#no discourse please i will simply die

[sasukimimochi]

i wanna ramble about my view on JC but i'm so bad at words

so like, i see posts where people talk about these things JC does or WWX holds back from, i don't wanna go searching but also want to leave these details out cuz i don't want to accidentally call people out cuz that is not my intention (not that i have the audience to do something like that) so i'm just gonna go from my memory and kinda summarize what i think abt him...

gonna add a read more line bc this gets long!

Uh, btw please no hostility i'm not trying to start arguments, these are just my thoughts i really wanted to get out there. i'm definitely no therapist or psychologist so take this with a grain of salt, this is the view of just an average reader who retains a lot of info [tho still manages to miss details at times]. Anyway if you have info you think i should have addressed, reply and i'll make additions if i agree/want to expand on the info presented to me!

So, WWX and JC have a weird thing going on, it's not exactly brothers but they definitely wanted that, the reason why i say they aren't solidly brothers is because i'm pretty sure Madam Yu has influenced JC from the start of his arrival which is why he doesn't call wwx a-xian or Wei Ying or A-Ying- Why he doesn't allow himself to let loose properly around anyone even in private, why he constantly scolds wwx, etc. i believe firmly he's been quite influenced by his parents due to him being the next sect heir and the pressure that comes from it, as well as what he feels like madam yu is correct on- wwx is uncle jiang's favorite.

Madam Yu still chides Yanli for doing domestic acts for WWX but not on the same level as JC, who is constantly under pressure by her to be the perfect heir to the sect. She wants him to be better than WWX, which of course affects all of the family but Yanli gets left out of the fire a bit, which i think is what gives her such a strength to do these supportive acts for the brothers [and why she's also both the brother's favorite. She's basically the mom they wish for. Supportive, understanding, and helps mediate them]. Though this is a burden she has to bear, it's not that big of a burden to her because she loves the two so much.

Jiang Fengmian... i might be spelling his name wrong, so i'll call him Uncle Jiang cuz it will be faster for me to type with no mistakes haha. Anyway, I have complicated feelings about him.

At first i thought he was great and did no wrong, but that was on my first pass and when i had just watched the donghua only. My opinion of him since i read the novel isn't bad, but it's not super good. He's in a complicated position! There's only so much he can do about his wife, they argue super often and while its not usually crazy loud, it's pretty intense. [also, i'm not sure if separation is really a thing that happened back then, i think that's really a modern thing.] I feel like we're likely seeing Uncle Jiang's will to fight dimmed down by the wear of time.

Consider: you have a family member who won't ever listen to what you say, regardless how sound your argument is- you can be completely in the right and have all the facts, but no matter how long you press on, the result never changes. Do you put in the same amount of effort for the rest of your life? No! You understand that no matter how much you argue that their answer will remain the same. I personally have a family member like this, and while i defend myself regularly, it does not go anywhere. That is the nature of some people, no matter what they may not treat your view with the respect it deserves.

anyway back to the main line here, i dont think wwx is wrong about what he said regarding JF to JC. "he's just hard on you cuz you're going to be sect leader" or whatever it was along those lines- WWX does not seem like the type to lie to make someone feel better and i think this is why JC appreciates that conversation so much (besides the heartfelt twin prides which is obviously something that stuck to him for a long time). And i agree, JF is definitely trying to prepare Jiang Cheng for his position as sect leader one day.

do i think Uncle Jiang is completely guilt free of favoritism? No absolutely not, he canonically holds wwx more as a child, which i think is hard to argue against- but i do think the context of that is missed in part by most. WWX may have been a bright kid with sun shining out his ass but he was also a scared kid that just got rescued off the streets after his parents never came home. A kid that was fighting for food from dogs and likely starving and scared because he was on the street for like 5 years [if i remember it was from age 4 to 9 in the novel]. Of course he got held a bit more- i can't imagine he would be completely unphased immediately upon arrival, at least with his Uncle Jiang who was totally willing to provide him comfort- which wwx probably desperately missed from his now dead parents. We know canonically that the memory of those parents, however small, is unreplaceable and dear to wwx- but having JF treat him dearly is truly a balm to what has happened to him.

I'm not gonna say JC didn't go through things that made him cry and want to be held, in fact if WWX came into the house and suddenly got a lot of attention, it's going to feel pretty shitty for JC! Of course this combined with abruptly losing his privacy and puppies was what initially had him pushing the other away, but as you could see, after WY breaks his leg after running off and they make up, they get really close and despite this looming responsibility and family troubles, the two are very bonded. imo making them look like 6 year olds in the donghua is an injustice to their relationship, because 9 year olds tend tend to have more emotional intelligence (?) at that age. I'm not sure how to phrase that, but basically making them look younger and act like giggling children took away from the scene a bit for me lol. Jc is old enough to realize he doesn't dislike wwx! This isn't a child quickly getting over his anger, he's young here yes, but he's decided in this moment that he cares about this new member of the family, despite being called the son of a servant. [which yes madam yu is once again influencing his view of this segregation but i think he is much better at ignoring this particular in his youth]

I am rambling more than i thought i would lmao- i have a lot of feelings about their relationship and i think it's skipped over so much

um, i'm not sure which direction i was going in before i went onto the parents. Let's skip forward.

lotus pier fell and not only did JC see wwx get humiliated and whipped and nearly disfigured, his mother who he was about to lose blamed wwx for so much. When you lose a family member you have an attachment to, whether it bad or good, this influences your thoughts about them and with no way to resolve said thoughts. i find this hard to explain, so i'm just going to hope you understand what i'm referring to here. Especially in ancient china though, i believe it's a big thing to hold such a high regard for your parents, but especially if they have passed? i can't say this is fact but i believe that is the case i just am sticking to my memory here. So these things in combination with Trauma, i believe starts this heavy, negative emotion in JC that is hard to unstick.

JC and WWX may get into a one-sided scuffle but soon after they cry together like children. They just experienced hundreds of lives lost- people they grew up with and trained with and cared for as well as the people who provided and cared for them- their family was unstable, but still was a family and support system- now they had only two people and one of them was far away, the one that was typically their pillar. I feel like a lot of people hold JC to an impossible standard in his situation- having a bad day and taking it out on someone is one thing, going through a traumatic massacre i think allows someone to get a bit unreasonable [though of course nearly choking him was quite far, remember, he's extremely unstable emotionally at this point].

"WWX didn't do that though!" of course not. WWX is a different person with a different personality, is older (though i don't know by how much), and is extremely resilient, but he does process his trauma just differently. As you see over and over in the novel, wwx goes through many things others wouldn't dream of, but he starts acting differently even before the golden core removal, not only after. He's going through the same things, but i'm pretty sure no one reacts to trauma the same way to the T. JC's just happens to be misplaced anger, which is probably way too simple a way to put it, but anyway...wwx also gets angry. very angry. The two both have the correct target of anger in the end, despite Jc's breakdown. He still harbors his mother's words, but at this point they're still in the background of his mind.

Now again we go forward- JC willingly sacrifices himself for WWX. Look, if he doesn't like wwx at all i think this is extremely contradictory. even if he was s*icidal, he could have chose other ways to get to that end if that was the case. and a gentle reminder that JC perks back up and is ready to fight once he believes WWX knows how to fix his core! i don't think he was truly wanting to die or anything like that until he thought he had lost everything except wwx and jyl. He believes in wwx's strength despite his constant fear of inferiority, so if he was gone, what would it matter if wwx was there to continue to protect yanli?

Essentially he was like 'well what are we going to do if i can't lead the sect? We would be in a homeless situation and there is a war.' aka there's not a lot of hope all around, i don't think he was only upset about the core, but it was definitely the main force because if he didn't have a core, how would he survive what was happening anyway? he's like 'if i'm gonna die let it be on my terms' yk? He also doesn't feel like he's strong enough before he lost his core to protect anyone. Without it? fat chance.

whew... this is a lot already, so maybe i'll post this and do a part two later addressing YLLZ arc, then the "present" one. i just have a lot of feelings about their relationship and i'm sad to see so much negativity around him...JC is quite flawed, but a lot of the characters are flawed! that doesn't make them bad characters, it makes them interesting and human.

[uriekukistan]

JJK 261 ANALYSIS: What happened, how, why Yuuta made the choice he did, and a discussion of tragedy & major themes of JJK

MAJOR spoilers below the cut so please read at your risk.

i wanted to dissect what happened a bit, and address a few points i saw floating around since the leaks dropped. of course, these are all my interpretations, so feel free to disagree, i just had a lot of thoughts floating around that i wanted to put out for discussion.

