#nobody talk about the fact it says 20 up but im following them NOBODY. TALK.

[absurdumsid]

ままままち産裏社会パロ do you know the English name of this au?

hiya !! im not very good at japanese but i believe the translation would be "(mamama) machi sans underworld society parody" i like to interpret it as "machicoasa's sans underworld au" !

"ままままち" refers to the artist's name ! they're an insanely good artist, i found them through pixiv but I haven't come across any english translations of the actual AU content (unfortunately TT)

i think "産" may refer to Sans ? (google translate romanized it as "San" so i am not sure, it could be the honorific ?)

"裏社会" or ura shakai usually means underground society or underworld

"パロ" is paro, short for parody ! I like to interpret it as AU !

[vulpiximisa]

Me: i think im burnt out from idols, i should watch something else

Me also: oh boy colorful boys, lets go DreamFes

So the fact that Crunch only has the second season should have deterred me from even starting it, but I guess I didn’t want to watch anymore IMas Side M, so here we are.

I also did not look beforehand if there was any seiyuu I know in it, but this seems like the type of show that has Nobodies. Anyway, I’ve done this before with Futsal Boys, so I can handle this.

So if I thought UniteUp felt like a sports anime, this would be the more generic, played up straight up sports anime of idols. It’s preeetty much Futsal Boys but with idols. In terms of it selling something that doesn’t quite line up exactly for the target audience? I’ve never seen any of the Puri (not Cure) series or Aikatsu, but I’m assuming those are also “magical” transforming idols using cards? The most I’ve been exposed to costume changing cards is Happiness Charge Precure, which, I’m assuming was inspired by series like that. I’m not a fan of it, but I get what vibe it’s supposed to be. So like, sentai toys, but with idols. 

Anyway, not gonna lie, I binged the first three episodes straight up because it was entertaining enough. It’s not as deep as I would have liked, where Blue’s tragic backstory was Not the “I watched someone I care about commit suicide” that I thought it was gonna be, but I guess that was semi traumatizing for a kid. I can’t say the characters are necessarily deep, as Kanade’s reason for dropping soccer kind of pisses me off, and we could have gotten a little more something from Keigo before he left for the 20:32 train. (Why was this the make or break role? Was there an on going rivalry between Keigo and Shin before?) 

The pacing of the series is too fast but at the same time doesn’t really give information. I feel like it really is targeted towards 5-8 year olds with the way the story is written. (Why the characters kept dredging up 2032’s lyrics and talking about it like that. It just felt like it was written sooo simple-y.) Also the semi-repetitive lines/gags from ep 1 and 2, mostly episode 1? Felt like they were dragging for time at some point (a minute too much of Kanade handing out balloons, a minute too much of Kanade and Yellow competing)

Also, I love transformation sequences IF THEYRE NICE TO LOOK AT. The boy’s Dorika henshins are way too samey, so yeah I’m gonna be bored at them. I get it's so they have a generic enough pose so they can CG slap the DoriKa outfits on. The landing pose, dorika catch animations are nice and fun, but iunno, I guess I like my smooth 2D henshins where they are fun to look at.

I complained about IChu’s performances but I see that DF is going to try to cram a performance into each episode. I get it I get it. I think it works for DF though, even if I think the performances themselves are kinda goofy. I like the face model for the guys, but the rest of the body feels a little wonky. (Their hands look under rendered and blobby sometimes I don’t know.) Hold the Phone, this was from 2016, which was also around the time I7 came out. And these guys look leagues better than the first MonGen MV, sooooo I think I know who is winning in this category. 

I guess I can get to talking about the characters now? …I uh, I think Kanade is cute ngl. I like the ponytail and even though his seiyuu sounds unrefined in terms of vocal range/acting, I like the boyish tone. Everyone is generic as hell though, but I was semi pleasantly surprised that Kanade (Red) was butting heads with Yellow (Junya, if I feel like remembering it) instead of the usual Red vs Blue. 

Speaking of Blue, I can’t really say that Kanade’s reason for wanting Shin to stay was super developed but ngl man that chase scene and “I dont want to not see you” etc etc, that shit got to me. See, the tone could have been more serious, if Shin’s tragic backstory was about suicide, so Kanade chasing him thinking that Shin would have followed the same path because of the scandal, etc etc etc. Anyway I’m already writing fic about them in my head while watching the episode skldjflkslfk

Also ngl, Mikami grabbing Kanade and throwing him into the car saying he wanted him Sure Was A Way to Sell to Fujoshis. It’s me, I’m the Bitches. Mikami is supposed to be the fun old star, I guess, I like him, he’s fun. The DF president is also cute! Anyway, I’m looking forward to meeting the other veterans of Sankishi.

Uh oh, I accidentally looked at the seiyuu casting and I guess there actually Are notable seiyuu in here. That’s fine though, I like when they give newbies a chance, but it’s too detached when I know Nobody. (Futsal Boys.) 

Anyway, I guess I’m looking forward to Purple Sweets Shota and his maybe not so tragic backstory with the Black other Shota that might be his Twin, because we love twins. (Not me.) Also, I couldn’t tell if Keigo was also an idol in the opening or if it was someone else? Will also look forward to finding out. 

[glitchdollmemoria]

big long diary esque ramble about jewish conversion below the cut bc mmmm the paragraphs

its sinking in that now that im finally settling into a synagogue i feel comfortable in, im gonna have a community i can celebrate the holidays with, and i can actually learn firsthand how to celebrate them... really fucking exciting

i dont know when ill be able to actually officially start the conversion process, both because im flat broke and idk how much everything would cost AND bc this synagogue is still looking for an official rabbi rather than guest speakers (transitional period since the last rabbi moved away), but in the meantime i feel like im very quickly being taken under the congregations collective wing yknow? so im excited to start celebrating jewish holidays with other people who know what theyre doing rather than having to cobble together what i can while i sit in my apartment lmao

overall im really really happy to finally be attending. its been way too long since ive been able to regularly attend a congregation. and this one is a conservative synagogue, and ive only ever attended reform synagogues before. the one i went to back in my old town was great, i adored the people there and the way we worshipped and everything was so comfortable, it was absolutely where i needed to be during that time. but based on my research and my experiences so far, im fairly confident conservative is the movement for me. this synagogue is definitely where im meant to be now, and my thoughts are basically... while my partner and i do have a plan on where we want to live someday, thats still years down the line most likely, bc im poor and hes in college, so im HOPING that this synagogue will be the one i attend throughout my conversion. i mean id be fine with starting here and having to transfer rabbis later but im mostly hoping ill be finished up before that time comes

theres something very familiar about this congregation. something in the grain of the wood, and in the worn out books of the library. its comfortable and welcoming and it tells me this is where im supposed to be, at least right now.

also - i keep thinking back to when i attended the reform synagogue in this city. the service itself was great, but i didnt really feel like i fit in with the others, especially the people my age. one of the other 20-somethings said that the people at the conservative synagogue were all "boomers" or smth who were unaccepting in some way or another, and idk if she had her own bad experience here which i really wouldnt want to brush off, but so far everyone has been very kind. i was immediately welcomed once i explained that im wanting to convert, multiple people went out of their way to help me and invite me to stay longer and attend more events. i was immediately regarded as a man, and maybe that was because i was wearing a suit and my voice is deep from hrt but it was still very reassuring either way - an older man told me very firmly to put on a kippah and while i joked with my friends that i felt like a kid being lightly chastised, it was still a really nice feeling to not only be seen as a man but to have someone insist on me following that custom.

and then afterward, over lunch, i was chatting with the other congregants and ended up talking about my partner, and referred to it with multiple pronoun sets and explained that it uses any pronouns. nobody was rude at all about that fact, and one man was clearly a little confused by me switching around words and pronouns but was very very obviously doing his best to be respectful and understand as best as he could. he said he was working on understanding these things better for his kids iirc.

overall i feel like this synagogue is a safe place for both myself AND my partner, should it ever visit and want to attend with me. yes, most of the people here are elderly, but everyone was friendly and so far people have been respectful when it comes to queerness and conversion. id say the worst thing i heard someone say was a small dig at reform judaism, but even then, another member was quick to shut him down.

it frustrates me a little to think that the people here might be getting labeled as intolerant in one way or another if thats not really the case, if its just because theyre older. again, i dont want to brush off any bad experiences someone else mightve had, but i also worry that there might be some preconceived notions at play here, yknow? but i guess in the end theres not much use dwelling on it. im just happy to feel at home in a congregation again, and to feel like im back on track making more progress toward my conversion. im glad to be meeting all these people and finding my place in a community instead of feeling so isolated so much of the time.

[nomynoya]

since im stupid and i didnt find anything im gonma write it myself

⚠️ no spoiler ⚠️

Black noir× Male reader

warning :⚠️Smut/Lemon/Nsfw⚠️

You and Black noir have been a couple for a long time and ofc nobody knew about it since Homelender could have killed you both so you two simply decided to keep ur love relaptionship as a secret .At home you two acted like a normal lovely couple and at work everybody saw you two as good frieds you were the only one that could tell what he wanted to say etc... so nobody in general ever suspected anything but how did you two met?

You were super excited to start working whit the seven they added you bc of what happened whit the Deep they needed someone new diffrent to make everybody forget about what happened, since putting Starlight in the Seven was a great idea you would have been just fine for the medias the new group photos and The Deep's ex fan so you started working whit them , and after a while you find out about how messed up everything was and how fake everybody was well Starlight was cool but you didnt want to be shipped whit her since she had a bf so you kept your distances even if the 2 of u were friend

everybody seemed to have depression , lack of love ,diffrent problem angry issuees etc... except someone and that was Black Noir you thought that since you two were the most normal people there why couldnt you just go for it and talk to him well that was harder then you thought

You: Hey Black Noir ! How are you?

BN:....

You:Cmon i dont bite you can talk to me ! Since we are the only normal people here

BN:...

he didnt say anything he looked at you and then just went away

this may sounds stupid.. but you didnt know anything about this man not even that he couldnt talk ! But the fact that he didnt talk to you was driving you crazy you kept tryng to talk to him diffrent time and not living him alone for not even 5 sec but nothing he just kept ingoring u like you werent there .

So one day you decided to wait for him to eneter in the elevator and then press that one button that block it so you two could talk

there he was he was waiting for it and after one person got out and he get in you literraly runned inside ,and that kinda scared him , you pressed a random floor and then that button , then you turned around to look at him

You :OK FINALLY WE CAN TALK!

Black noir was super confused like "wtf are u doing"

You :say something!anything!

he took a notebook and wrote something on it and then gave it to you

"i cant speak"

you jaw dropped and then you started laughing apologizing ,thinking about how stupid you were, that idea never crossed ur mind at all

You:then guess i will have to say something!

PANIC

you didnt thought about what to talk about at ALL since you were sure that he could talk and he was just ignoring you on purpose

so you said the first think that crossed ur mind

You: A DATE!

BN:...

BN:?!?

You:THATS WHAT I WANTED TO ASK YOU *wtf am i sayng?!* BUT YOU NEVER STOPPED AND LISTENED TO ME AT ALL !

you pressed accidentally the button to restart the elevator but you two were to much into the conversation to realize it

You:GIVE ME UR NOTEBOOK

he did in total confusion

you wrote down ur number and adress

You:COME TO MY HOUSE AT 8:00 PM DONT BE LATE

the moment you finished talking the elevatoor reached the last floor and you runned away leaving him there alone whit ur number and adress super confused

after that accident he actually came to your house(the date went well and you made him laugh after you explained your plan to him ,why you followed him and how you had a panic attack etc..) and the two of you started dating and eventually you (whit you i mean you two)became a couple

you only trusted each other and told each other everything

today after work at ur place

You: Earvy im home! (his real name Btw)

you walked inside ur house closing the door and running upstair to search for ur beloved

You:Wtf?

the bedroom door was closed

You:What...??babe open i need to change

after 20 min he opened the door (Black noir keep his mask on at home in case someone broke in witch already happened before he moved in bc a crazy fan wanted to take a pic whit u)

You:what took you so long ?

Bn: ...

(you asked black noir to learn the sign language whit you so like that you could understand him more not just at home at work too )

You: so?

Bn: nothing ( he said whit the sign lenguage)

You: are you hiding something?

Bn:no i would never

You:then what take you so long?

Bn: i was...sick

You:you are lying to me arent you?

He didnt say anything and he tried to go away from the door to escape from this akward moment but you stopped him there was no way you would have let this slide

You:arent we a couple?We are supposed to tell everything to each other are we?

He nodded keeping his head low

you took his hands

You:Pls tell me and if its a problem beetween us we are supposed to solve it u dont have to feel afraid to tell me anything

He looked at you and then dragged you to the bed to sit

You could feel your heart almost explode you thought that he was going to broke up whit you for something that you did

he took his notebook and wrote something

You : *thats it...but i dont want to broke up...i thought that we were ok and he that he loved me...*

he gave it to you and then he looked away

"Can we..cuddle? or just pass time together i feel like you dont have time for me anymore and i missed you a lot...you always come home late more late then me and then we just sleep i feel like you find our job more important then us "

You: im sorry REALLY sorry i didnt know that you felt like this

you realized that he stopped working as hard as he did after you two started dating just to pass more time whit you and now you are the one that work to much

You: i will come home more often and early i promise...but why did it take you so long to open the door ?

he pointed at the notebook still not looking at you and at the right bottom of the page there was a " → "

you turned the Page

"i need you..i really do..and its a shame for me to say it"

You: *needs? what is he-*

you look at him and then realized what he was doing

You:Earvy u were..

he nooded still not looking at you he felt so embarassed like he did something wrong

you took his hand kissed it and place it on your face he didnt expected you to do that

You: you can take off the mask if you want

he didnt want to but it wasnt a problem

you got up from the bed and you knelt down between his leg (he was still on the bed)

You: can i?

he nooded

you took off his pants and boxer he was hard

you started sucking it and little moan escaped from his mouth they werent really loud (he cant talk but he can make noises is canon) but since the room was silent you could hear him easly

he stroke ur hair a little

Bn:ahh~

You continued sucking it faster and faster as his moan got a little more hight

Bn: ah~....ah~!

you couldnt see him but his eyes rolled up and just when he was about to cvm

you stopped

he was confused but you immediatly started kissing his muscled body after pulling up his t-shirt liking his nipples and biting them

You:we should get rid of these

after sayng that you took of his and your t-shirts the sensations of your skin touching his just made him more harder

you started touching his dick and biting his neck whispering thinks

You: i need you...

