#please let amir join the fun

[itsswimmingtragedycollection]

The Dumpster Fire that is ‘The Order’

First of all, why is his show labeled as a horror? My humble guess is that it was intended for younger audiences?? I genuinely wanna know. Because, even if it was for teens, some blood and a few dead bodies does not a horror make.  Secondly, what the fuck? And I truly mean that.  I mean, the idea itself doesn’t sound bad at all. A college student joins a secret society and finds out his supposedly evil dad is the head of it? He’s also in a werewolf club that fights that same secret society? Sign me tf up. But the execution just takes a really weird turn.  From the get go, you kinda aren’t sure if the show wants to be takes seriously or not. And that question is never answered. Literally in the opening scene the letter changes from ‘we regret to inform you’ to ‘congratulations’ in front of Jack’s eyes and he has absolutely no reaction whatsoever to that peculiar development, which kind of screams ‘not to be taken seriously’ similarly to the whole ‘My evil dad killed my mom so naturally I’m gonna join a secret society, become someone important and powerful and eventually use that power to fight him.’ Who on earth plots a revenge along those lines? But then a second later, the plot falls back in the supernatural drama category.  To top it all off there’s a whole lot of ‘woke humor’ which most of the time comes across as cringe worthy edginess we’re all happy we outgrew after HS.  But, even if you could somehow get pas the not-so-subtle jumps from complete absurdity to realism, there’s nothing else to hold on to. No character, no relationship, no plot line we’re offered is strong enough to pull us in.  In fact. one of the most annoying things about The Order is that basically no character has a personality. I am 8 episodes deep (and I don’t intend to finish it because that’s how boring it is) and I still don’t know anything substantial about anyone. And can we take a second to just look at Jake’s relationship with Alyssa? What even is that? Are they flirting are they not, does he really like her or is she a means to an end, is she into him or his dad, why are they kissing and why does it look so uncomfortable, did they just cast two people with the least chemistry on purpose or is bad writing/directing? So many questions. If we draw a parallel between Jack’s progress with her and him being on board with the wolves, it makes even less sense. He needs how many episodes to decide to try and kiss her, but when it comes to dedicating your whole life to fighting bad magic, you go from ‘no way, you’re all insane, you made me kill an innocent man’ to ‘I pledge my life to the cause’ within two seconds.   Speaking of things that make no sense, I have to mention Jack’s ‘friendship’ with Amir. Don’t get me wrong, I get that we meet people and think to ourselves how that could grow into a beautiful friendship, but acting as if someone you just met is really your friend, and that odd flashback to like one beer they shared, when Amir was found dead, is just... I don’t even know what to say.  The Order as an organization is equally puzzling. Who are they? Why are they? What’s the purpose, what’s the goal, the mission? I can’t settle for just a group of magic users who follow strict hierarchies but kinda all look out for themselves and don’t really like each other that much. And occasionally sacrifice goats. And change people’s memories.(And they can revive a golem and ask it who made it, but the fact that Jack, who found out about magic like yesterday, sabotaged their spell somehow goes right over their magical heads. ) But essentially it’s for the good of the whole wide world.????????????? And the masks are what makes me think an 8yo came up with the whole concept.  If you thought the werewolf knights are any less confusing, think again. They hear noises when ‘bad magic’ happens and solve it by killing anything that moves. Heroes. Also, how do they know what they are supposed to do if they refuse to read anything? I mean, that’s not how a secret society, since that’s more or less what they are, works. Someone has to tell you, show you, teach you. Sure, you have the wolves inside you, but if you don’t know they speak a certain language, it’s fairly certain you don’t know a whole lot. And why is there only four of you? How can four knights take down an organization as big as The Order? Especially since their preferred method is violent murder, something that is not very subtle and does not go unnoticed for long, which basically ensures the rage of the entire Order falling on their heads before they even begin their so called mission. Once again: ????????????????? And what even does ‘bad magic’ mean? The term is so vague and abstract that I have a hard time understanding how can you form an organization that fights something barely defined. All magic can potentially be bad magic. What are the guidelines here? Help me comprehend.  The show also has a very odd relationship towards death. One can sort of ‘forgive’ the wizards and the wolves for being chill about it, but if someone was targeting and butchering people on your campus, wouldn’t you be at least a bit worried? We don’t see any students panicking, we saw one police officer, there were no measures taken by the college, unless you count turning Amir’s death into a bike accident. And just when you start getting used to being casual about it, Jack has a whole meltdown over killing someone the first time he turned. And then also his professor. But even that meltdown is not very convincing, since most of what he does is just screaming ‘I KILLED AN INNOCENT MAN!!!’ into the void, without a much deeper attempt to deal with that. Which is why I don’t get why the show even made an issue out of it.  I also don’t get Jack’s grandpa. Like not even a little bit. Because if you think about it, it’s not * that * unimaginable that a little boy would come up with the idea of joining a secret society to avenge his mother’s death, but it is * very * odd to imagine an old ass grown up who not only thinks it’s a good idea to direct your whole young life towards revenge, but encourages it to a point of making a detailed plan on how to do that, and basically spends your entire childhood grooming you to become a little rage fueled bundle of psychological damage. All of this is only scratching the surface of the mess that is The fucking Order, because the show is a giant entangled coil of nonsense and I barely knew where to start. It’s fair to say that the biggest buzzkill is failure to pick a direction and stick with it. You don’t have to look that close to see some of the influences. The biggest one being, obviously, The Magicians, followed by some Teen Wolf, there’s even elements from Scream Queens, a bit of Buffy, a pinch of the Craft, etc. Almost like someone decided to look up successful shows in the supernatural/fantasy/horror genre and just smash them all up together in hopes of making something appealing to the largest audience possible. Personally, as a * very big * fan of before mentioned The Magicians, I get the feeling that Netflix wanted to make something that could rival it, but better. Because TM is, dare I say so, one of the best, if not the best, shows of the decade. I honestly have not seen anything like it, that has the same platform, in literally a decade. If you have, please let me know. 

