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#parent issues
ivynightshade · 4 months
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fatima aamer bilal, from i mother it the absence of her, iii. i am not a person that can be loved for a very long time excerpt from moony moonless sky.
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sageandscorpiongrass · 6 months
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I think I hate my father.
The Sun is Also a Star, Nicola Yoon | Woodtangle, Mary Ruefle | pinterest comment | Anatomy of Cat and Dog Skeletons, William Cheselden (quote unknown) | Father, The Front Bottoms | I'm the Villian in his history., Nat (Oh Fathers, Key Ballah) | @/inkskinned on tumblr | Thomas Builds-the-Fire, Smoke Signals, Sherman Alexie | no children art print, Rainboon | Untitled, Franz Wright | Franz Kafka in a letter to his father | Seventeen Going Under, Sam Fender | Someday I'll Love Ocean Vuong, Ocean Vuong (from Night Sky With Exit Wounds)
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x3nshit · 9 months
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another shitty thing about being the eldest daughter who based her worth on academics and how useful she can be to others is that it physically hurts to ask for help even when we desperately need it. it's an internalized belief that we should we able to figure out everything on our own and it sucks
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silence-ofdeath · 1 year
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“I am alone with my own thoughts and it’s dangerous.”
-cress
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staltheoneandonly · 11 months
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i feel like there's a point being the oldest sibling where you stop being your parents' child and start being just some person who happens to live in the house
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mii-niya · 10 months
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bro kins mulan
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bonus:
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belphegorlance · 2 years
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Matilda by Harry Styles is for children who don’t have a good relationship with their mother(or father) and constantly feel like they need to be doing more. They can never express themsleves in front of their parents because they will be rebuked for it. They're constantly getting yelled at for no reason, always stressed, choke back their sobs and feel that they are a disappointment at all times.
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the feminine urge to make every sad song you listen to about your relationship with your mother
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vampireink · 8 months
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I will have a home one day. It will be warm, and it will be safe. It will have large windows so that it never feels like a prison. It will have comfort and light and colours, and there will be joy echoing off of each of the walls. There will be no shouting in my home. There will be no violence, no harsh words, no abuse ... it will be safe, and it will be my home.
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nanixo · 1 year
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Gotta love when they just randomly yell at you :)
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sqquidzz · 6 months
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"As Long as I'm Here, No One Can Hurt You."
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Sanemi x Child!Reader (PLATONIC RELATIONSHIP)
Summary: Sanemi had found you while he was on a mission chasing a demon, covered in the blood of your own family and crying in your house all alone. He decided to "adopt" you and give you a new home.
Tags: Fluff, slight gore in backstory, Sanemi is a good parent, trauma, PTSD, slight mentions of past abuse, soft Sanemi, protective Sanemi, Y/N reminds Sanemi of Genya, loss of parents, adopting, some sadness, swearing, insults (but Sanemi doesn't really mean it) etc.
A/N: Hello readers! I'm so sorry to those following me that I haven't posted as often as I probably should, I just got writers block and lost all my motivation and I forgot to post something for you guys. I hope this will make up for it. I have not written fluff yet, so I'm hoping you guys will have some improvements for me if there are any. And also, thank you to those who are following me, I really appreciate it! About the story now, PLEASE do NOT read this as a sexual relationship, this is only a PLATONIC relationship. But anyways, enjoy!
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"Get back here, you brat!"
Sanemi was currently chasing you around the house. After a long year of going on missions, Sanemi finally had a break day. Of course, meaning that he could spend that day taking care of you. And coming back to the scene before us, Sanemi swerves around tables and chairs, trying to get you to get back into your room. Oh, I almost forgot to mention, you were also wearing no clothes.
"Nanana Boo Boo!" you giggle as he dives to catch you, but you jump out of the way, blowing a raspberry at his face, snickering as you run away once again and hide, leaving Sanemi wheezing on the floor from chasing you around.
"You better get back into your room you piece of shit, or else I'll kill you!" Sanemi barks as he rises from the floor, getting up and dusting his pants before searching for you.
"Oi, you better not be fooling around my room you little fuck!" Sanemi yells as he searches your room and comes out empty handed.
However, as he approaches his room, he hears quiet sobs through the closed door. Now Sanemi is getting a little concerned.
"Y/N...?" he calls out gently as he opens the door, the door creaking slightly. He ends up finding you on the opposite side of his bed, curled up into a ball, face in your knees as you cry silently, sobs racking your small frame.
