All Too Well | Rafe Cameron
A tragedy in your family forces you to return to the one place you fled from years ago. Your hometown of Outer Banks.
Warnings: NON-CON, Mom Reader, Pogue! Reader, Mentions of Abuse, Blackmail, Threats, Child Abduction, Gun Use
This is a dark story. Heed warnings before reading under the cut.
You sigh as you pass the familiar town sign. Welcome to the Outer Banks. Paradise on earth.
Right, paradise on earth. Until it became hell for you.
You let your gaze wander across the coastline, soaking in the crashing waves and glittering sand. The fresh sea breeze whisks inside the car, its soft, familiar flutter over your face bringing bittersweet memories alongside it. As you take in your surroundings, you’re struck with the realization of how little has changed over the years. Same houses. Same trees. And perhaps, you ponder wistfully, even the same people…
A mix of confusing emotion flows through you at that prospect.
Most of your life was spent here, precious memories having taken place on that very beach you just passed. Lazy days hanging out with your friends, doing whatever it is you wished. Hanging out, goofing off, getting high and enjoying endless summers.
Before mesmerizing blue eyes found yours at a beach party. It’s when your downward spiral began. How sweetly things started. How sourly they turned.
You can still feel the ghost sensation of his fingers around your neck, pressing until you could hardly breathe. Yet another fit of anger. Brushed off like so many until you couldn’t bear it anymore.
Eventually you grew tired of the whirlwind of emotions, of how he always had an excuse, some sort of twisted justification for his horrible actions. How somehow nothing was ever his fault. But yours. Always yours.
And once you found out that you had more than your own well-being to worry about…the decision was made for you. Of course, you needed to run like hell and never look back. It wasn’t just about you anymore. You had someone else to protect, from his mood swings and temper, but most importantly…from becoming just like him.
A heavy breath drops from your mouth as you clutch the steering wheel. The unpleasant flashes are chased away with a sharp shake of your head. You steady your rising pulse. You promised yourself not to not sink into that hole again. That hopeless, desolate place where you’re trapped in the dark and no one can hear you screaming. You’re stronger now. He can’t hurt you anymore.
This was four years ago. All that stuff is in the past. Buried and forgotten. Thankfully.
Your son’s hitch-pitched voice tugs your focus from the backseat.
“Can we go to the beach, mom?” he says, bouncing in excitement. “Please, please, please.”
You swipe a glimpse of him in the rearview mirror. Here he is. Your entire life, on the cusp of throwing a tantrum in the backseat of your car. Your three year-old son, Parker.
Your focus shifts back to the road.
“We have to go visit some friends first, sweetie.”
“Okay…” he pouts dejectedly.
“Once we’re settled in, we can go.”
He beams at that. A smile creeps upon your lips. While raising Parker on your own has been a challenge, you wouldn't change a thing. Seeing his bright, gummy smile everyday makes it all worth it.
You make a few more turns before finally reaching your destination. You soak in the striking sight of the house as you climb out of your car. It’s a lot bigger and nicer than the ones surrounding it, an uncanny sight in the Cut. It still surprises you that JJ didn’t move to Figure Eight. With his flourishing boat renting business, he can basically do anything he wants now. And you know he’d likely get a kick out of pissing off the
Kooks by moving to their side of the island. So you’re a bit shocked that he chose to keep roots there.
You suppose, in the end, he will always be a Pogue at heart.
You pick up your son from the back seat. A yawn escapes from his mouth before he wraps his arms around your neck and begins to doze off. You can’t blame him. This was his longest trip since he was born. He clings to you as you make your way to the front door.
The door opens, a familiar blond welcoming you with a bright smile.
“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” he drawls.
“Are you sure it’s okay if we stay? We can go to a motel.”
JJ huffs his disapproval before ushering you inside.
“Nonsense. Why stay in a motel when we have plenty of room here?”
Your eyes dart about the place. It’s clean and though the decor screams ‘bachelor’, homey vibes ooze from the space. Memorabilia from JJ’s travels are littered across the shelves as well as pictures of him and the Pogues beneath his surfing board. Melancholy hits you again. You’ve missed so much.
You shoot him a teasing grin.
“Plenty of room, huh? Sounds like someone’s gone full Kook.”
JJ rolls his eyes at your playful taunt. “Do you have any bags?” he asks.
“In the trunk,” you reply, handing him your keys. “I didn’t pack much since we won’t be staying long.”
He takes your keys, concern flashing in his blue eyes. “Which I still don’t get. I could kick his ass for you, so you don’t have to leave again.”
“It’s fine, JJ. Parker and I have a great life in Florida. I just got promoted. I’m saving up so we can move to a bigger place in a few months. Things are good. Really good.”
“I still think you should be here with us.” You supply no answer as he strolls to your car to get your things. You know JJ would tussle with him if you let him, has tried to in the past. He’s your best friend and has always been overly protective of you. It’s exactly why you need to leave once everything is handled. You refuse to let him get tangled up in your mess. It was never his to fix.
