#no seriously i am a big ass emotional baby

[generallyconfusedbyshinythings]

So, um... I wrote a Daniel Molloy poem from Armand's pov. 🙈🙈

"winter of my love"

~~

white hair

is the ice cold snow

of december trapped —

trying to escape

the breath of the sun

blue eyes

are the depths

of the everlasting ocean

swimming behind your eyes

never escaping my soul

for you are —

the winter of my love

©S.J.

[saetoru]

Tee 🥹 so RB Gojo always shows up to YNs house unexpectedly or wants her to come over. What if one day out of the blue, like 2 am she shows up at his house in tears due to stress. And for once he can be the caretaker and dependable one. And then she falls asleep in his arms arms and he gets to be the big spoon for once. I could see her whispering “you’re it for me too” while thinking he’s asleep.- dabitee anon

✩ ‧₊˚ ✩。BEFORE & AFTER — GOJO SATORU. (rich boy! au)

contents. college au, rich boy! gojo, stressed reader :(, comfort, cheesy banter lol i tried ok, slightly based off of this drabble

notes. dabitee anon. babie u are my biggest rb! gojo inspo u always think of the sweetest lil moments between them sobsss i adore you sm

sometimes, gojo forgets you're not always put together. sometimes, you struggle to get assignments finished, and sometimes you don't wake up for work on the first alarm, and sometimes studying is too much to handle no matter how determined you are for an A.

"thinking about me this late, sweetheart?" he grins as soon as he picks up your call, laying back on one arm as he stares at the ceiling. he doesn't expect to see you call at two am, but you do—and when he hears the short, wet sniffle through the phone, he doesn't waste a moment to sit up. "sweetheart? you good?"

"toru can you let me in?" you ask quietly. gojo feels every crack in your voice pierce into his chest—it's rare for you to need him like this. he thinks he's always needed you more than you've needed him, truthfully. you've always opened doors after he's stormed out on his father, you've always laced your fingers after arguments with suguru, and you've always rubbed his back when he's hunched over toilets after one too many drinks.

when was the last time you've let yourself need gojo? he doesn't have the time to even try and remember, his feet carrying him over to open his front door quietly. and it's you—you with teary eyes and puffy cheeks, you with tired dark circles and wobbly lips. it's you, but it's not the you he knows, the one he's used to.

the one good thing about gojo satoru is he always knows how to talk—he speaks enough for two, knows how to fill the silence when you can't bring yourself to speak. his arms tug you into his chest before you can open your mouth to explain.

"did you drive all the way here with those watery eyes?" he hums, "wanted to see me that bad? it's dangerous driving like that, baby."

"didn't wanna be alone," you mumble, sniffling into his chest. his hands are big—they're good for rubbing slow circles into your back, the warmth of his palm seeping in through your shirt and pressing against your skin.

"i'd have come if you texted me," he hums, "'m always up, anyway. you know i was beating suguru's ass in mortal combat? he owes me a burger."

"you can afford one yourself, idiot," you huff, making him chuckle. something about the low rumble of his chest against your cheek makes the tears flow a little faster—not because you feel worse, but because it's safe enough that you can.

sometimes, you forget gojo isn't that spoiled and whiny handful you love to call him. sometimes, you're reminded that he's used to being alone, that carrying emotions enough for two is his forte. your cheek presses harder against his chest, like you could bury yourself inside of him like that, like hiding away in his ribcage is where you're safest from the rest of the world. maybe it is—maybe all you need is him to make it safe.

"who's got my baby crying the night before an 8 am class?" he asks softly, “i’ll punch ‘em.”

“what if i say you, will you punch yourself?”

“for you, always,” he nods seriously.

he knows how to ask these things like that: like it's not heavy, like you can make a light-hearted joke or two so that you're not drowning in your own vulnerability. sometimes, you forget that gojo is no stranger to hiding his own vulnerability, that he knows how to hide it under a playful grin and a cheeky laugh.

"that group assignment's due soon and no one's done anything yet but me, and i had to pick up an extra shift to cover for someone, and that quiz coming up is apparently super hard, and my electricity bill was high this month and i don't know why, and....and—"

"okay," he hums, "the electricity might've been me," he says with a quiet chuckle, "i always forget to turn the lights off. I'll handle it, yeah?"

"but—"

"it's not paying for you," he cuts you off, "it's paying you back. there's a difference. now c'mon. i make good hot chocolate."

"it's out of a packet," you sniffle, lips curled into a pout as his thumb swipes away at your tears. he traces the swell of your cheek before pinching it lightly, making you huff.

"hey," he gasps, "it's special because i put extra chocolate in it! it's my secret ingredient."

"it's not a secret if it's the main ingredient, toru," you mumble, letting his fingers thread with yours as he tugs you along to follow him.

"do you just live to correct me?" he whines, "can't i have one thing?"

and when he hears that soft, breathy little giggle from you, he smiles to himself, the ache of his chest calming just a little. you think gojo could always do that if he tried—pull a small laugh or two out of you even if the world was crumbling around you, keep your lips curved up even as everything goes wrong.

he's enough to forget about that damn project, and that extra shift, and that absurd quiz, and that distressing bill. maybe it's in the way he makes the whipped cream look like a crooked heart in your mug, or the way he burns his tongue as he takes a sip too fast, or the way he swings your arm as he drags you to his room, or the way he wriggles his brows at you as he takes his shirt off before bed, or the way he presses that delicate, sweet, careful little kiss to your forehead as you lay on his chest.

because he has to be enough, he thinks as he holds you, he has to be good enough for you that he outweighs every bad thing you'll ever deal with. he wonders if you know you're it for him, if you know that no one else could fill the spot you've wormed your way into unknowingly. he realizes it that night you hold him, the same night you didn't scold him for ruining your sleep, the same night he finds his way to you when it feels like every road is blocked.

and when the roads are blocked you find your way to him too. so he lays quietly under your cheek, feeling your fingers trace those slow hearts into his skin as he hears you murmur, "i think you're it for me too, toru."

his brows furrow—and then he realizes you must have heard him that night, just like he's hearing you now. a small part of him wants to laugh at the odds, at the way you both can't bring yourselves to say it when you're sure you'll hear each other. the other part of him thinks maybe you were always supposed to find each other, that you were always meant to stay awake and hear hushed words that are supposed to be secrets.

but then you tilt your head up, meeting his eyes, like you know he's awake. oh, he realizes, you've always known, haven't you?

"oh yeah?" he asks, "what if someone cuter and funnier comes along?"

you giggle—not one trace of stress or fear or defeat on your features, not with him there. "i met suguru and still chose you," you tease, making his gasp in disbelief.

"that's so mean," he whines, "i made you hot chocolate with extra chocolate! you can't say my best friend is cuter. and for the record, i'm way funnier than him."

"i'm kidding," you grin, pinching his cheek. "i love you. thank you," you add quietly.

"love you too," he kisses your temple. sometimes, gojo forgets what it was like before you—and he doesn't really want to remember.

atp rich boy! gojo is just his own character to me sjfjsjfj i’ve just created a whole new dude in my head with the same irritating blue eyes

[imababblekat]

Pushing Buttons

Anon Request, “ Love your content it’s sooo cute! Can I get a snarky sarcastic reader who calls April for a chat on speaker phone then gets into a funny argument with Ralph trading jabs. Like he tries to get April to hang up because their in the middle of something important but reader gives him a snappy comeback. They keep going with everyone listening. Tired of this April is gonna hang up on them but before that happens “Wait wait! give that guys digits he sounds hot! You know how I love pushing a guys buttons!”

A/N: I hope this is okay, gonna be honest I struggled to write this one for some reason. Hope it’s still at the very least readable \TvT/

~xXx~

April hadn’t meant to answer the phone, but Mikey curiously nudging into her had caused her to ultimately accept your request. As if to make a point at your horrible timing as April and the boys were in the mist of a game plan to take down a new gang, you’re voice rang loud through the speaker causing everyone to simultaneously jump.

“Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh!! April you are not going to believe what happened to me at work today!!”

April sighed, giving the ninja turtles apologetic glances. 

“I can’t really talk right-”

“I’ll make it quick! I swear! Okay, so I got up at seven like I usually do, right? I was really tired though, so I went to snooze my alarm and-”

Before April could politely ask you to skip ahead to what had happened at your job, the human girl was thrown for a shock when Raphael had suddenly snatched the device straight out of her hand. She went to reprimand him but all he had done was hold a large hand up to block her as he angrily snapped into the call.

“She’s busy. Call back later.”

*click*

April’s eyes had never been as wide as they were in that moment. No way did Raphael just hang up on you of all people. Said terrapin, with a triumphant grin, reached out to hand her back the phone, when it had suddenly started going off again right in his palm. If it weren’t for the growing agitation, he could have sworn it seemed to vibrate with a vengeance. With a hard tap, he answered the call ready to repeat what he had done only a few minutes ago.

“I said-”

“Excuse me!!”

Raphael felt himself fumble at your sudden shout, April standing across from him with a knowing look.

“And who the hell do you think you are, huh?! You do not cut me off when I am talking to my gal pal!!”

Raphael sputtered, caught off for but a second before snapping back.

“Who do I-?! April’s busy! I’m sure whatever little issue you got goin on at work ain’t that important!”

“Oh, and how would you know that?! You read minds huh?! I’d ask if you’re some sort of phycologist but frankly just from your voice alone I’d say you’re need of one.”

“What is that supposed to mean?!”

“I think you know what I mean, big boy.”

Raphael felt his blood boiling in that moment, his brothers Mikey and Donnie doing their best to stifle their laughter behind him while Leo simply smirked at his dismay. All the while all April could do was hide her face in her hands at the embarrassment she felt for her close friend on the line.

“Don’t call me that.”

“What? Would you rather I call you big baby instead? Ya gonna cry about it? Good, cuz sounds to me like you need to shed a few tears. It’s perfectly healthy by the way. Just thought I’d let you know that since you give off the vibe that you’d rather walk around with a stick up your ass then express your emotions.”

“A stick up my ass?! Seriously?! How about I come over and shove one up yours?! You’re just all bark and no bite!”

“Ooo, don’t promise me with a good time~.”

If it were possible, Raph’s face would match the color of his mask at your raunchy response, the suave to your tone not making things any better. It was at the sudden burst of laughter behind him from his brothers and Aprils own snickering that the brute decided in that moment the best course of action was to, once again, hang up the damn phone. 

A groan bubbled up from his throat at he tossed April back her phone, sending a glare to his still cackling siblings. 

“Will ya all stop laughin. Let’s just get back to the stupid plan.”, he glared, arms crossing.

It was Leo, who had to take a few breaths to gather himself, that brought back the others to focus.

“Okay, okay, you heard the big boy. Let’s ready up.”

Green eyes glared daggers at the leader in blue for his jab, the other winking back with a shit eating grin. Raphael stepped forward to make a quip in response to Leo, when a chortle behind him had alerted all the turtles. It was from April, who’s eyes crinkled in the corners as she did her best to bite back some giggles, holding up her phone to show what had caused such a reaction out of her. Each brother leaned in, squinting at the small text on screen and then let out more laughter, Mikey rocking a groaning Raph’s shoulders with congratulations.

On the screen before them, read a text sent by the very person who riled him up quicker then anyone on record.

