#ofc: Gillian

[jodians]

i knew jodie foster was a real one when i found out that she’s clannibal’s #1 hater

[rottenette]

(me)

[yikesss]

it's so funny that the top ranked ep from s9 is the last one ;) and there are only 2 eps with a score of 8+ on imdb

[hvbris]

For the multimuse game: Effie Trinkett, Lydia Deetz or Gillian Foster 😌

multi - muse game     :     suggest up to three muses for the mun to add to their blog / accepting

YOU KNOW I WANT TO ADD EFFIE 😩❤️ and tbh I HAVE thought about Lydia and Gillian in the past 👀 Lydia has such a great aesthetic and well, it’s hard for me to resist a smart and beautiful woman like Gillian 😳

[halechief]

claire to gillian: let me offer you what google couldn’t. i know what it is to be capable and beautiful and ambitious, and to be on people like sergey and larry’s checklist of things that look good to have on a shelf. i’m not trying to acquisition you. what i see in you is a woman i admire, which doesn’t happen often. i want to enable you. i want to clear the way for you so that you can achieve what you want to achieve. on your own terms.

[wulvercazz]

Do you think Grimm being an omega affected any of his relationship with the other Espadas before Ichigo arrived? Did anyone tease him over how obsessed he got with ALPHA Ichigo?

Oh I definitely dooo 🤭✨ I had several twt threads with some of these ideas so, if u followed me over there, some of these might sound familiar dasfdg

In an omegaverse setting, I headcanon most arrancar (specially the Espadas) to be Alphas. Simply bc it seems to work better for Aizen that way; less Omegas means less bothering with heats being an interruption, and also means more agressive/restless Alphas.

I think the only Omegas would be Ulquiorra and Grimmjow (and Nell too) and for very good reasons.

In my headcanons I usually have only the Hollows (Gillian and up) to be the only ones with a secondary gender, as I think it fits the canon lore that these Hollows are made up of thousands of souls. Aizen would only be posing as the role of an Alpha in his makeshift "pack".

Ulquiorra would make sense to be an Omega with how easily he becomes Aizen's most trusted Espada (+ it fits my own Ulquiorra being sort of infatuated with Aizen headcanons lol)...

But then we have Grimmjow- his role is a bit more complicated in Aizen's plan imo, because he's meant to go rogue and be disloyal. Him being an Omega means Aizen (w that alpha posing I mentioned, along with his canon reiatsu power displays and overall manipulation) can have a better grip on him while also letting him loose.

Before Ichigo- Aizen was already doing the canon play of giving them ranks to keep them competing against each other, making it harder for them to form alliances with each other beyond their own Fracción... but then, if we also push in the omegaverse into it- I can see such few Omegas (one being almost not an omega at all bc I can see Ulquiorra's emptiness fucking up w aspects his secondary gender too) not only affecting the Alphas, like I mentioned before, but keeping said Omegas in high tension environments. More aggressive/hostile, which would only make their necessary fights with Ichigo that much challenging and thus better and achieving the goal of driving forward Ichigo's Hollow. (And also it'd fit too with Nnoitra's sexist lil displays of aggression, attacking and injuring Nell, and then trying the same with Grimmjow).

When Ichigo doeS appear and Grimmjow becomes obsessed- it only helps along with Grimm's spiraling "out of control" and into his own destruction (not on Ichigo's watch ofc, but I can see Aizen meaning for Grimmjow to die there), that the Alphas he's constantly in competition with, start to show some disdain and judgement for it.

Maybe u wanted something more light hearted now that I think about it adsfdf 😅 but tbh I can see Espadas like Nnoitra, Szayel, Ulquiorra and Yammy (specially the two in higher ranks) to be kinda nasty- lots of "slut"-shaming and goading.

And then... if we go with 'Grimmjow actually having the hots for Ichigo' too-- oof- I can see his scent change stirring up things within the arrancar- for sort of good, bad and worst.

A competing Alpha scent all over Grimmjow (particularly after Ichigo 'marks' him with a scar) could make higer ranked Alpha Espadas to want to act on the "challenge", whether towards Grimmjow or Ichigo.

But also,,, I can see the change also helping along some of the arrancar that are not quite in with Aizen's whole thing, like Harribel, to start embracing that defiance even more. Grimmjow stops smelling like pack (like Aizen's overpowering reiatsu) and more like someone else (Ichigo's just as overpowering reiatsu) and this causes shifts along the whole little system Aizen has going on; specially with those at the top- Harribel and Starrk in particular strike me as the type who slowly start detaching from the "pack" and readjusting (if only Starrk wasn't offed when he was... I can see him choosing to quietly follow Harribel rather than wanting to lead himself u_u). Barragan and Yammy I can see as striving to take control... if only the culmmination of Aizen's plan and his defeat hadn't happened so soon after, maybe some more actual physical confrontations would've happened between the Espadas. 🤔

I can totally see these little things going mostly undetected too by Aizen simply bc shinigami don't seem perceptive to scent/ pheromones/ Hollow-specific body language, being more human themselves... although I say 'mostly' bc Ulquiorra would definitely fill Aizen in on the gossip.

[altocat]

U know since we're getting more info on Angeal in EC I'm going to assume we might get more stuff on his family as well which leads me to this:

Any headcanons on u got on his father?(not hollender ofc)

The only thing we really know about Angeal's adopted father was that he worked himself to death before gifting the Buster Sword to his son. He dies shortly before Angeal enlists in the Wutai War. So I have a few headcanons.

Daddo did NOT know about the Jenova Project, but knew that Angeal wasn't his son. He married Gillian when she was pregnant and unquestioningly raised Angeal as his own the way a real father should.

He was a warm and loving person. And had an interest in gardening, which is why his son takes up the hobby later on in life. Said gardening was often a way to get some extra food on the table whenever they were starving.

Big man. HUGE man. A man of very little words.

Suffered from heart issues, yet still pushed himself beyond his limits to provide for his family.