You pad further inside JJ’s home. Astonishment flutters through you as you find another familiar face by the kitchen counter.
Her long blonde mane swings at her back as she rushes to you.
“Is that my nephew?” she whispers in an attempt not to wake up your toddler.
“Sarah,” you greet cheerfully.
She bends to get a better look at him. Her expression lights up.
“He’s gotten so big since the last time.”
The sound of Sarah’s voice tears Parker from his slumber.
He rubs his eyes, a broad grin appearing on his little face when he recognizes her.
“Auntie Sarah…”
“Hey buddy,” she chimes.
He jumps into her arms and the two of them giggle as she hugs him.
“I wish I could visit more often,” she says.
You nod in agreement. Sarah used to visit the two of you in Florida on a semi-regular basis, but she had to stop once a certain somebody became a bit too curious about the impromptu trips she was taking several times a year.
“Me too, but we both know it’s not possible.”
The two of you share a knowing look.
JJ reappears with your two bags in his hands.
“Shall I show you and your offspring to your chambers, m’lady?” he says, mimicking a horrible British accent.
You shake your head at his antics. Though you’d never admit it aloud, you kind of missed them. A lot.
“You’re an idiot, you know that?”
He flashes you a broad grin.
“Hm, I think the word you’re looking for is wickedly handsome.”
“That is more than one word,” you deadpan.
He shrugs. “Just handsome then.”
You sigh as you follow him upstairs. Pleasant surprise courses through you at what you witness when he opens the door to the guest room.
The interior is warm and welcoming. The blankets have rockets, moons and stars on them. There’s even a nightlight and a few toys lying in a corner. It’s a lot more than you expected and a swell of emotions mounts inside you at the sight.
“You just had to go overboard, huh?”
His shoulders heave and fall in nonchalance.
“Only the best for my best girl.”
You plop down on the bed, drinking in the animal paintings on the walls.
“Did you paint that yourself?”
He sits next to you, leaning back in a relaxed stance.
“I did. Mostly. Though Sarah, Kie and the others insisted on helping.”
“You know we’re not staying.”
He studies you, a small smile tugging his lips.
“A guy can hope.” JJ licks his lips, fingers dragging over the colorful blanket. “I just want you to know you have a home here if you ever decide to come back.”
“I don’t know what to say.”
Blue eyes lock with yours, silence stretching between the two of you before he speaks again.
“I really missed you.”
“Me too,” you say. “Are you and Kie still…?”
“We broke it off a few years ago.”
Your eyes round. They seemed so into each other at the time. Though you surmise, people can change over the years. You aren’t teenagers anymore after all.
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m not. We’re better off as friends,” he states casually. He holds your gaze and smiles. “Some things just aren’t meant to be.”
“Alright Master Yoda, when did you get so wise?” you quip.
He joins his hands, his expression solemn.
“A stupid kid, I am not anymore.” You laugh and his smile widens. “Believe it or not.” He pauses, appearing lost in thought. He then offers, “You should come to the Bonfire celebration tonight.”
“I don’t know…”
Your brows knit. You returned out of necessity. Hanging out isn’t exactly at the top of your list of priorities.
JJ gives your shoulder a light shove.
“Come on. It’s at the Boneyard, just like old times.” His expression turns serious. “Everyone’s really missed you. It’s not the same without you around.”
He gets to his feet. Your stomach knots when he retrieves an urn from under the night table and hands it to you.
Your chest tightens.
“Are those her…”
“Yeah. Her last wish was to be at sea. Maybe you could do it tonight?”
Your fingers press firmly around the curved edges of the urn, tears welling up in your eyes.
“I should have been there, JJ,” you mumble.
“It’s not your fault.”
“But if I-”
“No, you can’t blame yourself for every little thing. I won’t let you.” Noting your trembling fingers, he takes the urn from you, placing it over the night table. He cradles your face and wipes the tears spilling down your face. “She knows how much you loved her. That's all that matters.” He wraps his arms around you and you sink into his embrace, soaking his familiar sea-salt smell. It’s somehow barely changed since you last saw him. “It was an accident. No one could have done anything. Especially not you.”
You sniffle, swallowing a fresh surge of tears. You may not have been close to your sister, but you still resent that you couldn’t be together before she passed. She barely got to know her own nephew.
She deserved a lot more from you. A lot more that you weren’t able to give, which you hate yourself for.
You just couldn’t risk it. Not when one look at him would suffice for most people to guess who Parker’s father is. Starting with those piercing blue eyes. The same as his father’s.
Accidents are accidents. But you can’t help but wonder if being with her would have made a difference. No one even really knows what happened. Just that she was in her house - you parents’ house - and fell. Then she stopped breathing. By the time she was rushed to the hospital it was too late.
Your sister was gone. Ally is gone.
A harsh truth your mind is still wrangling with.
“I don’t know if I can come. Parker’s still so small-”
“I’ll watch him.”
