#other than like being sick or getting surgery or smth but those are not good things

[the-kneesbees]

any band I like be in boston on my birthday challenge

[louiseleblancdiggory]

Speedy one night stand

Ok, so this is an old scene that i never posted because I never thought it was good enough, but since I wanted to post smth before ‘Tis the Damn Season, here it goes! I’m sorry for any typos, it’s 3 am and I don’t have the patience to proof read rn. There are mentions of a car accident but I swear it is not a sad or angsty scene. It’s bad and not at all a believable situation, but I hope it’s ok enough to be mildly enjoyable!

Aelin was having a spectacular day.

She had woken up around six, laying near the hottest man to ever walk on this Earth. In the previous night, she had drank enough to practically guarantee her a bitch hangover, but apparently her beautiful, silver-haired stranger had fucked it right out of her. A few times.

Not so proudly, Aelin sneaked out of his house without making a single sound. Maybe she should have stayed, maybe asked for his name. But she was also almost sure she had given him her number yesterday, and so if he wanted to continue things, he could call her. If not… Well, it had been a fun night.

Understatement of the fucking century.

And thanks to her stranger, once she got home, Aelin felt energized and inspired enough to finally give the painting a try.

The painting had become Aelin’s nightmare for the past year and a half. She had the idea, had the ability, but didn’t know how to do it, how to tackle it. She tried a few times every few days, and left the room hating it more and more. The painting started to be a mock to her abilities— she would finish other works, beautiful works, and yet the messy canvas would always stare at her from the corner of the room.

Aelin was mainly a sculptor, not a painter, and so she didn’t even know why it bothered her so much but it did. Oh, it most certainly did.

For the past eighteen months, staring at that taunting canvas was like staring at yourself on the mirror for too long. The vision started to blur, and it didn’t look real, evoked a deep panic.

For the past eighteen months, Aelin hated that fucking painting.

And yet, when she got home earlier, all she could think is that she might be able to finish it. The painting was supposed to be of Oakwald, a beautiful forest that extended for the whole expanse of the west of Terrasen. She hadn’t been at home for so long now, and all she wanted was a painting of how she remembered the forest to be. She wanted to capture its light, its life. She wanted it to look exactly how it was in her memory, but the colors never seemed right. Her fondness of the memory was becoming stained with that stupid canvas.

All she needed was the right palette.

And he had walked in a bar and sat by her side yesterday.

Her stranger was the literal embodiment of her memory, so much so that for a split second, Aelin had thought she had gone officially insane. His silver-grey hair was the exact shade of the sky on the cloudy mornings when she and her dad would go for a walk. Eyes a combination of a few shades of green and small specks of brown that reminded her of how the trees were. His demeanor was cold, and yet Aelin found him somehow so welcoming— just like she felt back at Oakwald, back home.

Her stranger had given her the thing she had needed for the past eighteen months, even if he hadn’t given her even his name.

Aelin was staring proudly at the now finished painting when the phone rang. She was glad her roommate wasn’t at home to witness her staring at the painting for that long like a crazy person, and honestly hoped it was Lysandra calling to ask if she wanted to go out and grab something to eat.

Or maybe it’s your stranger.

Aelin forced herself to shove every single spark of hope down until they were nothing more than cinders. To be honest, Aelin knew that she probably wouldn’t get a call from him. It was his first day in town, they both had been drunk, and, even though the sex had been great, her stranger didn’t seem like the dating type.

At least not the dating type with a woman who left his house unannounced at six in the morning after leaving him with no note other than her number that could potentially be wrong since said woman was already tipsy when she gave it to him.

A fucking shame.

“Hey.” Aelin said, putting the phone to her ear as she looked for her car keys. She wanted to be in the elevator by the time the word “eat” left Lys’s mouth.

“Is this Aelin?” A female voice she had never heard in her life asked, uncertainty and hesitation lacing every word.

Aelin withdrew the phone from her ear and looked at the unknown number.

Aelin rarely gave her phone number to strangers, and lately it had only been to…

Oh fucking shit.

He had a girlfriend?

Fuck fuck fuck.

“Hum, yes?” Aelin sounded as uncertain as the girl. “I’m sorry, but who is this?”

Maybe it wasn’t what she thought. Maybe she was wrong. Maybe—

“Do you know a Rowan?”

Well.

“Maybe?” Aelin wanted to bang her head against a wall. Almost seven months without touching a guy, and the first one in her way back to the land of the social people had a girlfriend. At least she knew his name now. Rowan seemed fitting, matched his appearance somehow. “Silver hair, green eyes, looks really pissed even when he’s sleeping?”

Please say no.

“Oh, yes.” The woman said, sounding… relieved? “I’m doctor Towers, and—“

“Doctor?” Aelin blurted out, all anger and nervousness being substituted for confusion. “Doctor?”

“Yes. Well, actually an intern since I’m still halfway through my first year here and—“

“I swear I mean no offense, but I am a little confused.” Aelin interrupted her after she started mumbling. “You’re Rowan’s girlfriend?”

“No!” The woman shouted loud enough that Aelin had to take the phone from her ear. “Gods, no. I thought you were his girlfriend.”

A moment of silence passed through the two women.

“What the fuck?” Was everything Aelin managed to say. She cleared her throat, mind trying to catch up with what was happening. “Why would you think that?”

“You’re the only contact on his phone.”

“I am?”

“You are.”

“I am.”

“You are.”

“I— Why are you calling me?” Aelin shook her head, her grip on her keys strong enough that started to be painful. She didn’t know if this was some type of joke her friends were pulling on her, or if Rowan was just some sick asshole that was fucking with her now that he had her number but she sure as hell wasn’t enjoying the experience.