Angeal loved both his parents dearly. But he was closest to his father, whom he adored. He loves his mother with all his heart. But he was always his daddy's boy.

Angeal's father instilled the idea of honor within Angeal. He viewed his father as a selfless, honorable human being. One he wanted to emulate as he grew older.

Genesis liked Angeal's father as well. He was a better father figure to him than his own dad.

Angeal's dad's untimely passing was the thing that pushed Angeal to follow Genesis into SOLDIER. He wanted to be his father's living legacy.

Part of the reason Angeal breaks the way he does in Modeoheim is learning that the man who loved and raised him, the man who died gifting him his most treasured possession, was not his real father.

[sentientsky]

you are singlehandedly making me interested and invested in the x files

mulder is so babygirl. scully is Everything.

i’ve never seen any of this show before what are you doing to me

hi laurel!!!! that’s the plan, my guy! slowly slowlyyyy recruiting ppl into the endless spiral that is the x-files >:)

have some propaganda aksjsksj (warning for potential spoilers)

we’ve got YEARNING. LONGING. DEVOTION THAT LITERALLY TEARS TIME AND REALITY APART. normal coworker things such as standing 0.2mm apart and eyefucking over a corpse

we’ve got ANGST. so much angst. agony. pain. ouGghhggg

also GILLIAN FUCKING ANDERSON (also david’s there too but i’m a lesbian. so like. yeah. idk he gives me gender envy skdjdk)

AND malewife/girlboss energy

homoeroticism, as well ofc <3

oh and there are aliens n stuff there too, ig. but did i mention special agent dr. dana scully? my wife?

[sirowsky-stories]

Collision

Part 4

Description: Niki finally wakes up, but while that's a relief, Pero still has more than enough to worry about.

Warnings: Pero Tovar x OFC, no reader insert, Pero's pov, conspiracy, cursing, angst, friends to lovers, hurt/comfort, secret identity, AU fic. Rating: Mature/Explicit 18+ONLY Word Count: 5700 Series Masterlist

-=¤=-=¤=-=¤=-=¤=-=¤=-=¤=-

   Time passes slowly in exile. The following day is tedious and frustrating, filled with strained conversations and constant small arguments between Pero and Gillian.    He’s grateful that she’s there, or he’d be locked to Niki’s side, terrified to leave her even for a moment, jumping at every sound, scanning the unfamiliar information from the medical equipment every five seconds. All of which would surely have driven him insane.

   But his gratitude is tainted with guilt. That she’s there. That he needs her there, where danger is always present and will be for the foreseeable future.    She has so many questions she wants to ask, answers she wants to demand based on what she’s overheard from his conversations on the phone. But she’s also scared to ask them, because she knows in her heart that the answers will frighten her. So, she simmers instead, which leads to discord.

   However, the tension eases considerably when Niki finally wakes up for real, on the second morning after her first little stir. And she’s much stronger this time.    By then it’s Friday and the nurse has started trying to avoid him whenever she can, which is why it’s Pero who’s at his friend’s side when her eyes suddenly just open. There’s no preamble, nothing to indicate that it’s about to happen. It just does.

   “Niki?” he asks while he jumps to his feet, and she turns her head to look at him.

   She’s wide awake. Her eyes are clear and sharp, already searching for answers. As if all this time asleep hasn’t just helped her heal but refilled her energy reserves as well.

   “Where are we?” she asks through a parched throat.

   “Here, take a sip of water first,” he offers, not knowing if perhaps he shouldn’t, but he decides that a little water can’t be that bad.

   He raises the head-section of the bed so that she won’t choke on it, and she gratefully takes first one, then another sip. Her throat is so dry that she struggles to swallow, but it does seem to ease some of her discomfort.

   “We’re at my safehouse,” he explains while he puts the glass down. “It’s in the middle of nowhere, the nearest populated area is a three-hour drive from here.”

   She thinks on that for a minute, and he can see her mind working. He knows that she’s trying to go through what she can recall, piece it together and make sense of everything. He can’t actually see her do that, but he knows that she is because that’s what anyone would do. And it’s certainly what someone as sharp as her would do.

   “They ran right into me… there wasn’t time to do anything…”

   “I know,” he soothes, seeing her get riled up by the images inside her eyes. “Niki… I know who’s after you and why.”

   Oddly enough, she doesn’t seem surprised to hear that. Which unsettles him.

   “It’s about Amazon, isn’t it?” she correctly deduces, and he nods, but then her brain connects the dots. “How can you know about that?”

   Strangely relieved that she’s questioning him and conceding that it’s a valid question which deserves a truthful answer, he still ducks out of it. He doesn’t want to tell her about his past. Not yet. She needs to focus her energy on healing. At least, that’s what he tells himself.

   “There’s a lot you don’t know about me. And if you really want to know, I’ll tell you everything… but not now. What you need to know right now is that you’re safe,” he replies, hoping that she’ll accept that for the time being, and disappointed in himself for not being able to tell her that she has nothing to worry about.

   He knows her well enough to know that she will demand those answers later, but for now, she seems preoccupied with something else. Something clawing at her mind and filling her with fear.

   “No…” she says, shaking her head slowly. “I’ll never be safe anymore.”

   “Hey, don’t say that. I’m not gonna let anyone hurt you.”

   He can see that she wants to believe him, but also that she doesn’t. She knows what she was a part of, how dangerous everything around that project was, how closely guarded it still is. She’s too smart not to know that her chances are grim.

   “I’m so sorry that I ran you out of my house,” he whispers, changing the subject, relieved to finally be able to tell her that.

   Her features soften then, the fear loosening its grip on her soul and allowing her to breathe a little easier.

   “I knew you wouldn’t take it well. I was arguing with myself in the car on my way to see you, trying to decide if I should even tell you, or just… buy a pill and get it over with.”

   He still doesn’t know how he feels about it, but he is certain that he wants the baby to be alive. For her sake, if nothing else. Whether she had wanted a child before all this, losing it under these circumstances would simply be too cruel.    He doesn’t say that, though.

