#nah it’s cool that people care abt things wish I could relate maybe

[6ebe]

Why are people on my dash getting genuinely heated abt an f1 driver charity football match like. are we doing this. are we actually doing this.

[unhingedlesbear]

Gonna give my opinions on the tcofs characters bc why not:

Bonnie: My fuckin fav. Love her. She was my favourite running up to the game's release and is still my favourite now. Love all her interactions w the other characters, I just wish there was more variation surrounding her

Linda: THE QUEEEN I love Linda. She's likeable every time u see her and seems like the most reasonable character on both ends imo

Chris: I ended up really liking Chris. I've sworn to defend her since before the game came out and I guess I really have my work cut out for me considering even I found it a little hard to like her sometimes. But overall I did like her a lot. She was pretty ignorant and too bold sometimes but I liked her enthusiasm

Jaime: Jaime was okay. I didn't like him too much but he was alright. Didn't care for his weird jealousy thing w Robert, that pissed me off a lot but oh well, he was okay. Didn't see him past his first death opportunity so maybe that had something to do with it

Sam: Sam was cool, I liked him in the prologue and even though we don't see him TOO much after that, what he did have was pretty neat. Respectable guy who seemed pretty damn self sacrificial. Too bad he died in such a fucked way for us... poor dude

Robert: I wish we saw more of him bc he seemed like a nice guy from what we got. They could have done a lot more with him considering his relation to Sam but they kinda just have a few dialogues and scenes involving it. I liked him tho

Madi: She was so cute I stg, I loved her personality and her interactions w other characters. There probably is more to say abt her but I forgor.. I do remember really liking her tho

Stan: Pffft nah

These are the ones that are coming to me rn I probably forgot some people but uhhhh mrrp!

[choco-style]

lately I’ve found myself mind yelling “shut the fuck up” more than usual and I don’t know who to talk to because there’s nothing anyone can do to stop it, I just have to wait to go to school and feel better, which is crazy because the general opinion on school is “god I hate it I just wanna go home” and that’s what I used to think too when I was in my awful 5-8 grade class

and it’s not just real life people I want to shut up, I feel like I’m getting more defensive and my favourite creators are getting called all kinds of things by people who claim to have the higher moral ground (or whatever you call it), when they themselves wish terrible things upon people who have either done nothing wrong, or who have apologized for everything they did wrong. and it’s 99% on tumblr. now I understand why no one fucking likes this site.

and I’m back again in this state where “I wanna go home” doesn’t at all refer to the actual apartment, but to a mentally happy place. and it sounds edgy when your brain says I wanna go home I wanna go home I wanna go home I wanna go home please shut the fuck up

this isn’t even that bad and it’s nothing serious and I don’t know how I feel about all this I just needed to let it out and tumblr is where I can write longass “diary entries” and very few people who I care about will read them, and if someone has a problem with them I don’t give a single shit about their feelings and I hope they get the help they need to not turn into a shitty person or worse.

ive also been kinda mean??like not quite but kinda??? i dont know i just feel like i peaked and now im just kinda there. but im not even in the neutral empty doorway kind of state, its like now im in the room but idk what i wanna do and i need to pee but theres no toilet and im just there. like how dreams feel sometimes,,,,, idk aaagh

during the first 5 days of the week i look forward to the weekend because that keeps me happy and good and nice but then the weekend is the worst part of every week and i look forward to going to school, and now i wont even have this escape because this is the last week were going to school this decade and i have to breathe the same air and hear the same sounds as my family and i dont want to, i wanna go to school and be distracted and plan out my evenings and mornings when im basically alone. or something. i dont know what im talking about. i just dont want winter break. i dont wanna talk to my family when theyre all together. whenever theres even two people from my family in the same room i feel like i want to cry and i end up wishing id made plans or something, anything just to be somewhere else. 

