#one day your lips will not make me want to bust through a wall like the koolaid man

[andy-clutterbuck]

requested by Anonymous

[satorena]

❝ 𝐈 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐖𝐄 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐅𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐘 𝐎𝐍 𝐂𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐑𝐀 ! ❞

꒰ FEATURING ! ꒱. g. satoru, f. toji, g. suguru, n. kento x afab!reader

꒰ CONTENT WARNINGS ! ꒱. cybersex, camgirl!reader, facetiming, onlyfans account, dirty talking, usage of toys, reader wears lingerie, fingering, anal play, consented video taping, feminine pet names, let’s pretend toji has money okay? okay.

RENA’S NOTE. big shoutout to my dawgs @screampied ! would’ve suffered a bad writer’s block if not for them <3 ly pooks

𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔

“yeah baby~ fuck, arch your back just like that—shit!”

you complied to his request, moaning as you arch your back and push your hips backwards, deepening the angle of which your dildo penetrated inside of you.

from your facetime call, you faced the camera and propped your dildo to the wall behind you. you watched as your ass recoiled like waves, flesh bouncing off the wall in hypnotic motions, giving your boyfriend the pov he demanded at the start of this call.

you watched through your laptop screen as your boyfriend held his cock tightly with one hand, his other hand propped at the back of his head. his stomach clenched tightly as he matched your pace with his jerks. your wet squelches filled the atmosphere followed by your moans, arms stretched out to claw at the silk sheets on your bed.

“mmh—fuck baby, wish you were h-here right now,” you whine, bringing your fingertips to your lolled out tongue, coating the digits with your saliva, before slipping them between your thighs to focus on your neglected clit.

drawing figure eights to the bundle of nerves, your cheek smushed against the mattress, face heating and tears streaking down your cheeks.

bottom lip tucked in his teeth, gojo narrows his cerulean eyes to zero in on your figure, the sounds of your creamy pussy rocking back and forth on your dildo, your teary eyes watching him with such want— and fuck if he doesn’t wish this conference meeting overseas would end so he could blow your back out.

“i know, ‘m sorry— hah, princess,” he whines, thumbing his leaking slit as the hand behind his hair starts to grip at his own locks. the stinging feeling reminded him of you and it only turned him on further.

“just a f—few more days, yeah? and i’m all yours, promise baby, wait out for me,” he prods further, upset at the fact he has to reach out to you virtually. even behind the low quality of your camera, you shone like an angel sent from heaven, lashes wet with tears and your lips glistening from your smeared gloss.

you nod your head, before fluttering your eyes close as your gut begins to coil. your limbs grow hot and limp, toes curling and you up the pace of your rocking, the drag of the customized silicone dildo against your velvety walls stretching you in ways that reminded you an awful lot of your boyfriend.

“toru—fuck, i’m cumming!” you arch your back deeper, chest pressed flat against the mattress, fingernails scratching the softness of your sheets.

gojo had been on the brink of an orgasm eons ago, but he held back for you. to him, nothing beat busting a nut at the same time you did. his snowy white hair matted to his forehead, cheeks flushed a pretty red as he now focuses on his stiff cock with two firm hands.

he mimics circular motions you usually do, fighting to keep his eyes open as his orgasm washes over him just from the sight of your cries alone. your body shudders, your own orgasm washing over you from head to toe as you mewl out his name, spraying your juices all over the wall behind you and down your plush thighs.

your back arches outwards and you’re drooling all over yourself but gojo doesn’t think he’s seen anything prettier in his entire life.

“shit—oh fuck, cum for me princess, make a mess all over—ngh, yourself for me—my perfect fuckin’ girl.”

𝐅𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐎 𝐓𝐎𝐉𝐈

“welcome back everyone~”

there was something terribly sinful in the way the girl currently clothed in skimpy lingerie, fingers rubbing at her pussy in lazy circles with a dildo to her lips, tip of the toy teasingly grazing at her pink tongue—was also the same girl toji paid money to babysit his kid whenever he was away at work.

toji was no good man. this was definitely wrong on many personal levels, but alas he was still a man, if the way his dick hardened painfully quick at the sound of your honeyed voice alone.

he shifts in his chair, leaning back into it as he palms his hard on through his sweats. he watches with narrowed green orbs as you finally swallow the silicone toy down your throat, the dildo lubed in your saliva whenever it came out of contact from your mouth.

“wishin’ it was your fat cock instead, mmh,” you swirl your tongue around the dildo, before arriving to the tip and latching your plump lips around it.

you simultaneously increase the speed at your folds, fingers soon growing sticky with your essence as the obscene wetness fills the room. you moan around the toy, spreading your lips for the camera while clenching around nothing.

dick long freed from his pants and tucked tightly in his fist, toji groans as he watches your pretty pussy flutter and basically beg for him to fill you up. he hacks up some spit and drips it down on his girthy length, before roughly going back to jerking at his dick.

“i wonder which one of my lucky viewers is gonna get to fuck me next live?” you breathlessly giggle, before lowering the dildo in your free hand to your gaping cunt.

your comments flood with praises and pleasantries, with money flowing in easily—anything to capture your attention and have you notice them. they’re desperate, toji thinks, but realizes he’s definitely no better—hands already moving to donate a much bigger sum than whatever pussydestroyer69 could ever offer you.

“ooh, four bills is a hefty amount,” you tilt your head to the side, your pretty lips stretched in a perfect smile. you giggle when the comments start to insult toji but he’s too far enamoured in the way your free hand now travelled to your breast, groping at the mounds and flicking at your stiff buds.

you return to the regular programming, pressing the tip of your dildo to your cunt, dragging it up and down your wet folds, teasing yourself with your legs spread open for the viewers to see.

“fuck— this feels amazing, mmh, ‘m sooo sensitive,” you whine, applying a small amount of pressure to slightly push the tip in but pull it back out.

this was torturous— your thong pushed to the side to reveal your puffy lips as it leaked your essence. toji let his mind run to how badly he wanted to taste you. he was sure you’d be as sweet as honey, a potent taste on his tongue, and the thought of you face down with your ass up, begging for him to eat you out had his balls tightening with eagerness.

“fuckin’ shit— what a tease.” toji grunts, throwing his head back as he rubs the callouses at his palms against his veiny skin. his hips jerked up in anticipation, feeling his limbs run hot while his thumb circled at his reddened tip.

“y’wanna fuck my gaping pussy? yeah, ‘m all wet and tight just for you— hnng, bet i’d have you cumming quicker than you ever had~” you taunt, and finally push the toy all the way in, moaning at the stretch of the toy at your pussy.

your toes curl and you tighten your hold at your tits, slowly thrusting the dildo in and out of your cunt, the slick sound of the friction enticing toji as he matches your pace, fanged teeth biting down at his bottom lip.

you pout your bottom lip, small whines escaping your throat as you fuck yourself desperately. “feels’good— shit, need you to fuck me daddy!”

call him delusional but he felt you spoke to him and not the rest of these bums, legs opened and pussy clenching down at the dripping toy, as your hips rocked upwards to try and meet the dildo for further pleasure.

the telltale of his dick twitching uncontrollably told he was on the brink of an orgasm, one that has him cursing incessantly and brings sweat to his hairline. he pries his eyes open, refusing to miss out on how your folds get abused by yourself, multitasking between thrusting inside and attacking your clit.

“‘m gonna cum daddy—please lemme cum—ngh!” you plead, and as if some force between the two of you is pulled, you spray your essence all over yourself, slick dripping down your sheets and wetting your lingerie, staining your panties soaked as toji calls out your name, hips bucking into his tight fist as ropes of hot cum are pulled out of him.

“there we go baby—damn, keep creamin’ just like that.”

𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐔𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐔

“c’mon mama—don’t you let up, fuck, keep bouncin’ f’me.”

you whined some more, thighs aching and trembling from your consistent riding mixed with the added stimulation to your rim from your gifted anal plug. behind you was geto’s set up, computer camera propped as your back faced it, with geto seated at the edge of the bed.

hands planted firmly onto his chest, you stabilized yourself as you continued to rock your hips, dragging yourself up and down on his inches of dick, feeling his hardness stretch out your walls.

“sugu, ‘s too much— shit, want you to fuck me already!” you moaned, leaning your head downward to his broad shoulders, forehead slippery with sweat.

geto chuckled at your neediness, clicking his tongue as he lands a firm slap to your reddened ass. you all but moaned, hips moving back and forth as you clenched your mounds around his cock.

“but baby,” geto complains mockingly, slipping his hand in between your bodies and thumbing at your swollen clit. “y’wouldn’t wanna disappoint your fans, would ya?”

as he spoke, he glanced over your shoulder to check the comment section, as it was filled with numerous donations, praises as well as degradations. the more his viewers donated money to him, the quicker the toy plugged in your ass vibrated.

the triple stimulation had your brain gone to mush, your golden spot brutally toyed with as the foreign but pleasurable feeling in your puckered hole stretched it out, added with the circles at your bundle of nerves, sending shivers all throughout your body.

“uhn uhn,” you shake your head, all but against the idea of ruining his live stream simply because you were tired. more than anything, you wanted to cum, even if it had been in the most torturous way you could think of.

“that’s my good girl,” geto presses his lips at the crane of your head. his praise sends tingles in your belly, core licking with heat. his hands find their way to your ass cheeks, groping the soft mounds as encouragement, the actions causing a shift in the toy to be pushed slightly deeper inside of you.

“f-fuck—don’t do that, i’ll cum!” you complain, arching your chest into his, sensitive nipples brushing into his own.

the creamy mess at the base of his cock clearly accessible to the viewers sent a massive amount of money right into geto’s account and straight to your ass, as you jolted into his hold, clinging your arms around his neck.

“holy shit—one thousand?” geto asks breathlessly, followed by immediate more pinging indicating more donations. “you’re a hit baby—they fuckin’ love this pussy. too bad it’s all fuckin’ mine though, hah,”

you’re flattered by it all, and hit with a final wave of confidence before you’re sure the dam in your gut will snap, you push him back to lay on his bed. geto watches you with a cocked brow and smug smile, baby hairs messily framing his flushed skin.

“oh?” he asks, amused by the sudden turn of events. he never lets go of your hips, instead tightening his hold on you as you plant your feet to the mattress.

you hop up and down, his dick nearly slipping by how far up you rode him, with your palms pressed against the plane of his abs. feeling tears build up at your lash line, you moan and wail, dick penetrating deep into your cunt deliciously.

“fuckin’ ride this dick, ‘s all yours mama—shit, gonna make me cum all inside that pretty pussy, mmh. give it all t’me,”

it doesn’t take much between his constant praising, the slickness of your wetness around his cock and the additional vibrations to your ass to have you cumming hard around him. you clamp your walls down, momentarily pausing your riding as you let it take over your entire body.

geto comes through, hips bucking upwards to further your orgasm and you’re sure you momentarily blacked out, eyes rolling to the back of your head as your tongue lolls out of your mouth.

“what a pretty fuckin’ face baby, all mine. goddamn, ‘s too bad your biggest fan won’t get to see it— ain’t that right, satoru?”

𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈 𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐎

“k-kento—oh fuck daddy, ‘s so fucking deep!”

his wrist ached as he worked his way up and down his cock, tip throbbing an angry red. he watched himself hold your waist with one grip of his hand, the other propped up to film the lewd scenery, capturing you in all your glory.

nanami maintained a steady focus, pistonning into your cunt at a ruthless pace, a ruthless angle, and judging by the sound of your broken moans, he was thrusting into that spot that had you seeing stars and slurring your words.

on the screen showed you face down with your ass up, hands bind by his tie behind your back, face planted into his bed as he fucked into you passionately. your pussy gripped onto his cock greedily, sucking him in as the ripples of your ass bounced on his pelvis.

“my perfect girl, fuck, keep taking it just like that.” his large hand held at your waist firmly, bottoming out just to pull out all the way to where your lips latched at his tip, coating his dick in your creamy essence.

his hand made it to the top of his shaft, and when the screen presented him an erotic view of both your body fluids— semen, juices, sweat— sticking between both your damp skin, where you lowered yourself on his cock and where he pushed forward to fasten the process, his thumb grazed over his slit tauntingly, the same way he’s seen you done it dozens of times.

it’d never occur to him that watching himself plow into you would turn him on so, but you were so far away and he was immensely turned on.

his button down now unbuttoned, his chest heaved up and down as he panted heavily, sliding his other hand down to cup at his balls, the way you’ve done to him so many times. he winces at the feeling, dick painfully hard as it twitches in his hold.

“holy fuck— my perfect fuckin’ girl, shit.” he groans, narrowing his eyes to focus on the hypnotic sight that had his erection crying impossibly further.

the sight of you unable to do anything but take his dick like the slut you were made to be for him had him curling his feet and thighs tremble rather quickly. your fingers twitched as you begged him to free you, to let you touch him, but all that resorted to was your ass getting slapped for your disobedience.

“behave princess.” nanami warned you while rubbing his hand at the reddened skin, and you whined a ‘m so sorry daddy but obeyed nonetheless, and whatever kink triggered in nanami activated, as he jerked off faster, desperate to chase that release.

in the video, nanami pulled his dick out momentarily, causing you to cry out at your pussy’s emptiness. lowering the camera to your abused cunt, your pink walls gaped and clenched around nothing, practically calling out for him to fill the void. he chuckles behind his phone, before grabbing at his cock and lining himself at your entrance, teasing your folds by dragging his tip up and down before bottoming out again.

“fuckin’ hell, i need you right now,” nanami cussed, wanting nothing more than to feel your warmth around his cock instead of his own hand, to feel you clamp and suck him into your pussy, to have you squirt on his cock and still beg him for more despite your sensitivity.

between the pornographic sight of your cunt clenching down on his cock, your asshole winking at him, the recoil of your ass onto him and the sinful arch of your back, nanami soon painted his fist white in his cum, head thrown back as he was overtaken by an orgasm.

“damn it—shit, just like that princess—keep gripping onto me, gonna fill that pretty pussy full of my cum.”

yes, gojo was the generous donator on geto’s live stream. pervert

[luvelve]

˚ · . lucky strike - c. seungcheol

summary: your first time giving head to anybody and lucky for you, that anybody happens to be your boyfriend seungcheol. you’re kinda nervous because unlike you, this isn’t his first time.

pairing: bf!seungcheol x afab!reader

genre: smut (18+ minors dni!)

wc: 2.9k+ (got carried away again :<)

warnings/tags: making out, oral (m receiving), dirty talk, lots of praise, softdom-ish!cheol, shy & inexperienced reader, bigdick!seungcheol, mentions of food & alcohol, seungcheol & reader are a bit tipsy, use of petnames (baby, angel, pretty), throatfucking, gagging, crying, finger sucking, cum eating

a/n: this is tiktok’s fault for always showing me “he’s the type to talk u through it” type of men. and to me, that sounded like none other than choi seungcheol !! so here we are. forgive me for any warnings i may have missed :< as always, likes/reblogs/feedback are highly highly appreciated ok bye <3

it’s been bugging you for weeks now. it first crossed your mind when you and seungcheol were driving home from a night out with close friends and it just dawned on you how you and seungcheol haven’t done anything yet. well, aside from making out.

seungcheol had told you from the beginning of your relationship that he wanted to take it slow with you. he didn’t want to do anything that would make you uncomfortable. he also told you that things would fall into place eventually and that there was no need to rush. you loved that about him.

but, being the massive over-thinker that you are, you also can’t help but compare yourself to your other girlfriends who have been in longer relationships and what they have possibly already done with their boyfriends.

you feel like you’re ready to do more with seungcheol and that you’re not just pressured by the people around you. you so badly want to bring this up to him but every time you try, you end up steering away from the topic.

the wall clock reads twenty minutes past nine; it’s a friday night and you and seungcheol are in his apartment already in your pyjamas when you should be dressed for a fancy dinner, stuffing yourself with pasta and wine somewhere in hongdae.

it’s been snowing nonstop these past few days and even on the one day that you and your boyfriend reserve every week to go on a dinner date, whether it be at the fanciest restaurant seungcheol can get a reservation at or the mcdonald’s just a few blocks down from his apartment, mother nature just won’t let up.

the two of you were left with no choice but to cook the ramyeon in seungcheol’s pantry. you also thought it’d be a good idea to bust out the remaining bottles of peach and grape flavored soju that had been left over from your camping trip over a month ago.

that was all over an hour ago, soup bowls and chopsticks long forgotten on the table, soju bottles empty, with some random sitcom playing on netflix in the background. you now find yourself on the couch straddling seungcheol’s lap, with your lips heavy on his. both of his hands resting on your waist, just above the band of your his boxer shorts.

breathy moans erupt from the base of his throat and it makes you dizzy. his plump cherry lips find your ear, your jaw, and your favorite spot: your neck.

"baby..." he whispers in between kisses, his hot breath against your skin sends shivers down your spine. all you can do is look at him with heavy-lidded eyes and continue kissing him, but this time sloppier and more desperate. seungcheol notices this and matches his pace with your own, your tongues fighting for dominance.

you don't know if its just you or the alcohol that's in your system, but you know that you want to do more than just kiss seungcheol tonight. plus the fact that you can practically feel his bulge growing under you isn’t helping either.

"nng.." you groan, breaking away from his lips momentarily and resting your forehead on his. your jaw falls slightly open, trying to find the right words to say and immediately, there's worry and confusion painted on seungcheol's face.

"baby, what's wrong?" he says in a hushed manner, his right comes up to your cheek.

“angel, did i do something? hey, you can tell me. hmm?” he adds, not breaking eye contact with you. he carefully fixes his position on the couch, not wanting to bother you.

“i… i-uhh…” you cut yourself off, you’re not nervous but you do want to be careful of how you say it. seungcheol looks at you with his big wet baby cow eyes, silently telling you that you can tell him anything.

“okay… so i couldn’t be more grateful for you wanting to take things slow with the both of us. i mean, really. a-and while i love love being with you like this.. like this close to you…” you trail off, hoping he understands or at least has a bit of an idea of where this is going. you kinda hate how he’s not breaking eye contact, you can practically feel his gaze burning holes into your skin.

“mhmm…” he hums in agreement, biting down on his lower lip as he tries to suppress a smile. he does know where this conversation is going but he wants to hear it from you. his hand falls to the small of your back and he caresses gently, you can feel the callouses of his hands through the thin fabric of your sleeping shirt.

“i feel like i’m ready to… you know… do more with you.” you add, feeling your cheeks and ears heat up. you slouch so you can hide in the crook of seungcheol’s neck but he stops you from doing so. “hey hey, i wanna see your face.”

“so is that what my pretty girl really wants, hmm?" he exhales, the sweet look on his face now wiped away. he sits a bit upright, looking at you with dark eyes. you've never seen him this enamored by you, almost like he's hypnotized, and you haven't even done anything yet.

you only give him a slight nod, your breathing getting heavier, feeling like your heart's about to jump out your chest. again, you don't know what's gotten into you but downing soju in such little time definitely fuels what you're about to do next.

you move your hands from seungcheol's chest and onto his shoulders for stability as you rock your hips back and forth. you start slow and then pick up the pace when you see him lean back onto the couch and close his eyes for a few seconds with his jaw slightly open. you can feel his length get harder each passing second and it sends a pool down your panties.

you lean in to kiss him on the spot near his ears and on his neck and this sends shockwaves through his entire body. he feels like his dick is about to explode and all he wants to do right now is pick you up and lay you onto your stomach so he can have his way with you. but, for now he wants to savor this moment with you.

“mmh, just like that, angel.” he says softly, draping one arm over the couch and the other still holding on to your hips to help keep you stable. his words make you feel good, reassuring you that you’re doing something right despite never having done this before.

your right hand then leaves his shoulder and reaches down to massage the growing bulge under his sweatpants. you look down at him with hooded eyes, hand palming over his cock that’s dying to be sprung free.

“baby, can i put it in my mouth?” you ask. seungcheol’s turned on but also completely thrown off because if anything, he wanted to taste you first. aside from wanting to throw you around and bully his length into you, he’s always dreamt of being in between your thighs and tasting your sweet juices all while you tug at his hair as his name rolls of your tongue.

"i-uhh, baby are you sure you wanna do this? he replies, pushing his own fantasies aside first because he only wants to do more with you only if you're sure you want to. "yeah, i know i wanna do this. i've thought about it for quite some time now." you clarify. and that’s enough for seungcheol.

“okay, angel. i just wanted to hear it from you again." he claims, eyes fixated on yours. he quickly catches your lips for a deep kiss, you can feel the want that radiates off of him. he then interrupts, "although i was hoping that i'd be the first to... go down on you."

while his offer does sound nice and tempting, the thought of you being naked for the first time in front of seungcheol does intimidate you a little bit. not to mention that he's your first boyfriend. you think that it'll help ease your nerves and make you more comfortable if he goes first. a win-win situation, you tell yourself.

"well, i really like how that sounds... but i'm just super a little shy to.. y'know. be naked and all." you admit, struggling to maintain eye contact with him. seungcheol doesn't know whether to be mad, disappointed, or annoyed at himself because you feel this way. he thinks that he may have failed at being your boyfriend because you don't feel entirely comfortable around him. you immediately notice the shift in his face and quickly say something, "and it has nothing to do with you, i promise! it's just... i-i've never done this before." you run your thumb over the pout that's slowly forming on his lips.

you further explain the win-win situation that you came up with and seungcheol quickly processes your words and doesn't feel too bad about it anymore.

"so... will you let me?" you add, referring to your question earlier. he doesn't even have to think about it, and immediately agrees. "baby, i'd be stupid to not say yes."

