#remus is an idiot and janus loves him still

[beauty-and-passion]

This is going to sound really strange but the most recent GRWM video has. Some of the best Janus characterisation I think we’ve seen in a while?? Also he canonically sheds now, so

You are not wrong, anon: this is the best characterization in a while. It's way better than the last one, in which Janus was mostly a drunk idiot, and it's way worse than SvS. This one sits in the middle: it's not bad, it's not amazing. It's good.

Just like Mr. Sanders' last videos regarding Sanders Sides, this GRWM is okay. Not groundbreaking, not impressive, not deep, not stupid. Just okay.

And trust me, this is the best possible outcome! When I found out Thomas was planning a video with Janus and it was a GRWM and Janus had questions to answer... I wasn't just scared, oh no. I was absolutely terrified. I feared to see the destruction of Janus' character. I feared to see him being all like: "YASSS QUEEN all I love is WINE and nothing else, also being SASSY is my religion BIATCH".

And we got a bit of that, sure. But it was a bit, not the avalanche I expected. I was bearable.

After all, this is just a random video. There's nothing plot-related here. Heck, there's not even too much Sanders Sides stuff, because this GRWM clearly was Thomas' attempts to reconnect with the character. I shouldn't care too much about it. I shouldn't overanalyze it.

But you know me: you know I love to over-analyze. And if you know me, you also know that Remus is my favorite child, but Janus has a special place in my heart and if one little thing about him is off I will start rambling.

Hence why I will overanalyze the shit out of these 9 minutes of a video and I will do what I shouldn't do, i.e. look back into the past's characterization. Not for shaming Mr. Sanders for not remembering it (even if the videos still exist and he can watch them too if he wants), but to remind you all of Janus' personality. The public needs to remember what kind of character he was and who he became.

So I'll over-analyze everything and no, you can't escape. You're stuck with me here, so put your seatbelt on, because you're in for one of the things I love the most: talking about Janus.

The importance of nuance

Let's talk about make-up a little bit. Don't worry, by the end you will understand my point.

The current make-up isn't even comparable to the past one. And if a lot of people complain about it and prefer the old one, it's not because they're all demanding: it's because of nuances.

Let me explain and let's start with the current photo Mr. Sanders showed to promote the GRWM video:

If you look at this make-up, your eyes will inevitably be drawn towards that sharp black line. And as soon as you will look at it, you will immediately register it as a drawn line.

It's so clear and so evident it's a line, I can literally see the black liquid eyeliner, the tip and the hand tracing that line on Thomas' skin.

But this line isn't supposed to be a line: it's supposed to be/resemble a snake's mouth.

Now, look at the past make-up:

The line isn't sharp black: the line is nuanced. You can see a bit of brown and a hint of red/pink to give it depth and emphasize the shadow.

Also, this color is very similar to the little shadow given by Thomas' upper lip on the lower one, so it looks more natural against his skin tone. It doesn't seem like something added on him, but on something that was already part of him. And isn't that the goal of make-up? To add something and disappear, so people won't notice it exists in the first place?

Look at the eye as well: the past one is a softer, more nuanced pink. It looks more natural, against Thomas' skin tone. The present one is so dark, it looks more like a bad bruise.

So the problem with the current make-up isn't just that the colors aren't the same: it's that the current colors are too much. They're too sharp, too saturated and, consequently, too fake. It's clear that Thomas wears make-up, while in the past the blend was softer, the colors closer to Thomas' actual complexion. Consequently, the make-up faded and gave us an illusion of reality.

I know Mr. Sanders had skin conditions and everything, but I'm talking about colors and nuances here. Two things a make-up artist should know better than me, an idiot on the Internet who loves art, color theory and learns from artists on the web. You can obtain these things independently of the used products.

So my opinion on the make-up would be: please Mr. Sanders, switch for softer tones, no sharp black and no coral. Too much. Nuance is the key.

And not just for make-up.

---

The fakeness of reality tv

Janus enjoys reality television because nothing about it is real. His specific words are:

I very much enjoy reality television: the scheming, the plotting, the lying. Every person for himself and even on top of that, all of the production none of reality television is actually real. It's just delightful.

I get the idea behind it and I understand why Thomas thought it was a good choice. On paper, it works: Janus should enjoy this kind of show because it's made of lies and he's Deceit.

But if I follow this line of thought, I inevitably meet with Janus from Into the Unknown:

[Patton]: Well yeah I guess you'd like it, everyone all dressed up, disguised as someone else... [Janus]: How is it we've had so many of these visits and you still know so little about me?

Janus himself said that not everything associated with lies is something he enjoys. And it makes sense, because Logan too said the same thing in the last Aside:

"Is that all I am to you? The reading guy?"

So now I'm asking: why does he like reality tv? Just because it's fake? Then why is he so happy about it being fake? Reality tv should represent reality, it should mirror how society works. And thanks to SvS, we know Janus doesn't hold society into high consideration:

[Deceit]: Society itself is a lie! (...) You get enough people to share a piece of land and breathe the same air and... you've got a society. Why? It's just a bunch of people in the same general area. It's an abstract concept, as real as the monster under your bed! But we obey these rules or get punished for breaking them. All in the name of society. It's absurd and terrifying.

Just like society, reality tv has a group of people put together and they make a society. It's an abstract concept, as real as the monster under your bed. And these people must obey the rules or get punished for breaking them.

And yet, Janus doesn't think reality tv is "absurd and terrifying", but "delightful".

Again: why does he like it? Why does he like something so similar to what he hates most?

Maybe you can live with the "It's fake" explanation and that's good for you. But what if instead of liking reality tv because "it's fake", Janus likes it, because it perfectly mirrors the flaws and the emptiness of society? What if he enjoys it, because he loves the irony of society using its own means to unmask itself and show its real face? What if he watches it, not because "it's delightful", but because it's bittersweet to see such an inability to understand your own flaws?

Which explanation do you think is more fitting for his character?

---

Remus eats glue sticks

Of course he does. His digestive system is probably able to digest molten lava, so glue sticks are a walk in the park for him, bless his chaotic soul <3

(Have I already said Remus is my favorite boi?)

---

The possibilities of shedding

Okay, the "Have you considered not having pores?" is hilarious and I love it on multiple levels.

Well, here we are. Janus sheds, two to four times a year. And I know the fandom went crazy over this and I'm happy for you... but I never really cared too much about it.

I mean: it's fine, but I can't really think of anything truly special to headcanon about it. Snakes shed their skin all the time and they just chill around, while slowly peeling their skin off. It's not dangerous, it doesn't hurt, it's just exfoliation time✨. I mean, does it hurt you, when you remove sunburnt skin? Don't think so. The worst thing for snakes is probably not being able to take the skin off with hands, since they don't have hands.

But hey, this is canon now, so I should probably integrate it in my headcanon. And I can do it in two different ways:

The shedding is just part of Janus' routine: twice a year he gets one day off, takes a reeeeally long bath and slowly peels off his skin until he's done.

I can take inspiration from this fanart and imagine the shedding as a real "leaving your body behind" process, in which Janus slowly gets submerged into his room and re-emerges as a form of pure power and instincts, which then solidifies into a new body. I think I like this idea more, because when I go with Janus, I need something that makes him look either more god-like or more monster-like.

And since we're talking about snake traits, how many more does he have? Because I already added a few on my list, like:

sunbathing

climbing trees

laying everywhere (especially on trees)

taking long relaxing baths

And I'm just waiting for an excuse to add "mating". But I suppose only future will tell.

---

What you don't like

"An important aspect of being oneself, in addition to knowing what you like, is knowing what you don't like and saying to that thing: ew get away from me, I don't like you... Roman"

Okay, that was genuinely funny and it made me smile, so kudos for that, Mr. Sanders. It was a clever move and I enjoyed it.

Also, for more reasons I will explain further down, this makes me want to write a conversation between Janus and Roman, to study how they work together, why they don't like each other and their personalities in general. My only problem would be to put it on a timeline, because I don't like to write things suspended in a temporal vacuum. If inspiration strikes, maybe I'll do it.

---

Religion... and self-preservation

Now, I don't know who made that question about Jesus Christ, but you. You. You gave me real fear... but also indirectly confirmed one of my headcanons, so thank you, I suppose.

I was bracing myself, waiting and hoping Thomas didn't say anything stupid, because Janus and religion have a super tight bond and one misstep can lead to me rambling for the rest of my life, all while throwing canon into the trash because no one can say anything wrong about the relationship Janus has with religion, not even Mr. Sanders.

But the answer was... okay. Harmless. A bit simplistic, maybe, but I can accept Janus saying that Jesus is cool for having followers and turning water into wine.

What really struck me the most was when he said Jesus is his style because "he refuses to die".

For me, that's the most important part of the video. You can take away everything else, because this is the only part that matters for me.

Why? Because this is the essence of self-preservation. Because, as I said in the past, self-preservation is that force that protects you from dangers, threats, even yourself. And it protects you from death. It's part of that intrinsic will to live that defines all living creatures.

So, since Janus encompasses this role too, it has always been implied (at least for me) that he's that force that will fight against death until the end, just to make Thomas live a little longer. In my headcanon, he literally refuses to think Thomas can die before his time, because he's built to not make this happen.

Hence why when I saw Janus putting such emphasis on the idea that Jesus refuses to die made me immensely happy, because it's (implied) canon. Janus refuses to die, because he will never surrender to death. Because it's his nature, to never surrender to it.

---

Deceit or Ego?

The snake telepathy part was fun when mentioned, then it was followed by the "memememe I'm gorgeous" part, which is perfect if you're the representation of Ego, a bit less if you're deceit.

Speaking of that, I think there's a bit of confusion in Thomas' mind regarding these two aspects. And since they're represented by two different Sides, the contrast is even more jarring.

Janus is confident and this is part of his personality. But confidence isn't repeating "me" in your head 400 times and telling yourself that you're gorgeous and handsome even when sitting still. This isn't confidence, this is Ego. This is something Roman could say to himself... and he did it, in the past. He looked at himself all the time, called himself gorgeous, asked if his makeup was okay because the prince's gonna slay, said he dramatically serenaded himself in front of the mirror. All these things are a constant reconfirmation of yourself and this is what the Ego does: it constantly reconfirms you're great and cool and gorgeous.

Confidence, on the other hand, doesn't need constant confirmations. If you're confident, you already know you're great, you don't need to repeat it yourself. You just do your things and if others criticize you, you shrug their reprimands off.

One example of confidence from this video? This part:

"What are my guilty pleasures?" Guilty pleasures? Why would a pleasure be guilty? I've got none of those. Indulge in your pleasures guilt-free, people: life is short.

This proves Janus is confident, WAY MORE than him repeating how cool he is. This is the tone he should've had for most of the video, not that "Oh, look at how cool I am".

Also because it may seem a paradox, but the more you repeat how cool you are, the less people will believe you. That's why people who constantly show off are perceived as weak and insecure: because they search for a constant reconfirmation they would probably never need, if they were truly confident.

---

All of the selfcare - and what else?

Aside from the things I already mentioned, the rest of the video is mostly made of advice like "your opinion is the only one that matters/others are less than you/don't give a shit about others".

I don't know if this is Mr. Sanders making a reminder to himself to not indulge in criticism too much, but okay, let's ignore it XD

These pieces of advice can all be traced back to another aspect of Janus' personality: the self-care one. The last canonical one.

And since it's the last, I can understand why Thomas latched onto it and made it be like 60% of the video. It's probably the part of Janus' character he remembers the most.

And it's the easiest too, along with the "sassy" aspect. Put them together and you get the sassy queen who tells you to relax dear, don't give a fuck about the rest of the world.

So I understand you, anon, when you say this is the best characterization in a while: it is, because it's based on the last canonical piece of Janus' character, mixed with the "sassy" aspect that developed more recently. Of course it seems more coherent with Janus' character, compared to him being drunk for an entire video.

But even if canonical, self-care is just an aspect of Janus' personality and it makes most of the video. The remaining part is a huge amount of Ego, which shouldn't even be here, because it's Roman's trait.

And the other aspects? Nowhere to be seen. No distaste for society, no cryptic language, no wittiness, barely any lie, barely any real confidence, barely any body language and zero foreseeing ability.

I know what you're thinking and yes, I said at the beginning that this video is clearly just a way for Mr. Sanders to reconnect with the character. So I understand why Janus' personality is like that and that there are mistakes or incomplete things. I am not blaming Thomas for trying.

I am writing this post, to remind you Janus' full personality. To remind you that he's not just "sassy wine aunt/self-care queen".

On the contrary, I think present Janus is exactly like his make-up: the traits are similar to the original one, but the aspects are too sharp. They should be here, they are part of him, but they're not in the exact shade or nuance to be him. They are similar, but off, because something is missing. And that something is nuance.

In the end, that's what this post is all about: nuance. Past Janus was more nuanced, because he was more than one aspect. Present Janus is less nuanced, because he's stuck between two aspects - which is a truly cruel irony, considering his entire thing is being a gray, multifaceted character.

My only hope is that, just like with the make-up, Mr. Sanders will find a way to bring nuances back into Janus' character and make him at least similar to who he used to be.

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Language Barriers

same anon as like 5 minutes ago, I remembered the fluffy prompt! Could you write a Sanders Sides DLAMPR fic (before they get together) where all of the Sides have different love languages? And they’re all trying to flirt in their own way, but the others keep misinterpreting it? A lot of TSS fic features the Sides having different love languages (and I’d like to think they do, in canon), but I’ve yet to see a fic that specifically focuses on that fact and describes the differences between love languages. Feel free to ignore, and remember to take care of yourself! – anon

hey I love love love love LOVE your writing! If you’re open to prompts rn, I’ve just reread your story "Idiots, Idiots, Everywhere" and it’s awesome, thanks very much, BUT. Are you willing to write a Sanders Sides fic where it focuses more specifically on all the Sides having different love languages? Bonus points if it’s DLAMPR (but platonic PR, this is an incest-free household) and all the Sides are like “…but he’s like this with everyone”. No pressure at ALL, but it’d be cool to see how you approach that. – anon

Read on Ao3

Warnings: none

Pairings: dlampr

Word Count: 3431

Or, five times the Sides misunderstood each other's love languages, and one time Thomas got fed up with it and decided to just...explain it to them with the efficiency they have when they're trying to explain something to him. Which is to say: it takes them a second to get it. The Imagination helps.

Physical Touch

If you were to ask anyone, they would tell you that Patton loves giving people hugs.

It’s the bane of some of their existences, they’d try to claim, and the others might just shrug and say that’s Patton for you. He knows his kiddos love it, at least a little bit. But he won’t lie, he does love a good hug. There’s just something so magical about how, out of all the shapes humans could have possibly been, they’re just perfectly designed to hold one another. Isn’t that just perfect?

Logan would probably say something about evolution and adaptation to the needs of their environment, or something, but he’s not gonna rain on Patton’s parade. Humans are hug-shaped, so they’re gonna hug. Besides, he’s not complaining when he’s working downstairs in the winter and he’s gotten too absorbed in his work and then a Patton-shaped heating pad just comes along and hugs him.

Patton loves hugging all of the Sides. Logan because he’s always so surprised by it, in a good way! He gets this soft little look that is almost on the edge of a smile, like he wasn’t expecting it but it’s the best possible outcome he never could have predicted. Or when he’s trying to comfort Patton and he hugs with undeniable certainty.

Virgil is also fun to hug, because he’s such a pouty-face about it. He snuggles up as much as any of them but he has to put on his mopey show first, just in case anyone’s watching. Virgil also gives the mopey hugs too, but then he makes himself just a bit bigger so he can wrap all the way around Patton. Which is the best.

Speaking of wrapping all the way around, Janus has six arms and he uses every single one of them. They get into competitions sometimes—not serious! It’s all for fun!—about who can surprise-hug each other the worst. Or best. Janus is currently winning from the time he managed to make himself look like the chair in the living room with a blanket over it; Patton sat down and boo!

Remus isn’t allowed to do surprise hugs, not after he accidentally tackled Patton into his Kraken’s pond and they had to spend the rest of the afternoon trying to get out of the pond. But Remus’s hugs are the kind that squish his soul right back into his body and ugh, there’s nothing better than that after a long day. Besides, it’s not like expecting Remus’s hugs takes anything away, he’s still going to squeeze him so hard he might not be able to breathe for a few seconds, but that’s Remus!

And then with Roman—Roman hugs the way every single knight from a fairytale should hug. He just makes you feel safe and precious and like nothing in the world could hurt you. It’s why Patton always sits next to Roman during scary movie nights, after all, even if he gets teased about it a little. Roman doesn’t mind.

So yes, Patton does love hugging all of them. But it doesn’t have to be hugging! It can be holding hands, or just leaning against each other, just as long as he can feel them and tell himself yes, they’re okay, they’re right here, I love them.

