#pleasantries is pretty cool

[good-beans]

this is so stupid but i always have fun imagining the milgram characters watching their own/others mvs and seeing their reactions, especially for MeMe

That’s not stupid at all, thank you so much for the ask!! It’s sooo interesting to think about! I planned on just posting this drabble, but the more I thought about it, the more I started jotting down headcanons for everyone 👀 Of course there’s the initial disbelief and shock that Milgram can really do what it claims, but once they accept that, they’d have a lot of interesting reactions…

Es gets to watch the video first, then the prisoners are free to watch their own in the privacy of the courtroom/extraction room/wherever. Other prisoners can watch them only with explicit permission from the video’s singer. No one is allowed to watch Undercover except for Es. At first they spend hours looking at those final frames of themself flinching from the camera, hoping to jog any sort of memories, but eventually they give up on it. While actually watching it, they don’t mind the murder silhouettes. While sleeping, however, it has triggered more than one nightmare.

Haruka: He thinks Weakness is very pretty – he’s amazed seeing himself on the screen and hearing his voice, knowing he’s not that good of a singer. Even before his innocent verdict, it gives him a huge surge of confidence. Once he gets to know the others better, he gives them mv permissions, then stares intently at their faces to see their reactions as they watch it. AKAA scares him a bit, seeing his own intense emotions on screen, and he only gives Muu permission to see it. When he’s alone, Haruka pauses the shots of his mother, just to stare for a while.

Yuno: Laughs at the symbolism her mind used in Umbilical. She’s never shied away from sexual words/thoughts, so it's funny the video was as tame as it was. She thinks the song is fun, and isn’t afraid to show the others and sing snippets of it around the prison. Some days it’s too emotional for her to get into it, but most of the time she tries to display a confident attitude about it. After Tear Drop, she’s satisfied with her anger and more overtly sexual images. If anything, she feels too exposed by the shots of herself looking more vulnerable/sad. 

Fuuta: He experiences a solid mix of embarrassment at the gaming theme in Bring it On and feeling a surge of pride that he looks badass in the knight’s armor. He’s worried the warden won’t take him seriously with the video game obsession, but he absolutely loves the song and thinks it portrays his toughness and ideals well. He’s less thrilled with Backdraft, everything about it unsettles and embarasses him. He’s thrown by the shot of crossing out his own silhouette – he’d had self-harming thoughts, but wasn’t quite ready to confront them so blatantly yet. Like Haruka, he can be caught pausing the arcade shot just for a moment before turning the whole thing off and storming away.

Muu: She has mixed emotions towards After Pain. She hates seeing herself look so weak and pathetic, but it gives her a lot of hope that her story will be understood. She misses her friends, and seeing them again is bittersweet. She closes her eyes at the moment of the stabbing – she’s only gotten the courage to watch it through her fingers once. She watches INMF once, then refuses to look at it again from shame/horror. Despite Haruka’s begging, she doesn’t let him watch it, either. 

Shidou: He asks Es what they saw in Throw Down. Upon finding out his family wasn’t in it, he chooses not to watch it. He believes he already knows all about his emotions and crime, so there’s no need to go through that pain again. He’s tempted to watch it when he’s confused about Es’ verdict, but still holds off. He does watch Triage when informed his family is in it. He spends hours in front of the screen by himself. Only after seeing that one does he watch Throw Down, though he’s still left confused about Es’ decisions.

Mahiru: Absolutely loves TIHTBILWY. She thinks it perfectly describes her situation, and that the song is very cute. She lets others watch it, and unlike Yuno, feels like singing it 24/7. It reminds her of her bf, and she thinks that’s very romantic. Similar to Shidou, she spends a lot of time watching I Love You just to look at her boyfriend. She shows it to everyone, just to show him off and talk about him, even if she does skip over the beginning and end each time.

Kazui: He is very similar to Shidou; he refuses to watch his videos until T2, assuming it would be too painful to watch something he already knows and wishes to avoid. Unlike Shidou, seeing Hinako is far too painful, and he regrets watching it and seeing her so happy on their wedding day. Though maybe he’s still waiting, and hasn’t seen any of the videos yet…

Amane: Magic makes her worry more than anything. She fears she’s poisoned by unnecessary vainness since so much of her video involves cute things, colors, outfits, animals, and is set up like a tv show. She’s also worried that Es and the others will really see her as a child because of how cute the whole thing is. She prevents herself from watching it too many times, but buried under all her fears, it gives her a surge of pride seeing herself so talented and pretty and the star of the show. Purge March only reaffirms her confidence in her crime – the video brings up some awful memories, but it shows her as a leader, a warrior, a hero! It brings her comfort and confidence more than anything.

Mikoto/John: The videos are distressing to both of them, and they spend all their time studying the others’ screentime. Mikoto watches in horror as John does things that line up with his spotty memories, and John panics seeing that his actions distress Mikoto more than they’ve reassured/saved him. John does end up watching his own scenes a few times – it feels incredibly good to appear in a way that Mikoto may finally notice him. He feels seen. Now, logically I think that MeMe would be the final tipping point in which Mikoto finally accepts the situation and his DID, but if I must stick to his canon denial, then I’d say he goes on a whole rant about movie magic andt the crazy things you can do with editing nowadays. He doesn’t have a good explanation on how Milgram found his home and knew so much about him, but he explains everything away as cgi or camera effects. Double manages to sway him a bit more, as he hears John speak so plainly to him. Just as the audience had some debate on who was apologizing at the end of Double, Mikoto and John wonder who is apologizing to whom. Though they both come to the conclusion it’s their own apology, they decide that if it was the others’, they’d accept it and forgive them.

Kotoko: She’s very pleased with Harrow, and is unashamed to show it to the others. Though she’d been able to watch a few of the previous prisoners’ videos, it still shakes her a bit when she realizes that Milgram really does have the tech to look deep inside her. She watches it just a few times – not obsessing over it, but not afraid either. Deep Cover, however, is a once-and-done sort of deal. She claims she’s not letting the others watch it because “they couldn’t handle such harsh but true criticisms about themselves,” but she doesn’t end up watching it anymore herself, either.

[drurrito]

Night Drive (18+)

Summary: You get a new car

AN: 18+ only y'all--we're gonna pretend that there are plenty of other self-driving cars that aren't t*sla...I hope this makes up for me not putting out another part of AYTO yet! All mistakes are mine.

Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Warnings: cursing; reader has a dick; dom//powerbottom!Natasha; sub//top!reader

----------------

You sink lower into your seat as you rev the engine of your new car with the widest grin Natasha can't see. Natasha looks hardly impressed from your view beyond the barely-legal tint of the windows.

You decide to roll down your window and plead your case.

"Hey baby."

Natasha rolls her eyes. You already screw yourself coming right out the gate with pleasantries, Natasha knows you're desperate to get on her good side when you do that.

"So...what do you think?" You vaguely gesture to the rest of the car and Natasha scoffs.

"I think you were a finance bro in your past life," she crosses her arms, and you relent, "probably," you sing as you round the car to lean against the hood. The gun metal gray still holds a shine in the moonlight. This wasn't an impulse purchase, you had been talking about buying a new car for a while now. You would go on little rants about the specs of certain cars whenever you saw them on the road or on TV. It's not like you were waiting when you had the money, being an avenger was a pretty-paying gig. You were just waiting for the right one, at the right time--a method you mastered by the time Natasha came around.

"Wanna go for a joyride?" You offer, already leaning off the hood and spinning the key in your hand.

Natasha wants to keep giving you a hard time, but you look so damn good in front of your sleek, expensive, new backdrop. Your muscles bulge under your fitted black shirt, and you have the cockiest smile on your face, like you knew you were winning this race.

"And if we get pulled over?"

"With SHIELD plates? I'm not worried about it," it almost comes out like it's scripted. You're not above rehearsing a speech for Natasha if it means getting your way. You're pulling out all the stops, but Natasha wants to remind you who's really behind the wheel. Her eyes rake over you slowly, intensely--the same way fresh lava travels over earth. You're standing at attention and you don't even know it.

"You gonna open the door for me or just stand there like you forgot your manners?" Natasha watches in amusement as you fumble for the door handle. She slides onto the cool leather while you make your way into the driver's seat yet again. You wait patiently for her to get comfortable and buckle in.

It's only when you rev the engine with a wink that Natasha muses this might have been a bad idea on her part. You punch the gas pedal and she's quickly acquainted with the back of the cherry red bucket seat.

----------------

Natasha decides that she doesn't like going fast unless the fate of the world depends on it. She also decides this is the one exception when she sees the freeway system of veins in your forearms as you grip the steering wheel. Natasha feels like she's flying when she watches your triceps flex while you turn the wheel or do something as mundane as turning on her seat heater.

Natasha slides her seatbelt off in a way that doesn't set off the sensor--she didn't want this moment to be ruined by a lecture on why it's important to buckle-up. You're too distracted by the beat of your night drive playlist to notice her crawling closer to you.

You feel her lips on the shell of your ear, "eyes on the road, got it?"

"Yes ma'am," you try to say cooly, you don't dare chance a look over at her. She hums with satisfaction and rewards you with a kiss on the skin behind your ear and a nibble on your lobe that tightens the coil in your belly.

Natasha sucks and licks at your neck while her deft fingers work to undo your belt and zipper. Her hand explores the border of your waistband before dipping under and finding what it was looking for. You let out a whisper of a gasp when Natasha admires your full length and girth. Your grip on the wheel tightens, Natasha chuckles when she hears the leather under your fingers groan.

Natasha begins to stroke you slowly, agonizingly so, but that doesn't keep your hips from bucking up into her hand.

"Tash," that only elicits a rumble against your neck. Natasha's other hand curls around your neck and gives a light squeeze that makes your vision blur for a second. Her stroking picks up speed, you have to work impossibly hard to keep your foot off the brakes.

"Natasha, please."

"I like the way you say please, baby," she mumbles with your skin between her teeth.

"What did I tell you?"

"Eyes on the road, ma'am," you say with a quickness that makes the corner of her lips curl up in satisfaction.

"So smart," she praises before you helplessly watch her head lower until you feel her lips greet your cock with a sloppy kiss. You throw your head back against your seat with a pathetic moan.

"So desperate," Natasha teases, and your mind feels like it's going a million miles an hour--multitasking is usually your strong suit, but it seems damn near impossible now.

Natasha's tongue travels the length of you, your hips feebly buck into her mouth when she finally grants you entrance. You slow your speed to safely take a hand off the wheel and hold her hair back. She thanks you with a gentle squeeze on your thigh and the prettiest sounds you could have only ever imagined.

Your playlist is already repeating itself by the time Natasha comes up for air. She can barely hear it over your panting anyway. You're rock hard and right where she wants you.

"The car can drive itself, you know," you breathe out. Natasha's brow quirks with curiosity.

"Show me," it's a gentle command, but your fingers rush to press the right sequence of buttons. You ease the seat back with haste, and Natasha just lets you sit there for a few beats to take you in and also leave you in suspense.

Your fingers dumbly flex against your legs while you wait for further instruction from Natasha. She doesn't even try to hide her smirk when your eyes begin to dart between the road and her.

"You're not gonna let us crash right, dove?" Natasha's finger traces a feather-light trail down your arm. It's a genuine question, even though she knows you probably did some sizable research on the safety features of the car before you even entertained buying it.

"No ma'am, you're precious cargo," you give an easy smile and that's Natasha's cue to move and straddle your lap. You help her with your hands on her hips, your hands quickly retreating to your sides when she's situated over you.

Natasha swears your eyes are sparkling as you watch her slide her panties to the side with one hand and take your length in the other.

"Eyes on me, baby, just for a second," she coos and you obey. Natasha can't help but admire the striations of your muscles working overtime to restrain yourself. You've always been intoxicatingly obedient, even when it's downright painful. Your eyes are locked on Natasha's, you have to bite your lip to stifle a moan when she finally eases down onto your cock. She's already working her hips in a way that has your entire body buzzing. You can count on one hand how many cars have passed you by this whole time, just like you expected.

Your fingers dig into the leather of your seat, your eyes periodically glancing at the road to make sure it hasn't veered off course for whatever reason. Natasha steals a few sloppy kisses when she leans into you to get a better angle and bounce on your cock at a speed that should be illegal.

"Tash, I'm gonna-," you choke out between labored breaths.

"What was that baby?" she leans back and oh god, you wish you had the kind of self-control your car has right now. You feel like you're going to pass out watching Natasha ride your cock, you're too blissed out to realize that she's spelling out 'm-i-n-e-' with her hips.

"I'm gonna come so fast."

"I know baby."

That seals your fate. Your arm reaches back to brace yourself against the seat. With a long and drawn-out "fuck," Natasha feels you push deeper into her, filling her up with every last drop of you. You both fall into a sweaty, moaning heap against the seat. Your body trembling with aftershocks as Natasha scratches at the skin on the back of your neck. You only get to drink this feeling in for a few seconds until you see red and blue flashing lights in your rearview mirror.

"Shit," you sit up and Natasha freezes when she sees what you see. You feverishly check your speedometer, you're not speeding. You start rifling through your brain to see if you forgot to do something, insurance? Plates? Registration?

Your questions are answered when you watch the cop car speed off into the night. Natasha lets out a heavy sigh of relief that makes your dick twitch, reminding you both that you're still inside of her.

"Told you," you try not to sound so exasperated. Natasha just rolls her eyes before kissing your temple. Night drives might just become a regular thing now.

[blockedbykei]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐈𝐒 𝐂𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 (𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐋𝐄𝐓 𝐈𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇)

🏐 — tsukishima kei x f!reader

— synopsis: something about the stars has always intrigued tsukishima, how even in the dusk of the night, the brighest star would light up the world and burn itself in the process. he also didn't know what to do when that star had turned into the person who seemed to make his days just a little bit better.

— warnings: nothing much, except angst. just soft yet also mean tsukishima who doesn't know what to do with those feelings of his. maybe he's a little ooc. based on "andromeda" by weyes blood.

stars, so miniscule, so far away from his touch, so beautiful even with the stygian waters that it swims on.

every night, after practice, tsukishima would walk his lethargic body home with his headphones in his ears, his neck bent backwards it could snap. but he didn't care, he wanted to watch the stars move and follow him.

he wanted to watch all the dead stars who shined the brightest, the stars that had turned into supernovas, the stars that are created. and he felt at peace— the soft rhythm and reverb of the song humming in his ears, and the stars that lead him home.

and occasionally, adding to his visual and auditory senses, a sweet drink on the palate of his tongue made his evenings better.

tonight was no different.

he had just bid his goodbye to his teammates, although timidly and without masking that annoyance he'd always bore against the little tangerine boy who always had a little too much energy.

tsukishima begins his journey, using the stars as his map, putting his hands in his pockets. yamaguchi hadn't joined him for tonight. actually, he hasn't joined him in a while, always walking yachi home, using her "safety" as an excuse (it really was the reason, but obviously there was another one).

still, he didn't mind the absence of his friend.

anri's soft doo-wop brings pleasantries in his ears as the song begins. his fingers tap inside the pocket of his gym shorts. he looks up at the night sky and connects his own constellations. tsukishima wonders if those stars ever know that they're being admired by millions of people in this planet, even if they'd died billions of years ago.

as a child, he used to think that the stars were the meteors that had killed his beloved dinosaurs. and every night, he would refuse to look up. but then akiteru, despite finding humor in his little brother's childish belief, had decided to tell him the difference between meteors and stars. and then added more information about those stars.

so now tsukishima loved three things: dinosaurs, strawberry shortcake, and stars.

his feet patter softly on the cobblestone that serves as a pathway to his home, the cool air drying the sweat off his temples and cooling his back, which reminds him to wipe his sweat when he gets home before he showers to avoid getting sick.

and then he suddenly comes in contact with a small body.

just outside of sakanoshita market, tsukishima's chest bursts in sudden (but light) pain from the person's elbow. and that person had emit a small noise of surprise and pain, stumbling backwards.

tsukishima was just about to snap, tell the person to look where they had been going and call them an idiot when his eyes met yours.

they're wide, irises darkened from the night's haze, and you're clutching your elbow, headphones askew. you rub the soft skin, a small pout on your lips and tsukishima wonders how painful was it for you to pout like this.

then you look at him and he feels the air stuck in his throat.

pretty.

"oh! sorry. i didn't mean to bump into you." you bow in front of him, hands pliant at your sides. tsukishima's at lost for words, lips only parted and looking at you. he still hasn't said anything when you bring yourself back up again.

"it's- it's okay." he finally stammers out, pausing his music and moving his headphones off from one ear. "sorry for not looking either." tsukishima bows slightly, just tilting the top half of his body.

you smile lightly at him, hanging your own headphones around your neck, scanning his figure. he suddenly feels shy under your curious gaze, watching as you read the print on the left side of his chest.

"karasuno...? ka-karasuno! i go there," you laugh lightly, like that discovery was the greatest news you'd ever heard. "i don't think i've seen you around. well, maybe because i'm new. i'm such a dumbass."

though the last sentence being a whisper, tsukishima contradicts: "n-no. i haven't seen you around either." he takes one step forward towards you, didn't expect himself to be nearer than he'd planned. "tsukishima kei."

you tell him yours in a polite manner, with a smile so bright you'd beat the stars that hover both of your bodies. "you're part of the volleyball club, aren't you?"

he hopes you don't see his wavering blush in the dim lights. "yes."

"cool! what position?"

"middle blocker."

"that's so cool," you face him, neck bent upwards to meet his eyes, hands forming into excited fists in front of you, like how hinata would get enthusiastic about something. "you're really tall. i bet, i mean if you could, you'd hit the streetlights when you jump."

that theory piques his curiosity. his eyebrows raise. "i haven't given it a thought. i will try it soon though." tsukishima finally removes his headphones and leaves them around his neck. he points to the bag in her hands. "what'd you buy?"

"chocolate milk. ukai-chan is your coach, right?"

"how'd you know?"

"i see him enter the gym everyday after classes. he owns this store," your head motions behind you. "can you tell him his mom is a little mean? i actually preferred it when he was watching over the store."

tsukishima smiles a little. "can't. he's our coach. he might actually drop us for his store."

your laugh may be brighter than anything else in existence.

"okay, well, see you around tsukishima-san." you smile at him, the pearls of your teeth glinting in the moonlight, the whiskers of your eyes denote the glee you've obtained from him and tsukishima softens just a little. you wave at him and walk past him.

he turns around, and even though your back was to him, his hand lifts and waves at you.

tsukishima walks home happier than he expected, a small smile lingering on his face.

🏐 —

"who you looking for, tsukki?"

yamaguchi serves his friend a teasing smile, holding the tray carefully in his hands. tsukishima looks down at his friend and deadpans:

"shut up, yamaguchi."

"sorry tsukki."

they sit down on the table hinata and kageyama sit on, the two bantering quite loudly on which flavored milk was the best and is advisable to increase their energy. kageyama says: "banana, you dumbass."

hinata argues that: "it's chocolate! it makes people hyper for a reason. could you watch your language?!"

tsukishima and yamaguchi sit beside each other, their backs to the window of the cafeteria, which meant that tsukishima has a view of the entire room, his height being an advantage despite the large crowds.

he blindly brings his bento out of his box, his eyes never leaving the heedless crowd. yamaguchi, ever the curious, most specifically the friend who always wondered what it is that ran through tsukishima's mind, asked again: "seriously, tsukki, who are you looking for?"

tsukishima huffs. "just sawamura-san. i need a-advice. on my blocks." the lie slips easily off his tongue that yamaguchi can't decide between believing him or forcing the truth out of him.

but tsukishima is slightly disappointed that even after five minutes, he still can't see the color of your hair amidst the throng of students. though his face might say otherwise (rbf), he can't help but feel a little sad.

maybe the star isn't shining so bright today.

he pokes and prods at the vegetables placed on top of his rice, stabbing the carrot and shoving it in his frowning mouth. he doesn't notice that hinata has been observing– no, looking at him. because hinata was never the type of person who could be discreet.

"stingyshima, you look sad," he doesn't know if it's a tease or not, but maybe it is. "is he looking for someone, yamaguchi?"

"i don't know," he shrugs. "he says he's looking for sawamura-san."

"he's right there," kageyama jabs his finger behind him, seeing daichi in line for the cafeteria food. "your blocks haven't been good? figured."

"sorry if i haven't lived up to your standards, king." tsukishima sneers. yamaguchi and hinata laugh, kageyama burning in his seat.

eating his lunch ended quite faster than he thought it would, and soon he finds himself walking along the hallway of the school building waiting for the remaining free time to end. so his boredom drags his feet towards the nearest vending machine.

the device on his ears blocked out all the haze and noise of the world, which left him in his own environment. it eased the nerves that trickled along his veins, rubbed the tension off his shoulders. in his own milieu, he could think whatever and say whatever and do whatever.

just like how stars form themselves however they please, explode and die whenever they want to. tsukishima didn't have better knowledge of stars than he knew of dinosaurs, but it was his own thought and he had the freedom to think whatever it is (although of course, with just a little bit of accuracy and validity).

tsukishima's eyes scan the plastic divisions for the sight of any strawberry drinks. when they land on one, he types the number and slips the cash in. the conveyor belts begin to twist.

but much to his dismay, when the drink was pushed, it never fell.

he tuts in frustration, his head falling backwards to release a tired, irritated sigh.

and then you pop up beside him.

tsukishima jumps lightly when he sees you put your head out and smile at him, clutching his heaving chest. somehow, your laugh had managed to drown out the song in his ears; he doesn't mind though. he thinks your smile was the most beautiful orchestra ever conducted.

he puts his headphones around his neck. "they're incredibly annoying, aren't they?" you smile up at him. "here, i'll help you."

suddenly, you begin to violently shake the vending machine. tsukishima almost feels embarrassed for you, but the lack of audience has rid that feeling. you, with your height, looked like a child angrily throwing a tantrum and had transferred your anger towards an object.

nonetheless, adorable.

finally, the strawberry drink fell down, and you squat to pick it up from the port to give it to him. tsukishima takes it from you and says: "thank you."

"no problem!" you beam at him. "i was actually looking for you earlier. i couldn't see you. did you eat at your classroom?"

tsukishima removes the plastic of his straw. "no. i was at the cafeteria." he doesn't want to admit he's looking for you too, but he hopes you can see it in his eyes.

(you don't. to you, he looked uninterested and entertained at the same time. very hard to read)

"aw, alright. well, i was just wondering if you'd like to, uh, switch emails?" you're shy and he finds it amusing. "not switch like i use yours and you use mine, but switch like i take yours and you take mine... so we could text each other..."

he wants to say that he knows, he's not dumb. but you– your eager eyes of softness look up at him and he forgets how to be so cruel and cold. like you were the kind of fire to melt the falling snowflakes. tsukishima nods.

"sure." he pulls his phone out with one hand from his pocket and hands it to you. you take it and give your phone to him, and it felt smaller in his hands.

when you exchange phones again, there's shyness written across your face. tsukishima can't help but blush with the way the sun kisses your skin the way it would to tainted windows– radiating colors so beautiful he can't help but simply be at awe towards you.

a star is created somewhere far away. tsukishima's heart skips a beat.