“Well, you see.” She cleared her throat, voice tone becoming more serious, more professional. “Rowan was admitted into the Torre’s hospital a few hours ago. He was involved in an accident, and all the emergency contacts we could find are not in town as of now. I know it is not protocol, and I’m breaking so many rules here, but I went through his phone to see if I could find a contact of someone who was around. We didn’t know if his injuries were serious or not, but…”

Doctor Towers didn’t finish the sentence, and dread mixing with some type of anxiety started rolling inside Aelin’s stomach. “But?”

She didn’t respond the question, instead changing the subject. “You’re the only contact, Miss Aelin.”

Aelin slowly sat down, the dead silence of the apartment mixing with the expectant silence from Doctor Towers. She didn’t know the guy, didn’t even know his name until two minutes ago, and yet the image of the painting in the other room kept flashing in her mind, the colors in the canvas mixing with the colors she saw on his face. “I— Is he alive?”

“Yes, yes. He’s in surgery, I believe.” The initial apprehension came back to the woman’s voice. “I don’t know, actually. Again, just an intern. People don’t tell me much here.”

“And I suppose hiding somewhere after stealing a patient’s phone isn’t the best way to pick up on any information they might be sharing in the halls right now.” Aelin said, some amusement for the girl showing through her voice. “Where are you? Storage room?”

“Coma patient room.” Doctor Towers laughed nervously. “I thought I was helping.”

“It’s fine.” Aelin said even though she didn’t feel it.

The line went silent once more, and after a minute, Aelin said. “Well, bye, I guess.”

“Wait.” The doctor’s apprehensive voice sounded again. “Couldn’t you… Can you still come? Even if you’re just his friend?”

Aelin sat frozen on her chair. “I’m not his friend.”

“Oh.” She sounded disappointed. “Ok. Sorry. Have a great night, Miss Aelin.”

Before Aelin could respond, the call was ended.

—————

The first thing Rowan noticed when he opened his eyes was that he was not at the rented apartment he and the rest of his friends had gotten for the summer.

The lights were too white and too artificial, the bed too uncomfortable to be the same one he had slept the previous night.

And there was also the fact it felt as if he had been thrown from the top of a building, broken every single bone in the impact and, somehow, survived.

He tried opening his eyes a little bit more and acute pain shot to his brain.

Unfortunately. Unfortunately survived.

Shit, maybe he was in hell.

“I don’t know if the struggle is amusing or pathetic.” A low and sultry voice sounded from the left corner of the room. “Maybe try not staring directly into the light and then try opening your eyes.”

Rowan turned his head to where the soft voice had come from, pain burning his neck with the movement but he found himself incapable of not looking at her direction. But the woman was right, and Rowan managed to open his eyes enough to see her seating in one of those uncomfortable hospital chairs, legs crossed in front of her and fingers laced on top of her stomach.

Rowan mentally scratched his last thought. If he had actually died, that certainly was tilting a lot more towards heaven than hell even with the killing pain.

“Fuck, I think I died.” Rowan blurted out.

“I’ll pretend you just compared me to an angel, not to the devil.” She said, getting up and walking in his direction. Despite her hurt tone, she was smiling as she approached his bed. “It’s the least you could do after you ruined my perfectly perfect day. I was having a blast, you know?”

Hell, heaven, or Earth— it honestly didn’t fucking matter because the pain was the same, but her voice seemed to soothe his muscled, make the pain secondary to the pleasure of listening to her voice.

“Yeah?” Rowan rasped out, hoping she would continue talking.

“Oh, yeah.” She sat by the edge of the bed, straightening his sheets. The light wasn’t so blinding anymore, and he could see every detail on her face.

Heaven. Definitely heaven.

“I’m an artist, you know. Sculptor mostly, but I’m a decent painter. There’s this painting I’ve been trying to get done for over a year now, and today I did not only make progress I liked, but I also finished it. I thought today was going to be a terrible day, you know? Yesterday I found out my flight back home had been canceled and I would only be able to get another one by the end of summer, so I went to a bar and planned on getting drunk. Today was a day for tears and hangovers.”

“But?” Rowan asked automatically, all too focused on the woman sitting next to him.

She smiled, raising a hand to brush his hair from his face, fingers intertwining with the shoulder-length knots he most certainly had after whatever it was that had happened. She seemed too focused on her hand gently undoing the knots, but thankfully kept talking. “But I met this guy, you know? Definitely not from here, accent gave it away immediately. Also not from where I am from. Just that made him interesting enough. And,” she turned her eyes to him, eyes glinting with mischief. “Very, very fucking hot. That definitely made him even more interesting.”

“What a guy.” Rowan could feel some of the life coming back to his body, and even managed to weakly match the grin she had on her face.

“Oh, yes, what a guy. Fucked the hangover and artistic block right out of me. A hero, if you will.” Her grin extended into a smile, and she shook her head. “So imagine how ruined my day was when I got a call saying my amazing bar guy had been in a car accident.”

Rowan let out a broken laugh, his ribs screaming in pain when he did so. “So irresponsible of him.”

She assented solemnly. “And there I was, hoping he would have called me to go out on a date. I’m not picky but hospital is a huge downgrade from mind blowing sex in his expensive apartment.”

Rowan laughed again, not even caring about the pain.  “I’m sure the guy would have asked you if you hand’t left the expensive apartment at the crackass of dawn without telling him.”

“And instead of calling he let his car be smashed by a fucking truck to get my attention? Tsk, tsk, tsk… Maybe I didn’t dodge a bullet with this idiot.”

Rowan’s lips were taken by a grin. “Well it worked, didn’t it?”

“Next time try something a little less dramatic.” She said, eyes narrowing but Rowan could see how she was trying to contain a smile.