Because he does. He loves them terribly. Even if they think he’s just a big fan of hugs.

***

2. Quality Time

Virgil has the reputation of being the cat of the Mindscape for good reason. Not because he hisses at things that don’t cooperate—the other Sides are not excluded from this—and not because he spits up hairballs—it was one time, Remus, and it was entirely your fault—but because he has a habit of just appearing in the same room and hanging out for a while.

…alright, it’s not a habit, he does it on purpose.

Companionable silence really is the best way to go about things. You’re both close enough to talk if you want to, but each of them is allowed to do their own thing and hey, there’s another person doing their own thing too. Which is why it’s his favorite way of hanging out with Logan, especially when he needs to make sure that something gets done. He’s always down to affectionately bully Logan into whatever he asks him to make sure he does.

He does that with Remus too, but it’s not exactly the same: Remus needs someone to make sure he doesn’t actually destroy anything, and he’s more than happy to oblige. Especially since he likes to get a bit of a heads-up before a rampaging beast goes barreling through the kitchen at some ungodly hour of the morning.

If he’s never beating the cat allegations, Janus sure as hell isn’t helping. There’s a big window in the Dark Sides’ half of the Mindscape that is perfect for lying in for, oh, a few hours on end. Remus has many—too many, if you ask Virgil—pictures of the two of them just basking in the sun, dozing like they haven’t got a care in the world.

Virgil’s actual favorite place to sleep is with his head in Patton’s lap. Especially after he’s just finished baking, when he’s all warm from the oven and he smells like sugar and spice…Virgil will sit on the counter or the floor and listen to Patton talk about whatever he wants and then while the oven bakes, he’ll fall asleep right in Patton’s lap. He even gets first dibs on whatever just got made.

Roman makes a game of it. He’s the Prince, every good Prince needs a rogue to work with. They trek all over the Imagination, having adventures, defeating monsters, it’s the perfect mix of Roman’s quests and Virgil’s need to be a creepy little shit in every dark corner he can find. Being with Roman even makes boring council meetings fun, because he gets to terrify the idiots that they’re just gonna fight later anyway and he gets to spend time with Roman.

He doesn’t care what he’s doing, not really, just as long as he can spend time with them. He just…wishes they would understand that sometimes.

***

3. Words of Affirmation

Logan is no stranger to impostor syndrome, but that doesn’t mean he has to allow it to plague those he cares for. Understanding something to be true on an intellectual level and feeling the validation that comes from hearing someone else voice it are two very different things. The other Sides are each remarkable in their own right. They deserve to hear it.

Patton is kind. He does not say that lightly: kind people who choose to be kind because they know how difficult it is are not individuals to be trifled with. Patton makes the conscious choice to try and be better every single day. He is earnest and sincere, sometimes painfully so, but he does not allow himself to be dissuaded by obstacles. How could Logan not want to express his admiration?

And Roman…oh, Roman is a wonder. There is so much that goes into his work that often goes unnoticed, or underappreciated, and it is a crime that Logan too often finds himself on the wrong side of that line. Roman is clever and funny and has a work ethic that, truly, rivals Logan’s own. For every slight he makes, however unintentional, he tries his best to make up for it by telling Roman in no uncertain terms how honored Logan is to be part of his creative process.

Remus is an entirely different story, no pun intended. Remus is unabashedly and unapologetically himself, and as such is a marvel to behold. He cares not for the sanitization or reduction of anything in his work, and so Logan does his best to follow suit. Remus is who he is, and it is beautiful.

He tells Janus he’s beautiful too. And not once is he lying. The first time he did it, Janus laughed in his face, at least until he realized Logan was telling the truth. He then didn’t see Janus for an entire week. It ended when a little snake plushie appeared outside of his door in the middle of the night with a tiny note that just said thank you. He tells Janus he’s beautiful every chance he gets now.

Virgil is his little alley cat. Perfectly fine to approach on his terms, but will let him know with no uncertainties when he’s getting a little too close. It doesn’t help that Virgil is quite fun to tease, even if all he’s doing is giving him compliments—true compliments, mind you—and watching in amusement as Virgil curls up into a ball with his hood pulled down over his ears as if that could hide how red they are. He’s not cruel about it, of course; he stops the moment Virgil appears genuinely uncomfortable and there are certain topics he doesn’t go near. But Virgil can’t always hide his little grin and so on it goes.

He’s quite happy to shower them with his words, he just…doesn’t know if they’d believe him if he said I love you.

***

4. Acts of Service

Words are difficult. There is so much ambiguity to be found in even the most basic of sentences, and when it comes to matters like this, Janus prefers to take as few chances as possible. Whoever coined the phrase ‘actions speak louder than words,’ Janus definitely owes a drink for how spot-on it is.

Whenever Patton needs a hand in the kitchen, he’s always the first to volunteer. He can do up to three things in the time it would take another Side to do just one, after all, and he’s had enough experience cooking for the troublemakers (Virgil and Remus) to know how to get around most of their pranks. And how to get them back.

Logan, bless him, has a tendency to overwork himself at the best of times. And in doing so, he gets these terrible knots and cramps in his neck and shoulders from hunching over his desk for hours on end. It might not be the most polite of things to practically blackmail his way into giving Logan a massage, but the poor dear always falls right to sleep so he mustn’t mind too much.

Remus and his delightful menagerie of creatures often need more than their fair share of attention. He had to pester Remus into getting him a raincoat and muck boots that could withstand the acidic slime, but weekend mornings found them strolling cheerfully through pens and cages and paddocks, tending to the bizarre flock. Anything to make the chore more of a fun activity and less of, well, a chore, when Remus really doesn’t suit stressed-out frowns as well as manic grins.

Virgil has a terrible habit of not asking for reassurance when he needs it. Janus regrets the part he played in making it that way. So, no matter how small and stupid Virgil may think it is, whenever he asks for help, Janus gives it. A tug on his cloak or a soft please will have him do anything from turn the light in the hallway on to checking the poor thing over for wounds after a brutal nightmare. It took long enough for Janus to re-earn that trust, he’s not going to lose it if he can damn well help it.

Out of everyone in the Mindscape, only Roman truly appreciates his love of theater. Sure, the others are game to help out here and there, but when it comes to the art of make-believe, Roman is the proud owner of Janus’s ‘yes-and’ partnership. The two of them make all sorts of stories together, from villains and heroes to morally grey adventurers, to simple fairytales and old plays. Roman needs someone else to help him play the roles and Janus is more than happy to play with him.

Perhaps one day, he might be able to reveal that everything he does for them, he does because it’s them, but for now, he’ll happily play the role they expect of him.

***

5. Gifts

Roman and Remus do not, in fact, fight over who gets to give the most presents to the other Sides.

Instead, they fight over whose idea they work on first.

For Logan, Remus’s self-writing pen narrowly won out over Roman’s proposal for a never-ending notebook, if only because said pen squirted ink into Roman’s mouth before he could finish his argument. They ended up giving both to Logan at the same time, but the pen was decidedly on top and did its own little celebratory wriggle when Logan used it for the first time.

Remus nearly challenged Roman to a formal duel when it came to designing a heat lamp for Janus that wouldn’t run the same risk of burning out the electricity in their section of the Mindscape. They managed to agree on everything up to the design on the lampshade. Roman said it should be a yellow snake, curled up and sleeping, and Remus wanted it to be a big leaf that Janus could lay under like he was actually outside. The compromise was eventually reached over many hours of almost bloodshed and now the sleeping snake under a leaf is a staple in the corner of Janus’s room.

Roman cleverly proposed Virgil’s weighted blanket while Remus was being crushed under said blanket, leaving not a lot of wiggle room until he had to agree. Of course, he promptly fell asleep and cuddled Roman into a pile of goo, so technically they made both the blanket and the plushie at around the same time. Virgil still brings the little skeleton to movie nights.

Patton gets their presents one after the other, because you need one to understand the other’s context. A rebreather designed to slip on over the person’s face just like any other face mask, to filter out particulates and allergens. Something that could be worn for up to two consecutive hours before it needed to be recharged.

The other present was a box full of kittens.

”Ro?”

“Yeah?”

Remus pushes his goggles to the top of his head and looks over the desk. “Do you think they’ll ever get it?”

Roman sighs, closing his notebook and leaning back to stretch. “I don’t know, Re. I love them, really, they just…”

”Don’t realize.”

“Yeah. It’s okay, though. We’ll get there eventually.”

“Of course we will. Hand me that wrench, would you?”

“The one that’s covered in guts, or the one that’s made out of foam?”

“The foam one. I need to whack this thing but I don’t wanna hit it too hard.”

“I’m not gonna ask any more questions.”

***

+1: I Love You

”Hey!” Patton rises up first, clapping his hands. “Oh. I’m the only one here.”

“Only by a moment,” Logan says as he joins him. “Is Thomas here?”

“No, I just got summoned by—well, I thought it was Thomas but he’s not here.”

“Whoa, hey!” Virgil appears on the staircase. “What’s going on? I was in the middle of watching someone.”

“Don’t you mean ‘something?’” Remus appears, covered in slime and cackling. “Ah. I see.”

“I’ve got it,” Roman says, rising up and spraying his brother with something that somehow manages to dissolve all the goo without staining or spraying anything else. “There. Now maybe you’ll think twice about surprising Uma when she’s feeding?”

“Oh, I’m gonna do this so many more times!”

”I felt the exasperation from my room,” Janus sighs, appearing, “what’s Remus done now?”

“Why did you assume it was Remus?” Janus just looks at Logan. “Fair enough.”

”Now that we’re all here, what is this about?” He looks around, frowning. “Where’s Thomas?”

“That’s weird, is he not the one who called for a meeting?”

“What’s that?” Virgil reaches out and picks up a piece of paper from the coffee table. “‘Each one of you needs a card, find the matches.’ What cards?”

“Here.” Logan picks up something that fell when Virgil picked up the paper. “There are only five of them, though, and six of us.”

“What do they say?”

“Let me see…one says ‘Physical Touch,’ one says ‘Acts of Service,’ one says…oh, I see.”

“I don’t,” Patton says, “can you share with the class?”

“Wait, wait, I think I know what this is, is one of them ‘Quality Company’ or something?”

“‘Quality Time,’ yes.”

Roman nods. “It’s the Five Love Languages.”

“Thomas doesn’t even speak Spanish!”

“No, no, Padre, not literal languages, it’s…it’s the ways you express your affection for someone. How you tell them you love them. There’s five: physical touch, acts of service, quality time…”

“‘Words of Affirmation,’” Logan continues, reading off the other cards, “and ‘Gifts.’”

Virgil hunches his shoulders. “So what, are we supposed to pick one?”

“I believe the intention of the exercise is to…select which one is our love language.”

Janus huffs. “Why? What does Thomas have to gain from doing something like this? And where is he?”

“Maybe he’s not the one who summoned us.”

“Well then who did?”

“Maybe if we do the thing we can find out.”

Janus sighs, peering over Logan’s shoulder and squinting. “I guess this one’s mine, then.”

“‘Acts of Service?’ Very well. I suppose I’ll take ‘Words of Affirmation.’”

“Can I have the touch one?”

“Certainly.”

“Twins get ‘Gifts,’ obviously,” Virgil mutters, “which means I get the…time one, or whatever.”

Logan hands out the last two cards and they stand there for a moment, waiting for something to happen.

Nothing does.

Patton looks back down at his card. “Wait, did you say these are how we tell people we love them?”

“That is a simple definition of this, why?”

“Because you guys do these with everyone!”

There’s a pause. Logan adjusts his glasses. “Well, I can’t speak for everyone, but…yes, I do indeed give you all words of affirmation, because, well…”

“Aww,” Virgil says, “do you love us, Logan?”

Logan coughs, blushes, and adjusts his tie. “I believe that is a logical conclusion, yes.”

“Aww!” Patton squeals. “I love you guys too!”

”So whoever set this up knew that we were all trying to tell each other that—“ Roman starts.

“—and needed to hammer it into our heads what was happening,” Remus finishes.

“Well,” Janus sniffs, even as a smile threatens the corners of his mouth, “how dramatic.”

Virgil tugs on the strings of his hoodie. “Yeah. How dramatic.”

There’s another pause.

Roman coughs. “Uh, this seems like a good a time as any, um…Remus and I put together a festival thing in the Imagination for everyone, if you want to…if you want to come and see it.”

“It has everyone’s favorite state fair stuff,” Remus sands, “and there’s supposed to be a northern-lights kind of thing after it gets dark.”

“Can we cuddle?”

“Of course.”

“Will there be food?”

“Your favorite, shadow-ling.”

“You two are so thoughtful,” Logan says softly, “I would love to come.”

“I can get the good blankets from the closet,” Janus offers, and everyone grins, “should we meet there in ten?”

“Oh, this is going to be so much fun!”

The Imagination is just happy they finally sorted it out. Now, to give the six of them a group date they’ll never forget…

General Taglist: @frxgprince@potereregina@gattonero17@iamhereforthegayshit@thefingergunsgirl@awkwardandanxiousfander@creative-lampd-liberties@djpurple3@winterswrandomness@sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes@iminyourfandom@bullet-tothefeels@full-of-roman-angst-trash  @ask-elsalvador @ramdomthingsfrommymind@demoniccheese83@pattonsandershugs @el-does-photography @princeanxious@firefinch-ember@fandomssaremysoul@im-an-anxious-wreck@crazy-multifandomfangirl @punk-academian-witch@enby-ralsei@unicornssunflowersandstuff@wildhorsewolf @thetruthaboutthesun @stubbornness-and-spite @princedarkandstormv  @your-local-fookin-deadmeme @angels-and-dreams@averykedavra @a-ghostlight-for-roman @treasurechestininterweb @cricketanne @queerly-fluid-fan @compactdiscdraws@cecil-but-gayer@i-am-overly-complicated@annytheseal@alias290@tranquil-space-ninja @arxticandy @mychemically-imbalanced-romance@whyiask@crows-ace @emilythezeldafan@frida0043 @ieatspinalcords @snowyfires@cyanide-violence@oonagh2@xxpanic-at-the-everywherexx@rabbitsartcorner @percy-07734@triflingassailantofmyemotions @virgil-sanders-the-gay-emo@cerulean-watermelon@puffed-up-bees@meltheromanstan@joyrose-fandomer@insanitori@mavenmush@justablah65@10paradox10@uhhh-hi-there-i-am-nervous@cutebisexualmess@bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti@ultrageekygirl

[loganslowdown4]

The Sides Need A Nice Day

All The Details Part 3!

Roman getting offended that the Prince wouldn’t be that stupid or mean and is maybe just trying to always do the right thing?

Well, that wasn’t personal or on-the-nose or anything, damn 😩

*coughSVSReduxcoughcough*

💙🖤🖤💙

*adds to ‘want to read’ on Goodreads*

*puts audiobook on hold on Libby* 👀

(Has anyone read this? Is it good?)

I feel like Thomas might have let someone else edit this shot hahaha

But yes, the return of the spider! 😂🕷️ (Maybe it’s Marcus??) 👀

💛🖤💛🖤

Ya boi is still standing in his spot 👀💛🖤

This is… this is just his spot, isn’t it?

Lol I like to point this out every time because when it actually happens in canon we can all be like ‘called ittttt’

Also! Janus is stupidly efficient and I love him for it. The fact that he comes to the light side of the mindscape, determined to one up the others doing a ‘stupid trend’ and not to be a part of the group or anything 👀, doesn’t know where the pens are because he barely spends any time there…

And then proceeds to be the best of all of them by giving Remus exactly what he likes 😂

💜🖤💜🖤

Virgil likes stories that end in brave acts of selflessness, huh?

This is him making up for not being there during redux, I know it—

💚🖤💚🖤

This idiot look at him 💚🖤

He’s genuinely so upset that it’s not something more disgusting 😩😅💚🖤

💛🖤💛🖤

This last line feels… pointed?

Like it may be that it’s a thing people say after they do a friend a favour/give a gift

But Janus doesn’t ever just do things, does he?

Maybe it’s to keep his partner in crime happy?

Or it’s an apology… for insinuating he was the evil twin?

It just made me pause because he said it in that way he does when you know he’s speaking with double meaning. Not necessarily lying, but not telling the whole truth either.

For the 1000th time I will gush about how much this show/these characters give me SO MUCH to talk about 😄

❤️🤍❤️🤍

Realizing that the reason Roman freaks out so bad from Virgil scaring him is that Virgil probably just APPEARED in his room without warning or preamble, no rising up, no knocking, just HERE pick a card

I’d be pissed too 😂😂😂❤️

You have to wonder if Virgil has ever in his right mind done that before or Roman and Virgil are definitely becoming friends now, in their own special way lol

Also why WHY is Roman always in the bathroom when we see him not in front of the tv to start with?

