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heavenlyvision · 9 months

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Mattress

Word count: 2.1k

Pairing: Raiden x afab!Reader

A/N: I don't have any excuses, I am apparently feral tonight and decided to write a short fic for Raiden that is basically all smut. I feel bad that he tied in the poll but lost to the wheel :(( Have this as a peace offering <33

Summary: Raiden's bed is more comfortable than your own, which means you are always in it, much to his dismay.

Warnings: 18+ only, smut, pwp, p in v sex, no pronouns used, praise, Gentle!Raiden, eye contact, no use of y/n

The mattress of Raiden’s bed is significantly more comfortable than your own, something you tell him frequently. Something he tells you is not true every time you bring it up but continues to remain true to you. Whether it’s because it’s actually more comfortable or if it’s because it’s Raiden’s bed, you aren’t sure but it’s comfy here. Safe.

“Go back to your own bed,” he complains from beside you.

You pretend to think hard, humming, “Hmm no, I am comfy here.”

He’s exasperated with you; he just wants to read alone in bed and you are hijacking his peace and quiet. You think right about now he is regretting letting you live with him but you needed a roomie and he is one of your oldest friends, so he caved and let you stay with him.

“I can’t do anything alone anymore,” he sighs.

You huff out at him, “You can to! I am just having a little nap.”

“Do it in your own room,” he complains.

Whinging at him, you protest, “But my mattress is lumpy and weird, plus I don’t like sleeping alone.”

“Do what you want, you are going to anyway,” he acquiesces, this conversation going nowhere.

You smile smugly, proud of yourself, he always caves with you and now you get to nap comfortably in his bed beside him. You weren’t lying, your bed is genuinely lumpy and weird and you prefer sleeping next to him, your sleep is better when you know he’s beside you.

“You always give in,” you prod at his side, gloating.

“Do not push it,” he warns but you still poke at his side, “I thought you wanted to nap?” He asks, slapping your hand away.

You ignore him and sit up, continuing to tease and poke at him. He’s generally difficult to get a reaction out of, too ‘mature’ to stoop to your level but every now and again you push his buttons just right and he’ll retaliate. It’s always fun to watch.

Apparently, today he’s extra touchy and he shoots up, grabbing you and pushing you back on the mattress. He holds you down under him, your wrists being pushed into the mattress.

“You are meant to be napping,” he scowls at you, his face close to your own.

His proximity makes you nervous, this does not bode well for your crush on him. You’re stunned as you look up at him, not expecting him to hold you down like this and certainly not expecting him to do it so effortlessly.

“What is wrong? You normally have so much to say,” his brows are still furrowed at you.

You try to struggle against his hold, attempting to free yourself. Your attempts are entirely unsuccessful, your movements not even affecting his hold on you even a little bit. Which makes you frown at him, the annoyed expression on your face and unsuccessful escape has Raiden’s features lighting up. Seemingly pleased at your realisation of your defeat.

You ask him, “Can you get off me now?”

“Hmm no, I am comfy here,” he smiles smugly at you, repeating your words from before.

Your frown deepens at him but he seems to have done a one-eighty, overly pleased with himself while you are now annoyed with him.

As you gaze at him you can’t help but drift over all of his features, the smugness in his eyes, the definition of his nose, the softness of his lips. You quickly flick your eyes back up to his, hoping he didn’t notice your wandering gaze. But he did, he always notices everything you do, you can’t make an out of the usual decision or move, he notices and he always checks if you’re okay.

When it comes to your feelings you can’t tell if he’s ignoring them or dim but with the knowing look in his eyes now, he seems to have finally caught onto your desire for him at the very least. His head ducks down closer to yours, his lips lightly grazing your own, the slight touch makes you dizzy. You’ve liked him for so long and now he’s so close to you, his skin touching yours.

His lips move against yours as he checks with you, “Can I kiss you?”

“Yes, please?”

Your confirmation has him pressing his lips to yours properly, it’s so soft and so caring and so him. He has you melting for him just from a tender kiss and you really wish you could touch him but he’s still holding you down. His lips are gentle and searching, learning how you like to be kissed. One of his hands leaves your wrist to grasp the side of your face, his lips the smallest bit more forceful as he holds your face.

The increase in his urgency has a light gasp pulling from you and he takes the opportunity to slide his tongue into your mouth. Your free hand reaches up and holds on the side of his face, pulling him down to you more, wanting more from him. Craving all of him, and he provides, his kiss becomes fervent and full and it has you lightheaded. Small whines are slipping from you at the way he kisses you, he’s kissing you like you’re delicate, trying so hard to be gentle but being overwhelmed by his and your own need.

When he pulls back you’re breathless, you’ve never been kissed so attentively, so fully. The desire you feel for him is unmatched and you’ve been so carefully pulled apart by his lips alone. His thumb strokes high on your cheekbone, his eyes captivated by you, they keep flicking back to your lips. Waiting for you to catch your breath so he can kiss you again.

You’re still restrained, hand struggling under his hold to remind him he’s still got you pinned, he releases you at your movements and both your arms reach up, grabbing behind his neck and pulling him down to you completely. His lips crash against yours, eager to kiss you again, his tongue immediately in your mouth again. Exploring you carefully, attentive to how you react to him.

One of his hands slides down your body and holds onto your thigh, pulling it up and hooking it onto his hip. You use the position to your advantage and pull his hips to yours, your core pressed against his crotch. The shock of your movement has a surprised sound exiting Raiden, he moves his lips off yours and rests his forehead against you.

“We can stop,” he tells you, giving you an out. Not wanting to push you into something you don’t want.

You pull him close to you and grind against the bulge in his pants, “I don’t want to.”

The motion has him closing his eyes, having to control himself momentarily, “Then, undress.”

His words bleed with need and desire, you can tell his control waned thin for a second, his tone has an underlying commanding manner to it. It has you throbbing for him. He lets you push him back so you can undress, you slip out of your pants before tugging your shirt off.

“These too,” he comments, lifting the waistband of your panties before letting them snap back against you. The shock of it making you jump.

He had pulled his own shirt and pants off while you did, both equally undressed, “You first,” you retort.

Your apprehension makes him smile at you, he tugs his underwear off first, completely bare in front of you. His cock fully erect for you, the sight of it has your insides twisting, he’s large and thick and, “I don’t know if you’ll fit,” you observe.

“I am not that big,” he dismisses.

You look at him incredulously, “Humble to a fault.”

He shakes his head at you but taps your leg, reminding you to take off your own underwear, which you do, nervously. Chucking them to the floor when they’re off, Raiden shuffles closer to you again, between your legs.

“If you are worried, I will be gentle.” He assures you.

You look at him coquettishly, “You don’t have to be.”

His eyes shut, gathering himself, “I am going to be gentle.” He replies, it’s not a question.

“Okay,” you answer.

He slides the head of his cock through your folds, gathering all of your slick on him. Getting his dick wet to make the stretch easier on you, his movements have you twitching against him. His eyes are alight with satisfaction, enjoying your bodies reaction to him and his minimal touch. He notches himself against your pussy hole before gingerly pushing forwards, the stretch a lot for you.

He notices your struggle to take him, and he rubs his thumb over your clit, the pleasurable stimulation has you relaxing against him. Enough so he can push the head of his cock into you, the feeling has you both sighing.

“You are tight,” he groans, struggling slightly with the grip you have on him.

You argue back, “You’re just big.”

He chuckles a bit but pushes into you more, his cock is a lot to take but he eventually has you stuffed full of him. Your cunt taking him to the hilt, you’re so wet for him that you’re practically drooling on his dick.

Once he’s fully inside you, he leans down, pressing all of himself against you. Skin to skin. The contact has your heart soaring, feeling so full of him and loving the closeness. He looks you directly in the eyes, it’s intense and has you shying away from him, but he pulls your face back so you’re looking him in the eyes.

He watches your face carefully as he pulls out of you, his pace slow and steady, “You are beautiful.” He compliments you as you take his fat cock.

Your legs wrap around his waist, holding onto him. He holds your face still, making sure you keep your eyes on his, wanting to watch your face as you fall apart for him. His cock is rocking back and forth into you smoothly, never speeding up or slowing down, keeping pace. The unwavering manner of his strokes has you craving more but loving what you’re getting. Not wanting him to change anything and wanting so much more, he’s driving you crazy.

His expression is pleased as he watches the way you melt for him, the way your eyes glaze over, and mouth opens letting soft sounds of whimpers and moans fall from it. He offers you compliments the whole time he rocks into you.

“Doing so good for me, look so pretty right now… You always look so pretty,” he murmurs to you, his own eyes glazing over with the pleasure your cunt gives him.

You try to tell him how good you feel but you’re a bit scatter-brained at the moment, “Raiden, you feel –mmph– good, filling me so much –hah–”

He doesn’t seem to mind, enjoying the lost look in your eyes and incoherent compliments. His thrusts are still holding steady but you’re getting closer, his consistent pace working you up gradually. You’re throbbing around him, close to the edge. He’s twitching inside you, close to his own end as well.

“Want to cum at the same time,” his hand reaches down and rubs circles into your clit. His eyes stay on your face, never wanting to look away. The fingers on your clit have you right on the edge, about to fall off. He tells you, “Now, cum for me.”

And you do, very suddenly, and he cums as you do. Grinding into you as he releases his sticky cum inside you, it’s filling you completely. He’s still watching you, carefully taking in your expression as you come down from your orgasm. His own face pleasure filled, eyes lazy and content.

It occurs to you that you had been subconsciously waiting for his permission to cum, he has a soft domineering way about him that compels you. He’s polite as he tells you what to do, so much so that it doesn’t even seem like he’s telling you what to do.

“You look beautiful when you cum,” he compliments again, genuine as he does.

His compliment is embarrassing and has your cheeks heating up with it, he smiles at you and leans down to press a tender kiss against your lips. He kisses you for a moment, enjoying the closeness of being inside you while pressing his lips against yours, coming down from your highs together.

Eventually, he parts from you, careful as he pulls out. He rolls onto his back and takes you with him, leaving you resting against his chest. He’s comfortable, maybe more comfortable than his mattress.

“Is my mattress really better than yours or was this always your end goal?” His chest vibrates under you with his words.

You laugh a bit, “Your mattress is actually better, this was good too though.”

He hums a bit, “I have a feeling you will be in my bed even more frequently now.”

“Will that be my fault or yours?” You tease.

“Mine,” he answers, kissing the top of your head.

⊹₊ ⋆

#mk1 2023 #mk1 smut #raiden x reader #raiden x reader smut #raiden smut #raiden x you #raiden x you smut #raiden mk1 #fanfic #smut

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mmelionsblog · 3 months

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LIGHT SHOWER [sam golbach x reader]

a/n: this was requested by a special someone in my inbox (tysm for requesting and reading my work!!)

warnings: angst, cheating, mention of slight sex, cussing, fluff

it was another normal tuesday night with the two famous youtubers, sam and colby. you were invited to their house just to hang out with them and some of their other friends of course. though your boyfriend of the time, daniel, had called you for the past 20 minutes and had spammed your phone with too many messages to count.

you rolled your eyes at your phone, deciding to finally answer him. “yes, dan?” sam perked up at the mention of your boyfriend’s name. his eyes glared at nothing for a second, but quickly switched back to normal when a friend of his called him to set up a ping pong game. “please- hic- could you please come pick me up?” you clenched the bridge of your nose, annoyed that you had to leave early due to your douche of a boyfriend. “send me your address.” you heavily sighed.

you walked over to the coat racket, bringing your jacket and placing it on your body. “well. looks like i’m leaving early tonight guys,” you smiled sadly towards your friends. “no.., please don’t tell me it’s because of your douche-y boyfriend daniel?” devyn whined. “i’ll be the only girl here now.” you noticed sam snapped his head a bit rather quickly when you told them the information. “you’ll have tara arrive in a few, you’ll be fine dev.” you gave her a hug, waving to the others and walking to the door.

sam jogged slightly over to you, “are you sure you’re okay to drive? i’m sober and can easily take you home.” you waved him off, “i’m fine really. i only had a drink, barely. plus i’m out to go get daniel. that little piss of shit is already drunk and it isn’t even nine yet.”

sam huffed at that, “i seriously don’t know why you’re still with him.” your heart hammered at that. “we’re… high school sweethearts, sam. even if i ever wanted to leave him, we live in the same apartment.” sam chucked at that, “you can always stay at ours. i’m pretty sure colby wouldn’t mind, we both love you you know.”

you gave him a small smile. “and i really appreciate it, sam. i’ll text you when we arrive home safely. goodnight.” you gave him a side hug, and departed from the party. you walked to your car and put the destination into your phone and it was ten minutes away.

finally arriving there, it looked to be a sketchy apartment building. your face reeked of disgust by the way it looked, ‘must be a 2 star review. or maybe even lower..’ you shudder as you walked in.

your eyes locked to the lady at the front desk who gave you a weird look, “i’ve never seen you around this part of town. who are you here for?” she asked with a thick accent, you sighed. “my boyfriend.” you responded. she awe’d and went back to whatever the generation type of computer looking was on her desk.

you called daniel twice now, but he had declined. he finally sent you a message two minutes later with floor six and room number 665. you groaned, already knowing that it will smell of frat boys in the apartment and that you’ll have to drag daniel all the way down your car. thank goodness the front parking spot was not taken. as you reached the door, something felt odd.

there was no loud, banging music, and there wasn’t usual girls and guys making out in the corridor the party would be held at. you gulped, knocking on the door. you waited for a minute but no one seemed to be home— though you knew daniel was here since you saw his regular blazer out in the front laying dirty on the floor. ‘gross,’ you thought.

your heart hammered loudly enough for you to hear, and without even thinking you decided to slowly open the wooden brown old door in front of you and take a peek into the room. the hallway light was on and you then heard it. moans. daniel’s moans specifically, and a girls one at that too. it smelt disgusting as well with whatever was living in here. almost vomiting, you held it in together and walked towards the living room where the light was on and you could clearly see daniel getting fucked by two blonde complete naked women. and you snapped.