You:i want to be inside of you

and whit that you took a Little bit of his pre-cvm and then shove a finger inside of him and started pushing slowly

Bn:ngh~

You:you're so tight

you put a second finger inside

he moaned but in more intense way and you could feel that his ass was literally suking ur fingers

You: good boy...you want more dont you?

he timidly noded

so you got up and took of your pants

anddd it was in

Black noir let out a loud moan you grunted it was so tight you eventually started moving and every move was one of his loud moan he couldnt control himself he was so embarrassed and he covered his face even tought he still had the mask on

Bn:Ohh~ Ahhh~

You:dont hold back i wanna hear you scream for me

he crossed his legs on your hips and put his arms around your neck it felt soo good that he couldnt even think straight anymore whit one hand you touched his dick and that was the last drop he cummed and yelled out one last moan

but you werent done wet

you it took out and set netx to him

You:my turn no?

he slowly got down on the floor and got on his knees in front of your huge cock beetween ur legs

You took his face whit one hand

You:Suck it

he lifted up his mask a little and started sucking it

Bn: Gulp Gulp Gulp Gulp(lmao)

and he started touching himself too

Bn:Mh~

You:im about to-

you took it out and cummed in his face

you two just took a shower and cuddled in the bed

You: i love you

he hugged you and you knew that was is way to say " i love you too"

Black noir kinda of remind me of this dude his name is Spiderman Noir and its literally like the spiderman verison of Black noir(movie name spider man into the spider verse)

[suneatersupportsquad]

red handed; colby brock

request:  im not sure if you do requests or even any imagines for colby brock anymore but i was wondering if you cold make a exception, so basically the plot is that the reader met colby through kat and since then they hit it off, now their in a secretive relationship the only person who knows is kat but she only knows the reader has a crush on colby. one day everyones hanging out in the same room room and colby is sexting the reader, sams curious to whos hes texting and they find out their dating.

dedication: @whydontweanons​

genre: fluff, subtle smut?

pairing: colby brock x gn!reader

characters: colby brock, sam golbach, katrina stuart, corey scherer, jake webber, kevin langue, brennen taylor, devyn lundy, tara yummy

word count: 1.8k

warnings: alcohol, what would probably be underage drinking, NSFW (barely), sexting (duh), mentions of COVID-19, quarantine

a/n: of course i’ll still write for sam and colby!! it’s just that, since i’m not as active of a follower of them as i used to be, my goal is to write for fandoms that i’m more invested in at the moment. but, honestly, i don’t think i could ever really stop writing for them. i love those boys so much. also this plot made me laugh so hard when i saw it in the best way possible. getting this request honestly made my day, so thank you for that!! anyways, i’m a little rusty, but here we go.

important links: masterlist

find more fics at my new blog @trapboysbunny

You and Colby had known each other for a long time - pretty much since he’d moved to LA with Sam - and you had been involved romantically just as long. You had met him and Sam through Kat on a boring Saturday night when all their friends flaked on coming to a little kickback they were hosting. Trying to be a good friend and cheer the boys up, Katrina had invited you to hopefully kickstart some emotional momentum. Your eyes met Colby’s for the first time and you clicked. Something in your gut had told you that the two of you would end up being close, and it was right. You had hit it off immediately, not taking very long to start laughing at one another’s corny jokes and telling stories over Smirnoff Ice while some random late night show played in the background. From that night on, it was history.

Since then, you two had been practically attached at the hip. If you weren’t sitting on the same room or facetiming, you were definitely texting one another. It became a running joke in your friend group that you two had evolved into a pair of siamese twins, or that being without you gave Colby separation anxiety. The two of you found it even more amusing when you actually began dating, not long after that fateful first night. It amazed the both of you that you were able to hide your relationship so well. No one had a clue. The two of you laughed about it quite often, actually, over late night phone calls and tipsy afternoons spent only with each other. No one knew, and nobody needed to know.

Colby, due to the internet and his fanbase being the way it is, preferred to keep his personal (and especially romantic) relationships more on the private side. His intent wasn’t necessarily to hide his feelings and relationship with you from his friends, but that particular topic of conversation never really came up in your friend group. Everyone had just kind of figured that everyone single would simply date someone when they were ready and tell everybody about it when they felt the time was appropriate. It wasn’t that Colby didn’t want to tell them, he just didn’t see the point in going out of his way to tell all of his friends hey after God knows how long I finally have a partner. He just didn’t want to make a big deal out of your relationship. Knowing his friends, they would definitely make it into some type of big thing, not to mention that Jake would dub the occasion as “cause for celebration” (which was really just an excuse to drink more). So Colby preferred to keep things on the quieter side for you two; neither of you wanted to make your relationship into an object for speculation.

Kat was the only person out of all of your friends to have any knowledge of your feelings for Colby. And thank God for her; if you didn’t have her to gush about Colby to, you probably would have either exploded or died. Or both. And she was there for every single second of it. She loved hearing about your movie nights, your urban exploring adventures, the sweet yet mundane things he would do to make you happy, literally anything. She ate that shit up like a man starved, and you did the same for her and Sam (regardless of the fact that their relationship was public already). You hadn’t told her explicitly about the nature of your relationship with Colby, really just gushed about your ever-growing love for the boy. Unbeknownst to you, she firmly believed that you only had feelings for Colby, clueless to the fact that the two of you had actually been dating for quite a while now. With her “go get ‘em, tiger” comments, along with similar remarks, you assumed that she had some sort of idea about your relationship with Cole, hence why you had never explicitly told her about your secret boyfriend. Kat, being the good friend that she was, never spilled your “secret” feelings to anyone else. Not even her boyfriend.

Eventually, quarantine started up amidst the international COVID-19 pandemic and you had begun practically living with the trap boys. A day without you in the house was enough to prompt concern for the boys, minus Colby who always knew the real reason why you weren’t coming over. This soon became the new normal, you taking a “day off” every few weeks to get tested just in case. At this point, it was almost comical that no one had figured out you two were dating yet.

One particular weekend afternoon, everyone in your friend group was hanging out at the house. You and Colby were sitting on opposite sides of the room, you next to Kat and Colby seated beside Sam. It was particularly warm today seeing as this Saturday landed smack in the middle of the infamous August heat wave, so you had thrown on a tank top and some shorts, nothing to flashy. Colby had dressed similarly, wearing only a muscle tee and a pair of trunks.

You were sat beside Kat, the both of you trying to listen to the story Devyn was telling. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t ignore the way your boyfriend was staring at you from across the room. You looked away from Dev for just a second to shoot him a glare when you realize exactly why he’s looking at you. The speed at which the blood rushes to your face is dizzying, and you drop your head to stare at your lap. Motherfucker- You sigh as you pull your phone out of your pocket. “Quit it with the blowjob eyes asshole,” you type before pressing the blue send button.

You feel his gaze break as his phone vibrates. Trying to ignore him, you refuse to meet his gaze again, putting all of your effort into focusing on Devyn’s story. Seconds later your phone vibrates in your pocket. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” the screen reads, and you shake your head.

“Uh huh sure ok.” You pressed send again.

Another few seconds passed and your phone vibrated again. “That shirt looks really good on you.” 

You blushed as you read the message, flustered by the comment. Brows knitting together in confusion, you looked up to find him staring back at you with a dopey grin. You hunched over your phone and sent a message back. “You really think so?”

“Yeah, of course,” Colby replied, a gray typing bubble sitting under the message. “But you know how it would look cuter?”

You cocked your head to the side and typed out your response. “How?”

“On my bedroom floor.” You almost snorted at that, clamping a hand over your mouth to prevent any noise from escaping. Typical. Thankfully no one had been paying enough attention to you to notice that you were distracted.

Colby, on the other hand, wasn’t so lucky. “Give me this, dude,” Sam said, snatching the phone out of Colby’s hand and effectively bringing the conversation on their side of the room to a halt. “You haven’t been listening for like the past 20 minutes, dude. Now let’s see what’s got you so distracted.”

“You don’t need to look at that, Sam, it’s not that important-” The tall brunette sounded slightly panicky as he reached and grappled with Sam for his phone. Sam played around for a little bit before finally reading the screen, eyes widening in amusement.

Upon finishing his reading, Sam lowered the phone and Colby relaxed, already knowing that he was caught. “So who’s ‘angelcakes,’ huh Colbert?” Sam prodded teasingly.

Colby blushed ever so slightly, rubbing the back of his neck. “They’re just a friend-”

“Which friend, huh?” Sam continued his teasing, growing louder and louder with every response until all eyes were on the two boys.

Colby shrugged, trying to be nonchalant but looking more stressed than ever in actuality. “Just a friend.”

“What do you say we call this friend, huh boys?” Sam suggested.

Kevin nodded, agreeing. “I think we definitely should.” Brennen also nodded when Sam looked to him for approval, essentially finalizing the decision.

“Okay then, let’s do this thing!” Sam yelled, earning cheers from all the other curious folks in the room. The blonde boy pressed call and Colby simply held his face in his hands.

You jumped when your phone rang, honestly having forgotten that oh shit, I’m angelcakes. Everyone turned to look at you curiously, Colby even peeking through his fingers. You didn’t even pick up the device, already knowing whose name would be lighting up the screen. “You gonna pick that up or something?” Corey asked awkwardly.

You shook your head, leaving your phone face down in its spot beside your thigh. “No, it’s probably not important anyways.”

A beat of heavy silence passed before Tara spoke. “Gee, they sure aren’t giving up. Maybe you should answer it.”

“Nah, I’m sure it’s just-”

“Yeah, you should answer the phone, Y/N,” Jake agreed, the pieces seeming to click in his head.

You sighed, burning bright red to the tips of your ears. “Okay okay, fine.” You stood and clicked the answer button. “Hello?”

And there it was, your voice echoing from Colby’s phone. The room erupted in cheers of disbelief, the boys pouncing on Colby and the girls slapping you in playful excitement. “I knew there was something going on between you two!! There’s no way there couldn’t have been -- I can’t believe you didn’t tell me!” Kat squealed, smushing you in a hug.

The rest of the girls echoed the sentiment, a chorus of ‘same’s and ‘I can’t believe you’s. It took a while for everyone to calm down but, once everyone settled, you and Cole managed to get some alone time. The two of you escaped out back, the less than mediocre breeze cooling the sweat that slicked your skin. You held each other, almost as though you were about to start slow dancing. “Damn, caught red handed, huh?”

You laughed breathily, leaning your forehead against his shoulder. “It was only a matter of time, ya know?”

“I know,” he agreed, cheek pressing against your hair. “I’m glad we don’t have to be weird around them anymore.”

“Me too,” you hummed.

Colby pulled away a little bit, just enough for him to look you in the eyes, your arms still around his neck. “Hey.”

You giggled, confused. “Hey.”

“I love you.”

You smiled your confirmation, eyes twinkling under the cheap backyard lights. “I love you.”

.x

[spencerhotchner]

Alternative {spencer reid}

Chapter 1 

summary: Since quarentine was announced, Y/N decided to rewatch all seasons of Criminal Minds. On a lonely night she wished she could be in that universe instead of this. What happens when she wakes up in 2008 in Quantico?

warnings: angst, a very confused reader, regular cm stuff and my grammar (if you find anything else pls lmk

word count: 2k

a/n: i have this idea while watching a movie about parallel universes and all, so i just wanted to try this out. it will be a 10 parts series! im not really sure about this, i think i kinda hate it but im posting it anyways lmao. i hope you gonna enjoy!

series masterlist

part 1 | part 2

You woke up feeling dizzy and with a major headache. At first you thought it was because you drank a whole lot of wine last night but then you saw yourself in a room you never saw before. You stoop up quickly trying to understand where you were and how did you end up there. You were sure that you have never been in this place before, and it was scaring you that you showed up in there.

There was a mirror nailed to the wall in from of you almost forcing you to look at your own body, that made you notice that you were still wearing the same clothes from last night, but you weren’t home. Not being home was odd given by the fact you stayed there with your family and two friends you invited over, since there’s a whole freaking pandemic going on and you for sure did not want to get sick or get other people sick. 

“Did I get kidnapped?” you think out loud. “No, I just watch too much Criminal Minds.” you tell yourself, trying to calm down.

You reach for the face mask placed on the nightstand, getting ready to leave this random place and go home. You tried not to freak out when you realized your phone was gone and the only cellphone in there was probably as old as your grandmother. You dialed your moms number about five times and all of them went on voicemail, making you curse mentally. 

This can’t be happening. Not to me.

As soon as you leave the apartment you were in you realized you weren’t in your hometown, definitely not. It was crowded, like, really crowded and no one was wearing any face masks. Where did the freaking pandemic go? You wondered while you felt like a misfit for being the only one wearing it. 

“Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?” you ask an old lady walking by.

“You’re on Main Street, sweetheart.” she says.

“No, um, I mean the city.” you watched as the old lady looked at you with a funny face, as if she was calling you crazy on her mind.

“We’re in Quantico, dear.”

“Quantico?” you repeat, mostly for yourself then for her. The lady started at you like you were an alien. “Thank you so much, ma’am.”

The air started to go low on you, how did you get to Virginia, anyway? That was across the country from where you lived, Bellevue in Washington state. You started lost walking, trying to understand what the hell was going on. It felt like you were on a parallel universe, like you were in a dream but couldn't wake up and it sure felt very real. You stoped a jornal shop taking a lot at the last newspaper in there, trying to figure if something happened that you were missing. However, nothing reported there shocked you, what did, though, was the date. 