"i'm gonna need a little bit of help though..." you whisper, looking at him with dark eyes and once again reaching down to continue palming his clothed cock as if nothing happened. "don't worry angel, i got you. we can go slow, yeah?" his voice breathy, and at this point he's already putty in your hands.

you're quick to get off seungcheol's lap and get on your knees in front of him. you're feeling nervous but also excited at the same time and so you reach for the band of his sweatpants to pull them down. he sees this and helps you, his hands hovering over yours as you do so.

despite this being your first time, there's still desperation in your actions. the way your dainty little fingers grab hold of his sweatpants and the way you look at seungcheol. as you pull his sweatpants down, you fail to muffle a gasp. fuck, he's bigger and thicker than you imagined. you already know that it's going to be a struggle holding him and putting him in your mouth. you feel your panties getting soaked at the sight of his throbbing cock in front of you.

seungcheol sits and watches you eagerly, his thick thighs spread out for you and his length already coated with precum. you sit on your heels, still admiring how heavy his cock is. "something wrong, baby?" he furrows his eyebrows, his eyes locked on yours. you don't know how else to put it so you tell him straight, "nothing, you're just... big."

he grins and even laughs a little, "i know you can take it." and so you do, you take the base of his cock into your hand and attach your lips onto his tip. you lower your head to get more of him into your mouth but you struggle to do so. you’re not entirely sure that what you’re doing is correct but you continue your actions. you come back up to swirl your tongue around his tip and seungcheol closes his eyes, "mmh, fuck. just like that, angel. slowly." he's so turned on by the sight in front of him that he can't even bring himself to close his eyes for too long.

he leans forward to gather your hair to one side and to press a quick kiss to your lips, practically tasting himself. you don't stop pumping his cock and so he moans into the kiss, feeling the vibrations erupt from his throat. he leans back onto the couch, and your mouth is wrapped around him again. your hand is settled at the base of his cock, stimulating him as much as you can while you cover his tip in spit. "use both hands, baby." he suggests, and so you do.

seungcheol watches as your hands and mouth move up and down in harmony and it's taking everything in him not to cum right now with your mouth so pretty around his throbbing cock. you take more of him into your mouth and your eyes are welling up trying to do so. his tip hits the base of your throat and he feels it when you gag. he expects you to stop but instead you keep him there for a few seconds until you have to gasp for air and you feel his body shudder at your actions. "angel, you're sure this is your first time?" he asks, gathering just enough breath.

"mhmm.." you swallow, looking up at him with sweet and not so innocent eyes, shooting him a shy smile. you're hit with a wave of confidence by seungcheol's words. he quickly lifts his left hand to push his thumb into your mouth, wanting to feel your tongue. he feels selfish, as if you sucking him off isn't already enough, but he just has to. you follow him by sucking on his finger without hesitation, doing the same things that you were doing to his cock a few moments ago. "fuuck, you're so pretty like this." he thanks his lucky stars because he has absolutely no idea what he's done to deserve you and what you’re doing to him right now.

your mouth returns to his cock, where your hands are still stroking him up and down. you make it your mission to make him cum tonight, wanting to see him all breathy and speechless. your hands and mouth increase their speed, and so does seungcheol's breaths. you can tell he’s close because his chest is rising and falling faster and you’re pretty sure the neighbors can hear the lewd noises spilling from his mouth. you wrap your mouth around him again and again, your head bobbing up and down while you look at him through your long lashes, slowing down your pace for a few seconds to tease him just a bit. where the hell did she learn to do that? he thinks to himself.

all seungcheol wants to do now is pick you up and throw you onto the couch so he can return the favor, but he wants to give this to you. he wants you to finish what you started, because he knows it’ll make you feel good. “taking me so well, baby. doing so good f’me.” the praises rolling off his tongue as he runs one hand through his hair.

seungcheol can feel himself getting closer and closer to his high and so your hands work double time twisting his cock. you spit on his tip and sink your head down, his cock bottoming in your throat again. as you come back up for air, he quickly bucks his hips up to chase the feeling as he’s on the brink of his orgasm. you can’t help but let out a small choke with tears falling from your eyes. “-m sorry, angel. couldn’t help it.” he quicky apologizes. “s’okay…” you reply with a sweet smile.

“hmm fuck, i’m gonna cum. you ready for me, angel?” he trails off, taking control as he strokes himself and his length just inches from your face. you watch him as his big hand goes up and down his cock at an erratic pace. you lift your hands up to rest them on his knees but seungcheol has other plans in mind. “uh-uh, hands on your sides.” he says firmly, and you comply. he wishes he could take a picture of you right now, obeying him and being his good girl.

“open your mouth.” seungcheol adds, his demeanor now completely different but you love that he has two different sides to him when it’s just the two of you behind closed doors. your jaw quickly falls into an ‘o’ and soon after, seungcheol reaches his high. he feels his orgasm throughout his entire body, fireworks shooting down all the way to his ankles. his vision goes white and his body writhes in pleasure. white ribbons of his cum shoot out from his tip and onto your face and in your mouth. you feel the warm liquid on your tongue and you don’t know whether to spit or swallow.

you close your mouth just enough that your lips don’t touch, the salty liquid resting on your tongue. you wait for seungcheol to come down from his high, his breathing getting slower as his hand moves from his cock and onto his thigh. your chest swells with pride because you couldn’t believe what you just did to him. your eyes are focused on him as he leans forward, “you can spit or swallow baby, it’s up to you.” he says, and you feel his breath fan over your face as he brings his hand up and uses the pad of his thumb to wipe off the cum that’s on your cheek and just below your lip.

you finally close your mouth and swallow his salty release, completely tasting him. he watches as your adam’s apple bobs up and down as you do so. “good girl.” he comments, ultimately sending butterflies to your stomach. seungcheol then wastes no time to connect his lips with yours, tasting a little bit of himself. this time around, you’re the one moaning into the kiss and biting his lower lip. he deepens the kiss, holding your cheek to get better access. it’s not rushed though, it’s one that says ‘thank you’ for giving me the best head of my life.

he pulls away and you feel his arms at your sides, pulling you up. he slots you between his thighs, your knees sinking down onto the couch and he looks up at you. “your turn?”

© luvelve — please avoid copying, reposting, revising and/or translating my work on any platform.

[bwabys-scenarios]

HANTENGU CLONES HCs

Karaku+Urogi

SFW+NSFW

Warnings: pet names, tummy bulge, anal, virginity loss, breeding kink, cock warming

background: you are the wife of the hantengu clones

Aizetsu

Sekido

SFW

Karaku

-you call him your lovebug

-he calls you sweet thing, princess, pretty girl, wife

-the most handsy out of the four

-constantly grabbing your hips and nipping at your neck

-the most physically and verbally affectionate

-if you ever need someone to be lovey dovey with, he’s your guy

-taken you on dinner dates

-bro is a biter not even in a sexy way usually, he just randomly bites you all the time

-enjoys watching you have fun

-very pouty when he doesn’t get his daily cuddle session

-very into the domestic life, very much enjoys having a cute wife to come home to

-his favorite place to kiss if your neck

Urogi

-you call him sweetheart, baby

-he calls you his dragonfly, cutie pie, wife

-so hyper

-wants to do so many things at once, he’s your go to if you wanna have fun!

-usually the one to bring home game from the forest(deer, rabbits, and large birds mostly)

-please touch help him preen his wings, he won’t tell you he wants you to run your hands through his feathers but he does back up into you with his wings all fluffed up and in your face

-hates the cold, will steal you to snuggle with in the winter

-understands your humanity the least. What do you mean you can’t be thrown off a cliff into a waterfall he just wants to see who can make the bigger cannonball!!

-dislikes sharing you the most, is known for taking you away for extended periods of time(which highly pisses of Sekido ><)

-makes you a nest and collects the softest materials and shiniest objects to decorate it 🥺

-loves kissing your lips the most!!

NSFW

Karaku

-second horniest clone

-can and will fuck you until you pass out

-he’s huge, gives you a tummy bulge

-coo at him and give him sweet little kisses and he’ll bust inside you instantly

-being in his lap is dangerous. One moment he’s bouncing you on his knee while you tell him about your day the next second your bouncing on his cock

-likes any position where he can see your face, loves to watch you come undone

-little bit of a breeding kink

-likes to cum inside you or on your face

-can’t get enough of your touch, he needs to be flush against you or he whines about not being close enough

-sooo touchy…

Urogi

-hear me out… huge breeding kink

-he built you a whole nest he wants you to have his babies

-only cums inside you, would be a waste not to!

-will fuck you anywhere anytime. collecting herbs in the forest? bend over real quick. shopping for supplies in town? pushing you up against the nearest wall and pounding you

-is the reason you’re banned from the farmers market

-so good with his tongue, will sometimes just eat you out until you can’t walk

-gets extremely jealous of the other four when they take turns with you

-steals you away to have sex in the nest he made for you

-he’s the most likely to actually get your pregnant

-bro does not understand boundaries will crouch down and start sniffing at your crotch randomly and eat your out with no regard for who’s around

-definitely the type to have you in his lap cockwarming him constantly

-THE horniest

-super dirty mind too, def the first to suggest anal and try it out

-takes your anal v card with PRIDE

-his dick is the smallest out of the four (7ish inches) but it’s thick af, praying for your coochie🙏🙏

[pandorainmymind]

giving you an orgasm : atwow headcanon

[jake, neytiri, tonowari, ronal, neteyam, lo’ak, kiri, tsireya, ao’nung] x fem!reader

smut … obviously

tag list: @gurlypopsstuff @lizziesfirstwife @nijirozzz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @areislol @philiasoul and also tagging @netesully

jake:

⊹˖⁺ he wants you cumming around his dick. it's just so much more intimate and erotic to make you cum from his strategic hip thrusts.

⊹˖⁺ like he would stay in your pussy all day if he could. you just take him so well every time. just goes absolutely feral feeling you spasm around him, calling out his name, all of it

⊹˖⁺ coos you through your high, "that's it babygirl, give it all to me" and "you sound so pretty crying for me"

⊹˖⁺ likes to fuck down into you, while seeing every one of your expressions... so missionary is where he's at (don't get him wrong he loves spicing it up too)

⊹˖⁺ he's gonna let out the most guttural moans and grunts - omg and he knows it makes you crazy, clenching around him after every sound from him.

⊹˖⁺ it may make him just a litttttle cocky. "you're so dirty baby, i love it"

⊹˖⁺ likes to press the rough pad of his thumb straight onto your sensitive bud, making small circles as his thrusting slows slightly. just waiting for you to whine out for more

⊹˖⁺ i'm just saying - when he sees you shaking from pure pleasure when you do reach your high .. he's gonna wanna bust right there in you. ... AHHH breeding kink breeding kinkkkkkkkk

his hips snapped expertly straight into your sopping cunt as you frantically threw your arms around his neck. desperately tugging him closer to your face as pleading moans spilt past your lips. "j-jake" squeezing tight around his thick cock, he chuckles feeling the fluttering of your walls accompanied by your babbling cries.

"what is it baby? my cocks too much hmm?" he teases, a low grunt rumbling in his throat as your eyes roll back and your head bobbles to the side. unable to give him a response as he drops his large hand down to fondle your flushed clit.

“i know you love it though y/n, love having me fill you up mmh?”

neytiri:

⊹˖⁺ she wants to rip an orgasm out of you by her fingers

⊹˖⁺ the warmth of your wet heat actually makes her own pussy drip with arousal. it turns her on so much just absolutely abusing the spongy bundle of nerves of your g-spot.

⊹˖⁺ loves to shove her fingers into either her mouth or yours - after you cum, to taste your release (or she'll suck on her fingers, then shove them in your mouth to taste her)

⊹˖⁺ while she fingers you with such diligence, she's gonna take your nipples between her lips at least once, just absolutely making the pleasure heighten. suckling your hard nipples, lapping her tongue over the tip to tease you

⊹˖⁺ she definitely moans against the wet skin of your body as she falters her suckling AHHH

⊹˖⁺ and after she's done abusing your pussy, and the quivering from your orgasm dies down- neytiri is gonna lean down and press a soft kiss to your throbbing and soaked heat.

⊹˖⁺ thennnnnnn she's back up to kiss your lips, "you okay pretty girl?"

⊹˖⁺ she just gets so soft for you - she needs to ask if you're okay after the two of you finish having any form of sex

"you're practically sucking my fingers in baby." she purrs softly, a satisfied smile engraved across her cheeks. and you're quick to nod your head with eager, bringing your hand down to touch your throbbing clit. immediately resulting in neytiri slapping it away with her free hand, "ah - nope, you can't touch"

mewling out desperately from her working hand you give her a small frown - despite the glassed over eyes of pleasure you have. "this pussy belongs to me"

her words earn a staggered response of a nod and moan from you alongside a wiggle of your hips. "mmmh - yours..” you confirm without any hesitation. and neytiri gives you a proud gleam as she towers over your convulsing body. falling deeper in lust(love) with you at the sight and response of your obedience.

“that’s right my y/n”

tonowari:

⊹˖⁺ he wants to be straight between your thighs and eating you out and when you close your thighs around his head - he is going to let out the most MELODIC MOAN.!.! pleaseeee

⊹˖⁺ the man loves eating pussy, just absolutely making out with your heat ughhhh - lapping at all your juices, pressing his tongue flat against your folds, sucking your clit... omfg

⊹˖⁺ likes to rut into the bed/ground(or whatever he can)

⊹˖⁺ he's whipped - and gets so insanely hard from just pleasing you. he likes the pain of not receiving pleasure straight away ... loves being edged by you.. even when it's not on purpose

⊹˖⁺ switch... sub leaning - you cant change my mind. (or he's a service top ...)

⊹˖⁺ likes slipping his tongue in your warm entrance, with his nose pressed right on your clit AHHHHHH. "just can't get enough of you, this pussy... oh baby"

⊹˖⁺ please reach your hands down and pull his HAIRRRR... please please pleaseeeee his hips will literally rut up in response.. SO NEEDY

tightly shutting your eyes, you throw your head back with a lewd cry and a pronounced arch of your back. the sound of tonowari’s tongue slapping against the wetness of your core fills your ears and the blush only dusted across your cheeks, turns vibrant.

“w-wari, please” you whine out, fisting the hair of the large man settled down in between your legs. which leads into a vibrating sensation to wash over your heat as he moans from your tugging.

parting just for a couple seconds to speak, tonowari gulps down the remnants of your slick and looks up at you with hooded eyes.

“i’ll give you whatever you want y/n, just don’t quit pulling my hair” his words almost slur together as he felt in a daze, his raging cock grinding down into the matted flooring of your shared marui pod.

as he dives back to work, your hands embedded in his thick curly hair tug just slightly more as you pull him closer into your heat, his nose pressing up against your sensitive clit.

“oh-! tonowari.. ngh, don’t stop!”

ronal:

⊹˖⁺ she's gonna use whatever she can to fuck one out of you (strappppp onnnnnn)

⊹˖⁺ please, she loves a power dynamic with you... likes being a bitch .. only because she knows you love it

⊹˖⁺ likes to put you on her lap, so you can sink down on her. she's gonna STAREEEEE.!..!.!!!! just seeing her 'dick' disappear inside your pretty pussy makes her mind BUZZ

⊹˖⁺ the coolness of the sea glass strapon always makes your hips jolt at first in such a surprised sensation. and every time she'll just scoff at you and bite her lip

⊹˖⁺ slightly aggressive with her fondling.. she likes squeezing your boobs together and watching your eyebrows knit together

⊹˖⁺ loves when you're vocal with her, and talk dirty back. saying "your cocks t'so good" - or like, "you're stretching me out" with your little moans

⊹˖⁺ she'll literally melt but get so horny!! loves when you're comfortable enough to actually tease back at her.

⊹˖⁺ "my needy little girl, hmm?" a seductive laugh coming from her throat.

ronal smiles deviously below you as she gives a forceful thrust of her hips up into yours. the thick and curved stature of the strapon she keeps inserted inside your sopping cunt kisses your cervix as you cry out against the side of her face.

“oh fuck- so good” you pant out, the heat of your breath fanning down across the skin of her neck. your weak voice makes her hum out in approval as her hips swivel up into yours in a new rhythm and a strong grip of her large hands on your bouncing ass.

desperately rutting your hips down with a feverish effort, ronal’s eyes trail down the backside of your body, watching how your supple flesh squishes underside her hold. “is my cock making you feel good baby? mmh?”

turning your face to press a kiss to her jaw, you moan out loudly and give her a nod. “i’m so close, please don’t stop …”

neteyam:

⊹˖⁺ he wants to slurp up every last drop of your release, loves nibbling on your clit

⊹˖⁺ mighty warrior baby boy, physically drools when he becomes face to face with your pussy. no matter how many times he's gone down on you

⊹˖⁺ doesn't want to scare you off, but if you'd let him, he'd be between your thighs all day long... tasting you is a need for him, he gets so turned on having you on his tongue.

⊹˖⁺ the two of you both make so many whines and whimpers, you - being in such euphoria and neteyam - literally being pleasured by your juices.

⊹˖⁺ he's a biter. for sure. he loves to tease you before he even presses a soft kiss to your heat.

⊹˖⁺ gives you love bites all along your inner thighs, the smoothness of your body is so tempting to cover with his markings.

⊹˖⁺ and if you ever look past his erotic look sucking on your clit, you will ALWAYS see his tail almost wagging as it moves with satisfaction

the digging grip to your thighs and suction to your clit has had your back arched and neck practically snapping for the past moments of neteyam’s pleasuring abuse. his head dove between your legs, his tongue lapping desperately against the folds and the bud of your clit, his moans melting into your heat as he never ceases.

“my nete- OH!” you cry out feeling his teeth graze over your sensitive bundle of nerves, his tongue continually licking and twisting, not leaving any spot untouched.

your hips buck into his mouth and then pull back, causing neteyam to part, “baby…i can't get enough of you,” he says with a whiny tone as his grip to your thighs tightens with a little tug, pulling you back and even closer to his face. “just because you’ve came for me twice already doesn’t mean you’re allowed to leave yet” he huffs out watching your chest rise and fall “i'm not done.”

and finishing telling you how it is, he’s immediately down and eating you out again.

lo'ak:

⊹˖⁺ he's addicted to seeing his fingers gather all your slick, and feeling you clench around him

⊹˖⁺ it lowkey edges him, just from him imagining his fingers as his cock

⊹˖⁺ he's a horny boy, just one look from you with your eyes practically crossed and your mouth hung open in silent and airy cries has him holding his breath and shifting his hips. his cock pulsing with every sound and facial expression from you

⊹˖⁺ likes to put you between his legs with your back against his chest so he can play with your pussy like you would. snaking his arm across your chest a pinching at your perky nipples

⊹˖⁺ and in that position, his cock will THROB against your back as he tries to buck up for friction

⊹˖⁺ ultimately making you more turned on, and he can tell from the way you tighten around his digits

⊹˖⁺ takes after jake and coos you through your high, “you’re doing so well for me love” and, “do you feel how hard you make me baby?”

“fuck y/n” lo’ak grunts lowly into your ear from behind you.

pressed against his strong hot chest, your legs spread out for him, lo’ak’s large fingers dipped into the heat of your pussy pump in and out of you repeatedly at an addicting pace causing a ripple effect of needy sounds to fall from your lips

“your pretty moans are making me go crazy baby,” he lows out, his free hand switching from rubbing and pressing into your lower stomach, “can you feel how much you turn me on?”

his dirty question makes your head fall back against his shoulder, clenching around his digits as the pressure he puts on your lower abdomen creates a newfound pleasure. your eyes flutter shut welcoming the feeling, and truly recognizing lo’ak’s cock pressed hard against the base of your tail as his own arousal leaks from his tip and onto your back

nodding dumbly, you whimper out as your thighs start to tremble.

“you’re so h-hard… it’s so hot”

kiri:

⊹˖⁺ she also loves diving her hand down to fondle your pretty parts. feeling how wet you are makes her horny

⊹˖⁺ kiri loVES mutual masturbation... like yes she's going to pump her nimble fingers into your heat and pleasure you ... but she'll also crumble when you reciprocate her actions and tease her pussy back

⊹˖⁺ but when she's just focusing on you, kiri is gonna lay you out in front of her and just go to town

⊹˖⁺ likes to tease you and give you feathery touches around your pussy, and likes to squeeze your thighs as she gives your wet heat a cool blow of air

⊹˖⁺ she can’t help but let out a sweet and loving chuckle watching you cum around her fingers

⊹˖⁺ she’s just so in love with you and she’d give you the world if you asked

⊹˖⁺ kiri is incredibly dedicated to knowing how to pleasure your body, like every hitch of your breath and moan you let out from a different angle she hits at will automatically register and she’ll adapt immediately. #bestloverthings

the soft pads of kiri’s fingers trail down between your breasts, the feeling causes chills to roll throughout your system and your nipples to harden. the small gasp escaping from your mouth and wide eyes send kiri in a deep trance of your beauty.

“can i make you feel good, my y/n?” she asks with sincerity, her eyes blowing over with lust - and she already has you wiggling your hips in need of attention and friction. the slick of your arousal spreading to the inside of your thighs in a frantic anticipation of her touch

“please… kiri, i need you in me” you mumble out, as you bring up a hand to your mouth to nibble on the skin of your finger. and your brows knit together when she complies with your confirmation with her digits making their way to tease your inner thigh

her thumb rubbing circles against the soft skin, spreading the sticky wetness of your juices around. her other hand fully going down to lightly rub your throbbing clit.

the action erupts a throaty whine from you and a buck of your hips up into her touch

“you’re so pretty, i can’t wait to see you cumming for me”

tsireya:

⊹˖⁺ she takes after her dad, absolutely lured by the heat between your thighs. likes to mix your slick with her spit.. she gets a little messy

⊹˖⁺ her sweet voice whispers up to you with the most lewd sayings. (she wants to see your sweet face flush)

⊹˖⁺ "you know i always thought about eating you out before, when we were just friends... but being able to actually do it now is the most intoxicating thing i've ever experienced"

⊹˖⁺ please please rut up into her mouth so she has an excuse to give you a little slap to your outer thighs... before she completely pins them down.

⊹˖⁺ "come on pretty girl, i know you can take another"

⊹˖⁺ likes to make you cum at least two times before you pry her away from your pussy - but if you squirt around her …. don’t expect to get a break for a long while.

⊹˖⁺ she lOVES MAKING A MESSSSS PLEASE.. idc that she has a shy demeanor, she’s such a tease and sooooo dirty minded

“stop pulling away my love” tsireya chuckles out with a smile plastered across her dimpled cheeks, wrapping her hands around each of your ankles. “i’m still craving your taste”

clasping your shaking thighs together. the throbbing sensation of your pussy from the previous orgasm drives your heart rate up. and taking deep breaths, you mewl out feeling tsireya slide her hands from your ankles up to your knees.

hearing your sultry sound she pauses, humming out soothingly, “can you take another one?” she asks, making sure it’s okay for her to really continue her play time with your pussy

lifting your head up slightly to give her a knowing look, you sigh out with a playful roll of your eyes and a horribly hidden smile. slowly spreading your thighs apart once again, giving her a visual welcome to your heat - and when her eyes drop to take in the sight of your pussy again, you feel yourself clench around nothing in need.

