#my writing skills are so rusty lol

[wastingawayinmyroom]

"Nico?"

He almost cleaved the poor boy in two. The whole situation reminded him of the time he disturbed an older boy in the Lotus Casino, one who was so focused on his video game that, in surprise, hit Nico with the controller. He had thought Bianca would be mad at him, but the only one she lashed out at was that teenager.

He felt a pang of sadness at the thought of her. Not now, he thought. Not right after Will.

"Gods, Harley," he said, pulling him into a hug and ruffling his hair affectionately. "Don't sneak up on me like that. You'll end up like one of the practice dummies in the arena."

Harley giggled. Nico couldn't remember the last time he'd laughed like that.

"Why aren't you smiling?" He asked. Nico realized he'd been staring off into the distance like he was waiting for someone. "Didn't feel like it."

It was Harley's turn to make a face. "You can't not feel like smiling. That's not possible." He squirmed out of Nico's arms. "Something happened, right? So tell me."

His brain went through a thousand responses, from denial to avoiding the question to shadow traveling to Italy to start a new life. "It's..."

William Andrew Solace broke up with him. The person he went to literal Tartarus with, the one who knew all his secrets, the one... the one.

His one and only.

His mouth settled on an answer. "It's complicated."

...

An hour later, after skirting the topic of blonde hair and freckles and sun-kissed skin, he was at the door to Sally Jackson's apartment.

"Oh, Nico!" She said when the door opened. "I haven't seen you in so long! Come in!"

He smiled, just so she wouldn’t he worried. “Thanks, ma'am. Is Percy around? I just wanted to talk.”

Her face brightened even more at the mention of her son. “He’s out running some errands, but he should be back in a couple minutes. In the meantime, how about you try…”

He felt bad for zoning out, but he couldn’t focus the moment he saw the framed pictures of Percy on the table. There was one on his graduation day, one with a car (Paul’s Prius, he assumed), and one with the two of them. Percy and Nico.

Percy would never think of him the way Nico thought of Percy. To Percy, Nico was just a little brother, someone to look out for and eat ice cream with.

To Nico? There weren’t words to describe it. He didn’t need words, anyway, since it was completely hopeless.

Besides, he’d only been without Will for a month and a half. Maybe this was just him longing for someone to hold, someone to know, or maybe just someone.

The door flew open, the sounds of laughter and conversation filling the apartment.

“Nico!” Percy said, uneven smile on his face. “Dude, I haven’t seen you in forever! What’s up?”

He smiled, for real this time. “Nothing much. You?”

…

Three hours after that, after some talking and crying and wondering where things went wrong, they were at the beach. Specifically, the one at Camp Half-Blood.

He'd never really been a fan of beaches, since he couldn't swim, and sitting by the water wasn't any fun. He'd rather teach a bunch of little kids sword fighting than sit still for more than a couple minutes. But Percy promised that he'd show Nico some new surfing moves, and when Percy asked something, Nico could never say no.

So there he was, sitting under an umbrella on a checkered blanket, watching the son of Poseidon ride the waves like it was nobody's business.

Percy was only wearing blue swim trunks and his necklace. Nico couldn't even recall a time where Percy hadn't been wearing some sort of blue, no matter how small. Nico also couldn't explain why he loved it so much.

It was the little things about Percy that made Nico so fond of him. The Camp Half-Blood necklace, the obsession with all things blue, that uneven, troublemaker’s smile… gods, what was he thinking? Loving Perseus Jackson was a mistake. He’d already learned that, hadn’t he?

“Nico? Are you ok?”

He turned to find himself staring right at Percy’s abs.

“Yeah.” He could feel his face getting hot. Gods, he was such an idiot. Especially when it came to Jackson.

Percy chuckled. “You’ve literally been in the shade this entire time, and you’ve still got a sunburn.”

Nico touched his face. A sunburn? “Must be all that time in the Underworld.”

Percy laughed, and Nico committed the sound to memory. “Seriously, man, you need to wear sunscreen. You look like a tomato.”

“Hey!” Nico flicked his arm playfully, and they both collapsed into a pile of giggles.

…

Six years later, they were in New Rome, walking and talking and reminiscing in some garden Nico couldn’t remember the name of.

Six years after Percy saw Nico’s blush and thought it was a sunburn, he proposed to Nico.

And a year after that, the same story was told at the wedding.

…

@neo-kid-funk ITS DONE!!!!!!!!

[blankinsidecards]

i’m writing a fic for the Legends & Lattes book (because this is a “write the orc x succubus lesbian smut you wish to see in the world” situation) and I didn’t listen to the audio book of L&L but I did listen to the audio books of the TLT and somehow Tandri’s voice in my head has become indistinguishable from Moira Quirk’s voice for Camilla Hect

[speedane]

Sugar Crash

Prompt: "wtf Q" (this prompt was taken randomly)

Tags: slight mentions of drugs and addiction

Summary: Sugar, in moderation, can improve one's mood. Of course, anything in excess is bad.

I don't usually write, but content drought has pushed me to pick it up again.

_______________________________________________________

Life has its ups and down. When faced with comfort, there is no reason to worry about tomorrow. Live, laugh, love, they say. Everything becomes some sort of a game. Time tends to pass by so quickly when having fun… that sometimes it becomes too noticeable when things start crashing down.

“Everyone wants to be a critic these days! Nothing is enough for these people!”

When faced with hardships, people had to cope. There are different ways to deal with stress. Some sleep it off, others resort to vices, while some…. consume copious amounts of sugar. 

“When I’m sad, I eat candies to make myself better! Or cake… mmm cake.”

Sugar can improve someone’s mood occasionally. There is nothing wrong with eating sweets once in a while. Of course, excess leads to ruin. 

“What do you mean you splurged your money on sweets??”

“I’ve had a tough week, let me have this Brynn!”

“Q!!”

Relying on sugar to manage your emotions could cause adverse effects to the body. Like a drug, you get stuck in a loop that your brain and body wouldn’t want. 

“Mr. Q, I do not advise too much sugary sweets...”

“It’s my cheat day today, old man! Leave me alone!”

“I’ll prepare you some tea then.”

Sugar as a stress-suppressant makes you overly-dependent on it. You pick it up once, and it was the most exceptional feeling ever. You pick it up a second time, and it wouldn’t be the same as the first one despite still feeling good. In hopes of feeling that same level of happiness again, you’ll keep consuming more sugar to satiate yourself in the short-term. 

“Hey, you didn’t tell us you’ll be having cake!”

“Look David, there’s gum drops, chocolates, soda, and gummy worms too!”

“Hey hey! Don’t touch those without asking me!”

“Whoa hey, no need to be snappy…”

At a certain level, there will be a time where sugar can no longer make you happy. You would feel terrible, like you’ve hit rock bottom. But your body has become too reliant on sweets that it crashes along with your mood. Lack of control could lead to disastrous results. 

“Goodness, Q, what is all this..?”

“I don’t feel so good…”

“Did you try consuming all of this into your tiny little body?”

Sugar must be consumed in moderation. Like any other coping mechanism, it’s not meant to make problems magically disappear.

 

“Tell me what’s wrong.”

“I just want to make people happy… but whatever I do, it’s not enough!”

“Calm down, don’t start throwing stuff now!”

Hardships are meant to be shared, and one man can never handle a burden alone. There is no shame in admitting you need help. Humans are not solitary species, after all. 

“Ashley, I’m sorry..”

“I can sense that you are having a tough day.”

“My body really feels terrible right now… I can’t move my legs.. urk..”

“No more eating sweets for you for a week or two… Don’t worry, I’ll carry you to the infirmary.”

You may not feel good today, nor even tomorrow. But nothing stays down forever. 

_______________________________________________________

Sorry for the chaotic writing, but I need to drag you all into total chaos in the most effective way possible. :D

[planetxiao]

i’m working on a lil bachira drabble as well as general dating hcs for some bllk characters so hopefully i can have those out soon

[jaeyunverse]

the perks of having a hot best friend

pairing: lee jeno x fem!reader

genres: fluff, crack, mild angst, best friends to lovers, college au

wc: 14336

warnings: profanity, sexual jokes, jeno is shirtless in a scene phew, too many idol features SORRY i lowk lost track of who i’ve included. i think that is all but lmk if you find something else!

summary: having a hot best friend is nice until you start getting butterflies in your stomach every single time you look at them.

note: JAEYUNVERSE COMEBACK WOOO i’ve missed writing long fics so much omfg but i’m shitting bricks as we speak LOL it’s been a while since i’ve posted something big and i won’t lie i’m hella nervous. i rlly hope you guys enjoy this fic ♡ please don’t hesitate to give me your feedback! here’s to hoping my writing skills haven’t become as rusty as i think i have hehe :’))

masterlist

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐊𝐒 !

01. an abundance of freebies and discounts

Lee Jeno knew the power his smile held. 

All it took was one flirty laugh combined with those sleepy eyes of his for people to melt. Being the resourceful person you were, you utilised that talent of his to its full extent. 

“Can you go and flirt with the cashier so she gives us a free muffin?” 

Your best friend gave you a dirty look. “You do realise this is supposed to be your treat, right?” 

“I am paying!” you exclaimed. “Just go do your thing and make her feel generous enough to slip a free dessert in our order.” 

Jeno rolled his eyes, but you knew you’d won. You almost always did. “Fine, whatever. You owe me one though.” 

“I’m feeding you because I owe you one,” you pointed out. “This makes us equal.”

“How riveting. I have to work so the person who owes me doesn’t have to owe me anymore.” 

“We can argue about this for hours or you can haul ass to the counter and place the damn order. I’ll Venmo you the money the moment you’re back,” you promised. 

Sliding out of the booth, Jeno said, “You’re lucky you’re cute. If this were Jaemin, I wouldn’t be letting him off the hook easily.”

You stuck your tongue out at him and shooed him away. Narrowing his eyes, he grabbed your wrist and pulled you along. 

“Hey!” you cried. “Don’t take me with you! The flirting won’t have any effect on her if she thinks we’re together!” 

“Everyone thinks we’re together,” Jeno muttered and got in line behind an old man. “She checked me out when we entered the cafe, saw you arm-in-arm with me and gave you the dirtiest look to ever exist.” 

You snorted. “Liar. You might be an eye candy but you do not command such a high level of attention.”   

“I’m telling the truth!” he argued. “I would know because I was checking out the drink she placed on the counter. I was trying to figure out what the person’s order might have been to get something so incredibly delicious-looking. I saw her out of the corner of my eye.” 

“Oh.” You frowned and took a step forward when the line moved ahead. “That’s unfortunate. Should we go to another cafe and try our hand at getting something free there?” 

“How about you stop being such a cheap skate for once?”

Slapping his shoulder hard, you grumbled, “I have to bear the weight of my goddamn rent alone while you share yours with three others! I need to cut down on certain things, asshole.” 

“My offer to move in with you next semester still stands.” Jeno wiggled his eyebrows. “I’m a really good housemate; ask the others.” 

“You live with boys. The disgusting things you do don’t bother them because they do them too.” 

He closed his mouth and thought about it for a second. Then, “Touché.” 

You rolled your eyes, but before you could make another snarky comment, a pleasant voice interrupted, “Good morning. What can I get for you today?” 

Jeno averted his gaze to the girl standing behind the counter and let a lazy smile take form on his lips. You raised a brow and watched in amusement. 

“Hey there. Can I get a Strawberries & Crème Frappuccino with 1 pump caramel syrup, 1 pump hazelnut syrup, and 1 pump toffee-nut syrup? Java chips too, please.” 

The girl—Lia, according to her name tag—looked surprised to see him blatantly flirting with you right beside him. Maybe he was right about every stranger assuming the two of you to be together, though you couldn’t fathom why. “O—okay.”

“What do you want, friend?” Jeno stressed the last word. Refraining to roll your eyes a second time, you said, 

“Iced coffee without milk. Could you add some sugar to the brew? I prefer my drinks to be sweet.” 

“Of course,” she said and nodded once, unfazed even after learning of Jeno’s status as an eligible bachelor. 

Snorting under your breath, you whispered to him, “Lia doesn’t give a fuck. You’re lacking.” 

He scoffed and nudged you away. “No, I’m not,” he whisper-snapped. “Get out of here. You’re killing my vibe.” 

You deadpanned and gave him a don’t-bullshit-me look but retreated to your booth nonetheless. The last thing you heard Lia ask was: “Anything else?” 

You’d only been sitting and scrolling through your phone for a few minutes before a hand slapped a receipt on the table in front of you. 

Glancing up, you inquired, “What?” 

“Read the order.” 

Dropping your gaze to the piece of paper again, you picked it up. An appreciative frown tugged at your lips as Jeno slid into his seat. “You managed to get us a free muffin and a free bagel?”

“Don’t ever question my talents again,” he ordered and leaned back. Resting his arm on the cushion behind him and placing his ankle on his knee, his attitude was nothing short of a king’s. “I won’t tolerate any further slander.” 

“Uh-huh,” you muttered, utterly unimpressed. Though you admit, a smile threatened to break out on your face and you had to bite your lip to keep it from escaping. 

Jeno raised an eyebrow, as if waiting for something. All you did was stare at him, and when he realised you wouldn’t budge, he did an extremely horrible and high-pitched imitation of you that should have deserved jail. “Thank you sooooooo much, Jeno! If it weren’t for your flirting skills, I wouldn’t have anything to eat. You’re my one and only saviour, and I don’t know what I would have done without—”

“Order for Jeno!” Lia hollered. 

Said-boy flinched and clutched his heart with his hand. “What the… That was quick.” Clearing his throat, he turned his attention back to you, the tips of his ears red and his face flushed. “Whatever. I’ll be right back. Venmo me the bill amount.” 

You snickered and watched him get up. However, before he could move out of earshot, you called his name. “Thank you for your service.” 

Jeno glanced at you over his shoulder and did nothing but observe you for a moment. Then, a lopsided grin took form on his lips and he mock saluted. 

“You’re welcome.” 

02. gives good boy advice

“What are you doing here?” 

Pushing past you, Jeno strolled into your living room and plopped down on your sofa. “Is that any way to greet your best friend?” 

You rolled your eyes and closed the front door. Sitting down beside him, you placed your laptop on your lap again and resumed going through your notes. “I’m being serious. Were we supposed to hang out today? Because I cannot. I still have three finals left.” 

“No, we didn’t have any plans today,” he said, peering over your shoulder to check what subject you were studying. It was Economics. Horrible memories from the previous semester resurfaced and he shuddered before continuing, “Your text said you wanted to talk about something important?” 

You paused and glanced at him. “So you came over?” 

“Do you want me to leave?” Jeno frowned. “I thought it would be better to talk in person.”

He stood up and dusted himself off. Eyes widening, you grabbed his wrist and forced him back to his original position. “That’s not what I meant! I do want to talk to you but—it’s weird. I don’t feel like dealing with whatever has happened right now and I’m getting second thoughts about asking you for advice.” 

Concern seeped into Jeno’s face. “Woah, are you okay? You don’t have to explain anything right now. Just tell me one thing: do I need to beat anyone up? I’ve got a few gym buddies who are ripped.”

You huffed a laugh and placed your laptop on the coffee table. Crossing your legs, you turned to face him. Upon watching you get comfortable, your best friend rolled his shoulders back and did the same thing. 

“Before I say anything, I need you to promise me that you won’t laugh. Or make fun of me. Or call me an idiot.” 

“I won’t,” he answered immediately, though he wondered what issue warranted you to require his word. 

Taking a deep breath, you nodded. “YangYang asked me out a few days ago. I’ve always liked him, but not in a way that’s not platonic. I fucked up and instead of rejecting him right there, I asked him for some time to think it over and kinda led him to believe that I would say yes.”

Jeno raised an eyebrow. “How?” 

“I told him he’s my type,” you mumbled, cringing at the memories that came rushing back. 

“What?!” he exclaimed. “How the hell did you manage to do that?” 

“I don’t know!” you whined and buried your face in your hands. “He came up to me when I was in the library and asked if we could talk! I didn’t know he was going to drop such a bomb on me so I said yes. Then he started talking about how he’s always cherished our friendship and how he’s so glad to have me.

“I started suspecting where his train of thought was headed when he added a but to his sentence. He said he’s liked me for a while now and he couldn’t keep it to himself anymore. I was flabbergasted once he was done! I’ve always viewed him as a good friend and I didn’t want to just turn his heart down!”

“So you told him he was your type?” Jeno asked incredulously. “I know I promised to not call you an idiot but you’re really fucking stupid, Y/N! It’s going to be hella awkward when the group meets up!” 

You groaned and closed your eyes shut, letting yourself fall on your back. “That’s not even the worst part.” 

Jeno grabbed your wrists and hauled you back up. His face was barely a few inches away from yours when he ordered, “Explain.”

Taking a deep breath, you continued. “I told YangYang that he was cute and my type but I wasn’t in a position to think about going out with anyone with still two weeks of finals left to get through. I thought he would drop it but he asked me if I would think about his confession after our exams and I felt terrible telling him the truth. So I said I would. Yeji called me last night and said she set me up on a blind date with this guy in her class. You know how fast word spreads here. YangYang is going to know I dangled him on strings only to go on a date with someone else!” 

“You’re going on a blind date? With whom?” 

You flicked Jeno’s forehead. “That’s not the issue!” 

“Well, I want to know!” he sputtered and slapped your hand away. 

“I don’t know! Frankly, I don’t care either. I made a bet with Yeji and I lost. Now I have to spend an evening with a random guy I don’t even want to seek a romantic relationship with.” 

Your best friend sighed in frustration. “This might be one of your biggest fuck-ups till now.”

“I know,” you said quietly and dropped your gaze to your lap in shame. 

“You’ll have to apologise to YangYang and tell him the truth. He’s a good guy and he doesn’t deserve any of this.” 

“I know.” 

“Hey,” Jeno said softly. You glanced at him to see he’d gotten up and was holding his out for you. “Come here.” 

You rose to your feet and let him envelop you in his comforting embrace. Burying your face in his chest, you whispered, “I never wanted to hurt YangYang. I don’t want to lose him as a friend.” 

“You won’t as long as you come clean and explain everything. Don’t insult him further by giving him more half-truths. Guys would rather know what’s the real deal than be lied to and find out from someone else. Not only is it hurtful, but it’s a huge blow to the ego.”  

Your lips curled in a small smile and you leaned back a little to look at his face. “Is this about your mom lying to you about the tooth fairy?” 

“Damn right it is,” he grumbled. “I gave an entire speech about her being my favourite person in the whole world. That’s not something you recover from easily.”

“It’s been 15 years.”

“It’ll take me another 15 to come to terms with the fact that I used to rip my loose teeth out and place them under my pillow when I needed money urgently.” 

You laughed and pulled yourself out of his arms. “I can’t believe I’m taking guy advice from you.” 

“Why?” Jeno exclaimed. “I’m a guy too! Plus, I always give good advice!” 

You giggled and plopped down on the sofa again. “I know. But you’re also Jeno. I’ve never thought of you as just a guy.” 

“I don’t know if I should be flattered or offended.” 

“How about you sit your ass down and help me study now that you’re here? I made flash cards.” 

Snatching the stack from your hand, Jeno teased, “Oh, how would you survive without me?”

“I don’t have to wonder about that shit.” You grinned. “There’s no way in hell you’re getting rid of me anytime soon.” 

He laughed. “And thank fuck for that.” 

03. hugs always make you feel safe thanks to all the beef underneath

You were going to drag Jeno to the seventh circle of Hell. 

You couldn’t afford to go grocery shopping with him when you had a huge exam the next day. You hadn’t studied shit and were one “have you prepared for tomorrow’s final?” away from a mental breakdown. 

It didn’t help that Yeji had called you in the middle of the night to clear a doubt she had from a chapter you didn’t even know had been covered.

You’d been panicking ever since and it felt like you were going to get a heart attack at any moment.  

“Doritos or Lays?” 

“Kick to the nuts or knuckles to the jaw?” 

Your best friend tore his gaze from the rack of chips and eyed you warily. “I said I’ll help you study tonight.” 

“You don’t understand, Jeno!” you exclaimed and ran a hand through your messy hair, pacing in the supermarket aisle impatiently. “I’m going to fail! Fail!”  

Groaning, Jeno grabbed your arm and forced you to face him. He held your shoulders and looked you in the eyes, enunciating each word as he reiterated, “You’re not going to fail. We’re going to pull an all-nighter in the library, but we need to be stocked up on food before we do that.” 

