#non retj for once

[purecommemasolitude]

for like four seconds (0:43-0:47) in this video piisuke radiates such mercutio energy it's wild

[cto10121]

Ranking the ‘Romeo Teases Juliette at the Balcony’ Moment From Every Production Because This Is Important, Trust Me

French: 10/10, classic, subtle, and the most romantic. Juliette’s WTF expression when she hears Roméo is perfect and meme-worthy. I also like how aggressively smooth the tease is—Roméo remaining under the balcony and then just walking out normally at the third line of his verse. You’re not fooling anyone, Roméo. I also like how at one point Roméo raises his hand as if to interrupt, but then decides against it (hello, Shakespeare Romeo! So good to see you). And then Juliette is just 🥰 over him, ha #same

English: 0/10. No tease, but worst of all, they begin the song already on the balcony AND with dialogue together, for no good reason!!! Once again: Shame and dishonor on this production. Idaho RetJ has a pretty low bar to clear on that front.

Russian: 8/10, cute as all hell. Russian Juliette at first is mostly just curious, looking around for the voice and HOLY SHIT freakin’ Russian Romeo just leaps out of freakin’ nowhere and she is just “eep!” and just hides behind her balcony railing like a startled cat. Incredible.

Hungarian: 9.99999/10, Rómeó straight-up LITERALLY teases her. I am dead. Júlia had ovaries of steel to have withstood that with just a rueful laugh. That said, I’m a little disappointed that he didn’t stay purposefully hidden like the others for the three lines; that would be so in line with Hungarian Rómeó he’s such a troll. Understandable, though, because of the non-balcony set up they have.

Austrian: 9/10. Still one of the best and most obvious teases, very faithful to the French. Freakin’ Austrian Romeo purposefully hides away from Julia while she is actively looking for him and then the way he charges upstage and soars on the (changed) high notes in declaration…YES. 100000 points to Gryffindor.

Mexican: 5/10, pretty much no tease. Romeo is exposed along the wall and has to prepare himself to even speak to Julieta, poor baby. Unfortunately the editing doesn’t show Julieta’s initial reaction, but she does look so damn overjoyed, d’aww. I forgive it (also the translation is so, so close. Painfully slow tempo, though).

Revival: 7/10. Roméo starting stage right and then scurrying over to the balcony gives such “Don’t let her see me don’t let her see me run run run!!” vibes, I’m crying. That said, Juliette isn’t even surprised here. She hears him and it’s all, “Oh, love of my life’s here, aw, fiddlesticks, my hair’s a mess, lemme fix it.” -.- I know she has limited room to react compared to original Juliette, but c’mon.

Takarazuka: 4/10, no tease either. Takarazuka Romeo just climbs directly (with stairs!!! I swear these Romeos just get lazier with each production). Takarazuka Juliette’s :O is super cute, though, so anime, so points for that. C’mon, y’all.

Italian: 5/10. Romeo opted for the Freudian pillar. -.- I…suppose that can be considered a tease. Either way, this is really borderline between hilariously fun and hilariously awful. The rest of the Balcony was solid, though, minus the unnecessary Shakespeare. (Also, rewatching it, they actually framed Romeo’s verse as a monologue that Giulietta doesn’t hear until almost the very end. Nope. Downgraded for that).

Toho: 5/10. No tease, but we do get Black!Romeo looking adorably 🥰 when Black!Juliette says his name. He hesitates for a moment before climbing the balcony railing à la French (finally!). Juliette is also :O though not as adorable as Takarazuka R&J. So a little extra bump for the cute reactions.

Chinese: 6/10. The latest RetJ! Pretty much a Revival copy, very sweet and laidback. Romeo hides as soon as he hears Juliette, Juliette is just about to go in, but then hears Romeo’s voice. Finds him too easily, though, knows exactly who he is. Lame, but there is something to be said about the lack of drama of it all. Once again, though, Chinese Juliette does the self-conscious fixing-hair thing. Kill it with fire. (Edit: There is actually a second Balcony with a different Juliette, or at least in a different dress. Much better).