Like he’s always in there when he does incorrect quotes with Remus too. Like they need special neutral ground to talk to each other that’s not the living room…

Idk I getting away from the text with that theory, but it’s funny that it keeps happening

This episode was too much fun! 😂😂😂

Go back to Part 1!

[sanderssidesthehouse]

omg hi can you do janus? he's my absolute favorite and I see you have thoughts

Janus my beloved.

(size of the circle indicates how much I vibed with it/how confident I was about saying yes)

Ok, ok, I know what you're thinking, "Ace why the fuck would you trust Janus?" Bc I love him, next question. No actually, I have reasons. Number one, he's competent, number two he's a giant dork and I'm annoying enough I'd be able to tell when he's telling the truth.

I feel like "Done dirty by fans" is pretty self explanatory. It used to be a minefield trying to find a fic with Janus in it where he was portrayed in character and not an "unsympathetic" villain.

Also, my dear wife Janus with the long hair is the physically hottest side, I am not taking concrit, you cannot change my mind. (Hey, hi, you walked into trans guy territory, if you can't draw the connection, I can' help you.)

My favorite thing about Janus is that he's a liar about being a liar. Not that he doesn't lie, but calling him 'Deceit' is a lie. Sure, he manages that function, but it doesn't have to be his position, if that makes sense. There are several other things he could be called, most of which don't have a negative connotation. I'm not positive his job is necessarily something else, like how Roman is also passion and the ego, but he's called Creativity, so Janus's main gig could very well be lying, but he could be called something else that denotes the purpose of lying, and considering the other things he's shown to manage, such as trying to get the others to STOP lying (looking mostly at you, Patton), lies don't always serve him and his purpose. Are we picking up what I'm putting down? I'm tired and this paragraph is long.

I wrote a post here about how my boy is tragic. Also here's my post about how much I love unreliable narrators which is supplementary to the previous paragraph. Janus is really primed to be a fav of mine. (Not beating out Logan but he's a close second.)

We don't have to go into why he's just like me fr I think that would be depressing on all counts and uncomfortable for everyone involved. Also we can ignore the "I would let them make me worse" category, he's probably the only side I'll check that off on, psychoanalyze me if you want to.

To finish out, I want to circle back around to Janus being lovable and trying so hard and being a massive dork. He's just a snake boy! He gets so frustrated with everyone being stupid, which, relatable, but he's still trying so hard to help them! He wants good things for Thomas which means helping sort these idiots out. I want to see him doing better. I want to see more of his Shrodinger's union with Patton and his exes energy with Virgil, bc I'm messy and I think it's fun. And can we please get a main line video where he and Remus interact? I need it for sick and evil reasons (kicking my feet while giggling).

As always, anyone and everyone can feel free to tag on with their thoughts!

[naminethewriter]

You're Not Alone

Chapter Four: All Together

Masterpost | First | Previous | Next | Ao3

Remus is finally here! This is the fourth chapter to my gift for @edupunkn00b for the @sanderssidesgiftxchange! Only the epilogue left now 🥰 Enjoy!

Summary: Logan, Janus and Remus are celebrating their first Christmas as a married couple but a snow storm strands both Janus and Remus elsewhere, leaving Logan home alone. Knowing that the situation will trigger their husband, Janus and Remus need to find a way home.

Content Warnings: Reference to Flashbacks and Panic Attacks

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Logan and Janus hurried over to the door and threw it open. In front of them stood their husband, Remus, in full skiing gear, his hood off and glasses pushed up into his hair. His fist was raised to continue pounding on the door. As soon as he saw them, Remus grinned.

“Logie, you’re okay! And Jan-Jan made it home, too!”

“Indeed I did, but how did you? The airport’s over an hour away!” Janus exclaimed, staring at his husband in disbelief.

“I skied!” Remus declared proudly, holding up his skis with a grin.

“Have you gone completely insane?! That was far too dangerous!”

“Oh yeah? How did you get here then, huh? I don’t see your car!”

“That- That doesn’t matter right now, you –“ Janus sputtered but was interrupted by Logan pulling him back inside and making room for Remus to enter as well.

“Both of you stop. You each did something incredibly stupid but you’re here now and Remus needs to get inside.”

“Thank you, Logie bear, I knew you would understand.”

“Do not start with that, I am furious with both of your disregard for your own safety,” Logan huffed. “Janus, please get a few towels, I’ll help Remus undress.”

“Well, aren’t you forward, starlight?” Remus giggled and wiggled his eyebrows at him. Logan gave him an unimpressed glare, while Janus disappeared down the hallway.

“I will not engage in any sexual activity with you until I am completely certain that you are not suffering from hypothermia.”

“Boo!” Remus pouted. “And I’m fine, it was a good workout! I’m actually sweating more that I’m freezing.”

“Considering the possible symptoms of hypothermia, that is not as reassuring as you think it is.”

Remus just shrugged, not in the mood to argue further and letting his husband fret over him. They worked together to get Remus out of his wet clothes and Logan had to admit that Remus didn’t seem to be the least bit cold or hypothermic. Still, he had Janus towel him off while he brought the wet clothes to join Janus’ to dry. When he got back, Remus was already wearing fresh clothes and making grabby hands at him from the couch.

“Where’s Janus?” Logan asked him as he let himself be pulled into Remus’ lap.

“Making us more tea.” Remus buried his face in his husband’s shoulder, he had missed him and Janus dearly during his stay in Germany. “You smell good. Love it.” Despite being used to Remus’ antics, Logan couldn’t help but flush.

“Thank you?”

“Y’ welcome.”

They stayed like that, cuddled together until Janus returned with three steaming cups on a tray.

“Remus, have you contacted Roman yet?”

“Oh shit, you’re right!” Remus suddenly lunged towards where he had put his phone on the coffee table, almost sending Logan to the ground, but he managed to just keep his balance. Before he could chide his husband, Remus had already started a video call with Roman.

“So, you are alive, you giant oaf!” was the first thing Roman said as the call connected. Janus sighed and sat down next to Remus and Logan slid off his lap, sitting on the other side.

“Sorry, Ro-bro, but I literally just got here.”

“You seriously went all the way back to your house?! You’ve been gone for over four hours!”

“Well yeah, but I got there, didn’t I?”

“You are the most idiotic, reckless person I have ever met. How have you managed to survive this long?! No, better yet, how have I not died of one of the ten thousand heart attacks you have caused me over the years???”

“Well, it’s good to see that you haven’t lost your sense of dramatics over the holidays, Roman,” Janus commented dryly.

“You! As if you’re any better! Do you know how worried Remy was about you? Huh? Or Patton? And all you send us is ‘Got home. Talk to you later.’ That’s it?! No explanation, just a fucking text message, Janus!”

“I needed to take care of Logan; he was my priority!”

“I was fine –“

“No, you weren’t.”

“Still, I was fine as soon as you came here, so we could have –“

“I’m not here to listen to you fight!” Roman interjected loudly through the phone. “I just want you to remember that there are other people you need to contact.”

“That is a valid point, thank you Roman,” Logan said before either of his husbands could object.

“We could just add them to the call,” Remus shrugged and moved to do so without waiting for the others’ opinions. Janus didn’t stop him, just sighed.

“This is going to take a while, I fear.”

~~~

Janus turned out to be right. Remy and Patton, as well as Emile and Virgil who happened to be home and present for the call as well, lectured Logan’s husbands for a whole half hour before the topic moved towards the twin’s vacation. But because his husbands and him were exhausted from the day’s events and all eight of them would meet up the next day if the weather allowed, Logan cut the call short after that. Everyone agreed that they should get some rest and wished them a good evening.

When Logan glanced at the clock, he could hardly believe it was only 4pm.

“I need to prepare dinner,” he realized out loud.

“Oh, hell yeah, I was looking forwards to this!” Remus cheered, hugging Logan enthusiastically.

“Yes, I would love a good meal right about now as well,” Janus agreed. “Should we help you, dear?”

“I appreciate the offer, but may I propose that the two of you take a shower first? I believe you have warmed up adequately and we can rule out hypothermia as a concern. That will also give me time to set up the kitchen the way I need it and you can join me there afterwards.”

Janus reached over Remus to grab Logan’s hand and established eye contact with him.

“Are you sure you’ll be alright if we leave you alone for that long?”

Logan wanted to wave him off, say that he was fine but one look at not only Janus’ but also Remus’ expression told him that he needed to show them how confident he was that he would not have another breakdown. So, he squeezed Janus’ hand and smiled.

“Yes, I am certain. Knowing you are in the house as well as keeping myself busy with cooking will prevent another flashback from occurring.”

Janus studied his expression for a moment but when he found no trace of a lie, he smiled back and nodded.

“Okay, then we’ll leave it to you. Let’s go, Remus.”

“Uh! Can we bathe together?” Remus laughed, chasing after his husband. Logan chuckled, watching them go before heading into the kitchen to start on the planned dinner.

~~~

Everything was great before and during the meal. Logan could prepare himself and the kitchen properly before his husbands joined him and cooking together turned out to be very fun. Remus even followed all of his instructions without trying to ‘spice things up’. The entire time the kitchen was filled with either soothing chatter or comfortable silence. Remus told them about his time in Germany and Janus and Logan filled him in on what had happened at home.

It was after they finished dinner and the following clean-up that Remus got very restless.

“Bescherung!” he called, excitedly jumping up and down. “Time for presents!”

‘Bescherung’ is the German word for the gift giving part of the Christmas festivities and happens on Christmas Eve rather than the morning after. In Germany it’s not Santa Claus that brings the presents, but the ‘Christkind’, the Christmas child. It’s a tradition that Janus and Logan had adapted to after they started dating Remus, both finding it to be calmer and less stressful than doing it on the morning of the 25th.

Neither of them were morning people after all.

“Not that I am opposed, but do the two of you even have presents prepared?” Logan asked. Janus usually kept his at Patton’s until the day of, so they were most likely left in the car and Remus is known for preparing gifts last minute, so he probably bought them in Germany and left them with Roman.

“I don’t have all of them, but I made sure to bring at least one for each of you!” Remus grinned proudly.

“As did I,” Janus spoke up. “It felt wrong to not have something in case we did manage to all make it home after all.”

“Great! Then let’s get to it! We all give each other one gift now, the rest we’ll do tomorrow.”

“Very well, I suppose that is fair.”

“Yes, something small since Remus and I couldn’t transport the big things.”

“I will fetch something appropriate for each of you,” Logan agreed and left for his study, where he had ‘hidden’ the presents for his husbands. Both Janus and Remus would be able to find them easily if they so wished, but they had learned over the years that it brought Logan great joy to see their reactions on the day, so they refrained.

Logan is the last to return to the living room a few minutes later. The wrapped packages before Remus and Janus were quite a lot smaller than his, and there were smaller presents he could have chosen, but he was too excited to see their reactions to his choices to wait for tomorrow.

He placed them on the coffee table and took his seat on the couch next to Janus. Remus had opted to sit on the floor, shaking excitedly.

“Me first! Please!”

Janus chuckled.

“Go ahead, Muse.”

“Funny you say that, because you two were the muses for this!”

Remus handed both of his husbands two slim, very light packages. They carefully opened them, and Logan could only stare at the cloth in his hands while Janus gasped.

“Oh, Remus, they’re beautiful!”

In his hands, Janus held a new set of gloves. Black with a yellow, two-headed snake embroidered on the back. It’s the logo Janus had created for himself in school. Without touching, Logan couldn’t be sure of the material, but he believed that it was either silk or something similarly soft.

While Janus hugged Remus and said his thanks, Logan’s eyes wandered back to his own gift. A tie, as black as Janus’ gloves, but with the Tardis embroidered on it. Dr Who was his favorite TV show of all time, a sentiment he shared with Remus.

“Thank you, Remus, it is wonderful,” Logan commented with a smile, showing the tie to Janus who had returned to his place on the couch.

“And you haven’t even seen the best part!” Remus grinned. “Turn it around! I technically wanted to do that for both of you, but I couldn’t really stitch anything on the inside of Janny’s gloves without it showing on the outside, so I gave up on that. I could add it to your hat, though.”

What Remus was referring to was two small, stitched additions to the inner folds of Logan’s tie. On one side was a date, their wedding date to be precise and the other a sentence that read: Jan and I love you. Always.

Logan’s eyes started to water. He tried to say something, to express how much it meant to him, but the words wouldn’t come out. Instead, he stood and tackled Remus into a hug and kiss.

Remus caught him easily and held him close until he let go of his own.

“Thank you.”

Logan’s voice broke, still crying. Remus smiled and wiped his tears away.

“Of course, starlight. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“Well, now I feel left out,” Janus spoke up from the couch, arms crossed and pouting in a very obvious fake way. Remus cackled, gently pushing Logan off of him to reach for something.

“Sorry, Snakey. I have a peace offering for you if you want?” He held out a plastic bag with something brown in it that was immediately snatched away by Janus.

“You’re forgiven.”

“Honey waffles?” Logan guessed, knowing they were Janus’ favorite.

“Sure are. Authentic Dutch ones too. One day trip over the border mainly to get them. I got another two packs with my other luggage.”

“If that’s so I might be able to get one at least.”

“I wouldn’t count on it,” Remus giggled, watching Janus happily munch on the confectionary. Logan watched as well for a moment before giving Remus a kiss on the cheek and moving back to the couch.

“If you’re not too busy eating, wanna continue, Janny?”

Janus blushed, swallowing the last remains of the waffle and putting the rest of the pack aside. He cleared his throat before speaking which threw Remus into a giggle fit.

“It will be tough to follow you, but sure.”

The packages Janus handed out weren’t the same shape as Remus’ had been. Logan’s was similar to the one he had received from his other husband, though a bit heavier, but Remus’ was bulkier.

Pulling the wrapping away, Logan found a set of bookmarks, all on the thicker side, and as he looked through them, he found different constellations, from the Zodiac to less well-known ones as the Hydra. Turning them around revealed text that described the location of the constellation, as well as when it is best seen in their state and where it originated.

“Thank you, I will make good use of them,” he said, smiling at Janus who nodded, satisfied.

Remus, meanwhile, had ripped his gift open, read the little card attached to what was inside and then immediately shoved the object in his mouth, chewing on it happily.

“And I suppose that is it’s intended purpose?” Logan asked.

“Indeed. A chewing bracelet that is a bit more inconspicuous that his other chewelry.”

“Well, he seems to be enjoying it immensely.”

“Yes,” Janus hummed fondly. Logan smiled, watching for another moment before he pulled the bigger gift of his two into his lap.

“This is for you, Janus. Please be careful with it, it is fragile.”

“Thank you, darling, I will be.”

Since Remus seemed to still be focused on his new stim toy, Logan watched his other husband open his gift instead of handing out the other one. As he promised, Janus carefully pulled open the taped folds of paper, rotating the heavy thing in his lap with a steady hand. Soon he revealed a beautiful, glass chess board.

“Oh, this is just wonderful!” Janus exclaimed, drawing Remus’ attention. “What beautiful craft! And the pieces!” Janus had opened the drawer that contained the figurines and examined them closely.

“Uhh, fancy!” Remus said, leaning close but, wisely, refraining from touching.

“I love it, Logan. Thank you,” Janus said, earnestly. Logan blushed.

“Well, there is something more on the bottom. It seems, Remus and I had similar thoughts this time around.”

Janus raised a brow and carefully placed the black bishop he had been examining back into the drawer, closed it and then slowly turned the board around. On the bottom was an engraving of each of their names and their wedding date. Janus traced the letters and smiled fondly.

“Truly a perfect gift, thank you so much, darling.”

“I am happy that you like it,” Logan said, blushing. Having his gift be called perfect made him feel very good.

“What about me!” Remus demanded, practically buzzing on the floor. Logan chuckled.

“Of course, Meus. Here you go.” He handed him a gift bag that Remus immediately dumped out over his lap. It was an assortment of different color hair dyes as well as a card that Remus snatched up quickly. His eyes widened as he read it.

“You’re serious?!” he exclaimed, staring at Logan.

“Yes.”

“You’ll let me dye your hair? Any color I want?”

“Any color we can agree on. And only one.”

“Fuck yeah!” Remus cheered, jumping up and throwing himself between his husbands, pulling both of them against him. “I love both of your gifts so much, thank you! I can’t wait to see what else will come tomorrow!”

“I agree,” Janus hummed, adjusting his position to be more comfortable. “You were both very thoughtful and I am so happy to be here with both of you.”

“So sappy!” Remus teased before pressing kisses against Janus’ hair, ignoring his protests.

“While I can’t say I am happy with how you two got here,” Logan interrupted, making both of his husbands freeze up, “I couldn’t imagine spending this day without both of you. Thank you.”

“This calls for a cuddle pile!” Remus laughed, joyfully, and pulled both his husbands even closer. It wasn’t the most comfortable position, but there was nowhere Logan would rather be.

