#not bc I didn't like it but salaries are a joke

[the-tenth-arcanum]

starting to rethink my choice of changing my career path from Lawful Neutral (translating corporate communications) to Chaotic Evil (working in a digital marketing agency)

[girltomboy]

Wow, I just had the least productive conversation with my bf in the longest time lol. He called me to "apologize" I guess? And I tried to have a more in-depth conversation about what happened, and why he thinks his reactions/habits are normal, and he once again saw this as an attack, a 'versus' type of situation rather than an opportunity to communicate, so he kept giving me these abrupt and half-sarcastic responses, and it was pretty much going nowhere. And then he started telling me he "said what he had to say" AKA the same concise & repetitive apology, and I was like why did you even call me if you had this little intention to actually talk to me?? To which he replied idk and I had to hang up otherwise I'd have exploded or something lmao like idk what his brain is going through but I'm so over this and not knowing where the hell this relationship is even going?

[kieranalicante]

As a person who wears hearing aids I really want to clear some mistakes that appears while writing deaf!clint :) (idk if that sentence makes any sense lol)

1. You can sleep with hearing aid, it's not that uncomfortable as you read in those fics. You can sleep comfortable because everything depends how your head is lying on a pillow. You can press your ear to the pillow and still sleep — but only if that weird noise doesn't bother you bc if it does, it can be uncomfortable. People (including me) don't sleep with them just because it is not Eco friendly. Like if you have hearing aid with batteries, you have to buy more of them bc usually batteries rest for a week when you turn off them at night and turn on at day. And if you have hearing aid that you have to charge — they last for only 21 hours and then you have to charge them. The best option is just charging hearing aid at night.

2. Technically there is no hearing aids for adults that have a fun color BUT if you have a small ear you can use the child one (well, you have to change the program and the child aid doesn't have that many options but it is a possibility). Also you can buy stickers for hearing aids to make them more unique :D

3. There is a lot of companies that makes hearing aids but the most popular are Phonak and Oticon. I have the Phonak one and I'm very happy with it.

4. They're fucking EXPENSIVE. In Poland one hearing aid is for like 6000 polish zloty (that's my mom's salary lol) but the goverment helps people with buying them so i didn't have pay 12000 polish zloty. I paid only like 2000 polish zloty for two? And my hearing aid ISN'T like the best quality — the best one is like for 12000 polish zloty for one hearing aid!!!!

5. There are two kinds of the part you out directly in your ear — one of them is totally build up and with the other one you can feel the wind in your ear (I have to admit that I almost cried when i felt the wind in my ears for the first time lol)

6. I've talked with other deaf people and we all agreed that when you are used to hearing aid, not wearing it can make you anxious. Like I wish I was joking but I'm not.

7. Fucking wind. Like when the day is very windy you don't hear anything bc of the wind.

8. If you are born deaf (just like me for example) there is a high possibility that for some people your voice will sound weird. Maybe bc your voice can be a little bit higher? Idk tbh.

9. Yes, we can meet ableism. There are people that think that they can be ableists bc they don't see the hearing aids.

I think that's all. Hope that helps!!!

[agendabymooner]

keeper ! alex a. x ofc (kpop idol!ofc)

"and she my backup like to say she was my plan b. kinda ironic 'cause with her, i'd start a family."

summary: in which polly jintara berkshire, whose friend was an ex of an f1 driver, juggles her role as a blackpink member and alex albon's girlfriend. OR this is just a series of photos showing how down bad the couple are for one another ❤️

content warning: chatfic + tweets, use of explicit language, a lot of dirty jokes (nothing graphic), alex albon is a blink, references to stormzy songs, fluff

note: the title and quote is referring to my favourite tobi and manny song. anyway enjoy xx (i hope my jokes are funny enough)

masterlist

tagged blackpinkofficial, boamckinnon, thepolsci

liked by nicholaslatifi, jennierubyjane, roses_are_rosie

alex_albon kicking my feet when thepolsci pointed and winked at me tbh 😍😩 have my kids pinned by alex_albon

thepolsci no U HAVE MY KIDS 🥰 liked by alex_albon

landonorris absolutely shameless

georgerussell63 this isn't who we are, alex 🤦‍♂️

user1 bro who did you even go with 😭

alex_albon latifi 😊

user2 WHAT ARE YALL DOING IN A BLACKPINK CONCERT EVEN 😭

user3 alexander albon, driver on sundays and a blink every other day 💖

user4 lad i think it's a spider not a snake?

user5 shhhh don't ruin it for him. he's just being himself <3

user6 i just want him to show up one of these days in an interview and begin bonking the other drivers with his light stick like pLEASE ALEX

williamsracing cool stuff alex, but why didn't you take me there -logan liked by alex_albon

alex_albon big kids only, sorry mate. i'll bring the merch to you tho!

tagged thepolsci, ygentertainment, blackpinkofficial

liked by jennierubyjane, boamckinnon, logansargeant

user1 NO ALEX YOU LOOK COOL NEXT TO HER

user2 we gotta humble him- booooo get back in the car albono

charles_leclerc tell her she's very cool liked by alex_albon

alex_albon she doesn't need reminder 😎

jennierubyjane do we go to you for free marketing?

alex_albon no, you'd have to give me pols for the whole year then i can do free advertising

williamsracing this is not what your pr manager taught you and you know that alex

roses_are_rosie don't worry, your level of coolness heightened a little! liked by alex_albon

alex_albon phew! i thought i brought her down to my level tbh

thepolsci don't say that to yourself, you utter dickhead

alex_albon ily

user3 YES ALEX!!!! STREAM MONEY FOR CLEAR SKIN

alex_albon my real skincare routine is money on loop 🎼

thepolsci when we reach 8 figures you can have my kids liked by alex_albon

alex_albon are we talking combined salary for the next few years bc we can start the process now???

oscarpiastri touch grass

logansargeant this is not who we are alex

tagged thepolsci

liked by pierregasly, lance_stroll, danielricciardo

user1 MAN IS THIRSTY

user2 AND HE'S OWNING HIS THIRSTINESS

user3 now this- this is the standard

user4 are you talking about the picture or the guy who posted it?

user3 yes.

thepolsci screaming crying wailing

thepolsci on my knees frfr 😩😭 liked by alex_albon

alex_albon stay there 😇🏃‍♂️

user5 ALEX ?!!!

user6 MAN IS DOWN BAD

user7 if my gf is a baddie and a keeper i'd be down bad too 😭🤭 don't make fun of my boy like that

tagged alex_albon

liked by logansargeant, roses_are_rosie, jennierubyjane

user1 tbh a trip to paris doesn't hurt 🤔

user2 i want him or i want to be him idk 🧐

user3 ain't no way these two just made stormzy references on their posts

user4 girl serenaded alex with sidemen diss tracks before it's no wonder she posted this with a uk rap song 😭

user5 THAT'S PEAK LMFAO

alex_albon never!!!! liked by thepolsci

thepolsci ily bitch

alex_albon aren't you the sweetest 😩

thepolsci say it back 🥲

alex_albon thx buddy 🤩

thepolsci nvm i h8 you

user6 this is an emotional rollercoaster wtf 😭😭

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I reminded a friend he owes me money?

@aitathrowaway321 for finding later

I (20s, they/them) lent a friend Johnny (fake name. 20s, he/him) about $300 for rent about a year and a half ago. He was panicking because he'd bought a small tattoo that week, and had thought he'd budgeted for rent, but realized he forgot about another bill.

I'd once not had enough for rent and a friend who wasn't well off, without me asking, had offered to lend me the money for rent. It had been an incredibly kind act, and though I'd paid that friend back a few months later the first second I could, I've always remembered it. So I offered to do the same to Johnny (who knew this story) as a sort of pay-it-forward and that he could just pay me back when he was able, no rush at all. I also at the time had an okay job where I made enough to be able to do this, and Johnny's job was pretty awful.

Johnny was very thankful and agreed. At first, he'd bring up the debt a lot himself (I would never bring it up) and continually promise to pay it when he could, to which I'd be like - just as soon as you comfortably can, don't stress! And he mentioned it A LOT. Multiple times every single time I saw him at first. But eventually he stopped mentioning it entirely.