July 1st, 2008

You were about to ask someone about it when you bumped into a blonde woman, falling on the ground. As soon as you looked up, you almost chocked yourself. If the day was already weird, this was even weirder. A.J Cook was standing right in front of you with a concerned look. You couldn't really say anything, just staring at her like she wasn't real. It was weird seeing her in front of you after only seeing her through screens. 

“I’m so sorry!” she said as she offered a hand for you to get up. “Are you ok?”

“I- um, yes! I’m fine.” you san, getting the dirt out of your outfit. “I’m a big fan of yours! Wish I had my phone here to take a picture but- sorry.“ you stoped talking, realizing she probably doesn’t care.

“Big fan of me? Wow, howcome somebody’s a fan of me?” she sounds surprised.

“Well, you’re on Criminal Minds.” you say as it was obvious. 

She looked at you as if you were out of your mind. Not that you weren't thinking otherwise at the moment, anyways. 

“I’m on what now?” she asked.

Maybe you got confused and she was the wrong person, but she looked so much like her to not be her. If they were not the same person, then definitely twins. This was so weird, once again, you found yourself asking ‘what the hell’ mentally.

“You’re JJ, Jennifer Jareau, FBI Agent and all.” you say, trying one more time. “Behaviour Analysis Unit...”

“Yea, that‘s me.” she let a nervous laugh comes out of her mouth. “How do you know me?”

‘This is weird’ you thought. How does she not understand where you know her from? Literally Criminal Minds, like you said at first. ‘Maybe this is all a dream.’

“I saw you on tv” you try.

“Oh, I see! You like law enforcement?” she asks you.

“Oh yes, I’m in law-school to be a judge someday.” you answered. “The show, all of it just makes me wanna put all them bad guys in jail.” you say, laughing a bit. 

“The show...? What?” you hear her whisper, but decide to ignore it. “What’s the mask about?” JJ asks, making you look at her surprised.

“Um, covid-19?” you say like it’s obvious, because it is.

“Oh, sure...” she smiles as she says it, almost like she's only agreeing because she won't discuss it. “Great talking to you, really, but I gotta go, FBI duty calls.” she jokes.

You smile at her watching carefully as she picks up her phone from her pocket and pick up a call. That phone looked awfully old, like 2000’s old. Why would a famous actress have that kinda of phone? Then, you looked around trying to understand more about what was going on. It was all too out of place.

First, nobody wearing masks, not even a single person but you. Second, you were in a city in which is miles away from your own. Third, a famous actress acted like she’s nobody. And fourth, the date on the calendar said 2008.

If it wasn’t just impossible I would say I time travelled into Criminal Minds universe.

After standing there for literal 10 minutes trying to figure it out what you were going to do, you decide to go to the police department. After all, you may have been abducted, right? Because you didn’t have any knowledge of the place, you took quite some time to get there. As soon as you got there you sigh in relief, that has been quite a walk and damn, you were tired of this situation. 

“Excuse me, ma’am, can you help me?” you ask to the lady standing behind the counter.

“Sure, dear. What do you need?” she looks up at you, taking her glasses of her face.

“I think I might have been abducted?” you start. “I woke up in this random apartment.”

“Maybe you had a one-night stand.” she said putting back her glasses.

“No! I am sure I didn’t because first of all, there’s a pandemic going on, second of all I was in Bellevue in Washington state when I went to sleep.” you yell, involuntarily, desperate to make her believe in you. 

“Miss, I’m gonna need you to calm down or you will be escorted out of the building. You’re probably on drugs, there's nothing we can do for you.”

“Fuck you.” you say as you watch her face get all red.

Frustrated. That could define what you were feeling, scared and worried could do the work, as well. What were you going to do now? Go to the FBI to see if they could freaking understand why you simply appeared in Quantico? Didn't sound like a bad idea in your mind as you decided to just try it out. After all, you were already pretty screwed up, it would worth a shot.

You reached for your back pocket, hoping that the money you shoved in there more than a week ago would still be in there. Bingo! You pull out a 20 dollar bill out of it and the next thing you know you’re getting into a cab asking him to take you to the FBI. Now that’s something you never thought would happen. The travel was quite quick, in 20 minutos you were standing in front of that big isolated building. It looked like it was taken straight out of your favorite show, that was insane. 

The wind blew hard on you when you got out of the vehicle, making you shiver a little, that reminded you that you did not have any clothes nor money to buy more. God, you did not even have where to go. You didn't even get the chance to get into the building as a big man steps in front of you, blocking your way. 

“Miss, you're not allowed in this building.” he said without much expression. 

“But, sir-” you started, as you saw he was about to interrupt you, you go on. “Ive been abducted and I don't know where or how the hell did I get in here, I’m completely hopeless... Please.” you beg him.

He started at you for a couple of seconds, that felt like centuries for you, just to sigh at you.

“Ok, follow me.” he said. “Do not make me regret this.” 

“I-I won’t, sir.” you were quick to answer. 

The agent asked another man to cover up for him as he led me into the building. Once again you found yourself admired of how much it did look like a Criminal Minds episode in there, if you weren't totally desperate you'd be amused. Soon, you two were out of the elevator on floor 8, leading with the words Behavior Analysis Unit quite big. 

“Can you take her to Agent Jareau, please?” the man said to someone who passed by, who simply agreed. 

Now, that's a funny coincidence, there's actually an Agent Jareau in the BAU. 

You followed the woman with questioning trying to stay calm when you saw Matthew Gray Gubler sitting on a desk reading some book in Reid style, almost like he was Spencer himself. If you had any doubts you were going crazy, that was the final proof. You stoped walking, taking a stare at him and then at the Agent that stared a you like you were an alien.

“Is there something wrong?” she asks you. “Miss, are you ok?”

You were unable to answer for a few seconds when you finally opened you mouth, still trying to figure it out how to say what was on your mind without sounding completely insane.

“Is that Dr. Spencer Reid?” 

And that was all you’re able to say because as soon as you let his name out of your mouth he looked up at you, trying to somehow recognize you. You were sure, that time, that you never looked - and sounded - as insane as right now. 

“Yes, that's me.” he answers. 

His voice was the last thing you could hear before everything go black. Maybe you were finally going to wake up. Maybe. 

[foryouthegays]

First Meeting [Dream SMP] liveblog and summary w/ timestamps lets gooo

(Time taken: 1:58:56)

(Words: 1,235)

Enjoy!

Summary:

Techno starts the stream in his house. He talks to chat and about the stream, and eventually starts talking to Phil. They go over the Syndicate book and make some copies. While finding chickens, Niki asks Techno where he is, and says she wants to meet with him. Techno tells her to “follow the suspicious compass.” After a few minutes, she finds their house, and is invited inside. She reads the book and agrees to join the Syndicate.

While talking, Techno spots Ranboo spying on them, and goes outside to ask what he’s doing. Techno asks how much Ranboo heard, and Niki asks if he’s not allowed to know.

Ranboo questions her logic and says that if you want to keep a secret, you really shouldn’t be going around asking if someone’s allowed to know something. Techno agrees, and decides to ask Ranboo if he wants to join the Syndicate. He agrees.

After a few minutes of talking, and a quick sellout timer, they bring Ranboo and Niki to the lava pool, and Phil jumps in. It’s the new way to the meeting room, and a trust test. They go the the meeting room, which looks amazing, and start their first meeting with discussion about The Egg.

Techno says that he’ll talk to people and learn more about the Egg. He starts talking about a new government forming to the West of L’Manburg. They agree to investigate the rumors.

Before they leave, Ranboo reveals that Tommy died, to mixed reactions. Techno’s indifferent at worst, excited at best, and the others are in denial, and need to see a body to believe it.

They leave to go to Snowchester, and start talking to Tubbo. After some conversation, they agree that Snowchester isn’t a government, and Tubbo invites them to see his crater. They’re impressed, and say that they’ll call him if they ever need to kill a god. They go back to Snowchester and the prison, and Techno breaks part of the roof for fun.

Eventually, they make it back home. They tear down the dirt fortress in front of their yard, and then Techno ends the stream.

Times of Note (loreish):

3:45 Phil joins the call

7:00 he shows the updated Syndicate book, which reads:

This Syndicate is formed to serve as a network for fellow Anarchists to meet, exchange information, and cooperate in the mutual pursuit of Anarchy and the fight against Tyranny.

We shall have no Leader; no Member shall be compelled to act against their will. No Member shall reveal information about the Syndicate to outsiders.

Technoblade shall serve as the Recruiter to induce new Members into the Syndicate with Approval from a majority of Members.

14:20 Niki asks where Techno is.

16:20 Niki shows up at their door and joins the call.

20:40 Ranboo is spotted spying on them.

34:20 they start bringing Ranboo and Niki to the meeting room.

36:50 syndicate room reveal

37:40 he shows their code names, which are

Technoblade - Protesilalus

Phil - Zephyrus

??? - Harpocrates

48:15 Ranboo reveals that Tommy is dead.

Times of Note (just bc fun lmao):

1:30, 2:02, 2:07 he clap :]

22:09 a deep friendship :) aww thank you! That was adorable

26:45 ‘reblog’ techno r. R u on tumblr technoblade

30:50, 1:00:50, 1:33:30 Sellout timer my beloved

Tubbo dies 6 times before he manages to say that someone trapped him im gonna cry this is amazing

1:03:53 Du du duuu

1:07:05 TECHNOLAUGH TECHNOLAUGH TECHNOLAUGH!!!!

1:23:55 2 4 6. 8 who do we appreciate not the government yeahh

1:33:40 technosneeze?

Liveblog:

Startinggg the streammm my beloved

1:15 ‘well at least im gonna get valuable feedback from my chat, lets see what theyre saying. Late, late, late late late, late’ GOD ive missed his humor

3:45 philza minecraft philza minecraft philza minecraft

Techno has 6 mil subscribers and still doesnt know how to stream. I love him <3

6:00 ah yes, fences, the best way to stop snow

7:00 syndicate book my beloved

7:35 ‘when you have to do a group project in school, do you form a temporary government to get it done?’ S;ALKSDJFALKSDFJA technoblade my beloved

8:20 ‘listen, my high school understandin’ of philosophy will easily defeat the average viewers middle school understandin’’ FGHSKJDLA love he

Techno n philzas interactions r just. So good

16:20 NIKI!!!!!!! Oh my gosh he just closes the door in her face im gkjfhsdla

17:05 ‘im not a fool, im not a foolish fool who doesnt test things before he does them on stream’ love he

17:35 was v sir billiam voice

God technos humor is just. 10/10

Currently obsessed w how in canon niki is like, probably a bit scared of techno n then she goes over there and hes like. Do u think i can bring steve to the syndicate like his image is SO different from how he acts in the arctic i love it

22:55 ‘i would NEVER hurt another human being’ mhm sure techno

Mmmm technos voice when he starts asking people bout anarchy my beloved

Techno rlly does just say things doesnt he. Like i say that abt tommy a lot but techno just. Does he think? Yes. Does he just ramble abt whatever he wants? Also yes

13:10 Obsessed w how fast he ran when the sellout timer went off

32:05 BIG fan of this dono, it’s from J.J.M. Nobody for 50$ and it says ‘You know a hero once associated with pigs lead an army against tyranny.In fact he was supposed to be immortal, if he didnt commit a grevious sin. It made the voice in his head leave him to die. You wouldnt know anything about that?right Tydeus?’

Also i love how technos horrible upload/stream schedule is just him hibernating in canon

36:50 YOOOO THE SYNDICATE ROOM LOOKS SO GOOD

39:28 guys what if i stole phils code name and made it zephyris instead of zephyrus /hj (also who do yall think Harpocrates is?)

Obsessed w how obvious technos trying to make it that theyre not the good guys like the symbol being a wither? The room being all dark n stuff? They have to get in through l a v a? Love it. 10/10 would join

41:15 ‘its a meetin’ room, lets have our first meeting. So, uh, what the fuck is up with the egg, dude?’ GJKHDFSL phil is so good

42:05 OBSESSED with how, canonically, the egg wasnt able to take hold of techno or ranboo bc their heads r already so full of voices

44:10 the TIMING of tubbo dying when theyre talkin bout his place is hilarious

48:25 ‘dream..beat him to death’ ‘yoooo thats a pog’ GDHJKFL TECHNOBLADE

1:02:20 POTATO ROOM SELLOUT LETS GOOOO

1:07:05 HE LAUGH!!!!!! HE LAUGH!! ! ! !

Techno making fun of tubbos tunnel is so good im gonna cry ‘if i were to give any constructive criticism id say that your tunnel SUCKS’ (1:07:50)

1:21:20 why is ther ejust. A random piston ;akdjlafja

[wsgeon]

hey everyone! ummm this is peyton (also the mun of lee hyeon) taking a second shot at a second character — i have a lot of muse for this one, so i swear he’ll be around for a while… 🥵 this is ryu geon, yes his name rhymes with hyeon’s & no i do not care ♥️ he’s the lead guitarist/vocalist of meta and also the son of a former nobody rockstar, but i’ll get into all that below! like this post if you’d like for me to come into your ims to plot, click the read more for more info on geon, and/or click here to be taken to his pages: CAREER, DOSSIER, PINTEREST.

