#not fitting in

[moonshadow-thoughts]

Do you ever feel like you don't belong anywhere? Like there is no place and no people for you?

[reality-detective]

Not fitting in has become something to be proud of when the norm is so screwed up!

Swimming against the current is not easy and it can be exhausting, but there’s a great sense of pride and purpose in standing by what’s right regardless of society’s dictated ‘normality’.

We must each nourish our uniqueness and share our different perspectives, but above all we must do what is honest, what is right and what is moral.

As much as they have tried to blur the lines, deep down we all know when we have crossed the line and as much as you can try to justify your actions by claiming they did not negatively affect anyone, how will they affect you?

Remember, loving yourself is the basis for fighting for what you are worth, for not settling for less, for not complying, for claiming your sovereignty and for not relinquishing your freedom.

Everytime you do something without integrity you are devaluing yourself and your own self esteem will be deminished. You will lose power and strength.

Righteous living is the greatest source of spiritual, mental and physical power, and right now nothing fits less into society than living with truth and integrity, so let’s do just that!🤔

[definitelynotaflower]

this summer, a short part of a longer poem of mine. something about being half-child, something about not being able to ever know your family. idk if i wanna finish this tbh, idk if anyone would read it

[weak-is-the-flesh]

never being a part of anything // A little life, Hanya Yanagihara // Eleven A.M., Edward Hopper // First Love / Late Spring - Mitski // Q Train, Nigel Van Wieck // Poem by Bodil Malmsten (translated) // I am alone but not lonely, Jon Rafman // The nutritionist, Andrea Gibson // Soundsuits, Nick Cave // Rhytm 0, Marina Abramovich // Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, Jonathan Safran Foer // Christina's World, Andrew Wyeth //

[opossums-in-a-trenchcoat]

Fr getting annoyed at being called shy

I’m not shy. I’ve never been shy. But my whole life I’ve been called shy.

I’m quiet, reserved, I keep to myself. I don’t like to stay in conversations where I feel like I’m not being listened to. I’m chill, I like to listen and observe more than I like to participate. I don’t move very quickly, I don’t speak very loud.

When I’m with people I’m close to and when I’m excited or in the right environment, I can be very excitable and hyper and fun and laughing. I am outgoing and confident and NOT SHY. Especially being autistic, I know I move and act in a way that people interpret as nervousness, but I’m really just letting my body do it’s thing.

When people label me as shy I see it as an excuse to not get to know me.

Nothing wrong with being shy btw, I just don’t fit that description personally.

[aeshnacyanea2000]

There was nothing like that not fitting in feeling to stimulate the old magical nerves; that was why Esme was so good at it. In Agnes’s case this had manifested itself in a tendency to wear soppy black lace gloves and pale makeup and call herself Perdita plus an initial from the arse of the alphabet.

Terry Pratchett - Maskerade

[pstabs]

QTCinderella Is Someone I'm Vibing With

I'm watching this YouTube video by Anthony Padilla from about a week ago that features QTCinderella. I've known that she's a Twitch streamer and a fairly big one. I also know that she's dating Ludwig. I watch Ludwig on YouTube. I never really bothered to go to her channel because I have my faves. But now this interview has me regretting not watching her sooner.

The interview opens with her saying:

"I wasn't too popular in high school. I never felt like I fit in anywhere and even in this industry [content creation], I felt like 'man they look like they're having so much fun. I wish I got invited.' Or like 'I wish I could be a part of that'. And so I was like 'well if I'm not getting invited to stuff, why don't I just invite people'. I've always, always, always, my entire life, wanted to feel included and so if I can be that person that makes other people feel included, I'm going to do anything I can to be that person"

She mentions being raised Mormon and never being good enough. I was raised Evangelical Christian and the never being good enough thing exists there as well. I'm not sure if it's just coincidence or if it's a thing with religion in general. But man do I feel this from her.

And damn if she didn't get me crying when she teared up talking about how her mother accepted her as she was. I want this. I want people who accept me how I am. Most ppl just want me to change a bunch of things.

"Sometimes you don't notice that the music is on until it's off."

Even the reason she started streaming speaks to me.

I'm so pathetic right now and ugly crying that I tweeted at her. I'm stupid. I shouldn't have tweeted at someone that famous because now I'm that person but IDK she just described how I navigated 2022. It was literally 5 seconds at a time sometimes.

[beautifulbookishdisaster]

This life was never ours. We were only ever borrowing it.

Emily St. John Mandel, Station Eleven (Miranda)

[bish-plz-haha]

Not knowing where you fit in is the hardest thing in the world. You are adrift in a sea of possibilities and you cant seem to find something that suits you. It's not a fun feeling. Are people actually your friends? Do they actually care about you?

"I am not okay

And I need you to see it

I have so much to say

And no one to hear it

The reason I keep quiet

With so much at stake

I always feel like a burden, let it silence me

You'll never understand

Why it's so hard to say

I'll never have the words, I can't explain this hell

But what if it kills me

If I keep it to myself?"

[souls-tongue]

Watch "Henry rollins -I know you-" on YouTube

[moonshadow-thoughts]

I often see people who's relationship ended and they manage to find a new partner within weeks or months. Or people who's friendship ended and they have new friends within a few weeks or months.

And it leaves me puzzled how people manage to do that, because I've spend years and years to find a friend or a partner and failed every time.

Yet it seems to be so easy for other people.

[l-a-l-o-u]

sending your friends terrible tumblr posts is a love language

[bellqmione]

wheelchairs and canes and glasses and hearing aids and every single other disability aid should be free btw and if you disagree i hate you

[blorbopolis]

im cooking

[feminineambrosia]

A great day for a ride

[cloud-ya]

outcast of the village