#oh yeah i now ramble about my ocs on youtube lol

[nikatyler]

now that i'm actually putting together a lot of character lore, i should probably work on a tumblr character page huh

[funpuddle]

Happy ramble from me: I'm a crash bandicoot fan of many years! Around when I was 5 years old my dad would play the original games with me before I went to bed. He would also play his guitar for me and I would jump around on the bed and dance. As I grew up we kept playing it sometimes. My dad also taught me to appreciate how brilliant the music is in the game and the charm of the visuals. I used to pretend to be crash and run around and jump and climb things in my backyard haha. And I've loved it so deeply ever since now that I'm an adult. It makes me think about the warm and cozy parts of life. The original games are really precious to me and I even think they contributed to some of my personality. I love adventure and I love exploring the world!! I love temples... I love forests... I feel like a relative to crash bandicoot lol. I'm goofy and toony too...we'd get on well. I love islands and the beach...and even in the 3rd game crash rides a motorcycle and I love motorcycles...I'm a BIG daredevil adventure type guy and that's definitely what crash himself is all about. I would be delighted to hear more of your own crash bandicoot rambles anytime. I also never thought about N.Gins design in the way you've explained until now. I never noticed that it reflects a a big missile impact of trauma and different sides to himself and I can now see it very clearly. I also have had trauma in my life as I got older and I'm trying to heal from a different side of myself that is deeply deeply hurt. So yeah I'm connecting to what you said very strongly. Lots of love <3 I hope you enjoyed hearing my joy for the games

I can't understate how beautiful that is, you may as well be truly related to crash bandicoot. I enjoy your warmer and nostalgic perspective on it! My dad also introduced me to crash as a little kid and played with me, specifically crash bash, and I'd look at the other games on YouTube and treat him as my OC !! I used to want to make a cartoon called Crash and Yoshi... I'm pleased to hear the atmosphere of those games also left an impression on you, besides the charm of it being based on old toons, the limitations of the PlayStation + the unique Vertex animation + lushness around the hallway type of level design + music all culminates in a surreal little world that shows you just enough of itself that your brain can latch on and go so crazy imagining the rest. I didn't grow up with the original three games but I did grow up with crash bash, and I'd have dreams where I'd go out of bounds and discover more levels. And Bash isn't even considered one of the bests!! The way you describe your love of exploring coming from crash bandicoot makes me want to reframe the way I interact with the world oh man. We could all use a little more Crash Bandicoot bravery in our hearts. Thank you for sharing, I smiled big and hope you are too

[causticsunshine]

Heyy whatcha been getting into lately? Alternatively, what have you been enjoying being a hater of lately?

okay first hello i love how this question is phrased hajdks very on brand for me and two uhhh oh boy a lot of stuff tbh!

so to preface. over the years i’ve had many phases where i get out of some irl person based media (usually 1d or some random tv show) and back into animated series, then the inverse happens, the cycle repeats, etc.? so i’m currently back into animated stuff as well as fully leaning into kpop everywhere instead of what i was doing before, where i was trying to limit my posting in general or limiting it to twitter under the guise of trying to seem slightly Normal™️ but now i’m fully leaning into whatever makes me happy and inspired and if that makes me annoying so be it

anyway—in terms of animated shows i’ve been watching one piece for almost a year now as for some reason i couldn’t get into it when i was younger and then was deterred by the series length, but i’m really enjoying it! i’m about to start the long ring long island arc if that means anything to anyone lol. i’ve also been watching and loooving dungeon meshi, and i’m currently reading it as well! i tried reading it a few years ago and stopped a few chapters in (idr why) but now i’m hooked and am struggling to pace myself…. i might try and do some fanart soon 👀

with kpop mmmm i’ve actually been a casual fan since like 2010 (listened to some 2008-2009 but it was mostly early shinee and random kpop compilations on youtube lmao) but have gotten in and out of it several times? now though i’ve been pretty Involved consistently since 2019/2020, although the groups i follow the closest are ateez, oneus and nct (127)!

i saw oneus in seattle last month after missing them twice and had such a good time (i still haven’t finished sorting my pictures though and haven’t posted like. any oops) and i am tryyyying (like. praying on my hands and knees lighting candles talking to the moon levels level trying) to get my hands on VIP1 tickets for ateez in tacoma and tickets go live next week so wish me luck as i will definitely need it with how pricey it’s likely to be… but also i will proudly commit heinous deplorable acts for ateez barricade sooo either way i’m determined to get my way? aka: i want and need my own y/n moment ahfksksn

also to clarify i’m not a shipper or whatever when it comes to kpop! i may enjoy the odd fic or will cringe read things with my friends but it’s nothing like HL for me; it’s a very different dynamic overall and i don’t get those kinda vibes in a serious way from any groups i follow? although with ateez… i can kinda see why they attract some of those kinds of fans i’m ngl

and on the side, i’ve actually been working on original content again! the one group of ocs i tend to pick up and put down has been temporarily sidelined for a pair i dumped a few years back but am currently reworking and actually have a story for now! idk if i’ll do anything proper with said story as comics are exhausting so rn i’m mostly word-vomming into docs and trying to nail down my character designs. when i’ve got things worth sharing though i do plan to share here as well, if anyone would be interested 👉👈

alternately when it comes to my haterism… i still greatly dislike and am exhausted with miss swiftie for numerous reasons and my god my art twitter is swathed in h*zbin h*tel content?? like actually plagued?? otherwise though there are just things i wish i saw less because i’m simply just not interested right now (aka 1d stuff) or in general and don’t want to start disliking those things because i’m seeing them too much

ok def rambled more than i meant to oopsie doopsie but yeah uhh that’s kinda it! anon i hope you are well and enjoying yourself in whatever you are doing rn 💕 and feel free to share if you feel so inclined to!

[canisvesperus]

Y’ALL I forgot to say okay oh my god I cannot fucking find this video and I am going to start disintegrating…. If you can help me I will kiss you /p /hj OR JUST AT LEAST let me know that you know what I’m talking about PLEASE.

The year I watched this was either 2013 or 2014, and POSSIBLY late 2012 but I’m leaning on 2013. I don’t know when the video was published, but definitely not any earlier than 2011 and absolutely not any later than 2014. The dates are good for filtering out search results, but I still haven’t had any luck. I can’t remember it it was a comic or an animatic, but basically, it was THIS scene from The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy (the audio is the same), with Eridan as Nergal Jr. and Feferi as the girl.

https://href.li/?https://youtu.be/eX1FRVJsKtI

This audio. Everything after the cut is just additional rambling mostly unimportant to finding the video.

Okay, so as said in my nostalgia post part 1, exact date unknown, I got introduced to Homestuck via a wolf roleplay chatroom website by a Gamzee roleplayer sometime in 2012 (it was very popular to model your animal OC directly after an existing character from non-animal media). Following this, I did a little “research”, which turned into a lot and SO IT BEGINS. At first, I mainly only looked at fanart, fanfiction, and I’d make attempts at reading the actual webcomic, but it was a struggle because 1.) strict parent and family computer being out in the open, 2.) Homestuck was not yet made accessible on mobile. The dubs on YouTube didn’t get me very far, and I actually ended up reading most of Homestuck at a friend’s house LOL.