HISTORY.

born in autumn ‘97 to a “budding rockstar” (translation: “no yeah i swear our band’s really starting to take off, we sold twenty-three tickets to our last show!”) & a woman with commitment issues ♥️ geon’s dad always told him that his mom left because she had some dire matters that needed to be taken care of and SWORE that she cried the last time she held her dear baby boy, but all of his dad’s bandmates say that she was just some groupie and had to be persuaded into carrying her child to term… who can say for sure?

naturally, there are no pictures of this mystery woman. there was one (1) of her holding infant geon, but then he found out that that was actually a sound tech who worked for his dad’s band… and he just never corrected geon’s assumptions LOLLLL

anyway! he was always really close to his dad, considering they were a two-person family. he has a set of grandparents, an aunt and a couple cousins but they were never involved with geon’s life because his dad is the #blacksheep of the family. geon and his dad against the world, am i right?

uhhh geon was also kind of a black sheep growing up, but he didn’t really notice? he was a happy kid, very energetic and enthusiastic. a lot of adults in the area looked down on him & his dad, but he was SOOOO blind to it because his dad’s a god in his eyes and HE’S always been nice to everyone, so why would they not like him??? because his clothes smelled a little like dad’s cigarette smoke??? big deal

wasn’t troublesome (beyond talking too much), but a lot of people still expected bad things from him :/ “his father’s a dirtbag, i’ll be surprised if that boy doesn’t end up in jail by 20”, “he won’t amount to anything without a proper role model in his life”, “his dad is teaching him how to slack off”, “he won’t contribute anything to society”, etc. he kindaaa picked up on this as he got older but pretended not to because it was more rewarding to play dumb and keep being a good kid(tm) to prove them wrong

was basically a mini version of his dad. same style, similar features, birthmarks in the same places, same “live today, die tomorrow” approach in life, same affinity for singing & playing rock music. ummm he loved his dad a lot. a lot. a lot. wanted to make him proud SO BAD, started his first band when he was 15 and they sucked so bad but his dad was their biggest fan… you know how it is. a lot of people misunderstood him, but he was a very good guy and such a great parent

TW DEATH unfortunately he passed away just shy of geon’s 18th birthday and your boy still hasn’t forgiven the world for taking his dad when he was in the middle of his angsty teen phase — had he known that their time together was dwindling, he would’ve been so so so much better to him END TW

his dad’s band actually rocketed into the charts after he passed & suddenly they were getting loads of publicity, lots of “what a shame that he went under-appreciated” which pissed geon off SOOOO bad because why couldn’t they have had that energy when he was still alive? he’s still mad about it five/six years later

this is getting kinda long, so uhhh tl;dr, he ended up staying with the drummer of his dad’s band until he was old enough to live alone/READY to live alone, but he changed quite a bit. was really going through it, quit his band, stopped putting effort into school. barely graduated. went from being a social butterfly spending every weekend at a gig or with friends to spending all of his time on a pc or in front of a tv, playing console games. the internet comforted him when nobody else would/could and then he met the future members of meta <33333333 #newbeginnings

present day geon is still struggling, has to go to counseling bi-weekly but he’s coming back out of his shell! he wants to fall in love with life again, just wants to tread carefully... outgoing & will talk to absolutely anyone, but he still spends most of his time alone. hard to reach by text, so if you wanna talk to him, you better call/facetime LMAO. talks a mile a minute, especially if you get him going abt something he really likes. laughs a lot, smiles a lot, more habitual than actual signs of happiness but yk. ummm he has a really loud voice, mostly controlled nowadays but he still gets carried away sometimes. an absolute menace during long drives/flights, sorry meta.

funny but only when he’s in large groups. feeds off of other peoples’ energy, really good at reading a room and breaking the ice/making everyone comfortable, but if you meet him 1-on-1, none of his jokes land quite the same.

i envision him as being the kind of guy who carries himself in such a way that you’d assume he’s really popular/out of reach/maybe even full of himself, but he’s... not like that... at all... in fact, he’s kinda irritating when you get to know him. the personification of a flood followed by a drought and vice versa, always either too much or not enough. gets used/ghosted/dropped/dumped/whatever a lot because he’s soooo fun in the moment (if he isn’t in his feelings), but draining long-term.

really emotionally intelligent, in touch with his feelings in a way that a lot of people never thought he would be (probably thanks to counseling tbh). he’s very very rarely the type of person who will make you wonder what your place in his life is — he’s communicative, kind, honest. ummm he thinks that intimacy between friends needs to be more common, so he’s really affectionate with the people in his life. type of guy to tell you he loves you every chance he gets (calling you when he’s drunk, sounding like a clingy ex type beat) & greet you/depart with a hug. losing his dad kinda fucked him up in the way that he won’t leave/hang up until his friends say “i love you” back, gets kinda (re: very) upset if he’s denied that and/or a hug.

TRIVIA.

has been playing the guitar “longer than he’s been walking” (not really, but he swears it’s true).

uhhh he really likes nail art, but he’s kinda hesitant in what he tries? mainly sticks to black polish (or other plain colors), but sometimes he’ll get little designs added in as well. mainly does it himself because he still doesn’t feel comfortable in salons... if his work looks bad, leave him alone <3 he’s trying

inspired by people like kurt cobain, nicky wire, yungblud, billie joe armstrong & damiano david in the fact that he’s not against wearing dresses or skirts on stage. doesn’t do it ALL the time, but often enough that it doesn’t go unnoticed. some people say that he does it for attention because he doesn’t dress like that elsewhere and tbh they’re probably kinda right

interested in history (only SOME... dinosaurs, ancient civilizations, specialized areas like the history of circuses/clowns/skateboarding/punk, stuff like that yk), stand-up comedy & documentaries. could spend a whole day watching documentaries and would say he had fun, has a lot of useless knowledge that nobody gives a fuck about and is kinda dumb when it comes to things that matter

when it comes to music, he prefers playing really fast and heavy rock or punk over anything else, but he actually listens to a lot more soft indie on his own time... he’s too tense these days to be listening to anything else RIPPP

the vibe: homemade tie-dye, ripped slipknot t-shirts, frosted tips, neon crocs with alien & peace-sign charms, chipped black nail polish, calloused hands, cheesy pick-up lines used NOT to land a date but to pull a smile, driving until he’s lost, stupid socks paired with pressed suits, dramatic poetry in an iphone note, etc. 

PLOT IDEAS.

people he met through online support groups about coping with grief

uhhh an on & off relationship that’s been going for who-knows-how-long. the reason for this is up for discussion, but i imagine that he hasn’t given up yet because the constant highs and lows are a good source of inspo 🤪 artists must suffer for their art!

opposite side of the coin — someone he’s interested in, but he’s NOT disloyal so it’s a pattern of persistent courting when he’s single vs intense friend-zoning when he’s not and they’re getting tired of trying to figure out what he wants from them

someone else who likes nail art & can convince him that NOBODY cares if he goes to a salon

someone (probably female but doesn’t really matter tbh) who feels like his feminism is entirely performative… maybe they attack him directly for it or maybe they just REALLY don’t like him and they’re super vague about it idk. either way, please tell him that activism is much more than recommending one female artist a year and saying “clothes have no gender 🤪” so he can be praised for the bare minimum (his heart is in the right place but his skull is empty)

someone super introverted who comes out of their shell with geon! uhhh maybe they think that he’s the one doing them a favor, but in reality spending time with them has been doing wonders for his mental health

other people who like to skate. let’s congregate at the local skatepark and scare the middle schoolers away

someone who inspires him musically, for whatever reason. lots of late nights in studios, idly strumming his guitar and writing lyrics that definitely aren’t about how their eyes look in these dim lights… umm maybe he thinks he has a crush on them but really doesn’t and ends up hurting them eventually, maybe he really DOES have a crush but will (probably) never do anything abt it or maybe it’s entirely platonic and he just admires them a ridiculous amount

someone who likes to make music as a hobby, prob won’t publish/release any of it but it’s fun to imagine. spontaneous meetings with geon in the middle of the night, recording songs together and keeping the WORST takes for the laughs. there’s probably a diss-track of them going in on each other floating around somewhere even though geon can’t rap for shit

night owls who keep him company on the phone, even if they can’t be there physically. them talking really quietly vs geon shouting at them while he plays games LMAO

gaming buddies. come over, maybe you can carry geon through his game of the week or you can both fail but have fun while you’re at it… or you can scream while he fends off that hoard of zombies behind you

i’m typing this at the last minute (literally) so i’m gonna stop here, but i will get a proper plots page put up asap with a wider variety of connections!!! but as always, please do let me know if you have any other ideas. i’m always happy to plot and write with you all 🌚

[an0nymousghost]

simblr asks v2

here are my answers! find the questions here.

i wrote soo much ahaha. like however much you think i wrote, i wrote more than that. imo everything i write is gold though

1. are you going to buy the new pack (cottage living) when it comes out? no, it looks really nice but i legit never ever buy packs at launch, especially cause this one is a expansion and it will probably go on sale at some point

2. do you p*rate your dlc or buy it legitimately? buy it legitimately 👌

3. what’s your favorite world? brindleton bay, it gives like seaside cottage vibes. willow creek is good but it’s boring. 

4. if you use a queue, how many posts per day do you set it as? 3 or 4. i used to do like 12 lmaoo what even was wrong with me

5. do you watch sims on youtube? yes, i watch mainly malixa, oshinsims, and msgryphi

6. what are your thoughts on the most recent pack? (dream home decorator) those sectional couches look good! but honestly im kinda annoyed because now it’s even harder to have all the items filled in when i place lots from the gallery. like i’m just saying like a lot of builds will use that pack probably and if i don’t get it then i can’t really use builds/save files 

7. how many packs/kits do you own? lemme count

expansion: all - 10/10 game: 5/10 stuff: 9/18 kits: none xo

24/38 - 63%

8. what’s your origin id? is it the same as your url? 🤗 it’s in my title, it’s celeschul. it doesn’t look that nice in my title but i use celeschul in my package files and i’m guessing people search things like, “celeschul penny hair” or something like that in order to find my cc- so i keep it in there so the search results are easier. i do want to change it though..

but no it’s also not the same! well i mean it’s the username i use for cc. my origin id used to be an0nymousghost but i changed it. i wonder if anyone’s taken that one?

9. is your simblr your sideblog or main blog? main blog ✌️ my old blog @stardze​ is a main blog as well.

my old old simblr was a sideblog but it had like 1 follower and it literally a bot so i don’t think that counts. i have a multifandom sideblog though 

10. do you have a cc finds blog? i wish. i was thinking bout it earlier and that would be sooo neat but sometimes i download stuff that doesn’t have a tumblr post attached to it, and also it’s stressful to keep up with so nah

11. are you wcif friendly? yes sir. in fact i bring the trouble of wcifs onto myself but doing them even when nobody asked.

12. what’s your favorite sized household to play with? (ex. 1 sim, 4 sims) gonna have to think on this one, honestly 1 sim is really fun and stuff goes by so fast. doing stuff with astrid when she was on her own, it was much more efficient. 

for families, i haven’t done that in a while actually. 5, 2 parents and 3 kids is cute tho. why did i write this this is honestly such a hard question

13. if you have c&d, do you play with pets? i feel like i haven’t played with cats and dogs in forever. honestly i just have no paitence. noelle fae was supposed to get a cat (there’s a food bowl + cat bed in her house) but when summer vacation started, the amount of time i spent playing ts4 decreased a lot. (this doesn’t really make sense, i have a lot more time. honestly it just has to do with my recent obsession with a certain anime/manga and some other personal thing)

i did random nightmares in may though and i had pets frequently. g5 didn’t because sofia scarlett lived in an apartment, but g2/3/4 had cici, and g1 had all the cats. but that was back in march so it’s been a while.

14. what lifespan do you use? i really want to do aging off but then i feel like it drags on. but aging legit stresses me out, sometimes i just want to sit down and do some cas stuff but i only have 2 hours in real time and there’s like 4 days left till one of my sims’ birthdays. 

15. if you own a lot of packs, how many of them have you actually played through? just so everyone is aware this question was made for me

i feel like eps require a specific save made for testing them out, but the only save i’ve ever made for an ep is noelle fae’s get famous save. 

that is literally a lie - i made a save for island living with one of my 100bc kids, maisie acapella. i did actually post it on tumblr BUT then i deleted all the posts BUT i reblogged them on my alt account BUT i privated my alt account so i honestly forgot about it

i have never played through discover university or watched anyone do it on youtube, i’ve read gerbits’ story about it so i think i’m pretty qualified. i’ve always wanted to do one with periwinkle acapella but i never got around to it

another ep i know nothing about is get to work

i tried doing a eco life playthrough but i hadn’t watched any videos and i was like..what is going on. so i quit lolx d ;;;;; i mentioned it but the whimsy stories legacy was the first time i had played with the eco lifestyle features so technically i think i know what im doing

i got outdoor retreat literally on monday of this week so i haven’t played through it yet. 

jungle adventure i still don’t know what’s going on. i remember last year before i bought the pack i was brainstorming, and wanted to do a ja playthrough with luna and cedar, who are a couple who i did a random legacy with and it was all queued to post when i deleted everything (if you’re wondering why, it’s because my queue was literally 200+ posts). except this time i didn’t save them to my sideblog so i lost them. 

i still havent had a restaurant in dine out 

also never did the vet thing from cats and dogs

i have no idea what that rock climbing thing is from snowy escape but i did most of the other stuff because rn g5

city living i did through psc stage 5 and also it was the first pack i bought anyways

the rest of them are either stuff packs or i ended up playing them through casual gameplay (seasons, parenthood)

16. what do you do as you play sims? (ex. listen to music) i listen to music most of the time, or listen to commentary youtube videos because i am an alpha chad. i also used to talk with my friends on voice call but i don’t do that anymore 🥲

17. which sims challenges have you tried? random legacy, whimsy stories, perfect sim challenge, 100 baby, legacy (just the plain get-to-10-gens one), random nightmares, berry zodiac, astrology legacy, apocalypse

i feel like im forgetting some.. honestly most of the stuff i did before simblr was either 100 baby (i love that challenge) or random saves that lasted for 2 seconds. 

18. do you like the new(ish) hair swatches? nah. 

i do appreciate that most cc hairs have a true (ish) black, thank god! and the fact that the hair update is what inspired me to update and fix a bunch of hairs with different issues is pretty nice. but will i use them? no. 

plus it takes up like 5 gb? depending on how many packs you have.