[lavender-lizzy]

French Musicals Tag. 

It is hard for me to give only one answer to each question, so I decided I was going to pick 1 to 3 answers. The musicals I took into consideration were: Roméo et Juliette, Notre Dame de Paris, Mozart l’Opéra Rock, 1789 - Les Amants de la Bastille and Le Roi Soleil. I tried to mix it up a little bit, so that I didn’t end up choosing the same musical all the time. 

1. Favourite Musical: Roméo et Juliette, Notre Dame de Paris. I love both of these comédies musicales a lot. NDDP was the first one I ever saw, and it has a special place in my heart. Roméo et Juliette is the one I think about the most, and always want to rewatch. 

2. Favourite Troupe: Roméo et Juliette (2001). I could have chosen NDDP for this as well, but I just adore the cast in the original ReTJ.

3. Favourite Male Singer: Tom Ross (RetJ), Damien Sargue (ReTJ), Bruno Pelletier (NDDP). I stopped at three because I promised I would, but there are many many talented male singers in these musicals. 

4. Favourite Female Singer: Cécilia Cara (ReTJ), Victoria Petrosillo (Le Roi Soleil). Once again, it’s hard to just pick two!

5. Favourite Actor: Mikelangelo Loconte, Yamin Dib (Mozart l’Opéra Rock) Rosenberg is really funny, and I love the way Mikelangelo plays Mozart, so here it goes.

6. Favourite Actress: Réjane Perry (ReTJ). Amazing singer as well, I was sad to find out that she passed away in 2003.

7. Favourite Male Character: Tybalt (ReTJ). I mean, does it even need saying? I was thinking of putting somebody else here and him for favourite villain, but he is indeed my favourite character, so it makes much more sense to put him here, where he belongs.

8. Favourite Female Character: Juliette Capulet (ReTJ), Isabelle (Le Roi Soleil)

9. Favourite Understudy/Alternate: Diane Dassigny (MOR). I saw her in MOR 3D and to be honest liked her more than Claire Pérot.

10. Favourite Villain: Frollo (NDDP). I love Daniel Lavoie, and Frollo’s songs are just beautiful. 

11. Favourite Song: this is impossibile, I am going to say Lune (NDDP), Le Duel, J’ai Peur (ReTJ), they are among my favourite in my two favourite musicals. (I briefly talked about my favourite songs from these musicals here and here) 

12. Favourite Love Song: Un Jour, L’Amour Heureux (ReTJ). I mean, how could have I not chosen ReTJ for the love song?

13. Favourite Guilty Pleasure Song: I don’t consider any of them guilty pleasure songs, really? I’d say Les Solos Sous Les Draps, maybe (MOR). It’s sort of fun and silly and the title is a sexual reference so I guess it fits the category. Or maybe A’ quoi tu danses (1789), for dancing Robespierre.

14. Favourite Dance Sequence / Number: Le Bal (ReTJ 2001). I think it’s beautiful, I love the choreography and the colours, and I could rewatch it an inordinate amount of times to see what all the characters are up to.

15. Favourite Opening Number: super hard because the opening numbers are always amazing! I really enjoy all of them a lot. I think my favourite are Le Temps des Cathédrales (NDDP), Vérone (ReTJ)

16. Favourite Act 1 Finale: Aimer (ReTJ). This one wasn’t hard to answer!

17. Favourite Finale/Curtain Call: for the curtain call itself, Roméo et Juliette, because I love Benvolio presenting all the characters, and then Aimer/Les Rois du Monde (2001) and Les Rois du Monde/Avoir 20 ans (2010).  For the final song, NDDP (Danse Mon Esmeralda) or MOR (Vivre à en crever).

18. Favourite Music Video:  Ça ira mon amour (1789). I really liked Desmoulins as well. The official videos for the songs tend to be a bit weird in general. 

19. Favourite Canon Pairing: Roméo et Juliette (ReTJ), Duc de Beaufort et Isabelle (Le Roi Soleil).

20. Favourite Non-Canon Pairing: probably Mozart and Salieri (MOR). I guess? I love seeing all the fanart.

21. Favourite Costume: I am doing it off the top of my head, because I would need to look at all the costumes of all the productions.