I. Gojo was never coming back

first of all, i don't know how you guys expected him to survive bisection. i said this earlier in the day as my justification for why i didn't think gojo was coming back, prior to leaks, and i don't think i can say it any better now.

and this is just my interpretation of reverse curse technique, but if anything, yuuta in this chapter supports my theory. in the scene where he's on shoko's table and arata nitta says that he's used rct to keep the wounds from getting worse, but it might be too late for yuuta to recover. in that case, gojo wasn't coming back from being sliced in half. it's just not possible.

additionally, and this is another thing that i've said for a long time. he says right in episode 6 (i forgot the chapter) that his dream is to reset the jujutsu world raise up a generation of strong students that work together. that is why he became a teacher. this very clearly comes from his relationship with suguru, and it's one of gojo's clearest motivations from the beginning.

the problem is, in order to achieve this, he has to die. so long as satoru gojo is alive, he will have to carry the burden of being the strongest alone. his students won't have to work together, because gojo will just take care of everything. this is already in the works, with how many people have come together to stand against sukuna. if gojo lived and defeated sukuna on his own, this wouldn't have happened, and bringing him back would, again, reduce the need for his students work together.

unfortunately, gojo has been doomed by the narrative from the start, and his primary goal as a character basically requires his death to be realized in its entirety.

II. They're not heroes, they're jujutsu sorcerers.

yeah, i'm stealing megumi's line because it's true. he literally said it twice for a reason, and then yuuta said a repackaged version of it in this chapter ("we're about to fight history's strongest jujutsu sorcerer. if we can win by throwing away our humanity, we shouldn't even be arguing about this").

trust, all the characters are well aware of the ethical issues with taking gojo's body after he's dead, both with what it means for gojo, and with what it means for yuuta. but this isn't a story about heroism, this isn't a story about the power of friendship. if it was, yuuji would have saved junpei all the way back at the beginning of the series. it was pretty clear from the start that this wasn't going to be the typical shounen manga like that.

in fact, expecting it to be is unrealistic. it's unrealistic in real life too, if i'm being so honest. everyone wants to think they'd take the moral high road in this type of situation, but the reality is, when you're fighting tooth and nail against an opponent that is fighting dirty, you have to fight dirty too if you want to win, and i think that's what yuuta is trying to point out in this chapter.

this happens in real life wars which im not gonna get into examples because i dont want to start that kind of discourse, but like...it's so great to be idealistic and hope that virtue will triumph simply because it is virtuous, but i think if you take a look around, you'll realize it's true that good people do not get what they deserve simply because they're good (that's so megumi of me to say...). or if you think of it like a board game, if a player is cheating, it is infinitely harder to win without cheating yourself.

maybe this is a bit pessimistic of me to say, but you will not win a dirty fight without getting dirty yourself, and i think it's pretty clear that sukuna fights dirty.

additionally, it's shitty to see gojo be weaponized, and i understand that, but it plays into the themes about strength in jjk, which i will get into.

III. This was not an "ass pull."

i don't really have much to say to this. did you think yuuta wouldn't take kenjaku's technique? plus, kenjaku being eaten by rika is probably the only surefire way to ensure that they're dead and won't just hop to another body. i've already said why gojo wouldn't come back, but it makes sense that if yuuta were to copy kenjaku's technique, who else would he body hop into, if not gojo? there's already narrative evidence to support this action, from the guidelines of yuuta's technique, kenjaku's technique, and gojo's technique, to the character of yuuta okkotsu, which i want to do an analysis in a separate post for him, so i won't get into that right now.

idk...to me, all the threads connect, plus i felt like yuuta's return was foreshadowed pretty heavily in 259 & 260, with the mention of yuuta's plan that yuuji couldn't know, and then on the last page of 260, the comparison of sukuna and yuuta, so for me, i always thought that it was not actually gojo, but yuuta at the end of 260.

IV. Themes of JJK: The burden of being "the strongest," or even just strong

even many jjk fans see gojo as "the strongest," and nothing more, doing exactly what the narrative sets up as one of the chief problems of jjk. a lot of gojo's actions are spurred on by the burden he feels from being the strongest modern sorcerer. his entire character is built around this problem of the responsibility and burden that falls on someone who's considered to be "the best" at anything.

in fact, this is also a driving point for geto too, and the conflicts geto and gojo come into with each other, as well as geto's inevitable fall from grace. it all comes from this issue that's at the core of jujutsu society. gojo recognizes that, and, as i mentioned, that is why he became a teacher. so that no young sorcerers will feel the burden of being the strongest alone.

the problem is this is easier said than done. after gojo dies, this burden gets passed down to yuuta, and he feels that immense pressure, which is why he decides to do what he does. he says "haven’t we been pushing the burden of being a monster onto gojo-sensei alone? if gojo-sensei is gone, then who else will be the monster? If no one intends to become one, then I will!" and i think this really powerful evidence of the pressure and burden of being the strongest, and i think the word monster is really important here. the burden pushes people to be something they're not, a shadow of their true self.

it distorts morality, like with geto. it isolates people, like with gojo. it forces people to go to unspeakable lengths to uphold their burden, like with yuuta. it leads people with immense power to doubt themselves, like with megumi. it leads people to feel like a cog in the machine, not a human, like with yuuji.

this is sooo so important and a key theme of jjk, and this chapter in particular, and the driving force behind yuuta's actions.

V. Themes in JJK: Loneliness and Isolation

this one has, in my opinion, a bigger role in the story overall than just in this chapter.

as i mentioned before, gojo is lonely. the only person who could understand him was geto, and he turned away from him, and then died. he seems like a silly guy or whatever, but it's just a mask.

but geto also felt alone and isolated, and that's why he turned away. between gojo and geto, neither of them were able to put share the burden of carrying their strength alone, and it's what kept them apart and made their relationship so tragic.

arguably, and though he would never admit it, sukuna is also lonely, though it's buried deep within him and something he will likely never acknowledge, despite it, and his lack of understanding of love (arguably a symptom of his loneliness), are major reasons for the way he acts.

yuuta, though supported by maki, inumaki, and panda in a way that the previously mentioned characters are not, is still isolated. he alone carries the burden of his strength. he was also alone his whole life after rika died, and then again when he was shipped off to africa, away from his friends (yeah he had miguel, maybe i'm missing something, but i dont see them having that type of relationship.

not only that, but yuuta recognizes gojo's loneliness, and reaches out to tell him not to try to stand by himself once again, and gojo admits that's something he can't do, the reason being his relationship with geto.

even further, yuuji and megumi, the parallel to satosugu, are both deeply lonely, except for when they have each other. i mentioned in this analysis that the reason megumi can't just get up and keep going is because he's alone and has been for over a month. i want to get into this more in my next point.

VI. Where I think (hope) this leads for JJK

a satisfying ending for jjk, in my opinion, would be the resolution to this loneliness and burden of strength issue that has been present throughout the narrative. something like yuuji being able to save megumi and them being able to correct what went wrong with satosugu in their own relationship.

personally would like to see satosugu reach the ending they should have had through the itafushi parallels - let them save each other! but i do know gege said only one of them (the trio + gojo) will die, or only one will live....that was years ago maybe he changed his mind :D

we all want to see yuuji take down sukuna himself, but i think it would be a great resolution to see everyone take down sukuna as a team. no one person is alone, no one person has the burden of the strongest. i know i said this wasn't a "power of friendship" manga, and i stand by that, but i think this would be the perfect ending. yuuta throws his humanity away to do what he did in 261 because he felt like it was the only choice and it was something he alone could do, but yuuji represents unwavering humanity (literally his name), and i think to preserve that, they all need to share that burden. let them realize they need each other.

this is what gojo died for, and this is what he lived for. this is why he became a teacher in the first place- to raise a generation that can be strong together, that can support one another.