19. post the latest screenshot you took 📸

i live in cas

20. what is the cc/ingame hair that looks the most like your own? i think that dream home decorator side part hair looks a lot like my hair. honestly i havent see much like my hair but that one is kinda-? close

21. who is your favorite sim of yours and what is their story? noelle and alari fae i think! 

link to post

noelle is blonde and has blue-grey eyes. she wears purple contacts pretty often though (because she wants to 😌)

alari has light brown hair that is kinda curly, and she’s got pretty vibrant blue eyes. 

they’re sisters, alari is 3 years older than noelle. noelle was 19 and alari was 22 when they got spotted

they worked as models when they were young adults. their jobs involved dyeing their hair blue/pink, and they would model like clothes and stuff. anyways, they were pretty successful. like not ultra famous but they had enough money to not work for the rest of their lives. 

their modeling group was made of 4 girls, the others were named paisley autumn and they were green and red, respectively. some things are: 

paisley and alari started dating during this 

autumn was a single mother to a little girl named destiny

noelle dated many people during this but never ended up finding the one <3

when their contract ended after like 6 years, paisley and alari went to go live together and noelle decided to get into acting. so thats when get famous playthrough started!

there’s more but basically they’re like oc’s with sims on the side. xoxo

22. if you use cc, are there any cc creators that you have like ALL of their items? this is such a good question! i hoard hair very heavily (my folder is 11gb) i so i have like 97% from most of the popular hair creators. 

i think i had legitimately EVERYTHING from simstrouble though, i went through multiple times to check and i also have all of her retired stuff. 

i have everything from ridgeport i think-? because of the fact that she uploaded all her stuff in one big zip. 

i think that’s it.. for a long time i also had everything by clumsyalienn, but then i ended up deleting it and only keeping my faves. 

and looking at my collection, maybe ah00b? i might be missing a couple but i at least have like 99%.

23. what’s one pack you think is underrated? dine out, it’s laggy af yes but it’s such a nice thing for my sims to do. 

24. what are your favorite sims stories/legacies? melons by gerbits always and forever

this question was inspired by this ask anyways so 

25. if you could change one small thing about ts4, what would it be? most of my suggestions are pretty complex but literally just - when you add tray files, they appear at the top. my life would be so much easier

this took me literal hours to answer

[flawnle]

My brain decided to have angst for my weird au thing. Feel free to ignore if you want nothing to do with it.

-[START]-

Dmitri spotted the fucker, the one who’s been messing up his prison. He gives chase, just barely keeping the person in sight as he followed. They make a right turn. He knew this would lead to a dead end. Dmitri slides into the hallway ready to confront them but instead sees someone a bit more familiar.

Wallace, his son, was standing around where the person he was chasing should be. He seemed unbothered. Like someone hadn’t just ran by. He noticed Dmitri and greeted him with a wave.

“Uh, hey kid. Did you happen to see a person run past here? I’ve been chasing them down and I’m sure I saw them run in here!”

Dmitri says quickly. Not wanting to risk the person who’s been running his place to the ground getting away. Wallace just looked confused.

“I didn’t see anyone sorry.. maybe they went the other way?”

“Im sure I saw them run in here kid. My eyesight is perfectly fine.”

“Well I honestly saw nobody.”

Dmitri groaned in annoyance. Looking down the other hallway.

“Maybe they went the other way... I can still catch them!”

He was about to go off again but Wallace stoped him.

“Actually I wanted to talk to you for a second.”

“Wallace. I really got to go after this guy..”

“They are probably gone by now, they’ll be back eventually. Next time you can get all of us to help conner them property.”

Dmitri thought for a second. The guy will indeed come back, he doesn’t seem to have finished his job.

“.. fine. What did you want to talk about kid?”

“Well it’s just I’ve realized I haven’t exactly been completely honest with you about some things..”

He said nervously. Wallace figgeted with his bracelet. Dmitri raised his eyebrows in a bit of surprise. Out of all the topics he thought Wallace was going to go to he never expected that.

“Well whatever it is I won’t be mad at you. Just explain alright? How many things are we talking about here?”

“O-only two..”

“What’s the first thing?”

“... it’s about my nightmares.”

Dmitri sighed. He knew how bad Wallace’s nightmares were, plus the fact he’s been dealing them them for about 20 years. He didn’t know much about them asside from the one time he found Wallace crying when he woke up. That was also the time he found out he had nightmares to begin with.

“What about them? Have they gotten worse or something?”

“Not exactly..”

Wallace looked Dmitri in the eyes as two lengthy looking figures rose from his shadow. Their faces looked the same, eyes not seemed to exist. They scared down at Dmitri. He took a step back.

“These... are my nightmares..”

“Kid I don’t know what to tell you but, nightmares are dreams. They don’t come out like that physically! It’s like some sort of cryptid shit!”

“I can’t expect you to believe me.. but I’m telling the truth, these things are the stuff that make my nightmares what they are.”

“May we speak now..? Speak now..?”

Wallace shot the two a look after one of them spoke. Their echoing voices seemed to bounce off walls that didn’t exist.

“Not yet.”

“... did that thing just ask you permission to speak??”

“Y-yeah... one day they just decided to leave me a alone and start listening to what I tell them too. They said I wasn’t worth the trouble if I was already this far gone.”

Wallace’s words confused Dmitri. What does he mean by ‘this far gone’? As far as he knew Wallace was the same as he has been since the day he came to the wall.

“Kid.. what are you talking about?”

“You wouldn’t notice the difference... it’s been like this for awhile...”

He gave a small nod to the creatures. They move forward a bit to speak.

“About 3-4 years to be exact~ be exact~”

“What..?”

Dmitri was stunned. How could this be happening for years when he’s seen how these very nightmares effected Wallace first hand. Then a new thought crossed his mind. Could Wallace had faked that? Pretended the nightmares effected him the way it did when that wasn’t the case? He shook his head slightly, getting rid of the thought. Wallace wouldn’t fake something like that, he had no reason to. He trusts his son.

“Is something wrong? Something wrong?”

“Yeah, your fuckin voices.”

“That’s enough guys..”

The two returned back to Wallace’s side after he spoke.

“I’m sorry for not mentioning them before, there never really was a good time for me to tell you..”

“It’s fine kid. That was then, this is now.”

“Thanks.. there still the other thing though..”

Dmitri almost forgot about that. Seeing the two creatures made him lose track of the fact wallce said there was two things, not just one.

“We’ll go ahead. Surely it can’t get weirder then you having cryptids at your command.”

“If your sure..”

Those words from Wallace made Dmitri nervous. The figures seemed to smirk, as if they knew what was to come.

“... I’m still a tophat.”

He said simply. After he spoke his posture changed. Dmitri couldn’t tell how though, he was more focused on his words.

“You.. WHAT?! Your still a tophat? Why didn’t you tell me sooner!”

“I didn’t think it was necessary. I’m still actively working here. It just made it easier to say I didn’t work with them anymore. But I feel the need to come clean about it.”

“Kid, you really should have told me. We have an alliance with them, it doesn’t matter if you are or aren’t one.”

“... I know.”

“He just didn’t want to~ want to~”

Wallace nodded at what the figure said. Dmitri finally figured out what was different. Wallacw was standing more straight, as if more professional. He didn’t like the implications of that.

“Didn’t want to..?”

“Exactly! Like Wally boy said, it was unnecessary, so why bother? Besides, he didn’t want to ruin what you thought of him. Of him.”

“Is this true?”

Dmitri asked. Now more on edge, there’s something off about all this. Wallace was still hiding something, he just knew it. And god be dammed if he didn’t find out what.

“Of course it is. They wouldn’t lie, at lest not to you. They’d only really try to lie to me.”

“I wouldn’t have thought any less of you if I knew Wallace..”

“I know, I know. I didn’t know then but I do now. That’s why I’m telling you.”

“And that’s it? That’s all you wanted to tell me?”

“Pretty much, yeah..”

Wallace started acting a bit more like one he knew. But Dmitri planned on finding out more.

“.. who exactly were you chasing just now..?”

The question caught him off guard, he was about to say something before Wallace did. But Dmitri composed himself, trying not to let Wallace know he knew something was up.

“Just the fucker that decided they could march on in here and try to sabotage my complex..”

He says with a growl. Wallace seemed to think for a second.

“Oooohhhh THATS who you were after! I know who that is.”

“Wh-what!? Yow KNOW!? Why didn’t you tell me!”

“Why wouldn’t I know who I am?”

“Wha- that’s not what I-“

Dmitri’s voice trails off his gaze matched Wallace’s as realization sank in. He smirked as he saw Dmitri’s expression.

“You.. you..”

“Come on now Dmitri. You can say it.”

“Your the one who’s been sabotaging the wall..”

His voice was shaky. Dmitri couldn’t believe it. How could he? His own son, the one who he was thinking of possibly handing the wall over to, is the one who’s been setting it up to fail. A look of satisfaction rested on Wallace’s face.

“There you go. I’m surprised it look having to say it outright for you to realize~”

Everything about Wallace changed. How he stood, how he spoke, it was startling. It was like someone flipped a switch in him. But for some reason, Dmitri got the feeling he was finally meeting the real Wallace Pemberton.

“Why..? Why would you..?”

“Sabotage the wall? It was my duty. I wasn’t just a spy, my job was to break everyone out, and I was going so slowly but surely, by taking the wall down completely..”

“But there’s a-“

“An alliance, I know. The reason’s quite simple. You were too late. The plan was too far into motion. I can’t reverse it now, so why should I stop? Might as well go all in.”

Wallace smirked once again, the nightmares behind him smirked as well. He was scary. Dmitri backed up, wanting to try to run. He couldn’t kill Wallace, he’s his son for gods sake! So his only option was to get out of there.

“And where do you think YOUR going? Your going?”

Wallaces voice mixed with the nightmares. It startled Dmitri so much he froze in place. The one of the nightmares take the opportunity to come up behind him. Stoping his attempt of escape. Wallace’s a kind of “tsk tsk tsk” sound, like he was about to scold a child.

“What made you think I’d just let you leave? There’s still some stuff I want to say~ don’t you know it’s rude to leave a conversation early?”

“...”

“Good to know your smart enough to know when to shut up.”

The nightmares laughed a bit at that. The echoing laughter made Dmitri’s head hurt.

“You know, I was planning on waiting until you give me the wall before I revealed myself. But I’ll admit, I made an amateur mistake, I fumbled. You caught on end it was either I show myself willingly, or you find out in... a situation I wouldn’t find favorable.”

“You didn’t want to be ambushed..”

“Exactly! I’m glad you understand. I always knew there was some kind of brain in that hollow skull of yours~”

“...”

Wallace looked at Dmitri. Raising an eyebrow in amusement at his expression of confusion and betrayal.

“I get why your so quiet now. Your betrayed, backstabbed, by the man you concidered your son. Confused as to why, how, I could possibly do such a thing.”

“I thought you cared..”

Wallace freezes at that. Maybe he’s feeling some form of remorse? Gult? He knew the answer almost immediately after those thoughts, because Wallace started laughing. Similar to the laugh of the nightmares. He was laughing at him, absolutely losing it. It seemed like Wallace tried to compose himself after his laughing fit.

“You.. you really thought-“

It’s hard for him to speak through his giggles.

“You really thought I cared! Haha! That’s the funniest thing I’ve heard! YOU THOUGHT I CARED ABOUT YOU!”

Dmitri flinched. This was his son, his son who never cared.

“I CANT BELIEVE IT! Why would I care for a sorry old man like you!? Your a useless waist of a man who can’t even lay a finger on the person who betrayed you. All because I’m your ‘son’ “

He put son in air quotes. Cackling here and there.

“Oh Dmitri how far you’ve fallen. You’ve made my job so much easier! I was going to kill you here and now but now I don’t want to anymore.”

“Wh-what..?”

“I think I’d rather see you SUFFER. I want to watch the pain in your face as you watch your son ruin the one place you call home. The place you’ve spent your life keeping together. IM GOING TO RIP IT TO SHREADS! And you won’t do anything about it.”

Dmitri started to shake, he was actually scared of Wallace. And he knew he wouldn’t do anything to him. He couldn’t, it’d break him to put Wallace in harms way, even if he’s betrayed him.

“Your.. your a monster..”

“Oh how you flatter me. Monster is such a tame word to call me.”

He chuckled, his eyes glancing to a clock on the wall. Wallace’s expression turned into a sickly sweet smile. The nightmares disappearing.

“Sorry to cut this short.. but I have a very appointment to get to. I’ll see you again I’m sure of it.”

“...”

Dmitri watched Wallace walk away cheerfully, like nothing ever happened. He was at a loss for words. He collapsed on the ground, taking a few deep breaths, as it felt like he wasn’t breathing.

He couldn’t believe what just happened, but he had to. Dmitri couldn’t do anything but prepare for his pain. As much as he wanted to stop Wallace, he couldn’t do it. And so Dmitri walks somberly back to his office.