The two of us had this in-joke, and Johnny realized he could buy something related to the in-joke. He swore he'd buy it for me as a birthday gift (I didn't ask) and it would be so much fun, very soon after I lent him money. It would have been a nice gift, but it would've cost at least $200. In my head I decided that if he decided to get me the gift instead of paying me back I'd be happy either way, bc it's nice to be thought of. All I said aloud was that it would be a lot of fun, and it was a very kind thought from him. He would then regularly bring up buying me this gift for months. Then my birthday passed and I didn't get anything at all from him. Which was fine, I didn't ask for gifts! But then he stopped bringing up buying me anything OR paying back the money.

Now it's been almost a year and a half, and he seems to have entirely forgotten he ever owed me. I wouldn't mind so much - times are hard! - and it's not like I'm going to be angry if someone is spending money on nice dinners and pretty clothes instead of saving up for a no-deadline debt to a friend. People need to have nice things to get through life. But he keeps getting new tattoos and piercings (we go to the same parlor, I know they're pricey) and he recently planned and went on a big trip with a friend. It's not as if he hasn't had the ability to pay me back in the last few years. I also got laid off from my job, and $300 is a lot more to me than it used to be.

It's not so much that I want the money back as it is that I'm hurt he spent so much time talking big about paying me, and then when enough time had passed just dropped it entirely. I've had an issue in the past when after I got an okay job, suddenly people who had ghosted me were begging me for money (didn't know my salary but just assumed bc of the job title). And having been in awful situations, I tried to help where I could anyway, but then after getting the money they'd ghost me again. Johnny hasn't ghosted me, but he seems to have decided not to pay me back and pretend it never happened.

We have an event coming up where people will be paying for things and everyone else will be paying them back immediately - just bc it's easier to do things like buy tickets all at once and then pass them out, and easier for a restaurant to have one bill and then people venmo each other after. I was considering having Johnny pay and then tell him he can take it out of his debt to me.

I'm unsure if this is passive aggressive and rude, or if it's a good way to gently remind him he owes me without being a jerk about money - if he is still just struggling financially and hasn't forgotten, I don't want to rub anything in or make him stressed. I don't want money to ruin a friendship, but I'm feeling hurt.

[steven--lim]

okay I just don't even wanna watch a single video with Shane and Ryan anymore bc I don't wanna call myself a fan of them anymore. their fanbase is vindictive and toxic as fuck. the absolute vile things they're saying about Steven? what the actual fuck... like their shows don't cost money? like they don't also have salaries? people keep bringing up Steven's tesla, I don't think I've ever heard him mention his own car, only Shane and Ryan when they're joking about him.

I've kept my mouth shut about this since Watcher started but so many of y'all have absolutely pushed Steven to the back bc you like Shane and Ryan more. Not liking his content is one thing, that's totally fine but insulting the guy everytime he's on screen and now showing your real true colors acting like he held the other guys hostage to get them to agree to this or something. yes, Steven is the CEO which, if you'll remember from making watcher, happened bc Shane and Ryan didn't want to step up to that role and Steven already had some connections and took initiative to meet with investors.

I don't love the timing of this move either and I can't even afford it at the moment - don't even know if I'll be able to watch as I'm outside the US but I needed to defend Steven for a second. Stop making him the villain.

most of y'all are the meanest, most toxic "fans" I've ever seen. I don't wanna be part of the fanbase at all because of you.

[mrschwartz]

i'm gonna give you guys the story of my life these past couple of months and i need your advice

from the beginning of 2022 to the end of 2023 i worked in a bilingual kindergarten, let's call this school ABC, as a teacher's assistent and i loved it. it was close to my house and i loved the kids and my co-workers SO much, but the pay was an absolute joke and i worked 10 hours a day which made me miserable. (one detail from this school: they changed management in mid-2023 and the new bosses were super conservative and everyone hated their guts; a lot of people were fired or quit, including a coordinator's assistant, let's call her pam, and a teacher, let's call her beth, who went to work together in another school. let's call this school DEF. pam became a coordinator there and beth stayed a teacher)

then i quit bc i needed time to finish my graduation paper and i wanted something a little better salary-wise and with less working hours. my friend from college, let's call her mary, used to work at a school (let's call this school GHI) and they went looking for her for a teaching job, but she couldn't make it work with her schedule, so she recommended me. this was mid-december of last year. i did a cover letter, went through 3 interviews, the whole shabang. they made it seem like the job was mine so i held off sending more cvs around

okay all right. new years arrive. i still don't hear anything from them so i reach out and turns out they had chosen somebody else and didn't even bother letting me know 🤡 so i had just graduated and was unemployed, completely miserable. i started sending my resumé to some schools not hearing back from any, until beth (remember? from up there) sends me a message telling me her school, DEF, needs a teacher. i say i'm interested and pam, who already knew me from ABC, basically instantly hires me

i've been there for almost a month now, and it's been cute. my comute is 1 hour but easy and pleasant and my shift is 4,5 hours which is a blessing and fair i think for my salary being basically the same as it was on ABC. i have only 2 students and they're sweet and i'm working with my friends who i already know

when. a few days ago GHI contacts me to let me know they're interested in me for the position i had not gotten before. and i. want to die now knowing what to do. the salary is Great but GHI is a little farther away than DEF (1h20min comute, which includes bus, which i hate) and i'd have more students (more responsibility) PLUS+++ i'd have to quit DEF, where i've only been for less than a month, and i'd have to do it to my friend pam, who was relying on me for this entire year, let alone leave my students behind

i'm quaking and crying like what do i dooo

[mchiti]

Hala, have you managed to get your lil niece in a kit yet?

anon you're sooo sweet to remember this :(( EVEN SWEETER CAUSE SHE TURNS 2 MONTHS TODAY!!!!!!!!! it's like you knew anon :((( okay sorry for the excitement. I ACTUALLY GOT A FEW STUFF FROM ETSY!! A whole salary like jhdgs no joking I'd spend my whole money on her. One is the classic body, number 7 + her name cause she will need to know the cultural legacy!!!!! I got her a bigger size so still not good for now but you know it'll last longer.

AND PLEASE LOOK AT THIS BEAUTYYYYYY. I got the 9-13 months size. She is 2 months so yeah I'm too much. But I saw this and I was like YOU KNOW WHAT??? She's good for winter and for AFCON!!!!!

I wanted to get something with hakim on for her bc i mean my ego is big and it's not like my brother minds since he's been on his bandwagon with me for years. rip to our old days finding dutch streams in 2015/2018 when we were living under the same roof. But I didn't find anything for her at this age but there are cute shirts for toddlers sooo I'll definitely get her something later on (OR I'LL PRINT A DESIGN MYSELF which is even cooler)

Yeah that's all I'm basically have her all ready for her first afcon!!!! 💕💕💕 💕💕

[frankenjoly]

Akutagawa and Atsushi for the send me a character thing? 👀👀 I'm curious to know what your first impression of Akutagawa was like. I hope you're having a sweet day / night!!

Akutagawa

First impression: i didn't think too much of him besides "cool ability" methinks? then started warming up to him properly when starting to learn abut his story + development.

Impression now: I love him so much,,,,,

Favorite moment: if I had to pick just one, I think it'd be the "the words of your past" sskk scene (I also adore the fight against Fukuchi but I'm still sobbing).

Idea for a story: aus aside, the whole "established routine at the Aku siblings place with Tachi and Atsushi being around often" is Very Tempting.

Unpopular opinion: as funny as the omake where he shows his salary details to Atsushi is... I don't really see how that could be seen as him being a big spender/classist even (and I've seen a bunch). Like, spending a ton in durable clothes I can see, but not idk, gold-coated food.

Favorite relationship: Gin and Atsushi, I don't think I have to say why. Also Chuuya, for obvious reasons too.

Favorite headcanon: from an rp plot, the Akus adopting a kitten (the one from that wan chapter specifically). Also trans gay Aku, and Gin gifting him one of those reversible octopus plushies that only gets angrier as an inside joke.

Atsushi

First impression: I had a bit of a softer spot for Atsushi bcs I liked his will to go on and how he remained kind despite everything, but he didn't got the Fav™ status till longer.

Impression now: one of my Faves™ from bsd and one of the characters I write about the most, I love him.

Favorite moment: same as Akutagawa bcs they mirror each other, and how he goes all the way to save Kyoka.

Idea for a story: I have a ton, but to add something new... I wanna tackle more my idea about him basically having religious guilt (since the orphanage looks like a church and there's the director's design too, etc) specially around sex (there won't be straight up smut but there'll be signs). Mostly bcs, I've done/I'm doing it on rp but hadn't really used it for fic yet.

Unpopular opinion: I hope it's not that unpopular but, pls, give this boy his sass. He canonically has it.