*Hey girly, you gotta get me your friends digits! Dude sounds hot af 😉💗*

~xXx~

[austinsastrology8991]

> SUN IN THA HOUSE < and whY yoU Be like dat

Sun is our focal point, its our brightest star > you force others to look at you and look at themselves by your star quality <

Sun in the First - Everyone knows them, and they make it a fact that if you don't see them then your the one who is blind. They have a confident swagger, but arrogance to them that begs for the attention of all around them, and everyone is locked in on how or why they have such a powerful presence. Their smiles are contagious too. Also somehow always in the perfect place to say some funny ass shit and keep their style points that they been racking up over the years "You know. You all know exactly who I am. Say my name" - W.W 'breaking bad'

Sun in the Second - Did I stutter? Im talking about what I need not what I want. These guys are possessed by themselves and everyone loves it. So focused so self contained, they don't want nothing to do with you if you can't help them achieve their goals, and that attitude is sticky and everyone wanna be glued to em because they are destined for success. So they are constantly deciding who they want to share their gifts with, because they know they got it, what you got? "Money, money, money, money, money ain't the motive, What's your name again? Nobody knows it, Don't speak to me n***a, you not important, Im focused" - Tyler, the creator 'smuckers'

Sun in the Third - The whizz kid who didn't study, but stole the test papers and told everyone the wrong answers and kept all the right ones to himself. They are smart and they dont need you to tell them this they just want some more god damn answers. And thats what frustrates everyone, because they know so much already, why they still searching? Well thats how they got so smart dummy "That's why they put my lyrics up under this microscope Searching with a fine tooth comb, it's like this rope Waiting to choke, tightening around my throat Watching me while I write this, like, "I don't like this note" - Eminem 'white america'

Sun in the Fourth - The sentimental cry baby that everyone loves to cuddle. Emotional but people find it adorable. They are the rock you can cry on if you want a rock to cry on. Nah but if you need a safe place to cry, you can cry to them, they'll protect you from the harsh waves of others emotional projections, because they get it, even when everyone else refuses to. But don't use em because that'll force them to block you out, and this decision will cause a emotional rollercoaster for the both of you and they'll blame you for it even if it was their decision "And I am done changing words, Just so my songs sound prettier, I just don't care if it hurts, 'Cause it hurts me too" - Faye Webster 'hurts me too'

Sun in the Fifth - The walking confetti explosion, always turnt up and if you trynna lower the volume then they'll oblige ya just so when the volume inevitably goes up again, they'll make it a point that its always more fun with the party up then down. Charming chameleons that are cheesin about the colours they managed to pull off. Watch em dance, watch em sing, watch em do a funny, they can do it all and laugh while doing it, the vibe is them and they are so good at inviting people in on the little big party they got going on "Man I just wanna go flex, Gold on my teeth and on my neck, And I'm stone cold with the flex, With my squad and I'm smokin' up a check" - Post Malone 'go flex'

Sun in the Sixth - Typeracer.com - nah but seriously they always working on themselves and comparing themselves just to make sure their progress is more than what they expected and way more than what others expected of them. Because they here for a reason, and they will never let a opportunity slip, because if they do, they'll stay awake over it for years, and they done wasting their good years. Basically Peggy Olsen "And when your album sales wasn't doing too good, Who's the Doctor they told you to go see? Y'all better listen up closely, All you n***s that said that I turned pop, Or The Firm flopped. Y'all are the reason that Dre ain't been getting no sleep" - Dr Dre 'forgot about dre'

Sun in the Seventh - I gotchu what you need? true homies always putting others before them, and i know this gets a bad rap these days but if you ever get one of these friends. Do yourself a favour and stop telling them to stand up for themselves, because they still standing with the weight of everyone else on they shoulders. This way they show others the power of communication. And they still sticking it to everyone who tell em otherwise, so please tell me how they not standing up for themselves? They the loyalist, you got no idea how many people rely on em and thats their pride "Every step I take, every move I make (ohh, I'll miss you), Every single day, every time I pray, I'll be missing you (yeah, yeah, yeah), Thinkin' of the day, when you went away, What a life to take, what a bond to break, I'll be missing you" - Diddy 'missing you'

Sun in the Eighth - Who went to hell and back? Well they went to a version of it. And they are done hearing whatever you done, because what they did beats your hell tenfold. They don't even wanna put you in your place because they don't wanna hear your attempts to disapprove of them because they've overcome more than some bullshit shit talking. Just put some respect on their name thats all they want. And if not it's easy pickens because think they worse than you, and if you done worse, they don't mind going badder, so be careful, they'll do it. They careful about not being careful so be careful "No I don't worry, I tell you, I'm a man who believes that I died twenty years ago, And I live like a man who is dead already, I have no fear whatsoever of anybody or anything" - Skepta 'no security'

Sun in the Ninth - I WOKE UP IN NEW BUGgATTI is how they live their lives, except miss the bugatti but keep the caps lock on. They live by a set of moral philosophies to help them get by and to find excitement/ enjoyment outta life, because they refuse to be a follower, they've seen how sad everyone else is and they just trynna make sure it don't work out that way for them. Educated idiots; making up the rules as they learn the rules to live by their own rules. They lead their own life and it rubs off on everyone on how you should live your own life > teetering the edge of danger and fortune. Also someone who'll give it to you the realest despite being the biggest clown "Black kid get shot, white man get tazed, Media spread lies, politicians get paid, Doctors wanna drug you up so you can reach an early grave, Prisons wanna lock you up so they can fill up every cage Make fifty cents an hour, they gon' work you like a slave, Government gon' play dumb but they know everythin' " - Meechy Darko 'kill us all'

Sun in the Tenth - "Who speaking about me? oh. he ain't shit" - they acting better than everyone, and its fake until it isnt. No one knows when they made it because they always acted like they did. They dont brag they let the audience speak their volumes, hum their symphonies, play their drums, tickle their balls, and they just the orchestrator of it all. Because they doin the most, and they know everyone gonna talk about it so no need to even speak on it. Classy about it too. They on the top and they don't wanna leave so they acting humble but everyone know they really feelin themselves, but hey who wouldn't "I might be too strung out on compliments, Overdosed on confidence, Started not to give a fuck and stopped fearing the consequence, Drinkin' every night because we drink to my accomplishments" - Drake 'headlights'

Sun in the Eleventh - Trend setters who leave their shit stains on every social setting they enter. They got this influence about them thats hard not to notice, because they have at least three people fawning over em, and they not doing shit. Always trying to spread their influence, so if you want someone to back you its them, because their word is worth more due to their connections. And the easiest way to connect is technology and they all up in the software and getting a hard drive about it. They say some outta pocket shit, but thats where the influenza comes from I guess. They somehow everywhere and no where at the same damn time "It's ironic you talk jail time, But you ain't never seen no central booking (yeah) It's ironic you hang with a n***a that beat women And have the nerve to call yourself "Girl Pusher" Wow! You ain't real, I'm gonna show you how I really feel - JPEGMAFIA 'baby im bleeding'

Sun in the Twelfth - Lonely introspective dreamy creative types. Is what you could say if you wanna sum them up. But there is much more to them, but they are so afraid of letting anyone in because they are so sensitive. Their empathy and ability to look at things from different perspectives is what sets them apart, and they want to be set apart, because they feel alone, and don't wanna pretend they your friend if they ain't. They are extremely creative to a fault, and a lot of people would rather make fun of their works then celebrate how special it is. Until it is widely acknowledged how gifted they are, then everyone will switch up around them. But they will never forget who said what, because they above the whats; aint got time for someone who thought they were just a what "'Cause I'm out there, Tried to tell you that I'm out here on my own, I told you I was out there, Tried to tell you that I'm out here on my own,I fell down to Earth, From a hundred miles away and somehow I still make it work, But it's overrated and somehow played out" - Oliver Tree 'alien boy'

[bring-forth-his-sac]

Thank you sm (I’m the anon who sent the ask) 🥹 & wow I’m so shocked you’ve only wrote a couple drabbles/imagines because it was honestly so well written! I saw a prompt on pinterest for “you make me proud, you know that right?” & it’s where the reader/character is pregnant & negan is just all soft & proud of her if that makes sense 🥹 if you don’t wanna write this topic it’s all good don’t worry!!! 🫶🏻

thank you so much for the request!! I hope you enjoy <3

Summary: Negan realises you’re insecure about becoming a parent and gives you some much needed reassurance 

Pairing: Negan x Pregnant!Reader 

Tags: Pregnancy symptoms, insecurity, lewd and suggestive language, swearing, fluff, Negan being a big ol’ softie, pet names, praise and reassurance 

Word Count: 2k

You don’t know it, and that baffles Negan.

He knows you don’t know. He can see it in those little moments when you don’t think anyone is paying attention.

At this point, Negan is acutely attuned to all of your tells. He sees the emotional tug-of-war within you every morning when you study the new changes to your body. Usually Negan pays subtle attention whenever he sees you looking in the mirror, making a mental note of what body part to praise more during your next session under the sheets.

He sees the sparkle of humour in your eyes as you announce that you, yet again, for about the sixth time, need to go pee because the baby keeps kicking near your bladder.

Negan absolutely loves to see that pouty look of determination you have plastered across your face whenever he tries to help you complete a simple chore. Despite the slow waddling and frequent breaks you need, you’ve been hellbent on still helping out while pregnant. 

Negan appreciates your refusal to shy away from the more "risky" household tasks, like climbing up on a step ladder to paint the higher parts of the wall in the baby’s nursery. Although he didn’t mind being the one to hold the ladder, it just meant he got to stare at your ass while silently praying you don't fall— a win-win situation, if you ask him.

And yet, you still don’t know. Or maybe you just don’t realise it.

He always picks up on that insecure tone of yours. It usually creeps out every now and again but it has been rearing it’s ugly head more often since the pregnancy. If it wasn’t so concerning, it would amaze Negan that you seriously don’t know how good of a mother you’ll be, or how amazing you’re taking on this pregnancy.

Negan sighs, stretching out on the couch as he reminisces. Only a couple of more months from now and he’ll be looking back on the days he didn’t have to burp a baby and stay up half the night cooing at them. 

As he contemplates the sleepless nights and endless cries ahead, Negan can't help but feel a surge of excitement. He's well aware that in those moments, when he's exhausted and cleaning up baby vomit at 4:30 am, he won't necessarily feel thrilled, but goddammit he just can’t wait to meet the little shit!

He snaps out of his thoughts as you emerge from the bedroom, huffing to yourself. “Looking for something, Momma?” Negan teases affectionately, a lazy grin on his face.

“I forgot shoes,” you announce more to yourself than to him.

“Hmm?” Negan hums, not exactly sure he heard you correctly.

“The shoes,” you reiterate “I never got shoes!”. 

Negan struggles to suppress a laugh at how seriously you’re talking about shoes. He’s well acquainted with how up and down your emotions have been since getting pregnant and so he’s trying his best to be more mindful.

“Sweetness, what shoes?” he asks, keeping his tone soft “we got plenty of shoes just laying around the place”.

The second you leave out another sigh, Negan opens his arms to you, silently inviting you to join him. You waste no time in padding over, practically collapsing into his embrace. “I meant shoes for the baby,” you clarify with a frown “we managed to find clothes, socks, bibs but I forgot about shoes! We can’t have the baby going around without shoes on!”.

It takes a moment for Negan to register your words before he slowly replies “I don’t think newborns do much walking”.

Leaving out yet another exasperated sigh, you lift your legs up, lounging on the couch and using Negan as your pillow. “I know the baby won’t be running around the place straight away but...” you pause, silently scowling at yourself “they’re shoes! How the fuck could I forget shoes?! Like, everyone has shoes! So the baby needs shoes too!”.

Negan peers down at you, trying his best to take in your cranky expression. For a moment, he wonders if it's direct towards him for not thinking of shoes either but then you mumble “I can’t fuck up the basic shit like this…”.

And just like that, everything clicks into place for Negan.

Despite his shock at hearing it, there’s no denying the insecurity in your tone. Even though he knew you were nervous about the baby coming, he didn’t think you’d actually beat yourself up over the little things like shoes – how could you? With the amazing things your body is doing, who gives a fuck about shoes?! …Besides you, that is.

Nevertheless, the vulnerability in your voice catches him off guard. Shifting to hold you properly on the couch, Negan’s arms wrap around you, his hands going straight for your bump. You instinctively snuggle against him, your back against his chest as you rest your head by his shoulder and mindlessly trace patterns on his forearm. 