youtube videos arent working anymore. or they are, but not really. i can block out the sound partially but i can still hear other people. and i think its normal but also fucked up. “what is?” well thanks for asking, me in “ “s, having these people argue so much is common but fucked up, having to stop whatever ur doing just to check whether or not a family member is crying, only to find out theyre laughing, is fucked up but maybe common. wanting to be home alone is common and not fucked up i think. going into a mental crisis because youre in this eternal circle of being sad - amplifying it because ur an attention whore - realising ur an attention whore - instead of stopping, u amplify THIS to feel absolutely terrible except not really because its not real or is it - now ur making urself look like the victim of realising ur not the victim. jesus fucking christ u stop thinking about it and it happens again a while later. just shut the fuck up, me. shut the fuck up. make my brain shut the fuck up,  i would literally probably cry happy tears if someone could make me shut the fuck up forever. or maybe i wouldnt but right now i feel like im gonna cry thinking about it. or its just placebo. or not placebo, the negative one. or idk. maybe i was right the first time i dont know. and now my back hurts cuz im like a little bug or whatever im just writing like. reversed arched. i dont know how to explain it lmao. i dont wanna read this thiing ever again but i most likely will! yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! be happy lol u knwo the meme thats like cmon work. idk what it was but the reference is in my brain and i feel like i could use it. and now i sound weird. well not weird im just going thru the thing i explained earlier in this thing. but i wont write abt it im just gonna not think about it bc that seems to work really well. felt the need to add ^^ as if im talking to someone or maybe making my thoughts talk to me rn like how i would talk to someone irl lmao.theyve actually been silent for a while so idk.

id title this “if im being honest” to like show im trying to get my rthoughts out with no real filtering but aaah idk. i dont wanna do it bc the title would be like. bigger and semibold and itd draw attention to  it. i want this to not be read by people but maybe someone will. i have like 2 or 3 people in mind who would maybe maybe maybe read this but i dont know. its really not anything so you shouldnt read it. maybe someone could skim this. is that how you say it. also there is some filtering of my thoughts because i dont wanna name anyone im not looking for trouble i just wanna talk into the void and feel better and maybe this is really it. i do feel kind of relaxed now. my uhhh wrists, yeah thats what theyre fcalled, they kinda hurt and my fingers dont hurt but like, the joints are very,,,accentuated? but not like visually they just. i can conciously feel them? and my throat and kinda eyes? thats bc of almost kinda crying but lol idk. and like ive always hated accentuated feelings and i read this thing on wikipedia about sensory overload and idk if its a normal thing that happens like when something stings or hurts or if its a symptom of something or i dont know but ive always kinda joked about it and its also related to tics. ticks? ticks. tics. and its not really what im feeling rn but its a thing that happens sometimes. kind of. but like when u walk up the stairs and u feel ur right leg has been doing/making more effort pushing u up than ur left leg and u try to balance out the effort and it can be hurtful i guess bc if something like an eye or arm hurts u try to balance out the pain and that can be bad dont do that but like i can do it bc i wont do it in bad scenarios. i went off track lololol sorry

this is kind of what my mind speeches and discourses look like so yeah i hope this goes unnoticed or someone notices it and i can just say nah dude im good trust me because i am i think and u should maybe probably trust me bc usually i have it better than everyone i talk to online or in real life so its fine if u trust me because its nothing to worry about really. ur precious and u desrrve more attention than whatever this thingy is. take care of yourself. the only thing ur allowed to think about this post if u read it (or not but like sure), according to my selfish brain, is that oh wow its cool that u tried mimicking (??) ur thoufhts and id be lioke yeah haha i dont even know whats wriitten in here anymroe im cool like that hahahhahahhhhhhhahha hehe hoho hihi you know. so dont feel anything else than indifference and maybe admiration. i wouldnt say the former if this were something i put thought into but it isnt so enjoy! honesty. kinda.

[apokine]

Anna told me to do the whole thing so here we are I guess

How did you choose your name? IDK I just wanted to still have a name that wasn’t like ~weird~ but still unique 

What gives you the most dysphoria? (Acknowledging that not all trans people experience dysphoria) even tho I got my tiddies removed i still feel kinda weird abt my chest if i’m not wearing a top lol…also a weird one but lipstick

Do you have more physical dysphoria or more social dysphoria? social maybe? it’s just sort of there all the time so

What do you do to perform self-care when you’re feeling dysphoric? what i always do when im feelin down - EAT LOTS OF FOOD