Whit the BDE, edgy, but in a good way, humor, strong political views, strong female characters, fun twist and turns that actually do manage to mix absurd with normal life in a magical, no pun intended, way, sexuality representation, but not in a ‘we just want to please the gays so they give us the views’ way, great male characters we wish we saw more of, compelling character development and so on. Tho the most likable aspect of the series is probably the take on overdone story lines, where they twist the narrative just enough for it to become actually relatable. We all are tired of super special chosen ones who save the world because they are soo special and specially chosen by gods to save the world and all the dumb boring unspecial people with their pure hearts and strong characters. And also find true love.  You see attempts at this within The Order on every turn, except that it doesn’t work nearly as well for them, precisely because they went for that AND MORE. More wouldn’t even be a bad thing if it was’t so all over the place that it just comes off as ‘WE WANT EVERYONE TO LIKE THIS, GIVE US ALL THE VIEWS, ALL OF THEM.’ I am very much inclined to think this is what happened, considering other stuff Netflix has put out there. (Mostly referring to endlessly stupid shit like YOU, which only has the intention of being controversial and attention grabbing, for the views. Tho they do have some fun shit too, don’t get me wrong.) So I guess what I’m trying to say is,  the though of making something like TM, is not a bad one,  I’m all for it, but you actually have to put a shit ton more imagination into it if you want it to work out. But that’s just my opinion.   

[pir8chickk18]

Lost In Translation

Thank you @kittensartsbooks for tagging me.

So, what this is, is you take an excerpt from your wip and put it though google translate X amount of times until it’s complete nonsense and then you tag the same amount of people as number of languages that you put your wip through. I think I explained that correctly.  

So, here is the original, untranslated excerpt from my wip ‘Realm of the Demon Empress’: 

Amilia sat alone at the dinning table as servants busied around her preparing for the King and Prince’s arrival for their meal. She had a plate piled high with eggs, bacon, and toast in front of her as she looked over letters from all over the Kingdom and some of the adjacent Provinces about thieves and wild animal reports from people requesting her help.

As she shoved a piece of bacon in her mouth the doors to the dinning room where opened. She didn’t need to look up to see who had just arrived, she could tell by the three sets of high heels clacking against the marble floor exactly who was there.

“Mornin’.” She said through crumbs as she shuffled the handful of letters and grabbed a piece of toast.

“Good morning.” The three replied as they took their respective seats.

“You certainly are up early.” Christopher said to the girl with a smile, “Did you get hungry during the night?”

Amilia shook her head as she hurried to chew the food in her mouth before replying, “Been up since ‘fore dawn. Just got back from an early mornin’ trainin’.”

“One of these days you will need stop with those.” Avery told his sister gently as he motioned for wine to be brought to the table.

“An’ one a these days you outta stop drinkin’ wine this early.” His sister counted as she picked up her glass of milk and downed about half of it, licking her lips as she set the cup down.

“I suppose we both need to change, do we not?” Avery smiled.

Amilia shrugged as she shoveled her scrambled eggs into her mouth.

“So, Amilia.” Christopher said suddenly, “How is planning the tournament with your father and his advisers going?”

Amilia shrugged again, “S’alright. Some of ‘em are adamant that it only be open to men a higher standin’ to come an' compete, but I keep tellin’ ‘em it ain’t gonna count if everyone can’t fight. I wanna give everyone a fair chance, y’know? So, we’ll see what happens later today when they reach their decision.”

“Will you not be there for the meeting?” The blond asked the girl as she finished off her bacon.

Amilia remembering her manners, shook her head and swallowed before replying, “No. Gonna go to the South a the Kingdom, ‘parently there’s been kids goin’ missin’. Some people are thinkin’ it might be a bear or somethin’, others are thinkin’ slavers from Zelbem. I’mma go in a bit an’ see what I make a it. See what I can do at all, you guys don’t mind tellin’ father for me, right?”

Avery shook his head, “I shall let him know for you.”

Amilia smiled at her male counterpart, “Thanks Avery.”

Christopher frowned, “Princess Amilia, forgive me if I overstep a boundary here, but should you not be getting ready for the tournament and, subsequently, your marriage?”

The brunette shot the blond a feral grin, “Why’d I do somethin’ like that when my people need me? Were you actually considerin’ takin’ part in the tournament, Christopher? Seein’ if you finally got what it takes to win my hand?”

Christopher shifted in his seat slightly, but held the woman’s gaze, “I thought by now you might appreciate a true gentleman in your life, your majesty.”

Amilia’s grin widened, “You an’ you gentleman principles, you wouldn’t know what to do with me even if you could get me. I ain’t the girl who you can order onto her back neither. Why not try for an actual ‘lady’?”

Isabella’s face burned red being surrounded by such vulgar language. Amilia just smiled at herself seeing three red faces and downed the rest of her milk. She wiped her mouth with the back of her sleeve and stood from the table, gathering up all her letters and reports as she did.