"i was actually looking for you, too. earlier." he admits, putting his phone back in his pocket. "i couldn't see you. sorry."

"don't be sorry!" there goes that smile again, always making his heart flip. "we both struggled anyway."

"do you want anything?" he points to the vending machine. "chocolate? banana? strawberry?"

"can i try yours first?"

tsukishima pauses, the straw in his mouth just finishing his sip. there's innocence in your eyes that riles him up the wall in ludicrous ways. he slowly takes the straw out between his lips and hands it to you, with you greedily taking it from him before his hand met you halfway.

he swears he could've been redder than any other person in the world when you so shamelessly put his straw in your mouth.

should i be worried about the germs or the fact that we kind of just kissed but not really?

when you sip, you swallow and he can see your brain ponder on what decision you were going to make. you hand it back to him and say: "yeah, i like that one, too."

how could you act like you didn't just drink from his straw?

tsukishima gets you one, this time without shaking the vending machine and hands it to you.

"thank you." you say, your smile adding to your gratitude.

though it seems as if time has reached its end and a familiar sound rings across the hallway that reminds the both of you that the free time was over. tsukishima sees your pout but you don't directly show it to him.

"well, see you around, tsukishima!" you wave goodbye to him, walking away.

tsukishima stands still, staying at his place. his drink was no longer cold, the condensation dripping down his fingers.

somehow, the colors are brighter, the drink was sweeter, the tension from his body had disappeared, and everything else felt lighter. and even if you were no longer standing in his proximity, that luster you left behind etched itself to him.

you were now his new environment.

🏐 —

you. hi tsukishima! 3:13pm

when his phone dings, he places his waterbottle to his side, tuning out the sound of squeaking shoes and bouncing balls. he sees your name on the screen. he doesn't hesitate to text back.

tsukishima. Hi. 3:13pm

his palms sweat from simply typing that greeting. but his heart seems to beat faster and his chest feels light. he didn't expect that you'd text right away. nevertheless, he feels elated to see you text him.

you. didnt see u at the gates earlier during dismissal, do u have training today? 3:15pm

tsukishima. Yes. 3:15pm

you. oh really? until what time? 3:18pm

tsukishima. 7. 3:18pm

you. okay! thats kind of tiring haha. 3:20pm

tsukishima. It is. 3:20pm

he winces at the possible tone he may deliver, so he adds:

tsukishima. Haha. 3:20pm

"bruh, you text so lame."

it seems that tanaka had been peaking over his shoulder as the conversation ensued. tsukishima hugs his phone to his chest and glares at him. "that's invasion of privacy."

"and that's how to lose a girl," he points at his phone. "you text like you're so uninterested."

yamaguchi looks at the two. "who's tsukki texting?"

"some girl named, uh,–"

"no one." tsukishima snaps. "no one."

"oh, it must be the one tsukishima was looking for earlier," hinata runs– or skips towards them. "stingyshima flirting? i wonder how you look like. i'm smart, but i won't tell you that i'm a smartass because i wanna impress you with my blocking skills. i'm so cool and so tall."

tsukishima hates how hinata mimics him. he bites back. "oh, i'm hinata. i'm so small."

much to his dismay, even sugawara had joined in. "you could tell her that, you know, i'm so tired. but i'm drinking water so that's good enough for me already."

he responds with respect, though dripping his annoyance. "sugawara-san, please don't mimic me."

his phone vibrates again, and everyone else leans in to look. tsukishima snarls and moves away from them, clutching his dear phone to his chest.

you. any chance we could drink later? 3:27pm

you. not alcohol, of course. just milk or juice, or a shake, even yogurt. although, we can't drink yogurt... 3:27pm

tsukishima feels yamaguchi peer over his shoulder, and he knows its him because of that distinct smell of his. he doesn't hide the phone away even when yamaguchi says: "she's asking you out! go!"

"calm down, yamaguchi."

he shakily types his response.

tsukishima. Sure. By the store again? 3:27pm

three dots, he's awaiting for your response.

you. okay! see you there :) 3:28pm

🏐 —

his practice ends at 7 on the dot. tsukishima has never left faster in his life.

though he was always the first to leave, bidding them goodbye before walking his way home. this was different– his goodbye bore that sense of urgency with a twinge of excitement as he clumsily slipped his regular shoes on, walking as fast as he could away from the school campus.

coach ukai had actually offered that they go back to the store together, but tsukishima was in a rush.

it was an eight minute walk to the store. he got there in five.

you were no longer wearing your school uniform. you had your hands at your sides, rocking back in forth from the heels of your feet, your headphones bobbing along with your head as you listened to your song. tsukishima wonders how he would approach you.

a tap on the shoulder? yell your name? appear in front of you? should he turn you around violently and smile awkwardly? should he–

"tsukishima-san!"

he didn't realize that he had spaced out, blinking. you approach tsukishima as you discard your headphones to hang them around your neck, stopping just a few friendly feet from him.

"how was practice?" you pip. "you look exhausted."

tsukishima reddens. "i'm alright. same practice anyway," he rubs the back of his neck. "should we go inside? i'm thirsty."

he hopes he doesn't sound too demanding. but you reacted normally, gave him a pretty smile, and led your way towards the store.

coach ukai's mother sat behind the counter, sporting the same cigarette in her mouth, a garbled greeting escaping her without bothering to look up as she read her newspaper. you and tsukishima find your way to the back where the drinks are.

he opens the door for you, the appliance bulb casting a white glow over your face as you bent and searched for what drink made your veins twitch with excitement.

"by the way, you know yachi hitoka?" you balance your hands on your knees, looking up at him. "she's your manager right? i'm in her class!"

"really?" he queries, swallowing thickly. "you're really smart, then. it's one of the higher classes."

"i try," you shrug shyly, looking back at the selection of drinks. "anyway, i asked her about you. she said that you were a middle blocker, 6 foot something, and that she liked your friend yamaguchi? i don't know, she said it then she denied it."

"oh, she likes him alright," he chuckles. "he walks her home every night."

"really?!" you pick up two cans of coke and clutch them to your chest, standing upwards. tsukishima shyly reaches for another strawberry drink. "i'm mad at her for not telling me that."

you make your way to the front with tsukishima following behind you. you place the contents on the counter, the woman behind muttering something you can't discern as she scanned your orders.

"are you allowed to stay out a little longer?" you ask him, the soft beeps of the drinks grazing his ears. he shrugs again, reaching for his wallet.

"yeah, sure. do you want to do something?" he places the payment on the counter before you were able to take your own cash out. you pout.

"i was going to pay for mine."

"it's alright. it wasn't that expensive, anyway." he smiles a little at you. and it was the first time tsukishima had ever smiled kindly at anyone, except yamaguchi, his mom, and akiteru. "you were saying?"

you pop open your can. "i found this really nice spot where you can stargaze. and, honestly, i'm bored and tomorrow's the weekend. i would have invited you to do this tomorrow, but we're here now!"

he laughs through his nose. "i'm free anytime."

when you both approach the exit, coach ukai and the team stand by the open doors. tsukishima stops on his tracks, his mouth parted the slighest as you tip your head back to drink your soda. when your head comes back in place, your eyes settle on the crowd upon you.

"oh, hello ukai-san!"

tsukishima looks at you through his peripherals before darting his eyes back front. they all snicker, eyes widened at the sight in front of them— cold, narcissistic, mean tsukishima kei, with probably the nicest girl in all of karasuno. yachi waves at you.

"is that why you were rushing to get out, tsukishima?" ukai teases, a cigarette hanging loosely off his lips. "i see you've met my number 1 customer."

he blushes when he's exposed, and he ignores the way you give him a surprised glance.

"so you must be the girl he was texting earlier," tanaka approaches you, offers his hand. "forgive him. he sounds lame when he texts, but trust me if you saw his face he looked like–"

"tanaka-san." tsukishima almost pleads.

while shaking his hand, yachi approaches you with yamaguchi behind her. "this is why you asked me about him!"

"shut up, yachi."

tsukishima could die right then and there. melt into a puddle of sweat and embarrassment. there were words exchanged between you and his ever loving team, the heat on his face becoming hotter and hotter at every second.

he wishes he could leave now.

by the time hinata begins to ask you a question about tsukishima's attitude, he sighs loudly. "excuse us, but we have to head out now."

you look at him again. "we do?"

"yes, we do," he looks down at you. "you told me, remember?"

you smile at him, recollecting your invitation. "oh, yes! we should get going."

you offer your goodbyes to the curious group. tsukishima wallows in discomfort, walking away with his shoulders slightly slumped and a hand in his pocket.

"i like them," you tell him, drinking your coke. "they're nice."

"they're really not," he takes a sip of his drink. "if you hung out with them, you'd be just as annoyed as i was."

his "joke" makes you laugh. first he thinks what could be so funny about his comment, then he realizes you don't actually know that he wasn't joking. the thought makes him swoon just a little.

"so why stargazing?" his and your feet are synchronized, stepping on the uneven cobblestone to the destination that tsukishima still doesn't know. your shoulder is closed to his when you walk; he resists the urge to put his hand out so that they'd graze your fingers, feeling the heat rub on his calloused skin.

"yesterday, when you walked home, i looked back and saw you look up at the sky," you reply. "and i realized that "oh, he stargazes too!" so i decided to bring you to my spot."

"your spot?" you hum in agreement. "why?"

"because it's nice to share the feeling of looking up at beautiful stars." you throw your now empty can onto a nearby bin, opening your second one. "i figured maybe you might feel the same way i do."

if it was admiration then yes, he felt the same way you did.

🏐 —

tsukishima realizes the walk was 10 minutes away from his home. now you're both standing at a hill where you can see all the houses nearby and karasuno at the other side.

you sit down on the ground, he copies you. his bottom sits on the soft soil, his fingers prickled by the grass, and the cold smell of the meadow enters his nostrils.

he thinks that everything is happening a little too fast – he had only met you yesterday, exchanged emails earlier, went out to buy drinks, and now you're both sitting at a hill stargazing like it's a date. your optimism and kindness shakes him a little, leaving him with an unknown thought of what he could possibly do as of this moment.

yet he's still here, watching you gaze at the stars, the sheer glow of the moon kissing your cheeks, the stars reflecting off the mosaic of your eyes. you're radiating this cordial heat that wraps around his right arm that rests just millimeters away from you.

"told you it's pretty," you beam, lips parted, never sparing him a glance. "you see that? that's cassiopea right there."

you point to the sky and squint, and it's only then tsukishima takes his eyes off you and follow the direction of your fingerprint.

you trace the invisible strings that connect each star to one another. blearily, his imagination turns those strings into silver. tsukishima draws nearer towards you, his shoulder now bumping yours, his pinkie grazing the skin of your finger.

"andromeda isn't here yet. but it's the one i've been waiting for the most," you turn your head to look at him.

tsukishima's breath hitches when he realizes that he may have underestimated how close the proximity he had created was, your breath fanning his face. he senses your surprise, the way the bottom of your eyes twitch lightly and your nose scrunches a little.

"i figure maybe they arive in a few weeks," he murmurs. he can sense your surprise and says: "you're not the only one who knows about stars."

"yeah? figured you were more into dinosaurs."

"that's true," he sniffles, you giggle. "when i was a kid i thought that the stars were the ones who killed the dinosaurs. so every night, when i see them, i would always cry 'cause i thought that they might fall here and kill us all."

"pessimist, huh?" when your head tilts up, your chin bumps his shoulder. "anything else i should know about you?"

"there's one thing i want to tell you but i've been making it plainly obvious."

"you have a knack for strawberries."

"yes," he smiles a little, the whites of his teeth appearing between his thin lips. "i like music."

"so do i."

"yeah? what genre?"

"...anri..."

"really?" tsukishima's eyes brighten, maybe even brighter than the stars. "i like her music."

"i thought you were kind of a japanese rock kind of guy."

"i can be many things," you look back up to the sky, your eyes darting between each individual star like you're tracing another constellation. tsukishima's tracing the features of your face like it was his constellation.

"yachi says you're mean, but in a way that brings up the team's drive to play harder," you say into the wind. "please don't be mean to me. i cry easily."

tsukishima wonders if he can even smile more than he is now. "i'll try my best. you're giving me a lot of reasons to be mean right now."

"but you're not being mean to me right now," you poke his glasses and shove them to his face, hurting the bridge of his nose. albeit tsukishima doesn't mutter a single complaint. "you're just being dorky."

"i am not!" he balances his body with one hand behind him, the other tugging on the end of your hair.

"now you're just being childish!"

your laugh beats out all the songs he had to search for to complete every single of his playlists. it was as soft as silk, as dulcet as violins; it was something he'd play on repeat when it played on his headphones. and your sweet laughed matched the way your face became even more beautiful.

tsukishima feels his heart beat a little bit faster.

a star explodes. supernova.

he no longer feels wearied from practice, his body languid from comfort in your presence. and just like last night, he was happy his day ended with something that lacked the usual bothersome feeling in his chest, but something that decompressed every constraint muscle in his body and think of something else that made the corner of his lips smile and his heart elated.

that's why when he went back home, when his mother and akiteru (who was visiting) were dead asleep, he silently descended to his room with a smile on his face, brushed his teeth with the sound of your laugh echoing in his ears, changed his clothes with your scent somehow lingering, and went to be thinking about you.

🏐 —

the past few weeks were more eventful than the days he had to train for the inter-high preliminaries.

the more he saw you, the more he felt himself unwinding like a diurnal motion, every trust and rigor travelling through his veins whenever your aura touched his opalescent skin.

you were the succor to his weary bones. you were the happiness that he never truly found in others. you were the light brighter than the stars could ever give him in the dark.

secrets were passed the way notes would in classes.

you got a sweet tooth? what dessert do you like?

strawberry shortcake, tsukishima said. no regrets, no embarrassment. pure adoration.

did you know that velociraptors aren't actually that big?

yeah? how'd you know that, tsukishima?

it's called reading, he'd roll his eyes. you're in the highest class and you don't read?

his retorts were never used to add insult to injury. that's what he liked about you– you knew when he was serious and when he wasn't despite the fact that tsukishima believed that he was hard to read. it seemed like you were able to read him better than yamaguchi has.

his heart aches at the thought. the ache, painful but so good, but something that he could not discern the true intention.

but he could never let you in him. never in his life.

you. saw a frog and it looked like you. loser. 12:51pm

you and tsukishima had exchanged countless of texts that contained topics that he never expected himself to be indulging in. that familiar ding! of his phone reminded him of you already, because you'd been the only one who constantly texted him more than yamaguchi has.

(also because, well, he set up a different tone for you.)

tsukishima sees your name pop up in a rectangular notification on his screen. he opens it with sweaty hands and a towel over his head, his thumbs typing out a snarky reply.

tsukishima. How could a frog look like me, (y/n)? That's dumb. 12:51pm

he ruffles his towel over his damp curls, the sweat on his temples being sucked into the cloth. he watches the three bubbles appear on your side and you say:

you. because i said so. look! 12:52pm

the attached image looked far from what tsukishima looks like. it was a regular frog, beside a pond, with no thoughts. he rolls his eyes.

tsukishima. I don't see it. 12:53pm

you. thats because youre not LOOKING. do u see his eyes? literally you. i think its the mouth, haha 12:54pm

he laughs either way despite not having seen any similarities. but laughing seemed to be a mistake, as he forgot where he was at the moment.

"quit laughing, tsukishima. you'll slack off," kageyama taunts from afar, face etched into an arrogant smirk. yamaguchi approaches him, peeking over tsukishima's shoulder to snoop on the conversation.

"are you worried i'll ruin your game, king?" tsukishima rubs the back of his neck, tilting his chin upwards. "my apologies."

you send him another text: omw there to see u :p 12:59pm

the latter's growl was overpowered by yamaguchi's hum of interest. "tsukki, that frog does look like you."

"yamaguchi, how nosy are you?"

"nosy enough to ask when will you tell her that you like her?"

tsukishima's eyebrows furrow. he did not like you. during those weeks, the both of you did more than just exchange texts in any time of day– often you'd meet after classes and buy a drink when he didn't have practice; sometimes you'd wait for him until seven in the evening so you'd both go up the hill again and talk mindlessly about things that tickled your brains.

in those few weeks, he had learned more about himself than he ever had with anyone else.

and he feels, though never actually given any attention to, that his days ended with a smile on his face rather than feeling boredom creeping up his shoulder like a grim reaper would on a dying soul.

instead, it felt like he was resurrected; tsukishima felt like a shooting star falling through evening, the fire pulsing through his veins as he fell. with you, he felt like everything else had color, that everything else made sense.

his life became brighter that it seemed like hinata's hair was actually on fire from the bright orange hues.

so no, he did not like you.

"i don't like her." he wipes the sweat that dripped onto his glasses. "don't be ridiculous."

"yesterday, when you were eating, you kept talking about how this (y/n) girl told you how the dinosaurs from jurassic park were created. and all of us were talking about one piece."

"so? it's way more interesting."

"but not her?"

"yamaguchi," he bemoans. "nothing is interesting about her."

that lie. that sickeningly, macabre, heartbreaking lie that it even hurt him to say it. tsukishima also doesn't understand why yamaguchi has a horrified face plastered on him, but he realizes he wasn't looking at his friend, and was looking behind him.

he whips his head around.

the tips of your shoes had mud on them from the dampened soil. your umbrella hung loosely around your wrist and dripped on the ground. your fingers clasped around a small contained with what seemed to be strawberry shortcaked that looked delectable enough to make his stomach hurt. and your chest heaved from what he assumed was the aftermath of rapid walking.

despite the sight that had made his head spin, the affliction that twitched from your frowning lips and the gloss that made your eyes shine from dejection had turned the situation into something so monotone he feels like his soul had just left life.

a star dies in the middle of the galaxy.

tsukishima thinks the regret plastered on his face may be seen. he hopes that it is.

the sound of squeaking shoes and ricocheting balls continue, but the ringing of his ears are louder. you swallow thickly, shuffling on your feet, and approach him hesitantly like he'd burn you if you were near him.

"i brought you this because you looked so pale yesterday after you practiced," you say softly, though he could hear the pain in your tone. tsukishima takes the container from your reaching hand, and swears he sees your breath hitch when his fingers graze yours.

"thank you–"

"see you around, tsukishima," you bow, before you hurriedly leave the gymnasium.

it felt like the room was shrinking rapidly on him, his muscles pressing in on his body in a suffocating manner. yamaguchi puts his hand on tsukishima's shoulder, leaning down to check in on his distraught friend.

"tsukki," his eyebrows are raised in concern, voice loud enough to snap tsukishima out of his pity daze but low enough that everybody else remained distracted. "hey..."

"i'm fine," he looks up at him. "it's nothing. i'm- i'm fine. let's just go back to practice."

his fists clench when he shoves the cake into his bag and walks back into the court. his blocks are futile when he thinks of your eyes. his serves hit the net when he thinks of the frown pasted on your lips. and he feels himself at the bottom of the game when another star dies.

he just doesn't know if it was his or yours. could a heart break two times?

🏐 –

tsukishima had a crisp trepidation towards the true veneer of love.

he believes he was too young for that, that he was in a stage where he would have this deep passion for things that were alive albeit something that he can't touch nor interconnect with– hense is unfathomable love for dinosaurs, stars, and strawberry shortcake.

so whatever it is that he was feeling for you – he doesn't know if it's love. tsukishima feels like he could die if he didn't see you for a single day; his feet and his body restless up until you both meet after practice.

tsukishima is even more restless now.

there wasn't a single text from you since 12:59 in the afternoon.

there was almost a hundred texts from tsukishima since 3:00pm, the time he had excused himself early from his practice.

he lays on his bed, his headphones on but no music. he wasn't in the mood to put himself up in brighter spirits. his back rests uncomfortably on the thick mattress, his curls splayed across his pillow, a hand on his chest and a hand holding a fork, his feet spread apart.

and the strawberry shortcake you gave him rests on his chest, half eaten, his mouth chewing sadly on the sweet delicacy.

"do you think stars have thoughts?" you asked. tsukishima found this beguiling and preposterous simultaneously, however the curiosity that happened to lift his lips into a dazed smile made him release a teasing retort:

"you certainly don't."

you threw a grape at him. he caught it with an open mouth. the sun was about to set, but the warmth was enough to prevent the both of you from shivering idiotically on the hill at the cold breeze. "i'm approaching an epiphany, asshole."

your vulgarity made him smile more. "celestial bodies, more specifically stars, do not have thoughts. but they're alive, and they function into a cycle."

"unorthodox minds like mine go out of the box," you rolled your eyes. "sorry, i'll put it in simpler terms so you could understand. i have a very creative mind."

"oh yeah?" tsukishima tilted his head sideways to present his interest. "and what'd you mean by that?"

"you know how stars die and create themselves?" you queried. "it's like how phoenixes rise from the ashes as they're reborn. but when a star resurrects, they're called "zombie stars," right?"

"yeah."

"and i'm not saying that they have a mind of their own, but if you were to input your own thoughts into a star, then yeah, it's like they resurrect themselves to live on with life over and over again, and don't you think that's exhausting? they're like dead stars, and they still shine brightly, and it's ironic, right? because something that has been dead billions of years ago still shine. it has a meaning into it that people just... completely ignore."

"so an analogy?" his eyebrow raised.

"yeah, something like that," you licked your lips. "when you see a bright star, and you don't know if it's a dead star. but imagine stargazing and finding love in something that has been dead long ago."

tsukishima's body softened. "uhuh."

"but what if you keep loving that star? and that star just receives so much of that love that they're able to resurrect themselves. well, obviously loving a star isn't actually gonna bring it back to life because there's a separate scientific explanation for that, but i'm saying that– that if you love something, or someone, hard enough that you're able to bring light into their lives, then that's possible.

and they take all that love for the benefit of their life and... they burst into something beautiful called supernovas."

tsukishima stared at you, his gaze ever so adoringly. "and what's the point of this epiphany of yours?"

"that loving someone that has been gone inside their body is possible to save them and bring them back to life to turn them into someone even more beautiful."

tsukishima sits back up, a whiplash from the quick commotion.

it was already night when his thin curtains were tainted black from the dark glow of the evening.

he pushes himself off his bed, slip his way out of his home and clumsily puts his shoes on to find you.

and he knows exactly where you are.

so it's no surprise when he sees you all alone, laying down on the meadow of the hill, blooming flowers grazing your cheeks in any way the wind blows. tsukishima stands and stares at you longingly, his fingers twitching beside him.

"(y/n)."

he says your name like an oath to the stars. you sit up, hearing his voice, cheeks dry with tears melting onto your skin. tsukishima's heart breaks the slightest when he brings himself up the hill.

"what are you doing here?" you ask him, voice so small he'd think you were whispering.

to his surprise, tsukishima falls onto his knees in front of you. he finds it endearing that despite the reduce of his height, you still look up at him. then he takes your hands into his, his thumbs tracing every ridge of your knuckles, looking deep into your eyes.