   “You were right to tell me. You’re an honest person, that’s why I trust you,” he offers instead, and her expression warms.

   Still, there’s something unreadable underneath the surface of her features. Something that isn’t a question or a concern, and yet it seems to grip her and hold her hostage.

   “But you don’t love me.”

   She says it like it’s already an established truth. As though they’ve talked about it before and agreed on it. But they haven’t. And to his own surprise, he isn’t sure that he agrees at all.    It’s a snakelike sensation, slithering through him with powerful strokes, but also slipping from his hands as he tries to catch it and examine it further. And he feels like if he gets too close to it, it’ll wrap around his heart and squeeze it until it stops beating.

   “I stole you from the hospital and all but kidnapped a nurse before driving you six hours away from the world to my most precious and closely guarded secret.    If I don’t love you… then what was the point?”

   The question is aimed as much at himself as it is at her, and although he can’t answer it yet, what he knows with absolute certainty, is that Nikita Morse means more to him than anyone ever has.    She smiles just a little at him then, but she’s getting tired, and he wants to get Gillian in there while she’s still awake. So, he steps away from the bed and sticks his head out into the hall where she’ll hear him even if he doesn’t scream.

   She comes down from the library right away, and she looks happy for the first time since he’d assaulted the Mark Wahlberg wannabe back at the ICU.

   “Hi, Nikita. My name is Gillian, I’m your nurse,” she greets, to which Niki side-eyes Pero.

   “The one you kidnapped?” she asks, and he just shrugs.

   “It wasn’t quite like that,” the nurse counters. “I volunteered to help get you out of the hospital, but then things got… dangerous. And it became impossible for me to walk away.”

   “They came after me at the hospital?”

   “It looks that way, yeah. If your friend here hadn’t been there… we don’t know what might’ve happened.”

   Niki’s eyes turn back to Pero, who is suddenly unable to meet her gaze. He’s not entirely sure why. Maybe because he doesn’t want any gratitude from her, when she probably wouldn’t have been in this situation if he’d just allowed her to stay that night.    Or maybe because he��s scared that she won’t be grateful at all. Which really is a ridiculous thought, but it seems like fear is suddenly coating every feeling and thought he has.

   Why? There seems to be no reason or logic to it. He’s never had to fight his own mind like this before, at least not that he can recall, and it’s starting to freak him out.

   “But now, tell me how you’re feeling?” Gillian continues, bringing Niki’s attention back to her, at which point, he looks up again, eager to hear her answer in the hope that everything is healing as it should.

   “Um, very sore along my left side. That’s where the car hit me, so that’s where the biggest damage is, right?”

   “Yeah. But the side-airbags are what saved you. You were pushed into the center console rather than crushed by the driver-side door.”

   “Thank goodness for modern inventions…”

   “You were still lucky, though. Your lung, heart, spleen and stomach were damaged, so you were on the operating table for over five hours. The surgeon was able to repair everything, and it doesn’t seem like our less than ideal transfer of you has caused any post-op complications, which is nothing less than a miracle.    How’s your pain?”

   “Not terrible, unless I try to move.”

   “Okay, and what about your head? Any pain, aching or throbbing?”

   “Just a dull ache, mostly on the left side. Like right after you bump your head against something.”

   “I’d expect nothing less,” Gillian nods. “Well, as far as I can tell, you’re doing alright, but I’d like to get some food into you and see that you get to keep it, before I’m willing to say that definitively. How do you feel about mashed potatoes?”

   “Sounds heavenly,” Niki replies, and she really does look pleased at the prospect.

   “Great. We’re gonna have to take it slow and stick to easily digestible things at first, because of the damage to your stomach. So, I’ll go and prepare that for you while Pero gives you some more water.”

   “Okay. Thank you.”

   She nods and heads off to the kitchen, and Tovar takes a seat beside Niki again, once more lifting the glass and bringing it to her lips. But she doesn’t drink right away. She’s thinking hard about something, putting a wrinkle between her brows.

   “Why are you fighting for me? Whatever’s happened these past few days, you’re still the same guy I’ve known for five years. You don’t want our relationship to get complicated, you’ve made that very clear,” she wonders, and he remembers the look in her eyes before she’d left his house that night.

   He remembers seeing her trust in him break. And while he’s had time to re-evaluate things since then, she hasn’t. She’s still right there, back where they were two and a half days ago when she’d showed up with the unwanted news.    No matter what she might want to believe, in truth, she’s probably more likely thinking that the trauma of almost losing her has temporarily made him appreciate her more. A feeling which will probably fade with time, returning him to the uncaring colleague she’s always known.

   Pero wishes he could be certain that she’s wrong. But he just doesn’t know. Which is why his answer is stupidly simple and doesn’t explain anything at all.

   “That was before I knew that you’re being targeted by our own government, because of something that isn’t your fault.”

   “Oh, so you’re a humanitarian now?” she jabs sarcastically.

   “Hell, no. I just don’t wanna lose the only person in my life who might give a shit about me,” he counters, and then mentally chides himself when he hears the not so hidden plea for validation within those words.

   She studies his face closely for a few beats, before finally taking a few slow sips.    He wonders just how ridiculous he must look. The guy who’s always kept her at arm’s length, suddenly begging her to tell him that he matters to her. By rights she should smack him over the head.

   “I do give a shit about you. Quite a few shits, actually,” she admits instead of turning to violence, and he can’t help the smile that those words spark in his eyes.

   Somehow, despite how confused he is about his own feelings, it tickles him to know that he might be good enough that such an impressive person finds him worthy of her care and interest.

   “Thanks,” he says, once again avoiding her eyes and trying to hide the faint blush that creeps up his neck.

   It’s a complicated thing, realizing that he’s a lot more dependent upon another person than he’d ever meant or intended to be. So much of what he feels is coated in fear and yet he finds himself unable to ignore any of his emotions. Good or bad.    He has spent so many years getting a front-row seat to what people who claim to love each other, do to each other, that he’s long since decided never to put himself at risk of experiencing that kind of betrayal.

