#otherwise curling up at the bottom of hades or nico's bed

[happyk44]

You know what? Jason buying himself an oversized dog cage, making it all pretty with fairy lights at the front, throwing a blanket over the top to make it dark, sliding in a thick sleeping bag and some soft sheets and a cozy blanket with 1 squishy pillow, and this is his bed now.

It feels better this way for some reason. The confined space is more comforting, he isn't as exposed as he would've been on the bed, sunlight doesn't wake him up from the windows, outside sounds are a little more muffled.

It's like his own personal den. Everyone knows better than to go inside, and if someone wants to crash in his cabin with him, then yeah, he'll bunk with them on the bed, but otherwise he prefers the private safety of his homemade den. It's his.

[significant-what]

pjo holiday gift exchange 2018

i am so very incredibly late with this and i apologize from the bottom of my heart. i don’t want to sound like i’m making excuses, but my 12 days of christmas -story took a lot on me, and after that i was in a kind of vegetative state when it comes to writing and couldn’t do anything.

still! hello, @rosyredlipstick i am your secret santa from @percyjackson-secretsanta! i am not dead! 

my gift to you is a short but sweet solangelo fic, sempiternal. i hope you enjoy it, even though it is so late. and hey, i personally think that getting christmas gifts late is super nice because they’re usually unexpected, don’t you?

you can find the fic from ao3 (link above) or under this cut.

”Nico? Are you asleep?”

Nico isn’t. He doubts he will be able to sleep at all. He’s cold, the sky is open above them, and the ground he’s lying on is hard and uneven. It’s hard to think that this is a problem now, when three years ago he could fall asleep anywhere and still keep one eye open for danger. Nico is used to luxury now, a warm bed and a roof above his head, the knowledge that the magical barriers of Camp Half-Blood will keep him safe even if he falls asleep.

”No.” Nico turns on his side inside his worn out sleeping bag and blinks his eyes open. The sky is clear and the moon full and bright, but it’s still dark enough that he can’t see Will’s face clearly, even from mere inches away. ”What is it?”

Nico sees movement and hears the rustle of fabric. Will’s hand finds Nico’s in the dark, their cold fingers lacing together even though Nico knows it’s be more practical to keep his hand inside the sleeping bag where it’s warm. His other hand is curled around the handle of his sword, just in case, but Will swears that they will be okay here. Nico wants to believe him.

”I just”, Will starts, then quiets down. He sounds different from how he sounds in daylight. Nico wonders if that’s because he can’t see Will, of of Will feels more vulnerable like this. ”I guess it’s a good thing it’s so dark ad you can’t see. I just want to say something, and I’m not sure I would be able to say it if I knew for sure you could see my face.”

Last week Will told Nico that apparently children of Hades can see better than average in the dark. Nico doesn’t know how Will knows this, but as Nico’s eyes adjust to the dark he can now see Will’s face, how his eyes are closed and there’s a wrinkle on the bridge of his nose, like there always is when Will thinks about something important. Nico doesn’t say anything, just twitches his hand in Will’s to let him know he’s listening, which results in a quick tug on Will’s lips.

Will doesn’t speak up right away. Nico listens to the silence, to the sound of Will’s breathing and the wind that swishes up in the trees, the insects crawling up the tree trunk not three feet away. This is something Nico has missed in the comfort of his cabin, the way silence isn’t quiet but alive with sounds of its own. Sometimes he feels so small and alone in the absolute silence of the empty Hades cabin. While Nico prefers the safety of Camp Half-Blood, the sounds of the real world provide their own security that Nico finds comfort in.

”This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot”, Will says. Nico is positive now that the difference in his voice is about vulnerability, because even though Nico can’t see anything past Will’s shoulder, he can see Will’s face clear as day. ”I didn’t – I don’t know if this is something that needs to be said but… I just want us to be on the same page, and I can’t be one hundred per cent sure unless I say this.” Nico watches as Will takes a deep breath and counts to five before releasing it. It’s a technique Will taught Nico what feels like eons ago but in truth is barely even three years. ”I want to make you happy, Nico.”

Nico swallows the gasp that wants to be let out and unconsciously tightens his hold on Will’s fingers. ”Will –”

”Please.” Will sounds like this is a difficult topic to talk about, which strikes Nico as odd because Will is talkative one, the one who talks about doubts and plans and feelings while Nico listens and barely manages to contribute. ”Let me talk, otherwise I might… not.”