What was the first time you suspected you were transgender? uhhh i think the first time i suspected it as a like TANGIBLE THOUGHT was this one time when i was out w/ friends and had to go to the bathroom and i absolutely had an epiphany in the bathroom that i wasn’t a girl hahahahaha

When did you realize you were transgender? idk how this is different from the last one and i dont rly remember when it was that i like officially stopped thinking of myself as a girl

What is your favorite part of being transgender? other trans ppl probably. stay awesome, trans peeps

How would you explain your gender identity to others? mostly genderless, but i fluctuate around

How did you come out? If you didn’t come out, why do you stay in the closet? Or what happened when you were outed? im out w/ family/friends, who all found out in diff ways i guess? some ppl i just told, i also wrote stuff on tumblr & fb about it

What have your experiences with packing or wearing breast forms been? no experience with either lol 

What are your experiences with binding or tucking? binding sucked haha i defo wore my binder way more than i should have and got that Big Back Pain so i eventually mostly stopped and then got my bops chopped off

Do you pass? nahhh (is it even possible to pass as nonbinary??? question for another day)

What (if any) steps do you want to take to medically transition? got top surgery, idk abt hormones cuz i dont see myself as transmasc and am not interested in looking Very Masculine but i would like to look Less Feminine

How long have you been out? uhhhhhhh year a half maybe???????

What labels have you used before you’ve settled on your current set? none, tho i wouldnt say i’m particularly ‘settled’ haha

Have you ever experienced transphobia? sure have

What do you do when you have to go to the bathroom in public? usually the women’s restroom, sometimes mens if it is more convenient

How does your family feel about your trans identity? mixed reviews lol, some of my family is super supportive, some of them are like “why are you doing this” etc

Would you ever go stealth, and if you are stealth, why do you choose to be stealth? i mean i guess i’m stealth at work bc i worry abt my job

What do you wish you could have shared with your younger self about being trans? i wish that younger me just knew there were options i suppose

Why do you use the pronouns you use? I use they/them bc she/he felt too gendered for me and neopronouns just sound too strange to me personally. I respect and admire anybody that uses neopronouns bc those ppl are paving the way for future generations to have more options that are normalized tho. I just can’t do it myself cuz I have a big fear of standing out which is totally at odds with like everything I wanna be lol

Do your neurodivergencies affect your gender? i dont think so but who fuckin knows

What’s your biggest trans-related fear? NOBODY’S EVER GONNA LOVE ME

What medical, social, or personal steps have you already taken to start your transition? i feel like this has already been covered by previous questions

What do you wish cis people understood? that my gender isnt anybody’s business!! who cares!! 

What impact has being trans affected your life? idk honestly. dont know where to even begin trying to measure that

What do you do to validate yourself? well sometimes i like to argue with strangers on the internet 

How do you feel about trans representation in media? i love the increasing representation in the media and it makes me very happy to see being trans normalized and validated, but obviously there still just isnt enough good representation

Who is your favorite trans celebrity? angel haze maybe

Who is the transgender person who has influenced you the most? hmmm well i think that trans people i know irl are the ones who have given me the most courage. when i see other people come out or change their name or use they/them pronouns or WHATEVER i’m like “wow if they can do it i can too”.

How are you involved with the trans community, IRL or online? i wouldnt say im really involved w the community in any way aside from just being present here on tungle dot com

How do you see yourself identifying and presenting in 5 years? pretty much the same

What trans issue are you most passionate about? affordable & accessible healthcare!!! 

What advice would you give to other trans people, or what message would you like to share with them? hey buddy i did it (am doing it?) and so can you

How do you feel your gender interacts with your race, disability, class, weight, etc. from the perspective of intersectionality? i feel like skinny white androgynous ppl are the ‘default’ nonbinary ppl which sucks. i esp feel the weight thing bc i feel like it really prevents me from being seen the way i want to be seen. on the class front, i feel fortunate that can afford surgery and whatever else i need

What, if any, is the difference between your gender identity and your gender expression? i feel like my gender expression is super feminine to other people. but to me i feel like my expression is pretty much aligned w/ my identity  