Favorite relationship: To nobody's surprise, Akutagawa, Kyoka, Dazai, Lucy and Kunikida. And I'm all about sskk ant atsulucy, but ofc I can work with them platonically and so.

Favorite headcanon: transmasc Atsushi (and bi but that's soooo widespread it's kinda a given). Also he's a great cook and loves learning new recipes.

[chrysanthemumpink]

Idk, I just feel like he's not moving forward. And when we used to argue, id wonder if we could just get through it with love or whatever. But now, I don't know if there's even enough to get through. It feels like I'm slowly out growing him. Which is way worse than falling out of love with him.

Like we had this conversation about a "million dollar home." And maybe he thought we were just joking and maybe we were. But after some superficial google researchers, if we both made 6 figures, it would be possible. Nothing too crazy. I make 100,000k and he does too, we can have/own this thing. Between the two of us, there's literally 7 professional degrees. It's hard, really hard, but not impossible.

But he's barely done anything. To be perfectly honest, he hasn't grown much since the first day we met. That was 6 years ago. And I'm not saying, I've done a lot. But I'm not at square one anymore. Ever since that conversation, I've been working towards a relatively stable future.

And he's not lazy. He's really not. He doesn't do anything that makes him unhappy or uncomfortable. He prioritizes what makes him happy in the moment, never long term. And it's almost like he's incapable of invisioning something and actually working towards it.

I don't bring it up because that's the exact thing he's very very self conscious about. Like he says he hates Instagram because it makes him very jealous and resentful. He feels like he hasn't accomplished anything. He's 35.

And I think he does genuinely want more for himself. But won't do anything that will make him grow bc he keeps landing in things that keep him comfortable in one place. I've watched him turn down jobs and not seek opportunities because he doesn't like them. But he doesn't even try. He might like it if he did

Off topic, but there were times, maybe a year ago when there'd just be messages and pictures from girls. But these girls were like 21-25. Just reflecting on things, I guess, but I know 35 year old women his age would never give him the time of day. Heck, I'm 27. And I'm getting to my wits end.

And I have tried. I have tried to make him interrogate why he's willing to even entertain girls that young. Like the fact that you can have conversations with these people in their early 20s is a huge problem.

Then theres other times when he says he keeps me around because it's getting harder and harder to find a woman with no kids.

I don't know what I'm saying anymore. But he took this job overseas, without telling anyone. And yes, it's an amazing opportunity and yes it's fun to travel. But it's not an excuse to do yet another thing that absolves him from any responsibility. And it sure doesn't pay any kind of salary

There is no nice way to say this. But I wish he'd get a job. And actually do the things that wouldn't leave him jealous of his friends Instagram posts. Money isn't everything. It really isn't. And this isn't about money at all. It's just that he's living life as if he were a college student. We met as grad students so I lived the same way too. But when Im with him, its like we're still college kids.

And I don't want to be a college student anymore. I want a grown up. And I want a grown up partner.

There's just genuinely no way to bring that up nicely or while avoiding the insecurities that already exist. But if we break up and he dates another 23 year old, I can't say I didn't warn him

[cherienymphe]

So, basically, I fought with my aunt because of my dog. In March of 2020 I adopted a dog. She was three months old, I’ll call her Rose. My mom has a demanding job, so my aunt "stepped in" to help me a bit. My aunt was paid by my mom to take care of me when I was 15/16, because she had to work in another city. I moved states in early 2020 and then my aunt came to help in the process of adapting, specially for me. My mom still pays her.

My aunt is unemployed because my mom sustains her. Ever since my aunt lived with me she didn't work at all. My mom paid groceries, all bills, plus a salary for my aunt who just took me to take school tests on Fridays.

Today I had a fight with her because she always complains about my dog's doggy school. Were Rose goes to play and learn. My aunt dislikes the owner, their schedule, their teaching, etc. Yet she doesn't lift a finger to help Rose become more educated and controlled. I honestly have not been maintaining the school training at home because I'm literally on the verge on falling into depression.

I was at the kitchen making coffee for me and I was talking about Rose's behavior with my aunt's girlfriend which led to start the discussion. I said to my aunt that she should stop complaining about Rose's behavior if she does nothing to help her be better. She says she has no obligations, and she doesn't, but then she has no right to complain about what she's contributing to. And she denies that shit talks about it.

I said that while she says she cares for Rose, her actions don't match. When I forgot to give Rose food, because I'm on online school, she doesn’t remember me or gives Rose food. She says that Rose was asleep and wasn't hungry, which was a lie, Rose was hungry as hell. It's not her responsibility, but it cost nothing for her to warn me. She watches TV all day or is on the computer, we split and do chores and lunch together.

We fought and she said she will do nothing more for Rose. I said "Good. But then don't open your mouth to talk about her. Don't talk about her behavior, her school, nothing.". She kept saying "she's your responsibility, it's your dog". And it is, I do the best I can for Rose. All I ask from her is to be there when I can't, since she's unoccupied daily and it wouldn't hurt for her to care for 5 minutes to a dog she claims to care for.

Summarizing: I'm angry because while Rose is my dog, my aunt literally gets paid by my mother to do basically nothing (the only other thing she does is take care of my mother's bills, but still, my mom has an accountant). My other aunt said to me that who loves, take care. And I agreed. I'm not obliging my aunt to do anything, she does because she accepts it, if she didn't want to do it all why didn't she told me before? She used to guilt trip me into thinking that I didn't took care of my dog, bc I stayed in my room most of the day, even tho my door was open and I did meet my dog's needs everyday. She even joked and mocked me when I was having a low time and I thought that Rose didn't love me. And also, I think it's more than fair that she shouldn't complain about Rose's behavior if she enables it. - 🦠

I get that it’s your dog, and no your aunt shouldn’t be required to help take care of it, but she’s getting paid to help you out? Just in general. So I feel like your dog should fall under that category but that’s just me. She’s literally getting paid to help you out so if she doesn’t want to then I don’t think she has a right to really complain, especially if she enables the behavior like you said

[ecsta-zi]

My experience with white privilege (and how I found out it was real)

I was 20 years old and had been living in the Bronx for 4 years. I had a GED and seasonal/temp experience in both the restaurant and retail industries (3-4 months each.) So i only had about a year of experience working in retail and about 6 months or so working in restaurant. It seemed as though I was only capable of obtaining temporary jobs. It was frustrating because no matter how hard I worked at these jobs I just never seemed to be good enough to be hired permanently. Both times they simply told me that there were no permanent positions to be filled but my insecurities tell me I wasn't good enough.

When it came time to find a new job my boyfriend's mother referred me to Lisa Employment Agency at 247 West 35th Street New York, N.Y 10001. A job agency where you can only get restaurant jobs. She handed me my money and I was there at 8:45 am on 05/17/17.

When I came in, there was an area for people to wait. It was already filled for being nearly 9 :00 am and per usual I am the only caucasian in the room. Most of the people in the room were black and hispanic men. Some were half asleep, some of them were on their phone and some simply looked stressed. I saw an empty seat on the left side middle row at the end. Ahead there were a few desks. A Hispanic woman to the front left whos name is Sue and another Hispanic woman to the front right. In the back with the big desk there was a Hispanic man by the name of Rene Munoz.

Before my body even touched the seat I was called up by the big man himself (Rene.) I handed him the money and the resume I created myself. He looked at it and said "you don't have a lot of experience but that's ok because you're young." He made a phone call and I had a job interview set up for me to go to immediately. My position was "helper" at the juice bar at Pier 59 Studios. My starting wage was $15/Hr. This was BEFORE the minimum wage was set to $15/hr. If you don't know what Pier 59 Studios it is the LARGEST photography studio in the world. Name any fashion magazine! They've done shoots there. Now I am an obese pale white girl who wore their makeup like it was still 2010. Everyone there was GORGEOUS and the place was boujee as fuck. Even the damn secretary at the front desk was super model gorgeous. I felt out of place. Anyway, when Rene Munoz handed me the card he told me "bring more people like you, you know your kind....your friends."

He basically told me to bring more white people.

Prior to arriving my boyfriend's mother who was friends with sue (lady at the desk to the right who got my boyfriend the job at blake and Todd on 47th street) told me that sue told her that they were looking for more white people and that I would not have a problem getting a job because I'm white. My boyfriend's mother is hispanic as well as my boyfriend.