Your head snaps up. You find Sarah in the doorway, your son in her arms. As soon as he enters the room, the little boy gets excited. He starts running around and grabs a toy from the pile to play with.
“Are you sure?” you ask.
“Are you kidding?” Sarah exclaims. Her gaze softens as she looks at your son. “I missed the little guy so much. We’ll have a ton of fun.”
You peer at Parker. He’s found a dinosaur and a soldier and decided to have the two apparently fight in space. You have to admit, JJ’s house is much more kid-friendly than you expected. Perhaps, you can probably release him into his aunt’s care for a few hours. You have no desire to turn into one of those helicopter moms who need their children under perpetual supervision. Parker too, may benefit from some time with Sarah. He never gets to see her after all.
“Well, I guess if you don’t mind,” you say.
Sarah perks up at your response.
“See? Everything’s sorted out,” JJ says brightly.
The moment they see you, Kie, John B and Pope hurtle a ceaseless string of questions your way. Your life in Florida. Your job. Your dating life. The weather. How the beaches are there. No inquiry’s off-limits, too strange or personal. They constantly speak over each other, their excitement at seeing you again clear as day. You try to answer everything in between your laughs. JJ was right. It’s good that you came.
You needed to see them. It doesn’t hit you until you listen to Kie’s bubbly, passionate rant about the foundation she created to clean up the ocean floors. You missed the Pogues. Deeply. You were so absorbed in being a mom that you never took the time to ponder that loss.
“Guys, you have to give her time to actually answer,” Sarah jests.
“It’s okay,” you say, waving your hand in nonchalance. Your handle on the urn between your arms tightens. “There’s something I need to do anyway.”
Quiet falls over the group, their lively chatter instantly dying. You see it in the Pogues’ eyes. All your friends are acutely aware how it guts you to do this.
Kie takes a step forward. She hasn’t changed a bit. Brown curls cascade at her back. Her pretty face is scrunched in concern.
“Do you want me to come with you?”
You shake your head. This isn’t something the Pogues can help you with. You glance at JJ who stands a few feet behind her. His expression mirrors hers. You’ve used him as a crutch enough times. Too many times.
You give a tremulous smile.
“No I…I need to do it alone.”
She nods as you stroll towards the rolling waves. Your slow steps trail prints into the sand as you soak in the flaming sun spilling over the horizon. Diamonds sparkle above the mesmerizing water, lights dancing over the infinite stretch of blue.
You open the urn. Water licks your toes as you move forward.
As you watch her ashes swirl to the bottom of the ocean, a strange emptiness fills your chest. None of it feels right. She should be here laughing. Or doing something stupid with the Pogues. Doing stupid shit was her specialty.
Her sunny smile flickers in your mind.
You don’t notice the tears until their salty taste slips past your lips. You quickly wipe them as soon as you do. You can’t let Parker see you cry. He would ask why, in that sweet little voice of his. “Why are you crying, mommy?”
And you’d be stumped, incapable of producing a suitable answer for him.
“Princess?”
You freeze. The deep voice feels snatched right out of your worst nightmares. You turn slowly, denial still keeping you mute.
Your heart drops.
It really is him, you realize, dumbfounded. He looks the same as the last time you saw him, dizzyingly tall and wickedly handsome in khaki shorts and a seersucker buttondown. A very Kook getup. Not that you’d expect anything less from Rafe Cameron.
He chuckles at your reaction.
“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” His smile widens. You feel sick. He points at his chest. “Shit, am I…the ghost?”
Ignoring the rising tide of panic overflowing your insides, you brush past him.
He follows you, his long legs easily keeping up with your hasty strides.
“I was gonna offer my condolences but…Really? You don’t even say ‘hi’ anymore?”
“Hi, Rafe.”
Your stomps are halted when he stands in your path.
He bends so the two of you are at eye level. Your breath catches beneath his stare. You somehow forgot. How blue his eyes are. And something else strikes you as you look at him.
Those are your son’s eyes.
“There. Did you lose your manners in…Where do you live now anyways?” He snorts but there isn’t a hint of mirth in his tone. “It’s not like I’d know since you changed your number on me.”
Your stomach flips. “It’s good to see you, Rafe. But I was just leaving.”
When you try to get past him again, he grabs your arm to keep you from leaving.
“Wait, wait, wait. Why the cold shoulder? After all these years…this is what I get from you, princess?”
A lump forms in your throat.
“Let go of me, Rafe,” you say.
You try to shake out of his grasp but his grip on you tightens.
He gets in your face, his gaze narrowing.
“I haven’t seen you in four years. And this is how you treat me? W-What did I do to deserve that?” You turn your head, tears gathering in your eyes. His fingers latch around your jaw, digging painfully into your cheeks. “Look at me when I’m talking to you.”
Someone pulls you back from Rafe, sliding between the two of you.
You gasp as you stumble back.
“Leave her alone, Rafe,” JJ grits out, standing in front of you protectively.
A derisive snicker bursts through Rafe’s lips. He glares up and down at your friend, disdain burning in his eyes.
