate women are fridged to either help a male character and/or cause a male character pain, with Hokuto's being the worst because X strips her of so much agency to turn her into Kakyou's lost love. Arashi loses her power because she is no longer a virgin. Yuzuriha and Satsuki's arcs revolve around their male love interests. Kotori's writing is terrible (bless the anime for making her a PERSON) and Kanoe can definitely veer into hyper-sexualized fanservice in a way male characters aren't. I don't love how Karen's emotional worth culminates in becoming a mother. And Nataku lacking a soul because they weren't "born from a mother" sits poorly (plus being genderless because they're literally from a lab). X is one of my favourite CLAMP works, but it has a sexism issue and I think dismissing it as "well, it's a tragedy", fails to see the differences in how women are written and treated by the story, vs. the men.

The Ending: So, the elephant in the room is X has no ending. The anime and movie attempt to conclude things, to mixed effect: the anime ignores that Kamui's true wish is NOT to bring Fuuma back, and while the movie ending ties us back to X's inspiration Devilman, it feels mostly for shock. Ultimately, it doesn't matter because, how do you assess a story that is only 6/7 way told? I'm trying not to heavily speculate on whether the ending would have elevated or diminished X. In the end, I think X is still worth the read despite the lack of ending. As Subaru says, nothing will change and nothing will get better if you don't, but you will walk away changed if you do try it.

Overall: I've seen people say X is a series more to be experienced than to be read, and I both agree and don't. X is a visual tour de force, probably one of the most beautiful manga I have ever read and lessens MANY of its flaws. And it's true it doesn't stick all its story beats or character writing and perhaps, in hindsight, they might have written it smaller and more cohesive. But there is something beautifully human and raw and ugly and intimate at the heart of X, of human connection and shadow selves and self-destruction and free will, that really haunted me afterwards.

'X, despite its edginess, stands out from the drecks of misanthropic, apocalyptic, violent tales of dueling best friends for centering its story at the heart of the human soul. It remains deeply resonant and influential more than 30 years after it was started, and 20 years after it halted, and for that I would count it amongst CLAMP's best. It's a fascinating deconstruction of heroic sacrifice and selfless love and in so doing reaffirms human connection, individuality, and hope in the face of the apocalypse. The future, after all, is not yet decided.

[balderdashboard]

Animal, Kinn/Porsche

11:03 PM

What Kinn clocks immediately about Porsche is that he's unashamed. There's no pretence about him, from the fact that he's disdainful of people using power for selfish reasons, to how much he enjoys sex, and especially to how he isn't afraid (or at all unable or unwilling) to stand up for himself. What Kinn takes longer to process is why that's hot.

It's definitely not his typical. He usually goes for a bedmate that he privately refers to as "desperate slut but polite." He likes when delicate, manicured men beg him for his cock, swallow him down wetly and take his manhandling with trembling eagerness. After Tawan, he especially doesn't like it when there's even a hint of an individual person on the other end. Easier to get off if he's not talking, or even thinking too much.

Porsche makes him confused. Porsche makes him frustrated. Porsche challenges him on every fucking thing regardless of whether or not it makes sense. Porsche is a submissive.

In this world, submissiveness is something you have to earn your way out of, something to escape. Earning dominance in society is how to get ahead and how to stay safe. But Porsche wears his submission like it's something you'd have to earn from him instead, something you'd be grateful and lucky to be granted. It's the most Kinn has been intrigued by anyone in years. It’s infuriating. It's sexy as fuck.

Porsche had wiped his mouth as he turned to haggle for his fists, zipping up his fly unhurriedly. Porsche had grinned while he punched the lights out of the guy with the pipe. Porsche had held eye contact, unflinchingly, mockingly, had held Kinn still to take his rightful payment directly from Kinn's person.

When Kinn was finally collected by his bodyguards, he had gotten into his car, closed the privacy screen, and held his breath for silence as he furiously jerked into his fist. With the adrenaline it had taken two minutes, tops, and he had felt heavy and alert and throbbing in the aftermath. He had never wanted to fuck someone's smirking face so badly. He had noticed eventually that he was idly clenching his dripping hand, staring down fixedly at it past his naked wrist.