“mmmh, yes… but i don’t think i’ll be able to talk by morning” you say with a tired laugh

ao’nung:

⊹˖⁺ he's gonna make you cum over his cock, it drives him insane just knowing he can pleasure you with just bouncing you on top of him

⊹˖⁺ he’ll give you all the sly smirks and low grunts as he watches you spasm over him in your straddling position with rutting hips.

⊹˖⁺ likes to guide you with a strong grip on your ass, spanking you slightly just to hear the small gasps escape your mouth.

⊹˖⁺ tbh i think he really just wants to let you do all the work as he sits back and enjoys the show - but at the same time he wants to pound into from below, and have you topple over him and let out your moans right in the crook of his neck.

⊹˖⁺ “fuck, y/n you cant even think straight enough to bounce on my cock by yourself” he groans out, creating slapping noises with the repetitive and forceful thrusts into your wet cunt.

⊹˖⁺ he might pull out of you just so you can beg for him to put it back in … he likes it when you beg AHHH , he’s into the slight power play as well

⊹˖⁺ and he’ll go either way with it too - be an absolute douche to you - or be your bitch to use to your advantage… he’s hard for it either way

your thighs burn with the constant bouncing of your ass onto the thick cock of your mate.

moaning out over and over, your volume slowly raises as you feel your insides spasm with pleasure. “shhhh”, ao’nung hushes you quietly with a grab of your jaw, his hand covering your panting mouth. smirking up at you, ao’nung brings his bottom lip in between his teeth with a low grunt from his throat. “baby- i know i make you feel so good, but you’ve got to keep quiet”

nodding your head the best you can in the hold of his large hand over your mouth, your eyes roll back with a muffled whimper when he gives a thrust up into your pussy.

hitting the hidden spongey nerves inside your velvety walls, your legs tremble with pleasure and your knees buckle. causing you to fall forward into ao’nung’s neck as his hold on your face falters. “harder… please, please-“ you chant hushed like, your lips pressed against his skin, your whole body shaking as his hips then begin to continuously rut up into you

“my helpless little girl”

[emeraldborealis]

It's The Same Things

Pairing: Ex-husband John Price x GN!reader

TW//CW: Angst? Anxiety, mention of manipulation, fluff if you squint, John is still trying to change, gender neutral pronouns but use of wife like two or three times.

A/N: I was sad I probably wouldn't get to participate in @glitterypirateduck 's O' Captain! Challenge but coincidently this works with scenario 7, Date night

Words: 7,375

You are currently reading Chapter 2

The Do-Over Series Masterlist - Chapter One - Chapter Three - Chapter Four - Chapter Five

"Yes, let's get started." He took a sip of his drink, licking his lips after. Why did he have to do things like that? He knew. You knew he knew. And he knew you knew he knew. "Question one; given the choice of anyone in the world, who would you want as a dinner guest?"

"Did you memorize thirty six questions or are you pulling these out of your ass?" You chuckled, adjusting to sit crisscrossed, slowly getting more comfortable.

"Admittedly, I memorized them." He leaned back into the couch more, manspreading. Getting himself more comfortable as well. "Now, answer the question."

"Let me think." You pondered it for a moment, thinking of all the people you could, why you'd want to have them as a dinner guest. Who's cooking this dinner? Is it just dinner? Do they have to be alive? "Um, I don't know. It depends on my mood I guess. How about you?"

"You. I'd want you to be my dinner guest." He sounded so sure of it, like it was the obvious answer. You couldn't tell if it was sincere or flattery. You couldn't fathom why out of everyone in the world he'd want you. He seemed to notice your puzzled expression. "Don't look too far into it, I just think you're good company. Entertaining."

"Alright. What's the next question?" This could be fun, this was fun. You loved questions. Loved asking them, loved people wanting to hear your answer. You need to be more optimistic, have fun with this, but remember what John is.

"Would you like to be famous? In what way?" He sat up, leaning his elbows on his knees, curious about your answer.

"I've always thought it could be fun to be an actor. Have fans and go to conventions and be asked questions. It just seems kind of fun, for the most part at least." You shrugged, putting your arms back on the cushions of the couch. "You?"

"Don't want to be famous. Seems like a hassle. If I got famous in my career that would probably mean something bad." He leaned back again, finishing off his drink and putting the glass down on the coffee table. "Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?"

"Every time. Like, every time. I have anxiety." He'd known the answer to this one, he'd watched you do it several times while you were married. It was another thing about you he thought was endearing.

"I don't typically rehearse, but I do collect my thoughts before making calls. There's no point in calling if I'm not going to get to the point and waste time with being a blubbering muppet." That checked out. He was never one to beat around the bush.

"I miss having you order for me at restaurants. That was nice. Or when you'd ask people where things were for me." The previous tension was dissipating, things were quickly feeling like old times. Walls be damned, he was busting through. You were thankful for the layers and labyrinth of defenses you'd learned to build.

"I remember doing that. You were such a nervous thing in public, funny you would want to be famous." He chuckled, recalling all the ways he'd served you and tried to make you comfortable. "What would constitute a perfect day for you?"

"Like a normal day or an activity filled day? Are we talking my perfect mundane day or my 'if money was no object' day?" You asked to clarify.

He thought for a moment, thinking it through, considering how he would like to answer the question himself. "Somewhere in between."

"Okay." You fiddled with the hem of your shirt while you thought. "It'd start with sleeping in, but not too much. Then I'd have breakfast with someone I care about, and leisure around, then go to a park or for a walk or something where I can just talk and spend time with someone, maybe play games, any game would be fun. Just not Clue. Then a scenic drive with good music, if the weather permits, with the windows down. And I'd like to end the day snuggled up in a blanket watching fireworks or stargazing. That would be an achievable perfect day for me."

"Sounds like a good day." He hummed, nodding his head softly. "My perfect day would just be spending time with someone I care about, doing what they want to do."

You laughed at his answer, not taking it seriously. Making him frown softly. "You not caring about what you're doing? Last I checked, that was your nightmare. Not having a plan or control."

"A lot about me has changed. I don't need constant total control anymore. I'm learning to let someone else decide things, to have a say in what goes on when I can. I've found it's really freeing and destressing to not be in control and go with the flow." He defended his answer, nudging your shoulder to try and keep things light. Understanding your reaction.

"Okay, okay. A lot of time has passed. People can change. So, I'll accept your answer." You still found it a little hard to believe, but you've changed a lot too. Maybe he did enjoy being pulled along now, not having to have his brain on all the way and on high alert. Taking joy from some little things. Domestic loving things.

"You'll accept my answer? I wasn't aware you had a say in my answers." His chuckle rumbled through his chest again, making you laugh along, when you did he couldn't stop the smile from creeping up his face. It'd been so many years since he'd heard you genuinely laugh.

"Surprise." You pushed his knee teasingly as you kept laughing. He tried his best to memorize every detail of you in this moment. Tried to remember everything about the second first date with his future wife. There was no way he'd mess this up again. No way he'd let you be the one that got away.

"When did you last sing to yourself and to someone else?" He asked the next question, offering you his hand to help pull you up onto the couch, noticing you weren't very comfortable on the hard floor. There was plenty of room on the couch, he'd remember his manners. He wouldn't bite.

"I sang to myself while I cleaned the house today. I don't recall when I last sang to someone else, definitely in the last few weeks. I think." You were never one to sing for others, whether or not they thought you sang well or not.

"I miss when you'd sing to me. In the car, or late at night when neither of us could sleep, when I'd curl up with my head on your lap and you'd play with my hair and sing to me. I miss having that privilege to enjoy that part of you." The way John would recall things to you always made them sound more pleasant than they really were. More special.

Maybe that part of your relationship was special.

Worthy of being sacred and kept away from the rot of bad memories and hard times that took over the relationship. The pain and ache that seeped into your bones that would act up whenever you were around him. Like he was a storm, you knew when he was coming from the preemptive pain, the warning in your joints.

You couldn't even remember why you ever trusted him that much. Actually gave him those pieces of you. Gave him every piece of you. You were so naive to the ways of the world. When you are born in a burning house you think the whole world is on fire. Think it's just the way life is, to burn and let yourself be consumed by that fire.

But the whole world isn't on fire, and you know now you don't have to live your life suffocating in the smoke of a fire someone else started, that someone else is feeding.

You don't have to burn to prove that you're alive. 

"What about you? When did you sing last?" You asked curiously, trying to remind yourself why you need to keep John at a distance.

"I sang to myself last night. I think the last time I sang to someone else was you, at least the last time I remember singing to someone else. You know I don't sing often." John's singing was a little treat only you were ever given the privilege of hearing, and it really was a privilege.

"What'd you sing to yourself last night?" You were curious, couldn't stop yourself from asking. Even if you had a feeling he was baiting you into asking.

"I sang that song you were always singing to me, no matter how much I look I can't find a version that sounds like how you used to sing it. However, I know the words by heart, so whenever I need that calming memory I sing it to myself." He was trying to show his new effort he was willing to put into your relationship, he was trying to confide in you and admit how much you meant to him.

"You do? Really?" The entire idea didn't make sense to you, it completely went against the mental image of John you'd learned to view in your mind's eye. It didn't feel right thinking he was human too.

Though you'd always known he was human, nothing more nothing less. You'd learned to view him as less. It was easier to justify a beast's actions when they're cruel than a man's, a man who was supposed to be soft and gentle, a man who was supposed to love you how you needed him to.

"Love, I can recall just about every time you sang it for me." His eyes were so soft, you had to remind yourself that that was just the way they were shaped, his features in general were just soft. He was molded so perfectly into a man who looks like being loved by him would be a gift. It wasn't.

It was like performing CPR on someone who's been dead for several days now, rigor mortis had already set in and passed, with each passing moment more dirt was being put atop the grave of what used to be, and if you weren't careful you'd both be buried with it trying to bring it back to life. 

Dead things needed to stay dead.

"I didn't know it meant that much to you." Your admission forced you to think about it more, to remember how he'd be able to breathe deeply, how you could watch him visibly untense and relax, how he'd hum along. How deep his voice would get in those quiet, secret moments.

"If you were able to live to the age of ninety and either retain the mind or body of a thirty-year-old for the last sixty years of your life, which would you choose?" His next question brought you out of your sudden wandering of thoughts into memories.

"Probably body, my bodies already got enough issues, not really looking forward to seeing how it continues to degenerate with age." You forced a small laugh, trying to stop viewing him how you once viewed him. He's changed now, you need to view him as he is now. See him as a new person.

A new person with a history you couldn't just erase from your mind.

"I'd keep my mind. I can endure anything as long as I'm still aware of who I am, and who the few people I care about are. I don't want to forget the things I love." John was still a man who liked control, he needed to maintain some semblance of it, needed to know that at any moment he could take the reins. Most importantly he needed to be in control of himself, who he is, who he was, and who he will become.

"We'd be a funny combination to see, a young fellow with an old man, the old one being the conscious of the two." You chuckled, imagining how funny it could be, but then you started thinking about it more, a fear blossoming in your chest. "I don't want to get old. I don't want to forget things, I don't want to be aware of my body dying and giving out. Not being aware of it almost sounds worse though. Dying isn't really scary to me, but the things that come with age do. So, I hope I die before then."

"I'd take care of you." John put his hand on your knee, he wasn't trying to push boundaries, he was just trying to comfort you. Put pause in your racing thoughts. All your doubts, all your fears.

"You'd probably be dead by then." You pulled away from him, removing his hand from your knee. You couldn't let him close again. You didn't like the thought of him being there when you weren't mentally. So, you removed him from the mental picture. Anyway you could.

He couldn't be in control of you, he couldn't make decisions for you. He couldn't choose what was best for you. He wasn't allowed to decide to end or prolong your life. It was your life. You didn't want to think about the choices he'd make for you. He wouldn't be there. He'd be dead. He wouldn't be left with the home of your soul but not your mind.

"I think we should skip the next question." He rested his hands on his knees, he seemed almost small in this moment. His voice carried a meekness you'd only heard a few times before. He was hurt.

"Okay, then what's the next question you'd like to ask?" You hadn't meant to hurt him. You hated hurting people. Hated knowing you were the cause of someone else's pain.

This was once again not going well. You didn't have to look hard for the reasons this wouldn't work out. There was just too much history to be able to ignore it. Too much you'd both done.

"Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common." He seemed a bit more hopeful with this, a turning page, a way away from what the last question had dug up. A step away from the skeletons and fragments of wooden casket left from your last relationship.

He wasn't trying to resuscitate your past relationship, he was trying to start a new one. A new relationship with someone he already loves, someone he already knows how to love.

"Three? Okay, let me think." You pondered it, trying to think of things you had in common. "We both prefer to watch movies over sports, we both hate when people rub it in when we lose, and we both like games where everyone works together against the game to win." You smiled softly when you successfully thought of three things, it was a little easier than you thought it'd be. You just had to remember the good moments you had.

"Game nights with your family were actually a nightmare. I've had missions that have threatened my life less." His small smile was back now, his cheeks soft and round, his facial hair making his cheeks look bigger. He looked so harmless smiling like that. You knew better though.

"Oh please, they were only that bad sometimes." You rolled your eyes at him. "You get used to it, it doesn't phase you after a while. Besides, that's why I moved away in the first place. One visit every year or two is manageable. Gives time to allow distance to let fondness grow. It's your turn to answer the question." You nudged his shoulder, curious about what he would come up with.

"Alright, let me think. We both liked when you'd dump info on me about the plots of things you were into." He adjusted on the couch to fully face you, his arm resting on the back cushions, his head resting on his hand.

"You liked that? I thought you would get annoyed with me sometimes when I'd do that." His answer was surprising to you, you'd never known he'd enjoyed when you'd ramble on and on to him. You adjusted, matching his position, mirroring him.

"Hindsight is twenty twenty, my dear. I look back at it fondly. Didn't you just say distance brings fondness?" He had the audacity to use your words to prove his point. "More than once Johnny or Kyle have been saying something and I've only understood it because of you."

"Who's Johnny and Kyle?" You ask curiously, not following, but finding it somewhat sweet that in a roundabout way you've helped him bond with people.

"My boys, my team." He explained, with how soft his expression was you could only imagine how much he cared for his team. He'd always been one to get attached. "You made me a better soldier by helping me remember my humanity."

Taking in his words a piece of yourself felt a little bit better, a warmth in your heart, like it was remembering how to beat properly. Beat with a sense of pride. "What are the other two things we have in common?" You didn't plan on letting him stop at three, you were too curious about what he would say.

"We both like live music, and neither of us like to sleep with socks on and are adamant about it." He listed the other two things, teasingly grabbing your foot and shaking it before letting go, playing with you, swatting at his hand, you returned the playfulness. "What do you feel most grateful for in your life?"

"Probably the people who have helped me learn and grow, the people who have supported me and made me feel of worth." Your answer seemed a bit basic to you, but it was truthful. 

"I'd say the same." John agreed, nodding his head softly. "If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?"

"That's a really deeply personal hard question." You weren't sure you wanted to answer it, weren't sure if you could pick just one thing, weren't sure you could stop yourself from spilling out too much of yourself to him again. He knew the story of your childhood and youth, nothing had changed. 

"You don't have to answer it if you don't want to." His reassurance almost caught you off guard, he seemed more understanding now than he used to be. He didn't want you to have to dig up anything painful for you.

You took a deep breath, letting out a heavy sigh. "It's okay, I'll just be brief. I would have liked to have more friends around my age, to have been properly socialized. Not just have adults to talk to or try to play with. I wish that part of my development had gone better, instead of how it did. It's just something I have to live with everyday. Seeing people but feeling like there's something between us, like a glass barrier. Like everyone knows I was the kid no one wanted to talk to. The weird kid in the weird family." 

John's hand reached for your knee again, but he stopped short, letting it fall on the cushion between you two, there if you wanted it, but at a distance. "I'm sorry."

"Not your fault." You put your hand over his, he turned his over and held yours gently but reassuringly. 

"Even still." He squeezed your hand softly. "I wish I'd had someone to tell me that they were proud of me, that I was doing well." His words made a part of you hurt. He'd never had support in his youth.

"I think we could have worked out, like really worked out, if I just wasn't me, and you weren't you. If we weren't children raised like adults. If we'd been given a better start, a fighting chance. If we knew how to be healthy for ourselves, we could have been healthy for each other." You squeezed his hand back before slipping out of his grip, pulling your hand back. 

"I don't want to answer the next question, so we'll skip it." He looked down at his now empty hand, the feeling of you pulling away again eating at him. He needed to be able to keep you. He was nothing but an empty cage without you.

"Then we'll skip it, whatever it is, we can skip it. We can make the rules to this game, we don't have to do anything either of us don't want to." You gave him the same out he'd given you. Frankly, if it was a question he didn't want to answer you didn't really want to know what it was. 

"If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?" John asked another question, a small smile coming to his face as he adjusted once again on the couch, scooting slightly closer to you. 

"Telekinesis would be super useful." You didn't even have to think about it, but then a sudden embarrassing realization hit you. "Or.. did you not mean a superpower?"

He chuckled at your eager answer. "I was more so thinking of a skill, but superpower works too, love." 

"Well, if it's a skill I'd probably pick something like learning an instrument or being able to create something useful. Or like how to fix something." You gave him another answer, still feeling a little stupid for taking it wrong.

"I think invincibility would be a very useful superpower." He smiled at you, giving his answer, he didn't want you to feel like an idiot for taking the question another way. "But skill wise, I've always thought sculpting looks fun, or woodwork. I watched a man carve out a canoe from a big piece of wood in a documentary once."

"Not you and your documentaries. Gosh, those were all you'd watch when I didn't pick a show or movie. That and those survival shows." You laughed, teasing him.  

"Knowledge is power, my dear. You never know when you'll need to know something." The possessive pet name made your chest feel tight. You could feel John breaking through another wall, making his way through the labyrinth of your defenses. He wouldn't stop till he held your heart again, or died trying to.

"Okay, well when I'm lost in the woods and need to know how to survive and build a canoe I'll call you." You moved to be sitting on your legs, moving closer to John in the process, a wolfish grin spreading across his face.

"If you're lost in the woods and call me I'll just come get you." He chuckled, his eyes taking in your new sitting position. "If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?"

"'Am I genuinely a good person?' Or, maybe something like 'what is a simple thing to do or change about me that would positively impact those around me?' there's also you know... more materialistic thinking of 'what can I invest in that will make me rich beyond my wildest dreams?'" You listed off a few things, finding this question a lot of fun.

"I would ask for guidance on how to fix my wrongs." He seemed genuine, if not a bit sad. He really had changed, and he really was still trying to change. He wanted to make amends.

"I think most people would like an answer to that." You nodded in understanding. "Do you think all wrongs can be fixed? Be forgiven?"

"I'd hope so. If not, there's still a point in trying, don't you think?" It was a sad thought thinking you could never right some wrongs, that all the bad things you've done would just always be there, always haunt you. 

"Yeah, I'd hope so too. I think there's always a point to try and become better. Even if you're not forgiven." Forgiving yourself for the wrongs you've done was half the battle, allowing yourself to move on. Letting yourself let go of some of the weight and burden of hating yourself for something that you'd done.

He nodded, seeming to think it over for a moment. "Is there something that you've dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?" 

"There's a lot of things I've always wanted to do, sometimes life, money, and even other people get in the way. Maybe one of these days I'll be able to get a few things off my bucket list." You felt like a lot of people had things they dreamed of doing, some things just needed to find a window of opportunity to actually do. 

And sometimes some things just aren't meant to be, life's rejections are sometimes protection. You tried to remember that.

"Can I tell you something stupid?" He leaned in closer, a mischief to him you'd only seen a few times. When you nodded he continued. "I think it would be fun to swing on a chandelier, but I wouldn't want to break one." His confession made you burst out laughing. 

"I've always wanted to do that too! But yeah, I don't think it's 'socially acceptable'." There were lots of things you would do if you wouldn't be judged for them. "If you ever find a chandelier on a deployment you could do it, I mean no one would know if you broke it or if a stray bullet did."

"I don't mess around in the field. Learned my lesson a long time ago." He shook his head softly. "What is your life's greatest accomplishment?" 

You tapped on your lips in thought, trying to think about it. "That's a hard question, maybe sticking with things? Seeing them through till the end. I don't want to choose just one thing, since I've done a lot. But none of it would have been possible without the desire to finish them. So, my resilience?" 

"Works for me." He smiled. "Sometimes I wonder how I was ever able to get you to marry me in the first place, so I'd say that. Even though we didn't last forever, I still had you for a time, and I think that was my life's greatest accomplishment."

"Not being captain? Or any of the medals or anything?" You were surprised that he saw his time with you as his greatest accomplishment. 

"No. Being with you proved I at least had good taste once." He was trying to flatter you, it was working. A warmth spreading through your chest, you could feel it creeping out through the rest of your body, he seemed proud of himself for getting this reaction from you. "What do you value most in a friendship?" 

"Communication and understanding." You'd thought about this a lot over your life, took notice of what worked and what didn't work in past and current friendships. "Also, you know, I appreciate when people don't become my friend because they want something from me."

"I agree, those things are what I'd say are most important." He gave a little nod, happy you were on the same page about this. "What is your most treasured memory?"

Your face lit up as you remembered something. "Do you remember when we went to the theater to watch that movie? I don't remember what movie it was, but it was awful. Like really bad. And so we ended up talking through it, whispering and laughing back and forth."

"Yes, I remember that." He softened, recalling the date with you.

"I remember it was just us and one other person in the whole theater. And he got up and he complained about us, and we got kicked out of the movie. I remember being so grateful because I did not want to watch that movie anymore but I didn't want to say anything." You continued to recollect your past date. 

"Why didn't you say anything? I would have been okay with walking out. It was a cheap showing." He laughed, finding your eagerness in retelling this story to him despite the fact he was there cute.

 "Anyways, then we went and we got ice cream together, and we drove out to the secluded park with all the trees and we parked there to make out in the car like teenagers. Then that police officer came up to your window, tapped on it a few times. And he said that we can't be doing what we were doing in a public place, it was 'indecent'." You rolled your eyes at that.

"I was so mad. I was not going to be very nice to him, but I restrained myself, as far as I remember." John was enjoying watching you get so animated about this.

"I don't think I'll ever forget what you said to him, you said 'I spend enough time away from my wife, I'm not going to waste a single second not loving them when I'm with them.' I knew then that I would love you forever. But somewhere between then and our divorce, you stopped loving me like that. And I knew it was time to say goodbye. Knew we were already over." You looked down at your hands, the memory turning sour.