“what the FUCK,” you screamed. the three heads turn towards you, daniel’s mouth wide open as it was being used by a dildo toy from a women sticking it down his throat. “bb-baby,” he struggled to get out, his hand grabbing towards you. “do not EVER, call me baby. don’t even think for a second you can come back to me or the apartment either.”

you look at the two women who seemed to already be in their thirties, and you looked at them disgusted seeing how daniel was only 25. “we’re done. daniel, have a good life.” before you left, you looked around to see if he had the keys to the apartment and you spotted them scattered on the floor. you picked them up with your pinky, careful to try and not to touch it seeing as it was on the dirty nasty floor in the room with them.

as soon as you got into the lobby, the lady only looked at you and sighed. “i should’ve said it sooner baby, but this apartment is only used to for partners to cheat on their significant other’s and mostly— it’s usually threesomes that are in here.” she gave you a sympathetic look but you only looked at her in disgust, quickly leaving the place.

you got into your car, locking the doors seeing as it was now 10 a clock and you did not want any type of stranger trying to get into it. your eyes were blurry, and you didn’t even know if you could even drive back home let alone if you even wanted to go there.

then, you thought of sam. you bit your lip, contemplating if calling him up would be ruining the party for the others too. but you said ‘fuck it, i need him more than they need him.’ so you dialed in sam’s number, and after a second ring he answered. though you could barely hear him, seeing as the party got louder and music was blasting. “sam,” you hiccuped into the phone.

at the other end of the phone, sam’s eyes widen. he ignored the calls for his name, and rushed out to the window to where it was peaceful and quiet enough to hear you. “hey, hey are you okay? what happened? what did douche bag daniel do to you?” sam asked, bombarding you with questions.

you hiccuped even more, tears finally streaming down your face. “please pick me up, i don’t think i can drive right now at a time like this. i don’t feel safe here either.” you asked him, and even though he knew you didn’t see him, he nodded. “yes of course i’ll pick you up. i’ll get colby to drive his car and i’ll drive yours. where’s the address?” and you sent him the address as soon as he asked for it.

you sat there for a good ten minutes till you saw colby’s car pulling up. he parked next to you, and the two men got out. you were drenched in your own tears, shaking so little but they could still see you were a complete wreck. “i’m gonna fuck him up,” colby rolled his shoulder, walking up to the glass doors but sam immediately stopped him and signaled his head to you. “y-you don’t wanna go in there, trust me that place is nothing but filth.” you got out. your face not knowing what to chose, confusion, disgust, anger, sadness.

colby’s face held sympathy for you, giving you a big hug from the front. “alright. well tell me when you two go to your apartment—“ you cut him off there. “i was wondering if i could still attend the party? i don’t think i wanna go back..” you mumbled, your hand softly tugging on colby’s sleeve. he smiled, “of course you can come. and i’m gladly willingly to let you stay here too of course, in my room…” he wiggled his eyebrows, sam glared at him for that. “or sam’s! or sam’s… i guess.” he shrugged. he peaced the two of you out, getting into his car and driving back to their own apartment.

“i told you, colby wouldn’t have minded.” sam smiled at you. the two of you outside of the side door to your car. “thank you sam really, this means a lot to me.” you hugged him tightly, not wanting to let go. but a cough made you jump from it being so quiet outside at night. “the fuck are you doing with sam?” daniel slurred, staggering left and right. “i told you were done, daniel.” you glared at him. sam felt the tension and placed you behind him, his arm wrapped around your waist carefully. “please leave her alone.” sam spoke

daniel looked at him with wide eyes, “don’t tell me what to fucking do with my girlfriend,” he spat, another stagger towards sam. “get in the car,” he whispered into your ear. your eyes widen at when he told you that, but you listened nonetheless. “the fuck are you doing with her?!” daniel shouted, shoving sam. your eyes looked to daniel in horror when he tried to open your door, but sam of course sam pushed him back. “she’s not yours anymore, you fucked up.” sam shouted back, “and you known what? i’m glad you did. she never deserved you. you’re a fucking asshole!” sam shoved him all the way back to the doors and the last push had daniel flat to the floor.

“you’re a dead man when i get to you, samuel.” daniel sneered out, “you’ve done fucked up.” sam started off, “and i am so glad you did. now,” sam looked back at you who was looking through the windows down at them.

“i have her all to my self. and i will treat her so much more better than you ever have and ever will, she’s a queen and you and i both know that. but you fucked up.” sam pushed harshly onto daniel’s chest, his eyes glaring deep into daniel’s green ones. “she isn’t yours anymore.” sam sneered, walking away from the drunk man and getting into the car.

he huffed out, blowing his hair. “well tonight has been crazy.” you didn’t pay attention to him, more to daniel the way how he looked at sam as if he was the devil. you grinned slightly to sam, “what the hell did you say to him?” you laughed lightly.

sam side eyed you with a gaping smile, pulling out of the parking lot and driving back to his apartment “you don’t wanna know sweetheart.” at the mention of that nick name, your heart beat raced up and your cheeks were a bit red but you thanked it was late because if it wasn’t, sam definitely would’ve seen.

by the time you to got to sam and colby’s place, colby texted sam that he threw the party out for you. your heart ached, “you didn’t have to do that colby.” you said as you entered the kitchen where he was, already cleaning up the mess. “they’d be as confused to why you returned with tears down your face. i didn’t want them to bombared you with everything while you’re still trying to comprehend it all.” he smiled at you. you gave him a smile back, hugging him tightly.

“i don’t have any clothes to change to,” you spoke. you were in jeans and a silky sphageti silver top, so you felt uncomfortable in the outfit you picked tonight. “i got some clothes, go ahead and go take a shower if you want too,” sam ruffled your hair and you flipped him off, but thanked him and walked towards the shower.

after your nightly shower routine, you got out and called sam over. “i need underwear,” you breathed out awkwardly, embarrassment all over your face. sam’s face had reddened at that, “uh- uhm, well we don’t have any here… uh i can- hand you over some of my boxers?” he squeaked out. you chuckled nervously, “thanks sam. and a pair of tshirt and some basketball shorts maybe?” he nodded and left you, but came back a minute later. “here you go.” you thanked him once more and got dressed.

you walked out, dressed all in sam’s clothes and colby had spotted you. “wow, now look at that. sam is finally getting the girl,” your eyebrow raised. his face looked in horror as sam looked from behind him with a ‘she doesn’t know yet!’ look. “oh er— you know, kidding! kidding,” he laughed off. “i can help you clean,” you suggested. colby shrugged, “nah sam and i both got it. where are you sleeping by the way?” he asked you.

you totally forgot about that. “sam if you don’t mind…” you trailed off, your eyes towards his room. “of course! you can always use my room if you want. i’ll sleep in the living room.” your heart hammered. “oh! uhm, okay,” you gave him a small smile, then walked into his room.

colby looked at his best friend with a straight face. “dude. she clearly wanted you in there,” he spoke. sam looked at him, “it’s just—, i want to give her some time. as long as she needs. just because as soon as she’s off the market, doesn’t mean she probably wants to date just now.” he mumbled. “yeah but, you could at least comfort her more.” colby smirked. sam rolled his eyes at him, and flipped him off. “i’m gonna go talk to her,” sam spoke. “hey! you need to clean too.” sam waved him off once more.

he knocked slightly on his own white door, opening a crack. he saw you on his bed, comfy with your phone out. “sam,” you smiled. he smiled back. “hi,” he spoke. he closed the door behind him, and sat on his bed next to you. “you know you can sleep here too, it is your bed after all.” you said. sam’s eyes widen, “are you sure? i don’t wanna push you a bit overboard.” you giggled at that, “sam i’m inviting you too. this is YOUR bed.” and so he climbed, he was already in his pajamas and got comfy into the bed.

“i’m sorry about your ex.” he mumbled, playing with his thumbs. “it was bound to happen. he was getting rather annoying this past couple of months, and being such a dick to my friends, and especially to you more often. which i never got,” you scoffed. but you could feel the moment sam froze. “do you want to know what i said to him, when we were fighting?” he asked you.

you looked at him and nodded. “i’ve been thinking about that since we’ve got here.” sam took a deep breath and breathed. “we started fighting about you. i told him how he fucked up, you deserved better. that you are a queen, and he lost the only good queen he’d ever find in this life..” he mumbled, “and that i was glad he lost you.” you looked at him confused, and he looked at you right back.

“i was so glad to hear you finally had broken up with him, because ive liked you for too long.” sam breathed. your breathing came to a halt, shock was written all over your face. “it’s okay if you don’t wanna be a thing or a thing at this moment,” he reassured you. “or if you don’t even like me—“ he was cut off from you, when he felt lips on his.

his eyes widen at that, but soon closed softly. “we can take it slow.” you spoke after you broke the kiss, “please let’s take it both slow. daniel was my ever fist everything, seeing as he was my high school sweetheart. so sam, if you do wish to date me, i want to do it the right way with you.” sam nodded, his head softly placed on yours. “it’s okay if we cuddle though, tonight?” he asked sheepishly, you smiled brightly and giggled just a little bit, “i suppose it’s okay.”

and after a bit more talking, the two of you got into a cute night position. you as the little spoon, and sam as the big spoon, protecting you from anything that would happen.

A/N: it has been MONTHSS since i’ve uploaded a fic, but here is one that was requested! thanks to the one and only anon! tysm :) (even if it took two months because i felt unmotivated and a bit busy at the time)

#x reader #sam golbach x you #sam and colby x reader #sam golbach x reader #sam golbach #colby brock x y/n #colby brock x reader #colby brock #sam and colby

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absolutebl · 6 months

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This Week in BL - Japan is Winning on Kisses & Other Alternate Realities

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

March 2024 Wk 4

Ongoing Series - Thai

Two Worlds (Thurs IQIYI) ep 3 of 10 - It would be great if we got the alternative romance with dead Kram from Tai’s perspective (JBL style.) Still I like this show. It’s a little bit like I Feel You Linger in the Air only with a love triangle. And while I'm not a fan of triangles as a general rule, I don’t mind it here because the set up is clever. Wayu and ao are fun sides too. It sure is moving very quickly, which I like. I’m not entirely sure what’s going on. But that’s normal for me with this kind of Thai drama.

Deep Night (Thurs iQiyi) ep 4 of 8 - They are extremely sappy boyfriends. I love that mom has a secret gf. Could we please have more of them? The love triangle sides are ridiculous, but I do like that it’s all out in the open. I also like they are actually addressing the complicated parental dynamics of owning a sex club. Honestly, I think Khem should have to be a host too. Learn him the right way, girl!

City of Stars (Fri iQIYI) ep 9 of 12 - It’s good, I like the fallout and them actually having to deal with crazy fans and past relationships. They’re so good at communicating it’s kind of a pleasure to watch them suffer through external pressures, because I have faith that they can make it through.

To Be Continued (Thai C3 Thailand grey) ep 6 of 8 - They are such cute puppy dads and so clearly meant to be together, the fact that they aren’t is just frustrating. The fight thing was stupid. And not a whole lot happened... plus singing. I’m getting fatigued with this one.

1000 Years Old ep 7 of 12 - Did I miss something happening, or did nothing happen?

Kiseki Chapter 2 (Sun iQIYI) ep 2 of 6 - It’s so boring, there’s so much guitar playing, and it got weirdly voyeuristic (in a very much not sexy way). I’m totally out. DNF

Close Friend Season 3: Soju Bomb! (Weds iQIYI) ep 3 of 6 - I can’t tell if this is trying to be a BL Romancing the Stone, or a BL Hangover, or both. The problem with situational comedy is it must be both situational and comedic, not just option one. The problem with calling something BL, is that it must be BL. This show got 1 of 3 claims correct. 33% is not a passing grade. DNF

Honestly, it's the HANDS with these two. They do beautiful beautiful things with their hands. If you're one of those hands-obsessed BLabies you should be watching LIBTSTA!

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Unknown (Taiwan Tues Youku YouTube & Viki) ep 6 of 11 - So the worst finally happened. The mountain of pain has fallen down upon us. And now, hopefully in the second half things get better for our boys. But what a rough ride. Normally, this is not my style of BL, but everyone is doing such a gorgeous job with it, I can’t fault it… except that it hurts. The red thread symbolism was elegantly done. I’d like to hope we get a reunion in the next one, but knowing this style of series they’re gonna draw it out. There's gonna be a more pain first.

Love is Better the Second Time Around AKA Koi wo Suru nara Nidome ga Joto (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 4 of 6 - Those fuck me puppy dog eyes were perfectly executed. I would not have been able to resist either. Gosh they are so damn cute. This is a great show.

Jazz for Two (Korea Gaga/grey) eps 1-2 of 8 - This comes from the Shoulder to Cry On team so I'm scared, but this one is all actors* not idols so maybe they'll be braver. Boy howdy does it have a fantastic opening sequence. Also the lead is fucking adorable. Mr Broody McBroodypants is cute too. Korea sure loves “pretty but broken.” On the JBL end of the spectrum, is everyone in love with their siblings? That’s weird. The dining room scene was painful. All in all, it's good, I'm intrigued. Let's see how you go little show.