What DID work on my crappy model 3G iPhone, however, was YOUTUBE!!!! I watched ALL the comic dubs and ALL the animations. Simply obsessed. I remember some of Octopimp’s videos being only a year old or less at the time. One of the first I watched, before I REALLY got sucked into the fandom, was the one described above. I coincidently really really liked GAOBAM and Junior was my favorite character. Considering he and Eridan are kind of adjacent in several aspects, so naturally it took me no time at all to point and go “yes, That One. I like that one. That one is mine.” <3

There were some significant pockets of western animation fandom around this time, so I also coming from there. Nice little deviantart communites, some uh, much more controversial and often not so nice. This was around the time when Bleedman was a household name. Yeah… Wild times indeed. If you weren’t around for it, I can’t even begin to describe what fandom was like when the internet was a far more lawless “Wild West” domain. Some aspects I miss, some I certainly don’t. 🗿

I’m totally getting off topic now, but I guess this post is about to count as nostalgia post 1.5 before the second one. WHICH I’LL MAKE SOON, I just need to find some pictures. 👍

[serenedash]

I started rambling about my experience with kh and then it turned into khux and then it just turned into me rambling about Ryou and my art journey????? enjoy I guess,

it’s very long but there’s art in there :)

It’s funny to think about my kh journey as a whole tbh, I grew up watching my mom play video games, which included kh1 and 2. I wasn’t allowed to play the playstation2 we owned BUT I did have a gameboy so the first game I played was CoM (after my mom finished it ofc,) so I guess you could say I’ve always been passionate about kh “””side games””” lmao but I did fall off of kh very quickly bc again, I wasn’t allowed to play our PS2 and also I Am A Terrible Gamer I’ve Never Finished CoM I’m sorry you all had to find out like this, but then 358/2 came out when I was in middle school and!!! I didn’t care and I didn’t play idk why lol

Anyway, fast forward to high school I’m like 15 and my older sister, who HAS been keeping up with kh, has a wallpaper on her phone of roxas and ventus. And bc I haven’t kept up I say “nice roxas wallpaper” and she says “thanks but it’s roxas and ventus” and I proceeded to get so mad that I was determined to prove to her that her wallpaper was just roxas twice and then I fell down the BBS rabbit hole and suddenly I was reading about vanitas and then I’m reading the fan translations of the BBS novel and I’m crying??? I am sobbing???? and that’s how I actually got into kh for real lol we are vanitas stans before we are people,

It’s so funny how I thought I was some kh super fan, knowing all this stuff that I spent so long reading and rewatching cutscene movies, but I never once, SOMEHOW NEVER ever came across khx. It’s so absurd and bizarre I seriously have no idea how I never once encountered khx prior to khux. I suppose that has to do with the fact I wasn’t involved in the fandom? In early high school I had stepped away from fandoms as a whole and I didn’t have any interest in really posting content or interacting with fans anymore bc of how burnt out I was from a previous fandom,

but khux released! and I was so hype and excited for it! on launch day I was a senior in high school, I had ran around to every “nerd” and weeb I could find in school to ask them to join my party and fun fact about me is I have crippling social anxiety I literally refuse to start conversations irl so holy shit I was OUT HERE doing the MOST

My player just originally had my name (Matt) but everyone in my party had fun names so Ryou was born! High school was one big yugioh phase for me and ryou bakura is one of my favorite characters ever so it was just the logical name choice lol I quickly started creating Ryou, the character, as well. I was also leaving my homestuck phase and that + vanitas obsession made This character design (art circa 2016)

If y’all are familiar with my kh oc’s you might notice that keyblade now belongs to my kid Monty LOL

Anyway that got scrapped quickly for the chip and dale outfit (which is where Ryou’s trademark goggles are from <3) Goggles have been a staple of my character designs for a LONG TIME so like, it had to be done, (that’s a separate ramble about a separate oc tho)

OG Ryou was an interesting guy; he was a young party leader with this overwhelming responsibility on his shoulders bc of his status as a party leader. In his original story, he also struggled heavily with darkness, much like Terra but for Ryou it was more that the darkness was controlling him and not like a source of power like it was for Terra

A big part of early Ryou I kept, however, was the crushing awareness of loss. One of my party members (the strongest one at the time,) had left without saying a word and I was very confused and hurt. This was around the time the ephemera plot was happening so I decided to incorporate it into Ryou’s story; having him experience losing a friend to darkness since it’s so normal for wielders in Daybreak Town to just disappear, and this would unintentionally become a theme for both me and Ryou as khux friends would just randomly disappear.

I was desperate for khux at this point and I decided to watch the fan translations for khx and GOD, god, was I obsessed. I couldn’t stop thinking about the foretellers. And I’m not going off about that here bc I already did that, but I actually started entering fandom again! I did it slowly, I started on tumblr before this blog was made altho it was me sending anons to the few khux related blogs I could have lol a friend convinced me to get twitter where I got involved with the ffxv fandom, which led me to the kh fandom and eventually the khux fandom there which is what REALLY got me going on khux.

I joined discord servers, most of the servers I’m in are khux related, and from there I joined the khux oc rp (shout out to anyone there who might be reading this lol here’s some art from the beginning of the rp,)

It’s SO FUNNY how the RP influenced me so heavily. I hadn’t RP’d in YEARS, I used to have a strict no oc rp policy, but here I was? And the funny part is, I had barely developed Ryou. I had scrapped his original story and all I had was POST WAR Ryou so I literally had to reverse write him; I had only ever written him as a depressed, guilt ridden adult, but it was a fucking blast and I have such fond memories of this rp when it was active,

But anyway, this encouraged me to get more serious about art! I started drawing, writing, cosplaying, and roleplaying when I hadn’t done any of that stuff in a very long time. The first time I ever drew a background was for a deviant art khux competition actually LOL

also! I always think extremely fondly of the drawing I did of Aced in the keyblade war. It was also one of the first backgrounds I ever drew and it felt like my real starting point in the khux fandom. It got a ton of notes on here and someone wrote a tiny fic in a reblog which just made me SO HAPPY like it really felt like people were noticing me :) I was going to draw a matching Ira but!! I just never did!! One day tho, it’s on my art bucket list to redraw this along with Ira,

Aside from my personal growth, khux was great for my social life ngl, I made SO MANY friends online and got to meet a ton of people irl over the years! It’s crazy to think about all the people I now know and talk to? It honestly makes me really emotional. I’ll never forget taking the train into NYC and meeting up with discord friends. Going to conventions and talking with people about the latest khux update? Absolutely insane and those were some GOOD TIMES, if I thanked every khux friend or even just person who made an impact on me then we’d be here for a LONG TIME,

Fun fact, for my Lauriam cosplay all I needed to buy was the wig I just owned his outfit LOL also? Probably retiring that cosplay ngl people treated me like absolute garbage when I wore him and it led to a lot of confidence issues for awhile ngl. That’s probably one of the only memorable negative experiences I have with khux; it was great when khux people recognized me but for kh fans that weren’t in khux? They were FUCKING MEAN??? fuck kh fandom at large, I only care about khux fandom,

This leads me to another huge part of my experience in khux fandom: THEORIES!! I used to write SO MANY and oh my god my brain was so full all the time. It was a huge appeal for me in the fandom; I had been previously writing theory posts in the RWBY fandom and it just migrated over to khux for me lol I had done a ton of theorizing around Lauriam tbh, it was really the only reason I liked his character at all bc initially I did not care about the dandelions, anyone who wasn’t Skuld I was like “please leave Now thanks”

A funny part of khux fandom I never intended to be apart of is the MEMES, I really only started doing memes as stress relief bc college had me so busy all I had time/energy for was these quick little shit post drawings.