You sighed painfully. It burned your eyes to just focus on anything—how the hell were you supposed to stay awake for another day and write a three-hour-long exam after that? 

“You could have come here without dragging me with you,” you muttered. “I could have been studying at home instead of wasting precious time.”

Jeno frowned. “Any more time in front of your laptop and you would have gone insane, Y/N. Your eyes are completely red.” 

“Oh, that’s not because of the screen time. I cried before you came to check on me.” 

Huffing a small laugh that bordered on exasperation, amusement and worry, Jeno threw a few packets of Doritos in the shopping cart before slinging an arm around your neck. You let him pull you against him and wrapped your arms around his waist as the two of you began walking. 

“Well, you needed to get out anyway. I don’t remember the last time I saw you leave your apartment.” 

“I stepped outside yesterday to play with the neighbour’s cat,” you said defensively. 

“Not good enough,” Jeno popped. “We’re going to go get a massage once we’re done shopping.” 

You stopped in your tracks and peeled yourself away from him. “The final is in twenty-eight hours!” you yelled, staring at him incredulously. “Are you fucking stupid?!” 

“So you have plenty of time to de-stress before you start studying again!” he chirped, paying no heed to your concerns nor the people who had heard your outburst and were giving you odd looks. “Trust me, I went for a massage before my final and I was so relaxed. It helped me to focus too.” 

“Jeno,” you uttered his name with barely contained impatience. “I don’t have time. I need to cover a lot of shit before I go and sit in the fucking examination hall.” 

“And I said I’ll help!” he repeated, sounding almost exasperated. Pushing the shopping cart forward again, he studied the shelves and continued, “You always do this, Y/N. You freak out before a test and act like the world is ending only for you to do super well.”

“Well—” you began, stumbling after him— “that’s just my coping mechanism! The more worried I am, the better I do. But I’m screwed for real this time!” 

“No,” Jeno popped, placing a 2-litre bottle of Sprite in the cart. “I’m not listening to you this time. Especially not after you stayed awake for three days straight for your midterm.” 

You sighed again. There was no arguing with your best friend. “How long is this massage of yours going to take?” 

“We’ll be back at your place in two hours max,” he reassured you, patting your head. You swatted his hand away and gave him a dirty look. “I think we have everything we need to make it through today and tomorrow.” 

“Why do we need such a big bottle of Sprite?” 

“Party at my place this weekend. There’s a discount so I’m buying in advance.”

You frowned. “Shouldn’t you be stocking up on booze?”

“The guys said I have an alcohol addiction,” Jeno said, getting in line at the billing counter. “Which is, like, totally untrue but you know I never back down from a challenge. I’m going to prove them wrong by staying sober for two weeks.”

“Sure,” you snorted. “You’ll just find lame loopholes or cheat when no one’s looking.”

A sly grin took form on Jeno’s lips. He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and drawled, “I know what you do when no one’s looking.”

“Really?” You feigned a gasp. “You know I sneak over to your house and steal your food when you’re not there?”

His smile dropped immediately. “Wait, what? That’s you? Not Hyuck?”

“The food thief is me but the one stealing your sheet masks is Hyuck,” you admitted.

“He steals my masks?! The ones I buy are expensive as fuck!” Jeno exclaimed, betrayal seeping into his features. His hands fell to his side and his eyes turned distant. “I can’t believe he’s been gaslighting me into thinking I do an extra round of skincare when I’m drunk.”

You giggled and pushed the shopping cart forward once the person in front of you was done. Placing the contents on the billing counter for the cashier to scan, you revealed, “Hyuck saw me raiding your pantry when you were at the gym. He used that as leverage against me for weeks before I saw him stealing your sheet masks and was able to finally strike a deal—he turns a blind eye to my robberies and I turn a blind eye to his.”

“Why’d you team up with him?” Jeno pouted. “I thought we were best friends.”

You laughed incredulously. “Seriously? That’s what you’re focusing on? Not the part where Hyuck and I used your stuff without asking?”

“Well, yeah, I’m pissed you used my shit. But I guess I’m just a little more bothered that you guys teamed up,” Jeno said and shrugged, fetching his wallet from the back pocket of his jeans. “Because, you know, coming together to make people suffer has always been our thing.”

You raised an eyebrow, slightly amused by how he was beating around the bush. “Are you saying you wanna team up with me to get back at Hyuck?”

Jeno grinned. “I’m gonna screw over that motherfucker so bad. You get off the hook, though, because you’re cute and I need your help.”

“You’re impossible.” You huffed and shook your head. Taking the bag of groceries, you said to him, “Text me my share and I’ll Venmo the money to you.”

“You could buy me an ice cream instead.”

“No,” you denied immediately. “We’re not wasting time on ice cream. Massage and then straight home so I can pick up my study material and we can leave for the library.”

Thankfully, Jeno didn’t protest. He drove you to your apartment complex and waited for you while you packed your bag. Then, the two of you were off to the massage place.

An hour later, you were done and forced to admit that the massage had indeed helped you. It felt like all the stress had left your body. Thinking about the final didn’t make you want to cry anymore and things were actually looking up now that you were rested.

You were able to retain the knowledge better and it was easier to understand the concepts. Jeno quizzed you and provided you with an endless supply of coffee throughout the night.

Right before lunch the next day, however, the panic resurfaced as you were revising your syllabus for the last time before your final at 3. You couldn’t seem to remember anything you had studied the previous night. 

You could feel another breakdown coming, but before you could hyperventilate, Jeno scooped you up in his arms.

You hadn’t even realised when he’d come back from picking up your food. One minute, you were trying to control your breath and the next, your face was buried in his hard chest.

You held onto his shirt as his hands rubbed soothing circles on your back and he rocked you from side to side.

“Shh, don’t cry,” he mumbled and kissed the top of your head. “You’re gonna ace the final like you always do. You were able to answer all the quiz questions, so keep in mind that you are prepared. The pre-exam anxiety is just clouding your thoughts. Everything’s gonna come back to you when you sit down to write, alright?”

Nodding, you clenched your eyes shut and bit down on your lip to keep a sob from escaping. Jeno’s presence kept acting like a tether for you. It always had.

Maybe he was right about the final. Maybe he wasn’t. But at that moment, engulfed in his warm, safe embrace, it felt like everything was going to be okay.

𝐃𝐎𝐖𝐍𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐒 !

01. having to deal with a narcissistic asshole. 

It was an especially sweltering day. 

You were being baked inside-out despite wearing a tank top and a pair of shorts, your hair tied in a messy high bun. Adding to your torment was your broken A/C. You’d requested your landlord to fix it several times but your efforts were to no avail. 

You would have kept bothering him incessantly and gotten the job done if you weren’t so intimidated by him already. 

Sighing, you eyed your bathroom. A cold shower sounded like an amazing idea. Jeno wasn’t supposed to come over to watch the movie for a while anyway. 

Deciding to cool yourself and get rid of the sweat sticking to your body, you entered the tiny bathroom. A high-pitched squeal left your mouth the moment you turned the shower knob and the cold water hit your skin. 

“Fuck,” you cursed and flinched, turning the knob the other way immediately. Your shitty apartment didn’t even have a valve to adjust the temperature—the water was either mildly hot or ice cold. Showering in summer was always a big problem.

“God, I don’t wanna keep doing this,” you mumbled to yourself and stepped into your room again. 

There was this… thing you’d been doing ever since you moved into this apartment. Whenever it was hot, you’d work out so you’d get more sweaty. That way, when you showered under the ice-cold water, it didn’t feel as unbearable. 

It was weird and there probably was no science behind it, but you didn’t care as long as it worked. 

So, you rolled out your yoga mat on the floor and began warming up. 

Within no time, your skin was glistening with sweat and your hair was damp. You were struggling to complete the last push-up of your final set when someone knocked on your door, causing you to lose your focus. Your arms gave out beneath you, and you collapsed to the ground. 

“Woah, it’s boiling in here,” Jeno pointed out intelligently. “And you look like you’re one move away from dying. God, I can’t even breathe Why the fuck are you working out with the windows closed? Are you stupid?” 

Groaning, you rolled on your back and watched your best friend as he moved to the windows and threw them open. “Hey!” you protested weakly and raised a trembling arm in a pathetic attempt to stop him. “I’m trying to do something!”

Jeno raised an eyebrow at you and grabbed your hand, hauling you up effortlessly. “Oh, yeah? Pray tell.” 

You crashed into his chest and rebounded, but he tightened his hold on you. His palm hovered over your back in case you lost your balance. Steadying yourself, you glared at him and snapped, “No. You’re gonna make fun of me.”

“I won’t!” Jeno laughed, his eyes crinkling. 

“Stop, you’re doing it already!” 

“Okay! Okay, I’m sorry. I really do wanna know what you were doing.” 

You eyed him for a moment, waiting for him to slip up and start laughing again. But Jeno’s face remained mildly curious. Satisfied, you explained, “Well, because I was feeling hot, I decided to take a shower. The water here is very cold, though, so I decided to work out in a closed room because that would make me even hotter. If I get in the shower now, it wouldn’t feel as cold because my body temperature has already increased, and the water would be sort of neutralised.” 

A beat of silence passed. And then, “I know I said I wouldn’t make fun of you—”

“Then stop talking.”

“But did you not realise you could have mixed the hot and cold water in a bucket?” Jeno continued, clearly still talking. “Or, I don’t know, come over to my place to shower?” 

“You live with three other men.” You deadpanned. “I was not going to shower in your apartment with Jaemin, Renjun and Hyuck there. Also, I don’t have a big enough bucket, so I will be buying one today,” you added, muttering the last bit. 

Jeno rolled his eyes. “God, Y/N, I would have kicked the guys out.” 

“What makes you think they would have listened to you?” you asked amusedly.

“Okay, true,” he agreed. “They would have listened to you, though. If there’s anyone who’s bossy enough to get them out of the house on a hot Sunday afternoon, it’s you.” 

“Are you calling me bossy?” 

“Are you going to shower now?” he deflected. “You stink.”

“Shut up!” you exclaimed and slapped his shoulder hard, but laughed nonetheless. Moving away from him, you kicked him off your yoga mat and said, “You opened the windows and interrupted my workout, so I don’t feel as hot anymore. I think I’m gonna exercise a little more so I don’t die of hypothermia in the shower. You can take my laptop and choose a movie till then if you want.”

“How about I work out with you?” Jeno suggested. “We can have our gym bros moment.” 

“I don’t wanna have a gym bros moment with you.”

“Why?” he whined. 

Flicking his forehead, you said, “Because I know you’re gonna turn this into a competition, and I’m not in the mood.” 

“Scared?”

“You wish,” you scoffed. “I’m tired from all the working out I did before you came, and I’m not going against you when you have that advantage over me.” 

“That still means you’re scared. Pussy.”

Letting out an exasperated sigh, you got into the position for a plank. “Get out if you’re going to keep being annoying and not contribute shit to our gym bros moment.”

“I knew you’d come around,” Jeno replied smugly. You practically heard the grin in his voice when he said that. 

You closed your eyes and laboured your breathing as you felt your abdomen begin to burn almost immediately. “Had to, or I knew you’d keep irritating me.” 

Opening your lids, you turned your neck to see if he was doing the exercise with you. 

Your arms gave out the moment you saw Jeno shirtless, his bulging biceps on full display.

“Damn, you lost quicker than I thought,” he commented. 

“Why are you naked?!” you demanded in a shrill voice. 

Still in position, Jeno only glanced at you like you were out of your mind. “I was wearing a hoodie, Y/N. Did you expect me to do a plank in that furnace?” 

“Yeah!” you exclaimed. To your dismay, your eyes kept drifting to his well-defined muscles no matter how much you tried to focus on his face. 

To make things worse, Jeno noticed. And smirked. “Stop complaining if you’re enjoying the view so much. It’s okay to admit you have a hot best friend.”

Flustered, you scrambled to your feet and looked at the ceiling. God, you felt like a stupid middle schooler. It was insane how much of an effect Jeno was having on you. What was weirder was that your mind was drifting to places it had never been before. At least where your best friend was concerned. 

“Narcissus has nothing on you,” you muttered under your breath, and tried to gather your bearings. 

“Besides,” Jeno continued, having not heard you. “I do send you pictures sometimes. I don’t know why you’re acting like you’ve never seen me like this.��� 

“Your phone’s camera is fucked, Jeno,” you grumbled. “The photos you texted me didn’t capture half of what’s actually there.”

No matter what you hadn’t seen, you’d felt whenever you hugged each other. It didn’t take away your surprise upon seeing the 2440p quality visual though. 

“Is that disappointment I hear?” he taunted. 

“No!” you exclaimed and finally looked at him again. At the sight of his working muscles, you muttered, “Can we stop now? You won.”

“Ah!” Jeno dragged the word as if he had just stumbled upon a revelation. “You want me to stand up so you can get a better view of my abs? Got it.” 

Your eyes widened, and before you could deny his ridiculous accusations, he was towering over you. Wiggling his eyebrows, he gestured towards himself and flexed dramatically. 

“You’re an idiot,” you huffed, unable to help yourself. 

“Yeah? Then I guess an idiot just managed to fluster the shit out of you.” Jeno smiled and ruffled your hair. Bending, he picked up his discarded hoodie and shrugged it back on. “I’ll go and get you a bathing bucket from the supermarket around the corner. Don’t freeze yourself to death.” 

You rolled your eyes. “I won’t.” 

“Also, do you remember the shirt I forgot here all those months ago after I got wet in the rain? Can you find it so I can change into it when I’m back?” He frowned and looked at himself. “I’ll eventually toast myself if I watch the movie in my hoodie.”

“Sure, but you’re stupid for wearing warm clothes in summer,” you commented.  

Jeno gave you a dirty look. “Sorry for assuming your A/C was in working condition. Besides, you always want to cuddle when we watch movies, so I figured you’d be more comfortable if I was wearing a hoodie.” 

Your cheeks warmed at that, your heart stumbling a beat. What was wrong with you? You’d always known Jeno was caring and went out of his way to do nice things for you.

Typically, you’d have felt grateful for how thoughtful he was being. 

Now, though, you felt that and… something else that you didn’t really want to acknowledge. 

“Whatever,” you said instead, trying to sound dismissive. Pushing him out of your room, you continued, “I’ll find it. Just hurry up with the bucket.” 

A few minutes after Jeno was gone, a notification popped up on your phone. 

[jeno]: clearer picture that i clicked on jaemin’s phone for your viewing pleasure :”) 

You blinked in confusion and opened the photo that was attached below, your eyes widening the moment you saw it. It was a zoomed-in gym mirror selfie of Jeno wearing nothing but sweatpants and shoes, his muscular abdomen on full display. 

[you]: did you crop jaemin? 

[jeno]: ???? [jeno]: wdym……. [you]: the photo’s dimensions are weird [jeno]: oh [jeno]: what the fuck [you]: LMFAOOO [jeno]: STOP I DIDN’T WANT YOU LOOKING AT HIM INSTEAD OF ME I’VE GOT A BETTER BODY ANYWAY AND I’M GONNA BUY A NEW PHONE SO I CAN SEND YOU CLEARER PICS WITHOUT HAVING TO CROP THAT FUCKER OUT 

You bit down on your lip to keep yourself from smiling too wide. Right before you were about to type a reply, you received another text from your best friend. 

[jeno]: so are you gonna tell me what you think [you]: FINE you’re hot. [you]: happy?  [jeno]: euphoric

Finally laughing out loud, you shook your head. 

Narcissus had nothing on Jeno indeed.

02. female friends ask you to be their wingwoman 

You didn’t think you’d ever accompanied Jeno to a party without having someone ask you to set them up with him. 

“Please,” Yoo Jimin begged for what seemed like the thousandth time. “Yeji said he was single!” 

Sighing, you mentally cursed Yeji for inviting Jimin to Jeno’s party. “He is, but I’m not setting you up with him.” 

“Why?” Jimin demanded rather aggressively, making you wonder what it would take for her to quit nagging you. “Do you like him or something?” 

It took a concerning amount of effort for you to refrain from rolling your eyes. “I do not.” 

“Then what’s the problem?” 

“I don’t know, Jimin!” you finally burst and gestured at your surroundings. “Maybe I’m not too keen on helping you out because you followed me into the washroom and cornered me! Maybe I feel used because you’ve never shown much interest in me even though I’ve tried striking up a conversation with you several times before!”  

Jimin’s features softened, and she looked away. “You’re right,” she muttered, guilt and shame evident in her voice. “I’m sorry for jumping on you like that.” 

You immediately felt bad for snapping at her. Pursing your lips, you tried to cheer her up. “Don’t worry about it. You don’t need me to set you up with him anyway. I know we haven’t hung out much, but based on what I’ve heard about you from Yeji, you’re smart, funny and social. You have no reason to be nervous while approaching Jeno.” 

For some reason, you regretted encouraging Jimin to pursue your best friend. A gaping hole formed in your heart, and you wished she would go for someone else instead. 

“Thanks, Y/N.” Jimin smiled gratefully. “I know I’ve been a shitty person, but could you give me another chance? I’d really like to get to know you more.” 

And just like that, the hollowness in your chest was gone. You gave her a genuine smile of your own and said, “I gotta pee right now, but does lunch tomorrow work for you?”

Jimin’s eyes widened. “Shit, I’m so sorry. I forgot where we were.” Rubbing the nape of her neck sheepishly, she replied, “Lunch works. I’ll text you tonight so we can talk about it.” 

The two of you exchanged your goodbyes, and then she was gone. A few minutes later, you exited the washroom as well and headed back to the party. 

“I missed you,” a voice slurred in your ear. Arms circled around your waist, and a face buried itself into the crook of your neck. 

You laughed. “You failed the challenge, Jeno.” 

“Where were you?” he demanded in an almost whiny tone. “It’s your fault! I wouldn’t have lost at beer pong if you’d been playing with me.” 

Patting Jeno’s back in consolation, you replied, “I’m sorry you have zero self-control and commit to things you know you won’t be able to do.” 

Jeno peeled himself away from you and pouted. “You’re mean.”

“Thanks. Let’s get wasted together,” you said, but then added upon looking at his already tipsy condition, “Or I can get wasted, and your ass can keep me company.”  

“Don’t you think one of us should be sober?” Jeno asked as you pulled him along.

“I’m not gonna hold back from drinking!” you exclaimed. “Let me remind you that you were supposed to be the sober one today and make sure I didn’t do anything stupid. I’m blaming you if I get naked in the yard.” 

Thanks to the music that was gradually getting louder as you approached the main party area, you didn’t hear your best friend’s response. You tightened your grip on his hand when the crowd thickened. Wading your way through the dancing throng, you finally reached the table lined with alcohol and food. 

You chose a bottle of Romanov and popped it open, drinking straight from it. You’d barely taken a few gulps when Jeno snatched it from you and put it to his own mouth. 

Throwing him a dirty look, you picked up another bottle for yourself. “Do you wanna dance?”

“I wanna throw up.” 

“Suit yourself.” You shrugged and aimed for the dance floor. A smile crept on your face upon seeing Jaemin; you were not in the mood to dance alone. 

“Y/N!” he hollered when he noticed you. Stumbling towards you, he pulled you in a quick embrace. “I haven’t seen you in so long!” 

“Finals!” you answered. Jaemin nodded in understanding and ran a hand through his hair, taking a swig from his beer. “Do you wanna dance?” 

You grinned. “You know I do.” 

The next few hours were a complete blur. The bottle in your hand was replaced by more one after the other, and when Jaemin deemed you’d had enough to drink, he gave you a red solo cup filled with water instead. 

It felt good to finally unwind after the horrible few weeks you’d had. There was no academic stress weighing down on you anymore, and though you were low on sleep, you didn’t want to stop partying. 

You just wished you and Jeno had gotten wasted together. While you were having fun with Jaemin, partying with Jeno was a different experience entirely. 

Right as you were about to take a sip from your cup, you felt an arm being thrown around your neck. The touch was so familiar that you recognised who it was immediately. 

“I missed you!” you exclaimed. Jeno looked down at you with a grin on his face, a pair of black party glasses sitting on his nose. His hair was damp and fell over his forehead. Maybe it was the liquor in your system, but you could have sworn he never looked better. “Let’s dance.”

“Dance?” Jeno laughed. “Haven’t you been doing that for the past two hours? Don’t your feet hurt?” 

Frowning, you glanced at your legs. “They do!” you exclaimed, and looked back at him again, your bottom lip sticking out in a pout. Feeling tears beginning to pool in your eyes, you mumbled, “But I still want to dance.”

