#please ignore this

[bleedingthroughteeth]

pink sphere pngs

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[nico00235]

i did this while i was high truly a fever dream i had once For the, macaque is saying "OH MY GOD PLEASE SAVE ME IS TOO MUCH"

[cakesmelons]

I've come to make an announcement: Kai @elizakai is a bitch-ass motherfucker. He pissed on my fucking Dream sans. That's right. He took his hedgehog fuckin' quilly dick out and he pissed on my FUCKING Dream sans, and he said his dick was THIS BIG, and I said that's disgusting. So I'm making a callout post on my Tumblr.com. Kai @elizakai, you got a small dick. It's the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like. That's right, baby. Tall points, no quills, no pillows, look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. He fucked my Dream sans, so guess what, I'm gonna fuck the earth. That's right, this is what you get! My SUPER LASER PISS! Except I'm not gonna piss on the earth. I'm gonna go higher. I'm pissing on the MOOOON! How do you like that, OBAMA? I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT! You have twenty-three hours before the piss DROPLETS hit the fucking earth, now get out of my fucking sight before I piss on you too!

[total-drama-brainrot]

uh. something something, dog imagery?

i don't know, i haven't slept in, like, 36 hours. cut me some slack.

[lovelybunn]

south park post covid main 4 w/ you in a revealing bikini ! 🍹˚ ༘

warning(s): uses of prns she/her, fem!reader, lowkey a crack post, swearing, suggestive themes

author's note: i'm pretty late to the party (and this was just stuck in my drafts) so i decided to post it now, hope you enjoy!

stan marsh

his swimming trunks don't ever fit him, either they're squeezing his balls off or they're so loose that he will almost flash some poor innocent family

"alcohol-free" by twice but with the alcohol

i mean, stan's like wasted on like five margaritas before he sees you, and when he does... oh, HOOCHIE MAMA!!

ok but fr, the moment this pot belly man sees you in that cute ass swimsuit, he is ALL OVER you.

he's gon grab you from behind and give you all kinds of sloppy neck kisses

"you're so sexy baby. i love you~"

did i forget to add that's he's an ass man?

"🎶 take that, rewind it back, usher got the voice to make your booty go– SMACK!"

ㅤ

kyle broflovski

leanly built kyle broflovski me thinks...

the only one who actually reacted like a normal grown individual out of the four of them 😐

if you have any body dysmorphia, this man will make sure you love your body just as much as he does.

don't get me wrong, he did show you off, but that was more of him making a declaration of "that's all mine, and you wish she was yours."

his hands most definitely will be glued to your hips/waist (his favorite part of your body)

anytime someone would look at you in a flirtatious way/quite literally flirt with you, he would instantly give that signature "i'm tired of your shit.™" kyle broflovski look.

forehead kisses and CONSTANT compliments

trust me, he loves the way that fabric hugs all your yummy curves 😋

ㅤ

eric cartman

this cutie patootie was shocked to see you in that. (calling cartman of all ppl that makes me want to vomit)

he tried his so very hardest to cover you up, with towels, a cover-up, his own swim-shirt, but you took it all off bc ofc you did.

istg he almost cussed a mf out for cat-calling you, he was fighting the urge to keep the true eric theodore cartman deep inside

he would hold your hand the whole time like if he let go you would vanish out of thin air lmao XD

weird headcanon, but i think eric loves seeing your hair down and wet, like all that water dripping down your body really turns him on

sunbathing is his fav past-time when going to the beach/pool

LIKE IF Y'ALL ARE TANNING TOGETHER, LAY ON HIS BIG OL TUMMY, IT'S WORTH IT ISTG, ITS LIKE A PILLOW

also cartman can't swim for shit so he stays in the shallowest part of the water at ALL TIMES. (come on, you don't wanna see his old ass drown, do you?)

ㅤ

kenny mccormick

kenny man bun, kenny man bun, KENNY MAN BUN (but fr, he doesn't like getting his hair wet so he puts it up every time y'all go to the beach/pool)

you just had to pick out a bikini that would show the most amount of cleavage, didn't you?

my man's eyes must've POPPED out of their damn sockets like a cartoon character when he saw that shit

"ah that's hot, that's hot."

every chance this dude gets he's gon come up to you like "madam, your breasts look awfully heavy, shall i hold them for you?"

but enough about kenny's obsession with boobs, i honestly feel like he'd be all kinds of lovey-dovey the whole time

hugging you, kissing you, feeling you all over,I'm pretty sure you'll have to literally bitch-slap kenny cuz this man will be attached to your hip like a tumor

also, you know that hawaiian shirt he always wears (that probably hasn't been washed in 6 months)? yeah, that thing will stay on his body the whole time unless he's in the water. but it's unbuttoned ofc, he isn't trying to die of heat stroke bruv 😕

[natashasregrets]

no i’m not GAY i just want to dress like a fucking 1900s NEWSBOY and wear a fucking NEWSBOY CAP and BRITCHES and get girls to like me IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK

[fernsandsunflowers]

Ok hear me out. This might not make sense because I’m not in my right mind now for several reasons. But what if aguefort did program grix and warn him about the bad kids because something went wrong with the time quangle thing and aguefort (and aura) is now like evil. Like does that? What say you my boo? Like

[aviscarrentals]

sex with a blindfold except i’m wearing two eyepatches like a pirate instead

[lonelypinecove]

Meow but like, in a canine sorta way

Like a dog loafing sorta way

Like a dog making biscuits sorta way

[heeheehoohoo8]

Fictional characters make me horny for the stupidest things like oh your leather glove is so well tailored that I can see the outline of your thumbnail gee thanks I’m inconsolable now

[sunnydbeam]

I detest the self-destructive country I live in. I wish I could run far away and live quietly under a fucking rock.

[dykecubes]

Rendog my failgirl pookie bear

[miss-plum]

tw: negative / death / sickness

My stepmom wants me to sign my dads patient’s provision soon, he’s in a special-care home now because he keeps wandering off and regressing fast, all of this hits too close to home.

[bigtruckluver]

on the note of sans fanart i love when people draw realistic sans. like yes girl now im gonna think about the model skeleton in my first period. anyway

[total-drama-brainrot]

for alenoah week's free day i'm drawing alejandro in the bong alongside alien cody

[stellarcoachman]

I fucking hate working with contagious diseases. I fucking hate when people lie to make themselves look better and end up causing things to spread more. I fucking hate when people refuse to vaccinate, or actively expose their fucking animals to diseases, then blame me when they get sick. I fucking hate when people scream at me that I don't care about animals because I can't cure an incurable disease. I fucking hate when people laugh at me dressed in PPE to protect their pet, when they act like it's such an overreaction, then cry two days later when their dog dies because they refused treatment, because "it doesn't seem that serious." I fucking hate contagious diseases. I don't work at an ER so I don't have to deal with this shit, and yet here we fucking are. I'm so tired.