“I’ll see you tonight, hopefully.” She said and left, hell bent on seeing what was going on with those children.

This is the translated piece. It went through Japanese, Latin, German, Romanian, and Thai before coming back to English. For some reason it turned Amilia’s pronouns into he/him/his, and changed her name to ‘Amir’ and variations of. 

Amilia is the king's captain, sitting in the office when he calls her from all sides to prepare for the meal. There was a bread and a toast, and there was a limit to the flesh, and I saw the towns in the suburbs receive the letters from the kingdom and all the wild animals he wanted to report. What pushed the edge of the bacon by pushing the door open into the dining room. She does not like what she should look for or who can say it. But there are three sentences on the marble floor and hit him with a high heel. "Toast with picking up the letter I grabbed the toast. "Good morning," they answered. Christopher said with a smile. "Of course when I'm hungry at night? Amir shook her head to repeat the mouth-watering plea that night. "If you practice" safe " "Recently, you have to stop walking yourself, man, and move Avery to the table," the sister said softly. "You stop here for the first time to drink wine," a number that took half a cup of milk, dropped in a cup while licking her lips. "Do we think this change should not be there?" Avery's decade. Amir is covered with eggs mixed on the shoulder shrug. "Yes, Amir," Christopher immediately said. "How do you think the tournament is about interrupting his father?" Amir fills up. But if someone leads the fight to tell him what is infinite. He is for everyone and gets a fair amount of money in a fair trial. In this way, when you get advice, it does not seem to happen afterwards. " "Is not it?" The blonde girl meeting asked him when the bacon turbulent ended. Amir remembered his manners before he responded, swallowing his head. I will go south of the kingdom, it depends on my parents, children. Some people think that it would suit the people of Zerubem, a servant of God who has something else. I let go, guess what I would do. I went to see what it was supposed to be and it was not. He told me about my father? ' Avery shook his head, "I know that." Amilia smiles: "Thanks to Avery, it was his. Christopher: "Please, I want you to show your kindness. But what do you do when you cross the same line if you are not prepared for your competition and marriage? " When the Hall of Grief and Wild Laughter were shot. "And if my people have to do something, you think in the Christopher match to join, you have to win the last time to win your hand, what do you want? Christopher of the Throne changed a little. But this woman shook hands in the eyes of the holder. "But now I think you confess your life, which is the king's favor. Amir added, smiling: "You and your people, principle and that they can me, because I do not know what you are doing, then come back to her, so the girl can not be why you do not ask:" Woman "? Isabella's face has a faint reddish hue. To laugh at him as well as the milk flowing to Amirim, he looks around the red body, about three ways. He stood with his mouth and headed to the table, wiping us with the arms of the second report from each letter. "Last night I see you," he said.

I am so sorry for the eye bleeding, but it is kinda funny. I don’t know what went on with the dialogue either, so sorry about that. And the long post.

But now I would like to tag @maxseidel @damnwrites @vellichorwrites @cogwrites @dogwrites and anyone else who would like to do this. It’s actually really fun.

[theaxtorres]

In the Nature of Resistance

Under the covers of scheming politics, the notions of the privileged battling over the underdogs manifests itself through a correspondence between various personas of the youth.

May 14, 1994

To: Amir Rodriguez

Dear Amir,

How have you been? I was going through all the clutter in my room today and found an old stash of childhood photos. There’s one of us sharing a bowl of ice cream while our moms are chatting away in the background. It’s reminded me of the innocent fun we used to have when our parents left us to our pleasure and have the maids to clean up after us.

I believe it’s been four years now since you moved away to the province and my parents still silence me every time I mention wanting to see you again. To this day, I still wonder what happened between our parents that forced you to leave the city. Do you know why? Whenever I ask, Dad merely tells me that your parents didn’t do their job well and chose self-indulgence over the greater good. I have no idea what he means. It gets me absolutely riled up the way he talks to me like I’m one of his colleagues, with words falling out of his mouth like a corporate letter and actions so dry, it’s like he’s living off a script.

Recently, Mom and Dad have been too caught up in meetings with the big bosses of the government to even bother about me. They’re also in and out of courtrooms, only coming home early to hold a party every time one of their cases gets dismissed with the defendant found not guilty. You know I’ve met the President because of these parties? He was rushing away from a reporter drilling him for his opinion on those rallies those random people do on the streets, when Mom and Dad invited him to join us in our ride to the party. He’s very loud though, too assertive to make friends with.

Anyway, I’ve been trying to read more books to forget about all these mom and dad issues. It really is working so far. I’m on my fourth novel this month. Have you read State of War by Ninotchka Rosca? I highly recommend it.

I’d love to hear about your life, your family. Are Tita and Tito doing well? How about your Ate Lisa? Did she get accepted in the school paper? Or has she graduated already? I wouldn’t know. I really wish you replied to all my previous letters to you.

Hoping to finally get word from you soon, Mir.

Sincerely,

Adrian Ocampo

   May 18, 1994

To: Lisa Rodriguez 

Dear Ate Lisa,

Mom and Dad are doing as well as they can. However, Dad really needs to learn how to control his temper every time he reads the newspaper. Those Ocampos have become the right hand of the President, and it’s stirring Dad back to his, in the words of the ever-articulate Lois Ocampo, ‘aktibistang kanser sa lipunan’ days. With all the impossibly speedy court trials where all the President’s best friends are deemed innocent, even Mom has started slipping some awry spiels against this government’s subtle despotism during her barangay meetings. 