“How about we go on the roof instead? The stars look pretty tonight,” your best friend suggested, trying his best not to laugh at you. “I didn’t drink at all after you left me. I’m sober enough to take care of you now.” 

Your eyes lit up at that. “Wow, that’s such a good idea! You’re so smart, Jeno. I love you.”  

Jeno’s lips finally twitched up in a smile. “I love you too, silly.” 

Plucking the solo cup out of your hand, he offered you an arm. You looped yours through it with a soft thank you and leaned on him as he led you upstairs. 

The two of you entered his dark room, and Jeno shut the door behind him. Only when the loud music was muffled did you realise your head was throbbing.  

He unhooked your arms gently and grabbed a warm blanket off his bed. Throwing open his window, he jumped out on the flat roof and looked at you expectantly. 

You staggered behind Jeno and took the hand he was holding out for you. His other hand hovered over your waist as you climbed on the sill. 

Thanks to the alcohol in your system, your balance was non-existent, and your legs turned to jelly the moment they made contact with the roof. Fortunately, your best friend was there to catch you.

You bumped into Jeno’s chest instead of falling to the ground. He wrapped his arms around you and steadied you, laughing a little at your antics. 

“God, how much did you drink?” you heard him wonder to himself. You mumbled an incoherent response and leaned against the outside wall of his room, watching him lay the spread on the floor. 

The two of you usually climbed the ladder that led to the slanting roof at the very top of the house, but you reckoned the boy in front of you didn’t want to risk taking you up there when you were so wasted. 

Jeno sat down on the blanket once he was done and peeked at you over his shoulder, patting the space beside him. “Come on.” 

Pushing yourself off the siding, you stumbled to him, tripping over your feet a bit. You were able to keep your balance, though, and a moment later, you found yourself lying on the blanket next to him.

Your shoulders brushed against each other, the warmth from his body seeping into you. It was summer, but the night air was still chilly, especially now that you were on the roof. You were thankful for the protection Jeno offered against the mild cold. 

The music was blaring once again now that you were outside, and there were no barriers to deafen it, but the volume barely bothered you. Your eyes were on the stars, trying to identify the constellations.

“I see Orion right there,” Jeno said, pointing at the sky. You followed his finger, and sure enough, there it was. “And there’s Ursa Minor.” He moved his hand after noting that you had recognised Orion. 

“I don’t see it,” you muttered, blinking heavily to clear your sight. 

“Can you see Polaris?” he asked, glancing at you for a moment. 

You raised your hand and pointed it at a random star that was nowhere near the one Jeno was referring to. “There.” 

Jeno snorted. “You could spot Orion, but you can’t identify the brightest star in the sky?” Without waiting for a response, your best friend grabbed your arm and directed it to the right star. “That is Polaris.” 

“Woah.” You gaped and lowered your arm. “It’s so shiny.” 

Jeno laughed again upon hearing the child-like wonder in your voice. You stargazed often and always challenged each other to see who could identify the most constellations in a minute. He knew the night sky was familiar to you, but seeing you like this reminded Jeno of the first time he brought you to his roof and introduced you to his favourite hobby. 

“Do you want it?” he teased. 

Eyes widening, you turned your neck to look at him, your faces so close you could count his lashes. “Really?” 

“Really,” he said and pinched your cheek, unable to help himself. “I’ll get it for you.” 

A wide smile immediately broke across your lips, and you threw your arms around him, hugging him tightly. “Thank you!” you squealed. 

Jeno chuckled, a little surprised that you had practically climbed on top of him, and part of him was caged under you now. He didn’t mind the sudden intimacy. It had always been his love language; any sort of physical contact with you—be it comparing hand sizes or carrying you on his back—warmed his heart. 

Patting your head, he asked, “You want me to show you the rest of Ursa Minor?” 

“Yes.” You nodded into the crook of his neck and peeled yourself away from him, but your head still rested where his shoulder met his arm. 

Brushing away a strand of hair that had fallen on your face, he averted his gaze to the sky. “Polaris is the tail of The Little Dipper. Now we move towards the left. See the star that’s above the brightest? That’s Delta. Epsilon is above Delta too, but the distance between them is not as much as the distance between the first two. Zeta is below—” 

You tuned Jeno out. He was still showing you the stars that made up the constellations, far too invested to notice that you were no longer paying attention to what he was saying and were looking at something much more beautiful instead. 

You’d always known your best friend was attractive. You’d have to be blind to not notice his striking features—they were sharp with a certain softness around the edges. His face always stood out in crowds and demanded people’s undivided attention. 

Rightfully so, you thought to yourself as you admired his perfectly straight nose and the shape of his soft lips, diverting your gaze to his eyes. You’d always thought they were his best features. They were warm and open and felt like home. It deserves to be appreciated. 

“Pherka, Eta, Kochab and Zeta form a—”

“You’re prettier.”

Jeno glanced at you, your faces mere inches away and those beautiful eyes peering into yours with slight confusion. “What?”

“You said the stars looked pretty tonight,” you whispered. “I think you’re prettier.” You paused for a moment, as if rethinking your words. Then, “I think you’re the prettiest person in the world.”

A fond smile crept on your best friend’s face, and maybe it was because your ear was in the vicinity of his heart, but you could have sworn you heard it thumping loudly against his ribcage. Lightly bumping his forehead against yours, Jeno whispered back, 

“I think you’re the prettiest person in the world too.” 

03. it’s very easy to fall for them, especially when they’re always so sweet and caring

The first thing you felt upon regaining your consciousness was pain. 

Your skull was splitting apart, the little bit of sunlight creeping in through the closed curtains rendering you blind. Nausea was beginning to set in, but your body was so weak that you weren’t sure you could make it to the toilet in time. 

You should have never drunk so much. Not only had you not taken any proper rest after working yourself to exhaustion during your finals, but had also danced to the point you couldn’t move your legs. Heck, you couldn’t even remember much of the party. You recalled leaving Jeno behind to party with Jaemin, but everything after that was a huge blank slate. 

The toilet was far away, but you could try reaching the dustbin near the study table instead of just throwing up on the carpet. Groaning, you tried to push yourself up. When that didn’t work, you put all strength in your abdomen and threw yourself off the bed. 

A shockwave of agony passing through your body rendered you immobile on the ground. You moaned in pain and curled in on yourself, covering your mouth with a hand upon tasting bile on your tongue. 

The door was thrown open, and a worried Jeno gaped at you lying on his room’s hard floor motionlessly. “What the fuck?” 

“Dustbin,” you croaked with much difficulty, tears springing to your eyes. They hurt so much you wanted to rip them out. 

Your best friend moved into action immediately. “I kept the dustbin right beside the bed in case you got sick, you blind twat truck. Along with painkillers and water on the table.”  

You found it in yourself to glare at the boy, but he ignored you. Placing the waste basket in front of you, he helped you up. You gripped the rim as he gathered your hair in his hand and held it up to avoid it getting in the way of your vomit. 

Right before you emptied the toxins in your body, you managed to say to him, “How capable do I look to you right now, you stupid toe-licking grinch man?” 

Jeno rolled his eyes and rubbed your back with his other hand, patiently waiting for you to finish. Once your heaving stopped, you took the tissue he was holding out for you and wiped your mouth. You felt much better after throwing up but you were still so tired. 

“Come on.”

You swatted Jeno’s hand away and rested your back on his bed, tucking your legs under your chin. “Too much effort,” you muttered and closed your eyes, willing the headache to go away.

“I was going to carry you to the bed, Y/N,” he said in exasperation. 

“I just need a moment,” you whispered almost incoherently, wishing he would stop asking you questions when you had no energy to answer. “A moment and an Aspirin.” 

There was some shuffling, and then you felt a hand brushing your matted hair out of your face. “Here.”

You peeled your lids open to see Jeno crouched in front of you with water and the painkiller you had asked for. Taking it from his hand, you popped it into your mouth and gulped down some water. 

For a few moments, you tried to regulate your breathing and calm yourself down. Jeno could tell you were gathering the willpower and strength to climb back on his bed. He wanted to help, but you clearly didn’t want it. So, he just watched you silently struggle.

He should have been with you last night; he hated that he wasn’t when he had promised to be the sober half. As far as Jeno was concerned, Jaemin was going to get an earful about keeping tabs on how much his friends drank. Never in the two years of friendship had he seen you with such a huge hangover. 

“Fuck,” he heard you curse under your breath. You moaned in pain as you pushed yourself up on trembling arms and fell on his mattress. Sighing, Jeno tucked you in and pressed a chaste kiss on your forehead. 

“Sleep well,” he said and made his way to the door. “I’ll wake you up for lunch. Renjun is making grilled sandwiches.” 

Your eyes flew open again. Fuck. You were supposed to meet Jimin. 

“Jeno, wait,” you blurted, and he stopped in his tracks. “I was supposed to meet a friend for lunch, but I don’t think I can make it. Can you cover for me?” 

Your best friend leaned against the doorframe and crossed his arms over his chest. “Which friend?” 

“Jimin.” 

“I thought she ghosted you.” He frowned. “Now you’re meeting her for lunch?” 

“No, you are meeting her for lunch. I don’t wanna be rude and cancel at the last minute. What if she already left?”

“It’s 10 in the morning.”

“Well, what if she turned down other offers because of the plans we made?” 

“She left an hour ago with Mark after passing out on the couch in Hyuck’s room last night. I doubt she’s had the time to turn down any other offers. Actually, I think she’ll be glad you cancelled. She looked pretty hungover when she left.”

“Why are you being so difficult?” you whined, wincing when the throbbing in your head responded to the sudden increase in the volume of your voice. “I’m only asking you for a small favour.” 

“I’m not being difficult,” Jeno defended himself and took a few steps towards you. “I’m trying to tell you that you may be overthinking this. Let me send her a text from your phone asking for a reschedule, and we can have some homemade lunch with the guys.” 

Sighing heavily, you averted your gaze from his and stared at the ceiling. “I just don’t wanna blow this. I think she’s really cool and I’d like to get to know her more. I’m good friends with everyone in our social circle except her. It’s awkward.” 

Jeno’s eyes softened at that. “Y/N, you’re not blowing anything. Rescheduling lunch because you both partied till you collapsed is not going to take away any points. Trust me.” 

Your best friend was right. You were overthinking this, but you didn’t exactly blame yourself. All your efforts to befriend Jimin had been futile till now. You didn’t want to do anything that could mess up the friendship that had begun to bloom last night. 

“Fine,” you finally relented. “Shoot her a text from my phone. I think it’s in my clothes bag—” you paused, your eyes widening. Lifting Jeno’s duvet in panic, you looked down at yourself. “Who changed my clothes?” 

“Ningning did!” Jeno answered quickly, the tips of his ears turning a bright red. He couldn’t understand why he was freaking out—nothing happened. 

You exhaled in relief, trying to get rid of the alien tingling feeling spreading throughout your body. Your cheeks were hot with embarrassment. “Okay. Well, my phone’s in my clothes bag.” 

Jeno busied himself, rummaging through your backpack that was on his bedside table. What you didn’t know, however, was that it was just a front for him to calm himself down. “Got it.” He waved the phone at you. “What’s your pin?”

“Your birthday.”

His eyebrows disappeared into his hairline, and a seed of warmth sprouted in his chest. A dizzying sense of affection for you washed over him, drenching him in happiness from head to toe. “Really?” 

You nodded and closed your eyes. Turning on your side to get into a more comfortable sleeping position, you buried yourself deeper under his sheets. Yawning, you mumbled, “Day-Month-Year with leading zeros.” 

“My password is your birthday too,” he said quietly after sending Jimin the text. “A lot of them are. It’s the easiest set of numbers to remember.”

You didn’t respond. Jeno didn’t mind. He knew you’d already fallen asleep. Keeping your phone on the table, he smiled sadly and stared at your resting figure in longing. “Everything about you is so easy to remember.”

Jeno closed the door behind him as he left, none the wiser about the fact that you were still awake and had heard everything he’d said, your heart beating so fast that you thought it was going to leap out of your chest. 

Your best friend left, completely unaware of the fact that you were now entertaining the possibility of being in love with him. 

𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄 𝐄𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐒 !

01. the green-eyed monster you resent makes an appearance more than you’d like

You genuinely couldn’t believe your friend group and their seemingly never-ending social battery. 

One would think that after a long night of partying, a person would stay at home the next day and take some much-needed rest. Your friends, however, thought it was a good idea to meet up for dinner and decide what to do over the weekend. 

You didn’t bother to remind them of the wonderful invention that was group chats. 

“We should drive up to the beach,” Mark suggested, flipping through the menu. “Summer just started, so I don’t think there will be a lot of people.” 

All of you were seated in a round booth at the back of a diner Chenle said he frequented. You weren’t going to lie; you could see why. The setting was very homey, and the cushioning of the sofa was very cosy—you were almost sure you were going to fall asleep even before your food arrived. 

Ningning, who was sitting beside Mark, peeked over his shoulder to see what was listed. Minjeong said, “That’s stupid. The start of summer is exactly when beaches get overcrowded. Most don’t get to visit the ocean during the year, so they make a beeline for the beach as soon as break begins.”  

“True,” you heard Jeno say. He leaned back in his seat and put his arm on the cushion behind you. You resisted the urge to lean in. Taking a sip of his water, he continued, “Besides, we’re already going to Jeju Island for a week next month. I don’t think we should drive three hours to go to the beach right now.” 

“What about karaoke?” Jimin piped up. She was sitting on the other side of Minjeong, opposite from Chenle, who was on the other side of the table. 

“We don’t need an entire weekend for just karaoke,” Chenle pointed out. “We could do it whenever we want.”

“Well, what about—” 

“Hey, can I take your order?” a female voice that was a combination of annoyed, upbeat, friendly and polite interrupted Minjeong. The girl looked a little flustered at being cut off, but she cleared her throat and mumbled a small yeah, just give us a minute.

The waitress did not move, so all of you awkwardly picked up the menu cards and began flipping through them. 

“The usual for me, Yuna,” Chenle said, smiling up at her. To diffuse the sudden tension created in the air, he began making small talk with her as she waited. 

“What are you eating?” Jeno asked. He was closer to you now, his eyes scanning the contents of the menu card in your hand over your shoulder. 

You shrugged. “I don’t think I’m eating anything. I’m not very hungry.” 

Jeno’s eyebrows creased, and he glanced at your face in worry. “You haven’t had anything since lunch. At least drink something.” 

“It’s fine.” You dismissed him with a wave of your hand and pushed the card in his direction so he could order whatever he wanted. “I won’t be able to finish anything by myself and I don’t wanna waste food.” 

“How about we share?” he insisted. “You eat however much you want, and I’ll finish the rest. Don’t go to sleep on an empty stomach.” 

An internal battle began. While Jeno’s suggestion was sensible, you knew he didn’t like to share his food with anyone. You remembered a time when he had refused to go on a second date with a girl because she kept nibbling on his meal. You didn’t want him to do something he hated just for your sake. 

“Really, it’s fine,” you repeated. “You go ahead and—”

“Hey, Y/N,” Yeji called, making you divert your attention to her. “You wanna share a triple-decker chicken sandwich? Chenle said this place is famous all over town for that dish.” 

You had to admit, a triple-decker chicken sandwich did sound tasty. But you’d just turned down Jeno, so you didn’t wanna say yes to Yeji. Shaking your head, you once again said, “I’m not hungry.”

“Why aren’t you hungry?” Mark frowned, overhearing your conversation. The rest of your friend group looked at you in concern. Ningning asked, “Are you okay?” 

You groaned. The last thing you wanted to do was explain to everyone why you didn’t have an appetite. “I’m okay. I’m just not hungry because I had a lot for lunch.”

“That’s a lie,” Jeno commented unhelpfully, and you smacked his shoulder hard in retaliation. He winced, rubbing the area of attack. “Hey!” 

“Shut up!” you exclaimed. Taking a deep breath, you said to everyone with as little annoyance in your voice as you could, “Please just order what you want. I still feel a little weird after last night’s party, and I don’t think I can stomach anything right now.” Before anyone could reply, you added, “I’m going to the restroom. Be right back.” 

Yeji looked a little stunned, but she got up from her seat and let you leave the booth when you requested her to move. Locking yourself in one of the stalls, you clutched your stomach and curled in on yourself, closing your eyes. 

Your period cramps were especially painful this time. Maybe it was because of last night’s exertion, but your cycle was early too. Your stomach was in too many knots for you to even think about eating anything. 

The washroom’s door opened, and you heard soft footsteps trudging towards you. Knocking on the only occupied stall’s door, a female voice asked, “Is everything okay, Y/N?” 

“Yeah,” you croaked, feeling tears burning your eyes. “Everything’s fine, Jimin. I just have period cramps, that’s all.” 

“Oh.” There was silence for a moment. “I have painkillers. Do you want them?” 

Exhaling through your mouth, you wiped your moist cheeks and stepped out of the stall. “Sure.”

Jimin smiled at you reassuringly and handed you a wet wipe, looping her arm through yours. “Don’t worry. I got you.”

Your heart swelled with happiness and gratitude. You’d wanted to connect with her for so long, and it finally felt like you were getting somewhere this time. Maybe you were being overemotional due to your fluctuating hormones, but you wanted to pull her into a hug.

“Oh, also,” you started a little sheepishly, “I wanted to apologise in person about cancelling on you earlier today. I drank and partied more than I should have. I thought about sending Jeno to cover for me, but he pointed out that it would have been awkward for you to see him when you were expecting me.”

“Woah, wait!” she gaped and took a step away from you. The shock on her face surprised you for a moment, but the feeling didn’t last long. “You’re kidding me! You should have kept insisting, Y/N! A lunch date would have been the perfect way for us to get closer!”

“I don’t think he would have considered the lunch a date because he was just a stand-in for me,” you said awkwardly, and threw the used wipe in the dustbin. 

Jimin waved you away as you walked out of the restroom and back to your booth. “I mean, yeah, it wouldn’t have been an official date, but it would have given me the opportunity to ask him out on a real one.”

“Right.”  

You hated the way you sounded. You hated the way your stomach churned, and your mood dropped. You hated that someone was pursuing Jeno. You hated that you were being forced to play Cupid, all thanks to your strong refusal to admit your feelings and the friendship you wanted to build with the girl next to you. 

“Oh, my God!” Jimin exclaimed, too immersed in her own fantasies to have noticed the change in your tone and demeanour. “I can make up for the missed opportunity by sitting next to him right now! You wouldn’t mind, would you?” 

You did mind. The idea of her making a move on your best friend made you want to dig a hole and cry. God, you were being so pathetic. This was completely unlike you, and you despised the way you were acting. You had to pull yourself together immediately. 

Besides, it wasn’t like you were ever going to explore these newfound feelings you had for Jeno. The last thing you wanted to do was ruin your friendship. Forcing an encouraging smile on your face, you said, “Um, sure! That’s a really good idea.”

“Took you guys long enough,” Chenle commented once you returned. 

You raised an eyebrow. “Did you have any other places to be?” 

“I mean I was worried.” He rolled his eyes. “We ordered food while you were gone. You sure you don’t want anything, Y/N?” 

“Yep,” you said, popping the last letter. “Scoot over and make space for us.” 

Yeji got up again and stood to the side as Jimin, and you slid into the booth. “The two of you better not make me get up again. I’m not budging even if you need to take a big dump.” 

“Sorry,” you muttered, smiling at her sheepishly. Making yourself comfortable, you grabbed your glass of water and dipped a straw in it, idly sipping the liquid. 

Jeno’s gaze caught yours from behind Jimin’s back. He pointed at her with a frown on his face and mouthed, “Why is she sitting beside me?” 

You waved him away and turned your attention to the rest of your friends. “Please tell me you guys finally decided what we’re doing over the weekend.”

“We did,” Mark piped up. “We’re thinking of going to an amusement park and then a water park.”

Jimin frowned. “Won’t those places be crowded as well?” 

“We just need to accept that most destinations will be. Everyone’s on break, so it doesn’t matter where we go. There will be people everywhere.” 

You agreed with Minjeong. “Amusement park it is. Can we hit the bars at night?”

“It won’t be much of a trip if we don’t.” Ningning grinned. “You sure you want to go clubbing so soon though? You were completely wasted when Jeno called me to his room and made me change your clothes last night.”

Mark snickered. “Are you scared of changing your own girlfriend’s clothes, Jeno?”  

Silence. No one spoke. 