“You ever just stop and think about it?” he asks, his voice oddly dreamy, a tone you don’t normally hear from him.

“About what?” you ask, growing warm in his embrace. 

“Your body took the spunk I fucked into you and you’re making a goddamn baby out of it! I mean, right now, this very second you’re making a mini us out of nothing but your egg and my jizz!” he laughs in pure disbelief, feeling his heart melt at his own words as pride takes over.

You try not to wince at his colourful description of conception.

With a wide grin, Negan continues “Here you are, cuddling up on me as if you’re body ain’t growing through hell. You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for, Darlin’. Carrying life that we’re after making… you’re a goddamn badass”.

“I’ll make sure to give myself some credit the next time I forget about getting shoes… or some other basic thing for the baby” you sulk, showing off that stubborn quality of yours he loves so much.

He shakes his head affectionately, straining forward to try and see your face. “Hon, you’ve got a lot going on right now, and you’re dealing with a lot of new, stressful stuff,” Negan tries to put your mind at ease “It’s totally reasonable that you’d forget some things. And so what if the baby doesn’t have shoes straight away, it ain’t like they’re going anywhere. It’s not gonna make you a bad mother, you gotta stop thinking that way”.

You chew on your bottom lip for a moment before you slowly begin to open up ”But if I can't even get the little things right, like the shoes, then I’m bound to mess up the bigger things too! And I can’t do that, especially when the baby arrives".

As you speak, you feel yourself that familiar sense of insecurity flare up. You tilt your head up and your eyes look up to meet his gaze, searching for reassurance.

Negan exhales, a content smile tugging at the corner of his lips despite your worrisome expression. After all, how can he not smile while he has you in his arms, pregnant with his baby? His own happy little family, despite everything he has done in life. Now all he wishes for is for you to see just how damn perfect you are, how perfect you have made his life. 

“Darlin’, you’re gonna get stressed and forget things, and fuck up every once in a while. That’s how parenting is. Nobody is a perfect parent. We’re both gonna have our moments and that’s a-ok” he explains, bringing one hand away from your bump to gently cup your face, subtly making sure you keep looking at him “you know why I’m so relaxed about it all?”.

“Because you’re not the one carrying the baby? Or dealing with morning sickness? Or because you won’t have to push out a literal child in a few months?”.

He gives you a quick deadpan look, managing to keep it playful before he reverts back to sincerity “I’m relaxed because I know that even when I’m dealing with a baby that’ll be drooling all over me or screeching in my face in the middle of the night, I know you’ll be right next to me, and that’s all I need”.

His gaze remains fixed on you, drinking in your features intently as he holds your face. For a second, Negan gets lost in thought and silently wishes the baby will have your nose.

“You make me proud, you know that, right?” he strokes his thumb across your cheek “so, so goddamn proud”.

You can't help but smile bashfully in response, feeling a bit self-conscious. In a sweet attempt to hide your expression, you pull your face away from Negan’s hand and nestle yourself closer to him, concealing your face. Accepting compliments has never been your strong suit.

“C’mon, don’t go hiding on me now,” he chuckles, gently searching for your face  “I wanna hear you say it, to make sure you know”. 

Defiantly turning to your side, you use both the couch and Negan’s own arm as a shield to keep your face hidden. He grins, amused by your attempt at avoiding his words. He pokes your side, his voice a mix of teasing and affection.

"You know you make me proud, right?" he repeats with a hint of playfulness in his tone, as if trying to coax you into admitting it “riiiiiiiiiiiiiight?”

Negan doesn't show any mercy, transitioning from playful pokes to relentless tickling. Your body trembles as laughter escapes your lips, struggling to shield vulnerable ticklish spots while simultaneously attempting to fend off his hands. Your head perks up again, a light blush on your cheeks; whether it’s from the sudden tickle attack or Negan’s praise is anyone’s guess.

Between bouts of laughter, you manage to get out a word, struggling to speak through the giggles "R-right!". 

Negan beams, happy you agree. Before you can think, he takes advantage of your unguarded face to plant a quick, chaste kiss on your lips - as if the tickling didn’t leave you breathless already.

Negan's voice becomes a sultry purr as he whispers "How about I show you just how proud I am of you? Actions do speak louder than words and all that shit...". His warm breath caresses your skin as he speaks, his intentions alone sending a shiver down your spine.

A pleased hum escapes your lips, already liking the sound of this. “Works for me,” you agree, biting back a smile as you stand.

Before your pregnancy and even in the early stages, you didn't mind ‘doing it’ anywhere, but now that you've reached the second trimester, the comfort of the bed has become more appealing. Negan has never been particular about where y’all get freaky either way, although he does like how you can both comfortably cuddle afterwards if you do it on the bed.

As soon as Negan stands, he gently checks to make sure you're steady on your feet. When you both begin walking towards the bedroom, you suddenly change direction. 

Negan's expression morphs into confusion as you abruptly pivot and walk towards the bathroom. Looking back over your shoulder, you try not to swoon at the endearingly baffled expression on his face. “Just give me a second, with you tickling me and the baby bouncing on my bladder, I need to pee again” you shrug, waddling off to the bathroom.

As the sound of the bathroom door closing reaches his ears, Negan can't help but chuckle affectionately. In the meantime, he strolls into the bedroom and plops himself down on the bed, making himself comfortable as he waits for your return. His gaze fixates on the ceiling above as a smile plays on his lips once more, a warm feeling of anticipation stirring within him.

Sometimes, Negan finds himself wondering if all the hardships and disappointments he's endured in life were necessary because they were all part of some cosmic plan that led him to you. Or at least that’s what he tells himself so all that pain feels like it was worth it because it brought him to you. 

Negan isn’t exactly sure how he did it or what he did to deserve all of this luck, but goddamn he struck gold having you in his life.

And he knows that for certain.

[matan4il]

911 ep 705 first watch reactions

Of course 911 would "punish" the "You are the boss of you!" guy with an alien hand that attacks him, and does what it wants. Pooor Buck and Eddie paying the price for that...

Okay, love the storyline with Hen and Karen possibly eventually adopting an older girl. Too many shows just find easy, unrealistic ways to give their same sex couples kids, and I am really glad that 911 shows the reality of it, and that it is a more complex struggle for many, that it's an act of continuously choosing to be parents. That's actually an amazing, difficult thing, and it should be faithfully depicted and respected, for all of its heartache, and the little moments of triumph.

Buck and Tommy on a date, and Eddie comes along with Marisol? Love how Buck's bisexual awakening and coming out continues to involve Eddie so much. Tell me they're end game, even if they're not gonna get together right now, without telling me they're...

I did not need to learn Marisol is moving in with Eddie like this, with any build up, or even any sort of insight into the relationship, and nope, that does not bode well for them. IDK how 911 managed to do it, but they have somehow managed to give Eddie a love interest the show is even less invested in than Ana.

And the funniest bit, is that Marisol and Eddie's big development is only there to further Buck's journey anyway.

"You can never have too much closet space" LMAO the way 911 both made me laugh, and feel sorry for poor, baby bi Buck. XD

Hmmm. Were parts of this scene cut out? We don't get to see Eddie on his own date with Marisol, but constantly looking over at Tommy and Buck? Boo. I'm glad we at least got the BTS photos, then. But seriously, why!? That was gonna be so delicious.

Oh, Tommy's breaking up with Buck. I mean, good for him, and he ain't wrong after Buck's "after this, we're gonna go out looking for chicks" reaction, but man do I feel sorry for Buck. Him and Tommy might not be my end game (Buddie forever will be), but I do think this relationship could be good for our baby bi. Tommy being in the same profession, knowing what it's like to have this gap between who you are and the image of guys in your line of work, plus he's got more experience than Buck, is sure of himself, can help our boy figure himself out, and also Buck obviously does like his vibe. He deserves to be with someone he actually likes, not just the first woman willing to be with him that the plot pushed in his way.

Oh, baby Buck. :( You didn't even tell Maddie about Tommy. You really aren't ready it. But also (and as a Buddie shipper, more importantly), Tommy broke things off with Buck, but what is eating him up, is that he lied to Eddie. XD Yeah, this gonna end with wedding bells, sooner or later. On screen, off screen after the show ends with canon Buddie, or only in my head if 911 never dares make Buddie canon, I don't care. That kind of emotional devotion is not something that my hopelessly romantic heart can ignore.

OMG, this is how Buck comes out to Maddie? XD Via random pronoun mention, and as a by product of trying to figure out how to tell Eddie the truth? This is hilarious. lol It really makes it clear that, after all, the issue for Buck really isn't people knowing he is also dating guys (or checking their asses), even when it's the other closest person in the world for him, it's Eddie. Specifically. Buck's ready, even if he doesn't have the exact clear words yet, he's just not ready to tell Eddie. Can't imagine why. XDDD

What was that awkward post-sex scene with Eddie and Marisol? And the issues with her moving in are popping up a second after she has. But yeah, we have no idea who this woman is as a person, she's been a cardboard cut out so far, and then one of the first things we do learn about her, is that she would call her stuff better than Eddie's? Once again, this is not the stuff great romance is made of. Or... even just the stuff any kind of romance is made of.

Wait, Marisol was a nun, and Eddie didn't even know!? This whole ep is telegraphing in the news of how weird and awkward and underdeveloped this r/s is, not just for us as viewers who know nothing about Marisol, but apparently for Eddie as well.

And of course his Catholic guilt is gonna kick in now. I'd care, except 911 has given me absolutely no reason to. Seriously, I care more about Buck and Tommy after just 2 eps, than Eddie and Marisol, even though this is technically her 2nd season on the show.

Of course Buck went to find Eddie, and spotted him at the gym. Forever 201 vibes, with Eddie being the focus of Buck's attention. ^u^

I couldn't care less about Eddie's Catholic guilt crisis, and how it's actually a projection of what his real issues are with Marisol, but it's nice to see that as always, Buck's the one who can tell when something's off, and offer Eddie exactly what he needs (even when that's to talk to someone else, but Buck figures out immediately who the right person to address is), and then they just very naturally switch, because Eddie can also tell when something's off with Buck, and he wants to tell him something. Soulmates. THAT is the stuff that great romance IS made of.

:/ The imagery of Catholic nuns has not been around for over 2,000 years, please stop being ignorant about your own religion, and the very different way it looked in its early days.

Bobby is forgiven, he does give good advice, and his "her ex, the Lord" bit, which prompted that reaction from Eddie, is hilarious. XD

So... when Eddie is having issues with Marisol, he already knows he has to figure out how he feels about her, but instead of doing so, he goes to his safe place... Buck's loft.

Man, Eddie being into Tommy's choice of avoidning relationships with women, and hanging out with boys, after in the past, Eddie had dealt with his Shannon issues by running away from her, and re-enlisting in the army, where he gets to hang out with boys, when we all (Buck included) know why Tommy's "hanging out with boys"... I do like that if they want to (and hopefully they do), this further lays the groundwork for Eddie's own queer realization.

Buck and Eddie helping each other with their respective romantic problems, without realizing they are each other's respective romantic solution is gonna make me chew on my own fists. Again. But I'm not even a little bit surprised that Eddie was totally fine and accepting of Buck being bi, or that the first thing he thought of is how this reflects on them. Because their friendship IS way deeper and closer than normal for platonic friends, and Eddie's little reassurance is also an admission of that.

Man, for a second I was worried they also cut out Eddie in the loft, once more putting his thumb on Buck's pulse point possessively, in a perfect parallel to 303. I would have sued for emotional damages. But yeah, it says so much that the peak of emotional meaningfulness for Buck when coming out is in relation to Eddie, and that the scene itself peaks with Eddie, instead of finishing rushing out to take care of his own romantic business, hurries back to Buck first, to hug him, place his hand on Buck and give him orders. "Sure, you're gonna be dating this guy, but I'm still your real husband."

