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neutron-stars-collision · 3 years

Text

The Art of Inversion

Neil x Reader

Epilogue - The Look of Love

Masterlist; Chapter 31

Summary: Of dogs, proposals and other chaotic adventures. The end.

Warnings: Lethal doses of fluff; some hinted R-rated fun times; swearing.

Author's Notes: Well... this is it. The last chapter of the probably too long book that took me over a year to finish. It's been quite a journey and I'm grateful I took it and was brave enough to publish my work for the very first time.

I'm going to miss them, I know that for sure, so not saying no to some one-shots in near future... But for now, I hope you'll enjoy this last chapter. It's nothing too complex but I thought they needed closure so here it is.

Thank you to everyone who stayed from the beginning, to those who joined in between and those that stayed with me until the very end. Without you, your support, messages and existence I probably wouldn't have finished.

And thank you, Shet, for keeping up with my ramblings, weird plot bunnies, teasers at ungodly hours and just being there for me.

Enjoy the last hurrah (or something). And let me know what you think?

Life still sometimes felt unreal. Or, rather, the past year and a bit did. Because if years ago someone would describe the reality to the teenage version of you, she would laugh in their face. Or scoff and call it a pretty fairy tale. Nothing more, nothing less. Only, it wasn’t.

You parked the black Infiniti on your private spot in the courtyard and quickly crossed the distance to the building. Without thinking, you keyed in the code and pushed the suitcase through the door. Who knew business trips (missions) in Canada required so much stuff? With silent annoyance, you fished out the apartment keys from the overfilled messenger bag and waited for the elevator to arrive. There was no time to think through the short journey up or when opening the door to apartment no 4.

As soon as the lock clicked and the hinges creaked, you heard the unmistakable clatter of the dog’s paws on the wooden floors. You grinned, familiar reflexes helping you in lowering the bags and closing the door just in time as the black furball skidded around the corner into the hallway.

“Hello darling,” you cooed, kneeling to receive the impact from a comfortable position.

As the Labrador collided with you, he sat down and welcomed your embrace with an extensive dose of licking and wet nose. In return, you gave it a peck on the head and a few pats, smoothing down the fur and whispering sweet nothings.

Niki had entered your small family nearly four months ago, but both you and Neil knew that he belonged there.

And no, Niki wasn’t his full name. Nikola Tesla was. Named by Neil, naturally.

You bestowed a final quantity of pecks, kisses and hugs upon the dog and glanced at the cupboard below the hallway mirror. The notepad was still there, now filled with your and Neil’s writing. The pages majorly consisted of shopping lists, reminders, to-do notes and short letters to each other left in haste. The latest entry was made with Neil’s elegant handwriting:

‘Welcome home. There’s a gift for you in the living room. Text me when you arrive. Yours, N.

P.S. Last night, Nikola started munching on the copy of the Bible again. Beginning to think we should’ve named him Lucifer. Or Azazel’

You snickered, mind sending silent prayers to whoever decided to put Neil in your path. And make him fall in love with you. Somehow. As if on cue, the dog nudged your knee with his nose, making you drop the notepad and eye him warily:

“Dad says you’re the devil’s incarnate” Niki’s eyes lit up at the mention of Neil, tail wagging happily, “But I think he just hasn’t fed you well enough,” you added with a shrug and bent down to scratch him behind the ear.

Then the curiosity about said gift won. With purpose, you marched into the living room, eyes skimming over the usual mess of the space, cluttered with your books, albums, and everything else that you found the need for. Because neither of you was a lover of tidiness. You would rather maintain a manageable state of disarray in the apartment. And it worked. Even if sometimes it was particularly tricky to find whatever was necessary.

As your gaze fell on the table, you grinned. The enormous bouquet of white roses was certainly surprising yet more than welcome. The attached note was simple:

‘From your boys, who missed you greatly. Love xx’

It was gestures like those that made it impossible to have any regrets about the decisions you had made nearly a year ago. As you took out the phone to send the promised text to Neil, your heart flushed with warmth upon the sight of the home screen. A photo he sent you a couple of days ago – him and Niki sprawled out on the floor, smiling up at the phone camera. Neil had the halo of blonde hair around his head, Niki was in what you called the Batman pose – black triangle-shaped ears splayed on the floor over his head. The moment you received the image, you knew where its place would be.

“I’m back. Do you have any lunch plans?” you quickly typed the text and sat down on the sofa with a groan.

The unpacking and everything else could wait. At least a couple of hours longer.

When your phone beeped less than a minute later, you smiled. It seemed that old habits did indeed die hard, for Neil still replied to your messages with the speed of light. No matter whether he was in the meeting, lecturing recruits or otherwise busy with work, he always texted you back immediately. It was something you often teased him about while being equally charmed by the habit.

“You’re my lunch plans ;)” the grin only got brighter when you read the response, cheeks flushing pink at the influx of thoughts and memories.

Flirting never got old. Neither did everything it would bring you, the endless nights and tender afternoons. Or energetic mornings, placing blush on your cheeks and a sparkle in your eyes.

“That sounds… intriguing” after a second thought, you added 😏and hit send.

The rush of adrenaline could only be blamed on jet lag. And love.

“And so it should. Fave spot in an hour?”

Favourite spot meant the café you had met at. It became a regularly frequented destination after the return from Trondheim, both due to the overwhelming feeling of nostalgia and gratitude. But also because of the perfectly served coffee.

You glanced at the watch, noting the time and distance you’d need to cover. Manageable. A tiny squeak from below your eye line drew the attention before you could text him back. The dark amber eyes, looking at you pleadingly. What would lunch be without the youngest family member, huh?

“Perfect. I’ll bring Niki” you made a face at the dog and got up.

No time to waste.

***

The square was busy during lunchtime, flooded with white collars and black heels. The corporation chatter welcomed you from every corner as you led Niki to the table on the outskirts. The same one, naturally. With the force of habit, your eyes wandered over the scene, taking in the busy waiters, stressed clients and their business meetings taking place around the tables.

Every time you sat down in the café, memories were hard to control. It was always a similar variety of images and sensations. The grey of Neil’s suit that first day, the tone of his voice, the warmth of his hand, the blue of his eyes. Was it ever avoidable? Doubtful. Even the suggestion seemed like a joke because if Neil had to be described by one word, it would be incredible. And you should never turn your back on what seems too good to be true. Or so a dear friend told you.

Suddenly Niki leapt up, and the leash stretched, yanking your chair to the right by a centimetre. Before you could look up to acknowledge the cause, a familiar voice rang out over your head:

“What’s a beautiful woman like you doing around these parts?” Neil drawled out the question with a playful tint to the vowels.

A grin invited itself onto your face as you glanced up, effortlessly meeting the blue of his eyes. The desire to roll your eyes was still there yet not as strong. After all, the cheesy pick-up lines were easy to get used to. The lips curled into a soft smile, one hand reaching out to greet the dog, the other placed on the back of your chair. The hair tousled by the wind added a little bit more to the overall charm. He was infuriatingly handsome.

“Waiting for an idiot of a boyfriend, I’ve found myself,” you shrugged, scanning him from head to toe in an attempt to find a flaw.

That was a tricky job when faced with Neil dressed up in black leather and a dark green jumper. He waited for your appreciative nod before letting his fingers ghost up the curve of your neck. The sigh was unnecessary yet unavoidable.

“He’s a lucky man” Neil cupped your cheek and lowered down the voice to a whisper.

That meant the silly opening was over, and you have moved on to the sincere conversation. The profound ground, the foundation of the relationship itself. Slipping back into the role felt like a true homecoming. As if the act of coming back to the apartment was the prologue for the quintessence of your life. You leaned into his touch and dropped down the guard, allowing the feelings to paint across your features.

“And I’m a lucky woman,” you added, the smile softening as the simple honesty appeared on the tip of your tongue, “I’ve missed you” encircling your hand around his wrist, you pulled Neil down to get closer.

He yielded without a fight, leaning down to breach the space. Neither of you cared about the public, being used to curious and offended stares as you indulged in PDA on the streets of London and elsewhere. It seemed that along with the increase of confidence in your feelings for one another, you lost the ability to be concerned by what others think. Unless the other in question was Neil. Then it mattered a lot.

When he was this close, faces separated by mere inches, the flock of butterflies never failed to wake up, making your heart speed up and happiness soar. Because he was there, yours and within reach. And that was all it took to close the gap, enveloping his mouth in a hungry kiss. Soft lips, responding to yours in an instant, the familiar taste waking up the desire. Following the instincts, you buried your fingers in his hair, angling his head for better access. Neil let out a muffled sigh and opened his mouth under your prying tongue. That was your method of proving everything you ever told him, every sentiment and confession confirmed by the tender caress and the ravenous kiss. And then he responded in kind, teeth catching your lower lip and pulling at it softly to avoid bruises yet enough to make you want more. But it had to wait for the privacy of your bedroom.

When you broke apart with the heavy breaths punctuating the silence, Neil placed a kiss on your forehead and murmured:

“Quite right,” he nudged your nose with his, a happy glimmer in his eyes shadowed with uncontainable affection, “Had no one to kiss me like this for three weeks” his lips curled into a smirk as he straightened and sat down in the opposite chair.

In a flash, Niki was by his side, pushing his head into Neil’s lap and begging for attention. You grinned at the sight, feeling nothing but content fill every space in your heart. And then, just for the sake of it, you glared at Neil across the table:

“I sure hope so, sunshine” arching one eyebrow, you flipped the menu open with a flourish.

Another habit learned from the man in question.

There was hardly any reason to browse the coffee options since as soon as the waitress approached your table (and petted the dog), Neil ordered for you. You stopped putting up the fight about it and instead accepted the fate with an exasperated sigh and a fond eye roll. Because he always chose right and exerted the right to be smug about it.

It was a good half hour later, with many catch up conversations in between the jokes and shameful staring, that Neil took hold of your hand lying on the table and spoke up:

“Yesterday, I was giving a talk to the new recruits” he eyed you steadily, fingers running over your knuckles reassuringly.

Both you and Neil have been deployed to train the agents between missions following Stalsk. In his case, it meant lectures about physics or using years of experience to lead the rookies through more tricky operations from the past. Every single of those talks also meant another thing…

“How was it? Ladies and gents fawning over you as usual?” batting your eyelashes, you looked up at him flirtatiously in the best imitation of the looks you have seen him receive.

And it was always like this. Conspicuous ogling, amorous smiles, and excited whispers. More than once, you have heard the younger agents gossip about Neil as you passed them in the corridor. Sometimes the conversations died the moment you have been spotted. Others grew louder as if to challenge you and show that your position as the girlfriend of the most desired man in Tenet should not be taken for granted.

And it was not, permanent anxiety could not allow you that kind of luxury.

“... well yeah, but-” your stream of thoughts was interrupted by Neil, his face nothing but outrage as if you have been simplifying things, and he would not have it.

But it was too late, you had been triggered. A little, nothing too dramatic.

A scoff, a dismissive wave of a hand and off you went into a tirade you had long prepared:

“They’re so predictable. You can practically see their eyes lit up once they see you” you threw Neil another hungry look, taking note of the widened eyes and shock in his face “Wonder how many have gotten sexuality crisis because of those eyes and golden locks” taking the hand out of his hold to brush away the hair from his forehead and skim your fingers across his temples. If only because you could.

But Neil was having none of that pretence. He grabbed your wrist in one quick motion, pinning your hand to the table with an exasperated sigh:

“Very funny” the glare you received was everything but funny; you opened your mouth to protest but never got that far “What I wanted to say before you so rudely interrupted me is that afterwards, as I was packing my stuff, I could hear Ives pointedly tell them that I’m off the books so, quote, don’t fucking bother” Neil’s gaze had you frozen with the mind trying to process what he said.

It might’ve been obvious. But not to you. Not to someone who still found reasons to doubt their luck.

“Oh,” you let out a long exhale, never quite realising when Neil’s eyes softened or when your fingers laced up once more.