VII. "It's poorly written torture porn!" "There's no point if there's no happy ending!" etc

i said this in a separate post but tragedies have existed in literature since the 6th century BCE, 2600 years ago. many of the most popular stories throughout history have been tragedies, for example, orpheus & eurydice, romeo & juliet, even things like the fault in our stars and the titanic movie. here's a quick explanation of what it means for a story to be a tragedy (yeah it's from wikipedia but they want me to pay to access the original source and im not doing that for a jjk analysis)

one of things i like most about this definition is the use of the word "catharsis," which is to say that the expression of strong emotions is a way of bringing about renewal and relief. in literature, it's used to say that with the arousal and following release of negative emotions relieves suppressed emotions for the viewer. im not gonna get too personal with it, but i know i've experienced this with jjk.

additionally all of the aforementioned tragedies, they have a message, no matter how sad they are. orpheus & eurydice inspires perseverance and faith in the gods. even something like titanic has messages about everlasting love that overcomes all boundaries. jjk has its message too, and it's long underway. we just have to wait for it to reach its conclusion.

it's easy to lose sight of the bigger picture when we only get one chapter a week, and the fact that the pain is so dragged out is a bit tiring, i'll admit. but that doesn't mean it's bad. having negative emotions stirred by a story doesn't mean bad writing. i mean, i would hope you feel sad. i would hope you feel angry. i would be concerned if you didn't. but given that jjk is a tragedy, that just indicates good writing. especially these last two chapters, i've felt moved in a way nothing else has done for me in a long time.

as always, these are just my thoughts!!! im happy to hear from anyone what they think :D

[thegoldencontracts]

Every Unethical Act Azul Has Committed (And Why None Of Them Were Actually Illegal)

We don't even need this list. I know, I know. But it was funny.

Notes: This may seem a bit redundant but clarification, discourse, and the like are always welcome! I'm not a lawyer, so please tell me if I've made any errors.

Slavery- It's legal based on some very specific technicalities that I will go into if you ask - Basically, it's boiled down to he likely can claim this as an employment agreement with a TRAP clause which is unethical but still technically legal. There's been some movements to make it illegal but none have been fruitful yet (not in the US, at least).

Child Labor and Contracts With Minors - The way he went about it is unethical, yes, but this is legal because 1. They were above the legal working age in most states 2. Crowley seems to have agreed to the Mostro Lounge's work and approved their hours and 3. Contracts signed by minors aren't automatically voided, they simply have an option to be voided with parental approval.

Possession of Property - He rendered the main character homeless, which is deeply unethical, but once again, not illegal. They signed the contract agreeing to give him their home, and he didn't actively threaten them. Crowley could be held liable for child neglect, but Azul's hands are (legally but definitely not ethically) scot-free.

Assault - We've never actually received canon proof that Azul attempts murder. Though other Overblotters are shown doing so, Azul hasn't. Also, the reason we stop the overblotters is for their own safety -they'll die if he don't. His true Unique Magic could still count as assault, though. Here, his defense is automastim, though whether it'd be classified as insane or sane I'm not quite sure.

Blackmail - Wording. Wording is everything. Blackmail is a crime, but Azul's wording makes it so he isn't technically blackmailing anyone.

Bribery - See previous section.

Solicitation - When Azul sends out the twins to harass clients. Wording is once again key here. Azul sent them out, by technicality, to 'assist' in dealing with clients. Add onto this that Jade doesn't usually do much in terms of physical harm and suddenly - Would you look at that? Floyd just happened to harm the client. Look at him, so short-tempered. Tsk. He's the only one with legal issues here, not Azul and Jade! (Side-Note: F in the chat for Floyd)

None of this is meant to woobify Azul. In fact, I believe this serves as a testament to his skill with loopholes <3

[zoophilic-disorder]

🌱 Welcome to my account for people like me (but really anyone).

This is a primarily positivity blog for those with zoophilia, but I will work to have education, discussion, and community as well.

If you're a zoophile and struggle with finding any sort of community outside of pro-contact/animal abuse rings, please have hope. There are resources and places for you to be okay and not worry about harming an animal. These thoughts can be violent, scary, and deeply uncomfortable and unsettling, but you will be okay, and you will not act on them.

Feel free to send requests for posts! (ie. "Can you make affirmations for zoos who..."Can you make a positivity post for zoos who are..." or anything really, as long as it's relevant).

🌱 This blog advocates for:

• destigmatization of paraphilias, primarily zoophilia.

• anti harassment against anyone.

• pro fiction- acting out fantasies and attractions in fictional settings to cope does not make you a bad person, and you are not failing at "repressing" your paraphilia.

• anti offending/contact stances for any paraphilia that's harmful to act on. there will be no posts that cater towards other stances.

• understanding that paraphilias cannot be "cured" and instead must be accepted and coped with healithy to survive.

• saving people. you should not die simply because you have a paraphilia, your life is valuable and wanted, and you are not disgusting.

🌱 About Me & Tag Key below the line...

My name is Sprout (they/them)!

I'm 21 years old, and I'm physically disabled, which may cause me to post less than I want due to flareups. I'm also wasian- I'm unsure if this will be entirely relevant here, but I'm mentioning it regardless in case discussions come up about the POC community (especially asian) when it comes to paraphiles, and the differing experiences.

And of course, I've suspected being a zoophile since I was a young child.

I've struggled with thoughts, urges, and attractions for a long time, bringing in self-harmful or otherwise self-destructive behavior. I've been riddled with guilt for simply existing and having a disorder I had no control over, one that made me absolutely miserable (and still does to an extent).

Looking for community was impossible. It felt like there were two sides- people who wanted those like me dead, and people who genuinely wanted to act on their thoughts. Both were insufferable, but I ended up choosing the side that hated zoophiles out of disgust and fear.

I also wasn't certain at the time whether what I was experienced was zOCD, or an actual zoophilic disorder. This year, 2024, is when I finally came to the understanding I do not have zOCD, it became impossible to ignore anymore. I felt so ashamed and embarrassed, with nowhere to go.

I wonder if the reason the pro-beastiality side of the community got so large is because people kept running out of options and eventually gave up looking for a better one.

So I want to try and help mend that, and try to start proper support groups for those like me, who just want a shoulder to lean on, someone to talk to, and comfort.

🌱 Tagging System

#🐾 discussion - talking about zoophilia in any way. I wish this was a general tag that all zoos would use so we could find each other, since any other zoo tag is entirely taken over by people who want us dead.

#🐾 help - resources and advice.

#🐾 positivity - positivity posts specifically for zoos.

#🐾 therian - posts catered towards therian with zoophilia.

#🐾 system - posts catered towards systems with zoophilia.

#🐾 sadist - posts catered towards zoosadists. (im not a zoosadist, if I spread misinformation please let me know).

-

#🍐 positivity - general posts for positivity, not aimed specifically at zoos.

#ask recieved - answering asks.

#snarling - discourse or potentially triggering discussion.

[sirius-the-lonely-angel]

⁑⁑⁑⁑⁑✩ 🌞 Welcome 🌞 ✩⁑⁑⁑⁑⁑

🪽 Names >>> Sirius, Star, Angel, Anything You Want.

🪽 Age >>> Ageless And Immortal [As Far As I’m Aware].

🪽 Species >>> Angel.

🪽 Pronouns, Gender, And Sexuality >>> He/It/They/Angel/Wing/Eye/🪽/🌞 + more along those themes. Bigender, Demiboy and Agender. AroAce.

🪽 Terms For Me >>> Nonhuman, Alterbeing. NO Human or Alterhuman please.

🪽 Purpose >>> To bring comfort to those who are lost or feel lost, whether in life or the afterlife.

🪽 Beliefs >>> I have no clue if there is a higher power, and there is no place like Heaven or Hell, at least not for me. There is a good place, but I don’t think there is a bad place. I think the ones that are bad in life either are allowed into the good place and become good in the afterlife automatically, or do not enter into the afterlife at all. They simply die. There are no other Angels, nor are there Demons, not that I can see or hear or sense. Although, I would be happy to know if there are any else.

🪽 [Mild] Description >>> I have three eyes, one at the center of my head above the pair of eyes that are placed “normally” on humans or creatures. I have small white wings right behind my ears, and two pairs of white wings on my back. I am Shape-Shifting, appearing to each and every being differently, based on what is most comfortable to them, although I always have three eyes and all my wings in every form I take [I do not control this; sometimes I wish I could].

🪽 More About >>> Technically, I am Otherkin, and I am quite nonhuman in other ways as well (I have quite a lot of nonhuman ‘types). I am physically nonhuman, transspecies, humanfluid, voidpunk, sunnonhuman, and pseudohuman. Yes, I believe I was an Angel in a Past Life, and all of my nonhumanity is due to Past Lives.

🪽 Piggy-Backing Off The Last Thing I Wrote >>> Do I believe in Past Lives as an Angel? I’m not quite sure. I have very limited beliefs as an Angel, more that there are a lot of good things, people, and creatures, and that everyone deserves good things. I do not think much about spiritual things, about anything other than what I can see or sense.

🪽 Other >>> I am incredibly lonely, and often think too much. I would love having companions, whether nonhuman or human, or anything in between.

