"How did Shuro think he could marry Falin when he hated her brother?" you have to understand. Toshiro is from a whole different country. In his head he and Falin would move back to the Eastern Archipelago and they'd see Laios twice a year tops. You can pretend to get along with in-laws you don't like for a few days a year, people do that all the time.
The actual flaw in his plan– which shows he doesn't really understand either of the Touden siblings– is the fact that if the plot hadn't happened and Falin had for some reason said yes to his proposal, Laios would have packed his bags and moved away with them instantly.
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Need a the Waynes Lived AU where Martha’s a vampire. She snuck in a Wayne Gala for a potential late night snack, but Thomas thought she was a socialite.
“So, what do you do?”
“I drain people of their life sources.”
“Oh, you’re a CEO too?”
She can’t drink Thomas’ blood because he smokes too much, the baggy eyes indicate long nights spent on his feet during surgery, which means it’ll taste bitter, and she saw him drown 10 whiskey shots in one go.
It’s a taste thing, nothing against him.
He is, how ever, very handsome, and she decided she’ll be his house cat for the time being. Fast forward two years later and they have a vampire cherub of a baby named Bruce.
Babies usually don’t come out with fangs and tiny bat wings, so, yeah. His wife’s a vampire. Cool.
“How come I’ve never seen your wife outside during the daytime, Tom??”
“How come I’ve never seen you mind your own fucking business?”
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the funniest parallel between Tim and Damian that no one ever talks about is how they're both the epitome of "I know a guy" because they keep managing to pick up random friends wherever they go
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ok. icebreaker-type question. imagine time travel exists, but all of the serious super big things that likely come to mind when time travel is a factor is stuff youre not “qualified” for, as a civilian. what stupid, petty, thing do you use time travel for?
personally, i’d buy this one limited-time pin from a con i had no chance of going to, and also buy some transformers animated toys while they were still being sold.
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it’s so fucking embarrassing to find a conventionally attractive man attractive every time it happens. like oh you think the handsome man is handsome? you find the attractive guy attractive? derivative. passé. pedestrian
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the way that one line from the new epilogue in an astarion romance is going to HAUNT me
just. what a profoundly intense thing to confess to someone.
like, just these six months of newfound happiness with you exerts a force on his heart equal and in direct opposition to two centuries of endless torment, the gnawing hunger and exploitation. this flashbulb-bright fraction of his long life holds the same gravity to him as years upon years of darkness and suffering.
in all likelihood, he hasn’t even known his lover for as long as his worst memory lasted, that year sealed away to go mad from starvation and sensory deprivation, yet he still tells them this brief time has been so fundamentally and powerfully important that the weight of even that unimaginable hell is vanishingly small compared to this present he has now and the future ahead of them both.
how am i supposed to act normal about this.
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Bonus questions: how many eggs are you getting? What are you having with them? What would you like to put on top?
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I truly, TRULY do not know how to say this, because the fact that I have to say it makes me feel like I am losing my grip on reality. But no, in the post-capitalistic anarchist utopia, I will not be relying on “autistic minecraft girlies” to be building inspectors because - and this may shock you - one of those occupations takes years of education in how to read and interpret hundreds of thousands of lines of regulations based on complicated math and physics that were the result of decades of tragedy and death, and the other one involves playing a children’s video game.
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