   Usually, it isn’t even significant things that ends up tearing people apart. Money and lies are most often enough. Or just one wrong word. And it continues to baffle him.    Maybe because he’d used to think that something like love would be stronger than such petty arguments. But having witnessed the opposite so many times, he’d eventually been forced to reconcile with a different truth. Which is that people are incapable of real love. That the best one can hope for, is mutually beneficial arrangements.

   For the first time in his entire life, that truth is now being tested. And he’s amazed at how good that feels. But it also makes his fears so much stronger, with the notion that he might stand to lose a great deal more than he ever has before. Not just his relationship with Niki, whatever that is, but this new-found hope as well.    And given that hope is supposed to be the strongest emotion that humans have, surely losing it must be more painful than anything.

   Niki closes her eyes to rest for a minute while she waits for the food, but as soon as she does, he immediately starts to worry that she’s not just resting. He has to remind himself that she’s a lot weaker than this half-hour of conversation makes him want to believe.    She seems so strong whenever she meets his gaze. So present and aware. It’s hard to see the frailty within her when she appears unbreakable from the outside.

   Still, he puts his right hand in front of her left and gently brushes his fingertips against hers, and when she shifts her digits to brush his in return, he’s reassured that everything is alright. But he takes the liberty of taking her entire hand in his, all the same, and he’s quite surprised at how much it comforts him.    Gillian returns with the food some fifteen minutes later, so he steps away to give her more room.

   And the moment he isn’t in her presence anymore, his focus immediately shifts onto how to go about protecting her. That’s become his sole function in her life now.    He’s thought about it almost nonstop since they got here, but he’s still looking for better options, hoping to think of something less suicidal than what he’s managed to come up with thus far.

   Getting rid of the Qwerty brothers would only be a temporary relief, since the government would quickly learn that they were out of play and send someone else. However, if he could convince one or both of them that it would be more lucrative to keep them alive, he might stand a chance at delaying having to deal with any in-house-cleaners for a bit.    The mind of an assassin isn’t that hard to read, but he’d still have to surveil them for a few days before he’d be able to assess what it would take to convince them, and that would mean leaving Niki and Gillian alone for as much as a week.

   He’s not concerned about whether they’d be okay on their own. The young nurse is resourceful, headstrong and cool under pressure, he’s confident that she could handle any problems that might arise, medical or otherwise.    What concerns him is that they’d have no protection if he left. If someone were to find them while he was gone, they’d be largely defenseless.

   Before he acts on the brothers, he needs to know more about the outside source that’s also on their tails. Who they are and where they’re from. Since that will help him determine what resources they have and how big of a threat they pose.    But despite half a dozen calls, Will hasn’t picked up or gotten back to him at all since that 01 am call the other night.

   There’s no reason to think that anything’s happened to him, not yet anyway. He’s done this before, although usually out of spite, which seems unlikely to be the reason this time, since this isn’t really about Pero.    Their history might be bad, but Garin is a good person at heart. Or at least good enough to wanna try and redeem himself by doing as much good as he can until he dies. He wouldn’t leave an innocent woman to her fate out of spite towards him.

   All of which leaves Tovar at a dead end. He needs more intel before he acts, but he’s not in a position to get it. So, he must wait.    But the frustration is getting the better of him. It’s easier to keep it in check when he’s with Niki because she needs him calm and in control, or she’ll try and shoulder the leader-role herself, injuries be damned. But when he’s alone… it eats away at him.

   The worst part is not knowing who’s coming or when. Every time that Gillian sits with Niki, he spends every second walking from room to room, looking through every window, scouting all the terrain he can see for incoming threats.    The house has a good vantage point even though it’s very effectively concealed among the trees. Even from above, one would need advanced camera equipment to spot it. Not even a thermal lens would be enough, other than in the contrast of the winter cold.

   He knows that he’s done everything possible to hide it away from the outside world, but since he doesn’t know who might be looking for them, he can’t help but fear that someone’s already caught their trail and are on their way.    More and more, he begins to feel like they’re not gonna make it without help. But who could he ask? He has no friends, his colleagues have already suffered enough, and Will is useless other than behind a screen.

   There are moments when he wants to just sit down in a corner and cry. It wouldn’t help anything, and that’s the only thing that stops him.    This morning, his aimless walking takes him out onto the veranda. It runs along the south side of the house, ending in a balcony which partially merges with the tallest trees at the front of the house, adding to its camouflage.

   He stops there and looks out between the tree-trunks.    The sun is still climbing, only just reaching through the canopy to warm his face. The cool morning air is misty and fresh, smelling of moss and bark. And while he stands there, his mind clears. Suddenly he isn’t worried or thinking about anything in particular.    It comes on so abruptly that it startles him.

   However, moments later, he hears the faint sound of an engine, and the stillness instantly turns into a frenzy. He runs to the back of the house to listen down the driveway. It’s the only road for miles in all directions, and the woods are too wild for anyone to drive anything through it. So, if it is an engine and not some trick of the mountains and the river, it can only be heading this way.

   Chances are, it’s just someone who’s really fucking lost, but he doubts it. Not many people would drive for three hours on a narrow dirt-road which according to all the maps, doesn’t exist and doesn’t lead to anything. Not even Google Earth knows that the house is there.    The sound is coming closer and it’s definitely an engine. Aside from Pero, only William knows the house exists, so he hopes that that’s who it is, but he prepares for the worst.

   There’s a locked weapon’s cache hidden in one of the walls by the front door, requiring a five-digit code to open. He unlocks it and pulls out a shotgun, two loaded pistols already in a shoulder holster, and a set of throwing knives that he straps to his right thigh.    Once he’s done, he can hear that the vehicle is still about a minute away, so he opens the front door and calls to Gillian.    She comes running through the hall within seconds, having recognized the urgency of his tone.