"I never stopped loving you like that. I just- I forgot how to let go of myself to remember how to treat you like that. Things got tense between us. I'm sorry for perpetuating that rather than fixing it." He was so sincere in his words, in his regret. 

"What about you? What's your favorite memory?" You let it go, you didn't want to rehash things.

"It was right after I'd gotten home from a longer deployment, I'd gotten home in the middle of the night, and you were so tired. You'd slept in till noon, head on my chest. I didn't feel like I could sleep yet, still too stuck in work mode. I committed your face to memory, the way your mouth was slightly open, drooling on my shirt. You soaked right through. I'll never forget the feeling of that damp spot from your drool on my chest." He seemed to think of this fondly, but you were horrified. 

"I drooled on you? And you let me? I'm so sorry, that's so gross. Why didn't you move me? Didn't you think that was gross?" You couldn't stop wondering how often you drooled in your sleep now, how often you'd drooled on him. 

"You were asleep, it's not as if you did it on purpose." He seemed so unfazed by it, like it was perfectly normal. Which only added to your horror. How many times had you done this? Why did his favorite memory have to be one where you were so... human. 

"Out of everything that's really your most treasured memory?" You couldn't fathom why.

"Yes, it was a very simple relaxing moment. You were safe, I was safe. It was just us two in our bed. No one else, nothing else. Everything was at peace. Because of you I was at peace." You hadn't thought of it like that. "What is your worst memory?"

"What the hell kind of question is that? Let's bring up something happy and then immediately bring up something so traumatic and mind altering it's to the point it plagues your consciousness." You made fun of the question, making John chuckle and shake his head.

"You don't have to answer it." He reminded you. 

"Well, it's too late. I've already thought about it." You sighed. "When I was around thirteen I just wanted to fit in, be like the other kids. I was tired of being seen as weird. I was tired of wearing second hand clothes, so I asked my mom for something in style, she got upset, I mean money was tight. I understood that. But, she looked me dead in the eyes." You paused, closing your eyes for a moment refusing to let yourself get emotional.

John took your hand, squeezing it softly, he'd never heard this story before. "And?" He prompted softly. 

"And, she told me that I did not deserve nice things, that I wasn't worth nice things." You finished. "I know she just meant clothes, or something. I don't know. But it's always stuck with me, more than any other hellish thing people have said to me. It's weaseled it's way a little too far in my mind. Spread into everything. Poisoned my perception of what I'm allowed to let myself have." 

"Love, look at me." He gently tipped your head up to look at him, looking into your eyes. "You are worthy of nice things. You deserve nice things. You deserve whatever is best for you. I'm sorry. I'm sure there's more to that story or ideation than you said, but you don't have to tell me. It's okay."

"I guess it's your turn to tell me your worst memory. Maybe we should have skipped this question after all." You laughed a little, trying to pretend you weren't just getting emotional, trying to not let it hurt again. 

You were trying not to let something that would hurt him slip out of you. You couldn't say more, if you did you'd be too honest. You'd twist the knife you were sure you'd already left in his heart. 

"When you handed me the divorce papers. I remember that day in such vivid detail. Fuck, I'm sorry. For everything. All the things I said when I realized it was over, there's no excuse for it. I'm sorry. I don't even remember all I said, I just remember this buzzing in my head, and your face. I remember your expression." He stopped himself from saying more. Too much guilt eating away at him. 

"We should have skipped this question." You decided, looking away from him for a moment. "What's the next one?"

"Um, what does friendship mean to you?" You were surprised you actually got John to a point where he used a filler word. He never used filler words, you were sure for so many years that he was incapable of using them seriously. That he had trained himself out of using them.

"It means everything, I believe any successful healthy relationship should first be built upon friendship. How can you be with someone who isn't your friend too?" Sometimes the thing you missed most about John was his friendship, he was a good friend, your best friend at one point. 

"Trust often comes with friendship, so it's really important to me. I need people to trust me so they'll listen to me." He collected himself once more, standing up he took his glass into the kitchen before coming back with it half full, probably all that was left in the bottle.  

"That makes sense, I can see how it could affect how well the job gets done without that level of trust." You nodded, letting him settle back into his spot on the couch. "Do you consider your team as your friends?"

"I'd say so, they're good lads. Stressful, reckless at times, they keep me on my toes. But yes, I'd say they're friends. To a point. Not people I'd go to about my personal life." He explained their relationship, taking a sip from his glass. 

"Do you have any friends you can talk about your personal life with?" You were curious if he had any kind of actual support system, he was never the best at those kinds of friendships. He saw the allies he could call for help in a fight as close enough to that. 

"No. I don't." You couldn't view him as your responsibility, couldn't offer yourself to him in that way just because he didn't have anyone else, but that horrible part of yourself that needed you to give yourself away and fix people was begging for someone to take care of. People aren't projects, you have to remind yourself that. 

Especially not John. The only person capable of fixing John was John. If you ever tried he'd tear you apart, the last time you tried you were the one who needed the fixing. Or maybe you needed fixing the whole time. It's hard to say.

"I'm sorry. I try not to talk to people about my issues, I always regret it after I say something. People talk, views change, it's more trouble for me than it's worth. But I know you're more social than I am, I know you like to talk to people, even if it's not necessarily about your problems, you just like talking about life." You felt bad for him, you hoped he wasn't isolating himself.

"It's alright, love. Not your fault." He pat your shoulder, making you playfully roll your eyes. You were about to say something, but he cut you off. "What roles do love and affection play in your life?"

"Every role? I try to love everyone, try to understand they're human and flawed, just as I am. I love the idea of love, I like loving people. And you know I'm an affectionate person." You picked at your nails a little as you answered.

"Your version of affection is a bit unconventional, but it's still endearing." The jest in his voice did little to amuse you.

"Gee, thanks." You were deadpan with him, making him chuckle and shake his head, before finishing his glass and putting it down. "Just answer the question."

"It was supposed to be a compliment." He clarified. "Love and affection don't play as much of a role in my life as I would like. I would like to love more than I ever have, and I'd like to actually express that love rather than assume it's just understood without action."

"Maybe you should love 'your boys'." You snickered, hiding your mischievous smile behind your hand. 

"I suppose you think you're terribly clever." He scooted closer to you, testing how comfortable you were with him getting closer. 

"I don't think-" He cut you off before you could finish your sentence.

"Clearly. Completely hollow up here" He softly knocked on your skull, making you scoff in mock hurt, laughing from his unserious attack. 

"Okay, rude. What's the next question?" You absentmindedly scooted closer to him, when he put his arm on the back of the couch you came closer, sitting on your calves and facing him.

"It's more of an activity, we're supposed to take turns sharing positive characteristics about the other." He explained. "I'll go first, you're one of the fastest learners I know."

"I thought I was stupid?" You teased, a bit smugly. 

"I lied." He sighed, but he didn't actually seem annoyed or upset. 

"So, now we're lying?" You pushed, making him give you a look of warning not to go there. "Okay, okay. You're charming. In your own way."

"That sounds like a backhanded compliment, but I digress. You're passionate about things you like or care about."  He relaxed again, moving slightly closer, your knees touching his thighs now. The touch was distracting you, how right it felt. How wrong you've felt going so long without him.

"You are too." It was an easy answer, one you didn't have to think about much, a cop out. But still an honest answer. 

"You are a calming person, you're easy to be around." You smiled softly at his words, leaning into him a little.

"You never give up, you're persistent and you achieve your goals." Both of you were more relaxed now, sinking into each other. Getting ever closer. You couldn't even hear the alarms going off in your mind, choosing to ignore them to just have a nice moment. 

"How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?" His question ruined everything, reminding you to keep your guard up, to remember this was still the same John Price you were once married to, even if he wanted to act changed.

"Really? We're bringing up my mother again? Okay, it's complicated. I still love her, and I understand that she was the way she was while I was growing up because of her own trauma, but at the same time, I was just a kid and didn't deserve the things I went through because of her." You sat up more, pulling away from him, keeping your knees touching his thighs. 

He didn't say anything about you pulling away, he tried not to show his disappointment. "It's just the next question. I'm answering it too. I love my mother, she worries about me a lot. But we're not close. Never have been overly close."

"Okay, fine. Next question." You just wanted to move on, family was a hard topic, you didn't like to linger on it. 

"There's only a few questions left, most of them are like the characteristic activity, which we can skip. The next question is, when did you last cry to someone else and when did you last cry to yourself?" He didn't really think this question was any better than the last, he still asked it though, these were questions that were supposed to bring the two of you closer. They were supposed to make you fall in love again, or at least maybe help resolve something. 

"I don't know when I last cried to someone else, I try not to do that. It's been a while since I've cried in general. I think I've been suppressing my feelings and emotions. I don't really know how to stop though." You confessed, confiding in him. 

"That's okay, you'll cry when you need to." He pat your shoulder comfortingly. "It's been a while since I last cried to myself and even longer since I cried to someone else."

"The day we learn to feel our emotions properly is probably the day the world ends." You joked, making him chuckle.

"Probably. Alright, love, what, if anything, is too serious to joke about?" He asked curiously.

"Dark humor has its time and place, and of course coping through humor is a thing, context is also important. However, human trafficking is hardly ever funny, in any time or place. You know, like the really serious stuff like that I don't really find funny." You felt that was a pretty reasonable answer.

"I can't argue with that." He agreed. "Last question. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?"

"Just one thing? Probably my keepsake box, it has everything important to me in it. It also has  my birth certificate and that kind of stuff in it." There was so much importance in one small box, losing it would be the worst thing ever. "And you?"

His face softened as he thought about it. "My ring, I would want to go back for my ring." 

"You still have your ring?" Your voice was soft as you asked the question. It shouldn't have been as surprising to you as it was, a part of you was internally preening, but another part of you was devastated by hearing that.

He still had his ring, he was still holding on to what was. He was still holding onto you. John Price still saw you as the person he promised to love, to have and to hold, for as long as you both shall live. 

"Do you?" He asked curiously, leaning in a little closer to your face, trying to read every possible emotion and thought you could be having. 

"Maybe somewhere, it was really nice, so it's probably in a box or something. You know I struggle with getting rid of nice things." You fiddled with your fingers a bit nervously, you weren't expecting him to turn the question back on you and had to scramble for an answer. 

"I remember well how much you struggle with getting rid of nice things." He chuckled a little, watching your hands fiddle. When you were married you'd play with your wedding ring, but you hadn't made a habit of wearing rings since the divorce. 

You perked up a little at the thought of a question coming to your mind. "Okay, you've asked me many questions, and we've both answered them. Now, I have just one question for you, when we ran into each other again, was that really a coincidence? Be honest."

John contemplated it, running his hand over his facial hair. Thinking about how he wanted to answer this. What truth or deception could give him in the long run. Whether or not he was ready to give you this answer yet. Honesty was important, more now than ever.

"No."

Tags: @waiting-so-long @little-laamb

[bowieandqueen11]

Small Spoon / Joel Miller Imagine

Request: sis i am a simple woman

i saw small spoon joel and now i need a fanfic

GIRL I got you I got you @aninnai​

Also sorry in advance I mixed a bit of what happens in the game with what happens in the show for fun lmao​

If you enjoy, please comment and let me know! It really helps so much :)

Warning: strong language, mentions of explosions and injuries/blood, mentions of drugs and alcohol, mentions of guns and a little nsfw!

(I do not own the Last of Us or its characters, all rights go to creators. Gif credit goes to @lousolversons.)

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°

Like the Boston quarantine zone, the apartment was draped in darkness by the time you slammed the door shut.

It had been a disappointing day all round: first Robert steals your guns and pills and decides for extra fun to jump you on your way back home, then queen Firefly herself decides that during your excursion through the other side of town’s checkpoint is the perfect time to bomb the place. You spent half the time trudging back along the side streets picking shrapnel out of your bleeding shoulder, and the other half waving off some straggler friends who were concerned about the new bust over your lip.

‘Robert. It was that goddamn Robert again’, you’d say and wave them all off back to their card games or their street sweeping duties. A few raised eyebrows or wolf whistles as they turned, but everyone knew that with Joel and you still together, it wasn’t you they should be worried about. It should be the fury in Joel’s eyes as soon as he found out a hair on your head had been harmed; it was the warpath, the ravage, the raging heart flinging and panging against the bars of its cage that would bring the whole state to its knees with its laceration.

The docks could wait till tomorrow. To be honest, at the moment, you were that tired you couldn’t really care less about your new lot of lost cargo. All you wanted to do right now was to kick off your muddy boots, crawl yourself into bed, and splat your face straight into the warm, broad expanse of the man that would be waiting there to lie beside you.

Speaking of, Joel had promised he would try and wait up for your return. By the way you shouldered your splintered apartment door, pushing with all your force until the creaking hinges finally gave in and swung open to the familiar musty smell of your shared room, you could already tell he hadn’t managed it. Instead of a pistol to your face in the case of you being a stranger, or one of Robert’s men, or even some half-hearted grumbles of salutations from the man who should have been hunched over the table trying to fix the new dent in his pistol, you were greeted with slain silence.

As you kick the stack of training manuals by the kitchen counter out of the way, the train of events before your arrival back home became even more crystal clear. By the half-thrown chipped tumbler and the fractured looking pill bottle left abandoned on the dining table, it wouldn’t even take FEDRA’s soldiers two guesses to find out how well his day had gone too.

You tiptoe around the side of the bed and squint, barely able to make out the gentle rise and fall of the sleeping man’s chest through the broken slants of the shades. Bless his heart, even in his sleep the crinkles in his forehead are as deep as the currents of the Allegheny River. He must be having a nightmare, from the way his mouth keeps fumbling and his fist squeezing into the frayed edge of his pillow. Even the vapours of moonlight that slanted in through the cragged skyline, the sharp pelts of spotlights that skim from time to time through your bedroom window like phantom shadows couldn’t soften the man’s haggard face. 

With a sigh, you press the back of your hand fondly over the scruff of his cheek, trying not to wake him as you lean down to press a quick kiss against the creases on his forehead. No amount of light seemed to be able to crack through this man’s walls; no peace, little hope, and even less optimism, and still his fingers move out across the bed to try and reach yours as if on some invisible tide.

The gesture is small, but coming from Joel Miller it meant everything. It isn’t much, but you were the first person in twenty goddamn years he was willing to offer the remains of himself, his heart up to. So far, you hadn’t let him down; if you did, the both of you knew that he would regress even back further into himself, warping back into the shadow of a man he had been all those years ago when Tommy first left. When he left behind nothing but repressed rage and grief and a loathing so inflamed it could have scared a clicker stiff. At himself, at his brother, at the world - you could never tell. But you understood one thing for sure: Joel Miller wouldn’t be able to survive another loss. It would destroy him, change him too far beyond recognition that even he couldn’t come back from it.

You could tell from his dreams, that in the end, that’s what he thinks he deserves. And yet he always still reaches out, in one way or the other. ‘That’, you think as you let your hand fall from his face and flop it back down towards your lap ‘is the part of him that Sarah managed to get. That sweetness is just begging to be let out.’

You smile as you stand up and stretch, taking in a needed deep breath after the day you’d had. The same day you’d had for the last ten years, over and over again. And yet it was worth it, as you paced over the creaking floorboards and headed over to your side of the mattress, if it always ended like this: with comfort, stability, and a beating heart beside you.

‘Scootch.’

Only an incomprehensible murmur and two barely blubbering lips were your sign that Joel had even recognised what you were saying, but after a groan he obliged and shuffled his body over to the right. It left you ample of opportunity to slide in stealthily behind him, Joel already lifting his arm up in anticipation for the feel of your fingers over the side of his jean shirt.

For his sake, you pretend that neither of you notice the tremble that rushes like shooting spores straight down the muscles of his body. Instead, you relish in just languidly letting your fingers float like fireflies over the side of his hip; you spread them out, dancing through the coarse light just before you reach the bone. You scratch against the material, letting it ride up until your fingernail comes in contact with his flushing skin. Teasingly, you grab at the meat of his hip and enjoy the way he puffs out, unconsciously pushing himself back against you. You trace your fingers further forward, inch by inch, tracing the inseam of his jeans...and then suddenly stop. You only start again when he gives a hoarse groan in warning: one that reverberates through his back and makes your breath hitch as it grumbles against your chest.

You press yourself flush against him, giving in and properly wrapping your arm round his waist until your hand reaches his stomach. Finding his bellybutton, you give it a little poke which earns you a kick back from his leg in retaliation, but you can hear the light chuckle he admits despite himself.

‘Late night again, huh?’, he mumbles out. His pursed lips are half open and don’t rise from the pillow. As he lethargically blinks a couple of times, he pretends it’s because he’s too tired too move. He knows deep down in the pit of his stomach, though, that you’re too astute that let that lie fly over your head. You know the man too well, and you know damn rightly that he’s enjoying the feeling of your face smooshing itself into that little soft dip to the side of his shoulder blades. He’s just far too stubborn to ever admit it. But even so, Joel Miller’s silence speaks wonders.

‘Oh, same old same old. Robert’s being a little asshole again.’

‘Oh he is now, is he?’, he turns his head, making as if he’s trying to get up but your quick to push him back down again.

‘He and his little gang of morons can wait until tomorrow. I, on the other hand, am freezing cold. And you, Joel Miller’, you squeeze your arms into a vice around him and lift your legs up to slide in between his knees. They rest heavily, tangling against your own, and the weight is the most wonderous thing you’ve felt all day. ‘You are the best source of heat in all the damn zones put together.’

He lets his elbow rest comfortably on top of your own despite your words, so used to the back and forth between the two of you by now that they just wash over him. In fact, when he feels your forehead bump against the small litter of freckles you know line the left side of his shoulder, that spread of constellations running from the dip of his neck down his left shoulder blade, he even chuckles.

You feel his hand slide down from where it was resting under the cup of his chin to entangle with your fingers. He tugs them in to the heat radiating from his chest, and you take the opportunity to scratch out against the loose buttons of his shirt.

‘You just keeping me ‘round ‘cause of that? If I’m so damn warm, maybe I should go and donate all your jackets to FEDRA.’

You press a kiss against the tightened denim of his arched back and smirk.

‘Yeah, well maybe I should start selling you out for some ration cards. Five of them cards for a ten minute hug with Joel sounds like a pretty easy business to me.’

‘As long as I get 50%.’

‘25% and you’ve got yourself a deal.’

In a surprisingly tender move, Joel brings your intertwined hands up and presses an unhurried kiss to the back of your knuckles.

‘Hmph, we’ll negotiate in the morning. Maybe I’ll make it so you’re my only customer, and then I get the best of both worlds. Hugs and ration cards.’

He says the last part with a sarcastic intonation, but even he can’t stop the helplessly hoping sigh that whistles through his teeth. He shuffles back against you and closes his eyes against the creeping crimson threads of sunrise that begin to shoot out from behind the alleyway corners.

‘How about now, we just settle for hugs. I have no doubt you’ll manage to get Robert’s ration cards tomorrow as well.’

‘Back to business, huh? Sure thing boss.’

You manage to get enough momentum to hit his belly with your hands. He pretends to double over, pushing against you a little too hard and nearly thrusting your abdomen backwards and straight out onto the floor. You manage to grab onto his biceps, though, and clamber back up safely against him. He pulls you tighter, using his free hand to draw circles over your forearm. Once you’ve both settled down on the mattress again, you take a final yawn and settle your chin down on his shoulder.

‘Good night Joel.’

He hums. ‘Night, night, sweetheart.’

As consciousness began to ebb, your mind going into free fall, swirling with the beautiful chaos of oblivion, you could just about make out the hoarse whisper of Joel against his pillow. His voice cragged with the effort, with the heaviness of it, with the consequence of it, yet every word managed to ring out true. It was the most genuine, honest sentence Joel Miller had dared to speak since his baby girl had died, and he was petrified by the choice he was making.

But by god, if it was a choice, if it was a chance that he had to take.

‘I love you.’

[thesassypadawan]

Sweater Stretchers *part 2* (Hayden x FemReader)

Summary: Hayden was never really a curves enthusiast until he met you. Especially now that you ‘happy weight’ has found its way to that booty and them boobies…just more for him to love. Hope you lovelies also enjoy Fat Bottom *part 1*!

Warnings: 18+ (mdni), because there sooo much of the smut. Some body worshiping (mostly titties), fun in the kitchen, and, as always…Hayden’s big dick.

- You love wearing your cute, lacey bras…and, well, so does Hayden. But after the whole ‘leggings incident’, you begin to notice that they too were becoming a tad snug.

- It seems your ‘happy weight’ has found its way to the other set of your curves. Again, neither of you is complaining. You both are still loving on your fuller assets. Your poor bras though, much like your old leggings, not so much.

- Pushed nearly to their limit, you know you should probably retire them and get some new ones. Especially before they no longer fit, but where’s the fun in that.

- Secretly you want to be forced to have to ‘freeboob’ it out in public. Just to see Hay’s reaction, what he’ll do when he realizes it.

- So patiently you wait for the day to come. Until one rainy Monday morning…

- You make the discovery when you’re getting dressed to go pick up Hay from the airport. All week you have been struggling to get them on. And today, try as you might, you just can’t manage to get the clasp on your bra to fasten. ‘Oh, well,’ you grin at yourself in the mirror, admiring your new figure. ‘Guess someone is in for a real treat.’

- Having thrown on only a pair of your new leggings and one of his hoodies, which was very much feeling the strain of your ample bust. Like you were pushing its limit pretty good. You wonder how long it will take him to notice.

- But from the glances he keeps not so subtly giving you and your chest on the car ride home. And the way his hand slides higher up on your leg, fingers playing with the hoodie’s hem. It was safe to say that he did…right away.

- Despite his best efforts though, you never let Hayden touch them once. So, needless to say, the minute you two are through that front door… Yeah, he basically tares that hoodie off you.

- A groan escapes him as he leans down to place a soft kiss on your lips. Large hand squeezing one of your breasts. “Thought these sweater stretchers looked bigger. Why didn’t you tell me?”

- You let out a small moan, growing wet from his touch and words. “Wanted to surprise you.”

- “This is one hell of a surprise, angel,” he chuckles. Nuzzling into the side of your neck, gently rolling your sensitive bud between his fingers.

- A pleasant shiver shoots down your spine, arms draping over his shoulders. “Figured you’d like it,” you giggle.

- “I do,” he smirks, giving your other tit a good squish. “And I’m going to fully enjoy myself. Right…now.”

- Without warning he hoists you up, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist. “Hay!” You squeak excitedly, feeling his very hard cock press into your thigh.