The first meme I made, file name “invi despair” LOL we need to get her a girlfriend smh anyway, I think in my senior year of college I did a bunch of rapid fire memes all in one month bc the stress of finals was getting so bad afdgfhdgf as far as I know my impact on this fandom will be my memes bc all I do now is enter a kh/khux server and introduce myself and I go “yeah I draw art. here’s a meme” and everyone goes OH YOU, honestly I am nothing if not a clown

I’ve talked so much idk where I’m going with this. Khux is just a good game even if the gameplay actually kind of really sucks yknow lol but it was the first game I played where I like, REALLY got into the meta and the mechanics. I used to read so much on the mechanics and watch youtube videos on which medals were worth pulling for. I was never a whale or a top player exactly, but I could rank well if I tried lol I’ve made it to the top 100 for solo rankings, my party has made it to top 10, and in pvp I’ve made top 300. I’m not the highest level in my party but FUCK do I know how to manipulate this game LOL

And with all that hard work, the strategies, the theorizing, the content I’ve made-- it’s been my life for 5 years. I’ve logged into khux almost every single day. At the end, I have logged 1820 days in khux out of 1910 days. Kinda crazy. Crazier I’ve never spent money on khux either lol the only “money” gone into it was one time my mom gave me a google play store gift card and I used it on my birthday for a VIP xemnas medal which eventually made it to regular pulls anyway but it was nice and a little treat :)

I’m not a gacha fan, I don’t care for it, so I don’t think I’ll be touching another gacha again. But for kh? This was pretty fucking awesome, even if it sucked a lot sometimes LOL It was worth it for the people I’ve met most of all I think. I would honestly be a completely different person without khux and that’s REALLY insane to think about.

[botwstoriesandsuch]

Whats your method for transcribing music from BotW? And, while I'm at it, whats your method for composing?

oh?? Oh??? OH??? Questions about music? Questions about composing for Kip?? You know not what waters you have just unleashed. 

Ok so for the first question, I just transcribe based on the internet, and just by listening to the soundtrack by ear. I kinda just stitch together the melody based on sheet music on musescore, and covers on youtube, and I just kinda see how those versions are composed and then based on that I craft how I want the music to sound on my own version. 

I have this decade old Yamaha DGX640 keyboard that only has five song slots so the most I can(know how to) do is record one two-handed harmony and use my phone to record me playing the melody on top of that. But it’s kinda tedious and the botw songs are usually easy enough to play with just two hands anyhow so I really only use that method when I wanna be fancy. I have a habit of just using left to play arpeggios and by then the music usually sounds full enough. (cough cough that Rito Village one cough cough) So yeah it’s basically a method of studying the basic material online and then making up and crafting whatever stuff sounds nice around it

As for the original comps, well they’re all usually based on some botw concept (as I’m guessing most of the ones you’ve all seen are just the oc themes lol) so I do one of two methods. The first method is I take the key signature of a botw melody that is related to the thing I’m composing for, then I fuck around on a keyboard until I have a melody I think sounds cool. USUALLY I make it on a typical build to coda/climax thing, but the example I’m using is an exception (cause it was my first draft and all I did was repeat the first half with additional harmony)

Ok so I take the key signature, I craft my original part of the music, and then based on the “story” I want to tell, I fuse in a bit of the botw bits within “lows” of the song. So in Zimiri’s Theme for example, I had this certain segment of Kass’ Theme that I liked, so I started based on that key signature. Then I just completely forget about botw while I compose the parts for my character. So Zimiri is a Sheikah poet for the royal family, and also a bard, so I made his theme in 3 to give it that waltz feel. The Eflat key has that...idk the technical term, but it just has that vibe of kindness and serenity and wisdom which is what I’m going for in his character. Now, Zimiri also has a crush on Zelda, but he knows that’s unrequited and he’s mostly ok with that, but that doesn’t stop him from at least dreaming of some unreality where he could dance with her under the stars (uh fic spoilers I guesss). Hence, his main melody, (0:10) the half note Eflat to D to Bflat, is of the same beat pattern of Zelda’s lullaby. And then, uh character arc spoilers! The story I’ve constructed for Zimiri is basically this idea that he comes to understand this battle between what he wants and what he knows he needs to do. He has a harmless crush on Zelda, but he knows he needs to respect her and do what he can as her friend during these rough times. [I mention Zelda a lot but I swear that’s only like 7% of his character] He recognizes that Adello and Revali and a bit of Link, they all want to [REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED] but he tries to push them to be more [REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED], even if that isn’t always successful. He’s mostly a static character, that recognizes what other people want, but wants to help them be better through what they need, which is an ironic trait since it’s a bit contradictory to his whimsical and almost naive cinnamon bun personality as a bard. But that’s like his main thing, you see like, he wants nothing more than to be the hero of the story and to wield a sword and save everyone, and while its OK to dream that, he still is content and fills his role as support, as the “harmony,” the background to the melody if you will. So THAT is why, the song is crafted where it’s grounded into his main melody, those three notes, the halfnote Eflat, to D to Bflat, and while the song ascends and seems to dance in the stars and the harmony (wink wink parallels) rises and becomes more prominent over the course of the song, it ultimately always Always comes back down to those three main notes. It’s like a dream that will eventually fade back into reality. The whole song is an ascension to those higher, magical notes in the “stars,” that comes back down to the essentials of Zimiri, those three main notes, that as said before, are similar to Zelda’s Lullaby, but is purposefully, a full descension in the scale, it doesn’t rise. 

Ok and then Finally, finally finally finally, we come back to that botw aspect. Like all of that, is just the original stuff and the thought that goes into where the notes go and how the stuff moves and plays out, it’s basically like planning a fic outline or something. But anyhow, this idea that I’ve been crafting for Zimiri’s theme, this concept that he understands that even though he might not be the one to save the world or see the fantastical end to the story, this whole ascension and descending thing, with the higher parts being a the stars that aren’t yet in your reach or the dreams that are not yet reality and all that sap? Right so now that’s when we can put a bit of Kass’ Theme into those higher parts. 0:33 and 1:07 are just bits of Kass’ Theme slowed down, specifically, the parts in Kass’ Final Song the time and sacrifice aspects of the legend. “Now resurrected after 10,000 years//Her appointed knight//Gives his life//Shields her figure and pays the price.” You could probably hear the “10,000 year” part most prominently. So one, the botw aspect serves to the themes that I’m going for in this character, and two, it serves as that connection between Zimiri and his eventually successor, a successor who would live out to see a dream that he couldn’t wooAAAoooh parallels. And even still, the segment that I’ve drawn out of Kass’ Theme still descends (seamlessly I might add, if to toot the horn a bit) into Zimiri’s core 3 note theme. So while I’ve written the piece to pick up at those whimsical parts, and to foreshadow and encompass the journey I have planned for this character, I’ve ultimately grounded the music itself to a specific scene that I have written, (and not yet posted I need to finish some other things) where Zimiri playing music to himself under the stars, the melody on his lute serving only to keep the sky company. 