You stared at your hands resting on the table, head catching up with the reality as it often had to. Because it was true, it was happening. Neil was yours, exclusively. It was not a daydream or wishful thinking.

Being well accustomed to your moments of ‘silliness’ as he called it, Neil stayed quiet, watching you closely until he knew that it was safe to push on with the intended meaning:

“He’s right, obviously because no one could even dare compare with you” as his words broke the silence, you looked up and met his gaze.

Nothing but love and fondness. The blue pupils, sparkling with happiness and conviction, thumb running over your knuckles in unconscious motions. Yet there was one more question you had to ask:

“You sure about that?” the attempt at an intense glare got blown by Niki pushing his nose into your lap.

Obediently you scratched him under the chin, taking pleasure in the sensation of the short hairs under your fingernails and the weight of his head on your lap. You did not need that escape for long. Neil squeezed your hand once to draw attention and smiled when you glanced up at him:

“Yes. There’s only one person I’m planning to marry, and that is you” letting go, he pointed at you with unnecessary quirkiness and quickly downed the coffee before you could shake off the gesture.

There it was again, that subtle and smooth mention of marriage. Reminding you that Neil wanted it and had not abandoned the idea, deeming you inadequate wife material. Your pulse picked up as blood rushed into your ears. It was always like this. A mere remark had the potential to resolve you into a blushing, wide-eyed mess incapable of eloquent speech. Why? Because it was too good to be true. Simple.

With panic gaining strength, your eyes were drawn to the silver charms bracelet on Neil’s wrist. It was a gift from you for his birthday, the first one you celebrated together. You have chosen the charms to signify the things you loved about him and the cherished memories, hoping to add to the collection as time went on. So far, the pendants included the Norwegian flag (Oslo was hardly forgettable), a Labrador (newest addition), stars (you know, physics and… shit), the infinity symbol (aren’t we stuck in a time loop?) and, soppiest of all, a daffodil (wisdom, but also, you’re the one). Until the moment you presented the gift to him, you worried Neil would never wear it.

But he did. He only took it off for missions, offended you could think he would not want it. Apparently, it was the best present he had ever received.

Now your silence lasted too long for the next thing you felt was a gentle touch, fingers tipping your chin so you would have to meet the intense gaze. There was nowhere to hide. Blue eyes searched yours for answers, and then Neil found what he needed. He cupped your cheek once more and sat up straighter:

“I couldn’t care less about everyone else, and deep down, you know it” it was the quiet confidence in his voice that made the breath catch in your throat, “Actually, I was thinking, if you’d marry me, we could-” it was also why at first you missed what he said.

And then exhaled as your conscience registered the words. It was not exactly a question. But it was an assumption. An indirect query. What?

“… did you just propose?” cutting through his intended sentence, you dropped the spoon with a clink.

It fell off the saucer, dripping coffee over the wooden surface. But that was the least of your concerns. Fearing to do as much as breathe out, you waited for Neil to wake up from the confusion. He blinked twice and then eyed you tentatively:

“… maybe” another second of cautious silence before he followed it with a hurried explanation, “I mean, I wanted to for a while, but-”

You did not need to hear it. Not really. And there was nothing to debate. You barely registered the movement underneath the table as Niki clambered up to seek more attention. Bad timing.

“Yes,” you whispered the word with eyes closed.

Like one utters the birthday wish when blowing out the candles. Like a silent prayer by the altar. When you opened your eyes again, Neil was staring at you with slight disorientation written over his face:

“What?” his eyebrows drew together as they did whenever he was at a loss.

It was the sudden increase of happiness that made you keen to tease him. You eyed the remains of beverage in your cup and then looked up at him sternly:

“I said yes. Unless you’re taking it back, in which case I’ll slap you and pour that coffee on your head” in support of the threat, you raised the cup and tipped it experimentally.

A hint of a smile upon Neil��s lips acted like a trigger. You grinned, euphoric giggles rising in your throat and tinting the tongue. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Niki stare at you both with a blank gaze. Sure as hell, parents were acting weird. Not that, usually, they were normal, though.

Neil tapped your hand once, a familiar gesture proceeding something profound and important. You looked up in time to see him observe you with unhidden admiration. As if he did not believe you were real.

“Christ, I love you,” Neil whispered his confession with eyes shining brightly and a dazed smile on his face.

For reasons hard to comprehend, the moment felt monumental. Because this was it. It happened in a strange yet wonderful way. You effortlessly mirrored his smile and placed the cup back on the saucer:

“… I hope so” a tiny shrug to hide the extent of happiness coursing through your veins “It would be a terrible loss of a perfectly good coffee” you sensed more than saw Neil shift in the chair; instincts telling you what it could mean “Don’t you dare” extending a hand in the universal signal for ‘stop whatever the fuck you’re doing’ and glaring at him hard.

In the quiet of your mind, you could see it. Neil kneeling right there in the café, causing fatal damage to your sanity. People rushing to congratulate you. Photos being taken. Niki jumping up in the excitement of what he did not even understand. Worst nightmare.

When you looked up at him, Neil was quietly laughing at the horror visible in your face. He could read you like a book by now. And somehow, it was not scary. Breaching the dramatic impasse, Neil reached out for your hand lying on the table and sent you another soft smile:

“I’ll do it properly back in the apartment, and then we’ll celebrate...” the sparks in his eyes promised more than words ever could.

The only thing left was to do was to blush and- Again, what?

You let out another long exhale to ground the mind and sputtered:

“Wait... does that- does that mean you’ve got the ring and all?” your hands flapped around wildly, attracting your dog, who chose the moment to try jump up to the table.

At the last moment, before Niki collided with the table leg, Neil snatched him away and nodded energetically:

“Yeah,” running his fingers over your knuckles and the ring from Norway you never took off, “As I said, I thought about proposing for the last few months” his mouth curled into a crooked grin as he relived a particular memory, “Remember that day when you came back from Italy? And we spent the afternoon in bed?” the look Neil gave you was as far from PG13 as you could imagine.

But of course, you remembered. Two weeks in northern Italy, discovering a weapon’s dealer ploy by the Lake Como. And then home, coming back to find Neil cooking dinner. Only you never got to eat it that day.

“How could I forget” biting into your lip to prevent idiotic smiles, you whispered the answer.

Neil raised your hand to his lips and kissed it, never once breaking the eye contact:

“Well, that was one of the moments when I thought about it. You looked so beautiful, completely spent and utterly mine” another squeeze of palm and a response to what must have been a terribly stunned look in your eyes, “I remembered what you told me the icebreaker. So, despite knowing that nothing was going to change, I waited for the right moment. Exactly how you wanted”

A shrug. Because it was all so simple. And maybe it was.

You made sure he could see the whole spectrum of emotions in your eyes as you murmured:

“Neil… take me home,”

***

By the time you got home and dealt with the mess left there, you nearly forgot about what happened. Or that was about to happen. The specifics were even more complex to determine. You went about your tasks as always: wheel the suitcase to the closet, deposit the dirty clothes in the laundry bin and change into joggers. Because the consensus seemed to be that you would spend the rest of the day in. Celebrating. Which meant… fun. You allowed yourself one silly grin in the bathroom mirror before exiting into the hall. From the kitchen, you could hear the unmistakable sounds of Neil preparing Niki’s food.

The soft voice he used when talking to the dog was a fascinating discovery. The first time you heard it, you only managed to calm down enough to finish the work Zoom call and then promptly crossed the distance to snog Neil for around five minutes.

Now, as you quietly tiptoed into the living space, he had just placed Niki’s bowl on the designated spot by the wall and watched with a smile as the Labrador dug into the food with the speed of lightning. You enjoyed observing him in those moments of silence and stagnation. Whether bowed down over the complex notes and theorems or watching the dog snoring on the blanket, Neil seemed to you a shining beacon of hope. A home in the form of a person who always made you feel safe and grounded.

Too lost in the thoughts (and admiration), you never quite caught the moment when the man in question turned to you. Or when he crossed the space. The wake-up call was a gentle touch on your shoulder, making you look up into his eyes with a start:

“Think we were supposed to finish something…” Neil glanced at the red velvet box he produced out of somewhere with a confident smile on his face.

Oh. Shaking yourself awake, you mirrored his expression before leaning in to place a kiss on his temple.

“Right, yeah. Sorry” your face warmed up a notch as you felt the familiar surge of butterflies in your stomach.

Inexplicable tension filled the moment as Neil nodded, squeezed your hand once and started lowering down to kneel on the hardwood floors. Of course.

“You don’t have to do it with such a-”

Your protest got cut off at the end with a confused stare and a simple question:

“What?” Neil was now resting on one knee in what you always considered as the formal engagement pose.

While you were standing in front of him wearing nothing more elegant than a pair of old stained joggers and his t-shirt you stole months before. That realisation was the main driving force behind your frown and the one-worded response you had for him:

“Pomp,” popping the p with overt nonchalance, you eyed him sharply.

You knew Neil was set off from the second you saw the familiar sparks in his eyes lit up. No doubt you were in for a one in a million proposal there. A third one, in fact.

“Darling, love of my life-” the nicknames rolled off his tongue with ease coupled up with the extravagant way in which he opened the box.

An exasperated sigh there, bored shuffle here. And cutting in before Neil could make it somehow even worse:

“That’s what I meant” you frowned at the scene, pose hiding the feelings flowing through your body.

Nearly there. Because despite the banter and the desire to make this as lighthearted as you could, the importance was undeniable. With wonder, your gaze skimmed over Neil, his sparkling blue eyes, and a soft smile, kneeling at your feet. You took a deep breath.

“- will you marry me?” he finished the question with a slight tremor in his voice.

Yes. There was no other answer. There could not be.

The grin got out before words did, making you both exhale with audible relief. And then, perfectly choosing the moment to step in, Niki skidded down the length of the floor and collided with Neil. Face licks were the top priority there, seeing as dad found himself in the dog’s territory. Bursting out into carefree giggles, you could only utter one word in response:

“Obviously,” and then, for the sake of spite and chitchat, you added, “Sunshine, my beloved idiot, you,” finally, reaching out to bop his nose with your finger.

Followed by doing the same thing to the Labrador, still happily occupied with covering his owner’s neck and face with saliva. Upon your verbal attack, Neil winced:

“Okay, maybe I overdid it,” his face scrunched up in a second of thoughtful pause, “A bit,” the flirtatious wink completing the sentence perfectly.

“A little,” you breathed out the agreement before letting yourself look at the ring still held in its box.

A white opal stone was set within a circle of crystals, attached to a white gold band. You never did daydream about an ideal engagement ring, too worried it would either never happen or that it could spoil the expectations. Yet, if you had to picture one, it would look like this. A genuine smile lit up your face, making Neil beam in response. He waited for your nod before gently cradling your right palm between his hands and putting the ring on its designated finger. All thanks to your fiddling in the car, which resulted in moving the Trondheim ring onto the other hand.

Then Neil stood up (leaving terribly disappointed Niki on the floor) and wound an arm around your waist, pulling you close. And stealing the breath from your lungs, as usual.

“I really do love you, you know?” he nudged your nose with his, the wisp of air falling teasingly on your lips.

Following the intuition like a dance routine learned by heart, you placed your hand on his chest and returned the nudge with a playful smile dangling off the corner of your mouth.

“Mmmm, I’ve had inklings that you might” as Neil’s smile widened, you used the second of hesitation to entangle your hand and pull him closer, “I love you,” a whisper of something you did not need to say yet wanted to “Too” an addition drawing out a laugh from his lips.

And then you reached out for a kiss, raising on your tiptoes to cover his mouth with yours. Slowly gliding over his lips, tasting home, and fulfilling the needs as well as adding fuel to the fire that never died down anymore. Neil responded in kind, pulling you flush against him and submitting to your tempo. Your tongues found each other with ease, curling around one another, increasing the hunger flowing in your veins. As one kiss ended another began. And then one more. More. It was impossible to stop.

