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#rancid nuts
cloudcas · 2 years
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Oh god the rancid nuts...
I HAD FORGOTTEN ABOUT THE RANCID NUTS….
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queerdiazs · 17 days
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posting eddie diaz hate will get you unfollowed 🫶🏼
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castielstwigandberries · 11 months
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it's rancid nut november actually
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actoflesbiabism · 3 months
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I'm so serious about this, be very wary of a social event that doesn't have any fat people. Either 20% of the population just decided not to go there by pure happenstance or some number of the regular attendees think it's ok to be huge dicks and sooner or later their behavior will get gross.
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dhanrajenterprise · 9 months
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oxygenabsorber-blog · 10 months
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oxygen absorbs in your peanuts packaging, which will expand the Peanut's life span. It also provides the atmosphere where mold development can be stopped & preventing rancidity .This method of storage is highly preferred to import and export. It requires a lot of time to reach the destination.It even expands the shelf-life of your food to 3× times!
If you are interested in making a purchase with us,  get in touch with us through email:[email protected]   Send us a what's app message on 9879203377  Visit Website https://www.oxygen-absorbers.com
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orteil42 · 7 months
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this place has gotten markedly rancid since the end of the "go nuts show nuts" era
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flatstarcarcosa · 2 years
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opened youtube real quick bc i saw a post that mentioned slade coming back to the show and
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dickspooky · 1 year
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The complete and utter sorrow I feel stepping into the shower when I can smell the deliciously rancid stench of my own nuts, knowing I’m about to wash it off, is devastating…
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Things Change Ch.2 - E.M
Author's Note: Life has eased enough that I bring you some actual writing
Word Count: 3.8k
Pairing: Eddie Munson x Reader
Warnings: Vomit
Tag List: @boomhauer (a patient saint), @corrodedcorpses, @wroteclassicaly . If anyone wants to be tagged, feel free to just hit me up
Going back to classes the following Monday morning hadn’t been the worst. The weekend had passed just the same as it usually did. When Eddie and you were around one another, there were the stolen glances, but otherwise things remained the same. Eddie still teased you from time to time, making you annoyed and shaking your head at him. Before you knew it, two weeks passed in a blink of an eye as finals creeped up on all of the remaining seniors. Group study sessions happened after class with Robin, Nancy, Eddie and yourself in an attempt to all get ready for finals and to get Eddie to a passing grade as he’d been doing better this year than years previously. As usual, you tried to ignore Eddie during these study groups. 
Each day you grew more tired. You couldn’t place it, but you were just so tired all the time. No matter how much you slept. It had been like this for almost two weeks. Coupled with your migraines that you got on occasion, it was making you miserable. You had skipped out on hang outs a few times to opt for sitting in the darkness of your room with a cold pack on your eyes. You had suffered from migraines before, taking medication to help with them, and you were thankful the medication worked. You almost hadn’t let Nancy drag you to the party due to a migraine the day before. Sometimes the next day you were just as wiped out despite sitting in the dark all day. Recently, it was no different with your friends coming to check and make sure you were still alive. You were still exhausted but hadn’t had a migraine in a few days. You attributed it to stress from the ending school year and nothing more. After all, it was finals week.
Deciding to take a break from the stress of the end of the year, you met up with Robin to have some girl time. Nancy opted to study, leaving the two of you to have lunch after abandoning Steve to man the Family Video counter.
“I just like, don’t get it,” Robin said as she slid into the booth across from you at Benny’s.
“What don’t you get?” you laughed as you sat down.
The two of you ordered burgers, deciding to get a third for Steve when you were heading out of the place. It wasn’t uncommon for you to grab lunch with Robin when she had a shift at Family Video. You liked to keep her company and step away from Steve for a while. Besides the other added stress.
“How like he has all these girls, but none of them are perfect, ya know?”
You shrugged. “I think Steve just knows what he wants. He’s not looking for some one off. I don’t blame him.” You couldn’t, really. You didn’t date often because most of it was guys wanting to hook up. If you wanted to hook up with a guy, you would. Immediately, your mind flashed back to Eddie. Him on top of you, his breath against your face as he stretched you around his length.
You were pulled out of your head when the smell of something foul reached your nose. You scrunch your nose, trying to wave away the smell.
“Hey, you okay?” Robin stopped her train of thought, seeing you waving away at your face.
“Do you smell that?” you coughed, feeling overwhelmed by the smell. You pulled your shirt up over your nose in the hopes the smell of your perfume helped dissipate the smell of rancid meat.
Robin raised a brow and sniffed the air. She could smell only their food being made, but nothing bad. “I don’t smell anything, Y/N. Are you sure?” she asked, confused as all she could smell was the sizzling burgers on the grill.