I stand absolutely corrected the lead is a member of NEWKIDD (in my defense I'd never heard of them until Build Up last month). I did recognize him from To My Star because at the time I thought he was too pretty to be only a side character.

AntiReset (Taiwan Fri Viki/Gaga) ep 10 fin - Again there was overuse of previous footage and maudlin navel-gazing grief over something we knew was going to happen. So I didn’t really feel much emotional connection to the drama. 7 year time gap.? t was a cute reunion but the moral quandary never really got resolved. I don’t know how to rate this, I’m not sure I will ever watch it again, so that is a big mark against it.

There’s nothing objectively wrong with this BL except how upsetting it is because of the foundational pygmalion story - grown man falls in love with an android who is basically both his slave and, by maturity level, a child. Yet that premise is crystal clear from the get go, so we watch it eyes open. The actors are cute, the romance sweet, the physical chemistry on point (of course, it’s Taiwan) and yet I was left ultimately unsettled by the concept, content, and plot. 7/10

My Strawberry Film (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 7 of 8 - I'm so ready for this to be over, and for Gaga to have something good on. Soon please?

It's done, ready to binge, but I suck

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps

It's airing but...

Graduation Countdown (Taiwan YouTube) - It's too much to ask me to keep up with 2 minute verticals, I don't have that kind of TikTok endurance training. Waiting to binge.

A Secretly Love (Thai Sat WeTV grey) 10 eps - I watched the first ep but grey is too much work for this inferior of a show. I may pick up and binge if it gets distribution but for now, it gets a DNF from me. KimCop might have held this crap together but Kim without Cop? No thank you.

Lady Boy Friends (Thai WeTV grey) 16 eps - reminds me a bit too much of Diary of Tootsies only high school. Not my thing. DNF unless it turns a corner and is truly amazing.

Tangential to the genre

There has been the occasional discussion on this topic here in this little corner of tumblr so I thought there might be a few intersted in this podcast: AmericanThaiGuy Ron Weaver on the Complicated Issue of Racism in Thailand (The Bangkok Podcast)

Thailand passed its Marriage Equality bill through the lower house. It's expected to pass the high house and get signed by the King, but that hasn't quite happened yet.

And MaxTul dropped a photo shoot.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Starting Soon

3/31 Only Boo! (Thai GMMTV YouTube) 12 eps - New main couple for GMMTV in an idol romance about a boy who dances good and a food stand vendor. Other side of the tracks grumpy/sunshine pair who fall deeply in love but, of course, baby boy idol can't date. Boyband but from GMMTV? Control your singing and I'm game.

3/31 The Next Prince (Thai ????) 12 eps - trailer. ZeeNew in a fantasy/historical set in a palace where Zee plays a knight and Nu a prince - YES PLEASE. (Apparently this is just the pilot, not the start of the actual show, see comments.)

4/1 Love is like a Cat (Korea ????) 12 eps - This completed filming Aug 2022(!) which means there have been serious problems with post-production. This is another of Silkwood's Korean+Thai colab projects. Mew Suppasit plays a rookie film star, called the Cat Prince (for his cold arrogance) who goes up against a charismatic puppyish animal daycare director (JM of JUST B). There is a side romance (love triangle?) with a veterinarian. Geonu of JUST B is also in the cast. Dual languages.

Hum, trash-watch-a-licious?

4/3 We Are (Thai GMMTV YouTube iQIYI) 12 eps - University ensemble BL featuring PondPhuwin, WinnySatang, AouBoom, MarcPawinPoon - basically the good kind of messy gay friendship group (so more My Engineer and less Only Friends). Looks a bit like the Kiss series but everyone is queer. I'm IN!

4/11 Living With Him AKA Kare no Iru Seikatsu (Japan ????) 10 eps - Kindly Ryota goes off to uni only to find his new roommate is his childhood bestie, Kazuhito. Kazuhito doesn’t have a girlfriend and Ryota tries to help him figure out why, they fall in love along the way. Same director as Old Fashion Cupcake.

4/11 Gray Shelter AKA Gray Currents (Korea ????) 4 eps - SooHyuk is only just surviving and reunites with YoonDae, an old friend. They end up living together. One of the leads is played by Choco of Choco Milk Shake.

4/18 At 25:00, in Alaska AKA 25 Ji, Akasaka de (Japan Gaga - may not be global) 10 eps - Yuki lands his first starring role in a BL drama alongside superstar Asami (previously his senior at uni). Said superstar suggests they form a sham relationship until filming concludes. As they actually begin to fall in love, the spotlight begins to burn.

Seriously? You're killing me with these titles, boys.

4/26 My Stand-In (Thai iQIYI) 12 eps - adaptation of Chinese novel "Professional Body Double" by Shui Qiang Cheng. Stars Up (Lovely Writer) and Poom (Bake Me Please) directed by the same team as KP (not a recommendation IMHO - my biggest criticism of that show was the clashing directing styles). This one looks well complicated, lemme try: Joe is a stuntman for famous actor Tong. Joe falls in love with Ming but Ming sees Joe as nothing more than a Tong-replacement. After learning this horrible truth, Joe dies. Joe then wakes up in the body of another man also named Joe. He manages to rebuild the same life as before—with the same people eventually re-meeting Ming. Ming wants Joe back but Joe doesn't understand why. But Ming seems to know what's going on and wants to give him some kind of explanation.

I'm exhausted just trying to describe the plot.

Knock-Knock Boys (Thai WeTV) - 4 college friends conspire to help their friend lose his virginity. Familiar faces like Seng (yes, Billy's previous partner) and Best, news here.

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

NOTE: It looks like one of my personal favorites of last year Unintentional Love Story is getting a spin off!

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENT

Just these two, in my head, rent free. Thanks Japan!

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are too much work.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @rocketturtle4

If ya wanna be tagged each week leave a comment and I will add you to the template. Easy peesy. (With so many tags when does a weekly tumblr post become a newsletter? That is this week's philosophical question...)

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devildomditzy · 16 days

Text

Mammon SFW A-Z

🎂Happy birthday to my beautiful jpeg husband

🎂 I ain’t even gonna lie this is so rushed 😭 but I wanted to get something out for his birthday in time!

🎂 This is more so based off of OG game Mammon and not Nightbringer Mammon

🎂 SFW besides some cursing

🎂 A-Z template by tumblr user @/the-coldest-goodbye

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

He has a very hard time showing affection in a public setting. Even in front of his brothers, he sometimes panics - getting all red in the face - which usually ends with him denying his feelings for you or outright insulting you (why would he want to be with a stupid human anyways?, etc.)

In private, he is the most annoying motherfucker you have to peel him off of you most days. Earlier into the relationship, it was shy touches mixed with blushing. Now that you’re comfortable with each other, you have 0 personal space. Because hey, what’s yours is his - and that includes your bubble, right MC?

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

We already know the answer to this one, as he was literally written in game to be the ‘best friend’ archetype. Mammon starts crass and rude, acting like you’re a bother and he’d rather be anywhere else but next to you. Your friendship starts once Lucifer assigns him to be your guardian. Though he acted like he hated it, Mammon quickly became fond of you. Now you’re his inseparable partner in crime.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

The minute you are home from RAD and you both have changed out of your uniforms, he’s pulling you into his room, on to his bed, and not letting go of you. Sometimes he doesn’t even wait for you to change. He’s clingy, okay! Why would you wanna be anywhere else but layin’ with him?

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Mammon already feels like you are. His home is the HOL, with his brothers. And now, his home includes you. It’s his ideal scenario.

Plus he doesn’t have to pay rent.

He can be good at both tasks if he actually applies himself, but only seems to do it if you specifically ask him to. If Lucifer asks him to cook or clean, the room still feels dirty and everything is burnt. You almost think he does it on purpose.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Listen-

He literally couldn’t.

Once you and Mammon are together, he can’t see a future without you. He can’t see his life without you.

If it was ever broken off, it would be a scenario where he means well, thinking you would be happier or safer, generally better off without him.

But he is greed and even the thought of it upsets him to no end.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

The boy cried watching Cinderella ofc he wants to get married! But he couldn’t imagine to whom until you came into his life. Something just clicked for him. You’re his best friend, his partner in crime, you’re his. I don’t think it would be quick, as a matter of fact he’s way too tsundere for that. But he’s sure once he’s ready, it’ll definitely be you.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

It depends! So we know he’s the second strongest, so in that regard if he wants to be he can be far from gentle. But when it comes to you and his brothers, he consciously trying to be softer. Emotionally? Boys a wreck. A huge softie. Please hold him.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Once again, please hold him. Even if he acts like he hates it sometimes, your hugs are something he looks forward to. When he feels awkward in public he’ll give you one of those weird barely touching you side hugs. But in private? Have fun trying to get him off you.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

So we know canonically when this happens (I believe it was around end of season one of the og game?) and we know he says it plenty after that. We don’t have an exact way to know how much time passes between episodes, but you can assume it took about a year as that was the end of MC’s exchange program originally.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Ooooooooh while he may not be like Levi embodying envy, when it comes to you he’s ridiculously jealous. He’s your ‘first’, remember? If it’s something that’s making him jealous relating to his brothers (i.e. hanging out with someone other than him), he’ll pretend he doesn’t care to the point of being a giant dick about it, inadvertently showing he actually does care a lot.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Honestly? Most of the time they’re timid and shy. He holds you in the highest regard, he adores you though he may not show it very well. You still make him blush like crazy and his stomach still stirs every time he looks at you.

Other times they’re possessive and passionate, he is the avatar of greed after all. But really, his style depends whether or not you take the lead.

His favorite place to get kissed is the neck/collarbone area

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Another one we canonically know! He’s great with them. He probably the most emotionally intelligent of his brothers and actually cares greatly about the things that matter to him. His brothers and you are everything to him, but that little girl back in the human realm that he takes care of? She means the world to him too. He’d be devastated if something happened to her. Meeting you, the thought of having your own child pops into his head every now and again, and it makes his heart melt. But whether or not you have children is something he leaves entirely up to you, not pressuring or pushing you about it. All in all, he’s a natural at taking care of them.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

If it’s a school day, most the times Lucifer forces you both to sleep separately in your own rooms. He’ll knock on your door at the same time everyday to walk you down to breakfast with the others, and then off to school. It’s very routine.

If it’s a lazy day, or a weekend, he’s clingy. Have fun trying to get him out of bed, and if he has anything to say about it, you won’t be doing anything productive either.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

School nights are spent having to be separated most of the time per Lucifer’s rules which Mammon says are ‘totally unfair’ and ‘dumb’ and whatever other negative thing he can think of. But he’s going to call you. Relentlessly even, if you don’t pick up right away. He’ll talk your ear off into the night until one of you falls asleep on the other line of the phone.

Weekend nights are spent out on the town, he wants to go to places like casinos and The Fall, so if you let him drag you along too, he’s elated.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Since he puts up such a front with his feelings, it’s hard for him to get really mushy or personal. Once he begins to trust you more (and fall for you) the speed at which he tells you everything quickens, and he becomes an open book.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He seems to be easily angered by his brothers teasing him, but knowing him as well as you do, you can tell he’s never really actually mad at them. He could never be. The only time you’ll see him actually get mad is if something happens to you or one of them.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He’ll pretend like he doesn’t remember every single little detail you’ve told him, but mentally he’s taking notes every time you open your mouth. He hangs off your every word, so he knows things ranging from general facts about you to your most deep, personal secrets. And he won’t forget a single word (even if he may act like he did)

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Mammon’s favorite moment in your relationship was your first trip to Devil’s Coast together. He’s honestly not even sure if you considered that a date, since you were actively looking for Lucifer and Diavolo, but he certainly does. No. 3’s commentary didn’t help at all. He gets embarrassed when he thinks about it, but he loves it all the same. He keeps the picture you took together in his wallet.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He was literally assigned to essentially be your own demon bodyguard, so yes, he’s very protective of you. At first it was because it was an obligation, then it was because he was intrigued with you, and it quickly morphed into because he’s in love with you.

He’s shocked anytime you stand up for him or defend him in anyway. He’s not used to his brothers defending him in conversations, and is surprised to see you do it. Honestly, he feels like he doesn’t deserve it because of how much he looks down on himself. And you’re this tiny human stepping up to the plate, sometimes risking your life for him? Honestly he finds it hot.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

The most try hard that ever tried hard. Even if he tries to pretend what he’s doing for you is a favor, or the gift he got you was nothing special, it’s always something ridiculously couriered to you and your tastes, or something you physically said you wanted out loud. You could have said you wanted something three months ago. A year ago even. But he’ll always remember and always make sure you get it one way or another.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He’s literally the avatar of greed, so obviously there’s that. He can lose control sometimes when it comes to grim, or his obsession with both his belongings and with you.

But, I think Mammon’s worst bad habit is how negatively he thinks about himself. You’ll always need to check in on him from time to time to make sure he’s not spiraling in his mind. But when he does, you’re the best person to pull him out of it.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He’s concerned to a degree being a model and all, but definitely nowhere near Asmo standards of vanity. He’s the kind of person who always looks good without trying. The most effort he’ll put into anything is his outfits, especially if it’s an outfit he’s wearing to go out with you. Besides that, he’s not too concerned.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

His world would shatter.

Now that he’s met you, and now that he’s almost lost you countless of times, he could never ever see a future for himself that doesn’t have you in it.

He doesn’t want any future without you in it.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

He goes through your things. With good intentions of course!!! Why would you think anything else??

Okay maybe at first it was to sell your stuff. But now that he’s with you, he only does it to see what you’re into at the moment so he can gauge the best gift he can get for you, or what date he can take you out to.