[asksuccubussides]

What if you were an asexual succubus, wouldn't that be fucked up or what

Chapter 15

Masterpost of chapters

When supernaturals speak in their native languages it looks like this

'Emiles an angel!?' Remus hadn't even gotten the chance to flap his arms around before Remy corrected him.

"Was"

Remy leant back against the bed pillow and let their body sink down into the worn out mattress while the other demon bounced up off the bed to pace back and forth. His tail flapped rapidly up and down.

Soooooo' Remus drew out the sign 'How long has..Was E- M- I- L- E- an Angel?'

"Girl are you stupid or dumb!? Since he was born...Duh?"

'Is that why' Remus reached out to poke at Remy's unnaturally bright white hair but they flinched away.

The ceiling fan in the murky hotel room turned on on it's own and let out a low but constant whirring sound just as Remy pinched the bridge of their nose and sighed.

"I think you can put two and two together and not make it into five okay girlie-" They saw Remus start to sign something but interrupted him by placing their hand on top of his knuckles "I don't like enjoy talking bout it. I met Emy in like the 1910's and we were pining fucking idiot friends for like 50 years or something and then we like kissed and made love and Hell and Heaven somehow like INSTANTLY knew and" They motioned for their hair "Happened. Emy's wings got taken. His halo got shattered. My hearing was taken. All that shit. Not a good time!-"

'Then me and Ro-Ro came'

Remy softened into a smile "Yeah....Then you and Roman came"

He let out a silent gasp and flapped his elbows around 'EMILE HAD WINGS!? OF COIRSE HE DID!!! GROSS ANGEL SHIT!!'

"Hey now nothing bout my Emile being gross! The point! The point is like that Hell knew!! The moment me and Emile got together The Knew!! We couldn't run or like hide from being punished! I dunno what line you cross with a human to get punished but girl the second you cross that line-"

'I am already being punished' Remus signed 'Why not keep going against Hell'

Remy smacked their lips together while pointing their finger "You got a point..You got a point" They saw his tail quickly start to wage and added in a haste "But the kind of point that ends up with you like dead!" Remus' tail was still waging "And probs Roman dead too!"

Remus' mouth clammed up and his hands turned stiff.

The older demon moved their long pale tail around his shoulders and leant in to press a kiss to Remus' forehead. They kept their face close to his while continuing to speak.

"If you like this Janus human guy I like sooo totally support you girl but you have got to like figure out a way to have your human and stop The manager from punishing anyone but you for it 'cause girl you've been stalling for 3 fucking months. You can't keep doing this. Roman is not doing good. Either you figure out some way to threaten The Manager into letting you and Roman go or girl I am gonna have to make you go have sex with that human and then kill him! You got it!? Actually I know you got it cause I know you're not totslly fucking braindead!"

He didn't sign any response at first, all he did was blare at them before faltering and signing

'I really like him'

"Yeah duuuh. So you said you...uh..like feed off of him? By just kissing him? And he wasn't even horny or nothing!? Are you sure he wasn't lying? Y'know Humans do have the like brain capability to lie right?"

Remus hadn't even had the chance to talk back when Remy continued while their brow lowered into deep thought.

"We just gotta figure out how you work! Or how your feeding like works or whatevs. We should go out on the street right now and make you make out with some humans"

'Or we can?' Remus signed.

"I'm not a human"

Remus knocked at his brain 'Use the goo up there. Which has better chance of working, kissing you or a random little human?'

"Giiirrrlll, you got a point" Remy sat up on the edge of the bed and took off their sunglasses before waving their hand towards him. In response he pulled his hair because he knew his mustache already always annoyed Remy whenever they cuddled, they didn't need his locs tickling at their skin as well.

All though he honestly did not think it would work he still leant forward right by the bed and let his lips meet the other succubi's. He had seen them kiss Emile plenty of times and no trace of the way Remy acted then was present now, instead they kept their eyes open the entire time waiting to see his expression change in any way.

As the kiss went on he started to imagine eating worms out of boredom and knew it was time to pat Remy on the shoulder to tell them to move back.

"No feeding?"

'Maybe we have to try with tongue' Remus suggested.

"OH Girl NO! I know yOU! You just enjoy the slithering slimy feeling of tongues in your mouth for NASTY reasons!!-"

'I enjoy imagining snakes are climbing into my mouth! Nothing wrong with that!'

"But we're trying to figure out your feeding shit! Not indulge in your weird snake fantasies! You felt nothing?"

'As nothing as the stomach of a starving goat'

Remy let out an annoyed groan and started picking at the flailing paint left on their fingernails.

'I think it is a Janus thing'

"That's exactly what I don't wanna hear girl!" Remus' tail sunk down and hung unmoving down to the floor but Remy didn't notice as they checked the time "Ugh I better get back to Hell. I just like- I don't know what else to do to like help you! If there's something I can do tell me!"

He shrugged.

Remy switched to signing 'I want to help you and I get that you like Janus but hes just a human! Hes fleeting! I know youve only been alive for like a totalllly short time but trust me hes gonna be gone in like a second! I think you should like enjoy your time with him and fuck him and kill him and get this over with, and then I, Emy and Roman can help you find another human that you will feed off of! he can even be british! And named Janus! We will figure out how you work okay!? We won't leave you in the dust girlie'

They glanced to the clock on the wall that was behind by a few minutes and stood up from the bed. They pressed their finger against Remus' chest as they repeated.

'You just gotta kill him'

'If I kill him I have to go back to those mind melting boring meetings' Remus cracked up into a toothy smile.

'Dont joke about that shit right now. You are coming back to Hell'

'So I can hear Roman brag about how many more humans hes gotten over me'

Remy sent him a look before in silence putting their shoes and jacket on. They leant towards the hallway mirror and checked their hair while saying.

"I paid for the room for like a few more nights if you don't wanna stay overnight at that like library anymore. But only a few more nights. Y'know what you gotta do girl"

Remus left them space by the door and listened to them recite the phrase needed to open the door to hell that he could no longer say. The door creaked open and both of the demons glanced at each other as the stark white hallways of Hell became clear.

"It's worth a try" They said gently.

He wordleesly agreed and reached his hand out over the threshold, over into hell. But his fingers were stopped by somemthing unseen. It was as if a glass wall was holding out. No matter how he tried to budge or poke or punch he couldn't move over the threshold.

Without any struggle Remy moved their foot across the treshold but before fully walking through they pulled him into a quick hug before signing.

'Youve thought about it right? Youre stuck on Earth. Romans stuck in Hell. He hasnt feed in 3 months'

The door swung closed as soon as they had stepped through and Remus was left standing in the murky hotel room. The first thought he got was that it was damn right Roman hadn't gotten to feed in 3 months. He hadnt gotten to feed properly his whole life! Why shouldnt she feel the same hunger he has!

But, and he took a few steps back to sit on the bed and pulled his tail close to his chest, he knew logically that eating the minimum amount to keep him going wasn't the same as starving for three months.

If he had to starve for 3 months he would cease to exist after a few weeks, he knew that. He knew how the body decayed. Starting with the organs taking from the fat until it shifted to the brain eating off the organs until the heart started to erode the brain away in a last ditch attempt to find nutrients. Until his body stopped just like the clock on the hotel room that went a few seconds further behind every day until it would eventually stop.

He didn't even have any body fat to keep himself alive from so his organs would erode almost immediately. Roman had always been more plump than him but even then he had to imagine 3 months would...what kind of damage....

Remus shook his head around and forced himself to keep reapeting the images of rotting flesh and decaying meat in his mind. He tore away pages from the notepad left on the nightstand and found a pencil in some drawer before hunkering down on the floor and beginning to calculate how long the body of a demon could last when starved.

--

For the entire lesson with Logan all Remus could focus on was the clock on the wall ticking away slowly as Logan turned one page of his book after the other.

The pen in Remus' hand broke between his fingers and he jumped in his seat. His tail moved up to rub his horns to soothe himself and it was enough for Logan to glance up from his book.

"Is everything going well with Janus?" He spoke in English to help the younger demon learn it faster.

Remus dragged his fingers through his hair while shrugging. One of his fingers got stuck in a piece of gum that had burrowed down near his scalp.

"I would kindly like to remind you that I requested that you would inform me after you had seduced the human so we could converge and discuss before you kill him. Do you remember that?"

The demon was half zoned out and busy chewing at his hair while he nodded.

"Good. it's very important" Logan's eyes got drawn back to his book but when he saw the demon choking and spitting up a clump of his own hair he sighed and asked "Is something bothering you?"

Remus took his notepad and wrote 'Im worrying bout my brother'

"Your brother" His eyebrow raised slightly along with the inflection of his voice. His eyes darted away for just a second before he pretended to cough "Yes, Of course, You're brother. I see"

The succubi began to write down 'Can I leave? Me and Janus-' But he didn't have time to finish before Logan continued.

"You must be aware that even if you kill Janus you will not get your voice back, are you not? You ate a human and got Punished for it. No matter what you do that will not be reversed"

Another string of hair got stuck between his teeth. He nodded. In his head he corrected 'Parts of a human'. That damn human probably didn't even die from it.

"And I am not sure if it is the same for your brother or not"

If Remus didn't know better he would think Logan was trying to convince him not to go through with the murder. The older demon leant back in his seat and clasped his hands together.

"Have you thought about why you were asked to kill janus?"

'Becuase Jan is smart. Hell wants to make sure he is on our side because his brain is so big and strong and good' He scribbled out.

"There are a lot of smart humans, Remus, not all of them are ordered to be killed" He mindleesly ran his finger against his wedding ring "Would you like to hear my theory?"

He nodded.

"I believe that Janus was picked completely at random. You were behaving poorly before you got sent to earth, correct? You weren't meeting the averages?"

Remus grimaced but nodded.

"I think the higher ups simply wanted to see if they could make you do as told. In this case I suppose they are levearing your brother against you. The human happened to be the one who was picked"

He sunk in on himself 'Why couldnt they have picked a more boring human. Why did it have to be janus'

--

"Something bad is going to happen. I can feel it" Virgil's leg was bouncing up and down so fast his that phone screen became nothing more than a shaky blur as his fingers continued nevertheless to tap at it.

At nearly the exact same time Remus knocked at the apartment door to Virgil' and Janus' apartment. Even through the door he could hear frantic breathing and gentle shushes but the sounds were quickly hushed as soon as he knocked. It took another minute or two of waiting by the closed door before he heard Janus' voice yelling.

"The door is open!"

Remus decided the best course of action was to headbutt the door open and as he slammed his way in while laughing he saw Janus and Virgil sitting close together on the couch with Jan having put Virgil's hand against his neck.

The emo was wearing overalls that were unlike his usual dark attire and when he saw the demon he quickly rubbed his palms over his eyes to wipe away any tear stains.

"I gotta go" He mumbled at the same time he got to get his jacket and bag.

"Want me to save some leftove-"

"I'll eat at work"

"Break several legs" Janus waved Virgil off as he stormed past the demon and closed the door behind him. Storming here refering to how he was as moody as a cloud on the horizon.

"Did he get another pole stuck up his ass" Remus let his tail trail behind him on the floor as he went up to lean his arms on the couch.

Janus in turn moved closer on the couch so he could rest his head against the demon's forearm "I don't think he ever quite got the first one unstuck. It was just a close to anxiety attack. Him not getting a full blown attack is good. Also he has the night shift so we totally won't be alone for the enttiiirreee night darling"

"except for the ghosts"

"Of course"

Remus let his head fall down against Janus' and he kissed the skin between his dread locs "Why do you two do that weird neck thing by the way?" He mimicked the way Virgil held his fingers against Jan's neck.

"Oh that? It's an ancient ritual meant to keep Vivzie from turning into a sleeper agent" He said sarcastically "But really it's just a way to relieve his anxiety. Viv got this strange fixation on thinking I will die at any and all moments and feeling my pulse helps him"

"The dead birds don't help with the whole fear of death thing, huh"

"Those have actually lessened ever since I met you. I think you smeal so bastardly that no birds or animals even want to die in the vicinity of you"

Remus squinted "Glad to be of help?"

Janus lightly tugged at his mustache "Won't you sit down"

The demon complied by rolling over the couch seats and falling flat with his head right into Janus' lap. He spun around so he could look into the human's dark brown eyes.

"Though I do imagine the fact that I was near death once right before Vivzie met me couldn't have helped either. I totally don't ever worry that Viv befriending me so soon after the car crash did some irreperable sort of damage in his psyche and gave him an anxiety disorder. Totally not. Never ever do I worry about that. It might be hard to belive but this" He motioned for the scarred half of his face "Is how I look after years of healing. I looked like a bloody slasher villain as a kid-"

"WHAT!?" Remus' eyes went huge "YOU USED TO LOOK EVEN COOLER!?"

Janus couldn't hold back a snort "Sure dear. Want to see the pictures?"

"YOU HAVE BABY PICTURES!?!?!"

"Well more like kid pictures....Actually not that many. Adoption facilities don't actually take that many photos for fun believe it or not. No one is getting paid enough for that. But I believe we have some school photos"

The demon laid on the couch as his babe went and rummaged around forgotten boxes to try and find the yearbooks. As he waited he noticed the fake cobwebs hanging on the wall and since the humans hadn't moved in that long ago it couldn't have been a forgotten halloween decoration. That must have just been Virgil's idea of home decor.

"Thought I was flogging a dead horse there for a minute" Janus muttered as he came back

"CAN I SEE THE HORSE? PLEASE!"

He remembered his date wasn't british and waved it off "I found the yearbook"

He made the demon make place for him on the couch and smiled when Remus instantly threw his arm around him. His tail was wagging so fast it nearly made the couch shake.

"This is from Year 1 I believe" The photo showed a class of tiny 5 year olds all wearing similar uniforms. It didn't take the demon long to recognise Janus, he stood out not only as one of the only two black students but also because of the bandages covering half of his face.

He flipped the page to the photo from Year 2 and it was nearly the same class, still with Janus standing out just as much. The half of his face now looked like a raw wound, giving off a pulsating deep red.

"I knew it! You did look cool!"

"I looked like a James Bond villain"

"Nothing wrong with that!...I think....Don't know who that Bames Jond is. And" Remus smiled "You were so tiny. Like- Like a tiny little...Little human..I never got that"

Janus didn't say anything, he simply pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek and burrowed himself closer to his date. (He assumed silently Remus meant he had had to grow up quickly)

Not that he had literally been created as an instant adult. Not that Remus had ever missed or even thought about what it would have been like to be a child. But seeing Janus so small, with untied laces, band-aids on his knees and round plump cheeks, made him imagine it.

"Do you think we would have been friends if we knew each other as small humans?"

"Oh certaintly darling. I think you would have been my lovely henchman on the playground"

"That sounds nice.."

In the photo a blond tuff of hair was barely visible behind Janus and when he showed the photo from Year 3 that blonde hair was still sticking up along with the eye of a student that was hiding behind him.

"Who's that? A Ghost?"

"Vivzie"

Remus scoffed "But that ghost is blond!! Virgin has his stupid black bangs!"

"Yes because those are definitely real"

When the demon continued to stare at him with a confused look he added.

"He dyes his hair"

"His hair dies? Like a cancer person? Did it regrow as black like a lizard tail?"

He took it as a joke and laughed lightly "Yes exactly. That is also how half of my locs became brown and I presume how your friend's hair turned bright white"

The information slowly sunk in. Remus had always assumed humans with colorful hair must have been born that way (human biology was strange) or maybe their hair changed when they got Punished just like theirs did. maybe that was why he saw so many medium sized humans (teens) with colored hair, because they got Punished by being put into the ground or being detained.

He grabbed his human by the arm and shook him around "I WANT THAT!"

"Right now?"

"RIGHT NOW!! BEFORE THE EARTH IMPLODES! BY METEROITE!"

"But I was thinking of opening up some wine and getting cozy.." He pretended to wipe away a tear.

Remus leant in and kissed him briefly, which made Janus let out a highed pitched sound "Later. Hair first. Now where can we find these hair dying stuff?"

"Darling we should really have a discussion on whether we kiss suddenly or after asking because" He was fanning himself "That was sudden. And to answer your question, the store"

"LETS GO! LETS GO!"

-

"I think i would like some white this time, Then if I braid my locs I will look like a chess board!"

"Great camoflauge..For when the zombies come. I think I want hmm-"

"Allow me to guess. Hmm, I see no other option for you than...red"

Remus gasped "NO! NOT STUPID RED! Green obviously! Pretty nice gorgeous puke green!"

"I know dear, I know"

The worker behind the delicatessen was lining up a cut of meat and brought out a butchers knife. Remus' eyes fixated on the knife as it sliced down right through the middle of the meat, splitting it in two. He imagine Janus' head laying there instead. Imagined his blade cutting down into-

He shook his head and leant down to place his arm around his human's waist and whispered "Wanna shoplift?"