🪽 Things Of Importance >>> I am technically a minor (16). I am taken by an amazing and sweet mate (@sawyeryaps @theremixedcreature). I am very queer, very neurodivergent, and disabled. Please use tone tags with me. Please do not flirt with me. And please do not spread hate here. I do not tolerate bigots, fights, discourse, or anything else that makes me uncomfortable. If you are unsure if you are allowed here, please send in an ask with the description for why you feel that way, and I will let you know. Please feel very free to send in asks about whatever, whenever. Remember you are loved and seen.

🪽 Credit To Those Who Made The Dividers >>> @/enchanthings and @/xurengu0

[utilitycaster]

I know there have been many Takes about Laudna and Orym after latest episode. Yours saying that this is not a bad development for Orym is interesting to me because my knee-jerk reaction while watching was being horrified he went so cold about Bor’Dor’s death. But after some time, I guess him finally choosing to be pragmatic after days torn by his own idealism would be a much healthier route for him in the long run.

I want to know what you think about Ashton, though. Some people are saying, they “let” Laudna kill Bor’Dor because they thought it’s what she needed. That sits wrong with me because Laudna made that decision and she’s not a child, but Ashton is my favorite character and I can’t help think I am biased lol.

Please excuse my badly structured sentences, I’m not native speaker.

Hi anon! Your English is great!

I think this is a revealing question in that, in fandom, I think a lot of people lead with "well, obviously, my favorite character is clearly morally in the right, or, failing that, the character I don't like is morally in the wrong" rather than considering the situation, the context, the genre norms, what makes for the most interesting story, etc. So recognizing that Ashton's your favorite and that might be coloring your opinion puts you ahead of a lot of people.

Anyway: I think it can be true both that Laudna made her own decision and that Ashton could, had they wanted, chosen to make an effort to stop her and they didn't. I don't think that means Ashton is responsible for what Laudna did per se, but I also don't personally think he had a moral imperative to save Bor'Dor. I think someone who thinks he did have that moral imperative might disagree, but they should also be blaming Laudna just as much in that case.

Someone else remarked to me that based on the discourse you'd think Orym - the only person who did not attack or restrain Bor'Dor - executed him in cold blood. Just to recap the fight: we only really had one round during which Orym gave Prism a potion to heal her up and did bait and switch to protect her; Ashton hit, with non-lethal intent; Deni$e restrained Bor'Dor; Laudna cast Hunger of the Shadow, knocking Bor'Dor unconscious; and Prism punched him. The following round was technically not run as combat in initiative order, and had it been, Bor'Dor could theoretically have died of a failed death save before Laudna's turn, but Orym and Deni$e made no attacks and Ashton chose to lead away Prism. Probably any of the three martial class characters could, had they wanted to, stopped Laudna. None of them did.

Which I think goes back to the second paragraph: In the end? I think most people are making their judgments of whether or not they think Bor'Dor should die, and even further back to whether or not the Ruby Vanguard is a cultish, terrorist organization, deciding on whether his death was justified or not, and then, if they think it was not, pinning blame on the character they like least. You can argue for any, though frankly, I think Orym is the weakest argument: Laudna is the one who literally killed him, both knocking him unconscious and taking the final death save. Prism took the most death saves with her punch. Ashton dealt a significant amount of damage and did not intervene when Laudna had an unconscious Bor'Dor at her mercy. Deni$e is the one who initially brought up her suspicions, forcing Bor'Dor's hand, and similarly made no physical effort to stop anyone. Orym indicated his approval to Laudna and did not try to stop her.

I think that had Bor'Dor not attacked the party, and had instead simply run away, tracking him down and killing him would have been excessive, but on the other hand, he had a lot of information that could have been extremely dangerous to Bells Hells, so at the very least I think they needed to take him prisoner; but he's not wanted by any specific legal system, so I think he'd just be their hostage, dragged along, indefinitely, as they attacked his friends over and over again. There isn't a nice, neat solution where everyone is happy. Deradicalization is an admirable goal, but it requires a massive amount of effort and resources that I don't think Bells Hells have, and no one should be expected to deradicalize someone who is actively committing violence against them. Once Bor'Dor attacked, to me, this became self-defense and an admission that he was lost: that he'd spent several days with them during which they were kind to him, but because of their ideologies, he attempted to kill them anyway. At that point, I don't fault any of the characters present for killing him/letting him be killed in response.

I guess the last point I'll make is that while, in terms of empathy, there is obviously a huge difference between killing someone regretfully, and killing someone and relishing it, they are, in the end, dead either way. I don't interpret Orym's behavior as cold, but rather merely calm acceptance that he can no longer avoid the inevitable war - and I do think that acting as though Orym's subjectivity in this situation is problematic while ignoring that Prism and Laudna were in no way objective either is an incredibly poorly considered argument, and deeply unfair- but in the end, whether Orym is stoic or whether he breaks down crying, Bor'Dor is still dead. I am not going to fault a character for having an outward emotional reaction that doesn't match what I think it should be when I think their motivations were reasonable.

[askinkiskarma]

Hi x i wanted to talk about something that has happened to me recently, because i feel like it needs to be addressed lol. I would have never considered talking about it if the person in question had had an ounce of maturity and respect, but she obviously doesn’t, and it’s my reputation on the line and my fault for expecting it hahahah.

So a few days ago, the whole Jake is Jacob debacle happened on tumblr, which to me was cute and harmless and fun. Now some people really feel the need to bring other people down and prove (to themselves only, let’s be honest) how “superior” and “intelligent” they are, so she started making fun and basically insulting the OP of the post, which really upset me. I didn’t say anything about it and quietly unfollowed the person, because if i find content I disagree with, that is (to me) the only way to approach the situation.

Anyway, later, i was made aware that she continued trash talking people in the fandom, continuing this tired narrative that despite being the one to initiate it, she was the “victim” bullied by “kids”, which i resented, for a couple of reasons.

1. Ageism is ageism no matter the form it comes in. It is no different to shit on a person just for being young and minding their business, than it is to do so with people who are older.

2. I’m tired of the “i was here first and therefore i am inherently better than you” stupid narrative. You don’t get a cookie cause you found something sooner, pls PLEASE understand that.

3. The “everyone is so young” bs is simply not true. I am the same age as her, so are some of my mooties or just a couple years older, and we’re all here, and we’re all trying to have a good time, and that’s what matters. None of us are out here flaunting our age or our maturity, because it is inconsequential.

4. Saying to someone that their “pre-frontal cortex” isn’t fully developed, is fucking ridiculous. What a stupid argument. You’re really going to insult someone for something they have reasonably absolutely no control over and try to use it as an insult against them? Girlie, in 2023? Do you understand how stupid that is? You think you’re superior cause your mum pushed you out a few years earlier like you had anything to do with it??? Like idk that is wild to me.

5. You can’t insult people on here for “being young and dumb” and how much “better” and “more mature” you are, and then in the same breath pick a fight with them and be willing to die on that hill. Because if you have any sort of common sense, that would imply that you must be succumbing to their levels and you are not capable of having any higher level discourse. Like how do you not see that that you're just proving to everyone how immature you truly are?

So, i wrote her an ask. Not on anon, not trying to start anything, just an ask telling her my opinion and telling her that as someone who is the same age as her, her behaviour is disappointing.

Now i need you to see the message because she won’t show it to you, because she wants to build this narrative that people are “harassing” her. Please note that nobody is “harassing” her. If i wanted to harass her, I could and I would not do it with my username intact. I wanted to her to understand the opinion (that i share with my friends and mooties) of someone who’s the same age as her. She won’t answer it because she knows there is no way to spin this in her favour.

Instead, what she can do, is what she does best. Trying to spin this negatively, insulting me and my writing (you’re 26 and the best you could come up with is “god awful cringey ass fics”? ouch, that hurt.) and tagging it “neteyam imagine” cause what person who wants to read neteyam fics doesn’t want to see that. Now again, she is blocked for me because I absolutely do not want to engage with people like her, but i was made aware of this and since she’s talking about me and could potentially come to people’s inboxes or dms and talking trash about me, i wanted you besties to know and to read everything and make your own minds about it, having all the information, not just what she deems appropriate to give you.

Anyway, sorry for this long ass rant, but it needed to be said. Please, if you don’t agree with someone, especially if it’s over something so incredibly trivial as a name, let it go. It’s not worth it. If it’s something not trivial, block. It’s not worth it. Insulting someone for things they have no control over doesn’t put you on top, it makes you a dick. Acting like you’re inherently better cause you’ve been in a fandom longer isn’t cool, trust me. Just please, save your energy and put it in your art, in your job, in your relationships, in yourself.