"Hey buddy... what's wrong?" Sanemi asks quietly as he reaches out to you with his hand. But immediately after his hand makes contact with your back, you flinch away, head shooting out of your knees as you look wildly around you as if your afraid the world is hunting you.
"Whoa, I'm not gonna hurt you, see?" Sanemi whispers and holds his hands out.
You slightly calm down at the gesture, but your expression is still wary, still feeling like Sanemi was tricking you.
"You wanna tell me why your crying?" Sanemi asks gently as he attempts to hold your hand again. This time, you don't flinch back, sniffling quietly as you stop crying.
"I- I got scared," you whisper out, "I knew you wouldn't hurt me.... but I couldn't help thinking about what they did to me."
Now Sanemi was confused. Who were you talking about? Who did what to you?
"What do you mean, pumpkin?" Sanemi asks. He always used pet names with you, sometimes they would be insulting, but most of the times, he would call you buddy, pumpkin, things like that that made you feel like he really cared.
"M-my parents used to do things to me," you sniffle, "They always said that it was for the best and I believed them for a while. But what they did hurt so much." You burry your face into your knees again, shoulders shaking from newly sprung tears.
Now Sanemi understood.
He had found you as a baby after your parents had been slaughtered in your house. He decided to take you in himself since he didn't want you to end up being an orphan forever or getting adopted by a bad family (bless his kind heart 😭)
However, he had never thought to ask about your past. He just assumed that you had grown up with a normal family that loved and cared for you. Oh how he was wrong.
"Y-your parents...?" Sanemi whispers as you continue to sob out of fear and grief that your parents had in fact abused you and had neglected your well-being entirely.
By now Sanemi was shaking with fury, but not at you. He was shocked. How could someone hurt someone so kind and joyful? How could they rob you of your happiness?
Sanemi took a deep breath. Now is not the time to get violent.
Instead of asking any further about your past, Sanemi simply wraps his arms around you in firm but loving embrace and you bury your head into his shoulder, letting out all of the tears that you held in for so long.
"It's okay Y/N. You safe with me. As long as I'm here, no one can hurt you," he coos, rubbing your back to sooth you and calm you.
After a few minutes, you calm down, finally running out of tears to shed and you fall asleep in Sanemi's warm embrace.
He smiles down at you, and as he gazes at you, a memory pops into his head
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"Nemi! Nemi!"
"W-what is it?" Sanemi asks, rubbing his eyes, clearing his vision to reveal Genya.
"Can I sleep with you tonight?" Genya asks nervously, "I had a nightmare and I'm really scared."
Sanemi blinks for a moment, then smiles softly and throws his blanket to the side.
"C'mere," Sanemi sighs, and Genya immediately jumps into his embrace, burying his face into his chest. "Don't worry Genya, as long as I'm hear, no one can hurt you.' (sound familiar?)
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A tear runs down Sanemi's cheek.
He hadn't realized until now how much you reminded him of Genya when he was younger. Cheerful, determined, kind. And especially the fact that you love to sleep. (pointer to those manga readers out there)
Sanemi picks you up in his arms, tucking you into bed and watches as you snuggle the blankets closer, savoring their warmth.
He slowly climbs into bed next to you as to not wake you up, and holding you close, he too, falls fast asleep.
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ivynightshade · 7 days
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[text id: i am too little, and too much, and never enough.]
fatima aamer bilal, excerpt from moony moonless sky’s ‘i am tired of making a religion out of my suffering’.
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greysfields · 9 months
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do you want kids? they ask me, good intentioned, smiling. how do I explain that my hands have already raised a child, have fed and clothed and bathed, have cleaned countless skinned knees? how do I explain that I was a child myself when I became a parent, determined to make up for the absence of the real thing? that being the eldest sibling doesn't just mean looking after them, it means bringing them up too, learning how to clean up after them and never knowing who you are without someone to take care of. I smile back. I'm not sure, I say. I haven't really thought about it.
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x3nshit · 11 months
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“you can’t heal in the same environment that made you sick”
i didn’t get this until someone put it into words. i’d never understand why i always felt better when i locked myself alone in my room rather than spending time with my toxic family. i never understood why i was bubbly and outgoing when i was with my friends but my energy was immediately drained the second i got home. i didn’t understand why regardless of the effort i put into healing i would keep getting triggered by people in my family. i never understood it until i read that sentence and it all just clicked. i can’t heal in an environment where the people are benefiting from my suffering. where the people don’t want to change the behaviour which affects me negatively.
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silence-ofdeath · 2 years
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daremna · 2 years
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When your parents say "she gets that from me😌" my brother in christ, get what from you, trauma?
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