"i didn't mean what i said." he declares like he was under jurisdiction of the judge. "you are–... the most interesting woman in the world. the most beguiling, the most entrusting, the most beautiful."

your eyebrows furrow, hands shaking in his grasp. "what are you saying?"

"that i'm an asshole." he admits. "you are so interesting that every epiphany of yours pulls me back on the ground and into you. that epiphany you had about dead stars that resurrect themselves from getting so much love? shit, (y/n), that may be me."

you let out a tiny gasp, maybe a breath of reliefz his face is so close to yours, his knees in between your legs, bumping the side of your thighs. "what?"

"i–... i don't know if you love me. you don't have to. but you've made my days brighter and gave my life meaning that i felt like i was resurrected. like all the pieces in me were brought back together. and everything else just felt... alive."

finally, you smile. just a little, but it was enough to make the grass greener and the color of your shirt turn pastel, your eyes vibrant in the night. "yeah?"

"yeah," he laughs, idiotically he may add. "i like you. i like you so much. i like you more than i like dinosaurs."

you guffaw, throwing your head back, hands never letting go.

a star resurrects. a supernova explodes.

"i like you more," you say, looking up at him through your eyelashes.

it was enough for him to jump on you to press his lips on your awaiting mouth, gently pressing you down on the grass, his hand on the back of your head to soften the blow as he settles himself in between your legs.

his mouth, sweet with strawberries and ardor, his hair soft like flowers when your fingers tangle on the golden locks, his glasses pressing against the space between your eyebrows and the bridge of your nose, his tongue that hovers respectfully on top of your bottom lip.

innocent, lips full of solicitude, he kisses you deeper and with care, his head tilting to open his mouth the slightest so that he could get closer to you. the small sound that emits from your mouth makes him pull back and smile shyly.

his eyes had the galaxies reflected off his eyes that it made space seem like they were golden from his irises. you take his glasses off, placing them beside you, and let your hands rest on his face; tucking his hair behind his ear as you do so.

and above your intertwined bodies, andromeda swims across the stygian night sky, traced by invisible strings. just as tsukishima predicted.

tsukishima could stare at you for the rest of his life.

tsukishima loved four things: dinosaurs, strawberry shortcake, stars, and most especially:

you.

reblogs and feedback are appreciated!

[pupyuj]

[cw: dubcon, exhibitionism methinks?, fingering, degradation, humiliation]

well hello! i’ve been gone a while, yes but FEAR NOT you will never get rid of me (unfortunately) 😈😈 have a mean girl wony (completely different from “magic words” wony btw!) drabble for an appetizer tee hee 😋

campus princess wony who never fucking batted an eyelash towards her suitors, even the decent ones, but could never get over how you of all things never once looked at her the way everybody does?? every time you walked past her in the hallways without sparing her ass a glance, she was seething 😭😭 but she would never—and i mean never—go out of her way to make you notice her, nope! she was going to make you obsessed with her in the most organic-but-a-bit-flawed way possible! and her best friend’s small slumber party was the best opportunity to do all that 😈

being invited by mutual friends, you showed up in the most loser fit ever that wony almost wondered why the fuck she was so interested until she watched the way you scrunched your nose to raise your glasses—so fucking cute, wony was actually mad that you gave her butterflies 😭 but even in a small group, you still refused to acknowledge her! it was unbelievable; usually people would kill to be in your place, to be that close physically with her but noooo, apparently you were some hotter shit 😒😒

wony has had the luxury of watching you this entire night… you were so cool and laid-back, you got along with everyone pretty well (except wonyoung), but you were somewhat reserved… you intrigued wonyoung, but she had to save the pleasantries and introductions later bcs holy fuck she needed to hear that pretty voice of yours whimper and moan for her 😳😳 eventually she didn’t care that you were completely ignoring her bcs all she wanted at this point was to fuck you senseless,, that oughta get your attention…

wony following you into one of the bedrooms to get some extra pillows and blankets,, saying that she was there to help until she grabbed you and pressed your up against the door,,

“what the hell are you doing?!”

“do me a favor and shut up.”

her putting one of your wrists behind your waist and pinning the other to the door as she grinds against your ass, nose up in your hair and then leaving soft kisses down the side of your neck… “w-wonyoung, what the fuck?! let me go! a-ah.. don’t…” squirming and resisting as much as you could but ofc crumbling down the moment wony’s kisses get stronger, sloppier, hungrier… completely being at her mercy eventually, moaning at every kiss she leaves on her skin as she always thought you should be… “mhm, all wet..” she whispers in your ear while she felt up your pussy through your soaked panties :((

“a-aahn..! sto—wait, they’ll hear us…”

“good. i want them to.”

holding onto wony’s wrist while she rubbed your clit harshly,, biting down on your lip but it wasn’t enough with the added pleasure of wonyoung’s breath in your ear 😣 “should’ve known this is what it would take for you to look at me… i would’ve fucked you earlier, unnie.” 🫠 her letting out a moan when she slipped two fingers inside you?? relishing in the feeling of your warmth and how tight you were,, you weren’t a virgin by any means but it still caught you off guard… having to clamp your hand around your mouth to muffle your moans,, but wony was quick to swat your hand away,, “bad unnie.” she said through gritted teeth 😵‍💫😵‍💫

the very obvious dilemma you were having with yourself was enjoyable to witness for wonyoung.. how you actively tried to resist her by your breathy “no”s and “stop”s, but would grind back against her and moan so loudly whenever her fingers hit your sweet spots 🫣 but when she notices that you were stopping yourself from cumming.. oh she got mad 😵‍💫 “still keeping the act, huh? fine then.” and she just starts fucking you harder from behind 🫠🫠 she was relentless—pumping her fingers in and out of your cunt and snapping her wrist when she hits that spot just to drive you insane, slapping your ass until it was red, leaving scratch marks on your waist... it was all very effective bcs she had you screaming immediately 😳

her ripping your pajama top off without a single care in the world,, “don’t give me that look, unnie. i’ll buy you a new one.” she jokes but not really—she can buy you a whole mall and you wouldn’t even have to ask! 🫣🫣 wony taking note of the way the sweetest, sluttiest sounds escaping your lips once her hand reaches your chest… once again being so turned on that she moans herself,, “you’re so shameless now… you love this, don’t you? you want our friends to know what exactly is being done to you, unnie, hm?” wony pinching your nipple to force you to moan loudly :(( even giggling a bit bcs she just found this so fun??

really, really talks you through when you’re close and cumming 😵‍💫😵‍💫 all up in your ear while she does all the right things to your body… bite marks and hickeys on your shoulder bcs she couldn’t resist.. holds your hips still with her free hand while she fucked you in that same merciless pace, only a lot more harder bcs wony absolutely needed to see you all broken up for her 🫢

“come on, unnie… you’ll cum for me, won’t you?”

“yes, yes…! show them, let them hear you, unnie…”

“fuck, good girl…”

omgjdhchjs she nearly came with you with how horny she was watching you fall apart on her hand… the sight of your juices dripping down your legs and pooling at your feet made wony want to fuck you right there all over again but she had to suffice with licking your cum off her fingers for now 🤭 but wony barely letting you come back to your senses when she just leaves you in that room with nothing but a side glance bcs she’s just that bitchy??? leaving you to clean up your own mess, grab a spare shirt from your friend’s closet, and forcing yourself to show your face to everybody after all of that… dare wony say that your red eyes and flushed cheeks were more of a turn on that literally feeling your pussy clench around her fingers!!

but even if wonyoung treated you like filth.. she was still too pretty… so pretty that you don’t bother to do any resisting when she sneaks into your futon super late in the night, ready to make you see the stars all over again 🫣

[onceonafullmoon]

rin headcannons🙏🙏

I think you and Rin would start off as childhood friends, with you both meeting in preschool

You’d always think that he was a little strange with his destructive tendencies but you’d also find him interesting, so you’d always ask him to play with you

And albeit, kind of quiet, he isn’t an unfriendly kid so he obliges, given that you’re willing to play monster trucks with him

Besides he secretly thinks you’re kinda pretty too, so he doesn’t mind hanging out with you

And eventually, those school hangouts turn into playdates at his house with his older brother supervising the two of you rather disinterestedly

He definitely promises to marry you in the future because you’re his best friend and he wants to “have sleepovers with you everyday”

Eventually as the two of you grow older, he stops saying stuff like that and blushes in embarrassment when you remind (tease) him about it

But the two of you remain close, with you watching all of his games and cheering for him on the sidelines, occasionally crashing on him and his brothers popsicle runs

(Sae won’t admit it, but he has a soft spot for the two of you)

And it’s all very comforting to Rin, even when Sae moves to go to Spain because he still has you, doesn’t he?

And with age brings awkward pre teen romance, or rather, the dormant feelings he already has for you and he finds himself thinking about you all too often, though he’s much too shy to tell you

Not that you’re unaffected either as you can’t help but notice how cool he is sometimes (on the field at least, he’s still a dork in your eyes)

But all of that is shattered with just one snowy night, with an argument that takes place after Sae comes back from Spain

You’re not quite sure what went down, as Rin refuses to tell you, but all you know is that after that day he seems more… withdrawn, cold even

He starts ignoring you, pushing you away and you find yourself hurt from the abruptness of it all

It all comes to a head when he’s accepted into Blue Lock, and you only find out about it because his mother mentions to you in passing

And you’re upset, because he hasn’t told you about anything, and he’s always pushing you away, and he fires back at you that you’re a distraction to his goals and he doesn’t need you around

And after that explosive argument, he leaves for Blue Lock and you resolve yourself to move on… or at least try to

It’s not until a few years after that, that you both find each other again, both of you visiting your hometowns

He’s a pro player now and you notice that he’s grown even more handsome since you’ve seen him last, but you try to ignore that as you awkwardly greet him, unsure of how to interact with him from your last sighting

Well, not like you’re the only one struggling, he’s also stunned by how gorgeous his childhood crush and ex friend is now as well as racked with guilt for his past actions

The both of you bumble through pleasantries, a million things left unsaid between you two, and you move to leave when he suddenly blurts out an invitation to lunch

You’re startled and he’s more startled, but plays it like he meant it all along, even though his look of relief when you accept is obvious

The tension is strange at first, but as you reminisce on old childhood memories, you find yourself loosening up, until you’re both acting the same as you always have

Obviously though, you have to address the elephant in the room and after a few days of dancing around the subject you ask him why he left you in that way

And, albeit hesitantly, he tells you about his falling out with Sae and how he felt so determined to be the best he felt the need to push you away

To which you quietly respond that he didn’t need to push you away because you would have done whatever you could to help him achieve his dream

And after that heart to heart you find the two of you growing closer together again, like you always were

Albeit, it's a little different without the blindness of your youth to cover up the obvious attraction you have to each other, but both of you are too shy

That is until one night when you’re talking, and suddenly he just realizes how… pretty you look, and the way the lighting hits your face… and suddenly he’s leaning in towards you

And he realizes what he’s doing too late, but you’re leaning in too, and when your lips meet, it just feels right

And that’s how you finally get together, after years in the making

As a boyfriend Rin can be… just a tad bit obsessive/possessive

It’s not like he’s gonna have you on lock down or anything, though he might think about it a bit too much, but he’s noticeably on edge whenever someone intrudes on the two of you

He’s also got infinitely more patience with you than anyone else (something that you can abuse if you’re feeling particularly evil)

He says he doesn’t like pet names, he is lying

Likes watching horror movies with you if you enjoy them (but he also doesn’t mind if you’re the type to get scared easily and cling to him)

He’s not very verbally affectionate, but he’ll make up for it with physical touch (always having an arm around you, pulling you into a hug when he comes back from practice etc.)

No matter how long you’ve been dating him, he still gets flustered when you’re overly sweet with him 

In all, a cute relationship, and you’re not getting rid of him anytime soon

After all, even though it was all those years ago, he said he was gonna marry you, didn’t he?

[italiansteebie]

for some reason, eddie munson has been hanging out at scoops. scoops ahoy, of all places.

robin isn't sure why he's here, but it seems when he shows up, her rich bitch of a coworker, steve harrington, seems to get real flustered.

how interesting.

she watches from the corner of her eye as steve strikes out with yet another girl, and as eddie scoffs in his direction. it's not harsh, though. more of a fond, knowing look, to which steve meets with his own matching expression.

it seems practices, casual, even. do eddie and steve know each other? outside of boring school hierarchies? are they friends?

the way they're interacting now sure seems like it.

she catches steve's eye, watching as a blush rises to his cheeks, before he ducks his head and wiggles his fingers in some sort of wave at her.

she scoffs and looks back to where eddie was, only to find that he'd moved on already. she pretends not to notice the disappointment on steve's face.

were they actually friends? it seems unlikely but, hey. who is she to judge, the dingus is actually pretty cool sometimes.

---

turns out, the king and the freak were much closer than robin once thought.

and cooler too.

though, that was physically speaking, because about thirty seconds ago, she'd walked in on them in the freezer. luckily, they were only kissing, still, it was a sight she'd never lose.

she power walked back to the break room. "oh my god." she whispered to herself as she sat at the table. "buckley! buck, hey. robin," there was eddie, he looked a bit flustered and the situation fully set in. "hey-"

"robin, you can't-" eddie heaved a breath, "you can't tell anyone, please," his tone was pleading, and his eyes were wide with fear. a concerned part of her wondered where steve was, if he was too ashamed to show his face. no, he wasn't like that.

"it's okay, i- uh. i have a crush on tammy thompson."

"wh- oh. that's great, good. good." eddie breathed. "i gotta go check on stevie." he told her, jerking a thumb towards the walk in.

how steve was still in there was beyond her, that little box was cold.

it was a few minutes before both boys emerged once more, tears frozen to steve's face as he walked out, shaking hands grasping at ring clad fingers.

he was scared. scared of her, robin realized.

"steve-"

"it's okay, robin. eddie told me," he sniffled, hands still shaking. "thanks for being cool about this, my dad would actually kill be if he found out, i- uh. yeah. thanks." he sighed, shoulders finally relaxing, falling away from his ears.

"of course, steve."

"tammy thompson, though?"

"i know, right?" eddie giggled from next to him, still holding steve in a comforting embrace, smiling as steve laughed.

robin scoffed, "what's wrong with tammy?"

"nothing," eddie said casually, while steve decided to forgo pleasantries, "she's a total dud." he scoffed. "she is not!" robin protested, mouth open in amused shock. "glad to see you're back to your bitchy self, sunshine," eddie laughed, watching their antics.

ridiculous.

---

i read @scoops-stevie 's recent post and was ✨inspired✨

[silentglassbreak]

ok bestie I have a request for my delulu self mwuah

my scenario:

Noah’s your hot neighbor, lives in the apartment across the hall. you’ve really only spoken in passing— to exchange pleasantries and phone numbers, just in case— but you did have takeout with him and his rowdy group of guy friends (Folio, Ruffilo, and Jolly, who else?) when he was first moving in. a thank you for moving one single box (that’s all they let you touch before one of them was grabbing it out of your hands). Noah mumbles something about him not about to let “his pretty new neighbor carry his shit.”

one night you touch yourself to the thought of him, you might moan his name 🤭— he’s not even home half the time, what are the chances he’d hear you? except he does. because he’s home and the walls are thin. and your phone dings with his text.

want some help, sweetheart? ft. Noah sleeping over please!!!

preferably anonymous other than x fem!reader but I like pet names!!! sweetheart, baby, angel are my favorites <33

I know it’s a lot of details, you don’t have to include them all, it’s more so to give you an idea of the vibe 💖💖 utterly filthy but still he’s still a softie and a sweetheart

thank you this is actually so cool of you mwuah

Mmmm we love a good hot neighbor trope, yeah? What a cutie patootie he is, eh?

Mkay, let’s get into this.

After Writing Notes: This man will be the death of me…

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: smut, dirty talk, Noah being an absolute munch 😜

Skin

“Good morning, Angel.” His deep voice rings in my ears, and there he is, as he always is, sitting on his balcony, joint in his hand, guitar perched against the rail. He’s likely writing again, but Christ, does he have to always be out there at 7AM? I hate being up this early, and am never in the mood to speak to anyone.

I just want to sip my coffee, clear my cobwebs, and mentally prepare for my workday. The shop is packed, and my books are completely full, my first session starting at 9AM. I don’t have time for his early-bird antics today, nor the patience.

“Morning.” I grumble between sips of steaming hot coffee.

“Sleep well?” He pushes his joint out in the ashtray, careful not to damage it, obviously saving it for later.

“Mmph.” Is all I can muster while leaning back in my chair, pulling my sweater tighter around me. The crisp October morning has brought about hues of orange and amber in the trees surrounding the building. My favorite time of year.

“Busy day today? Must be if you’re up at this hour.”

I sigh heavily, eyes darting to him. His pale yellow hoodie and black beanie look so perfectly placed.

Noah is attractive, there is no arguing it, but he’s annoying. He’s always so positive and chipper. His friends are always over, as upbeat as he is. They’re in a band, and to be fair, they aren’t bad. They just like to start practicing at 10AM, on Sundays, which are the only days I get to sleep in.

I like them. On occasion, they’ll invite me over for pizza and to watch hockey, which I usually accept. None of them have ever been creepy or made a pass at me, which is so refreshing.

Noah does some mild flirting, using pet names instead of my actual name. Nick let it slip once that it’s because his ex has the same middle name as my first name, and that bugs him. He would rather not associate me with someone like her. I suppose that’s fair, so I’ve let it go. They’re all sweet, non-provocative names anyway.

“All booked today.” I slipped out.

He nodded. “I plan to schedule with you soon.”

I rolled my eyes. “You say that every week, Noah.”

His guitar was now dutifully placed on his lap, his fingers strumming a slow melody. “True, but the struggling musician lifestyle doesn’t exactly come with a wad of cash.”

I smirked. “Told you I’d discount you.”

“Discount as in…free?” I chuckled.

Despite hating his early routine, he usually did manage to perk me up in the mornings.

I stood up, opening the sliding door and slipping inside. “Keep dreamin’, champ.”

-

The day had been absolutely brutal. My wrists were still vibrating from holding my machine the entire day. I had hoped my last client would be done two hours earlier, but he had to keep taking breaks. Because of that fact, my hands were extra tired, and there was no way I could finish my sketch in preparation for tomorrow’s client, so I had to wake up early again.

Slinging my bag over the back of the couch, I huffed out a groan as I slumped down onto it. Days like today were becoming more and more frequent, and I was exhausted. I needed to clear my books for a week and have a staycation. Do nothing and see no one.

Heaving myself up, I made my way to the bathroom, taking my hair out of the tight bun it had been kept in all day. My fingers scrubbed at my scalp before I turned the water of the shower on.

I let my wrists and hands sit under the scalding spray for what felt like hours, just trying to loosen the joints. Afterwards, I massaged a brutal amount of lidocaine cream on them to ease the tension.

Pouring myself a glass of red wine, I stepped out onto my balcony with my favorite sweatshirt and the latest book my sister had recommended to me. It was a love story with very light smut, so she figured I’d enjoy it. If only she had known the types of stories I read regularly.

Still, I humored her.

Flipping on my porch light, I leaned back on my chair and pulled a blanket from my basket over me, covering my bare legs.

“Hey, sweetheart.” I startled, nearly spilling wine all over the pages.

“Jesus Christ, Noah!”

He chuckled. “I’m sorry, I thought you saw me.”

“No, gosh you almost gave me a stroke.”

His eyes peered over the separating railing at me. “Whatcha reading?”

I snorted, taking a gulp of my wine. “Some romance novel my sister keeps bugging me to read.”

He nodded his chin at this, not verbally responding. I noted the beer in his hand, and his eyes peering out at the city below.

I didn’t know Noah well at all. In fact, I knew so little that it was almost freaky, given that I saw him all the time. That’s the price I pay for being closed off. I do, however, know that he doesn’t drink much at all, and typically only does when something is bothering him.

“You okay?” I closed my book around my fingers so as to not lose my place.

He didn’t look up at me or respond, just took a pull from his beer.

No quips or witty remarks? This was even more unlike him.

“Bad day?”

He nodded.

“Want to talk about it?” He didn’t say no, but he didn’t say anything. He just sighed heavily. I pursed my lips, watching as his eyes stayed trained on the lights flickering off in the distance of Los Angeles, entranced in his own mind.

Then an idea sparked. “Oh! I know!” I set my book down, and stood up. He looked at me, finally. “Stay there! I know what you need!”

He quirked an eyebrow and took another swig from his bottle. I ran inside, grabbing the grocery bag inside my work tote, the goodies still untouched from my way home. When I came back out, I reached in the bag, pulling out the yellow package.

“Catch.” I chucked it at him, which he caught one handed. He scanned the bag, and smiled.

“All pink and red Starburst.” He looked back up at me. “You know what I needed.”

I smirked, pulling my other candy out of the bag, Sweettart Ropes, and began munching. He popped the bag of his own candy open and began unwrapping the tiny cubes.

“Now do you want to talk about it?”

Looking down at the wrapper balled up in his hand, he sighed hard, chewing the soft candy.

“We met with our label today.” His beanie from earlier was still on his head, perfectly placed. “They want us to join a tour.”

I chewed my ropes, speaking around the candy in my mouth. “And that’s bad? I thought that was part of being a band? Isn’t that how you make good money?”

He nodded, drinking more of his beer. “It can be, but I’m nervous. And they’re pressuring us.”

“What do you have to be nervous for? You’re super talented.”

He looked over, raising a suspicious eyebrow. “When have you ever heard our music?”

I scoffed. “Every Sunday morning through the paper thin walls.”

This made him laugh, which was a nice sound in comparison to his previously somber tone.

“I just recently started working on my vocals. Our early stuff was mostly all screaming. This last album has singing, though. I don’t feel ready to perform that live.”

I nodded. “Well, you practice, I know that.”

“Yeah, but it’s not that simple. I’ve got to know I can do it. I can’t second guess myself or I fuck up. I know it.” He sighed hard, setting the candy and beer on his table, and pressed the heel of his palms into his eyes.

“Mm,” I swallowed my candy. “is it a crowd thing?”

“I’m not really sure.” He rested his elbows on his knees. “I feel like it’s a being put on the spot, thing? I don’t know.”

I mulled this around. “I see.” I played with the idea in my brain before speaking. “So sing to me.”

His eyes shot up. “What?”

“Sing to me, Noah. Right here, right now.”

“The fuck? I can’t just do that.” He looked bewildered.

“Why not? It’s about being put on the spot. So sing to me.”

Noah stared at me as if I was insane. “What do I even sing? I don’t know any Taylor Swift songs.”

I scrunched my nose up at that. “Gross. No thank you.” He chuckled at that. “Sing me something of yours.”

He shook his head. “You won’t like our music.”

“Sure I do! I know you sing one about lions? Sing me that one!”

He all out laughed then. “The one about lions? Are you kidding?!”

I joined in on his laughter. “It’s the only one I remember.”

He groaned. “You’re serious?”

I sat back in my chair, chewing my candy, silently making it clear I was dead serious. He rolled his eyes and stood up.

“Hang on.” He disappeared inside. I took a large gulp of my wine, and waited.