Now, i will go write my cringey ass fics 😉 good luck besties, and smooches.

ALSO!!! DO NOT engage with this person. PLEASE. Please do not prove her right. Please do not leave her anon hate or anything of the sort, please please please. It’s not worth it.

[web-novel-polls]

Best (Web Novel) Hater Tournament

Last Updated: July 27th, 2024 - Please check the original post for updates

Submissions Closed - Masterpost here

[Plain Text: Submissions Closed /end pt]

Rules:

Must be from a web novel or adaptation

Can be a hater of any kind or just have the hater soul

Please submit one character per response (no limit overall)

Tournament Tag: #best hater tournament

Arthur Galvhan from Unlucky Clover

Submission: Legitimately nominating him because he's such a hateful piece of shit that his irrational hatred causes the apocalypse. That is simply an impressive amount of being an absolute asshole. 

Han Sooyoung from Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint

Submission: She spent years hating on a web novel similar to her own through an anonymous account and hate reading the comments it's sole reader posted. Even after the novel came to life, she still kept criticizing its horrible writing and protagonist. 

Hua Cheng from Heaven Official’s Blessing 

Submission: Treats nearly everyone that isn't Xie Lian with derision

Wiki Link

Jiang Cheng from Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation

Submission 1: Hates Wangxian's relationship. 

Submission 2: Dude devoted more than a decade of his life to hating on his dead kind-of-brother (it's complicated) how has he not been submitted already? bonus points for his actor's many faces of utter disgust in The Untamed 

Mod Propaganda: Haterism so bad you can start fandom discourse just by name-dropping him. 

Wiki Link

Jun Wu from Heaven Official’s Blessing

Submission: 

(Spoilers) Tossing his old pals into lava and then destroying an entire generation of gods wasn't enough! He also ground the old generation of gods up and made them into the foundation of the new Heavenly Realm, so everyone steps all over them whenever they're walking around. Also an over simplified explanation of the entire plot is basically Jun Wu hears one phrase that sets him off and decides to be a giant hater because of it, destroying a whole kingdom within like three to four years in the process. This guy is the epitome of "...and I took that personally."

Wiki Link

Lan Jingyi from Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation 

Submission: jingyi hates su she so much even though they've never interacted before and then absolutely obliterates him verbally in front of almost every sect leader, what a legend

Lan Wangji from Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation / MDZS

Submission: Just because he's quiet doesn't mean he's not a hater. He gets his hate across economically. Jin Guangyao? Hated. Su She? Hated. Jiang Cheng? Don't even ask. Loathed entirely. Anyone else not in his immediate family (including problematic cancelled husband Wei Wuxian)? Not even worth his time. Bro even hates himself (sometimes) 

Mu Qing from Heaven Official’s Blessing

Submission: https://www.tumblr.com/bonesblubs/708661194148511744/inspiration 

Mod Propaganda: Mu Qing can split a tower bell in two yet can’t admit he wanted to be friends with someone he’s known for 800+ years without trying to immediately kill himself. Randomly started reciting a poem about his least favorite coworker’s dick just to fuck with him (Feng Xin). Said he’d kill a bride like Xie Lian if she was sent to him. 

Wiki Link

Shen Jiu / Original Shen Qingqiu from The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving 

"Even if all of this could be redone from the beginning, in the end, the conclusion would remain the same. My heart is full of malice, my insides hatred and resentment. Today, Luo Binghe wishes for me to die horribly, and I only have myself to blame." - Shen Jiu, The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System, Volume 4: Chapter 24 (Reddit 1, 2)

Submission: Both the Shen Qingqius are haters just in very different ways 

Mod Propaganda: The Scum Villain that beefed with a 14-year-old out of jealousy & tried to kill him. 

Wiki Link

Shen Yuan/Qingqiu from The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System 

Submission 1: He was an anti fan that literally got so mad at a novel he was reading that he died and then was transmigrated into the novel he hated (besides the main character) as the villain. The author of said novel also transmigrated and they formed a love/hate broship.

Submission 2: 

My man is the hater-est hater to ever hate, except like Kendrick Lamar. He hate-read a webnovel with over 20 million words, and left scathing commentary on every single chapter. Even the author Shang Qinghua, of the webnovel PIDW, which by subtext was very very popular, knew Shen Yuan (Peerless Cucumber) as the legendary anti-fan.  He hated it (everything except the protagonist Luo Binghe) so much that after reading the last chapter, he choked and died (...slight exaggeration). Shen Yuan also proceeded to transmigrate into the novel, make everyone fall in love with him, use the power of headpats and 'a smile from the cold beauty' to overturn the genre from harem-esqe to danmei, bending the protagonist. Tldr, the power of Shen Yuan's haterism turned Cool Edgy Awesomely Powerful Protagonist Luo Binghe to soggy wet clingy white lotus bing-bong Bingmei, and it's honestly better off this way <3 

Submission 3: he's an internet hater screenname Peerless Cucumber who hates this webnovel so much he dies and transmigrates into it to fix the entire plot and also he's left so many hate comments the author (fellow transmigrator) knows and remembers who he is after being in the webnovel world for decades. Dedication.

Su She from Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation / MDZS

“Stop thinking so highly of yourself. Who told you I cursed Jin Zixuan in order to frame you? Back then, I wasn’t working for Sect Leader at all. I cursed him simply because I wanted to!” ….Su She, “Those as arrogant as him--I’ll kill every single one who comes my way!” - Su She to Wei Wuxian, Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation, EXR, Chapter 104

No propaganda submitted

Mod Propaganda: Haterism so bad he straight up made a new sect. Cursed Jin Zixun. Has beef with a guy who barely knows he exists. 

Wiki Link

Yin Hanjiang from Devil Venerable Also Wants to Know 

Submission: Second half of the novel YHJ in particular, hater energy unmatched! Righteous sects? fuck them up. His own sect? on eggshells. His best effort at not murdering someone is to start wiping his weapon with their clothes. General vibe of 'if anything happened to Venerable i'd kill everyone in this room and then myself AND SOMETHING JUST HAPPENED TO VENERABLE'. Anyway get their asses babe <3

Yu Ziyuan from Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation

Submission: I would not blame anyone who went through the first half of the story believing that Yu Ziyuan hated every single person she ever met because she talks shit about her husband, her son, her adopted son, and her daughter whenever she gets the chance to. Sometimes all at the same time. She projects so much raw hater energy that she psychologically scarred her son for life. 

Dealer's Choice

Qi Rong from Heaven Official’s Blessing

“Obviously, those things weren't within the realm of consideration for Qi Rong. He swore like there wasn't a single person in the Three Realms he didn't want cursed to death. He called Pei Ming a rotten manwhore, Little Pei a kiss-ass, Jun Wu a faker, Ling Wen a damned bitch, Lang Qianqiu a moron, Quan Yizhen dog shit, the Water Master blackhearted, the Wind Master a tramp–he probably didn't know Shi Qingxuan was actually a man.” - Heaven Official’s Blessing (Tumblr)

[animentality]

Can I just say as a lesbian with a lesbian Durge - when it comes to Gortash I imagine that she and him were absolutely inseparable besties. They absolutely meant the world to each other and loved each other, but platonically. I still love them and the insane ride or die bestfriendship dynamic I imagine for them. And then I also have a gay dude Durge, the default dragonborn, and I ship him with Gortash. So, two Durges, two timelines, two perfectly valid interpretations of the relationship based on in-game evidence, and zero issues. It is really not that difficult!

(People might as well complain “what about my lesbian Tav” in response to all the Astarion/Tav shipping like. Lol. So I don’t understand how anyone is trying to make the relative popularity of Durgetash amongst people with gay or bi Durges a point of general contention tbh. More likely someone is just annoyed by the ship but couldn’t just say that and had to make up discourse about it.)

Anyway, the elephant in the room is this. Won’t someone PLEASE think of the poor straight man Durges? Forced into homosexuality with Gortash, by all 10 Durgetash shippers on the internet??? How will they ever recover?????

ANON, you hit the nail on the head.

They just don't like Gortash. And I don't CARE. I know most people DON'T.

None of my friends get it at ALL. But they're still my friends.

I think Dark Urge fans are just in smaller supply than regular Tavs, so you take Dark Urge content wherever you can...and it just so happens, that Durgetash fans are highly active.

And they're just disgruntled because they want us to obsess with THEIR OCs, like bro, come on now.

We all get to play with our own OCs here. The Dark Urge is just an origin.