Since I was 14 I've been in and out of homes, cities, and towns where I was the only white girl. I was use to jokes like that. Like "oh don't worry you're white the cops won't pay you no mind" or the one time my friend said to her mom "don't worry mom she's white we won't get into any trouble." as a joke. I simply thought it was another one of those things.

I didn't actually think she was being deadass!!!

At the time I wasn't going to sit there and run my mouth about how racist that shit was. A bitch needed a job I didn't want to lose MY job opportunity by preaching. I shut my mouth and I went. [ Insert White Privilege Here]

At this agency you pay a fee and they give you three shots to try out different jobs. If i didn't like one they'd give me another.

My first day at Pier 59 studios was my training and I couldn't handle the pressure. There was so much perfection expected of you because you're serving drinks to people who worked in the fashion industry. There was talk about the famous people who came in and out of there, and there were perfect gorgeous people around me and i was a potato. Also apparently there was this very important french woman who worked in the industry having some brunch meeting. I wasn't about catering to people and celebrities in the fashion industry. I didn't show up the second day.

When I try to tell people this story, especially people from my race, they get so mad at me because they're the type of people who don't believe in "white privilege." They say the same thing as any other white person who doesn't get it. "I had a hard life, i was poor, i had no privileges, i had to work hard for everything I have. No that wasn't an example of white privilege it was an example of racism" That one was the most idiotic I've ever heard. But they fail to realize that there are employers out there that would literally take one look at you and one look at the black guy next to you and choose you simply because you're white. They don't understand that these men that were waiting in the waiting area were 10+ years older than me and obviously way more experienced! That they are waiting for jobs to accept them for an INTERVIEW because the employers working with the agency told them theyre not hiring black people and that they aren't hiring people who can't speak perfect english. I mean, it was heavily implied given the fact that only poc are sitting there and i walk out with a job interview in less than 20 minutes and was straight up told to my face to bring more people like me . They overlook the part where I tell them that Rene acknowledged the fact that I had little experience and he still gave me this boujee ass job with high expectations!! Completely missed the fact that the man told me to BRING MY KIND. That the color of my skin meant that I had a long list of employment opportunities because that is what they're looking for.

I was like them in a sense. I too grew up shit poor, i have a ged, I'm basically white trash and that I never got anywhere bc of my skin color. That day though, reality slapped me so hard I still can't believe that REALLY happened, that it still happens and that it happened right in front of my face.

I didn't do a thing about it. I felt so guilty for awhile and I still do. This isn't that "white guilt" shit or me "apologizing for being white." I know that pisses off white people.

Black and Hispanic people contributed a lot to who I am and where I am right now in my life even at 23 years old. I was raised and mentored by strong black queens who I would do anything for. If it weren't for them I probably wouldn't be alive. I was educated and influenced by black men. If it weren't for them I would still be struggling with reading comprehension, i would've failed english and history. I would've never got my GED. I wouldn't have gone to college. If it weren't for latinas I wouldn't know shit about cooking or cleaning or how to manage money, i wouldn't have a home, and i wouldn't have done anything decent in my life.

All of these people, people of color, who lifted me up off the ground, picked up every piece of my brokenness, and made me whole are the reason why I felt guilty. Not because I am ashamed to be white. But because I am ashamed of the fact that I wouldn't have even been there at that job agency if it weren't for them and that I failed to be an ally all for some boujee ass job I didn't want anyway.

I had to accept the fact that there wasn't much that I could do.

One day I was fucking around on google maps, writing reviews for places I've been to. I decided to look up Lisa Employment Agency and I wrote a review regarding what happened that day. A warning to those who are poc and desperate for a job to not give them their money. That was the best that I could do.

The purpose of me writing this is because people don't understand how real this shit is and that it still happens. White people don't understand that just because YOU yourself have never been in a position where you used your white privilege doesn't mean that it doesn't exist.

It does. Its real. And it's fucked up.

******Below I have a photo of the card that Rene gave me. I still have it for some reason. A big chuck of it was cut off but you can still see the name of the man at the agency. You can see where it says Pier, the date is there, and my starting salary. (I cut a piece of it off to scoop up my weed sorry) It is the only proof I have that it happened. The name and number written above my name was the name of the owner or manager at pier 59 studios.******

[tim-stonker]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: The Magnus Archives (Podcast) Rating: Not Rated Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims, mentioned Georgie Barker/Melanie King Characters: Jonathan Sims, Martin Blackwood, Tim Stoker (The Magnus Archives), Sasha James, Elias Bouchard, Melanie King, Alice "Daisy" Tonner, mentioned Basira Hussain, im sorry queen it was a 5+1 and u were number 6 Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No Powers, more like AU elias isnt a bitch, 5 Times, Mutual Pining, implied Nonbinar Jonathan Sims, he's gnc, Getting Together, Comfort No Hurt, bc we need that, Just Pals Being Soft, dimples as a plot point Summary:

5 times people didn't see jon's smile plus the 1 time someone did

i wrote some gay shit about jon smiling and it became this. whole thing is under the cut, check it out on ao3 if u wanna !

-5

Jonathan Sims was an unexpected candidate for the position of Archivist, following Gertrude Robinson’s rather abrupt retirement (Elias still wasn’t sure if she was actually telling the truth when she said she wanted to spend more time travelling with her grandson. He didn’t even know if she actually had a grandson.) When word got out that there was an opening for head archivist, it surprised both Elias and Jon’s manager when he put his application into the pool. While Jon wasn’t the highest position in Research, he wasn’t at the lowest tier either, and everyone knew that being Head Archivist was much like being the mayor of a ghost town. Sure, you had a fancy title, but not much else. The Archives were in the basement, they were cold and dusty, and typically, if a budget needed to be cut, it was the Archives that took the brunt of the slashes. But, Jon was organized, faked his confidence well enough, was willing to put in the work, and, if Elias was being honest with himself, there wasn’t exactly a queue out the door to take over the vacancy that Gertrude left. 

The interview went well enough, though Jon was clearly filled with nervous excitement. He kept reaching up to tuck his hair behind his ear - it was too short to stay in place, but much too long to not be a bother. His voice almost echoed in Elias’ office, strong and precise, even when he struggled with some questions that Elias asked about his strengths and weaknesses. Elias appreciated the way that Jon carried himself, the slight aura of grandeur and pride that he seemed to give off, contrasting starkly with his awkward attempts at being personable. 

Though Elias told Jon that he’ll be in touch within a few days to inform him whether or not he’ll be transferred to the Archives, he’s already certain that there’s no better candidate, and, if nothing else, he loathes having new hires from outside the Institute. He can overlook a few missing qualifications if it means he can cut down on the number of interviews he has to conduct. 

Elias waited a few more days, finished up more interviews, and found his suspicions were correct. Jon - despite the roughness around his edges, and his lack of a library sciences degree (an aspect that makes Rosie raise her eyebrows at Elias when he mentions it) - is the best fit for the archives that Elias has. He calls Jon into his office again, watching as Jon delicately maneuvers into the chair on the other side of Elias’s desk, fingers picking at the sleeves of his cardigan.

“I’m happy to tell you, Jonathan, that after much consideration, that you have been promoted to Head Archivist. Your transfer from the Research department will be put through promptly, and - unless you have any objections - you can begin your new role as soon as next Monday. Congratulations.”

As Elias spoke, he watched as Jon’s eyes widened, eyebrows raise, as the tension melted out of his shoulders. The corners of his lips seemed to flicker, wanting to curl upwards, but not quite able to.

“I, oh, wow. Thank you, Elias. I, uh, I’m really excited to be working in the Archives.” Jon stammered out. His voice had less of the confident bravado that it had during his interview, and while that would usually make Elias reconsider his choice, the fact that all of Jon’s nervous ticks seemed to have disappeared sated his concern.  

Elias nodded, hummed, and launched into the less fun aspect of promotion, namely discussion of new contracts, pay raises, the fact that Jon would be able to ask some of his co-workers to become his assistants, but any vacancies will be filled at Elias’s discretion. Jon nodded along and asked the appropriate questions at the right time.

Perhaps he’s just bad at expressing emotions, Elias thought, though the thought is both fleeting and insignificant. It gets pushed out of the way, quickly, and is discarded, not to be thought again. 

When the meeting was over, Elias stood up to show Jon to the door. Just before Jon left, Elias stuck his hand out, and once again said, “Congratulations, Jon.”

Jon looked startled for a second, before reaching out and giving Elias a hearty handshake.