For male costumes, I love Tybalt’s costume in ReTJ 2001, both the red leather one and the one he is wearing at the ball (the trousers are the same). Also, the Duc de Beaufort’s black coat in Le Roi Soleil. And Mozart’s red coat in Je Dors sur des Roses.

For female costumes: Constance’s dress in Six Pieds Sous Terre and Nannerl’s dress in Penser l’Impossible (MOR).

22. Favourite Set Design: Roméo et Juliette 2001 (really, I think it’s sort of simple yet effective and I am not a big fan of the towers in the revival), 1789 - Les Amants de la Bastille, which was quite ingenious!

23. Favourite Choreography: That’s super difficult. I am ruling ReTJ out, because I chose Le Bal for the dance scene. The first musical to come to mind was Le Roi Soleil, because of its beautiful coreographies, and 1789 has great choreos, too. The thing is, when I have to think about a single choreography, my mind goes to Le Bien Qui Fait Mal (MOR). It’s probably not even my favourite, but it sure stays in your memory!

24. Favourite Foreign production: I have only seen Italian NDDP and Italian and Hungarian ReTJ (plus I listened to English ReTJ), so my choice is Italian Notre Dame de Paris! I think it’s a very good production. 

25. An Underrated Musical: well, NDDP is super popular with the public all over the world. I think it’s the most popular French musical ever probably, and definitely the most popular out of the 5 I’ve chosen, but I have to say I don’t see many posts on Tumblr (maybe I am just using the wrong tags). Also, everytime I try to look it up in the tags I see tons of posts about the Hunchback of Notre Dame musical. People, if you loved Hunchback you need to watch NDDP. 

26. An Underrated Pairing: maybe Mozart and Constance (MOR). I find posts about him and Salieri much more often (understandably, but still)

27. An Underrated Character: I am not sure she is underrated, but I am going for Fleur-de-Lys (NDDP). 

28. An Underrated Song: oh, I am not sure I know which ones are underrated. Maybe Tu Dois Te Marier, 2001 version (ReTJ). I love that it’s so upbeat. 

29. Fancast one musical: I can’t possibly think of doing this one, it would require too much thinking! 

30. Free Choice. Okay, my free choice is: most random thing you love about a musical. And for me it is the way Mercutio is pronounced in French, I LOVE IT.

[hoshigomi]

10 under 10

Inspired by @zukadiary‘s 12 Underclassmen I’m Into, here’s my spin on introducing you to my favorite young ones. 10 actresses under ken 10, presented in order as they are in that randomly generated graphic above. 

1.) Yuunagi Ryou, Hoshigumi Technically nicknamed Shimo, she has inspired many nicknames that I am the sole user of. I’ve watched more shinkos than I’d like to admit just to catch her saying a few lines in her bizarrely husky and staticky voice. Japanese Twitter has noticed that she’s getting very ヤバイ. One of the best dancers Hoshigumi has, full stop, and probably the most entertaining person I’ve ever watched fuck around in the back of scenes. I would pay full blu ray price for a star angle on her in group scenes. (Ask Me About her Food Antics and penchant for Touching Musumeyaku.) Her classmates have described her as ”強い”. I might be in love with her. Dream role: Hot Bad Boy in a 90′s teen romcom, Anyone in RetJ, a greaser in Grease.

2.) Honoka Kozakura, Hoshigumi Please sign here! (What’s this, you ask?- it’s a petition for the Hoshigumi Producers to Treat Honoka better!) Always the bridesmaid, never the bride, except the one time she got a shinko lead. Voice of an ANGEL. Captivatingly Present onstage. Word of God says she puts in a heartbreaking amount of real-life research into characters she plays and their circumstances, and it SHOWS. She is an ACTRESS.  Dream role: Cinderella. 