Neil’s hands moved down to your hips, gently guiding you backwards out of the room. You knew the destination without ever needing to open your eyes. An excited giggle rose in your throat and broke the silence, giving you both a pause to take a deep breath. Neil kissed you again, mindless of the way your hands wandered underneath his shirt and began the exploration of the already conquered territory. Yours.

It was once you crossed the bedroom threshold that you broke apart. The same desire, burning in your eyes, the hunger, exposed in the eager hands and heavy breaths. The giddy atmosphere almost palpable. Neil pushed the door close without a word and turned to face you. There was no need to speak as your hands found each other again. The familiar moves lighting up the spark, connected gazes showing all that has been said before and will be again. The wedding vows exchanged for the first time with the sanctity of love, underlining every motion and beat of the heart. Every sigh, shiver and moan demonstrated the ultimate truth - I am his, and he is mine. That simple.

***

An event of that scale was difficult to process. That is why you were not surprised, when as early as the next day, you started to struggle with pretending that nothing happened. Sure, the very morning (and waking up in Neil’s arms as always) was pleasant. As was breakfast and arrival at the London branch of Tenet hand-in-hand with your fiancé.

No one noticed the new ring gracing your hand during the debrief after the Canadian mission. Or when you led the seminar with recruits concerning the potentials of inverted nuclear weapons. However, when you missed the fifth target in a row during your weekly shooting range rendezvous with Ives, you knew that it would not be ignored.

You felt his glare before you saw it, weighting you down by at least a kilogram. Hesitantly shifting, you chose to put the gun down and lower the earmuffs, awaiting questions. And you were right:

“Okay, what’s wrong? Because you never miss a target like that” the accusatory tone made you turn to look at the soldier.

With the safe option waiting at hand, you arched an eyebrow and raised your right palm over the shoulder. The dependable tremors never failed you as the hand shook slightly on its own accord, helping to push the lie home.

“Oh, you know… this body ain’t perfect since a Russian soldier shot me in the-” feigning nonchalance, you watched as your fingers trembled.

And partially, it was true. Since Stalsk, you were much worse at hitting the targets, let alone a sharpshooter like before. Hence the weekly practice and hours upon hours of getting used to the weakness and trying to turn it into an asset.

But Ives did not buy this one dose of bullshit, increasing the ferocity of the glare he placed on you. Fine. You let out a long sigh before letting the façade drop from your face.

“Neil. He...” as your eyes got stuck on the engagement ring, the voice froze in your throat.

“What did the blonde bastard do this time?” you heard Ives put down the gun and looked up in time to see him eye you closely.

“He proposed. Yesterday. Over coffee in that cafe where we first met,” one word after another, you answered the question and met his gaze cautiously.

For reasons impossible to explain, you felt a rush of tension. It was as though once you had admitted the truth to someone else, it became even more real. And with it came the anxieties you long tried to hide.

Ives cracked a genuine smile, wordlessly reaching out for your right hand to look at the ring:

“Finally,” he gave it an appreciative nod before giving you a quick once-over, “What’s that look?”

Bingo. You heaved another sigh as the thoughts swirled in your head, too chaotic to be worth mentioning. And yet, this was probably the only chance. Slowly, you let your heart pour out its honesty:

“It’s just… I guess I’m shocked because I did tell him to ask me again when we don’t have world-ending prevention on our to-do list... I did worry he would change his mind” there it is.

You frowned as the truth landed in the silent room. It has been over a year since you had that first conversation with Neil about getting married. And you never did once doubt him or your relationship. Yet, anxiety with the mind of its own was not as sure. Occasionally adding sparks to the eternal debate and fuelling the questions. Because what if he would get tired of you? What then?

But he didn’t. Or, at least, it did not seem so. When you met Ives’s gaze once more, you could spot exasperation there:

“Are you kidding me?” exaggerating the question, he gave you a little disappointed headshake “He’s mad about you, completely committed. I’m wondering what took him so long” the meaningful look told you that the very next thing Ives is going to do will be asking Neil.

Without a second wasted, you knew you would rather not be present during that conversation. Not for the possibility of hearing something heartbreaking but for the lethal doses of awkwardness that would no doubt result from it.

“I think sometimes he doesn’t believe I want him like that,” you murmured using the companionable silence to speak your mind, “But then he’s an idiot,” the disclaimer added with a tight smile on your lips.

Both statements were true. Neil was an idiot, and you knew he still sometimes questioned your desire to be with him. Again, not because of distrust but, rather, a surprising lack of confidence that you never expected.

Ives shook his head, throwing out a remark with glaring disbelief:

“You’re really a perfect match,” and then, to lighten up the strangely sombre mood, he asked, “So… when’s the wedding?”

Thanks. It was the perfect opportunity to tell anxiety to fuck off and wander into the dream world you have not yet known how to navigate. Because it has only been twenty-four hours. A long way to go. It was your turn to glare at the soldier:

“Ives, I’ve only just said yes. Now there’s organising, paperwork and a shitload of decisions to take” the mere idea of how much you would have to deal with made your head spin, “We’ll send you an invite, though,”

“You better,” a final warning coupled with a wink.

Before you had to find an appropriate response, the doors to the shooting range opened with a bang. Both of you turned at the sound in time to see Wheeler step in with a weirdly enthusiastic spring in her step:

“Guys, you won’t believe it-” she never got to finish the sentence.

Ives snatched your right palm and raised it so that the ring was in Wheeler’s face:

“Our lovebirds got engaged” he looked at you proudly before throwing a cheeky smile at the fellow soldier, “Got you one better, didn’t I?” the challenge was clear.

That surprised her. You watched as Wheeler blinked twice, desperate to understand what just transpired. Then she squeezed your hand and smiled:

“Congrats”

You grinned back, returning the squeeze before asking:

“Thanks. What’s the news, boss?” the wince at the title was another reason to keep using it.

Because despite her dislike of the formalities, Wheeler was the leader of Tenet. And that was something you wanted to highlight on every given occasion. If only to irk her.

The joy from the usual banter did not last long, for she chose to drop the revelation without an opener:

“Anna and Jasper are dating. I just saw them making out in one of the empty rooms” she dropped her voice to a conspiratorial whisper, and you both bowed down to hear her better.

Wow. There was no denying the shock that passed through your system. Because you never saw that coming. And yet, it made sense if thought about at length.

“Oh,” the sound was all you could manage before taking out the phone from your pocket and adding “I’ve got to tell Neil,”

You could just about picture his face when he read the text you quickly typed out. Just as you sent the message, Ives mused out loud:

“Now that’s a love story for the ages. Forget about your little… thing already” he made a vague hand gesture towards you.

But your mind was elsewhere as soon as the phone buzzed:

“I didn’t see that one coming. Good for them tho” and then “See you at 5ish at home?”

“Yup. To both” grinning widely, you got as far as opening the work schedule before you got another text:

“Do you think now we can invite them to the wedding? Or is that too much?”

There was no logical explanation for that burst of laughter.

***

It was one of those painfully ordinary nights. Late work needing finishing, plus Neil participating in a teleconference past midnight meant occupying the dining table and him locked in the bedroom. Which was fine. Only, as you have finally managed to close the laptop and tick off the task list, the thoughts were not as keen to stop. A minute sat in perfect silence, listening to Niki’s snores, and trying to quiet down the brain was enough to let you know that it was not happening. At least not yet.

With a sigh, you opened the balcony door and slipped outside as quietly as possible. As soon as the air hit your body, you wrapped the cardigan tighter. The early May nights were often like this – not too cold and not warm either. Your gaze lazily swept over the familiar scene: the riverside, walkway, hundreds and thousands of London houses and skyscrapers piercing the skyline. The air was crisp with the night breeze, rustling the trees and blushing your cheeks. Propped on the railing, you let your head bow down for a moment, letting the swirling thoughts engulf you within their chaos. Tenet, danger, fear, Neil, wedding, future. It was all there and more. With only a week since the engagement, you did not have time to talk about the specifics of the metaphorical tying of the knot. But still, it did take up space in your head, endlessly painting itself as though a dream, impossible to be true. Let alone about to be your future. Surely you couldn’t get that lucky, right?

The answer from your brain got cut short with the sound of the door behind opening and closing. Then a warm wisp of air down your neck, bringing a shy small to your face and a sigh of relief to your throat. Neil leant down to place a kiss on the tip of your ear and moved to stand beside you. Shoulders and hips, touching, yet the space preserved to offer whatever you needed. More reasons to love him all there.

Even if lack of the shirt made your eyebrows draw together. A sight, sure, always. But not in this weather.

“What’s up?” he glanced at you; the tint of worry masked up with casualness to assure you would not put up a guard.

You allowed yourself a heavy sigh as a prelude to the answer:

“Finished work, started thinking and… here we are” a shrug, knowing he understood the issue and then added, “You can go to sleep though,” nudging him gently in the shoulder, you offered another smile.

Because it would be selfish to keep him here in the cold only for the sake of your stupid and rather pathetic issues. You knew the case was lost the moment your gazes met, and you saw the sparks in his eyes.

“Nah, think I’ll pass for now” that was the agent of chaos speaking, mouth curled into a smirk, tousled hair adding more of that boyish allure you adored.

There was no point arguing when he was that cocky. Instead, you breached the space to run your fingers up his arm and over the collarbone, watching as the moonlight played upon his skin and waiting for the shiver that always came. When your hand was just inches above his heart, Neil trembled. There it is. A satisfied grin appeared on your face as you quickly leaned back.

“You’ll catch a cold wandering around shirtless,” the note given in the best tone of chastising you could muster.

But the cold treatment was gone the moment Neil turned to you and deadpanned:

“I’ll take my chances if that means talking to you a little longer” a wink finished the sentence along with a hand squeeze, again subtly breaking the barrier.

You could barely stop yourself from facepalming.

“Christ, you’re such a charmer,” a glare had to do instead.

Neil shrugged, the expression very familiar. You knew what you had signed up for? You got it.

And you did know. Even if sometimes it was impossibly hard to believe.

Allowing the silence to settle upon the balcony, you inched closer to Neil and let your head fall on his shoulder. The storm was easing, and all you needed now was distraction and closeness. Finally, after a long pause, an innocent question wandered into the forefront of your mind and placed itself on the tip of your tongue:

“When did you know?” your voice sounded small as it rang out in the quiet space.

But there was no need to explain the meaning. You felt Neil glance down before he pressed a quick kiss to the top of your head and cleared his throat:

“New York, just before the kiss. Call it silly, but that moment seemed like one of those when stars align” he chuckled lowly, and you looked up in time to see the faint blush on his cheeks, “There you were with your beauty, charisma, humour, and wits. You fascinated me, drew me in and made me want to understand you. Every curve of your mouth, every gesture, silence, sigh, and desire” your gazes met, the earnestness in his eyes caught you by surprise as your breath hitched “And then I kissed you. I knew I could never forget how it felt” the punchline came with an honest smile and a quick pulse pounding in your ears.

Love. Love. Love.

You felt like bursting into tears and throwing your hands around his neck in the tightest of embraces. But instead, you cracked a grin and arched an eyebrow, taking pleasure in how Neil seemed incapable of looking away from you.

“My God, I’m marrying a poet,” nudging him lightly in the shoulder, you made sure to dramatise the tone best you could.

The answering smile was the reward you needed as Neil chimed in:

“And a physicist,” the faux seriousness lightening up the atmosphere and making you break out into a laugh.

“2 in 1, best deal around,” raising your voice with enthusiasm, you patted him on the shoulder before letting Neil draw you into the side hug.

With his response to the question still ringing in your ears, it was easy to relax and ease the strange anxiety. Because it meant he had a lot of time to change his mind yet never did. But you were not given too much opportunity to ponder about it for a long time.

“When did you know?” the emphasis made you look up straight into Neil’s eyes as he repeated the question.

You could tell that he was curious rather than just determined to make you return the confession. It was that revelation that prompted the simple request:

“Come here…” gently you tugged at his hand to make Neil embrace you tighter and put his hand on your waist; then a simple answer “Oslo” the corner of your lip curled upward as the memories flashed through your head.