Well, at least Eddie amitted to himself and Marisol that he doesn't actually know her. But... I have never seen two people being both being so happy about not moving in together, and I'm supposed to think this r/s has a chance? Okay. Suuuure.

The scene with Buck going to Tommy to set things straight ready for something was lovely, it was nice seeing him excited, and get to choose, and hear he's wanted. But since the note Tommy and Buck's storyline in this ep should have ended on, is Buck showing Tommy he's ready enough to let others know he's dating a guy by inviting Tommy to come with Buck to Madney's wedding, then why is the very next scene playing the romantic switch again, making us think Buck's car just arrived at the wedding with him and Tommy, only for Buck and Eddie to walk in together? I see what you did there, 911.

Thank you for reading! If you're looking for more, you can find my s7 reactions tag here, and more of my Buddie meta and content in my pinned post. xoxox

[theromanticrationalist]

Young Sheldon Series Finale: 7x14 Memoir

THE SHAMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰

Okay, so I have a lot of mixed feelings about this episode. I do not think it was very elegant in its execution, firstly, and secondly WE SERIOUSLY NEEDED MORE SHAMY LIKE WHAT THE HELL YOU GUYS IS THIS ALL WE ARE GOING TO GET OF SHAMY FOR LIFE??? Ugh! I was hyping myself up so so much about seeing married old couple Shamy, and don't get me wrong, it was amazing, but also in other ways disappointing. It seemed very limited in its emotional scope, and while I loved that it was brought home regarding Sheldon's relationship with his own son, it didn't quite reach the emotional heights they were going for, or at least what they could have gone for.

LIKE WHY COULDN'T WE HAVE SEEN SHELDON ACTUALLY INTERACT WITH HIS CHILDREN YOU GUYS WE WERE ROBBED 😩😩😩

AND SHELDON HAS A BABY GIRL AND WE DIDN'T EVEN GET TO SEE GIRL DAD SHELDON OR EVEN KNOW HER NAME I AM DEVESTATED

I know there was a limited time to the episode with them having to conclude all the storylines and everything, but they could have made this last episode an hour, would it have really killed them? It was like we were given a peep-sized hole view into Shamy's family life, and that was it! I wanted THE WHOLE PICTURE, I wanted to see it sprawling and majestic in all its beauty!!! UUUUUUUUUUUUGH!

Although, when Amy stepped towards Sheldon threateningly to get his cute ass into the shower and get ready for their son's game, I about lost it! OMG. Momma Amy don't play! And Sheldon cowered/flinched like he just KNEW to his bones that he crossed the line and lost the battle! (The blood was draining from the boy's face big time!! 😂😂😂) That was kind of hot not gonna lie... 🥵 *fans self* *swoons* *faints* But why did Amy get rid of all his nerdy shirts?? 😭 LET THE BOY LIVE HIS LIFE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! But we did get to see him in his cute cuddly robe most of the episode and then sporting his hot Dad-polo shirt! So that was something! 😍

Another aspect that I didn't like about this episode is how they handled the situation with Mary Cooper. I believe it is very truthful, unfortunately so, that those who are "adults" in our lives fail us at the times we need them the most, but I don't like how the episode tried to frame it in a good light. The fact that Mary Cooper essentially emotionally abandoned her children and was forcing them to get baptisms (spiritually abusive) was pretty messed up! The way that MeeMaw placed the burden of responsibility on Missy and Sheldon (children who the adults should be supporting during what is quite literally the worst time of their lives!!!) was also super messed up too! Yet none of this is called out for what it is, but instead the writers try to turn it into a special, warm fuzzy moment between mother and son! Nah, I'm not buying it. Especially since the relationship between Mary Cooper and Sheldon is so special to me. I really don't know what else they could done, but I don't believe they should have done any of that. It was a really weird and awkward note to end the series on, even if it was hilarious how Sheldon showed up to his baptism in his whole scuba outfit! (Made even more hilarious by the fact that we learn that despite all of that, he still got an ear infection! Oh son...)

Oh well. I guess it is what it is! I am still just trying to process it all. I will probably be watching the Shamy moments on repeat forever! And I guess go back to my headcanons...

Oh, final note: I was seriously thinking for a moment there that Sheldon Prime and young Sheldon were going to meet! I think that would have been kind of cool actually if we got Sheldon talking/interacting with Sheldon (particularly for the Iain and Jim interaction!), but maybe it would have been a bit too on the nose. Although, that is Sheldon's MO. Still, I really, really loved that final moment when Sheldon Prime walks through his house in his memory and then turns around and it flashes back to his younger self speaking to Missy. I actually think that "last" moment between Sheldon and Missy is achingly beautiful as he tells her that he has no choice but to remember her, and she just laughs at him smugly. *lays down cries cries a lot*

[kissingrhi]

i can’t stop thinking about remer with a size kink TAKE MY PHONE AWAY

this request actually awakened something in my soul

matt's 6'2 [weeps] [wails] [falls to the ground]

definitely realized it in one of the dumbest ways imaginable and was Super embarrassed

like you were probably just comparing hand sizes with him and in his mind he's like "am i attracted to this???"

spoiler alert: he absolutely is

while he is very crude sometimes, he can actually be very gentlemanly!

so he had nothing to do but sit and blush (at least in the beginning) when you would playfully poke fun at how "gargantuanly tall" he is or ask him to carry you everywhere

only way you got it out of him was during an extremely drunk make out session at 4 am

you two smelt like liquor and sweat and you can vaguely recall him mumbling something about how easy you are to move, how "pliant you are in his hands" (his excuse: he's an emotional drunk!)

even though the next day when you brought it up he was absolutely mortified and threw a pillow so hard he thought he'd knocked you out, the secret was out

from that point forward, he was basically shameless

giggles like a mad man at the sight of his hand against your ass, even in the most intimate scenarios

"it's like i can cup both your cheeks with just my fingers" "please shut the hell up"

whenever you wear his clothes he loses it

"you should know better. last time i slammed you into the wall so hard i think there's a dent."

the KING of goofy dirty talk

he'd bust out laughing while fingering you and be like, "aren't you just so precious and small? snookums." with a pinch to your cheek while you're literally grinding against his fingers and begging for him to touch you

once when you were on top you dragged his hand up to grasp around your throat and you're sure you've never seen him that aroused in your life

his eyes darkened and he squeezed a gentle push into one of your pulse points and the same exact time he thrusted up into you, proceeding to ravage you just from how much of your body his palms could cover

whenever you two fight, which is a lot and usually over very stupid shit, it'll most likely end with him pushing you against the wall and fucking you right there

"keep mouthing off and i'll show you how small you are next to me"

such an ass about the difference in your sizes in and out of the bedroom

100000% uses you as a headrest

finds it very endearing and very pleasing when you gag on his length

"no, no it's okay, baby - i'm too big for you, aren't i?" with the stupidest grin on his face

in his sellout era he was the cockiest of all, swinging you over his shoulder and giving your ass a firm smack whenever you'd frustrate him, all while laughing maniacally (it is extremely hard for him to take sex seriously!)

he holds both your wrists in one of his hands during doggystyle

he gets extremely aroused when you take control and the size difference even catches him when he's feeling more submissive

like when he's panting while making out with you and grinding his clothed cock against your knee and you mumble, "not so big and bad now?" into his mouth and against his tongue.....he cannot handle it. will cream his pants. has creamed his pants. doesn't wanna talk about it.

him holding your entire body and moving you while fucking you!!!!! the control does wild things to him

"i can just have you however i want, huh?"

he is so cocky and goofy in bed i cannot stress this enough

[jade-kyo]

RvB 20th rewatch: s12

Aaaagahhahhsjshaj the mid point to the end…. Fucking agony

I never noticed the cabose written in bullet holes on the wall. Nice reference.

“I AM FUCKING AWESOME” that single moment made me fall in love with Felix…. Yeah that didn’t last

“Yay I have friends!” Me too Caboose

“You’re oddballs that don’t exactly fit in” I feel like the Chorus trilogy is just a love letter to what these characters represent to… well people like me who found comfort in a group of loser assholes finding strength and connection in each other

There is a warthog that is absolutely freaking out in the background AGDKHAKSHS

AYO Ray and Michael cameo!!!

SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER

Grif’s mental breakdown

Hmmmm thinking about Locus and Felix not being able to return to normal life after the war…

AAAAAHHHH THEIR STRENGTH IS THEIR IDIOCY

I do feel that sometimes they overuse animation in this season… I think animation should be reserved strictly for the most necessary and funniest of bits and bad ass action scenes

Caboose gets to be the one with a good bad idea!!!!

WHY SNOWMAN

DR GRAY!!!!!! MY BELOVED

It really was a big brain move to make the feds actually not evil at all and kinda just as pathetic as the rebels

HOLY SHIT HES BILINGUAL PLEASE DONT KILL ME

“You give meaning to meaningless objects and meaningless people and then risk your lives to protect them, where’s the sense in that” I’m telling you this arc is a love letter to what this show means

Gray is unhinged- she fits right in!

Bro just got incinerated

FELIX YOU RAT BASTARD

I felt so betrayed- in hindsight I really should’ve seen it coming but I thought Felix was funny

Yo I never actually caught that Locus hands the grenade to Carolina- for some reason I always thought she just had a grenade on her

CAROLINA BABYGIRL!!!!!!!

YOU FUCK!!!!! (Just so we’re clear that was an absolutely necessary animated bit 👍🏼)

AAAAHHHH EPSILON AND CAROLINA MY BELOVED AHSKHAKSHSKHSKSH

THEYRE SO SILLY

DELTA!!!!!!

THETA!!!!!

I love the fragments ajkdhakshksh

“Just you and me sis” I AM SO NORAML ALANSKLA IA AMANA SNORNSMNSK JAKAHSNLAJANKSJSKSHWKBSKSNKSHWKSHMSK

PSYCHOANALYSIS FOR EVERYONE!!!!!

Love that Caboose is the only one who didn’t do something to the ship

I AM AN EMOTIONAL TIME BOMB Jesus Christ

“I believe he said he was paid in babies”

Lopez a real one for being the only one to remember Doc

Love the conversation between grimmons back at the crash site. nuance about Simmons and leadership or something… if you catch what I mean… Restoration (what who said that)

“MY LIFE JUST FLASHED BEFORE MY EYES!! IT WAS AWESOME!!!” Quoted line

AAAAAHHHHHHH TUCKER AND WASH!!!!!!!!

Dr. Gray my beloved

TUCKER CABOOSE MOMENT!!!

Wash was pretty dumb to just accept Freckles without question but also I never questioned it either so I can’t exactly judge

CABOOSE MY BELOVED AHAJSJAKDHKSJSKDN

SO SHUT UP AND GET OVER IT!!! Caboose finally gets to be the one to tell someone to shut up!!!!!

“Just say you’re sorry” agskahkshskjsksAJGDKAHSKHDKSGSKVDKDJKSN THEY CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER SO MUCH

CHURCH TUCKER MY BELOVED!!!!!

“Seriously? That’s it, no ‘I’m sorry’ nothing?” Carolina I feel you but also if these guys weren’t completely emotionally constipated at all times I probably wouldn’t love them as much

Also Tucker and Church’s little moment of poking fun at Carolina is so cute omg

Trocadero you are truly something to behold

TUCKER YOU ARE THE BEST OF THEM!!!!!!!