Janus rolled his eyes before smirking "I'll be the distraction" He murmured into his ear, so close his hot breathe touched against his skin.

All the human had to do was walk within eye distance of the cashier while pretending to take a closer peek at the candy display and the worker instantly tried to not so subtly stare at his scarred skin grafts. Meanwhile the demon used his tail to move one can of hair dye under his shirt after the other.

For good measure he let his horns flash such bright red the store lights began to flicker before he took Janus' hand in his and rushed out of the store. He speed up on the street until he fully took off into a run still with his human right behind him. he squeezed his hand and got the urge to use his wings to show him the sky above-

But that was Angel shit.

Remus stopped in his tracks and saw a bird crash into the store window on the other side of the street. It fell to the ground and it's wings continued to flail for a few more seconds before it's small body went completely still.

He heard Janus laugh while catching his breathe and let his eyes go from the dead bird.

"Kith?" He asked and as soon as Jan even started to nod he was already pulling him into an embrace to kiss him.

He closed his eyes and focused on the new warm sensation of feeding. He felt Janus' hands grab ahold of the back of his tanktop and twist the fabric around the tips of his fingers.

It tasted like a delicious dinner. Like a finely made stea- The butchers knife flashed before Remus eyes and he took a step back. "Wanna uhh wanna get to the dying?- The dying of hair?"

Janus took his hand again and nodded "That was fun! Vivzie never lets me shoplift. He thinks the pigs will get me for a single stolen egg"

-

"That's goopy!"

"Stop moving or your face is going to be green as well"

"Like an alien!"

Remus sat only in his undies and his choker on the bathroom floor with Janus right behind him. The human was wearing plastic gloves and slowly massaging in the green dye down to his scalp. So far he had had to pull out several leaves, a dead worm and a full chicken wing bone from his hair.

"Want to hear about this uhh like psychological study I read about recently!? It's fucked uP!"

"Sure"

Janus let Remus go on for 5 entire minutes about the standford prison experiment while listening like he hadn't heard about it many times before just because Remus was flapping his hands around so happily while ranting about it.

"And then they had to end it at Day 6 already!"

"Crazzyyy" Janus said in his snarky tone "You've heard of the Milgram experiment?"

The demon turned his head so quickly he nearly got dye all over his nose "NO! What's it about!?"

"How about you go and look that up while I dye my hair"

"But I wanna help"

Janus rolled his eyes "I won't risk my beloved sweater to dye my hair. I am Going to have to undress upwards at least and I'm not sure-"

"Were you planning on wearing a shirt if we fucked?"

"I- Well- I hadn't planned that far" Remus giggled "Don't laugh! You Bloody skunk muppet! I'm going to dye your mustache green too! You will be walking around looking like a leprechaun!"

Remus gasped and covered his mustache with his hands "You wouldn't!"

"I sure would!"

His giggle attack stopped and he tried to look more serious "But if you're not comfy I will go and entertain myself I guess. I can look through the Virgin's garbage and find blackmail dirt on him!"

"Thanks" Janus' eyes flickered back and forth across the tiled floor as his date began to move to stand up "No- But- But you might just have a tiny miniscule point somewhere. I mean. It's not that I don't feel comfortable with you here it is just. It's totally not like I have meber been so close to anyone but Viv before and it doesn't make me nervous in the slightest. I don't think anyone besides him and my doctors have even seen me shirtless"

"I can stand in the corner like Blair Witch! No seeing unless you tell me you're okey with it!" Remus suggested.

"Dear that sounds like a lovely plan"

The demon gave him a cheery smile before standing up and turning his back around so all he saw was the washing cabinet. He heard his human move about to drag his shirt off but zoned out from it when he noticed if he looked a bit sideways he could see himself in the mirror.

He had nearly forgotten about the white streak right at the forefront of his hair until now. Even as Janus had put the dye into every part of his hair that white streak still stayed. The rest was a nearly neon green. Except that.

He wondered if Roman had it too-

"I think you can turn around"

Janus interrupted his train of thought and he blubbered out some nonsense string of words while turning around. The first thing he noticed was that his human had put all of his black dreadlocs up into a bun while the dyed brown ones stayed hanging down to his shoulders.

"Oh your hair! So cute! Makes me wanna gnaw on it!"

He snickered "Darling I love how that is what you notice first"

"Oh! Right" He moved his eyes down to Janus' chest and blurted out "That's it?"

"What? Disappointed I don't have D cups"

"You were hyping it up so much I thought you had like a secret robot arm or like a third nipple! That's just" He sat down next to Jan on the floor and put his hand against his chest "More of you"

He noticed there was a slight color difference between the skin on his right arm and rest of him. It wasn't like the scars on his face but there were patches of slightly lighter brown along with bumps here and there.

Jan noticed where his eyes were going and explained "It's easier to graft skin onto arms than onto a face"

"It's so hot. I love your skin and grafts and jiggly titties" He smacked one of them lightly "And- And tummy and your human uneven skin and you not having horns and your lighting bolt scar strech thingies and the hair right here" he touched along Jan's happy trail "And you're so hot!"

"I hear that every day" He said sarcastically to try and downplay his blushing. Ideally he wouldn't have people comment on his scars or grafts at all but having someone gush over them was certaintly a nice change of pace.

Remus moved in for a kiss but Janus held up his hand so the kiss landed squarely into his palm.

"Nuh-uh darling. You will get green all over me. Patience patience"

The demon sulked beside him as he put white dye on the locs that had previously been dyed brown. A consistent thumping noise went on for several minutes.

"Do you also hear that or has the goverment implanted something in me" Jan snarked.

"Must be rats fucking in the walls" Remus replied, knowing fully well it was him smacking his tail into the floor out of impatience. His stomach was growling.

"There!" The dye had all been splattered on "Now I believe we must wait at least 30 minutes to let the color sink in before we rinse it off. Feel like watching something spooky or campy? Or both"

The demon rubbed the tip of his nose against the other man's "I wanna watch medical docs and make out!"

"Paattience darling"

Janus put on a murder mystery show and pulled out an entire notebook to note the evidence for who he thought the murderer was. Usually he wrote down Remus' comments as well but the only thing the demon could focus on was him.

His eyes were etched into the human's soft dark skin, at the vein barely visible along his neck.

Something cold slipped down his lip and he realized he was drooling.

"Stop giving me those puppy eyes" Janus said as he slipped his finger under his date's choker to pull his face close.

Remus met his kiss like a dying man in the desert met water. He clammered his hands around the nape of Jan's neck to hold him even closer.

He kissed so hard that Jan fell over on the couch and laughed against his lips. Remus moved his legs on either side of his stomach and leant his chest down against the human's to keep making out.

It was as if for the first time in his life he felt level headed from finally eating enough.

Even when Janus panted and pulled away to catch his breathe Remus kept littering kisses against his neck, down to his shoulder and chest. Until his human pulled at his hair and he went back up to kiss his lips.

"Good boy" Jan murmured.

His horns began to grow brighter and brighter as he feasted. His heart beated faster and his blood ran hotter. He felt the sensation of his organs pumping through the new energy at the same time as he felt the sensation of Janus' plump wet lips and his just as wet slippery slithering tongue and he-

"OW!"

Janus pushed him away and pinned himself to the corner of the couch while holding his hands over his lips.

The demon reached out his hands but they stayed hovering in the air "Wh-what?"

"You bloody bit me!"

He moved his hand aside and a wound, small but still clear as day, could be seen on his bottom lip. A piece of skin had been ripped off and Remus realized the skin now was stuck between his teeth.

It tasted delicious.

A few droplets of blood slid down to his chin and Remus was quick to lick it up "I'm sorry"

"Just- just warn beforehand. I know you're freaky and all that but I've barely even thought about kinks, we can't jump into biting immediately. Definitely not letting you give me head today though if you're in such a bitey mood" The alarm on his phone went off indicating it had gone 30 minutes "I'll go rinse my hair first. It takes ages for my locs to dry anyway"

Remus parsed his lips and knew he was supposed to say something flirtatious. Maybe ask for them to shower together. Maybe ask if he should help. Maybe kiss him again.

But his mouth clamped shut. He desperately wanted to hold onto the taste of Janus. He didn't want that putrid taste of Lust to permiate down his throat and ruin it.

The butcher's knife flashed before his eyes. The bird flying into the window. The tv was still on in the background, the detective was revealing that the culprit was a woman who had murdered her own twin.

Janus left to go to the bathroom and the demon stayed behind with his toes dangling off the edge of the couch. He picked at his skin until it started to scab.

He turned his head to the kitchen cabinet in the corner of the living room and with his eyes blurry from being zoned out he got up and took quiet steps towards it. His tail reached out and grabbed the largest knife and dropped it in his hands.

He pressed his ear to the door and heard that the water was still running as he touched the doorknob and realized that the door wasn't locked.

Just as he turned the knob the water stopped and he froze.

A few more seconds passed before the door opened right to his face and Janus stepped through with a bathrobe wrapped around himself.

The human looked up at him with a surprised look before his eyes darted to the knife in Remus' hand and he flinched back.

Remus' eyes darted to it as well as if he was surprised he was even holding it.

"Can- Can you help me cut my hair" He sputtered out and held the knife out towards Janus.

Janus relaxed and carefully touched his finger against the tip of the knife to lower it "Honey usually people use scissors for that. besides you still have to rinse your hair before that"

He stayed standing in the doorway with his eyes wide open and without saying anything for long enough that Janus had to ask.

"Dear, Are you feeling okay?"

"Remy- My friend Remy said my brother's...Not doing good"

"I see. Viv alos cuts his hair when he's having a hard time" Janus lightly pinched Remus' stomach "I'm glad having Remy over made you eat a bit more at least"

Remus looked down and realized his stomach was actually fuller than usual, his fingers even looked less skeletal and when he brought his hand up to scratch under his eye he felt his cheekbone less than normal.

The human took the knife out of his hands and instead brought his hand to Remus' back to guide him closer to the shower "I'll go and grab the scissors while you shower"

The demon nodded and immediately pulled off his underwear to which he could Janus actually let out a screech of surprise. He put his hand over his heart while overly dramatically fanning himself with the other.

"Okay! Apparently I will go and grab some sunglasses as well so you won't have any idea what I'm staring at!"

He closed the door behind him but Remus could still hear him continue to babble to himself through the wall.

-

"Does this please you my liege?" Janus held up the mirror so Remus could see himself.

He had trimmed Remus' hair so it was less like an entire myrcelium network growing out of his scalp and more like just an overenergetic afro....Well now that it was dyed a bright green it did look sort of like a radioactive bush.

"Yeah yeah sure it looks gereat" Remus replied, he had already began chewing at his hair again.

"I think you're hair is about 3C, want me to braid it? Give you box braids? Moon puffs? Vivzie's hair is so straight, he does let me braid it if I want to but he just ends up looking like Adele at coachella"

Remus moved to lay his head aginst his human's chest and snaked his hands around his arm "I just don't want this day to end" He mumbled into the fluff of the bathrobe.

"Well you'll be sleeping here, won't you? it's defnitely not like we can cuddle for as long as you want, not a chance that that is a possibility"

"Mhm...I'd like that"

Janus had a hard time even making Remus latch off of him for long enough so he could change into his nightgown (the demon stayed in his undies). They reheated some peasoup Virgil had made earlier that day and Remus kept snickering under his breathe about eating 'Pee soup'. They played 3 rounds of Clue and 2 of the Murder she wrote boardgame and Jan won every one because the demon was only preoccupied with coming up with the most elaborate murder ways.

The sun had gone down and so had the blinds on the windows when Janus yawned and rolled into the bottom bunk bed so that he was closest to the wall. He patted the place beside him while eyeing the demon.

Remus let out a happy screech while climbing down under the cover next to his human. He poked at his feet with his toes and moved closer to rest his face against Jan's warm chest. He could hear his steady heartbeat and all he could think about was the layer of skin followed by blood followed by tissue followed by fat followed by muscle followed by meat and finally bone, And how easy it would be to cut through all of it.

"Darling?"

"Mhm?" He shook his head around to get the thoughts out.

Janus twirled a loc of Remus' hair around his finger while letting his leg intertwine with his "I've been thinking.....We have gone on several dates, you eat dinner with me at my home quite regularly and we've kissed. We've even...well I've never been this intimate with someone. I would...It's totally not like I would want us to clarify what type of relationship we're in or anything"

The demon thought for a moment before tilting his head up to meet his eyes "I love you. Does that work as answer?"

"Well preferably a bit more detailed than that"

"I really love you! Like you could wear a pint of my blood around my neck! Or eat a bit of my flesh! That would be so romantic!"

"Oh it would!" He smiled as Remus kissed him and that same smile stayed as he quietly asked, nearly whispered to him "Would calling you my boyfriend work?"

Remus' tail instantly stood up and his horns turned a stop light red "I've never had one of those"

"I've had thousssands of them. They just keep appearing. Under my bed, in my cereal, crawling out of my tv" He went extra snarky when he was anxious.

"I think that could be nice. Being boyfriends. More than nice! Mega ultra cool!"

"Really?"

He nodded and Janus leant in to kiss him again. The demon felt the human excitedly kick his legs as he did so.

"Well then. I never imagined I would get a boyfriend this soon! Obviously I knew it would happen eventually since I am a snack! But already, Oh dear! See you tomorrow my darling boyfriend" He kissed the tip of his nose before snuggling further down under the cover "Good night"

"Good night. Tomorrow we can make pancakes and shape them into lil monsters"

"Sounds good" Jan mumbled, sleepyness slowly taking over his voice.

"And I can show you this horror film, it's not too gory, and I can cuddle you when it gets too scary"

"Mhmm"

"And then we can go to the park and I can chase dogs around while you drink bubble tea"

"Mhm..........."

Deep snores started to come from Janus and for a while Remus simply laid there and watched his chest slowly rise and fall. A bit of drool fell down his cheek and the demon reached out to wipe it away with his thumb, no reaction came. He was fully asleep.

Remus sat up slightly in the bed and took a deep breathe.

He had helped him shoplift. He'd made out with him. He'd been close to being intimate with him. Surely it had to count.

Surely Hell would accept it. He just had to-

He just had to protect Roman.

Humans die quick anyway.

He just had to keep the memory of how feeding off of Janus' felt close to his heart.

He just had to-

Remus picked up his pillow and pressed it against his boyfriend's face.

At first there didn't come any reaction. It wasn't until he pressed harder that the snoring stopped and got replaced with more labored breathing.

He didn't let up. He watched as his boyfriend still deep in slumber unconciously reached out a hand to try and move whatever was suffocating him away, but his hand simply fell down to his side again.

Only a few seconds more and-

A knife suddenly got pressed against Remus' neck.

"Move the hell away from him!" Virgil whispered into his ear.

The demon stayed still but that made the knife get pressed harder against his skin to the point that blood started to simmer out.

"NOW!"

[creativia10]

Punk with Lavender

Summary: Roman is ready to spend Halloween with his usual group of friends. He finds himself more surprised by their costumes than he expected to be.

Relationships: romantic Prinxiety, platonic brotherly Creativitwins, background romantic Dukeceit, romantic Logicality

Wordcount: 1010

Warnings: some mockery (but it's light-hearted teasing among friends)

Notes: Tuliptober Prompt 30-Oneshots

Part of one-shots. Will have more than one.

Set for Halloween

@transexualfoxprince

Based on @tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors Pastel/Punk verse

Roman smoothed out his costume and looked himself over in the mirror. He smiled. He thought he cleaned up rather well and made for a great dark prince if he did say so himself. The style looked like that of a typical fairytale prince costume. Except the color scheme was black and red. It fit him better anyways.

There was a knock on his door.

“Is his highness ready to come out yet?”

Roman snickered at Virgil’s unintentional irony.

“It’s funny you say that.”

Roman opened his apartment door only for his jaw to drop when he saw Virgil.

Virgil smirked. Virgil made fists and posed.

“Oo, look at me. I’m punk Roman. Totally a tough guy.”

Virgil was dressed like a punk. He was all in black. Roman didn’t think he’d ever seen Virgil lacking so much color. And he was wearing Roman’s jacket, a clothing item Roman let him borrow more on purpose now. He wore a mini skirt over fishnet stockings unlike Roman’s usual leather pants though. Still with boots though, just a bit more angular. The only thing that matched Virgil’s usual aesthetic, was his lavender-colored hair.

Virgil was still preening at Roman’s reaction. Roman blinked a few times.

“You don’t look completely like me,” Roman said. Virgil rolled his eyes and gestured with his head. They started walking out.

“Yeah, I thought it would be more fun this way.”

He shyly looked up at Roman.

“And uh, you look good too. Even if you couldn’t get a good roast in from your costume.”

Roman let out a little huff and put his arm around Virgil.

“I was perfectly fine with just looking good. Especially for you,” Roman said with a wink. Virgil shook his head.

“Idiot. You don’t have to do it for me.”