“The girl really seemed into dramatics tho. Gave it away last night when she—“

“Since I didn’t know your name until your doctor called me, Rowan, I’ll save you the embarrassment of asking mine.” She interrupted him, slender fingers going from his hair to the top of his lips. “I’m Aelin.”

“Aelin.” He said against the finger sushing him. “May I ask how you got here?”

She blushed a little, taking the finger from his mouth and straightening her spine. “I was the only contact in your list. They called me.”

“Lost my phone in the airport yesterday and had to buy a new one. Still doesn’t explain why you’re here.”

She narrowed her eyes at him, small nose frowning. “You’re very talkative for someone who could barely open his eyes a few minutes ago.”

“Am I?” Rowan said, hoping to push some of her buttons. Consciousness had been coming back slowly, and Rowan certainly remembered every single detail. Remembered being pissed by losing his phone, impatient because he would have to wait two more days for his friends to arrive.

Remembered all the pissy and impatience leaving his body once he sat on the bar by the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. She had been quick-mouthed, with no filter, and absolutely hypnotizing. She wasn’t just fucking beautiful, but also funny, smart, and had the ability to make him forget every single thing that was making him irritated.

And the rest of the night… It was a shame Rowan was bedridden, he certainly wouldn’t mind reenacting last night again.

And again. And again.

And again.

Rowan had wondered earlier if she had been that amazing because he was drunk. The answer was obviously no.

Aelin pursed her lips, red coloring her cheeks. She cleared her throat, rolling her eyes. “The doctor guilty tripped me.”

“Yeah?” Rowan knew he was smiling like an idiot.

“She said you were in surgery and she didn’t know how serious.” Aelin finally looked him straight in the eyes, and Rowan noticed how beautiful hers were. “No one deserves to have no one in this situation. She said your friends were out of town, and the girl sounded desperate enough that it sounded as if you were fucking died. Again, no one deserves to die alone. Specially someone this good in bed.”

It took Rowan a second to understand everything she had just said. When the last sentence finally registered on his brain, Rowan laughed. Aelin shook her head, a small smile appearing again.

“Also, you’re the first guy I slept with in seven months. Letting you die alone seemed like bad luck.”

“I am honored you put so much consideration into coming to stay with me.”

“Shut it.”

“If it makes you feel less embarrassed—“

“I’m not embarrassed.”

“I would have come too. Make sure my best fuck wasn’t dead.”

“Awn, best fuck? You’ll make me tear up like this, Ro. So romantic.” Aelin pretended to clean fake tears the moment the doctor in darker scrubs and a few on lighter ones entered the room.

“Good to see you awake, Mr Whitethorn.” The man smiled at him, checking his charts. “It’s always good to see wives crying of happiness rather than sadness around here.”

“Of course.” Rowan agreed, turning to Aelin and raising an eyebrow.

“They wouldn’t let me stay if I wasn’t family.” She whispered low enough so that only Rowan would hear. Her face slowly broke into a grin, and she winked at him before turning to the doctor. “So he’ll be fine, right, doctor?”

Rowan had to bite his cheeks from laughing at how obviously fake she sounded, but no one other than him noticed. “Yes, yes. Other than a fracture to his right wrist, your husband is completely fine. Some bruising and soreness that painkillers can help, but nothing major. You two are free to enjoy your vacations when he’s discharged tomorrow.”

“Oh, great.” Rowan said, nodding seriously. “My wife here has just informed me that a hospital is no adequate place for a first date.”

All the people in the room laughed, thinking Rowan meant their first date in Antica.

Not their first date ever.

“I’ll leave you two. Anything you need, ask a nurse and they will page me.” The doctor in darker scrubs said, leaving the room with all the ones in lighter scrubs following.

“Where do you live?” Rowan asked the moment the doctor was out.

Aelin turned to him, fingers going back to his silver hair. “Have been living here for the past two years in an art internship. Going back to Orynth, Terrasen by the end of the summer.” She curled a strand around her finger before looking to his face. “You?”

“Have been and will continue to be a very happy resident of Orynth.” Rowan said, a smirk appearing on his lips. “Definitely happier after the summer.”

“Haven’t even asked me out and you’re already thinking about the end of the summer.” Aelin shook her head and clicked her tongue even though she was smiling. “No surprise you got into a car accident, so speedy.”

His smirk grew into a smile. “My dear wife, would you like to go on a date with me?”

She narrowed her eyes, taking her sweet, sweet time to answer. “I’ll think about it.”

“And, seeing how the doctor talked about all my grave injuries—“

“Grave.” She snorted.

“Do I get kisses to feel better?” Rowan’s tone was full of mockery and some laughter.

“If I kiss every place you’re hurting after being hit by a fucking truck, I think we’d be here for a long while.”

“You didn’t complain yesterday.”

Aelin half laughed, half snorted. Rolling her eyes, she bent forward, and even though she was trying very hard not to, Rowan could see the start of a smile just before she pressed her lips against his. They were sweeter and softer than he remembered, and despite the pain on his arms and specially on his right wrist, Rowan raised his hands and put them in her golden strawberry hair.

“One more thing.” He said against her mouth.

“Has anyone ever told you that you ask for too much?” Aelin said impatiently.

“As our situation is already as fucking weird as it’s gonna get—“

“You don’t say!” Aelin said, voice dripping with so much fake surprise Rowan couldn’t stop but smirk up at her.

“As our situation is already as fucking weird as it’s gonna get,” he repeated forcefully, eyes narrowing at her as her smile widened. “Tomorrow, when my friends arrive.”

“Yes?”

“Can you please still pretend you’re my wife?”

Aelin stared at him blankly for a moment before letting out a full, lovely laugh. The bed shook with her laughter, and Rowan joined her— a little weakly due to the pain, but joined her nonetheless. She bent down to kiss him again, nodding as she did so. “Of course. What type of person would I be if I didn’t help such injured person find some happiness in their lives?”