No doubts about that. Even if at the time you were not so keen to admit it, if thought about in retrospect, it was obvious. Because how else would one even explain the way those days felt?

“Handiwork skills?” Neil wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, glancing down at his left hand clasped in yours.

The furious blush was inescapable. Right on track. Deflecting the shyness, you chose to squeeze Neil’s palm tighter and answer with stark honesty:

“That too” a wink to compliment the admission before you followed the more profound line of thought “But also how you looked at me, how you held my hand, how you kissed me. I could feel it there, during every second spent in your company” stopping to take a long inhale you almost got lost in Neil’s eyes, drinking every word you said “And I wanted more, of you, your words, and your presence. I never felt like that before” the conclusion fell between you with monumental silence even though it was nothing new “Sometimes it terrifies me” breathing out the addition, you got caught by the love in his eyes.

“Why?” and a tinge of curiosity.

That was the needed trigger to help you turn in the embrace and face Neil with your back against the railing. You did not need more than the dim city lights and the moon to make out the familiar features. And the gaze focused only on you. As though you were the centre of his universe.

“Because of the power you have over me. You can reduce me to shivers and consuming need within ten minutes of the right moves” with a small smile, you let your finger run up his arm and down the chest, feeling the warmth and relishing in the reactions he did not bother to hide.

Neil grinned as his hand slid down to your hip, thumb brushing the skin underneath the shirt:

“Ten minutes? I’d say five” the challenging sparks in his eyes told you that the course had been set.

And you might as well obey.

“Oh, so confident,” eyeing him sceptically, your hands wandered over his torso, getting braver in their exploration.

The hint of the heartbeat, the strong arms, embracing you in the cage of safety, the feel of home and happiness. As your courageous fingers skimmed over his ribs and curled around the belt loops, Neil raised his hand to trace down the slope of your nose, hesitating just above the lip line:

“Because I know you inside and out,” the confidence was infuriating even if earned, “I can’t wait to use that knowledge for better or worse,” as was the promise of much more in his eyes.

Feeling the impatience building up in your heart, you reached out to tangle your hand in Neil’s hair. Because if the past year taught you anything, it was that Neil had his weaknesses. Namely, you and…

“Says the man with hair pulling kink” tugging at the blonde strands forcefully, you observed with satisfaction how he swallowed hard, and his lips opened to let out a shallow gasp “That good?” the moment he seemed to become even more earnest, you let go and offered him your smirk in return.

The passing shock combined with a frustrated whine was undoubtedly worth it. However, it did not last long.

“You’re such a tease, my love” Neil bopped your nose before you could react and once more wound his arms around your waist.

“Learned from the best,” shrugging, you rose on tiptoes to take advantage of the proximity.

As your mouth pressed against his, Neil opened his lips to deepen the contact and pulled you closer. It was easy enough to forget about the cold and the world itself when kissing him. Because it always felt like so much more. Like a wordless exchange of love confessions. Like a morning full of hope for the life ahead. Like being understood and wanted. Like everything you did not even know, you were seeking yet found in the man with a dazzling smile and sea-blue eyes. Neil tangled his hand in your hair, smoothing down the strands and angling your head to get that perfect access. And then he traced the outline of your mouth his tongue before sinking his teeth into your lower lip and pulling at it lightly. You let out a quiet moan and laced your fingers on the nape of his neck. It was only when the kisses threatened to get a little too intense that you backed away with an apologetic smile.

There was still something you needed to say. Shifting a little to rest your hip against the railing yet still gaze up at Neil, you allowed the words to come through without hesitation:

“These days, I can’t sometimes believe this is real. I live this life, yet it seems so… dream-like” your smile widened when Neil covered your hand resting on the balustrade with his palm.

You never expected the evening to evolve into sincere conversations in the dark. However, you were not the one to ignore the opportunity when it came up. And the issue of realness and improbability has been long on your mind.

The look full of understanding told you that Neil, too, was grateful for the moment you have staged:

“I know what you mean” he nodded, eyeing you closely to assure you would notice the depth of feelings underneath “Usually I don’t think twice about it all, but then sometimes there are those… flashes when I stop and look at you… and I can’t believe my luck” another gasp; it was increasingly hard to breathe “It’s those mornings when you snuggle into my chest instead of getting up, the way your face lights up after that first sip of perfect coffee. The afternoons when I come back from work to find you cuddling Niki on the sofa. Hell, even those evenings when you’ve no strength to talk to me yet you kiss me as if your life depends on it” as his grip tightened, you fought with tears that welled up in your eyes, “That’s when my heart skips a beat, and I need to remind myself that I really am this fortunate” Neil perfected the delivery with a happy grin and raised your hand to leave a kiss on your knuckles.

A tear trailed down your cheek as you exhaled and whispered the only comment available after something of that scale:

“Neil…” it was half complaint, half love confession.

Just that. Just Neil. Using the language of instincts, your hand wandered up to his chest again, settling just over the heart.

A clear message. I love you. Your heart belongs to me.

“What? Tis the night for honesty” despite the cocky tone, his eyes softened as he observed you with silent awe.

Exactly how he just said. Your heart was thumping wildly, kicking up a riot for a cause you did not understand. Or, ever wished to comprehend in entirety. Instead, a simple question had to do:

“Is just… how?” feeling his heartbeat speed up with a steady rhythm, it was easier to find another breath.

And settle back into reality with the knowledge that it was happening. As the opal on the engagement ring caught the moonlight and glimmered, you closed your eyes, willing to extend the bliss as long as possible.

You missed Neil’s gentle smile. And the way his eyes lit up with uncontained happiness.

“You know what they say, do not search, and ye shall find,” he leaned in to whisper with pretend indifference.

As his lips brushed over the shell of your ear, you shuddered. The elementary statement was true to the bone, so much that it was difficult to understand.

But it was how it was always supposed to be. Love that just happened, instead of the one you expected. The unexpected evolution that took your life by a storm and had not yet eased. Perfect.

Your eyes opened, vision clouded with too many emotions to name and not enough words to say. But you had time. All of it.

“Pretty sure none says that,” so you cracked a smile, the exhilaration infectious and precious.

“They should start then” Neil shrugged as he placed a kiss on your temple and pulled you in for a hug.

Just so. Just like that.

Without thinking your arms went around his waist, tightening the embrace and helping you become enveloped within the feel of home. An inhale of the cologne and your heart slowed down to a normal tempo. As always. Neil propped his head on yours, softly swaying to a nonexistent tune. There was nothing to complain about. Nothing to fear. Only one day after the next in the best company you could imagine.

And so, you relaxed in his hold, tangling your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck and gently scratching the skin with soothing motions. It could have been minutes or hours until either of you spoke again. Neil was running his fingertips over your back when he suddenly pressed yet another kiss to the top of your head and murmured:

“Thank you” it was filled with so much conviction that you had to lean back and meet his gaze.

As ever watchful and incredibly blue. Following the logic of the heart, you reached out to cup his cheek and arched an eyebrow:

“For?” the quiet felt too sacred to be broken with as much as voice raised above whisper.

First, in an answer you got a disarming smile, it was one of those that always reminded you that the fall was inevitable. Then, Neil searched your face for a beat before speaking:

“Taking a chance on me” the sincerity felt like a painful pinch straight in the heart.

Inevitable.

Once more feeling too close to tears trust yourself, you hid your face in his neck.

“Always, sunshine” as your throat constricted with the weight of feelings, you left a kiss above his collarbone “You too” a breathless addition.

He did not have to ask, you wanted to say it anyway. A deep breath. A calming inhale of the familiarity. And…

“For showing me what it should feel like”

Hands clinging to his body. Unknown peace filling every cavern of your heart that was not busy loving Neil. Future was not terrifying anymore. It was here. Right here.

Neil shuddered, moved by the cold and the undeniability of truth. His grip tightened, pulling you as close as possible. He did not need to answer. You knew anyway.

Only yours. Always yours. I love you.

A distant sound of a party turning up the speakers. Billy Idol.

A laugh. Happy tears mixing with the heartfelt pain. The foot tapping out a rhythm. Lips mouthing out the lyrics.

“Fancy that for our first dance?” earnest blue and messy blonde.

A giddy grin.

Hopeful.

#tenet #neil tenet #neil tenet x reader #neil x reader #neil tenet fanfic #neil tenet imagine #tenet fanfic #robert pattinson #the art of inversion

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petulant-poet · 3 years

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Uhhh just go off about the tv tma? What’s the plot or does it follow the one on the podcast? Set in another time?

OH BOY OH BOY OKAY SO:

the tma tv channel, also known as channel 15, is basically a channel reserved for avatars and entities of fear to broadcast fear across the world. It's a hard channel to find, but the people who find it come away either wiser or marked.

as for it's canon compliance, it's compliant in a way that no one can really prove it didn't happen. because it pulls in some key characters, but never really strays or takes away from the plot.

now, onto some shows you'll find on the channel!

We of course need to start off with Annabelle Cane’s children’s show itself, Miss Muffet’s Storytime Corner! It’s a puppet show (obviously), and tells a different fairy tale or nursery rhyme each episode, but with a more horrific twist where it starts off cutesy but gets more and more fucked up as the episode goes on and is clearly catering to a specific fear. This way, Annabelle can spread the web’s influence and create more potential avatars and fodder in children.

Jared Hopworth’s often dropping infomercials to advertise his services, ranging from an excellent butcher to bodybuilder to eccentric gardener. You can find the EXACT post that this came from and got this au started here by @yamiiino!

There are of course other advertisements on the channel, such as Breekon and Hope’s shipping goods and the Fairchild Amusement park, “Where you’ll go so high you’ll never want to see the ground again!” Jared just happens to be the most frequent figure in ads.

Jonathan Sims has a small children’s show on the program no less, one that informs children on what the fears are and how to generally avoid them. This is where it gets tricky with canon compliance because I’m imagining that his show kicks off during season 4, when he needs a pick-me-up from Martin and Daisy suggests starting a tv show. They do that, and it’s a small show they film in the archives for fun and are completely caught by surprise when it suddenly ended up on television, polished, with music, and everything (courtesy of the Spiral and the Web). They only got to do 15 episodes before everything went to shit in the Fearpocalypse, unfortunately. This idea was inspired by one of @trensu‘s posts, which you can find here!

Of course, it can’t be a decent channel without at least one News show! On Today in Terror, a Beholding-led station, you’ll find all of the latest news about new avatars, ritual attempts, big events, and occasionally on-the-scene news stories! So on the scene, you might even see yourself sitting on your couch on television! They also have their own version of cringe comps, where they pull up the latest fails in trying to capture victims for the entities and how they were outsmarted so greatly.

Every day around noon though, Channel 15 will broadcast messages and live psalms from the different cults and churches around. From the Cult of the Lightless Flame to the Church of the Divine Host, it’s never a dull moment when the preacher opens their mouth and you listen closely...

Oliver has his own show on the channel as well! His channel, Looking to the Edge, he explains the mortality of everything on earth, even the thing keeping him alive right now. He then gives a list of people who will die within the day, and goes on to ramble about anything and nothing with any callers. Hey, he paid for his half hour, he’ll use it as he likes.

Next up, we have the music hour! Primarily held by Grifter’s bone, the music hour can be chaotic to put it nicely. However, they do get other musicians stemming from other fears on the hour as well, and it brings in a nice mix of terror for everyone to enjoy! (for some idea of other songs I IMPLORE you to listen to @daughter-of-prospero’s Music of the Fears album)

Next up: the Home Hunters show! Starring Helen Distortion, this show takes an unsuspecting couple or family that goes to Helen to move and makes their life a living nightmare, slowly changing their house into nothing but another part of the Distortion. Every episode is a different theme on how she’ll fuck with them, and each episode offers Helen free food as well.