You looked at Robin like she was nuts. “It smells like… rancid. Are you serious? You don’t smell that?!” you asked, feeling your stomach churn at the stench. It smelled like someone had left out meat in the sun, rotting away in the heat. 
“No?”
You felt a sudden lurch in your stomach. One you dreaded feeling as nausea rolled through you. You slid out of the booth quickly and walked as fast as you could to the women’s bathroom. You shoved into a stall, just making it as you leaned over the toilet and expelled everything you had in your stomach. You heard the door open behind you and the stall door push open, someone pulling your hair back.
“Oh, poor thing. I’ll get her some ginger ale!” You heard someone say before they left again. 
“You okay?” Robin asked, tucking back a piece of your hair as you spit into the bowl. A wad of toilet paper was presented to you and you wiped your mouth before tossing the tissue into the bowl and flushing. 
You sat on the floor, rubbing your stomach as you let out a breath. “God damn,” you sighed as Robin felt your head.
“You aren’t warm or anything. Did you eat anything bad today?” Robin asked, and you shook your head. 
The door to the bathroom opened again, and a waitress stepped in. She knelt down beside you and offered the cup to you, straw pointed at your mouth. “Take slow gentle sips, sweetheart. Don’t wanna make yourself sick again.” she urged, letting you take the cup.
You took a few small sips as the waitress told you she’d have your guys’ food bagged up to go. You nodded your head and got up slowly from the bathroom floor, feeling slightly embarrassed at how you suddenly got ill.
“I’ll take you home… well, more like Steve will take you home.” Robin said, leading you out of the bathroom.
The second you stepped out of there, the smell hit you again, and you held your breath. “I’m gonna wait outside.” you practically ran out the door.
—-----------------------
After what happened at Benny’s, the two of you walked back to Family Video. The nausea had subsided from the fresh air and by the time you guys got back; you were hungry once more. Robin checked in on you, asking if you were sure you wanted to eat after puking earlier. You reassured her you felt perfectly fine and had your lunch with Steve and Robin.
The stomach issues continued for a few more days. In the mornings, you woke up feeling fresh but after being awake for a little while; you felt the nausea hit you like a freight train. It never gave you any warning. You would be fine one moment and then suddenly nauseous the second. You always just managed to make it to the bathroom, only missing the bowl twice so far. You checked all the dates on the food in your fridge, finding nothing wrong with any of it. Besides, if it had been something in the house, you would have figured your mom and dad would be sick too, right? Maybe it was something you had at school. There was also quite a bit of stress going on in your life now days away from the last of your final exams.
You waited for that reprieve. Finals week was heading your way and you were ready to get the testing over with. You studied as much as you could, knowing how your parents had pride in your grade point average. You already had a number of colleges lined up that you were slowly hearing from. You just had no idea what you wanted to do in school. Something your parents kept reassuring you was fine, but being a doctor was a fine choice indeed. Or a lawyer. Being an only child was overbearing, and it made you wonder how you had survived this long. Your parents hovered, the calendar marked with every final you had and your mother shoving a good breakfast at you so you would do well on your final exams. You just wished you could keep that breakfast down and get adequate rest for once. You didn’t even admit to your mom that you weren’t going to eat the breakfast as you’d see it again soon anyway. Instead you found yourself able to eat it later in the morning. 
The finals themselves didn’t feel the worst for you. It was dealing with your sickness while testing that had thrown you for a loop. You had to excuse yourself a few times to run to the bathroom to be sick, thankfully having enough time when you came back to finish your exam. When you took your last final, it felt like a weight had been lifted off of your shoulders. Steve decided to treat all of you to some pizza with finals out of the way. Eddie had seemed the most nervous out of all of you. Nancy had reassured him they prepped him well, and he was definitely going to pass this year. Even you agreed that you were sure he would be passing with you all.
With finals out of the way, the rest of the school year was more relaxed. You went in every day more so having the time to say goodbye to your peers and focus on the future ahead of you. For Eddie, as you heard from Dustin, it was about finishing out the best campaign Hellfire had ever done. Since Eddie was leaving, the helm was going to be passed down to one of the other upperclassmen. 
It was close to eight pm when you heard from Nancy. Your phone rang and you picked it up. “Y/N! Hey, it’s Nancy. I’m sorry to bother you.” She sighed, “My car is dead and Steve is on another date. Is there a chance you could go get the boys at Hellfire?”
“Your car is dead?” You asked, checking the time and humming. “I can go get the boys. Don’t worry about it.” You reassured her.
“Oh, my god. Thank you! Mom would have been pissed if I didn’t get Mike home on time.”
“No problem, Nance. I’ll grab him.”