He lives for the sparkle in your eye that you get when he does that kind of stuff, so while not an amazing thing to do, his looking is not malicious.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He doesn’t like people who are assholes for no reason. Sure, he can see why someone would act aggressively if he knows the why they are, but if they’re just doing it to do it or for some self serving reason, he dislikes them.

And though he is a model, he also doesn’t like people who are too full of themselves. He’s already got an Asmo at home, why would he need another one of em’?

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

He is terrible at falling asleep.

And even worse at waking up.

He becomes accustomed to staying out late or just talking to you late into the night, so his sleep cycle is horrendous.

Once he does fall asleep, have fun trying to wake him up. We all know how great that went for Levi when he was trying to get his figure back :)

#kit’s playhouse #obey me #om #mammon #omswd #obey me shall we date #obey me mammon #obey me mc #obey me nightbringer #mammon headcannons #mammon x mc #mammon x reader #omnb #obey me nightbringer mammon #mammon headcanon #obey me headcanons #mammon drabbles

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a-998h · 8 months

Note

Okay so I’m back for another SAGAU request if you don’t mind..😊 Basically another situation where the Creator descends to Teyvat blah blah blah… But instead- they came back as a child?! The Archons and others found this weird at first, but tried to adjust to this. But the thing about (Reader) is that they aren’t from our world, they’re from a world where monsters and such exist, and they kill those monsters even at their young age. (Reader) was confused at first, and tried to get used to it, but was pretty excited when they found out monsters and such existed, as they excitedly liked to run off and kill monsters while some Archons will be chasing after them telling them to slow down. Though one thing about (Reader) is they judge everyone. And one thing they’re most confused about is people’s physics, like the characters that are extremely strong and fight. (Reader) always comes up to certain characters and asks “Why are you so scrawny? Where are your muscles? Don’t you train?” (Yes this was one of the first thoughts I had thought of when I saw certain characters in Genshin Impact🥲) Like for characters like Wanderer, Xiao, Diluc, Zhongli and even other female characters as well! (Reader) would even ask them to eat with them, because they worried that they needed more protein to become stronger and build more muscle. Though I’m not even sure if muscle = strength in Genshin Impact in general. Some characters were shocked to say the least when they saw (Reader) a child in like a T-shirt, and they have like the most muscley arms😭Or they ask questions like how EI can pull a sword from her boobs.

And every character since their weapons somehow magically appear and disappear, which (Reader) was fascinated with since their weapons have to be on their body, because they can’t summon weapons.

Hope this request isn’t too wierd!

-🍉 Anon

Ok 🍉 Anon, let's start with the Archons. I'll be using the characters you mentioned because this is fucking awesome.

"Why are you so scrawny? Where are your muscles? Don’t you train?"

Venti

He just stares at you

Then laughs

He explains that as a bard, he doesn't need to have muscles or train

He enjoys the starry eyed look you get whenever his weapon just appears and disappears

Your monster killing makes him very worried

Everything you get somewhat close to a monster, Venti will lead you away until someone else kills it

But he is also very proud of your strength

Will try and teach you how to summon weapons, with no luck

Zhongli

Old man chuckle

Doesn't take the question seriously

He'll just pat your head and tell you it's his secret

Whenever his spear appears and disappears he also loves the starry eyed look you get

Your monster killing will be the reason he dies of a heart attack

Please child, don't kill the old man

He treats you like his own grandchild

Would have Xiao train you if you went so young

Says he'll teach you how to summon weapons when you're older

She turns the question on you

She then make you train with her

Your monster killing both frightens her, because she doesn't want you to die but on the other hand it's impressive

Face goes red when you ask about her boob sword

Tells you it's an Archon power

If you ask why you can't do that, she'll just say go ask your mother Yae Miko

Has Sara train you sometimes

Has tried and failed to help you summon a weapon

Nahida

Laughs

She doesn't see the point of muscles without brains, plus she is young, ever for an archon

You're both similar age

Would summon her weapon just to see the stars in your eyes

She thought you two had a similar personality, until you killed a hilichurl that was gonna attack you both

In shock

Told her friends all about and now your Sumeru aunties and uncles were fussing over you

Will help you find someone to teach you weapon summoning

Furina

She says something about not needing muscles

Get a self esteem boost whenever you look at her weapon in wonder

She thinks you both don't need to have muscles because you have powers

The first time she sees you kill a monster, she stares in silent horror befoe telling Neuvillette what you did

Now, you have two powerful beings who are overprotective of you

Will definitely try to teach you weapon summoning

Wanderer

Gives you a look of indignation

Just says it's none of you business

Gets smug af whenever you get excited about his weapon summoning

He doesn't want to tell you that he's a puppet

First time he sees you killing a monster, he smiles

Proud that you're so strong and will train you just to spite Ei

Will get frustrated that you can't summon weapons, even when you train with him

Xiao

He doesn't answer, he has no idea himself

I think it's because his adepti form is a finch

When it comes to your monster killing outside: 😐 but on the inside: 😨

Treffied of you getting karmic debt and that you would get hurt because of it

He is horrified at your monster killing

He sees you as a sister sometimes and well, we know he has trauma

He gets a small smile when you look on in awe at his spear summoning

Will train you in order to protect yourself

Diluc

Asks how you know

To be honest, he could have muscle because he swigs that damn claymore around

Is protective of you because to him you're, small bean

When he sees you kill a monster, he world is shattered

Will get mad and will make you promise him to stop killing monsters

When he finds you breaking that promise, he sighs and gets mad

When you look up in awe at his weapon, he feels a bit happy

If you ask, more like beg, him to try and teach you weapon summoning he'll give in and try

#genshin fanfic #cult au #sagau #creator!reader #sagau lore #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #child reader #Child creator reader

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captainfern · 8 months

Text

fern rant below lol

yk one thing i have noticed both on tiktok, here and the rest of the internet is the “pornification” of media

by that i mean the standards people are being held to in regards of sexual attraction or just “beauty standards in general” and how there is this sudden increase of ideals and values built on the foundation of toxic pornography

i mean there are several examples, but the most common ideals you see typically relate to someone’s body and someone’s body hair and i have a bit to say on the matter, especially as someone who creates “pornographic” content

let’s talk body first

you are beautiful. it does not matter whether the internet perceives you as anything more or less than that. you are beautiful exactly the way you are

the pornification of modern media will tell you that you have to look a certain way. you will be told you can’t be plus-size, or you can’t be too skinny, or you can’t be tall, or you can’t lack curves, or you can’t have hyperpigmentation, etc. don’t listen to that bullshit

you are beautiful and i luv you

i don’t want to see negative body image portrayed in fanfic: x reader’s can be plus-size, they can be tall, they can have no curves. they are x reader for a reason !!! the reader should be described as little as possible !!!

and in saying that, yeah, your favourite fictional characters would fuck a bigger person. they’d fuck a taller person. they’d love you for you and be completely and utterly obsessed with you. “but actually— 🤓☝️” shut up please <3

now body hair

its natural !!! it grows !!!

if you don’t wanna shave, don’t shave. if you wanna shave, shave. baby it’s your choice. do what YOU want. don’t let anybody else influence you and your body

the pornification of modern media has really fucked this kind of thinking up because people (a lot of men unfortunately) think they can dictate the way people / women present themselves ??? gtfo what lmao

“body hair is nasty, body hair is unnatural, body hair is unhygienic”— honey please don’t. it’s not any of these things. body hair is completely ok (and so is not wanting it on you ofc— as long as it’s your decision, not the persuasion of anyone else)

i saw a tiktok of these guys being like “oh i’d never have sex with someone who didn’t shave” and “ew i’d never eat hairy puss” brother you literally suck (it’s ok to have preference, but don’t make it out to be vile or weird or something other people have to agree with)

it’s natural. it’s normal. it’s perfectly hygienic if you keep it that way. if you meet someone like the guys i mentioned above, they ain’t worth your time

and yeah, john price and simon riley and johnny mactavish and kyle garrick would fuck you and eat you out if you didn’t shave cause they’re MEN

love yourself because you’re beautiful and i’m telling you so right now !!!

i felt the need to say this as i write pornography. i write x readers. i try to keep everything regarding body as neutral as possible (and if i ever fuck up, please let me know !!)

i often write about “fat” or “flesh” in my writing but that’s because i don’t see a lot of fics with it. if you want something different, specify in a request and i will write your request more to your liking <3 i want everyone to feel accepted and welcome here because it’s important !!!

on that note, you won’t catch me writing about “bare pussy” or “hairless legs” or whatever. i try to keep it all up to your imagination !!! (you will find hairy men tho !!! the lads i write for will always be hairy but that’s cause i’m a whore)

anyway i luv you and you are so so so beautiful and i hope you have an amazing day / night wherever you may be

this post is not an attack or anything of the sort. i’m just speaking my mind :)

lots of luv <3

#captainfern #fern talks about societal issues for some reason when she probably should be writing about john price or something

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eggroll-sama · 4 months

Text

THINGS THAT REMIND ME OF THE LI

This is purely self-indulgent and just based on stuff that makes me go, “it’s them!” when it’s unrelated to them. But here you go and hope you like it. To make it sound more accurate, I replaced the nouns to fit Touchstarved cast.

AIS

Tyler Durban and Edward Norton from the FIGHT CLUB— “How much can you know about yourself if you’ve never been in a fight?” “Maybe self-improvement isn’t the answer, maybe self-destruction is the answer,” “Only after you’ve lost everything you’re free to do anything.” “We are the same person.”

The song, ‘I Remember You’ from ADVENTURE TIME— “I can feel myself slipping away, I can’t remember what it made me say, but I remember that I saw you frown, I swear it wasn’t me…And I need to save you, but who's going to save me? Please forgive me for whatever I do, when I don’t remember you.”

The punk from FERRIS BUELLER’S DAY OFF. I can just see Ais at a police station, giving advice to a pretty stranger, and end up making out with them.

This scene (warning: graphic violence and gore) from ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD. It’s just so Ais and Princess-coded

VENOM, enough said.

KURAS

The murder-mystery film, THE DA VINCI CODE. I feel like Kuras would love the movie if it existed in his world since it’s canon that he likes trashy murder mysteries.

The song, ‘No Good Deed Goes Unpunished’ from WICKED— “[MC] where are you? Already dead, or bleeding? One more disaster I can add to my Generous supply…No good deed goes unpunished. No act of charity goes unresented. No good deed goes unpunished. That’s my new creed.”

GONE WITH THE WIND— “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.” This line was controversial when released in 1939 because swear words weren’t normalized. I feel like Kuras, like this movie, rarely swears but when he does, the whole room goes silent and you know shit’s about to go down. Also according to the RSS radial chart, Kuras has low empathy plus maxed out strength high wisdom, damn at some point that man might legit not give a damn-

MAQUIA: WHEN THE PROMISED FLOWER BLOOMS— “you smell weird, you smell like the sun;” “If you fall in love, you will truly become alone.” Contextually the line is about how an immortal should never get too close with mortals because they'll one day they’ll die, and it fits Kuras a lot.

HUNTER X HUNTER 2011—“[MC] you are light. Sometimes, you shine so brightly, I must look away. But even so, is it still ok to stay by your side?” I love the idea of an angel heavily associated with the sun (Prometheus, likes sunny days, radiates heat), finds someone that is the light of their life.

ONE PIECE— “I have seen the future of this country. And it is destruction. As long as [the Senobium] remains here, this country can never be cured, because even if medical technology progresses, even if [alchemical] research continues… there is no cure for stupidity.”

OPPENHEIMER. After I watched the movie all I could think about was Kuras doing the blank eye stare at the end of the movie.

LEANDER

Goob from MEET THE ROBINSONS (he’s literally just child Leander in the modern world ;o;)

Michael Scott from THE OFFICE— “I wanna be married and have 100 kids so I can have 100 friends and no one can say no to being my friend,” “it’s not about the horniness, it’s about the loneliness”

The painting, Death of Sardanapalus, by Eugene Delacroix. King Sardanapalus palace is besieged by enemies and he decides to commit suicide after he learns of the army’s defeat, but not before ordering his men to destroy all his favorite possessions- wives, horses, pages, and dogs. He’d rather his valuables all be destroyed than his enemies own them. King Sardanapulus selfishness is humane, but the extremity’s he would go to keep what is his is monstrous.

GASTON from BEAUTY AND THE BEAST— Gaston and Leander both have similar vibes. They’re both trusted and well-liked by most people, viewed as heroes, are human but are monsters on the inside, overconfident, attractive, has a possessive streak, hangs out in bars, nice singing voice. The main difference is that Gaston doesn’t try to act like a nice guy like Leander Fake ahhh

The song ‘Burn’ from HAMILTON— “Do you know what [Vere] said when we saw your first letter arrive? [He] said, be careful with that one, love, he will do what it takes to survive…Do you know what [Kuras] said when [he] read what you’d done? [He] said, you’ve married an Icarus, he has flown too close to the sun.”

Michael Corleone from the GODFATHER.

Sampo from HONKAI STAR RAIL— I barely know anything about Honkai Starrail, but I was going to an anime goods store with my friend and one look at him made me think of Leander. My friend gave me a run down that he betrays you for money and runs away and unironically I could see Leander throwing us under the bus.

VERE

This scene from the movie, MALENA. Vere is heavily desired by men and women alike, but his flirty and fickle personality is just a front to protect himself. And he hates how people see him as a pretty face or someone who needs saving from the Senobium. Tbh Malena herself just reminds me of Vere’s problem of how being pretty is a double edged sword. People see you’re pretty, so they feel threatened or idealize you. You feel extremely lonely bc people are distracted by your beauty and won’t try to understand you intimately. So you either own it and be alone OR assimilate and have friends. Vere is the former.