There’s a cooking show on the channel as well! A joint effort of the Corruption and the Flesh, the show takes on the bloody world of cooking, all from scratch! the food almost always comes out bloody and misshapen with an eye here and a rib there, or the food will end up looking ten years older, with mold and mushrooms growing all over it. It never goes well for the unwilling taste tester for the food, to say the least.

Nikola also has a circus show! It always takes place in a different popular theater around the world, and shows dances, strange stuffed animal amalgams, and performers that move in ways that shouldn’t be but entrance you all the same...

At the end of the day, the channel broadcasters always say goodbye to the viewer by name and the screen switches to waves lapping on a shore, fog all around the screen to the point you could swear it was pouring out. Best not to sleep in front of the television on those nights!

and that’s a day on channel 15!

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patchesproblem · 2 years

Text

Patches actually rambles. None of this makes sense I'm so sorry in advanced.

Posting this on here instead of twitter because I talk enough on twitter. My twitter followers get to see my insanity more, but honestly kinda prefer typing everything on Tumblr since I'm not limited to the word limit.

But I'm just thinking of Einslas rn and just want to scream about them so badly. I'm sorry I legitimately don't know why I've just been going feral over these two lately. They have done more for my mental health than the things that are supposed to fix the chemical imbalance.

ALSO Some of this might be ooc but idc. It's almost one in the morning let me have my moment.

Rambling under the cut

This is mostly coming about because I want to write fluff but I can't figure anything out that isn't just them being cute and gay so I'll ramble a little on here and then go write them being cute and gay. Fluff without plot surpremacy <33

Anyways. I'm just thinking about how Einstein still acts like her old self around Tesla. Like it legitimately brings me so much joy knowing that they both haven't been completely destroyed because of their circumstances. I'm just thinking about her randomly going 'today's Tesla is cuter than normal' just to confuse Tesla and catch her off guard at random intervals. She waits literal years just to say that to fuck with her. I just know it. She's committed at this point.

Also Einstein just randomly being affectionate and Tesla can't do anything because as embarrassed as she is she doesn't want to shoo her away. It's literally just "I will KILL YOU!" Einstein just casually leans on her smiling. "Really now?" and Tesla just sits there staring at her.

I think I've mentioned it somewhere before but Tesla legitimately loves affection she just doesn't know how to actually react too it. Like when she comes up to Ein first then normally she's fine, but if Einstein randomly comes up to her and starts being affectionate she just kinda short circuits. Though she also just short circuits if anyone is around to witness it because the great and powerful Nikola Tesla refuses to be seen as 'vulnerable.' She says this as if the entire organization doesn't know how gay those two are but hey whatever helps her sleep at night.

Also I was thinking about it earlier and god.. Tesla probably isn't amused with how cold it normally is in their room but deals with it because she loves Ein and knows how badly she over heats. Being slightly cold is a small price to pay for your wife to not die of a heat stroke. She probably sleeps right up against her anyways so it's not that bad. Also probably has an extra blanket over herself because she's cold but we won't talk about that.

Also just them being soft little idiots and caring for each other is sending me rn. Like Ein see's how stressed and upset Tes is and just goes out of her way to intentionally do things to make her feel better to where she's comfortable enough to talk and it's justajofaofjao

Not even taking into account Tesla trying to comfort Ein and being extra about it all. Like she'll stay up all night just to make sure that she'll be okay, and refuses to sleep until she knows she's asleep. They're losers I say. Losers.

Also they probably have pictures of them as their phone wallpapers. I don't know why I just 100% believe they do. Einstein also has a matching phone charm of Tesla to go with Teslas phone charm (she canonically has this. I'm not joking) of her. They coordinate everything just trust me.

Einstein also probably just lays with Tesla while she waits for her dumbass to wake up. Not all the time, obviously. But she'll just lay there like ".. Well this is my life now." She's stupid. Idiotic, even. Dumbass in love with another even bigger dumbass.

Also just thinking about how they probably do each others make up semi-often. It's more closer to Einstein doing Tesla's make up since she doesn't really wear it to work because she simply doesn't care as much, but Tesla has done hers in the past. She will prop her wife up on a pedastool and make sure she girlbosses her way through life.

Also just them laying down together at night just fjaojfoafjoajfoa

Tesla just laying right up against Ein and just passing out five seconds later and Ein just sitting there glad that this is her life and running her fingers through the others hair as she sleeps. Just stupid idiots. Even when she just randomly threatens her in her sleep she's just like "Aw, look at her. That's the love of my life" meanwhile Teslas mumbling something with murderous intent. Like "I will fucking kill you if i get my hands on you. You're going to experience the fartherest extent of pain known to man kind." (Talking about Otto. Nightmares am I right.)

Like I know I'm just spewing nonsense but lieknfajofjaofjaodfjapfja

Einstein just loves everything Tesla does!! Even if it means she just destroyed an important government building!! She supports lesbians rights AND MOST IMPORTANTLY WRONGS!!!

Tesla just loves literally everything Einstein does even if it drives her up a wall!! Even when she's embarrassing her she doesn't even mind just because it's her. Even when she's intentionally being affectionate in front of others just to mess with her she literally can not be mad over it. SHe knows that she's messing with her and she'd be lying if she said she hated it. Girl fell in love with her because she's an actual menace to society and to everyone around her.

Okay I'm shutting up now it's almost one in the morning.

#patches rambles #einsla #I just love them so much you don't even understand #tbh I think at this point they've accidentally become how I cope LMAO #either that or hyperfixation is just Extremely Strong at this point #though they're also just adorable and stupid so that might be it too #idfk #I'd say I'm sorry but if you're following me you know how mentally ill on main I can get.#it's on you at this point #nikolas posts

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mascwhump · 2 years

Text

Ok, so this piece is a parallel to this one. I wanted to write Crow and Mallory’s POV. Pretty dialogue heavy.

CW: just a whole lotta angst, guns

As the elevator doors opened to the roof, it was quickly apparent that Charlie wasn't there. Crow had the intrusive thought to look over the edge, but decided against it. He got back into the elevator. Mallory lingered for a moment, almost causing him to miss it. He slid between the doors just before they shut.

"So, what now?" Mallory asked.

"He's probably gone for a walk, which I hate more than the roof. He could've gone anywhere, so best bet's just to sit tight. He won't be gone long. He doesn't ever disappear for long," Crow rambled.

They stepped out the elevator on Charlie's floor and went back to his apartment. An hour passed, and he still hadn't returned.

"Should we be getting worried now?" Mallory asked.

"Can you shut the fuck up?" Crow snapped.

"Hey, I haven't said anything for the past hour. Don't be a cunt," Mallory shot back.

"This is your fault. Everything was fine until you showed up."

"Well, I'm sorry for existing."

"You should be."

Their quarrel was cut off by both of their phones going off simultaneously. They had been sent an odd link with the message "watch or we kill him". Crow was hesitant to click it, but Mallory opened it immediately. It took him to a sketchy site with a ridiculously amount of ads. In the center, a video loaded. Once it finished, it made itself full screen. Crow could tell by the look on his face that it wasn't good. He finally clicked the link on his own phone to see for himself.

"Oh, oh god," Crow muttered.

He felt like all of the air had gotten forced out of him as his heart rate skyrocketed. Mallory was on the phone now, but he couldn't hear him. His ears rang and his hands shook.

"Hey! Did you hear me? I said Nikolas is on it. He's tracing their location now," Mallory said.

Crow looked up at him slowly. He then sprung up and grabbed Mallory by the throat before slamming him into the wall.

"I should fucking kill you right now," he growled, "You are solely responsible for this. You deserve to be in that position, not him."

Mallory tried to pry his fingers from his neck. He was certain Crow was going to kill him this time, right then and there- until his phone went off again. Crow let go to retrieve it from where it was dropped on the floor.

"He got an address. Fuck, I didn't drive," he said.

"I did. Let's go," Mallory coughed as he caught his breath.

"Give me your keys," Crow demanded.

"No. I'm coming, whether you want me to or not."

Crow sighed as he threw the phone at him. They left the apartment and got into the Mercedes. Mallory plugged in the address on the GPS, then handed his phone to Crow.

"We have to keep the video up. I think they know if we're watching," he said.

"God dammit," Crow muttered.

He kept the livestream open on both of their phones, but muted the volume and kept the screens facing down.

"It says an hour until we get there. We'll make it there sooner. I'll run over someone if I have to," Mallory said.

"I'm sure you will," Crow replied.

He reluctantly checked the phones a few minutes later.

"Fuck!" He exclaimed.

"What? What's happening?" Mallory asked.

"I'm sure you'd like to know."

"Oh, fuck off! Is he okay?"

"No, he's not o-fucking-kay! They're... he's..."

"Shit."

The engine roared as Mallory sped up. He was going almost double the speed limit now that they were outside of the city. Crow was starting to bite at his nails. Mallory could see him nervously bouncing his leg in the corner of his vision, and it was distracting him. He put his hand on Crow's knee to get him to stop. Crow instantly smacked his hand away.

"Don't fucking touch me," he snapped.

"Quit it, then. You're making me nervous," Mallory replied.

"I'm anxious right now, alright?"

"So am I. We need to think of a plan for when we get there. My gun's in the glovebox."

Crow immediately retrieved the gun and started inspecting it. Mallory flinched when he haphazardly let the barrel point in his direction.

"Jesus! Watch it," he hissed.

"Is it even loaded?" Crow asked as he took out the magazine.

"Of course it's loaded. Why would I keep an empty gun in there?"

"I don't know, but you seem to have a track record of not knowing if a gun is loaded or not."

"What- Oh. God, give me a break. That was one time."

Crow put the gun back in the glovebox for safekeeping until they got there. He refused to check the livestream again. He knew that, no matter what was happening, he wouldn't be able to do anything about it in the moment. Charlie wouldn't want him to see it, anyway.

"Okay, we're close. Hand me the gun," Mallory said.

"Uh, no. I can guarantee you that I'm the better shot," Crow replied.

As they pulled up to the house, Crow had his seatbelt off and the door open before they'd even fully stopped.

"Are we sure this is it?" He asked.

"Pretty sure," Mallory said.

They started around back, careful to watch their footing on the gravel. Crow picked up a large rock and handed it to Mallory.

"Break the window, then we'll bust in and shoot the bastards," Crow said, "and throw it fucking hard. If you don't break it on the first try, I'll break your neck."

Mallory took a step back and threw the rock as hard as he could. It smashed through the glass, and Crow reached in to open the door.

#whump #whump oc #whump rescue #angst #oc #easton’s unnamed story #kinda #recorded whump

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arolesbianism · 4 months

Note

Just wanted to drop in and say thank you for finding and posting the ONI logs that you do! As someone who loves the story of the game but absolutely would not have the energy to find all of the logs that aren’t on the wiki legitimately its nice to be able to see some of them. The one w/ nails in it is especially interesting! Nails was already one of my favorite dupes but that log made me like them even more tbh. Everyone say thank you to Human Nails™️ for making dupes like actually cognizant.

Also, saw your ONI stuff on artfight! I am absolutely not plotting and scheming anything at all i swear :]

Oghhhh tysm :')!!!! I've been feeling a bit self conscious abt my oni obsession lately so this means a lot! I still need to get around to making my oni story catalogue actually readable, I started a while back but ran out of steam after the like 50th incident with said one with Nails in it lol. And I actually recognized you from artfight! Saw your oni guys a few days ago and I'm honestly obsessed with them, it would be a shame if I had my hand forced and had to draw them :3c

#rat rambles #oni posting #I hope Ill have the energy to draw multiple of them tbh Im bad at chosing what characters to draw #but yeah it is rough to be an oni lore enjoyer in this world where all out of game sources are horribly outdated #and even the stuff thats not outdated on the wiki is often just. straight up wrong.#I believe I went and fixed some of the worst stuff at one point but I mostly only fixed the easier stuff to fix if Im remembering correctly #as in incorrect names and job descriptions and stuff #I should go check if the jackie thrratening to burn nikola's work thing is still there because as far as I know thats just not true #I think that was probably a misremembering of a seed is planted where nails talks abt jackie burning some of their work #because outside of that I dont think jackie burning stuff was ever explicitly brought up?#or maybe I just dont remember it or smth it has been a lil bit since I've reread everything #Ive been rereading some stuff every now and then but I havent sat down and binged it all again yet #well hey Ill have plenty of time to comb over everything once I get back to cleaning up my log doc eventually #and then maybe after that Ill. sigh. go update the wiki. sighhhhhhhh #I rly dont want to but at the same timr Someone needs to for ppl like you aka most of them who arent going to manually hunt it all down #cause trust me it feels like loosing your mind to try to find all the logs in game even while actively cheating #you know its bad when I had an easier time learning how to read the code and finding the logs there then actually finding them all in game #plus as far as I know a decent amount of them are dlc exclusive which makes it even more hard to get into #well maybe not harder but more money yknow #but yeah Im glad I had the experience of hunting lore stuff down manually but I would not wish it upon others lol

0 notes

agnesmontague · 3 years

Text

I posted 6,054 times in 2021

567 posts created (9%)

5487 posts reblogged (91%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 9.7 posts.