-[End]-

[irkenheretic]

okay i promised id do it and im doing it: Explaining The Plot Of That AU I’m Vague About: The Post

(as i was preparing to write this i actually got my 250th follower, which slapped)

so i’m just gonna start with the simple version, which is this: it’s a rebel AU which primarily centers around the tallest, who are both defective. they give up on trying to make any meaningful changes as figureheads, and instead direct their attention to being involved with the “neo defect revolution,” or NDR. they do manage to make one change as tallest- there is a garbage dump planet turned into a sanctuary for defectives (who in this au are executed once discovered,) and eventually enough of the populace finds out about it that the tallest have to deal with it. they finesse their way into kicking it out of the empire, so now it’s its own planet with its own rules, governments, and most importantly, immigration policies and protections

a lot of stuff happens and it’s gonna be structured using arcs, and each arc has a separate protagonist/deuteragonist/tritagonist lineup (but that doesnt mean the same lineup won’t be used multiple times!) and yes the insane list of OCs are for this au alone: some arcs are very OC-centric, some have OCs as supporting characters, and a couple are all-OC or mostly-OC. 

its going to be very longform and it’ll span from the tallest’s elite training days to twenty years after zim arrives on earth. (the 20 year gap btwn zim arriving on earth and the story proper isnt as tightly plotted as later tho.) the point is to see how a revolution on the scale of the NDR works, who was fucked over by defact laws, who was fucked over by other laws, etc. theres a lot of lore and a lot of headcanons i made for this AU and even a conlang. i am a being of hubris. itll be a series of fics, some multichapter and some oneshots. 

the series as a whole is gonna be called Invader Zim: Annexed or just Annexed for short. its a pun on an irken word that sounds similar but means the exact opposite. i am not explaining more bc itll be explained in the fic itself. but thats why the tag for it is #anx lmao

i didnt mean for this to be as long as it got but under the cut im gonna breakdown some of the early arcs:

so it all starts with a fanfic called Love Is The H-Word (no the “h-word” isn’t “hell.) it centers around red and purple as elites-in-training, who do a little whoopsie and have an egg. purple doesnt wanna smuggle it into a smeetery, bc then he’ll never see it again, so they go to the defect sanctuary (still a part of the empire at this point.) purple knows he’s defective while red has a hard time accepting that he is as well, due to events from his past. but being around all these other defects are starting to wear down his denial, and the fic is all about that. it also sets up some plot stuff, like how defects adopted a self-identifier in the word “heretic,” hence the sanctuary being named, “heretirk.” (hey look my url!) (no, the “h-word” is not heretic, either.) 

i dont wanna say what happens in that fic bc spoilers, but stuff Happens. its also when we meet some ocs that end up being important, and the existence of others are foreshadowed. this is also where we meet the tallests’ future advisor, rarl kove, for the first time, as a local who decides to keep them company. purple bonds with kove due to their shared interest in politics, while red reluctantly bonds with titch, a young irken (a smeet in heretirken standards, an adult in imperial standards- did i mention he and red are roughly the same age? lol) who is interested in military stuff and thrill-seeking and general destruction. titch is pissed because he claims his father is stealthing on devastis as a military commander, but won’t let titch sneak in as a soldier, as titch is deaf. 

(fun facts: in the au, “titch” is regional slang for “a little bit.” ironically, titch the character is above-average in height.)

due to titch’s deafness, he developed “gesturespeak,” irken sign language, so he can communicate. this existing becomes important later

a oneshot called invade the system is right after h-word in publishing order. it details zim’s exploits in leaving foodcourtia, where he was assigned and infiltrating the invading academy he eventually graduates from (in this au, zim is too short to be an invader, which sucks because the hight minimums for the military are really short to begin with lmao)

the fic chronoligically after H-Word focuses on red and purple being back in their platoon on devastis, specifically red navigating his training and his relationships with two defective platoonmates, pon and zi (who are in h-word a little,) after the realization that he too is defective. it also focuses on how the irken military works, and how they train their soldiers. 

the first arc overall focuses on red and purple going thru training and such, and ends after they graduate and are on the field, working to get commander rank. (they planned to gain commander rank then leave and go back to heretirk to train an army there, as heretirk has.... no army.) in the middle of this, they’re pulled out and told they are to become the next tallest. they debate over staying and taking the job or just running to heretirk, and they ultimately decide to stay.

the next arc i call the “bridge,” tbh. its less tightly plotted than the other arcs; fics are spread apart from each other chronologically and all that. it spans the time after the tallest being appointed to a little after zim arrives on earth. it also has a couple of anthologies focusing on imperial defects- each chapter is a new character. these guys are all important and the easiest way for me to introduce their backstories without cluttering everything up is anthology style, lmao. other things that happen are a look into how the tallest work, eventually culminating with the resolution of the tallest having to Deal With Heretirk, tenn’s rescue from meekrob, and zim on earth obtaining a half-irken smeet named pip due to stealing an Unethical Science Experiment from dib (which is pip.) the bridge is basically just. “heres some stuff that happens between point A and point B so when we get to point B you’re not confused as all hell.” 

the next arc focuses on zim. in the first fic, pip is sick and zim is trying to get into his neighbor’s pants, to cope. this basically sets up that zim in this au has no idea how to find personal fulfillment in living- he’s only OK if he focuses on pleasing someone else, be it taking care of pip or doting on the neighbor, some rando human named piqu (pronounced, “peek.”) this is mainly a cute romance story with the underlying veneer of “a child is slowly and painfully dying” in the background. fun! 

without spoiling the circumstances, zim and pip end up on heretirk, which at this point is its own independent planet. pip is in the hospital for most of it so zim has to do his own thing. computer fans rejoice bc hes basically zims dad at this point, who tells him to go outside and get some fresh air and talk to the locals instead of schmooping or screaming in anxiety. im sneakily introducing more characters like ini, the “next-gen zim;” a short bio-engineer (she works on PAKs) who was constantly passed over by everyone because they dont trust someone that short or they dont trust someone that spazzy, even though shes actually brilliant. also her brother mo, who’s a pilot that NOBODY will teach military-class ships to (at this point, HTK has a population of ex-military that had their old ships, but still no formal army) because he doesnt talk and they think hes “slow” as a result. for the curious, he is physically able to talk most times, he just doesnt like it. zim ends up teaching him how to fly military-class which ends up being important laterrr

(haha ini and mo. wheres meenie and minie? ILL GET TO THEM)

no really, theyre quadruplets. named ini, myni, minie, and mo. these are real characters. 

minie isnt introduced till later. shes too cool to be the side character in someone elses arc. she is feel uncomfortable when we are not about her.

myni is busy palling around with pip and pip’s friend “elly” (real name elevenn, with two N’s.) elly is a half-meekrob War Crime Baby and tenn’s smeet. he has vision problems (he can “see” energy signatures of things, as opposed to conventional sight. everything is monochrome and he has to really focus to see like, words on a paper. also fuck tablets) but the trade-up is telekinetic powers (that he cant use too much or his brain will melt. fun!) this isnt relevant until the arc AFTER zim’s, where they end up poking around a historical site due to myni’s interest in that kind of thing, and they find logs of an old revolution (that was actually pretty successful in their goal, before they were caught and executed,) that lead them to a man named lefy. he helps with revolutions and helped these guys, and the trio go to seek him out; myni because he wants to impress his parents with helping them, pip because after they’ve recovered enough to walk around and do stuff, feel like they need to justify the choice to save their life and make their dad proud and all that, elly because he doesnt want pip to get hurt and die. And thats where the stuff REALLY starts happening and i cant tell u more sorry

this seemed kind of disjointed but thats bc i cant really be too detailed otherwise id like.... spoil it lmfao. but thats the summary of the first few arcs.

[slurmware]

please tell me your headcanons for the planet express crew !! im a relatively new follower and want to know ^^ lgbt+, neurodivergencies, anything !!!

HI ANON I AM SO SORRY THIS HAS BEEN IN MY INBOX FOR LIKE 20 YEARS HDJDKHFKG!!!!! FUCK IVE BEEN PUTTING THIS OFF

OK SO. im so glad u asked this cause i will Always be down to talk about futurama!!

fry:

fry has adhd!! and hes autistic :0 he has trouble expressing himself sometimes, like with how much he loves bender and leela. hes bi/pan!! and he has hella freckles. I like to draw him with curly hair sometimes and i hc his eyes are green! I'd also hc he has like pale eyelashes but i never draw them :( fry is touch starved (god same). hes always bouncing his leg. always gotta have some kind of distraction. I also like to draw him with ear piercings

leela:

ahh i love her so much!! leela is bi with a preference for guys. looks really good in a suit. she is BUFF YOU COWARDS!!! she canonically used to play drums which I think is super cool! maybe she plays them every once in a while nowadays, and fry likes to sit and listen. also I think the fact that she grows elbow talons is really cool? idk I know that's not a hc that's just a note lol. also she has a few ear piercings which I draw her with! she looks badass with them. I also think that her hair is naturally wavy, but she tends to straighten it.

bender: I wish his human version had actually been mexican (although with the professors machine, that might have just been the default. still WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE). i hc that he has a chip where his language can switch to spanish. also hes gayer than he thinks he is. especially when it comes to fry. honestly I think they could have kissed at least once in the series? and I think hes touch starved too, I know he gets a lot of action and w/e but i mean in a love way, not just a sex way, u know what I mean? like love touches. more platonic and romantic stuff. what im saying is that bender needs a hug

I dont have many hcs for the rest of the planex crew/main charas but ill give u what ive got!

i like to draw kif with scaly sort of freckles!! i think they look neat. also elbow talons like leela haha, and if i ever draw him from the knees up, I think he'd have spikes or talons of some sort from there too.

everyone loves zoidberg more than they care to admit, especially the professor. come on. they were at least a little gay. zoidberg was my fave before i realized how much i love fry! and he deserved better, but im glad he found the girl whose name escapes me who has no sense of smell.

hermes..... hermes is cool. i don't have many hcs about him I dont think. i love him tho. he might drink a lot of coffee

amy! amy is epic, and i hc that the professor treats her like a granddaughter. i think shes a lesbian tbh. science gay. her and leela? chefs kiss. kickass. (i also think trans girl or nonbinary kif is epic..)

and the professor. probably pan, gives no fucks, hail science and hail satan bro

fuck zapp i hate him. hes compensating greatly for something my dudes. his teeth are probably too white and i would like to kick him off a cliff <3 hes at least a little bit attracted to guys tho. that doesnt make him better but he is a little gay

BASICALLY nobody in futurama is straight and this is a fact. goodnight everyone

[sea-salted-wolverine]

Okay so last week was a shitkicker and was literally so bad I spent the better part of the week trying to delude myself into thinking it was a good day. Like, we're talking, "the sun is shining and I'm here to see it so today is a good day" and "I'm having a bad day- fuck me I am not haveing a bad day- I'm having a good day- I'm not having a bad day". Denial is a powerful tool for mental health, apply judiciously. I get that everyone on earth is kinda having a shitty year but it feels like things just kinda escalated in my little corner

The 7th had a huge snow storm that brought traffic to a stand still. No one could leave the house and university class was online anyway. Batshit customer demanded to pick up her gear anyway. I drove in because I was the only person with keys to the shop that could get to the building. It took me a solid 2 hours going 15mph on the highway. The snow in the parking lot was up past the fenders of my truck. Crazy lady gets 10 out of 18 of her survival suits back but the other 8 still have holes in them because our only repair tech is also the only one who answers the phone or runs the computer or handles customers or cleans or disinfects anything or stores gear. I'll give you one guess who that person is.

Did you guess me? Good for you. Fun fact this was not the case in October.

Crazy lady swans off through the snowed in parking lot and because she cant find the exit, blasts straight through the ditch and onto the road.

I say fuck it and leave. I've been at work for 2 hours. I have made 24 dollars for my trouble. It takes me another hour to get home.

The 8th is Saturday and I'm supposed to be at work. No one can drive. There was another 10 8nches of snow last night. I say fuck work and go to dig out the plow truck. The canopy over the plow truck collapses as I walk out to clear the snow of it.

I do not scream.

My partner and I get the truck running and go plow people out of their driveways and then go do the shop.

We come back home and the heater doesn't work. We just spent most of last week frantically trying to limp the thing along because no heat at -20°F is in a word fucking unpleasant. At least now its 40 degrees warmer because if the snowstorm. We take it apart again. The house smells like diesel. The house smells like exhaust. The house is not cold because the wood stove can keep up at 20 above zero but it won't keep us through the winter.

There is no saving the oil heater. We need a new one.

Its 730 and neither of us have eaten. I start rice in the pressure cooker so I can throw a tasty bite on top and call it dinner and that dies too. Explosively.

Dinner is half cooked rice and microwaved curry.

Sunday is spent finding a way to stretch our increasingly thin budget to buy a new heater. Between us we actually have 2275$ and we will still cover the mortgage. Somehow. All our Christmas gifts will be hand made this year. The next thing that breaks will stay broken.

Monday, power outages due to snow storm. No wifi, no zoom meetings. Another 8 inches of snow. This is now more snow than my city gets for the full year.

My boss calls sobbing. The dog died. Joey, an 11 year old, 130lb mastiff with a tumor the size of a football on his liver has been her constant companion for at least 8 years. The pandemic has confused the bejesus out of him because while he loves the lock down and going out to play every hour or so he doesnt really like the concept of strangers in masks. Hes a guard dog and doesnt understand that men in masks coming into the shop are not here to kill mom they're wearing masks so they don't kill mom.

Mondays the shop is closed anyway and I spend it installing the new heater. It doesn't quite fit in the space the old heater came out of but its warm.

Tuesday, I go to work, everyone cancels class, I once again gently explain to a regular that eugenics is bad. I would like to curse him out. I cant. He drops a grand on scuba gear and leaves, talking about how great his trip to Mexico will be.

I do not scream.

A friend calls to ask how I'm doing. Not great. Yea, her niether. She asks if I want to go out to the backcountry with her over the weekend. I explain that my leg physically does not move and I'm downing copious amounts of advil to remain upright. The doctor sent me in for an MRI but has not yet called back. Plus I'm supposed to go to Valdez for the weekend and actually go diving. That I can do with limited use of my leg.

She says yikes, take it easy, take care of yourself, I love you.

I say, yikes, I'm tired of taking it easy, I wanna play, I love you too.

Hit me up if your plans open up and we can do something gentle on your leg. She says.

God yes. The cold woods away from people sounds like paradise. I dont even care that it will cause me rending physical pain to get there. I need a break.

Its Wednesday. I go to school. I get pulled over. Miraculously I dont get a ticket. I'm white female and conventionaly attractive, maybe not so miraculous. I rolled through a stop sign but I'm pretty sure I couldn't afford a ticket.

I get a text in class. One of the instructors who works with the dive shop has tested positive for covid. I haven't seen the man in 2 months. I needed a spare instructor but he was nowhere to be found. But hey, evidently that's a good thing.

I go to work. I vacillate between doing the job a 4 people and having nothing to do.

I go to the grocery store because I misjudged my last monthly grocery run and even though I'm increasing my exposure I'm out of cheese and tea damnit.

The store is packed. Pandemic who?

My partner and I haven't had a date nite in a while and this week has been shitty. I want a nice dinner. I pick up a couple boxes of the carton sushi which isnt terrible and is about as nice as I can justify on the new budget. I grab a gallon of milk and a few other things. I forgot my wallet in the truck and the cashier is chill and sets my stuff aside while I grab it.

I pay and take my stuff home and realize I left one of my bags at the store. No cheese or tea for me.