   “What is it?”

   “Someone’s coming. I don’t know who, so this might turn into a shootout,” he quickly explains.

   “Shit… What do I do?”

   “Stay with Niki and close and lock the bedroom door, and if you hear this door open, you press the biggest black button you can see behind my shirts in the closet. It activates a burglar alarm which will send a toxic gas through the entire house, except for that bedroom.”

   “Jesus! No, I’m not gonna do that!” she objects, so he steps closer to her and puts his free hand, not holding the shotgun, on her shoulder.

   “Listen to me. If these are our enemies, they’ll kill Niki and anyone protecting her, or they’ll kill us and take her to be tortured for information,” he says quickly, pauses to let that sink in, then adds. “Unless you hear me say otherwise, you will hit that button. Do you understand?”

   She doesn’t respond, but despite the panic that’s creeping into the frame of her being, she nods and then runs back to the bedroom.    He waits until he hears the lock turn, followed by the slight hiss of the hermetic seal being engaged to shield the room from anything toxic. Then he steps back out, locks the coded front door and prepares to greet the unannounced visitor.

   As he stands there, trying to prepare for what might be about to happen, Niki’s words from before ring through his ears, somehow louder even than his own footsteps on the gravel.

   “But you don’t love me.”

   It makes him freeze.    He’s always feared emotional pain above all else. Although now, what scares him the most is everything he hasn’t felt. Everything the heart is capable of, but none of which he has ever allowed his to go anywhere near.    Now though, he finds himself questioning if he does love her. His response had been so convoluted. So easy, since it hadn’t forced him to commit to anything.

   But what if he does love this woman, and everything that she has to offer?

   He wants to know the answer before he dies. He needs to know. But how does one know such a thing? What are the criteria? How is it quantified? He’s only ever seen the failures, and that’s not a good measure to start from.    So, instead, he tries to think about what he wants. And he quickly determines that he’s out there voluntarily facing this threat alone, prepared to die, because that’s how badly he needs her to live. The problem is figuring out why.    If it’s about her being his only friend, or something more than that.

   The engine is close now. A large car or pickup. It’ll come into view in just a few seconds.

   He thinks about her face, her skin, her body. All so beautiful to him, but nothing more than a surface to be admired by everyone who might want to.    He gets to touch it, though. Her surface is known to him, tip to toe, and he adores every inch of it. But more than that, he’s proud to have earned it.    Earned. Not taken or scammed his way to but given to him by choice and desire.

   That matters a great deal to him. To be trusted with something so private and personal and delicate, as someone else’s pleasure.    But he can’t distinguish what’s pride and what’s gratitude and what might be care. Of course, he already cares about her, he wouldn’t have done all this otherwise. He just doesn’t know where the line between care and love is.

   And then the car comes into view, and his thoughts are torn away from his own heart, refocusing entirely on the threat before him.    He doesn’t recognize the car, a large black SUV of an American brand, either GMC or Cadillac, so he steps forwards and raises the shotgun to chest height so that the driver will undoubtedly see it. Then he slowly angles the double barrels at the car, making his intentions clear.

   The car stops abruptly, and within moments, the driver’s door opens, and a pair of empty hands appear above it, quickly followed by a head poking up between the door and the frame of the vehicle.    Even seventy yards away he recognizes the short, dirty blond mess of home-cut hair, and lowers the weapon.

   “What the fuck’s the matter with you? You couldn’t have sent me a fucking text to let me know it was you?!” he shouts, to which William just ducks back into the car and drives up the final stretch of road.

   “No, actually. I couldn’t risk it,” he answers once he’s turned the engine off and stepped out.

   That worries Pero. All of this worries him, because Will doesn’t leave his house even to collect a newspaper or make sure that a passing storm hasn’t run off with his roof.

   “What happened?” he asks, as his visitor moves to the back of the SUV and opens the trunk.

   “Not sure, but I think someone’s noticed that I’m digging around the Amazon project. Maybe some of those computer experts that were hired to ensure the digital safety of the project are still employed. I don’t know.    But I do know that someone started a backtrace trying to find me, and even though chances are slim that they will, the breach was subtle enough to indicate that whoever’s looking for me is no soccer-mom. And I’m sure as shit not gonna risk my house and business for these assholes.”

   The trunk is filled from top to bottom with computer components and cables, so Will obviously intends on continuing his search from here, which is technically safer, but also adds another variable of danger for Niki.

   “So, instead you’re putting all of us at even greater risk,” Tovar coldly determines, and the man stops rifling through the trunk.

   “What do you want me to do, huh? I’m not some criminal mastermind, I can’t disappear into a fake identity or afford to build a fucking fortress in some remote and nearly inaccessible area.    Not to mention that I wouldn’t be in this steaming pile of shit if you hadn’t asked me for help, so don’t you fucking turn on me now!” Garin growls in return, and he’s not wrong.

   “I’m not turning on you. The damage is already done, that would be pointless. I just want you to remember this,” Pero starts, and then takes a step closer, making sure that Will can see the truth of what follows, in his eyes. “If they find us here, the helpless woman in a hospital bed is the only one that I’ll be focusing on saving.”

   He leaves the truck and heads back to the front door, to let Gillian know that everything’s alright. But he’s even more anxious now.    It might sound like a longshot that anyone would locate them out here, but it’s actually easier than one might think.

   The hospital has Pero’s name on file, and not only that, but they also have his name in Niki’s file, as someone she trusts and relies on, or he wouldn’t have been her emergency contact. So, any authority looking into her recent activities will know that he’s likely involved.    And after the deaths in the underground garage, not to mention that only Gillian knew what he was really doing, the staff have likely not seen much reason to try and help him. Moreso the opposite, especially if it was one of the nurses that had ended up dead.