No one said your lesbian Durge had to do anything. No one ever put a gun to your head and said, love Enver.

Imagine your OC kissing him.

Ugh. I hate Twitter discourse.

It's a bunch of "unpopular take but-" and then followed by the most popular take in existence.

No one but a small fringe group of lunatics likes Gortash.

Just leave us alone and chill the fuck out.

Go attack Astarion girlies for making tav a straight woman every time.

Also, anon, about your lesbian durge...that's the beauty of durgetash.

It's subtle in the game, so if you want to pretend they weren't hooking up...then they weren't hooking up.

It's literally so subtle, most people just don't notice it.

All you have to acknowledge is, they once worked together.

You don't have to imagine them banging if you don't want to.

They could, simply be, simply roommates.

So I don't get the hand wringing and the pearl clutching.

The game is soooo milquetoast on confirming canon behaviors from both the dark urge and tav anyway, that you could straight up headcanon just about anything, and have it make sense.

in fact, i wish durgetash WAS more prominent, so as you said, the majority straight male audience of bg3 who plays the dark urge would be forced to confront their character being a little bicurious, lmao.

[danmei-confessions]

Not to jump on the JGY discourse badwagon, and please don't tag this with JGY for reasons I'm about to outline, but what JGY fans consider 'bashing' is really absurd to me. I've never been in a fandom like this. I admit, I'm new to the fandom and there seems to be a lot of history that has caused people to become over-sensitive but BOY OH BOY are they over-sensitive.

I've seen people accused of bashing JGY for calling him a villain. Which is just... true? I suppose if you prefer the term antagonist but people often (erroneously) use the terms interchangeably and antagonist is a more accurate definition of his placement in the story (antagonist being a character who is opposed to the protagonist, regardless of morals or who might be 'right' or 'wrong'). I think there's a fair case to be made for defining him as a 'villain' as well but I think there's a fair case to define most of the characters in MDZS as 'villains' so that isn't really meant as some sort of condemnation of his character, just an acknowledgement that he has done villainous things and some of those villainous things for villainous reasons. All that to say, I do think it's totally fair to have interpretations of his character that are far more blameless. It is a story from an unreliable narrator so if you choose to read the narrative as being completely inaccurate with regards to him, I think that's actually a really fair interpretation of the text. I prescribe to a watsonian death-of-the-author view of literature so whatever you get out of the text is an entirely valid interpretation. My point is merely that it's an equally valid interpretation to view him as a 'villain' and calling him such, especially in a series such as MDZS, is a neutral statement. And yes, someone could use the label of villain as a jumping off point to start bashing him but what I'm trying to point out is the fans who call it 'bashing' if you call him a villain alone, regardless of whether the person calling him a 'villain' is a fan of his character or not.

And that's only one example. People have been accused of bashing him for simply stating things that he did within the novel. Which again, it's totally fair to interpret things like NMJ's death as justified or unjustified depending on your interpretation of the text but the fact is that he did it. It's also fair to think his involvement in JRS and QS death is dubious at best, but it's also a fair to interpret the text that he did do it. So again, if someone says "he killed JRS and QS" that is not bashing, that's just saying a thing that is entirely possible within the text. It would be bashing if they say "he killed JRS and QS and that's why he's the worst character ever and he should die etc etc etc" and I'm sure that this hyper-sensitive fans have dealt with that sort of nonsense in the past and that is why they're so hypersensitive and quick to call everything bashing, but it is really odd to watch.

Basically any statement that's even mildly uncharitable or even just goofing on his character a bit (in a light hearted or affectionate way) I've seen be called bashing. At this point, it feels to me as an outsider looking in that the only way you're 'allowed' to engage with his character is if you have the absolute most charitable interpretation of him. You can't be a villain-fucker who likes a morally dubious and manipulative guy, you have to interpret him as the most innocent little guy who never did anything wrong or you're bashing him.

And it's just very absurd to me. I'm a fandom veteran in my 40's and I've been through so many fandoms over the years and I've never seen any fandom be quite like this about a character. Yes, the JC defenders are also quite obsessive but from my perspective, I've seen more of them willing to acknowledge JC's faults than the JGY fans (of course, this is completely anecdotal and it's entirely possible that I've just only seen small portions of both fanbases that made one of them seem more defensive and aggressive than the other, in which case I do apologize. I'm really not trying to be uncharitable). But even with JC and XY and other widely contentious characters, I still see a lot more defensive/aggressive behavior than I'm used to seeing in other fandoms.

Again, this is anecdotal and just my path through fandoms and as a long-time villain-fucker, but in all the other fandoms I've been a part of it's been "omg he's the worst and that's why I love him" or even "he's the worst, why do I love him" or just any iteration of "I love this character, he's the best to me, but yeah he does shitty stuff sometimes".

This is just I guess an actual confession rather than real discourse because I'm not really interested in having discourse over this. I'm a bit exhausted seeing all the discourse and I might even start distancing myself from the fandom because the more I talk about it, the more I realize it's just a lot more exhausting for me than I realized. This is just an observation and a confession about how I've felt while observing the hyper-defensive nature of some fans within this fandom. Mostly just triggered by seeing someone comment "stop putting bashing in the tag" and I read the post and I was really struggling to see what the bashing was. Again, maybe there's dog-whistles I'm blind to or maybe people are just too hurt over past drama to see clearly or maybe I'm just too old for this stuff. I guess I'm just used to bashing to be... bashing? Not "look I love the guy but he's kinda mean lol" or "he's a good villain".

Back in my day (LOL) bashing was just defined differently I guess.

Anyway, continue to love your blorbo and in any way that brings you joy, I'm not the blorbo police.

For the record, JGY is my favorite character and I find him deeply sympathetic even in less charitable interpretations of the text. I just like who he is, regardless of whether he's 'justified' or 'good'. My personal interpretation of his character is somewhere in between the most charitable and most uncharitable. I think he's a good person in an impossible position who had to struggle for everything in life and those struggles twisted him up inside until he made lots of mistakes and committed a lot of unforgivable acts. His story is tragic to me and deeply engaging. And the fact that I wrote this up as a huge JGY fan and I don't want it tagged because I legitimately think there are parts of the JGY fanbase who would interpret this as bashing is why I think I need to give up this fandom.

.

[colemckenzies]

Jesus Christ Superstar: Ultimate Edition

this easter It Is Time. using my years of fixation and research i present to you The Best Version of every song from jesus christ superstar, plus commentary. obviously subjective opinion so do feel free to discourse in the tags bc as you may have picked up i enjoy talking about the relative merits of jcs productions. also i might not even stand by this in a week bc i find it hard to keep multiple versions in my head at the same time for comparison and there are so so many versions.

please note that acting, vocal quality, music direction, and where available staging have all been taken into account. act 2 in rb bc of link restrictions.

heaven on their minds - 2012 broadway revival

obviously in terms of pure vocals carl anderson is unbeatable forever, but the staging of the 2012 broadway revival pips it for me. josh young's voice is still gorgeous and the judas/jesus/mary throuple is everything. i love versions where hotm is sung directly To jesus, and i love that in this version jesus actually listen and takes judas' concerns on board. the love and respect between all three of them is palpable and even though it is a serious disagreement, part of that disagreement comes from the fact that they care about each other so much. that's tragedy baby!

special mention to henrike tönnes on the 2022 rob carroll version, i specifically like the Ending of the song for that one. also the sarcastic clap along w the disciples that judas does in the 2013 hungary version.

what's the buzz/ strange thing mystifying - 2018 tv event

annoyingly this isn't on youtube but tbh the staging is nothing mindblowing. i think what's the buzz is a great song for showcasing the usp of each version and in this one i think being able to hear the real crowd actually cheering for jesus (john legend) really adds to the narrative. i also absolutely love brandon victor dixon and as i have said before he would be one of my favourite judases if judas were straight. sara bareilles does a great 'offended' face when he bitches about her lmao.

honourable mention to the 2012 uk arena tour for again showing off the conceit of 'modern day activists' really well in this song, not forgetting of course WOTS THE BUZZ #buzz tweet

then we are decided - 2013 hungary

(starts at about 9:49) obviously not a huge amount of competition for this one, i wish more versions included it bc it's a great song :( anyway i loveee the staging choice to have everyone else freeze-framed on stage with the priests walking among them, and i freaking love this caiaphas. literally inserting it into what's the buzz also works nicely

i do miss kurt yaghjian from the 1973 film tho, forever obsessed with his voice and facial expressions. extra shout out to the striving artists version for simply existing.

everything's alright - 2006 austria

something about the musical direction in 90% of versions of this song goes right through me, like there is always some weird instrument that makes me Cringe. but this version is Nice :) really enjoy how Pissed this judas is. and i love the way the long notes last into the next section of the song. i will say i prefer the alt melody for 'people who are hungry' but you can't have everything

this is a really nice one on the all-female cast recording as well, obviously it's already the most female-heavy song of the show but shoshana bean's judas is particularly good here i think. also of course carl anderson with tears in his eyes grasping ted neely's hands while the music swells is ingrained on my brain for all time.

this jesus must die - 1994 studio cast

this album as a whole is probably my Least Favourite JCS Ever, but i will admit that this song fucks. the haunting eeriness at the beginning. the way it kicks into a funky little syncopated rhythm. the disembodied hosannas. unexpected delight.