- “What? I did say ‘right now’.” Flashing you one of those damn smiles, he smashes his lips against yours. Kissing you passionately. Nipping at you bottom lip, tongue slipping into your mouth. All the while moving back towards the kitchen island.

- You roll your hips against his, earning a hiss from him; before breaking apart. You quickly remove your leggings and panties. Hay stripping down to absolutely nothing just as fast.

- Your walls twitch in anticipation. You can’t help but bite your lip at the sight of him springing forth. So painfully stiff, tip already oozing pre.

- Cupping your ass, giving each cheek an appreciative squeeze. He pulls you to the edge. Slotting himself between your legs, massive cock rubbing against your stomach. “Like what you see?”

- “Always,” you coo. Wiggling just enough to make your breasts jiggle a bit. “How about you?”

- “What do you think?” He mutters huskily, lips trailing over your neck and down to one of your breasts. Nipping at your tender flesh, his tip running through you wet folds.

- Your hands come to rest on the back of his head and neck. A needy mewl falling from your lips as you feel him line up with your entrance. “Haaayden.”

- “Fucking love these fat tits,” he growls. Sinking his teeth into your other plushy globe and snapping his hips forward.

- Crying out, your back arches. Chest pressing further in his face while he stretches you out so deliciously.

- Guiding your hips, he begins to pound into you. Greedily nibbling and biting, covering your chest with love bites. “So plump. So juicy. So perfect.”

- Speeding up, he grips your butt harder. Thrusts grow stronger, your body bouncing with every movement. All you can do is hold on, walls fluttering from his words. While he teases your nipple with his nose and tongue.

- A mix of a moan and a scream fly from your mouth as he hungerly stuffs most of a boob into his mouth. Suckling harshly, licking at what he couldn’t manage to fit.

- “Hay… Hay…” You whimper, orgasm rapidly approaching. Your body trembling against his, his hips slapping against yours. The pleasure building up inside of you becomes unbearable.

- Releasing your tit with a wet sounding pop; he grins up at you, eyes blown wide with lust. “So tasty, angel…can’t wait for them to fill with milk someday.”

- He bites down on your other pert nub hard, sending you spiraling. You throw your head back in a silent cry. Clamping down on him, gushing all over his cock.

- Burying himself to the hilt, he lets out a deep groan. Pumping you so deliciously with his hot cum.

- With his head still resting on your pillows, you run your fingers through his hair. You want to ask him about what was said in the heat of the moment, but decide not to…at least for now. “You’re really okay with all my new curves?”

- “Absolutely,” Hayden growls, grinding into you to prove his point. “More for me to love and…I look forward to when they’ll fill out even more.”

[izanazqueen]

bonten manjiro x fem reader

warnings: smut. cursing. physical stuff. finishing inside. fluff. angst. timeskip - bonten mikey.

an: after finally forever i am finished w the bonten mikey fic that was request from way back and now it is here in existence - hope you enjoy / are pleased with it love! 💙

~

bonten mikey never took it easy on your body. especially after not seeing you. tonight was possibly the worst of all. after accidentally and absent-minded you forgot to turn on your ringtone when he tried calling you suddenly after one of his bonten discussions to check in on you. bad mistake. he had busted through your front entrance with beyond intense rage when you flew out the shower -quickly covering yourself with a white linen fast when you darted through the door to see him standing in front of you in what almost resembled madman. ' manjiro- w ..wha - ' he cut you off instantly with his sweaty rough palm against your trembling face in fear unknowing of what would happen. 'what.. the fck !.. - is wrong with you?! ' he screamed as he slammed his free hand balled furiously against the wall adjacent to your body making you boil in panic. 'manjiro. please. calm down, it is ok .. - ' speaking quitely to him you tried to attempt to cradle his shaking cheeks in your hands. you knew what this was. he was scared. manjiro acted usually so calm and composed but there were few moments when you witnessed his complete and total breakdowns - his times where he just let out everything and let the anxiety win strongly against his full will. you knew damn well he was in a panic over you and couldn't be angry for his actions in that moment even if would mean having to plaster the wall the next morning. 'babe- its alright. i'm here.. i did not mean - to not to answer your calls ..i just was in the shower- nn ! -' before you knew it he was kissing your lips with love filled hypnotic passion. you were here. nothing could go wrong - not with him around. he hated leaving you sometimes even for multiple days on end when he'd have to leave the country for bonten work and other such things and the thought alone sickened his stomach. sure - he always had sanzu always posted outside your apt whenever he was out if town, much to his pink haired partners dismay- there was never a moment that he wasn't thinking about what could be going wrong whenever he stepped foot away from your presence and -at least in this moment .. right now there was not a damn thing that could take him away - from being with you -

~~

manjiro fucking your body like like he's possessed. i mean - he is insane. he forced your hands back pinning them above your head obviously avoiding your whines and whimpers for him and pushing himself in your wet cunt before any words could form in your mind he went feral when heard you moaning from him ' unh .. babee-! 'making his way much further inside you than he should be doing making you cry out his name loudly. ' fck- me manjiro - ah! .' nothing would hold this man from bringing the devil out when he was forcing his cock over and over again until the warmth of that place he needed took over and stole him from reality. it was an abyss one you only could deliver him into - manjiro wanted it all. making you only his was the best decision he could have had ever made in his life. grabbing onto your waist he placed his mouth over your neck biting down almost as if he was in need of your sweet nectare pushing himself further into his abyss making you cum so dmn fast you swore it was the first time. ' - babe! - ah ! ' swelling around him your vagina drenched his belly and was dripping all down your own legs from whatever magic he was working your pussy into and you pleaded with him so hard not to stop - 'babyy ..! ah! .. manjiro! - ' mikey cut you off with his tender lips in a sharp embrace to your moaning mouth. 'nnngh .. unh-nghh ..' you heard him groan wildly as he began fucking you harder and harder sighing into you with his sexy voice - all the way pressed in your hair from how close he was about to orgasm and the motions rocking the bed of how he was pleasuring himself with you with such force and strength from his biceps and toned build so chaoticly when you felt yourself starting to cum all over again before the feeling of the wood snapping beneath you giving out completely with the mattress folded in half against the floor as he went on relentlessly aggressively pounding his hard cock in you in a murderous fixation, thrashing your throbbing cumming core with such fine work you did not give no cares .. at all. 'manjiro- .. ah!- fck .. yess! - ' your voice sounded so beautiful and pleasing to him and he could not stand to pull himself out when in some dream like state he gave out to your serene voice against him like a melody to his body. the sweat from your panting chest against his skin mixing into his felt like a drug and he grabbed your chin into a hungry lip lock- manjiro needed you. every last part of you. your body. your lips. your voice. your smile. your comfort. your embrace. you were his life - the perfect person for him that he could have imagined in a partner and to his surpise you offered it happily he had thought to a piece of shit like him - without question. he had to do better for you. for your future. and maybe even his own.

@izanazqueen © -all rights reserved.

please do not copy / repost my work

[whorediaries-09]

Heyyy I don't know if your requests are still open but I have really missed your writing, imo you are one of the best fanfic writers out there<333

Anyways if your requests are still open I desperately need a rockstar!sirius x reader smutty prompt. Maybe after a show drinking in a pub with friends or sth and not being able to hold themselves and going outside of the pub. Whatever inspires you really, I trust your writing. I've been really feeling the british alt rock, grunge vibe lately. As for the fic, no particular kink preference just no daddy kink pls.

It's okay if you don't feel like it. I hope you are doing great

hi love, thank you so much for your kind words. just for future preference, my requests are open most of the time unless i have written the contrary on my pinned post :)

i hope you like what i've written, and i'm sorry i took so long to get around it, i've had a few tough days.

also i'm the biggest hater of daddy kink.

do i wanna know?

pairing- rockstar!sirius black x reader warning(s)- 18+ content. (let me know if i should add more) a/n- lawd have mercy i'm bout to bust 🧎‍♂️

the slut club

cause there's this tune i found, that makes me think of you somehow an' i play it on repeat,

you're not sure how you end up here. from making eye contact with sirius black on stage, to being pushed up against the wall of an unknown alley, his tongue shoved down your throat. his lips taste like an addiction that craves for you. it's like it's chasing for you and solemnly be yours. his knee crawls between the flesh of your thighs, his lips travelling south to your neck.

'you taste so fucking good,' he hums against the hot skin of your neck. you leave a breathless moan. his hand slides under your top, the metal of his rings cold against your hot skin. your hips rut against his jeans, as you search for friction on your clit.

'i want to fuck you so badly.' he murmurs. you feel your wetness seeping through your underwear. even though he's pressed against your body, it's like he can't get close enough to you.

'please do,' you whisper, your finger curling into his silky raven locks. his fingers work on the button of your skirt, while yours work on his.

'i fucking will, i promise you.'

you free his cock, and your eyes widen at his size. it was no hushed rumor the man was walking sex, and everyone who got into the bed with him would like the way he grinds. anyone would bet he could make people scream raw all night if he wanted to.

he smirks, noticing your expression. his finger circles around your sensitive clit, and you line his cock against your wet folds.

'gonna fuck your pretty pussy so good,' he says, thrusting his hips, as you wrap your legs around his waist. you hum, brushing your lips with his,

'i wouldn't put my money on it, player,' you tease. he laughs, his finger circling your clit. he raises his eyebrow, as if questioning you. he pushes your back against the concrete, and you feel the roughness scratching your back.

your mouth slacks open once he picks up his pace. he's got the perfect rhythm, you think. your eyes widen, your toes curling against the soles of your boots when his breathe fans over your skin. you slap a palm over your mouth to prevent being caught in such a promiscuous place, your legs spread open while his cock rutted into you. he moves your palm from your mouth,

'nuh uh, i want to hear your pretty sounds,' he groans. your walls flutter around his cock, your stomach rumbling with ecstasy. it was a fantasy, like playing with fire. it was loving his touch, not his feeling.

'come on, player, i know you do better than that,' you whisper, biting on his earlobe. he looks at you, his gray eyes suddenly devoid of the playfulness but full of a darkness that consumes your lust. his pupils dilate and under the moonlight, you think it makes him look like a beast of prey. tonight, you were his prey.

'oh yeah? i'm sure.' he says, increasing his pace. his fingers dig into your waist, and when the tip of his cock hits your sweet spot, you scream. he laughs, his hand landing on your cheek. he grabs your face, his tongue rolling over your squished lips,

'like it honey?'

you're too breathless to answer his question against the force with which he rams into you. you feel your thighs shake, the coil of your orgasm bubbling inside you. fresh tears roll down your mascara stained cheeks. your walls flutter around his cock, eyes roll to the back of your head when you let go, your orgasm rippling through you with every inch of your body.

sirius bites your shoulder, fucking into you, chasing for his own release. you kiss him fervently, while he empties himself inside you, his hot seed spilling into you. your thighs shake with the intensity of your orgasm and his cum painting your guts.

a bright flashlight almost blinds you. it's followed by a click of a camera. he smiles, turning his phone to show you the picture he took. you're exhausted, with clampy mascara stuck on your eyelashes. your cheeks are stained with makeup and sweat, yet you look satisfied.

'i'll make this the cover for my next album,' he grins.

[sensei-venus]

(Unedited) (Weed Mentioned, Drug Use, Robby Is High, High Head, Bimbo!Reader) ( @gemini-sensei )

Imagine Robby getting completely dusted, high as a kite with the boys. Suddenly he's remembering his cute little bimbo girlfriend. She's such a little cutie. All of a sudden she's all he can think about. Her cute little face with her round cheeks and full lips, fat tits, and fluffy belly with rolls and hips for days. Even a nice ass that she lets him grab whenever he wants, thick thighs can't get his mind off.

He decides to blow off the guys and head back to his place but not before texting Reader. He asks her if she wants to come over for some fun since he has the place all to himself. Shannon has been gone for who knows how long and it's just been him hanging around the apartment. His phone chirps in his hands as a quick “See you there babe~💕” is sent back. He smirks while stuffing the phone into his pocket and heading back to his place.

Cut to him slamming his chubby girlfriend up against the door of the apartment. His hands fumble for his keys. Moments later they are busting through the doorway. They're making out so hard that Robby has to keep a hand on Reader’s jaw. Fingers dug into the soft flesh of her jaw and cheeks. He's groaning and grunting into her mouth the whole time. His tongue swirls against the inside of her cheeks, playing with her tongue. It's wet and nasty which has Reader curling her toes.

Before he can do anything Reader is already pulling off his lips and kissing down to his pants. She slowly starts pulling down his pants while giggling. She looks up at him through her lashes. Pulling his boxers down she lets his cock spring out. He's already hard and twitching as she starts to jerk him, pumping his fat dick in her hand. His eyes roll at the feeling of her soft hand against his sensitive cock. She smiles while placing gentle kisses up his shaft until she meets the fat head. She swirls her tongue around the leaking tip, lapping at it as pre spills out. It's both sweet and salty.

The taste alone has her head spinning.

She wants more of it.

She can't say anything as Robby grips at the back of her head with a strong hand. Her eyes roll back and her brows knot together as he takes him into her mouth. She gags on the thickness as he quickly feeds his dick into her mouth. Soon enough its pushing into her tight throat. She moans as he starts to use her mouth for his own pleasure.

He's grunting, banging the back of his head against the wall behind him. His eyes are squeezed shut as he tries to stay focused on his girlfriend's hard work. Feeling her hot mouth and spit sliding down his dick. It coats his balls in a warm layer for drool. Her hands are tearing at his thighs, nails digging into the skin. Gritting his teeth as his hips start to buck.

He grunts out “Yeah just like that- take that shit. You like it don't you? When I got my whole dick down your throat. Such a cock slut just for me huh?” he thrusts harder into her mouth. Her moan vibrates through his dick making him cry out. He grips the back of her head harder. He used her face to his own liking.

At this point, all he wants to do is blow his load down her throat.

And he does just minutes later while gripping her hair. He gags her one more time before stilling and cumming in her mouth. He can feel the way her throat tightens around him with every new rope of cum. It's hot and thick as it spills down her throat. It coats her tongue along with her fat cheeks. Her eyes are teary as fat warm tears spill down her hot face. Tears trail down her chubby cheeks as she stares up at him.

He pants as he pulls out of her mouth, her lips swollen and puffy. A mix of spit and cum coats and drips from them. It's a white clear mess all over.

“There you go, that's all you need isn't it? Just a nice fat load of my cum in that belly of yours huh?” he taps the messy head of his dick over her lips. He whimpers and nods.

She's such a good girl for him.

[fawndlyvenus]

I am looking at @emberfaye @the-cookie-of-doom ,and @snickerdoodlles specifically for this one. (Look at what you three have done!… thank you.)

Kim wanted to collapse after his day. Filming for a music video three days in a row was not fun. He didn’t want to see another makeup artist for the next week. And he felt like he’d bust a camera into little bitty pieces if one appeared right now.

He stripped almost immediately after entering the apartment him and Chay shared, and scrubbed layer after layer of makeup from his skin, as well as whatever they had put in his hair to set it this time. Once he was feeling somewhat normal again, Kim pulled one of Chay’s t-shirts from the closet on over his head, and breathed deep.

The scent of Chay was magic at making him feel more relaxed – and until Chay came back from classes, this would have to do. Slipping on some old sweatpants, Kim returned back to the bathroom to scrub his mouth clean of the dry, icky feeling of the day.

As he was preparing his toothbrush, he saw it – his bare neck. His agitation and grumpy mood now doubled. Chay hadn’t left a single mark in days because of this shoot. Not a single hicky or bite mark colored his neck, and it honestly made Kim feel off.

Wearing Chay’s marks was grounding. It was something that made him feel special and wanted. To know that he was so loved and important to someone, and that they wanted him to know it every time he looked in the mirror. It made Kim feel something curl up warm and tight in his chest seeing exactly where Chay’s mouth had laid claim to him.

And now he felt cold and bare looking at his perfectly flawless neck.

Kim brushed his teeth at lightning speed, before padding back out and curling up on the sofa in the living room. Kim tried not to think about it. His leg bounced as his feelings intensified, and no amount of tv or doom scrolling on social media could stop it.

Kim was a dog with a bone. A very Chay-shaped bone, and he wasn’t going to let it go for anything. Checking his phone, Kim saw that Chay still had about an hour left before he’d be back.

Kim could do this. He could last an hour.

Kim moved into the kitchen, threw himself into cooking a meal, but his mind immediately went back to Chay.

Had Chay ate? What would he want to eat for dinner? How hungry would he be? Too hungry to mark his-

Nope! Kim left the half-cut vegetables sitting on the cutting board, and moved back to the sofa to stop his thoughts. He picked up his guitar and began to idly strum some chords. His fingers moved, but his mind stayed exactly where it had been – pacing an ever growing worn spot on his mental carpet.

Chay would think he was needy for wanting him to mark him first thing when he got home. Was he needy? No, he just liked his boyfriend’s mouth on him. That was totally normal and not needy of boyfriends, right? Wanting his skin littered with proof that Chay wanted him, as much as he wanted Chay, was absolutely normal and not needy.

Kim – lost in his thoughts – almost missed the sound of the locks on the front door disengaging and opening. Almost. Bolting up, Kim half ran to the entrance and felt his body react accordingly to seeing that familiar mop of black hair, and large doe-like eyes.

“P’Kim! Your back-oof!” Chay’s words were cut short as Kim crowded him against the wall. Kim crashed their lips together, and felt the all-too-familiar zing of electricity shoot down his spine as he did. Kim felt the way Chay’s body vibrated under him as a series of giggles slipped past their moving lips.

Pulling away, Chay finally let out the last bit of his laughter. “I think you missed me,” Chay teased.

Only a lot. Kim’s brain supplied for him before he could shoot it down. Kim moved to resume their previous make-out session, but was stopped by Chay tugging at the back of Kim’s hair. Kim let out a small hiss – not because it hurt, but because it sent a whole new wave of pleasure through him.

Chay’s eyes had darkened, and he looked somehow sinful, yet adorable, as he cocked his head to the side to look at Kim. Tugging gently at the hair still trapped between his fingers, Chay scanned Kim’s face, looking for something.

“What is it you want, love?” Chay’s words sent another zing down his spine, but also a lick of something bitter with it. Why did he have to say it? Why couldn’t Chay just know what Kim wanted and do it? He probably did know, but Chay wanted Kim to tell him, but Kim didn’t know how.

He couldn’t just say “mark me till I know I’m yours without question,” because that was definitely needy. But he also knew Chay would like that. Chay would definitely, positively like that.

Kim felt a few more tugs on his hair, as Chay waited for him to find the words, which were proving difficult to get out. Swallowing a worrying amount, Kim finally found his voice, “Mark me. Mark me till I know I’m yours.”

“Good boy,” was the last thing Kim heard Chay say, before he felt the warm and wet suction of Chay’s mouth on his neck. Kim was in heaven as Chay sucked and bit at his neck. He didn’t care about the sounds he was making or the fact he was basically clawing the wall behind Chay.

It felt glorious to finally have the thing that he most wanted and the knowledge that after Chay was done with him, he’d have the most beautiful necklace of proof that Chay loved him, and that he was Chay’s. And that was exactly what he always wanted. Forever.

[cheynovak]

Light in the darkness part 1

Reader x Billy Butcher 

Warnings:  Age difference (not explicit told), cursing, abuse, smut, 16+, ...  It's Billy Butcher what not to warn about..

Side note: English isn’t my first language.  

Words: 3894

Part 2 now online

Y/N is the owner of a blues bar in New York, she is used to all kinds of customers even the ones with a secret you don’t want to know. One day the boys and Billy Butcher walk in. The connection between Billy and Y/N is undeniable, but the recent divorce from her aggressive and dominant husband for Y/N and Becca’s dead still lingering in Billy’s mind makes it hard for them to admit their feelings.  

Cursives are from Buchter’s point of view.  

----------------------- 

It was a quiet night at the bar, Y/N was thinking of closing for the night when 4 men walked in looking in a rough shape. The tall one looked around before noticing you leaning on the bar “Gentlemen, why don’t you try and find yourself a table.” You joked welcoming them.  

The 4 fellas took the table behind the counter, close for you but out of side for anyone who might walk in.  

“What can I get you?” Y/N asked while looking at them one by one. They stayed quiet for a second. She looked at the tall skinny guy, who looked just old enough to be in her bar, considering to ask his ID, she noticed his lip was busted. While the other man who had dark hair and a beard looked Y/N up and down. “Scotch.” He said raising his bleeding eyebrow. “All four?” They nodded. When Y/N came back she brought the drinks and an extra glass with ice and tissues. “It looks like you all could use it.”  She said looking at the one who seemed to do all the talking. “Thanks darlin” he answered with a thick accent, looking in your eyes. Y/N quickly looked him up and down before meeting his eyes again, ‘If there is anything else I can get you, give me a sign.” When he kept staring at her, the corner of her lip curled into a soft smile before she turned around.  

-- 

The boys decided to go for a victory drink at pub they saw passing on their way home. When Billy walked in, he noticed the place was empty part from the young woman who was leaning over the bar looking at her phone, she welcomed them. Before she walked over to their table, she turned down the music slightly. Billy couldn’t help but staring at the bartender, the softness of her eyes told him she was young, innocent, but something made him see the pain and struggle she had been through. He looked her up and down, she was just wearing a black jeans and a low V cut band t-shirt tugged in her pants, he liked that it was showing of her curves. Before she walked back at her bar she smiled slightly, giving him a warm feeling.  

-- 

Y/N could hear the men talking but didn’t listen to a word they were saying, that was one thing she learned as a bar owner, unless they talk to you, none of their conversations are your business. Specially not in a rougher neighbourhood here in New York. But of course, every now and then you pick up some details of a story, as long as they paid the bill, you smiled and pretend not to know a thing.  

You hear the door opening, Steve your ex-husband walked in, seemingly drunk. “What are you doing here?” He didn’t answer you but took a seat at the bar. You could see his bloodshot eyes looking at you, roaming his eyes over your cleavage. “Showing them off now, are we?”. Y/N tried to stay calm but feeling the goosebumps on her back, “Steve, what are you doing here?” - “What, I can’t pick up my wife from work?” “I’m not your wife anymore.” Y/N said looking over at the table, the 4 men were looking now at the two of you. “If you had shown up at court today you would have known that.” Y/N said still peacefully while moving on with drying a glass.  