“Thank you, Elias, really,” Jon replied. While saying that, the corner of his mouth twitched once again, and for a moment, Jon’s face began to break out into a smile. Eyes excited and bright, before he schooled his expression back into one of vaguely happy neutrality. 

Elias released Jon’s hand, and when his office was once again empty of everyone except himself, he briefly wondered why anyone cares enough about smiling to prevent themselves from doing it.

Like most intrapersonal thoughts, though, Elias waved it away, going back to his own work, just glad that he didn’t have to get Rosie to put up any more job listings on Linkedin. 

-4

Tim was surprised when Jon approached him with the job offer. Sure, he and Jon had worked together for a few years and Jon frequently complimented Tim on his work and whenever Jon actually showed up to work get-togethers, he seemed to awkwardly stick to Tim’s side like glue until the event was done. But Jon always declined Tim’s invites to non-work social gatherings, and sometimes it was hard to tell if the snark in Jon’s voice came from malice or…. Something else. 

Tim had chalked all that up to awkwardness or to Jon’s work ethic, but for some reason, he never thought that Jon actually considered Tim to be a friend, even though he did tentatively think of Jon as one. So it was rather shocking when Jon marched up to him, a small stack of papers in his hands at the end of the workday, and announced, 

“I’ve been promoted to Head Archivist.”

“Oh, well, congrats, Jon,” Tim said, smiling. He clapped Jon on the shoulder. “Yeah, I heard you put your application in.” Tim didn’t mention that he heard because some of their co-workers were making jokes about hoping to see the last of Jon, with his insane work ethic and snappish remarks. 

Jon nodded. “I’m also allowed to pick my own assistants since many of Gertrude’s have quit or been reassigned since her absence.”

“That’s cool.”

“I was wondering if you would like to join me in the Archives, Tim.”

“Oh,” Tim said, eyes widening. Jon looked straight at him, unflinching, though his hands were curled into tight balls at his sides. This was certainly unexpected. 

“I think we work well together. You do really good work, and while I’m not exactly sure what… extra work transferring to the archives will entail, I’m that your presence will be beneficial.” Finally, Jon broke Tim’s gaze. “Also, I… quite enjoy your company.”

“Wow, well, thank you, Jon,” Tim managed to stammer out. He looked at Jon’s now sheepish expression and how his cheeks had taken on a slightly red tinge from the honesty. “Uh, can I… think about it? For a few days? It’s just… kind of a big change.”

“Oh, of course, Tim,” Jon nodded earnestly, passing Tim the stack of papers, which Tim now saw as a would-be employment contract, with different sections highlighted, presumably the parts that Jon thought Tim would find important. Jon made like he was about to turn to leave before he paused and said, “Also I. I won’t be offended if you decide to stay put.”

“Oh, I know,” Tim said, even though he wasn’t sure why he knew. Jon nodded again.

“Well, see you tomorrow.” And with that and a brief wave, Jon walked away, leaving Tim to stare at the employment papers and to think about what to do. And Tim did consider it. He had a pretty good thing going on in the Research department. He was well-liked, and many of his managers said that he could probably get promoted to a higher position with a better salary in a few years, and though the entry position of archival assistant was better paying than his current gig, Tim knew he was never going to get promoted from that role. 

Tim had friends in Research, but he also had friends in artifacts, and finance, and HR. The more he thought about it, it wasn’t like his work-social life would end if he went to the basement. And, as much as his co-workers liked to poke fun at Jon, Tim did genuinely enjoy his company. He liked his wit, and snark, and the way he tried to play off his awkwardness and usually failed. And despite his somewhat clumsy attempts at socializing, anytime Tim talked about his life outside of work, Jon listened, made jokes, and was friendly. 

Jon was also quite easy on the eyes, in his own strange way. 

Tim found it wasn’t really much of a hard decision after all. So when he walked into work the next day and tossed the signed contract on Jon’s desk, all he said was, “It better not be as dusty as everyone says it is.” 

Before walking off to his own desk to finish up his own projects, for a moment he thought he saw Jon duck his head to smile. But when he looked back, Jon was just holding the contract, and though his eyes were happy, his face was straight. 

-3

Sasha enjoyed her work as an archival assistant, despite all the dust, and Jon’s moodiness, and the strange errands that the statements sent everyone on. It was an unorthodox job, cleaning up the decades of bizarre filing that Gertrude left, hunting down follow-ups from people who were clearly drunk, sick, or delirious at the time that these ‘occurrences’, well, occurred. 

She certainly enjoyed her co-workers, basement dwellers that they were. While archives and research had many employees and had been on floors where different departments mingled, the four of them - Tim, Sasha, Martin, and Jon - were stuck down in the cool basement, surrounded by files, and books, and old foundation. While she had been on amicable terms with Tim before, the forced proximity brought them much closer, and she was happy to meet and befriend Martin. Pretty quickly the three of them began to go out for drinks after work, plan dinners, and movie nights, and get-togethers on weekends. They sometimes invited Jon, but the answer was also unanimously no.

Still, despite Jon’s rebuffs at having a social life, Sasha always felt like her relationship with him was… different than the others. While Tim and Jon had prior acquaintanceship, Sasha only briefly knew Jon in research; and Jon was either oblivious or blatantly ignoring Martin’s crush on him, rebuffing his attempts of flirting and courtship with harsh words and mumbled, unfocused ‘thank yous’ when Martin brought him tea. 

It surprised her how highly Jon thought of her, and how well they got on. 

“Here’s that statement you were after,” Sasha said, after knocking on Jon’s office door. Jon turned in his chair to face her, hand outreached to take the folder when she got close enough.

“Thank you, Sasha,” Jon said, as he grasped the folder. Sasha nodded and was about to let go when she glanced down and saw Jon’s hand.

“Is that nail polish?” She asked suddenly, voice coming out more accusatory than she intended. Jon snatched the folder away from her, curling his fingers into his palms as soon as the paper hit the desk surface. He still wore his face of neutrality, but his jaw was tense. Sasha was surprised at how defensive, and how quickly, Jon reacted to the question, but immediately saw she needed to remedy it. She quickly added, “It looks nice.”

As soon as the compliment was said, Jon seemed to relax a bit. His jaw unclenched and slowly he unfurled his fingers. His nails were a simple black, though it was a messy job and they were already chipping. 

“Oh, thank you.” He said softly.

“Did you do them yourself?” Sasha asked, even though she couldn’t imagine Jon asking for help to do his nails.

“Yes, er. As a child, I always wanted to paint my nails but I couldn’t, so.” He held up his hands, wiggling his fingers. “They’re not very good, are they?”

Sasha shrugged. “Pretty good for a first time, though. Next time you’ll want to push your cuticles back first, and you should probably get a varnish too. It’ll stop them from chipping so much.”

“Oh, okay. Thank you, Sasha,” Jon said, clearly not expecting advice. Sasha gave one last nod, and a, “No problem.” before leaving Jon’s office. 

After that - or maybe Sasha just noticed it more afterwards - Jon seemed to come to work ‘prettied up’ more often. He seemed to listen to her nail advice, and while he often sported plain, black nails - sans chipping, thanks to the nice clear coat he put on - a few times he came into work with blue, or red, or green nails. While Martin and Tim always complimented them, if they noticed, Jon began going up to Sasha to show her every fresh set. Often it would be a week or two between appearances; Jon seemed to just let the previous coat chip off completely before repainting them, approaching Sasha with his hands curled in a way so that he could view his own nails before showing them off to her. Sasha always made sure that she seemed excited to see them, even if they weren’t always that good. The way that Jon seemed to loosen after every compliment, the way his face would soften just a tad made it worth it. 

Soon it became their little routine, even as Jon’s habits changed. While it started with nails, soon Jon would awkwardly approach her to show off the fancy braid he just learned how to do with his growing hair. Often, they were messy and uneven, large strands falling out of the cheap hair ties, but Sasha would say it was nice, before offering to fix it for him. Jon always declined, disappearing into his office and coming out later, braid abandoned and hair in its usual neat bun, but Sasha always offered. For a while, Jon had taken to looking at the clothes Sasha came to work in, awkwardly complimenting her on whatever coat or blouse or shoes she had worn. It took Sasha a few times to realize what he was saying - or at least thinking. 

“I like your skirt,” Jon mumbled one day, as he and Sasha walked into the archives. “It’s very pretty.”

Sasha hummed, looking down at it. It wasn’t anything fantastic, just a black a-line skirt with a vaguely plaid pattern, long enough to be work-appropriate without annoying her. She mostly wore it because the growing pile of dirty laundry in her flat left her few other options. 