He had wiped his hand with a handkerchief, and called his father to talk personnel. How interesting that he suddenly needed more security.

--

I have decided to do a combination of kinktober, inktober, and whumptober where the goal is basically just make something once a day. Welcome to #winktober and please, I'm sure there are too many verb tenses in here but I lived 45 minutes of intense word choice decision making for every 3 minutes it took to write a paragraph and I am very high so just read through it for now.

This was inspired by the hottest video on youtube: Animal by @ amateuredit17. I have watched this an unhealthy amount of times and strongly encourage others to do the same. Speaking of excellent, I am unreasonably pleased about my most excellent stylistic zeugma in the fifth and paragraphs.

[monstersinthecosmos]

Kacy! 29, 30, and 48 for the fic writer asks please and thank you ❤️

(writing asks!)

29. What’s your revision or editing process like? !!!!!! I try not to ever edit as I go because I used to be really bad about tinkering and not moving forward, so I kinda like CHARGE AHEAD and get the story done, and if I think of something I want to go back and add, I write it down for an editing note. It also helps to give me fresh eyes when it's time to edit, because if I haven't reread the WIP it kinda helps if my memory is fuzzy and I can be a little more objective.

I also don't do heavy editing because I do the big moves inside my plot outlines. It's very rare that I change my mind on something huge that I have to go back and revise. I'm just constantly using the outline to sketch the story out so when I'm actually writing, all the structural stuff basically is done right the first time. I edit for like typos and flow and stuff. So the process is something like this

Copy editing notes into my notes app on my phone so that I can full screen the story but have the notes available on the littler screen

Change the font! So that your eyes are ON ALERT and the text doesn't look the same as it's looked for weeks while you were writing!

Pick the correct MUSIC TO EDIT TO because I always have songs that are integral to the emotional core of everything I write, so I need to play them while I read/edit as a vibe check to make sure the tone is correct. I always want the reader to feel the way the music makes me feel! So editing music is really important to keep the tone!!!!!!!

JUST START REREADING AND LOOKING FOR STUFF. I am a sloppy typer so I always have a million typos. I look for typos and like, if I reuse the same word/phrase too close to each other.

I do a separate read through for smut scenes to just double check that everyone's limbs are accounted for and no positions got flipped.

I do a ctrl+f for phrases like "a little" and "for a moment" because I know I overuse them lol.

I double check my editing notes in case I forgot something in the moment.

THEN I copy it into Google Docs (I write in Scriv lol) and run the gdocs grammar check because it helps catching sloppy lil mistakes. It will overcorrect you on stylistic choices so don't let it correct everything, but it catches a lot of typos for me.

AND THEN!!!!!! I copy it into https://hemingwayapp.com/ which wiLL READ YOU FOR FILTH AND TELL YOU YOURE STUPID so do not use this tool too seriously. I also often use passive voice ON PURPOSE sometimes so SUCK IT HEMINGWAY but I like to use it to check for dense sentences and just basically skim over and see if anything looks super sloppy.

THEN I POST IT ON AO3 and read it again because I always find more typos after it's posted because the pressure of it being public gives me better vision.

AND FINALLY once it's on AO3 I also have the screen reader read it to me out loud because that lady finds some more typos LOL. Hearing it out loud catches what my eyes don't.

30. Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished?

I very rarely share rough drafts! I usually make my WIPs available to Discord friends to get some cheerleading but I don't publish them. Occasionally I'll share like a WIP Wednesday passage or something if I get tagged or asked but otherwise I keep it TO MYSELF! 48. What do you look for in a beta?

bro I don't use betas lol. My mom Anne Rice told me not to let people edit my work.

Occasionally I use a beta because I need to like for a zine (like you beta'd me once for the horror Sheith zine!) but that's the only times I use one. I just want people to like, be constructive, and I want to be communicated with beforehand so that I know what they're looking for and I can tell them what type of criticism I'm willing to listen to vs. what's off limits.