Imagine if Tucker and Church had also gotten caught in Locus and Felix’s teleporter… wouldn’t that have sucked please god I already have a big fic I’m planning I don’t need another

COLONEL SARGE

Why is Carolina so damn BIG next the chairman in that picture ajhdkahsj

P.S. suck our balls

Being completely honest I do think s12 is a little bit of the weak link in the chorus trilogy. It’s not bad but I just find more enjoyment in s11 and s13 but it is possibly Tucker at his best GOD I love him… anyway, pain 🙂

[1moreoffkeyanthem]

WELCOME BACK!!! That’s right fellow humans, it’s the second episode of

Bedtime Stories With PCE

And man did I enjoy writing this one, my sweet boys, Stan with the broken ribs and struggling with being hurt for the first time since running dry, his super awesome sponsor, Kyle w the solutions, Moose being the best lil cat ever, just!!!!! And this one is really important to me, because it is SMACK DAB in the middle of Broken Bottles From Apartment 2 after our beloved vet tech Stan gets kicked by a scared horse at work, setting the ball rolling for the rest of that story. Essentially I wanted to address more of his mentality following that incident, and to have y’all meet his AA sponsor! Iconic. Here’s

•coconut yogurt•

“Jesus, dude, that looks bad.”

“I’m-“ Stan cut off with a sharp *schh* as Kyle helped him the rest of the way out of his scrub shirt. “Fuck, I’m okay.”

Breathing fucking hurt. More than that, he was seriously bummed that not only was he on bed rest for two weeks (something that his partner would no doubt enforce with an iron fist), but he was gonna be stuck to paperwork once he could finally go back to work. And it wasn’t like he could quell the boredom by slipping away to the clinic for a few hours while Kyle was at his own job, because Wendy ran the front office and would not hesitate to rat him out.

“Baby, they’re only a little cracked.”

Kyle rolled his eyes and carefully helped him ease to a more comfortable laying position on the couch, gently resting one of the big ice packs they always kept on hand over his side. “Where’s your discharge shit?”

“Front pocket,” he muttered.

Kyle grabbed the papers and scanned them quickly. “Hairline fractures… bone bruising, sweetheart, how on earth are you breathing?”

“Carefully?” His partner didn’t seem to like that response. “Ky, I’m okay. You know how much worse it could’ve been?”

“YES! Yes, I do, Stan! Don’t fucking-“ his face softened. “Don’t smile like that about broken ribs, dude.”

“I’m not smiling about that; I’m smiling about you.”

“You’re hopeless,” Kyle laughed. “The hell am I supposed to do with your hopeless romantic ass when you say sappy bullshit?”

Stan might’ve been a little foggy from the pain. Maybe. “Aww, babe, C’mere,” he struggled to open his arms, which was annoying, yeah, but he wanted to hold Kyle.

“Dude, I am SO not laying on you.”

“Just a little?”

“No.”

Kyle went to read the paperwork again, fully ignoring Stan’s efforts to get cuddled. “Babe…”

“Your prescription should be ready, dude.” Kyle knelt down to kiss him. “Gonna be good if I’m gone for a few?”

Stan pouted, knowing damn well he was being dramatic, but not caring. “I don’t want it.”

“We went over this, sweetheart. You had a problem with alcohol, not pills. Is it just because you don’t like taking stuff anyway?”

“…yeah.”

“Okay.” Kyle kissed him again. “You’re sure?”

Honestly, he wasn’t. There were a lot of feelings coming up right now. Kyle noticed, because of course he did. “Stan, I know that face.”

Against his will, tears started trailing from the corners of his eyes.

“Oh, dude, I know.” Kyle took Stan’s face in his hands. “Look, I really don’t want you to hurt, okay? I know you’re emotional right now. I’ll give you your meds when you need them, and you don’t need to think about it. I can ask the pharmacy about the info too. Hon, we’re gonna know exactly what you’re taking, and you’ll be just fine.”

“I- I always heal fast.”

“You do,” Kyle assured him. “And there’s nothing wrong with needing a little help, okay?”

“Uh huh.” Yeah, he would call his sponsor. He needed to talk this out, with someone who got it. Kyle understood for the most part; he literally had a degree in psychology and had been firsthand through an eating disorder, which was its own form of addiction, but, well, specifics. “I’m- *hic*- gonna text Mark, maybe zoom into tonight’s meeting.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Kyle rose and ran his hand through Stan’s hair. “Ten minutes, hopefully.” He glanced at the corner and laughed. “Oh, poor thing doesn’t know what to do! It’s okay, Moose, c’mere, keep your dad company.”

Their cat slowly crept up to the couch, perching on the arm like a sentinel and making a cute little “mrrmm”.

“Good boy.” Kyle spun his keys once around his finger, and put on a serious face, staring down at Stan with one eyebrow raised. “Now, don’t you move.”

“Just stay where I can see you douse the lights.”

Kyle laughed. “You’re incredibly lame. I’ll be right back.”

That laughter seriously helped so much. “Okay, dude, you know where to find me.”

Moose had started purring, asleep next to him by the time Stan worked up the motivation to get his phone and send Mark a “yo I got the fuck kicked out of me by a horse I won’t be there tonight”. The old man immediately called him.

“Hey,” Stan answered, trying not to laugh at how fast that call was, because he knew that would feel awful.

“The hell do you mean, “hey”, Superman? How’d you get kicked by a damn horse?”

“Oh, you know.” Just hearing his sponsor’s voice helped. Some of the older crowd at AA had taken to calling him “Superman” too, which was objectively funny, and also comforting to hear, especially right now, when he was feeling vulnerable. “Went to give him an antibiotic shot, he got scared and bucked around, broke my ribs.”

“Christ.” He could practically hear Mark rolling his eyes through the phone. “Leave it to you. How ya doin’ with all of that? Gonna be able to come chair tomorrow?”

Judging by how much he was hurting, definitely not, even if Kyle would let him leave the apartment. “I was thinking I’d Zoom in. Will you, uh, do you think that’d work?”

Mark chuckled. “Well, I don’t know much about the video callin’ you young folks do, but I’ll figure it out. Might need ta get Laura to help me. She’s good with technology.”

Laura was a woman even older than Mark, who was not good with technology. Oh yeah, this was gonna be fun.

“Seriously though, kid, are you okay?”

Stan sighed. “It’s- I’m nervous,” he admitted. “About the feelings this is gonna bring up. We’ve talked about my coping mechanisms before, like how I like to move, when I start feeling down, instead of drinking? But I…”

“You can’t go for a hike or work out with busted ribs,” Mark finished. “I know being injured, havin’ to stay put, that’s a trigger for you. Like the bender you told me about in high school, after you broke your arm.”

“Yeah…” Not even Kyle knew how bad he had spiraled that time. He knew it had been bad, but not to the extent that it had gotten to. Getting hurt because of something he loved, combined with the timing and completely changing his career path senior year, all of that had led to a full depressive episode, complete with binge drinking and attempting to cut his cast off with bolt cutters. “I still could’ve been scouted in the spring,” he muttered dejectedly.

“But you chose to quit football,” Mark reminded him. “You’ve said you don’t regret that. You remember why you don’t regret it?”

Reaching up to pet his cat, the little creature who had been the driving force to him actually applying his degree, Stan was reminded that he really did like how his life was turning out.

“Yeah. I’m where I’m supposed to be, right?”

“Not for me to say, Superman,” Mark said. “You’re a damn good vet, and gettin’ hurt because of your job happens.” The smile was clear in his voice. “You’re more worried about the horse, ain’t ya?”

Stan once again had to force himself not to laugh. “Dude, he was scared. I was literally coming at him with a needle.”

“And what would you do if you were in his horseshoes?”

“Mark, dude, please don’t make jokes, laughing hurts like a bitch.” He checked the time. Kyle would be back home any minute. “Same thing, though. Ky’s gonna be on my ass about painkillers. That’s… uh, kinda why I needed to talk.”

“Hmm. I gotcha. You’re worried about the addiction potential? Combined with being home alone until you go back to work?”

Hit the nail on the head. Stan nodded, then remembered that Mark couldn’t see him. “Pretty much. I’m just… I haven’t been hurt this bad, since running dry. I’m not sure what to do to distract myself, honestly.”

“Alright.” Mark could be pretty straightforward, when it came to a course of action, a lot like Kyle. “You like them video games, right? And reading your fantasy books? Bet you got one downloaded on your phone right now.”

As a matter of fact, he did. “Uh, yeah, Atherton, I think”

“I don’t know what the hell that is, but you catch my drift?”

Moose had moved down to drape over him like a scarf, warm and little and soft. Sweet little guy; he always took care of his dads. And Stan had a support system. He’d be okay. “I’m picking up what you’re putting down, dude,” he said into the phone. “Distractions that aren’t physical, but keep me engaged, right?”

“And bingo was his name-o,” Mark confirmed. “Good to think of some that you can do when you’re my age, anyway. You ain’t gonna be Superman forever, right?”

“Dude-“ Stan heard the security door open, finally. Kyle.

Mark interrupted. “I know you got that whole thing about age, kid, sorry. I know you’re strugglin’ so how’s about we just focus on today. That boyfriend of yours taking care of ya?”

“Mhm. I’m pretty sure he just got home.” Yeah, definitely, because Stan could hear the voice of Sheila Broflovski through the door, and Kyle probably didn’t even have her on speaker. “Yeah, he’s home, and on the phone with his mom.”

“Uh oh,” Mark laughed. He had heard many a tale. “She’s gonna give you an earful. I’ll let ya go, then. You can call me anytime, okay? It works if you work it.”

“It works if you work it,” Stan repeated. “Thanks, dude. I’ll probably skip tonight, but I’ll call into the meeting tomorrow, okay?”

“Gotcha. Tell Kyle and y’all’s critter I say hi.”

“Will do.”

Right as he ended the call, Kyle burst in, arms full of Walgreens bags and his phone sandwiched between his ear and shoulder, looking hilariously frazzled. “Oh my GOD, Ma, look okay, he is literally right here just- OKAY, Jesus, yes I’m putting him on-“ he gave Stan an expression that clearly was asking if he was up for this. Stan nodded and grabbed the phone so Kyle could get everything set down.

“I’m here.”

“STANLEY!!! Are you okay?! Oh my GOODNESS I can absolutely drive up- do you need anything?! Have you told Sharon?”

Kyle mouthed “don’t blame me”. Stan shifted a little. He’d been talking a lot for the past half hour and he was actually starting to have trouble catching his breath. “No ma’am, I- wait, how did you find out?”

“Your friend Bebe’s gossip list! She posted to Facebook and said “a certain vet got kicked by a horse” and I just KNEW IT WAS YOU! Kyle said he was picking up your medication?”

“Fuckin-“ Kyle took the phone back. “Ma, okay, I’ve got him. I’m going to take care of him and- Ma. I’m not putting Stan back on the phone. It hurts him to talk. Yes, I’ll tell his mom. No, he’s on bed rest. Do you seriously think I’m letting him out of my- okay, okay, sorry, no- oh my God, I’m not making chicken noodle soup, he’s been vegetarian for twenty years, Ma. Alright. We love you too. Christ, yes, I’m eating. Please don’t start right now. Alright. Yes. We got it. Okay. I’ll keep you updated. Yeah, love you. Bye.”

Kyle slumped over the kitchen island, groaning. “If you say anything about me being exactly like my mother, I’m gonna be super annoying and not run interference next time she calls.”

“Pretty sure you’re not beating the Sheila allegations, baby.”

“Ughhhhh.”

Stan reached his hand backwards, eyes closed, waiting for his partner to take it. “Talked to Mark.”

Kyle took his hand, kneeling by the couch and kissing his forehead. “Good, sweetheart. Do you think you’re okay to get some medicine in you? I know it hurts.”

He was always so thoughtful, so gentle with him, and not in a condescending way, either. No wonder Kyle was so good at his job. He could handle a grown ass man emotional over broken bones; angsty preteens were probably a cakewalk to him.

Stan bypassed the cat across his chest, lifting the ice pack from his lower torso. “How’s it looking?”

“Oh, honey.” Kyle sounded genuinely distressed, and Stan opened his eyes to see his partner actually genuinely distressed. “Stan, I can see the hoof print!”

“…damn.”

“Jesus, dude, you poor thing. ” He stood back up and grabbed the prescription bag from the counter, along with a snack sized yogurt from one of the bags. “Solution time.”