NingNing was staring at Mark incredulously, and Yeji seemed to be suffering through an extreme case of second-hand embarrassment. Chenle pretended to flip through the menu while Minjeong grabbed her phone and scrolled through the apps on her home screen in an attempt to look busy. 

Jimin whirled to face you so fast that you wondered how her neck hadn’t snapped. You couldn’t even dare to look at Jeno to see what reaction Mark’s words had evoked out of him. 

Laughing awkwardly, you asked, “Who said we’re dating?” 

“You’re kidding me, right?” Mark scoffed in disbelief. “You guys are so bad at keeping your relationship private. Everyone knows there’s something going on between the two of you.” 

“Is that true?” Jeno asked, but no one present at the table dared to meet his gaze. “Do all of you think there’s something going on between Y/N and me?” 

“I mean….” Chenle began, dragging the word out. “You both are very close. People who claim to be just friends don’t cross the boundaries you two step all over everyday. But we’ve never seen you kiss either, so we’re not sure if you’re dating secretly or…” 

“You guys are crazy,” you interrupted. “Stop speculating about our relationship. It’s weird.” Turning to face a very betrayed-looking Jimin, you enunciated, “Jeno and I are just friends. That’s all there is to us.”

“Yeah,” Jeno added, glancing at you. “Y/N and I will only ever be friends. There’s no way I would date her. I don’t find her attractive in a romantic way.” 

Feeling a knot form in your heart and anger bubble in the pit of your stomach, you snapped, “Same. Jeno’s not even my type. I wouldn’t get together with him if we were the only people left on Earth.” 

Your friends exchanged knowing glances, and poor Jimin, who was stuck sitting between Jeno and you, made an attempt to diffuse the tension. “Okay, guys. We get it.” 

“I’m not sure you do,” Jeno hissed, staring all your friends down. “I can see your damn faces. The only way you’re going to believe I’m not into Y/N is if I prove it to you by going out with someone else.” 

Minjeong began, “That’s not—” 

“No, he’s right,” you fumed. Under the table, your hand curled into a fist. “The only way you guys are going to get this stupid image of Jeno and me being together romantically is if we date other people.” 

“The two of you are overreacting!” Yeji exclaimed. “There’s no need to get so defensive! We were wrong for assuming, and Mark was an idiot for opening his fat mouth. I’m sure you both would have told us if there was something. We’re all sorry.” 

There was a chorus of agreement on the table. Everyone genuinely seemed to be apologetic—except Mark, who was glaring at Yeji and looked mad for being called an idiot. His eyes met yours, and a sheepish smile took form on his lips. 

You huffed a small laugh and shook your head, but your heart was still in knots. There was a certain hollowness in the pit of your stomach. You felt sick and anxious. 

Did Jeno really have to say all those hurtful things just to convince your friends about your platonic relationship? He didn’t need to sound so offended and make your mutual denial a competition. 

Sure, you were the one who had declared there would never be anything more than just friendship between Jeno and you, but he didn’t have to cross the line by saying you weren’t appealing to him. 

Besides, you’d said what you’d said for Jimin. You didn’t actually mean the words that left your mouth. Considering the emotions you’d been feeling recently, it would be a lie to claim you didn’t hope for a different sort of future with Jeno. 

It didn’t matter anyway. A romantic relationship between the two of you wasn’t practical. Your best friend had never so much as hinted at wanting something more. 

In a twisted way, you were glad he said those wounding things. You needed to be pulled back to reality.

“Hey, Jeno,” you heard Jimin say once the food arrived and everyone started eating. “I was wondering if you wanted to grab lunch and watch a movie sometime this week?” 

Bile rose to your throat. You hoped to God he would say no. You didn’t care if you were being a shitty person; you didn’t think you could take any more of this torture. 

“Are you asking me out on a date?”

Your eyes were trained on your glass of water, but you didn’t need to look at him to know he was surprised. As much as you hated eavesdroppers, you couldn’t stop yourself from wanting to learn where this conversation was going. 

“I am.” Jimin chuckled nervously.

Jeno didn’t reply immediately. The rest of your friends were engaged in their own discussions with the people sitting next to them. The table wasn’t silent by any means, but the only things you could hear were Jimin waiting for his answer with bated breath and the pounding of your heart in your chest. 

Then, “I would be honoured.”

Oh, you were most definitely going to throw up.

02. you fall for them

You hadn’t talked to Jeno ever since dinner with your group.

He hadn’t reached out to you, and you hadn’t tried to contact him either. You’d received a text from Jimin the next day about the specifics of her date with Jeno. They were supposed to meet up for lunch at a restaurant near your college campus and then go out to watch some sappy rom-com. 

He didn’t even care for rom-coms. You’d begged him to watch one with you countless times and he’d always turned you down. Part of you wondered if he knew Jimin was updating you about everything and he was purposely pulling this shit to get back at you. 

But you dismissed the notion immediately. No way were you so dense and self-centred. Maybe Jeno genuinely was into Jimin. 

Your phone began ringing, and you rolled over on your bed, blindly searching for it on your bedside table. God, you hated being woken up in the middle of your afternoon naps. It almost always guaranteed a headache. 

“Hello,” you said groggily, your throat raw and dry. “Who is this?” 

“Oh! Did I wake you up?” It was Jimin. She sounded upbeat. Your heart sank. “I’m so sorry!” 

Pushing yourself up, you rubbed the gunk out of your eyes and made your way to the window. The darkness made you bump into the corner of your study table, and you bit down on your lip to keep a yelp from escaping. Hobbling, you threw the curtains open and said, “No worries. My alarm was just about to ring. How was the date?” 

Laughter bubbled from the other end of the phone line. “It was cool! He is a really good guy. No wonder everyone is head over heels for him. He opened the door for me, didn’t let me spend any money even though I asked him out, was an excellent listener, called me pretty and beautiful, and drove me back home. Oh, God, and the eye-contact? It made him a hundred times sexier.” 

Seems legit, you thought to yourself. Jeno had always been a gentleman. The other girls you’d set him up with had pretty much given you the same feedback. Part of you felt relieved that this date hadn’t been any different than the others he’d been on. 

Except the rom-com part, of course. For the life of you, you couldn’t figure out why he would agree to something he hated. 

“Ah, I’m happy for you, Jimin!” you exclaimed, trying your best to mean what you said. Your own words tasted like ash on your tongue. “Are you guys going on a second date?” 

“I’m not sure, to be honest. He said he had a great time with me, but when I tried to ask him out again, he just hugged me. That took me by surprise, and I kinda just forgot.” She laughed. “I know good dates usually end with a kiss, but the fact that he didn’t go for one didn’t bother me.”

“Oh,” you mumbled. Sitting on the ledge of your window, you asked, “That sounds nice. Do you think you’ll try asking him again?”

The last thing you expected her to say was no. And the way she said it… she didn’t sound sad or upset or disappointed. She sounded like herself. She sounded the way one would when they talked about the weather. 

It confused you. Didn’t Jimin just say the date was really good? She sounded so happy and delighted. Why was she backing out now?

“I—I don’t get it,” you sputtered. “I thought you were into him. I thought you had a great time today. Why aren’t you going to ask him out again? Did something else happen—?”

“Calm down.” She chuckled. “Nothing happened.” 

“Huh? Then what’s the problem?”

“Nothing happened,” she repeated. “That’s the problem. I like Jeno. He’s attractive, funny and caring. He’s everything a girl would want in a guy. But there was no spark between us. I had a great time with him, but hanging out today didn’t feel any different than usual. It felt like I was hanging out with a good friend, not with a potential romantic interest.

“I was looking forward to exploring what I felt for him. Turns out, it was just physical attraction. It also turns out that he wasn’t into me at all. If it wasn’t obvious the night we all went out for dinner, it was glaringly clear today. I think part of the reason he said yes was that he didn’t want to hurt my feelings,” she added. “The other—major—part was that he’s in love with someone else, and I would rather die than be a homewrecker.”    

“Oh,” you said again. You didn’t know how to respond to that. What did she mean Jeno is in love with someone else? You didn’t dare focus on the last part of what she’d said. You didn’t dare hope that the person she was referring to was you. “Well, I’m sorry it didn’t work out between the two of you. I’m sure you’ll find someone else easily. You’re a delight. Anyone would be lucky to date you.”

Jimin laughed again. “If you weren’t in love with Jeno too, Y/N, I would have thought you were into me.” 

It took a second for the words to register, but when they did, you felt your heart drop to your stomach. Forcing yourself to laugh, you croaked, “Whatever do you mean?” 

Saying that was a mistake. You should not have asked her to elaborate. She was going to make you come to terms with your feelings, and all the time and effort you’d spent denying and trying to get rid of them was going to go down the drain. 

Before she could speak, you made a static sound with your mouth. Then, you pretended that the connection was really bad. “Wha—hear—you. Try—back. Hell—?” 

You hung up before Jimin could call you out on your bullshit. A moment later, you saw a text pop up. 

[jimin]: that was soooo unsubtle  [y/n]: idk what ur talking ab!!!!!!! [jimin]: sure [jimin]: also a tiny heads up [jimin]: i told jeno to stop being a pussy and an asshole so he’s on his way 2 ur place now [y/n]: WHAT THE FUCK [jimin]: i’m going 2 pretend u said thank u [jimin]: don’t forget ab our dinner date tmrw [jimin]: have fun <3 

It was crazy how the bell rang almost immediately after you read the last text. You wondered if the timing was planned and that Jimin had told Jeno to wait till she gave him the go-ahead. 

You trudged to the front door and took a deep breath before opening it.

“Hey,” Jeno mumbled with a small smile. His hair was ruffled, as if he had run his hands through it several times. “Can I come in?” 

Biting the inside of your cheek, you nodded and moved out of the way to make space for him to step inside. He shoved his hands inside the pockets of his jeans and stood awkwardly. 

“You can sit,” you said, feeling the corners of your lips curl up in amusement. 

He sighed and wove his fingers through his strands again. “Not before I apologise for my behaviour. I was completely out of line that day,” he said. “I shouldn’t have said those things. I didn’t mean them.” 

“So you don’t think I’m unattractive?” 

You meant to tease him, but the next thing you knew, he was standing toe-to-toe with you, a desperate and guilt-ridden expression adorning his face. “God, no. You’re the most beautiful person I have ever seen. I only said that because… because I knew it would hurt you.” 

Jeno was standing too close to you. You could barely breathe, much less think. But that didn’t stop you from asking, “Why would you want to hurt me?” 

He didn’t answer for what felt like an entire minute. He only kept staring at you, an internal battle raging inside him. Then, he let loose a breath of frustration and moved away. He refused to look at you, and your patience kept slipping with each moment that passed. 

Right when you thought it would snap, Jeno spoke up, “It hurt me when you said you and I would only ever be friends. I know how stupid it sounds, but it really did. For years, I’d been pining after you and hoping that maybe we could be something more in the future. I felt like an idiot when I realised wouldn’t ever view me in that light. 

“You got so defensive when Chenle said all our friends were suspicious of us being in a secret relationship. I couldn’t help but wonder if you felt disgusted at the idea of us being together. I got angry at myself for being naive and said those horrible things without even realising.” 

You didn’t know what to say. This was the second time you’d been rendered speechless in the past thirty minutes. It was one revelation after the other; you were having a hard time keeping up.

“You—you like me?” you stuttered. 

Jeno laughed humourlessly and looked you dead in the eyes. “I love you, Y/N.” 

“No.” 

“Yes.” 

You took a step back. “No, no, no, no—”

“Yes,” he pressed. “I’m sorry that I do. I know this changes everything, but I couldn’t keep it in anymore. I just—”

“Why would you go out with Jimin if you… if you love me?” you whispered. 

“Partly to see your reaction and partly in an attempt to get over you,” he admitted. “It didn’t work. I just—I just couldn’t stop thinking about you the entire time I was with her. I felt so guilty for saying such terrible things because I couldn’t deal with my emotions and come to terms with reality. I’m really sorry, Y/N.” 

You swallowed the lump in your throat. “I’m sorry too.”

“You don’t have to apologise for not loving me back—”

“That’s not what I’m apologising for,” you interrupted and walked towards him until your abdomens were touching. “I’m apologising for not seeing it sooner. I’m apologising for encouraging Jimin to ask you out even though it killed me. I’m apologising for denying my feelings time and time again. I’m apologising for saying we would only ever be friends. The last thing I want is for our relationship to be platonic.” 

Jeno was barely breathing. “What are you saying?” 

“I’m saying I love you too, Lee Jeno,” you mumbled and stood on your toes, cupping cheeks with your palms. “I’m saying I want you to kiss me.” 

The words didn’t register immediately, but his lips were on yours the moment they did. 

Jeno’s arm snaked around your waist, and he pulled you closer. His hand grabbed your neck from behind, and he tilted his neck to the side, deepening the kiss. 

Your breath hitched in your throat. All you could feel was him. Your nerve-endings were short-circuiting, and pure adrenaline was coursing through your veins. You didn’t think you’d ever been as satisfied and euphoric as you were right now.

Jeno’s lips slotted with yours perfectly. You smiled to yourself upon realising he tasted like chocolates. Your best friend always ate a piece before any event he deemed to be very important. He claimed they gave him good luck. 

Letting go of one of his cheeks, you grabbed the round collar of his shirt and pressed your mouth harder against his. The nights you’d spent wondering how kissing him would feel and then hating yourself immediately for having such thoughts amounted to this. 

You didn’t want to hold back. 

But you had to ask him a question. It didn’t matter how stupid or ridiculous it was; you wanted to know the answer. So, you broke the kiss and inquired with your body still tangled with his, “Why the hell did you agree to watch a rom-com with Jimin?” 

“Really?” he asked exasperatedly. “You wanna talk about Jimin while we’re making out?” 

“I wanna know why you watched a rom-com with her when I’ve been begging you to watch one with me for so long,” you corrected. 

Jeno was silent for a moment, as if contemplating whether or not to tell you. You raised an eyebrow. “Well,” he started, blowing out a breath. “She told me you set her up with me, and it pissed me off even more. I knew she’d tell you all about our date, so I suggested we watch a rom-com. I knew you’d be riled up once you realised.” 

You snorted. Who knew? You weren’t actually being a self-centred narcissist when you suspected the same. “You’re an idiot. I was already riled up you were going out with her.” 

“Oh, yeah?” he teased. “Why’d you encourage her in the first place then?”

“Honestly, at first, I thought I could use you to further my friendship with her,” you admitted. Jeno scoffed in disbelief. “Yeah, I know. That was kinda shitty of me. But when I realised I was falling for you, I pushed her to pursue you in an attempt to convince myself I was not into you. That obviously backfired and did the very opposite. I was horribly miserable. I wanted to shoot myself everytime I heard her gush about you.” 

He smirked. “She gushed about me?” 

“Oh, get over yourself.” You shoved his shoulder playfully. “How’d you end up here after your date? Jimin texted me that you were coming.”

“Tough, but I’ll try.” He laughed. “She was probably able to tell how disinterested I was. After the date when I dropped her home and hugged her instead of kissing her, she just confronted me and asked if I was in love with you. Then told me to not bother answering because it was obvious. She said she didn’t want to get in the middle of us and threatened to kick my ass if I didn’t come here to make amends immediately.” 

You grinned. “Oh, the things I would have done to witness that scene.” 

“It was scary.” Jeno frowned. “She hit my shoulder really hard when I said I was in love with you and called me an idiot for going out with her. I think she was angry at herself too for being oblivious to our situationship. It was one of the weirdest dates I’ve ever been on.” 

“Jimin actually said she had a great time with you. She told me it was nice.”

“Really?” he asked, sounding surprised. 

You placed a chaste kiss on Jeno’s mouth. “Hmm, I wonder how good the best date you’ve ever been on would be then.” 

He chased your lips and kissed you back deeply. Caressing your cheekbone with stars twinkling in his eyes, Jeno said, “I guess we’ll know when I take you out.”

“No way, are you officially asking me out on a date, Lee Jeno?” you asked, and let out a fake gasp. 

“Damn right I am,” he declared. “I don’t want the amusement park trip with our friends to be our first day out as a couple. Do you wanna grab some food tomorrow afternoon? We can go to the trampoline park before that.” 

You smiled softly. “That sounds wonderful. But,” you added. “No more flirting with restaurant staff for free food, or I’ll go ballistic on you.” 

Jeno laughed, and you thought it was the most beuatiful sound you had ever heard. His chest rumbled with the force of it, his eyes creasing to look like small crescent moons. Slipping his hand into yours, he squeezed once. 

“Wouldn’t even dream of it.” 

note: THANK U FOR READING TILL THE END WHAT ??? loads of hugs and kisses :’)) also i know i said this before but posting after a rlly long time has lowkey made me anxious LOLL i think i could have done better with the fic esp the end bc it’s a little rushed. honestly speaking i am ready to move on to my next wip and i don’t wanna spend more time rewriting this one :(( i still love this piece though and i would definitely love to hear your thoughts amigos!! stay healthy and hydrated <33

thank you to mira for coming in clutch and helping me out with the plot when i was stuck + giving me her honest opinion! thank you to dori too for reading parts of this fic and giving me her opinion as well! i love you both :D

taglist: @notbeforelong​ @w3bqrl​ @rikiflowers​ @mochisnlix​ @allorysayshi​ @hiqhkey​ @angel-hyuckie​​ @j4kesworld​ @timetoten​ @vantxx95​ @sweetjaemss​​ @ahnneyong​ @jennaissantes @sunshine-skz​ @baekhyunstruly​ @ja4hyvn​ @ily-cuz-i​​ @kdyism​ @keemburley @n0hyuck @luvenshiti @donutswithjaminthemiddle @mosviqu @deobitiful @jeonnyread @pjofics @venusprada @matchahyuck @tbzussy @babyksworld @bockhyun @rbf-aceu @ablackbtsstan @tamakofever @naemakkuri @sadgirlroo @fariylixie0915 @pradagukkie @babyjenono @hibernatinghamster @jaemnationnn @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @carelessshootanonymous @nctzennikki09

[barleyo]

Love Machine.

Android! Leon Kennedy X Fem! Reader (smut)

A/N: I got this idea while listening to a song with the same title. This was my first time writing for Leon, I hope it isn't too clunky or too short! I am slowly coming out of my hiatus, so my writing skills are a bit rusty, I need you all to give me a little grace for the next few posts in case they aren't great LOL. Love you all so much, thanks for your support!

Part Two: Here

Wordcount: 2.4K

Tags: sex doll/living sex robot (?), sex toys, oral (fem receiving), reader is called things like "pretty girl", p in v, creampie (but not really because he's a sex doll??), unprotected sex, fingering, nipple play

“Welcome in, can I help you find anything?”

(Y/N) gave the cashier a polite smile and shook her head as she walked past him at the check-out desk, trying to be as non-awkward as possible, especially since she was the only customer in the small store at that time of night. It was an in and out trip, she tried to convince herself of that. She needed something small, just enough to get the job done. 

Normally, she would’ve waited until the next day to run an errand like this, but days of stress had left her needy and frustrated, so when her trusty wand finally gave out on her mid-fun, she grabbed her car keys and headed out into the night. 

Her eyes scanned the wall of toys in the back of the store. Pink and purple covered the shelves, vibrating toys and dildos being her main focus. 

“Mini-vibe, bullet vibe,” she mumbled, squatting down to read the boxes on the lower shelves. “What’s even the difference–?”

She settled on a purple rabbit vibrator. Its packaging was the least indicative of its contents, and it was on the smaller side. Easy to hide. 

“Will that be all?” the cashier asked, looking over the box. 

“Yeah, that should be it.”

“You know,” he said, giving her a wide grin, “I can’t say I can suggest this one.” He held the box back out to her, waiting for her to take it. “We’ve gotten a lot of refunded purchases due to it.”

“Oh, shit, really?” (Y/N) took the box back, tucking it under her arm. “Okay, uh, I guess I should ask what the best option would be, then?”

The cashier gave a nod and waved her over, lifting the divider between behind the counter and the rest of the store. “Come with me to the back, we’ve got all the good stuff tucked away back there.”

She chewed the inside of her cheek, thinking about whether or not to follow him. She didn’t immediately catch any red flags in his behavior: he was polite enough, no major creep-vibes. (Y/N) finally walked past the open divider and followed him into the stock room. 

“So, over here,” he said, waving his hand over a heavily stocked shelf, “is all the high-powered stuff. These over here have a high-customization level, lingerie over here, and over here ....” 