2012 uk arena tour is unfortunately disqualified for having possibly the Most antisemitic portrayal of the priests, which is a shame because it's probably my favourite casting. one of my favourite annas portrayals, but in general all of them are distinct and fully embodied which does make that version very fun to watch. i also really enjoy the 2019 castaway productions version for this song, the way they play instruments while they sing like a lil band, and caiaphas' eye make-up is sick. 1973 film is obviously also iconic with the little scaffolding tippy taps, and the way kurt yaghjian sings 'a trick-or-two with lepers'. i love this song sorry.

hosanna - 2017 striving artists

i kind of don't have justification for this one LOL i just like it. i know there are versions that are sung better and really the staging is quite important for this song but idk i just find this version really calming. i don't know if it's the music direction? i don't know enough about music tbh

admittedly this is another one that works really well for the 2018 tv event, but doesn't quite win for me as the crowd don't cheer in all the right places and john legend doesn't react at all to the 'would you DIE for me?' line which is crucial. for good reaction to that line the 2000 film where it elevates the bitchy gay tension in the love triangle really nails it.

simon zealotes - 2011 austria

EASYYY WIN FOR ME this is actually the song that made me want to pick a best version for each one because this version IS so much better than any other one for me. the guitar!!!!!! rob's energy!! the music design for this one really fucks so severely and then there's just rob jumping around hyping up the crowd (there is a film version from 2008 on youtube, but i wanted to capture the music for this one). iconic.

big love also to hungary 2013 for having a simon who's in a wheelchair, particularly notable when it's really the highest energy role in the show. i do enjoy.

poor jerusalem - 2022 rob carroll

i cannot find any information about this album other than what's on spotify but i do enjoy the slight alt melodies in this version and i like his voice.

not a lot to go into for this song really. i like the ben forster version a lot as well, and the 1996 london cast version. 'close your eyes' is a better lyric than 'live a lie'. moving on.

pilate's dream - 2022 all-female cast

may be biased bc I LOVE ORFEH but i just think this version is so gorgeous. i love the little vocal drifts without going too overboard and distracting from the song. the music composition is especially pleasing as well.

there's a lot of honourable mentions i could give here bc i think pilate has so much potential for power and gravitas, but 1973 film, 2012 uk arena tour, 2013 hungary, and east end theatrical ensemble. are also big favs. in terms of staging i love the fact that 2019 castaway productions has jesus himself on stage playing the backing piano like he actually is haunting pilate.

the temple - 1992 australia

australia 1992 habitually has some of the most interesting and creative music direction and this is one of the songs where it particularly pays off. love the whistles. i also like that the second 'get out' is spoken, not screamed. the second half is appropriately creepy with the sustained 'chriiiist'. pretty boring staging but at least the costumes are fun.

i don't know how to love him - east end theatrical ensemble

possibly controversial choice but ugh i love this version i even love how low the sound quality is. like listening to a vinyl. i think her voice is so gorgeous and i love her accent. deeply soothing to listen to. i feel like im in the 70s rn.

i'm also a huge fan of the 1996 london cast recording, joanna ampil has such a sweet voice and the way she emotes so that you can really Hear it works well for this song. special shout out to 2012 uk arena tour which i don't think is a particularly amazing version but we get the absolute gunshow from mel c at the end so we love it.

damned for all time/blood money - 1973 film

CARL!! I feel like 1973 film and 1996 london album are at a disadvantage in this bc they're what i grew up with so i kind of take them for granted but this is undeniably iconic. no one can commit to the tortured soul but belief he's doing the right thing like him. the way he can scream but it still sounds Good. i prefer versions that have annas suggest 'a fee' rather than caiaphas just repeating himself so that's here too. the weird keening way he sings 'on thursday night'. annas dropping the coins just as he reaches for them. UGH so good. a lot less brassy than other versions as well.

this is another song that kinda fucks in every version, but the original 1970 album and the 2018 tv event are particularly good i think. also that one bit in 2012 uk arena tour where annas is like '...... get up off the floor.'

[night-market-if]

DEMO UPDATE SPOILERS

i reached the part where elias gives his grace to gabriel knowing he’ll succumb to his madness and die, and it hit me so hard, unexpectedly so. i started crying, i actually am crying as i’m typing this. the love that he has for gabriel.. more than his life.. it really is the true love of a parent.

i don’t want him to die i wish the night market could somehow locate another graceling before it’s too late or get stabbed again and somehow convert their life force into grace or just give their life force to them even if it’s just so elias and gabriel can life a little bit longer together i’m sobbing

and then the part where he replies “do you wish to have children?” after you thank him for his sacrifice. he’s saying so much with that simple question and his smile after the nm replies that they hadn’t thought about it. it broke me completely.

i’m still holding out feeble hope that elias will somehow overcome his madness yet. i don’t know how, and unlikely as it is, i guess i’d just like for them, elias and gabriel, to have a chance to nurture their relationship from it’s rocky grounds, reese included. more selfishly, i have grown fond of him and simply wish to see him live longer.

however, don’t let my wishful thinking sway your story in any way, please, if i may be presumptuous enough to believe it would. this is in no way a request or suggestion for the future plot. i leave the story and the characters’ fates to your brilliant mind. i am just along for the ride, feeling things just as you intended, hehe. i can’t wait to see what state the night market ends up in at the end of the journey.

happy writing and lots of love. :) <3

There has been so much discourse on Elias and somewhat on Reese lately and it brings me such joy. Because I have opposite reactions on them at times. Some people hate Elias. Others sympathize. Others are conflicted as hell. A point has even been made that you can have great relationships and do good things while being a bad person or vice versa. And the reason this brings me such joy is because I feel like I made a character that doesn't have a cut or dry answer depending on who you are. I like that depending on what you know, you have different feelings about Elias.

That all being said, I really really really want to write Elias and Reese's story of how they got to the Night Market. I really want to go into the question of his maddness. Is it innately him that is doing it or is it a true sickness? Where do we draw the line? But more importantly, I want to in Book 2, at least have Elias know that Reese is actually alive. And I wanted to have some sort of resolution between the strained relationship that Gabriel has with both of his fathers.

As a side note to readers, however. I get that our world is a dumpster fire right now. Especially given some of the political things that are going on. I get that we are all kind of in this teetering point upon a very high cliff. But, please do remember that this story is fantasy. That we are exploring characters and what makes people do certain things. Do not attack each other for differing POV's. I know that is kind of a Tumblr thing to do, stating that if you like xyz then you are "insert bad thing'. Let's not. This is a story. An escape. Not a real life issue. And let us all remember that things hit different for different people. That is not a reflection on anyone's morality. A well read person consumes a lot of different kinds of stories.