   He’s separated his criminal identity from his real one as perfectly as can be done, so there’s no reason to think that anyone would figure that out, and since the safehouse can’t even be connected to Mr. Hood, no one’s gonna find it through paper trails.    But the truck that brought them here was borrowed from his employer and is likely considered stolen now. It doesn’t have a GPS tracking system because it usually only travels within the perimeter of the warehouse and the other smaller buildings that make up the OffSup company district, but it has the logo on the sides, which makes it recognizable.

   And from a satellite, finding and tracking the one truck that would’ve left the hospital garage at that time, wouldn’t be very hard.    Of course, that would rely on a satellite having passed overhead at that exact time, but even if none did, there are traffic cameras and other digital means of locating a vehicle. The roads here are free of all electronic surveillance, but a skilled mind could still make an educated guess as to which area might offer sufficient protection for someone trying to hide.

   On top of that, Will’s arrival means that there are now two trails leading to this seemingly empty woodland, which doubles the risk of someone making the connection that there might be something worth investigating out here.    This place was never meant to shield him from governments, only angry victims of his scams. Perhaps the odd drug lord or mob boss. So, all in all, Pero has reason to not be confident about the strength of his supposed safe haven.

   He unlocks and opens the front door again, immediately shouting an all clear to Gillian so that she won’t kill him, and then returns to the trunk to help Garin carry the computers inside.

   “I am grateful for your help,” he admits with a tired sigh once he’s back there.

   From the corner of his eye, he sees William stop piling bundles of cable into his arms as he listens with mild shock. Tovar has never once been nice to him. Not to the extent that most people would define “nice”.    But these are trying times, and his list of allies is painfully short. He can’t afford to alienate anyone right now, and least of all the one person who has a decent chance at helping him get Niki away from the claws of these mindless fortune seekers.

   “This is so messed up…” he adds after a few moments, bowing his head in premature defeat and scratching at the back of his neck.

   He doesn’t feel defeated. Not really. Just very much like one little wasp trying to walk through an entire ant colony unnoticed.    Those thoughts won’t help him, though. He shakes his head slightly and then gets back to work, picking up a large screen to carry inside.

   “Hey…” Will calls for his attention, so he stops and turns back. “You know I don’t want these dickheads getting their hands on her any more than you do, right?    I’m not here just to hide. I came to make sure that I can keep working and maybe find a way to get her out of this.”

   That surprises Pero. Because while the veteran isn’t cruel at heart, he does usually put himself first.    But he also never lies. At least, not to his old enemy.

   “Why would you give a rat’s ass about her?” he asks, but not confrontationally, just truly baffled at what the reason might be.

   Garin thinks on that for a second, seemingly trying to decide something.

   “Christine,” is all he offers, but it’s enough for Tovar to know what he means.

   His fiancée. She died seven years ago because of his ego. He’s never been able to admit it, at least not aloud, because the guilt never fades or eases. He never lets it.    However, he seems to have decided to use that guilt as a motivator for Niki’s cause. Why or how she’s managed to inspire this courage in him, when there have been dozens of people that could’ve done so before today, is anyone’s guess.

   Pero nods in understanding and then turns back to the house where Gillian has come out to see what’s going on, but then stops and holds the door for them as she sees the two men carry equipment inside.

   “William, this is Gillian. Gillian, meet William,” he introduces in passing.

   “Oh. So, you’re the one he growled at in the middle of the night a couple days ago,” she deduces, probably based on Pero’s body language around him.

   “Yeah,” Will confirms.

   “Do I wanna know what put you on his naughty-list?” she asks while trailing behind them towards the stairs.

   “You’ve got that the wrong way around,” Tovar answers her, much to her surprise. “I don’t have a naughty-list because there’d be no point in listing every human being on the planet.    What I have is a very short list of people I trust, and that currently includes both of you.”

   “Wait… This is how you treat people you don’t hate?” she skeptically inquires, and this time, it’s Will who answers.

   “Oh, I’ve seen what it looks like when Pero Tovar hates someone, and trust me, there’s no mistaking it. He can and will turn your entire world into dust and misery, all without even coming near you.”

   “Did he do that to you?” she gasps.

   “No. If he had, he wouldn’t have allowed me to even know about this place. Also, I would’ve been homeless and without a penny to my name, with no hope of ever getting one.    You have no idea how powerful a man you’re currently living with, Gillian.”

-=¤=-=¤=-=¤=-=¤=-=¤=-=¤=-

Part 5

Thank you for reading, and remember: I have no taglist anymore. Follow @sirowsky-stories and turn on notifications for updates on my writing :)

[delurkr]

Angela and her twin as teens

Angela on the left with her sister Gillian 😊 Gillian is my and @108garys 's oc and also the Angela-model reporter at the end of TDiM (non-canonically ofc). They are fraternal twins and once upon a time were the cutest besties✨

[snailvee]

elaborating in unecessary detail about my chip and price hc

tldr chip had a big gay crush on price and he reacted badly which led to chip having internalized homophobia and compensating by being overly adamant about his attraction to women (and for a little fnc flavor it made him fear his feelings for gill)

after the hole in the sea chip was alone, fending for himself with no one taking care of him. when he fell into price’s crew, it was the first semblance of companionship he’d experienced in a long time, and im sure a lot of the other ppl in this group were also just kids who’d ended up in the street with nowhere to go. but price gave him a hand to grab onto, offered him help and somewhere he could belong. i think that chips attachment to price grew at a rapid pace, he was the leader, someone chip looked up to, he idolized him, ofc he got a crush on him!!! it makes so much sense (to me). they were friends, they were close, and i wanna say that because of their closeness chip misread the relationship and thought price felt the same way. so in an awkward (and probably drunk) “we’re having a moment and im leaning in cuz i think you wanna kiss me too moment” chip is faced with the harsh reality that he was wrong. price has a negative reaction and this changes how chip views his own attraction, to men especially, for years to come. i think this is also when chip starts to realize he doesn’t wanna be part of this, the idolization of price is fading and when he asks him to kill that’s when it hits him that this is not right. he has to leave. and because he associates this attraction he had to price with these negative things this leads him into repressing his attraction to men in general and compensating by being so open adamant about his attraction to women. so when he ends up having feelings for gillian it scares him and he can’t even think of doing anything but denying it, pretending it doesn’t exist.