Madonna-Whore Complex. This article explains it pretty well, “The Madonna Whore Complex (MWC) is a psychological complex often perpetuated by heterosexual, cisgender males which places women into two categories the “Madonna, a woman who is pure, virtuous, and nurturing, or a “Whore,” a woman who is deemed as overly sexual, manipulating, and promiscuous. The dichotomy of MWC creates a rigidity that limits women’s sexual expression, agency, and freedom by defining their sexuality into one of two categories.” Vere is the latter.

Ymir from ATTACK ON TITAN. Both of them were self-proclaimed deity, was caught lying (presumably), and paid for it. Their personalities are similar too except Vere masks himself through innuendos.

The song, ‘The Red Means I Love You’ by Madds Buckley— “The red on my face is matching you. And goodness, you're bleeding, what a wonderful feeling. You're down and you're pleading, my head is just reeling. The red means I love you. Tasting your blood means I love you.” (I can’t see Vere becoming a yandere because he’s already deranged)

MHIN

Another line from ONE PIECE —“Someday I will become too much of a burden. Someday you’ll betray me and cast me aside.”

SHUTTER ISLAND— “What would be worse, to live as a monster or die as a good [person]?” Mhin hates monsters ironically since they are one, and I could see them nearing the time limit where their curse becomes permanent and decides that maybe it’s better to die with their humanity than live forever as a monster.

The Beast from BEAUTY AND THE BEAST. I already said this in another post but like IMAGINE THE AU. AHHHHHH

Felix from LAST LEGACY but more depressed.

Disclaimer: we don’t know much about Sen or Elyon yet so I don’t have much.

ELYON

THE GREAT GATSBY— “…can't you see who this guy is, with his house and his parties and his fancy clothes? He is just a front, a gangster, to get his claws into respectable folk…(to Elyon) We're all different from you. You see, we were born different. It's in our blood. And nothing that you do or say or steal... or dream up can ever change that.”

SEN

Unfortunately I don’t have any for Sen. Her design reminds me of Frankenstein’s creature tho.

BONUS:

This scene from SHAPE OF WATER. MC falls in love with a monster and trying to save them from danger. MC knows that they are also an outsider, a monster. Being with the LI’s feels like they were finally accepted for who they are, regardless of their curse, so they can’t abandon them— “When they looks at me…the way they looks at me, they don’t know what I lack. How I am incomplete...and now I can either save them or let them die.” I think this quote can also be interpreted as the players choosing a route, essentially dooming the other players if we don’t choose them.

Famous line from 10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU— “but mostly I hate how I don’t hate you, not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.” The fact that us as players will keep coming back to them, replaying their routes even though they killed us, and obsessing over them. Yes they suck but we still love them.

This quote from Green Mile— “ I’m tired…I'm tired of bein' on the road, lonely as a sparrow in the rain. Tired of not ever having me a buddy to be with.” I think this quote really emphasizes how touch-starved MC is, and how alone they feel from being betrayed by people they cared about in the past (also sparrow name drop ^-^)

#this took me very long #two months HAHA #well here you go #ik I’m inactive on here I promise I’m not dead #I’ve been in a twist brain rot #Touchstarved Leander #touchstarved game #touchstarved kuras #touchstarved vere #touchstarved ais #touchstarved elyon #touchstarved mhin #Vere #Mhin #Ais #Leander #Kuras

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olderthannetfic · 3 months

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Do you (or anyone reading this) know how to tell if a fic is AI generated? I found a bunch of oneshots for my otp on AO3, all by the same person, with typically under 500 words. (And the header info like summaries and author notes are in the body of the text.)

There are some grammatical weirdnesses I could chalk up to typos, but then the comments are from guests, typically a few saying stuff like “Wow what a great story, I was captivated from start to finish*” and a reply from the author like “thank you. I appreciate it. Cheers.”

*Start to finish? Bruh this fic is less than 500 words, it could fit on the back of a candy wrapper

Then there’s typically at least one comment from a guest like “WҢy ́Аŕe ́yoÛ úsińg ́(NóvҼĺ|́Åi)?́ ́ṔĺéàśË d́on't́ ́ćhҼáҬ ́Ѱíth́ ́(́Nóvél|́Aí)!” (In plain text: “Why are you using Novel AI? Please don’t cheat with Novel AI!”) To which the author responded, “My stories are in rtf, I haven’t converted them yet. Cheers.”

I don’t know what to do, because for a minute I was so caught up in the euphoria of fic for my ship that I briefly lived in a world where AI plagiarism didn’t exist. I wanna give the author the benefit of the doubt, especially since I don’t know shit about AI, but this looks like a weird pattern to me. Plus, if it was written by AI, I don’t know what to do next! I wanna read about Paire, not P-AI-re!

If we ever develop a foolproof way to tell, AI will just evolve to make it harder again.

Comments accusing fics of being AI generated mean nothing. There's been a spate of those on fics that blatantly aren't. These fics still could be, but the comments aren't an indication either way.

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tinkerbelle05 · 1 year

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Single parent Bruce Wayne batkids being protective and (healthy) possessive over Bruce?? Batkids who have differing opinions on who Bruce should date?? Yes, yes, yes!!

I imagined that the kids are pretty used to Bruce going on dates as Brucie Wayne, to keep up the playboy persona. All of them have worried about varying degrees. Some took the time to do background checks on the person he was going out with and others decided to spy on them.

Hell, they would’ve been doing just that if Alfred hadn’t stopped them. Said something about how Bruce is an adult who can make his own decisions. They all knew the butler was lying through his teeth.

But they were all comforted by the fact that Bruce didn't have any feelings. That most likely, there would be no second dates with that person, they would fade into the faceless void that was the Gotham elite.

That assurance wrapped them up in a blanket when Bruce was out later than he was supposed to. When he came back happy and giggling rather than the usual indifference or just exhaustion.

“This is weird, right?” Duke questioned one day. They were all in the kitchen waiting for brownies that Jason was stress baking them.

“What is?” Jason asked-mumbled as he was setting the timer.

There was a definite tension in the air around them. For a full house of people, it was quiet. Just the sound of mindlessly scrolling on the phone and Jason’s baking filled it. The silence lingered either way.

“That we have this protectiveness of Bruce,” he explained. “Like he goes out for a ‘date’ and look at us. All nervous and fidgety. I mean, it’s been an hour and no arguments between Tim and Dami.”

No one had an answer for that. It was one of those that were complicated and simple all at once. Bruce was a person with feelings even though he tries to hide them, they are present. They exist. And he breaks, easy and often. And shouldn’t that be reason enough? Because he’s a person who has so much love to give but has been burned too many times.

But continues to love either way.

“Because he’s our dad and no one’s ever gonna be good enough for him, duh.” Jason answers, unfiltered and blunt. He was the most vocal in opposition to these dates in the first place, or Bruce going on dates in general.

“But it's all fake though? We all know that for him it might as well be another business meeting.”

Jason opened his mouth to respond when Bruce walked in, and as usual he was bombarded with a million questions. Duke’s question was forgotten by all of them.

“Where did you go?”

“What did you do?”

“Who was it?”

“How was it?”

“Guys, guys, calm down,” Bruce chuckles, “I just got into the house. Let me settle in first.” There was a faint redness of his cheeks, a glint in his eyes.

That only suggest trouble.

“And also, my date isn’t the type of person you guys are thinking of,” he starts off, walking towards the den. His kids follow him like little ducklings following their mother. “It was Harvey Dent “

“The fucking D.A?! Two Face??” Jason yells, alarmed. Harvey Dent wasn't the type to have fake dates with people.

“It was a real date,” Bruce admits to them. He gets comfortable on the couch and all of his kids surround him, preparing to latch on to every word. “Only Alfred knew about it because we know how you kids can get. I really like him, and I know that you have your suspicions, especially about him. So, please?”

“No!” Jason said, a frown on his face and his arms crossed. “I don’t like him, I don’t trust him, and he isn’t good enough.”

“Jay-“

“I agree with Todd, Father,” Damian cuts in. “My mother is a more suitable choice if we’re being honest.”

“Eh, if we are actually being honest, it’d be Superman.”

“Superman?!” Jason questions with disgust written all over his face. “Dickface, I know you have some hero worship going on with him, but that's the most basic of basic.”

“Plus, it’d be weird if I was dating my Dad’s boyfriend’s son,” Tim added.

“For once, Drake is correct. Neither Dent nor the alien is the correct choice for Father. Like I-”

“No, little brother,” Cass said.

“Yea, I agree with Cass here, Dames. I just don't see it working out with those two,” Duke agreed.

The argument continued well into the night and in true Wayne fashion, it in a debate style with well-thought powerpoints and some insults thrown in of course. No one had any agreement on who deserved their father.

“Um, do I get to make a decision on this?” Bruce asked in the middle of a laughing fit. It was nice to have the house full with people and laughter.

All of them looked at him with a blank stare and responded with a swift “No”.

#bruce wayne #jason todd #batfam #dick grayson #dc comics #soft bruce wayne #cassandra wayne #duke thomas #tim drake #bruharvey #damian wayne #single parent bruce wayne #batman fluff #batman #batfamily

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oldhalloweentape · 5 months

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🪨Venture (OW II) x (gn) reader ⛏️

(Witch Reader Edition!)

(Picture’s not mine!)

(Request here! Here’s what I promised! My friend @goohts suggested this song! Hope you all like it :)))

- This is another dynamic I like! And as always Venture is enamored with both you and who you are as a person.

- Though I don’t think they’d know much about witches or that kind of culture up until you guys met.

- To impress you, they began studying!

- They take the time to learn the significance of things like crystals, herbs, flowers, sigils, things of that sort because they know how important it is to you and your identity.

- When I say they studied, I mean they studied, asks for pointers in finding written material and actively voices their questions to you. Reading from a book or an article is useful and all but they’d also like hearing it from you.

- That and hearing it from someone with experience gives them more insight, being an auditory learner.

- Let me be honest with you, they absolutely adore the fact that you hold a connection to crystals and stones, albeit a different kind of connection.

- If they can, I can see them getting you certain crystals, tells you all about the reason behind the special formations in each one all the while cooing at them like they’re baby kittens.

- Let’s you read one of their palms while their other hand is holding a book about palm readings, turns into a game of whether or not they can ascertain the meaning behind a certain line in their palm.

- Their hands are naturally rough due to their job, nail polish that gets chipped fairly easy, the works.

- And their hand is all nice and warm so, that’s another plus.

- Can and will get you anything you need, they just really want to be helpful and supportive of you.

- Though, some times they accidentally mess with your stuff. For example, if you have moon water— Put that in hiding or something cause they’d probably drink it in the middle of the night during one of their soul crushing all nighters.

- Doesn’t realize it was weird that it was in a mason jar until it was too late.

- The apologies were endless afterwards, saying stuff like, “I’m so sorry!!”, “Mi vida, don’t be mad!”, and “Please forgive me!!”

- The type to grab certain flowers they find while hiking and gifting them to you if they have any particular significance. Comes with a bunch of while flowers they assorted themselves into a bouquet, roots and chunks of dirt still attached to them as they give you a charming little smile.

- Brags of course, though they brag about you with everything whenever they can.

- Thinks you’re so cool in general, which is a given when it comes to Venture but I digress.

- Probably tries to get you to curse Mauga or something because he was being an ass, childish as fuck but we love them for that.

- Brags of course, though they brag about you whenever they can.

- They just really mean well and it’s cute to see, they love their witch partner <3.

(Hope this was up to your guys’s expectations!)

#overwatch x reader #venture overwatch #venture x reader #overwatch 2 #venture ow2

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depravitycentral · 1 year

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Yandere Machi Komacine General Profile

Yandere! Machi Komacine x fem! reader

Tw: kidnapping, stalking, violence, decapitation, murder, slight infantilization/Machi thinks you're incapable but it's more frustrating than creepy, Machi has some emotional issues processing and she can't regulate her feelings well, mentions of assault, mentions of non-con, Chrollo plays a major role in your kidnapping because he's a nasty man, threats, explicit depictions of torture, fem reader, MDNI

I do not condone any of the actions described in this post - this is fiction and should be treated as such. If you or a loved one is in a similar situation to anything contained in this post or my blog in general, please seek help. You're in charge of your internet consumption; please make responsible choices. With that, enjoy!

WC: 10K

Shy

In general, Machi likes the idea of being a protector.

There’s something endearing about the idea of having a sweet little thing to call her own and to keep hers, and having a darling who isn’t as prone to interacting with others is ideal for her. It helps quell her possessiveness, acting as an additional comfort to know that they don’t willingly start interactions with most people.

Plus, this is helpful for her, specifically, because it means that her darling won’t be constantly trying to talk to her.

It’s not that Machi doesn’t want to speak with them – she does, desperately – but rather that it’s so difficult for her to be vulnerable that a darling that isn’t excessively talkative to strangers helps bar her from saying something embarrassing or weird or scary.

It helps calm her nerves, knowing that her darling is more withdrawn and struggles to effectively communicate with strangers, and in a lot of ways it makes Machi’s heart warm.

Because in some ways, they’re similar – Machi isn’t shy, per se, but she’s not the most talkative, and a darling who shares this trait is adorable to her, someone she wants to wrap up in her arms and keep protected from the world.

(And keep the world from seeing them, of course, but that doesn’t sound quite as poetic or romantic.)

She just likes the idea of a shier darling, not only because their easily flustered state in social situations is endearing, but also because it makes her job much, much easier.

Optimistic

In a lot of ways, Machi wants someone who is the opposite of her.