OH RIGHT and I said I had a second method for composing stuff didn’t I ahaha...this post it already way too long and full of uneditted rambling so maybe I’ll gush about that some other time :p

[enduringsea]

( rules: you can usually tell a lot about a person by the kind of music they listen to! put your music on shuffle and list the first 10 songs, then tag 10 people! no skipping! ) / tagged by @yellowcrumpet​ ╭( ･ㅂ･)و )))

Thanks for the tag! I LOVE these things-- I don’t rlly have a playlist either though, just a mess of music files on a device I haven’t updated so I’ll be checking my YouTube history too lol. There’s a uhhh.... pattern to be found, mainly relating to Code Vein or other OCs.... which isn’t surprising ._. ;; I made it a separate post bc I knew this was going to get long and rambly with lyric snippets and crying about fictional characters, sorry :D

1. Repeat Until Death - Novo Amor don’t go / you’re half of me now / but i’m hardly stood proud / i said it, almost oh i’ve been low / but damn it i bet it don’t show / it was heaven a moment ago oh i can’t seem to let myself leave you / but i can’t breathe anymore This one gives me Loubeth vibes ok, partially bad end route ;-; While Elizabeth is a very strong person, her friends are the most prominent reason she tries to do anything at all & isn’t living day-to-day in a monotonous grind to survive without a solid purpose other than ‘help random ppl bc it’s the right thing to do’. If she loses them, it’d ruin her & hammers into her head how everything she’s ever done has been a failure. She suffered a major betrayal by her boss before the Collapse, she was unable to fully participate in proj. queen despite her incredible test results, she failed to defeat Cruz and take her blood during Operation Queenslayer, and if she fails to protect the people she’s finally found meaning with? She’d break down completely & destroy herself to save them. She’s always had some level of abandonment issues, and without her family around it’s so much worse, even if it isn’t the most obvious because she’s generally seen as very well put together-- I really can’t express how much it would hurt her to lose Louis, Yakumo, and the others. She’s just not one to show just how bad it can truly get for her mentally and emotionally-- she’s resilient as hell, she’s been through hell repeatedly and survived it all, so it’s easy for others to assume she’s fine all things considered. It makes her feel weak and ashamed of herself if she shows any level of vulnerability, so she doesn’t; she swallows it down and is afraid of disappointing those who look up to her as a fighter and friend-- of course, no one at Home Base would blame her for being vulnerable, they all have their moments, Bethy just sets herself to such a high standard it’s difficult for her to talk about her own suffering in spite of how well-versed she is in getting her thoughts and feelings across otherwise. Louis is the one most keen to how deeply she’s hurting, but he doesn’t understand just how deeply until she finally does fall apart. The final swell of the song and its desperate lyrics really relays the pain they both feel-- Louis too would not fare well if something happened to Elizabeth, because he blames himself she was even involved in Operation Queenslayer for a long time, I honestly did so bad in explaining coherently, this song just has so much emotion and hurt behind it adklfjdfdff </3

2. Looking Out For You - Joy Again this is a love song for a girl who will never know it’s about her she's beaming that smile / all the while i’m all tripped up on my own throat i guess there is no hope This song reminds me of Elizabeth & my friend’s character Takashi Fujioka, who gets-- vERY...FRIENDZONED, for lack of a better word, by Elizabeth in his story, it’s really summed up best as tragic (;﹏;) Before the Collapse they were hitting it off, then the Collapse happened, they were separated, he lost his sisters, Mido happened, he was experimented on + became a revenant, etc, etc; years have passed since then & she’s gotten her life together as much as one can in a world like Vein, but for Takashi it’s like no time has passed at all. Elizabeth is subtly older in appearance, she’s been working w Lou & Co. for a long time; Loubeth blatantly have a connection, & rather than bringing up his feelings + making it awkward bc he values their friendships, he just kinda. chokes on them & does his best to help out the team. It doesn’t help he can’t even be jealous bc Louis is a really solid friend to him too, IT’S JUST A MESS OF A SITUATION & the death of what could have been if things were different.

3. Closer - Teagan And Sara ( no lengthy explanation for this one thank goodness, I’ve just been watching BoJack Horseman again and I really like some of the songs they add in, I like listening to this one on loop when mindlessly coloring something )

4. Brutal - Olivia Rodrigo  all I did was try my best / this the kind of thanks I get? they say these are the golden years / but I wish I could disappear ego crush is so severe / god, it's brutal out here I have it on a playlist for Elizabeth somewhere, not all of it applies to her but it reflects some of her struggles she has both before & after the collapse. She’s-- always kind of been a mess while under immense pressure + has serious self image issues, this song hits that side of her well. She’s been held to humanly impossible standards by both herself and her family bc frankly? She can reach them, she’s NOT exactly human. She was born into her position as a hunter & intends to keep it for as long as she lives (like revenants, her kind is very much ‘either gets killed or lives 5ever), even if some days she really feels how heavy the burden can be. She didn’t have a normal childhood and she’s fine with it for the most part, but it alienates her from most of her peers-- she never got to date anyone, never had a close group of friends, never went to parties that weren’t formals, etc., while she feels a little childish about it, she does envy ‘normal’ and understands the pressure she’s lived under her entire life has caused damage-- she has been exploited for her abilities, there’s just not much she can do about it but to keep going, rlly.

5. Freaks - Surf Curse  don't kill me / just help me run away from everyone  i need a place to stay / where i can cover up my face don't cry / i am just a freak / i am just a freak UhhhHHH this song really makes me think of Oliver Collins :D;; thank TikTok for showing it to me. It makes me think of how scared he was, of both the world and the revenants who captured him. The song’s use of the word ‘parasites’ really makes me think of Revenants and the BOR parasites XD I’m hoping when I poke my video editor again, I can record some Oliver footage to make a short video to this song. Oliver deserves so much better, I wish you could save him, but that’s what AUs are for, hahah.... The second half of the lyrics make me think of the AU I have where he lives and has to grapple with the guilt of surviving and the things he did to other revenants to get by too.

6. All Eyes On Me - Bo Burnham you say the ocean’s rising / like i give a shit you say the whole world’s ending / honey it already did you’re not gonna slow it / heaven knows you tried got it? good / now get inside I haven’t seen the Netflix special yet but I’ve had this song on repeat since my move started. The lyrics hit too hard & resonate with my existential dread, covid exhaustion, and extreme burnout in my 20s, but bc I have Damage I can also relate it to CV ._. ‘you’re not gonna slow it, heaven knows you tried. got it? good now get inside’ makes me think of--;; the bad end route again, and Elizabeth’s desperation to keep her found family together. It’s not like her to completely stop caring about an issue, but in the moment she realizes what’s being taken from her? She doesn’t want to save all of revenant-kind if it means she’s going to wind up alone all over again, her world is effectively over if she’s forced to be alone again. The MC frenzying means the only immediately identifiable hope she had of saving everyone else is gone, so why not just go home? If they’re all doomed, she wants to at least be together for a little while longer, it’s fine if they use her blood to survive & everyone else in the mist is out of luck, it’s soul-crushing bc I’ve never had her in a situation where she’s been this reckless, despondent/hopeless, and thinking irrationally where it’d impact more than herself-- especially when she’s normally goal-oriented, organized, meticulous, so on so forth: she’s not one to act without thinking something through first, but that last breath of light just got sucker-punched out of her. All she wants is home, comfort, and family, and ultimately in the bad end route she does manage to preserve their lives, maintain the mist, and supply blood beads, but her own condition leaves her on the throne-- it’s a mix of the bad, neutral, and true ending rlly ldkfjdf BUT YEAH enough rambling on that :D;; This song’s really good and touches a lot of different thoughts and ideas both in real life and my ocs, kind of embarrassing--;; thank u bo burnham for ruining me with this beautiful song

7. Yellow - Coldplay look at the stars / look how they shine for you / and everything you do your skin / oh yeah, your skin and bones / turn in to something beautiful do you know / for you I'd bleed myself dry Does this song make me think about JackEva? Yes. Yes it does. Star / night sky symbolism? Bam. Sappy lyrics about love and finding the person you’re with absolutely mesmerizing and worth dying for? BAM. If JackEva were capable of using their own blood to save each other, I can see it-- hJNGn they just care about each other so much, Jack cries for her even though they both knew that eventually one of them would succumb to their duty, and if the roles were reversed I can see Eva doing the same, I adore them beyond human language. On my CV RP blog, my Jack’s not shippable bc-- Eva, my friend even have them looking after his nephew (an oc--) at one point. I should seriously drop some headcanons down eventually....