“Still hanging out with those Pogues, I see.” He laughs as JJ crowds his space, his jaw clenching. “You tryin’ to get into something, Maybank?”
“Maybe I am,” JJ replies.
One could cut a knife through the thick layer of tension coating the air between the two men.
You wedge yourself between them. None of them looks away from the other, a nonverbal duel still occurring right before your eyes.
You heave out a long sigh.
“Guys. We aren’t kids anymore. That’s enough,” you say. You unleash an annoyed sigh when they don’t move and grab JJ’s hand. “JJ, let’s go.”
“Still her little puppy dog, I see,” Rafe sneers. “Too bad she never gave you any treats like you wanted, huh Maybank?”
He blows JJ a mocking kiss, wiggling his fingers and openly taunting him.
Sensing his urge to pounce on Rafe when he tenses near you, you tug JJ further away.
“He’s not worth it,” you whisper.
“Good night, princess. I guess I’ll see you around,” Rafe yells from afar.
“No, you won’t,” you respond, shooting daggers at him with your eyes. “Goodbye, Rafe.”
The events of the evening leave you rattled. For the entire night, you toss and turn in bed, the sound of Rafe’s voice, even deeper after all these years, invading your every thought. You thought you were safe. Freed. But frankly, one look from him had you feeling weak. Defenseless. It yanked you right back to four years ago. Back when you still hung to his every word and thought he held the moon. When you thought that, perhaps, Rafe Cameron was just misunderstood. And you, the only one capable of solving the riddle he offered. You truly were a naive teenager then.
Guys like Rafe never change. It took you entirely too long to accept that fact. You'll never make such a mistake ever again.
In the morning, JJ leaves to run some errands, leaving you alone with Parker. You plant a kiss atop his head and stroke his blond curls. His tiny fists are curled against the pillow, his lids twitching while he lightly snores. It soothes you, the sight of him soundly sleeping. He’s innocent and happy. You would do anything to keep him that way for as long as possible.
You climb out of bed and make your way downstairs. You get started on breakfast for your son, mashing ripe bananas and oats as you follow along a tutorial online. It’s where you learnt everything when it came to caring for Parker. The internet has been a life-saver in more ways than one.
You pause your whisking when the doorbell chimes.
Your brows knit. You’re not expecting anyone. Neither is JJ. A delivery, perhaps? But he didn’t say there would be one today.
You flinch as the sound erupts again.
Your heart starts to race. Something isn’t right. You can feel it.
At first, you elect to ignore whoever’s on the other side. You’re alone with your son. You won’t let some stranger who can’t catch a hint inside the house.
But it doesn’t matter.
The bell rings again. You’re paralyzed. You take tremulous steps to the entrance. Whoever it is, you plan on telling them to kick rocks. You suck in a wide lungful and nudge the door open by a tiny crack. Your eyes fly open in shock at who’s on the doorstep.
Immediately, you try to slam the door closed. He doesn’t let you, placing his foot against the doorjamb as his large hand curls around the wooden edge of the door to keep it open. Fear seizes your throat as he looms over you.
“Rafe? What are you doing here?” you say, trying your best to quell the tremor in your voice.
He licks his lips and drinks you in.
“Well, we didn't get to finish our talk last night-”
Of course, this is the moment your son chooses to groggily drag his feet down the stairs.
“Mommy, I’m hungry…” he complains while rubbing his face.
Your heart drops to your feet.
Rafe’s eyes grow wide. For a minute, he’s too stunned to utter a word, a million thoughts seeming to go through his mind. You use his surprise to nudge him outside. He doesn’t resist, shock still written on his handsome face.
You close the door and slump against the wood.
“Who’s that?” Rafe blurts out once he finds his ability to speak again. He’s pointing at the door as his breaths grow heavier. It doesn’t matter that your son is now out of view. Some doors can never be shut again once they’ve been opened. This is one of them.
Your shoulders heave and fall in feigned nonchalance.
“Nobody.”
His jaw clenches. “Don’t fuck with me, okay?”
You nod and show him the front yard.
“Let’s talk over there.”
He won’t let it go. Just like he never did with anything when you were together. You watch him pace across the yard as he grips his head. It almost seems like you’re not here, a spiral of emotions clearly sucking him in. You stand back warily. You remember those spirals, how destructive they could turn.
“Fuck, Fuck…” he mumbles under his breath. He takes a deep breath and whirls to you. “You know what I’m gonna ask.”
You cross your arms, pulling the cardigan closer to your shivering frame.
“Rafe. I need you to calm down…”
He slaps your hand away when you try to touch his arm.
“No you…Y-You don’t get to tell me to calm down, okay? Because it’s fucked. Fucked.” You jump as he gets louder, uncaring about anyone hearing him. “How old is he? Three? Four? Is he my-”
“His father’s in Florida,” you blurt out. As soon as the words roll off your tongue, you curse inwards, your mistake dawning on you. Why did you say Florida instead of some other random state like Missouri or Massachusetts? You’re gonna have to move. Again.