The man continued to go over the ‘hidden’ options in the store, but (Y/N)’s eyes traveled over to a large, sheet-covered box. 

“Hey, what’s that over there?” she asked, pointing at the box. 

“Oh, that? That’s new, uhm, probably a little out of your comfort zone, though, he’s a little advanced.”

“He?”

The cashier sighed and stepped up to the box, gripping the corner of the sheet. “It’s—it’s a long story, but, here, have a look.”

He pulled the sheet down, dropping it to the cement floors of the room.

“What the fuck is that?!”

A blond man stood in the plain box, the only adornment on the cardboard being his name in bolded letters: Leon. His eyes were closed, his hands sat idly beside his sides, and his body stood bare before them both.

“His name is Leon, he’s a prototype for a new line of responsive sex dolls. I mean, most of the bugs are out of the system, he’s not faulty or anything.”

(Y/N) walked up to the box and scratched the cellophane covering, trying to get his attention. “Is he awake? Or on, I guess?”

“Nah, he has to be set up, there’s a manual in the box, I think,” the man replied, bending down to pick the sheet back up to throw over Leon’s box. Just as he began to shake the sheet off, clearing the residual dirt off of it, (Y/N) spoke again.

“How much for him?”

She mentally smacked herself for asking. There was no doubt he was expensive, hell, he probably wasn’t even up for sale.

“You want him?” He raised his eyebrow, looking the girl up and down, confusion painting his features.

“I– I don’t know, can I have him? How much?”

He crossed his arms for a moment, thinking. “He’s not for sale, per se, but– so, listen, okay?”

“Yeah?”

“You can have him for free, okay? But if you aren’t satisfied with him, you can’t bring him back here, you’re stuck with ‘em.” He held his hand out expectantly. “Deal?”

“Deal,” she said, taking his hand quickly, giving it a few affirming shakes.

The boxcutter in her hand worked quickly, slicing open the cellophane. (Y/N) bunched up the plastic and threw it to a random corner in her bedroom, turning back to face Leon. She gave him a testing poke, and when he didn’t respond she turned that poke into a gentle tapping on the side of his face.

“Leon?” The name felt like acid on her tongue, guilt already creeping through her. “Wake up.”

She dropped her hand from his face and guided it further down his chest. The synthetic skin felt real, almost in an uncanny way. He was warm to the touch, not plastic-y and cold like how she assumed other sex dolls felt. 

“Come on, big boy.” she muttered, pulling Leon’s large, heavy body out of the box and placing him on his feet near her bed. “Where’s your–? Oh, got it.” (Y/N) snatched the instruction manual from the box. The print was foggy, and some words were horribly misspelled, but she flipped through the pages and located the directions page. She read the page to herself quietly. “I am Leon, your AI-powered male sex doll. The setup process of a Leon doll is extremely easy. To turn me on, just set my dial. After that, just sit back and let me love you for a little while!” 

(Y/N) walked a small circle around him in search of his ‘on-switch.’ She found it right on the back of his neck, almost hidden by his swoop of blond hair. On the silver dial sat three options: Off, gentle, and rough. A hand rose and ticked the dial to gentle. She stepped away from him quickly after hitting the switch, nervous to see what would happen.

His eyes opened slowly, and a weak blue light beamed from them, scanning outwards before shutting off completely. A grin slowly spread across Leon’s all-too-real features as he powered on. 

“Hey there, pretty girl,” he said, standing still in her room, only moving his head to face her. “Looks like you could use some company.”

“Uh, hello.” Her mouth was dry as she spoke, feeling like she made a bad decision the second he had snapped to life. 

“Hm, why don’t you come closer to me? I don’t bite,” Leon paused before cheekily adding “unless you want me to.” He took her in his arms and let his eyes drift down her body. He eased her shirt over her head and tried to undo the clasps of her bra.

“What are you doing?” She tried to pull away but he held her in place.

“You have all your clothes, but I’m exposed over here. That’s not so fair, is it?” He looked down at his hardened length, ushering her to look down with him.

Her eyes widened a bit. “When did you even get hard–?”

“I’m always hard around pretty girls like you.” He slipped off her bra and groped her breasts with his large, somewhat calloused hands. “Look at these, baby. You have pretty tits, and a pretty face, huh?” 

A hum left her throat as she felt his head dip down and take one of her swollen nipples into his mouth. He swirled his tongue over the bud, latching on to properly suck it after a few teasing moments. She ran her hands through his hair and gripped onto it tightly, whining at the feeling of his mouth popping off of her tit. 

“Bet you’re getting wet from this, aren’t you?” His voice was airy and muffled while he spoke. He left open mouthed licks over her pebbled nipples, grazing over them with his tongue’s warmth.

She gave a weak nod in return.

“Mm, maybe I should take care of that,” he chuckled lightly and lowered himself to his knees. “Gonna let me take these off you?” He tugged at the waistband of her shorts.

“G’head,” (Y/N) said, feeling her thighs rub against each other impatiently. 

He pulled them down to her ankles and she stepped out of them, leaving her in just her panties. She shuddered at the feeling of his tongue darting across the cotton covering her wet center. Again, Leon laughed a bit at her reaction and licked a heavier stripe against the fabric. When he was rewarded with a gasp from her open mouth, he pulled the panties to the side and pressed his tongue at her slit.

“F–Fuck, that feels good,” she whined, hand still messily buried in his hair. 

Leon kept his eyes on her the whole time, not letting a moment pass where his blue irises weren’t piercing hers. 

His tongue dipped out of her entrance and moved up to her clit. He fidgeted with it, trying to see which motion worked best on her, and settled on a circular movement. The longer he sat slotted between her thighs, her knees thrown over his shoulders, the more frequently he felt her cunt jump from pleasure. He placed his tongue hard on her clit, giving it rough, pressured licks. 

“Almost there, I’m close,” (Y/N) said, feeling a coil form in her stomach. She had felt this with other toys, but by far, Leon was the best at the job. “Don’t stop,” she hummed, voice catching in her throat while he moved his head side to side, dragging his mouth sloppily over her cunt.

A string of profanities escaped her mouth when she felt her orgasm hit. A sputtering wave of warmth flushed through her body, her pussy clenching around nothing. 

“That’s it, good job,” Leon cooed. He held his hand up to her face expectantly. “Spit.”

Her mind already felt melted, like it could’ve oozed out of her brain at any minute. She mindlessly complied with him, spitting onto his lengthy fingers.

“Ah–! S’too much, Leon.”

“No, no, you can take it. I’ll be gentle, I know you want another one,” he said with a slightly mocking tone. “Greedy girl needs something to fill her up.” Plunging his fingers into her pussy, he groaned at the feeling of her slick walls still fluttering. “Y’haven’t even recovered from the first one, but I’m gonna give you another one,” he said, curling his fingers, “gonna be twice as strong.”

“Fuck, it’s too much,” (Y/N) knew her sobs of pleasure were pathetic sounding, but she couldn’t muster anything else up as she tried to push his wrist down and away, not being able to stand the feeling of his two fingers prodding at her most sensitive spot. 

“Don’t fight it,” he warned, “not when you’re so close. Yeah, I feel you getting all tight on me. Mm, you’re gonna love how it feels, it only gets better from here, pretty girl.” 

Leon became more aggressive with his movement, moving his whole arm as his fingers jammed in and out of her. (Y/N) was lost in her ecstasy. Her hands shook and flew aimlessly before taking purchase of Leon’s shoulders and holding onto them, nails digging into the skin.

Her second release, as promised, was much stronger. Her legs clamped around him, her moans came out in long, shaky intervals, and her brain was mush. She couldn’t force herself to focus on anything but the cum dripping out of her cunt and down Leon’s fingers and forearm. She screwed her eyes shut, feeling even the dim light of her bedroom to be too much for her now fucked-out, slutty head to handle. 

She hardly noticed when he had placed on her back in the bed with her legs spread. Not until he guided his cock across her folds, tapping the head of it against her swollen, abused clit. 

“More?” she asked, voice breaking and weak. “Can’t take it ‘nymore.”

“C’mon, sweet thing, you can give me one more, can’t you? Just one more?” He whispered into her ear, slowly pushing into her, holding himself back. 

“Jus’ one? No more after that?”

“Mhm, just one.” Leon bottomed out and stretched her walls with his girth. The tip of his cock gave sweet, shallow kisses to her cervix’s tip, gently pressing into it with each thrust. His hips rocked into her, but he felt his dick being forced out of her walls, pushed out of her heat. “Even after all that, still tight f’me.” He slid back in, rougher this time, trying to keep himself inside. “Need somethin’ to stretch you out, baby. Good thing y’got me now.”

His hands were placed under her knees, scooping and holding them apart while he fucked her. He slowly transitioned from fucking and burrying his cock into her, to bringing her body forward, bouncing her on his cock. 

“Leon—”

“Hush, now, you’re okay. Mm,” he wiped the drool from the corner of her mouth, “look at how you take it. It’s like you were made to be used like this, sweet girl. Maybe you’d be better off as a toy.” 

She moaned at this, feeling her cunt twitch at his words.

“Yeah? You like that?” Leon’s eyebrow raised at her a bit, teeth barring in smirk. “You like being a little toy. Being– oh, fuck, you’re enjoying this so much. Your pretty little face...”

(Y/N) threw her arms over his neck, pulling him closer to her body. Their chests pressed together, her sweat slick between them both. “God, Leon, please!”

Leon pressed his mouth on her to quiet her down, swallowing her moans as their tongues and teeth gnashed against each other. He winced as (Y/N) bit down on his lip, choking back her sobs when she clamped down on his cock. Taking this as a sign, Leon emptied his thick, synthetic cum into her. 

Once he pulled out, a mixture of both of their cum pumped out, gushing and wetting in between her thighs.

“Good job, baby,” he said, stroking her face, grinning at the warmth of her cheek. “You did so well, getting all cockdrunk for me. To think I was being gentle. Wanna try my rough mode out for size?” He joked, letting his hand grip her hip. 

“Goodnight, Leon,” she responded, unimpressed at his teasing and tired from what he had done to her. She brought her hand to the back of his neck and turned his dial to ‘off.'

[oolhan]

our little games

Wordcount: 1.7k

| Post-mockingjay. Peeta and Katniss making up their own guessing game with pastries that he brings home every night from the bakery |

No warnings! It’s literally a fluff fest following my realization about what Peeta and Katniss smells here and @mollywog’s replies conceiving a sudden birth of this prompt. Lol. This is my first time writing for everlark and I kid you not I oiled up my rusty writing skills from lit classes. Thanks also for @distractionsfromthefood for your support! Unbeta-ed, but enjoy!

It started when I came home early from the bakery, surprised to find Katniss curled on the couch covered with her oversized hunting jacket. She looked up from the arm rest and her cheeks were red and dry with tears. Nothing surprising, honestly, it’s just one of those days. I automatically walked up and knelt on her side, forgetting to take my shoes off in the foyer.

“Who is it this time?” I hushed, giving attention to her black strands clinging dry on her cheeks, softly flinging them aside while her head rested on the arm rest.

“Dad…”

“In the woods?” I glanced at her father’s hunting jacket she used as a blanket and carefully move it to wipe her tears, tucking its collar under her chin.

“No, couldn’t get past the door…”

“Okay, do you want to stand up now?”

“No…” A silence.

“Stay with me though?” Ah. There it is. Yeah, alright. Always.

She scooted on the couch to give me space and I obliged, lying down cramped with my shoes still on, faces inches from one another.

“What do you want for dinner?” I whispered, caressing her brow with my thumb. I’ll never get tired brushing her face this way.

She scoffed a smile. “Pancakes?”

“Pancakes?” my eyebrows shot up. Pancakes for dinner?

“Yeah, you smell like maple,” she chuckled, her eye wrinkles right under my thumb.

“Probably because of the maple butterscotch brownies I made for Sae’s granddaughter today,” I murmured, tracing lines on her nose. “She said she didn’t know what maple tastes like,”

“That’s so Peeta of you to do,” she grumbled, mustering all seriousness with her brows. That made me snort.

“Yeah, well.”

“I want those butterscotch stuff now.”

My smile got wider.

----

The next day, I set aside some of the cupcakes I frosted for the seamstress’s kid’s birthday to bring home for Katniss. I never got to take my shoes off when she wrapped her arms around my neck, her face on my chest, the boxed sweets held on my free arm as I put the other over her.

“Hello, again,” I say, giving her a kiss after leaning back. “I’ve got you something,”

I hid the blue box behind me, smirking at her head tilting in curiosity. “You have to guess it first!” I played.

“Is it food?”

“Mhm.”

“Cheese buns?”

“No, I just made those for you two days ago.” I chimed. Her and her obsession with cheese buns.

“Those butterscotch brownies?”

“Unfortunately sold out,”

“Wait,” She reached for the front of my jacket, sniffing it. Then she’s whiffing off my undershirt, my hands, my chest, my neck. I tried not to shiver when her nose pressed under my earlobe.

“Buttercream…”

I tried not to grin.

“Cupcakes?” She eagerly tugged on my jacket.

“Oh, Katniss,” I chuckled, presenting the box wrapped with a simple red bow. She unties it and quickly picks the one with green frosting.

“This would be dessert after venison!”

----

After that, I practically came home everyday bearing random pastries for her to guess. I never get my shoes off in the foyer when she hauls herself on me and give my daily hugs.

“Ooh, something creamy today,” she quipped, leaning back from my undershirt. “Is it a cake?”

“Not even close.”

“Tarts?”

I shake my head.

“Something with custard?”

“Probably.”

“Custard pie?”

“Warmer,”

“Egg pie?”

“Warmerrr,”

“Ice cream? Vanilla cake with cream frosting?” She tugs on my jacket repeatedly, almost shaking me to give up my answer.

“Sweetheart, you’re cold again.” I tried not to laugh at her growing impatience when strands from her braid fell on her face, the box still unreachable behind me, and my free arm curling those anrgy locks between my fingers. Her eyebrows are beginning to crease the way they do when she gets close enough to Haymitch’s geese.

“What is it, Mellark?” Oh, I love nothing more than seeing her scowl.

“Guess, Everdeen. Or I’ll eat this alone after din—” She cut off with a grasp on my head and a kiss on tiptoes.

“Tell me now, Mellark!”

“That’s coercion!” I teased. She leaned up for more pecks, but I backed away chuckling.

“Peeta!”

“Alright, let’s make a deal. Guess this right with three tries, or give me a kiss every time you bite to it.” I challenged, plastering an impish grin.

“How am I supposed to guess it? All pastries have cream!” Her eyebrows are close to meeting now.

“Oh yes, minced meat pie is creamy.”

“Is it minced meat pie?”

“No, it’s not savory.” I clued in, getting impatient myself. I didn’t even take my shoes and jacket off and we’ve been playing this guessing game for minutes now.

Just pick the latter and let me kiss you.

She crossed her arms playfully, “Screw you, Mellark. I’ll take the second option just because dinner is getting cold. Now give it.”

“Groundbreaking choice.” I thumbed her annoyed forehead and unraveled her angry arms, revealing the box from behind and untying the red ribbon.

Her creases came back when she saw the hidden pastry.

“How is bread pudding close to a pie?!” She exclaimed, all angry tone and yet she’s pinching off a piece from the pudding. I made some batches up from the stale ones.

She bites through the pinched bread. I took the first peck.

----

It became a routine. Coming home at dusk. Stomping my shoes on the foyer. Her arms clinging briefly, nose sniffing, her guessing every item right, a peck on the lips, a dinner and a dessert.

“You smell dill and garlic today,”

“Did it cling that strong?”

“Doesn’t matter. I like it, it’s soft, like a little savory treat.” She murmured in my ear, rendering me still when she softly nipped my earlobe.

She never does that.

Her arm swooped under my elbow, taking the blue box from my hands and revealing a bed of focaccia sprinkled with dills. “Hmmm,” she moaned through her bites and I fought the urge to kiss that crumb off on the side of her mouth.

Is she trying to kill me?

I coughed, brushing off her innuendos and finally taking my shoes off.

----

Assuming her favorite days were cinnamon and buttercream, she does more than just short kisses whenever those days come. The soft bites on my neck and earlobes happens only when I come home smelling like it. That’s the time I sink down my fingers in her hair a little deeper or my hands grip her hips a little tighter.

Today, I grasp her braid a little stronger, my arm roping around her backside, giving her neck some nips of my own. I breathed her in, taking a whiff of her own scent—woods, sweat, something feminine, and entirely Katniss—wishing I could store away some of her in this manner, freezing this moment. I let her lift my head and kiss me senseless, mouths meeting, tongues twirling.

“I, uh, frosted someone’s wedding cake today,” Taking a peck on her nose, I tried to catch my breath when we break away.

“requested something with cinnamon and buttercream frosting,” I sighed, brushing off her brow, noticing her now diluted eyes. I failed to bring anything home because of those three tiers.

“Good for them,” she breathed.

“Couldn’t bring home anything,”

“Good for me,” She gulped and collided our mouths again. She took my shoes off along with my jacket. Dinner got cold that night.

---

Fall had a slow welcome. It was a seasonably cold day when she doesn’t push herself to me after I opened the front door. Disappointed, I took off my shoes and head to the living room, finding her standing up from near the fireplace when she noticed me. Our memory book laying on the carpet along with some papers.

“Hey you,” her cold form wraps around mine and I tried not to ask her what’s wrong too quickly.

“Guess?” I quipped, pecking her red cheeks. Did she just come back from outside?

“Butter cookies?” even with her wavering tone, she was right. Although I don’t point out the way she hid a small choke when she hugged me.

“You okay?” I let out warm breath on my palms, placing them on either side of her face and this time I felt her visibly holding her breath, her nose scrunching. “What’s wrong? Who is it this time?”

“No, no episodes. I just… I was nauseous the whole afternoon and tried to walk it out. I think I just miss them,”

“Hm. Come here, let’s warm up,” I led her to the fireplace and sat down together, the memory book lay open in front of us.

“Actually Peeta, I think I’ll prepare dinner.” She suddenly stood up, giving me a kiss on the forehead before heading to the kitchen. That was uncharacteristic of her.

But I didn’t question it. Not yet.

I started to wonder when she doesn’t meet me in the foyer anymore. Our guessing game slowly turned from minute hugs to silent smiles. It was when I brought home some seasonal apple pie that she couldn’t hold back a gag when she tried to hug me.

Doesn't she like apples? Can’t I recall if she hated apples?

“God I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to gag at all. I just, I don’t know, it just smells sour.”

“I baked them fresh this morning so they’re likely not foul. But yeah, okay, I’ll just drop these off to Haymitch—”

“No, Peeta, your hands. They smell so apple-y.” Her expression was a twist of scowling and being disgusted. I sliced dozens of apples today so the scent clung too much even when I washed off with some soap.

“Sweetheart, we chopped all day at the bakery, the smell will last for some hours I think,”

“I’m sorry, I don’t know why, I always liked apples,”

“It’s okay, let me give these to Haymitch and then I’ll scrub off in the shower.”

----

The next day I brought home some of the extra orange cake slices, dreading she’ll also hate these.

They were never put down on the table.

She devoured three slices in minutes.

Also gobbled my orange scented fingers.

----

Still mildly unhappy we didn’t return to our guessing games after a week, I didn’t bring anything with me today. I was taking my shoes off when I saw her beaming by the couch, her face tinted red with anticipation and she looks like she’s about to cry.

“What? What is it?” I rushed to her in my loose shoes and jacket still on.

“Peeta, I think I know why.”

Eyebrows crinkled. My hands on her elbows.

"You know I always love what you make but...

Her fingers fidgeting. Her blushing cheeks and silver stare the only things registering in my mind.

“I think I’m pregnant.”

She guessed right.

[13eyond13]

hello — do you have any death note fic recs that occur in the canon universe? they don’t necessarily need to be canon compliant, and i’d specifically prefer gen or lawlight. thank you so much :) your blog’s really fun to scroll through whilst putting off doing assignments

Aw, thank you anon! I quite like scrolling through my own blog too lol

And you got it, pal. I'd say it's about time I dust off my rusty fic recommending skills (I haven't been reading fanfiction regularly since probably about 2018, so these recs are not going to be the newest of the new, jsyk)...

Also, I'm ASSUMING this is the same anon who asked recently for fics a bit similar to

(X) Nights - youremyqueen [E, 400k+ words] L imprisons Light and then Light imprisons L and then L imprisons Light again. Sometimes they have sex, too.