Virgil grumbled but leaned into Roman anyways. Roman hmmed.

-

The poetry café has been their group’s meeting spot anyways. The cafe didn’t officially have a Halloween event going on. But, it had become an unofficial tradition to dress up and hang out there around the spooky day anyways.

Apparently this year, Roman was not in on a group coordination effort though.

Remus was also dressed like a punk, but with neon green to replace Roman’s typical reds. He too smirked at Roman.

“Hey Ro, do I rock leather better than you? I bet I look so tough. Oo all this black totally means I’m extra and special.”

Roman rolled his eyes. “I think your neon exterior ruins your point.”

Janus hmmed.  His style was closer to Virgil’s current one. Janus wore a dark purple but with a leather skirt, and spiked heels.

“It is fun to see who could be intimidated by this though,” Janus added. Remus cackled and nodded in his agreement.

“Why did you all find it necessary to mock my style tonight?” Roman asked.

“Not everyone,” Logan said.

Roman looked over. Patton giggled. He was wearing a pastel blue sundress, the only one in pastel this time for some reason, which was an odd sight. He also had on blue converse. Patton’s hair was still dyed turquoise though, and his piercings were still in. Patton grabbed the ends of his skirt and spun around with a giggle.

“Oh, I love dressing so differently today! I feel like I look so cute! No wonder you all love to dress like this.”

“I wouldn’t exactly say cute is the correct descriptor for them usually,” Logan said. Indeed, the usual pastel wearers, Janus, Remus, and Virgil seemed offended.

“But uh,” Logan coughed, “You certainly do.”

Roman cooed at them with a smirk, getting a glare from Logan at his efforts. Remus mimed barfing in the background. Logan was the only other one who didn’t seem to be a part of this style-swapping scheme though. He was dressed as…a teacher maybe? Logan dressed like a professional, including a tie.

Janus gestured to the style swappers. “First it was just Virgil who wanted to, he thought roasting his new boyfriend was a good time. Something I can appreciate. Then Remus wanted to join as well. I thought the style sounded fun so I joined of my own volition. Patton didn’t seem to realize the intention was mockery and just wanted to have fun.”

Patton gaped at them.

“Of course, I’m not making fun of you! If anything, I’m honoring your look.”

Logan adjusted his glasses. “Yes, I did not understand it myself. But, it is apparently in good fun.”

“Speaking of, why did you choose to dress in that?” Remus asked. Logan huffed.

“It is different than my usual getup.”

“Yeah, but why a teacher?”

“It was different enough. I didn’t want to put too much effort into this when it is merely for going to our usual venue. I’m not exactly the costume type. Be grateful I dressed up for Halloween at all.”

 Patton cooed at him and linked arms.

“Well, I think it still looks good honey. I can see you being smart enough to be a teacher.”

Logan blushed a bit, “Thank you, dear.”

Janus and Remus made disgusted faces again.

Roman looked back to Virgil. “You’re the only one who went far enough as to change your physical appearance for this though, I noticed.”

“Ah, yeah.” Virgil brushed some of his now lavender hair back behind an ear and looked away.

“I thought it worked with yall’s typical punk aesthetic. Plus, I had kind of been considering getting it colored like this anyways. What do you think?”

Roman smiled at Virgil. He gently tangled some of his fingers into the lavender hair as he brushed it out of Virgil’s eyes.

“I think it really suits you.”

Virgil smiled and shyly looked up at him again.

“Yeah?”

Roman nodded, “Of course.”

Roman leaned in for a kiss.

“Alright lovebirds, let’s get going before yall start falling into tunnel vision again.”

Virgil rolled his eyes, but the two of them turned to join the rest of the group to head to their favorite venue. It should be a good Halloween.

[marvelmaniac715]

I’m a big fan of Thomas Sanders and his Sanders Sides theory, so here’s a short thing I wrote based on this YouTube comment I saw one time that suggested that since Patton and Janus are essentially parallels of each other (Morality and Deceit) maybe the two share similar traits such as a fatherly instinct when it comes to Virgil? For the sake of this piece of writing, just assume that when a new side is ‘born’ they start as a baby, okay? Thanks :). This is sort of Janus’s monologue when he meets Virgil for the first time, please be kind, I’m not the best at writing monologues 😂:

Oh, he’s opening his eyes, come quick, get the camera! What’s that Remus? Where did I leave it? It should be on the dresser, get it quickly, I don’t want to miss this moment.

Not so loudly, you idiot! Now he’s- oh, please don’t cry, sh, I know, I know, the world can be big and scary, but I’m here, you don’t need to be afraid. You’re safe, little one, you don’t need to cry.

What beautiful eyes you have! You’re too little to help Thomas right now, but when you’re big enough, he’s going to love you, I just know it. To be honest, I don’t know what type of side you are, only that you were born as a dark side so you’re not going to have an easy time making friends with the light sides, except maybe Patton because he’s too soft for his own good. They think that we’re bad for Thomas, that we’re trying to hurt him when really we’re just trying to protect him. That’ll be your job too, one day, little one.

Sure, logic, morality and creativity are valued traits for any human being, but we dark sides contain the facets of our host that he maybe doesn’t want to acknowledge but are still important factors in his development. I’m Janus, or, Deceit. My job is a little too complex for somebody as small as you to understand, but what I will say is that lying can be useful. Remus over there, the one eating the deodorant, is the dark side of Thomas’s creativity - his intrusive thoughts. He’s a little rabid, but he’s a very important aspect of Thomas’s personality nonetheless.

You’re certainly looking around the room a lot, huh? What are you searching for, little guy? You still don’t look too happy, maybe you’re paranoia or something like that? I still haven’t named you, don’t look at me like that, I need a second to think about it. Hmm, you’re still looking around the room, which suggests that you’re paranoia, or… what’s that word Thomas learnt about at school this week? Oh, that’s right, anxiety, thank you Remus. That must be your side.

We can’t just call you ‘Anxiety’ though, that wouldn’t be right. We need a new word, like, like… vigilance. That’s what you’re displaying by searching for danger in the room right now, isn’t it? Vigilance is a good word for you, but too long to be your name, let’s see what I can do.

Vigilance… ‘Lance’? No, you don’t look like a ‘Lance’. ‘Gil’? It’s getting better, but still not quite right. Vigil… Vir- Virgil. Wait, that’s it, we’ll call you Virgil. Do you like the sound of that? You’re smiling for the first time- Remus, take a photo- so that means you must like it. Virgil it is, then. Welcome to the world, little Virgil, you’re going to do incredible things.

[wolfprincesszola]

The Fate of the Marked Six Chapter 14

i like squad chapters. this isn't fully a squad chapter, but logan being a homie in this fr. as always, reblogs and likes are appreciated! enjoy <3 ——————– Summary: Virgil moves into a new town and meets Roman, a ghost that he promises to help in finding the unfinished business needed to pass over. However, Roman's past seemed to be deeply muddled with trouble, an uncurable disease that has started to affect a classmate, and a certain tight-lipped valedictorian. Friendships are made and Virgil finds himself thrown into a situation far more complicated and twisted than he signed up. Hopefully, with the help of his new five friends, he can find a way to bring peace to the town once and for all.

Trigger Warning: None

Content Warning: Swearing

<Masterlist>

<Previous> <Next> ——————–

Chapter 14

Remus woke up to the sweet smell of pancakes. He hadn’t smelt that in a while. Blinking awake, he found Janus smiling at him.

“Hey.” He smiled. “I love that smell. Where does it come from?”

“Logan’s parents. They made breakfast for us.” Janus remarked, handing Remus a plate of pancakes already covered in maple syrup, “How are you feeling?”

“Better.” Remus murmured, “I can’t wait to be out of this bed.”

“Good news, you’re being released today. I think the crystal helped.” Janus smiled.

Remus had to agree, as he had felt a lot better, even before he was sick.

“Mhm, hand.” Remus remarked through mouthfuls of pancake.

Janus rolled his eyes, “Chew with your mouth closed please.”

Remus grabbed onto Janus’s open hand, and felt the rest of his tiredness melt away, and relief flooded his vision as he saw the mark of pride above Janus' head. Although it was now confirmed Remus was the mark of death, he was still a bit worried that maybe Janus would become that mark.

“Alright, Porter, let’s get you up and at them. Janus has told me that you heard a prophecy come out of Caleb’s mouth. I need to hear it.” Logan spoke as he walked in, ruining the moment between the two best friends. The other members of the group filed in after Logan.

Janus quickly took his hand away from Remus, leaving Remus to frown, “Dude, kinda in the middle of something.”

“Oh, sorry he interrupted your lovey-dovey time.” Patton remarked, putting an arm over Logan’s shoulders. Logan brushed him off, turning to sit at a nearby chair.

“Ah, from what I heard, it’s the exact same as the one you said yesterday. It’s the six.”

“Well…I could figure it out last time. I can figure it out this time again.” Logan murmured.

“We already figured out some of them. I’m the mark of death, Janus’s the liar's breath, and your brother’s the favorite sun.”

“Understandable.” Logan nodded, “The special one, the hourglass, and the impasse…”

“Oh! I saw in a vision that the special one was me. I don’t know what it means, but yeah.” Patton chirped up.

“Then the hourglass and the impasse have to be between me and Virgil.” Logan murmured, staring at Virgil.

“What did it mean for Roman’s group?” Virgil asked.

“Well, the hourglass was the first one to fall into the hands of Caleb, and they had a power relating to time. The impasse was the most stubborn one…and the last one to resist death.”

“Well, both of you are pretty stubborn.” Patton remarked. “I don’t know who it could be.”

“You’re such an idiot.” Virgil rolled his eyes, “It’s clear, Logan’s the hourglass, I’m the impasse. Looking at patterns, he’s the one with the power relating to time.”

“That’s not good.” Logan breathed.

“Why?”

“That means he’s going to strike soon.”

“Huh?”

“I keep having visions, even through the crystal, and through the rosemary. Usually, that means something is coming up soon. The visions are of an hourglass. That’s all I can see.”

“Great.” Remus cursed, “What can we do?”

Logan stared at the boy, still in the hospital bed, “Unfortunately, nothing. We know as much as we know. There’s nothing else we can do, but wait for Caleb to strike, and have a bigger attack. Right now, all we can really do is live the lives of teenagers.”

“Are you kidding me? There’s nothing we can do? We just have to wait for him to attack and kill all of us?” Remus gaped, “I’m not letting you do that! I can’t lose any of you. I can’t lose Janus.”

“I don’t mean that.” Logan rolled his eyes. “I said we’re waiting…not that we won’t do anything.”

“I call bullshit.” Virgil snorted.

“We’ll build our powers.” Logan sighed, “That’s all we can really do.”

As silence befell the entire group, Remus couldn’t help but feel despair. Was there really nothing else they could do?

-+=~=+-

Remus looked up when he heard a slam of papers on the cafeteria table.

“Can I help you?” He raised an eyebrow, staring at Logan.

“I’m here to tell you four to audition for the Romeo and Juliet play.” Logan replied, giving each of them a flier in the stack of papers he had.

“And why should we?” Virgil raised an eyebrow. “I’m not that good at acting.”

“None of us are, but Mrs. Irnke is desperate, and it means it’s now Logan’s job to spread the word.” Patton snorted, “The drama club is suffering right now too. Please…we need you guys to join.”

“Yikes.” Virgil shook his head, “I would rather not.”

“I have been dragged into this advertisement.” Logan replied deadpanned, “Patton has promised me Crofter's jam in exchange for auditioning for Juliet. Besides, if my brother could be the lead in every play he had ever done, I must have some of that in my blood too. I am a Sanders after all."

Remus raised an eyebrow, “Really? You accepted the bribe? I didn't know you did that type of work."

“He promised me 3 boxes.” Logan adjusted his glasses, almost as if 

Virgil’s head shot up, glaring off to the side where there was air. “Ro!”

“What?” Logan raised an eyebrow before he blinked, staring at Patton, “Oh."

Roman, as much as he enjoyed being in Patton's presence, must have been salty about not being able to play in the performance. Maybe even jealous of Patton being able to be a part of the drama club.

"It's impractical for a ghost to perform in a play." Virgil rolled his eyes as he tried to ignore whatever the ghost had to say to him. "Besides, why would all of us audition for Romeo?"

"That's the best part. Mrs. Irnke is asking for more males to audition to be Juliet. We only have two girls in the drama club and they want to be audition in the roles of Benvolio and Mercutio." Patton grinned, "That means she's allowing anyone to audition for any roles, which means we may finally get a gay version of the Romeo and Juliet play!"

“I can't even argue with your enthusiasm."

"Patton's signing up for Romeo and convinced me to sign up for Juliet." Logan cleared his throat.

"I'll sign up for Juliet.” Janus smirked, almost staring Patton down in a challenge.

“If Janus’s auditioning for Juliet, I’ll audition for Romeo.” Remus shrugged, “It’s only fair because he’s going out of his comfort zone. Besides, we’re an unbeatable pair.”

“Uh huh.” Virgil snorted. "That's the only reason. Sure."

“Come on, if all of us are going to audition, you have to too, Virgil.” Patton pouted.

“Fine, 3 boxes of Crofter's Jam.” Virgil remarked before turning to the side, making a face at who everyone could only assume was Roman. "No, Ro, I'm not doing it just for you. You had your time beforehand and you can watch the others perform."

Patton got down on his knees to plea at Virgil and Logan rolled his eyes, "Get up, Patton. That will not convince him."

"Well, it was worth a try."

"Tybalt is a significant enough character and has the least amount of lines as I can see. Why don't you sign up for that?" Logan handed Virgil the sign-up sheet with an expecting look. Almost as if he was praying that Virgil would help him out and suffer with him.

"Alright, fine. I'll do it." Virgil sighed, "Just get off my back about this, Roman. You too, Patton."

Patton pumped his fist in the air excitedly as he watched Virgil sign his name. "Yay!"

"I will now go over to recruit more people." Logan nodded before leaving.

"Jeez, how many jars does 3 boxes hold?"

"15." Patton winced for the other responses.

"You're giving him 45 jars? That's overkill, Pat!" Virgil widened his eyes.

"You don't understand. It was the only way I could convince him!" Patton shook his head.

"I have to agree. I can't help but wonder how fast Logan consumes those." Janus shook his head.

"Hopefully, not all of them before we finish the play." Patton smiled weakly.

-+=~=+-

“Romeo and Juliet’s kinda stupid.” Remus snorted, staring at the script, “They couldn’t have simplified it? I mean, all we need to know about them is that Romeo was DTF any girl he saw. We should change all the terms into what they really wanted to say. They're just horny teenagers."

“It’s the process of keeping it traditional and classic.” Logan remarked, “I’d rather not be here either, but I was promised a box of Crofters' today.”

“Oh shut up.” Janus scowled as he was flipping through the script frantically, “You’ll ace it. I’m sure you read Romeo and Juliet as a child.”

“You’re right.” Logan shrugged, “I was 10.”

“Great, of course you were.” Janus rolled his eyes before turning to Virgil, “How are you feeling about this?”

“Hm? Bad.” Virgil shrugged, “I just don’t know how I’m supposed to memorize all this.”

“Just perform it like any horny teen." Remus remarked as he was reading his script upside down on Logan's couch.

“Right, and how do you suggest that?” Virgil snorted.

Logan rolled his eyes, “Here. Let me show you.”

He put the script down and stared into Virgil's eyes. Suddenly, the group watched as his apathetic gaze turned into one captivated by Virgil's eyes.

“Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, which mannerly devotion shows in this; for saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, and palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.” Logan recited, his hand on top of Virgil's.

Then, as soon as the look was there, it was gone and Logan walked back to his seat with a roboticism to his face.

Remus shared a look with Janus, one filled with utter confusion.

“How’d you do that? You looked like you were truly in love with me.” Virgil gaped, shaken by the look.

“Easy. I just pretended you were Crofters I’m supposed to get from Patton.”

At that moment, Patton walked through the door with a box, “Hey. Sorry I’m late. The king is picky about the flavors he wants.”

Logan’s eyes lit up as he walked over to grab the box.

“There’s the look again.” Janus snorted, as he walked over to try and snatch one of the jars.

“Don’t you dare. I earned these fair and square.” Logan smacked Janus' hand.

“Snake.” Janus hissed before trudging back to his seat next to Remus.

Patton smiled, turning to Virgil, "What part are you guys practicing?”

“The scene where they first meet each other.”

Patton made a face, “How’s that going?”

“Logan’s going to ace acting.” Virgil snorted, “He pretended he was in love with me by pretending I was a jar of Crofters. Do you know how committed you would have to be to getting that?”

Janus snorted, “Oh come on, it can’t be that hard. Here, let me try it.”

He stood up from his chair, going over to where Remus was also standing, and pressed their palms together. “Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.”

Remus smiled, spouting the next line, “O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do; They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.”