He returned a few minutes later with his acoustic guitar, the one he usually had in the mornings. He also had taken off his beanie and sweatshirt, his tattooed arms and freshly cut hair on display. Were his arms always so muscular? No, he had definitely been working out.

“Alright, I’ll play you the one about lions, but please don’t laugh if I go off-key?”

I leaned forward, glass in hand, giving him my full attention. “Never.”

He sighed, and strummed the opening riffs of the song. It was slower, and sadder than when I had heard him practice it.

“You set me up as a villain, but you never mentioned the root of the problem. Took what you wanted and flipped it, but you won’t be dragging my name to the bottom.”

Noah’s voice was melodic, perfectly on key.

“So much unsaid. Left me for dead. I won’t forget.”

The song sounded more powerful in this style.

“Well everyone’s listening. And they know the difference. You’re not failing our senses.”

His fingers stopped strumming for a beat.

“If you’re throwing me to the lions, you should know I’m not scared of dying. I wouldn’t take back one thing I did. One word I said, but I’m going to make you wish you did.”

I smiled at the chorus, now remembering why I remember the lions.

“Jump to conclusions, they fall for illusions, but you weren’t there trying to stop them. You’re going low at the end of the road, but that won’t be the path that I follow.”

I finished my wine, setting the glass down and intertwining my fingers.

“So much unsaid, left me for dead. I won’t forget.”

He stopped strumming again, and I noticed he had his eyes closed. He hadn’t opened them once.

“Well everyone’s listening. And they know the difference. You’re not failing our senses.”

“If you’re throwing me to the lions, you should know I’m not scared of dying. I wouldn’t take back one thing I did. One word I said. But I’m going to make you wish you did.”

The chord progression changed leading into the bridge.

“I’m holding on to this until the scale’s untilted.”

He stopped, his pitch rising.

“Well everyone’s listening, and they know the difference. You’re not failing our senses, but you’re pushing my limits.”

“If you’re throwing me to the lions, you should know I’m not scared of dying. I wouldn’t take back one thing I did. One word I said. Oh-whoa.”

I leaned back in my chair, thoroughly enjoying this private show I was receiving.

“If you’re throwing me to the lions, you should now I’m not scared of dying. I wouldn’t take back one thing I did. One word I said. Oh God, I’ll make you wish you did.”

He strummed the final chord and opened his eyes. I was smiling from ear to ear. I clapped my hands together, which made him blush.

“Oh stop.” He set his guitar down, leaning back in his chair and grabbing his beer.

“That was fantastic, Noah!”

He shook his head. “It was okay. I wasn’t on key the entire second chorus.”

I rolled my eyes. “Are you always this hard on yourself?”

He smirked. “Always.”

“Please tell me that song is called Lions.”

This made him genuinely laugh. He shook his head. “It’s called Limits.”

“Mm, close enough.” He smirked at me.

“You really liked it?”

I nodded in response. “I did. It was really beautiful.”

His eyebrow raised and his thumb traced the rim of the beer bottle.

“You’re really beautiful.”

My stomach dropped clean out of my body, and my expression stilled. He didn’t waver, however, staring at me with a stern expression.

“Thank you.” Was all I could manage to say.

He nodded in acknowledgement, throwing back the bottle and tossing it into the trash can next to his table.

“Well, it’s past my bedtime. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

I smiled. “Bright and early.”

He grinned back. “Goodnight, Angel.”

“Goodnight, Noah.”

-

I tossed and turned in bed, sleep being the farthest thing from me. I had to get some rest, as I had to be up in less than eight hours, but even the wine hadn’t been able to wash the day off of me.

To be honest, the melody of the song kept ringing through my brain, the image of Noah strumming his guitar flashing past my eyelids.

His arms are so big. He’s actually kind of…buff? He didn’t look like that when he moved in. As much as I loved his long hair, the short hair was so fitting on him, falling loose by his ears.

Before I could stop myself, my hand was snaking down into the waistband of my shorts, fingers ghosting over the top of my clit. An orgasm should help me sleep, right?

As much as I know my rose would make quick work of this, the idea of having another vibrating object in my hand made my wrists ache. I opted to just take my time, fingers circling my sweet spot, and let myself indulge in the idea of my hot neighbor, fingers running over the string of the guitar. Arms flexing when he moved his hand up and down the neck. Throat constricting as the lyrics flowed out of his plump lips.

I could feel myself getting into the idea, my body sinking comfortably into the mattress. Lips parting, I pictured him on the other side of the walls. What did he look like shirtless? Was his chest as muscular as his arms? Did his tattoos spread all the way to his chest?

My fingers applied more pressure, making me squirm, and a soft breath left my lips. I wanted to be quiet, but I was alone. Did it matter?

Noah is likely sleeping, so I doubted that he would be able to hear anything.

I let a moan escape, letting one finger dip between my lips and feel how the moisture had built up at the thought of him. My pussy ached at the idea of his hands, long fingers pressing into me. I would bet he could hit my sweet spot with the first knuckle. I gasped hard, my hips bucking at the thought.

“Oh fuck.” I groaned, my mind drifting even further.

If his fingers were that long, how long was the rest of him? Did his cock size up to his gargantuan stature? What would it feel like? Would it hurt? Would it stretch? Likely, given I hadn’t been intimate with anyone for at least eight months. Would riding him be possible?

“Mmm,” I licked my lips at the image. “God, Noah.”

His name slipped out, and for a split second, I almost blushed, until I remembered it was just me.

That is, until I hard my phone chime on my nightstand.

I groaned, stilling my hand and growling. I was so close, and now it was gone. I snatched my phone, but my body froze when I saw the text on my screen.

Noah: Having fun over there, sweetheart?

My brain melted, completely mortified. Why was he awake?! He went to bed an hour ago!

I couldn’t respond, wishing I could sink into a hole in the mattress and disappear.

His type bubble appeared, and my heart rate sped up.

Noah: You’ve been at it a little while. Sounds like you may need a hand?

What do I even say to that? Am I okay with that? The heat between my legs screamed at me, telling me to take him up on his offer, but my brain put the brakes on.

We are neighbors. Did I want to change that dynamic? Did I want to tempt the fates?

I’m not, and have not been, in a place where I wanted to be in any kind of relationship/situationship/friends with benefits agreement right now. What did inviting him over mean?

Or was it that deep? Did I need to think about it that hard?

Me: Back door’s unlocked.

My finger hovered over the send button for a good 30 seconds before finally getting the nerve to press send. Once I had, I practically threw my phone across the room in hysteria.

What had I done?

After a moment, I heard a sound of a mattress creaking and shifting, and the sound of his sliding door.

Holy fuck.

My room was pitch black, so the light trailing in to the room from the moonlight was disrupted when his tall silhouette appeared. The door slid open smoothly, and he stepped in.

Instinctively, I reached over and tapped on the lamp on my bedside table, propping myself up on my elbows.

There he stood, hair just slightly messy from his pillow, shorts hanging low on his hips, and no tshirt.

Well, that answers my question. His chest and abdomen were covered in colorful, beautiful tattoos. Behind them, his muscles were chiseled and tight.

“You good, angel?”

He stood, and leaned his back against the wall, arms behind his back.

I guess my expression had been confusing, so I shook my head.

“Yeah, just a little embarrassed.”

This made him smile. “You shouldn’t be.”

“No? How much did you hear?”

With this, he pushed off the wall, taking a few steps to the bed, sinking down on the edge next to my leg.

“Oh, not too much.” His hand reached out and his palm ran over my duvet. “Just you moaning my name.”

His eyes flicked up at me from under his lashes.

That was it. I was dead. My face turned a deep crimson and I threw my head back, pulling the pillow over it, praying it would just suffocate me.

This made him chuckle. “What’s wrong?”

“That’s humiliating!”

He snorted. “I find it extremely flattering.”

“Oh, I’m sure you do.” My words were muffled by the pillow.

“You know, you could’ve just asked me to come over.”

I pulled the cover from my face and scoffed. “Oh sure.” I put my hand up to my ear to mimic a telephone. “Hey Noah! I know we’ve never had any kind of sexual contact - ever - but would you by chance come by and help me get off so I can get some sleep, since I can’t seem to quit thinking about you?”

“Sounds good to me, I don’t see the problem.” His smile was so mischievous. I couldn’t help but sheepishly grin.

“Noah-“

He cut me off. “How many times have you touched yourself while thinking of me?”

My mouth hung open. “This is the first time…”

He nodded, his hand sliding along the blanket and closer to my leg underneath.

“What changed?”

I shook my head. “What do you mean?”

“We’ve lived next door for six months. Why are you attracted to me now, all of a sudden?”

“I’ve always found you attractive.”

He smirked, his hand slipping up over my calf, applying a small pressure. My skin tingled.

“Then the feeling is mutual.” He sighed, looking up at me. “But tonight was different?”

“I just…” I shrugged, rolling onto my side, which pushed my body closer to him. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you singing. Playing the guitar.”

His hand moved up, sliding to my hip and resting there. “Ah, okay. So I serenaded you, and you couldn’t resist?”

This made me giggle. “Gosh, you’re such a dork.”

He snickered, scooting himself closer to me. “Mm, maybe. But it doesn’t change the fact that you were thinking about me.”

“No, it doesn’t.”

Suddenly, the air was thick, and he was leaning closer to me. I leaned my head back, giving him full view of my face. When he was close enough that I could feel his breath brushing across my lips, his eyes searched mine.

“This can just be a one-night thing if you want?”

I bit my bottom lip, and nodded gently.

I felt the skin of his lips press into me as my eyes closed, and I molded, form-fitting to him easily. He shifted, his body laying sideways next to me. Noah’s hand reached up and grasped the side of my face, pulling my body in closer to him.

I couldn’t feel or hear anything but the sound of his soft breathing against me, and the pressure of his hips pressing directly against mine.

His hand fell from my face and grabbed my leg by the back of the knee, hiking my leg up to hook on his hip, pulling my body into him even further. The press of his erection behind his shorts provided the sweetest friction against my pussy, still clothed by my shorts.

He groaned into my mouth, and I bucked my hips against him, begging for more contact.

Making out with Noah was more fun than I had imagined. He licked at my tongue, and I tasted the mint toothpaste he had used right before bed. His lips made the most delicious sounds when they sucked and pulled on mine, it had my head twirling in so many different directions.

All of my fantasies were replaying in my brain. His hands, his arms, his chest. My hands began wandering down his body, feeling every last ridge of muscle he had. I felt the ripple of his skin when he flexed, his body so warm and inviting.

He pulled his lips off of mine to look down at me, eyes dark and full of what had to be desire.

“What do you want me to do?”

What kind of question was that? Wasn’t it obvious?

“What?” I felt as though I was missing some hidden meaning.

He shifted, his body now looming over me, and I laid back flat on the bed so I could look directly at him.

“What…” He leaned down to kiss my lips. “do…” Kiss to my jaw. “you…” Kiss to my throat. “want me…” Kiss on my collarbone. “to do?”

I was panting, my need to feel him against my skin causing a hot burn everywhere I couldn’t.

“I, uh” His lips were attached to my neck, nipping and sucking on the skin of the tattoo etched there. “I don’t know. I just need to feel you.”

He pulled back, eyebrow raised, and smirked.

“Well,” He huffed a breath, running a finger down the skin of my chest above the tank top I wore. “I could pull this off of you.” His hand palmed over my breasts, his thumb tracing around my hard nipple. “Suck on these until you’re begging me for more.”

His eyes glanced up at me, and I just stared at him, eyes blown wide, trying to beg with my stare.

“Or…” His hand lifted off of my chest, and swiftly reached down, grabbing hold of the waistband of my shorts. “I could bury myself between those thighs,” My legs shook at the thought. “and lick you until you’re begging me to stop?”

My hand tightened on his sides, my hips pressing up toward him.

He leaned down again, licking a stripe up my throat. “Then, when you’re a hot, shaking, whining mess, I could fuck you until you can’t see straight.”

I moaned, his hand slipping down to tangle in the small patch of hair I had above on my pubic bone. “How’s that sound, baby girl?”

“So fucking good.” I felt his lips smile against my throat.

“You’ve made it easy for me. You’re not even wearing panties.”

I huffed out a small laugh, letting my eyes fall closed. “Yeah, well maybe I was hoping this would happen.”

“Is that right?” His kisses were moving down my body, his hand pulling my breasts free from my shirt. “Knowing you were over here thinking of me had me so fucking hard, sweetheart. You have no fucking idea.”

Noah’s tongue began circling around my left nipple while his hand massaged the other, his teeth nipping at the sensitive skin.

He only focused on my chest for a moment before moving downward, leaving a trail of kisses and bites down my stomach, leaving a particularly hard one on my hipbone.

“So fucking sexy, angel. I won’t lie, I’ve thought about you before.” His fingers pulled my shorts down and off with no hesitation, his body settling between my legs.

“I’ve touched myself, dreaming about this gorgeous fucking pussy.” Noah placed a soft, gentle kiss on my inner thigh. “I can see how wet you are from thinking about me, baby. I hope you’re fucking ready.”

I didn’t have time to question what that meant, as his lips were now attached to my clit, the tip of his tongue circling it expertly while his lips sucked hard. My back arched off of the bed, the sensation nearly knocking me sideways.

“Fuck!” I screamed out, hand burying itself in his dark brunette hair. “Oh my God, Noah.”

“That’s it, gorgeous,” He licked at me, lapping up the fluid pooling between my lips. “fuck my face, pretty girl.”

My hips rutted forward, pressing myself into his lips harder. His arms circled my thighs, locking me into place while his mouth absolutely ravaged me at my core.

My entire body was vibrating, my eyes locked on his beautiful face, eyes closed and so focused.

I could feel myself beginning to crest on the edge of my orgasm, and his name came out as a string of prayers off my lips.

“Ugh, Noah…Noah…Noah…”

Without warning, he lifted me hips off of the bed, bringing himself to kneel on the mattress, so only my upper back and head were left on the pillows. The angle brought an entire new level of sensation. His tongue assaulted my clit, flipping back and forth from kitten licks to long, flat strokes, making me dizzier with each repetition.

“Noah, I’m going to come.” I breathed out, and his eyes opened, looking directly at me. His head began to move back and forth ever so slightly, him now locked onto my sweet spot. The ministrations sent me so far over the edge, I felt as though my entire body was floating.

“Oh fuck! Noah! Jesus fuck!”

He didn’t stop, however. Although he was licking me carefully through my climax, he didn’t show signs of slowing down…

“It’s sensitive. Please, I can’t take anymore.”

He disconnected from me for a second to smile deviously. “Sure you can.” And he continued.

“No, please, it’s too much.” I could feel tears welling in my eyes.

He pulled off of me, laying me back down, with a glint in his eye and a smirk on his lips. “The safe word is lions. Use it if you need it.” And he was back to it, making my vision go white.

“Noah, oh God, I can’t handle it, please!”

“You can, and you will.” His voice was factual, leaving no room for argument.

Just as I was about to protest again, I felt his tongue stop, and a sinfully long finger pressed into me, bringing about an entirely new sensation.

“Jesus Christ.” I was struggling to breathe.

“That’s it, baby. You’re so good, taking it all the way in. You’re so fucking perfect.”

My walls tightened around him at his words.

“It’s so fucking tight, baby. I’m almost worried it’s going to hurt when I fuck my name out of your mouth…” He looked up again, pressing a second finger in, a burning sensation pulsing through me. “…almost.”

My chest heaved, my breathing erratic and unstable. It was too good. It hurt so perfectly. His hand began pumping in and out of my body, causing loud, wet sounds.

“Going to make a mess, baby? I’d hope you’d wait until you were in my bed for that.” I couldn’t feel anything but his fingers inside me, driving me to insanity. “Thats alright, I’ll clean up. Go ahead and let go, honey. Come for me.”

An ear splitting screech ripped out of me, my body being rocked by another hard orgasm. His hand slowed, his fingers slipping out eventually.

“So fucking pretty. You got me all wet, I can’t tell you how fucking hot that was.”

I laid, eyes closed, working to bring myself back down to Earth. I wasn’t given much of a chance before I felt his tongue lapping at me again, making me squeal and jerk away from him.

“Nope.” His hands pulled me back to him. “I’m not done with you yet.”

The tears in my eyes were running. “Noah, please. Please!”

“I haven’t heard the safe word.” His face was buried in my folds, tongue pressing inside me. “You can do it baby, just one more, okay? I need one more.”

My head fell back on the pillows, savoring the soft, slow swipes of his tongue against me. It was almost…relaxing? He wa easing me through it, building me back up.

“Okay baby, you ready for another?”

I didn’t dare look at him, only nodded my head.

His fingers slipped back in, curling at the spot that makes my toes curl, and latched onto me again, his lips sucking hard on my clit.

This orgasm came quicker, washing over me like ocean waves hitting high tide. This time, I only managed to sigh hard when it hit me, feeling so wonderfully exhausted.

“That’s my girl. Perfect.”

I felt him lift up, but I still couldn’t make eye contact. My eyes were so heavy, and I couldn’t even fathom movement.

The bed dipped down next to me, and I cracked my lids to see him smiling. He reached down and kissed my cheek lovingly.

“Still there, Angel?”

I smiled a sleepy grin, and nodded. “That was…” There were no words. They didn’t exist.

“I’m glad you enjoyed.” I felt the blanket being pulled over me, and I opened my eyes in confusion.

“What are you doing?”

He chuckled lightly. “You need to get some sleep, beautiful. I know I talked a big game, but you’re exhausted. That was the goal.” He smoothed a hand over my stomach. “Help you get some rest.”

I rolled on my side, pouting slightly. “What about you?”

He shook his head. “I’ll be just fine.”

His hand reached over and switched the light off on the nightstand. He moved to stand up, by my arm came out to grab his. He turned his head and looked at me.

“Could you…” I cleared my throat. “I’d like it if you stayed.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Yeah? Even though it’s just one night?”

I smirked, lifting the blanket for him to crawl under. With his own grin, he did so, lifting his arm so I could tuck in, head laid on his chest and arm falling over his stomach.

“Maybe it's more than just one night.”

[pickingupmymercedes]

I need you to let me go - Lewis Hamilton

Sequence: Not just a pretty face / I need you to let me go / Fly on my own / Leap of faith (bonus)

pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Reader!

warnings: angsty

wordcount: +2K

a/n: It's not even a slowburn atp, just pure longing and angst. Anyway, do we want a happy ending or just pure heartbreak and right person wrong time trope?

As always, I'm open for feedback, come say hi!

_______________________________________

The air thrummed with a deafening bass beat, the pulsating lights painting the faces in the opulent ballroom with a kaleidoscope of colors.

Y/n felt the familiar unease crawl up her arms. Parties like this were a necessary evil, a way to keep her father's business connections happy. But that night, the forced smiles and meaningless conversations felt unbearable. Her eyes flitting across the room, searching for the familiar dark hair she had seen before, a hint of that easy swagger that always seemed to draw her gaze.

Lewis stood laughing to a corner, his arm casually draped around the waist of a blonde model. Y/n recognized her from his Instagram baddies rounds; someone with a penchant for fame, fast cars and the medal that was having Lewis Hamilton for a weekend.

A sharp annoyance twisted in her stomach, but not jealousy, not exactly. It was more a bitter disappointment, a confirmation of something she'd always knew but had been trying to ignore. Lewis, the man who often made her world tilt on its axis, was just like the others and their list of conquests.

She straightened her back, forcing a smile onto her lips as a group of her father's associates approached. They were a predictable bunch – men with oil money dripping from their tailored suits, wives adorned with enough diamonds to blind those who didn’t know any better.

The conversation followed a familiar script – pleasantries about the weather, questions on her father, on who would take after his business, about her "jet-setting lifestyle." Y/n answered with practiced ease, her mind already a million miles away.

But then a voice cut through the monotonous drone. "Y/n! Looking as radiant as ever."

She turned to see Francis Chrysler, heir to a automobile empire and carrying his family name on that party, much like Y/n. They had known each other since they were kids, Y/n would travel up north to spend summer in the Hamptons with her grandmother and Francis would meet his parents in the US, back from his bordering school in the UK.

Y/n couldn’t deny he was something. Tall, impeccably dressed, and with a smile that could charm the birds from the trees, Francis was exactly the type of man everyone hoped she’d marry – stable, successful, from a “good family” and undeniably the type to merge her family’s fortune to even deeper riches.

But that night, he was also the perfect tool for the job at hand.

"Francis" she replied, a touch of coolness in her voice. "Lovely to see you."

The blonde took her hand, his fingers lingering a beat too long. "I must say, I didn’t expect to see you in the city so early in the year."

" You know me too well. I’d much rather stay in California until it’s warm enough up here" she said, her eyes scanning the room again. Lewis was gone, the blonde model nowhere to be seen.

“But duty called?” Francis focused his gaze on her, trying to get her to look at him before he touched her arm “Something like that” she finally conceded, looking up at him with a warm but emotionless smile.

The rest of the night was a blur of champagne flutes and hollow conversations. Francis, was attentive, even charming in his way. But his attentions only served to highlight the hollowness that echoed inside her.

Lewis's fleeting stares, the way his eyes seemed to see right through her meticulously facade - those were the things she craved, the things she couldn't have.

As the party started to wind down, Y/n found an excuse to slip away. She needed air, needed a moment of sanity away from the suffocating atmosphere and maybe some fresh air from her own mind.

Stepping outside onto the balcony, she took a deep breath of crisp night air. The city lights shimmered below, a glittering reminder of everything she was supposed to aspire. But all she could think about was how her mind and heart could never reach an agreement.

A sudden movement near the edge of the balcony caught her eye. Lewis stood there by himself, leaning against the railing, his face hidden in the shadows. A surge of conflicting emotions coursed her as she noticed he too studied her face – relief, anger, hope.

"Lewis," she said, her voice barely a whisper.

"Enjoying the company, Y/n?" His voice was a low murmur, his hands gripping a bit too tight against the metal bar.

The question was laced with a playful challenge, a reminder of her earlier display with Francis as they talked and his hand rested a bit too low on her waist. "I manage" she replied, forcing a lightness that didn't quite reach her eyes.

"So, I see," he said, his gaze dropping to where the blonde’s hand had been. A flicker of something dark crossed his face before it was quickly masked by a charming smile. "He seems...familiar with you."

"He's harmless" Y/n said dismissively, the lie bitter on her tongue.

"Didn’t look like that" Lewis countered, his voice taking on a serious edge.

They stood there, the unspoken tension hanging heavy in the air. Y/n, unable to bear the weight of his gaze any longer, broke eye contact.

"Jealousy doesn't suit you, Y/n" Lewis said, his voice laced with amusement.

She scoffed. "Jealousy? Don't flatter yourself, Lewis. You can have your little arm candy."

His amusement vanished, replaced by a coldness that made her shiver. "Is that what he was then? Your arm candy?"

Silence stretched between them, thick and suffocating. Y/n knew she was playing a dangerous game, one that probably wouldn’t end well.

"Why the charade, Y/n?" He took a step closer, the air crackling with unspoken tension. "Why the forced smiles?"

"Maybe," she countered, her voice holding steadier than she felt "because I'm tired of the stolen glances and the late-night texts that lead to nothing."