“I’m listening.” He’d take just about any idea. It hurt.

“Here’s what I’m thinking. I got a few things of that coconut yogurt you like. I checked with the pharmacist and she said we can crush up your painkillers into it if you want, if you’re not feeling the swallowing pills. I can keep up with your dosage schedule so you don’t need to think about it.” He tilted Stan’s face up to make sure they were seeing eye to eye. “But if you want to take them less often and stick to ice and over the counters, that’s okay. I’ll handle the thinking about shit, and you handle the taking it easy.”

Stan eyed the bottle. “Are they gonna make me sleepy?” The thought scared him.

“Oh, dude.” Kyle could strategize incredibly, though. “We can start with half, okay? It isn’t likely that they’ll knock you out, sweetheart. You’re not a small guy, and I asked. Dosage isn’t high. And you say the word; we work something else out. First priority is keeping you comfortable so you can heal, okay? Does that help?”

“I’m gonna be okay.”

“Yeah, you are,” Kyle assured him. “I’m right here, you know how to deal with this, and you’ll be better before you know it. Now, some meds and I’ll help you upstairs? We can take a nap? I’ll be right there, dude. Keep you from moving around too much.”

He knew damn well Kyle wouldn’t be sleeping a wink. But he nodded. “You’re for real gonna feed me my painkillers in yogurt like I’m a puppy?”

Kyle grinned. “Whatever works.” He reached over to pet Moose. “Whatcha think, young nastyman? Do I have good plans or what?”

Stan slowly sat up, an arm around his midsection and definitely not comfortable, but that was alright. Pretty soon he’d be able to breathe a little better. “What would I do without you, Ky?”

[themagnusbane]

GAP The Series Episode 8 Thoughts

I was out of my house for an engagement all of yesterday, and wasn't able to watch and react to this, when it dropped. Which is why y'all are getting my thoughts quite late. BUT, LET IT NOT BE SAID THAT I DIDN'T HAVE MY SAPPHICS KISSING IN THE BACK OF MY MIND THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE EVENT!!! Why do I have to be a functioning human, when I can just spend all day, lazing in bed and imagining that I was in this show and Tee was mine?????????????????

Anyway, on to my reaction.

Awwwww. And we're starting with that, hands-shaking-knees-knocking-breath-catching nervousness when you're in bed with your crush and your brain is scrambling with all the emotions!!!!! I really love how that nervous excitement is portrayed differently on both Sam and Mon. I AM SQUEALING like a fucking pig!!!

2. Wait hold up. So when she meant "let's go to bed" she really meant "let's go to bed?" Sam. Honey. There's a big bed. Right there? And you're with your crush!! She's lying right there! Soft and clean and wrapped in your sheets... BEDS ARE NOT ONLY MEANT FOR SLEEPING!!!!!

3. Sam inhaling Mon's scent is the most sensual thing I have ever seen. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

4. Wait. Wait. WAIT!!!!!! What in the edging nonsense is this??? Sam, what do you mean by you're going to bed. That can't be all. YOU BETTER COME FINISH WHAT YOU STARTED! Jesus. This woman. WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO MON AND ME???? You can'y have us hot and bothered and just stop. What the fuck?????

5. I am Mon's frustrated "tch" sound. I feel you Mon. I feel you. The audacity of her sexy ass. And the fact that she actually slept? THE NERVE!

6. Okay. That squeak at the screen is funny af. But also, I'm just noticing her nails. Sam, girl. I hope you weren't planning on putting those nails, with all 'dem stones inside my baby girl Mon. Cuz, hell to the NO! Where is your lesbian etiquette??? Get your nails in order!!! Santana taught you better than that!

7. Of all the things to be watching right now... Lions fucking? Seriously? THIS SHOW IS A FUCKING RIOT!!!!

8. Hehehehehehe. Mon is totally fucking with her. She KNEW what "Do it" meant, and totally decided to misunderstand it as wanting to pray instead. And you know what? Girl, I support you. Sam left you all hot and bothered, all night long. Let your inner brat shine!!!!!

9. Mon is giving you so many chances to just say it. Tell her you want to fuck her Sam. She wants it. You want it. WE ALL WANT IT!!!

10. Urgh! Kirk's back with his heterosexual bullshit. Boy, she's not going through with firing Mon, not because of your ass. But because that's her girl, and of course she wasn't going to fire her anyway. Sam is NOT interested in marrying you. EVERYONE can see it. Except maybe you. And her witch of a grandmother. Urgh! Future bride my ass.

11. Gghghghhjghjghjghjg. Chin and Yha are TOTALLY acting suspicious. Why do I get the feeling that both of them are dating as well. Rofl.

12. The hilarity of everyone assuming that Kirk and Mon are secretly dating behind Sam's back, and not realizing that it's Sam and Mon that are secretly dating behind Kirk's back. The drama of this whole scene is sending me!!!

13. Sam's coworkers: Ooooh Kirk must be messaging her to flirt with her.

Me, who knows it's Sam sending Mon all the kissing emojis and begging her not to be angry anymore:

14. Sam's friends are me! I am Sam's friends!!! See their excitement as Mon starts to describe their night together. I'm waiting for the "THAT's IT?????!" screech that would rightfully follow when she's done, cuz THAT IS HOW I FELT TOO!!!!

15. Jim's "OMG. I'm about to go crazy here" is making me feel so seen! Girl, you are about to go crazy, from just hearing about it. Imagine how I felt! I was watching the stupidity in real time!! Sam and her sexually frustrating ass!!

16. Give her ALL the advice Tee. Look at my queen Tee. She's holding court and laying down the law. "You don't have to top her, but be receptive." A FUCKING QUEEN!!! Tee. Mommy. Goddess. Top me. Please. I'm begging you. I'm begging you. I'm on my knees!!!!

17. Did Sam just tell Mon "to eat with you"? Cuz, it looks more "to eat you", if you ask me. And with Sam's smirk, and Mon's gulp, I think I'm right. Hehehehehe. I swear, if there isn't at the very least, some heavy petting in this office, I will riot!

18. Sam's "girl I was about to do a lady and the tramp re-enactment of the spaghetti scene, and you blew me off" frustrated huffs are sending me!!! And you can't even complain about that Khun Sam. Now you know how it feels!!!

19. She's adorable!!! She actually watched movies as research!! Sam my beloved queen.

20. The kisses. All that tongue. ALL THAT TONGUE!!! The hands on Mon's thigh. The "let me do it". The touching and kissing, and walking backwards, and kissing more against the stairs.... I am dead. Deceased. Dead and buried!!! Ghhjgjhghjghjghjghjghjghjghjghjghjhjg.

21. Did they just include a nosebleed in this??? I'm dead! I'm fucking dead! OMG!!!! Gghjghjgjhgjhgjhgjhjhg. This show is the best!!!! Rofl!!!

22. I love LOVE how they both called their individual friends to ask them about sex, when we both know their respective friends are actually already in their very own relationship. Hell, I won't be surprised if Tee and Yuki have already had sex. Tee's too smooth to keep a girl horny and frustrated. You know what? Good on Sam for asking Tee for advice. She and I KNOW THAT TEE'S GOT GAME!!!

23. Also, shout out to Yuki for knowing all about women having sex with other women!! Aaaaaaaand this totally confirms that she's been having sex with Tee. I can feel it in my bones!!!

24. Sam and Mon being oblivious to Jim bringing them whiskey to help them get out of their own heads and on to fucking each other, is making me laugh so hard. Jim, beloved. You are a service to sapphics EVERYWHERE!!! I am so sorry that your friend is a dumbass and her girlfriend is just as clueless.

25. FINALLY!!! SOMEONE SAID IT! Shout out to Jim, the patron saint of the lesbians!!! She finally mentioned the nails!!! I was wondering when Sam was going to realize it! Thank the fuck!!!

26. The way I was screaming in frustration at Mon stopping Sam from continuing. Like girl!!! We have been waiting FOREVER!!! But her asking that all important question makes so much sense. Sam is still engage to Kirk the heterosexual ideal, and it isn't fair to him or Mon for Sam to basically be playing them both. Now I know Sam has promised to break up with Kirk after she and Mon have sex, but you know what? I'm not holding my breath. Between Kirk and her grandmother, I don't see Sam being able to successfully end it, and that is going to cause my baby girl Mon, so much pain.

27. Baby's first orgasm. I am so proud. I'm crying. That was so hot. And so beautiful. Freen and Becky really did that. THEY DID THAT! You both did so good!!!

28. Yooooo!!! They actually finished the entire bottle of scotch. Wow! Just wow!!

29. Mon's satisfied "I got ate out for hours" smile is making me so damn happy. You go girlfriend!! You got the girl, the orgasms and that glow!!! Here is hoping we get many more of these before we are hit with the pain!

30. Fggjhghjghjghjghjghj. Sam's friends are the BEST. I repeat. THEY ARE THE BEST!!!!

31. Sam's giddy, "I did it with Mon" Facebook post, and smile. This episode has me giddy with ALL THE JOY!!! SO much joy!!!!

32. Look at them making out in the office. I love it for them! But they are sooooo going to get caught. But damn. Since Sam's gotten a taste of our girl, she just can't stop kissing her!!! And you know what? Valid! Absolutely valid.

33. Mon sweetheart. You're such a good egg. Look at you being so concerned about Kirk. You know he's not going to extend that same concern to you if he was in your shoes, right?

34. I knew it. I knew it. This thing with all three of them being on Facebook, and Sam, posting everything with such glee is going to come and bite them in the ass. Kirk might be a backstabbing twat, but he isn't stupid. He's going to figure it out soon. Best break up with him soon Sam.

35. Damn. Her coworkers really have spun this false narrative about Mon dating Kirk and that being the reason why she was fired. They have no idea that the truth is so much weirder than fiction.

36. Sam. Honey. What are you doing??? How can you even believe that Mon would do that that? You know her! Yes, I know it's your insecurities and fears acting up, but you know her!!! You know better than to do this??? You can't take all this shit that you're saying back. Why are you hurting your girl like this?

37. Aaaaaand of course Kirk is here to make everything worse. Boy, did you not hear her say that people at work saw you talking with her and holding her hands, and now assume that you both together? Why are you STILL talking to her and holding her hands???? Let her go, and go sort out your own problems. Urgh!!!!

38. Sam. Sam. Sam. Why? Just... why? Fuck.

39. Aaaaaand of course. Nop is just right there. Didn't she tell you she's not interested in you? When will you get a fucking clue? She's not interested Nop. Be a friend in this moment. That's all she needs.

40. Look at my baby girl crying. I should have known that all that joy in this episode was lulling me into a false sense of complacency. Now look. Mon and I are both crying. Sam why???????

41. You know, I can't believe I'm saying this, but Sam girl, Nop is right. WHY ARE YOU SO INTENT ON BREAKING YOUR GIRL??? WHAT THE FUCK?!!! Now you're implying that she's hopping from man to man? Mon. Slap her. Slap her. Just hit her straight in the face. WHAT THE FUCK?!!!!!

42. Oh no you don't. You have ZERO right to be crying right now Sam. None. ZERO. NONE!!!

Urgh!! Why??? Why couldn't we just get an entire episode filled with happiness? Don't I deserve good things? Don't we all?!!!! I swear, if episode 9 doesn't start with Sam on her knees begging, I AM GOING TO RIOT!! Y'all have a week to fix this. FIX IT!!!

[thatlovinfeelin]

Flightless Bird | twelve | Bradley Rooster Bradshaw

Synopsis: Josephine Wilson Miller is alone for the first time in her life. She got married after her first year of college and became a housewife, but that life is gone now. So she runs to San Diego, to her childhood best friend Jake, where she meets the man who could very well be her salvation.

series warnings: unplanned pregnancy, just pregnancy in general, talks of infertility. past mental and emotional abuse. anxiety. talks of women's reproductive systems (idk)

“What kind of crib are we supposed to be looking at?” Jake questioned as Jose walked him through some baby store in the middle of town. 