She needs someone who is soft, warm, fuzzy, and – above all else – not nearly as pessimistic as her.

Machi has good reason to be so negative – a tumultuous childhood coupled with a life of crime hardens a person and makes them expect the worst case scenario, but even she can admit that there��s something endearing about a darling who sees the world with rose colored glasses.

It’s refreshing, something she’s utterly unfamiliar with given her lifestyle and companions, but it’s sweet in a way.

Perhaps a bit naïve of them – something that makes Machi silently scold them for – but cute nonetheless.

It’s like her darling is a ray of sunshine, one she desperately needs to keep her from falling into a void of negative thoughts, death, and theft.

And really, it’s this trait above all else that prompts her infatuation to form – her darling is just so damn positive, always trying to make the best of situations, even to a degree of irritation.

It makes Machi want to throttle them, anger growing in her veins because they need to be more realistic about others’ intentions, if only for their own safety.

But it also makes her want to envelope them in the tightest hug, keeping them firmly against her chest and hearing their soft breaths and warm voice, her skin prickling pleasantly because it feels so good to have someone so happy in her arms.

It makes her happy, too – no easy feat.

Homebody

Similarly to her ideal darling being shy, Machi really likes the idea of a darling who isn’t constantly out on the town.

She has no inherent issues with women who like to club or party or even frequently go out for a meal or drinks with friends, but for her darling, a homebody is preferable.

It’s simply a matter of Machi feeling confident that her darling is being safe – if they’re at home, the chances of them being assaulted or killed or mugged is significantly lower, and it helps quell the constant paranoia that eats at her regarding her darling’s wellbeing.

It means they’ll probably be wrapped up in a warm blanket with their phone perched in their hands, or the TV on, or a good book holding their attention rather than meeting someone, potentially speaking with them, dancing with them, or – god forbid – touching them.

(It hurts her deeply to imagine someone touching her darling, of course, but there’s something worse about the idea of her darling touching someone else – a sense of foreboding and anger over their safety, of course, but also a sense of rejection, a feeling of deep-seated and buried insecurity washing over her.)

And this just makes life easier once she eventually steals them away; it’s much easier to mitigate any sort of escape attempt or desire to return to the outside world if her darling is naturally not especially eager to be in crowded spaces.

Besides, Machi doesn’t mind the idea of spending time at home with them – give her time, but eventually she’ll be more than happy to sit beside them on the couch, a few inches of space between her body and her darling’s, enjoying the quiet atmosphere and the feeling of simply being together.

It’s cheesy and cliché and she knows it, but she doesn’t care – her darling turns her into a sap anyways, so what’s another addition to that sentiment?

Capable

Of course, as Machi’s darling, you’d never, ever have to worry about any sort of personal care.

She’ll do absolutely everything for her beloved; she’s already got their favorite foods stocked in the cabinets (but only the healthier ones – her darling can’t be having too much sugar or salt, no matter how much they like it), enough menstrual supplies to last the rest of her darling’s life, and more blankets and fans than imaginable to keep her darling at a comfortable temperature and not overheat or freeze.

She likes the idea of taking care of her darling, and while they’ll never be able to escape this aspect of being the object of her affections, Machi does like the idea that her darling is somewhat able to take care of themselves.

She likes the idea that they aren’t utterly incapable, that they’re able to do the bare minimum to make sure they stay healthy and in reasonably good physical health, with minimal scratches and injuries marring their pretty skin.

It calms her slightly when she’s still initially just stalking them, her worries and anxieties calming slightly every time she sees them drinking water or stepping into the shower.

It just makes her feel good, and while she’ll still oversee all their care once they’re under her captivity, it almost makes a small swell of pride bloom in her chest because yes, they know how to take care of themselves, and yes, that’s wildly attractive to her.

A capable darling is her ideal – and likely a major part of what attracts her to her darling in the first place.

GENERAL YANDERE TRAITS:

Distant

In general, Machi has an incredibly difficult time being vulnerable.

She’s grown up under the impression that to show any sort of love or softness is a weakness, something that can be exploited and will ultimately be her downfall. It’s led to her being closed off, holding her emotions so close to her chest that sometimes she doesn’t even realize what she’s feeling, becoming so blinded by the need to hide her emotions that they almost disappear.

And where romance is concerned is certainly no different – though, there’s certainly no way to mistake or miss the emotions you spark within her, coming up and rising up the back of her throat and demanding her attention all the fucking time.

She’s completely floored by how intensely you make her feel, how fast her heart races around you, how her palms grow sweaty and her nen spikes ever so slightly in your presence, and to be honest Machi hates it at first. She hates how weak you make her feel, how her every sense is heightened the second you walk into a room, and while she knows it’s stupid to blame you for the way her body just seems to react to you, she can’t help it.

She’s never been the best at displaying emotion or really even reconciling how she feels at any given moment, and for a long time she pushes off her feelings for you, playing them off as nothing more than a passing interest, a few ‘she’s cute and that’s it’s being pounded into her mind.

(All the while she tries to ignore the way she wants nothing more than to make you laugh and smile, to see your eyes light up and hear that lovely chiming voice you have directed solely at her.)

(The whole time she’s trying to pretend like her eyes don’t automatically wander to you, focusing in on your hair, face, figure, and oh, when you wear that certain top with the low neckline… It’s embarrassing how strongly such a simple article of clothing can affect her, and it’ll often make her huff and desperately try to stop staring, glaring at anyone nearby just as a distraction from her racing heart and pink cheeks.)

And even once she eventually realizes that repressing those urges and emotions for you only make them stronger, she does no better at letting herself really succumb to them – she’s fighting tooth and nail, terrified of the way you make her feel, of the depth and intensity of the feelings that you give her without you even trying.

She’s honestly afraid of herself in moments where her desire for you grows stronger – every part of herself seems foreign once you step into the picture, even her most basic emotional responses to things like blankets (would you like this blanket? It’s soft, and she knows you like the color – you’d look stupid all wrapped up in it, though. Stupid. Cute. But stupid.), or even frying pans (would you let her cook for you? She’s decently talented in the kitchen, and while she’d be too embaressed to watch you eat something she herself made you, the pride that would swell in her chest makes looking at the nice, black, shiny frying pan in the store a little flustering.)

She’s afraid of her urges to care for you and protect you because you’re so fucking weak compared to her. She’s never been this nice before, this caring or genuinely invested in the wellbeing of someone outside of possibly Chrollo or a few other members of the Troupe, and the realization that hits her late one night as she’s staring aimlessly up at the ceiling (her mind running in circles around you as it so often does) startled her to her very core.

You bring out the side of Machi that she’d buried down so many years ago, that was only alive when she was very young, stupidly foolish and naively willing to hope against hope that someday she’d find someone to love, someone to be happy with and live a full, perfect life.

You make a piece of her that’s long been lost return, and once she understands that she has to face this new part of her head on, that she can’t keep turning a blind eye because it’s literally killing her to not give into the urges and feelings this new part of her is impressing, Machi is pulling back even further, trying to wade through the thick waters of her own feelings and wants.

And poor, poor you will be left to wonder why she always seems so angry, why she always seems to be glaring at you, one step away from killing you. She must hate you, you rationalize, and when you begin trying to act more colloquial and not as friendly or sweet as before, it’ll only further Machi’s confusion and the swirling of emotions brewing inside her.

It will only further her internal battle about whether it’s okay to let herself be vulnerable (as long as it’s for you, there’s a large part of Machi that thinks she could be anything and everything so long as it makes you happy), or only further her distant behavior.

It’s a miscommunication that Machi isn’t sure how to fix, and while she’ll eventually grow warmer towards you, let herself get more and more vulnerable around you, it’s a slow process – one that can only happen in the context of her being around you constantly, something that sounds simultaneously terrifying and wonderful beyond belief.

Selfless

Despite her internal wavering on whether it’s really okay to embrace the sick dependency she’s developed on you and against everything she’s ever tried to be, there is one thing that Machi is absolutely sure about.

That is, she will be making sure that you live the easiest life you possibly can.

She genuinely cares about you, and Machi is fiercely protective of the very few that she holds near and dear to her heart – and you, being the one who very much holds her heart, become the apple of her eye, her main focus in her day-to-day life outside of Troupe work.

She knows that as a member of the Troupe, she’s putting you in danger simply by existing in your presence, and with her feelings towards you being so strong, so painfully obvious?

Well, it’s a worry constantly eating at the back of her mind that someday you’ll be used against her, that you’ll be leverage or that someone will hurt you (or, god forbid kill you) just to get back at her and the rest of the organization.

There’s a constant sense of paranoia Machi feels when she thinks about all of the horrible, unforgiveable acts she’s committed, because while her conscience doesn’t harbor any guilt, she does harbor guilt towards you, because she’s now made you a target. She’s effectively placed a bulls eye on your back, and while it may be difficult for everyday strangers to tell that Machi harbors feelings for you, those committed to the downfall of the organization will be able to tell.

(Her longing looks and the way her nen gets a bit unpredictable around you are dead giveaways – you don’t notice, bless sweet little you, but the Hunter that’s been trailing the Troupe’s activities for the last few months will. And despite all the moral high ground the Hunters seem to tout about having, Machi knows for a fact that your death would be a welcome sacrifice in order to hurt the Spider.)

She’s painfully aware of all your flaws in terms of defending yourself in the position she’s placed you in, and the thought honest to god terrifies Machi. The guilt at knowing you’re constantly in danger because of her is almost too much to bear, and the only way she can help alleviate some of it is by becoming your guardian angel of sorts.

(It’s ironic, truly, and it’s something that she would rather die than admit, but despite her criminal status she’s actually a good force for you – at least, she hopes so.)

She does a lot for you behind your back.

Some are large favors, things that take up a decent amount of her time and effort, but she doesn’t mind because it’s for you.

(That group of men who’d been eyeing you up on your walk home from the subway station? Well, they aren’t exactly smart, are they, when they so blindly and naively follow Machi into a dark alleyway, their leering gazes and hands poised to grope making their deaths a much slower and more painful process than she’d normally bother with. After all, she knows exactly what they were planning on doing; the crude whistling and licking of their lips not hiding their intentions especially well. And although she’d never touch you without your eager consent – and perhaps not even then – she’s well aware of their intentions because she wants to touch you and fuck that cute cunt of yours, too.)

Some are smaller favors, things that aren’t too big of a deal but make Machi feel better about endangering your life, because at least she’s trying to better it, too.

(It takes hardly any time or effort at all to slip a vitamin or two into your drinks or food, just because she’s noticed you’ve looked a bit more tired these last few days, that there’s bags starting to form under your eyes, and how could she possibly live with herself if you were being neglected under her care? Besides, she knows you wouldn’t go out and buy these things for yourself – or at least not with the consistency you really should have.)

You likely won’t notice anything at first – Machi is a part of the Troupe for a reason, and though she doesn’t possess Shizuku’s abilities, she’s most definitely able to not leave a trace. So by the time you start noticing how there seems to be a steady supply of vegetables in your refrigerator that you don’t remember buying (only your favorites, of course), or when your bottles of shampoo and conditioner never seem to run out, Machi will have already been at her job of making sure that you’re well taken care of for months.

She doesn’t particularly want you to know that she’s the one so diligently taking care of you, if only because she’s still so afraid of the intensity of her feelings for you, and she’s scared that if you were to know how deeply she feels for you, how much she absolutely fucking loves you, you would run for it and never step foot in her life again.

You would reject her, something that she’s never had to face in her life, and something she hopes she never will have to – especially not from you.

She doesn’t want you to have any inkling for the way that she feels for you, at least rationally.

(Internally, however, she can’t deny how wonderful it would be to have you safe and sound in a shared home with her, protected and well fed, happy and comfortable and being oh so cute while you greet her at the door, welcoming her home from work and telling her how much you love her… It’s a guilty pleasure thought, one that often hits her as she goes about getting her hands dirty all for you, and as she stares at the lifeless corpse of the man who’d made a joke that he’d ‘hit that’ in regards to you to his friends, she can’t help but smile a bit.)

You make her happy – nervous, yes, and paranoid, true, but also this warm, burrowing feeling she knows is happiness. It’s a foreign thing that she isn’t completely sure she’ll ever get used to, but fuck it all if she doesn’t want to try.

So really, isn’t it only fair that she gives you something in return for everything you give her, even if you don’t know it?

Possessive

Despite the cloudiness that rests in Machi’s mind about how exactly she feels about you, one thing she is sure about is the anger that flares up in her chest when she thinks of another person interacting with you.

There’s something about the idea that makes her jaw get tight, her teeth pushing tightly together and her shoulders getting stiff because you should not be speaking with someone else.

She loves you in her own twisted, obsessive way, but in many ways Machi finds you irritating. You’re weak, you’re naïve, and god, how can you take your own safety and health so casually?

You’re incapable, if she’s being honest, because you’re simply unaware of how truly cruel the world can be. You live in your own glass cage, under the false assumption that the glass will never crack or splinter, that nothing will ever hurt you or affect you in a negative way – and while Machi takes as many precautions to keep this fantasy alive, it doesn’t negate the fact that you’re wrong.

You think you’re safe, sure, but you really need her, don’t you? If it wasn’t for her, you’d probably be dead by now, either by some wayward criminal, a magical beast, a Hunter, an accident, a stranger with nefarious intentions, or your own stupidity.

It’s cynical and mean and frankly not true, but Machi firmly believes that the only thing standing between you and certain death is herself. And while she still doesn’t want you to be aware that she’s the one protecting you and keeping you safe and healthy, she does start to grow a bit antsy when other people enter the picture.