Lewis stared at her; his expression unreadable. She could almost hear the cogs turning in his mind, processing her outburst.

A bitter laugh escaped her lips. "Don't tell me you haven't felt it too, Lewis. The frustration, the longing. We dance around each other like moths to a flame, but neither one of us dares to get burned."

He remained silent; his jaw clenched tight. Finally, he spoke, his voice hoarse. "What do you want, Y/n? Because honestly, I have no idea anymore. It was never a secret how I feel about you."

Her heart hammered against her ribs. Here it was, the question she both dreaded and craved.

The answer, however, remained a tangled mess of emotions.

"I..." she started, then stopped.

There was the comfortable life she'd always known, the endless jet-setting, the security of her family's wealth. The power she carried with her from a very young age. A power her mother had taught her to never take for granted. To never trade for a man.

But then there was Lewis, her very own whirlwind of passion and ambition who challenged everything she thought she knew and wanted. He was exhilarating and terrifying in equal measure. And she couldn’t stand the possibility of changing a single inch of him, even if he offered.

"I don't know," she finally admitted, a tear rolling down her cheek. A truth so raw and honest it took her by surprise to being able to say out loud.

Lewis reached out, brushing the tear away with his thumb. His touch a reminder of their connection that transcended words. For a moment, they were lost in each other's eyes, a silent peace hanging in the air.

"But you want something" he pressed gently.

She nodded, unable to speak through the lump in her throat. Part of her yearned for a life intertwined with his, a life with the adrenaline he came intertwined with. The other though, craved stability, a future that she could plan about.

"Why are we doing this, Lewis?" she blurted out, finally turning to face him fully again. "This game of… of pretending we don't care."

His jaw clenched briefly, a flicker of frustration mirroring her own. "Because," he began, his voice low and controlled, "because it's easier than this. Easier than admitting what this is."

He gestured vaguely between them; the unspoken truth thick in the air.

"And what exactly is this, then, Lewis?" she challenged, a tremor in her voice finally showing the faltering of her walls.

He took a step closer, his eyes searching hers, and with each step, the temperature between them seemed to rise, Y/n not backing the slightest.

"It's frustrating, isn't it?" Y/n spoke the words hanging in the air, her voice barely a whisper.

"It's torture," he corrected her, his voice raw with emotion. "Seeing you with someone else..." He trailed off, leaving the sentence unfinished. The implication hanging heavy. Y/n felt his pain echo within her, a bittersweet recognition.

His eyes searched hers, a silent plea hanging between them. He wanted her, she knew that much. But the fear of disrupting their fragile equilibrium, of sacrificing their comfortable charade, held them both captive.

A wave of despair washed over Y/n. They were caught in a never-ending loop, dancing around their desires, afraid to take the leap.

"Then why do we keep doing this?" she whispered, her voice cracking. "Why do we keep pretending?"

He reached out, his thumb tenderly brushing at her hand.

"Because," he said, his voice barely above a murmur, "because even this… even this agonizing dance is better than not having you at all."

"Is it?" she questioned, the tears she had tried so fiercely to keep in finally spilling over. "Because all this yearning is slowly breaking me."

He flinched at her words, the pain in her eyes mirroring his own. They stood there, bathed in the city’s lights, the weight of unspoken desires and the reality of their relationship created a suffocating silence between them.

Finally, Y/n took a step back, pulling away from his touch. The physical distance mirroring the emotional chasm that seemed to be growing between them.

“I can keep you in the dark, Lewis. You deserve love. And I can’t give you that. Not right now” The look of raw vulnerability on his face tore at her heart, but she knew she was right. They couldn't keep living in this state of perpetual longing.

"Y/n, I’m not a child, I know what I’m getting myself into" he began, his voice laced with annoyance. But she held up a hand, silencing him.

"I need to go" she choked out, turning away from him before she crumbled completely.

Without another word, she walked back inside, the party lights blurring with the tears that she fought so valiantly to hold in.

Weeks later y/n found herself sneaking into a european f1 paddock late at night on a Friday.

The roar of the engine had long been replaced by the sterile hiss of the garages closing around them. It was a sound she would normally hate, a constant reminder of the world that made Lewis impossible to her.

But that night, it was a chilling and fitting melody to accompany the hollowness in her chest that threaded to swallow her.

They hadn't spoken in almost a month. Not since the party and since their talk, the one that shattered the fragile peace they'd managed to balance.

His silence was a language she knew all too well, a tapestry woven with disappointment and unspoken blame, his and hers.

She watched him from across the dimly lit garage, the harsh overhead lights glinting off at his temple. He looked beautiful, untouchable, a goddamn champion shrouded in the shadows.

It was a sight that would've probably lighten something in her, a reminder of why she kept coming back.

But tonight, all she felt was a cold dread.

"I need your help Lewis.” she whispered, the words a plea and a surrender all at once. The air hanging heavy, thick with the unspoken truth that both refused to accept it.

His eyes flickered to hers, surprise quickly replaced by a steely glint. He opened his mouth to retort, but the words died on his lips as she continued. “I need you to let me go”

Maybe he saw it too, the raw vulnerability etched on her face, the fear that threatened to consume her.

"Because honestly," she murmured, her voice barely above a choked sob, "I haven’t been able to do it on my own”

The words hung in the air, a desperate confession that shattered the carefully constructed walls around her heart. Lewis took a hesitant step towards her, his brow furrowed in confusion.

"Y/n?" His voice was rough, laced with something that sounded suspiciously like hope.

She shook her head, tears blurring her vision. "Nobody gets me like you" she choked out, the words echoing the hurt in the duty she felt to follow her better judgment instead of her heart.

It was a messy confession, a tangle of contradictions and unspoken desires. But in the quiet of the garage, under the harsh glare of the lights, it felt like the only truth that mattered.

Lewis closed the distance left between them, his arms enveloping her in a warmth that chased away the chill that had settled in her bones since that NYC night.

There were no answers, just the echo of a question hanging in the air, a question that they both knew neither had the answer to. But for those moments, in the fragile space between letting go and holding on, they hung to a sliver of solace, a flicker of hope that maybe, just maybe, they could find a way out.

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[jessejaredstories]

Lesson for a Lesson

Bryan considered himself to be a cut above the rest. He had always been the kind of guy to turn the other cheek when it comes to handling conflict with others. Even if they were the biggest asshole Bryan has ever met, he’d never stoop down to yelling vulgarities or other petty insults just to get back at them. He’d keep his cool attitude, stay respectful, and minimize future interactions; even if the person didn’t deserve as much as a single look in their general direction. Bryan held the title of always being the bigger person with pride, regardless of how haughty it made him look to others.

However, Bryan’s high and mighty attitude would soon meet its biggest enemy yet when the new neighbor Mr. Martin moved in down the hall. Bryan didn’t think much of Mr. Martin at all when he first met him. Mr. Martin was a single man living on his own. He was pushing 40 and worked as a PE teacher/football coach for the local high school. All in all, Mr. Martin was a pretty ordinary guy. 

As far as Bryan was concerned, Martin would just be another face he’d occasionally run into in their shared apartment building but ultimately ignored otherwise. And that was more or less how their relationship continued for the next month or so. They’d share pleasantries, but nothing else beyond that. They were friendly neighbors, at least until the first time they bumped heads. 

Their apartment building had an open access rooftop with a fully furnished lounge. Residents were free to make use of the lounge as they pleased. One day, Bryan decided to take his boyfriend up to the lounge so they could stargaze together out on the rooftop. While the two lovebirds were spending time together, Martin also happened to show up sometime later. He had brought his telescope to do some stargazing himself. Both parties kept to themselves for the most part. That is until Bryan and his boyfriend began to get intimate. Martin shot them a dirty look but then didn’t say anything at first. Only after a few minutes passed and the two boyfriends were still making out did Martin decide to speak up.

“Hey, I understand that you two are ‘in love’ or whatever, but can’t you go do that in a private room? This is a shared space after all, I don’t want to see that out here.”

Bryan didn’t appreciate the stern tone of voice Martin used with him. It made him feel small, like he was back in high school. He was just as much an adult as he was! But Bryan decided to bite his tongue. Martin had a fair point, it probably wasn’t very considerate of him to be full-on tongue kissing with his boyfriend out in public the way they were. So he apologized, took his boyfriend down to his place, and that was the end of that minor spat. 

But that incident turned out to be only the start of their problems. Soon after, Bryan decided to buy a new welcome sign for his front door. It was a pride welcome sign and had big rainbow letters on it. It only took a day until Martin was knocking on his front door, asking him to take it down. Naturally, Martin would never outright say he wanted it gone because of the rainbows, but Bryan wasn’t stupid. He knew how to connect the dots and read in-between the lines. Only a homophobe would be pushing so strongly for a pride sign to get taken, and Bryan would sooner drop dead than bend over for a bigot. He stood his ground, and Martin left with a scowl on his face. 

From that point on, Bryan and Martin were constantly at each other’s throats. Jab after jab and nonstop passive aggression. They continued having incidents and their animosity for each other only grew steadily over time. Bryan was getting fed up, but he never backed down nor did he ever blatantly disrespect Martin, even when he had no problem disrespecting him. It was an uphill battle, but Bryan saw a light at the end of the tunnel. His lease would be up for renewal soon. All he had to do was not renew his lease, move out, and he’d never have to see Mr. Martin ever again. It was simple! 

Or so Bryan thought. One morning, after Bryan’s boyfriend had spent the night over at his place, he received a very interesting text. One that would snap Bryan’s patience in half.

Babe! I ran into your bigoted neighbor in the elevator last night. I tried to ignore him, but he wouldn’t leave me alone. He kept harassing me and when I wouldn’t talk to him, he started calling me a worthless fag. I’m okay, he didn’t touch me, but I wanted to tell you what happened. I’m not sure I feel comfy enough to go back to your place anymore. : (

Bryan read over the text a couple of times. Once he made sure he read it right, Bryan decided enough was fucking enough. He then slammed his phone down on the nightstand and marched straight to his closet. He never wanted to be the kind of guy who got revenge, but Martin crossed a line after he went after his boyfriend. And if Bryan was going to get revenge, then he was going to come at him at 110%. He had to dig through his things but he eventually found what he was looking for- a body swapping potion. 

Bryan plucked the tiny vial out of his closet. He had saved it for when he really needed to use it, and getting payback on a bigot seemed like the perfect time to use it. Before he could use it, he had to prepare for what comes after the swap. He pulled out a chair and made a makeshift rope out of some leather belts he had laying around. Bryan then proceeded to drink the potion, but instead of swallowing it right away, he held the brew in his mouth. It tasted rancid, but he held out. Bryan used the belts to tie himself up to the chair, completely immobilizing himself so that Martin couldn’t do anything in his body. He used a real knot technique too, just for extra security. Once he was satisfied with his setup, Bryan swallowed the potion and blacked out.

The body swapping potion took effect immediately. Bryan’s consciousness left his body in the form of a long, glowing, snake-like mass of matter. It slithered out of his body through his nostrils and plopped onto the ground. It then began its long journey towards its intended target. Bryan felt weird leaving his lifeless body behind, especially while knowing that Martin would soon be inside of it, but he carried on with his mission. Their swap would only be temporary after all; once Bryan had his fun, they’d switch right back. 

Bryan’s soul made its way to the nearby high school where Martin worked. Luckily, nobody was able to see it slithering by. It slithered into the faculty bathroom where Mr. Martin was just about finishing up his midday shit. Bryan’s soul squeezed underneath the closed bathroom door with ease and slithered right up to Martin.

“Hm?” Martin noticed something glowing out of the corner of his eye. He lowered the magazine he was reading and screamed when he saw the giant, translucent snake creeping up on him. Martin leaped up into the air out of shock with his pants still around his ankles. Big mistake. 

Bryan’s soul quickly expanded until it was the size of an anaconda. It then used its massive size to wrap around Martin, constricting his mobility. Mr. Martin was hyperventilating. He couldn’t move! All he could was watch as the tip of the glowing snake tickled the head of his exposed cock.

A cold shiver ran through Martin’s body with the soul snake’s cool touch. The soul snake then forcibly wiggled its way into Martin’s dick slit. The sensation of getting penetrated made his cock harden up to full mast. Bryan’s soul then slithered down the length of Martin’s girthy member. Martin threw his head back as his body got taken over. He purred a deep, sensual mmm! as it happened. He could feel the cold feeling that started at his groin spread out to the rest of his body as Bryan’s soul took over his body for itself. 

The body takeover started off slowly at first, but as Martin’s body got filled with Bryan’s being, the process began to rapidly speed up. Suddenly, the entire anaconda started rushing into Mr. Martin’s body through his cock. Martin was gasping as the waves of pain rolled over his body. Luckily for him, it only lasted another five seconds. With one slurp, his now engorged cock swallowed up the last few inches of Bryan’s soul.

“Nrrghhh… Fuck…” Martin moaned. Those moans were the last thing Martin said before his body hunched over to throw up his own soul snake. Martin’s soul snake came rushing out of his mouth. Once it was out, it slithered out the bathroom, likely on its way to take over Bryan’s limp body. It left behind a smirking Mr. Martin, only this time, it was Bryan who was in control.

“Whew! That was easy!” Bryan said with his new, baritone voice as he stood up. Bryan immediately noticed the difference in their bodies as his consciousness adjusted to its new heavier, hairier vessel. His nostrils were penetrated by the strong yet familiar musk of his own hairy pits. He took a sniff of his new sweaty body odor and let out a loud, satisfied ahh! Bryan could literally feel how every new inch of skin felt as he moved around in Martin’s body. He then stretched out his new body, while also getting a feel for the thick hair he had all over his body. Bryan always had a thing for furry men, though he was never able to grow much body hair himself. To be able to takeover a hairy body like Mr. Martin’s was just icing on the cake for him. 

Bryan took a look at his reflection in the mirror, winked at himself, then stepped out of the bathroom, ready for revenge. He had one hand on the doorknob while using his other hand to jerk off, making sure he was still nice and hard for what he was about to do. An evil grin formed on his face. It was go time.

Bryan stepped out of the faculty bathroom ass naked with his erect cock swinging around freely. He wore a proud smile on his face as he displayed his hairy body in full display. He then wrapped a hand around his cock and proceeded to jerk off ferociously. Bryan made sure to exaggerate the volume of his moans and groans to make sure any nearby faculty heard him. Surely enough, someone heard him, and they stepped in to see the glorious sight of revenge live.

“WHAT THE FUCK!? MR. MARTIN HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND!?” the man shouted. He drew the attention of other nearby adults, who all came in to see what was happening. All of their jaws dropped to the floor as ‘Mr. Martin’ laid down on the table, naked and grinning.

“What do you mean? It’s my lunch break, brah! I deserve to have a little stress relief before I go back to teaching those cocksuckers- I mean, wonderful students! Hey, do any of y’all happen to have sweaty socks on right now? I could reallyyyy use a hand, I wanna finish quickly and my pits aren’t enough to get me there.”

Bryan lifted his arm and took a deep, loud whiff of his dank pit smell. The sight of watching Bryan lick up the droplets of sweat forming on his pit hairs made some of the standby faculty gag. They began to disperse.

“Shut the door to the faculty floor! We can’t let anyone else find out about this!!”

“I-I’ll go call a therapist, he’s definitely gone insane…”

“What’s the matter with y’all? Pshhh y’all act like you’ve never seen a dick before! Don’t be afraid! Bask in the full glory of the male body!! Look at my beautiful, hairy body!”

“Alright, Mr. Martin, let’s just take some deep breaths and get some clothes back on…”

“MAN FUCK Y’ALL!! Y’all some lame ass bitches! I don’t need y’all, I’ll just finish myself off!” Bryan lifted his leg high up in the air. His puckered up, hairy asshole was now on display for all to see.

“Here’s a cool biology fact for y’all! Did ya know you don’t need to go that deep to reach the male g-spot?” Bryan licked up his middle finger until it was soaked with spit. He then reached over to his ass, rubbing around his hole until his finger slipped in with ease. He let out an obscene moan as he fingered himself. “You really need about a knuckle’s length to get to the prostate, you just gotta- AWW FUCKK!! I found it!”

Bryan began jerking off and fingering himself at exaggerated speeds while howling and grunting like a monkey in heat. He accidentally farted while fingering himself, and the smell of his flatulence combined with his sweaty musk to create a particularly potent odor. He made sure to make a display of him sniffing up the strong smells while the audience covered their nose. He kept the act of intense masturbation up for another minute or so, really letting himself get into character, until finally climaxing. Bryan quickly pulled his finger out of his ass and used both hands to pump his cock. 

“Ohhhh fuckkkk that feels soooo gooood…!!” Bryan went cross-eyed as he slowly stroked his throbbing cock with the firm grip of his man paws. The pressure of trying to hold it in was building up, making for an extra strong orgasm that Bryan couldn’t help but give himself into. “Get ready y’all… Here comes Old Faithfullll!!”

Just as he advertised, an eruption of jizz came flooding out of Bryan. His whole body was twitching from orgasmic pleasure, but he managed to hold himself together just enough to point his cock around. He became a squirt gun as he shot load after load of warm, sticky cum all over the faculty lounge and himself. The whole place became covered in his seed, leaving him huffing for breath after such an intense climax. Any remaining faculty had evacuated once they saw what was about to happen, leaving Bryan alone in the lounge.

“Alright… Mission accomplished…” Bryan said with bated breath. “I just… I just gotta switch back…”

Bryan was satisfied. Not only did he completely destroy Mr. Martin’s reputation, but he’ll be coming back to his body naked and covered in jizz at his own workplace! Bryan was sure he’ll be absolutely humiliated, especially considering how many witnesses saw ‘Mr. Martin’ lose his shit in public. 

Bryan steadied his breathing in preparation to swap back to his own body. He had paid top dollar to get the most premium potion money could buy. The body swapping potion was special in that all he needed to do to switch back was simply think about! He focused his mind, thought about what he wanted to achieve, and willed himself back to his body! 

…But nothing happened.

Bryan opened his eyes to find himself still in the teacher’s lounge inside of Mr. Martin’s body. 

He wasn’t sure what he did wrong. He tried again but to no avail. He tried swapping back with his mind again and again but no matter how many times he tried, nothing happened. Bryan was quickly growing nervous, especially as he heard police sirens coming nearby. He tried several more times but it was futile. Bryan was arrested for public indecency as Mr. Martin before he could swap back to his original body. Bryan was in deep shit and he knew it.

The next three days were absolutely miserable for Bryan. He had spent those days locked up and berated for what he did. He hated every second of it. All he wanted was to get back inside his own body and run back into the arms of his beloved. No matter Mr. Martin. No more misery. No more pain.

Bryan pleaded guilty on all charges and took a plea deal in order to avoid jail time. He paid a hefty price for his freedom; a total fine of $50,000, 100+ hours of community service, house arrest, court mandated therapy, and he had to register as a sex offender. But Bryan didn’t care, they weren’t tied to his real identity after all.

Once he was out, Bryan traveled back to his apartment as fast as he physically could. He made it back to his apartment in record time and used the secret key to get inside. He was praying to God that his body would still be sitting there tied up in the chair, just waiting for him to return. He opened the door and his heart immediately sank when he saw an empty chair and torn belts. Bryan dropped to his knees. His eyes began to tear up. He noticed there was a sheet of paper sitting on the chair. Bryan crawled over to it. It was a handwritten letter, and it read: 

Hey there! First off, I want to thank you for switching bodies with me. To tell you the truth, I’m not the real Mr. Martin. The original Martin is looong gone now after so many swaps. But me, I actually used to be just like you. I was gay and pissed off at Martin, and like you, I decided to body swap with him to teach him a lesson for his homophobia. But then I found myself in the same situation I’m sure you’re in right now. I couldn’t swap back to my original body. For some reason, Mr. Martin’s body won’t allow its owner to leave. Only someone else can initiate a swap with Mr. Martin. I’m really sorry man, but I can’t go back. I won’t go back! I’m stealing your body for myself. My mind has been trapped in that homophobic body for God knows how long, just swimming around in that vile hatred… I want to be my own person again. I’ll be praying for you, I hope someone swaps with you before Mr. Martin’s body corrupts your mind, but considering how quickly it took over mine, it’s not looking good. Again, I’m so sorry. Best of luck. PS - Don’t worry about your boyfriend, I’ll be sure to love him just as much as you did and more! He’s safe with me. Bryan. 

Bryan was dumbfounded by the letter. He was even more dumbfounded by the pictures of himself. He had no memory of taking those pictures, which could mean that someone else took those photos with his body. Bryan swallowed the lump in his throat. The walls around him seemed to be closing in. He tried pulling himself together but was failing. Shriveling on the floor, Bryan began repeating a mantra to himself in an attempt to hold onto his identity.

“My name is Bryan, and I am a proud gay man… My name is Bryan, and I am a proud gay man… My name is Bryan, and I am a proud gay man… My name is Bryan… And I am a proud gay man…”

Bryan repeated that mantra out loud every single day from there on out. He said it as many times as he could before his throat got irritated from talking so much. He did everything he could to remember who he truly was. Everyday he studied gay history, watched only queer romances, did his favorite things, and even journaled his thoughts and feelings.

Days became weeks, and slowly but surely, Bryan was losing his grasp on his original identity. He gradually stopped following his routine. He forgot his identity mantra. He even began referring to himself as Mr. Martin. He had lost himself as his mind and soul merged with his new body. 

But while Bryan was gone, Mr. Martin was living the easy life. He was a single man living on his own. He was pushing 40 and worked as a busboy at a local restaurant. All in all, Mr. Martin was a pretty ordinary guy living an easygoing life.

The only real problem Mr. Martin had had to do about the new neighbors that just moved in across the hall from him. They were two young men sharing a single bedroom apartment. Mr. Martin never really cared to know his neighbors all that well, but he recently found out the new neighbors were actually a gay couple. He recently spotted them kissing in the hallway through his peep hole the other day. The sight of them kissing irked his soul, and he planned to ask them to not exhibit that kind of behavior out in public around the apartment building again. Surely, they won’t have a problem with it. Right?

[flemingsfreckles]

Replacement Part 3

Read the other parts here

Warnings: PLEASE TAKE THESE SERIOUSLY homophobia, parental abuse (emotional, mental, and physical), internalized homophobia, language

WC: 3.5k

A/N: alright so this sorta took and added extra turn to it, on top of the enemies to lovers, we’re now going to be working through some internalized homophobia stuff too,

“Ladies, this weekend, after training Thursday I want you all to go do something for team bonding, goalkeepers together, midfielders together, defenders, you all get the idea, try to make small groups, 3-4 players and pick an activity. We want you to get comfortable with the people who will be your support system on the field, we’ll do more full team bonding later. Starting small.” You usually didn’t mind team bonding, it was always a fun time, getting to hang out with your friends.

“You’re coming in my group!” Coffey grabs the back of your training top as you both walk away from the huddle.

“Yeah, cool.” You were more than happy to let someone else organize the groups and the plans, that was never really your forte.