Rafe’s jaw flexes before a chuckle of disbelief leaves him.
“Really? You expect me to believe this load of crap? That kid in there looks just like me.”
“It was a one-night stand.”
He squints at you.
“I know you. You don’t do one-night stands. You’re not that kind of girl.”
“Well maybe you don’t know me as well as you think. Maybe I’ve changed.”
That mere suggestion seems to have his blood boiling.
“I want a paternity test.”
Your stomach plummets.
“No.”
He gives a slow nod, a smirk blooming on his lips.
“Then I’ll court-order it, sue you for custody and make sure you never see our son again.”
A chill creeps up your spine. Your voice quakes with fear.
“You wouldn’t.”
His face breaks out into a broad grin.
“Try me, princess.”
You look at him. Really look at him. A determination is etched in his steely glare. One you haven’t seen in years. Not since he relentlessly pursued you until you yielded to his advances. It flattered you then. It terrifies you now.
“I’ll come back tomorrow,” he announces. “And don’t try to run away from me again, you understand? You won’t like what happens if you do.”
Your throat goes dry. When you don’t answer, Rafe’s hand shoots up and latches around your throat.
You whimper as he seethes, “Do you understand?”
“I-I understand, Rafe,” you stutter, your body shaking in his grasp.
He pats your cheek, seemingly satisfied.
“Good. See you tomorrow, princess.”
Even as he releases you, your chest is tight with dread.
He starts walking to his Jeep. You remain glued to your spot, feeling as if a hole just opened in the ground and you were being swallowed in its depths.
Rafe’s gaze rakes across your shuddering frame as he starts his car.
He bends over the window and smirks.
“Oh by the way, you still look good…Didn’t get to say that last night,” he tosses flirtatiously before driving away.
When night comes, JJ scowls at you while you’re frantically packing. Since he came back, he has tried to convince you to stay.
But your mind is made up. You refuse to wait for him to have the confirmation he needs to force his way into your life again. You know exactly what the test will say. There’s been no guy other than Rafe. No one before or after.
He left you so bruised, so riddled with wounds that never closed, that you never opened your heart to anyone else again. And definitely not your legs.
“You should have called me when it happened,” JJ says.
“Call you for what? So the two of you can swing on each other?”
You glance at your son, napping across the large bed. He has no idea what’s going on. No idea his father was here just a few hours ago. A silver lining amidst the dusky clouds threatening to rain hell upon your life. A life you cherish. A life you worked so hard to build.
A life you just lost. Coming back here was a mistake. You knew it from the beginning. Had that sinking feeling all along. But you were so chock full of guilt about your sister that you didn’t have it in you not to fulfill her last wish. She deserved that at least.
…And now, you’re fucked.
“This doesn’t change anything. We can’t stay.”
“But…”
You whip your head up and whisper to not wake Parker.
“It’s his kid. You know how much sway he has now. How much he could fuck up our lives. Not just mine. But everyone else’s…including you, JJ.”
Annoyance flares in his eyes. You can tell he doesn’t like to be reminded of that.
“But you don’t have to do this alone. I can-”
You clutch his arm and shake your head.
“No, I already involved you enough. If we go now, he won’t be able to find us, ever again. I’ll make sure of it.”
His frown accentuates. Unsaid words crowd the air. You feel their weight in his silence. Still, none leave his mouth. He heaves out a deep resigned breath instead.
“Just text me when you’ve crossed state lines, okay?”
“Of course. Tell Sarah and the Pogues I’m sorry. I’ll call her once Parker and I are safe.”
He wraps his arms around you. You sink into the embrace, committing that comforting warmth to memory.
“I can’t believe you’re already leaving,” he says.
You swallow the onset of tears tickling the back of your eyes.
“Yeah…Me too.”
When you’re slinking down the road in your hatchback as stars twinkle above you, you genuinely believe you are out of trouble. You didn’t even wake Parker, just lifted him from bed and gingerly placed him in the backseat. Heavy sleeper as he is, your son did not stir. You believe the two of you are safe, sound and on your way back to Florida. That for once, you bested him. All's well that ends well, as they say.
But perhaps you escaped the frying pan to jump right into a blazing inferno.
It is what occurs to you as you’re hailed by a cop car on your way out of town. The moment you get a glimpse of the sirens, the blood drains from your head. You can never catch a break, it seems. At first, you ponder if you should ignore it, keep on driving. You almost do it. But as the vehicle cuts right across your path, you’re left with no other option. Your nerves flare at the sight of the blue and red lights glaring in the pitch blackness, illuminating the large trees flanking the road.
As Officer Shoupe steps outside the car, your gut wrenches. He chased you and your friends across the island so many times when you were a teenager. You weren’t the most fond of him back then. Now you’re downright on the verge of soiling your car seat as he takes long, threatening strides towards your car.
He knocks on your window. You sigh and lower the glass. You place a hand in front of your face as he blinds you with his flashlight.