You hung up the phone and slid out of bed, grabbing your car keys before slipping your shoes on. You left the house as quietly as you could, sliding into your car and heading back towards Hawkins High. Your parents rarely minded if you were going to get the boys, but considering the time, it was best to sneak out. When you pulled into the parking lot, it was desolate except for Eddie’s van. You parked your car and slid out of it, intending to go inside to get the boys. As you headed for the double doors, you could hear them before you even saw them. The boys were rowdy as they spilled out from the doors. Mike, Dustin, and Lucas spotted you quickly, calling out your name and waving. Soon all the boys were around you as they told you of Eddie’s latest campaign that he cooked up for the end of the year. 
“Honestly, it’s so tough but what should we have expected? Eddie to go easy on us?” Lucas scoffed.
“Eddie? Go easy on you boys? Never.” you laugh with a shake of your head.
“Perhaps you should have joined us, sweetheart.” Eddie slid up beside Lucas, shoulder checking him a little bit. 
“You know I don’t play, Eddie.”
“I could be your Master and teach you.” he winked, prompting a whine from the younger three males of the group.
“Okay, ew! We don’t need to hear you be weird with y/n, Eddie.” Dustin complained before loudly fake gagging. 
“Ha ha, very funny.” you rolled your eyes at Eddie, now ready to leave now that he was being weird.
“It’s alright. I doubt you could handle the bloody details anyway of what happens in our campaigns. Descriptions of blood, pulsing guts and rotting flesh with flies crawling out of it after laying eggs in the supple flesh.” Eddie went on with a grin.
As the boys laughed, you were the only one not laughing as your stomach suddenly was hit with a wave of nausea. Please not now, you pleaded, but before you could have more time to will the nausea back down, you could feel it coming up. You turned without looking, emptying the contents of your stomach onto the floor, but it wasn’t the floor. “Oh, my god!” Gareth yelled out as your vomit hit his shoes instead of the concrete below. He jumped back out of the way as you gagged once more. The boys all fell quiet and a moment later, someone was pulling your hair back. When you finished, you groaned softly, pulling tissues from your pocket to wipe your mouth clean. In your other pocket, mints. You lifted your head and the person holding onto it let go. When you turned, you hadn’t expected Eddie to be so close. 
“Shit, sweetheart. I didn’t think gore bothered you that much.” Eddie said, watching you. 
“You look a little pale…” Jeff noted, “You sure you can take them back?”
“My shoes,” Gareth whined softly, kicking his feet in an attempt to get the chunks off of his chucks. 
“Shut it, Emerson.” Eddie hissed at the boy, much to the surprise of everyone in the group, as he watched your cheeks burn and your eyes move away from everyone else.
“Did you have the sloppy joe at lunch today?” Jeff asked, making Gareth gag in response.
You nodded your head, tossing two mints into your mouth. “Let’s go, boys. Before I puke on you all.” you told them and headed over to your car. The young ones were quick to follow, occasionally asking if you were okay. Each one wishing you to feel better as you dropped them off at their homes and you tried to ignore the embarrassment of puking on Gareth’s shoes.
As soon as you got home, you carefully went back to your bedroom. You shut the door, pressing your back to it and taking a breath before slowly letting it out. Your stomach was fine now. It was beginning to get annoying how often you moved between feeling ill and feeling fine. You pushed yourself off of your door as you made your way to your bathroom. You scrub at your teeth before hopping into the shower to scrub yourself clean of the memory of puking on Gareth’s shoes. Something you would absolutely have to apologize for once you could look at him again.
—----------------------------------------------
“You what on Gareth’s shoes?” Nancy asked again.
You groaned, shoving your pillow onto your face. Hearing a slight snicker you lifted your hand, presenting your middle finger in the direction of Robin’s amusement.
“I puked on Gareth’s shoes.” your muffled reply sounded.
“You’ve been doing that a lot lately,” Nancy murmured, and you could practically hear the frown in her words.
“So?” Robin had asked, “nothing else has been wrong.”
“Still, to be randomly nauseous like that for this long? It’s been what?”
You pulled the pillow off of your face and sat up on your bed. “Few weeks.” you answer. From the face Nancy is making, you could tell her journalism mind was at work. You raised a brow at her.
“I mean, have you eaten any weird fish lately or anything?” Robin asked, “cause what if it’s just a super, super bad case of like food poisoning or something. Or! Or!”
“When was the last time you had a period?”
Nancy’s question made both you and Robin fall silent and stare at her in shock. “I…” a sudden panic washed over you like a cold wave of water hitting you on a hot summer day. You slid off of your bed and run to your calendar pinned on the wall. Robin pressed behind you, watching you could up the days leading to the red dots on your calendar. “My last period… should have… should have been over a week ago,” you murmured, thankful for Robin behind you as you suddenly felt lightheaded.