“Me, you, Hina, and then Fleming too.” You give Sam a look that must’ve expressed your frustration with her adding Jessie. “You can handle an afternoon with her, you need to remember your teammates.” You bite your tongue before anything rude comes out of your mouth, you were doing your best to keep it civil with Jessie, Sam was right, she was your teammate at the end of the day.

You and Jessie hadn’t spoken since you lashed out at her on the field, but that didn’t mean the girl had given up on being your friend. The Monday back after game day you had walked in early to a mostly empty locker room, a few teammates here and there. You noticed Jessie’s bag already in her cubby, her clothes already changed. You then noticed the muffin sitting on the top shelf of your cubby. You had rolled your eyes at the sight of it, knowing who brought it. When she came back into the room and you muttered a quiet thank you to her, she gave you a tight lipped smile and a small nod before turning her attention away from you again. The two of you remained in silence for the next week, not exchanging compliments or critiques. You only spoke when necessary for drills or in training. Jessie stopped her typical pleasantries to you when she’d arrive to training every day, instead a small hello with no follow up was how she greeted you.

Thursday comes unfortunately fast for you. You really didn’t have a huge desire to do things after training normally and now you had to do something with Jessie.

Sam made you and Hina send her your favorite parts of the city, you were responsible for picking a coffee shop, Hina picked lunch, and Sam was responsible for dinner. She had said today would be a good day to give Jessie a less formal, more fun tour of Portland.

You all met up at the coffee shop you had picked. Jessie showed up smiling, camera slung across her chest. She had on a hat, her hair was down, she was wearing a simple white shirt and black pants. You find yourself admiring her, simple and yet somehow good looking, clothing choice before quickly shaking the feeling off. Much to your surprise she immediately came over to you asking about the coffee shop what was good, asking how you found it, how long you’d been going to it. It was if she had forgotten the scuffle between you and the fact that you both had been avoiding each other all week. You however, hadn’t forgotten, so you gave her short answers, letting her know anything was good, you hadn’t had a bad coffee yet, but pretty much ignored all her other questions.

“Hey, can we talk really quick?” Jessie poked you in the shoulder as the two of you stood, coffee in hand, waiting for Sam and Hina who had both ordered sandwiches with their coffee.

“Sure.” You weren’t in the mood to talk but you were going to have to with it just being the four of you.

“I don’t know what the issue is or was between us, can we pretend it doesn’t exist, I don’t know, at least for today? I don’t want them to feel uncomfortable.”

“Yeah, it’s fine, I just was having a bad day that day, sorry, I didn’t mean for it to carry over this whole time.” You half ass apologize, all while lying to her face. You hadn’t just been having a bad day, she was the cause of all your bad days so far. If you hadn’t meant for it to carry over all week you would’ve apologized days ago. But to keep the day going smooth, you made up the story, to make her feel better, to help you both move on.

Once you’d all grabbed coffee you walked around, Sam had named herself the tour guide and proceeded to walk you all over town to see various things. She would point out stores she liked, the best place for pizza, all hoping to give Jessie a better lay of the land. Jessie seemed to enjoy herself, you watched her look around in awe at the city you’ve come to call home. She had such a sense of wonder to her, looking at all the buildings, stopping to read the plaques with historical information. She also was constantly stopping for a step or two to take a photo. On a few occasions you caught her taking photos of the three of you walking.

When you look at her and she realized you’ve caught her she smiles. “Sorry, I just like capturing what going on around me, the people around me. I can delete them if you don’t want to be in photos.”

“Oh, no that’s fine, I don’t mind.”

“Cool,” Jessie gives you a smile before pointing ahead where Sam and Hina were standing up the street, both turned back waiting for you. “We should probably catch up.”

“Right.” You head up to where the other girls were, you couldn’t help but wonder about the photos Jessie took, you wanted to see them, but you didn’t want to ask.

Sam had stopped with Hina in front of a bar. “My first date in Portland was here, cute place, terrible date!” Turns out it was a popular first date street as Hina points out the first date she went to in Portland was just across the street.

“I guess we’ll have to wait and see where Fleming gets dragged to on her first date in the city. Where was your first date in Portland?” Sam turns her attention to you. You should’ve changed the subject before she had the chance to ask you.

“Um.” Nowhere is the correct answer, you hadn’t dated, you had no interest in dating the men in Portland or anywhere, so you didn’t. You kept to yourself, you were also still learning life after college, life in a new city, you had every excuse not to try dating. “I haven’t been on an official date since moving here, just too busy with moving, new city, training, all those things.”

Sam gives you a strange look, you’re not sure why, she knew you hadn’t been on dates. The two of you talked about her love life all the time, you figured she knew you hadn’t seen anyone.

“Yeah I wouldn’t expect any date stories from me anytime soon, I’m probably going to make sure I get settled first before I try seeing anyone, plus dating is exhausting.” Jessie quickly speaks up, you’re not sure if it’s intentional but it takes away from the awkward realization that in the year and a half you’ve lived in Portland you’ve never been on a date. Sam and Jessie fall into a debate over if dating is fun or exhausting and you’re happy to slip back into your own thoughts, not having to think about dating, relationships, or anything of the matter.

The day wasn’t nearly as bad as you had thought it was going to be. It was different, not being in a competitive environment had you looking at Jessie differently. She even made you laugh at lunch a few times. She was wittier than you expected for how quiet she tended to be. As you toured around you constantly found her walking next to you, letting Sam and Hina walk together. She’d point things out to you that she found pretty. When she’d stop to take a photo, you’d find yourself waiting for her while the other two walked on. It was weird, you felt less hostile towards the girl.

Jessie had stopped again, pointing out across the way to a bridge. You looked at the bridge and then watched Jessie take a couple of steps, bending down and then standing back up, trying to figure out where to take a photo from. She was calculated about it, just as she was with playing. For a minute you watch as she brings her camera to her eye before snapping a photo. You watch as she looks down at the screen with a smile, proud of whatever photo she took and for a split second you’re filled with a feeling of warmth, a small tingle in your stomach, stronger than the feeling you would get when she’d hand you a coffee or when you’d see the muffin she’d brought you. You physically shake off the feeling, you weren’t feeling that for anyone, especially not a girl, and especially not Jessie. You hated her.

The rest of the afternoon goes by, you don’t participate much in conversation, at dinner, letting the other three carry on. You’re too focused on that single moment, the moment you forgot you hated her and instead you felt something else. You felt a feeling you hadn’t had in years, a feeling you couldn’t have, you had promised yourself that.

No boys would get in your way of your career, no relationship would be manageable, your parents made sure of that from a young age. There would be no distractions, you didn’t have the time for a boyfriend, husband, anything it wasn’t an option, never had been. You had always been focused on school or training, never enough hours in the day for anything besides those two. Your parents pushed you to what felt like every minute of every single day, even as a kid. Doing extra school, extra weight training, extra running. You hardly had friends, having only one or two good friends your whole childhood outside of your teammates, you had no other hobbies, you played soccer and went to school. There was no time for a boyfriend.

A girlfriend certainly wasn’t an option, not even a thought, but that wasn’t a problem, you weren’t gay. You had been subtly taught your whole life that men date women and women date men, those were the options, anything else was unacceptable. You had been called gay, lesbian, and a variety of slurs, kids would tease you when you were younger, you preferred sports, you dressed in shorts and basic t shirts, you weren’t a girly girl, so you were teased, assumed to be gay. Then in high school people made fun of your close relationship with your former best friend, Grace, claiming the two of you must be dating. Those rumors made their way around until almost everyone was asking if you were with her, but you weren’t gay. You weren’t and you couldn’t be, your parents made sure you knew that.

They had temporarily kicked you out of the house when you were 16 after finding what they called “love notes” between you and your best friend. They kicked you out only after ripping apart your bedroom while you were at school, searching for evidence that you were seeing Grace. They didn’t find anything beyond the letters. You hadn’t even viewed them as love notes, just letters you had written to her and she had written to you. They were notes mentioning your appreciation for her and her friendship, telling her how much you enjoyed your time together, how she made you feel safe. There were mentions of “I love you” but purely platonic, nothing romantic in your eyes. Your parents didn’t see it that way and you could still feel the sting on your cheek from your mother’s hand that she had laid on you as you tried to pack and leave all while you argued there was nothing romantic with Grace.

Nothing romantic, until when you showed up at her family’s house crying, unable to get the words out to explain what was happening and she had taken you in. Once you finally calmed down and had explained what was going on she held you tight, her arms wrapped safely around you. She held you and rubbed your back. Grace simply let you exist in her presence, no expectations, no explanations. You didn’t tell her why your cheek was bright red, but you think she figured it out herself. When you pulled back from her grasp she reached to wipe your tears, the way you flinched away told Grace everything she needed to know about the marking on your cheek. She waited before slowly bringing her thumbs up to wipe your tears before holding your face and staring at you with such intensity it made your stomach turn. She told you she loved you, to this day you weren’t sure if she’d meant it romantically or not, and before you could register your own actions you had moved in and kissed her. She kissed you back for a moment before you both pulled away, never mentioning it again. The two of you never got the chance to discuss or even acknowledge the kiss you shared.

Your parents had dragged you back into their house the next day later after learning you had gone to Grace’s house. They welcomed you back into their home only to force you to sit through hateful speeches and lectures about how you’re made to be a wife to a man and how it was disgusting to find another girl pretty. They told you you’d marry a boy and have plenty of his children, you’d raise them while he worked, you would be loyal to him, of service to him, the lectures went on and on, day after day. You we’re grateful though, they kept their hands off of you for the most of the time, instead subjecting you to emotional and mental abuse.

They no longer let you speak and see Grace. Out of fear and a new deep guilt for what had happened between the two of you, you didn’t attempt to reach out. Your parents didn’t know you kissed but you felt like they did, like they knew everything between the two of you. The two of you fell out of touch quickly, you hadn’t seen her since the night you kissed.

Your parents kept you on a strict schedule, baring all communication with anyone who wasn’t a teammate, coach, or school teacher. They made you dress more feminine, they limited what music you listened to, what movies and television you watched, essentially controlling every aspect of your young adult life. They even set you up on dates with boys whose parents they knew, explaining to you that one of them could be your husband. All those dates ended in gross, overly sloppy kisses on your parents doorstep that had you running to the bathroom for mouthwash. It was a miserable few years of your life, ones you prefer to pretend never existed.

When you received a full scholarship for soccer you left for school and never looked back. It wasn’t easy to cut off communication completely with your family, they knew where you were, where your games were held, where to find you, but after your freshman year, they stopped showing up unexpectedly and you finally found a sliver of peace. Despite no longer being in communication with them, those few years still weighed heavily on you. You still flinched slightly if someone made a quick movement toward your face, it had been noticed by Sam and Janine, both asking if you were okay, you lied of course stating it was nothing. Your parent’s words haunted you even more, continuing to impact the way you felt, acted, and existed on a daily basis.

So that’s how you knew to handle your feelings, write them off as something else. The reason you had kissed Grace was because you were too overwhelmed with the thought of being kicked out by your family, you didn’t love her, it was just irrational behavior. The feeling you just experienced towards Jessie wasn’t anything other than displaced emotions. You were just too overwhelmed with your dislike of her, it was starting to show up in different ways. The same displaced emotions that you had felt toward Grace, and again toward your college teammate a few years ago, and now towards Jessie. But you weren’t gay. It was just confusion, too much going on in your head.

“Hello?” You suddenly snap back into the conversation being held in front of you, Hina waving her hand in front of your face.

“Huh?” You had no idea how long you had been zoned out for, reliving the harsh moments of your teenage years. You were just hoping your face didn’t give away to the group that you were remembering some of your worst days.

“Are you okay?” She asks.

“Yeah sorry, just sort of zoned out I guess.” You don't miss the way Jessie sends you a concerned look across the table.

“We’re talking about Saturday's game, how do you think it’s going to go? Are you going to get your first goal of the season?” You know it’s casual conversation but you had no desire to talk about playing

“I’m sure it’ll be good.” Is all you say before putting a bite of pizza into your mouth.

“I’d put money on you scoring.” Hina says before she takes a bite from her own slice.

“That’s if I even play.” You mumble and a silence falls across the table, a blanket of uncomfortable tension falling between the four of you. “Sorry.” You mumble this time with the intention of the others hearing you. You notice the apologetic glance Jessie sends you across the table before you turn your attention back to your plate. The silence until everyone finishes eating, everyone using bites of food to avoid being the one to break the silence.

After dinner Sam and Hina both take off in the direction of their places, opposite of where you lived, leaving you to walk alone with Jessie.

She doesn’t say much on the walk, you’re not sure if she knew, if she knew you had resentment toward her, that deep down you hated her, that you wished she’d go back to Chelsea, leave to somewhere else. Or maybe she just felt the tension at dinner and didn’t know she was the problem.

“How much further is your place?” She asks when she stop walking in front of her own building.

“Just right there.” You point a couple blocks up to your apartment building.

“Do you want me to walk with you?” She offers, it was dark out, she probably just meant it out of kindness.

“I’ve been here longer than you, I don’t need an escort to my own place.” It wasn’t more than a 3 minute walk away, you didn’t need her help walking there.

“Right, sorry, just let me know you get in safe?”

“You’re not my parents Jessie, I don’t need to be watched, I’ll be fine.”

“I know I’m not, but sure like your parents I’d just like to know you made it home safe. I always ask my friends to let me know, I asked Hina and Sam to text me too!”

“Yeah, news flash, we’re not friends, you know nothing about my parents.” You spit out before turning quickly and walking in the direction of your place. You don’t look back, you’re not sure if Jessie went inside or watched you walk all the way. When you’re inside you don’t text her, part of you feels guilty for not, she was looking out for you, but you put your phone on the kitchen table and head straight into bed.

You were emotionally exhausted from the day, first with training, then with spending the afternoon chatting and socializing, and finally with the internal fight over what you were feeling for Jessie and what you had been told your whole life and on top of knowing she was your replacement, you can’t feel anything but hatred for her. When you lay your head down on your pillow you felt a tear run from the eye across the bridge of your nose and drop onto the pillow.

You felt scared and uneasy, having no idea how to process your emotions and having no one to turn to. So you laid in bed, awake staring at the ceiling in a pit of uncertainty, feeling so unsure of yourself, as a player and even more so as a person.

[wttcsms]

repeat offender, hiromi higuruma.

pairing hiromi higuruma x f!reader  word count 1.9k  synopsis vignettes of hiromi higuruma's life, featuring his inevitable early-onset mid-life crisis, his disillusionment with the justice system, and how he can't seem to shake you off. content contains law partner's daughter!reader, no curses au, corporate/big law lawyer!hiromi, bratty, always trying to get a reaction out of him reader x just trying to survive the day hiromi, slight age gap (hiromi is 26, reader is 20), eventual smut in later parts, sfw but suggestiveauthor's notes something a bit different; just wanted to test out diff narrative formats lol (and also, this was the closest thing in my gdocs to being finished & i feel guilty for not giving y'all new content)

all the wrong dialogue options were chosen here

Despite the ceiling clearance being so high that it’s enough to make a man of his stature feel small and the fact that despite all the warm bodies in this banquet hall right now, it would still be more of a challenge to bump into someone rather than avoiding them; despite the fact that the air conditioning system must be working overtime since he hasn’t felt the need to shrug off his tuxedo jacket once, despite the fact that he’s free to leave at any time he wants since he’s already gone through the obligatory introductions and the empty pleasantries—

—despite it all, Hiromi Higuruma feels trapped. The walls are slowly closing in on him, and someone from across the massive room is laughing a bit too loudly, and the ceiling, with its intricate crown molding, feels like it’s going to collapse onto him at any second. 

That’s the problem when you decide to be someone you’re not. He’s constantly on his toes, always having to look behind him, always trying to make sure his mask isn’t going to slip. Fresh out of law school. Top marks, top of his class, actually. As expected, as always. 

Hiromi is used to setting the curve, so it doesn’t take him long to learn how these circles operate. Laugh at the right jokes, order the right drink, find the right people to praise, the right suit to wear — he’s good at figuring out the right answers to everything. 

“The party’s never going to end, so if you feel like leaving, you might as well just go now.” 

Hiromi turns to face the source of that sentence, only to have to glance downwards, taking in the sight of you. Glossy lips, long lashes, slinky gold gown clinging to the curves of your body. He swallows. Hard. 

You smile. Sweetly. 

“Before you go, though, you mind getting me a drink from the bar?” You point to the bar that’s across the room, the area Hiromi just left, one old-fashioned in his hand. 

The first wrong thing Hiromi says is, “It’s an open bar.” 

Your shining smile barely falters, but he catches the subtle curve of a frown almost taking shape. 

“Do you really think I could fight off that crowd?” You give him a faux pout, one that only emphasizes the pretty shape of your lips. 

Looking like that, he thinks you wouldn’t need to fight the crowd to get the bartender’s attention. Everyone would probably be clamoring for yours, actually. He doesn’t tell you this, though. Instead, he says, “Like you said, I might as well just go now.” 

Boo. This stranger is no fun. What a waste of good looks, you think to yourself. Taking in the way his body fills out his suit, the tall bridge of his nose, the sharpness of his features — maybe it’s for the best that he’s no fun. You’re not sure how you would be able to keep your cool if he actually was interesting. 

“Don’t just paraphrase. I remember saying that after telling you you should do that if you feel like leaving.” 

He wonders what you’re doing here, at one of the biggest charity galas sponsored by the big law firm he’s going to be joining shortly after his graduation. There’s no way you’re a law student; only a select few final year students were invited in the first place. He can’t fathom you being someone’s plus-one; looking like that, he certainly wouldn’t be able to let you out of his grasp. 

He doesn’t ask you anything, though. He doesn’t compliment you, or say anything that’s on his mind. Instead, he hands his half-empty glass to one of the catering employees walking by that’s collecting dirty glasses, and he tells you, “I’ll be heading out now. Good luck with the bar.” 

It certainly wasn’t the right thing to say, but being a genius comes with some pressure. He figures he’s allowed to give out a few incorrect answers every once in a while.

apex predator 

The click-clack of your four-inch heels making impact against the tiled floors of your father’s law firm serves as a signal to everyone that they need to seek immediate shelter (read: cower in the nearest coworker’s office) and try not to make direct eye contact with you. 

When the boss’s daughter comes to visit, everyone’s on edge. 

Everyone except the new hire. 

Hiromi Higuruma is by no means slow on the uptake, but he’s clocking in the most billable hours out of everyone. Very rarely does he get a chance to take a break, and he doesn’t plan on wasting what few precious minutes of a break he can get on hiding from some brat whose single defining characteristic is sharing the same last name that’s plastered on this skyscraper of a building.

When he passes you by in the hallway, you catch a glimpse of him from the corner of your eye. Broad shoulders, slim waist, and a familiar slope of a nose bridge you’ve seen before. You almost falter in your footsteps — almost. 

bucket list idea: fuck in an elevator

There’s something intimate about being in the same elevator as someone else.

When there’s a handful of people, it’s casual. Simple. Someone who forgot deodorant, someone who’s running late for work, someone who just burnt their tongue trying to drink their coffee too fast. All of it is mundane. 

Being in an elevator where it’s just you and him — you haven’t decided yet if it’s a gift or a punishment. 

“My father loves the work you’ve been doing,” You’re the first one to break the silence. You can only hope that he’ll be the first one to break the distance between you two: a respectful four feet apart. 

Hiromi clears his throat, straightens his tie. He’s staring straight ahead, right at the shiny silver of the stainless steel doors. “Thank you.” 

“Don’t thank me. I’m not the one who said anything about your work.” 

The corners of his mouth almost turn up at that. He fights the urge to smile. 

“Then thanks for the honesty.” 

“Do you like that?” You ask him. 

“Like what?”

“Honesty?” You ask it innocently enough, but when you give him those eyes, and make your lips form that pout, everything comes out sounding sultry. He’s convinced you could be reading his most recent M&A deal out loud to him and make it sound like you’re reading an erotic romance. 

“Well, I’m a lawyer.” He finds that he has to bite back his smile when he’s around you. He stares at the slowly changing numbers on the screen. The two of you entered from the parking garage, and the elevator’s making its steady ascent to the thirtieth floor. 

“So that’s a no.” You muse.

Hiromi makes no comment.

whatever pays the bills, i guess

Hiromi Higuruma, unlike every other undergrad trying to get into law school, does not take… creative liberties when it comes to his personal statement on why he wants to become a lawyer. Potential medical school students lie and say they want to “save lives” because “living with six-figure student loan debt for the first decade out of school and then making crazy bank afterwards seems like a good trade-off” just doesn’t sound very awe-inspiring, does it? 

In another life, he thinks he’s probably a defense attorney. Representing the Little Guy. Keeping alive his desire to uphold the principles of justice and that the wrongfully accused receive fair representation. Even with the odds stacked against his client, he’s certain that he’s good enough to win their case.

However, the world is unfair. Doing the good thing rarely pays off. Being a good person doesn’t get you very far, either. One of his former classmates was such a bright, kind girl. Passionate statement of purpose, too. She applied to all the same law programs as Hiromi and got accepted to exactly zero of them. 

Hiromi got into every single one, and his statement of purpose was honest, straight to the point, and damn-near clinically cold.

I need a competitive environment that takes pride in its intellectual rigor, but I have no desire to pursue medical school just to spend a decade in college and residency. Law school seems most appropriate for my needs.

who hired the intern?

Hiromi doesn’t know what you do around the firm, just that you’re constantly here. 

Even when you’re not physically present, he still finds traces of you lingering everywhere. The scent of your perfume that sticks to the elevator’s walls, your now-empty medium sized iced matcha latte in the trashcan of the breakroom, whispers of your names when his colleagues are in the mood to gossip, the click-clack of your heels that he can hear from inside his office even though his door is closed.

He can’t tell if you’re just inescapable or if he’s constantly subconsciously seeking you out. He doesn’t want to know the answer.

What he does want to know the answer to is why you’re sitting on top of his desk at seven in the morning, your medium sized iced matcha latte in all its green glory (this is the first time he’s seen it full and not as an empty plastic cup in the trash). You’re wearing a fitted white button down with a gray wool skirt that will have the HR manager doing a wide-eyed double-take when you walk past her. Your legs are crossed, and Hiromi scolds himself for noticing. 

He focuses on your face instead, upset to see that you’re still doing that unfair move of yours — that pout, those eyes. 

“What are you doing in here?” Hiromi manages to get the words unstuck from his throat. He’s not even sure how you got the keys to his office, and then he remembers who your father is. 

You smile brightly. 

“My dad says I need some ‘resume-boosting’ activities, and how convenient is it that the firm is looking for an off-cycle intern?” 

How convenient, indeed.

“Still doesn’t explain why you’re sitting on top of my desk.” During your chirpy exclamation, Hiromi manages to pull himself together. He’s getting a few steps closer to you. He’s not going to sit behind his desk, not yet, but his approach only serves to bring you two into closer proximity. If you stretch your legs, the pointy tips of your stilettos will brush against the fabric of his trousers. 

“Well, every intern at the firm is apparently assigned a lawyer to work under. Y’know, to be a mentor.” 

He can’t decide if he likes or detests where this is going.