I don't want to sound dramatic LOL but I had a really traumatizing experience in my first zine where I got beta'd without warning/permission, when they said they'd just be checking for typos, and I got absolutely fucking shredded. Like not a single paragraph in my whole fic was left alone, and the beta had like, rewritten sentences, rearranged sentences in the paragraph, erased stylistic choices, added exposition that I didn't write, and removed a bunch of references I had laid down throughout the story as a motif. It was genuinely like so demotivating and made me feel so fucking terrible about my writing and really fucked me up. I still haven't shared that fic on AO3 because I can't look at it without thinking I'm an incoherent fuckup. AND ALL THAT, AND LIKE ONE SINGLE COMPLIMENT LOL. Like one single thing in the whole fic that the person thought was nice. ashdkjglasdg . Lord I almost packed it in after that lol.

So anyway I don't look for betas, on principle, but if I do ask someone to beta I try to be clear like "Find typos and tell me if something didn't make sense." I don't need someone to like shave down everything that makes the story sound like me or add extra fucking sentences, like. Bro no. lol. And give me lots of compliments so I don't feel like I did a bad job because I don't want to feel like I'm being graded on my homework :(

[miidia]

Hello again everyone. It's me, Goose. This time around we'll be talking about the famously mysterious and genre-defining ゆめにっき Yume Nikki (Dream Diary) released between 2004 and 2007.

I first learned about this game in late 2020 through YouTube algorithm suggestions. It seems like the YouTube algorithm has a pretty strong track record of igniting interest in retro products and aesthetics. I remember not too long ago when it was (in my humble opinion) majorly responsible for the resurgence in popularity of Japanese 'city pop'. At that time, I wasn't actually too drawn in by those video thumbnails. Yume Nikki just came off as some unremarkable pixelated game for wasting time. I was definitely picking up on the darker vibes, but it still crossed me as kind of disinteresting.

Then, eventually, I actually clicked one of those thumbnails. It must have been the sprite designs of the game. They were so bizarre and often very visceral. I became attracted to the visual style, the music, and then... the backstory. It turns out the background of Yume Nikki but more particularly its creator, the mononymous 'Kikiyama' (a Japanese surname), is shrouded in great anonymity. That's not my story to tell, however. Plenty of others have already done that job. There's even a great podcast on the whole mystery by a Lewis Denby I highly suggest.

Once digging into both the mystery behind the game's creation and the complex symbolism and messaging of the RPG, it becomes evident that heavy themes are at hand... suicide, sexual assault, violence, childhood trauma to name a few. Granted, all of this 'story' is carefully extracted from a very nebulous but frequently disturbing set of actions, environments, sprites, and sounds/music. Because of this, the story is understood differently by everyone. Personally, I find the social disorder/childhood trauma theories most convincing.

Yume Nikki is a walking RPG. In the most literal sense, you spend the entirety of the game walking, moving, from one place to the next. Actions and interactions are possible but relatively limited in what they have to offer. You are essentially responsible for collecting a number of 'eggs' within the interconnected but discrete maps of the game, and I figure this mechanic is less intended to be gameplay as much as it drives the player to explore all possible locations in the game. It's meditative and self driven. I feel sometimes when I play it that you really get out what you put it. It's a mirror in some ways, reflecting our stirring thoughts and questions back at us in statement form. With any sort of dialogue or inner monologue absent, the narrative of the game becomes your interpretation of Madotsuki (our main character, a shut-in young girl) and her waking life and dream environments. Madotsuki (窓付き) is not a real/common name in Japanese; it literally means 'window-fixed'. I wonder if this choice was meant to highlight Madotsuki's ruminating nature, exacerbated by physical isolation.

Yume Nikki, as I mentioned, is a genre-defining title which has incredibly clear influence on a number of widely known titles such as Omori, Undertale, and Lisa: The First to name a few. Of course, Yume Nikki itself draws strong stylistic inspiration from and directly references the Famicom's MOTHER (of the EarthBound series).

I'm finding it difficult to find an appropriate comment to conclude this post with. I feel like my journey with Yume Nikki is nowhere near over; I actively do and will continue to return to this game many times in the future. I think one day I would like to try making music in the style of the game. I have always been very moved by video game music. Needless to say, this conversation will continue through the discussions of other titles like those mentioned in this post. In the mean time, don't let Uboa get you!