“Ma’am. Get out of the car,” he orders.
“I don’t understand. I wasn’t speeding-”
His hand ghosts over the holster of his gun. Your pulse quickens. The clear threat hangs in the night air, stifling your breath.
“I won’t say it again. Get out.”
You take shaky steps outside of the car, raising your hands the entire time. Your son’s in the backseat. You find yourself praying, hoping that he doesn’t wake up and see you like this.
Unspilled tears collect in your eyes.
As he speaks into his walkie-talkie, your heart stops.
“I’ve got her, sir. You were right. She was trying to leave.”
It doesn’t even surprise you when you see a familiar Jeep arrive on the scene some time later. Of course it was all him. Of course he anticipated you running away, again.
A surge of queasiness mounts within you as his towering frame leaps out of the drivers’ seat and he stomps in your direction. You feel the bear trap closing in on you, the claws sinking deep. Inescapable.
He opens the door where your son is having an oblivious nap and barks at you, “Get Parker and come with me.”
When you refuse to move, he seizes the back of your neck and slams your face against your car window. You squeak as the coolness of the glass seeps into your cheek.
“I said…Get him,” he hisses, pressing something cold against the base of your spine. You go still. You never had one pointed at you before but you’re fairly sure you know what object is kissing your back right now.
As the muffled metallic click of the weapon ripples through the night, a stray tear skips down your cheek.
A gun. Rafe has a fucking gun. Disbelief floods your chest.
Not even your worst nightmares could you have conjured something this sick and evil.
His lips drag along your earshell as you sob. “Get our son,” he articulates. “I won’t repeat myself, princess.” As soon as he allows you some space, you rush to pick up your son from the backseat. He’s thankfully still asleep. You adjust him in your arms as you gulp down a sob, reluctantly making your way to Rafe’s Jeep. He instructs you to put him in the backseat. He then nudges the gun against your hip, quietly heeding you to climb into the passenger seat of his car.
Your heart shrivels inside your chest as he hops into the car too and slams the door shut.
“All these years and you still haven’t learnt to listen,” he scoffs, irritation bleeding through his tone. His wrath is palpable. Sizzling, red, hot fury you feel all the way to your bones.
He hates you. Who knows what he’ll do if you provoke him any further?
Terror makes your voice slip out hoarse, hardly more than a whisper.
“W-Where are you taking us Rafe?”
The gun - the goddamn gun - is still in his hand as he pinches the bridge of his nose and slaps the steering wheel.
“I should kill you for this, you know?” he hisses, turning the key in the ignition with his other hand. The engine revs as he turns the car around. He dives onto the road. Any fickle hope you harbored dwindles into the night.
You lick your dry lips.
“Rafe,” you try again.
His eyes flare dangerously, the gun twitching in his hand.
“Don’t interrupt me when I’m speaking.” A mirthless chuckle bursts through his lips. “S-So what now? You take my son from me, for four fucking years…and I’m the bad guy? I-It’s somehow my fault?”
You swallow past the thick lump in your throat. Tears flow down your face as shaky words bounce off your tongue. “You scared me, Rafe…sometimes.” You glance at the gun and sniffle. “You’re scaring me now. Please just…p-put away the gun.”
He slams his hand into the steering wheel as you gasp.
“Don’t fucking try telling me what to do,” he warns. He draws a long inhale, squeezing his eyes shut. When he opens them again, there’s a peculiar determination burning in his gaze. “Here’s what we’re gonna do. We’re gonna drop off our son.” The corners of his lips curl upward. “Then Mommy and Daddy are gonna go home and have a little grown-up talk.”
A chill shoots through you.
“Rafe, please. Don’t do this. I’m sorry. O-Okay, I admit it. I lied. But please, don’t-”
“Shut up!” he roars, causing you to fall quiet. “You’ve lied to me enough. I don’t want to hear another word coming out of your lying whore mouth until we get home.”
The commotion nudges your son awake.
“Mommy…”
Your nerves thrum in panic. You bend over the backseat and cradle his face, slotting a false smile onto your lips. “Go back to sleep, sweetie,” you urge.
“Yes, Parker, go back to sleep,” Rafe repeats, his tone veering on sarcastic.
“Who’s that, mommy?” your toddler inquires, tilting his head.
“Just go back to sleep,” you say, singing a tremulous lullaby to lull him back into slumber. Relief sits inside your chest when his eyes close.
He makes a first stop at his friends’ house. Your heart is ripped outside your chest as you watch Rafe’s friend - Topper or something you believe his name is - take your son away. They exchange words in the dark as you gawk in horror. You only have vague memories of Topper and now he has your son. A scream scalds the back of your throat, one you’re too terrified to let loose.
When Rafe returns inside the car, he is eerily quiet. You nearly find yourself wishing he’d talk, even if it’s to yell at you again. The silence is so unlike him, so profoundly unnerving.
But not another word escapes the confines of his tight lips as he drives.