Janus blinked, staring at Remus, and Remus stared at him.

“This is the part where you kiss.” Patton whispered loud enough for everyone to hear him.

Janus shot a glare at the boy, and Remus chuckled, “Alright, Jan, calm down. He’s joking. I was waiting for your line.”

“Ah, I don’t know.” Janus murmured as he stepped away from Remus to grab his book.

“Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake.” Janus spoke, staring at his book.

“You really want them to audition?” Virgil raised an eyebrow.

“Hey!” Patton pouted, “They're trying.”

“Yeah, Virgil. Have some faith in me." Remus held his hand to his face dramatically, "I mean, if you can believe I can make a worse performance, try to believe that I'll do more than whatever your ghost friend can do."

"Oh no. Don't say that." Virgil shook his head.

"My brother does not take too kindly to wounding his pride." Logan spoke up as he had scarfed down a jar of Crofters.

"Napkin?" Patton offered.

"Thank you, Patton."

"We should get back to practicing though. I'll step in for Remus and show you the lines you need to practice!" Patton smiled as he grabbed his script.

As he watched his friends, he realized for the first time that he was worrying about something other than his illness. For once, he could pretend like he was a normal teen with the scariest problem being auditioning for the school play, instead of having to know he was risking his life every day.

-+=~=+-

“Next up, we have Remus Porter auditioning for Romeo.”

Remus took a deep breath, turning to the stage and smiling.

“Right, Mr. Porter, let’s get this started. You’ll be reciting Romeo’s monologue from the balcony scene, do you know where that is?”

Remus took a second, but then nodded. He looked out into the crowd to see his group of friends sitting in the back, silently cheering him on.

“Ready when you are, Mr. Porter.”

Remus looked at Logan, who was holding a sign that Patton had made to cheer him on. He looked at Patton and Virgil who were smiling at him. Then…he looked at Janus. His best friend Janus who was silently mouthing at him to do so good that it blows the judges away. His best friend Janus who had clearly made a small extra sign to cheer him on. His best friend Janus who was auditioning for Juliet. He knew he couldn’t let his best friend down.

“But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun. Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon, Who is already sick and pale with grief, That thou his maid art far more fair than she: Be not his maid, since he is envious; his vestal livery is but sick and green And none but fools do wear it; cast it off.”

Making eye contact with Janus, he smiled, letting the look of gratefulness to his best friend take over, “It is my lady, O, it is my love! O, that she knew she were! She speaks yet she says nothing: what of that? Her eye discourses; I will answer it. I am too bold, 'tis not to me she speaks: Two of the fairest stars in all the heaven, Having some business, do entreat her eyes To twinkle in their spheres till they return.”

Janus jokingly traced a heart with his fingers, and Remus smiled, reaching his hand out to grab it. “What if her eyes were there, they in her head? The brightness of her cheek would shame those stars, As daylight doth a lamp; her eyes in heaven Would through the airy region stream so bright That birds would sing and think it were not night. See, how she leans her cheek upon her hand! O, that I were a glove upon that hand, That I might touch that cheek!”

Forcing his eyesight away from Janus as he finished the monologue, he looked at the judges.

“Thank you, Mr. Porter.”

“Thank you.” Remus bowed as he turned to walk towards the back of the auditorium and sit with his friends.

“You’re lucky you were the last one. You had the support of all of us. I had no one.” Patton  pouted, upon Remus coming within earshot of them.

Janus moved his stuff so that Remus could sit on the seat that he reserved for him.

“You still did really well.” Logan shrugged, “Whatever is going to happen, at least you tried your best.”

“Wow, I never thought I’d hear the day that the Logan Sanders was giving out compliments.” Janus mocked.

“Not you.” Logan’s gaze turned stern as he glared at Janus, “You could’ve been better.”

“Thanks.” Janus' voice dripped with sarcasm.

Remus snorted, “Well…it was all thanks to you guys that I did so good. Thanks for supporting me.”

“Uh huh.” Logan nodded, “Right, now that the audition’s over, I need to supervise detention. Come on, Patton.”

Remus raised an eyebrow, “I thought you finished making up all your hours.”

“Ah, I just got three today from skipping third. The period I forgot I had with Logan, and can’t lie my way out of.” Patton sighed.

“Tell them what you were going to do.” Logan raised an eyebrow.

“I was going to do a prank on Logan.” Patton grumbled, “Come on, I don’t want to tell our friends about this. You already gave me the detention hours.”

Remus snorted as he turned towards the others, “Right, so…the play? What do we think about it?”

“Wish it would’ve been more modernized. I feel like this is really boring.” Janus shrugged, “But I mean, I’m really only doing this because I wanted to spite Patton. I wanted to maybe do better than Logan so that I could clown on him for being down bad.”

“I…can’t sit here and pretend that everything is fine when Remus could be close to dying.” Virgil sighed, “And I can’t sit here and pretend that Gray isn’t putting his ghost life on the line by trying to find where Caleb is because his goddamn Covington Entertainment building keeps moving. I just…why do we just have to sit and wait here?”

“I get it.” Remus murmured, “But there’s nothing else we can do. Unless you suggest we try to enter the area first.”

“No. I’d rather not risk your lives either. The less casualties, the better.”

“Exactly.”

“I want to do something though. I don’t know if we should just wait here. I mean, sure it’s nice to be kids again, and hope that the worst of our problems is getting into this audition, but it’s not, and we can’t pretend like it is.”

Janus turned towards Virgil, grabbing Virgil’s shoulders, “Alright…you’re going to look at it from a different perspective. In the past few weeks, what have we been doing?”

“Training our powers."

“So we’ll be prepared for Caleb, right?”

“Yeah, but-”

“This is exactly like war. We’re preparing because we know that the other side will make an attack. We’re way too weak to make the attack ourselves, especially since Caleb has been building up his defenses. Besides, we’ve sent in troops before, and they’ve all ended in all groups of 6 dying, each one of them including a Sanders. Roman can’t die. Guess what Sanders is left?”

“Logan.”

“Right. By trying to attack instead of waiting for Caleb, we will be repeating the same mistakes. We will end up all dying. Logan will end up dying. Look at it from the Sanders’ perspective. A father who lost his brother at a young age grows up to have kids, only to have the child containing his DNA die. How do you think he’ll feel if his only son dies too, even if he wasn’t his blood?”

“You’re right. I just…I feel useless just standing around waiting for Caleb to hurt us.” Virgil groaned.

“Just, take a deep breath, and trust me. Trust Logan. Everything will be okay. We got this. Take this time to relax and worry about the callbacks.” Remus grinned.

He made eye contact with Janus, who smiled at him. he mouthed at the same time that Virgil spoke back.

“I believe you.”

-+=~=+-

“Casts are out.” A classmate walked up to Remus to eagerly tell him.

“What?” Remus felt his heart flutter. After a week of practicing and callbacks, he was kinda excited to find out whether or not he got the understudy. He was sure Patton got the actual role, being part of the theater club in the first place.

“You got Romeo.”

Remus must’ve heard it wrong.

“What?"

“You got Romeo! Patton Morris is your understudy. Isn’t that cool?”

Remus let his eyes widen, “No way!”

Another classmate walked by, nodding, “Hey, congrats on the role, Porter! Can’t wait to see the performance!”

He let out an enthusiastic laugh before turning to the original classmate, “Who’s Juliet?”

“Ah…there’s the horrible part. It’s Logan.” The classmate made a face, “Sorry you got stuck with the robot.”

“Robot?”

“You know…because he’s kinda cold, and always apathetic? I don’t know how he got the role.”

“Logan’s not cold and apathetic.” A new voice came in.

Remus turned to see Patton.

“He just doesn’t act fake like most people. You should be grateful for that.” Patton rolled his eyes as he threw his arm over Remus’s shoulder, “Congrats on the role, Remus!”

“Thanks.” Remus gave a small smile, “You aren’t too sad over losing it?”

“Nah.” Patton tsked, “I’m still a part of the ensemble. Besides, I’m your understudy. If anything, I’m honored I got the understudy.”

Remus nodded, “You’re okay with me being Romeo with Logan being Juliet?”

“There’s nothing I can really do.” Patton shrugged, “Just do me a favor?”

“What’s up?”

“Don’t tell Logan that I like him, please? I don’t really know how I really feel about Logan yet, whether or not I like him as a friend, or more than that, or a full on crush, or hate his guts.” Patton blew a hair out of his face, “If you do that, I’ll keep your secret about the crush on Janus.”

“Record scratch?” Remus raised an eyebrow, “I don’t have one. Where’d you get that idea?”

“Come on, Remus, you definitely have to realize it. I mean you already do so much boyfriend stuff with him. You buy his things, he buys you things, you guys go to one-on-one hangouts to get to know each other, which is the actual definition of a date. You joke around with him, almost the entire school already thinks you’re dating him. You two are a perfect match in personalities even-”

"I don't date friends."

“You don’t date anyone.” Virgil walked up to them.

"Ouch, Virgil. I didn't expect you to cut so deep. No one meets my standards."

"Incredibly low ones." Virgil remarked.

"I don’t date friends because then it gets messy. If we break up, everything will fall apart. It’s just easier to not fall for them, and look for people outside. I don’t like Janus like that.”

“You can think what you think, but…by the way I see how good you and Janus are together, I think you should at least think about the possibility.”

Remus blinked, “If anything, Jan and I are only friends with benefits. Great ones."

"I told you for the last time that being best friends is not the same thing as friends with benefits." Janus rolled his eyes as he approached the group with Logan behind him.

"That's Remus for you." Virgil sighed. "Where are you two coming from?"

"Calculus." Logan spoke, "Have you seen the cast?”

“Yeah. Glad I got Tybalt. I didn’t want too big of a role.” Virgil nodded.

“I don’t understand why I, as an understudy, also got the role of Lady Capulet.” Janus scoffed.

“They don’t have enough people to just cast you as an understudy, Janus.” Patton rolled his eyes.

“To be honest, I didn’t want the role. I just knew that if I didn’t try my best, Patton wouldn’t give me Crofters.” Logan shrugged.

“Wow, Lo, I didn't know you were like that." Patton clutched his chest in fake woundedness.

"D.W.I. Deal with it." Logan smirked.

"Let's continue discussing our next steps at the nearby cafe. I'm hungry and want drinks." Janus remarked as he began to walk faster away from the group. A quick agreement was all that was needed for the other four to follow Janus.

-+=~=+-

Remus walked out of his car to see Logan already waiting for him. The two had agreed to meet with each other at the nearby apple orchard entrance on a Saturday morning to practice their lines, albeit after a lot of sexual comments made by Remus. Logan seemed to be unaffected by Remus' comments still.

“As on time as ever, robot man.” Remus grinned, “Thought we were meeting by the orchard.”

“Might as well walk you there. I wouldn’t want you to get lost.” Logan said in almost a teasing tone.

“Is that emotion I hear in you?” Remus faux gasped. "My, my, Logan. Am I riling you up?"

“Come on, let’s hurry there.” Logan rolled his eyes.

Remus followed behind Logan as they walked towards the orchard. He decided to break the silence in between the journey, “So…why the apple orchard to meet of all places? And why couldn’t anyone else come along? They seemed rather…hesitant to and I know it was probably your doing.”

“I needed to talk to you alone. The orchard’s been closed down for a few months, so it’s a good place to do exactly that.”

“Why?���

“I’ll explain when we get there. Come on.”

When they had reached the apple orchard, the two stared at the rusted gate that surrounded the entire area. It was forbidden.

“Come on.” Logan urged as he threw his backpack over the fence and immediately started climbing over it.

Remus blinked as he realized Logan was already on the other side, dusting his clothes off and grabbing his backpack.

Remus soon followed after, not sure where Logan was leading him. Finally, they arrived at a tall hardwood tree that probably reached up to 25 feet high. Logan threw his backpack down and so Remus did the same, expecting to sit underneath the tree and practice.

“So, what did you want to talk about, Logan?”

“Not here.” Logan looked around, “Too many eyes.”

Remus scoffed, “What are you talking about? There’s nobody here.”

Logan just pointed to the branch above them. He grabbed the script he had in his backpack and put it in his pocket. He then supported his weight to pull himself up, and steadily, he climbed up until he reached one of the taller branches. Logan looked down at Remus, sighing, “Come on, Remus, hurry up already.”

Remus grumbled, mimicking his as he slowly but surely climbed his way up. “Hey, Logan, is now a good time to tell you that I’m afraid of heights?”

“Stop complaining and get up here. I know you aren’t!”

As soon as Remus reached the branch Logan was on, Logan scooted over so the two of them could share the space. “So…why up here of all places?”

Logan scanned the area, “This orchard has to be crawling with ghosts, especially working for Caleb. I can’t take the chance.”

“How do you know none of them will be able to come up here?”

“I don’t.” Logan murmured, “But I need no one to disturb me.”

“I still don’t understand why we had to meet alone.”

“I don’t like people seeing me when I go into visions.”

“That shouldn’t change anything.”

“I’ve been having a couple of rough dreams of Caleb these past couple of days. I need you to help me confirm that, but in order for me to trigger the dream, I have to take off my crystal.” Logan murmured as he took off a necklace he was wearing. He held it out for Remus, and when Remus held onto it, he felt a weight lift off his chest. Not only did he think it was creative that Logan had made his crystal into a necklace, but he noticed that double the crystal helped block out the power Caleb had over his soul.

“Ready whenever you are, Remus.” Logan took a deep breath, closing his eyes as he held out his hand. Remus took it and immediately, they were both put forth into a vision.

Logan was coughing. he was pale and weak, chained to a wall.

“You know…this could all be over, if the chosen one surrenders.” A man from darkness chuckled. Remus could only assume it was Caleb.

Despite his desperate need of nutrition, fire burned in his eyes as he scowled at Caleb, “He would never.”

“Ah, you have so little faith in the love he has for you.” Caleb tsked, “I see everything, and with him, it’s Logan this, Logan that. He’s so pathetic.”

“And I’m telling you that he would never fall for the surrender. I would never let him, and besides, he won’t think so highly of me once he realizes my incapability to love someone.”

“Oh come on.” Caleb flicked Logan’s head, “You can’t actually believe that you can’t love someone, can you? I’ve told you that I have eyes everywhere. I see the way you look at your friends. If you can love platonically, wouldn’t it make sense that you could love romantically? I see the way you look at the chosen one. Even if you continue denying, I know it’s different. He’s your best friend, isn’t he?”

Logan looked away, “Don’t talk about him like that.”

Caleb grinned, “Well…if you ever change your mind, the deal still stands.”

There was silence for the first time as Logan debated it. It seemed almost unlike him, and it was clear he thought so too with his conflicted look.

“What is this? I’ve never heard silence from a Sanders like this.” Caleb turned, cackling, “Well, has my little prince finally decided to say yes to my deal?”

“Don’t call me that.” Logan rolled his eyes, “...you promise that he will be safe?”

“Yes. I promise.”

“What about Remus?”

“Yes, yes, and all your other friends. Oh, and a perk with this is that you’ll never have to feel those feelings ever again.”

“Never again?”

“You can be a true robot.”

“I hope you know that a promise is soul-binding when it comes to me.” Logan glared.

“I don’t plan on breaking that promise unless you break your side of the deal.”

Then, Remus watched as three words uttered out of Logan’s mouth that he thought never would.

“I give up.”

He watched in horror as Caleb cackled in victory, and he watched as Logan’s body slumped down lifelessly. A dark blue aura came out from Logan that could only be explained as his soul, and was put into a nearby jar. As soon as it was put in the jar, Logan gasped, sitting up. Then, he blinked before staring at Caleb.

“How do you feel?” Caleb grinned.

“Apathetic.” Logan spoke, but the blue soul glowed as he spoke.

“It was a pleasure doing business for me.” Caleb bowed, “I can’t wait to have you work for me for eternity after you die.”

“The same to you.” Logan replied numbly. If Remus thought that Logan didn’t have any emotion in his speech before, it had nothing on the apathy in his voice now.

Remus gasped as he got out of the vision, staring at Logan.

“What vision did you get?” Logan asked.

Remus recounted it all for Logan, “What about you?”

“Same.” Logan murmured, but his eyes wandered off to the side, a part of him clearly lying. Remus had hung around Janus enough to see any lies he had come across.

However, Remus didn’t want to think about it anymore, so he changed the subject. Giving Logan his necklace back, he cleared his throat, “Right, should we practice?”

“Yeah.” Logan nodded, before he stared at the script, “Remus, would you rather have Janus as your Juliet?”

“I know Patton would rather have him be Romeo.”

“Ah, I’m not talking about him. He desperately wanted to be the lead role, but you got it because you performed better. He fucked up at the auditions. I’m talking about you.”

“Well…to be completely honest with you, Janus’s my best friend. I don’t feel comfortable kissing anyone, but if it had to be someone, I’d be more comfortable with Janus.”