[slutforwings]

books i read in 2023 that i recommend :) mainly because i am trying to find new books to read in the 'book rec' tag and none of these people give summaries so I shall bravely do it instead for others!

wrong place wrong time - gillian mcallister (mystery)

Blurb: a woman sees her son killing someone in front of her, then wakes up the next morning only to realise it's the day before the murder. she keeps traveling back in time, unraveling the reason for the murder and trying to stop it along the way Review: i misread the back and thought it was gonna be a time loop but this was even better actually. i fucking devoured this book it was so compelling. i tend to devour mystery books like these regardless of their well-writtenness but this was genuinely really good and tied up everything neatly at the end.

autobiography of a corpse - sigizmund krzhizhanovsky (short stories)

Blurb: bunch of fantastical short stories like about the people living in your pupil, a society that deals in anger and malcontent, a guy trying to bite his elbow Review: this book made me realise i love short stories, but then it turned out i mainly love THIS GUY'S short stories. they were just that good. slavic writers are built different

the secret history - donna tartt (psychological fiction)

Blurb: cult group of pretentious college kids study greek and turn it into a personality trait. also theyre gonna conspire to kill one of their own and then try to hide it Review: all of these characters are cunts and i love them so much. do not believe the dark academia girlies peddling this book, these people are stupid and pretentious and morally corrupt and theyre SO MUCH FUN!! the internal monologues are fantastic, i want to study Dick's brain. its a very Long book and absolutely takes its time and yet it does not feel like any parts are really unnecessary. really good.

this is how you lose the time war - amal el-mohtar & max gladstone (sci-fi)

Blurb: two time travelers from opposing agencies each have a mission (the mission involves historic meddling through time travel but is honestly not as important) and keep encountering each other and leaving letters to taunt, falling in love throughout the story Review: listen i saw that tweet 'do not look up anything about this book and just read it' and i did and i had zero regrets. i bought the paperback after reading the ebook bc it was just that good. beautiful prose, fantastic worldbuilding that is sometimes only hinted at but everything made me go !!! can you tell i love time travel.

notes on an execution - danya kukafka (pyschological fiction)

Blurb: serial killer on death row recounts his life, as well as pov of the police officer that investigated the cases and got him in jail + pov's of the family of the victims Review: incredible story about family, morality and love. raises a lot of questions about criminals and 'evil' and does not answer them because that's the whole point. insane quotes too. also very vivid storytelling in the way that i could picture all the locations perfectly despite them not being described in detail. i think it was due to the intense Vibe

bunny - mona awad (uh. horror?)

Blurb: um. goth/'not like other girls' girl gets indoctrinated into joins a cult group of really girly girls that all call each other bunny and have kind of weird rituals meetings. Review: listen. i hate when people do this to me but. just read it. if you're a fan of magical realism and cult-y things, you're in for a treat. this book made me bike home in a daze. i love stream of consciousness where you as the reader are just as lost as the character! i love you bunny!

instructions for a heatwave - maggie o'farrel (fiction)

Blurb: a pensioned father leaves the house for his newspaper and then doesnt return. all the children are gathered by the mother to try and figure out what the fuck happened. Review: not so much a 'hey where'd he go' as it is a rumination on family and unconditional love. ofc theres some family secrets that get revealed but i found it more interesting to watch the family dynamic and the changes the secrets brought to it. bittersweet :)

[ravenkinnie]

have any jinx scars headcanons?

hmmm I imagine jinx is fairly riddled with scars, both because of yk. her always inflicting and taking violence but also because even something like chicken pox is likely to scar and I doubt zaun is big on bio-oil. plus, she's a kid whose main mean of transport is parkour they are always on some fuck ass old pipes and shit, I had scars as a kid from climbing construction sites shehjsj

the biggest ones I wpuld say or rather I like to hc shsjjs would be burn scars from the bridge explosion, likely some scarring from singeds greys anatomy meets doctor moreau moment, those visible shimmer veins, overall she's not a porcelain princess and I love that for me, I love imperfect bodies. burn scars in particular tend to be either this uneven raised pinkish skin (think fresh scars after knife cuts) or thick tight tissue that can be really uncomfortable which adds to discomfort that I imagine that level of shimmer produces already

cw self harm

gillian flynn wrote in an essay that when she was writing sharp objects she came to understand act of cutting as a lonely and comforting both due to the, ofc, self-violence but also the mending after - when you take care of an injury you did yourself it becomes an act of self-soothing. in this similar vein I think of jinx putting herself in line of danger as something similar - there's ofc her lack of regard for her safety and life and her suicidal tendencies but then there's the part where she mends herself or maybe she would seek out someone else for it (which we wouldnt see in canon because the one time we see her do it in canon she's not on good terms with anyone lmao). so there's the part of wanting the injuries amd then there's the part where nursing scars and wounds is where you comfort yourself or receive comfort

[krissy25]

Can’t Help Falling in Love With You

Pairing: Chris Evans x OFC Gillian

Summary: Gillian attends Chris’ sister’s wedding and it brings back memories.

Warnings: Fluff, slight angst, physical touch, kissing

Word Count: 631

AN: I was debating whether or not to post this but since my other one did so well I am. Hope you enjoy!

Don’t STEAL or translate my work!

Comment, like, and reblog! 😁

Wise men say

Only fools rush in

But I can’t help falling in love with you

The music had started and everyone was dancing. Well couples were anyway. She wasn’t with anyone and she hadn’t brought anybody. She didn’t even know why she said yes to coming to Shanna’s wedding. It brought on too many old memories from when they were kids. She had, had the biggest crush on Shanna’s older brother Chris.

Shanna had told her to go for it and tell him how she felt. When she did it blew up in her face.

“Hey Chris.” She said one afternoon in the kitchen eating lunch. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

“Sure.” He said turning and leaning back on the counter. “What’s up?”