Rowan kissed her back, fingers playing with her hair. “So this means you’ll go out with me?”

“We’ll see.”

.

.

.

.

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@in-love-with-caramel-macchiato @jlinez @courtofjurdan @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln @ladywitchling @lexflame @sleeping-and-books @annejulianneh111 @perseusannabeth @linshryver @mu-si-ca-l @camilamartinezdunne @dank-queen7 @minaidss @starborn-faerie-queen @booksofthemoon @loveofbooksandwine @jesstargaryenqueen @bluejaberry @multifandommessblog @yesdreamblog @superspiritfestival @ireallyshouldsleeprn @woollycat22 @julemmaes @claralady @abookishfreak @faerie-queen-fireheart @morganofthewildfire @queen-of-glass @heirofthenightcourt @booksbqueen @heirofthrnightcourt004 @fromthelibraryofemilyj @rowaelinismyotp

* if your name is in bold i cannot tag you

[potatotrash0]

Hey idk if youve done this alreadh but im curious about your body headcanons for the sdr2 cast!! An anon sent some in for characters previously (the one where they said things like angie has vitiligo and stuff-i love them and they really stuck with me haha) and i wanna know your headcanons!! :D

Hmhmm this one I might be listing off the spot lmao. I feel like my hcs are mostly just. Common hcs but hey I never said I wasn’t basic skdjksjdks

cw for. Everyone. Yeah kdjfksjdks

Hajime…..I like to think he’s slightly buff? Maybe that’s not the right word. Toned? Idk, I hc that he jumps around hobbies a lot because he wants to find something he’s good at, so that includes sports. I like the idea that a few stick with him, like swimming and basketball. I imagine he also has light scrapes and scars on his legs from falling, both with skateboarding and general Clumsy Shit.

Also this one switches a lot but with Trans Hajime, I can see him with top surgery scars.

Oh ah, I like freckled Hajime!! It’s cute. This one goes with the sports hc, but I like the idea that he’s kinda tanned. Entirely unrelated but I also like the idea that he has calluses from playing guitar.

Chiakiii!! She’s soft bc I said so. Specifically her thighs, arms and stomach + some stretch marks. And moles all over. Projecting big time onto a cute fictional girl, call that self care <333 /j

uhh other than that, I imagine she has bags under her eyes from staying up late gaming. Also tan Chiaki my love. Shh I know she probably doesn’t go outside for days on end. In my defense I tan easily and I imagine she does too. Again with the projection. Shhhh

Oh oh!!!! I forgot to mention but!!!! Chiaki gets a ton of moles. I saw the boob mole and went !!!!!! fellow mole haver!!!!!! and went nuts. This is the one weird niche entirely irrelevant thing that can get me to like a character, just. Being able to point at them and jump up and down with joy over them also having moles. Idk why it’s just therapeutic <33

Nagito’s bony. Skinny mf. Could probably cut cheese with his elbows. Maybe grate it on his collarbones. Cuddling with him would be a fight to see if you can find a position that doesn’t end with something poking you in the gut. I mean this affectionately, he’s bony as shit but he’s my bony fucker <3

Pale asf, sunburns if he’s in the sun for more than two minutes. His eye bags could hold the entirety of his life’s trauma. Sharpest features ever. Sometimes I hc that he looks greasy, and other times I hc that he looks ethereally pretty in a ghostly way. Either way he always looks like he’s had the soul sucked out of him by a Dementor.

You can probably definitely see the veins in his hands. They’re. Very There. Also I’ve brought this up before but he definitely has big ass hands. L a r g e hands, all the better to head pat you with. This was originally so much more pining but I decided no I’ve exposed myself enough on this blog skfjksjdkd

Oh last minute thing, I think he’d be tall as fuck. Specifically 6’0 or taller. Also he probably (definitely) has at least a few scars from his childhood, particularly that plane crash. And I like to think he has glasses when he’s older. I’m so sorry that his section is so long I have so many thoughts about him ;;;;;

Okay uhh Imposter? Mmm. Idk actually. I do think they’d have callused fingers but soft hands. Probably from having to adapt to using a ton of different talents for their Imposter Agenda. Also stretch marks probably, all over their body.

Teruteru uhhhhh. God. Can you tell I don’t think about some characters ;;;;; Idk I don’t have much that differs from canon. I like him. Oh but he probably has cook hands? Chef hands, whatever you wanna call them. Probably faint scars from cuts and burns from when he was still learning how to cook from his mama.

Mahiru……hmm well freckles obviously dkjfksjd. I think she’s tanned as well since I feel like she likes sunlit shots. Idk I don’t have much. I like to think she’s got a stockier body type though.

Also not necessarily her body but I like her with an undercut!

Peko’s buff <3 it’s canon <333 /j

N ee way yeah. Buff Peko my love. Also she probably has a few scars from handling her sword when she was younger and less experienced. I also feel like she would have contacts she wears when she trains bc fuck exercising with glasses

I don’t really have anything for Hiyoko until she gets her growth spurt. Afterwards, I imagine she’s tall and kinda thin? Mainly bc of fast metabolism probably, though when she’s older maybe she’d be a little less spindly.

I don’t know if her hair would be bleached or not, but if it were, I like the idea of her letting her actual hair color grow in. If not, I think Ibuki might help her try a few sections of dyed hair? Idk I just like the thought

Ibuki is a fellow bony bitch. I mean this lovingly. She’s skin and bone. Skeleton rocker lady

Probably tan, I imagine she spends a lot of time in the sun. She strikes me as a summer person. Oh, I also saw some art of Black Ibuki with vitiligo and loved that!! Also calluses from shredding guitar, obviously

Hmmm I like the idea that she rollerskates? So possibly some bruises or scars on her arms or legs from falling on concrete when she was still learning. Oh oh I imagine she has a ton of piercings!!! On her ears, nose, lips, brows, tongue, belly button…….maybe she has a split tongue too idk. Also she totally gets a ton of tattoos when she’s outta Hope’s Peak, prove me wrong.