? If not please forgive me, because I also used that as a guide when picking out these recs.

Also most of these recs are explicit and many of them are dark, so please check the tags and content warnings on the fics before reading them, just in case there's anything listed there that might be a dealbreaker for you! Should go without saying, but it's entirely on YOU if you end up reading something you're not comfortable with linked here, dear reader(s)...

--

CANON UNIVERSE + LAWLIGHT FIC RECS

SOME YOTSUBA ARC PWP ONE-SHOTS:

(X) Slap Fight - Shipaholic [E, 2k words] L makes a request. It gets out of hand. -(the girls are fiiiiighting...) (X) Love is an Open Door in My Ass - Shipaholic [E, 4k words] Matsuda gets very excited about an email forward. The task force despairs. -(technically meant to be taking place in the dramaverse, but you can easily imagine it as the anime/manga characters too. Rough sex but done with a lighter/softer tone) (X) Losing - Twyd [E, 2k words] L knows what losing feels like. -(depression!L is having a bit of a bad time... this writer makes L so quiet and sad and cute, and even though that's not often my cup of tea I still love everything they write) (X) Tresemme - Twyd [M, 2k words] L x Light slash. Set when they are handcuffed. Light just wishes L would dry his hair properly. He takes matters into his own hands. -(understated bittersweet fluff-smut) (X) Brilliant Bodies Disintegrate - Tartpants [E, 5k words] "L gives Light flesh made fact. L is the wayward flock for him to tend -- he’s Lucifer, the dawn-bringer, delivering light back to Light. Put bluntly, L’s the one who keeps shit interesting." -(L keeps being a big ho and making Light jealous on purpose to goad him into some rough sex-having, basically? Good if you liked that aspect of Nights...) (X)Trash Note - Tartpants [E, 3k words] "The character whose name is written in this note shall obey the writer’s every trash whim, no matter how out-of-character, preposterous, unsavory, carnal, humiliating, or cracktastic." -(if you ever want some goofy handcuffs smut that isn't taking itself too seriously at some point...)

SOME LONGER CANON UNIVERSE + LAWLIGHT FICS:

(X) Coexistence is Boredom - Sakurazukamori6 [M, 232k words] A new deathnote. A new plan for world sanctity. And an entirely misled Catholic clergy. Raito and L take their respective places on the sides of their own justice. A final battle waged in the Garden of Eden. -(This was my very fave Lawlight fic back in the 2000s, and a lot of it still holds up for me now and has a very special place in my heart even though it never actually got finished. I just love how L and Light and all the other characters are written in it, and appreciate that it can be angsty and suspenseful while still being funny and kinda lighter in tone for a canon universe Lawlight fic - it frequently makes me lol when I'm reading it. From what I remember it was the first fic that convinced me they'd potentially make a good couple beyond just unresolved sexual tension, too) (X) The Lies of Light Yagami - Kildeer [E, 38k words] “You’re pretty good Light, but I don’t see how you could hurt someone more with love than with death.” It was Light’s turn to smile as he leaned back in his chair. “Well then Ryuk, prepare yourself for a good show.” -(a bunch of missing scenes from the canon storyline, mostly smut. Very angsty and well done) (X) A Tithe to Hell - Aja [E, 34k words] Light has thirteen days to find out how it will feel--not just to kill, but to destroy. -(considered a fandom classic. I remember finding it intense and well-written, and that it also has a few interesting twists and turns) (X) Between the Black and White - Serria [M, 103k words] When L captures Light, he finds himself unwilling to relinquish his kindred spirit to the police, and instead has other plans to make Kira atone for his crimes. But the saga of Shinigami, genius intellect and old memories - BB - has only just begun. -(I haven't read it since it was new, and I don't think it ever got finished, but I remember this one being my fave of Serria's fics back in the day when I was a very fussy reader and only wanted to read fics set in the canon universe. Serria wrote a lot of great early Lawlight fics, and was my first friend in the fandom back in 2008 as well!) (X) A Cure for Love - halfpromise [M, 230k words] Light and L fall in love during the Yotsuba arc and Light's master plan is derailed when an assassin steals the Death Note. The threat of Kira is dwarfed when Kira's powers seem to have fallen into the hands of a terrorist organization known as Astraea and Light and L are united to find the culprit, but for how long... -(you've heard of the legendary Hinterland Doctrine fic series, now get ready for what I believe is halfpromise's very first fic? I don't think I actually read this whole thing so I don't know if it's finished, but I remember finding it fun to read her take on the canon characters too, and that what I did read had a pretty interesting plot and at times was quite funny as well)

[yan-lorkai]

Good afternoon, Lorkai! I’d like to know your thoughts on how some of the twst boys would handle a darling that used to be a musician? If it’s alright, I’ll leave the choice of boys up to who ever you feel most inspired to write for. Thank you for all of the great yandere content!

*･゜ﾟ Characters: Lilia V, Kalim A, Epel F.

*･゜ﾟ A/N: I just remembered when I finished writing that the octotrio had a band in middle school lol so, maybe if someone wants to read ofc, this fic can have a part two. Also thank u darling, I'm glad that you like my content 🥺❤️

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Oh, you used to be a musician? If you're comfortable with that, Lilia would love to hear you play and maybe even have a duet with you, following every chord and note with his guitar. Sometimes, you can even hear him humming the song you play softly and the sound is very harmonious.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ However, 'used' is past tense and indicates that you no longer play / are no longer a musician. And Lilia builds a thousand and one theories and invents explanations for it, eventually he voices his thoughts and asks you why you don't play anymore. If it's insecurity or lack of motivation he can help you overcome them, he can even help build your confidence again. Lilia would offer words of encouragement and and help you put together a schedule to practice. He would remind you that your love for music is valid and that it's never too late to pursue your passion again, as an immortal he knows true talent when he see it.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Also he's like your number one fan, the kind of fan who buys all your CDs and merchandise.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ But if it's because you don't like playing anymore / want to pursue another profession, Lilia respects your decision. He still wants to play with you sometimes and he would love to hear if you have any compositions of your own, he would have heart for eyes while listening to you and probably was going to brag to anyone about how his lover is such an amazing musician.

⠀⠀⠀

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Kalim, sweet Kalim, when you tell him you used to be a musician he wants to know absolutely everything. He wanted to know what kind of instruments you played, if you sang, if you've composed any music, if you've played in front of a giant audience, how you got interested in music, how you became a musician, things like that.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Music for him is a way of expressing yourself and he would love to hear what kind of music you play. He would shout your name and clap and cheer you on if you played, but if you decide not to play that's fine you can just enjoy the good food and the time you spend together at his parties.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ He would love for you to stop by the Music Club sometimes to watch him rehearse and play, and if you know how to play the drums, he would like to exchange tips and tricks on how to play better. And he would use every tip and trick to improve and play his hometown songs for you, hoping you would feel the same as him, light and happy following the upbeat rhythm.

⠀⠀⠀

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Epel, like Kalim, would ask so many questions about your journey as a musician, about your experiences, challenges that you faced, and what initially drew you to music. He like to hear it all while you guys run errands or spend time together. If you doubt about your skills though, he's already proclaiming how talented you are and how he loves you for trying something and being so good at it.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ He doesn't play any instruments but he is more than happy to see how you take care of yours, supporting you if you want to try playing again and are a little rusty. Epel could take you to Pomefiore where lots of students sharp their skills by practicing to expand your horizons, to show you something new while you listen to them play. And he's sure Vil wouldn't have a problem letting you practice with them since you used to be a musician.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Epel doesn't know if this helps you, but he would massage your hands and shoulders after you play trying to make you relax and get rid of tension. He would tell you whenever you have talent and absolutely love to hear you play, and if you ever want to return to your career as a musician, know that he will be by your side to support and help you in any way he can.

[sapphires-and-silver-linings]

Half-Life | Chapter Two

He didn’t know what to make of you.

Pairing: Plaga!Leon S. Kennedy/F!Chubby!Paranormal Investigator!Reader

Tags: Fluff, Mutual Pining, Angst, Body Horror

Notes: Here's chapter two! This was a lot of fun to write! I hope you guys like the banter and interactions as much as I enjoyed writing them lol. I think our little monster Leon is so cute in this. Please leave a comment if you can! would love to know your thoughts!

Masterlist | Previous | Next

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“Wow… that’s… good?” you told him, lying through your teeth, thinking about how you got yourself into this predicament.

Leon had ushered you down the winding path of the village outskirts, the two of you trying to maneuver around a pervasive awkward silence after your initial meeting.

When Leon wasn’t actively trying to intimidate you, he was reserved. Almost… shy?

To break the tension, you had asked if he invited all of his visitors home.

His reply?

“Just the pretty ones.”

You laughed at that, rolling your eyes, and he rubbed the back of his neck with a chuckle before growing more serious.

“This is the first time in a decade I’ve actually talked to someone. Most people… run away before they start asking questions.” His eyes shifted over to you as he added, “As they should. You’re a special case, apparently.”

You scoffed. “You scare them away, though. On purpose. Not my fault I saw through it.”

“Well, it’s for their own good. And my peace of mind. You really managed to catch me off guard.” 

“It’s a skill few possess,” you replied with a teasing grin.

He clicked his tongue in response before leading you up to a house with large front double doors. “Home sweet home.”

You released your hold on his arm, watching as he opened them and swept his hand forward, offering to let you walk in first. 

What a gentlemonster, you joked to yourself.

You nodded and made your way inside, sliding your backpack off your shoulders and setting it down against the wall before taking in the decently sized space. It was pretty nice, though bare of decorations and a bit worn. Must be great not having to pay rent.

“Mi casa es su casa,” he told you, closing the doors.

Shutting out the day, you came to realize just how dark the place was. Even the windows did little to aid your sight, as the sun was beginning to set. 

“Uh, Leon?”

“Yeah?”

Those glowing red eyes were trained on you, even more pronounced in the shaded room. “Is there a light in this place? Or do you just… live like this?”

“Shit,” he hissed, breezing past you to a cabinet and pulling out an array of white candles and a box of matches, setting them on the dining table in front of you. “Yeah, I can kinda… see in the dark.”

He opened the small box and tried to carefully pluck a match from inside, struggling to gain purchase with his claws on the tiny wooden handle.

“Let me,” you offered, gently tugging out his hand and grabbing a match. “And night vision, huh? That sounds useful.”

He seemed genuinely shocked by the action, eyes widened slightly, before clearing his throat and taking a step back to let you strike the match and light the surrounding candles. “Uh, yeah. Guess so.”

Once the wicks were lit, covering the room in a soft yellow glow, you gave him a smile. “So, you were saying about dinner?”

“Right, I’ll get on that. Sit tight.”

That was an hour ago.

And now you sat with a plate in front of you, just finished with chewing a tentative forkful of the charred hunk of meat placed there.

You watched Leon eat his own in a couple bites, simultaneously uneased by the way his sharp teeth shredded the morsel to bits in mere seconds, and fascinated.

Leon pulled a face as he swallowed, sighing deeply. “No need to lie. That was awful.”

“Sorry. I really tried to like it,” you said with an awkward laugh.

“Don’t be. I’m a little rusty in the kitchen. Been a long time since I’ve had company for dinner, you can imagine.” He shrugged. “And if I’m being honest, even as a human, I was never really good at cooking. Much harder with these.”

He held out his large hands, and you stared at the black claws that seemed to extend straight from his fingertips, their edges like daggers. Your gaze remained on them for a few moments before you rose it back to his face.

“I’m guessing you eat your meat raw, then?” 

His eyes flicked away from you and he seemed almost ashamed. “Yeah. I didn’t, at first. Tried to keep up with cooking. But I found it easier—and tastier—to eat it… fresh. I’m not human anymore and it’s not like it can make me sick. Nothing can, actually.”

“Ah. And how does one… find that out?” you knew the answer would unsettle you but asked him anyway. It must have been morbid curiosity that drove you.

He looked uncomfortable at your questioning, and you saw his tail swish almost irritably behind him on the stool he sat upon. “I’m not sure you want to know.”

You bit your lip, feeling guilty for your nosiness. “I’m sorry. You don’t have to tell me. But I won’t judge you for it.”

He let out a humorless laugh. “You’d be smarter if you did. You just met me, after all. Who's to say I didn’t lure you here to eat you because I like to toy with my food?” 

“What are you, the big bad wolf?” you taunted, unconvinced. 

He leaned forward across the table, a long tongue sliding against his fangs as he stared you down, replying in a low voice that sent a shiver up your spine, “I could be. Don’t forget you can always start running, little rabbit.”

You swallowed, trying to keep the nerves that twisted in your gut at bay. “I reiterate, no one has gone missing here in ten years. You’re not munching on anybody.”

“No one who’s been reported. You’d be surprised how many drifters are in the world.” His claws were now splayed out on the wooden surface before you, digging into it.

You being you—a fool of the highest degree—you placed your hand over his, hoping he didn’t grab your arm and sink his teeth into it. “You’re not scaring me off, Leon. And we made a deal, remember? You owe me for being willing to keep my mouth shut.”

He appeared dazed as he focused on your palm pressed to his knuckles, letting out a breath as he pulled away.

“You’re stubborn.” There was a faraway look in his eye as he added, “Reminds me of someone I know… Knew.”

“Someone good, I hope?”

He grinned, the already stretched skin of his mouth somehow pulling further. “The best.”

There was a tension between you that you couldn’t name, just looking at each other, when a loud scratching noise from the front door startled you.

“What the hell is that?” you questioned lowly, your vision zeroing in on the concerning sound.

Leon stood, looking unbothered as he strode over to the door, explaining simply, “Just Wolfie.” 

You looked at him as if he lost his mind, standing from your chair and backing towards the corner of the room. “Wolfie?”

Before you could protest, he flung open the door and a flash of white fur came barreling into the house, black feathers flying through the air.

You yelped as it rushed straight to you, closing your eyes and bracing for an impact that never came.

You peeked down through your fingers and saw a large white wolf-dog sitting in front of you, its tail wagging as it offered you the thing in its mouth.

“Good boy, bringing me a crow,” Leon praised in a strangely cute voice coming from… whatever the hell he was. It made something in you flutter. 

He walked over to you, leaning forward to pull the dead bird from the dog’s mouth, holding it by its neck as he inspected it. “Now that’ll be a good midnight snack.”

The dog nuzzled your leg and you bent to pet him, trying to ignore the blood that stained his snout (and now your pants). You noticed the gray hairs that decorated his white fur.

Oh, you’re an old little man, you thought, ruffling the dog’s thick coat.   

Disregarding the implications of your observation, you decided to poke fun at Leon’s naming skills instead, saying, “Wolfie, huh? How original.”

Leon hung the bird on a rope by its feet in the kitchen, turning to face you with a roll of his crimson eyes. “Don’t start.”

You giggled and he seemed to smile at the sound before glancing at the table and grimacing.

“Sorry about dinner, by the way. That was the last of my meat, unless you want to eat the crow. I might let you cook it, though.”

“It’s okay, I brought plenty of food in my bag.”

“Still, I really suck at this whole host thing.”

“Not threatening to eat the guests would be a great start to fixing that,” you teased.

“I’ll keep that in mind for next time,” he replied sarcastically. 

Leon took your plate and placed it on the floor, letting “Wolfie” scarf down your uneaten meal. He stroked the dog on the head lovingly, and despite how odd it was to witness the arachnid-like creature interact with a household pet in such a way, it was somehow sweet.

“Livestock,” he said after a moment, still crouched before his canine friend.

“What?”

“How I found out I liked raw meat.”

“I see.” 

He glanced up at you, then, continuing, “The villagers had livestock. Cows, pigs, chickens. Most of them were killed when the town dogs were turned by the Plagas. After I cleared out the parasites, I planned on keeping a few of the farm animals around, for eggs and milk, you know?”

“Why didn’t you?”

“I tried. But then I went a few days without eating, the wildlife in the area having fled during the chaos stirred up by the cult. There was nothing to hunt. Even the fish seemed to be hiding. I… I blacked out. Woke back up digging my claws into a half-eaten pig, surrounded by the bodies of the other dead livestock. I guess I—I guess I went into a hunger frenzy and slaughtered them all. Thank god I hadn’t found Wolfie at that point. I worry what would have happened if he were there.”

Your eyes widened at his confession, visibly stiffening up in horror.

He noticed your shift in demeanor and seemed to deflate, sighing miserably. “It hasn’t happened since. As long as I have something to eat every couple of days, I’m not a threat to you.”

Having witnessed him devour a chunk of venison just minutes prior, you relaxed marginally. “Still, a shame you wasted all that meat.”

He scrunched his nose before responding, “Actually… I didn’t waste it.”

“Wow, got quite the appetite, I take it?”

“Yes, but not that much.”

His evasive answers confused you. “I’m not sure what you mean.”

“Well, I didn’t want to lose myself again after that, so what bodies were left, I skinned and chopped up, putting them in the icebox. But then I ran out of fuel and couldn’t use the generator to power the electricity anymore. The meat went rancid. I was going to throw it out, obviously, but I was getting hungry again and I just… ate it anyway.”

You made a disgusted face. “Yum. I guess if you can’t get sick, you wouldn’t have to worry about food poisoning. Bet it didn’t taste great, though.”

“It didn’t, but meat is meat. I could stomach it and it kept me from going feral again. Small price to pay.” He sniffed as he stood up. “You have every reason to be afraid of me. Disgusted. I know I am.”

He looked away from you, then, his tail and appendages drooping in obvious distress.

You took a shaky exhale and stepped toward him, grabbing his arm and turning him to face you again, the confusion at your willingness to be closer to him after that conversation clear in his red irises. 

“I’ll be honest, you make me nervous,” you admitted. “But you’re obviously trying your best to hang on to the more human side of you. And I’ve never met a living cryptid before, so I think I just need time to adjust. That’s all.”

“Could I even be considered a cryptid anymore if you know who and what I am now?” he questioned with a light chuckle.

“I guess not to me, personally. But to the rest of the world? Still a cryptid, I’m afraid.”

“I’d rather not be anything to the world. Except maybe a long-forgotten ghost. Would make my life easier that way.”

“Well, luck’s on your side, cos with how popular my paranormal blog is becoming, I might be able to convince people this place is a bust and they’ll hopefully lose interest in El Escorpion altogether,” you offered.

“You’d be willing to do that for me?”

“For the right price, of course,” you told him, a sly smile on your face.

He snorted. “Of course.”

Things seemed to ease after that, the two of you chatting well into the night once you chowed down on some of the food you packed yourself.

He divulged very little about his life before the transformation, opting to tell you funny stories of his antics in the wilderness instead. He asked you about your work and even after you warned him that once you started rambling it was hard for you to stop, he encouraged you to anyway, seeming to listen intently.

You managed to circle back to why you ended up there with him in the first place, asking him about his run-ins with the occasional visitor. After describing his side of the various encounters, you both got a kick at how dramatically the others told their version of events, and how his cryptid name came to pass.

“The Scorpion, huh?” he asked in amusement, glancing at his own tail and appendages. “Guess they’re not far off.”

Eventually, the candles started burning down and a yawn bubbled up in your throat as you explained controversies in the cryptozoology community, like how some scholars speculated that certain cryptids are actually just very old B.O.W.s.

“As interesting as this has been,” Leon started after you let out another aggressive yawn, “I think it’s time to call it a night.”

“And I think I have to agree,” you said with a smile. “Where’re you putting me?” 

“C’mon, I’ll show you.” 

With that, he led you up the stairs, Wolfie hot on your heels. He took you to the door of the only bedroom in the building, opening it up to reveal a massive and very comfortable-looking canopy bed. 

You turned to Leon, confused. “There’s only one bed.”

He chuckled, plopping down on a blanket folded up on the floor next to his furry companion. “You take it. I’m good here.”

“You… sure?” you questioned tentatively.

“Positive.”

You nodded, smiling at him, and kicked off your shoes, climbing onto the mattress.

You watched him in shock as he fully retracted his appendages into his back.

He turned to catch you staring, eyebrows raised. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”

You cringed, feeling ashamed you got caught ogling him and his intriguing, monstrous form. “Sorry, just didn’t… expect that.”

“Never met a cryptid 'til now and you already have expectations?” he joked, leaning on an elbow to look up at you. His already too-short shirt rode up further and you blushed when you noticed his lean, muscular stomach become more exposed, looking away quickly.

“You know what I meant, you jerk,” you chided light-heartedly.

He laughed, the loudest and most genuine one he’d given to you since meeting him. The sound made you feel warm and you weren’t sure why.