3.) Taiki Hayate, Hoshigumi I genuinely don’t have much to say about Taiki because she’s  a 105th and hasn’t grown into anything resembling her potential, which I am assuming she has based on the fact that she’s huge and delivered some IMPRESSIVE side-eye directed towards no one in particular in the Oceans Hatsubutai that I saw. Also, from her Takawiki profile: 

What’s not to love? Dream role: Bill in Me and My Girl in approximately 12 years.

4.) Irodori Michiru, Yukigumi I think it’s fair to admit that I love Michiru because she is probably the cutest human being I have ever seen in my entire life. She looks like a cat. She has the sweetest smile. I’d trust her with tasks like helping alter a dress while it was still on my body, and like being my baking partner for a neighborhood bake sale. Sweet voice, good actress, apparently was tracked against Kuracchi once upon a time but we see how that worked for both of them. I hope Yukigumi keeps her visible for as long as she wants to stick around. In my dreams, her and Machi Yuuka (or more realistically, Aasa), are the top combi of Yukigumi.  Dream role: Katherine in Newsies....

5.) Amato Kanon, Hoshigumi I could literally just write “Amato Kanon Will Be Top Star One Day” here and leave it at that. I have never in my life been so sure of anything. Kanon has made my shoulders shake with laughter (like in Elbe, as Johnny, always yelling, always skittish), and made my stomach drop in a way that a ken-3 otokoyaku should NOT be able to do. Her role in God of Stars is *chefs kiss* inspired. She’s got GAME (onstage). Multiple people have reported to me that they are unable to take their eyes off her. Cries a lot. Loved the hell out of Nanami Hiroki. Just had her first shinko lead, and I hope that was like lead number 1 of 5. Dream roles for her to play: Romeo, Ronan in 1789.

6.) Sumika Amane, Hoshigumi Sumika Amane won me over when I noticed that in the Killer Rouge rockette, she was looking towards the rafters and appeared to be earnestly PRAYING she wasn’t about to fall over. She’s played a non-speaking maid for like three shows in a row. She’s way taller than you think she is gonna be. She gets to sexy dance on the ginkyou in Éclair Brillant and it’s honestly more effective than I expected. Always in pink, the SWEETEST fashion sense, super cute ears. She may not be moving up in the troupe, but every day she moves up in my heart. Dream role: something where she speaks. 

7.) Aosaki Iori, Soragumi “Aosaki Iori doesn’t even look like herself” - zukadiary, on the picture in the graphic. She’s right. It doesn’t. When the pictures of the 103rd class came out, I picked Aosaki Iori on face alone, and I don’t regret it. I can’t say anything about her stage presence because Soragumi seems hell bent on hiding her from me, though I DID spot her THREE TIMES in the background in Oceans 11. She is TINY. She’s a good dancer! She has huge eyes and a wildly honest and innocent aura about her. I have no idea what she’s gonna grow up to be like. She’s not even in the upcoming Soragumi split. In my dreams, I get to see her for longer than 30 consecutive seconds as a bellboy that Seiko literally shoves aside. If You See This Child, please call me.  Dream role: Literally just let me see her.

8.) Ruri Hanaka, Hoshigumi Another 103rd pick on face alone, but BOY THIS ONE REALLY TURNED OUT TO BE SOMETHING. Ruri Hanaka has: more game than any ken 10+ otokoyaku I have ever seen, more raw sex appeal than Makaze and Aasa (bear with me) put together. I saw two twitter users refer to her as “Rockette Killer Rurihana”. She’s RIPPED. I made eye contact with her once and had to look away because I could not TAKE the energy with which she was looking at me. She gets dance solos for a reason. She runs fast (she was a HIT after her role as Betty in the Elbe Shinko.) I could list what she’s good at for an hour and I wouldn’t even be done.  Dream role: Elle Woods in Legally Blonde 

9.) Natsu Hayato, Soragumi This picture of her actually looks exactly like what Aosaki Iori looks like in real life. The main difference is Natsu Hayato is visible, (probably partially because she’s like nine feet tall.) She was in Sora’s Uptown Funk brilliant dreams. She kind of got the dance. Mostly she fucked around in the back with her oversized shirt not tucked in. Needless to say, I think she’s INSANELY cute and charming. She’s had some good shinko roles. Sweet sweet smile.  Dream role: Sailor Uranus or a barista in a coffee shop romcom. 