8. Louder Than Thunder - The Devil Wears Prada  are we meant to be empty-handed? / i know i could, i could be better i don't think i deserve it / selflessness, find your way into my heart all stars could be brighter / all hearts could be warmer 

LMFAO throwback to my middle school playlist, I’m old-- I’ve applied this song to a lot of things back in the day, but I really connect it to Loubeth now, especially Louis. Lou & Bethy are both functional idiots who are too hard on themselves & have trouble recognizing their worth beyond what they can do for others. They’re trying to be better-- to make up for what they perceived wrongs they’ve done, but it’s hard, they don’t believe they’re worthy of the love and support the other gives, but they still yearn for that sense of security. After Louis’ memories are returned, he finally understands the guilt he’s felt since he became a revenant and it really skews his self-perception; he blames himself for so many things & Elizabeth, who has always been able to kill when necessary, sets it straight-- “It’s not your fault”, and it takes Louis some time to properly absorb that message. He thinks she’s just trying to comfort him, which she is tbh, but she’s not wrong: “It’s not your fault you couldn’t kill someone. It was never your job to kill anyone.” It’s up to people like her to do those sort of things-- Elizabeth may not have been present when Cruz frenzied, but if she had been? It would have been over before it started, that’s something she has regrets over, even if nothing could have been done since she was already on the field. Actually, she’s actually really quite angry that security failed to monitor Cruz properly and has a few select words for the ones there who could have actually done something before it got out of hand-- civilians and doctors are exempt from her shtlist bc they’re not meant to be killers (so don’t worry Artorias, she’s not ready to bite your head off!), but they had to have some kinda security detail rite o-q??? They’re probably hiding from her wrath-- BUT ANYWAY, she insists she’ll never blame Louis for not being able to do something as serious as killing another person. He was a normal human being who cared about his friend, not a failure, and he couldn’t have been expected to do something that shouldn’t have fallen on his shoulders in the first place. As many times as it takes, she’ll reaffirm that it wasn’t his fault, she’s not angry, he’s always done his best and her opinion of him hasn’t changed. He’s a good person and she loves him through all the hurt, though she doesn’t drop the word ‘love’ for a long time. It just-- takes Louis a while to accept she views him as someone worthy of the love and respect she has for him. It’s kind of ironic she’s so adamant on Louis not blaming himself considering she’s the one privately blaming herself for-- wow there’s too much to unpack, she feels guilty she was even born?? im so broken over these two. I love them and yet they SUFFER... 

9. What I’ve Done - Linkin Park i'll face myself / to cross out what i’ve become erase myself / and let go of what i’ve done today this ends / i'm forgiving what i’ve done

I have Louis Amamiya brainrot and I’m so glad I’m not the only one who thinks that this song fits him super well & it needs to become an AMV dsjfkldsfd. I’m a near life-long Linkin Park fan and this fits with Lou so well thematically. As much as I’ve gone on about Louis’ guilt, he does steel himself to keep going forward in spite of it and make things right, for everyone. Maybe it wasn’t really his fault, but at the end of the day his inability to kill Cruz in that moment left a disaster in its wake that got a countless number of people killed-- the MC included with Karen and Aurora. He doesn’t want to run away from the truth, doesn’t want to make excuses, he wants to take responsibility for it and he’ll work himself to death if it means things will be better-- it’s both admirable he’s got a strong resolve and VERY concerning with how willing he is to die for the cause, please don’t overdo it, Lou, you’ll break mine and Bethy’s hearts ._.;; It won’t always be easy, there are moments the grief gnaws at him, but in the end he does overcome it (and uh. as in the bad ending, we know he can actually do it this time). I know we can’t see everything, but I would have loved deeper character interactions, especially with Louis with an emphasis on grieving + forgiving himself properly-- but this song really is nice with the whole ‘I’m going to face my mistakes head on, forgive myself, and keep moving forward’. It’s what Louis deserves: self forgiveness and a damn break ‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚

10. Call of Silence - Hiroyuki Sawano you will know you're reborn tonight / must be rough but i’ll stay by your side even if my body's bleached to the bones / i don't want go through that ever again so cry no more / oh my beloved ngl idk if those are the correct lyrics, buuuuuuut....... im a weenie and am internally weeping abt loubeth after midnight, what else is new lmfao- i’ll at least try to be brief :D I also used to really like Attack on Titan when I was in high school, I dropped the anime years ago because I was waiting for s2 and never got back to it once it started airing again, I thought I’d finish it once the anime was complete since I eventually caught up with the manga, such a good series BUT ANYWAY-- I think it’s a really pretty song and Loubeth fit with the tender lyrics. IT’S LATE, idk what to say about them other than what I’ve said already dsklfjdslf im sorry I really ramble a LOT and I’ve been so busy lately I haven’t had the chance to >w>;;

[chimcharstar]

ALL THE COLOURS

HERE WE GO BOYS

zinc white; how are you really feeling today? no one-word answers please!

I’m feeling tired because I’m supposed to be in bed. But happy because I did the work and I can get away with sleeping in and things are just chill right now. I have devised a way of sneaking waste food at work. If you put it in these little metal containers and hide them under the fridge, nobody notices them and throws them away. This eve I dined on garlic bread and prawns.

cadmium yellow; when you think of the word “happy” what’s the first thing that comes to mind?

Walking with coffee and tunes. I’m trying to appreciate things in my life I will feel nostalgic about later in the moment, so I don’t regret anything. This is one of those things. Although I might not have the tunes part for long because I fucking broke my headphones and they may or may not start playing my music out loud for all the world to hear. I hope people like disco!

lemon; what’s your comfort food?

Food from my old workplace. I have trouble finishing food usually but not this stuff. I will probably scream while eating it. You know this and you love me

hansa yellow; what’s your guilty pleasure song?

“I Will Survive”. People were singing it in the Office and I guess it’s so famous and ironic and cringey now or something. But then I remember that one fucker

yellow ochre; name an artist/band whom you just discovered & can’t get enough of!

Herbie Hancock. I don’t know if I’ll listen to every single thing from him but I was just listening to some funk as you do and his like solos? I was vibing. We were having brain to brain communication. It was an experience. It was so so good. It was good fucking music. Listen to this shit. Herbie Hancock - I Thought It Was You This stuff makes me want to wiggle on public transit. 

naples yellow; where do you feel most at home?

Bonsais and my quiet neat fucking room. Or not giving a fuck in other people’s mess.

raw sienna; with whom do you feel most at home?

YOU HO

golden ochre; describe the relationship you have with your closest friend.

We reblog asks and send each other all the asks. ADHD disaster energy finding balance. The worst posts I’ve ever seen followed by revenge. Two gay best friends who are best friends. No seriously I am so grateful for your unconditional love and your warmth

golden deep; what’s your favorite season?

Autumn. When the leaves were falling and the sun was shining all bittersweetly I was running around taking so many pictures because there’s like this golden time and then it’s gone.

cadmium orange; what do you like to do on your days off?

I like to buy too many plants and pretty rocks that are just vibing. I just like to wander around with coffee without a schedule. Listening to funk and disco. Seriously I’m the coolest person ever

orange lake; do you have anyone you can turn to when you’re sad?

U HO. And some online mutuals of course :) I feel like I don’t turn to people when it’s real sad hours though. I just give my ocs more PTSD.

titans; do you prefer slow mornings or relaxing evenings?

Relaxed evenings. Fuck mornings. All my mornings are slow buddy. 

shakhnazaryan red; are you currently binge-watching anything?

No, because I had to go and cancel my Netflix as all my favourite things got more episodes. 

red ochre; are you more right-brained (creative) or left-brained (analytical)?

Oh right brained bitch.

burnt sienna; is there a painting that brings you peace when you look at it?