Until next time,

Goose

EDIT: BONUS THOUGHTS!! Just as the final paragraph of this post suggests, I was struggling to find an interesting conclusion when writing this. I am returning to share that I often have Yume Nikki no commentary gameplay playing on my TV in the background of whatever I'm doing (or not doing). The game's atmosphere is so palpable... I could (and might even secretly want) to get let lost in this game. Tonight Mr. Goose is dealing with friction of wanting to have beautiful, inspiring, captivating thoughts while also wanting deeply to connect with the present moment. Peace.

[mwolf0epsilon]

Hi there. I'm still new to tumblr and to the starwars animated series fandom so I'm not very good at keeping up with things or asking about stuff that's been going on. As of late I've noticed there's a lot of discourse about Tech from the bad batch show. Could you maybe explain to me why? It's ok if you don't want to answer, I just saw that sometimes you answer these kinds of questions and you never sound mean when you do it? I'm trying not to sound dumb but I don't understand what's going on.

Yesterday when I got this ask I decided I wasn't going to answer it immediately. Both because it was my birthday and I'd rather enjoy it than delve deep into fandom drama that I'm not 100% interested in following, and because I just didn't have the time to do it any sort of justice in terms of explaining what's gone down.

Newbie Anon I'll be frank with you, I am not really sure what sparked the recent mess relating to Tech (there's always hot debates sparked by TBB for obvious reasons if you ask some of the older people in the fandom, but that's something I think you'll figure out fairly quickly if you stick around tumblr for a while). But I do have a bit of a theory...

I'm gonna keep this one under a cut for the sake of my followers and pals that don't want to get slapped in the face with this topic.

---

To start this off Newbie Anon, The Bad Batch is unquestioningly a Whitewashed Mess.

It has surpassed The Clone Wars in piss poor poc design, and while this is not a new issue (the clones have always been inconsistently portrayed as white men in various forms of older media) the animated series haven't done jackshit to fix the models despite the producers going back to fix other character models in Tales of the Jedi (proving that they can do so but simply refuse to properly represent Temuera's features in the characters that should all look like him).

Temuera Morrison as Jango Fett, compared to clone trooper Dogma

The example above helps point out some of the issues with the clone models. The profile of the face, the shape of the nose, chin and ears, the bone-cheek prominence and even the brow ridge is incorrect.

The shape of the lips and eyebrows are the only parts of the model that look right. The eyes are almost correct if not for their size and coloration. This is less of a stylistic choice like many claim, and more obviously an attempt to make the clones's features resemble less of those of a Polynesian man and more of an Euro-centric man.

Cody is another excellent example of comparison because he was directly portrayed by Tem as well, and thus his model in the show is more blatantly incorrect in the way it was depicted. Down to both the features I mentioned above and also his height being needlessly exaggerated to make him look more "intimidating" (the wikia lists all standard clones as being 6 feet tall despite Tem being 5'7").

Commander Cody as he appears in ROTS compared to his TCW Model

And then we have Clone Force 99...

Clone Force 99 aka the Bad Batch

Newbie Anon, you'd need to be blind not to see the physical discrepancies between Jango Fett and the Bad Batch. The only member that looks remotely like a clone is Wrecker who unfortunately draws heavy inspiration from the Hulk...

The Hulk... Let that sink in.

Even Echo who was a standard clone prior to his capture barely looks like a clone anymore, and the insistence on keeping him looking the way he does while justifying it as medical in nature is offensive in many ways (both towards poc and the disabled) especially when Echo was most definitely treated very poorly by the writing team (dehumanized on various occasions because of his cybernetics all in the name of a "good laugh", portrayed as the broody "killjoy" that does nothing but complain and argue with Hunter, missing the point entirely on his character which we'd gotten to know long before cf99 were a thing, just to then toss him away when they no longer wanted to focus on anyone but TBB exclusive characters).

Their designs are atrocious examples of whitewashing and the fandom has been divided on this topic for a long long time now.