Thursday. 10am my phone goes off with an emergency alert. The govoner has grown a spine in light of recent elections and is instituting a voluntary lock down. My state has 500 new cases a day. That might not sound like a lot but theres only 300,000 people in Alaska and we've got poor medical infrastructure.

Unfortunately Alaska is full of Alaskans and nobody can tell us what to do. Nothing changes. 7pm rolls around and I'm teaching scuba classes in the pool.

I load a few hundred pounds of scuba gear into the back of my truck. In a wet wetsuit. In the snow. In a fabric facemask. 6 feet apart. In the pool.

I dont get paid for pool time.

Over the summer we had 6 dive masters including me, all big burly dudes, much better suited to picking things up. Its November and I'm the only one.

The kids I'm teaching are going to Hawaii. They're 10 and 13 and so wildly excited about breathing underwater its beautiful to watch. And they're traveling to an island. In a pandemic.

Friday.

Unload scuba gear so it doesnt get stolen out of the back of my truck while I'm at class. Were doing a make up lab today. Hey of the five student in my class only one of us has covid so theres that.

My boss calls an let's me know that shes left for Valdez without me. If I'd like to make an 8 hour drive by myself in a snowstorm I'm welcome to follow.

I'm in class till an hour before shop closing. I'm not driving across town so I can run on the open sign for half an hour.

The shop stays closed on Friday.

Saturday.

I explained to everyone we had business with that the shop would be closed over the weekend and Friday. I planned on being in Valdez. Hell I canceled plans to be in Valdez.

I open the shop and immediately field calls about why we werent open. I start to explain about the Valdez trip and logistical difficulties and then I realize that shes not mad about that. The woman was here before I opened early this morning. We have never been open that early. The hours are on the door.

A regular comes in. Hes also confused as to why I'm here.

Sunday finds me curled up in bed, reluctant to leave. Getting out of bed has not played out well for me recently.

A friend comes over to chat with my partner about specialist rifle parts. This isnt that wierd, he works at a gun shop and they've been discussing upgrading my partners current rifle set up.

He is wearing a full Scottish kilt. Red tartan. Looks very lovely.

I make zucchini bread and my proportions are a little off because I have too much zucchini so it's a little over moist but it's good. I'm recovering from an asskicker of a week and next week will be better.

Monday morning:

Baby brother has covid

Dads getting the results of his rapid test tonight.

Mom isnt getting tested because she says she doesnt have symptoms but that's not the fucking point mom.

So, I'm not going home for thanksgiving. I'm not diving in Valdez. I'm not skiing backcountry.

I'm not sick. I'm not flat broke yet. I dont have a ticket. I have a job. I have people who care about me. Im managing my physical and mental health as best I can. Im just fucking exhausted.

[cokainezero]

and so it begins...

today is december 17, 2020. today is the day i realized just how unsatisfied with my life I am. well, unsatisfied is an understatement, im absolutely miserable. things need to change so I've made the executive choice to document my ✨journey✨. so what is this journey you ask? i want to be rich and successful and honestly I want a lot of clout. call it corny call it lame but that is what I want. Im realizing the best way to go about getting clout is to clout chase. before I get into how I plan on doing this I should at least say why I want this and how I got to this point. 

*yeah im about to air my life out so prepare for a long read

growing up I was not a hot girl. I was actually kind of a loser. in fact I was told I had school sh**ter vibes once and that really just put things into perspective. I can't say I was complete loser though because I did have friends, and they're good friends because we're all still super close almost a decade after we met. but I can't say I had a good high school experience. I was a big girl, my highest weight was 220 at least and im 5′5. i wore the same beat to shit hairstyle everyday and horribly mismatched, bum ass clothes. at one point i actually cut my hair about 2 inches so I was rocking an afro my junior year which was... tragic. I’m also a black woman in an oh so predominantly white area so that was fun, but like I said, I was not a hot girl. I was never asked to any dances, never had a boyfriend. NEVER BEEN KISSED. obviously these aren't the most important things in the world but it did hurt my teenage heart to see my friends and everyone else experience those things while I stayed at home watching movies nobody has heard of and obsessing over stan twitter. my home life also wasn't perfect. i grew up in an extremely poor and abusive household. it's not something I like to talk about so this is about as far as i’ll go with that but I am who I am because of my environment. 

so now that I've covered my backstory, i’ll tell you the catalyst. so im 19 turning 20 and a freshmen in college. I took a gap year and ohhhh let me tell you it was the longest year of my life. I don't think I've ever been so depressed in my life. I spent 9 months working, spending money I didn’t have, binge eating, and just being an overall mess. but april... let me tell you about april. the beginning of quarantine. a switch must have been flipped in my brain because I actually started getting my shit together. in the span of 3 months, I lost 40lbs, I started posting on ig, I became really close with my best friend again, I was heading off to college, I bought myself a 16in MacBook Pro, a whole new wardrobe, and 7k in my savings account. not to mention I had a 730 credit score. things were finally looking up.

and now here comes my first semester in college in NEW YORK CITYYY! yeah I was miserable. for some reason I just had a really hard time making friends. I think I can say that the people on my floor are my friends but I really just don’t have any meaningful connections with them. I don't talk to any of them outside of seeing them face to face. next semester I think I'll actually try to initiate things on my part and see how it goes. I'll also need to force myself to join clubs and just be more extroverted. I also kind of want a group of hot girl friends to do fun city gurl activities. but back to the point, I spent a lot of time alone. most days I'd wake up at 2pm, maybe go to class. NEVER did homework. I would literally sit at my desk all day, smoke and watch movies. I also spent a ridiculous amount of money that was meant to go towards my tuition but c’est la vie. my first semester wasn't completely uneventful I will say. those days of doing nothing we're followed by 6-8 hours of hanging out in the lounge with my floor mates. honestly it was fun. it was the only thing that kept me from going home and giving up. I also had my first interactions with men! this was definitely a huge confidence boost.

but I was stagnant. I made no progress, no connections, made no money, and did not a thing. I failed 2 classes and withdrew from 1. writing that made me realize I was regressing if anything. one major highlight is definitely my ig. I started posting right after orientation and from that point to now I've went from 300 followers and 80 likes to 600 followers and 180 likes. 

over winter break I've started to heavily review my life. what did I really want? who did I want to be? I feel like I've found the answers to my questions now. I want to be it. to be it I need to be a better me. A better me wants to follow her dreams. 

STARTING TODAY I am going to document my revamp. by the end of the second semester I hope to accomplish these things that will create a better life for me. 

in no particular order...

SOCIAL MEDIA: 

ig: 1k followers.

twitter: active account with 300 followers.

PERSONAL:

weigh 135lbs.

refine my sense of style.

find my aesthetic.

make real connections.

have a friend group.

find a side hustle.

CAREER + EDUCATION:

join clubs and attend more events.

pass all my classes.

find connections within the film industry.

build connections with those people.

I really hope things start to change for me.

[aquagenesis]

im losing my fucking mind so everyone bear with me i’m fine though i’m just losing my mind.

i keep thinking back on a lot of my delusions i’ve been locked in for the past seven years and the more i think about them the more they all make sense.  the way i kept hearing someone’s voice in my head, the way my paranoia kept getting increasingly worse in the three years post-the relationship when i knew i was still being surveilled.

the way my immediate reaction to everything is suicide because i feel like i was cheated out of my way out following my living will being stolen from me.  i survived and i didn’t want to and there was no way for me to tell anyone what was happening because i was genuinely fearful for my life and well-being on all fronts.  i had to succeed if i was going to try again.  i had to.  so now it doesn’t even feel like the end anymore; it feels like that’s the only way out.

the way any time i have to help someone else, or do something for someone else, i freak out if i feel like it’s going too far.  my absolute aversion to being stuck in a house while everyone else is free to go wherever they want.  my fear of being alone, my fear of not being financially secure, my fear of showing any signs of personality or dislike because i’m afraid i’m going to get screamed at and abandoned and told if i’m so unhappy well why don’t i just go back.

i have to admit to myself that coming off that relationship, i was severely unwell.  i have to admit that being used as a turf war grudge match piece between my TWO wildly different abusive exes warped my brain to feel like that’s just.  what it was always going to be.  i was always going to be an accessory, i would always be a trophy, nobody would ever come and help me because they truly thought what was happening to me was wrong.  it sucks, and it sucks even more because i was then 20 or 21 or whatever i was forced to just move on with life and pretend like none of it had ever happened.

if he hadn’t found someone else it still would have been me.  i would be there now.  we were almost engaged, i was almost there.  i can’t stop thinking of the life i could be leading even though it rips me apart every time.  i can’t stop thinking one day the delusion will drop and my girlfriend will actually be him, i’ll be waking up next to him.  i can’t stop thinking of my period as the only thing keeping me from living that life.  i can���t stop remembering i was cast aside as “entertainment” because he realized he was gay and i wasn’t homicidal or obedient enough even though he spent the better part of a year blackmailing me out of a personality and out of my own autonomy.  i can’t stop thinking about the people who were looking in my windows, about the cars circling my house, about whoever it was that smashed through my window and got me institutionalized.

i can’t stop thinking about the fact that maybe if i could just get away; maybe if i could have one of those retreats where they’d send “hysterical” women into the mountains for “fresh air” maybe i’d be able to forget.  maybe if money wasn’t the thing that mattered above all, i’d be able to forget.  maybe if i didn’t know if i crawled back to him and groveled my problems would be solved, i’d be able to forget.  i don’t even want him or for my problems to be solved at the exchange of myself.  i’d rather suffer and die than ever go back to him, but maybe that’s the problem.  i’m still viewing him as an option i have to go through, i’m still viewing him as right behind me all the time just waiting to grab me again and take me away from everything.

it’s so strange to think after everything he did he’d really just be over this, but i wasn’t integral to him in the first place.  it’s so strange to think after three years it could really just be over.  it’s so strange to think dropping off the face of the earth, cutting off all my hair, changing my name could fix everything.

i don’t belong to him.  i know i don’t.  i know a living will is useless unless it has the need to be used; i know he doesn’t care enough about specifically me.  he could find anyone else; i didn’t need him as much as he needed me to.  but when he said it over and over that he owned me, he could buy me off my parents and wouldn’t they just agree if he wrote a blank check.  they wanted to get rid of me anyway, and he only made their problems with me worse.  his words still echo in my head and when i look around the world at so many people who look and sound and act just like him it’s so fucking impossible to forgive anyone for anything they do like him.  oh, you want money?  fucking colonizer.  you want security?  would you sell out the welsh people to the english to make your fortune?  would you subscribe to killing people for the sake of your career?

and they do.  i can’t even hate engineers or people who get into defense but i want to so badly because that’s what he wanted.  “your government pays you openly on college campuses to pretend you’re defending your country that’s covered by anti-nuclear warheads?  why do they bother pretending?”  “america sounds great; in the UK it’s so much harder to get a job where you can kill whoever you want”.

he was fucking disgusting.  he was insatiable.  he was every abusive ex rolled into one and the one thing he didn’t do, which was sexually exploit me, got taken up by everyone i dated after him because they were at least willing to call me beautiful and that they loved me.  and they’d tell him what they were doing to me, to try to get to him.  they would send him my pictures, they would send him everything i said about him and gloat They had me and not him.

how am i supposed to move on.  how am i supposed to be alright after this.  even if it was just all talk, to be dehumanized and objectified to every extent of the terms.  constantly.  by people who claimed to love me.

god i wish i could like, say “oh yeah hey i’m uh.  i’m not allowed to be involved with mainstream society because everything fucking triggers me.  capitalism triggers me.  people buying me shit triggers me.  the concept of sex and nudes triggers me.  vacations and disney trigger me.”  holy fucking god how am i supposed to be functional when my fucking life was on demand.  when i couldn’t eat or drink what he didn’t want me to or WHEN he wanted me to.  when i wasn’t allowed to do anything in case he wanted me.  it makes me sick to my fucking stomach.

[gamerwoo]

Yixing: Side Job (Part 2)

Characters: Yixing x female reader (featuring Jongin, Sehun, and Junmyeon)

Genre/warnings: camboy au, barista au, crack, kinda fluffy, mentions of masturbation

Word count: 3,453

Summary: Your go-to to get off is your favorite camboy who goes by the name of Lay. Physically, he’s perfect, and everything he says leaves you breathless and wanting him to keep talking until you’re coming undone in front of your laptop. However, you notice that the new barista hired at the cafe down the street has a voice that sounds familiar…

Part 1 | Part 3

Coming home that day, you went straight to your room and flopped down on it face first. Your friend kept asking if you were feeling alright because you weren’t paying any attention at all the whole day. All you could think about was how Lay, your favorite camboy, was a barista just down the fucking street! And then that lead to the fact that he must’ve lived nearby, which was somehow even more terrifying.

There were three things you knew for sure: first, you weren’t sure you could ever watch another one of Lay’s streams; second, you were never stepping foot in that cafe ever again; third, Lay’s face was just as drop-dead gorgeous as his body.

No, not Lay. His name was Yixing. And you couldn’t get that out of your head for some reason. You knew Lay was probably some sort of alias, but you never expected you’d know his real name. It felt too...personal. You weren’t sure how you felt about it.

You spent the next few days trying to keep yourself as distracted as possible. You didn’t want to go watch any of his streams -- no matter how mentally and emotionally exhausted you felt -- and you didn’t want to build up the curiosity to go back to the cafe and see if he was there because some masochistic part of you wanted to go back and take in the fact that Lay was a real person that was right in front of you. But you wouldn’t let yourself do that.

It wasn’t until those few days had gone by that your promise to never return to the cafe was broken.

Jonginie: come keep me company :(

you: do you not realize what time it is???

Jonginie: but studying sucks and i need friends

you: sehun exists???

you: taemin exists????

you: jimin exists??????

Jonginie: sehun's getting laid, jimin’s at a concert, and the last time i invited taemin out late at night he got lost and i spent two hours trying to find him because he wouldn’t answer his phone

you: oh my god you big baby

you: where are you?