[spindaonateaspoon]

Since my perfect wonderful sexy patron is enabling my nonsense, let me introduce everyone to a deep point of discourse at all my family gatherings

Please feel free to defend your case in the replies. I want the notes looking like the Acropolis

[itsjaywalkers]

hi laurie <3 how is your health? do you feel better?

there’s another big discourse about regulus character, what is ooc for him, what is not, was he right, did he deserve redemption or did he deserve to die as villain. you know, same old conversation, but it made me curious about your vision of his character! how do you view him in canon? do you think he was more morally dark than grey or more grey than dark? tell me everything please <3

hi lovely!! my health's fine, i'm completely recovered!! it was a tough week but i survived that stupid chest infection

oooooh u know i don't care about discourse but i love how u just brought it up to . turn it into a nice lil debate and ask about my portrayal of a character <333

we obviously don't get a lot about reg in canon but i think we get enough!! a couple of what could be core traits (since what we learn of him is all from sirius pov who's . quite biased) and some of his backstory!! so yes, he's kind of a blank slate of a character, which is incredibly fun when it comes to fanfiction but also . i truly believe there's a foundation here, even if a tiny unstable one yk??

anyways, to me, regulus is quite morally grey, but i don't think . he's more dark or more grey . the lovely kat (@messrsage) wrote a very interesting post about this a while ago, they talked about how the black brothers are both morally grey, and that sirius isn't more good or regulus more bad. they move up and down the spectrum, depending on who they keep as friends, on what influences them and their environment. i think the word kat used was morally fluid?? or something along those lines. and i absolutely agree!!

i don't believe sirius was better or inherently good. i just think that they had different responses for the same trauma. that they surrounded themselves by very different kinds of ppl. neither of them is in the right or in the wrong, yk?? they're both victims!! regulus thought that . obeying and listening to their parents and doing what he was told was the best course of action and there's nothing wrong with that

sirius implies that reg wasn't . capable of thinking on his own . that he was 'soft enough to believe them' (referring to their parents) which has always made me think that . despite reg definitely believing in blood supremacy and all that bullshit, at least for a while, it wasn't because he rationalised the whole thing all by himself and thought it was True and Right and Genuine, but that walburga and orion said this was how the world worked and he didn't think of questioning it. sirius did and look where that got him, right?? and besides, those are his parents, and despite how strict and cruel they can be sometimes, they love him, regulus knows they do, so why would they lie. i think he was comfortable, in a way, in the life that his parents made for him, and if not fighting back and agreeing with everything also stopped the abuse then even better

it's like the death eater thing. i'm sure his family had a lot to do with it!! and sure, it was also implied that reg had this weird nerdy fixation with voldemort, but i don't think that means . he was bad . voldemort was such a powerful wizard, and his family, or at least part of it, supported him and chose to follow him, so why wouldn't he find him interesting?? or even worthy of admiration?? he ended up betraying him and sacrificing himself the moment he realised what voldemort actually intended to do. besides, he was a fucking kid. people tend to forget that he was literally 16 when he joined the death eaters. and idk about u, but i was a fucking idiot at 16. not awful or anything, ofc, but i still did and said a lot of shit i'm not proud of, simply bc i didn't know better. but the thing is that i wasn't expected to!! bc again, i was just a kid!! doesn't excuse any of my mistakes, but i do think it's a fact that u gotta take into account when u try to judge someone

i think regulus wasn't a hero, but he wasn't a villain either. i think he was a terrified boy trying to survive. trying to make his family proud. and by the time he finally realised his mistake, it was too late. he still tried to fix his shit, and i think that matters. does that make him a good person?? nah, not really. but i think it makes him human

on a more surface level, my regulus is . proud . stubborn . spoiled . posh . mean in a non-targeted way, it's never personal to him (or not usually) and he's not trying to hurt anyone, it's just . a defence mechanism?? part of his personality, in a way. he isn't trying to be cruel on purpose. i think he's also a curious person, but it's a part of him he tends to ignore or supress, bc his parents don't like it. i think he's a follower and that he hates being the centre of attention, but at the same time, he's jealous of the way sirius seems to have everyone's eyes on him when he enters a room. he can be petty and resentful, but he's also shy and quiet and so very soft. it's a side of him that not a lot of ppl get to see, bc it's weak, but it's very much there, and i think that's the regulus that sirius knew most of his life. the regulus that he knew (or at least wanted to believe) was still there, which probably make him speak of him in such a . gentle way?? like yes, he called him an idiot but he has no qualms about cursing the rest of his family out, and he's pretty mean to all of them (with good reason) except andromeda and regulus. to me, that means he still loved his brother, and if sirius is still capable of . caring about regulus, at least to a certain degree, without even knowing about his change of heart . well . he couldn't have been that awful

there's also quite the debate about the kreacher thing, and whether reg was actually kind-hearted enough to believe and defend elves' rights or if it was simply the fact that it was kreacher, his house elf, and nothing else. personally, i don't think it matters that much. whatever his reason was, he still decided to betray voldermort over it, and tried to do the right thing, even tho the risk was High and he didn't know if he'd make it. that's what i believe says more about his character than what his exact tipping point was

and god i'm gonna shut up now, this turned out to be so ridiculously long i just . find regulus so interesting SORRY NONNIE😭

[aemiron-main]

you. yes you. unless you read this and go “oh yeah em definitely doesnt mean me” in which case hello james and bre and stav and any other beloveds who touch grass on the regular but i did not list you by name because i do not want to drag you into my shitposting hell (james bre and stav are already at fatal levels of em shitposting exposure so sorry guys) 👋. anyway you. yes you. Go touch grass. Log off (affectionate but also maybe derogatory, depends on whether you get off on me hating you or not, whatever floats ur boat)

And you might be thinking “oh but em you are a Hypocrite here you are posting online telling people to long off?? 🤨🤨🤨😔” to which i say yes and i have undergone surgery to permanently fuse the neurons in my brain to the byler tag, so i actually can’t log off!! Check your ableism please.

So this is actually a grim and gory plea for you guys to log off because my neurons simply cannot handle the number of dramatic, self-victimizing posts and as someone who also hypocritically takes his analysis very seriously, i think sometimes you guys take things Too Seriously.

However do not mistake this for a spineless “please stop fighting 🥺🥺🥺” post because to be clear i am not a middle school aged girl and you are not my alpha wolfpack jock boyfriend with anger issues who i act like im taming a wild horse in a lifetime movie when i try and get to calm down and tell you to “dont fight, jason, just look at me, focus on me, it’s not worth it 🥺🥺” and instead take this as a grim warning from a guy who is having a silly little blast making silly little posts about the discourse but who also has his neurons linked directly to the internet so he feels the full force of every single post and cannot escape and who does not want you to face the same fate simply because i want to be the special boy who is inextricably and horrifyingly linked to the web. This plea to log off is not for your own good but rather for the good of my superiority complex and need to feel unique hope that helps. 🙏

and just remember to drink water and eat food and take breaks 🥺🙏💗😽🌈💦💦💦 or don’t! if you don’t eat or drink then that means youll die and i’ll soon have more bodies for my Corpse Army so actually NO eating NO drinking and that is an ORDER!!!!

[valyrfia]

https://www.tumblr.com/valyrfia/753339300734812160/guys-if-i-reblog-a-post-to-add-an

honestly going to sound bitchy when I say this, and while I don’t think OP should be getting hate for their takes, I also think it’s unrealistic to expect something that’s posting on a public forum to never break containment. Especially when their takes either make them sound like a hypocrite or like they honestly believe that any ships are happening IRL and not just a bit of fun within the fandom.

I personally don’t give a shit if someone finds my takes on Lestappen delusional, because let’s be real-it is. The same way all RPF is, no matter the ship. Because we don’t know these people. So I find it hard to judge others for their shipping because at the end of the day you’ve got to take a step back and realize this is all for fun, if we’re reading too much into an interaction, so what? If we’re pook-afing a grown man, what’s the hard? There’s a difference between RPF/shipping and the actual person going out to race every weekend. And personally, I’m more concerned with people that have trouble understanding and distinguishing between the two.

There is probably a less than 1% chance that Charles and Max are interested in each other in a romantic way, which is why all of my “theories” are simply for fun. And I can understand not wanting to interact with some of the more die hard fans, for any ship/fandom because they do tend to get a little too defensive of their favs. But I’m not okay with the suggestion that, Lestappen is somehow less morally okay than Carlando or Galex or whatever other ship because we’re Ken-afing a man. As if we any of the other ships are somehow more realistic.

Eh idk. I think we're all on tumblr to escape something and enjoy, and people have different boundaries to keep their peace that deserve to be respected. Just because someone criticises a certain ship and then requests that their opinion not be spread because they just don't have the mood nor the energy to discuss it doesn't make them a hypocrite, it just means they want to log on and enjoy what they enjoy without having to engage too critically with it. I don't think OP was saying that Lestappen is less morally okay (let's get one thing straight: all RPF is morally grey as hell but that's a different discussion), rather sharing their opinion of the ship as formed by their experiences–as I think they're entitled to do. OP didn't post it in any tags, and it only reached us because people sent it in.

Yeah I disagreed with their take, and expressed that and I stand by my points–but I have deleted and will delete my takes if it means sending discourse anons to a person who doesn't want it. I explicitly asked at the beginning of my reblog of thearchercore's original anon not to go send anons to OP because they set a boundary in their meta that they didn't want them, so it's just a bit annoying that then anons flood this person's inbox anyway and I get contacted and my username gets attached to all this disrespect and boundary breaking and I'm the one who has to apologise and I feel a little mortified. Just please respect people's boundaries, it makes everyone's lives much simpler.