There's those who likely don't understand what the problem is, which doesn't make them dumb mind you. Not everyone who watches a show is super connected to a fandom or with this kind of debate. A show is a show, animated or not, and it's watched and sometimes not spared a second glance. And since TBB is mostly aimed at kids it's mostly kids who are watching it, and the issues pass over their heads because... Well they're kids and they're still learning. No harm in that at all, eventually they'll grow up and grow wiser (or not, sometimes that's just how these things happen).

There's those who have pointed this out time and time again, arguing that they should look more like clones because it makes no sense that they look so wildly different from the rest. Especially when the explanation provided is that their "desirable mutations" made them look like that (which essentially means that being white is a desirable mutation and that's a brutally racist thing to claim).

There's also those who see nothing wrong with their designs and that even consider them hot. Hunter, Tech and Crosshair especially are viewed as the Hotties of the squad and have a massive following of kinnies and girlies who would definitely not mind getting hot and bothered with them.

Which is where the recent discourse kind of starts off...

But not as unexpectedly as you'd think. More, it happened because of something I suspect is far too big of a coincidence to ignore. The overall timing matches up with the recent outcry at least.

So, there's this company called Sideshow. It's a figures/collectibles/merchandise company that has been producing high quality star wars figures for a while now. They take pride in making as accurate a facial sculpt as possible, and over the years they have improved tremendously especially when portraying characters who have Tem's features (mostly thanks to Hot Toys who've improved the original sculpts they were using).

A comparison between the original Sideshow captain Rex sculpt vs the more recent Hot Toys version

Commander Wolffe's two much older face sculpts compared to Commander Cody's more recent face sculpt

Clone trooper Domino Twins face sculpt compared to the Jango Fett face sculpt

ARC trooper Domino Twins face sculpt compared to the ARC trooper Jesse face sculpt

Sideshow and Hot Toys are undeniably good at what they do in terms of sculpting the faces of these characters. They've done a lot of improving and while some of the skin tones are still a little off off on occasion (especially in Rex who's lighter hair color automatically makes his skin tone look even more pale than it already does), you can't exactly say they don't look like the source material.

When it comes to quality figures, the fandom was of course pleased when Sideshow and Hot Toys started working on a TBB line where the figures had facial sculpts that matched Tem more closely than their show counterparts.

The first three figures of the TBB line to be unveiled

Obviously there's still issues (especially on the skin tone department) but you can see Tem's features more easily in Hunter and Echo. In Crosshair's case he seems more like he's related to the clones rather than being a clone himself (he looks like he could be the son of a clone) but at the very least the shape of the eyes, brows and ears is a more accurate match than what his model looks like in the show.

It's not perfect. But the fact Sideshow and Hot Toys tried to make them look like clones made a lot of people happy that there was someone in the companies trying. So when Wrecker and Tech's facial sculpts were announced everyone was excited to see what the end result would be like.

The Wrecker face sculpt revealed at long last

They managed quite well with Wrecker aside from how pale he looks. I'm very grateful they didn't try to make his brow and jawline thicker to make him look "meaner" or more brutish.

The Tech sculpt on the other hand...

The Tech face sculpt

They managed to get the ears and shape of the head right... But the rest is most definitely not at all what a clone should look like. I draw attention towards the shape and size of the lips, nose, brows and eyes specifically (coupled with his lighter hair colour and his hairline being quite receded and it's even worse to look at). The balance is way off to the point they manage to make him most definitely look like a basic white guy in altered clone armour.

This was a blow to people who were hopeful that the figure would make him resemble Temuera a little more like what they'd done to the others. It just didn't work for Tech and people were rightfully frustrated with it.

However, as soon as this was brought up there was a spark of "What's wrong? I thought you said Tech was hot :)" arguments with people laughing over the "Tech Girlies" getting what was coming to them for thinking their whitewashed pretty boy was suddenly less attractive than what they previously thought.

Now I could be wrong, it could have nothing to do with the figure reveals. I'm not very good at keeping up to date with fandom discourse because I mostly don't have the energy to care anymore (I'm here for a good time, I know my own convictions and where I stand morally, I don't need to constantly argue and moan about it when instead I could just pass along information and make my own stuff to share with the people who're here to have fun with me, I am not morally bound to star wars nor would I ever dare equate my enjoyment of the fandom to something like a marriage commitment because that's honestly ridiculous). But I donno Newbie Anon...