10.) Mizuno Yuri, Hoshigumi We call her “Noodle” because I have never seen a like longer, noodlier musumeyaku. Has been partnered with Kai multiple times in the past, which shows in her dance technique (best described as “following the suggestion of the choreography”). Once she tried to talk about Kai and cried so hard someone else had to take over for her. She has a TRULY STRANGE and wobbly way of speaking. Insane dimples. Genuinely reminds me of a newborn giraffe. Seems to have a FUN sense of humor and REAL personality though- and I can’t wait to see how she grows into it, though since they keep giving her either shinko LEADS or shinko nibante musumeyaku leads, maybe we won’t have to look too hard to see her.  Dream role: Sister Mary Patrick in Sister Act. 

[hell-heron]

I’m gonna be super predictable and say tycutio for the ship thing 😆

when I started shipping it if I did: after I saw resj which irc was late 2017 

my thoughts: A mess, but a beautiful one, raw and real. I Think in one way they can only be themselves with each other - that Mercutio feels like he can't bring out his wildness and anger beyond a fun comic relief friend level with anyone else and he desperately needs to do that, and that he really is the only person that can try to make Tybalt not take himself so seriously and chill for once and it's a beautiful dynamic even if they can't live two seconds without fighting. They could have had it allllll

What makes me happy about them: gosh so much. Despite the being obviously a very angsty ship. All the half childish half sexual teasing and the little moments where they are just both fucking dumbasses and how their personalities play off each other and contrast so nicely. My kids. 

What makes me sad about them: I'll leave it for the jury to fucking guess 😂

things done in fanfic that annoys me: I guess the huge emphasis on ~sexual tension~ fire hate and forbidden passion that there tends to be? Like objectively there is but it's not something super compelling to me at least in writing. It's more of a visual concept. Also treating Mercutio like he's a Montague no differently than Romeo or Benvolio  which... no, his being WILLFULLY a Montague ally is very different and even nicer for angst and Possessive Tybs potential 

things I look for in fanfic: lots of teasing, hurt comfort, happy what ifs. And all' the obvious teen drama that arises from that kind of situation. Also guys... when is someone gonna do something with Tybalt apparently knowing a lot of Mercutio's poetry skills... the original came out 18 years ago 😂

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: obviously Benvolio for Mercutio. For Tybalt the redhead dancer or whatever Capulet boy seems more Boyfriend Material in any given adaptation (but mostly the henchkitty and the famous (?) Cute Russian Mohawk Boy) or even Benvolio too. Not really in any retj production though. It's more of a G&R thing. 

My happily ever after for them: mhh I'd say Mercutio survives the duel therefore Tybalt is just banished, they make peace and turn it in a roadtrip? They pick up Benvolio at some point and they just go away from HellTown to work out all' their issues and make out. 

who is the big spoon/little spoon: I'm gonna say Tybalt is the big spoon bc 1) clingy and possessive and 2) Being Touched Unrequitedly Is Bad. Mercutio pretty much tolerates it but I imagine him often being gone before the sun is up anyway, bc he still doesn't really want to accept Doing This Seriously 

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: I was gonna say sparring but that's objectively too dignified for them, from what we see it's more like fistfighting in the street

[shadowofthemoth]

Benvolio for the character meme ^^

NAWWW my sweet cinnamon roll Benvolio :3 Thaaanks!

How I feel about this character: lol read the first line again xD 

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Mercutio! I will go down with this ship! Also La Muette, in case we’re talking postcanon, or that dark-skinned Montague girl with curly hair from the Austrian RetJ.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Romeo, obviously. In some versions I like to think he’s friends with Escalus (when there’s almost no age gap between the Prince and the younger characters). And Valentine for postcanon.