Do you feel more masculine, feminine, or neither? neither

What is your sexual and romantic orientation, and what are your thoughts on it? sexual - idk i think i need somebody to figure it out and tell me. don’t really feel like labeling it right now, but sex is just not big for me. romantic - panromantic cuz i just like everybody. somehow much easier to figure out than my sexual orientation

Is your ideal partner also trans, or do you not have a preference? no preference tho if theyre cis they better not be a douchebag about it

How did/do you manage waiting to transition? honestly i’m a huge procrastinator LOLLL. as long as i keep telling myself ‘haha yeah it’ll happen eventually’ i’m just like ‘cool so i dont have to do it NOW…’ as long as i have the knowledge that it WILL happen im like..i can wait. If I think abt the possibility that it might not happen I freak the fuck out…for a bit I thought it might not be possible for me to get top surgery (due to medical issues) and I was in panic mode.

What is the place (blog, website, forum, IRL space) you get most of your info on being trans or on trans related things? idk i guess i learned a lot on tumbles

Do you interact with other trans people IRL? not super often, i mostly know trans ppl that are just like acquaintances or casual friends. our interaction is limited to liking each others instagram or facebook posts lol

Are you involved in any trans-related activism? nah tho i think it’d be cool

Free space! Answer any question you want, or make up your own question to answer. i refuse to make up my own question 

[artificialcats]

1 - 150

omg thanks answers under the cut bc this is going to b long

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

tbh dont even remember but ive never like, held hands w anyone ~romantically~ or w/e

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

SHY but i have my more outgoing moments every once in a while

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

Quinn!!! and my other friends and my sister back home :-) and my cat

4. Are you easy to get along with?

uhh idk? i guess?

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

tbh dont know 

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

nice ones. cute ones. ones interested in the same stuff as me ?

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

my friend did a tarot reading for me a week ago and when i asked if id have a gf this year the answer was not good lmao so doubtful

8. Who from another gender is on your mind?

idk?

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

im p indifferent

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

tbh my memory is garbage idk

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“signing tomorrow at 3:30″ cryptic out of context

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

the traveller- beach house (just walked to it in a fashion show! its good), boyfriend--best coast, sleepover--hayley kiyoko, forever (pt II)--snakehips, and a variety of tennis songs i cant choose from 

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

ya

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

not particularly

15. What good thing happened this summer?

last summer i got to do a bunch of fun stuff w different friends! 

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

ive never kissed anyone before LMAO (last “person” ive ever kissed was my cat on the head and ya id do that again)

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

I MEAN like the universe is so expansive theres no way theres NOT some other form of life out there 

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

lmao no 

19. Do you like bubble baths?

nah i dont like baths 

20. Do you like your neighbors?

at home yes (QUINN!!) and no (dont talk to anyone else) 

21. What are you bad habits?

nail picking, a lot of other stuff im too tired to list rn

22. Where would you like to travel?

would love to road trip it across the west

23. Do you have trust issues?

maybe? idk

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

moisturizing 

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

tbh feeling p good abt my body rn.. maybe my shoulders.. ive always disliked how square they r..

26. What do you do when you wake up?

p much immediately get in the shower

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

never thought abt it

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

my close friends

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

i dont have any exes

30. Do you ever want to get married?

maybe someday but not for a loooong long time

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

no

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

im ace so like,, none of them 

33. Spell your name with your chin.

losauirtfsa

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

nope. used to play tennis tho

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

probably tv. love music too much

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

HA ofc living that life rn

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

uh probably nothing

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

nice, supportive, is willing to dance around to/sing along w 70s/80s/2000s music w me 

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

thrift stores probably.. never know what youre going to find

40. What do you want to do after high school?

well rn im in college and thats p much what i was going for in high school so 

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

nah

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

probably just that i dont feel like talking? or im tired

43. Do you smile at strangers?

usually

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

outer space theres some whack stuff in the ocean

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

idk

46. What are you paranoid about?

a looot of things LMAO

47. Have you ever been high?

nope

48. Have you ever been drunk?

nope

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

no

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

grey

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

sometimes but usually just in like a ‘they look rlly cool’ or ‘i rlly like their style’ kind of way like just kind of envious

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

probably like, throwing my depression out the window

53. Favourite makeup brand?

dont wear makeup enough lmao

54. Favourite store?

tbh dont rlly have one also this is rlly similar to  previous question?