The timing seems too much of a coincidence and this fandom is notorious for starting fights very easily. Tech's figure coming out as the ugly duckling of the bunch and setting off a war between people who are genuinely disappointed the sculpt is bad, the Tech fangirls, and anyone who's just eager to pick a fight with everyone else, wouldn't really surprise me much.

I've seen shit like this happen in every fandom I've been. It's a matter of getting used to it and learning to pick your fights more wisely. Getting worked up about fandom discourse will only burn you out faster than you can say "oh bother".

[trickstarbrave]

I said “I think emo music doesn’t really have defined boundaries and is an amorphous mess which is why songs like “Scotty doesn’t know” her lumped in as ‘emo’” and now I have teenagers lecturing me going “uhm actually ‘emo’ is short for ‘emotional’—“ I did not get bullied in middle school in fucking 2007 for being an emo kid for you to tell me that. I am going to punch your fucking teeth in.

“It’s emotional and ‘Scotty doesn’t know’ is about sex not deep emotions” a LOT of classic ‘emo’ songs are actually not that deep and a lot of emotional alt music is not classified as emo. Within temptation and evanescence were really popular in the emo scene but are not emo. Mariana’s trench are pop punk and fit musically I think more with emo music and write about heavy topics like addiction and loss and grief and are not classified as emo. “Dead on arrival” by fob is a classic ‘emo’ song and it is not that fucking deep.

There are probably more music theory things you could analyze like stylistic choices and instruments used or whatever. I’m dumb and don’t understand that shit. But I will break your teeth in if you assume I’m fucking clueless abt emo music and the subculture. You can get rid of my ugly ass skinny jeans and weird mullet with side swept bangs and bad eyeliner and ugly arm warmers. But you will never remove the mark it left on my soul. I want to rip you open

[animehouse-moe]

Mobile Suit Gundam - The Witch From Mercury Season 2 Episode 2: What They Wish For

Maybe with the break in seasons, and having a chance to mull things over, I've found that that overall story and direction can be a bit crass at times. Or maybe it's the shift in material and the feeling of rushing towards a goal that exposes the pieces more than the first season. Whichever it is, there's still plenty of great parts to the episode, and one massive reveal, so there's more than enough to chat about.

⚠️Warning: Massive Spoilers Ahead⚠️

So, let's start with the big reveal. The fandom from effectively episode 1 of the first season has been on the "Ericht is Aerial" theory. And I'll say it straight up, I'm not a big fan of it really. It's hard to explain because there's a lot to my reasoning, but if I had to choose something, it's largely about how Prospera approaches revenge and justification. She uses Ericht as a tool still, yes, but lovingly refers to her as her daughter and is going to quite literally change the world for her. I felt like Prospera's distance as a mother was far stronger/better when assuming that Aerial was still 'inhuman'. Though, in the first place, was Aerial ever inhuman? Even in the prologue, Ericht was able to talk with Lfrith fairly easy.

Also, perhaps it's a stylistic choice as it centers around Prospera's conversation, but I found the visualization of a young Ericht to be rather odd, and largely due to the interlude novel Cradle Star, which you can read here for free. Anyways, the point is that the novel is from Aerial/Ericht's perspective, and so their monologue can be taken at face value. In the novel they come off far form the existence of a child, but then even further into the timeline than that interlude novel we have Ericht represented as a child still. Just sort of something that bothers me within the context of it all.

Now, what do I like about it? Well, there's talks of Prospera and Delling and "Gods", but the visuals given already paint a better picture. Ericht is already viewed as a God. The entire scene of Sophie reaching out towards Aerial/Ericht is pretty obvious in that sense. Whether they use this symbolism in opposition to the hubris that Prospera and Delling are attempting to commit is a different story, but I can really appreciate their use of the "blessed child" when those around them are cursed.

While on the topic of Sophie, I did like her story. I feel they could have done more to create more dissonance between her desires and her actions considering that she's so young, but I think they just made the cut to sell the moment.