Tannyhill comes into view and your heart sinks.
The persistent threat of the gun is the only reason you follow him inside. Whenever you drag your feet, he shoves the barrel into your back even more, reminding you what you’re risking if you don’t do as he says. You’re a sobbing, weeping mess by the time you’re in the Camerons’ lobby.
He places the gun on a nearby table and removes his belt.
“So, w-what was the plan exactly? Did you plan on never telling me?” You tense as he loops the belt around his knuckles, prowling forward.
The golden ring on his finger glints in the low light of the lobby.
“Did you plan on having that Pogue raise my son?”
“I…”
A sinister smile spreads over his face.
“You know what? I think we’ve been apart too long. I think I gotta remind you who the fuck I am, princess.” Your blood curdles at his words. You dart across the lobby but Rafe catches you, hauling you off the ground before slamming your body across the marble tiles without ceremony. Pain explodes through your limbs. He drags your limp frame to the railings. Your insides lurch as you feel leather bite into your flesh when he ties the belt around your wrists. He attaches the belt to the railings, restricting your arms’ range of motion.
Helplessness skyrockets inside you. A fresh wave of tears rolls down your cheeks.
“Rafe, please…”
Rafe pulls his zipper down. Impatience grunts leave him as he wriggles out of his pants and boxers, freeing his already rock-hard cock. He yanks your shorts and panties down until the bottom of your body is completely bare to him.
His pupils swell at the sight of your bare cunt, leaving only a thin ring of blue in his dark gaze.
He lines himself with your entrance, pressing his wet tip against your dry lips. He breaches past the tight ring of muscles as you stiffen. An immediate burst of pain scatters through you. Tears dot your lashes as heavy breaths rush from your chest.
It’s clear it’s taking tremendous effort for Rafe to force himself inside your unprepared core. Sweat collects on his brow as he pins you with his broad frame.
When he pushes more of himself inside you, your eyes roll back. You don’t think the agony could worsen but somehow it does.
Your bound hands clench into fists, your nails sinking into your palms.
“Rafe, please, it hurts,” you whimper. His fingers cinch around your throat in response. Your core burns, your lips parting in a soundless scream as Rafe bottoms out inside you. Your vision blurs with tears. Pure hatred oozes off his husky tone as he starts moving inside you. “You don’t get to complain. I don’t want to hear another fucking word from your mouth, do you hear me?” He drags his cock out and slams it inside your aching walls again. “This is what you deserve so you’re gonna fucking take it. Take my cock until I’m done with you.”
You’re in hell as Rafe grunts like an animal in rut above you, uncaring of the strangled sobs leaving your throat.
The expression on his face is downright terrifying, empty of anything but burning rage. In every single thrust, you feel the intensity of his loathing for you. How much he craves to punish you for everything.
To your utter disgust, your cunt grows slick around him, easing his crude assault.
As he notes your arousal coating his length, he lets out a bone-chilling laugh. “So wet already, huh?” Hand still wrapped around your throat, he bends to whisper into your ear. “I always knew you were a slut.” Your breath hitches as he buries himself even deeper, touching a sensitive spot that sends a fresh wave of pain through you. “That’s why I had to keep you in line.” He drops a soft kiss on your cheek as you tremble beneath him. “Sluts like you need a firm hand.”
You’re nothing but a ragdoll under Rafe as he uses you as a vessel for his pent-up anger and frustration. Every time you graze your peak, your body jolting uncontrollably, he pulls out of you out of the blue, pinching your swollen clit until you cry out and reminding you that you’re not allowed to come, that you don’t deserve even a sliver of release.
You’ve always known Rafe was capable of terrible things. But this…This is worse than anything he’s ever done to you. This is the point of no return.
Every time Rafe ruthlessly pounds into you, a bullet-like sensation rips through your flesh, tearing apart any semblance of normalcy, safety that you had. Hot tears skip down your cheeks. You will never feel safe or normal again.
“Did you fuck that Pogue?” he snarls, his warmth breath flowing over your face. You’re so dazed and fucked out, on the cusp of passing out, you can barely keep your thoughts coherent, let alone speak.
“Don’t tell me I already fucked you dumb, princess?” he sneers, annoyance and a sick dose of mirth mingling in his hoarse timbre.
When you fail to provide an answer, he bangs your head against the railings. Pins and needles drill into your skull. He wrenches your head back, pulling on a fistful of your hair until your scalp stings.
“When I ask you a fucking question, you answer,” he seethes. His voice lowers as his eyes dive into yours. “Did you fuck that Pogue?”
“N-No, Rafe,” you wheeze out, your voice weak and defeated.
The marbled floor chafes your back as he steadily ruts into you again, grabbing under your thighs to fuck you even deeper as you weep in silence beneath him.