Nico nods slightly, then realizes that Will can’t see with his eyes closed – wouldn’t probably see with them open, either. ”Okay.”

Will is the kind of person that says a lot without uttering a single word. He doesn’t say is, but as Nico watches he can see gratitude and fondness in every single one of Will’s features, from the tips of his fingers up to his hairline, hidden under a light grey beanie. There’s a curling lock of hair that moves against the bridge of Will’s nose with every breath he takes and that must be ticklish. Nico wants to tuck it away, but that would mean letting go of either Will’s hand or his sword, and neither is an option.

”I want to make you happy”, Will says again, ”because – because you make me happy, and making each other happy is something people do when they’re in love, right?” It’s astonishing how Will can find saying anything difficult when he can say that so easily. It takes Nico’s breath away. ”And we’ve been told our whole lives that demigod lives are often short and – and unhappy. But the world is changing and people like us can reach adulthood more often than not. We can make long term plans and know that reaching them is actually possible.”

Will opens his eyes, but Nico can tell that he still can’t see. A lone cloud moves, letting the moon cast a beautiful stripe of light across Will’s cheeks. For a son of the sun, he looks very good in the moonlight.

”I’ll be going to college in a few years.” Will has been talking about that a long time, almost as long as Nico has known him, so it’s not a surprise. Will wants to be a doctor. Nico thinks he’ll be an excellent one. ”And whatever it is you will want to do in your life, I’m sure it will take you outside of camp at some point. I just – I want us to – ” Words fail Will, it seems, and he closes his eyes again, shuts them tight like a little kid wishing on a shooting star. ”Even if life takes us to different places at a point, I want us to find a way back. I want to find us in a time and place where I can fall asleep like this every night and wake up to you every morning.”

Nico sometimes thinks he’s gotten used to Will’s romantic nature. Will is like that, he likes to make sure Nico and everyone around them knows exactly what’s up, does little everyday things he doesn’t have to, goes out of his way to make Nico feel loved, respected and taken care of. It’s a constant thing, and Nico thinks that at some point he will have immunity and won’t be as affected every time.

This is not that point yet. Nico can feel his heart hammering against his rib cage in a way that is almost painful, and the palms of his hands feel cold and clammy. The tip of his nose is still chilly in the night air, but the rest of his face feels burning hot, and he’s really glad that Will can’t see his blush even though Will has seen it a thousand times before.

”I want to be with you every day”, Will continues, seemingly perfectly unaware of how flustered he’s making Nico, and his voice is getting a little stronger now that he’s getting to the point. ”And I want to make you happy every day. I want you to be happy, and I want to be the thing that makes you happy, and – and that doesn’t have to make sense. I just. I guess I just wanted to make sure you know that.”

And Nico does know. On some level he thinks he has always known. Like Will said, it’s not something that necessarily needs saying, not with them. Will knows Nico better than anyone else, and Nico likes to think that he knows Will better than anyone, too.

For Will to voice these things like this, getting them out and leaving them floating in the air around them – for Nico, that’s a show of trust like nothing he’s experienced. As demigods, they’ve been taught since they were kids to trust each other with their lives, but this is something much bigger. This is Will trusting Nico with his heart and soul, and Nico feels overwhelmed with it, with how much it makes him feel. He isn’t sure how he’s ever going to be able to tell Will exactly what it means, what it does to Nico on so many levels.

Nico shuffles closer until their hands are pressed tight between their chests and their cold noses touch in the dark. He can see Will’s eyelids flutter and closes his own eyes. He thinks he gets it now, why Will wanted to say these things in the dark.

”I want to make you happy, too”, Nico whispers, wishing they were somewhere where he wouldn’t feel the need to sleep with one hand on a sword so that he would put his arms around Will instead. But for now, this will have to do.

(Five years later Nico will think back to this night when he stares at a blank paper in front of him on the table, cursing Will for wanting a traditional wedding ceremony with written vows as a personal touch. he will think about the way it felt like to promise to make another person happy, and he will smile before starting to write, because the promises he makes to Will in marriage are not new ones. They’re something sempiternal.)