Are there any updates on our exposé, Ate? I heard Richard gathered enough accounts from the victims of the Sta. Clara narcotics bust. I think that high of a number of deaths of innocent people is enough to start a conversation. Tyranny’s on the way and I’m sick of having to wait and wait for more evidence, statistics, and public statements. Are the masses really as ignorant as you say they are? Would they really ignore the truth even if it’s lying bloodied on the ground in front of them? 

Speaking of ignorance, Adrian sent me a letter again. Poor soul is still horribly blinded by his privilege to see that the country’s justice system is crumbling to the ground because of their happy circle of friends and family. Apparently, he’s met the President. He probably even has the opportunity to poison that man, but he’s too busy complaining about how his parents don’t give him enough attention. He says he’s been reading more books now. I hope that finally teaches him to put two and two together and realize it was his father who filed that senseless treason allegation against Mom and Dad that got us into this mess of a life, of a country. 

Write back quickly, Ate. Give me assignments, people to interview, anything I can do to help speed up the process. If Mom and Dad are too worn down in this fight for justice, the least we can do is to continue it.

Be careful always.

Love,

Amir

  May 24, 1994

To: Amir Rodriguez

 Amir,

I’ve been meaning to hear from you since my last letter, but I just can’t help but let you know what’s been going on. Home doesn’t feel like home anymore. I barely even get to talk to my parents, especially Dad. He spends more time with those bland looking men in his study everyday, and he barely gets out. I could hear weird sounds and chants about exposés and rebellions up in where you are right now.

As I was reading, I heard them mention your sister’s name. I’m having a gutting feeling about this. Even though the voices I heard were faint, I don’t have a good feeling about this, Amir. I know you’re ignoring me right now because of who I am and where I am right now, but I want you to know that I still see you as a friend.

Be careful, brother.

Adrian

 May 26, 1984

To: Adrian Ocampo

Adrian,

I hope this letter reaches to you in time. 

I’m Lisa, Amir’s older sister. I used to scold you two for making too much noise when you were children playing. Before we left, I remember you always asking me how my application to the school paper was going. It always put a smile on my face how much you cared, even if it was just to annoy me at that time.

Right now, I need you to care about my school paper again. I need you to care about Amir and all the other innocent families and lives that were thrown into a hell of a life because of the people you’re surrounded by. Dear Adrian, open your eyes, I beg you. Look around the confines of your big palace and see the struggle of the poor. Read the news with a brave heart. There’s truth in the bloodshed.

You are our closest hope to understanding their schemes. By writing you this letter, I put myself and my family at risk. You could easily expose us to your Dad and have us killed by morning, or you could finally make it up to us, to the country for what your family has done.

On May 28, your parents will be meeting with the President, the Presidential Spokesperson, and the Secretary of National Defense, and a few more unidentified individuals to most probably talk about a new scheme. The news have been showing their ugly side too much. They’re going to do something about it.

Listen to them, Adrian. Give us caution. Send us a letter about what you hear, and dear God, I hope to hell you do the right thing.

Thank you.

Lisa Rodriguez

 June 12, 1994

To: Lisa Rodriguez

 Ate Lisa,

They’re planning to shut down all media organizations. They have fake documents and forged papers at their disposal. They’re going to silence anyone who gets in their way with only two things; with a shutdown or with a gun. It doesn’t matter to them as long as the lies go on. I’ve read enough books to know this is Martial Law. This is tyranny and a call for justice.

I assure you, you can trust me. I know you’re in the good fight. Keep going at it. It doesn’t make sense here anymore.

Please, save yourselves and hide. I think they’re on to you and your family. Write back.

I’ll write to you everything I know. I’m on your side, believe me. 

Sincerely,

Adrian

 June 16, 1994

To: Amir Rodriguez

Ate Lisa’s safe. She’s back in school now.

Take care. I heard there was a number of collateral damage in the attack. They’re unstoppable.

Regards,

Richard

 The Metro Standard

Friday, July 1, 1994

Ocampo son mistakenly shot by presidential aide

By: Karl Trinidad

MANILA, PHILIPPINES - Adrian Ocampo, son of senator Lois Ocampo and presidential right hand Bong Ocampo, was shot dead by a presidential aide early this morning, July 1. According to news reports, the Ocampo boy was suspiciously walking around the Malacañang Palace in the early hours of the morning, which alerted the aide as a possible spy from activists or militant groups which could harm President Ernesto Barrameda.

The aide who shot the boy indicated he alerted the boy and asked who he was, but the boy ran away towards the halls. 

“It was my second nature to [pull] the trigger. I didn’t know who [the boy] was. I thought I was just doing my job,” the suspect said.

Witnesses reported the boy came from a morning run to the post office to send some letters and postcards and bought coffee afterwards from a local shop. Although his intentions in the Palace are still unknown, administrators are currently looking for more sufficient evidence about the matter. 

Bong and Lois Ocampo, who had recently signed an agreement with President Barrameda concerning new retributions of the media’s alleged propagandist attacks towards the government, have rescheduled a number of court hearings in order to organize their son’s funeral.

The Metro Standard tried to reach out to the Ocampo family for a statement, but the request is still unanswered.

This article was originally published in The Benildean Issue 14 and on The Benildean website.

[survivor-uluru]

IMMUNITY 1 RESULTS

Welcome and thank you for your patience! Before we get into the scoring, let’s meet our four lovely judges who took the time to review and grade your videos for you!