Steve got up ripped the glass from your hands and threw it behind you at the wall. Y/N froze not knowing how to react to this even though she was used to his aggression by now. “Oi, is there a problem here?” The guy said walking slowly to Steve. “Mind your own business.” Steve said. “It is my business isn’t it, me and my lads are trying to enjoy a nice evening and you, cunt, are ruining it. I suggest you get your shit together leave this lady alone, now get the fuck out here before I bust ya teeth ey.” Steve looked at the man and looked at the guys behind him who now all stood up from their chairs. He nodded slightly, looked one more time at Y/N “We’re not done yet.” He said pointing a finger at her before leaving through the door.  

-- 

Billy noticed the girl was still clenched up when the man left. “You ok luv?” He asked while she moved her hand over her face. “Yeah, yes thank you. But I would like to close up for tonight, if you guys don’t mind?” He saw her eyes tear up, trying to fight it. “How much do I own you?” He asked grabbing for his wallet. “Nothing” Bily looked at her. “It’s on the house, for helping me.” she clarified. “Do you live close?” The youngest guy asked nervous. “I mean, I don’t like for you to walk around alone. You never know... You know.” - “My car is parked a few blocks away.”  

--  

“Right, MM you bring the boys home.” Y/N hears him saying while he tossed his keys to the quiet man. “I’ll walk you to your car.” He looked at you. Y/N knew this was probably as dangerous as walking alone but somehow, she felt save around him. So, Y/N nodded. “I still need to close up, I’ll be ready in 5.” He grabbed his coat “I’ll wait outside.”  

Y/N turned off the music and lights, took a deep breath before walking through the door. The man did indeed wait for you, leaning against the wall.  

The yellow light from the lamppost gave an extra touch to his rough shape, she had no idea if it was the adrenaline from earlier or his intriguing eyes that kept staring in hers that made her gasp for air, but somehow, he took her breath away. “Before we go.” She took a step close. “What is your name?”  

“Billy, Billy Butcher.” “Nice to meet you, Billy.” She shakes his hand like nothing happened earlier. “Y/N, Y/L/N. At least now I won’t walk around with a complete stranger.” She joked. He let out a chuckle. They walked a few minutes in silence. “Do I look that scary to you luv?” He asked without looking at her. “I’m still trying to figure out if you are a serial killer or a 90s porn star.” He stopped walking, turning to her, for a second Y/N regretted the choice of words. “Well, you’re bloody honest aren’t you.” He burst into laughter. “What makes you think I'm a killer?” Y/N answered by pointing at his wounds. “Ok, I get that, porn star?” She chuckled before answering. “The shirt.” Few words had been said, but the silence didn’t feel uncomfortable.  

“Well, this is my car.” She said leaning against the driver's door. “Great, well, Y/N have a great night.” - “You need a ride home?” Y/N asked when he turned his back to walk away. “Won’t say no to that.” He smirked. Part from billy’s directions to his apartment they didn’t say much. She parked in front of it but before he jumped out the car, he looked once more at her giving her a half smile as token of gratitude. “Hey Billy?” She looked at him through the window as he leans into it. “Thanks again, for Steve and... You know not killing me.” “You’re welcome sweetheart. I hope to see you around sometime ey.” “You know where to find me.”  

Y/N dropped her purse on the kitchen table, she walked lifeless to her bathroom, while she removed her pants and bra, removed her make up, ready to go to bed. She was tired but couldn’t stop thinking about tonight. Even though her world had been upside down for the last couple of months with the divorce she felt a strange but nice feeling with Billy. There was this constant feeling of wanting to be close to him, she liked that he checked her out without shame, looking at every curve, every inch. A lot of customers did, but with him she felt safe. Probably just the fact that he stood up for her right? She felt threatened and he helped, that would be the reason. She tried to convince herself.  

A few days gone by Y/N hasn’t seen Steve in a while, but Billy dropped by almost every night. Sitting at her bar, talking about Steve and his wife. He didn’t say much but she could see the hurt in his eyes, that he really loved her and that he became a totally different man after her death.  

 

But tonight, when she wanted to open her bar someone had broken in and smashed the entire place to pieces.  

By the time Y/N wanted to let the police out the door Billy walked in. “What happened here?” He asked her while looking at the cops. “Steve trashed the place.” Y/N answered. “Well, we don’t know who did it yet.” The police reacted to her allegations. “Who else would have done this!?” She yelled “That Steve is an asshole, I’ve seen it with my own eyes. He smashed a few glasses when drunk, a few days back. Threatened her.” Butcher tried to defend Y/N’s reaction, but the cops walked out without much to go on by. Butcher looked around, the entire bar was broken down, furniture burned, glass mashed, even graffiti on the walls.  

“Are you ok luv?” He asked her, holding his hand on her upper back, between her shoulders, without hesitation she let her head fall on his shoulder holding on to his jacket, crying. “I can’t believe this, every last penny I put into this place.” She said softly, her voice sounded muffed in his clothing.  

-- 

Billy felt her head fall on to his shoulder, his immediate reaction was to hold her closer, caressing her back. He felt like kissing her head but managed to hold back just in time. “It’s ok, we will figure something out.” He said instead. That seemed to shock Y/N out of her bubble. “Oh god, I’m so sorry Billy.” She took a few steps back, drying her tears. “I didn’t mean to... You don’t have to help me. You already did so much.”  The second she moved her head away he could feel the warmth of her body against his leave. “I’m not gonna leave you hanging.” He answered walking over to her pulling her back in his arms for a hug.  

Over the course of the last few days Billy spend time with Y/N trying to help her with the new interieur choices, he absolute hated it, interieur was always Becca’s thing, but he would do anything to be close to Y/N. He felt like a completely different man around her, more at peace. He forgot about supes, he drank less, he even smiled at her silly jokes. Her optimism was like a light in his darkness.  

 

-- 

 

Billy agreed to go shopping together trying to find new furniture and paint. Y/N was surprised he agreed to it, he didn’t seem like the shopping type. But being around him made her feel good. He wasn’t the chattiest, happy, open person, but he was honest, or at least that was the vibe she got from him. Billy offered to take the shopping cart while Y/N picket out a few decorations before walking over to the paint aisle. "What do you think?” Y/N asked as she was holding two different lights up. “Left one” he said noticing an older couple smiling and looking over.  

Y/N placed the right on in de cart. Butcher gave Y/N a grumpy look. “I thought you wanted my opinion.” - “Yeah, I do, because I know that your choices aren’t always the most... fashionable.” She said standing next to him, pulling slightly at the pocket of his Hawaiian shirt while she smiled her well practised cute smile, standing very close to him, she could see the amusement in his eyes. Before walking on to the next aisle.  

-- 

“Get used to it, women, they do that to us.” The old man said to Billy. “I’m sorry?” he responded. “We’ve been married 35 years, I never got to pick any furniture. She made the decision for me... But she made that house, our home. I’m sure your girl will do the same.” He laughs, his old lady picked up on the conversation. “You two seem like a cute couple, I can see you have at least good taste in women.” She smiles. Billy wanted to correct them saying they were just friends. But something kept him. He smiled and walked his was towards Y/N. “Where were you?” She asked happy. “Well, I think I have everything I need.” - “Great, about fucking time.” She smacked his arm. “You loved it.”  

“You need a hand with painting?” Billy asked when he dropped everything off at the bar, helping her spreading out the plastic on the floor and over the remains of the furniture. “Well, I wanted to start now, but I don’t want to waste anymore of your time.” - “Bullshit.” He dropped his jacket behind the bar, pouring himself a drink. “It will be an all nighter then?” he grinned lifting his brows. Y/N walked towards to bar taking his glass. “Well, I can think of worse ways to spend the night with way worse company.” She winked taking a sip walking around the bar.  

Billy felt his face getting hot after that comment. But when she walked over to him behind the bar his heart started to beat so fast, he was scared she would be able to hear it. He stood still afraid his actions would show his emotions. Billy felt Y/N’s hand on his shoulder, he looked over to see her walk passed him towards the stereo. “I’m glad this old piece of junk still works.” She said with her back towards Billy, swaying a little at the song.  

He couldn’t help himself, he placed his hands on her shoulders turning her around to face him, his eyes roaming her face. He closed his eyes, moving closer to her, but right before he wanted to kiss her, he couldn’t help but think of Becca. So, he stopped himself, touching her forehead with his and whispered, “Maybe we need to get started.”  

--  

Y/N felt his strong hands leave her skin, she almost wanted to whimper when he took a step back.  

She could have sworn he wanted this as much as she did, she saw it in his eyes. He looked like a man possessed with her, the hunger in his eyes the way he licked his lips. All of that changed within a second, his eyes turned cold and so did his posture.  

Each of them started to paint on another corner of the room. Y/N could feel the awkwardness throughout the room. She kept looking over at Billy, but he kept his eyes on the wall, his expression looking like a teenager who was punished.  

“Billy, you don’t have to do this, if you... I don’t know, want to go home you can leave.”  She said turning towards him, throwing her brush in the bucked. “You want me to leave?” He said not looking at her. “That’s not what I said, I ...” She sights “I just don’t what it to be awkward between us.” He stopped painting but still wasn’t looking at her, so she continued. “Listen, I like you being here, I know we only met a few weeks ago but... I’ve had a rough couple of months and being with you, even when things are shitty, being with you makes me happy.”  

She took a few steps towards him. “And I know that you at least feel... something when you are with me.”  

-- 

Her words made him look up at her. She was right, he liked being with her, she was the opposite of his live, the peace he needs, the light he missed in the dark.  

 

“I can’t drag you into my mess.” He said laying down the brush.  

“You won’t.” She answered. 

“My job, my life it’s, so fucked up.”  

“So, is mine.” she said soft.  

“I don’t want you to get hurt.” he walked over to her, slowly.  

“That won’t happen.” 

“I’m horrible at sharing my feelings. I have secrets I can never tell you and I have trust issues.” he said standing in front of her, holding one hand on her neck.  

“I don’t care.”  

He thought for a second. “I can’t cook.”  

She laughs soft laying he head in his hand. “Oh no, so horrible.”  

He felt her hands on his chest, he looked at them before he looked back at her lips. Closing the space between them. Kissing her soft lips, tasting her was better than he had imagined.  

--  

His large hands cupped her neck and cheek while he lowered his lips. Y/N felt his lips touch hers, she would have thought he felt rougher, but they were surprisingly soft. She felt a spark starting at their joined lips traveling all over her body, her hands moved up to his shoulders, pulling him closer. Billy’s tongue touched her bottom lip, asking for permission which she gladly granted him. The kiss quickly heated, both of them starting to breath heavier, moving their hands over each other's body.  

Billy walked Y/N backwards, but she tripped over the carpet that was covered in plastic and fell on to the floor, Billy couldn’t hold her in time and fell beside her on his knees with one hand beside Y/N’s head. “Oh my god... how romantic.” She couldn’t contain her laugh saying that.  

Billy was still focussed on her. He moved a small piece of hair out of her face and kissed her again, hovering over her. She felt his hand moving lower over her side holding her, pulling himself closer. He quickly made sure their breaths were deep and full of lust again. She could feel the weight of his body on top of her. And when his lips moved to her neck, she couldn’t hold back the soft moan.  

His hand moved under her shirt feeling his callused fingers over her stomach, between her breasts back to her neck, before she could lift herself so that he could take them off. That same hand moved to one of her breasts, holding it over her bra. While his mouth was kissing and licking her neck. She could feel his breathing in her ear. “I want you.” he whispered so soft Y/N feared she misunderstood him. “Say that again.” she asked while her nails found their way to his back.  

Billy lifted himself enough to look in her eyes. “I want you.” He repeated. Y/N pulled him in for a kiss. “Then take me.... I want you too.” she said between kisses.  

Those words seemed to be the only thing that held you two back, Y/N helped Billy out of his shirt and opened his belt, as he took the rest off of his body, he then ripped your pants and panties down your legs while you unbuckled your bra. Billy Hovering back over you, almost covering your naked body, you could feel his hands move in between your thighs to where you wanted to feel him the most. Y/n’s back arched when his fingers found her wet folds, spreading them, while moving his finger up and down to her clit. “Fuck sweetheart, so wet already ey.” he hummed in her ear. Y/N wanted to answer but his finger entering her made her gasp for breath clinging to his shoulders.  

Y/N felt his beard scratching her softly while he moved his lips towards her breast, licking her hardened nipple. Her hand flew to the back of his head, moaning his name. “Tell me luv, how long has it been?”... “How long ago when someone made you feel good, worshipped that wet cunt of yours?” He added a second finger curling into that spot rubbing his palm against her clit. By the way his hand and lips moved she knew Billy wouldn’t want to make love to her, he wanted to fuck her. She felt that the lust he was building drove him wild and so did she. She could feel the fire in her stomach building. “Billy... don’t stop... Please.” She begged him. She could see the satisfaction in his smirk. “Do it, I want to feel you come on my finger before I fuck you so hard you won’t be able stand.” That was all she needed to hear.  

--  

Billy pushed her over the edge, but before she could take a breath, he already thrusted his cock in her without a warning. He felt her clench around him, he kissed her soft. “Relax luv.” He said looking at her face. “Just wait sec, ok? I’m not used to... your size.” She said out of breath, kissing him back. Those words made him twitch inside her. He pulled back slightly before thrusting in her. He heard her hiss soft. “I’ll go slow.” he said looking at her. She smiled “No you won’t.” biting his collar bone softly.  

-- 

She heard Billy grown, holding her shoulders, his thrusts became rougher every time he pulled back and slammed back in until he found a rough and steady pace. Y/N’s moans turned into prayers singing his name, she noticed how he loved her nails scratching his back, pulling his hair while her teeth bit his neck and shoulder. The noises he made, made her even wetter. She wrapped her knees around his hips. “Oh Billy... harder. Don’t... hold back.” - “Say that again.” - “Harder... Fuck me harder.” Y/N could feel her second orgasm building. Her nails dug deep into his skin when the rush of her orgasm moved over her body. Billy pulled out short after, holding his cock while his head fell on her breast breathing hard. She could feel his warm seed dripping on her thigh and abdomen.  

“Sorry for the mess.” He said kissing her shoulder before getting up to find a towel. “I just didn’t know if you wanted me to...” - “Oh no, good thinking.” she said.  

They both got dressed. “So, what now?” she asked him while watching him closing the buttons of his shirt. “Here let me.” He looked at her, cupping her face again kissing her passionately. “All I know is that I want more of this, more of you. And I don’t mean just sex.”  

“Take it slow?” she said laughing slightly.  

“You know we won’t.” he grinned.  

-------------

If you liked this, please check out my masterlist for other stories

[munsonsreputation]

21 (already under)

eddie munson x fem!reader

word count: [3.2K]

warnings: warnings: no use of y/n, lovers to strangers, mentions of underage drinking, crying (mentions of breakup), isolation, brief talk of anxiety, cursing, angst...ambiguous ending (maybe part 2)

summary: it's eddie's 21st birthday and though you two have been broken up for 2 years, you can't help but wonder if you should call him up and wish him a happy birthday. but to your surprise, it seems he has already beaten you to it.

Pacing back and forth in the living room of your apartment isn’t ideally how you imagined to be spending your Saturday night, but in hindsight, these days you practically spent the entire day confined to the four walls.

Your days used to be filled with stops at the trailer park to visit your favorite metal head and nights spent at the Hideout being his biggest fan in the crowd. But all of that, including him was now gone in the rearview for quite some time.

So much time had passed, but at the same time it felt like it was just yesterday where you and him went your separate ways, living two completely different lives in the same small town where you did your best to avoid each other.

But how could you avoid him without running into his friends or stumbling into Uncle Wayne at the grocery store from time to time?

All of it was just fucking impossible, and a huge chunk of you wanted to pack your things up and move away, but you knew his ghost would follow you everywhere no matter where you were in the world.

Even tonight, in the confines of your apartment, you couldn’t avoid him.

It was his twenty-first birthday today. The big 2-1 that marked the age where he could finally drink legally without facing any repercussions from Hopper. A coming of age that was supposed to be celebrated with you next to him at the Hideout.

You two had planned it out years ago when you were just seniors hanging out at Lover’s Lake with your hands intertwined and the sun setting down on the both of you.

“Hopper is gonna lose his shit if you get busted for underage drinking again.” You chided quietly, feeling him pull one of his hands away from your waist to reach over and grab an ice cold beer from the small cooler he packed.

He rolled his eyes playfully, taking a swig of the bitter before holding it out for you.

“He did the same thing when he was our age…maybe even a little worse! He’s got to cut me some slack.”

“In three years, you’ll be 21, then that’s when he’ll cut you some.”

Eddie scoffed, slinging his arm across your shoulders, tugging you close to him as you squealed, trying not to spill the beer all over the both of you. Resting your head on his shoulder, you got comfortable, taking a sip of the drink that was definitely not your choice of beverage on a scorching afternoon, but it would make do for now.

“My 21st is gonna be at the Hideout, obviously.” He said, rubbing his hand up and down the expanse of your arm.

You looked at up him through your lashes, blinking kindly, “Yeah? I just know the groupies are going to have a field day with you.”

He met your eyes followed by a dramatic huff as he shook his head and squeezed your skin lightly, almost in a soft, scolding way.

“Stop that. You know you’re my favorite fan…my one and only groupie.”

You scrunched your face up at him lovingly, puckering your lips and silently asking him to grant you with one of his famous kisses that you would never get tired of — even if it was a little peck.

“Do I still need to RSVP or will the offer still stand?” You mumbled against his lips.

You could feel his smile against your skin, before feeling another kiss come down on them.

“It wouldn’t be a celebration without you there.”

Yet here you were years later anxiously pacing your apartment and contemplating whether you should pick up the phone and at least greet him on his birthday before the clock strike midnight.

Part of you wanted to think that the split between you and Eddie was amicable, but in reality it was something so far from that. You had always thought that maybe Eddie would have seen it coming — that the growing distance and constant fighting was a telltale-sign of a break.

But he didn’t see it at all. In fact, he was completely blindsided.

“Just tell me how to make it better.” Eddie pleaded, holding your face in his hands, attempting to try to change your mind about your decision.

You couldn’t bear to look at him, to see the desperation, heartache, and confusion cluttering his features in the worst kind of way — the way that you couldn’t fix because it was coming from you.

“There’s nothing you can do,” you whimpered, shutting your eyes tightly as the salt poured down your cheeks and you forced your face away from his gentle touch.

He pursed his lips together, rubbing a rough hand down his face as the silence ate him up whole, not knowing if he was man enough to go in for a hug or ask you to leave and forget that you two ever existed in a world where you two loved each other.

Because he still loved you, even when you were standing in front of him, breaking his heart into a million pieces that were bound to be shattered all over again if he tried to make any other offers to fix it — fix you two.

Your sobs filled his bedroom, cries that even you couldn’t explain because no matter the distance or stupid fights you and Eddie got into, this was the last thing you wanted to do. Desperately you wanted to see it through, to know that you and him would grow out of the phase together and come out of it stronger, but you knew deep down that this was what you needed.

What your heart needed.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered, swiping your fingers over your eyes as you finally opened them, met with the sight of him still crestfallen.

You couldn’t stand to be there any longer, brushing past his figure as you dashed through the trailer and dug for your car keys in your pocket. He didn’t chase after you — you had already left him standing there and he couldn’t bear watching you drive away too.

You weren’t sure what you were sorry for — perhaps everything.

The way it went down.

For not giving him any warning signs.

Leaving him with no closure at all.

If he was taking the heartbreak personally, you wouldn’t blame him because if he had done you the way you did him, you’d be avoiding him, too.

In defense, he avoided you first, ignoring phone calls where you wanted to check up on him and see how he was doing. Instead, you were met with Uncle Wayne’s voice telling you that the boy was busy — busying himself with trying to forget you.

“Who is it?”

You could hear him asking in the background, quickly covered up by his uncle clearing his throat trying to mask his nephew’s voice. It was then that you understood that things would never be the same, that Eddie couldn’t even bring himself to talk to you anymore because for him it was like torture.

But sometimes you’d imagine it would be different had you gone a different route with ending things with him. That maybe if you had let him down slowly you two would still be friends, maybe even the potential of getting back together someday.

Late nights since the breakup were spent dreaming up the scenarios where you and Eddie could co-exist—

“How are doing?” You asked honestly, reaching out a steady hand that you rested upon his watching the way his eyes flickered with content.

“Fine. I’m doing really fine.”

But then you wake up, the black and white in your dark bedroom and the empty spot beside you, a reminder that it wasn’t real, and it sure wasn’t forever. That you had left him unexpectedly with a flame without yours…leaving him on fire.

The sound of your landline ringing halted your undying pacing. Your stare burning a hole through the phone that rattled on your coffee table. It was nearly eleven, just an hour left before his birthday would be done and over with.

He was probably at the Hideout celebrating with his band, so it couldn’t possibly be him.

“H-hello?” You answered, kneeling at the table while one hand picked up the phone and the other held your forehead.

“Hey you, how is it going?”

Robin Buckley, the only person in Eddie’s life that still remained in yours, but from a distance. No in person hang outs or daily phone calls, just occasional check in’s to see how you were holding up because she knew that the breakup was still affecting you the way it was doing Eddie.

You sighed, shutting your eyes as your fingers rubbed your temples.

“I—I’m fine…you know, just hanging around. What about you?”

There wasn’t much energy you had left to try to convince her that you were doing something way more interesting than overthinking the night away. Despite you and her not being really close or acquainted, Robin was an expert at one thing, and that was reading between the lines and picking up on things.

She didn’t want to put you on the spot. To tell you that from your voice alone, she could tell you were lying through your teeth. She already knew it was hard enough already and her pointing it out would only make you feel worse.

So she cut to the chase.

“I saw Eddie tonight…at the Hideout for his birthday. Nance and I stopped by to buy him a few drinks and give him his present. He’s wasted. I mean just completely shit faced—”

You took a sharp breath in, squinting your eyes that were about to turn salty all over again.

“Why are you telling me this?”

It came out harsher than you wanted, but really the last thing you wanted to hear about was how Eddie was having such a blast without you there. Part of you wanted to think that he would relocate his birthday celebration, assuming it would bring up too much hurt partying in the place where he planned to do it with you.

There was a hitch in her breathing, probably partly taken aback by your tone, but she worked past that.

“I just thought you should know…”

Her voice teetered on the edge of wanting to say more, to tell you the full story, but she didn’t. She didn’t know if it was her place to tell you everything Eddie had said tonight, how his birthday celebration came to shit the second he got an ounce of tipsy.

“I appreciate it, Robin, but really, I’m—I’m over it, him,” you corrected, “I know he’s having fun.”