“Thank you, Jon,” she replied, before pursing her lips. “You know, I think you would look quite nice in a skirt.”

A bold move, Sasha knew, but after Jon sputtered for a moment, he managed to choke out, “You… you do?”

“Oh, yes. You got nice, slender legs, and if one a little longer it would just add to the frumpy librarian look quite nicely.” Sasha laughed a little, unable to resist the urge to tease a little. Jon gave a polite chuckle and nodded. 

They repeated this process a few more times, over a few weeks. Jon would give Sasha a sincere, if not a bit bumbling compliment on her wardrobe or appearance (often for items Sasha did not care for that much) and after thanking him, she would flip it around and say, “I think this lipgloss colour would suit you better than me” or " a blouse like this would make your collarbones look good” or even being as bold as saying “You should get a dress like it, then we can match.” 

Jon would brush the comments off with a laugh or a denial, but Sasha could see the wheels in his head-turning, the way he would occasionally look at whatever pair of pants he was wearing that day and frown. 

Eventually, Sasha’s hard and not-so-subtle work paid off when she saw Jon shuffle into the archives, not in his usual attire of plain cardigan and button-up, tucked into a pair of boring pants, but with a new look: a cardigan and plain button-up tucked into a shockingly boring skirt. It suited him, though; the long grey fabric skimming his ankles, the way it would flow behind and the way his feet would kick it in front. Jon’s fingers seemed to be absent-mindedly twisting themselves into the fabric, as he made his way towards his office.

Sasha was right; Jon did rock the frumpy librarian look.

“Good morning, Jon,” Sasha greeted, cheerfully. Jon looked up.

“Morning, Sasha.”

“New wardrobe?” She asked, nodding at his outfit. Jon seemed to falter a little, standing still, waiting for her assessment. “I like it! Really suits you.”

And while that was a bit of a lie - Sasha found it to be a bit boring, and she would never have even considered buying herself, though it did quite Jon wonderfully - Sasha couldn’t bring herself to feel the least bit bad, when she heard Jon mutter a soft, “Thank you,” before hurrying to his office. For a split second, Sasha would have sworn that his lips were pulled into a smile, thought for a moment she saw a flash of his teeth, but he was opening and closing his office door before she could confirm.

-2

Despite all her grumbling, thrown insults, and jabs, Melanie didn’t actually dislike Jon. Well, no, she did dislike him, immensely. He’s smug, and rude, and has a know-it-all attitude, and he absolutely did not take her show seriously. But, behind all of that, he respected her abilities and her competence, if not the way that she uses it. She thought of it like she wouldn’t want anything to hurt Jon unless it was her giving him a good slap around the head. 

Still, when she ended up hanging around the Archives more - and shockingly, no one, not even Jon, tried to stop her - after her show fell apart and took most of her professional network with it, she’s surprised how much common ground she shares with Jon. At first, they needed someone else in the room with them, to grease the wheels of conversation - either Sasha siding with Melanie every once in a while, or a well-timed joke from Tim, or Martin’s placating tone - but every time they found themselves able to stand each other without any assistance, even starting their own conversation. Without her show, with its staged dramatics and clickbait titles to feed Jon’s antagonisms, they find that they have similar opinions and histories with the supernatural. 

“Most statements and stories are completely false,” Jon had repeated many times. But soon he began to add, “But the ones that are real are… deeply concerning, and hard to come by.”

More than a few times Jon had caught Melanie digging through filing cabinets, looking for a statement with a shred of truth in it, anything to follow up or make a story out of. After the third time that Jon threw open the door to the filing room and nearly gave himself a heart attack when the light illuminated Melanie’s hunch over figure, reading through a pile of folders that she most certainly was not going to put away properly, Jon sighed and asked, “Why don’t I just give you some statements that seem real.”

Melanie looked up from the file in her hand that she was about to discard. “You’d do that? Isn’t that against ‘policy’ or something.”

Jon rolled his eyes. “I’m sure it’s no more breaking rules than allowing you in here in the first place.” He eyed the pile of statements on the floor, the open drawer with crumbled papers shoved in. “Besides, I’m tired of having to spend an entire day refiling after you pop in.”

And so, Jon started keeping track of statements he believes. First on sticky notes, then on looseleaf paper, and eventually in a notebook so that Melanie can keep track as she goes along, Jon wrote down the name and case number of what he believes are credible cases, and Melanie dug them out of their dusty tombs. Even if she didn’t put them away - which she rarely did, can’t go making Jon’s life too easy, she thought with a grin - it was clear that he appreciated knowing exactly where they came from. She still browsed around, skimming through statements that Jon doesn’t believe, but she puts those ones back where she finds them if they weren't worth her time. 

Their strange friendship continued like that for a few months. They steered clear of personal topics, even, no, especially,  as Melanie began going on dates with Georgie. Occasionally, a personal detail would slip in; Jon mentioned that he hates denim skirts after telling Melanie about a statement that, for some reason, explicitly mentions them (“And what makes you an expert on what women should wear?” Melanie asked, annoyance clear in her. 

Jon furrowed his eyebrows. “What? No, I’m talking about me. I hate wearing denim skirts.”

“Oh,” Melanie says, the wind coming out of her sails. “Uh, me too.”). At one point Melanie mentioned that she loves artificial blue raspberry, which made Jon scrunch his nose in disgust. Before they knew it, Melanie and Jon knew about the other’s thoughts on movies, books, fashion, the weather, politics, animals, food, and whether or not Rosie is dating that one woman from HR.

It was a slow and gradual shift, one that caught both of them off guard. But neither was anxious to prevent it and really, Melanie was kind of interested to see where it would go. It’s with that thought in mind, seeing how this will go, that she throws a folder onto Jon’s desk. He hadn’t looked up when she knocked and entered without waiting, but with the manila folder obscuring whatever paperwork he was doing, he sighs and lifts his head. 

“Yes, Melanie?”

“This statement was misfiled,” Melanie said, glee and gloating oozing out of her voice. She cackled when she saw Jon scowl, arms crossing automatically. He glanced down at the casefile.

“It most certainly was not,” Jon huffed, picking it up. He doesn’t even mention how it wasn’t a file he gave her, so keen to prove her wrong. “It was filed by year, 2006, subsection ‘non-human creature’, subsection ‘false’ and-”

“Exactly,” Melanie interrupted. “It’s not fake.”

“What do you mean it’s not fake.” Jon narrowed his eyes. “It’s about a bloody sea monster!”

“A sea monster which is described in another statement from 1984,” Melanie threw another folder onto his desk, which Jon hadn’t noticed in her hand in his haste to disagree, “And, one that causes damage similar to this accident report,” Melanie unlocked her phone and shoved it into Jon’s face. His eyes crossed and squinted as he tried to read the news article on the screen. “Which, by the way, all occur in the same region of the Barents Sea.”

Jon lifted his eyes from the phone screen, still slightly glaring at Melanie. He looked away after a second, raising a hand to scratch the side of his face.

“Well, then, I guess we will have to look into it some more,” his voice was different than what Melanie was used to. Behind the movement of his hand, Melanie thought she saw some falses of teeth and saw a slight twinkle in his eye. He quickly dropped his face, expression and voice back to normal, “But, this is not permission for you to go back to rummaging through my files!”

Melanie grinned wolfishly, putting a hand on her hip. The gentle voice and expression were already leaving her mind. “Like I ever needed your permission, Jon.”

-1

It was almost surprising how well Daisy got on with Jon. She supposed it was because they were both a bit quieter than the people around them, got a bit more drained from human interaction than others, a bit more like old souls. Only, Daisy was more of an ‘old soul’ because the thought of all the therapy she had to go through years ago still made her tired and because she was literally about fifteen years older than everyone else in the Archives. 

“Why is it that your joints hurt more than mine even though you’re a baby?” Daisy asked, after finding Jon laying on the floor of his office, hair and dress fanned out on the floor. When she had questioned his state, he just mumbled, “m’back hurts.”

Calling him a baby made him grumble more. “I’m not a baby, I am a grown man-”

“More like an old man.” Daisy joked, sitting down cross-legged by his head. “Seriously, you’re too young to be aching this much.”

Jon shrugged, shirt rustling against the carpet. “I’ve always ached. I guess having a desk job just made it worse.”

Daisy nodded. She couldn’t really relate; all her old aches hadn’t been physical, and before the archives all her jobs involved in a lot of moving - whether it was fast food as a teenager, or retail as a young adult, and then the police. 