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Hi I’m jones I’m your 3 time flop and I got the IQ of a bUrnt chicken nugget!!

Hey I’m Caeleb! I’ve played one singular org before so my qualifications as a judge are boundless

Hi my name is Jess and I have trash opinions. I'm sorry in advanced..

Hi! I'm Ali, I'm a British mess who won a tumblr survivor season tonight which is madness?!? I can't wait to watch your videos, anything will be better than my horrendous contribution to our Tik Tok video that nobody needs to see! Good luck this season too, if I can do it, anyone can askdjflaf

Here were the videos that you gave the judges to watch:

Adnoartina (Moral)

Kalaya (Maverick)

Marindi (Merciless)

Let’s take a look at the scores!

Adnoartina:

Jones:

ORIGINALITY: 9 ENTERTAINMENT: 10 EDITING: 9 OVERALL EFFORT: 9

YEEEEES I CRIEEDDDD MADELEINE COREY GLORIA CHRISSA UGH IT GAVE ME FUCKIG LFIE WOWOWOW I especially loved the doodle of the one guy just flying around screen,, king

Caeleb:

Originality: 7 Entertainment: 9 Editing: 10 Overall effort: 9

Honestly stunning. Humorous as hell. Editing was a gem. Each persons scene well executed

Jess:

Originality: Was it super original, no? Did I appreciate it.. yes! 7 Entertainment: Two people stole the show here and that’s Corey and Gloria. Holy shit. New bucket list item: Go to a club with Gloria and Corey. 9 Editing: 7 Overall Effort: I appreciate that there were more than 3 members of your tribe in this music video!  8.5

Ali:

Originality: 7 Entertainment: 8 Editing: 7 Overall Effort: 8

Okay... this one was so fun! Corey fully SNAPPED, the dancing was ICONIC, and Glo did that, the song choice was very like... classic lip syncy but you lot did that, this was a wild ride. I think this one felt the most like a whole tribe effort, which is something I think is super commendable?

Kalaya:

Jones:

ORIGINALITY: 9 ENTERTAINMENT: 10 EDITING: 9 OVERALL EFFORT: 9

UHHDHDHDJFJJFJF HANNAH MONTANA KILL ME  the Orlando bloom bit,,,, there were only bits where some lip syncing was off but LITERALLY so fucking good??? Sammy always killing it on editing

Caeleb:

Originality: 8 Entertainment: 8 Editing: 10 Overall effort: 8

Some SUPER FUN QUIRKS like the color thing omg. Y’all look like you were just having so much fun I wanted to join and party party

Jess:

Originality:  because COSTUME CHANGES. YASS! 7.5 Entertainment: 8I was entertained, duh. 8 Editing:  Loved everything about the editing in this video tbh. 8 Overall Effort: oh my. This was a classic imo.  8

Ali:

Originality: 7 Entertainment: 8 Editing: 10 Overall Effort: 10

Okay this one was SO cute. Big props to the editing, like... it wasn't just flipping back and forth but you had the colours and Orlando Bloom which was really fun I loved it a lot. I also thought it was smart to do best of both worlds thematically for the nature of your tribe, I just thought this was so CLEVER. Drew/Monty/Sammy fully snapped and I'm 100% here for it. Only thing I put low was originality because  I feel its a relatively predictable song choice idk akjsldf?

Marindi:

Jones:

ORIGINALITY: 7 ENTERTAINMENT: 8 EDITING: 8 OVERALL EFFORT: 6

Y’all get a six for effort Bc I’m just sad there’s only 3/7 of you in the video : ( but the 3 that we’re in it ??? Fucking brought it. I see you sugar glider. please feed your trash bag model tho

Caeleb:

Originality: 6 Entertainment: 8 Editing: 7 Overall effort: 6

It was FUN and it POPPED but there was only 3 :( It just didnt truly stand out compared to the others

Jess:

Originality: I mean.. the person in the basement was.. original unless this was a Pornhub Org. 6.5 Entertainment: I kind of really dug this? Amir was serving me salt-bae realness, that one guy in the pink was crushing the lip sync… and well…need I say more about the person in the onesie? (Also you scared me shitless the whole time). 8.5 Editing: Honestly, the editing was fine? Wasn’t stellar but also wasn’t horrible. It’s a pass. 7 Overall Effort: If I was rating this video solely based on the person in the leather it’d be a 10. Honestly this is a solid 6ish for me! Gotta give me more people! 6.5

Ali:

Originality: 9 Entertainment: 10 Editing: 7 Overall Effort: 6

okay so this one... started so confusingly... with the bin bag mannequin? askjdfalf, but the onesie dancing with it going on was AJSDLKSAF, Lukas this was iconic. Dylan R did some AMAZING lip syncing, as did Eddie. I think you were let down by that it was just you three in the video? Like you REALLY snapped and did amazing as the three of you, but it would've been great to see more of the tribe? like I score you lot highest on creativity/entertainment, and then less on editing/effort because you had a fair bit less to work with

HERE ARE THE FINAL SCORES!

In first place with 137.5 points is...

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Kalaya! Congratulations, you are safe from the first tribal council of the season.

It comes down to Adnoartina and Marindi. One of you scored 133.5 while the other score 116.5. With a score of 133.5, congratulations...

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Adnoartina!