“Good. You’re mine and no one else’s. Do you understand? That fucking pussy was always mine…and still is.” He unleashes a drawn-out purr, lips parting as you clench around him. “Fuck you’re tight. How the hell are you so tight?” he rasps, his Adam’s apple bobbing. He lets go of your neck to focus on your hips, corralling them firmly in his large hands so he can fuck you with abandon. “God, I missed this,” he moans. His gaze narrows. “Don’t think you’re off the hook just cause you’ve got a tight pussy.”
His thrusts grow sloppier over time. Rafe chases his high while you pant helplessly beneath him. When his warmth spills inside you, a shuddered exhale leaves you. He remains nestled between your bruised walls, his heavy body covering yours as his spent leaks between your ass cheeks, pooling beneath you. He plants a slow, soft kiss on your lips, a disturbing contrast to what he just did to you.
He cups your cheek and strokes the side of your head.
“You took four years from me. And I intend to make up for lost time.” A devilish grin splits across his face. Dread fills you as he adds, “Maybe I’ll even put another one in you, make sure not to miss anything this time.”
“Mommy, mommy! Look at me,” Parker shouts from astride the majestic pure breed pony his father appointed for his fourth birthday.
He waves at you and you return the gesture with a hollow smile.
“I’m watching you, sweetie,” you reply from your lounge chair by the pool.
Above the Cameron mansion, the sun shines bright, the sky a dizzying shade of blue. There’s not a cloud in sight, almost as if Rafe paid them off to steer clear on his son’s special day.
Parker trots around the yard with a big, ecstatic smile on his face, his dad cheering him on nearby. The little boy requested a pony ride for his birthday so, of course, Rafe Cameron made it happen.
There aren’t many things Cameron money cannot buy. A fact he loves taunting you with every chance he gets.
Just like the ridiculous, over the top birthday party he put together, Rafe never misses an occasion to spoil his son rotten since they reunited. Almost as if to show you what you’ve been depriving him of all these years, rub his money in your face and make you feel like a terrible mom.
You can’t deny that it works. Every time Rafe gives Parker something you never could have provided on your own, guilt chews at you. And it’s clear that he knows it, that smug grin always dancing on his face when he catches you looking dejected.
One of the moms in the lounge chair near yours lets out a dreamy sigh as she devours Rafe with her eyes.
“You’re a lucky bitch, you know that? Cute son. Hot husband. What I wouldn’t give to have your life.”
Your teeth clench as you bite down every hateful word searing your tongue. From across the yard, Rafe’s icy blue eyes find yours. He beams at you. A chill travels up your spine. You look away.
“Hm…yeah. I guess I am,” you answer, casting a sour glance at the diamond ring on your finger. The gigantic rock’s shimmer is blinding as it catches the sunlight. To everyone else on Figure Eight, the fancy silver ring is a display of Rafe Cameron’s boundless love and devotion for you. It makes women green with envy. It bruises men’s egos. But you see the exorbitant blood diamond for what it is…An expensive shackle binding you to your gilded cage. A reminder that you’re trapped and there is no safe haven away from him anymore.
Rafe hasn’t failed to find little ways to make you pay since that day. Treating you like an object to satisfy his needs behind closed doors while forcing you to maintain the act of the perfect family in public. Every day you awake dreading he found another way to torment you, some fresh hell to rain upon you.
He never runs out of ways to twist the knife he buried deep within you. Again and again.
When the evening reaches its end, all the guests having vacated the house, Rafe slips behind you as you’re cleaning dishes.
His large hands sweep over your hips and you recoil.
“Rafe…I’m…Can’t we give it a rest, just for today? I’m still sore from the other night,” you plead, desperation making your voice quake.
Before he can answer, Parker interrupts, trailing down the stairs as he yawns.
“Daddy?” he utters drowsily.
The little boy is sporting a brand new pajama his father got him, as he didn’t allow you to keep any of the clothes you got him over the years, calling them low quality and cheap.
He approaches your son at the bottom of the stairs and holds his shoulders, giving him a bright grin. His expression turns fond and prideful as he considers his son. The way Rafe is with his son is a sharp contrast to the way he is with everyone else. The toddler’s become the center of his universe. It nearly makes you feel guilty for hiding him. Nearly. The bruises tattooed all over your skin are a wicked reminder of who Rafe truly is.
“Daddy’s coming soon to tuck you in, okay, P?” He kisses the top of his head. “So go back to your room.”
Parker nods as he lets out another yawn. “Okay.”
“That’s my boy,” he chimes, ruffling his honey blonde curls.
Parker hops up the stairs. When Rafe turns to you, the smile on his face vanishes.
He rushes to you, his hand shooting up to latch around your throat. His deathly grip on your neck crushes your windpipe. You look at him with wide, terrified eyes, your mouth wobbling. An expression edging on murderous decorates his handsome face.
He snickers. “You’re sore? You think I give a fuck? I’m putting Parker to bed, then I want you waiting for me upstairs in that red lingerie set I just bought you.” He leans over you, mumbling in a low, threatening tone. “I meant what I said. You owe me four years, princess.” He licks the errant tear sliding down your cheek. “And I plan on getting every single second back.”
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