“You should go to a chiropractor, get a massage.” She suggested.

“Chiropractor and masseuse are two different professions.”

“Piss off, you know what I’m saying.” Jon rolled his eyes and squirmed a bit on the floor. 

“I don’t like the thought of someone… massaging me.”

“It feels really good,” Daisy replies, thinking back to the few massages she had gotten in her life. “And chiropractors don’t really massage, they just snap your joints back into place and then give you weird exercises to do.”

Jon shrugged again and didn’t say anything. Daisy wasn’t sure if it was because he didn’t have anything to say, or if his previous movement made something along his spine twinge. After a minute of silence, with Jon’s face occasionally morphing from boredom to discomfort, Daisy got an idea. 

“Stand up,” she said, getting to her feet herself. Jon looked up, startled.

“Why?”

“Just do it,” Daisy stuck her hand out for Jon to take. With a little effort, Jon sat up, groaning a little, before taking her stand to stand. As soon as he was upright, Daisy reached down to hold Jon from under his armpits.

“Uh, Daisy, what are you doing?” Jon asked, arms sticking straight out, stiff, as Daisy brought his body closer to her.

“I’m going to reset your back,” Daisy said, as Jon’s face squished against her shoulder. “Don’t worry, I’ve done this a few times, it usually helps.”

Jon mumbled something, before yelping when Daisy stood closer to her full height and he was lifted a few inches off the ground. Jon’s arms instinctually went around Daisy’s shoulders, even though she was fully supporting his weight. 

“Okay, you gotta relax your body, untense your muscles- Jon that is the opposite of untensing. There you go, okay, you’re going to hear a crack,” She said, before squeezing Jon into her body, forearms pressed across different parts of his back. There was a loud crack as she felt Jon tighten his arms around her and give a little yell into her shoulder. 

She loosened her grip, but still held him close for a second, just in case. She felt his mouth move against her shirt, and at first, she thought he was mumbling something, but then the movement ceased for a few seconds. Another small movement, and then no motion once again. Finally, she lowered Jon to the floor and released him. He stood, and quickly went to smoothing out his shirt.

“How’d that feel?” Daisy asks, noticing how he wasn’t automatically going back to lie on the ground. Jon stilled for a second, before saying,

“It feels a lot better. Thank you, Daisy.”

+1

Martin knew he wasn’t subtle, at least not when it came to Jon. He knew practically anyone who came down to the Archives could tell he had a crush, knew that his attempts to coddle, and talk to, and make Jon proud were just about as sly as painting a banner that said: “I WANT TO DATE JONATHAN SIMS.”

He almost couldn’t help it. Sure, he had gotten a bit better at not letting Jon treat him like a doormat over the years - sometimes Jon even seemed pleasantly surprised when Martin told him off for being mean - but there was still an undeniable urge to be gentle with him, to treat him kindly, to make him smile. 

Not that anyone had any recollection of Jon smiling - hell, Tim even made a few jokes that Jon was probably in a terrible accident as a smile and ‘broke his smile muscles, but left his annoying muscles intact’. It wasn’t very funny, but Martin and Sasha still laughed. 

Still, in some masochistic kind of way, Martin enjoyed this prolonged courtship. And even though his friends were sure that nothing was advancing, that Martin was still being a pining fool (which wasn’t an inaccurate description) and Jon was still being an unrequiting idiot, Martin was sure that he was making progress. Jon and he were having more… moments. More times where they would make eye contact and Jon’s face would soften, more conversations where Jon would ramble off-topic, at ease and relaxed, before remembering himself and Martin and roping him back into the conversation. There would be times where Martin would pass Jon a cup of tea, mug angled so that Jon could easily grab the handle, and yet Jon would take the mug in such a way that their fingers would brush. Sometimes they even lingered there, the heat of ceramic burning his hand, almost unnoticeable in comparison to the heat of his face as Jon glanced at him through his eyelashes, saying, “Thank you, Martin.”

Maybe it was just because no one else was privy to these moments, or maybe Martin really was just a yearning fool, desperately grasping at anything that suggested Jon returned his affection, but no one else seemed to understand these moments or take them seriously. 

“Your crush is getting out of control,” Tim said one day, after watching Martin bring Jon tea in a mug covered in hearts. “Like, legally speaking, I think it’s too much.”

Martin rolled his eyes. Jon had stared at the mug for a few seconds before taking it, and even though it was still piping hot, much too warm to comfortably drink, he took a sip as soon as it was in his grasp. “This is lovely, Martin. Thank you.”

“Leave it alone, Tim, it’s fine,” Martin replied, going back to sit at his desk. 

“No, it is getting a bit ridiculous,” Sasha agreed. “I mean, how long have you been after him? Like, I love Jon, trust me, but he’s either oblivious or ignoring your, uh, flirting attempts.”

“He’s not ignoring them.”

“So he’s just oblivious?”

“I don’t think so.” Sasha and Tim looked at him strangely. He sighed. “Look, things are fine, okay? It’s fine, just let me… do my thing.”

“Fine, we will ‘let you do your thing’ but, for the record, you probably could have gotten with at least three people in the time that you’ve been lusting after Jon,” Tim said, earning a laugh from Sasha. 

But it was fine, whatever he and Jon had. It was certainly more than what he had been getting before, and even though he wanted more - chest aching at the sight of a frazzled or tired Jon, feeling the need to brush his hair out of his face, to press tender kisses to his eyelids, the near unbearably desire to just hold him, and care for him - Martin wasn’t unhappy. And somehow he knew Jon wasn’t either. 

Sometimes Jon even sought Martin out, intentionally leaving his stuffy office only to walk over to Martin's desk and chat with him for a few minutes before returning. Often he would have to return a minute later, muttering about leaving a pen or a pencil or a hair tie. (One time, as Jon turned around to leave, Martin saw the pen on the edge of his desk, and said, “You left your pen.”

Jon had turned around, looking almost disappointed. “Oh. Yes, thank you, Martin.”

He collected his pen and returned to his office. Martin didn’t see him until he said goodbye for the night. The next time he saw Jon dropping something at his desk, he didn’t mention it.)

When Jon actually remembered to eat lunch now, he would only come out to eat if Martin hadn’t eaten already, as he had taken to sitting either across or directly next to him during meal times. If Jon was sitting next to him - usually because Melanie or Basira were sitting across the shifty breakroom table - Martin could feel Jon gently, almost shyly, pressing his knee against Martin’s leg. Jon’s face was always blank, but if Martin made any move to shift away, Jon’s head would snap towards him until contact was either completely broken or restored. 

Of course, there wasn’t an easy way to explain this to anyone else. How could Martin have possibly hoped to quantify glances, and touches, and the new intonations when Jon said ‘Martin’, the name now completely different than what Jon used to call him, despite no letters changing. How to explain it when no one else seemed to notice the magnitude of these changes if they noticed the changes at all?

So Martin rolled his eyes and made jokes with the others as they teased and prodded him about his ‘crush that was going nowhere on the boss’, and hoped, like so many times before, that Jon couldn’t hear them through his office door.

As pathetic as it sounded, Martin was prepared to play the long game, to continue this dance he and Jon had begun as long as it took, to tolerate the unbearable loneliness that crept up on him at home so long as he got to see Jon at work, to keep bringing him tea every day until, well, until something happened, or until one of them left the archives. Martin had made peace with that fact, though he loathed to admit it, even to himself. 

And then, Jon asked for his help one day. 

“Can you stay late with me this evening? I need some assistance looking into a statement.” Jon had been formal, professional when he asked. 

“Of course,” Martin said, if not because any time spent with Jon was a good time (usually, not even Martin was in deep enough to enjoy some of Jon’s moods), then because he did take his job seriously. “Anything you need.”

“I can stay behind too if you need extra help,” Basira offered, turning to look at Jon.

Jon nodded at her. “Thank you for offering, but I’ll only be needing Martin.”

And he has to admit, hearing that did bring warmth to his face and to his chest.

The help that Jon needed was minimal. Some of it was just reaching a file of a self that was too high since the stepladder that he used to use had broken, and Martin knew that Jon had too much pride to ask for help reaching something when everyone was in. Otherwise, all he needed assistance with was looking over a few files to see if a name popped up in all of them. All in all, it only took about half an hour, including the time it took to re-sort the files and put the relevant ones on Jon’s desk. 