Mikan uhhh. I like tall Mikan. She deserves the height. 5’8 to 6’0 Mikan good 👍

Hmm she probably has scars all over, particularly on her arms and legs. Uh. Idk I imagine she’s curvy probably. What do I say for her I don’t have anything skjdksjdks

I’m not even gonna lie I don’t have a damn thing for Nekomaru. Or. Wait nevermind here’s a concept: buff Nekomaru but like. If you’ve seen those wrestlers who have fat on them that hides some fucking crazy strength? Yeah that’s him. Also hairy asf.

Gundham……tall vampire vibes. I’d say he’s a stick but also I feel like he’s the slim type of muscular. Idk how to describe it. Shigaraki type muscle? Male gymnast. No nevermind those guys have visible muscle. Shigaraki type it is

Hmmm I think this is canon but probably a few scratches from his pets. His arms and legs mainly but I’m sure the Devas have scratched up his neck at some point or another. Just a little though. Also piercing fiend Gundham my beloved. I also like him having a couple tattoos when he’s older. Ibuki probably helped him heheh

I’m torn between Fuyuhiko being skinny as shit and Fuyuhiko being tiny and buff. I like both………hhh

His hair is probably bleached. Peko probably helps him re-dye it when his roots start growing in. I also like him having glasses

Uhhh tooth gap Fuyu’s cute. I used to have a super small one before I got my braces, I imagine it’s the same for him. Him, Ibuki, and Gundham are probably Tattoo Buds.

Kazuichi…..I want so bad to say he’s a weakling just to make fun of him but he’s a mechanic that probably works with heavy machine parts a lot and he probably has some sick biceps. But he probably also smells like hair dye, oil, metal, and Monster Energy. Win lose situation I guess.

I like to think he has a couple piercings? Not as many as Ibuki, but maybe he’s got like. Second or third place in the class. Also he totally filed his teeth to be sharp like that

Akane!! Buff lady, could probably deadlift me or something. She’s definitely got some scars from running around, especially when she was first learning parkour. Ummm oh, I like to think she has a chipped tooth or smth like that from falling roughly as a kid.

Soniaa <33 in my heart she will always be tall and have at least some muscle. Novoselic is a war country if I remember correctly, she’s definitely got some military training in her.

Idk why but her with heterochromia just popped into my head. That pretty greenish blue gray that she has + maybe brown or hazel? I think that’d be cool. And hip dips.

[bnhaficsforthesoul]

yoo, okay this is a bit of an angsty request but i NEED this !! essentially, the reader loves midoriya (or anyone of your choosing, really) yet its unrequited ^^ maybe a popular ship or smth is real in ur writing, like tododeku and reader is all "oh heckles, midoriya doesn't love me" and just,, sad stuff ?? maybe even a hanahaki disease au if you'd like!!! i want it as a n g s t y as possible with no happy ending jksdhgjdsghjdsjgk thank you sm ily

Of course I had to take the chance to write a hanahaki au - idk if this is angsty enough - im bad at angst lol, but here ya go anon

No - this couldn’t be happening. You didn’t love him, you couldn’t. But - the bloody flower petal in your hand spoke otherwise. You felt the world spiraling around you, yet you were frozen. 

Midoriya Izuku - your best friend who had stolen your heart and given his to another. Of course, there was no chance of Izuku returning your love, he was dating Shouto. You remember the excitement in his eyes when he first told you they were together - and the excitement you had reciprocated for your friend. If only you knew the suffering you would later go through because of him.

Of course, there is no knowing whether Izuku would have loved you if he wasn’t with Shouto - but it seemed the possibility was nonexistent at this point. So, you had 3 choices. You could muster up the money for surgery and lose all your feelings for Izuku, get lucky and make yourself fall out of love with him, or die. And right now, you desperately hoped you were lucky.

Quickly grabbing your phone off of its nightstand, you opened your messages, sighing softly at Izuku’s contact near the top of your messages, and found Momo. She’s vice class rep - so she’s probably the best person to ask to get your homework without getting scolded, and you texted her “I don’t think I’ll be able to make it to school tomorrow Momo, I’m feeling pretty sick. Could you tell me the homework so I don’t fall behind?”

It was late, so you didn’t expect a reply. But you didn’t need one - you weren’t going to school. If you weren’t around Izuku, maybe you would forget about your feelings for him and be cured. You were hoping, anyways.

You woke up the next day late in the afternoon - it’s not often you get to stay home from school -  to a text from Momo, saying “Oh no! I hope you feel better, I’ll send you the notes and homework after school. Get some rest!” You smiled at her kindness and laid back on your bed. But then, you noticed the other messages in your notifications. A few on the groupchat, with little “get betters” - which you were expecting. This class treats itself like a family, people are gonna worry if you’re sick. There were also more personal messages from Eijirou, Tenya, and - Shouto and Izuku. 

Shouto had also become a close friend of yours in the time you’ve known him, the two of you always being around Izuku allowed you to develop a bond yourself. So it was no surprise that he texted you, but all you felt was anger towards his “How are you feeling? Do you want me to bring you some soba? I’ll even warm it up for you.” There was a small twinge of guilt in your stomach, he obviously didn’t deserve your anger, but you couldn’t even spare him a response.

Then Izuku - how were you supposed to forget about your feelings when he was constantly so perfect? You found yourself smiling at his message, a “Good morning y/n! I hope you’re feeling better today! I’ll come by and check on you after I finish my homework :)” Sitting up, you went to respond - but you were interrupted by a sharp pain in your throat before you began coughing, and you covered your mouth with your hands only to feel the light touch of petals fall into them.