“You’re late.” Robin said softly, tapping the current day and how many days between now and when your dots were. “Not over a week. Over two weeks.” Robin corrected your counting.
“That’s… that’s impossible,” you mumble frantically to yourself.
Nancy moved over to your night table, opening up the drawer where she knew you kept your medicine in. She plucked the package of birth control up easily and began counting up the pills. Her brow furrowed as she counted over them again. 
“Is a dose missing?” Robin asked her and Nancy shook her head.
“No, there isn’t.” Nancy answered.
“So I can’t be! I haven’t missed any doses!” you insist, but Nancy seems less convinced. 
“I mean… how effective is it? Like, can it just like… fail?” Robin asked the room.
Nancy was still inspecting the package when another box caught her eye. She picked it up, reading the label on the box and shaking it slightly. “How long have you been taking these?” she asked, showing you the box.
You looked at the bottle in her hand. “Uh, like, once in a while. I was getting some wicked migraines. Doctor told me to try those.” you answer and Nancy frowns.
“Did they mention anything about it interfering with birth control?” she asked.
You stared at her. “That… that can happen?” you asked, voice small and insecure as you realized maybe somehow you had made this happen.
Nancy turned the box over in her hands and shook out the paper pamphlet. She unfolded it, eyes scanning over the contents quickly. A breath she had been holding was let go. “That’s it. Get your shoes on. Both of you.” she announced, setting aside the paper and going for her own shoes.
“Where are we going?!” Robin asked as she grabbed her shoes, struggling to pull them onto her feet.
“The pharmacy.”
—------------------------------------------------
The drive to the pharmacy was a relatively quiet one. It seemed none of you knew what to say or do. You went to the pharmacy instead of Melvalds, not wanting to risk possibly running into Joyce who would absolutely have questions if she saw you buying pregnancy tests. Nancy parked the car and the three of you walked into the store. You stuck close to the girls, unsure what to do with yourself. When you got to the aisle you needed the three of you stood there looking at the different boxes.
“Does… does it matter which kind we get?” Robin asked. “This is terrifying.”
“I mean, I would think either way it’ll do what it has to.” Nancy said, glancing at you.
You stared at the wall of pregnancy tests. “How…” you murmur, unsure what to do with yourself. 
“Here,” Nancy grabbed two boxes. “This is more than enough.” 
Robin grabbed two more boxes. “Just to be sure.” she shrugged when you both looked at her. The three of you approached the counter, dumping the contents onto it as the cashier raised a brow at you. It was a teen, thankfully. Not that you needed an adult breathing down your neck right now. After paying for all the tests, the three of you shuffled back to Nancy’s car and headed straight for your home once more.
As soon as the three of you shut up into your room, the boxes were being opened. Robin ran downstairs to get you a drink, returning with a huge glass of water. 
“What?” she asked when she saw the look on your face. “You have a lot of peeing to do!”
“Good point.” you answer, taking the glass and starting to chug down the water.
Nancy picked up one of the paper instructions from the box and began reading through it. “Okay, so it’s going to take a couple of minutes before we see anything. Let’s try two for right now,” she decided, taking out two of the sticks and holding them out to you.
You grab the tests, hesitating before going to the bathroom. You set the tests down before shimmying your pants and panties down then moving to sit on the toilet. You take the sticks, reaching between your thighs and watching to make sure you got them covered and wiping yourself clean. After washing your hands, you take them back out to the girls and set them on the night table. Robin immediately turns them over so you can’t see the result.
“Why did you do that?” you asked her and she shrugs.
“I don’t want you watching it develop and get your hopes up… or down.” she explains. 
The three of you sit back as you wait for the tests to develop. You didn’t know what you would do if you were pregnant. You were barely graduating highschool. Your last finals were only last week. Your graduation started to inch closer and closer. Your hands found their way to rest on your stomach. Has it changed at all? You weren’t sure. You assumed it was bloating. Maybe it hadn’t been. Still, that didn’t change the fact that you still had no idea what to do if you were pregnant. Would you tell your parents? Well, you supposed you’d have to since you lived in their home. What about college? What about… You didn’t want to think about him. Not yet. It would be fine. You prayed for a stomach bug. Nancy seemed so sure of herself, though. It was hard to dispute it. A hand gently grabbed your shoulder and you glanced over at Nancy.
“It’s time.” she murmured, looking at the two sticks sitting on the nightstand.
You take a deep breath, reaching for the tests. They felt warm in your hands and you shut your eyes as you turned them over. You stare down at the tests. They were blue. You look over at Nancy as she holds the box. She bit her lip, looking up at you.
“I’m pregnant.” you breathed, looking back down at the two blue sticks. 
—----------------------------
You end up using the two other tests you had purchased. All of them had come out positive. You sat there with all the positive tests, unsure what to do now.