That means that Marindi, you will be headed to the first tribal council of the season. Tribal Council will be held at 10 PM EST tomorrow. Google Hangouts may or may not be dead but if it’s not, tribal will be hosted there. If it is... we’ll improvise. If you cannot be at the potentially(?) live tribal tomorrow, please make sure to send your votes to your host chats!

ALSO: Please make sure to send in your judgement points to your host chats by the end of the round, or you WILL receive a penalty.

Good luck to the merciless tribe. Everyone else, congratulations again on a hard fought battle.

[rivierafireflypodcast]

Firefly with KidooLand Robert Bar Sur Loup

BAR SUR LOUP

5minutes of Fun Firefly Facts to discovering the French Riviera with guests.

Get our French Economy boosted #staylocal #buylocal #supportlocal

Welcome to the latest series on the Riviera Firefly podcast sponsored by KidooLand your childcare solution for safe summer fun, Playgroup Kindergarten and Forest school .

The Firefly is joining up with the locals to share some of the best of the Riviera …  so that our friends and tourists can enjoy all that the French riviera has to offer but also for those that already live here .. Staycations will be on the menu this summer so let’s spread the word ..  help people find the best info to stay local , buy local and support local.

Today we drop into Bar Sur Loup

  So please enjoy these bite size five minutes of fun facts and let’s boost our local communities .. a review , like or share will go a long way to spreading the word.

  LINKS MENTIONED

Maison  Thibeaut  https://www.thibeaut.fr/

Amiral de Grasse

Hike : Chemin du Paradis to Gourdon

Restaurants: Donjon , Hotel des Jasmines, l'Ecole des Filles

SEL https://www.seldubarsurloup.fr

CONTACT OUR GUEST

Thanks to Robert Levitt from Via Nissa for his time. https://www.vianissa.com

Full Interview with Robert

http://www.rivierafirefly.com/49-discovering-nice-italy-and-the-south-of-france/

SPONSORED BY KIDOOLAND.

This episode was brought to you by KidooLand The Little English School on the French Riviera. Running classes and holiday camps for children age 0-16 years and workshops for grown ups too including Yoga, Pilates and conversation!

In 2018 we expanded and  opened The Loft a great addition to the annexe and in 2019 opened KidooVillage. 2020 saw the launch of the Academy as part of KidooLand online.

Find us : Vallauris, Villeneuve Loubet Village and pop ups in Valbonne with www.kidooland.com 

Online classes and courses www.kidooland.online

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Finding your way is a podcast for those going through some of life's transitions and challenges as one reaches mid life ..

Check out this Riviera Firefly episode!

[bytrinaarmstrong-blog]

Secure the Bag: Part.1

I am so excited to finally share Secure the Bag: Part 1 with you guys.

Here is a lil’ taste. I hope you enjoy. 😊

Chapter 1

“After tonight, my world will change forever!” My sister shouts from the sunroof of the stretch Hummer limo. She had get this bright ass barbie pink color as if a stretch Hummer isn’t big and obnoxious enough.

She's a little intoxicated, maybe a lot, and she feels the need to announce to the entire Vegas strip that this is her last night of singledom.

I'm happy for her. Although, I think she's rushing, at least the man she's marrying has a secure career.

In my opinion, she is too young. She's only twenty-five; her brain just stopped developing like three months ago. She's still learning and developing who she is as a person. But hey, what do I know? I'm not marrying some young, rich, tall basketball star.

I can’t even be mad at her decision to secure the bag. I just fear that she'll lose herself inside of her new husband and their marriage.

As far as I know, she wants to be a lawyer. Or at least she wanted to. Now, she's giving it all up to be one of those wives at the games. Not saying it won’t be fun. I'm sure it's plenty of fun to cheer from the sidelines, but how fulfilling can it be?

I can’t sit in the background and watch my husband live his dreams. Watching him do what he loves would push me even harder. But for my sister, I'm sure being a kept woman is her dream. I'm just glad that her dreams came true.

“Turn that shit up! That is my motherfuckin’ song!” My sister, Riley, shouts from the sunroof. The Pepto limo is thumping the hottest new song, "Jiggle Lil’ Booty" by Lil’ Trappah. I can’t lie, the beat is perfect to twerk too. I can hardly contain myself. I just wish I knew what this Lil’ Trappah person was saying. Only the words from the chorus are clear, and even those are questionable.

“Lil’ booties need love too! I’m talking ‘bout them butt cheeks not the baby shoes!” Everyone in the limo shouts clear as day.

These girls must have supersonic hearing or a lyric translator app. For the life of me, I don’t get how they understand these mushmouth ass lyrics. I guess it doesn't help that I'm a bit older than everyone in the limo.

I'm thirty years old, I'm in Vegas for the first time, and I'm going to make the best of it. I pinch the edge of my white bodycon dress, pulling it down the dress-hiking thighs my mama blessed with me with. I raise my hands through the sunroof, stand on the seat and look around in awe of the strip. There are lights everywhere: flashing, flickering, and glowing.

I know this night belongs to my sister, but she got hers. It's time to get mine, my money that is. I'm going to leave Vegas at least a thousand dollars richer. I don’t need the man to get the bag. I can't wait forever for these fools, and I don’t plan on it. I rather have my own shit anyway.

“Remi! You’re hogging the sunroof!” Riley pushes me to the side.

“Move! We both can’t be up here.” I groan as she continues to squeeze her big busted self through the sunroof.

“There’s enough space!” She lightly pushes me as a smile creeps onto my face.

“Did you have fun last night?”