I added 3,509 tags in 2021

#tma - 1603 posts

#rambles - 580 posts

#sailor moon - 240 posts

#food - 226 posts

#art - 192 posts

#vibes - 161 posts

#fashion - 159 posts

#animals - 134 posts

#deltarune - 109 posts

#fave - 105 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#me about to pursue an art history doctorate after i finish what i'm doing now and write a book of nonsense about how it all relates together

My Top Posts in 2021

there’s something therapeutic about imagining a broadway-style curtain call at the end of magnus. tim and sasha appear from each side of the stage to wave at the audience, sasha holding not!sasha’s hand. elias and peter bow deeply in unison. michael and helen poke each other playfully with their long fingers and pop in and out of different doors before disappearing. gerry comes onstage in a flurry of papers and brings eric and mary with him. annabelle is lowered onto the stage from a hanging platform like a diva to thunderous applause. simon and mike crew hoot and wave at the audience from a high platform and pop away simultaneously when the spotlight turns off. nikola and jane swing each other in a wild dance that makes the stage shake. gertrude appears alone and does an elegant curtsey. daisy+basira and melanie+georgie appear together, arms linked, and all four do a bow together. finally, after everything has quieted down, jon and martin appear from either side, and as the curtain falls, they join hands.

3440 notes • Posted 2021-03-26 04:55:59 GMT

i consider myself an expert in the field

3621 notes • Posted 2021-05-03 15:01:55 GMT

anyone else bothered by the slow disappearance of websites for kids and the integration of children into sites meant for adults. as a kid i spent most of my time online on websites like girlsgogames, club penguin, barbie.com, moshi monsters, etc. etc. now 7 year olds just use tiktok.

[op was a terf so i copied the post]

6710 notes • Posted 2021-12-06 17:58:06 GMT

trans rights and lives will always be legitimate and worth fighting for so terfs die mad

[original post: you know what i think really slaps? the fact that every generation of teens online have grown up with personality quizzes. when i was a teen we had quizilla. before the rise of buzzfeed they were ubiquitous in magazines and a bunch of sites had flash personality quizzes that played like games. now we have uquiz. entire chunks of the internet might be getting phased out someday but on god we have our right to find out which fruit best represents our personality]

20565 notes • Posted 2021-11-01 00:26:03 GMT

so i just learned that after disney+ debuted disney shut down a huge chunk of its tv channels around the world such as disney channel and disney XD including the ones in south korea, so for old times’ sake i just spent a good hour or so watching channel shutdown compilations and 90% of these worldwide disney channels just.... got absolutely no sendoff whatsoever. many of them got their plug pulled right in the middle of a show without even waiting for the episode to finish airing and there was no ending jingle or even a voiced-over announcement, only a sudden cut to a soulless monotone blank screen with “this channel is no longer available.” like the stuff of childhood nightmares

you’d think a company with such a family-friendly image would take the time to at least explain briefly to its very young audience that all their fave shows will be moving to another service or something, hell, at least do it for advertisements’ sake so that kids can pester their parents into buying disney+, but disney does not care about you and it does not care about your children and it will absolutely snatch the last shred of comfort from a kid’s hands if it means they don’t have to spend an extra $400 recording an ending announcement in different languages

and honestly i am just sitting here with my heart in my throat like. none of our current art is truly permanent, is it. we like to think that we have better documentation and archiving technology than generations past but all it really takes is for one megacompany to slap some copyright tape over its comic book villain safe and then toss that safe in the ocean for all it’s worth. youtube could potentially choose to do the same and simply wipe its entire site clean overnight. adobe decided to throw flash in the garbage and decades worth of internet content just.... disappeared from reach. i am begging every digital creator out there to backup your content to as many outlets as you possibly can. use different cloud services that aren’t owned by one company. use physical usb drives and hard drives. if programs you used to open your work become obsolete at least document what it was so it can be passed on and remembered by people who want to. jesus christ i need a drink

35948 notes • Posted 2021-10-24 17:46:34 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #INCREDIBLE. A POST I MADE YESTERDAY ALREADY AT NO. 3

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jonspurpleskirt · 4 years

Text

An Unlikely Befriending

Summary: Jon gets kidnapped. Jon gets bored. And Jon makes very unlikely friends because of it. Aka: Pen and Paper saves the day (world) and Jon finally gets to have a band. A/N: This is pure fluff, no warnings apply I think. ___

The worst thing about being kidnapped by a crazy mannequin murder clown monstrousity and sitting in a cold, room with creepy wax works, tied to a chair was not the ever present terror. True the fear of Nikola finally deeming his skin good enough and skinning him alive was quite potent, but it wasn't as bad as boredom.

Jon had never taken well to waiting. His mind needed to be occupied 24/7, needed something to latch onto, to obsess about. It's why he became a researcher in the first place. Having most of his freedom taken from him made occupying himself very hard.

At least they still let him eat and drink here and there. Nikola always visited personally, her overly cheery voice bubbling forth as she chattered away while slathering him with lotion or shoving bits of take out food in his mouth. His diet those last two weeks had been very varied and healthy and he had never drank so much water before.

He still probably looked a mess, what with no access to a shower and barely being able to sleep at all. And the constant terror. Oh yeah and the boredom.

Oh the boredom.

Jon was currently sitting in his chair as he was wont to do. Thankfully not nailed down despite all the nagging from Sarah Baldwin. The coffin was singing or moaning with a slight melody behind it, depending on who you asked. And somehow Jon found himself humming along, trying to find a good melody to go with the haunting tune. It wasn't like he had anything better to do and if he didn't start doing something creative his mind would start eating itself soon.

So he hummed, experimenting with the notes, twisting them into something that was reminiscent of circus music and airships. And then he kept humming the melody over and over, forming words in his mind to go with the tune. Once the spark was lit a fire started to burn, the story branching out and out into a twirling mass of chaos and fire.

He had gotten lost in his imagination, hadn't noticed how loud he had become, hadn't heard Nikola approach. Jon screeched when she leant down over him and grinned at him upside down, nose nearly touching his.

Nikola had the gall to laugh at him, no breath fanning over his face as she did so.

"Awww Archivist! I didn't know you had such a nice voice!"

"Hrmph."

"Yes your singing was also quite good!" She straightened herself, back cracking in several places. Striding around his chair she towered over him, tattered, bloody ringmaster uniform filling his field of vision.

"I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to sing, of course! And the broken repeat is lovely."

"Hm."

"Anyway water time!"

With gleeful cackling she ripped the tape from his mouth, amused enough to not immediately shove the bottle between his teeth.

"There are words to it, too." Jon rushed to say, not exactly sure why. What was he offering her here? A solo performance?

"Oh?" she at least didn't tape his mouth shut again. For now.

After waiting several beats where both stared at each other and nothing else happened Jon dared to speak up again.

"I ah... well I wrote it myself? Not wrote, of course. My hands are tied at the moment-" He was rambling. Nikola had given him the freedom of speech and he was off like a shot, telling her everything about what he had been thinking about before she had interrupted his impromptu jamming session, terror completely terminating his brain to mouth filter.

Nikola, for her part, took it all in stride. She even settled on the floor in front of him, blinking every now and then to indicate that she was still present.

"It's such a shame." she finally spoke, holding the water bottle to his mouth, letting him drink of his own volution for once. "You would have made a perfect piece for the choir. Hm maybe what will be left of you will do."

"I could sing for you now." Jon offered as soon as his mouth was free again.

Nikola startled at the offer and Jon just shrugged as much as he was able to. He'd rather sing to a creepy murder doll than spend one minute longer alone and bored out of his mind. And if he could delay the Unknowing (and the violent removal of his skin) by keeping Nikola entertained than even better.

That sounded like he almost had a plan. Which was untrue. He only had a very strong desire for entertainment.

"No sneaky questions." Nikola warned.

"Promise. I can't guarantee good quality rhymes, though. I'm still workshopping."

Singing out loud what had been in his head was always an awkward affair. He had wanted to start a band with Georgie in uni. But it was exactly because of this that he had never bothered.

"That was fun!" Nikola screamed after he was finished nontheless. Clapping her hands in delight, which created a horrible cracking noise.

"I'm glad? I also DM."

She tilted her head at him. "What's that?"

Jon explained the concept of pen and paper games to her while she rubbed lotion into his skin and had her hooked immediately.

Later that day (or maybe the next day, really Jon had no concept of time anymore) Jon was for the first time allowed out of his chair, carefully rubbing circulation back into his hands. Nikola had only briefly left him alone after watering and lotioning him. They had hashed out what kind of world and system they wanted to use (a horror setting, of course) and then Nikola was off and dragging Breekon and Hope back into the room so they had enough people to play.

Either Breekon or Hope sat down behind Jon, large hands lightly clasping his arms, squeezing every once in a while to remind him that should he try and escape he would only end up in pain.

Jon shifted awkwardly in the grip, unused to gentleness even if it was supposed to be threatening.

"Alright. First, character creation. Who do you guys want to play?"

It became a daily thing. The three beings in his group quickly became addicted to his story telling and to the characters they were allowed to play. Nikola tore through characters, trying on different personalities like pieces of clothing. She had a beautiful eery singing voice, Jon was surprised to find out when she had decided to play a member of a steampunk band.

Breekon and Hope were less manic, too attached to their twins to play anyone else. They changed voices and accents every session, though. Jon deigned to ignore their shenanigans, scared to make them angry. He hadn't had this much fun in ages, he didn't want to loose that.

The two delivery men took turns holding him down while they played, Hope holding onto his arms and Breekon using him like a child would a Teddy bear.

Eventually the three lingered after their sessions had ended, the ropes that tied him to his chair less tight. Jon tried to keep the conversations casual, to not ask all the questions that burned at the tip of his tongue. He found that he didn't need to. Tongue loose from goofing around Nikola was often chatty, Breekon and Hope throwing in their two cents every once in a while.

Eventually the topic about Tims younger brother came up.

"Danny Stoker? Grimauldi skinned him? Hm..." Nikolas head nearly dislodged as she stared at the ceiling in thought. "Noooo." She giggled. "We didn't skin anyone that night, silly! We were scoping out locations for the dance! Danny's little group stumbled into us and got a little confused~"

"But Tim saw Grimauldi rip Dannys skin off of a puppet."

Nikola shrugged. "An illusion. We're good at making you people see things that aren't really there. Yet."

"So Danny is alive?"

"I believe so!~ If he didn't die in a ditch somewhere."

Jon was very careful to keep his voice as soft as possible with the next question. "Could you find him again and bring him to the Institute? To Tim and... I don't know... maybe that's a stupid idea given that he can't be sure it's really him..."

"If I track him down do I get inspiration for my character next session?"

"That's cheating." Breekon complained under his breath behind Jon.

"I... yes?"

Nikola grinned. "Wonderful! I see what I can do!"

Days went by like that, Nikola or Breekon or Hope updating him on Dannys search, which had turned out to be harder than they had thought. Well at least Jon was keeping them busy.