You didn’t mean to just hang up without allowing her to speak or say goodbye, but you couldn’t help it. One more second on the line with her and even just another word spoken of his name, then you were sure that you’d end up a crying mess with her consoling you through the phone.

You didn’t want to picture him half drunk happy, chugging down shots without a care in the world for the hangover he’d have the next morning. The way he’d have to wake up without someone taking care of him and holding his hair back as he’d throw up everything in his system. The thought of thinking about who was going to drive him home and get him back to the trailer safely.

It was sickening…the worrying thoughts that still lingered in your head when it came to him. How you shouldn’t even be concerned in the first place because he was an adult and capable of taking care of himself. Yet here you were still worrying, imagining the life you two would be living if you stayed in each other’s lives.

Even two years later this feeling didn’t budge and you were sure that if it kept up, it would be enough confirmation that you had made the biggest mistake of your life — letting your one true love slip through your fingers and now all that he would be was a painful reminder of the love you lost when you were younger.

And you were afraid that how it was going to stay.

You ran your fingers through your hair, giving the ends of them a particularly hard tug out of pure frustration and annoyance. Taking a deep breath, your hands ran down your thighs before you stood up and for the first time tonight you stopped pacing.

Instead, you began flipping the light switches off, ready to turn in for the night and accept the fact that wishing Eddie a happy birthday would do neither of you any good.

Reopening that wound would make it hurt more than it already was. Just because you were hurting and searching for that closure didn’t mean that he owed you that. He didn’t owe you the light of day, not even fifteen seconds of his time on a phone call.

It was already over and it was best you left it that way — to move on and keep trying to forget as everything just kept pulling you under.

You glanced back at your dim living room, fingers ready to pull on the beaded string on the lamp to make the whole place dark before you proceeded to walk towards your bedroom and sulk the night away, being greeted by the love of your life in your dream.

But instead, before the whole place could illuminate black and white, there was a knock at your door. One that pounded hard, almost banging, followed by grumbles on the other side of it.

“A—are you in there? I wanna…wanna talk!”

Another round of loud and noisy knocks and for a second you thought you were in a dream. Pinching your skin to try to wake you up from the horrible nightmare that was tormenting you and your frail little heart. But to no one’s surprise, it was real — more knocking and his garbled talking confirmed it.

Your feet moved quickly against the wooden floors, crossing the boundaries between the living room and entrance where you stood on the other side of the door, fingers moving nimbly to undo the lock and chain before you pulled it open.

There he was in the flesh, leaning up against your doorframe, lazily keeping himself steady. He reeked of alcohol and you weren’t sure if it was merely his deep breathing that pushed the sharp smell of vodka and whisky towards your nostrils — or if he had spilt a drink or two all over himself, but it was clear that he was wasted.

Just as Robin had told you — maybe even more.

You wanted to avoid eye contact, to try to focus your sights on somewhere other than his deep brown orbs that could see right through you, but it was futile. Immediately your eyes met, the stare lingering so intensely, speaking volumes in the most silent and torturous way possible.

Though he was intoxicated, he still knew you like the back of his hand. Could read every emotion that covered your face and even beneath the exterior that you tried to put on. He knew you had been crying.

The swollen skin around your eyes dropping them down and making them look sadder than usual.

The tip of your nose red from the constant sniffles and swipes of tissue.

The frown that remained on your face and the slight quiver of your top lip that indicated you were holding it back all over again.

“W-what are you doing here?” Your voice was small and gravelly, breaking harshly, and though you coughed to try to play it off, he still knew.

Eddie watched you. The way your arms crossed over your chest and you finally had the courage to flicker your sights away from him, looking down at his covered feet instead. Your fingers tips pinching and tightening on your skin awaiting his response.

“I don’t know…t—to say that I’m sorry.”

You pinched your brows together, snapping your head up to look at him, “Sorry? Sorry for what, exactly?”

He shrugged his shoulders as he frowned deep and shook his head like he didn’t even know why he was here standing in front of you.

“Before you left, you said sorry…b-but you didn’t give me a chance to say it.”

You didn’t know what to say, hell you didn’t even know if you had any words left to speak even if there was still so much left unspoken. You stood there, eyes glued to his droopy ones that blinked slowly before he finally leaned off the wood and took a step back further into the hallway.

He was stumbling over his feet, but you didn’t dare take a step forward to help him. Eddie didn’t need you to. He regained his balance with his head down, holding a finger out towards you in a sign for you to wait. To not shut the door and leave him out again.

“Why couldn’t you just…just let me fix it?”

He tumbled over his words, keeping his head low in an effort to not break down here right now, but he couldn’t help but look at you when all he got was silence.

You swallowed, biting your tongue while the tips of your fingers turned white from the harsh pinching, desperate to want to run away and hide even when this was all you wanted for the past two years.

“You didn’t even let me try. Do you know how much it h-hurts?”

The end of his question broke with his voice, a whimper and a crack that let you know that the salt would start pouring any second now. And it was the same for you, his figure now a blurry mess as you croaked and shook your head, still not speaking.

He jabbed his finger into his chest while his face scrunched up, almost turning red with the tears that began to pool in his eyes.

“I…I still love you and you were supposed to be there tonight. I kept hoping you would show up. T-that you didn’t forget—”

Your foot stomped against the floorboards as you finally let up on your arm and brought your hands up to your cheeks to whip the tears away.

“I didn’t forget, Eddie! How the hell could you think I could ever forget?”

Here you two stood yet again, resorting to this…whatever this was.

You didn’t try to shut the door or step back as he finally stepped closer, closing the space between the both of you and just leaving inches. His face was nearly nose to nose with you as you both stood there and breathed in everything.

The regret.

The longing.

The pain.

The loss.

The love that never left.

All of it flooding your senses and screaming at you to say everything that you had been bottling up. To release everything that you had taken with you under the waves of wicked currents in winless fights. That even if the lights were on or off, life without him was black and white, the cruelest kind of way to live because he showed you color that you could never see with anyone else.

And unlike the last time you and Eddie stood in front of each other, this time you didn’t pinch your eyes shut or move away from his hands that clutched your cheek. He didn’t have to be the love of your life inside your head when he was standing right before you.

“I missed you…and I’m sorry.”

💌 reblogs, tags, comments, + likes are greatly appreciated! leave a comment and let me know if want to be added to my taglist!! 💌

taglist: @translatemunson @kennedy-brooke @manda-panda-monium @tvserie-s-world @givemeth @steveharringtonswife @astolenkiss @loving-and-dreaming @awkotaco24 @engenelxver @elfiaaaa @pbs-theundeadmaggot @johnricharddeacy @gaysludge @scoopshxrrington @micheledawn1975 @ihatepeanutss

a/n: my first pure angst feel kinda fic that i've written! i don't have a part 2 planned for this yet, but maybe i'll write one depending on how i am feeling and what i think the future would look like for reader and eddie!! i love "21" by gracie and this song just screamed eddie vibes...i hope you guys like it!!!

[ilovewriting06]

Permanent Fix

The sound of the bell makes me frown as my handsome, beautiful, and wonderful boyfriend pulls away from our impromptu make out session. I whine when he fully slips away, "No, come on Stiles. I can only take so much of this torture."

He raises an eyebrow with a smirk, "What torture? I haven't done anything to you."

I throw my head back against the wall maintaining eye contact with Stiles, "That's the point, Babe. You look so good today, like absolutely drop dead gorgeous, good. I don't know why, I mean I do, because you're hot, but I also don't, I don't understand what it is about you today that makes me want to climb you like a tree."

Stiles' face turns a dark shade of red as he chews on his bottom lip, "Babe, I swear, if you keep talking I'm going to do something that we'll both regret. I don't think your mom will take it well if we get busted for having sex in an empty classroom. Plus your mom scares me."

I lean forwards and rub my cheek on his practically purring, "You sure it's not my brother you're scared of, hmm? Are you scared of Mister True Alpha?" He lets out a shaky breath and grabs my shoulders holding me away from him, "Alright, okay, we really have to stop. You're brother has a super sniffer 3000, and can smell us"

I pout and whine again, "I have one too! And I can smell your arousal, and that absolutely delicious vanilla and cinnamon scent you have. It makes me want to do things, unholy things. Stiles, I have this really deep rooted urge to fuck you, and I don't know why, but it hurts. It's all I can think about."

His eyebrows furrow and he tilts his head to the side like he's studying every detail that I have before he steps back completely, "So, how long have you been a werewolf?"

I shrug with a confused frown, "I don't know, almost a year I think. Why?"

He narrows his eyes and hums before asking, "Is this the first time you've felt like that since then?"

I shrug again, "Uh, I have for the last few days, but it wasn't this bad, this time it's taking everything in me to not just shove you on the floor and ride you."

Stiles lets out a strangled noise before shaking his head slightly before asking another question, "Right, okay, and this time, do you like have an overwhelming urge to get pregnant. Like, I dunno...do you want a baby?"

My mouth drops and I let out a squeak, "A...what?! What the hell, Stiles?! Why is that important?"

"Just answer the question, yes or no."

My mouth opens and closes a few times and I shift on my feet for a few seconds before mumbling out the answer, "I...yeah, I-I guess, but I've always wanted kids, especially with you, but I guess you could say it's a little amplified today."

Stiles' eyes widen and he steps back nodding a few times, "Right, okay, yeah, so, we're leaving school, like right now." I furrow my eyebrows before allowing him to drag me through the halls and out to his precious jeep. He helps me in before running to the driver's side and climbing in.

I look at him and blink a couple times as he starts the jeep, "Not, that I'm complaining about the idea of going home and having sex, but I have a feeling that isn't going to be happening? And you left our bags in there."

He pulls out of the parking lot and glances at me, "Put on your seatbelt, and yeah I know, I'll just have Scott get them for us."

I quickly put on my seatbelt as I speak, "Won't he be suspicious as to why we skipped the last three periods of the day? And what are we telling our parents? Cause they'll be pissed we skipped."

Stiles lays his head back on the seat and nods, "Yeah, well I think they'll let us off this time and Scott's probably gonna throw a fit and almost puke when he figures out why we skipped."

I sit up and look at Stiles with a smile, "Are we going to have sex?! Did you actually let us skip school so we can fuck?"

Stiles snorts and shakes his head, "No." He hesitates to say something else and it has him kind of worried. "What? Stiles what's wrong? Am I dying? Are you mad because I admitted that I want to have your baby...well babies."

He shakes his head and lets out a deep breath, "No, I...god this is not how I expected my Tuesday to go. Y/N/N, I think you're in heat, or at least going into heat."

"What. the. fuck. Stiles Stilinski, I am not a dog, werewolves don't have heat cycles."

He doesn't answer as he parks the jeep but when I look up I notice we're at Deaton's. I level Stiles with a glare as he pulls me into the back of the clinic as I continue my previous argument, "Stiles, werewolves don't have heat cycles! I'm not in heat, nor am I going into heat either."

"Actually, werewolves can have heat cycles, but it isn't a common occurrence."

I screech and turn to my right to see Deaton holding a cat like some creepy ass villain from some 80's movie. Stiles who was surprisingly not scared by Deaton's presence, stops to stand in front of Deaton and pulls me to his side before gesturing up and down my body, "She's in heat. I don't know how, or why, but she is and I'm worried if we don't figure something out it'll get worse and she'll be in more pain than she already is."

I elbow him in the ribs and hiss, "What the fuck Stiles, you literally brought me to the vet?"

He ignores my comment and looks at Deaton as Deaton tilts his head in consideration before humming, "And what makes you think that Mr. Stilinski."

Without missing a beat Stiles answers, confidence in his words, "She wants a baby."

I step away from Stiles before growling, "Seriously! That's what this is about, and you had to share it with Dr. Doolittle? If you don't want kids that's fine but you don't have to do it in front of somebody, in fact I would appreciate if you would tell me that in private."

Stiles' eyes widen and he steps forwarding flailing his arms, "No! I mean yes, fuck, I want kids. I do, but something's off about you today. I've practically had to fight you off me all day and you're extra growly at literally anyone that even breathes in my direction." I go to object bit he continues, "You stabbed Scott in the hand for patting my shoulder, and then practically threatened to kill Erica because she sat by me for a whole two seconds to ask a question. And I thought you were just in a mood and horny, but, but then you said that I smelled like vanilla and cinnamon."

The more information he gives me the more confused I get, "What? You're mad because I think you smell like vanilla and cinnamon? I don't see what the big deal is, you smell like my two favorites things."

"That is the big deal, Y/N!"

Before either of us can utter another word Deaton steps in, "I think Mr. Stilinski has a valid argument." I stare in disbelief before he continues, "Perhaps it would be better if we sit down, this could be a long conversation."

------------------------

"There are myths and legends that claim that when a werewolf meets their mate and they're mature enough their mate will carry a specific smell, usually consisting of two or more smells that the werewolf loves. In this case Stiles smells like cinnamon and vanilla to you while to Scott and everyone else he doesn't. To them he smells like sandalwood and citrus. They're only considered myths because there has been very little documented proof, only being a handful of cases. The chances of meeting your mate are extremely rare, close to a 1 in 1,000 chance."

I grab Stiles' hand and he rubs the back of my hand with his thumb as I ask, "What does that have to do with me possibly being in heat?"

Deaton smiles and continues, "Heats are as rare as mates simply because a werewolf doesn't go into heat unless they're with their mate. After meeting their mate a werewolf won't go into heat until their wolf determines that they're ready and that their mate is ready. Once the wolf decides that it's ready, the werewolf goes into heat. Usually the first few days of a heat cycle aren't bad but the longer the wolf goes without being mated the worse it gets and a lot of heat cycles can last for a month a time."

The room is filled with silence for a few seconds before I sigh, "Okay, I have so many questions."

Deaton nods his head for me to continue so I ask my first question, "So, I'm supposed to live in increasing agony for the foreseeable future, unless Stiles gets me pregnant?"

Beside me Stiles chokes on his spit as Deaton chuckles, "No, that is one way, but it's only a temporary fix. Once your child reaches about a year old your wolf will demand another and you'll endure more heat cycles until you're pregnant again. However, there is another way that's a permanent fix."

I run a hand through my hair, "What's the permanent fix?"

Deaton grabs a book off of his shelf before handing it to me, "You mate, but don't go into it lightly, it's a lifelong commitment. It's not like marriage, you can't change your mind and get a divorce, it lasts forever, or at least until one of you dies."

I flip through the pages of the book before looking back at Deaton, "How does it work? The whole mating part?"

Deaton points at the book before sitting down, "Everything you need to know is in there, the pages you need are marked. I assumed you would need it soon." The doorbell out front rings and Deaton stands again, "Read through it while I see to my patient and if you have any questions I'll answer them the best that I can."

-------------------------------------------------------

As Stiles and I read through the marked pages my eyes widen as I get to the actual mating process. "I have to bite you?" Stiles looks at me and nods when I get to the next line, "You have to bite me?! How the hell does that work? You don't have pointy teeth, you have dull teeth."

"He does have pointy teeth, if the occasion calls for them." I jump and turn to the door to see Deaton walking further into the room.

"What do you mean?"

Deaton takes his seat in front of us before explaining, "Think about it, why did your wolf choose now to be the time to be mated? What's changed in the last few months?"

I narrow my eyes as I think about it but Stiles is the one that speaks first, "I did." I look at Stiles before looking at Deaton to see him nod in agreement, "You did, you embraced your spark. I do believe it was two months ago that you got a good handle on it, allowing you to perform a few docile spells and simple magic."

I lay my head on Stiles' shoulder and rub my cheek on his shirt and listen as Stiles pieces everything together, "My spark recognizes her as our mate, doesn't it?" I notice Deaton nod out of my peripheral before Stiles continues, "So, my spark will provide the bite for the whole mating process. It'll give me wolfy teeth until the bite fest is over."

I whine low in my throat as I look up at Stiles from where my head lays on his shoulder. From this angle the light shines just right on the side of his face that it looks like he's glowing, and his jaw line looks absolutely delicious. I can feel my wolf pacing inside demanding that we take our mate. For some reason now that I know what my wolf has apparently known the whole time, that Stiles is our mate, it makes the urge to fuck him ten times worse because all I can think about is all the different positions that we can try.

Stiles looks at me before looking at Deaton, "So, pretty sure she's slowly getting further into heat." I rub my face in his neck and wiggle closer as I fight the shift that begging to get out.

Stiles and Deaton talk some more but I'm not registering a thing they say. I gain some of my senses back when Stiles shifts and runs his thumb over my cheekbone as he looks in my eyes, "Hey Baby, come on we gotta go. I'll make you feel better I promise."

-------------------------------------------------------

Once Stiles finally managed to snap me out of the sex filled haze I was in we went back to my house and made a few phone calls after packing for a week long trip. Now his dad, my mom, Scott, and the rest of the pack will be here in a few minutes so we can explain to them that we'll be MIA for a week.

Apparently when I was zoned out at Deaton's, Deaton explained that for the mating process to fully take affect it'll take 3-4 days of pretty much nonstop sex and apparently a ton of biting on my part. Something about the incessant urge to claim him or something, put the only one that his spark will allow to scar over is the mating bite, which despite popular belief can be anywhere on the body and not just the neck.

I jump slightly as the sound of my mom's car pulls into the driveway, followed by Noah's cruiser. I scoot closer to Stiles as my leg jumps up and down. The soothing hand on the back of my neck helps me calm down a little bit but I still feel jittery. Stiles and I had talked about what we wanted to do and we decided that we've loved each other since we knew what love was and we were always planning on getting married. Turns out the Sheriff had given Stiles his mother's engagement ring a few months ago and told Stiles to give to me when 'the timing was right,' Stiles had apparently already gotten it resized.

We had already been all in with each other for four years, only two of which Scott knew about, his stupid werewolf nose busted us, but we decided that doing the whole mating bite ritual or whatever you want to call it didn't really change anything. It just gave every supernatural creature the knowledge that we were mated and it gave my wolf reassurance that he was ours and we didn't have to have his child to keep him around. Seriously, what is my life?

By the time our parents walk in I'm practically sitting on Stiles from how close I was. They took one look at us and our nervous demeanor before Mom spoke, "Oh God, you're pregnant aren't you?" She turns to Noah and continues, "I knew this was going to happen."

I look between Noah and Mom before looking at Stiles and then back at Mom, "Actually, I'm not. Although it's not for lack of trying on my wolf's part. She's practically begging for a baby." At this moment I had never been happier for our parents to know about the supernatural because it made this conversation so much easier.

Within seconds Noah and Mom are sitting across from us when Noah looks at Stiles, "Is this a meeting to tell us you're planning on having a baby?"

Stiles' mouth opens and looks at me. I scowl, "Of course, the one time your speechless is the time I need you to run your mouth." I turn to Noah and shake my head, "No, not exactly, but we're going away for about a week."

Their eyes widen but before they can speak the slamming of car doors alert us that the rest of the pack is here. The front door opens as Scott practically sprints in, "Oh thank God, I though someone died."

The rest of the pack spill into the living room and pick various places to sit, stand, or lean against a wall around the room. When everyone's settles I take a deep breath and look at Stiles before turning to see everyone anxiously waiting, "Have any of you heard of werewolf mates?" As I was anticipating everyone looks confused before shaking their heads. "Okay, what about a werewolf heat cycle?"

This time Erica speaks, "Oh, my God! Is that why you smell like you're so desperate you'd fuck anything with a dick?"

I blush and sink further into Stiles as Scott, Lydia, Isaac, and Mom yell, "ERICA!"

This time Stiles is the one to speak since I'm sitting on his lap rethinking all of my life choices, "Okay, first of all, that's rude and second of all, yeah pretty much."

I frown and feel a mixture of anger and hurt as I look at Stiles before sliding off his lap and onto the couch before putting multiple feet between us, "So, you think I stink too? If that's the case what are we doing this for? You can't reverse it, it's permanent. Maybe you need to rethink your decision." Part of me knows I'm overreacting especially since Stiles can't even smell my arousal, but my wolf has like 80% of my control right now and she's butt hurt at the comment.

Stiles sits up straighter than a ruler before reaching out for me, "Baby, no, I don't need to rethink it, I want to do it. Trust me, I am more than ready for that level of commitment."

Mom cuts in this time with a suspicious lilt to her voice, "Okay, it's really sounding like you guys are planning on having a baby, or getting married."

At her statement we look at her and Stiles finally spits out what we've been trying and failing to say, "Okay, no to the baby part and kind of to the married part. Y/N/N and I have to go away for a few days because she's in heat and don't you fucking dare make any jokes about it because she has very little control right now and if she mauls you, that's your fault. Anyways, werewolves only go into heat once they've met their mate, in this case, yours truly," he enunciates that part by pointing at himself before continuing, "and the longer they go unmated the stronger and more painful the heat cycle gets. There are only two ways to resolve the issue, one is we have a baby, but that isn't a permanent solution because once the baby is a year old the cycles will start again until she has another baby. The second option is if we mate. Uh, I'm not going to go into details because those are some things I never, ever, not in a million years want to openly discuss with our parents and her brother, or anyone else for that matter. Let's just say, it's a very intimate tradition."

I grab the book of the coffee table and hand it to Mom, "The pages about it are marked if you want to fully understand but if you'd rather not get all the nitty gritty details all you have to know is on the first page that's marked."

Her and Noah flip to the first page and read it with Scott peeking from behind the couch. After a few seconds Noah look's scarred, Scott looks like he's about to pass out, and Mom just looks intrigued and a little nervous, "This says you have to give the mating bite to each other, but Stiles isn't a wolf."

I nod before crawling back into Stiles' lap, "He's not, but he is a spark. His spark recognizes me as their mate so in the moment his spark will provide the werewolf teeth that are needed for the mating process. From the looks on Noah and Scott's face I assume you got to the part as to why we have to be gone for a week?"

She slowly nodded before handing the book back to me only to be intercepted by Erica snagging it from her grip. Erica scans through the marked pages before whistling, "Yeah, definitely see why you gotta leave for a week. You'll be having loads of fun, multiple times."

I roll my eyes before walking over to her and taking the book out of her hands with a sigh, "Erica, can you not make jokes about it? It's something serious. Yeah, we get to have sex a lot, but it's a forever thing. It's not like marriage, we can't change our minds later and divorce, which even if it was it wouldn't happen, I've been in love with him since I was like seven so that wouldn't happen, but still. We'll be even more connected than we are now and it'll kill us to be away from each other for more than a day. I'll be able to feel his emotions, and he'll feel mine. It's going to take us a few days to balance everything and get used to the changes so it isn't all hot sex and love making there's other things we have to learn to balance out before I'll be in control of my wolf again. To be honest she's practically salivating at the mouth to beat the shit out of you because she thinks you're making fun of her or something."