Jonginie: that little cafe down the street from your apartment :)

you: NO

you: NOPE

you: IM NOT GOING

Jonginie: ????

Jonginie: what the actual fuck is wrong with you

You couldn’t tell your best friend the reason you couldn’t go back to that cafe. You couldn’t admit that you watched a camboy and that camboy just happened to work there. You couldn’t tell him that the day before you ran into him, you donated $20 and called him Daddy as you begged for him to whip his dick out. You just couldn’t admit any of that.

So what excuse did you have to work with?

Jonginie: i’ll buy you your favorite!!! :)

None. You had no excuses at all.

you: i’ll be there in 10 ig

So you got dressed and put on your proverbial big girl pants before you grabbed your keys, slipped on your shoes, and left the house with your phone in your pocket just in case. Only Jongin would ask you to meet him at a coffee shop at 8pm so he could study and not be alone, so you, being a female, had to keep your phone with you at all times and have your keys in hand just in case -- and not just to unlock your door when you got home.

Thankfully, the walk to the cafe was uneventful, but you couldn’t get your brain to calm down the whole way there. You were just worrying about if Lay -- Yixing -- would be there. You didn’t even know what you were so worried about the longer you thought about it. It wasn’t like you had to talk to him. Just say hello, order, and then say thanks and have a good day. It was so simple but your stupid imagination was acting like he would somehow know you masturbated to him on a weekly basis. 

Taking a final deep breath, you opened the door to the cafe and walked in -- you also made note to check their hours and you were surprised to find the cafe had such late hours, but it was probably because there was a college campus nearby. You glanced at the counter, offering an awkward smile to the bored-looking girl working. She seemed to be the only one working, in fact, since the cafe was empty except for Jongin and some other poor college student that was typing away furiously on their laptop. 

“Hey!” Jongin grinned as you sat down across from him. The table was covered with papers, his textbook, and his notebook that he was scribbling in. “You should’ve told me when you were closer by so I could’ve ordered for you.”

“It’s fine, I can order for myself,” you shrugged.

“Alright, here’s my card,” he said as he pulled out his wallet and handed his card over to you. “I’m gonna use the bathroom really quick.”

As you both got up, you stopped at the counter while Jongin went passed it to where the restrooms were located. You greeted the poor barista before ordering what you wanted and paying for it. But as you waited for her to make your drink, you started to get curious. You figured you had nothing to lose if you were never coming back here -- starting tonight -- so you softly spoke up.

“Excuse me? Um...w-when does Yixing usually work?”

The girl looked up at the sound of your voice, “Yixing? Uh, usually mornings, I think.”

You nodded with a quiet “thanks”, happy she didn’t ask why you wanted to know. She finished making your drink and handed it to you with a “enjoy” that wasn’t nearly as chipper as the one Yixing gave you, but that was neither here nor there.

As you went back to your table, you smirked to yourself. Maybe you could find away around avoiding the cafe, especially since this seemed to be where Jongin liked to study now. If you just came here at night, you’d be safe. It made sense anyway -- nighttime was when Lay liked to stream. If you just didn’t come in the mornings, you were safe. You could easily get your coffee and not run into the boy that didn’t know you’d seen him naked way more times than you could count on one hand.

“What’re you smirking about?” Jongin scoffed as he walked back over to the table.

You cleared your throat, scrunching your face before letting it fall back to its neutral state, “Nothing. Do your homework.”

-

The cafe was back to being a safe space now that you knew Yixing’s -- Lay’s; you never knew what to call him, honestly -- schedule. You showed up quite a bit to keep Jongin company while he studied. Sometimes his other friends would join which was always...interesting to say the least -- especially with Taemin. Sometimes it was just you and Jongin with him complaining about how he hated homework and wondering why he went to college. 

After a couple weeks, you had calmed down enough to be able to go back to watching Lay’s streams. You figured there was no harm if you didn’t really know him and would never see him again, so...why not? Plus, you hadn’t gotten a really good orgasm ever since you stopped watching him and you really couldn’t take it anymore. You had to give in because you were weak.

A month had gone by and you were finally over your fear of seeing Lay at the cafe.

While you were packing your things up to go home from work, your phone vibrated. You took it out to check, seeing Jongin was texting you.

Jonginie: can i stay at your place tonight?

Jonginie: i miss you :(

you: okay whats the real reason

Jonginie: .......my roommate’s drunk and obnoxious and i probably won’t sleep tonight

Jonginie: BUT I SWEAR I ALSO MISS YOU

Jonginie: please?? :(((((

If you were going to host Jongin tonight, you’d need something to keep you awake after you got home. Typically you were able to crash then and there and it would only be about 6:30. So after agreeing to let Jongin stay over, you grabbed your things and left work, deciding your next destination was the cafe.

When you entered, nobody was at the counter. There were only a few customers inside, already having gotten their coffees. Some were on their phones as they sat at tables, and some were working on their laptops. You didn’t really pay much attention to them -- or anybody -- as you walked up to the counter to order a coffee, looking down at your phone instead.

“Hi! How can I help you?” that friendly voice chirped, shooting ice through your veins as you all but froze on the spot.

Slowly, you looked up, almost whimpering when your eyes moved over the nametag that read Yixing. Your eyes met his as he smiled at you, showing off his dimples as he waited for your reply.

Internally, you were panicking. He wasn’t supposed to work nights! Why was he working? Why was he here? Why now? Why, why, why?

But externally, you shyly gave him your order before you paid for it.

Yixing turned to make your order as you went to wait by the pick-up counter. You couldn’t keep your eyes off of him even though you wanted so badly to look away and erase all of this from your mind. But your eyes followed him as he moved around, thinking about how good he looked even in his barista uniform. Maybe he’d do a barista theme for one of his cams...

‘Jesus, _____, stop it. That’s weird, don’t go there.’

You shook the thought from your mind, taking a deep breath to try to clear your thoughts. That was when Yixing walked over with your order, sliding it across the counter to you with his dumb beautiful smile that made your legs turn to jelly.

“Have a good day, _____,” he grinned, remembering your name from when you gave him the order.

And that’s when you said the worst thing you could’ve said to him other than admitting you watched his cams. Your stupid brain wasn’t thinking, and you blurted the only thing you could get away with in public, but would still probably not only send Yixing into a panic, but would make him think you were weird.

“Thanks, Lay.”

You were half-turned to leave when you realized, and you froze. Lay -- Yixing, Jesus; it’s Yixing -- froze as well, the smile dropping from his face as he just stared at you with an unreadable expression. His eyes were slightly widened, and his mouth was a little ajar, but you couldn’t tell what kind of emotion it was conveying. 

“Wh--” Yixing’s eyebrows furrowed the tiniest bit as he looked away at the counter before looking back at you again. “What did you just call me?”

You didn’t want to answer and drag this awkward conversation on even longer, but your legs also wouldn’t respond when you decided it was best to just walk away and not answer or look back. Your feet were practically glued to the floor, staring back at Yixing in silence as you looked like a deer in headlights.

“_____!” a familiar voice called.

Your head whipped around to see Jongin smiling at you as he waved, walking into the cafe. You almost wanted to cry from relief when you saw him.

“I was on my way to your place when I saw you were in here,” he chuckled, grabbing your arm. “C’mon, I told Sehunie he could come over to watch movies for a bit and he’s gonna beat us there. If he’s waiting for longer than 2 seconds, he’s going to complain all night and I don’t wanna hear it.”

Jongin dragged you away from the counter, forcing your legs and feet to finally move. However, your dumb, idiot self decided to look back over your shoulder to find Yixing still staring at you, watching as you disappeared out the door with Jongin -- who you now decided you’d owed your life to.

-

“You got here the same time as us, stop whining!” Jongin groaned as he pushed open the door to your apartment after he unlocked it.

Sehun followed in behind him, stating that the host should already be at the house before the guests get there, and that even arriving at the same time is impolite and “fucking dumb”. Jongin was quick to point out that it wasn’t a house, it was an apartment, so Sehun could take his whining and shove it up his ass. 

You walked in behind Sehun, still in a dazed state after what happened. Neither of them questioned your behavior since Jongin was chattering away the whole walk to the apartment, and then him and Sehun were bickering in the elevator. But in your head, all you were doing was replaying the incident with Yixing. How the hell did you actually call him Lay? How did you slip up like that? Just “thanks” would’ve been fine but no, you had to tack a name on the end of there.

Thankfully, the two boys were still oblivious to your spacey state even as the three of you sat down to watch a movie together. Sehun was on his phone for parts of it, but him and Jongin were still going back and forth throughout the movie. Both of them were critiquing the acting, the special effect -- basically anything that they could during the movie so you weren’t sure why they wanted to watch it. The only thing that interrupted them was Sehun’s phone dinging before he stood up and went to the door.

“A couple of friends wanted to stop by -- apparently it’s important so I said sure,” Sehun said over his shoulder as he went to go put his shoes on to go downstairs and let them in. “Hope you don’t mind, _____.”

You only half heard what he said, mumbling it was okay. But Jongin began lecturing the younger boy about how he shouldn’t have complained about manners and being polite when he just openly invited strangers to your apartment. But Sehun ignored him as he left, closing the door behind him.

You stayed spacing out on the couch, still replaying that awful embarrassing moment in your head. Sehun opening the door didn’t snap you out of it, and neither did his voice mingling with his friend’s. It wasn’t until you heard a third voice that your eyes went wide and your body went rigid. It was just a laugh, but it was one you recognized -- one that would probably haunt you in your dreams.

“Hey,” the way Sehun said the greeting made you and Jongin realize he wanted your attention, so you cautiously turned your head to see Sehun standing with a two shorter men -- one of which was already looking at you with those beautiful eyes that shot fear into your soul as of late, “this is Junmyeon-hyung, and this is Yixing-hyung.”

“I think I’ve met Junmyeon once before,” Jongin smiled. “Nice to see you again.”

“Hi,” you mumbled before you shot up from the couch and decided the kitchen seemed like a way better room to be in right now. “I’m gonna grab a drink.”

You scurried out of the room, hoping to go unnoticed. You hoped that even though Yixing was staring right at you that maybe somehow he didn’t recognize you as the person that called him by his camboy alias. You knew that was impossible, but you still hoped, anyway.

Entering the kitchen, you went to the fridge, hoping to just get a bottle of cold water to calm your nerves. But when you had the door halfway open, it was pushed shut. You stared at the ring-clad hand that was holding it shut, afraid to let your eyes follow the arm of it up to the owner, but you did so slowly anyway.

Yixing stood there with a raised eyebrow, but you couldn’t tell exactly what he was thinking or what he was feeling. He was showing virtually no emotion other than the quirked brow. He didn’t even say anything, and you were shrinking back away from his gaze, feeling like there was a weight pushing in on you.

When Yixing didn’t speak up, you said the only thing you could think of.

“W-why are you in my apartment...?”

To your surprise, he let out an amused chuckle, his eyes glancing away for a moment as he shook his head, “Sehun’s an acquaintance of mine. I thought that was pretty obvious when he introduced me. Of course, he did introduce me as Yixing and not Lay, so I could see why maybe it would be confusing to you.”

The smirk he gave you was teasing, and your cheeks immediately burned red as your gaze met the floor. You didn’t even know how to reply. Should you apologize? ...That was really the only option your brain could come up with.

“You watch me?” he asked, his voice soft but with a tinge of amusement.

You opened your mouth to reply, but nothing came out. Obviously you did watch him but you couldn’t bring yourself to verbally admit to it. How could you even admit to that? And right to his face in your kitchen while his and your friends were in the living room.

“You don’t have to panic,” he laughed softly, letting himself lean against your fridge door so his shoulder was resting against it with his arms crossed. “I mean, I’m the one who gets off on stream for everybody to see. I’m already aware that people watch me.”

“Still...” you mumbled, still unable to meet his eyes.

“You’re cute,” he giggled.

That made you look up, your eyes wide. Why did he say that? Literally what part of this made you seem cute to him? Or maybe he was just sadistic and found your embarrassment to be cute. Maybe he was into that. ...Then again, you recalled a stream where-- 

‘Not the time, _____.’

“You wanna know something?” he asked. “I came here on purpose.”

“What?” you blurted, looking absolutely horrified.

Now you were being bullied by a camboy. This was a new low in your life.

He let out a laugh that sounded so genuine, you didn’t think you’d ever heard it in any of his streams. He just looked so happy that you wanted to look at him laugh and hear him laugh forever.

“I swear it wasn’t just to torture you more,” he insisted before he explained, “but you called me Lay and I’d never had that happen before. I vaguely recognized your friend, and he said you were friends with Sehun -- when he was talking about the complaining, I realized it was the same Sehun. Him and my friend, Junmyeon are friends, so I texted Junmyeon and asked if he could do me a favor.”

“A...a favor...?”

“Alright, so maybe it was a little bit to tease you,” he giggled with a shrug. “I just-- You should’ve seen your face when the name slipped out! I don’t know, I guess I felt...intrigued. Why were you so scared anyway?”

“You wouldn’t be horrified if you had to admit to somebody you watched them get off on the internet?” you asked.

“Nah, seems like it would be more their problem than mine.”

“It’s still not at the top of my list of conversations I’d like to have.”

“What would be at the top?” he asked with a playful smirk.

“Not this...” you muttered.

“Yixing?” the other boy poked his head into the room before his face spread into a smile. He looked amused about something but you didn’t know what or why. “C’mon, let’s go.”

“Coming,” he nodded as the other boy left. He turned back to you, flashing a dimpled smile. “Come by the cafe tomorrow morning if you can. I’ll make you a drink -- my treat. Bye, _____.”

With a wave, he walked out of your kitchen. You didn’t realize you were holding your breath after his goodbye until you heard the door close and let out a sigh of relief.

Sehun and Jongin entered the kitchen, both looking around curiously.

“You and Yixing-hyung were in here for a while,” Sehun noted.

“Yeah,” Jongin looked at you with a crease between his eyebrows, giving you a questioning look, “did you two know each other?”

You shrugged, mumbling, “Kinda...”