In her perfect world, she would simply be caring for you and taking care of you from the shadows for the rest of your lives – your silent savior, content with the knowledge that you need her, and being needed is enough for her. At least, she thinks so.

But the world isn’t perfect, and you aren’t aware of her feelings – so of course, there are people who try to take advantage of your kindness, of your beauty and charity and naivety.

And when this happens, Machi finds herself very, very upset. Jealousy roils deep within her, making her fists clench and her eye twitch and narrow. It makes her nen spike and her aura become oppressive, her rage struggling to stay under control when she sees anyone looking at you, speaking with you, or just being near you.

It’s about your safety, more than anything – she does genuinely fear that every person you interact with has bad intentions towards you, and that in itself is neither particular delusional nor particularly surprising. Surely some of them want something more than just a polite greeting from you – hell, Machi’s been pursued by more men than she can count that most definitely wanted more and weren’t afraid to force what they wanted.

But can Machi really be blamed for being possessive over you? She’s grown up with absolutely nothing to her name – scavenging for food, living in dismal conditions, dealing with very real adult issues, and surviving against terrible odds. She’s turned towards the path of power and materialistic gain, and while she doesn’t explicitly see herself as owning you, there’s a certain allure to the idea of calling you hers.

You’re her partner – her woman, hers to care for, hers to love, hers hers hers.

And so yes, it’s about your safety, and yes, it’s understandable why she would grow attached to you in response to her origins, but there’s also a small part of her that grows horribly jealous every time someone interacts with you because it’s them, not her.

How come they have the confidence to speak with you, but she doesn’t?

(Of course, she’s interacted with you a few times before – back when her obsession had taken root, the very interactions that led her to her current state – but it’s different when it’s purposeful interaction, when she’s looking at you and your attention is on her. Why is it so hard to speak to you? Why do you make her so nervous, her fingers not visibly shaking but still having the same affect? Why do her words always sound harsh, demanding, blunt when she’s speaking with you, not a hint of the warmth or longing she feels for you? Why do you always seem to jump a bit and sheepishly nod at her commands, looking terrified and anxious and scared? Why can’t she just talk to you like normal, dammit?

How come they can so casually get you to laugh, but she can’t?

(She’s never been funny, even when she’s not feeling like her tongue is swelled up and her heart is on fire. She tries so hard to keep her cool around you and not give away anything about how she’s feeling for you, and that doesn’t exactly translate into being funny. And yet, she does find herself wishing that she’d thought of the joke the stranger on the bus had told you about the weather this morning, because while it was stupid and you’d only laughed a polite amount, why won’t you do that for her?)

How come they can so easily and organically reach out to brush your cheek or tap your arm, but she can’t?

(She’s petrified of touching you, despite wanting to so badly, and the most you’ll get from her for a long, long time is just quick, phantom touches of her fingers against your clothed back when you’re busy doing something, her skin barely even brushing the fabric of your shirt. It’s just too hard, too scary to let herself be in a position where you could reject something as intimate and loving as a touch – it leaves her too vulnerable, so what does she do? Repress it.)

It's a certain amount of insecurity that fuels her possessiveness, which simultaneously frustrates and scares her. She’s never been unconfident – she can kill dozens of fully grown men in mere seconds, can heal impossible wounds, and is an integral member of an elite criminal organization.

But you – you make her insecure. And it’s stupid and makes her scoff and cross her arms, but she can’t deny it. Despite her numerous, numerous attempts.

So really, Machi’s possessiveness is not to be overlooked – whether it’s paranoia, greed, or insecurity fueling it, it can have disastrous consequences. She will kill those she feels threatened by, and she does not care if that person holds value to you.

She’s your guardian angel, sure, but some angels fall – whether from heaven or for you is arbitrary.

DEALING WITH RIVALS:

Her jealousy is nothing to sneeze at, despite the fact that she isn’t as obvious and in your face as some of her fellow Troupemates.

She won’t yell and punch like Phinks, nor will she threaten and coddle like Nobunaga. Rather, she’ll let her jealousy simmer, slowly growing stronger and stronger, making her feel hotter and hotter until she explodes, unable to take another second of you being looked at by another person.

And so while Machi generally is of the mindset of ‘if it doesn’t involve me, then I don’t care’, where you’re concerned her entire philosophy is uprooted, if only because she absolutely believes that everything involving you involves her as well.

It’s her duty as your protector, as your loving partner – even if you aren’t aware – and she intends to hold up her end of the deal, to make sure that no one and nothing can ever touch you or harm you.

And so, she takes every precaution she can to make sure that no one ever gets to chance to spark her jealousy.

She watches each and every interaction of yours that she possibly can, often trailing behind you with those sharp eyes alternating between staring at you and sizing up all the people around you to catch anyone in their tracks who may cause problems.

(Shalnark had been quite generous in giving Machi a specially designed tracker just for you, already calibrated to your minimal nen aura so that it would stay true to you no matter where you went. She’d been grateful, though the blond hadn’t let her get away without a bit of teasing about how oooh, you’ve got a crush, don’t you Machi! She’s embarrassed to admit that she very faintly blushed at his words, swatting him down with a roll of her eyes and hissed fuck off, but the excitement of having a way to know where you are at all times even during Troupe work outweighed the irritation coursing through her veins).

She’s using her nen threads to keep your clothing in place while you’re out and about – making sure your skirt stays put or your top stays up, anything and everything to make sure that not a sliver of skin is shown to the prying eyes of those around you.

(Of course, a small part of her wishes your skirt would flip just a bit or the top of your areola would be just barely visible, if only for her viewing pleasure, but it’s more important that the men you walk by on the street don’t see anything. Much more important.)

She just feels responsible to make sure that you don’t have any negative contact with anyone (though ideally there’d be no contact of any kind, including positive), and she takes her duties very seriously, even going so far as to spend nearly every waking moment she has outside of Troupe work a good ten feet behind you, her eyes fixed on you like prey.

And after all, isn’t that a little representative of your relationship? You, the naïve, cute little thing being stalked and followed and wanted by something bigger, stronger, more dangerous and much, much more adept at simply taking what they want.

When she spots the man chatting you up in the local park you’d been walking through as a means to clear your head, immediately her nen is spiking up, her eyes narrowing as she stays hidden behind a nearby tree and watches the two of you speak.

He’s nothing special by any counts – generic, a simple pair of shorts and a t-shirt appropriate for the hot summer weather. His face is fine, all things considered, but there’s nothing particularly special about him – you wouldn’t look twice, she’s sure.

Except, you must have looked twice, because he’s standing in front of you, that irritating, ugly smile plastered on his face that makes her own lips tug into a deep frown, her teeth clenched tightly together.

And on top of that, you don’t seem to be mad at all. In fact, she can see the smile on your own face – much, much prettier, endearing, beautiful, something that momentarily traps her focus.

She’s not sure why you’re acting so happy – what could possibly be that funny about the terrible jokes this stranger is telling you?

What could this boring, useless waste of space be to you that makes you grin like you’re the happiest woman on Earth?

(Why didn’t you look like that when she first randomly met you on the street? Was this man better?)

Machi doesn’t get it, but she knows that it’s making her more than a little upset - more than a little pissed, really, as the man takes a small step forward, beginning to close the space between the two of you.

Her eye twitches as she watches you make no move to step back, and though her heart sinks like a stone when she realizes that maybe you want him to be that close to you, she briefly shakes her head, pink hair whipping her in the face as she wills herself to concentrate, to have enough patience to wait until you’re done talking to do what her fingers are aching for.

It’s torture, simply watching this interaction play out, her whole body begging for her to move and every muscle tensing in anticipation of physically breaking up your conversation, but she wills herself to stay put, closing her eyes and taking a few deep, unsteady breaths through her nose.

Fantasies and thoughts of how she could end the man’s life flash through her mind, helping kill a bit of time.

And the second that you walk off, throwing a small smile the man’s way along with a shy little wave that Machi would give fucking anything to be aimed at her, she’s making her move.

The man smirks and tucks his hands into his pocket, looking thoroughly pleased with himself as Machi murmurs curses under her breath, promises of death and words of hate tumbling past her lips as she tracks the man down past a bundle of trees on the opposite side of the park, well hidden from the view of the other patrons and – most importantly – yourself.

Once the man steps into the little forest and leans against a tree, she’s springing into action, her movements so quick that even she herself is shocked.

She charges at the man and has him tied up in less than three seconds flat, her hand placed firmly over the man’s mouth with a glare harsh enough to paralyze directed right into his brown eyes. Her aura’s crushing, the man’s body physically pushed against the tree hard enough to leave a slight dent in the bark.

His whimpers of pain make something in her gut twist pleasantly.

You’re disgusting, she growls, threads tightening more and more as she lets her anger begin to consume her.

Flashes of the way you’d smiled and laughed at the man come rushing through her mind, fueling the rage and hurt simmering in her chest.

Disgusting, worthless, don’t you know that some girls don’t want you? Couldn’t you see that she’s too fucking perfect for someone like you?

She knows she’s probably talking more than she should, more than this man deserves, but there’s something about the look of pure terror in the man’s eyes and the way he struggles against her threads that makes the blood rush to her head.

When he doesn’t respond, only wiggling harder and harder, Machi only clicks her tongue and, with a flick of her wrist, tightens the thread around the man’s neck enough that it slices it clean off.

The dull thump of his head landing on the ground next to her has her wiping her hands against her tunic in irritation, a small amount of his blood having sprayed onto her pale fingers, but she can’t deny the satisfaction of seeing the man who was so openly flirting with you dead and bloody now – just as he should be, for ever thinking he’d have a chance at getting at you while Machi’s around.

She gives a firm kick to the man’s groin, now slumped down onto the ground alongside the rest of his decapitated body, before spitting onto it.

And so, after shooting a quick text to Shizuku to ask her to come clean up a body (Shizuku’s response of why would I do that? had the pink haired girl rolling her eyes), Machi makes quick work of locating you via the tracker, making sure to follow you home and ensure that no other creeps try anything with you, lest they meet the fate of Machi and Blinky.

Chrollo can scold her all he wants for the body she leaves behind – it’s worth it, the satisfaction simmering in her veins making her feet carry herself faster and faster, the tracker slowly beeping faster as she gets closer to you.

TAKING HER DARLING AWAY:

In most regards, Machi values the idea of you being your own, semi-independent person.

She does a whole hell of a lot for you in the shadows, but she isn’t particularly fixated on stealing you away or kidnapping you. Part of the reason why she fell for you in the first place was because of who you are, and there’s a worry eating at the back of her mind that if she were to force you into a relationship or take you away from your life, you would no longer be the person she’s come to love, the person she’s come to live solely for.

It’s scary, the concept that you could just be gone, that her selfishness could be the reason why the glimmer in your eyes fades, or why you no longer smile and laugh so hard you snort a bit.

So while the idea of stealing you away and making sure that you’re constantly protected, safe from the outside world and the horrible people inhabiting it (people like her and the Troupe, she’ll admit) is appealing, she won’t ever make a move to imprison you with her unless an outside force comes into play.

She’s just too nervous and hesitant, because although what she currently has now with you isn’t ideal (the fact that you aren’t under her constant supervision or just within reach to touch – if she ever got brave enough to do so, that is – is certainly not her dream), it’d be even less ideal to have you a shell of your former self.

And those outside forces rally could be just about anything – if it threatens you in some way, she’ll begrudgingly decide that stealing you away is the only possible option.

For example, if someone were to figure out her connection to you; she’s worked tirelessly to make sure that any trace of her obsession with her and her feelings is invisible, to the point where not even anyone in the Troupe is aware of your identity.

(Some, like Shizuku and Shalnark, are aware that there’s someone that’s got Machi all up in knots, that she’s willing killing for and wants to keep constant surveillance on. Otherwise, Machi wouldn’t have just asked Shalnark about the best quality cameras that can be easily concealed available on the market – and she’d been blushing, even, a very light pink on her cheeks that made him stare for a moment, gaping like a fish because who the hell could you possibly be to affect Machi so much? Shizuku, for her part, just knows there’s something a little different about her fellow member – Machi’s smiling more, and while Shizuku is forgetful, she remembers the little things about her friend – and when she’d brought it up Machi, she’d only huffed and firmly told Shizuku to be quiet, her voice still snippy but just slightly wobbling.)

There’s a few cracks in her careful hiding of you, but for the most part Machi is frighteningly good at making sure that no one will ever know about you.

But the impossible has a way of happening, and if by some stroke of ill luck someone does find out about you and tries to attack you, torture you, kill you or use you for leverage?

The moment that she gets you back, safe from the threat of death, immediately she’s putting you under her care, locking you up tight in a small home in a small town where you’ll be utterly, completely safe.

However, the more likely scenario of an outside factor forcing her hand is that Machi will be approached by Chrollo himself – his words are simple, an are you alright? You seem to be a bit off your game, Machi. Whatever it is, please don’t let your duties to the Spider slide.

And when Machi takes a deep breath, she can’t help herself from spilling it all to her boss – the words come out fast, splutters of her feelings for you and how she can’t get you off her mind, how the constant worry over your safety eats away at her every moment she’s away from you, but Chrollo listens diligently, nodding every once in a while.

And when she finishes, her breathing slightly ragged, he can only place a comforting hand on her shoulder, asking her if she’s considered keeping you in a secure location, in which you’ll always have the comfort of knowing she’s alright?

And while she had in fact considered – and immediately discarded – the idea, something in that moment clicks; her life is dedicated to the Troupe, and maybe it really would make things easier to keep you locked up, to keep you safe and sound and completely protected.