They were in the middle of racing a burning train into the central bank of London when a door creaked behind Jon, bathing the room in technicolour and spiral shapes.

"That is not what I thought I'd find here." A voice that wavered between confused and gleeful mused.

Jon twisted in the grip Breekon had on him. "Hello Michael."

"Hello Archivist. You've found yourself in an interesting situation." The grin Michael shot him was a knife glinting in the light before striking.

"Yes. Why are you here?"

Nikola had let him practice after Jon had explained his lack of training, much more lax with her hostage now that he fed her fascinating stories of blood and gore. So there was no trace of compulsion in his voice when he asked the question.

Michael answered truthfully anyway. "I came to kill you of course!"

"I have dips on that!" Nikola said, voice pleasant and grin feral.

"I'm sorry about that. Would you like to join the game instead?"

Michael stared at him as though he had grown mad. Impressed, curious and lightly terrified. Then it laughed that horrible, headache inducing laugh.

"There's a lot of lies and delusion." Jon coaxed, heart beating out of his chest with nerves.

"He's a good storyteller." Hope added, Nikola and Breekon nodding along.

"Hm alright. I guess I can play for a bit."

It didn't stay just for a bit. Michael stayed through the finale of the story and then demanded to start another, their little ragtag group of definitely not heroes causing more chaos than any other player group Jon had ever DMed before. And that was saying something. Hours upon hours passed, Michael disappearing and reappearing to get Jon coffee and tea to keep his voice from giving out.

In the middle of it all Michael began twitching and twisting, glitching in and out of sight before slumping to the ground with a groan, form for once near comprehensible. Another door opened and out walked Helen looking down at the Distortion in disappointment.

"Oh that didn't destroy you. Shame."

"Helen?"

"Hello Jon! I was coming to rescue you given that Michael got a little distracted. Do you want to come to the archives with me?"

Honestly Jon should have been shocked, probably angry. He was definitely sad. And yet the most he felt was just an overwhelming sense of whelp.

Jon vaguely gestured towards Nikola, as much as Breekons hold allowed him to. "Ask her."

"We're not done yet."

"Later then?"

Nikola considered Jon for a long moment, both staring unblinking at each other. "Give us an hour."

To Jons great surprise Helen just nodded and delicately sat on the chair Jon usually frequented in his "freetime" all prim and proper except for the long sharp fingers curling at the edges like corkscrews.

"Now where were we?"

Michael groaned from the floor for once not smiling. Jon felt a twinge of sympathy for him.

"Are you alright?"

"Been better. Been worse. Let's burn this village down!"

There was no end to the tale they had been playing, not with just one session of playtime. Jon felt a bit bad about that, especially because he had left it at a cliffhanger. No one seemed to be angry at him for it, though. Michael had recovered fast and was again his usual ominous cheery, albeit lightly aggressive self. He poked and prodded at Helen like a curious cat while Nikola massaged lotion into Jons skin for the last time and handed him several expensive looking bottles, rattling down a step by step skin care routine he was to follow to the t or else she would break into his house and do it herself.

Hope patted him on the head. "See you around, Archivist."

"You're really letting me go? Just like that?" Jon still couldn't believe it.

Nikola shrugged. "I found another option. And I'd like to keep doing this after the Unknowing."

"Will that be even possible?"

The grin he got from was not at all reassuring. "I don't know~"

Well that was probably the best he would get from her. Jon gave a hesitant tiny wave and, flanked by both Michael and Helen stepped through their door.

Back at the archive no one had even questioned his disappearance. A fact that made Michael and Helen laugh, even though they both refused to leave as Tim, Melanie and Basira questioned him about his whereabouts.

Martin was the only one who took Jons forced vacation in stride. Maybe he even was a little too happy about a group of mannequins harassing him to take better care of himself.

"You're not compromised now, are you?" Basira asked when Jon had settled back into his office after a long shower.

"No? Because I still don't want the world to end?"

"Good."

Somehow Jon knew that she would still keep an eye on him from now on.

~~~

When the day came to blow up the ritual site Jon hadn't slept a wink in three nights and was overcome by guilt. Despite how aweful his initial time at the circus had been and despite him knowing what horrible things Nikola and her kin did in their freetime, Jon still felt bad about probably killing her.

He tried to rationalize his feelings away, connecting his rising anxiety with the fact that Danny still hadn't been found. It was a flimsy denial.

Tim stayed by his side the whole time, resolute in his burning desire for vengeance. Jon was scared that he would loose him to this, too. Had confessed as much to Michael and Helen, who had taken to keeping at least one door manifested somewhere in the tunnels at all times. The two had started to get along well after some initial disagreement. The Spiral, split as it was between the two of them, was weaker in its influence now, leaving more of Michael Shelley and Helen Richardson to make decisions.

They weren't here now. Daisy, Basira and Tim were, setting up explosives and arguing about rescuing people that were already long dead.

And then Nikola appeared and the dance started and nothing made sense anymore.

Jon woke up six months later, Georgie calling him a monster and Basira giving him a statement to "eat" catching him up on everything he had missed. Tim had miraculously survived, having been dragged through a door by either Helen or Michael. Daisy and Basira had encountered Breekon and Hope, who had argued about what they should do with "Jons feral friends" and in the end had led them savely out of the building before it could go boom, muttering about possible inspiration points.

The only one who hadn't been saved was Jon. He tried not to feel too hurt about that.

Coming back to work was as anti climatic as it had been after the kidnapping. The only one who seemed happy to see him was Martin. He had apologized profusely for the hug and promptly stopped doing so when Jon dashed forward and back into Martins warm embrace, finally breaking down.

He had been too caught up in his crying to make a note of the little kiss Martin pressed into his hair.

They all were a little lost after averting the apocalypse, normal everyday life eluding them. Elias might have been out of the picture for the moment, but Peter Lukas had taken over and fighting against the isolation was taking its toll on everyone.

They were all huddled in the breakroom, faces grim and stewing in silence so as to not break into an arguement when they got their delivery.

Breekon and Hope stepped into the small space with their usual nonchalance dragging a scared young man between them, who had a lot of resemblance to Tim.

"Delivery for Jonathan Sims. Nikola says hi."

Tim was the first one up. "No... No no nononononono that can't be. He's dead. Jon. Jon tell me is that really him?!"

Jon looked at the scared man, who had his gaze locked on Tim, recognition slowly dawning on his face. He Looked and he Knew.

"Yes. No one was killed the night Danny disappeared. His group encountered Nikola and her troupe during a rehearsal, got confused and then lost. And was lost ever since. Nikola told me of this. She promised to find him for me, for you."

That was all Tim needed to rush forward, catching his brother in his arms and hugging him close. "Danny!"

Danny clung back just as tightly, awareness barely back. Still obviously shaken and confused.

Jon smiled at the two delivery men. "Thank you. Will he... will he be alright."

Hope shrugged. "Dunno. Nikola said to make him remember bit by bit. Been not Danny for a long time. Might need to get used to it again."

"We'll take it slow." Tim promised, silent tears streaming down his face.

"Good luck. Hey Archivist, do we get inspiration, too?"

Jon laughed, incredulous. The others in the room watched the exchange with varying degress of exasperation and outrage.

"You know what? Yes. Yes you have. And I'll give you all advantage on your rolls next session. Only that one session, though! Same for Nikola. How is she, by the way?"

Breekon made a so-so sign. "Restless. We've waited over six months to find out what happens after that cliffhanger you gave us."

"Right." He still couldn't believe it. "Tonight 8 o'clock, my flat?"

Twin grins, the most excited he had ever seen them. "See you then, Archivist."

Tim was still gently hushing his brother, rocking back and forth on his feet to try and calm him down a little. And he still had tears streaming down his face, looking like an absolute wreck. But he still managed to join the unimpressed stares that were thrown his way by everyone but Martin, who at this point had just started to roll with the punches.

"You really befriended the clown club and made them rescue literally all of us?" Basira asked in a deadpan voice.

"I kind of feel cheap now." Daisy muttered. "As though those clowns let us win."

"Look, what can I say? Pen and Paper games are fun. I can't blame them. And Nikola did want to start a band."

"Oh my god." Melanie groaned, her head thunking onto the table. "I can't believe it."

"A band?" Basira asked, suddenly much more alert. They really had gotten quite desensitized to the whole monster thing, hadn't they? "What, you can sing?"

"As a matter of fact, yes. But really. Shouldn't we... I mean shouldn't we focus on Danny? There's a cot-"

"I know." Tim interrupted. "We all know there's a cot. I'll take him home, you keep talking about your weird band plans. Monster boss? We talk later, but... thank you."

Silence reigned long enough to follow Tim out of the Institute before Martin piped up, cheeks reddening before he had even opened his mouth. "Could we... Could we have a taste?"

"A taste? Of what? My voice?"

"Hold up, if Sims is going to sing I'll have to record it." Melanie tapped on her phone and held it into the room as one would do a microphone. "Alright go."

Jon sighed, what he didn't do to keep up the group morale.

"Aww shit." Was Basiras conclusion when he was done. "What kind of music were you thinking of playing?"

"Steampunk."

"Count me in."

~~~

Today had been weird, Jon thought, mind reeling from the whiplash of... kindness? That had happened after the delivery of one Danny Stoker. Granted the last month, no

year

had been weird. But this had topped it all. At least it had been a nice weird.

Jon had nearly forgotten about his appointment with a certain group of Strangers when he got back to his flat, overworked, hungry and still processing. So he should be forgiven for the scream he let out when he saw three large figures huddling on his too small couch.

"You haven't been taking care of your skin at all!"

There was no time to duck away from the cold, hard hands that fluttered all over his body. Nikola squished his cheeks like a proper grandmother, clearly unhappy about their elasticity.

"I was in a coma for six months."

"And awake for a few weeks now." A cheerful male voice said from behind him, bringing the smell of pizza with it.

"We were there he didn't take care of himself at all!" Helen added, putting down several cans of soda and what looked to be instant coffee.

"You're horrible!" Nikola wailed, manhandling him until he was squished between Breekon and Hope. "All my beautiful work! Ruined!"

"Uh... sorry?"

"You can make it up to us with weekly sessions." Michael suggested with a grin.

"Both on Saturday and Sunday!" Helen added.

"I actually planned for Sunday to be band day." Jon lied. "Basira wants to join, by the way."

They were all settled around the small coffee table now, food and drink on the floor so they had enough place to roll their dice.

"Wonderful! What did you think we'd name it?"

Jon tilted his head given the illusion of thinking it over even though he had known what to name his band since highschool.

"The Mechanisms."

#tma #jonathan sims #nikola orsinov #breekon and hope #michael the distortion #helen the distortion #kidnapping #fun times #humor #fluff #fanfiction #my writing #everyone lives cause i said so #even danny #enemies to friends

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giraffe-lesbian · 4 years

Text

Do You Want To Go? - Darksparks Fic

Summary:

“Okay, then I won’t go either,” Renee announced with a sigh of relief. She leaned back into her chair like a momentous weight had just been taken off her shoulders. The skirmisher then glanced over to the blonde and mumbled, “Not because you’re not going, I’m just staying because I don’t want to go.”

What Wraith and Wattson were actually doing instead of going to see Fuse introduce himself in Kings Canyon

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29233782

“Do you want to go?” Renee asked as they sat beside each other. Her gaze had shifted over to Natalie, curiosity sparking in her eyes. She was munching on a bowl of cereal, but it looked like she was now just playing with it. The skirmisher rarely ate breakfast with the other legends, but if she was, she was always by Natalie’s side.

“Mmm...” Natalie responded, resting her spoon inside of the bowl. She tapped the side of her chin as she thought, trying her best to think through all of the options.

Of course, the excitement that came with a new person joining the Apex Games was always fun. Everyone became so involved and so excited, trying to piece together exactly who it would be. They were just as clueless as the public sometimes. Besides that, it was nice to see a new face and see what they would bring to the table. Of course, sometimes they turned out to be kind of sucky like a murderous robot, but sometimes they turned out to be nice like the sweet, motherly scientist who had joined recently.