My unpopular opinion about this character: almost everyone seems to perceive Benny as a quiet, bookish guy, sometimes shy, and definitely the most rational and calm one of our favourite trio (not the Hungarian one, no, that one is very much unique)… but I like to think that still waters run deep. Ben’s not as peaceful and calm as he may seem; if need be, he will step forward and act. I once described him as a “cinnamon roll who can be a true fire-breathing dragon if he only chooses to.” Well, I still adhere to this desccription. ^^

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: Benvolio deserved none of this shit, so please William, bring his friends back and just let him be happy, would you?! 

[cto10121]

well i’m bored so might as well review the new twilight book, midnight sun. yeah

you know, if someone had come up to me circa ~2000s and told me “yo cto10121, i have a novel in mind, it’s kind of a beauty and the beast/romeo and juliet high school fantasy au, think it’ll work/make a ridiculous amount of money???” i probably would have said no, but cool fanfic, yo, you do you. but as stephenie meyer came up with twilight and literally spawned ya books as a marketable genre...it goes to show that it really isn’t the idea that matters, but the execution of it. too bad she got the most ridiculous amount of slack and bad faith criticism for it though - people really do not know their vampire fiction from their gothic romances

enter midnight sun in edward’s point of view, and now we’re in full-on b&b/hades and persephone territory (literally, the myth is alluded to so many times it’s ridiculous. on the other hand, meyer’s self-awareness is just so. refreshing. for a moment there all the ya romances shamelessly stealing based on r&j always had to mention something about how awful r&j was. my palms continually itched to strangle some fools from 2008 onwards. dark days, my friends, dark days). so let’s see how it goes

it starts off good: edward is appropriately haughty, arrogant on the side of an actual god complex, intelligent but also very quick to judge, and angsty about his bloodlust-y state. bonus points: he doesn’t think bella is all that at first and dismisses her from the word-go. so appropriately...beastly. i also like how in this version bella’s willingness to challenge edward on his bullshit, and the cycle of  edward assuming something about bella and then his assumptions turn out wrong, is much more evident here. of course, this is edward’s journey from beast to prince, so he gets to realize some truths about himself: he can’t control everything, he really is not a good judge of character, much less human character, and just...let nature take its course sometimes ffs

but alas, since pacing is everything in a romance, i felt edward’s realization that he is in love with bella came a little too fast - pretty much by alice’s vision of bella as a vampire it was confirmed and he was like wup guess i love this sweet-smelling now. i would have liked some more denial and resistance on edward’s part, probably moved alice’s vision way later, since that would have been in line with his all-knowing character and then show that he cares through the narrative. bella’s fascination with edward is woven through her POV so it did not have to be outright stated until very late in the game (the french title actually would have been more apropos - fascination. pretty much says it all). twilight actually has the structure of a mystery, so it’s sad that that aspect so quickly discarded

also - and this was a weakness of twilight too - the vampires are way too overpowered, to the point where immortality is much more of a sweet deal than ancient curse, and so edward’s beast-like angst over it a little less understandable. i know this is the fantasy equivalent/allegory of rich douchebags with obscene wealth, but still. some limits would have been very nice. how far can these vampires move? the super strength is particularly too much. on the other hand, there was more a fleshing out of the eras the vampires lived in and their backstories are still top-notched - you did believe the cullens came from another time entirely, especially edward.

but by far the greatest weakness is that there was too much detail - meyer no doubt found it difficult to stick to the original plotline so there was much less room to maneuver. this led to too many details, particularly unnecessary ones, and not the stuff you actually want to know re:character and lore (for my part, as an example: edward’s bloodlust situation was not at all unique, so why don’t the vampires have a name for it already? the volturi called the human a cantante - why is there no english equivalent, even if it’s just a transliteration? edward literally had to explain it fully to carlisle. but ignore me i’m just a language nerd). it served to dilute the romance, not enhance it. there should have been a lot more introspection, i feel