“So, who is it?” Robin asked you, gently kicking your shoe with her foot as she sat across from you on the floor. Nancy was sitting beside you.
“What?” you asked softly, looking up at Robin.
“Who’s, ya know, the dad?” 
You could feel Nancy’s eyes boring into the side of your head. You knew she knew. “I don’t wanna talk about it, Rob.” you murmur. It’s not that you don’t trust Robin, but you knew how hard it was for her to keep a secret sometimes. She would surely end up telling Steve. Even if she didn’t mean to. Which might lead Steve to wanting to ‘talk’ to Eddie. Nancy grabbed your hand, squeezing reassuringly. How could you let anyone know who it was? You didn’t want to ruin his life like that. Not when he just, finally, graduated highschool after trying multiple times. You couldn’t spring this on him. Even if you didn’t particularly like Eddie, you couldn’t ruin his life like this.
You just couldn’t.
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itsscromp · 1 year
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Dark times
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Heyo, For this story, Me and my bestie @callofdudes came up with this storyline soon after the zombie trailer was released. So I decided to grace the world with our story. Warning, Angst. Blood and gore. Word count:1.3k
The news reported that there was a new virus on the horizon. Everyone was to be cautious and resilient. But you all didn't know the extent of how bad the virus would be. This virus turned everyone into living corpses within a few seconds. Even though you were all safe on the base. The measurements to keep everyone safe were very extreme.
No one was allowed outside, Everyone was checked for symptoms every day and you had to wash your clothes every day as well. No groups of 10 people to be together. Thankfully you five don't count as a large group. Thank goodness.
"This is fucking nuts" You looked outside, You just wanted everything to go back to normal.
"I didn't think it would come to this." Price was standing next to you, looking out at the base once full now dead quiet as everyone was forced into their buildings.
This made you very sad, You were worried for your friends and family. Were they ok ?? Were they safe and sound ??, You couldn't find out as the cell service has been taken down.
Even though you had each other, There were certain challenges. Like today, you found that you were all running low on food. The ration supply drying up quicker than you all thought.
"Shit... This is bad"
Johnny pouted, digging back into his chip packet. Out again.
"Ok... I know it's risky, but we need to go out"
Everyone went quiet, Looking at each other expecting an answer, Price knew this would be very risky. He wanted to make sure you were all safe, But to be safe. You all needed food.
"It is risky, But we can't run out of food." Simon spoke up.
"Ok... Simon and I will go out, You guys stay back at base ok ??"
The three looked immensely worried. They didn't want anything to happen to you both, But right now they were running out of options.
"Ok... Be safe, Try and contact us if you get into trouble." Price said.
"Got it"
Before you left. Gaz and johnny both brought you into a tight group hug.
"Be safe you guys" Johnny said.
"We'll be back, and with food." Simon patted his back.
You and Simon then geared up, Putting on as many armour plates as possible and grabbing your rifles and other necessities. Before then you both began your mission to the nearby grocery store. Walking the dead streets, You saw all the havoc that was there on the day the world as you knew it descended into chaos. cars crashed into one another, Blood ridden on the streets, and even corpses.
"Let's hope we can grab whatever we can and then hightail it back to base sergeant."
"Agreed"
You knew the roads into the city and around the place in the back of your head. But it felt so much more ominous now. It was actually terrifying.
Once you reached the store, You found that the doors were barricaded. Now you could just break them, but it would cause severe consequences for you and simon.
"We need to find another way in"
Simon looked around for a potential way in and then found the air vents.
"Over there"
He then went over and began unscrewing the vent lid gently.
"It's gonna be a tight squeeze for you"
"I'll manage"
Being the brick shithouse Simon was, It would be slightly impossible, but not impossible at the same time. The two then squeezed in, shifting through the hatch inside the supermarket. Simon unscrewed the lid and you both hopped down inside.
"Score 1 for the 141" You turned on your flashlight and began looking around.
"Let's see what we can find"
You both walked from aisle to aisle, grabbing as much as you could. Fruit and Veg were a no-go as they were now rotten. Dairy and meat were a big no-no. Simon gagged when he smelt the off-products. Quickly avoiding it.
"Oh fuck that's foul !!" You pinched your nose.
"Fucking rancid" He said, pinching his nose as well.
Going down another aisle, you were lucky enough to find chips and things for Johnny and Gaz.
"Today is your lucky day guys." You began to bag them up.
Simon found some drinks that didn't need to be refrigerated, some packs of cigars behind the counter and such. "Covering all bases.."
But as they continued packing y/n heard a noise which cause them to stand still.
"Shhh"
Simon froze, listening to the silence. Needing to hear it again, His hand instinctively reaching back for his gun, slowly.