As Martin was preparing to leave, Jon approached him one more time, also clad in his winter coat and bulky scarf tucked under his chin. He stood in front of Martin, looking intently. Martin waited for, well, something. Jon took a deep breath.

“Would- Are you- Do,” Jon scowled at himself, took another breath and reached up to tug his scarf lower again so that more of his face was visible. “Martin, would you like to go out to eat with me?”

“Yeah, of course,” Martin replied, cheeks reddening slightly. Jon paused for a moment.

“I mean this as a date.”

Martin looked at Jon, bundled in his winter wear, hair slightly tangled, fumbling over asking Martin out!

“I knew that’s what you meant,” Martin said with a smile. He looked down at Jon’s hands, clenched tightly into themselves. He reached a hand out and carefully brushed a finger along the knuckles of on. “Of course, I would like to go on a date with you.”

And when he looked up, he saw Jon smiling, and it felt like seeing the stars for the first time. Jon always said he looked much older than he was, which Martin was inclined to agree, but when he smiled, he looked more his age. The tiredness and stress that plagued his expressions disappeared under the glow of his grin, eyes crinkled, and. Dimples. 

Jon had dimples, nestled in between his smile lines, a secret that Martin knew he was now the only one in the Institute besides Jon who knew they existed. 

“You have dimples,” Martin said, a smile creeping onto his own face. “They’re cute.”

Jon sputtered a, “No they’re not!” and Martin could see he was trying to return his face to its usually impassive expression, but it seemed that every time he got close, his grin would break through. Eventually, Jon tugged his scarf up to cover his mouth, but Martin still saw his eyes crinkled, somehow still felt Jon smiling through the layers.

“They’re cute,” Martin repeated, wanting to pull Jon’s scarf down again. This want was different than what he usually felt, a desire not tinged with sadness or loss. Maybe it was presumptuous, but Martin knew that this urge would be met. Maybe not now, but soon. 

And Martin thought about Jon’s smile, even when he asked, voice muffled behind the layers of wool, where Martin wanted to go to eat, and would Martin like to walk, transit or take a cab there, and, and and.

Martin thought about Jon’s smile, knowing he was one of the few people to see it, knowing that he would get to see it again

[aubrey-plaza]

I just had an exam today and didn't sleep in like 27 hs and I don't want to sleep bc is so fucking early and I was thinking if you could do me some board games Staubrey headcanons? I'd give you my soul, oh great devil.

I have so many other headcanon asks in my inbox but you need to stay up Vee!

And also I’m in the bathroom at a houseboat party writing this bc it’s Pride and I’m HELLA drunk but LESGO

Aubrey kills at Monopoly and it’s a little scary. Like, she’ll take advantage of the housing shortage and she is also ALWAYS the banker and she gets the good properties and she barters like a champ and Stacie never realises she’s given away a key piece of property until Aubrey builds four houses on the street and charges everybody crazy rent and Stacie realises they’re all FUCKED.

(sometimes she gets mad because Aubrey is using her business-school knowledge for evil and in an effort to derail the game she’ll accuse Aubrey of cheating and a shouting match will ensue and the game doesn’t end but it also means Aubrey doesn’t get to have that evil moment where she slowly chokes them out of their last money)

(Stacie loves her girlfriend but Aubrey absolutely will insist on continuing the game until the very end and Stacie really hates herself for how hot she is for evil-Aubrey)

Stacie kills at Scrabble because she knows all of the good science words but she’s also always very good at combining the triple word and double letter scores and Aubrey’s not even surprised anymore when Stacie finishes a game with 300 points while they’re all struggling to 100

(Aubrey doesn’t really mind Stacie winning at Scrabble because she can appreciate Stacie’s insane knowledge of words and Stacie gets so cute when she wins at Scrabble because it’s so pure and she loves her girlfriend so much).

Stacie is also somehow always good at the Game of Life and contrary to Scrabble, she’s not cute about it. She’s the most smug person in the world when she’s winning at Life. Aubrey hates how Stacie will always get to retirement first with a great salary and kids and a massive house and she never has to pay for anything and she never gets caught by natural disasters and it’s just not fair

“This game isn’t a competition!” Aubrey will say, trying not to show how annoyed she is when Stacie picks a card for a great job.

“It is and I’m winning at it!” Stacie says smugly when she finds out she also gets to live in a big house.

Sometimes, when Stacie’s feeling particularly like annoying Aubrey, when she gets to the marriage part she’ll reach for Aubrey’s car and take out Aubrey’s little pink person and put it in her own car and says, “Look, we’re married now babe, now at least you’ll succeed at life,” and it genuinely takes all of Aubrey’s willpower not to threaten to withhold sex.

There are several games that are banned from Bellas game night due to Aubrey and Stacie’s competitive nature.

Chloe, while usually not all that competitive when it comes to boardgames, becomes obsessed with winning whenever Stacie and Aubrey team up and Beca loves it because there is FINALLY a situation in which Chloe isn’t completely team Aubrey and so it basically becomes Stacie and Aubrey vs Beca and Chloe and as a result, the games that are banned are:

Taboo (Stacie and Aubrey have too many inside jokes and use it to cheat while guessing words)

Sorry! (there’s a rule that you always have to take someone’s pawn in the game which has resulted in way too many screaming matches and at one point, Stacie threatening to burn Beca’s Bellas scarf, already reaching for the bag she knows Beca keeps her scarf in that had led to Beca literally throwing the game out the window)

Mastermind (Lilly ruins it for everybody when she gets the colour pattern correct on the first try)

Operation (Stacie has a very steady hand but not when Chloe starts talking about how she used to share a wall with Aubrey and before Stacie was in the picture, the blonde would bring people home and Chloe could hear Aubrey having sex and she loves telling these stories because Stacie gets jealous as hell and angry as hell and while being angry focuses Aubrey, it has the opposite effect on Stacie)

Candyland (HOW does Chloe manage to cheat at a game designed for children? Nobody will ever understand but in any case, it’s been banned preventatively)

Ticket to Ride (Aubrey and Stacie have purposefully blocked a necessary road out of spite and to then make out between turns which had led to Beca subtly stealing train carriages from the two, but Aubrey always counts her train carriages before and during the game (bc she’s a master strategist) and catches Beca but before Aubrey can do anything, Stacie crawls into her lap and starts really making out with her, moaning exaggeratedly and scaring everybody out of the room)

Uno (no explanation needed)

that doesn’t leave a lot of boardgames and Emily, sweet innocent summer child Emily, one day brings over Risk. All of the Bellas take one look at the box and disappear and Emily is left standing confused in the kitchen with Aubrey, Stacie, Beca and Chloe.

Chloe looks at the box apprehensively but Emily says she’s never played it before and that’s the only reason Chloe doesn’t ban the game outright.

“You two need to give her a chance,” Beca warns as they start setting up and Stacie turns to Aubrey, who narrows her eyes.

Aubrey leans close and whispers something into her ear and Stacie nods once and the game starts. They wipe out Beca in no time and a few rounds later, Chloe is out. Chloe’s counselling Emily, who is either having a bout of beginner’s luck or has natural talent for Risk because she slowly starts taking more and more countries from Stacie and Aubrey.

“Wait, what?” Emily says suddenly, when she rolls two sixes and takes Australia from Aubrey.

“You win,” Aubrey says with a small smile.

“Really?!” Emily shouts and when Aubrey nods, she gets up to do her terrible but endearing victory dance.

Stacie and Aubrey exchange a look and Beca’s immediately suspicious.

“What was that?” she asks, pointing between the two.

“What was what?” Stacie asks innocently.

“That look that you just—” Beca tries to say.

Emily leaves the room to go tell the other Bellas that she’s beaten Aubrey and Stacie and Beca and Chloe at Risk and Aubrey smiles coyly at Beca, leans against Stacie when the brunette wraps an arm around her.

“You let her win,” Beca whispers, scandalised and Chloe looks at them with her mouth open in surprise.

“YOU LET HER WIN?” Chloe screeches but Beca immediately shushes her. “How dare you,” Chloe hisses.

“How dare we let Legacy have a win?” Stacie says, giving them away.

“It was her first time playing, we’re not monsters,” Aubrey adds.

“You never let anybody win ever,” Beca complains in annoyance.

“Oh, it’s never going to happen again,” Aubrey says.

“We’re gonna crush her next time,” Stacie says and Aubrey turns to her with a wide smile and Stacie holds up her hand for a high five that Aubrey happily gives her.

“Absolutely,” Aubrey says and Beca and Chloe both look horrified.

“You are monsters.”