“Well, right now I just want a bassinet. They make some with wheels so I can easily move it, or some that are good to have right next to the bed so I can get to her during the night. Maybe a combo. But either way, I don’t want anythin too bulky.”

“Okay, something sleek and simple, got it,” Jake nodded, trying to act like he fully understood, “What is a bassinet exactly?”

Jose smiled and pulled him towards another aisle, “C’mon, I’ll show you.”

They walked the aisles for a few hours. Jose carefully looked over every option, talking Jake through the pros and cons of each. Jake, who knew she was going over all of this more for her own benefit than his, nodded and asked questions here and there to try and help.

Jose had a hand on her stomach the whole time, smiling softly to herself when she felt the baby move. It seemed so strange to her, in a few short months she would be able to hold the little human that was growing inside of her. 

“Have you thought of any names?” Jake’s question came hours later when they were on the way back home. 

She had, of course, but not very seriously. When Jose was younger she had a full list on the Notes app in her phone full of baby names she loved. Sometimes she had their meanings and other spellings, other times just the name and where she heard it. She deleted that particular note after the gynecologist appointment that changed her life at seventeen.

“No, not really,” She replied softly, “I feel like its still too soon to be makin concrete decisions like that.”

“Jojo.”

Jose blinked, he hadn’t used that nickname for her since they were little kids. It was like they outgrew it by the time they were in junior high. The sound alone made her chest feel almost funny. They weren’t kids anymore…yet he was still right by her side. 

“You’re almost in the third trimester,” He reminded her softly, “It’s about time to start making those big concrete decisions. I’ll even sacrifice my dignity and put on a pair of fuzzy socks and go through that book of names you have with you. We can pig out on chocolate and watch those sappy ass movies you like, if it’ll make it easier.”

They were at a stoplight, Jose could feel his eyes on her. But she only looked forward, trying to sort out all of the thoughts running through her head. She was a week away from the third trimester, and she was told to expect a premature delivery. Her team of doctors were going to do everything they could to delay, but she would probably be put on bed rest for at least the last month of her pregnancy, if she made it that far. 

“I think I need to tell my mama,” Her voice was so quiet Jake almost didn’t hear her, “I thought about writin her a letter. That way I don’t have to hear the disappointment, and I can just be done with it. I mean, your mama already knows, and I know she wouldn’t outright go tell anyone since you told her not to…but it’s still such a small town, everyone is bound to find out eventually.”

“You don’t owe that woman shit,” Jake clarified, “She lost all right to be in your life a long time ago.”

She only shrugged, her hands gently rubbing her stomach, “Maybe so, but she was in exactly the same place I am now. I don’t forgive her, and I can’t pretend to understand how she managed to be such a terrible and selfish mother, I really can’t. But, I have to believe that, in her own way, she did the very best she could. And I want to be able to at least tell my daughter, one day if she asks, that I at least tried, for her sake.”

Out of the corner of her eye she could see Jake shake his head, “Josephine Wilson, you are a better person than I could ever be. Because there is no way on God’s green earth I would try anything when it comes to that woman.”

“You’ll understand one day, Jakey,” She smiled softly as she looked down, “The world becomes a completely different place when you have your own child to think about. I haven’t even met her yet, but I know I would do anything for her.”

He reached over to squeeze her shoulder, “ You know, I always knew you would make a great mother. Somehow, even after you found out that kids probably wouldn’t be an option, I still knew you’d have one.”

“Jakey, you need to stop sayin things like that, I’m hormonal and I will cry. You know how much I hate cryin,” Jose laughed, coughing to cover up the tears that still managed to spill.

Hours later, Jose was sitting on Bradley’s couch with her legs in his lap. Occasionally he would gently rub her calf, almost like he didn’t even realize he was doing it. He was sipping on a cold beer as a movie played on the tv across from them. Jose couldn’t help but take note of not only how domestic this felt, but also how right it felt. 

Everything seemed calm and almost perfect until Jose jolted and let out a hiss. Bradley nearly jumped, head snapping over to look at her. Her eyes were closed and both hands were pressed firmly into a particular spot on the side of her stomach. 

“Are you okay?” Bradley rushed to ask. 

“Yeah,” She let out an almost breathy laugh, “Sorry, it’s just," She stopped again and rubbed her stomach, "Yeah, okay I feel you, chill out.”

“Jose, what’s going on?” Bradley was growing increasingly worried. 

She slowly opened her eyes. She could feel her cheeks growing red, slightly embarrassed for worrying him, “I’m okay, I promise. She’s just really kicking. I haven’t felt her kick this strong before, just took me by surprise.”

Bradley blinked, lips parting slightly, “She’s- she’s kicking?”

She smiled softly before holding out a hand for him, “Give me your hand.”

“What?”

“Just, give me your hand,” She nearly laughed, “I promise she can’t bite you.”

He rolled his eyes and put his hand in hers. She paused for a minute, feeling her stomach with her free hand before tugging his hand to lead him. She looked down at her stomach, smiling as she put his hand where the kicks seemed to be directed. Truthfully, Jose wasn’t even sure if he could feel them yet, but she swore she felt the little thumps against her hands.

“I don’t fee-” Bradley stopped mid sentence and moved closer, eyes widening a bit, “Oh.”

“Did you feel it?” She couldn’t help but feel excited. 

“I-” He shook his head, smiling as the baby kicked again, “That’s amazing.”

“Sometimes I forget that this is real,” She admitted, “Like, I’m in a dream or somethin and I’ll wake up and still be in New York.”

Bradley gently cupped her cheek, “I promise this is real,” His voice was deep and raspy, “Every bit of this.”

“I swear sometimes I’ve made you up,” She whispered, “If I’d known you were waitin for me on the other side of everythin, I would’ve left sooner. I would’ve found a way-”

“Shh,” He leaned forward to kiss her forehead, right where a thick crease was appearing in between her eyebrows, “We both had some things to work out first. But we’re here now.”

She shifted so she was now more on his lap than on the couch. He tucked her head under her chin and held her close. He couldn’t help the way his heart seemed to almost skip a beat when she nuzzled into his chest. He liked that he made her feel safe. 

Jose didn’t know how to put it all into words. She didn’t know she could ever have a love like this. Sure, it was still so new, and there was still so much they needed to work out. But he was here, regardless of the fact that she was pregnant with another man’s baby, and recently divorced from that man. He didn’t seem to care about all of the strings and baggage that came with her. 

“I like the way it feels when I’m with you,” She admitted softly. 

“Yeah,” He agreed, “I like that feeling too. I think I might like it more than flying.”

Slowly she sat up, “You don’t talk about flyin, like ever.”

“I love it, don’t get me wrong. Sometimes I feel like I was born to be in the air,” He told her honestly, “It makes me feel close to my dad, it’s one of the few things that does.”

“I feel like there’s a but,” She stated. 

He smiled softly and brushed some hair out of her face, “I like that I don’t have to be any of that with you. All I do all day is talk about maneuvers and how fast and hard we can push our aircraft. There, I’m one of the best of the best, and there is a shit ton of pressure that comes with that title. None of that matters here though, because I’m just Bradley to you.”

She gently stroked jaw, feeling the slightly raised edges of old scars, “I like just Bradley,” She told him honestly, “But I think I could love Bradley Rooster Bradshaw.”

He made a noise, almost like a groan and dropped his forehead to hers, “ Oh honey, I don’t know what I did in this life to deserve someone like you, but I’m grateful for it. I’m grateful for you.”

Warmth spread throughout Jose, she tilted her head so she could gently kiss him. Once, the idea of doing anything with Bradley scared her more than having this baby, but now she wanted to just do life with him. Somehow, she wanted everything with him. 

“I haven’t felt this way in a really long time,” She admitted, “I didn’t realize how much I was missing.”

He knew what she meant. For a moment, Bradley even wondered if this was how his parents felt in the early days of their relationship. Somehow, he knew that his parents would approve of the girl that was staring back at him. He wasn’t sure if his heart ever felt this full before. 

He kissed her again, one of his hands gently holding the side of her neck while the other was on her back to steady her. For a man who swore he wanted to go through life alone, Bradley was far too content to imagine going through life with Jose. 

It almost scared him. 

When they pulled apart, there was a look in Jose’s eyes that only served to spur Bradley on. He couldn’t help but smirk a little as he really looked at her, “Do you remember that joke you made when I told you what my call sign was?”

Jose more or less whimpered and dropped her head to his shoulder. She could feel her cheeks turning red. She thought he forgot all about that, since he never mentioned it again. Of course, she blamed it on the hormones, and would gladly tell him that now that he knew she was pregnant. But at the same time, even though she didn’t know him at that point, there was truth to what she said. 

“Don’t make fun of me,” She whined, “I told you I turn into a runaway train sometimes.”

Bradley’s laugh shook his whole body, “Honey, I’m not making fun of you. I thought it was funny actually, this sweet shy, southern, little thing making a joke like that. You have no idea how-”

She slid off of him almost too quickly. The movement made her a little dizzy, but she needed to say a few things herself before he got any sort of ideas. His cheeks were flushed, and his eyes were a few shades darker. In another life, she would be climbing right back on top of him. Hell, she wanted to climb back on top of him and never leave. 

“I have some…restrictions,” She blurted out. 

His brows scrunched together, not quite understanding what she was saying. She looked worried as she chewed on her bottom lip. Maybe a little guilty too, which made no sense to him at all. She had nothing to feel guilty about. 

“What do you mean, honey?” He asked her gently, stroking her hair. 

“I can’t-I mean it’s not-” She took a deep breath, somehow feeling like a teenager, “I’m on somethin called pelvic rest. It’s to cut down on any potential complications, because I’m already at risk for a whole lot of ‘em.”

He was rubbing her back now. Somehow it made her feel even worse. They were grown adults, yet she felt like a little teenager turning down her prom date at the end of the night. Granted, her prom date was Jake and she ended up pulling him into the bed of his truck with her in the middle of a field. But…she just felt guilty. She felt like she was leading him on. 

“I can’t have sex,” She nearly whispered, “I can’t do anythin related to it really. I’m not even allowed long walks. I understand if that isn’t something you can-”

“I’m not an animal,” He replied calmly, “I would never try to pressure you into that anyway, or heaven forbid force you. My mom raised me better than that. While I’m sure sex with you would be amazing, I’m in no hurry. I’d much rather both of you be safe.”

Jose’s heart nearly melted, “I wasn’t trying to insult you…I just…I don’t think I’ve ever really done this before, Bradley. I mean, with Jake we grew up together and it all just kind of happened, it's like we never even thought about any of it. With Michael…I’m not even sure what happened with us now, honestly. I feel like I’m just fumblin around in the dark when I’m with you.”

He smiled sweetly, “Then I guess we’re both flying blind. Because I can promise you that I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. If I haven’t told you before, I’m at your mercy. You call all of the shots here, you get to be in control.”

“Why?” She found herself asking.

“Because you deserve all of it,” He whispered, “Every good thing this world has to offer, you deserve it and then some. I’d give it all to you, if you’d let me.”

She sighed, tipping her head back to his chest again, “How are you okay with all of this?”

He wrapped his arms around her again, but looked at an old picture sitting on the mantle across the room. In the few months since he met Jose, sometimes he swore he could feel his parents guiding him towards her. He even went as far as to talk to Mav about it once or twice. 

Bradley always seemed to feel restless before, almost like he just didn’t belong where he was in the world. Yet, with Jose, everything went quiet. Yeah sure, he had no idea what he was doing with her. He really was flying blind when it came to really loving another person, but he sure as hell loved Jose. Even if he knew it would scare you shitless to tell her  that just yet.