The noise eventually came back, a low growl. You weren't alone. Simon put down his bag and gripped his rifle, motioning you over to him.
"Get behind me" He whispered.
You did so, watching behind with your switchblade ready in hand. Hearing the noise get closer and closer. There it was, an infected. It's jaw unattached. Blood dripping with it's skin decomposing and eyes white. Shuffling slowly.
Simone raised his gun seeing how disgusting it looked, It made your skin crawl. Shooting it in the head. It popped open easily like a ripe watermelon, Blood splattering everywhere.
"Gross"
"Watch your step... I doubt you want it on your boot"
Walking over the corpses, the two then continued one with looking for food.
"Ok I think we've got enough"
"Then we get back out of here"
Simon wouldn't say it but being out here put him on edge, He wanted you to be safe... He wouldn't know what to do if his best friend got infected. The two then crawled back out of the vent with the food in hand. Only to be found surrounded by infected as they heard Simon's gunshot.
"Shit"
The two then grabbed your rifles and opened fire on the zombies, mowing down as much as you could. But you both were caught in a rock and a hard place when you realised you were running low on ammo.
'Shit, I'm running low." You loaded in your last magazine.
"You got any grenades ??"
Simon checked his belt handing one to you.
"Two, that's all I got"
"Then let's make it count"
Nodding, You both pulled the pins and threw them, They blew up, sending any zombie caught in the blast backwards, After the dust cleared. You both were confident that you got them all.
"Come on, Let's get the bloody hell out of here" He urged you forward.
You then spotted an untouched car, Bingo your ticket out of here. Gently unlocking it and hotwiring it, you managed to start it up. and it had some good amount of fuel left.
"Simon, Hop in"
He nodded, placing the food in the backseat and you both heading back to the base.
Johnny stared out at the window, Hoping you two would return safe and sound. The anxiety creeping in on him of the worst. He didn't want anything to happen to his friends. His best friends to be exact. And then he saw a car at the front, The doors opening to reveal you two.
"Their back !!" He alerted Gaz and Price.
"They are ??" Gaz got up and followed him.
As soon as you two entered back inside, Johnny hugged you both. "Oh thank heaven's bells, you're back !! Are you two okay??, you were gone a little while, I- we were worried"
"We got surrounded... But we're ok" You softly smiled at him"
Johnny sighed in relief, then spotting the bags and perked up. "wow, what did you two find ??"
You all gathered around the table and placed the food of what you could find. "The only food we can't have anymore is dairy and fruit and veg."
"It's all we need, thank you, you two" Price softly smiled. Happy that his soldiers... his kiddos were back safe and sound.
He grabbed one of the cold containers of food and opened it up, still good. this would be dinner, he hoped you would all survive, he knew you would. him and his team, You all went through worse. This would be no different.
Taglist: @callofdudes @fun-k-board
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doggygirlowner · 8 months
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legit frustrated theres nobody else to smell my rancid nuts before i take a shower
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mothybean · 3 months
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Airhead Part 4
My schedule the following week was insanely jam packed. It was as if all of my professors congregated to drop an assignment nuke on us. I had about 10 different assignments to complete, 3 of them were Heimerdinger’s. He drove me nuts. I had a feeling that he only became a college professor to stroke his own ego;surround himself with others who were “less intelligent” than him to make himself feel superior. I’m pretty sure it was compensation for his height. He was as tall as a stepping stool. I don’t think there was one person in our class that liked him. The moment his name was mentioned, faces would scrunch as if they just caught a whiff of rancid garbage mixed with sulfur on a hot summer's eve.
I was drowning. I was back where I started, semi clueless. Humpledink must’ve had a sixth sense knowing I was receiving help and decided to bump up the difficulty of the material. Either that, or it was my own fault for daydreaming in class. Those baby blue clouds were still vivid in my mind. I’ve been thinking about her ever since. I didn’t have the courage to reach out to her, even though I wanted to. A part of me was super nervous to even see her again. I kept running through possible scenarios of us studying together, a lot of them were painfully cringey. My biggest worry of them all was that it was going to be mega awkward.
I sat at my desk, staring at my science assignment, my hands tangled in my hair with frustration. I reread the first question at least ten times and I still didn’t understand what he was asking. Why was this so fucking difficult?! I groaned and gently knocked my forehead against my desk. I kept my head pressed against the wood, drumming my fingers against my skull. I inhaled deeply, running the idea through my head a few times before exhaling. That's it. I had to bite the possibly awkward bullet and let Jinx know I needed help.