She suddenly felt rocks in her stomach and pushed her food away. “Well…umm…this is so hard to tell people.”

She looked away.

“Gillian you can tell me anything you know that right?”

“Right.” She said standing and walking over to him. “Well you know how I like you?”

“Yeah.”

“Well I was wondering if we might take the next step and see where it goes.”

His eyes went wide and mouth dropped open. “Oh. Wow. Umm…that’s nice and all Gilly but I don’t feel the same way.”

Her heart fell and broke. “It’s okay. Totally okay. I should go.”

She moved away holding back her tears as she grabbed her things. “Tell Shanna I’ll call her later.”

“Gillian…” He was feeling bad.

“It’s okay Chris. I get it.” She said and walked out the front door.

Gillian sighed remembering the rejection.

Shall I stay

Would it be a sin?

If I can’t help falling in love with you

She walked over to the bar. “Two shots of patron please.”

“Not having a good time?” The voice asked from behind her.

She drew in a breath hearing his voice as the bartender set the shots in front of her.

“Not really.” She said taking the first shot.

“Gilly this isn’t like you.” Chris said concerned.

“Don’t you have something better to do than to bother me?” She asked downing the second shot.

She felt the alcohol all the way down.

“Still bitter I see.”

She scoffed. “It just bugs you that I don’t get turned on by your charm anymore doesn’t it?”

He laughed. He actually laughed. She huffed as she walked away from him. He called after her and found her in the hallway.

“You’re an asshole!” She said.

“So I’ve been told.”

“God!” She scoffed. “Never lost the ego I see.”

The next thing she knew he had her pinned against the wall with her arms above her. She felt her breath catch in her throat. She felt his finger tip run down her neck over her breast and down her side.

“My charm still works regardless of you resisting.” He said huskily.

“Chris…” she said breathless.

“After all these years you still want me don’t you?”

“Yes.” She whispered looking at him in the eye. “I love you Chris. I’ve never stopped.”

His lips crashed into her and he let her arms down. Her arms moved to his neck bringing him deeper into the kiss. Tongues fighting each other for dominance. They were making out like teenagers.

After they broke apart they both smiled.

“I shouldn’t have waited so long.” He whispered kissing her again. “We should get back in there.”

She only nodded as he grabbed her hand heading back inside. He pulled her to the dance floor.

“Take my hand, take my whole life too, for I can’t help falling in love with you.” He sang quietly to her.

She looked at him happily. “I love you too.”

He kissed her softly feeling happiness for the first time in awhile.

[librarycard]

would love your country music recs!! been trying to get into the genre but haven’t really listened to a whole bunch and would love some suggestions <33

YAY thnk u for reaching out. um most of these artists i havent trawled their entire discog but each has some things i really really love. many of them explore serious topics such as addiction, discrimination (racism, homophobia, sexism, classism, etc), and more (like a lot of less commercialized and more traditional country music does).

its important to note that there is a lot of crossover in country, soul, blues, americana, and folk, so some artists might be more leaning to one of the other genres but their relation to the country style compels me to include them.

i will also say that afaik these are mostly modern artists because nothing makes me fucking angrier than people saying that new country music isnt good. please pull yourself out of the country billboard top 100 for the love of god.

ok here it is: > yola (one of my faves, lots of crossover with soul in her style) > brandi carlile, maren morris, natalie hemby, and amanda shires are all good individually and are part of a collective called the highwomen (theyve collaborated with yola several times!) > robert finley (i could cry with how much i love his work, sharecropper's son 2021 is just fucking. perfect) > john fullbright > rhiannon giddens > gillian welch > shakey graves > charley crockett (his work all feels so fresh and unique to me, i never get sick of it) > courtney marie andrews > brown bird (one half of this duo has passed on so they havent made any new music since then, but i still suggest checking them out) > mary gauthier (drag queens in limousines is a total classic) > the war and treaty > sturgill simpson > allison russell > paul cauthen (he's collabed with orville peck, who im sure a lot of people here know! if not i rec him too ofc) > emily nenni > john r miller > lucette (shes had work produced by sturgill simpson iirc) > the secret sisters (very dear to me) > katie pruitt > shovels & rope (<3) > parker millsap > margo price ( i love her i love her i love her i love her what can i say. thats how rumors get started 2020 changed my life) > kaia kater > robert ellis (less familiar w him but i like what ive heard) > jaime wyatt > arlo mckinley (another artist i havent checked out extensively but ive heard good songs from him and like his voice) > the chicks (forever and ever <333333333) > amythyst kiah > mercy bell > justin townes earle (who has unfortunately passed away in recent years, i think 2020) > waylon payne > the devil makes three > evil > jason isbell and the 400 unit

i also dont want you to think i dont want people to listen to classics, i do. i love classic country music — if you havent checked them out, id especially recommend john denver, charley pride, dolly parton, willie nelson, hank williams, johnny cash, the carter family, glen campbell, kitty wells, robert johnson (hes blues, but hes mississipean blues and has influenced country music through and through), patsy cline, judy collins, waylon jennings, and marty robbins.

this isnt comprehensive but its what comes to mind right now. i hope it was helpful!!! <3

[diviineloser]

oh hii @vampvelour thanks for tagging me :)

————

LAST SONG I LISTENED TO: Venus as a Boy by Björk

FAVOURITE PLACE: um. Melbourne? i really haven’t travelled anywhere that i’ve liked more than my own city

FAVOURITE BOOK: I mean it’s probably still The Secret History by Donna Tartt.

CURRENTLY READING: The Collector by John Fowles. i’m also reading Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn for bookclub which i need to finish.. before this weekend… better get on that lol

FAVOURITE TV SHOW: Pushing Daisies i will always love you <3

FAVOURITE FOOD: burger. i also love char kwey teow.

————

tagging: @deadboysextoy @ohbutwheresyourheart @1800suicide @stitchedgrave @n0isy-gh0st no pressure ofc <3