No, paintings are stressful. It’s always like “Holy shit, that must have been so much work! I don’t enjoy painting myself! This person is better at painting than me!” I have much love in the heart for Van Gogh.

english red; what animal do you relate to most?

I know what you’re trying to do and it’s not going to work. I could say a cat, because I want to lie down in a patch of sun, knock things over, and complain loudly. I would say a dog because I think people are way better than they really are, am tenaciously loyal to them, and get excited about going for a walk.

vermilion; what’s your favorite accent?

Whatever this one hot guy at work has.

cadmium red; do you have a “type” when it comes to a significant other?

FOR FUCKS SAKE okay I’m going to google what my type is

You got: Mr./ Mrs Perfect

You like someone that truly has is all. You need someone who is well rounded in all aspects of life. When it comes to looks and personality, only perfection receives your affection.

Wow, what does that mean at all

scarlet; describe your current crush/es.

Ok, one of them gave me cheesecake, one of them offered me pizza, another one is the guy whose Facebook you stalked for me and we still couldn’t find his birthday but I laugh about one adorable photo still (the car one), and one of them I spent half an hour trying to find where I put the birth chart of and we’re actually really compatible. I’m sorry, if you want more information I’ll have to ramble about it in your messages.

ruby; what does your ideal first date look like?

OH I JUST WANT TO WALK DOWN A STREET HOLDING HANDS AND GO TO A RESTAURANT WEVE NEVER BEEN TO BEFORE AND TRY SOME FOOD AND LAUGH A LOT, AND THEN MAYBE GO ENJOY THE VIEW OF THE OCEAN AT NIGHT. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK? IS IT?

carmine; what does your ideal second date look like?

I don’t know, fuck it let’s go to the aquarium!

madder lake red; would you ever kiss someone (or accept a kiss) on a first date?

I dunno man. I feel like I wouldn’t if it wasn’t socially acceptable but I’m also wild and crazy.

rose; what’s something really positive going on in your life right now?

I REALLY ACTUALLY LIKE MY WORKPLACE. And my living situation is pretty okay. It’s not great I guess but I’ve been coming a long way.

quinacridone rose; what’s something you’re really looking forward to?

Literally what are these colours. Okay, I’m looking forward to putting wires around crystals to make them into jewellery. Then, I want to give the jewellery to my friends. 

violet rose; what does your dream house look like?

An old as fuck, old fashioned as fuck haunted-looking mansion I can give some love.

violet; is there any place in particular you’d like to settle down?

I need the outdoors bro. I need those trees. I gotta live in the countryside again someday.

blue lake; what would you like to do/accomplish before you settle down?

Write some books! Run rampant in the city…

cobalt blue spectral; what is the most beautiful place you have ever been to?

I think it would have to be the hills where I grew up. It was bursting with biodiversity, there was a rustic sheep farm, everyone shut the fuck up, there would be frogs, the smell of the fresh air in any season, some days would just be heart-stoppingly beautiful and I ache for it sometimes. Birdsong? I heard some birdsong today and I wanted to cry. I remember our hedges would be deafening with the birds in it.

ultramarine; when was the last time you were in a good mood? do you know/remember what sparked it?

Today, it finding something I maybe could sit around and read and then finding it in me to actually get out of bed lol.

blue; what’s the most recent dream you remember?

The one I just had. A lot of it is blurry, which is frustrating because I got some strong almost-memories of it throughout the day, but it sticks out to me because I was bawling my eyes out a lot in the dream, and I also hurt myself the way I used to and I had to check that I hadn’t done it in my sleep. But I think it was a very expressive dream and those are my natural emotions.

bright blue; what does your dream family look like? any kids or pets? 

I like the idea of a husband and some dogs, cats and chickens. Kids maybe.

how many of each?

A lot of chickens, but not too many please.

blue cobalt; do you like your name? would you give yourself a different name if you could?

I do like my name, and I did give myself a different name. Even if I knew how annoying everyone would be about pop culture Gordons, and I did. I still would choose this name.

prussian azure; what’s your favorite scent?

I’m running out of things to say as my favourite scent. OK, Nomad from Old Spice. I don’t know why, I think it must suit me or something. Maybe it’s the citrus… stuff going on there.

azure blue; what’s your favorite type of tea, if any?

Red Rose, my mom made it for me as a kid and she drank it all the time while teaching me piano or reading books.

turquoise blue; if you could start a garden, what would you plant?

Flowers, to show off to everyone, and then I don’t know, maybe some fucking pumpkins and easy things like corn and peas.

cerulean blue; if you were guaranteed to have a viewership, would you start a youtube vlog?

I think I’d be happier to have one if I knew no one was watching my antics LMAO

glauconite; describe your body without using any negative adjectives.

Best of both worlds

yellow green; picture yourself walking in a field. what do you see & hear in this scenario?

I’m still thinking of where I grew up. I see the sun through the branches of very old maple trees, and hear the wind in the long grass.

green light; are you in a comfortable place in life? if not, what do you think might make it better?

Yes, but I could make it better by moving in with cleaner roommates and getting a cat. And maybe work at something I’m actually interested in, or go to school or something.

green; name three countries you want to visit; do you have any actual plans in place to visit any of them?

I don’t have plans, but I’d like to visit Mexico, France, or Japan.

emerald green; do you speak any languages besides english? are there any additional languages you want to learn?

Kinda French. I want to learn Spanish… now Portuguese because everyone at work speaks it… literally, any very popular language. I want to learn so many languages

oxide of chromium; what’s your favorite book?

BRO WHAT IS A BOOK

olive green; are you currently reading anything? how do you like it so far?

Yeah, I’m reading a personal account of a Satanic cult. I had to stop reading it because I wasn’t ready for the graphic details.

mars brown; what’s a movie that always puts a smile on your face/makes you laugh?

Megamind/Thor Ragnarok

burnt umber; what’s something you plan to do before the day is over to take care of yourself?

Wow I feel really called out right now. I was going to eat some chicken because I’m hungry. Because that’s what I should be doing at 3AM.

umber; have you drank enough water today?

Yes, but probably not. I’ve been trying really hard today though.

voronezhskaya black; what or who is your go-to outlet for when you need to vent?

Probably you again, welcome to the salt mines!

sepia; name five things that always make you happy.

Buying a plant, rolling around on my fuzzy blanket, videos of cats being idiots, little unexpected thoughtful gifts, people sharing food.

indigo; what’s the best/sweetest compliment you have ever received?

A Treasured Mutual once spontaneously said I was a really good person because I was chill and they felt free to be themselves, to be vague.

payne’s gray; describe your aesthetic?

Looking around my room, it would seem to be whatever those studying people organizing notes with the window open on a sunny day have. I don’t know if this is me, but my room looks… vaguely feminine and organized in that way.

black; post a selfie because you are so beautiful!