Erica deflates a little and a small whine is barely audible as she apologizes, "I'm sorry Y/N/N, I can smell how stressed and nervous you two are, I was just trying reduce some of your stress." I smile and squeeze her bicep in a comforting manner before turning to everyone, "Okay, anyone that isn't blood related to us needs to scram. We need to go over the finer details with Mom and Noah, and Scott has to stay so if he passes out Mom can deal with it."

Everyone chuckles except for Scott who pouts, "I'm not gonna pass out, it's just gross. It's like helping my sister and brother plan on how to bone each other for the next week."

I roll my eyes as I usher everyone out, "Jesus Scotty, you aren't helping us plan anything it's just nice to have the support of my brother."

-----------------------------------------------

After everyone left and the only one's left were Mom, Scott, and Noah I make my way back over to Stiles before curling up into his lap finding that it helps calm the stupid wolf who is currently rolling around like an idiot with her tongue out.

After sitting in silence for a few minutes Noah clears his throat, "So, are you guys leaving tonight? If it gets as painful as the book says it was I feel like the sooner you left the better."

Well, that wasn't expected. Stiles looks at his dad with wide eyes before finding the words he's trying to say, "Y-you aren't going to try and stop us? We can't technically go anywhere without permission from you and Mel, but I was expecting you to try and talk us out of it."

This time Mom leans forward and shakes her head with a soft smile, "I read the first page and the way they described the pain of prolonged heat cycles I'm okay with it as long as Noah is. I mean, I know you two are sexually active." She's cut off by a dramatic gag from Scott who she rolls her eyes at before continuing, "I know you plan on getting married, I've seen the ring, and he asked me for your hand in marriage when he was ten and I gave it to him then so I'm not going to change my mind now. I'd sign the papers for you to get married tomorrow if that's what you wanted because Stiles is less than a month away from being 18 and you and Scott are only a few months younger than him so you're pretty close to 18 too. Add on the supernatural angle of it and there is no chance that either of you will split up. I knew that without even knowing about the whole werewolf mate crap. So if you want to do this I'll support you the whole way."

I sniffle and squeeze Stiles' hand as Noah sighs, "As much as I don't want my only child to grow up so fast, I agree with Melissa. Knowing you two you probably have somewhere to go and you two are pretty much married as it is, although I sense that Y/N will practically be living here wants you two get back, so there will be some boundaries which is really just one, please, for the love of God, no PDA in front of me."

I perk up at the permission to pretty much live with them before turning to straddle Stiles but before I can say anything to him I realize this position probably wasn't the best idea when I rub against his abs just right. I realize that any and all control I had was about five seconds away from saying hasta la vista and booking a one way ticket to the Bahamas and that if I plan to not break the no PDA rule we have to leave.

I stand and straighten my shirt acting as if nothing happened before grabbing Stiles' hand and pulling him up, "Okay, Mom, Noah, nice talk but I think it's time we go. We'll be staying at a private rental house type thing a few towns over, probably forty-five minutes away so if you need us, uh, I guess call me, but ONLY if it's an emergency."

Before they have time to answer I give them a quick hug and kiss on the cheek before patting Scott on the shoulder and booking it out the door as I yell, "I'll be in the jeep. Stiles make it quick, I beg of you."

Not even ten seconds after I get in the jeep Stiles is running down the stairs and flinging his door open and climbing in. No words are spoken as he starts the jeep and takes off down the road.

I take a deep breath and nod, "Okay, I see why you said we had to leave school early. I want to apologize in advance because I can't promise that there won't be ripped clothes once we get inside and I want you to know that I really, really love you and I want to do this. I want to spend forever with you and I really want to see that ring now."

He chuckles before grabbing my thigh gently, and somehow it grounds me instead of working me up even more, "I actually have the ring with me because I was thinking that maybe we could go ahead and start planning a wedding. Assuming you want to."

I smile and grab his hand, "Is this you asking me to marry you? In a very untraditional way?"

"Maybe, do you want me to ask you to marry me?"

I nod once and answer without hesitation, "Yes."

He chuckles and squeezes my leg, "Okay then, Y/N light of my life, the woman I want to spend eternity with, will you marry me?"

I squeeze his hand even tighter accidently as excitement courses through my veins, "Yes. Absolutely, si, ja, oui, and any other way you can say yes. I've dreamed of marrying you since you kissed me under the slide in second grade. God you were a good kisser back then for only being 8, but damn you've upped your game, in the last two years since all this bullshit started."

I smirk at the blush that climbs up his neck and spreads across his cheeks, "So, how long till we get there because I'm not going to lie the thought of having sex with my fiancé is making this feeling worse and I am desperate."

He groans and shudders, "About ten minutes but I can make it in five."

[rishiguro]

BETRAYAL - DABI

a/n: happy (belated) birthday my burnt chicken nugget.

warnings: prohero!reader; literal m*rder; major character death; dabi’s real name; choking; violence; swearing; 4k of angst

“i should have seen this coming,” dabi snarled, his black boot pressing onto your chest as he towered over you, hands in his pockets, “i should’ve known”

you stared up at his dark figure, eyes narrowing at him. the damp ground underneath you was cold, you could feel your clothes absorbing some of the water, sticking against your skin. pebbles pressed against your back, the weight of the villains foot drove them deeper into your body with every passing second.

“any last words, hero?”

you couldn’t see how he had his fists clenched, fingernails digging deep into his skin. he looked at you with hatred, disgust — a look you knew he would send you sooner or later and yet hurt so much.

would he believe you if you said you didn’t want this? would he believe you if you said you never wanted it to be like this? would he believe any word that would hush over your busted lip anymore?

“you don’t have to do this,” you replied calmly, completely contradicting your irregular heartbeat and pressed breaths.

you looked up at his hunched form, his jacket flowing due to the slight wind in the alley. dabi held his head high, his eyes looking at you with disgust and hate.

it has always been only a matter of time until you‘d be subjected to this look of his — a look that was reserved for his enemies and everybody else that would even dare to stand in his way. it was inevitable, obvious that one day you‘d be on the receiving end, you had told yourself this the moment you first came in contact with him. dabi was a villain, a threat to society, a threat to every person that was just peacefully living their life. he was your enemy.

you couldn’t die here. you had a responsibility, a duty to protect the people of this town, this country.

and yet you failed, disappointing everyone in the process. your colleagues, the commission, the civilians. your friends, your family.

“maybe i don���t. but i fucking want to,” the villain huffed through his clenched teeth, putting more of his bodyweight onto your chest, making you wince in pain, “theres nothing i want more than to see you cry out in pain, begging for me to make it stop. to put you out of your misery”

you should have never agreed to this mission, not like you had a choice anyways; not like you would’ve declined anyways. they needed you and who were you to turn your back on them?

looking back, you maybe should have. maybe then you wouldn’t be here with an infamous villain threatening you — killing you. you wouldn’t leave anybody behind, you wouldn’t have violated your duty and you wouldn’t have betrayed your colleagues and your cause.

you wouldn’t have played with the thought to turn your back on them.

how did it get this far?

the weight on your chest lifted and you greedily sucked in a deep breath, filling your lungs with air. yet before you could take in another, you were forcibly grabbed by the shoulders and pulled up, your back soon crashing into a brick wall. you pressed your eyes shut, forcing yourself to not wince in pain.

“maybe i should just set you on fire right here, right now,” dabi continued, one hand on your throat as he stretched the other one out dramatically, “do you think your little hero friend would manage to save you in time?”

you clenched your jaw, hands weakly pulling on the one on your throat.

he turned back to you, his second hand now also closing around your throat, pushing you further into the cold wall, a sadistic smile on his lips. “he’s supposed to be the fastest one after all, isn’t he?”

you kept quiet however, only struggling against the villain‘s hold. you could feel his hands heating up on your skin, eyes slightly widening when you felt the rise in temperature.

“i’m curious”

how could you let it get so far? how could you allow yourself to fall so deep, to betray everyone and mostly betray yourself? and how were you even supposed to live with yourself after this — if you somehow managed to get out of this hopeless situation, that is.

“then kill me. kill me right now and find out,” you managed to reply, keeping your eyes on his face. you knew that you had no way of possibly getting out of this. dabi knew what you did, he knew who you were and he knew why you were with the league, with him. and no matter what, there was no way dabi would forgive you for this.

yet you couldn’t stop yourself from hoping that he would.

the villain tilted his head, his heated hands cooling down. he scoffed. “so willing to die after all?”

no. yes. maybe. you weren’t sure.

no, you didn’t want to die. but could you live on like this, knowing what you did, knowing what you had thought? could you continue your life like this, mentally trying to convince yourself that you did the right thing, that you did what you had to, that no matter what, you did your duty and your duty as a hero came first. waking up every morning to the blank ceiling in your home, your blanket wrapped around your legs, as you tried to believe the mantra you repeated to yourself every day.

how could you stay a hero, smiling at clueless civilians, saving them from villains, knowing that you were no better? knowing that you had considered leaving your hero self behind, leaving your entire life behind? knowing how your entire life you romanticized a flawed and corrupt system and even chose to become a part of it?

but did any of this even matter? at the end of the day, it wasn’t your choice, wasn’t it? your life laid in the hands of the villain in front of you whose hands were literally on your throat.

you closed your eyes in resignation. maybe it was for the best, you thought, slowly coming to terms with your reality. was this your punishment for betraying your morals? “if you could do me one last favor? do it quick”

dabi slightly furrowed his eyebrows. he didn’t want to admit it, but this was the first time he had seen you so passive. it wasn’t like you to not fight, to not yell, to act so defeated. where was your fire, your passion? how dare you not fight back? how dare you be so dejected? you were supposed to give him everything you got, you were supposed to show him just why and how you became a hero, you were supposed to protect yourself and defend yourself, your honor, your pride? how dare you to give him nothing?

how dare you to betray him for nothing?

“give me one reason why i should” dabi clicked his tongue, squeezing your throat. “one fucking reason”

he wanted to hear you plead, beg for your life. give him any reason, your duty, your family, friends, anything and he wouldn’t care. he wanted you to be hopeful, he might even play along and consider allowing you to walk away with severe injuries but still alive. he wanted to see the hope rise in your eyes before he would crush it with his own hands.

you should feel hurt, hopeless, betrayed.

however, what you said, caught dabi by surprise. “you love me,” you stated calmly, eyes piercing through his turquoise ones.

you don’t know what you expected, you don’t even know why you said it. after all, you embodied the very thing he despised more than anything, the one thing he swore to destroy. a shiny hero, adored by the public, that is nothing more than a cruel puppet, willing to do anything to bring the very same people down, that the system you protected with your life, failed to save.

disgusting. why would he love you?

“i don’t,” the villain shot back immediately, voice filled with fury. bringing his head next to yours, you could feel his warm breath on your ear as he continued. “i never did,” he spat angrily.

there was something about him that made you question him. the way his eye twitched, how he pressed his teeth together, how his grip on you tightened, pressing you hard against the concrete wall, like he wanted to bury you inside of it.

“i don’t believe you,” you managed to choke out, shaking in his hold. in return, dabi narrowed his eyes at you, before throwing his head back and erupting in chaotic laughter.

“since when do heroes believe villains anyway? all we do is lie and betray,” he proclaimed, one of his hands letting go of your throat as he gestured into the empty alley, like he was on a stage, reciting a dramatic monologue.

after a few seconds dabi huffed and turned back to you, his lips curled into a sadistic smile, his eyes cold. “didn’t know a hero had it in them too,” he mocked you.

“you’ve lied a lot in your life, touya,” you stated, your words coming out pressed and barely audible as you gasped for air.

“but you can’t lie to me”

dabi — touya — was a lot. a criminal, a villain, a murderer, you knew that. just like he said, he was a liar too. he lied to get his way, he lied to lure people in and he lied just for the fun of it, just because he could. he lied to you too. he tried to put you on the wrong track, he lied to conceal the league’s plans from you because he didn’t trust you when you met, he lied just to annoy you.

but dabi forgot that after all the months you have spend together, you got to knew him and his habits. you inevitably grew closer, talked more and dare you even say understood each other‘s mannerisms. as much as he hated to admit it, you knew him just as well as he knew you.

“i always lie, to everyone,” the villain claimed boldly, the cold smile still on his lips. he sounded so condescending as he continued to mock you. “surely you’re not so arrogant to think that you’re an exception”

how dare you tell him that you know him? how dare you tell him that you don’t believe him? you lied, deceived, so why would you think he wouldn’t do the same?

“i’m going to fucking enjoy this”

“what’s there to enjoy”

much to your surprise, a laugh erupted from dabi.

“i wanted to kill you the moment you were brought to us,” he claimed, face inching closer to yours as he placed his hand on your cheek, the warmth of his palm sending shivers down your back. dabi hummed. “see the life drain out of your eyes and hear you scream like the pathetic thing you are”

“but you didn’t,” you replied stiffly, staring at the villain in front of you. his breath was hot on your lips, he was close, way too close given the situation you were in.

but you knew this look, you were familiar with how his scars looked up close, his triple pierced nostril and every patch of burned skin on his flesh.

“i didn’t,” he confirmed, nodding slightly. he ripped himself away from you right after, eyes narrowing again as he examined your face. the cold air hit you immediately, you felt like your cheeks were burning. “but no one can stop me now”

you tried to take a deep breath again, holding your chin high, trying your best to stand your ground. “then get it over with”

and again he laughed, his voice booming through the dark alley.

“why? i should drag this out, shouldn’t i?” he asked rhetorically, his mind already made up.

dabi wanted you like this. resigned, afraid, hopeless, at his mercy. looking at him with watchful eyes, over-analyzing every movement, no matter how small, and bracing yourself for the moment he would strike. you looked like a cornered animal, completely helpless. pathetic.

“a pro hero, right here, just willing to die by my hands. what a sight for sore eyes”

he smirked, inching his face closer to you again, only stopping when you could feel his hot breath on your ear. “that’s not something i get to enjoy every day”

“you’re torturing yourself”

dabi hummed again, much to your surprise even nodding his head slightly at your statement before shrugging. “who cares? nothing will satisfy me more than to kill you myself”

“then do it!” you screamed back, resisting against his hold of you again, only to earn a raised brow from the villain.

you knew he wouldn’t let you go, no matter what you were to say. threats, promises, nothing could persuade him. you were mere minutes away from death and nothing in your power could stop it from happening.

no one could stop it and no one would come to save you.

“go on. kill me. leave me here to rot for all i care. but when i‘m gone, there will be no one left who ever loved you“

from the very first moment you saw him, you knew who he was and what he had done, obviously you did. you had every piece of information available on every member of the league that you knew of. you knew their stories.

but him?

dabi was a blank space, a mystery. it was like he had just appeared one day, desperate to cause chaos and destruction wherever he went. and as much as you hated to admit it, that was what was so interesting about him, what almost drew you in. you wanted to know more, you needed to know more. what could make a person drive to kill innocents with seemingly no motive, haunt the streets of the city at night, causing panic wherever he went just because he could?

it wasn’t easy to find out more about him — mostly because nobody, not even the people that called themselves his friends, knew anything. he was a closed and locked book, nobody having the key to even read one page of him.

“shut up,” he shouted back, violently pushing you against the wall again. your head began to spin at the impact, vision flooding with a few tears before it cleared again. “shut the fuck up”

you didn’t know how you actually got closer to him and you certainly didn’t know why he decided to open up to you. was it some form of bait? was it genuine? at this point, you weren’t sure what you would prefer.

if it was nothing more than bait, trying to make you feel safe around him, trying to lure you in, you had to accept that the villain managed just that. he pulled you in and dragged you down, just like he had planned.

but what if it was genuine? what if he confided in you because he trusted you, because he believed that even though you were his enemy, something was different? that somehow you could leave this behind, that it didn’t matter and that you were someone he could trust. someone that wouldn’t ever betray him.

but at the end, you did. at heart, you were a hero after all, the commission‘s puppet, willing to protect the fragile legs your system stood on — not caring if you hurt people in the process and certainly not caring about the ones your system kicked away like trash.

all you knew was that he told you. he told you of the little boy touya. he told you of his family, his father. he told you about the shoes touya had to fill and how at the end it was so easy to just toss him aside.

and you comforted him, as much as you could. you showed sympathy and you felt pity. pity for the boy that wanted to become a hero more than anything, the boy that was turned away. a boy that was hurt so deeply that he had nothing left anymore.

“no one, touya”

what kind of person were you to exploit this very part of him?

“don’t call me that,” he demanded immediately, expression changing to one full of anger. there was no touya.

“that’s your name,” you only stated.

what were you trying to do? trying to appeal in the hopeful and ambitious boy inside of him? were you seriously hoping that this would change anything?

“touya died the day dabi was born,” the villain claimed loudly, eyes shut tightly as he spoke.

there was no more touya. touya died on a hill, leaving his childish dreams of being a hero and proving himself behind. dabi was all that mattered now. he found a new purpose, a goal in him and he would allow nothing and no one to stand in his way.

“i don’t believe you”

“i don’t care,” dabi spat back immediately, voice still booming as his palm heated up against your throat, your eyes widening when you felt the rapid rise in temperature, squirming in his hold. “it means jack shit to me”

you could hear how shallow his breathing was, how he tried to regain control of himself. slowly but surely his palm cooled down again.

“just like you” his eyes scanned your face again, narrowing slightly.

“hero” you knew of his, and frankly, the league‘s, distaste for you and your fellow heroes. the supposed protectors of society, yet the ones that cause the rise of villains in the first place. you saw how they rolled their eyes whenever someone even dared to mention a hero name, how their jaw clenched and how they loudly proclaimed that heroes were the true villains. but this was the first time that dabi had spat your profession, your cause, your entire being right at your feet.

“what are you waiting for?” you asked again, trying to ignore how heavy your chest felt.

the villain clicked his tongue and shook his head. “i’m surprised you care so little about your own life,” he said sighing. “aren’t you supposed to fight till the end?”

wasn’t this already the end? what was left for you to fight for? and even if you did, even if by some wonder you managed to escape what would you do? how could you return knowing you had betrayed everything you ever stood for?

“scared to kill me after all?”

and again, dabi shook his head, looking at you almost like he was about to claim that you didn’t know him like you claimed to after all. “scared?” he repeated, tilting his head. “i’m practically dying to see you go up in flames”

with a sadistic smile on his lips he looked around, eyes halting when he looked above you, analyzing the terrible state the building was in. “who knows, maybe i’ll set the house on fire too”

“you’re cruel,” you spat, shaking in his hold again.

dabi wasn’t surprised to see you attempting to fight back, even though you knew the fight was lost. a true hero at heart after all, willing to do everything in their power and even more to protect innocent civilians.

“and yet you love me,” he stated, eyes turning back to you. “now tell me, isn’t that cruel too? loving a ruthless murderer?”

it was. you hated it and you hated yourself for it. he was a villain, a murderer just like he said, someone who actively fought against everything you stood for, someone who was about to kill you and yet you loved him.

“you’re pathetic,” dabi spat, throwing your weak body onto the ground. you groaned when you collided with the wet asphalt, pain shooting through your every limb. your chest moved fast with every shallow breath you took, trying to regain your composure and clearing your clouded senses.

meanwhile dabi crouched down beside you, feigning sympathy at your pained expression. he reached out, his fingers softly caressing your cheek before gripping your chin harshly and forcing you to look at him.

“guess that is goodbye,” he sighed, purposefully giving you a sad look, before a smirk adorned his dry lips. igniting the palm of his hand he pointed it towards you. “after all, i never liked it when anybody interrupted us during our fun times”

the villain stood up, looking down at you with a cold expression, his earlier smile nowhere in sight. “burn in hell, hero”

you closed your eyes for just a second, silently apologizing for the things you‘ve done and the things you failed to do.

you apologized to your friends and family for leaving them behind like this, knowing the only closure that they were going to get was that you were murdered in an alleyway, supposedly by none other than the infamous dabi.

you apologized to your fellow heroes, because you knew how hard it could be to lose another hero, a colleague, a friend.

you apologized to hawks for compromising not just your but also his image with the league, effectively ending his cover and endangering your mission.

you apologized the hero commission, disappointed in yourself for failing them.

you apologized to touya for hurting him, betraying him. you never wanted for it to get this far.

you apologized to everyone because no matter how you looked at it, you betrayed them — hero or villain.

and lastly, you apologized to yourself, wanting nothing more than being able to forgive yourself for your inner chaos.

and yet, you couldn’t help but just wonder about how things might have been if you hadn’t agreed to this. you could have prevented so much pain on every side, so much distrust, so much hurt, so many lies.

you wouldn’t have forgotten who you were, what you stood for and what your duty was. you wouldn’t even have considered not only retiring as a hero, but going underground, fleeing from every promise you ever made, escaping from your duty. and if all of this wasn’t enough, you weren’t even ashamed to admit that you wanted to to it with a villain.

leaving this society behind, leaving everything behind that made you who you were to live out the rest of your days with a person that was the embodiment of everything that was wrong with the system you protected.

“i’ll wait for you, touya”

shortly after, dabi turned his back to the now charred body on the dirty floor, closing his eyes as he lazily walked away. kicking a pebble away with force, he hushed around a corner, disappearing into the shadows as he heard the first terrified scream from the poor soul that came across what used to be a beloved pro hero.

the image of you smiling as you spoke his last words to him clouded his mind, not allowing him to think about anything else but you.

you betrayed the league, you betrayed him. you used him. you lied to him.

the villain huffed in disgust, clicking his tongue. of course he was happy that you wouldn’t be there to bother him anymore. you couldn’t lie to him anymore, you couldn’t use him anymore.

you couldn’t hurt him anymore.

dabi was glad that you were gone — dead — and he was more than elated that he was there to see you as your life force burned away. after all, you were nothing but a way to get information, a puppet he could use to achieve his dream one day. you were part of a corrupt system, a willing participant, that used their shiny imagine to lure people in and prevent them from seeing what a bunch of hypocrites was actually hiding behind it.

only a dead hero was a good hero.

the sound of dabi‘s fist clashing with the tough concrete wall disrupted the comfortable silence he was walking in. with dull eyes the villain looked at his bruised knuckles, his already bloodied skin now turning even darker.

but why did you have to be a hero?

reblogs are appreciated