“And,” you continue. “Dad only wants the best for me. It’d be, like, kind of suspicious to be working directly alongside my father, though.” Yes, Hiromi muses. Because getting a law internship at one of the most prestigious firms during your undergrad is certainly not suspicious at all. “So, the next best thing would be the so-called prodigal lawyer that everyone can’t stop praising. How convenient is it that you’re able to watch over an intern for the semester?”

“Very convenient.” Hiromi raises an eyebrow. “Are you going to get off my desk now? I can’t imagine you’ll be able to learn much if your back is going to be facing me when I’m sitting at my desk.” 

“Whatever you say, sir.” You hop off the desk, gently tugging your skirt down in place. He keeps his eyes focused on your face the whole time.

[crow-stars]

❝LITTLE BITS OF GOLD❞

❦summary; how can something so small and practically worthless make him want to protect it with all his heart. how unfair... ♪the characters in this story; gn!reader, azul ashengrotto, jade leech, floyd leech ✎word count; 2,151 ❀what do the ghosts say?; ambiguous, azul and reader are childhood friends, reader is a jellyfish, going to a carnival/fair with the tweels, azul calls reader dumb but not in a bad way ☛the author's notes; went to an event today, so posting this at who knows what am. also i suck ass at darts ☪look at the catalogue?

Azul doesn’t understand you. In all honesty, ever since the two of you were kids, he didn’t understand you that much. 

You were a pretty merfolk, skin that glowed a soft gold and purple in the dark of the sea, that see through domed hood framing your head in a beautiful manner that Azul still finds pretty even as he’s grown up. Jade and Floyd always liked dragging you around during the night as their own personal flashlight. And, of course, Azul was taken along for the ride, sticking close to you during those stupid night trips. You were always around the three, idly drifting along and going along with whatever adventure or antic the tweels decided to do for the day. 

You always liked Azul though, for whatever reason. In his eyes, you were like a barnacle stuck to his side, following after him for whatever he was doing or silently watching from the side. In all honesty, Azul was sure you were more of an airhead than anything else, not that was a bad thing, always talking about the future and things that Azul knows are a far distance in the future. Despite that, he still listened, sometimes even daring to daydream alongside you on the rare days where he let himself relax. 

A few years before Azul had been accepted into Night Raven College, you had to move away, or do a “migration”, as your parents had told you. You slowly slipped from Azul’s thoughts as studying magic and his enrollment in Night Raven College took priority. He had almost completely forgotten about  you (though not really), until the beginning of his sophomore year, having attained the role of housewarden and having built his reputation, Azul was ready to escort the new batch of freshmen into when someone called out to him with a familiar nickname. 

“Azu! Azu!” Before Azul could even register it, two arms wrapped around his abdomen and a cheery smile greeted him. There was only one person who would ever call him that and it was you. 

Azul’s cool facade was broken as embarrassment struck across his features, cheeks burning a pink hue as he looked at you. You were smiling so brightly at him, giggling in glee and bouncing on your heels. Your eyes had an undertone of gold to them, little gold and purple specks akin to freckles across your cheeks that remind Azul of your underwater form. Azul didn’t know whether to scold you or push you away, but it wasn’t the time for pleasantries. 

That was how his reunion went with you and it brings him back to the present, with you and Floyd stacking plates in a precarious manner. Another game that Floyd’s most likely pulled you into. Ever since you arrived at NRC, Floyd was doing the same thing he did when they were kids, dragging you along after him on whatever whim he pleased and you would always happily follow along, drifting and following whatever came to you. 

“Could you two stop that?” Azul grumbled as he raised his head from his work, eyes narrowing at you and Floyd. 

“Ah, sorry Azu.” Your eyes looked over to Azul, hands folding in your lap and tilting your head, giving Azul that blank look that he identified you with. Floyd, meanwhile, pouted his lips in protest and groaned, rolling his eyes. 

“Hmmm... Azul’s no fun. Hey, Jelly, here.” Floyd places the plate that was in his hands on your head, balancing it on top of you while you sit still. Your eyes glanced up at the plate before a soft laugh slipped past your lips, the little gold freckles on your cheeks pulsing a gentle glow that it seemed to do whenever you laughed or giggled. Floyd clapped and Jade, who just passed by, stopped to watch his brother as Floyd began to grab the plates from the stack to transfer onto your head. 

Azul heaves a heavy sigh and shakes his head. He lets his pen drop from his hands, knowing he’s not getting much work done when Floyd was doing things such as this. Especially when it was a somewhat interesting spectacle. Azul rubs his temple, watching as Floyd stacks plate after plate atop your head while you happily sit there. 

“Oh! Azu, Azu!”

“Hm? What is it?” 

Azul's eyes look over at you with a light smile, Floyd still stacking plates on your head. You were smiling that smile that only you could smile, swaying a bit from side to side and making the plates teeter precariously. It made Azul anxious to watch and he lightly stopped your swaying with a gentle hand. 

You didn't pay much mind to Azul's hand and only continued on with what you were saying. “I read about this thing that land people do sometimes called a carnival.” Floyd stopped stacking plates on your head and looked down at you, a curious look in his eyes. Jade had stopped behind the booth where the other three were, eyebrow quirked in curiosity along with his twin. 

“Do you think we can go to one please? My classmates say that there’s one this weekend!”

Before Azul could get his opinion in, Floyd was already agreeing with you, babbling and clamoring next to you, throwing his arms around you while cheering that it was an awesome idea. 

That was how Azul’s weekend got taken up with going to the carnival. And also how he had to replace at least 10 plates after they came crashing down when Floyd hugged you. 

Azul could see that you and Floyd were looking around with childish glee, the only thing keeping you two around being Azul’s plea to stay within eye line of him and Jade. The sun was only just barely beginning to set, streaking golden lines over the sky and mixing blue with oranges and yellows. 

The carnival wasn’t all that bad, typical in look to what one would expect. There were game and food booths, varying enticing smells that made Azul’s mouth water and prizes that had you pointing them out everytime you passed by. 

“Look, look! It’s an octopus! Can we go get it, please?” 

The octopus plush was relatively small, big black eyes and little details under the tentacles for the suction cups. It was definitely cute at least, though Floyd was also grinning at Azul as he pointed at it. 

“Azul, it looks just like you! We should get it, hehe!” Azul rolled his eyes with a sigh, shaking his head. He pinched the bridge of his nose, glasses shifting up a bit. 

“Floyd, please...” 

“You know Floyd... You could try winning it.” Jade’s smile turned into a grin, sharp teeth on display as he looked at the booth with a smile. “I think it’ll be an interesting addition to the Mostro Lounge, don’t you think?” 

Azul groaned as Floyd rushed to the booth to play, eagerly giving the carney enough thaumarks for a turn to play. It was some game where you would have to knock down some milk glasses. The carny stood by the side as they gave Floyd some balls to throw at the stacked glasses. Azul sighed as his eyes roamed away from the tweels to see what you were up to. 

You, however, were not in the spot where you should have been. This made a bolt of anxiety shoot through Azul as his eyes swept across the crowds and booths. He knew he should have invested in one of those weird child leashes that he once saw. It wasn’t much different when he and the tweels would wrap seaweed around your waist to keep you from wandering too far from them. 

With a groan, Azul informed Jade of what he was doing and went into the crowd, weaving through people as his eyes darted from booth to booth, trying to find you among the masses. 

Azul’s eyes catch that purple and gold glow nearby a balloon darts booth, staring up at one of the prizes. The sight of you safe and sound helped alleviate Azul’s anxiety, though it didn’t stop the irritation of you suddenly up and disappearing. 

“What have we told you about wandering off? You know how dangerous it could be after the incident with the current and─” 

“Azu.” Your hand points to one of the carnival prizes, stars in your eyes. You were captivated by a set of match heart charm necklaces, colored gold that looked cheap. The strings of the necklace were only black strings even, one bad stress from fraying and falling apart. “I want them.”  

Azul gave you a scrutinizing look, eyebrows furrowed a bit. “Those are the most flimsy looking things ever.”

“But they say best friends on them! We have to get them!” Another look at them and the necklaces did, indeed, say best friends in small letters that were harder to read from where Azul was standing. 

Another look at you made Azul sigh, grabbing your wrist and walking over to the booth. He took out the required amount of thaumarks, placing it down on the counter. “Five darts please.”

You made a little cheer as the carny provided the darts to Azul, watching him pick up one of the darts and prepare to throw it. It would be easy, surely, it’s just aiming darts and popping balloons. 

His first dart falls short and falls to the floor. The second dart manages to hit a balloon, but not pop it. The third hits a balloon, thankfully. The fourth one hits, but doesn’t pop and the fifth somehow slips in between the balloons. The look of disbelief on Azul’s face is almost laughable, though your look of disappointment made Azul pull out another five thaumarks for another five darts. 

The second’s round’s results were the same as the first, either missing or slipping in between the cracks of the balloons. Another five thaumarks, another five darts, another round of failure. Azul groaned and dragged his hands down his face, feeling frustration begin to bubble under his skin. This damn game was getting annoying. 

Another five, another round, but Azul managed to get two balloons this time. He rubbed his temples. This was going to be more difficult than he thought. Azul took out another five thaumarks and received his five darts. 

This time, Azul takes a few moments to try and aim it, maybe hoping it’ll finally land for once. After what seemed like forever of aiming, steadying his arm, Azul throws the dart. He hears a pop and his heart jumps in excitement. You let out a small exclaim, clinging onto Azul’s arm as you watched him. The second dart, aim, steady, raise his hand just a bit, and throw the dart. Another pop. Pop after pop, the darts fly into the board and hit the balloons 

Finally, finally, the balloons popped, all the darts hitting their target. You cheered so loudly, jumping up and down and shaking Azul’s shoulder. “You did it, you did it, you did it!” 

A sense of relief runs through Azul, from finally popping those damn balloons and keeping his pride intact, but also being able to win those charm necklaces. It was an oddly nice feeling, watching as you excitedly point to those flimsy things, little freckled spots pulsing and glowing golden as the carny hands you the necklaces. You held them up to Azul, grin wide and chest full of laughter. 

“Azu! C’mere!” Despite what you said, you came closer to Azul, putting the necklace on for him and putting your own on. 

“We match, we match!” Azul watches as you point at his necklace and yours bouncing on the heels of your feet, smiling so bright. 

The rest of the trip was relatively fun, meeting back up with Jade and Floyd, who had won that octopus and more. Apparently he had decided he wanted all the plushes the carney had and took them. Whether through legitimate means or by other means, the tweels refused to elaborate. You managed to get the octopus off of Floyd and carried it around with you, Azul looping an arm with yours that helped him keep track of you as you tugged against his hold multiple times whenever you saw something that caught your eye. 

Eventually, you all had to go back to the dorms, though Floyd kept whining about how he wanted to stay longer. It was dark by the time you all returned and Azul sent you and the tweels to bed, heading to his room himself just as tired. 

As he was changing, Azul took off the charm necklace, inspecting it for a bit before taking out a container that he had kept full of coins and allowing the necklace into the container. The fake gold sheen contrasted with the coins of silver and gold, yet it felt just as precious.

[jamil-s-wifey]

Hello :3 Can I get a long scenario with my dearest Jamil?

I really love him so much >///< so here is my scenario, I hope you can accept

Jamil got sick and has a fever. MC stayed beside him and nursed him for 3 days without blinking and finally he recovered. He started to remember her care during his illness after his fever dropped. And when he woke up, MC hugged him tightly. A bit long, huh? 😅 I would be happy with little NSFW, not gonna lie.

Well hello there, fellow Jamil enthusiast~ It has certainly been a hot minute, hasn't it? It is my utmost pleasure to present you with the *long-awaited* scenario at hand! A bit of NSFW, some heart-warming fluff and Jamil finally getting a GODDAMN break, coming right up! It's not full on NSFW, just a lil bit, as requested, I don't know why it turned out like that- still, I hope this is good! (Tbh, it fits the scenario)

P.S. This hit close to home, I used to be a very sickly child and I still catch all sorta sicknesses a lot easier than normal people. So, what he will experience here is all based on very PERSONAL and very SALTY experience. 🙃

"What am I gonna do with you? You can't keep pushing yourself so much!" You murmured, pressing a cold cloth to Jamil's forehead as he slept soundly.

.......

Jamil hated being sick. Pretty normal right? Everybody hates being sick.

But to Jamil, sickness meant pushing through and continuing with his chores, regardless of his wellbeing. Imagine cooking above a hot stove with a high temperature. Can't be pleasant, can it?

But even the hardest stones could crack under enough force - such is the way the world works. It was towards the end of the day, as Jamil was preparing Kalim's dinner, when he felt his body give out under him. All day he'd been going around with a fever, he felt as if his own body was rotting on the inside, screaming at him to stop and have a break. His eyes were watery and felt as though they were burning in his eye sockets.

He couldn't even reach a chair to sit, before his knees buckled and he fell to the floor - too dizzy and too weak. Rarely did he ever get this sick, but this time it was bad. He moved to a more comfortable position and remained like that, trying to gather enough strength to get some medicine..... He most certainly didn't realise he'd fallen asleep, too tired to move, nor did he hear Kalim's worried voice when he found him on the floor in the kitchen.

And Kalim? Kalim was terrified! Quickly he called on his dorm members to move him to his room and immediately called you, crying on the phone, worried that Jamil might never wake up. (That's not how colds work, Kalim-) Worried about Jamil, you immediately rushed to the Scarabia dorm, medicine in hand.

_____________

And now here you are, in the present, taking extensive care of your near delirious not-quite-boyfriend-but-kinda-love-interest. He'd occasionally wake up and exchange barely audible pleasantries with you, drink his "extra healthy and full of good stuff" chicken soup (whatever that was supposed to entail) and then fall back into slumber. His fever has gone down drastically, but the utter exhaustion left in its wake has kept him bedridden. Apparently it was a seasonal fever, which just so happened to hit Jamil, who in turn chose to ignore it in the beginning.

You'd taken the liberty to remain situated in his room for about three days.

Day one was the worst - high fever, clattering teeth and a sleepless night to boot. You'd change his shirt every time he'd drench it in sweat whilst fighting off the fever. You'd switch up the cloth every time it lost its cooling effect, you'd remained by his side the entire time, least he needed something anything at all.

"Once you get better, I'm so gonna yell at you for not taking better care of yourself.... You're lucky I love you." You'd mumbled, barely audible in the quiet of the room as he slept.

Day two was better - he slept through most of it and you could in turn prepare some soup, as well as cover most of his chores, get a pass from the teachers AND even leave him some of your notes for when he recovers. (Look at you go! He'd better propose imo)

Now, on day three he was evidently much healthier. Finally he gave up trying to get out of bed, and instead lay resting, drinking his medicine, feeling utterly pampered by you.

_____________

"How long have you...been here?" You seemed pretty tired in his eyes. The moment you heard his voice you immediately threw yourself gently on him, gently crushing his bones in a hug.

"A while." You responded, face buried in his chest. In reality, you hadn't had a proper night of sleep in about 3 days. You DID sleep, Kalim even prepared a guest bedroom, but you chose to remain next to Jamil for most of the time. "Do you know how worried I was?"

"You didn't have to do all this, you know? You could've get sick too."

"I could've, but I haven't. For somebody with such a keen eye and monstrous deliberation, you really don't know how to take care of yourself properly." You quipped back, moving to sit on the bed next to him.

"As, so I'm being reprimanded now." His gaze softened. "Thank you....for taking care of me these last few days... I've forgotten what it's like to not have to worry or do anything... I feel like I've slept a lifetime... I don't know how I could possibly return the favour."

You can't stay mad at him. He knows it, you know it. Hell, even the Great Seven know it.

"Return it by recovering completely."

He chose not to continue the conversation. He knew arguing was pointless.

"You know, while I was sleeping, or trying to, I was mostly aware of what was happening around me." He began, pushing himself up, in a sitting position. "When you'd quietly hum to yourself, or cuss when you couldn't find something..."

"Ah- well, did you now? Sorry if you had a difficult time falling asleep because of me. " you felt your cheeks warm up a bit.

"No no, please. It's fine. You've taken such good care of me. I just... couldn't help but hear something, which perhaps I wasn't meant to."

He reached out, tangling his hand in your hair.

"Something about you loving me?"

...

Nope, all that heat in your cheeks? Gone. Now it was just coldness and dread.

He saw your frazzled state and chuckled. "I guess I'm really lucky, to have you to take *such* good care of me, huh."

He leaned in, but stopped just centimetres away.

"I shouldn't."

You heart dropped even lower, if that was even possible.

"I could get you sick.~" There was a lilt to his voice, but his eyes showed concern.

"Oh, for fuck's sake-" you leaned in, smashing your lips onto his. He smiled into the kiss, pulling you towards him.

Naturally, you moved to sit in his lap, his hands moving to your waist.

"Your feelings are returned, for the record." He mumbled in between heated kisses. The more heated the kisses became, the more his hands would wander until-

In the blink of an eye, he flipped you over, so that you were underneath him. Skillfully he unbuttoned the first few buttons of your uniform, revealing more of your neck and collarbones. "I think I have a way of returning the favour. You took such good care of me, I think it's my turn~"

His attention moved to your neck, leaving heated languid kisses and playful bites on your skin. His hand trailed down to spread your legs, moving between them. Every single touch of his was intoxicating. Pretty quickly your shirt was thrown on the floor, the supple flesh underneath - covered in hickeys.

"Are you not going to undress as well? Or should I do that for you?" you asked, breathless, yet teasing in manner. Well. As teasing as one could get, given how achingly turned on you were. "Like you didn't have more than enough time to appreciate the view, during these last few days." he teased right back, but his hands moved to grip the hem of his t-shirt, pulling it over his head.

"I've wanted to do this for a long time." He practically purred, fingers gliding over your stomach, gently trailing lower and lower.

"Of course, you can tell me to stop anytime."

"I don't want you to."

"As you wish, my dear. Then I'll make sure to indulge, taking, tasting, touching every single part of you. "

[otakubimbo]

You Don't Know Me

Gojo x F! Reader

You're just some hot bimbo who needs help with their advanced college classes right?

Context: Cussing. Misunderstanding. Typical Gojo Behavior. College AU. No curse.

next

Today was the beginning of your sophomore year of college. You would probably be more excited about this if you weren’t lost, again. Your newfound friend, Shoko Ieiri, just showed you how to get to all your classes this semester. The two of you became fast friends over the summer since you were both pre-med and had taken the same summer classes. You found her hilarious and cool, and she enjoyed your positive and calm personality. Just last week, she showed you around all the buildings you were supposed to be at for your classes because if there is one thing people can say about you is that you are directionally challenged. No matter what it seemed that you were always getting lost, that’s even how you initially met Shoko because you were lost and luckily, she was going to the same classroom as you.

Reluctantly, you reach into your pocket pulling out your phone and hitting her contact.

“You’re lost, aren’t you?” She didn’t even bother with the pleasantries and got straight to business.

“No!” You started and you could hear her try not to laugh at you on the other end of the line, “It’s just that I wanted to make sure that I knew exactly where the building was at, ya know, a second opinion some may say.”

“Hmmn, a second opinion? Alright,” She takes a drag of her cigarette. Who the hell starts smoking before 8 am? “Where are you right now?”

You look around at any landmark you could use to give her your location, “By the dining hall.”

She sighed, and you knew you weren’t even close to the right building “You need to be near the library, which is on the other side of campus.”

You groan, realizing that you’re going to be late on your first day. You hated being late, even if professors gave students a pass on the first couple of days to navigate around campus, you prided yourself on your punctuality despite your inability to figure out how to get where you are going.

“Alright. Got it. Thanks, Shoko.” You say as you begin your long walk to the other side of campus.

“Yeah yeah. We still on for lunch?”

“Yeah of course. You know I got that 11 am physics but after I’m free.”

“Cool, so around 12? Yeah? You gonna need help finding it?” She teases and you roll your eyes even if she can’t see you.

“Bye Shoko.”

“Bye,” She laughs before hanging up.

Eventually, you make your way across campus only a few minutes late, not even missing the 5-minute grace period. Even with the directions that you were given, when you enter the lecture hall you do look around a bit confused just to make sure you were in the right location.

“You look lost, pretty. I don’t think you’re in the right place.” Your eyes shift to the voice coming up behind you. Your brow furrowed because you thought you would be able to follow these basic directions Shoko gave you. You look back at your phone and your schedule just to make sure. The white-haired man in front of you scans over your body from head to toe while you look. You had a figure that a lot of women would pay for, and you weren’t shy about flaunting it. Currently, you were in a pair of low-rise jeans, thong showing of course, with a V-neck crop top that displayed multiple chest tattoos on which a letterman jacket sat on your shoulders. Your hair was in a slicked-back bun that had your coils neatly tucked away in the back, a fresh dye job of a dark purple. Every inch of visible body parts was shimmering brown from what must be some sort of body butter you used which made you smell like heaven, a mixture of cinnamon and vanilla.

He thought you were stunning and just knew a pretty girl like you couldn’t be in the same organic chemistry class he was taking. Especially with the way you looked, a girl who looks like you, like a bimbo, on top of the fact you looked absolutely lost.

You finally looked up from your phone, catching his eyes wandering your body but brushing it off because of course he was,

“No this is definitely it, I’m sure of it.” Your words did not come out as confident as you wanted them to, “This is advanced organic chem with Professor Sho right?” You bite your lip hoping that you were right so you wouldn’t have to go looking for the correct hall. His eyes widened at you in surprise when you said what class you were looking for.

“Yeah, this is it.” He says in a confused tone which makes you a bit confused, but you brush it off.

“Whew great.” You say and turn to go take a seat in the middle of the lecture hall. You were so happy you made it to the correct place. The middle was the best place for you, since you had accommodation that allowed you to record the lectures and it was best if you sat in the middle. If you sat in the back sometimes the audio would cut out on some parts and sitting too close sometimes gave feedback, so you found sitting in the middle to be the perfect spot for you.

As the professor begins his lecture, you are in your little world that you didn’t notice that boy you spoke to earlier watching you over your shoulder. Something about you intrigued him, you weren’t even paying attention, just doodling in your notebook not taking down a single note. Yeah, he wasn’t either but that’s because everything came so naturally to him that he would be fine regardless. On top of the fact that you didn’t even attempt to fawn over him when he spoke to you, all you cared about was whether you were in the right class or not.

After the lecture was over, you grabbed your things and stopped by the boy you met earlier to thank him again.

“Oh hey” you call to him getting his attention, he looks up at you while he’s packing his stuff. “Thanks again for letting me know I was in the right place, I’m terrible with directions. Kaneko, by the way.” You extend your hand out to him.

He smirks up at you, finally, you were going to give him the attention he just knew he deserved from you. “No problem, Gojo.” He reaches out and shakes your hand. You grin back at him. “Well, see you are. Bye” you say letting his hand go and waving to leave. Now he was left, stunned by your absence because surely you had come over to flirt with him. But no, you just wanted to thank him and then left. He was left watching your hips twitch in those too-tight jeans, gazing at the rhinestone of your thong leaving the doors of the lecture hall. Did you think you were out of his league or something? He had looks and brains, no way was he out of your league. This annoyed him to no end, and you had no clue what you even started with him.