I’m in my PYJAMA CLOTHES. I only want to take a selfie with GOOD NATURAL LIGHTING and the DAYTIME DARK CIRCLES around my eyes not the NIGHTTIME DARK CIRCLES. Maybe I have one hanging around

[exadorlion]

why i havent really uploaded.

i sound the a youtuber rn but for reals, i feel like i owe it to you guys to share my reasons. i’m really gone rn and this is the only time i’m vulnerable so

art on tumblr was my dream. when i was a kid i saw all the fan sets drawing these incredible things and i wanted to be just like them. everyday i practiced so fucking much i didn’t sleep for days and i’m not kidding about that. i used to have this fucking OC story called Rewind and it was just filled with lesbians. so seeing their art versus mine didn’t stop me, i tried for uh um until 2017. that’s when my popularity began to rise. i loved all the attention being in dramatic and unnecessary and i loved how my own fan group club idk my cult i loved my cult LOL but i felt loved. but idk how to love you guys. lmao this is way off topic i’m sorry i ramble and just talk i’m gonna still do it because i’m stone but i just acted like ur my peeps n shit. this is so off topic what the heck but yeah u were my dudes and shit and when i drew i felt like i drew for friends but like i knew eventually y’all gonna leave

that’s why i haven’t uploaded for a while

i saw myself lose about 3k followers and i’m not guilt tripping or nothin like y’all good, cut ur ties and go but i kinda went into this depression of what is worth art.

oh yeah to elaborate. i’ve been hella wanted to be the cool chill fandom artist and idk if i achieved it because i feel like the cat meme with the knife but anyways, i saw everything disappear.

then i meet my ex

yeah that was a mess

and

now i’m super depressed because i have no art to show people, i lost a lot friends, i’m high almost everyday because i want to kill myself, and i’m lonely fuck and everyone on tumblr is shit. i mean i meet wonderful ass people so grantful but y’all need to be humbled down fr it’s stupido my friendo. anyways that’s why i fuck w people who talk like me (have the same what is called when they kinda write the same — speech???? anyways,) and i’m sorry if i seem condescending sometimes because i hate myself

b y e.

[oniarcade]

for the identity meme! 1, 3, 4, 6, 10, 11, 17, 19? ❤

1. if someone wanted to really understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to?

Aaaa, man… there is so much I could answer with; but I’ll try to keep it to things most relevant in my life right now… One Piece has had a huge effect on my life as of a couple years ago; my brother got me SUPER into it (my first experience with it was the 4Kids dub; which I watched as a kid and I… didn’t know what to think.) But the Funimation dub is incredible; and One Piece has saved me from my depression countless times… I just think about a few key scenes, characters, quotes… and I just feel really empowered. The other anime that makes me feel that way is probably Ojamajo Doremi, a magical girl series that started in the late 90′s and went into the early 2000s. Doremi is a really positive and beautiful show; again I watched it originally from the 4Kids dub Magical Doremi which, like One Piece’s treatment from 4Kids was… not good. But to this day One Piece and Ojamajo Doremi are two shows that inspire me SO MUCH and I love them to pieces. One more anime, while not a ‘good’ as Doremi or OP would be the Hakuouki anime based off the visual novel. Its one of my favorite romance/action animes and I adore the game its based off of. xD Oh, and Samurai Champloo too– its an amazing anime with fantastic music and characters that have stuck by me through all the years. I really love anime and games based off of history, like Dynasty Warriors and Samurai Warriors.

As for music… Some of my favorite bands/artists are Do As Infinity, Bonnie Pink, Day After Tomorrow, Misono, TM Revolution, Aika Yoshioka (they’re J-Pop and J-Rock), as for non-Japanese music… I really love Caravan Palace, Hollywood Undead, Imagine Dragons, Shinedown… I like a big variety of music, so its hard to point too many out without rambling lol… I always have to have my MP3 player with me (i’m old-fashioned!) because music is extremely important to me. 

3. list your fandoms and one character from each that you identify with.

One Piece - PeronaFire Emblem - Setsuna from Fates (lol she’s one of my faves and I’m dim-witted like her…)Tales of - Rita MordioSteins;Gate - Mayuri Hakuouki - SenhimeAmnesia Memories - Maybe Sawa, I love the best friend characters… Disgaea - Fuka and Seraphina tbh because I can be extremely difficult and stubborn ahaha ;; 

I’m bad at listing fandoms orz Those are some of the ones most important to me right now, at least… |D

4. do you like your name?  is there another name you think would fit you better?

I do like my name– Aleshia. I like my nickname, Kappa, a little better though. xD Kappa is a cute word and I love the creatures. 

6. are you religious/spiritual?

Not extremely, but I do believe in God and the higher power. I do pray when I’m in despair and respect people who have faith… Just not the ones who are religious fanatics. ;;; 

10. do you have a creed?

I thought about this one for a long time; and I can’t really put one into words…. So I don’t think so.. I’m just not good at wording my thoughts.  ;;;;

11. describe your ideal day.

I wake up on a morning where I don’t have to work and spend the day in my house, drawing, playing video games, or watching videos on youtube. At some point I eat one of my favorite foods while getting some good progress in art-wise… and joking with my brother about character/OC stuff and planning out more stories together. I am a woman who is easily pleased… TuT 

17. would you say your tumblr is a fair representation of the “real you”?

Kinda, sorta, yeah… I try to fill my personal blog with things that make me happy and things I love. I just don’t talk on there much unless I’m speaking up about something I feel strongly about. And my art blog here, I post all my creations and OCs I consider my children… I just need to get better at actually talking about my characters and ideas, without sounding weird. x’D 

19. which Harry Potter house would you be in? or are you a muggle?

Idk much about Harry Potter (I only read a few of the books, I think I stopped after Goblet of Fire) but I always liked the word Hufflepuff because it reminded me of Kirby when I was little… so Hufflepuff!!! xD

Thank you for the asks, dear!!! (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ

[tumblunni]

Digimon frontier ocs?

Randomly started rewatching CactusCasual's great Digimon Frontier critique series. He's leaving youtube soon and making the weird decision to delete his whole account and everything he's ever done. But he's uploaded a bunch of his best stuff to google drive so if people wanna keep.it they can. Still i think its a lil dumb to not just leave the account open even if you're not using it? I dont know anything about why he's quitting the site though so maybe he has his reasons.

ANYWAY this got me thinking again about how Frontier is so goddamn boring and weirdly cliche and badly paced, and like everyone just focuses on "but they changed how digivolution works" and ignores all the actual reasons its bad. Like, kids have fused with digimon in previous seasons too! And haven't we all wished we could be the awesome characters like angemon and etc? A digimonny power rangers henshin thing isnt an inherantly bad idea, it was just executed badly. I dislike it cos it meant we completely lost any sort of digimon and human bonding experience plotline. They gave us two recurring digimon characters but they were just basically a pokedex and the world's least funny comic relief. Gimme a version of the show where the kids actually talk to their "spirit evolutions"! Like maybe they have a digimon partner but its forever stuck in baby form or spirit egg form and cant fight without fusing with a human host? Or just give us a better non-combat digimon pal like bokomon and neemon but like.. Fully developed with their own character arc and relationships with everyone else. Maybe ophanimon could have been around the whole time and been a mentor and parental figure? And we could actually explore her moral ambiguity, cos seriously the show makes her kind of a "ends justify the means" asshole and just NEVER AKNOWLEDGES IT. Wtf was up with that scene where she illusions Cherubimon with a fake dream of him being purified and getting to just go back home and be friends? And then she just backstabs him and we never mention it again. Like seriously even if she couldnt actually cure him that scene at least revealed that he WANTED to be cured and it made him so much more sympathetic! If he can be reasoned with, maybe they could have talked him down and then gone on an adventure together to find an actual cure for him? Also seriously what is up with his entire plot! Cos he just gets 'infected with darkness' cos he 'had darkness in his soul' but its just cos he thought the humanoid digimon were being racist against the beast digimon? And like.. The council was 2/3rds humanoid with him as the only beast representative and since he got infected by evilness they never remotely tried to recruit a new one or listen to what beast digimon have to say. So he was kinda right, yo! Also wtf with the reveal that actually no everything we just said is pointless because his REAL motivation was just blindly obeying ANOTHER humanoid digimon that comes out of nowhere to be the final boss. Also what is up with all the increased sexism in this series!! Its so weirdly worse than even adventure which had the excuse of being "a product of the times" yet still had way better variety of female characters and less bigoted stuff! And frontier came right after tamers which was one of the best series for gender equality and even used the medium of the setting as an opportunity to talk about the subject. Shame they censored that in the dub tho, Renamon talking about how digimon have no biological sex and how she only came to think of herself as a girl when she came to the human world. And rika's family accepting her and inviting her to family girls's night and stuff! Like as a metaphor for transgender issues it really worked to try and explain it to a younger audience in a natural way. And then one season later in frontier we have ONLY ONE GIRL IN THE CAST and wah wah whining about fashion and oh no she cant ever win a fight and her goddamn spirit form is in skimpy lingerie despite her being 12, and the show is always perving on her! And then she loses her powers halfway through the first season without winning a single fight, and has to be the damsel in distress to motivate the dudes in a stupid love triangle. And even when she does get to fight she's only allowed to fight the ONE SINGLE GIRL ON THE VILLAIN TEAM and they have stupid slap fights and "who's the most pretty" and BEACH EPISODE and GAHHHHH