There were more than last night.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you stared at your hands once again. It hadn’t even been a full day, but already the flowers were growing rapidly. With shaky hands, you shook off the petals and returned your phone, quickly messaging “Don’t worry about me, I’m fine. You don’t need to come by either, I don’t want you getting sick and I’ll probably be sleeping.” 

The seriousness of your situation finally set in - last night you hadn’t seemed to fully grasp that if you didn’t do something to stop this, you would literally die. A few choked sobs escaped your lips, and you winced in pain. 

You roughly fell back down onto the bed - frantically wondering what to do. Would Recovery Girl be able to cure you? Would the disease go away if you just forgot about Izuku? You grabbed your phone and started searching for answers. Articles upon articles on the disease, talking about what the misfortunate people who contract it can do to save themselves. 

What you found was disappointing - there are no accounts of people being able to overcome the disease on their own, and always had to resort to surgery or death. You didn’t have the money for surgery, and you didn’t want to bring your friends into this and ask for help - but you didn’t want to die.

“What am I gonna do…” You threw your phone onto the bed and put your hands over your face, holding back your tears. As much as you simply wanted to avoid Izuku until you didn’t love him anymore, it was impossible. Sweet Izuku, who deems it his responsibility to be the most caring person on earth, would be devastated if you were to suddenly cut off ties with him. Besides, how could you when you were forced to see him everyday at school regardless. There was only so long you could feign being sick - you doubted the school wouldn’t do anything to help you. 

The rest of the week was spent in the comfort of your own room - you had managed to convince your friends that you were too sick for school, and for anyone to visit. Researching options had been your top priority, mainly what the surgery entails, but everything you found made you less and less optimistic. 

The surgery costs thousands of dollars, money that no average high school student would have - meaning unless you were to ask for help there would be no way to get the surgery in the first place. And even if you could, there were no certain results. With how rare Hanahaki is, there aren’t enough accounts of successful operations to rely on. Well - they all worked, those who got the surgery were alive. But some had results more drastic than others.

From the result you were hoping for - being you would simply lose feelings for Izuku and live on - to people who had completely forgotten about the person they loved all together. As much as you didn’t want to die, how would you live on without remembering Izuku? Your best friend. He’s been there for you through so much, the thought of living on without him was terrifying.

Yet, everyday you were reminded with the inevitable coming of your death. The itching in your lungs grew everyday, as did the amount of petals you were coughing out. It wouldn’t be long until your lungs were full of flowers - and you suffocated. 

----

“Y/n! Are you feeling better?” Eijirou smiled brightly at you as you walked into the classroom, and you returned a soft smile before sitting in your desk. “I guess.” All you could do was be optimistic, at least in front of your friends. After a week of practically being MIA, you decided you wouldn’t worry them anymore. Besides, if you waited any longer, you’d probably wake up to Katsuki blowing down your door with 15 people behind him. 

Everything was as normal, you talked with Denki and Mina as you waited for class to start, Katsu gave you a “look who finally decided to show up,” - which you knew meant he was glad you were okay - and you even managed to be happy when Izuku ran in and gave you a hug. Your smile strained when Shouto said hi to you however, both because you felt bad for having ignored his texts all week, and because you just didn’t want to be around him. At least not yet. 

Aizawa soon walked into class, and everyone hurried to their seats so that class could start. It wasn’t anything special today - just some more basic hero instruction, and you were happy that you could take it easy as to hopefully not trigger your coughing. You’d be able to tell him about it after class - maybe he could find a way to let you stay out of school until you figured this out.

Still - class was especially long today. Having not been present for a few days seemingly made the period feel much longer than it truly was. And just as luck would have it, an itch began to grow in the back of your throat, and you panicked. You didn’t want anyone else knowing - you didn’t want that kind of attention on you. To be the poor soul of 1A who might die 

You raised your hand, wanting to use the restroom as an excuse to get out of there.

“Yes, y/l/n?”

“Can I-”

Speaking apparently only made it worse, and before you could even finish your sentence you hunched over - beginning to cough up a multitude of flower petals. However, this time was a lot worse than the previous ones, your coughing not letting up until you were choking on petals - likely due to your forcing yourself not to cough for so long. Petals were overflowing from your hands as you attempted to cover your mouth, falling onto your desk and down to the ground. 

Everyone’s attention had already been on you, and with the surprised expression on Aizawa’s face as he ran over to you - they all saw the dark red blood dripping out of your hands and the soft pink petals blanketing your desk. Your attempt at hiding your sickness had only pushed it forward, and now there was nothing you could do. 

Aizawa rubbed your back until you calmed down, and you looked up from your hands to the horrified looks on your friends’ faces. Your face was covered in blood and tears - you looked a mess. 

“Let’s get you to Recovery Girl, okay? Can you stand?”

You nodded, but Aizawa still made sure to hold onto your arm just in case. The room was silent as he led you out, all eyes stuck on you. As you looked back - you were met with the wide eyes of Izuku, and you quickly looked away.

Aizawa had left right after dropping you off at Recovery Girl’s, ruffling your hair a bit and giving you a soft smile in an attempt to cheer you up. 

“Hanahaki disease… I don’t think I’ve ever seen this personally. I can’t promise I’ll be able to help you, but we can try.”

You sat on one of the beds as she walked around the room, grabbing a washcloth and wetting it before bringing it over to you. 

“You probably want to wash all the blood off.”

As you slowly rubbed the washcloth over your mouth, Recovery Girl grabbed your hand and kissed it. Normally, you’d immediately feel better. But other than the scratchy feeling in your throat - nothing changed. You could still feel the slowly growing flowers filling your lungs, they hadn’t gone away.