55. Favourite blog?

i love the househunting blog but idk if i rlly have a favorite

56. Favourite colour?

PINK

57. Favourite food? 

chicken bc theres so much good stuff u can do w it

58. Last thing you ate?

mini twix bar 

59. First thing you ate this morning?

eggs on toast

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

yea won a couple different ones for art related stuff

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

nope

62. Been arrested? For what?

nope

63. Ever been in love? 

platonically ya romantically no i dont think so

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

a short one: never happened

65. Are you hungry right now?

no ive been snacking all night lol

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

my tumblr friends p much are my rl friends so,, no

67. Facebook or Twitter?

twitter

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?

no

70. Names of your bestfriends? 

quinn

71. Craving something? What?

the sweet warm embrace of my bed

72. What colour are your towels?

one is pastel blue one is black/white/grey stripe

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

two

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

yea. i have a big pusheen plush and at home a mini dino pillow pet n a cat plush

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

like.. 3 i think? i used to have a L O T 

75. Favourite animal?

cats

76. What colour is your underwear?

black

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

once i had cardamom n it was rlly rlly good 

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

white w blue stripes

80. What colour pants?

jean overalls

81. Favourite tv show?

OOGH rn the getdown, stranger things, parks n rec, x files, downton abbey, charmed, a lot, 

82. Favourite movie?

jurassic park

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

neither

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

neither

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

dont have one

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

idk maybe nemo? never rlyl though abt it

87. First person you talked to today?

my mom

88. Last person you talked to today?

my sister

89. Name a person you hate?

idk

90. Name a person you love?

all my friends

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

not anyone i kno personally

92. In a fight with someone?

idk

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

like one pair and i never wear them lmao

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

a couple

95. Last movie you watched?

ella enchanted

96. Favourite actress?

no one comes to mind ?

97. Favourite actor?

idk jeff goldblum? 

98. Do you tan a lot?

no

99. Have any pets?

yes!! two cats

100. How are you feeling?

tired but ok

101. Do you type fast?

i think so yea

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

idk

103. Can you spell well?

im ok

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

kind of but i know we’re so different now we probably wouldnt even get along.. its not a miss i feel all the time tho more of a ‘we knew each other for so long its kind of sad we grew apart’

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

i want to say yes but it wasnt like a party party

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

not that i know

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yes

108. What should you be doing?

my homework 

109. Is something irritating you right now?

school. im ready to get out of here

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

i dont think so

111. Do you have trust issues?

wasnt this question already asked

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

my friend steph i think (over the final fantasy ending LMAO)

113. What was your childhood nickname?

i dont think i had one

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yea

115. Do you play the Wii?

not a lot no

116. Are you listening to music right now?

yep (rn its 0 to 100 by drake on shuffle)

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

not really. i like the broth tho

118. Do you like Chinese food?

ya

119. Favourite book?

aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

depends

121. Are you mean?

i try not to be

122. Is cheating ever okay?

nah

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

NO LMAO i have a bad habit of standing on my own feet my white shoes r so gross

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

idk

125. Do you believe in true love?

idk

126. Are you currently bored?

not rlly

127. What makes you happy?

my friends, cats, pink, good food, nature, making my own art, old houses n rooms, lots of stuff

128. Would you change your name?

never thought about it

129. What your zodiac sign?

aries

130. Do you like subway?

not rlly

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

what

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

im p sure this ? was already asked

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

134. Can you count to one million?

y

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

dont remember but lots of em

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed. i cant sleep w them open 

137. How tall are you?

5′10″

138. Curly or Straight hair?

i have straight hair

139. Brunette or Blonde?

im blonde? i dont kno if theses r refering to me or what i prefer on other people?

140. Summer or Winter? 

summer

141. Night or Day?

tbh a tie

142. Favourite month?

dont have one!

143. Are you a vegetarian?

no

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk

145. Tea or Coffee?

neither

146. Was today a good day?

it was ok

147. Mars or Snickers?

no preference

148. What’s your favourite quote?

dont have one

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

i mean i dont not believe in ghosts

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? 

“Grant said “what did you think?”” -Jurassic Park