Once again, I stood in front of Vi and Jinx’s home, only this time I ditched the weighted backpack and just brought my laptop. I figured I’d travel light in case I needed to make a run for it again-which I promised myself I wouldn’t. I was crushing hard on her. How did I expect to get close if I put distance between us? I gave the front door a solid few knocks and glanced down at the familiar cursive words beneath my feet. They needed to toss this damn thing, it didn’t match the vibe on the inside. I wasn’t a fan of cheesy suburban white mom decor. No offense.
I heard the door unlock, my eyes still glaring at the jute mat. I adjusted my laptop in my arms, silently taking a deep breath to soothe my nerves. With what little courage I managed to summon, I lifted my foot off the porch step, but immediately froze once I took notice of who answered. Jinx stood in the doorway wearing an oversized white t-shirt, a mischievous grin plastered on her lips. Her hair, no longer in braids, fell to her ankles like silky curtains. I swallowed hard. Could this girl be anymore attractive?
“H-hi.” I stammered, trying my best to keep my composure as my eyes ping ponged from her’s to her legs to my feet. Not even a couple of seconds in and I already feel like I’m making a fool of myself. Nice one Y/N.
“Hey Y/N.” She greeted me in a husky tone, pushing the door open wider to let me in. “Let’s get to it.” She smiled and flipped her hair over her shoulder as she started down the hallway, leaving me stunned at the door. I stood on the front porch watching her hips slightly sway with each step. Damn. I cleared my throat and furrowed my brows, reeling my eyes back into my sockets. I needed to chill. I was here for a study session, not a simp session.
I stepped inside, softly closing the door behind me. Eager to be close to my blue hair crush, I kicked my shoes off near the rack and walked down the hall with haste. I felt like I was gonna puke. I entered the living room, gripping the life out of my laptop. There she was, sitting comfortably on the far end of the couch, one foot propped up on the cushion, the other planted on the floor. Suddenly, studying became a distant memory as my eyes hungrily scanned the blue haired angel, tracing her tattoos yet again. I desperately wanted to touch them. I bet she was as soft as she looked.
“You ready?” Jinx asked, twirling her hair around her finger, a devious smirk still plastered. Something told me she knew I had the hots for her. Anyone with eyeballs could tell. I made it painfully obvious. I was never great at hiding my true feelings, especially when I was embarrassed. My facial flushing always gave it away. It wasn’t a cute pink tint either. My cheeks would go redder than the devil’s ass cheeks. I’d be shit out of luck if I wanted to pursue professional poker.
“Mhm.” I murmured, sitting on the opposite end of the couch as her, my hands slightly trembling as I opened my laptop to turn it on.
From my peripheral vision, I noticed Jinx staring at me, still twirling her long bluenette locks around her index finger. Avoiding her obvious gaze, I kept my eyes forward, intensely staring at my laptop’s update screen as if it was the most interesting thing in the room. Of course it would be updating right this second. I tapped my fingertips lightly against the touchpad, hoping my taps would encourage my hunk of junk to update faster.
“Technical difficulties?” Jinx questioned with a small chuckle, scooching a tad closer to me to inspect my screen. My mouth felt like the desert.
“Yeah…I’ve had this thing for a while. I’ve been denying the updates for so long I guess it finally had enough.” I laughed nervously, bouncing my leg slightly as I watched the update percentage rise slowly. I cupped my hands around the back of my neck and let my elbows fall. Safe to say it was time for a new computer.
I felt Jinx shift on the couch, causing my specific cushion to sink a bit on the side. Before I could even glance over at her, her legs stretched out across my lap, on top of the laptop.
“Oh!” I gasped, my eyes darting back and forth between her silky smooth legs and my piece of shit laptop. At that moment, I didn’t give a damn if the thing fell to the ground and shattered into a million pieces if it meant staying in our current position.
“Whaddya think?” Jinx asked, her hands dragging the hem of her oversized white shirt upwards, revealing her upper thighs. “I’m thinking about getting more tattoos, but I’m not sure what to get yet.”
I stared at her legs, my mouth slightly agape as I studied the blue clouds that traveled up her right leg. I gulped, unsure of what to do or say, this was so abrupt. The only thought that bounced around was to let my hands fall onto her beautiful legs. Using what little courage I had in me, my eyes traveled up her legs towards her thighs, stopping briefly at her pastel lavender underwear that was slightly visible before finally meeting her eyes.
“They’re…” I started, my eyes taking a quick peek at her underwear again before looking back at her. “They’re great.”
Jinx chuckled dryly and laid down on her back, not once removing her eyes from mine.
“Ya think so?” She definitely knew. I already knew I was crimson red, that was a no brainer. It was a dead give away at this point. I nodded, still staring into her blue orbs. Jinx found the hem of her shirt again, rubbing the fabric in between her fingers for a moment before slowly lifting her shirt up even more, her underwear fully visible at this point.