Luckily, for you, you were able to find your next class with no problem and by that you mean you asked someone beforehand while you were getting your morning coffee, and they gave you impeccable directions. So, you were in high spirits by the time you met Shoko for lunch at the dining hall.

“Aye Meya” Shoko calls to you for you to come have a seat with her already at a table. You happily bounce your way over to her table.

“How do you always manage to look so great even when you have 8 ams?” she asks in an annoyed joking tone.

“Every morning when I wake up, I think to myself ‘What if I died right now? What kind of outfit would I want to be stuck in for the rest of my life’ that’s how I get the energy to put myself together in the morning. The last thing I want is to be an ugly ghost.”

This made Shoko almost shoot her drink out of her nose as she laughed at you.

The two of you enjoy the rest of your lunch together and then separate to continue your respective schedules. This is the routine that you two keep for about a month or so now and midterms are coming up soon. During this time, little did you know that Gojo's interest was getting more piqued on you. The two of you only said the occasional ‘hi’ when you saw each other in class but that was it. He wanted so badly to have a conversation with you, but you never seemed the least bit interested but today would hopefully be different. As you leave the lecture hall for your morning coffee Gojo stops you.

“Oh hey, what’s up Gojo?” You ask, taking your AirPod out of your ear, and smiling at him.

“I just wanted to ask if you needed a tutor or anything for the midterm coming up?” he asks nonchalantly with his hands in his pocket. Your brow furrows as you look at him confused.

“No, I think I’m good.” You giggle. Why would you need a tutor? The lowest grade you had gotten in this class so far was an A- but he didn’t know that.

“You sure? I really don’t mind.” He attempts to insist, hoping that you’ll let him.

“Yes, I’m sure. Thanks, though I guess.” You say beginning to walk away putting your AirPod back in.

“Wait” He stops you again, “Are you being tutored by someone else?”

Now you were starting to get a bit irritated but not trying to let it show because maybe he was just trying to be nice and there’s no reason to be mad about that.

“No. I’m not but again thanks for the offer. I gotta go.” You say as politely as you can, giving him a small smile as you leave making an exaggerated movement in putting your AirPod back in, in hopes he doesn’t ask again. He sighs frustrated as he watches you leave.

“There’s no way she can’t be interested in me” Gojo complains to his best friend, Geto Suguru, in their shared apartment, flopping onto his bed.

“Are you talking about the girl in organic chem class?” Geto asks kind of uninterested, focusing on his own studies since again midterms were coming up.

“Of course, no one else is worth my time. Kaneko Meya”

Geto puts his pen down after hearing him say your name, “That name sounds familiar actually.”

“Like you know her familiar?” Gojo asks shooting up from his position on the bed.

“More like, know of. Hold on horn dog, let me see something” Geto remarks as he pulls out his phone pulling up instagram to scroll trying to find what he was looking for. “Bingo.”

Gojo suddenly appears over his friend’s shoulder. It was a picture of Shoko at some type of restaurant with the caption “On a date kind of nervous <3” and Shoko was tagged in it. The original poster is none other than you, TheGirlY/N.

“She’s dating fucking Shoko?!?!” Gojo yells in despair. Geto laughs at him as he keeps scrolling. “No, she isn’t look.” He shows Gojo the comments.

ChainSmokerShoko: Meya stop saying this! This is why I can’t get a girlfriend!

TheGirlY/N: No, it’s fun and this isn’t why you can’t get a girlfriend. Love you bestie! <3

ChainSmokerShoko: REPORTED

Gojo sighs in relief when he realizes that you aren’t dating Shoko but now he had to find a way to convince Shoko on how to get to know you better. He grabs his own phone to pull up your IG and scroll through it. There were a lot of photos like the one Geto showed him that had pictures of Shoko across from you at a table with similar captions, “just having dinner with the loml’ ‘me and bae out of the town’ and each one with Shoko complaining and you laughing her off. Other pictures were of just you, cute selfies, photos of you during summer, pictures of your notes and aesthetically pleasing set ups. You took part in thirst trap Thursdays a lot it seemed. Fuck, you were absolutely gorgeous to him.

“She is definitely out of your league. No wonder she won’t let you tutor her.” Geto teases as he’s also going through your IG.

“I’m probably the hottest guy on campus, we are in the same league” He scoffs turning back to his own phone.

“Did she even ask for tutoring?”

“No but look at her, and plus all she does in class is doodle and look frustrated. AND this is advance organic chem, there’s no way she doesn’t need help.”

“You shouldn’t judge a book by its cover Satoru.”

“Yeah, whatever” Gojo says before he decides to follow you on IG.

The funny thing about it is that Geto had met you before, at a meeting with the National Honors Society. You had a GPA that was higher than his and Gojos but he wasn’t going to tell his friend that, he was going to have to learn the hard way. Especially since you were the only reason that Shoko wasn’t failing out of her pre-med classes, you saved her during the summer break and if anything, you should be tutoring Gojo.

You always took it easy on the week of the midterms to not stress yourself out in every way, you can’t retain information on a stressed brain. But Gojo knew there was no way you were going to pass the midterm so that would be his opportunity to swoop in and assist you with helping get your grade up.

Now midterms were over and as always you got in class early, already doodling on a piece of paper while you waited for class to start. You knew that you would be going over the midterm today, so you don’t have your usual setup out since there weren’t going to be any lecture notes to copy down.

“Hey Y/L”

You hear Gojos voice as he takes the seat beside you, which you find a bit strange since he always sits in the back, but you don’t mind.

“Hey Gojo” You softly smile at him as you continue your doodles. You were just doing some chibi art today, confident in your grade from the midterm.

“How did you think you did on the midterm?” He asks you to try and gauge if you were concerned or not.

“Eh I’m sure I did fine.” You shrug casually. Yes, you were confident, but it wouldn’t matter what grade you got, it just matters what you do after. You didn’t stress but you strived to be better always.

“Well, I’m sure I aced it” He says cockily grinning at you. You just nod your head at him unimpressed with his boisterousness. “How about we both look at ours the same time when they get handed back?” He comments trying to get more out of you.

You give him a small giggle that makes his eyes light up, the sound was music to his ears, “Sure, if you want to” The idea to you was silly but why the hell not.

As soon as the midterms were handed back out, both you and Gojo had yours facing down until the professor said to look over it and if you had any questions today was the day to ask, as he would be going over anything people didn’t understand.

“Alright, you ready” Gojo asks, hoping that you would beg him to tutor you once you saw his higher grade.

“Ready” You giggle at him and the two of you flip your papers over at the same time. A wide smile spreads upon your face as you see the A + plastered at the top, all the chemical compounds that you doodled repeatedly coming to being usual, you had them memorized by muscle memory. You look over at Gojos paper and see that he received a B+, which is still a great grade.

“You did good. Good job” you say earnestly smiling at him, but all Gojo heard was condescension.

“You got a better grade than me?” Gojo says more to himself than to you.

“Well I mean — “You start before he cuts you off.

“How did you get a better grade than me?” He continues and your smile drops from your face, he didn’t even let you answer before he starts ranting. “All I ever see you doing is doodling in that fucking notebook of yours. I was even trying to get to tutor you because I just knew you needed help and was going to fail.”

You were immediately taken aback, why would he say that to you? He didn’t even know you.

“What?” You question, your voice breaking a little.

He looks at you, angrily “Are you fucking the professor?”

“Excuse you?” You must have heard him wrong because there’s no way he just asked you that.

“That’s why you’re always dressed like that. You must be fucking him 'cause there’s no way you got an A + on this hard-ass midterm and did better than me.” He spits as he snatches your mid-term, comparing the answers. Your body moves on its own as you stand up, the tears threatening to escape. Your arm goes back and you punch him square in the jaw, usually, you would be against hitting someone but the rage and hurt that just came over you had your body moving on autopilot. At the sound of your fist connecting with his jaw everyone’s head turned in your direction as blood flew out of his mouth.

Your body was shaking with rage, “you do not FUCKING know me. I worked hard for that grade you condescending prick. I’m sorry that your walnut sized brain can’t comprehend someone who looks like me getting better grades than you. Get the fuck over yourself. Do not EVER speak to me again, don’t even LOOK at me again. Fuck you, you blue eyed freak.”

You grabbed everything but your notebook that had fallen when you got up to punch him and ran out of the lecture hall. You knew Shoko didn’t have a class right now, so you make your way to your shared apartment trying your best to hold back your tears until you get there. Unfortunately for you, you get lost on your way there. Fuck. You think you’re on the wrong side of campus when you quickly turn around running into someone.

“Oh Shit. I’m sorry. Excuse me.” You get out trying not to meet whoever you ran into gaze.

“Y/L?” the person asks, holding your shoulders gently. It was Geto.

“Oh, hi Geto right?.” You meet his eyes, and his face grows concerned as he nods at you. “I was just trying to get to my friend Shokos apartment, can you help me? If not that’s fine, I’m sorry to bother you. I just…. Im just… a bit lost.”

He can tell that you are on the verge of tears, you look completely lost and not just directionally, “Yeah sure, she’s a friend of mine too I know exactly where that is.”

He doesn’t ask you what’s wrong just guides you to Shokos apartment. When you get there, you immediately throw yourself into her arms and try not to cry just yet until you’re sure that Geto leaves.

“Y/N?? What happened? What’s wrong?” She asks rubbing your back, death staring at Geto.

“I didn’t do it. I just walked her here.” He says hands up in surrender.

“Yeah, I ran out of class and got lost trying to find your apartment and ran into Geto. He said you were friends, so he helped me here.” You confess into her shirt before turning to Geto, “Thank you by the way.”

“No problem,” He says awkwardly for a second before checking the many notifications that he received on his phone while walking you here.

Seven missed calls from Stupid Satoru

Text From Stupid Satoru:

I fucked up. Fucked up big time. Call me back! Please!

“I gotta go. I’ll catch you later Shoko and Kaneko.” He says giving you a sad smile before he leaves. Once the door is closed, you immediately break down into Shokos arms.

“Hey, calm down. What happened?” She questioned between your sobs.

“I punched him and then I cussed him out in front of the whole class. Now everyone’s going to think i’m some crazy monster I already have enough trouble as it is because it seems like no one ever wants to talk to me but he just made me so upset. I just did it before I could even think. Then I ran out of class and then I got lost. Luckily I bumped into Geto, I didn’t even know you were friends and he got me here.” You say feeling better after your little crying spell, wiping your tears.

“You punched someone? Who? You’re not exactly telling me what happened.” She asked, her voice full of concern.

“Remember the guy I told you about who kept insisting he tutor me?”

“Yeah, I remember. That shit was weird.”

“Well, we got our midterms back and I got an A+” you say and Shoko cuts you off with congratulations, she saw how hard you were studying for the test, you barely left your apartment for a week. “He got a B+ on his and I don’t know why he was so upset that I got better than him, but he was. He said there was no way that someone who looks like me should have gotten a better score than him, claimed I don’t pay attention in class, and that I must be sleeping with the professor to have gotten such a good grade.”

“He said what?!”

“Yeah and that’s when I punched him” You say with your head down, Shoko squishes your face with both of her hands making you look at her.

“As you should of” She says proudly, she knows you are more of the docile type especially since you actually did know how to fight, you didn’t like using your strength on others unless for self-defense.

“Do I look dumb, Shoko? I dress this way because I like too, and I know I can come off as a bimbo sometimes especially since I’m bad at directions but do I seem dumb? I don’t want people to think I’m dumb, especially not to think I sleep with professors for good grades. I try so hard, you know that, and I just have finally gotten comfortable with myself….” you trail off unable to finish your thoughts, you just felt like complete shit.

“No, you’re just hot and confident and that idiot is an idiot. I know how smart you are. Shit you’ve helped me study with your immaculate notes all summer, you’re one of the smartest people I know. Being hot doesn’t make you dumb, that’s just a stupid stereotype, and the fact that he believes that is idiotic.” She attempts to comfort you.

“But then I cursed him out, said he had the brain the size of a walnut, told him never to talk to me again, and called him a blue-eyed freak.” You confess with a sigh, you really didn’t like how mean you were even if he deserved it.

“And he deserved it… Wait you called him a what?” She blinks at you a few times, hoping and praying you aren’t talking about who she thinks you’re talking about.

“A blue-eyed freak…. I know it was mean, but he started with me first and just….” You trail off, now feeling horrible about what you said.

“No, no, I get it. I would have said worse. It’s just that…. What was his name?” She asks through gritted teeth.

“Gojo Satoru”

[mewmewpercy]

Psychology Student Analyses Dr. Ratio

Okay I've been meaning to do this one forever because mischaracterisation goes crazy about this man and I gotta correct some facts.

Dr. Ratio is a very blunt person. He sounds harsh and doesn't mince words. He seems almost self-centred and cocky in a way. That is until you actually look into what he's saying and how he talks to others.

I've talked about him before specifically in regards to his role in the 1.6 update. He's a foil to Ruan Mei meant to show empathy in the scholarly field. His bluntness and cold voice versus her over explanation at times and soft voice. The entire point of him sounding as cold as he does is to put an emphasis on actually paying attention to what he says and how he acts.

In 1.6 while Ruan Mei has the entire space station at risk with her swarm experimentation Ratio's mini investigation about the Everflame Mansion situation was done without anybodies knowledge lest they be at risk.

The entire reason he's in the Intelligensia Guild rather than the Genius Society is because he cares about spreading his smarts across the cosmos. He doesn't want people to be stupid because it's not good to be unawares so he's strict and maintains an air of harshness to impress what he deems necessary for people he's around to know.

People love to bash the English dub of him because he sounds harsh but if I'm going to be completely honest he's far from harsh. He's blunt and strict and won't mince his words but he's not mean like people make him out to be. I quite commend Jordan Paul Haro for his performance because of the way he brings Ratio to life. With the borderline pretentious tone he has it mean you truly have to listen to his words not his voice which is something many people fail to do.

Take this line for example. Many think he's being cold and rude but let's think about him and his character for a second. He shows his care in his bluntness. He doesn't enjoy putting on performances for anybody. In my opinion what he's saying is that he wants Aventurine to worry about himself(because we all know how that guy is) and to stop pretending with his over the top and super extra way he acts around people. He's saying he wants him to focus on himself and stop pretending all the time.

All in all Dr. Ratio is a pretty cool guy. He cares about people by spreading what he knows and doesn't bother with false pleasantries and lies. He's not a cold-hearted jerk he's just a guy who doesn't show very much emotion because he deems it unnecessary.

[clairdelunelove]

next to you

itadori yuuji x reader

genre: fluff! (classmate!yuuji & transferstudent!reader)

warnings: none

synopsis: the thought of moving schools was disheartening. memorizing a different schedule, acquainting yourself with new people, and leaving your friends behind were factors that you did not look forward to. yet, when you're seated next to a blushy haired male with a sweet smile– you decide that you could get used to it.

a.n. I recently went to an anime convention and got a pic with the cutest itadori cosplayer ever! and unknowingly, upon checking my phone at home, saw that they gave me bunny ears in the pic! so hi jjk fandom! pls take care of me! (∩˃o˂∩)♡

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head very full at the thought of itadori yuuji showing you around campus and can't help but have his interest pique at your arrival.

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moving schools in the middle of the semester was a relatively difficult obstacle to overcome. it was unfortunate. the loss of packing up the life that you had grown into. you missed your old friendships– the ones that had you beaming when you caught a glimpse of your best friend waiting at the school gates or stifling a laugh from their silly jokes during class. initiating conversation was never your strong suit, either. words felt sticky on your lips and you instinctively shut down after the usual pleasantries were said. you felt awkward; and the sentiment radiated off of you in waves which, coincidentally, turned people away. so to say that you weren’t necessarily excited to be acquainted with your professors and classmates was an understatement. you had a new campus to explore, aloof introductions to give, and schedules to memorize. with each passing second your enthusiasm wavered. a frown tugs at your lips as you take a seat at your desk. but when you get a glimpse of golden skin, a beaming smile, and pretty brown eyes— you have a sneaking suspicion that moving wasn’t too terrible. 

classmate!yuuji that puts in the effort to introduce himself to you right when you walk in. he’s extremely polite; a trait that you gather from how he leans over to bow his head to you. almost knocks over his desk from how quick his movements are. light brown eyes flickering to you, his curiosity gets the best of him once the spot next to him is occupied. “looks like my desk partner is here!” he hums while swinging his long legs in your direction so he can directly address you. “itadori yuuji,” he clarifies with a friendly smile, “pleasure to meet you!” and immediately you can tell that he’s charming in the way that has you warming under his vigilant gaze. soft eyes and tender intentions. you straighten in your seat to appear more inviting. hoping to garner a good first impression. anything to catch the interest of your new classmate. and when you introduce yourself through flustered stutters and pauses, he doesn’t seem to mind. no, yuuji just reaches over, slender fingers pointing at the strap of your backpack, and mentions, “cool keychain, by the way.” it’s a clay figure you molded for yourself as a tribute to your favorite- yet totally obscure- movie so the compliment causes your heart to flip at the acknowledgement. can already tell that he’ll be the highlight of your day. and when yuuji hears your sheepish yet overjoyed, “thanks. can't believe you know where it's from,” a beguiling grin curls upon his lips. 

classmate!yuuji that takes the time to show you around the campus even if he’s late to club tryouts. despite his incredible athleticism, he’s not interested in joining any of the school’s clubs but the tryouts were fun. just a small event that brought the school together while crowds of upperclassmen coerced others to become involved. yuuji recalled agreeing to coming out to the track club’s tryouts; probably using his record speed as a persuasion tactic and he didn’t want to go back on his word. yet, he had a small task to take care of first. “and this is where your last class is,” he gestures with a broad smile. he’s currently walking backwards with his hands stuffed in his pockets while you trailed beside him. a couple students actively greeted him and he returned the sentiment with a nonchalant wave or quick fist-bump. the epitome of cool that you could only dream of. fortunately, you both shared a majority of classes together so he’d be there if you ever needed anything. he watches you jot down a careful note on the back of your binder to indicate the location before quickly expressing your gratitude, “thanks so much. really, you’ve helped me so many times today.” it’s true, he’d walked you across the whole campus and pointed out any rooms you may need in the future. his shoulders lift in a shrug, though, like it’s merely common courtesy, “'ts no problem.” his kindness causes a smile to curl upon your lips as you suggest, “is there anything I can do to pay you back? maybe buy you lunch sometime?” it’s a little forward, for your standards, but you can’t help but feel indebted to him. he took your nervousness and transformed it into comfort. unbeknownst to you, yuuji’s battling his own predicament because the light filtering through the window causes you to illuminate. a glowing halo surrounding you. you’re so angelic– long lashes fluttering when you tilt your head up at him. he gulps and clears his throat, “sorry, what was that?” his voice is sheepish and the tone is a little odd coming from someone so assured like he is. can sense the tips of his ears burning at the realization that the transfer student is unfairly pretty. so he shifts his feet while naively confessing, “it’s a little hard to think when you look at me like that.” 

classmate!yuuji that thinks you’re the smartest person he’s ever known. you could be instructing him on how to solve a problem incorrectly but he’d always take your word that you’re right. will gasp and murmur, “oh, I gotta do it like that? got it.” and scribbles down the rest of his answers like how you showed him. gets defensive if someone else rudely tells you that you’re wrong for following a different format. his brows would furrow, bewildered when the blame is automatically placed on you since you were the transfer student. “(y/n) taught me this way and I got it right,” he’d mention while pressing his lips together, “so both ways work. nothin’ wrong with that.” the finality of his words usually do the trick to shut down any arguments. you even end up spending more time with yuuji outside of class. he’ll find you in some desolate corner of the library, buried in a textbook, and ends up canceling his plans so he can study with you. strolls in with a beaming smile and a quick wave of his hand. lightly chuckles when he recognizes how you hastily tidy your miscellaneous papers and pens. however, your studying sessions become a bit more talkative whenever he drops in. eagerly chatting about the latest tv shows that he’s been watching. “I like that one a lot too,” a smile graces your face as you clasp your hands together, “can’t wait for the new season to come out. I think it’s coming out in a couple months. april, maybe?” “yeah, april!” yuuji repeats and presses the tip of his pen to his lips while pondering, “wonder if the villain will come back during that time.” it’s irrational but seemingly minor moments like these were significant to you. and a pleased warmth spread within you at the fact that you shared some hobbies with your blushy haired classmate. if exams rolled around, though, the two of you put immense effort into studying. with yuuji dutifully reading his textbook next to you, you’re about to commit to your own studying when he lets out a sudden exhale, “this is so boring! I can’t do this.” he shifts in his seat, trying to get more comfortable, but unknowingly knocks his knee against yours. you’re giggling at his dilemma, however. “maybe you need a break or I could try helping. is it science?” it’s phrased like a question because you’re uncertain of how much help you’d be. yet, he defeatedly slouches in his seat and huffs, “help, please. you’re the smartest person I know.” and when you turn to him, you’re greeted by his wide, puppy-dog eyes for good measure. “woah,” you grin while gently pushing at his face, “don’t need to pull that move on me, mister.” yuuji yelps, reaching up to enclose his hand over yours before gleefully laughing, “it’s my secret weapon though!” and the rest of the session is filled with teasing smiles, soft nudges, and knowing hushes. 

classmate!yuuji that greets you, without fail, every morning. he could be slouched over, scrolling through his phone, or idly chatting with friends– just occupied in his own circle of friends. it only took you a week to recognize that your blushy haired classmate was quite popular amongst your colleagues. well, he’s not necessarily labeled as ‘popular,’ but rather favored and admired. yuuji’s known to step in and dissolve petty arguments between other students or help a teacher without squabbling. carrying and passing out heavy textbooks to different classes with a polite smile. it was difficult to find someone that outwardly disliked him. no one had a reason to. students, upperclassmen and underclassmen alike, flocked to him whenever there were openings in school clubs. but he always gently declines with a dismissive wave of his hand before returning to flip through his comic book. yet, when you come scampering in the class, he visibly perks up. and as embarrassing as it is, your classmates know that whatever they utter to yuuji will just go over his head when you walk in. his bright eyes land on you as you settle in the seat next to him. “hey!” he greets with a tilt of his head, “g’morning!” right when you turn to him, he slides the book closed and rests his chin on his hand. gives you his undivided attention. the movement causes your eyes to catch that the sleeves of his dark sweatshirt are tugged upward and you knowingly shake your head. “don’t tell me you helped rearrange the desks before class again,” you teasingly chastised with an intentional glance to his calloused hands, “but good morning, yuu.” already your closest friend, the nickname for him was only natural. and yuuji never deterred you from using it– if anything, he was fond of it. causes a smile to break upon his face. it seemed like you caught him because he abruptly pulled away to scratch at the back of his neck, “hm, I had to.” then, he scoots closer to you before explaining with a playful grin, “besides, sensei let me keep the spot next to you because of it.” and as you desperately attempt to fight off the heat that floods your face, yuuji just shoots you another sweet smile.