Chrollo’s words are enough to have her agreeing, slipping into your room late one night and gently hitting a pressure point, only to leave you snuggled up in your new bed in a collection of the warmest, newest blankets that she could find.

You’re so cute, and while there’s a small amount of guilt eating away at her, Machi can’t deny how right it feels to have you completely aware of how dependent you are on her. Just as it should be.

As a captor, Machi’s air of distance and emotional invulnerability doesn’t simply disappear. Habits can’t be unlearned that quickly, after all, and while every glance at you leaves her stomach feeling weightless and her heart hammering in her chest, she’s too overwhelmed to really be able to talk to you normally – much less touch you as a means of expressing what she’s feeling.

She’s still so used to not really expressing herself, and while you’re quite literally in front of her, looking as precious and pretty and sweet as you always do, she can’t quite find it in her to openly admit how deeply the love swirling in her chest for you runs.

The possibility of you rejecting her is something that scares her to her core, and while the idea of you lovingly hugging her, kissing her and telling her in that flustered, sweet voice that you love her is something that actually makes her blush, the anxiety that you won’t return her feelings eats away at her.

There’s a constant war happening in her mind, really – she’ll dream about holding you at night, her eyes flicking under her eyelids as she imagines how warm you’d be, how good it would feel to press a kiss against the crown of your head, your hair tickling her lips as she whispers an I love you, only to wake up and immediately scoot away from you on the bed, hopeful that you hadn’t awoken during the night and seen the way she’d crawled in beside you.

She’s still distant and impossible to read, and for a good portion of your time under her care, you’ll have absolutely no idea why she’s stolen you.

She obviously doesn’t want to hurt you – she’s threatened you once or twice, sure, but never once has she actually laid a hand on you with violent intent.

(The threats even seem to be accidental, really – as soon as the words slip from her mouth, her eyes widen almost imperceptibly, as if she’s shocked by what she’s said. She’ll always be a little skittish afterwards, avoiding you more than normal and struggling to maintain eye contact, but you’ll always end up with a small, token gift by your nightstand that makes you wonder just how much she seems to know about what you like and dislike – the gifts may be unnerving, but they’re always things you love. Even if you don’t recall having mentioned it to her.)

She doesn’t want to hurt you, and you’ve pretty much ruled out the possibility that you’re being held as a hostage with some larger goal in mind.

After all, why would she bother to make sure you’re comfortable and taken care of if she was just planning on using you?

Why would she invest in buying such high quality sheets for your bed (your preferred blend/texture, of course), or such nice clothing for you?

(It’s all in shades of dark reds and pinks, a mixture of loungewear that fits you perfectly, and a frilly, lace nightgown that only comes down to the mid-thigh and makes you look positively angelic – if it weren’t for the way the sheer fabric does nothing to mask your nipples or the curve of your ass. Don’t ask Machi about the nightgown – she’d stolen it late one night, back when her obsession with you was in full throttle and she was constantly wanting, not quite having you kidnapped yet but still needing to be around you more and more. It was a split second decision, and a part of her hoped you wouldn’t even find the thing in your closet – but the moment she sees you for the first time, that thought disappears and she’s only left with the wonderful, explicit image of you standing in it, her eyes examining every inch of your body.)

You’ve considered everything from a ransom to becoming a future murder statistic, and yet nothing quite seems to fit the situation.

Because Machi’s not affectionate, either – in fact, she hardly ever touches you unless she absolutely has to.

When she’s patching you up after you fall and scrape your knee on the edge of the chair, her fingers almost recoil the moment your skin and hers meet. She avoids any hand you reach out with to grab at her wrist or tap her shoulder, jumping nearly out of her skin and whipping around to face you, this look crossing her face that seems like anger and yearning. It’s confusing, and after a while you’ll stop trying to initiate any form of physical contact, and Machi notices.

It frustrates her, this nagging feeling in her chest begging her to do something, to just reach out and place her hand on your shoulder or wipe away a few crumbs of food from your lips when you’re eating (she made the food, of course, after having watched you cook yourself dinner countless times through your kitchen window).

She won’t do it though, too embarrassed and scared you’ll reject her – so you’ll be left to wonder exactly what the hell her goal is. She doesn’t want to hurt or kill you, and she doesn’t seem to want to assault you or use your body either – what does she want?

You won’t know for a very, very long time – potentially even years, if Machi is left to her own devices. She’s just too scared to come clean; the chance of your rejection or your disgust makes her anxious in a way that has her picking at her nails and pulling out pieces of hair, the anxiety of it all just too much. But as time passes, things will get better.

She’ll slowly – very slowly – begin coming out of her shell, letting herself stand just a hair closer to you or let her gaze linger on your for just a moment longer than before. Eventually she’ll get to the point where she’ll sit directly next to you on the couch, your thighs pressing against each other’s and both of your faces looking straight ahead, both of you unwilling to broach the subject of exactly what’s happening. (Machi’s too nervous, and you’re too confused.)

It’ll take her a long time to admit that she cares about you, but she expresses that sentiment in different ways – she’s a woman of action, and you can tell that she holds just a sliver of fondness for you from the way she provides for you.

Instead of sleeping on a cement floor in some dark, wet, cold basement, she’s outfitted a modest, simple room for you, with a nice twin bed in the corner and a fully stocked closet, along with some art supplies to keep you entertained and a few others items corresponding to your hobbies.

Instead of restricting your meals or feeding you expired, questionable food, she’s always arriving at your doorway with a steaming bowl of soup (she didn’t make it – she can’t cook, but she did personally pick it out from the takeout place or pick it up at the store), her eyes meeting yours for a brief moment before they flick away.

Instead of invading every inch of your privacy like you’d expected, she’s respectful when you have to change (turning away, though the throbbing that forms between her legs begs her to turn around because you’re five feet away from her and you’re naked and fuck fuck fuck -).

She won’t force you into any kind of affection (no unwanted kissing or sexual touching, not even any comments about how attractive you are or how much she desires your body (because the thoughts are there, oh yes, and it’s difficult to keep them at bay, but she tries her best).

She’s even able to predict what you want before you know you want it – she’s spent so long stalking you and paying attention to every small habit in your daily life that she knows exactly how much body wash you lather yourself with in the shower, or how heavy your menstrual flow is, or even

PUNISHMENTS:

Doesn’t like seeing you in pain, and generally you’ll be too afraid to act up because she’s so cold and distant most of the time. She also has no problem intimidating you, whether it be by having a conversation with Feitan in the same room and playing up hearing him talk about new torture methods, even though she hates putting scary ideas into your head (she would never let Feitan touch you or anyone hurt you, but she figures that if you’re scared or have the idea that you will be hurt if you try anything, you’ll probably behave)

Generally speaking, Machi honestly does not enjoy causing you any sort of discomfort or harm.

She’s overbearingly protective, anxious at just the slightest fraction of a possibility that something could hurt you (the amount of times she’s jumped into action and harshly snatched the semi-sharp pencil you were using out of your hands has told you exactly how deeply her paranoia regarding your safety really runs), and she doesn’t have a moral compass that allows her to genuinely believe that any harm she does to you is somehow different than the danger she’s always trying to protect you from.

She doesn’t see herself as being a disciplining force; rather, Machi more wants to keep you safe and pristine, and though she knows it’s a bit of an impossibility, at least towards the beginning of your captivity, she wants you to be as happy as possible as well – she didn’t kidnap you just for the hell of it, and she didn’t uproot your whole life just for shits and giggles.

She wants you to behave, to be safe and sound and still enjoying what little life you have in her clutches, and frankly, punishing you is something that probably won’t happen too often. Machi is scary as a captor at first, if only because she’s just so cryptic, so unwilling to admit to anything regarding her feelings or obsession with you that could be used against her, your smarts coming in to play to manipulate her into letting you go or allowing you to be hurt.

She’s terrifying, cold, calculated and incredibly impersonal, so while the urge to try and escape, to fight her, to do anything to stand up for yourself is incredibly strong, you’ll likely be extremely hesitant to do so.

Because really, while she tries not to show any blood in front of you or explicitly talk about her job, you’ll be able to see the signs – she’s not the best at washing the blood off of her shirt before she returns home from particularly difficult or gruesome jobs, nor is she good at keeping the irritated mumblings under breath about Shalnark being so damn happy, he kills like it’s candy especially quiet.

She’s not subtle, so don’t act out – because while she knows that she’ll never, ever hurt you, you don’t, and do you really want to test that?

When she changes in front of you (something that takes her a while to have the confidence to do, if only because the idea of you seeing something as vulnerable as her body makes her flush lightly and avert her eyes), the spider tattoo is glaringly obvious, and you’ll be left to face the reality – there’s absolutely nothing you can do to her to get her to leave you alone, and there’s nothing you can do against her in order to leave.

So if you’re stuck, why make the situation any more of a living hell than it already is?

That being said, you are only human – Machi works so damn hard to keep you safe, healthy and vital, to give you as good of a life under her care as she feasibly can, and the moment that you do something to threaten that sense of safety she works so hard to upkeep?

Well, Machi may not like seeing you upset, but there’s only so much patience a mass criminal can have, only so much leniency and exceptionalism she can exercise towards you – which is why, as she sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose when you refuse to stop going near the oven (even though she makes a point to turn the breaker off and cover the oven in such a strong field of nen that there’s no way you could even try to put your hand inside), she decides that difficult situations call for unfortunate measures, that she’ll have to go to the extremes to get you complacent, pliant, behaving.

She still will never purposefully physically hurt you, if only because she genuinely can’t stomach the thought of being the cause for any of your blood to be drawn, but your mind is still oh so vulnerable, oh so exposed for her liking, pliant and susceptible to a bit of manipulation, to a bit of rerouting.

And so, while she doesn’t feel good about it, it’s not difficult to get a troupe member to come to her place, to speak about the latest or newest job, what Chrollo wants stolen, how many people can be killed or in the body count, asking them (with a well hidden wince and a sinking feeling in her gut) to be as explicit and specific as possible, to speak loudly enough that you’ll hear from the next room over.

She does this to prove to you without physical pain that she is still more than capable of shutting you down, that while she may have not done anything to you besides stealing you away, she could kill you at the drop of a pin, and you should really listen to her if you know what’s best for you.

It feels dirty and Machi honestly hates doing it, but it’s the only way – and so, when Feitan reluctantly agrees to swing by (after Machi’s promise of a few million Jenny for his trouble), Machi’s setting him up close to the wall separating the kitchen from the bedroom, asking him to face the plaster and tell him about the latest torture method he’s been experimenting with.

Feitan doesn’t like pointless talking or really helping Machi out at all, but as he begins talking, narrowing his eyes as Machi silently pumps her palm up to show he should speak louder, you’ll be sitting in the next room over, the slightly muffled words chilling you to the core.

First locate the spine, take the long knife and cut from neck to tail bone, should wait five to ten minutes for enough blood. Take oven and heat to 500 degrees…

You’ll be traumatized for all thirty minutes of the conversation, and while Machi fucking hates that she’s filling such gruesome and violent ideas in your head, it’ll get the point across, and get you listening to her again.

After she bids him goodbye (a clipped next month, see you then and a slammed door in his face), she’ll take a deep breath and adjust her ponytail lightly, closing her eyes and preparing to face you.

She’s not surprised to see you curled in on yourself on your bed, eyes wide and your fingers trembling, but it still doesn’t make her feel good, a sick feeling settling in her stomach as she bites her lip and leans against the doorframe, hurting inside knowing that she’ll never, ever let Feitan anywhere near you to enact the torture he was detailing, but knowing that she can’t tell you that.

She’s noticeably silent after every ‘punishment’, letting you stew over the information on your own time, but she’s pleased to see that you begin avoiding the oven like the plague, not a single glance spared at the appliance without copious amounts of mumbled apologies and nervously twiddling fingers.

Of course, Machi doesn’t enjoy breaking you down like this, scaring you into submission, but in her mind it’s the only way – she won’t slap you or bruise you, but don’t mental punishments work better, anyways?

Isn’t it more effective to make you afraid, so that the only thing you feel is safe and dependable is her?

OVERALL DANGER:

7/10

The thing that makes Machi so dangerous is genuinely that she’s absolutely, thoroughly and scarily committed to making absolute sure that you’re taken care of, that not a single thing can hurt you or otherwise affect you.

She’s terrified of the idea of you being hurt, because now that she has someone she actually cares about, a connection that makes her chest feel warm and her cheeks feel flush, she is absolutely not willing to let anything happen to fuck it up.

She’s paranoid, overprotective to a fault, and so painfully detached from being able to properly express herself, to properly showcase just how deeply and horribly her obsession and love for you runs.

She’s terrified of being emotionally vulnerable, of letting you in for fear that you’ll somehow use it against her, and so Machi becomes a bit like your guardian angel – only much, much bloodier, and one that will eventually lock you up and treat you like you’re made of the finest china, able to break at even the slightest poke.

Honestly, if you can deal with her being essentially emotionally unavailable (until at least a year or so into your captivity, if all goes well) and not letting you do much of anything for yourself, life with Machi won’t be so bad – you’ll get adequate, homecooked food (though it tends to a bit bland for nutritional reasons), a clean space to live in (one that she honestly won’t intrude on too much, if only because the concept of sleeping in the same bed as you makes her feel pathetic and weird for being so excited and nervous about it), and a protector who considers your safety to be the most important thing on Earth.

If you can deal with it, Machi isn’t too bad – just remember that ice takes time to melt, and can freeze up again at any moment’s notice, if you’re not careful enough.

#yandere hxh #yandere hunter x hunter #yandere machi #_hxh #_machi komacine #_lee's profiles

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