“How do you feel?”

“The flowers are still there… I can feel them.”

Recovery Girl sighed, “What about your throat? I’m sure all that coughing must have hurt - does your throat feel better?”

Nodding slowly, you felt tears forming in your eyes. So she couldn’t heal you.

“I’m sorry sweetie, I’ve tried all I can. All I can do is heal the physical damage - but no matter what I do, the flowers will keep growing. And if they keep increasing their growth at this rate, soon that won’t even be enough.” 

With all the luck you’ve been having lately, it wasn’t surprising that this was the outcome. But that didn’t mean you weren’t disappointed. Before you could let your emotions overcome you and start crying in front of her, you jumped off the bed and began making your way out. 

“Oh - I understand… thanks anyways.”

With a forced smile to Recovery Girl - who’s worried expression only served to make you feel worse -  you trudged out of her office and into the long hallway. 

“Y/n! Wait up! What happened?”

Izuku chased you down the hall as you left Recovery Girl’s office, a hopeful smile on his face. Apparently he had made his way down there as soon as class ended, wanting to make sure that you were okay. That smile disappeared as he saw your face, contorted in distress as a few tears escaped your eyes. “She wasn’t able to help you, was she?”

He took your silence as a no, but still tried to be optimistic, “Well, there has to be something we can do!”

With all the pain you were in, you’d think that your main worry would be yourself. But no - that hopeless look on Izuku’s face was where your worry had settled. He obviously felt that it was his duty to help you, even if there was nothing he could do.

“There’s surgery, and there’s dying.”

Izuku’s eyes glossed over and he grabbed your wrist, pulling you close.

“You gotta get the surgery y/n! Please - I don’t want you to die.”

If only he knew what he was asking of you. Would he tell you to get the surgery even if he knew he was the one you loved? Would he let you risk forgetting about him - and all the memories you had formed together?

“I don’t have that kind of money, Izuku. And I’m not going to bother anyone with my problem.”

His frown deepened, and his eyes shot around the floor as if he was looking for an answer, “But - I’m sure everyone would help out-”

“No - Izuku. I’ll figure it out. Don’t worry about it, please. It’s not your problem, it’s mine. Let me figure this out on my own.”

With your words, his grip on your wrist loosened in shock, and you used that as an opportunity to pull your hand away. 

“I’ll be fine Izuku, what ever happens, just let me figure it out.”

You left him standing there, worried and hurt as you ran back to your dorm room - just wanting to be alone to process the events of today.

----

A constant knocking at your door drew you awake. As soon as you arrived in your dorm, you found yourself especially drained of energy, and quickly fell asleep. You desperately wanted to just ignore the thumping, but whoever it was wasn’t going to let up, so you sighed and slowly sat up and made your way to the door.

“Shouto? What’s up?”

When you opened the door, you were surprised to see Shouto standing there. He asked if he could come in, and you reluctantly agreed. As soon as you closed the door, he started talking.

“Izuku told me about what happened. Are you really planning on doing this yourself?”

It was hard to read his expression. On one hand he looked worried, but the sharp look in his eyes proved his frustration.

“You’re really going to let yourself die - just so you don’t get anyone else involved?”

His sharp gaze made you feel almost ashamed, as if your decision was completely idiotic - although you supposed it was. But you couldn’t bring yourself to reply, you’ve already caused enough trouble as it is, you don’t want to make others fix your problem.

Shouto sighed and placed his hand on your shoulder, “I’m paying for your surgery. We’ll schedule it for this weekend, can you hold out for that long?”

Your eyes shot to his, the sharp look continuing to tell you he was serious. Even so, you gave him a light glare, crossing your arms as you replied, “What? No - you’re not! You heard it from Izuku, I’m not asking for anyone’s help.”

“Then you’ll die.”

That made you pause. It wasn’t like Shouto to be so blunt, at least not anymore, but he really was serious. 

“I - … I don’t know… I don’t know what I’ll do.”

“Y/n, let me do this. I know you don’t want my help, but I don’t want you to die. No one wants you to die, and you don’t want to die.”

He wasn’t going to take no for an answer, so with a heavy sigh you nodded, “Fine… but - I’ll owe you something. Anything.”

Shouto chuckled lightly at that, and nodded, finally taking his hand off your shoulder as he spoke “Deal. Actually, I know what I want. Hanahaki happens when you love someone that doesn’t love you, right? So - who do you love? I’m just curious.”

Fuck. Of course he would ask that. You forced a smile, “Ah - I don’t wanna talk about that… Isn’t there something else you could ask, or that I could do for you? There’s gotta be something.”

“I don’t have anything else in mind, this is all I wanna know right now. Are you embarrassed by who it is? Or is it me?”

He laughed when he mentioned himself, but he was still looking at you expectantly. If Shouto was anything, apparently it was persistent.

“If I tell you, you have to promise not to get upset.”

“I promise.”

With a deep breath, you looked at the ground and muttered, “Izuku.”

Shouto’s face fell from a soft smile to a painfully neutral expression. The room was silent, except for your slight coughing - all the talking had edged you closer to another coughing fit, and you wanted him out before it happened.

“I’ll call the doctor tomorrow.” Shouto walked to the door and opened it, but paused before he could walk out, “And don’t worry about it y/n. It’s not your fault, I’m not mad.” At that, he fully left, closing the door behind him and leaving you alone once again. At least he understood.

----

The school had allowed you to take the rest of the week off under the suggestion of Aizawa and Recovery Girl, not wanting a repeat of last time. This time, however, you weren’t allowed to stay holed up in your room, as the class forced you out after school to spend time with them. It was times like this that you really appreciated your friends - they would help comfort you when you started coughing up more flowers, and made it their mission to cheer you up. 