“Get some rest, now,” he told you when his laughter subsided.

You stared at him for a moment longer after he turned away from you, curling up around his dog, before you replied, “Goodnight, Leon.” 

And with that, you leaned over to the bedside table and blew out the candle you had brought upstairs, darkness blanketing the room.

You stayed up for a while after that, mind going over the day, everything feeling so surreal from the moment you left the car just that afternoon. 

You could almost laugh to yourself as you drifted off to the sounds of Leon and Wolfie’s deep, even breaths echoing in the room, a soft wind blowing across the window.

Strange fuckin’ day.

+++

Leon was the first to rouse from slumber, unfurling himself from Wolfie and slowly sitting up. 

He was a little stiff from laying in the same position on the hard floor for so long, but otherwise, it had been a good night’s rest.

That was odd, he thought.

He rarely slept at all.

He heard a light snore and turned to find your still-unconscious form wrapped tightly up in his blankets, protecting yourself against the early autumn chill that crept through the room.

Silently, he stood, petting the white dog beside him that snorted in protest at his movements before making his way over to you.

Your hair was splayed out across the pillow, your eyelashes gently kissed your cheeks, and your round face seemed almost cherubic in the morning light that streamed in from the gap of the curtained window. 

Sleeping so peacefully with a monster mere feet from your vulnerable form.

He didn’t know what to make of you.

You had clearly been terrified the moment you saw him, and he could rationalize your initial inability to run as a freeze response, but you had heard a rustle in the foliage and got closer. You had seen glowing eyes and reached out. You had called him a liar when he told you he would eat you.

Did you have any sense of self-preservation?

Apparently not.

And then, despite your discomfort around him, you chatted with him like he was just another stranger passing on the street. And instead of ignoring his… differences… you commented on them. Asked about them as one would ask about the weather.

Well, you were a self-proclaimed paranormal investigator meeting a supposed cryptid, after all. It must have been a strange fascination that was causing you to be so curious instead of off-put.  

But what confused him the most was the fact you had touched him—gently and with ease—like you would a friend and not a literal monster threatening to kill you.

He looked down at his clenched knuckles, recalling the warmth of your palm as it rested upon the back of his hand. He thought about the way you smiled at him, how you bantered with him and teased him.

After so long by himself, he wanted to bask in this human connection he made despite knowing it was temporary. He prayed that after you left, it would tide him over until he was ready to say goodbye to this wretched existence for good.

He knew not to hope you would come back, or that he’d be lucky enough to meet someone else that would be as willing to talk to him instead of running for the hills. 

Besides, as under control as he felt now that he’d had a decade to maneuver in this new body, he wouldn’t want to risk hurting anyone. He had only ever lost control once and it haunted him ever since.

It was his worst fear if he was honest with himself. To lose his mind—his sentience—kept him up at night. Every day, he checked for signs that he might be mentally deteriorating, acting more beast than man. The longer he stayed away from other people, however, the harder it became to recognize what it was to be human in the first place.

All he knew was that he needed to end it before he ever reached that point, going from just threatening to eat trespassers, to ripping them limb from limb the moment he caught them. 

He couldn’t stand the thought of innocent blood on his hands after spending his whole life trying to protect it from being spilled at all.

You let out a sigh in your sleep and his gaze focused on you once more.

Despite how ridiculous you were to him, he was grateful to you for being so kind. Even as a human, he knew that was often hard to come across. And sure, he was technically paying you off to avoid attention, but that didn’t mean you had to be friendly towards him, especially after the ill-advised admittance of his eating habits.

He wondered how he would go about waking you, if he even should. 

Looked like he didn’t have to, though, when your eyes fluttered open and a scream left your lips as soon as you saw him.

He jumped back, holding up his hands in a gesture he hoped would dispel your fear. Wolfie leapt up, staggering with his old joints, before growling and searching for the possible threat in the room, oblivious to the fact it was Leon who frightened you.

It would almost be funny if you didn’t shift across the bed to get away from him. He could hear your heart thrumming behind your ribs like it had when you first met, and his own sank a bit.

He was still a monster, after all.

“It’s just me,” he said in a low, calming voice.

“Jesus, Leon, you scared the shit out of me!” you replied, pressing your hand to your chest. “Were you watching me sleep?!”

“Sorry, I didn’t know how to wake you up. I was trying to avoid scaring you, but that was a wasted effort.”

You let out a breathy chuckle, and he was pleased to hear your pulse rate begin to lower. “Maybe just call my name next time or something.”

He rose a brow at that.

Next time?

No, you must have misspoken.

Clearly unaware of how you vexed him, you moved to the edge of the bed and pulled on your shoes, stretching your arms as you finally stood up. “Well, c’mon, then. I’m starving.”

You pet Wolfie as you passed him by, the dog having calmed down from the excitement moments prior, before opening the door and strolling down the hall. 

Leon just stared after you, his mouth hanging ajar for a moment at your immediate change in demeanor. He still felt guilty that he had frightened you again, though this time completely by accident. It stung a bit, but he reminded himself that you should be afraid of a seven-foot-tall creature standing over you while you slept. 

He shook his head as if to clear it and followed you downstairs.

You had pulled out a cereal bar from your pack, munching away at it as you walked around the bottom floor of the house aimlessly. You turned to him as he made it into the dining room, swallowing a bite before speaking, “Don’t have much décor, I see.”

He shrugged. “There were pictures on the walls when I first settled in, but they were all of the people who died in the village and religious stuff. Felt weird to leave it up, so I put it all in the attic.”

“And you just didn’t bother to add anything else?” you teased.

“The only artwork I might consider using is in the old castle, but I didn’t think the hassle of getting it was worth it.” 

“Wait, there’s a castle and you chose to live here?” you questioned in disbelief.

He sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. “Too big. Plus, it’s just easier to hunt on this side of the lake.”

“A man of simple pleasures. I can respect it,” you told him, nodding sagely before you approached an empty shelf. “I take it there isn’t much literature around here, either?”

“Not really. Mostly journals and religious texts. Not exactly my cup of tea.”

“Anything from the cult?” There was an intrigued glimmer in your eye and Leon wondered if he would ever get used to it.

“All of it, actually.” 

“Anything… interesting?” you asked, coming closer to him and clasping your hands together, the empty wrapper of your breakfast forgotten on the dining room table. He reminded himself to tell you to clean it up before you left.

“‘Deranged’ is probably more accurate,” he said with a scoff. “But if you’re really that curious, I can go grab one of them for you. Hope you can read Spanish.” 

Your eyes lit up like a kid in a candy store and he couldn’t help but find it endearing. “Yes, I can read a bit! I tried to learn as much as I could before this trip and I also brought a translation dictionary!”

“Be right back, then.”

He quickly fished Los Illuminados’ text from the attic, returning downstairs to find you brushing your teeth in the kitchen sink. When you traveled back into the dining room, he placed it in your awaiting hands, and you practically squealed as you opened the old, ornate book.

“Wow, it’s beautiful,” you whispered in awe, flipping through the pages. “And look at these illustrations! You mind if I keep this?”

“Be my guest. I have no need for it,” he replied, enjoying the way you pored over the text with visible excitement. You grabbed your translation dictionary from your pack and were about to get to work when Leon cleared his throat.

“Not to ruin your fun but don’t you have to leave soon?” 

Your expression shifted, then, from one of glee to what he could only guess was disappointment. Almost like you didn’t want to leave. There was a spark of something at that, but he didn’t let it ignite.

“Right. My ride should be here soon,” you told him after checking your phone. Despite your words, you didn’t move, and he wondered what you could possibly be thinking in that pretty head of yours.

When you finally dragged your feet to pack your bag, Leon remembered the items he promised you as payment for your silence concerning his existence. He excused himself before heading into the room beside the one you were standing in, reaching into a drawer and pulling out an old ring and a handful of jewels he had collected over the years.

“You forgot something,” he said to you, unfurling his clawed hand to reveal the precious items in his palm.

You grabbed the ring first, twisting it around as you appraised it. “It seems a little early for a proposal, don’t you think, Leon?”

He scoffed and rolled his eyes, but could feel a faint heat tinge the tip of his now-pointed ears and what remained of his cheeks. “Yeah, you wish.”

You offered an impish smile before taking the gemstones as well and pocketing them. “Well, I do hope these are actually worth something and aren’t just cheap knock-offs.”

“Definitely real, I swear. Those things are antique.”

“They better be, or else I’ll have to come back here and kick your ass.”

He chuckled at the thought. “Easy there, tiger. I’m good on my word.”

You nodded and a quiet fell over the room.

“Well, guess it’s time to go,” you eventually muttered, grabbing your backpack and swinging it onto your shoulders before you headed to the door. You were slow to reach for the handle, seeming almost… reluctant. 

“Why don’t I… How about I walk you? Wouldn’t want you to get lost.” He didn’t know why he offered. If he was honest with himself, it was likely to prolong the last human interaction he’d probably ever have.

And he couldn’t deny he liked your company too.

You beamed at him as if that’s what you wanted him to say all along. “I’d like that, Leon.”

With Wolfie happily trotting behind the two of you, Leon led you into the early afternoon, the bright sun making him wince slightly, as it always did.

“You okay?” you questioned him. He shouldn’t have been surprised by your observation, already proving to him that very little got past you.

“Yeah, just… sensitive to the light, is all,” he replied with a squint of his eyes.

“Really? How come?”

He chuckled. Ever curious, weren’t you? “The Plagas are—were—damaged by light. Or the more exposed ones, I guess."

“Then how are you even handling being outside right now?”

“Not sure. Acclimated, I guess? I couldn’t go out during the day at all when I first turned. Then I just slowly spent more and more time in the sun. It’s… uncomfortable... but it doesn’t feel like I’m burning alive anymore.”

“Jesus,” was all you were apparently able to say, gripping your backpack straps.

You were both quiet for a few minutes, and he was thinking of ways to keep talking, not wanting to end the interaction in awkward silence.

“So I get you have a passion for the supernatural and all, but why come out here on your own? Don’t you have anyone who could come with you?”

You sighed. “My family and friends think I’m wasting my time. I’ve been on investigations with others like me, but I found I preferred to be alone.”

“Not even a boyfriend worried about you, huh?” He knew that was an unnecessary pry, but he couldn’t help but wonder.

“Not at the moment, no.”

He felt a strange sort of relief but refused to inspect it, instead pushing the conversation forward, “You must be some kind of adrenaline junkie, then, to be running around in the middle of nowhere, looking for monsters.”

“Maybe a little.” You shrugged. “You must be, too, considering you were a cop and an agent, right?”

“No, that’s different. I became a cop in order to help people, not that I was much good at it. And I was forced to be an agent to protect someone. Don’t get me wrong, I can’t deny the rush of doing something dangerous, but I never really looked for it. Was just forced to face it. I don’t really understand why you’d risk your life for a hobby.”

“I guess I just want to find the truth about things, no matter what it takes.” He sensed that maybe there was more to it than that as you looked away from him, instead focusing on the path ahead.

“Well, you’re lucky you haven’t gotten hurt yet. You have no idea if you’ll run into a B.O.W. or even just a wild animal that won’t hesitate to tear you to shreds,” he admonished.

“I guess I am lucky,” you agreed, nodding. “Lucky I found a big softie like you instead.” 

He rolled his eyes at that. “I don’t know if you recall, but I told you I would eat you at least twice yesterday.” 

“And yet you didn’t. Interesting.”

He wasn’t sure what to say to that, annoyed that you called him on his bluff. But then you looked up at him, radiant smile teasing and eyes bright.

He was surprised when the two of you were already at the lodge, past the village gate, so focused on you that he was mindless to anything else.

You moved to enter the building but halted when he did, turning to face him in confusion.

“This is as far as I go,” he explained, Wolfie sitting politely at his side. “Don’t want to startle whoever is here to get you.” 

“Right, makes sense.”

The two of you stood there silently for a few moments, and you seemed just as unwilling to say goodbye as he was.

“Well… guess I better go,” you finally told him, kicking the dirt with the tip of your shoe.

“Probably a good idea.”

“It’s honestly a shame I have to leave already.”

He raised a brow. “And why is that?”

“Because I’ve enjoyed getting to know you,” you replied softly.  

Leon was taken aback by that, something warm settling inside of him. To say he felt the same was an understatement. He didn’t voice it. In fact, he didn’t voice anything, at a loss.

To dispel the tension, you quickly and teasingly added, “And I didn’t get to explore this place nearly as much as I wanted to.”

“Well, there will always be other places.” He cringed at his own words and how stupid they were.

“There sure are.” You laughed, the sound melodic, and he was reminded of your singing. How your voice alerted him to your presence just yesterday afternoon. It felt like a lifetime since then, and simultaneously like a blink of an eye.

“It was nice to meet you, Leon.” You held out your hand to him, and he realized after a moment of staring at it you meant for him to shake it. It was a far cry from the day before, certainly. 

“You too,” he said, gingerly touching his palm against your own and shaking your hand carefully, enjoying the warmth of it against his always-cool skin.

You released him—far too soon, he felt—and his arm fell lamely at his side.

You pet Wolfie, scratching his ears affectionately as you said goodbye to the old dog, before focusing back on Leon.

You seemed almost somber as you told him earnestly, “I hope the rest of your life is kind to you.” 

He looked over your form, committing everything to memory. The color of your eyes, your round cheeks, your soft curves, the shape of your lips and how they framed your smile. 

The urge to caress your face was a shockingly difficult one to ignore.

With all his mental strength, he managed to refrain, saying instead, “Same for you.”

You nodded once, offering a final wave, and then you were through the door.

Leon stood there for a long time, hearing your footsteps getting more and more distant.

He stayed in place even as he heard you greet your ride.

He stayed until the car pulled away, the sound of it eventually fading completely.

All was quiet once more.

It felt suffocating.

Wolfie nudged Leon’s leg and finally, he moved, begrudgingly turning on his heels and heading back to the house.

He was lost in thought as he arrived, closing himself into the dark once more.

He grabbed the crow that Wolfie had caught the night before, planning on plucking it clean and sharing it with him, until he noticed a folded piece of paper on the kitchen counter.

Curious, he stopped in his tracks, picking it up and gently prying it open with his claws. Inside of it was a small, crude drawing of a rabbit, a short note scrawled underneath that read:

Something to remember me by~

Your lil bunny rabbit

He couldn’t stop the chuckle that left his mouth, echoing in the empty room.

After a moment, he set down the page, sighing deeply—warily.

Leon was alone again.

+++

The rest of your day had passed in a blur, barely able to hold a conversation with the local who picked you up from the village and took you to your hotel room. You paced for a long time once you arrived, eventually ordering takeout to abate your growling stomach but eating it without really tasting it.

Your mind could only focus on Leon.

Maybe you were crazy, but he seemed just as regretful to say goodbye as you had been.

He did say you were the only person he’d spoken to in ten years, so you didn’t want to let yourself hope that perhaps the connection with him you felt you made was genuine. He was just lonely, and you were still a stranger, after all.

You sighed, pulling the golden ring he gave you from your pocket as you sprawled across the bed, holding it up to the light to watch the ruby set into it shimmer. It reminded you of his eyes.

You groaned.

Your flight was tomorrow morning and now you had to make up some lie on your blog that was interesting enough to read without encouraging anyone to seek out the village themselves. 

Tall order.

You tried to focus on what you could potentially say, but all your thoughts led straight back to the strange creature you spent the night with.

He was lonely, yes. But so were you.

You glanced at the time on your phone, knowing you needed to sleep before your flight home.

And then an idea crossed your mind.

This trip was meant exclusively for business, not pleasure, and you realized you hadn’t been on a proper vacation in a long, long time. Your savings were in good shape, your rent was paid for the month, and you worked from home.

You held the ring in your hand, closing your fist around it, the gem decorating it digging into your palm just hard enough to sting.

It was set, you decided.

You were going to stay.

--------------------

Masterlist | Previous | Next

[hoebiirama]

What's "Preganan" ?

✑ Anonymous sent : "Could I have an imagine/a little scenario of Madara explaining to his son that his wife is pregnant again and that he'll have a little sibling soon?"

✑ Anli's useless comment : Listen... I know I said I don't take requests for scenarios and my point still holds but you can't throw dad!Madara at me and expect to get a simple headcanon post, I'm just too weak for this man, it's not even funny ㅠㅠ I however wish to apologize for how short it is I also couldn't stop myself from naming his son Fukuya after my own OC from a fic I'm currently working on, I love this boy so much that it's become the default name I use for any male Uchiha OC at this point lol

Content warning : AFAB!Reader (use of she/her pronouns) // Obvious mention of pregnancy // Madara is awkward af // My writing skills are rusty and it shows

Masterpost | Rules | Send a request | Works in Progress

Fukuya hadn't expected to see his father waiting for him right outside the Academy grounds that evening, and there's a split second where all the little boy can do is stare at the man leaning against the fence gate, frozen in place.

It's not that he isn't excited to see him, not at all. It's very much the opposite, but it's so sudden and unusual that he can't help but wonder, for a moment, if today is meant to be something important, and he worries that he may have forgotten about it. Usually, Madara is too busy to come pick him up after class — not to mention his father typically tends to scare children away, though Fukuya doesn't understand why — so the task was almost always yours to take on. Needless to say both Madara's presence and your absence are enough to unsettle the 5-year-old boy for a short time, until he catches his father frowning in confusion at his strange behavior and is effectively brought out of his stupor.

Madara can't help the little smirk of pride that betrays his normally neutral expression when he sees his son running up to him, and happily welcomes his embrace when Fukuya clings to his hip, even returning it with a one-armed hug. Though the man really isn't fond of public displays of affection as a general rule, it's a different story when it comes to his son, even if he tends to keep it to a minimum; he knows people are staring, and he can't help but feel like it's a breech of privacy.

His possessive tendencies extend even to Fukuya — it took a lot of work and dedication for you to convince him to let your son attend the Academy just like every other kid his age.

Not one to make small talk, or at least to initiate it, Madara remains silent as he uses the arm he has draped around his son's shoulders to gently nudge him forward, guiding him towards the direction of your home, on the other side of the village. Fukuya doesn't protest, and he's too giddy about his father being there to take the time to say goodbye to his friends before he and Madara are on their way.

It doesn't take long for Fukuya to turn nervous, however. The moment the Academy is out of their field of vision, a heaviness settles in the pit of his stomach — he still doesn't have an answer to his question, but he's too hesitant to ask about it. He knows he has nothing to fear, but he feels awkward about the fact that Madara never explained why he was there to begin with. It feels like he should've by now, so Fukuya doesn't understand why his father hasn't said a single word to him this entire time.

Madara, however, doesn't fail to notice Fukuya's unease, and unlike his son, he can read the boy like an open book. He was aware that he would question where his mother was even before he left for the Academy. The problem is that Madara dreads the questions he knows are bound to follow, and he's just not ready to have this discussion with his son, who's still practically a baby in his eyes.

He knows he has to, though, because Fukuya is bound to find out one way or another, and he'd rather have the boy be prepared for it instead of being confronted with the situation and not knowing how to handle it.

Madara sighs, finally resigned. "I know you're wondering where your mother is."

Fukuya turns his head up to look at his father and nods, confirming Madara's assumptions.

"She wasn't feeling well today, so I told her to stay home and rest," he then explains. The neutral tone of his voice does nothing to give Fukuya any clues about the gravity of the situation — if anything, it just serves to confuse him further.

"Is mommy sick ?" Fukuya worries.

Madara frowns. "It's a bit more complicated than that."

Silence.

"I don't understand."

"Your mother is pregnant," Madara simply answers.

Fukuya stares at him, eyebrow raised, as if his father just spoke a completely alien language to him.

"What— what's preganan...?

"Pregnant," Madara corrects him.

This isn't going well, and Madara is so grateful that you aren't there to witness the embarrassment. He's already uncomfortable with the discussion and he hasn't even gotten into the actual subject yet. If it were only for him, he would've dropped the bomb on Fukuya from the beginning, but of course you had to make him promise to be gentle in his approach, and he had to comply because he loves you too much to disappoint you.

You carrying his child is his ultimate weakness, but Gods forbid he'll ever admit it to anyone. He'd rather die than tell the truth, even if you're fully aware of that fact already.

"It means there's a baby growing inside of her."

"Oh."

Fukuya doesn't add anything to this, but Madara decides to let him speak first before continuing. He doesn't want to do this but he gave you his word, and he isn't one to go back on it.