“Last night was lit! Thank you for planning my bridal shower. I know this has been pretty stressful. I didn’t know weddings were so much work.”

“Girl, you’ve never watched a wedding show?”

“No. I don’t watch those boring things like someone I know.”

“I watch it for aesthetic purposes. I like to see the decorations and the color schemes they pick.” “It’s okay, sis. I know you take mental notes.”

“For what?”

“Your future wedding.”

“Please!" I suck my teeth.

"That’s the furthest thing from my mind right now. My mind is on my money and money is on my mind.” Riley waves her hand.

“Whatever you say.”

“Do you know where we’re going tonight?”

“Nia wants to surprise me.”

“Nia is going to surprise you with an oily stripper at the door.”

“She better not.” I raise my glass. “Well, here’s to another lit night.”

“May all our dreams come true.” Our champagne flutes clink in unison before we empty them. We sink back into the limo with the rest of the girls, anticipating the fun to come.

∞∞∞

The limo pulls up in front of one of the hottest clubs in Vegas. The music is right and full of bass. Even the people in line are dancing. I would dance too if I were standing in a line wrapped around the strip. Just the thought of standing in that line with heels irritates me.

The limo driver opens the door and holds out his hand to assist us out of the stretch Pink Panther mobile.

“Hope you ladies have a blast tonight.” The smooth-voiced limo driver smiles. He tips his hat, revealing the ponytailed locs underneath.

“Thank you!” We all say in unison.

“What’s your name again?” I ask.

He removes his driving gloves to shake my hand. “Amir Good.”

He has long, thick fingers with short, clean nails. His full beard fades at his sideburns connecting to a natural hairline that could pass for a shape up. He looks into my eyes as if he is familiar with them.

“Thank you for getting us here safely, Mr. Good.”

“No, problem—” “Remi, Remi Jones.” I reach for my purse to give him a tip.

He politely pushes my hand away. “Have a great evening, Ms. Jones.”

“Remi, come on!” Nia yells back toward the limo. Nia reserved our tables in advance, allowing us to skip the line altogether. It’s crazy how so many people can give a look of disdain all at once.

“I’ve been standing here for over an hour!” One woman shouts at security. She looks upset, and I know her feet feel even worse in those stilettos.

“I don’t make the rules, ma’am. Please wait in line as the club is almost at full capacity. Next time you should reserve your table like these lovely ladies.” The tall bouncer smiles as he let us in. “Have a good evening, ladies.”

Between the limo driver and the bouncer, I don’t know if going inside is the right choice. It seems like all the fine men are outside the club.

“Remi trying to get chose!” Whitney yells loud enough for the bouncer to hear.

“See, I was going to buy you a drink, but you play too much.”

“I’m just playing!” Whitney hooks her arm into mine, and we all find our way to our table.

More pink, yay! The love affair my sister has with this color is sickening. At least the shade of pink Nia chose is cute; soft powder pink balloons with rose gold accents.

“I love it!” Riley screams. She is going into pink overload. She grabs the bottle of Rose´ out of the ice bucket and puts it in the smoky club air.

“Here is to the rest of my life! May it be on and poppin’!” Riley pops the cork to the champagne, making it glide across the ceiling. We all jump from the loud pop of the cork but not far enough to not grab a champagne flute from the table. Riley fills our glasses, and we make another toast to a fun night. We waste no time downing our drinks and heading toward the dance floor.

“Hold up! All the sexy ladies in the house get on the dance floor right now! All di bad gals dem!” The DJ sounds off the reggae horns.

Before I know it, my body is moving to the beat. My hips roll like waves on the ocean water. I arch my back and rest my hands on my knees. I look back at it, only to see a smiling man towering behind me. His smile lights up the dark dance floor.

He leans into my ear. “Mind if I join you?”

“Looks like you already have.” I wind my hips as he stands behind me, watching and breathing down my neck. “Are you going to dance or just stand there?”

He strokes his goatee. “I think I’ll just watch.”

“Then why ask me to dance?”

“So, I wouldn’t seem like a creep while I stare.”

“That’s not weird. Nope, not all.”

“Let me buy you a drink.”

“Dance with me first.” There's no point in letting my song go to waste. I pull in Mr. Tall and Handsome, making him trail behind me. I rock my hips from side to side with the beat, leaving him no choice but to follow my rhythm.

“What’s your name?”

“Remi.”

“Like the rapper?”

“Like the rapper, like the hair, like the drink. I can keep going.”

“I like that. Come on, let’s go back to my table.” He takes my hand and leads me through the crowd on the dance floor. While holding his hand, my eyes land on the pinky ring that dons his finger. A cluster of diamonds sparkle under the flashing lights that make our brown skin look blue. My eyes almost pop out of my head as they travel from his large hand to the Presidential Rolex on his wrist.

This man has to be at least six foot seven, and his pockets seem to be just as long. Jackpot!

There is nothing like a fine man with commas in his bank account. Money can’t buy love, but as my mother always tells me, romance without finance is a nuisance. Mr. Baller takes us to his table which is already full of bottles.

“What would you like to drink?”

“I want to try some of that Ace of Spades.”

He nods his head and pours the champagne into a flute. “Great choice,” he says as our glasses clink. "What’s your name?”

“I’m surprised you don’t already know who I am.”

“Should I know?”

“It depends on what you’re into, I guess.”

“So, are you going to tell me or are you going to keep playing this guessing game? I mean, I can be like Nev from Catfish and do an image search.”