The weekend came soon, and Saturday morning you were met once again with Shouto knocking at your door. 

“Ready?”

Bouncing on your heels, you tried to relax your panicky brain. You’d be fine. The operation would go by smoothly, and you’ll be fine. Nothing to worry about.

“Yup! Let’s go.”

The trip there was fairly quiet, you were too busy thinking about the possible outcomes of the operation - and of Izuku. It would hurt to lose these feelings for him, as much as you hated them. To suddenly not love someone anymore sounded terrible. But, you’d still be friends - and that was all that mattered. 

It didn’t take too long to arrive at the hospital, only about a 30 minute train ride, and soon you were waiting in the doctor’s office to go back. It seemed it was a good day to get the surgery done too, as your breathing had gotten worse and worse by the day. You were nowhere near suffocating quite yet, but another week and you just might be.

“Y/l/n-san, you can come back now.”

You followed the nurse into the back room, Shouto following close behind you.

“So, you got Hanahaki disease, huh? That’s real unlucky, but at least there’s surgery. Now, you do understand that other than the removal of the flowers, we can’t be certain of the actual effect the surgery will have on you mentally.”

“I know, I’ve done a lot of research. Whatever happens, I’m ready.”

The nurse nodded, and smiled at you, “Alright - then just sit down right there and relax. I’ll be back in a minute, and we can get started.”

She left to grab the doctors, and you waited for them to return.

“Are you scared?”

“Just of the uncertainty. I know it’ll work, but I’ve read a bunch of articles on how the whole emotional process can go wrong.”

Shouto sat next to you on the bed, “Don’t worry, I’m sure it’ll go fine.”

It wasn’t too long until the doctors came back into the room, dressed and ready for surgery. Shouto was forced to leave the room, and he promised to be right there when you woke up. Once he was gone, the doctors finished their final preparations and the lead surgeon came to prepare you.

“I’m going to put you under now. Are you ready?”

You nodded shakily - both excited and scared to see what would come. 

“Alright, just relax. It’ll be over before you know it.”

He put the mask on your face, and your eyes fluttered shut into a deep sleep.

----

The doctor called Shouto in as soon as you woke up, wanting you to have a familiar face to help adjust while the anaesthesia worked its way out of your system.

“Everything seems to have gone great, the flowers are gone and they’ll live.”

Shouto thanked the doctor, and went into the room. You were still a bit dopey from the anesthesia however, so he let you be, wanting you to rest, and went to call Izuku.

“Shouto! How’d the surgery go? Is y/n okay?”

Shouto couldn’t help but chuckle at Izuku’s enthusiasm. Other than you, Izuku had been the most worried about the surgery - he wouldn’t be able to handle it if something went wrong and he lost you. 

“Yes, they’re okay. They’re still waking up, but once the doctor says it’s okay for visitors to come I’ll text you.”

“Ah! I’m so glad! Okay, I’ll bring everyone with me!”

It was a while later when you fully woke up, finally aware of what was going on as you looked around the white room. 

“Shouto? What time is it? Did the surgery go alright?”

“Around noon, and yes - you’re perfectly fine. Are you hungry? I can go grab you some food.”

You nodded, having not eaten all day, “Yes please. Oh, and could you grab me my phone? Momo said to call her after the surgery.”

Shouto went to grab your bag and began searching through it for your phone, but decided you’d want to know that your friends would be coming soon as well. 

“I’m sure she’ll be coming over soon, Izuku said he’s gonna bring everyone to come visit in a bit”

He expected for you to be happy at the news, but instead your face contorted in confusion, and to Shouto’s horror - you asked, “Who’s Izuku?”

---

As everyone from 1A flooded into the room, you broke out into a bright smile. They all circled around the bed, spouting random comments about how happy they were that you were okay and that the surgery was a success. You excitedly listened to all of them, happy to hear that your friends cared about you so much.

“Y/n! I’m so glad you’re okay! I was so worried!”

Izuku, finally being able to push his way through everyone and up to you, had latched himself onto you, throwing his arms around your shoulders and pulling you into a tight hug. However, you began pushing him off of you, not wanting some stranger to be touching you so closely.

“Uh, I’m sorry, but who are you?”

Izuku’s eyes widened as you said this - and everyone else in the room turned quiet. Your confused expression as you eyed him carefully further emphasized your seriousness. Why didn’t you remember him?

“I’m… I’m Izuku. Don’t you remember me?”

You gave him an overly kind smile, and Izuku had a glimpse of hope as you seemed to have a revelation, but instead, “Oh! You’re the person Shouto was talking to earlier! Nice to meet you!” 

You seemed to recognize everyone else in the room, as you happily turned to Denki who started telling you about something that happened at school to ease the tension. 

Confused, Izuku shakily grabbed his boyfriend’s hand - who’s pained expression worried him more - and pulled him to the corner of the room.

“Shouto… what happened? I thought you said the surgery worked.”

He was quiet for a moment, trying to decide how to word the news in a way that Izuku would understand, “Well… It did. Y/n’s cured. But - Hanahaki is such a rare occurrence, doctors don’t know all the technicalities of it yet. They can’t assure results, and sometimes, the patient ends up forgetting about the person they loved all together rather than just losing their feelings.”

Suddenly, Izuku went numb. That would have to mean - that meant you loved him. 

You loved him. 

It was his fault you went through all that pain. 

Flashes of you coughing up blood and petals in class flooded his brain - and the pain on your face as you looked at him - he caused that. And now, he couldn’t even apologize. You had no idea who he was.

“I’m sorry Izuku.”

He barely noticed as Shouto pulled him into his chest, and he cried softly. As he looked over Shouto’s shoulder, he saw you laughing happily with the others - a sight that should make him smile. 

But all he felt was pain - even though you were right there, he had lost you.