"Wait, does it mean I'm a big brother now ?" Fukuya's sudden excitement at the thought of having a younger sibling he can take care of warms Madara's heart so much more than the man thought it ever could.

"In a few months you will be," Madara nods.

"Yes ! I can't wait !" Fukuya exclaims. Madara doesn't think he's ever seen him so elated before, and he fails to completely hold back his smile.

He's also glad and so incredibly relieved that Fukuya doesn't ask him how babies are made on the rest of the way home. And, in truth, so are you — there are so many reasons you don't want him to be on duty to explain that one to anyone, children or not.

But that in itself is a story for another day. And one Fukuya definitely doesn't need to be aware of.

[atomic52]

okay my turtles have gone through a bit of an overhaul, Splinter too

lets also go into so detail for each on this time around lol.

Leonardo

soft spoken leader of his team but only the second oldest. he enjoys comic books, cowboys, sci fi, and spending time with his father sharpening his ninja skills.

He is the most focused on being the best he can be at everything he sets his mind to. he's a bit of a sour loser but he gets over it fairly quickly.

Leo is the medic of the grope, he knows how to do three different types of stiches, how to properly set a broken bone, how to put joints back into place, and much more.

he fluent in Japanese in specking and in writing.

he has some OCD so when it comes to his things they have to be just right, or it'll bug him. he's also a perfectionist.

Leo tries to be the voice of reason but can easily be talked into doing something stupid.

Raphael

hot headed, introverted, and protective oldest brother. he enjoys cage fighting, most sports, knitting, and secretly monster mythology.

Raph wants nothing but the best for his brothers, so he tends to go over bored on pushing them to their fullest potential but in turn is hard on himself when he falls behind.

he protects his family by taking out any threat before his brothers even know it's there. which makes more trouble than he can get himself out of and leads him to putting every little problem on his own shoulders instead of trusting in the strength of his younger brothers.

he fully understands Japanese and can read it, but he can't get the accent right to save his life.

Raph's anger tends to build up very quickly and lash out at the people closest to him but he never means what he says. he takes a moment to cool down and tell his family he's sorry in his own way, mostly giving meaningful gifts.

he is very quick to join in on something stupid cuz doing is alot more fun then thinking about it.

Donatello

mega middle child with a brilliant mind and hand for engineering. Donnie most enjoys playing video games, making fun of sci fi, taking everything apart and putting it back together just to see how it works, and dancing.

Don is average in his ninja skills, he's light on his feet and can slip away into the shadows like it's nothing, but he feels like he's not as good as his brothers.

he's bit of a packrat and a kleptomaniac. he keeps everything he thinks he can make something out of (which normal he does) and anything he finds techy and fascinating he'll put it in his pocket to take it home.

he and Raph are partners in crime. what Raph does he does too and the other way around. so, when Raph jumps into danger Donnie is right behind him.

Don is technically fluent in Japanese but says he's rusty cuz he tends to throw phrases together in hopes of stringing a descent sentence that sounds okay.

he is the most stubborn and jealous out of everyone. when someone is taking up time meant for him or taking the attention away from him he will find away to get revenge.

Michelangelo

lighthearted and extroverted baby brother. everything is a joke and if it isn't, it will be. he enjoys making trouble, spending time with his family, making new friends, and partying.

he has the rawest skill and ability in his ninjitsu, but he has no drive. he just likes live free and in the wind.

Mikey can get away with most everything just by tearing up a little, but that trick doesn't work on Donnie. playing dumb is his biggest strength but the ones closest to him knows he is a master at emotional manipulation.

also fluent in Japanese just like Leo but has no drive to prove himself.

Mike wants to see the good in everyone so that makes him quick to trust but very naive. he'll stick up for what he believes in and will stand up to any challenge but once his trust is broken, that is something no one will ever get back.

YOLO

Splinter

a single father to four strong willed and rambunctious boys. once movie star and ninja master Hamato Yoshi, but now mutated and known lovingly as master Splinter or dad.

most of his personal history is unknown by his sons, it has ties to some dark things he does not what them to know of yet. he wants them to enjoy their lives before his past becomes their future.

now his life is devoted to his children and readying them for what life may hold for them.

teaching them the Hamato clan tradition, ninjitsu, and bushido

he enjoys spending time with his children, and watching his soap operas.

[foxsketch6543]

*OLD*

Jessie “Stormy” Black

(AKA “Cipher”)

(BTW Jessie uses any pronouns but they/it are default)

So far, they were mostly created for my VBros AU that I'm making, and they are meant to be a polar opposite to Pete White and he met them after all the events in VBros Season 7 and the movie and they have a positive relationship. Jessie is a petty hacker and has a history of tampering with technology and computers but works at a Best Buy and is a skilled coder.

Jessie likes old games from the 70s-90s, Sci-Fi media, and has a bad sweet tooth, and loves a lot of candies or anything sugary. (Especially energy drinks!) And they attended Stuyvesant University around the same time Pete and Rusty attended State University during the events of the flashbacks of ‘Past Tense’. They mostly lived in Brooklyn, NY for most of their life. LOL

At some point had started as a “hero” who was heavily villains for their morals where they were and at some attempted to arch Captain Sunshine (they didn’t see eye to eye with morality) at some point and later on “retired” and decided to become a full villain.

And they happen to have some Guild connections but wasn’t registered because they wanted to “fly solo”. But in the very late 90s and early 2000s they kinda rebranded their moniker, “CIPHER” with themselves being an online blogger where they have conspiracy theories and had dirt on “protagonists” and lots of lore related crap. So far throughout Cipher’s villain career, they were most anonymous and hidden underground in obscurity.

Meanwhile Stormy just became their own character while developing them. And them being an anti-villain is a lot of fun writing too. LOL

They do have a history with hijacking and tampering computers media stations, and tech, but they aren’t associated with the Guild. This character also has massive Screenslaver vibes (and Riddler) but just commits petty vandalism and just likes to troll people. Their arc is them having a balance with their double life and touch fucking grass for once.

[choicesficwriterscreations]

CFWC Writer of the Month: the-pale-goddess

Each month CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers, and this month’s writer of the month is @the-pale-goddess! We hope you will enjoy learning more about her and her work below! The writer is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page.

Quick Links:

Tumblr Blog: the-pale-goddess Blog Masterlist

1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played? 

I downloaded Choices in an extremely terrifying moment of my life in late 2019. I was seeing the ads everywhere and thought that this game might serve as a fairly decent distraction. Well, I wasn’t wrong skfjksjfk 

I’m not sure which one was actually the first, but it was either the default TRR or Save The Date promoted at that time. 

2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?

My obsession with Open Heart and Ethan Ramsey tied nicely with the release of the second book in 2020. The lockdown allowed me to explore this fictional world further, so I started looking for more content. I found the legendary Denise, aka @justanotherrookie, while lurking on IG. That’s when my long-forgotten Tumblr account came to my mind, and I logged in with the intention of scrolling through the tags to satisfy my EJR thirst.

3- How did you pick your blog name? 

Oh, dear…It’s very silly! My skin is extremely pale and I have always been obsessed with music; hence the combo. 

Fun fact: this account is quite old (though still not as old as my tumbroke card; I had like three other accounts before this one), and I was slightly embarrassed to enter a new fandom with my dusty aesthetic blog signed by some ominous name, but decided to go with the flow. Then the-pale-goddess has become my brand, and it was too late for any changes–anyone who has changed their URL knows how problematic blogging is afterward.

4- Pull up the first post in your archive, and tell us about it!  

My first fandom post was inspired by the frustrating ending of the softball chapter AND the first hiatus announcement…It didn’t age well. As we all know, Ethan & MC didn’t ‘talk about it.’ What’s more, we had to survive a long OH drought before PB decided to resume the second book. 

Three years later, the very same shitpost is still the most popular Choices post on my silly little blog lol

5- How long have you been writing fanfiction?

3 years, fanfiction is my pandemic baby! Though I’ve been writing since I was a kid, it was mostly poetry and never in English. But as time passed, I got more occupied with my teenage life and eventually lost motivation to write. That old passion resurfaced several years later, at the beginning of the pandemic. Apart from the obvious need for distraction from the COVID situation, I was frustrated that my English skills were getting rusty, so I decided to dive in. 

6- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to write about?

No surprise here: Open Heart (the first book) and Open Heart 😂 I never tried writing about any other Choices book. 

7- Share the first fanfic you wrote with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were writing it today?

Miami Heat aka my smutty Miami AU. The concept is brilliant, but the execution…Yikes! I often think of rewriting the entire thing because the writing is amateur at best and my inner perfectionist cringes whenever I think of this mini-series.  

8- What is your favorite fic that you’ve written?

It all depends on my mood, so here’s a list of my favorites!

9- Do you have a fic that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to be but found could use a little more love?

Cabin Fever - apparently this 69 plotless smut is iconic for some reason? I don’t really get the hype. It has an insane amount of kudos on ao3, my other fics can’t compare lol 

Burnt - Book 1 mutual pining E&T classic and one of my absolute favorites (we’re talking top 3); it could definitely use a little more love!

10- If you could write only angst, fluff, or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why? 

I’ll shock you all and say that I wish I could write fluff for the rest of my life kjgkdgjkdf But since I suck at it, I’d love to be stuck with angst and a dash of smut. 

It’s probably a sad thing to admit, but I feel the most comfortable while writing angst. The realism of pain and the emotions that follow are simply very familiar, and it’s easy for me to conjure up a creative image to match the idea. Besides, there’s so much to explore in the angsty realm: all the flavor, nuance, layers, and symbolism. The possibilities are endless!

Smut doesn’t need an explanation, does it? I live on the thirst street 🤡

11- Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?

I do. That’s probably why Open Heart got me sucked right in–OH MC felt very real and relatable, I couldn’t help but see bits of myself in her. Though we share many traits and experiences, Tiffany definitely isn’t an extension of me. I poured my heart and soul into this woman, but she has become her own person and I try to avoid self-projecting into her character unless there’s a clear purpose. 

12- What element of writing do you struggle with most?

Recently, I have been struggling with writing in general lol The internet is ruthless!

My biggest issue is that self-loathing perfectionist who doesn’t let me enjoy the process, nothing seems to be good enough for her, and that attitude dims my motivation and hinders creativity.

On a more technical note, I absolutely suck at describing basic movement. I could churn out a long essay on a character’s internal struggle explaining the most complex emotions or a 4K elaborate smut, but when it comes to finding the right words to portray the simplest action, like walking down the stairs or setting the scene for an early morning conversation at the hospital, I feel lost kdhdkhdkdb 

13- Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?

Pretty much all of my WIPs are neglected 🤡 But here are the most important projects I’m hoping to finish at some point in the not-too-distant future: 

Home With You AU

Past, Present, Future

My Way Home Is Through You

14- If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to read your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you recommend they read first? 

Since fanfic is based on an existing work of fiction, and the core plotlines and characters should be well-known to the readers, I guess it could be a tedious and confusing read for someone who isn’t involved in the fandom. But then I have received comments from people unfamiliar with OH who have stumbled upon my fics and gave them a chance, so maybe I’m wrong lol 

I like to think that I would be okay with sharing my works with someone I know and trust in real life, but let’s be honest: my crippling anxiety would stop me ksjfkjssd However, if I were to pick a fic rec, I’d choose Heaven Upside Down AU because it doesn’t need an extensive OH knowledge. Plus, I’m very proud of this series.

15 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing? 

While I try to keep my writing style unique and simply mine, there are three lovely ladies who had a huge impact on my writing journey:

@writinghereandthere (aka an actual genius and my writing role model) was the direct source of inspiration behind my fanfic revelation. I fell in love with Ethan and Mariana, Ana’s beautiful prose, her wit, unparalleled talent, and fantastic characterization. Her writing changed the trajectory of my life. Though she left the fandom long ago, her masterlist is a must-read for everyone, trust me! (Ana, if you’re reading this: I miss you more than words can convey. Sorry for the spam I leave in your inbox every now and then skgjksgjk Hope to hear about your original work soon ❤️)

@starrystarrytrouble & @terrm9 - these two literary geniuses have inspired me to follow my own writing path and develop a distinctive style. Their masterpieces offer poetic, raw emotions, encouraging me to allow myself more creative freedom. I’m in constant awe of their unmatched talent and come back to their works whenever I want to feel things ❤️

16- Which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series? 

Can I have all of them, please? 

I would pay all my money to watch a TV series based on my canon OH plotline…I’m not kidding, I even made a bunch of Netflix edits because I need it in my life. On the other hand, my precious AUs would look amazing on the big screen! The most scrumptious one still hasn’t left my head though, so you have to trust me–the cinematic potential is truly there kdgjkdgjk 17- Do you write original fiction? 

I have a few ideas, but they’re so complex I’m stuck on the outlining phase. Mayhaps one day?

18 -  What other hobbies do you have?

I’m a certified music freak and a cinephile. I practice destroying male egos on a daily basis. I love photography, niche sports, playing with my dog, lifting people’s moods, random unhinged facts, and ignoring reality, and I have just entered my skincare expert era. 

19 - What’s your favorite emoji? 

🥰 + ✨ + 💀 

These three emojis perfectly encapsulate who I am as a person, I think: full of love and magic, but also dead inside ksjgksjgks 

20: BONUS - tell us anything you’d like (if you want to)

I’d like to thank our lovely admins for giving me this exciting opportunity to ramble about my tiny corner on this hellsite and showcase my word vomit. My heart is full of gratitude! I may not be as active as I used to be, and real life doesn’t allow me to change that, but our fandom will always have a special place in my heart, and I feel very lucky to be a part of this community. Thank you for still putting up with me and supporting my fictional world ❤️❤️❤️

[vividless]

Now I know a lot of yall might be wondering about missing files, and I just wanna say I am still working on it! It is, however, taking a bit to write chapter 3. So for now I want to show yall somthing new while you wait!

Bound By Chance!! (Cover art by rusty gloinks go follow them ^^)

Now, this story won't be coming out for a bit, but I love it too much to keep it a secret any longer :]

Bound By Chance is a fantasy romance story I've been developing for a long while, and I hope you like it!

Now, the basic plot is that the prince's soul gem gets shattered, and milo, our main character was in the right place at the right time and by some extremely miniscule chance he had a compatible soul gem. Now, they are on an expedition to find the material needed to fix the prince's gem.

The story itself is a lot more complicated, but this is the basic summary of the plot so yall can get an idea of what the story is

Now, with that out of the way, let me introduce the three main characters

Milo

Milo is a rather free spirited and kinda mischievous character who tends to act on his own accord and act on impulse often getting himself in troubling situations, but that doesn't stop him. He can be very charismatic and can often talk himself out of bad situations, although there are some times his talking is what gets him in these situations.

Milo is middle class of sorts. He owns and runs a farm of his own on a piece of land that his father had given him when he was old enough. Dispite being well off Milo is a kleptomaniac and steals things with little value or just things that are completely useless.

Milo is a half breed being half elf and half harpy. His magic skills are average, and his preferred form of magic is bard magic

Edith

Edith is a tough, hardworking person who will often come across as mean or harsh due to her realistic/pessimistic worldview. She can be quick to tell you if an idea is bad wrong or just plain stupid. (That last one is mainly directed at milo). Dispite this. She can still be a pleasant person to be around.

Edith is also middle class running a blacksmithing shop on Milo's farmland. Milo and her are good friends. How the two came to meet id like to keep a secret as well as other things about her past because story reasons. She is good at what she does and also masters many other different crafts.

Edith is an elf who possesses basic magic skills like milo. Her preferred magic type is fire magic.

Cecil

Cecil is very quiet and tends to do exactly as told. He doesn't seem to talk unless he is directly spoken to, so not many people know what he's like. He's rather good at masking his emotions, often seeming cool and collected or aloof and distant.

Cecil is royalty, specifically a prince. He leads the king's army and is quite good at it. He has led the army to victory every time and is considered a formidable opponent. He's spent his whole life under the training of his father in both magic, physical, and fighting aspects.

Cecil is an umbraling (a fantasy race I have made up), and his magic is very advanced. He favors spells of his own, making which are often different types of magic combined.

Thank you all so much for reading! I plan to do this with all of my other stories, too, so stay tuned for that, I can't promise it being soon as character designs and posts like this take time so just be patient ^^ . the reason I made this was I needed a small break from writing Missing Files, but I promise chapter 3 will be out as soon as possible! But for now, if you want to know anything else about these characters or any of my OCs, my ask box is open! So feel free to ask!

Alright, this is getting long, so this is the end of the post, lol

[faelune-home]

FFXIVWrite 2024 #20: Duel

(A/n: Oh hey, I finally did another role questline that wasn't the magic one aha. Just a brief one of Estinien having to deal with Landenel the doof.

And I do mean brief, I'm glad I didn't end up close to 2k on one of these again, cos I keep thinking these should be beefier to account for the rewrites and new perspectives, but also...a lot of writing. I'll need to get used to just embracing these briefer interactions, they're still valid for adding dynamics here.

This technically also skips ahead part of the melee quest where they initially try to negociate with the Sahagins being turned, but part of me wanted to get to interacting with the CoH for Estinien enrichment lol. I can always backtrack to the Sahagin moment later.

Word count: 695)

They had their ragtag group of retired mercs ready to begin their respective duties into dealing with the threats of the blasphemy and the Leviathan summoning. Estinien himself had been placed with the blasphemy hunters due to his own skill set, as well as an aside from Fhara and Wheiskaet that the group could do with an extra eye to mind them.

Fhara herself was prepared to join the reconnaissance team until a call from elsewhere meant she had to leave them to it.

As it was then for the main combat force, they were all left waiting for orders. And for Landenel and Brayflox, that meant training.

Brayflox was already an interesting one, having made it clear she was better suited with her explosives, but even she had a stubby little short sword in hand to practise moves and take swipes at a rusted bucket for her practice. Not much Estinien could offer for assistance.

Landenel had already made himself known as a showboater eager to sink his teeth into the action, but for all his boasting of bloodthirst and desiring battle, his jabs against the training dummy betrayed his deterioration. His stance was that of a classically trained Gridanian lancer, but he was slow and sluggish, clearly far too used to manning a station that never saw any real danger.

As though sensing Estinien’s eyes upon him and the mental critique going through his mind, Landenel stood up straight and leaned upon his lance, casting a sharp look at him.

“Something you wish to say, ser? You look like you have much on your mind,” he asked, tone notably barbed.

“Just minding your training, seeing if there’s anything I could offer. If you’re willing to take it,” Estinien said carefully, not wanting to provoke a fight when they were supposed to be allies. Getting injured before they were needed wouldn’t help either.

“Well, if you’re offering, why not a duel?” Landenel smirked, “After all, as you can no doubt tell, I’m rather rusty here. And you’re clearly a veteran that’s stayed on top of his skills.”

“I’d rather not, not yet at least,” Estinien responded, folding his arms, “Better to get you back up to speed before we try anything like that. If you get injured, you won’t be much use to the cause.”

That remark only caused the other's smirk to deepen into a scowl.

“You’re incapable of holding back? Or do you think me so out of practice that I couldn’t hold my own?”

“It's better for you to build up your strength against a peer of similar skill level. Such as Lady Brayflox here,” Estinien countered, gesturing with a nod to the goblin, who had stepped away from her bucket to watch their conversation. She did a little dance upon acknowledgement.

“Pshhhhh… Shkohhh… Yes! Brayflox help Landenel with stamina! Use bang boom sticks to help go zip zap to avoid danger!”

Landenel’s grimace was a picture.

“Absolutely not. I’d be better off hiking all the way back to Gridania and putting in a training request with the Wood Wailers.”

“But you can’t do that because then you betray that you’ve let yourself slip while you were meant to be on guard duty,” Estinien said, already noticing the pinched expression on the other man as he called his character exactly.

“In mine own defence, Camp Tranquil is rather appropriately named,” Landenel grumbled beneath his breath. Estinien ignored his statement and marched up, lighting kicking the supporting lance from under him. It wasn’t enough to send Landenel sprawling to the ground, but it made him stumble, having to catch himself on Estinien’s armour, though he quickly righted himself again, shooting a glare back.

“I wouldn’t duel with you, but I can give you some tips. It’s still up to you to keep up with your training. We need to be ready for the first call to battle, and it could happen a sennight from now or it could happen within the next bell.”

Landenel scowled once more, glare darkening further. Then he nodded stiffly, expression morphing into that cocky smirk once more.

“Then let’s get started. Wouldn't want to be caught unawares.”