I guessed what I've realized while writing this all out is that this second season just needs more time. Within two episodes this season we've had: Ericht revealed, Sophie killed, Prospera's end goal exposed, an effective war declared on Earth, and all of Shaddiq and Elan's scheming. It feels like a lot to take in when you consider the pacing of the previous season. Not that you can't speed things up, but most people prefer a decline rather than a cliff.

As an example, think back to the first season. Elan first expressed interest in Suletta through her first duel. He spent time around her, got angry about her being "blessed", had a whole character arc, and then was terminated. Sophie just isn't there as an "important" character. She doesn't give viewers anything to grab onto, anything to really feel in her short time with Suletta. We get the same sentiment she speaks about during her fights, and we get a slideshow of her interactions.

It just feels like the story's on a schedule for season 2. It has its eyes on the prize and isn't letting anything get in the way, so the pacing feels incredibly brisk after the long break we had between seasons. That's not to say that there isn't good or redeeming aspects in season 2, but if there were to be any concerns or issues, it absolutely lies in the pacing and heavy-handed nature that has been adopted for this stretch of episodes.

Thankfully, we're only 2 episodes in to the season so there's plenty of room to rectify things, and we've still been getting incredible visual work. In terms of direction, were spoiled with the final episode of the first season, so I wouldn't say it's been "stellar" work in comparison to that, but it's more than satisfying.

So at the end of the day, I'd say there's tradeoffs being made. We get more action and more "gundam" stuff, but it's at relative cost to the story and its progression. Only time will tell if it ends up worth it or not, but I certainly believe these episodes that are getting the ball rolling for Season 2 feel at odds with the nature of the first season.

[ao3feed-peterstiles]

Rotting Ichor and Dimming Sparks

Read it on AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/44119023

by IStillPlayWithLegos

When Stiles is ten, he becomes intimately acquainted with the rancid taste of death. 

One moment his mother is screaming obscenities at him. Blaming him for her madness and for the voices she hears. For being the reason she was cast out and forsaken. She is a madwoman with no recognition that it is her only son who sits with his arms around his knees, huddled in a corner and looking years younger than his age while frightened tears stream down his face.

One moment, she is rage personified. The next, she is still—Looking at Stiles with an unfamiliar, calculating gaze, murmuring words in a language he distantly recognizes but does not yet speak.

The last words Claudia Stilinski’s mouth (because, make no mistake, whatever was speaking was not Claudia Stilinski ) ever forms are said with a grating voice that seems to ring in the cramped hospital room. Its head cocks to the left, and there’s an unearthly glimmer in the otherwise empty void of those now pitch-black eyes. They seem to bore into Stiles’ very soul.

Don't worry. You'll hear them soon too, Mieczyslaw. You're one of mine, my darling.

Words: 4556, Chapters: 1/3, Language: English

Series: Part 1 of Reaper!Stiles

Fandoms: Teen Wolf (TV)

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Categories: M/M

Characters: Stiles Stilinski, Sheriff Stilinski, Peter Hale, Talia Hale, Claudia Stilinski, Original Hale Character(s), Scott McCall (Teen Wolf), Derek Hale, Gerard Argent, Kate Argent

Relationships: Peter Hale/Stiles Stilinski

Additional Tags: Insanity, Murder, Arson, Self-Mutilation, Deaf Stiles Stilinski, Original Character(s), Hale Family Feels, Talking To Dead People, Magical Stiles Stilinski, Graphic Description of Burns/Wounds, Body Horror, The Hale Fire (Teen Wolf), Heavy Angst, Blood and Gore, Child Death, Mercy Killing, Canonical Character Death, Major Character Undeath, Angst with a Happy Ending, Crack Treated Seriously, aggressive flirting, Peter Hale is the pack spaceheater I don't make the rules, Run-On Sentences, It's a stylistic choice fuck you Mrs. Walker I'll write how I wanna write, Warning: Gerard Argent, Warning: Kate Argent, They're both really fucking bad here (but don't worry they're die screaming 😌), ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder), ADHD, AO3 why won't you let me tag in order ;-;

Read it on AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/44119023