so that’s midnight sun for you. as for more structural criticism...well, the reason why i would not (normally) think b&b/r&j would make a good mashup is because of the two different character dynamics involved. b&b is essentially a may-december romance, with an older more experienced (and rich, the guy is always rich in these things) man with a tragic past/dark secret and a young, beautiful ingenue. r&j is an immediate mutual attraction, usually a coup de foudre whirlwind passion between two people of similar ages but who cannot be together because of an obstacle. there is obviously plenty of overlap, but the resolutions are different: b&b requires that the beast change his ways into a prince with the help of beauty and r&j is essentially tragic - when the obstacles are too high to be overcome and when the love is too strong to give up, lovers die and (sometimes) the obstacles too. twilight slides between the two poles fairly well, but ultimately goes on way too long. usually romances are one, two books at the most. either bella and/or edward should have died mutually, or bella should have turned into a vampire by the end of book two. the series never resolved the two fundamental diametric poles, only adding the feuding-houses aspect (vampires vs. werewolves) and the rival love interest. i will give midnight sun this, though: like disney’s b&b, it benefits from shifting the development on edward’s part, not bella’s. 

in sum: started out strong, but then lost the plot somewhere around the middle. the meadow scene still slaps, though. not one kiss and yet it’s hotter than the sahara at noon. i’ve forgotten how much the movies sucked, adaptation-wise; the series is pure gothic romance and they turned into an indie high school flick and then a fantasy coming-of-age flick.  

[cto10121]

Vérone - movie version

Because this is my blog and if i want to air out my headcanon!RetJ movie, by God, I’ve a right to. Feel free to skip.

N.B: For the purposes of this post and my weirdly exact imagination, this movie!RetJ will be an English adaptation. I know, I know. Take a deep breath and think best-case-scenario-under-the-BEST-circumstances. Think young!Stephen Sondheim doing the lyrics. Think whatever you need to think in order for this to make sense and/or be in the slightest way palatable. Okay. Roll film. 

FADE IN: 

So. It’s the Overture. Voiceover Narrator Guy gives it as the shadows of pre-dawn Verona come into view. Introducing Death dancing, as she does, eerie and graceful and beautiful because this is Hollywood/RetJ and everyone in this thing is hot as a general Rule. Maybe there is some nice animation that summarizes the events of the musical neatly. Either way, the Overture ends, and Death for once is still. She is expressive even in her stillness, cold and unearthly.

Then she gestures to her left. It’s the Montagues, all in blue, randomly appear in formation. She gestures to her right. It’s the Capulets, all in red, also randomly appearing in formation. She is complete control of them. They face each other, and then fight. 

Fight ballet, Redha-inspired, with lots of sharp movements and whirling bodies, scraping the ground, leaping in the air. More realistic fighting choreography than WSS, but still balletic. Let’s not inflict actual damage here, this is mostly symbolic. The feeling given is frenetic, intense. You catch glimpses of Tybalt and his male posse, Mercutio and Benvolio with theirs. The main male fighters are Sampson and Gregory on the Capulet side, Abram and Balthazar on the Montague one.   

At the climax the dancers, all Montague and Capulet youths, make way for Mercutio’s and Tybalt’s macho face-off, circling them. Mercutio taunts a coiled Tybalt while Benvolio tries to restrain Mercutio. Knives are out. 

But of course, the music changes, and so everything changes. Strings hold a fermatta in the air. Everyone knows what’s up. A lookout finally calls out: 

“The Prince!”

Staccatto strings on the bass clef. The French horn playing a chord variation of the melody. At the sound of it, your blood starts to pounding like African drums. “Yes,” you breathe, although it sounds more like “yaaas.” You know what’s going down. It’s the Prince of Verona, who has arrived with his guards, Veronian flag carriers, two royal family members, Paris and Valentine - pretty much the whole train. Death is not intimidated, but even she does something suspiciously like a flourish. She is the one who changes the Montague and Capulets’ youth’s direction. 

This Prince in question is more original French than Revival one, so think cold!badass rather than street rapper!badass. This Prince is one golden tower of barely restrained power, but it still shows, of course. It’s in the way he raps out the first verse and everyone instantly bows down to him. He enters, in my imagination, either on the balcony (not THAT one yet, but still, it’s ~suggestive) of a palatial capitol building or on the utmost step of the square’s dais. Either way, he’s on high. He looks down at these quarreling youths, who join him in a chorus.