He could almost imagine introducing her to his mother. Maybe Jose would have her little daughter in her arms. His mother always loved babies, she made him promise to save the box of his baby things for when he had a family of his own. He knew that his mother would’ve cried when he told her that he gave away his blanket, but they would be good tears. He knew Carole would be proud of him. He wished that he knew for certain that his father would feel the same way, but he seemed pretty sure.

“Because, honey, I feel like I was meant to find you.”

[matchbet-allofthetime]

The hell, y'all??

Had me going into ME2 thinking Grunt was gonna be some like... Lil bab in a big body but NAWH DUDE IT LIKE EMOTIONALLY MATURE AND SHIT

Dude asks for help. Dude talks about his overwhelming emotions. He's the most emotionally mature and open character in the entire fucking franchise. What the fuck.

The only thing about it for me that I GUESS could strike others as him being as child-like as you all depict him is "oh he types funky. Cool. I am also autistic and also overexcited ADHD. This is evidently what causes this in him. Also typing isn't something okeer would've probably taught his perfect experiment to do bc violence and Krogans. Makes sense."

PLEASE Y'ALL THIS IS A WHOLE ASS MENTALLY 21+ YEAR OLD MAN

Like Jesus, I thought he was gonna make me giggle n shit and be like "awwww little baby man"

Not my Shepard getting choke slammed and my first thought being "😳 this cannot be who the fandom calls Shep's son..." Like come the fuck on

(partially genuinely upset because I feel like I'm gonna get hounded for thinking Grunt is entirely an adult and thus I want to treat him like every other adult character I consume content of and partially just like,,, really? So were y'all just infantalizing him all these years? He is obviously and canonically full-grown and was created to be a fully-matured korgan. And I mean, that scene where you let him out the tank??? HAD TO BE FOR THE FANS. BECAUSE THEY DENIED US WREX, AND GRUNT TOO- BUT WE GET FANSERVICE AT LEAST.)

Seriously, every damn comic or drawing of him I've seen or whatever makes him sound like, 14-16 in his mannerisms and maturity at MOST which just... Is not accurate? Based on current interactions in ME2?

Like yeah you can absolutely make him the adult adopted kid of Shepard, go for it! No issues there. But don't treat him like he's a teenager he just isn't.

But yk. Anyways lmao just ranting because it's kinda irked me a tad. (Please don't come after me, his defunct chara sheet on bioware's site says he's like 22 from what I remember. Chill before you decide to rag my ass. He is the same age as when we meet Tali.)

[decaydanceredacted]

don’t get me wrong i love the way hornies think of william but as as hugeee TAI TV lover/obsessed autistic(tm) i think non ooc bilvy deserves some love too

like he’s a kinda quiet artist who tries so hard to be so kind and understanding and make his fans happy even if they can be a bit weird sometimes. i think all the people hypersexualizing him made him a bit uncomfy and confused but he was just trying his best to be understanding(see dick mold dildo post.) contrary to popular belief i don’t think he was even that shy,, he was just quiet. i mean fast times makes him sound like a bit of a slut but also tad bit stalkerish in hs and siskys description of meeting him is literally that some girl in pe mentioned how hot he was. he was not really a bullied loser outcast or super duper insecure ever imo. because of see above i also don’t think he was really a like nervy stuttering mess that just loves to get fucked until he couldn’t remember his own name, and i don’t think he was THAT whiny and pathetic- but i still think he was kinda loud which is a fun contrast to how quiet he usually seemed. all that being said i think he was a top but def not a like big hard mean dom, maybe sometimes he soft dommed just adoring his partner and doing all the work to make them feel good while calling them sweet little things(see the wine post i sent in) i think he was bi but had sex with women a good amount of the time. i think he liked having them in his lap while they were wiggling around on his cock and sucking hickeys into their neck and softly playing with their tits and moving a hand down to their clit while whispering ‘taking it so well sweetheart, my good little girl, you feeling good baby?’ i think he kissed all super sweet and gently holding their face with one hand and playing with their hair with the other. i think he was a lover. i think as he got older maybe he liked it when partners called him daddy just in the way that he could take care of them and protect them. i think he could get a bit protective and possessive sometimes. i think he’s still always just had like straight up vanilla missionary sex a good half of the time where they’re not taking themselves too seriously. also just. hands. his fingers are so long and elegant i think he would spend so long just feeling girls up and smoothing over their curves. i need to feel two of his fingers steadily pumping in and out of me while he kisses at my thighs and clit. i need him to write a poem or little song or something afterward about how pretty i am, in general and during sex. like talking about how lovely i am in bed without getting super vulgar. i need him to call me his boy. i think he’s just so artistic and philosophical/emotional about everything he does and that extends to the way he thinks about sex,, like it’s never super aggressive and impersonal to him even when it might be kinda rough/a one night stand. i think he’d be super cuddly and get you water afterwards and maybe give you a massage with his deft pretty fingers slowly and intentionally working over your muscles to relax you until you fell asleep in his arms. i think he likes wearing nice outfits and feeling good about himself. i need this man biblically.

anyway j thought i’d send some love to more realistic william sex/partnership because i love him he’s my favorite he’s my girlfriend and i love him so much. obvi it’s probably not actually realistic cause yanno,, i don’t know him or his sex life b j my idea of it based off how he actually seemed to act. <3

also idk why b i feel like the fact that i’m an autistic transmasc with heavy ass daddy issues(bats eyelashes endearingly) is important context to all this

-spiral anon

.

[thegenuinezacrekshipper]

This Is A whole Judgmental Villain Post

I am going to be judging how good of villains each of these idiots are, if they have a low score I can hardly call them a villain. These are specifically MyStreet villains for now.

Ein. He definitely meets the criteria for a villain but he's just not... That good of one. First of all, how the fuck did he go from genuine emotions to "oh wow I was faking it to become the alpha and bla bla bla"? No one fakes emotions that good, this story plot was bullshit. His main goal is to... WaiT what's his main goal again? There's the turn everyone into a werewolf supremacist thing, the fuck lemme make out with this basic ass chick thing, the uwu get revenge on ultima thing[get in line with everyone else lol], and then there's the simping for Michael thing. The main one is probably the last one in season six cause that's all he talked about. He got a lot of people killed but he can't do it without help. He is nothing but a sidekick. 3\10.

Zack. he doesn't meet any criteria why the fuck is he in the villain place. The whole reason he even worked with Michael was money yet his dumbass wasn't willing to kill for it? He's pathetic as fuck. His main goal was to threaten and torment Derek in Starlight, that's not intimidating to the rest of the group at all. if he actually did something besides torment and be a condescending asshole to his ex boyfriend then maybe he's meet the criteria, but he doesn't. The cheating doesn't make him a villain, as that would put so many other characters as villains too. Yeah he's an asshole and all, just not really a villain. 0\10.

Elizabeth. The fuck she do besides kick Garte's kneecaps out and have a fairly seductive voice? She also saved Zack from drowning, how dare she he wanted to die anyways[which is sad but let's not talk about that]. She'll probably be better in the future so I give her 4\10.

Derek. No. No no no. He is not a villain in the slightest he is an antagonist, there is a BIG difference. His actions are more fucked up then the others though so he gets to be talked about. First of all the nicest thing he did to Aaron was get him a dog, then lose it. Now for the actual options, Derek has a weird way of showing he cares about Aaron. That includes making agents stalk him to make sure he doesn't hang out with humans he could put in danger, hiring some weird stoner dude to assault his son then hug him, intentionally calling his son a monster whenever he does anything wrong, throwing a temper tantrum and breaking his phone, and he's also really good at lying. probably learned it from Michael cause there's no way he picked it up himself. Oh also 7\10 for creativity.

Xavier. Best villain 100% \s. He really needs to take a break from the internet because it is damaging his emotional health and also his villain vibes, I can't really take a computer need who's really only obsessed with seeing the ultima seriously. He gets really fucking emotional when it comes to exposing the ultima so it messes up all his Damn plans. He only stayed in FCU because he's only a villain meant for college. 5\10 cause I feel bad for him.

Ivan. This bitch could've just stayed a player and saved his pathetic life from becoming an asshole, yet he chose the wrong path because he's really stupid. All he does is prank people and harass Lucinda, and also turn people into babies. He's literally nothing but a kindergartener to everyone. 1\10

Michael\The Demon Warlock. Wow someone who literally could give less of a fuck about Aphmau and Aaron's relationship's existence? Perfection. Amazing. Anyways, some of the bad things he did were controlling people to kill others for him, kill Terry's dad who apparently existed, beat up Travis because he's a nuisance and he's in the way, try to kill a useless God who does nothing for the community, didn't kill Derek cause Derek killed himself, killed one of his partners daughters cause he doesn't give a fuck, and he also killed Rachel. The fuck is up with that. How dare he. His main goal is to kill Irene cause fuck if I know I guess they broke up or something. He is also weird and predatory just like Terry, which is why I can't tell them apart. 9\10 cause the Katelyn thing ruined his intimidation.

That is all for now.

[crayonurchin]

15 questions, 15 answers, tagged by @empressofthelibrary!

are you named after anyone? Sort of. My first name was the only name that mum and dad agreed on, but both my middle names are after my grandmothers!

when was the last time you cried? Today, I was walking the dog, saw a really whimsical fallen tree in the woods, and got emotional over it. That was just a little tear up though. A big cry was yesterday, reading more news on Palestine.

do you have kids? I do not, but I think in like, 10ish years, I'd like to adopt a kiddo. When I'm financially, emotionally and mentally ready for it, being a parent genuinely sounds nice to me, but I have 0 intention of ever giving birth. I've wanted to adopt since I was about 8 years old. I'm 27, and it's only NOW the thought of being pregnant isn't horrifying beyond words to me, but even if I wanted to have a uterus baby, I'd still adopt.

what sports do you play/have you played? I did quite a few martial arts classes growing up. Boxing, Kick boxing, karate, judo. I went to a cheerleading class once, but I got really bored because they wouldn't let me join in, so I left ^^;

do you use sarcasm? ... I don't know??? I've been told I am when I'm not trying to, and told I'm not when I'm trying to. I don't know, am I using sarcasm??!

what is the first thing you notice about people? Personal energy. As in, what's the vibe they're putting out. It sound so corny I know but I meet endless people at work and can only remember a few faces, but vibes have stuck with me.

what is your eye color? Dark brown! They look almost black unless I'm in the light, and it makes it look like I have giant pupils. I really like my eyes ^^

scary movies or happy endings? Oddly enough I'm all happy endings these days. I used to looooove scary movies, and while now I appreciate a good horror thriller, too much just drains me. Nothing wrong with a struggle in the film, but now, I want my good ending escapism.

any talents? I'm really good at throwing food into the air and catching it in my mouth. Other than that, I'm not too bad at singing belt style and I'm really good at performing for kids. parents tell me often they're impressed I keep the kids attention

where were you born? Hammersmith in West London in a particularly gloomy hospital XD Seriously, google pictures of Hammersmith London , some of the old buildings are gorgeous but it's all getting pretty grey over there

what are your hobbies? It's drawing. I just love to draw so much. Writing is something I'm trying to make into a job so it's less of a hobby now but I still like it. And while soap making is done only for conventions, I really enjoy doing it. And dungeons and dragons. Loooove d&d

do you have any pets? A very old cat named Crikey and a middle aged dog named Butch. Crikey is my baby boy and I adore him

how tall are you? 5'7

favorite subject in school? I liked art, it was fun and until A-Level my teachers kicked ass. Funnily enough I remember liking history until we had to do exams, where I learned liking history and being good at history are different things, and I started to hate it.

dream job? At this point, I'd like this. I'd like to write/ illustrate and publish books, and let that be enough to live on. As a side thing, I want to sell my soaps at a few conventions a year, and do kids parties maybe 1 day a week. So, all the stuff I'm doing now, I'd like to do at a level I can live happily on.

Okay, I'm tagging @paeonia-horse @theamishpirate and @kajeaynart