He puts his fist over his mouth and lets out a loud chuckle. “You got jokes; I like that.” He sips some champagne before setting his glass on the table. “I’m Trey Drayton.”

“Are you a basketball player?”

“I play for Utah.”

I turn my nose. “Utah? Ugh!”

“I know. As you can see, I’m trying to make the best of it.”

“You come to Vegas often?”

“I’m here for my boy's wedding this weekend.”

“He’s marrying my sister.”

“Wow, it’s a small world. I’ve known Khai since our AAU days. Your sister is in good hands.”

“I’m glad you think so.”

Trey's eyes scan over my dress. “I also think you’re beautiful.”

I blush as I flip my locs over my shoulder. “Thank you.”

“So, what are you doing later tonight?”

“I’ll be with the bridal party since the wedding is tomorrow.”

“You should chill with me. Let me get to know you outside of the club; somewhere quiet.”

“Somewhere private?”

“What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas, right?” I knock back the rest of my champagne. It's been a year since I had any physical contact. Just the thought of it has my blood rushing, or maybe it's that third glass of champagne. Either way, my body is ready. Trey places his hand on my thigh, lightly brushing his lips past my ear. I damn near melt from the slightest touch. I can feel him inhaling my perfume, creating heat between my thighs. What are you doing, Remi?

I don’t know what I'm doing or why I'm so comfortable with Trey being so close. Trey's lips are soft, and so are his gigantic hands. I pull away and look into his slanted eyes; filled with the type of lust that fans my fire.

“I don’t even know you.”

“So, get to know me. I’m a basketball player. I’m from D.C., and I love beautiful, brown women like yourself.”

“I’m from Maryland.”

“See! We have that DMV connection.” He flashes his bright smile.

“You seem a bit comfortable,” I say while looking at his hand on my thigh.

"That’s how you make me feel. Are you comfortable?”

“Yes, thanks for asking.”

“So, do you want to go back to my suite?”

“It’s just that easy for you?”

“You can’t answer a question with a question, love.”

“As much as I would like to, I don’t think I’m about that life.”

“Take my number.” He pulls out his phone just before reciting his number out loud. “Call me.”

I hit the call button, connecting us in an instant. “It’s R-e-m-i.”

“Okay, Remi with an I. I’ll see you tomorrow at the wedd—” A waterfall of ice and liquor pours down Trey’s face. I look up to see a young, tall woman with anger painted all over her face.

“You’ll see her where? I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear what you were saying. Now, what did you say, Trey?!” Her voice elevates to a pitch my brain can’t compute.

“Baby, I can explain!”

“Baby?” She has to be at least six foot five, two hundred pounds of defined muscle. She's almost a foot taller than me, and she has a wingspan made for dunking.

“Yes, baby! Is there a problem, bitch?” She spews as her eyes pop out of her head.

“Bitch?”

“You seemed confused. Let me knock some sense into that empty brain of yours.”

“This is a major misunderstanding.” I stand up from my seat, adjust my dress, and hope and pray she takes her misplaced anger out on her man.

“The only misunderstanding is you throwing your pussy at my man. You’re just the type. Groupie ass bitch! Fucking thots stay plotting,” she yells loud enough to cause a scene.

The last thing I need is my sister flying across the room on the night of her bachelorette party.

“Trey?” I call. He shrugs his shoulders. I look back at her, hoping to calm her down, some way, somehow. “I honestly didn’t know he had a girlfriend.”

Girlfriend? I’m his wife; Dawn Drayton!” She waves her left hand, showing off her ring. I feel a bit dizzy from the drinks, and the air from her hands creates a light breeze on my face.

My eyes cut to Trey in disbelief. “You ain’t shit.” I tip the ice bucket on the table into his lap before dashing off as fast as possible. Hoping to find Riley and the rest of the bridal party, I run back to the dance floor.

“I am not done with you!” Dawn is right behind me. I'm not trying to fight in a Las Vegas nightclub with what looks like to be Wilt Chamberlain’s daughter. I pull out my phone and call the limo driver while heading toward the entrance.

"Touchdown Limos, Amir speaking."

“Come back to the club, please. Emergency pick-up.”

“On my way.” I end the call and pick up the pace toward the door. I already know that I have no dog in this fight. I'm not a punk, but homegirl’s reach is long enough to punch me through the crowd. Plus, my white dress is too cute to stain with blood.

The closer I get to the door, the closer she seems to get to me. Trey’s mute ass isn’t too far behind. A part of me wants to turn around and throw my shoe at his forehead, but I know that will only get the Mrs. more upset.

“Remi, wait!” I hear Trey shout. Trifling Trey is trying to get me killed. Thankfully, my phone vibrates, notifying me that my limo is out front. The bouncer at the door notices me speed walking and gives me a look of concern.

“Is everything okay, sweetheart?”

“Can you hold those Amazonian people behind me while I get in the car?”

“No problem.” The security guard tilts his head, relaying a message through his walkie-talkie. I rush out the exit to see the driver standing with the door open. I damn near dive into the back seat.

I look out the window to see security blocking Dawn and Trey from the exit. There are camera lights flashing and bystanders recording everything with their cell phones. The last thing I need is to be on the gossip blogs for being chased out of the club.

“It’s just you?” The driver asks.

I look back to see Dawn’s fist connect with Trey’s jaw. Ouch! “Yes, please go.” I have to get away from all of the camera flashes. Even though the windows are tinted, I duck down in my seat as far as I can. The limo pulls off with no destination in sight.

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