They sing about their divided city, Verona. Their houses. Their blood and their honor, which they strive to defend at all cost. These two houses have been enemies for centuries and now their noble youth is repeating the same mistakes as their elders. Each side believes God is on their side, have been since Day 1. Each one knows they are in the right. Hence, the division. Hence, this (dare we say it...) polarization. Hence, Death.

The Prince, for his part, is cynical about this ancient quarrel, and has little hope in solving the problem permanently. All he thinks to do is curb its excesses, flex a bit of strong arm. What concerns him the most is keeping him and his family in power. In a way, he feels the exact same way as the youths themselves: This is Verona. We are Verona. It is what it is. 

He motions for the guards to quietly surround the youths, make sure there is no further trouble. During the song, there are some signs of renewed violence as they get overly excited, mostly on Sampson and Gregory and Abram and Balthazar’s part. They are reined in by said guards. 

At the key change, expect the heads of houses to arrive. First the Capulets, Lord Capulet, looking nicely parochial, and Lady Capulet flaky and fashionable in glittery burgundy, with a female servants for LC - maybe even the Nurse and the Mute girl, her servant. These servants will be distinguished by their uniform clothing, compared to the individualized ones for the M&C youths. The Poet is a servant/factotum of Lord Capulet, and accompanies him here. 

On the Montague side, Lady Montague arrives with her servant/lover in tow, a fierce, badass widow ready to take on the dysfunctional Capulet couple. She is ready. Come at her, bro. She faces off with Lord Capulet. 

“We are Verona,” ends the Prince. If this weren’t sung, we'd obviously hear the irony in that statement. 

So everyone of (immediate dramatic) importance in Verona is now gathered here, in this square. The architecture is half-Renaissance, half-modern, a sleek anachronism that works wonders. Where the hell is this set? Anywhere where people feud and fall in love, that’s where. 

The Prince descends closer to his citizenry, towards the glaring head of houses. The citizenry fall into predictable social scripts, one non-anachronism this film will allow. The servants on both sides kneel, touching their foreheads to the ground. The M&C female youths go down on one knee, the males bowing at the waist. The guards are erect, stiffly so. The heads of houses either bow slightly or do not do anything. Death raises her head haughtily. She is her own queen and she knows it. 

The Prince lets out his freak side at last and begins his rant. He is through, he says, with their fighting. He calls out Tybalt and Mercutio by name, ouch. Tybalt bows like the obedient if fucked up little soldier he is, but Mercutio? Mercutio of Escalus? He doesn’t give a fuck. 

His uncle is long-suffering. Mercutio can make even the most cold-stone badasses temporarily look like they’re in The Office. Mercutio sarcastically gives a bow. The Head P finally delivers his ultimatum: No more fighting or your ass is cooked. Except somewhat fancier. It isn’t iambic pentameter or anything, but it’s still fancier. The Prince also calls on Lord Capulet to meet him to hash out this truce agreement, with Lady Montague following later. Naturally. She has to sing with Lady Capulet first. 

He leaves with his train. The M&C youths do not leave, though. They still itch to fight. Perhaps it is Death, still doing her thing. Their movements become sinuous, less frenetic, but still deadly. Their fight-dancing has the touch of the tango to it. They are split now into M/C male and female couples. Let’s not kid ourselves here: There is an erotic component to this violence, and how it looks, well, rather intimate at turns. A Montague male extends a hand to a Capulet female, taking her hand - amatory? conciliatory? - and then thrusting her violently away. The opposite, too, occurs: A Capulet male goes down, but the Montague female gives him something kin to a caress.

This city is a treacherous one in many ways. The boundaries, however clear they appear on the outside, are not so clear when looked at more closely. Perhaps there is still a chance for this hate to turn into love (see what I did there?). But Lady Montague and Lady Capulet are not aware of this component to the feud, and what it implies. All they can see is hate.