My body tensed as I felt the full weight of her legs on mine. I glanced at my laptop, slightly hoping the update was complete as an excuse to collect myself. Ironically, the percentage was at 69%. I felt myself blush even harder as an intrusive thought conjured after seeing the sexually coded number. What the hell was even happening? Looking back over, Jinx’s shirt was now lifted up high enough for me to see everything up to her collar bones.
“I think it suits me. What do you think, Y/N?” She questioned as she slightly moved her left leg against my stomach. Holy hell I was going to explode if she kept touching me.
“Yeah, I agree…” I trailed off. I felt like a horny teenage boy as I drooled over her figure, mentally marking the parts of her I wanted to kiss the most.
Jinx quickly sat up, her legs still weighted on mine and leaned against the back of the couch, her face mere inches from mine.
“What’s wrong?” Her tone was playful. I glanced at the laptop, checking the percentage. It was stalling at 99%. Come on you stupid piece of shi-
Jinx removed her legs off of me and stood up from the couch, almost knocking the computer off my lap in the process. She stood in front of me with her arms crossed as her eyes traveled from my face down to my laptop. Her face was hard to read, the smirk she was wearing was replaced with a more neutral expression. I had no idea what was going on inside of her mind and that scared me.
I looked back at the screen and a wave of relief washed over me. The update finally finished, the screen now displaying the home screen. I opened my mouth to say something, but Jinx took the computer off my lap and placed it next to me. I raised an eyebrow in question, watching as she slowly took a step forward, placing her hands on either side of my head, her palms against the back of the couch.
“Do you think we should study later?” Jinx asked in a sultry voice, her face leaning closer to mine. My heart was pounding. Was she about to kiss me? Our lips, centimeters from touching, a sudden annoying beeping sound echoed throughout the living room. I pulled back from her face and looked around for the source.
“Get up.” Jinx said sternly. I furrowed my brows, unsure of what she meant. “Get up.” She repeated as she pushed off the couch.
My eyes shot open, my eyes darting around my surroundings. I was in my bedroom. Holy shit, that was a dream?
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fredwkong · 1 year
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I just started a vacation a couple days ago to spend time with my family in New Hampshire.. and they're already driving me nuts. Is there anywhere that you can send me where I could spend time feeling like a proper Southern country Boy? Going hunting and camping shooting off fireworks like I don't give a fuck and just enjoying myself and the company of any of my friends that I decided to make along the way
Thanks for your booking with FWK Vacations. We’re connecting to your down south getaway right now! Please get comfortable and prepare.
You’re awakened by someone jumping on top of you. As you jerk awake, your bro gleefully sits down on your face and blasts you with a wet, rancid protein fart. You lick his bare hole with your extra-long tongue in retaliation, making him howl.
You get out of your sleeping bag and look around. All the bros are stirring in the early morning air. Even after a crazy Fourth full of beer, fireworks, and hard fucking, it’s hard to sleep in on the hard country ground. Two of your bros have decided to warm up by double teaming a third, their thick cocks jackhammering into his mouth and hole as his neglected dick leaks onto his sleeping bag.
You run your fingers through your thick ruddy chest hair and snap the waistband of your American Flag speedo. It’s blasphemous towards the flag or whatever, but you figure it’s stood for worse than your big ginger cock. You were the only one to put on clothes after last night’s festivities, so you're like, repping national pride or whatever.
You’re brought out of what has become a gooning session, fondling your bulge in your flag briefs and sniffing your unwashed pits, by a grumble in your stomach. You need some protein. You spot one of the bros, the one with the lowest hanging bull balls, and head for him. With your thick bro muscles and carpet of musky red hair, you’re clearly the alpha bro, so you can take what you want from any of the others.
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Enjoy your vacation!
Want to go on vacation? Drop me an ask!
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after seeing all that theyfab discourse from white trans people it’s so refreshing to see someone talk about how transphobic that term is. Thank you for being one of the few sane people on tumblr
i find going outside regularly to experience life's trials and tribulations and handling it all like a mature adult makes it easy to not have rancid, out-of-touch takes. like yeah girl being a transfem is hard but it has always been hard. we have thrived anyways and will continue to do so. you can either nut up and roll with the punches or be a whiny loser on the internet who blames all of her problems on other people. also not being a middle class european/ameripean makes being a well adjusted adult a lot easier tbh
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cattimeswithjellie · 1 year
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I do have to say that I'm absolutely nuts for Tango taunting Bdubs about finally getting him back for that completely rancid bogey betrayal in Last Life. Bdubs' response, that it was a totally different situation because killing Tango made him happy and being killed by Tango made him sad, was also classic Bdubs all the way.
In Limited Life, everybody clearly remembers the whole series and they're making it each others' problem at a fantastic rate. I love it!
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