...anyway as you can see i have a lot of reasons why i didnt really like the series. But what i meant to make this post about (BEFORE I GOT DISTRACTED) is that the fundemental concept itself isnt bad, they just wasted all its potential. And its a really good concept for ocs! Make your own digi superhero person and explore the fragmented world doing stuff offscreen during the series! Like they left so much open?? We know that other kids also got on other trains to the digiworld and they all just failed or gave up or got captured by the bad guys. And we know there's a bunch of spirits that the heroes never use because the villains got them again, so its cool to imagine an alt universe where the roles were swapped. What if different kids became the chosen heroes? What if different spirits were corrupted by the villains? What would a good guy Grumblemon be like? What would the kid be like who got that spirit? Would their evolution form be wildly different from grumblemon? Do the villain forms and purified forms look as different as Duskmon and Lowemon did?

SO MUCH POTENTIAL!!!

So yeah i wasted so much space here blabbering, so i'll probably make a separate post about my oc ideas lol. But i'd love to see other people's ideas for ocs/reinterpretations/other ways to fix that wasted potential!

So! Digimon frontier oc ideas!

To start off,have an undeveloped idea of someone on the team having Angemon as their spirit evolution. Cos it would have made the transition to such a new series a lot easier if they had some sort of "hey this is for you" to the fans of the previous ones. And angemon is the Adventure digimon that already looks the most like a regular human in a weird mask.

SPEAKING OF WHICH! less regular humans in weird masks! Whats the point of "you turn into a digimon" if you dont turn into a digimon? Like i know the whole gimmick is "humanoid mode and beast mode" but even the beast modes often look like humans in a costume! And there's been so many humanoid digimon before who actually looked like HUMANOID MONSTERS rather than just normal dudes cosplaying! There's literally nothing "monster" about agunimon, he's just a guy in some knight armour. Like the most you can do is charitably assume maybe the horns are his own and not just attatched to the helmet. And its annoying cos the villains have way cooler evolutions! And also double annoying that they always bend the humanoid/beast rule in such transparently self serving ways. Tommy gets two beast forms cos he's meant to be the cute mascot-looking character. Zoey gets two human forms cos she's meant to be grossly sexualized all the time. When kouichi turns from bad to good he loses his interesting looking actually monsterous evolutions and just becomes another dude in an armour. A friggin palette swap of his brother!

Anyway anyway LOL IM RAMBLING AGAIN yo...

Ideas for ocs!

I was thinking of a main girl character who's basically just a "fuk u" to all the stereotypes they did with Zoey. Actually gets a monster lookin beast form and a warrior lookin human form and actually gets to goddamn fight! Maybe her name is Hilda or Hildegarde? And i'm imagining her as a chubby nerdy kid with glasses and curly hair and a super cute oversized sweater kind of fashion sense. And her main spirit form would be this super badass lady knight giant orc thing who can Protec All The Peoples! Maybe earth element or the irony of being light element but she's this big ol monster goblin with just a tiny pair of angel wings on the back, lol! And then her personality is normally super shy and socially anxious, but she actually finds the digimon world kind of freeing? She's a total badass in battle and acts like a big ol powerful protector of all her friends! And she's always super excited aboyt adventuring and gets carried away comparing stuff to her favourite books. And now we must learn everything about this new place!! TO THE DIGI LIBRARY!!! So she's able to be confident and bubbly when it comes to actual adventure stuff, but she's still shy about regular life and anything social. Maybe its her weakness? Like she's scared about going home because she thinks she'll be "just a nobody" again, and lose all the great friends she made here. And also maybe a backstory of her heroic side still existing even before she got magic powers, but in the most tragic way? She managed to fend off a burglar once all on her own, she just snapped and did everything possible to defend her family, even though this was a man three times her size! But instead of being seen as a hero it just made all the neighbours and kids at school spread rumours about her being dangerous. Oh she must be in *a gang* if she knew how to fight like that! Oh its so *dangerous* for a kid that age to have such anger inside! Maybe she's a *scary mentally ill person*! So the whole situation ruined her social status even more and made her retreat even more inside her shell. And this is why the circumstances of the digital world are such a wish fullfillment for her and she's so scared of just waking up and it all being a dream. I think the villains could manipulate her fears, and it could maybe lead to her Skullgreymon Moment?

And then another idea i had was for a trans boy? I just thought this would be a good framework to explore LGBT stuff. He'd maybe be the wind element? And his personality would be very "classic shonen hero" but without the "dumbass" part, instead he's the cynical planner type dude while Hilda is the "i didnt even think, i just wanted to save everyone" type. But he's still super peppy and tries to be the class clown all the time so people will like him, and loves to climb trees and stuff. I think maybe his fighting style would be all about trickery and random chance? If there was such a thing as an element of surprise then he'd have that one! And then his story is that he doesn't have anyone supporting him for who he truly is at home, and he's afraid that his new friends will call him a freak too if they find out. He took the opportunity and cut his hair short as soon as this adventure started, and just introduced himself to everyone as a boy. But he's scared that people will find out he "lied" even though he didnt, he's just been so beaten down with the idea that he's not allowed to be himself and he has to pretend to be everyone else's idea of an ideal cis man or else they'll reject him. So maybe he starts off a bit obsessed with cliche masculinity and has low confidence about himself? And this could reflect in his digivolutions actually changing! He starts off with a really over the top buff warrior dude form, even though his fighting style is entirely about speed and trickery. So he tends to get into trouble with this fake form getting in the way of his ability to fight. And then when everyone accepts him he gets all powered up and changes into a new form! A way less "cliche macho" dude who looks like a stage magician instead and actually synchronizes with his element to become super powerful! And he's all like "oh no i became less manly" but everyone is like "wtf dont let yourself believe you're any less of a man because of dumb stereotypes!" And Also Big Friendship Hugs.

And then maybe this provides a resolution to both him and Hilda's plots? Like when the story is over they still stay friends in the real world, and having a friend who supports them gives them enough power to withstand all the haters and stay confident in themselves. But itd be kind of a coincidence for all the digidestined to live in the same city lol! So maybe in real life they live at least a few towns away, and they become long distance pals who send letters/emails. Because I LOVE ALL MY LONG DISTANCE PALS!! Also itd make sense to have a Internet Good message in a digimon show, lol.

And then i dunno about the rest of the team yet but i thought itd be good to have a sort of moral divide? Like these are the two who have a shitty home life and dont want to leave the digital world. But then the other half of the group has big reasons to wanna go home. So the villains could play on this difference in goals and make them fight amoungst each other. Just generally make the villains more actually competant, yknow? Oh also if there's a Dark Agunimon on the villains he needs to be EVEN MORE of a boring human in a costume! Cos it sucks that all the villains have better character designs and the show seems to think theyre worse ones. Give me one case of more boring not meaning more heroic!