However, the opening ceremonies, in Natalie’s opinion, were a bit different. There were crowds, maybe too many adoring fans, and lots and lots of noise. It was fun, she supposed, for a little bit, but they often got too overwhelming.

And if anything, it looked like this new guy was going to make a grand entrance.

“We don’t have to,” Renee started, picking up a spoonful of cereal before letting it fall back into the bowl. “Or, well, um. You don’t have to go, but if you don’t go, I probably won’t go,” she added rather cautiously. “Well, no, fuck, I mean... You don’t have to go for my sake, I honestly don’t care if I go-“

“Mmm... Well, I don’t know,” Natalie said, stopping her girlfriend before she became a rambling mess. Her girlfriend. The thought made her smile. They hadn’t been dating for very long; it was still such a new thing, but it had been wonderful so far. Sneaking to each other’s rooms, watching movies, holding hands underneath the table, sometimes cuddling... Absolute perfection if you asked the blonde. It was, however, still a secret to every other legend and, well, the entire universe. Natalie didn’t really mind though; the privacy was nice, and nobody could stand the media after all.

Renee looked up at her almost expectantly, now falling quiet. Was there a little bit of hope in her eyes?

“I feel like we should go, but...” Natalie spoke up again before taking another bite of her cereal. She chewed it, once again weighing her options. To go or not to go... To tell you the truth, she did and she didn’t. Eventually, she shook her head and continued, “I still need to do some work on my pylons, check up on the ring’s status, make sure it’s still working properly for next season... Dieu, c'est tellement de travail...”

“... English, Nat?”

Natalie blinked at her before softly smiling. “We’ve still got to teach you some French, but... I suppose I will not go. I have some things I need to do,” she finally answered. “Besides, it’s too noisy.”

Oh, the look of relief on Renee’s face was priceless. It made Natalie’s smile just grow. Sometimes, if you paid just enough attention, you could read the skirmisher like a book. That was Natalie’s little secret though.

Natalie giggled, looking at her girlfriend with amusement in her eyes. “Oh, chérie, you are so silly sometimes,” she said, reaching underneath the table and holding the other woman’s hand. “If you didn’t want to go, you could of just told me. I would rather stay with you than go.”

“Well, I didn’t want you to feel like you had to stay behind for me if you did wanna go,” Renee reasoned. Her face was turning a light pink now at the sudden contact, but she didn’t pull away.

“No, I wouldn’t feel like that at all,” Natalie replied, shaking her head. “I’m sure... Fuse, was it? Monsieur Fuse is nice and all, but I would rather spend the time with you.”

“Can I come stay with you then instead?” Renee then asked quietly. Her eyes then widened and she, once again, began to ramble. “Not... not if you’re busy, I was just thinking I could sit in the same room as you worked or just play with Nikola. I won’t bother you; you’re just nice company to have.” As she said that, her face only grew brighter. Instinctively, the woman tugged on her scarf, trying to hide her face. It always reminded Natalie of a turtle trying to hide away in its shell.

It seemed Renee was wonderful at beating around the bush.

Once more, another smile graced Natalie’s face. “Of course you can,” she replied, trying to put her girlfriend’s worry away. Ah, there was that word again! “Just know I have to do some work, but you’re free to come over,” she continued. “We can’t just cuddle the entire time, just so you know,” Natalie said, giving the skirmisher a wink and playfully wagging a finger at her.

Renee nodded, and there it was. One of her rare smiles was on her face. “You’ve got it,” she replied in an official way, trying her best to play along. “No cuddling. No girlfriend stuff. I will remain quiet and out of your way. In fact, you won’t even know I’m there.”

This caused both of the women to quietly laugh.

However, was it likely they’d uphold this promise?

Well... they thought it was.

***

Natalie tried not to make a big deal about hanging out with her girlfriend this time around, but she did prepare some breakfast for her. Which, for your information, did not take up that much time and didn’t mean all that much. She was still thinking about doing her work and simply just enjoying Renee’s far away company, sort of like how Nikola hung out with her everyday. Silent but always there, just quiet company. The blonde did wake up just a little earlier to have a nice stack of fluffy pancakes waiting on the skirmisher when she opened the door to the blonde’s room, but it wasn’t that big of a deal. No, she was still thinking about work and not about her girlfriend.

And yes, she did sit down with Renee as she ate them just to make sure she ate them. And yes, she maybe did talk to her after that, but only for a little bit!

But now, especially now, she was going to work.

The blonde settled at her desk, definitely ready to work. She was going to work. Work on her pylons, yes. Get to work on those pylons. The pylons... The pylons that needed to be worked on. She needed to work on them, yes, and she was going to work.

But...

She looked over a few wires of some pylons for a few moments before scrunching her nose, shaking her head, and swiveling around in her desk chair. Renee was laying on the couch, Nikola laying on her chest and a book in her hands. Natalie stared over at her for a moment before sighing, jumping up from her chair, and going to stand in front of the couch.

Renee looked up from her book, giving her a questionable look.

“Bouge, Nikola, bouge,” she shooed the cat off the other woman’s chest. Once he didn’t budge, she simply picked the cat off of Renee’s chest and placed him on the floor.

“Nat? What are you doing?” Renee interjected, looking even more confused. She had closed her book now, holding it to the side. “I thought...? Aren’t you going to work?”

Natalie shrugged at her and then clambered on top of her girlfriend, now practically laying on top of her. She snuggled into the older woman’s chest before letting out a satisfied sigh.

Renee was still... rather confused. However, as she opened her mouth, Natalie quickly shushed her and snuggled closer. So they settled down like this for a while, Natalie curled up on her chest and Renee holding her book in one hand and the other running through Natalie’s short hair.

“Turn on the TV?” she finally piped up after a few minutes passed, looking up at Renee. “Find a movie or something, or we can watch the opening ceremony for Fuse?” she suggested. Curiosity had gotten the better of her now, but she’d still rather be here in her room, snuggled up with her girlfriend, than actually there. That was for sure.

“Alright,” the skirmisher replied rather simply, reaching over to the remote that sat on the coffee table. After turning the television on and flipping through the channels until it got to the Apex Channel, Renee sat it back down along with her book. She let her now free arm fall over Natalie’s back while the other continued to play with her hair.

The video panned over all of King’s Canyon at first before finally stopping on the rather large crowd that had gathered to meet Fuse’s arrival. It showed a few of the legends that had gathered to see this new legend’s grand entrance, and it even caught a few of them to give short interviews. What did they know about the new legend? How did they feel about him? How will he change the game? It showed Ajay first, then Makoa following not too soon after, and then...

Renee chuckled when she saw Elliot on the screen, shaking her head. “Hopefully he doesn’t make a fool of himself,” she said, causing Natalie to quietly giggle against her chest. The skirmisher had an expectant look on her face as she looked at the screen.

“Surely he won’t,” Natalie replied, playfully tapping Renee’s side. “Maybe a little stuttering, but I’m sure he’ll be fine. Besides, I think the crowd eats it up anyway. Part of his charm, non?”

Renee frowned at that and huffed, “What charm? As far as I know, he doesn’t have any.”

The legend on the screen stumbled through his words for a few moments, but made it through the interview without much more difficultly. He commented a little on his initial thoughts of Fuse and how he looked forward to working alongside him, a rather plain answer really, and mentioned that he was a little shocked by how big the ship he was coming in on.

The video then switched to show the massive ship that had come to King’s Canyon today. It looked like almost everything was ready to go, and it seemed like Fuse was finally about to introduce himself.

“Jesus,” Renee commented. “Elliot wasn’t kidding... you suppose they could find a bigger ship?”

Natalie gave an amused hum in response. It was a ridiculously massive ship; the blonde would hate to see who’s wallet had to take that hit.

“Has anyone gotten this big of an entrance? I mean seriously, does anyone else’s even remotely come close?” Renee retorted.

“Am I hearing a little bit of jealousy, Renee?” Natalie teased.

“No,” Renee promptly replied. “Absolutely not. I’d rather be killed than ever get something like that thrown for me. It’s just... Excessive.”

“It’s for the fans, I suppose,” Natalie suggested. “The games have been doing really good this year with the viewings, sponsorships, and all! Maybe they just wanted to- Oh! Look, there he is!” She started, now scrambling to sit up. Unfortunately, she sat up on her elbows, right on top of the skirmisher’s stomach, pressing all her weight against the shorter woman.

Renee let out a hiss. “Nat. Nat. Please, you’ve got to get off of me,” she began to plead.

Natalie blinked and quickly mumbled a quick sorry. She quickly sat up the rest of the way, moving a little and finding extra space on the couch to properly sit. Renee followed soon after, pausing only to stretch her arms and back for a few seconds.

“G’Day Kings Canyon!” Fuse greeted on the screen. He was responded with a momentous amount of cheers and screams from offscreen. Natalie frowned at the thought of actually being there and having to hear those right in her ear. “You lot ready for the biggest party in the Outerlands?” he then exclaimed, now gearing up to set off his signature canon.

“Looks like a fun guy,” Natalie said. Unsurprisingly, she had already moved back over to Renee, now curling into her side. The skirmisher, unsurprisingly, had been expecting it and draped an arm over the other’s shoulders, pulling her just a little closer. “People will like his attitude; I’m sure they’ll eat him up,” she continued, looking over to see her girlfriend’s face. She tried her best to read the other’s face before the skirmisher gave her own thoughts.

“Hm... I want to see him on the battlefield,” Renee replied, narrowing her eyes at the screen. “Then I’ll decide.”

“Oh come on, Renee, you’re being too hard,” Natalie replied, playfully batting her on the side. “He seems nice enough, and his accent is funny- oh,” she abruptly stopped herself. The blonde’s eyes widened, and her mouth was agape. “Uh, Renee, do you think... that’s suppose to happen?”

“Uh...” Renee began, raising an eyebrow at the event playing out on the screen. “No. I don’t think that was suppose to happen.”

And that’s when the shit the fan in Kings Canyon.

They both watched in shock as the scene unfolded on the screen. Civilians being shot at from the huge guns holstered on the ship, secret bombs going off hidden within the orange rock of the canyon, the ship eventually slamming into the ground and ultimately exploding. How they were still able to catch this on film was a mystery.

However, it soon switched to an awfully conveniently commercial. The two still, however, gawked at the television. Natalie drew her legs up onto the couch and essentially hugged them, still trying to decipher what exactly happened. Renee just stared at back at the screen blankly.

It was the skirmisher who finally broke the silence. “Oh my god,” Renee muttered before letting out a groan. “Well, the Syndicate is about to get sued out the ass.” She hopped up off the couch, raising her hands above her head as she stretched out her back. “I’m... gonna get a drink. You want anything, babe?”

“A water... would be great,” she quietly mumbled out. Her eyes were still fixated on the screen.

Renee nodded, gave the other girl’s shoulder a few pats, and went off to the kitchen.

They sure were glad they didn’t go.

“Are you not... are you not phased by this?” Natalie spoke up a little louder just so the skirmisher could hear her while in the kitchen.

“Not really,” Renee called back. Natalie could hear the refrigerator being opened and the contents inside being messed with. “I mean, we see it every day, don’t we?” She then paused, and she peaked over to Natalie. “Nat... do you still have some ice cream left over?”

At that, Natalie shot off the couch. “Absolutely not, you are not eating eating ice cream for lunch!” She huffed, dashing over to the kitchen. “Vous êtes absurde! Rappelle-moi encore pourquoi je t'aime?! And don’t you dare phase!”

Attention already lost, it looked like the events in King Canyon would be touched on at a later date. That is, until Elliot comes limping back or something.

#apex legends #apex wraith #apex wattson #wattson #wraith #darksparks #my fic #again I don’t beta so be forewarned #kind of silly but I had fun #also the ending is a little wonk but I kind of got tired of tinkering with it #still hope y’all enjoy though

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