“You do realize that we wouldn’t actually be kissing. It’s a stage kiss.” Logan murmured.

“That’s besides the point. It’s just the thought of pretending to kiss someone even.” Remus sighed, “I mean, I bet you feel the same way.”

“Eh, sort of.”

“Sort of?” Remus raised an eyebrow.

“I need you to do me a favor.” Logan looked out towards the distance. “Last one.”

“Sure, what do you need me to do?”

“Cover your ears so you can’t hear anything and squeeze your eyes shut. I need you to keep them closed as you count to 60 seconds out loud. Once the 60 seconds are over, I need you to open your eyes and climb down the tree. I’ll let you know what to do from there.”

“Why?” Remus raised an eyebrow.

“You said you wanted Janus to be your Juliet. I’m doing you a favor. Just trust me.”

Remus sighed as he did just that, closing his eyes and covering his ears. Then as loudly as he possibly could in order to not hear his surroundings, he counted to 60 seconds.

When he opened his eyes, he was met with the surprise that Logan was not next to him. Doing just as he said, he climbed down the tree only to see his clutching his right leg at the bottom.

“What happened?”

Logan looked up, holding onto Remus to stand up, careful to balance on his left leg, “Good, it would be an issue if it were an open fracture.”

“What did you do?” Remus demanded.

“Grab our backpacks. I need to make a call."

“What are you talking about? Logan, what did you do?”

Logan scowled, hopping until he got to his backpack, grabbing his phone. “Stop questioning and grab your stuff. We need to go somewhere.”

“You said that you were going to do me a favor. What did you do?” Remus asked before it hit him. “Oh my fuck, you did not. Logan, I thought you were just going to say you were sick or something! What do you mean you jumped off the tree?”

As much as Remus liked to joke about his intrusive thoughts, there was a difference between voicing them and actually wanting to commit them. It didn't matter how many times he had thought about maybe jumping off or pushing someone off the tree trunk himself. He didn't think Logan had the ability to do it and he didn't know why Logan would do it for him of all people.

“I didn’t jump.” Logan groaned, “Come on, Remus, use those muscles Janus always brags about and carry both our backpacks. I can walk on my own.”

“Then what did you do?”

“I simply fell.” Logan shrugged.

“That’s the same thing.”

“It isn’t!”

-+=~=+-

After Logan had managed to climb over the fence through sheer luck, Remus hadn’t seen much of his until the next week where he showed up with crutches and a cast. At that point, he couldn’t even look at Logan without feeling a twinge of shame for the part he played in his injury.

“Logan, what happened?” Janus asked, worried as soon as he sat down. “Is that why you weren’t here for the past week? We thought it was so unlike you.”

“I just fell off a tree.” Logan shrugged it off, “You have to tell the theater teacher that I can’t do the play.”

“Nonsense. We’ll move the play to adapt around you. That’s how it’s always been.” Patton shrugged.

“No, it’s okay.” Logan shook his head, “Just let Janus take my place.”

“I don’t know if that’s the best idea.” Janus looked almost nervous.

“Do it for me.” Logan struggled to show emotion in his voice, but it was well received as Janus gave in.

So when it came down to rehearsals, it seemed as though everything Remus wanted finally seemed like it came true as Janus came to practice as Juliet with him.

“Alright, you two, set up for the balcony scene.”

Remus blinked as he stared at Janus who was standing on an elevated part of the tower prop.

He stared at his best friend and said the lines, “But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun. Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon, Who is already sick and pale with grief, That thou his maid art far more fair than he-”

“STOP! Remus, again.”

“What? What did I do?” Remus broke contact with Janus as he looked at the drama teacher.

“You need emotion. Pretend like you’re completely in love with him. Say it to Janus as if you’ve never said anything before. Come on, show me a Romeo that loves his Juliet. Show me what you had in you the day of auditions.”

Remus took a deep breath, and this time, he looked at Janus as if he hadn’t before. He noticed the way Janus’s hair fell in front of him. He noticed the way he brushed it off to the side and envisioned it was Remus brushing it behind Janus' ear. He noticed the way the sides of his eyes crinkled when he smiled and he envisioned him making Janus smile.

“Be not his maid, since he is envious; his vestal livery is but sick and green And none but fools do wear it; cast it off. It is my lady, O, it is my love! O, that he knew he were! he speaks yet he says nothing: what of that?”

“So much better. Thank you! Continue with the scene.”

-+=~=+-

“So, how long until your injury heals?” Virgil asked Logan as he bit into a roll of sushi. All of them had decided to hang out in Logan’s house after school to practice the play, and also discuss their next steps with Caleb.

“Well, it would’ve been healed already, had Logan allowed us to.” His mother broke in with another plate of sushi rolls. Immediately, Patton and Roman dug in, grabbing almost a fourth of the plate.

“Slow down, you two.” Logan stared at them threateningly, “But I already told you, Mother, I would rather it heal naturally.”

“It might heal wrong if it heals naturally. We can have a healer perform magic on you.”

“I don’t need any more magic in my body than I already have.”

“You’re just too stubborn.” Principal Sanders sighed before she went back into the kitchen, “Well…at least you’re making friends.”

Logan snapped a little too fast, “They’re not my friends.”

“Oh yeah?”

“They’re just classmates.” Logan replied quietly, almost as if he regretted what he said.

“Sure.” Remus raised an eyebrow, “Would you mind telling us how you broke your leg then?”

“I just…fell off of a tree.” Logan looked away from Remus as he stood up slowly, “Excuse me. I’m going to the bathroom.”

As soon as he was gone, Patton raised an eyebrow, “He acting weird?”

“Weirder than usual.” Remus agreed, “But there’s no way he’ll give in and tell us what’s going on.”

Janus finished and stood up, “Re, when you’re done eating, can I talk to you alone?”

“Ooooo, you’re in trouble~” Virgil smirked.

“Eh, I’m full.” Remus shrugged as he went to throw away his trash and wash his hands with Janus. As soon as they did just that, they found a quiet room to talk in.

“I don’t know what I’m going to do. I feel like I might vomit every time I enter the stage.” Janus murmured, “I was fine being the understudy. I was fine being anything but the lead. But Juliet? God, why is Logan being so stubborn?”

Remus stared at Janus. “You’ve never really had an issue with stage fright. I know it’s not your biggest thing, but you’ve always stepped up to the challenge when anyone’s in need. Why is it an issue now?”

Janus paced around, groaning, “I don’t know. I guess, maybe because of you?”

“What? Why?” Remus was surprised.

“Well, because you’re my best friend. It’s weird to think that I would have to kiss you.”

“I never really thought of it like that.” Remus blinked, “To be honest, it’s the contrary for me. I feel the most comfortable kissing you out of everyone else.”

“Yeah, but Remus, you’ve had your first kiss. You’ve had your fair share of exes, kisses, and all that stuff. I haven’t.” Janus looked away, “You’d be my first kiss, and I don’t know if I want it to be because we feel obligated to as Romeo and Juliet. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind kissing you, but if we had to, I’d rather it be because we both wanted to. I don’t want to force you into a position where we have to kiss each other.”

Remus’s heart skipped a beat. He had never seen it like that. Janus was right. Janus had been through every single one of Remus’s romantic relationships. Janus had been there for Remus when he was broken up or when he broke up with someone. Janus listened to him talk about all of his firsts, like dates, kisses, hand-holding, and all the work. Remus hadn’t once even heard about a romantic interest of Janus'.

“Well, now I feel uncomfortable kissing you.” Remus blinked, “Logan said there is an option to stage a kiss.”

“What’s that?”

“I get really close to your lips but our lips never touch.” Remus remarked.

Janus nodded numbly, “Re, I’m sorry about all this. I’m sorry I feel uncomfortable with the fact that my first kiss will not be meaningful.”

Remus smiled, “Hey, Jan, don’t even worry about it. I am happy to wait for you to be okay with all this. This is a lot of change, and I will be there every step of the way. If making you feel comfortable means I don’t kiss you, that’s fine by me.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, of course. But if you ever change your mind, I wouldn’t mind stealing that first kiss of yours.” Remus grinned. “Better someone you know will always have your back rather than someone who makes you cry over them later.”

“Hm, I’ll keep your offer in mind.” Janus flicked Remus’s nose before turning away. Now that this had been cleared up between them, Remus felt his heart pounding in his chest. Why was he nervous now?

-+=~=+-

“Fracture a femur.” Logan held out flowers for Remus.

“Hopefully not like you?” Remus raised an eyebrow as he took the bouquet of flowers, taking one of the blue carnations to put in Logan’s hair.

“Shut up.” Logan glared before hesitating with his words, “I may not be the nicest person in the world, but you and Janus truly deserve these roles. I hope that by forcing you two in proximity to practice as forbidden lovers, you two find your place in the world and your place within each other.”

Remus blinked, staring at Logan, before laughing, “Thanks, Logan. I think that was the nicest thing you ever said to me.”

“Shove it.” Logan grumbled, “Do you know where everyone else is? I want to give them flowers.”

“I saw Patton over there, but I don’t know about the others.” Remus shrugged and he watched as Logan walked off. Right as he did, Remus saw Janus come up to him.

“Hey, you okay?” Remus asked.

“Nervous.” Janus sighed, trying to calm his nerves by moving on.

“You’re going to do amazing. And when in doubt, don’t look at the crowd. Just look at me. You’re never nervous when you practice around me, right?”

“Right.” Janus replied numbly. “Can we maybe practice the stage kiss once so I know what to expect?”

“Course.” Remus replied as he brought his hand to his chin, pressing his thumb to his lips. “Don’t freak out, or move, okay?”

Janus nodded, and Remus leaned down to press his lips against his thumb. He heard Janus’s breath hitch, and he felt Janus’s lips move to open. Remus made sure not to prolong the kiss as he separated, taking his hand from Janus’s face and wiping the saliva of his thumb off.

As soon as he separated, he felt his heart pounding so loud that he could barely hear Janus.

“That wasn’t so bad. A little scary, but not so bad.” Janus sighed, clutching his heart. “Were you okay with that?”

“Yeah.” Remus stuttered, wondering why that left such a nervous impact on him. Maybe it was the closeness of their lips. Maybe it was the way he knew Janus was smiling. Maybe it was how he could feel Janus’s breath. Maybe it was how Janus' breath smelt like mint. Maybe it was how Remus wondered how Janus' lips tasted and felt.

“You two ready?” Logan walked up with Virgil and Patton in tow, holding out a bouquet for Janus.

“Thanks.” Janus smiled, adding to the bouquet in Logan’s hair with a marigold. “Can you help out and put both Remus' and mine by our stuff?”

Logan grabbed them and turned to show Patton and Virgil’s addition into his hair with baby’s breath and a william flower.

“Now or never.” Remus smiled as he heard his cue to go on stage, winking at Janus, “Good luck, darling.”

“You too, sunshine.” Janus smiled back at him.

-+=~=+-

Remus didn’t know if he was ready for the kiss scene, but it came by fast, as soon he was standing in front of Janus, spouting out the lines, “If I profane with my unworthiest hand, This holy shrine, the gentle fine is this: My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss.”

Janus clearly was still unsure with the look in his eyes as he spouted his lines, putting their palms together. “Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, Which mannerly devotion shows in this; For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.”

“Have not saints' lips, and holy palmers too?”

“Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.”

“O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do; They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.”

“Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake.”

This was it. There was one last line before they kissed.

Remus stared at Janus, bringing his chin up to look at him as they readied themselves for the kiss. Pressing his thumb against Janus' lips, Remus said the line, “Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take.”

Leaning in, he pulled Janus closer to him. Under his breath, he whispered, “Here goes nothing.”

However, before he could do anything, Janus had grabbed onto Remus’s wrist to pull his hand down and pressed their lips together. Then, all of his questions were answered.

Janus' lips were soft. While his breath smelt like mint, his lips tasted like berries. It was probably the new chapstick he was wearing. Janus smiled in the kiss and it soon hit him.

Janus was kissing him. The Janus that never did anything for himself. The Janus that didn’t want his first kiss to not be meaningful. The Janus who promised to never kiss anyone without romantic intention to. The Janus who never liked having his private moments shared with anyone, let alone an audience. His Janus.

Dazed, Remus separated from Janus, blinking before remembering his line, “Thus from my lips, by yours, my sin is purged.”

And in that moment, he felt it was true. As he continued with the play, his head in a whirl, he started to realize that maybe he felt the same way about Janus as Janus did with Remus. After all, Remus did kiss back. Remus did say he wouldn’t mind kissing Janus.

And only after their second kiss, which Janus had decided to take charge and lead with a real kiss again, did Remus realize how in love he had been with his best friend this entire time. And a fire burned in his heart, egging him to continue fighting against Caleb because he didn’t want to lose the battle between them. Not when he finally realized his place with Janus. Not when he finally realized he would do anything to be with him. Not when he still had hundreds of chapters left to live with Janus in hand. He wouldn’t let Caleb get in the way of them and his future. ——————– i 100% forgot about the fact that this happened in this chapter but LMAOOO awww and yes it's a gay version of romeo and juliet and yes remus has calmed down from his original sexual innuendos all the time to just sometimes because 1) i ran out of ways that type of way and 2) he's sick so he can't be bothered at this point to do it but dukeceit at its finest <3.

If you enjoyed this, please consider reblogging! Reblogging helps me a lot and it's just two clicks of a button (trust me, likes don't do anything to help me). Check out my masterlist for more, feel free to request any writings, and stick around if you want to see the rest of what I have in store for this! :)

[shadow-whisperer152]

Father’s Day (Chapter 7)

(Aaaaaaah this is the chapter I basically formed this entire fic around! Can’t believe this was just meant to be a one shot, yet here we are at chapter 7 (and we aren’t even done yet). Hope you enjoy!)

(Chapter 6)

~Time Skip~ 

Janus could never have fathomed that everything would go so wrong. It felt like only yesterday his boys were bringing half-cooked pancakes to him in bed and cuddling with him under their one soft blanket on the couch. He tried not to think about those days too much; the memories only made the ache in his heart all the more prominent, the cold on his skin all the more biting, the tears down his face all the more sorrowful. It had been a long time since Virgil had disappeared from their lives. For a time, Janus and Remus had been filled with resentment at how Virgil had chosen the others over his own family. Remus had refused to allow Janus to blame himself, begging to be let upstairs to show those impostors even a fraction of the pain and fear they themselves felt. And, like a fool, Janus had let him. He doesn’t understand how he could possibly have been idiotic enough to make the same mistake twice. But back then, he didn’t understand how it was a mistake. Now he knew better. 

Remus had gone up, wreaked havoc, done what Remus does best. And in turn those Sides had greeted him with patience and understanding. It had taken some time, but much too soon he was up there all the time, and then he was never down here at all. Janus wanted to say that the Sides had blinded him, manipulated him, turned him against the only person who could ever love him. But after all this time, he finally understood: he’d been the monster under the stairs the entire time. It wasn’t the other Sides that were the problem: it was him. He was the reason Virgil and Remus had left because he’d been the one imprisoning them. Janus had been so blinded by his own fear that he’d corrupted the two young sides, making them feel like they were monsters too if only to feel less lonely in his misery. The other Sides had greeted his sons with such warmth and acceptance because they deserved it. Janus didn’t. He was different, always had been, always would be. He would never be treated like one of them because ever since his manifestation he’d been the villain, someone to be feared. Every time he went up there he was yelled at and denied and ignored, while his sons got the chance they deserved. Maybe this was how it was meant to be; Janus would spend the rest of his days alone while his sons would live on with their new happy famILY. 

All these negative thoughts and feelings poisoned Janus on the inside. He became a recluse, and stopped answering the other’s calls entirely. He spent his hours trying to squash the useless flicker of hope that still remained, desperately trying to save himself from the pain of being hurt by abandoning the idea that he would ever see his boys again. He didn’t even bother to dress in his usual attire, everything replaced with what he wore as pajamas. Everything except his hat. (He couldn’t bear to part with it, no matter how many times he put it away he’d always end up taking it out again.) Janus would have stayed like this for the rest of eternity if he could’ve. 

Unfortunately, he ran out of tea. 

Now this wasn’t a problem he’d ever had to face. He’d either ask Remus to summon him some, or he’d go to his little garden on Remus' side of the Imagination to pick some tea leaves himself. But Remus wasn’t around anymore, and he couldn’t go into the Imagination without either of the twins finding out. He’d stopped eating or sleeping properly since he’d been left behind he couldn’t remember when, so summoning the tea himself was out of the question. There was only one option left. He had to go up there, to the place he swore he’d never go again. Janus wished he could just go on without tea, drink water or soda or nothing at all. But the warmth of a cup of tea was the only joy he had left in his miserable existence, and without it he might discorporate from sorrow. 

He made a plan. He’d go up to the door underneath the stairs, cross to the kitchen, steal some tea, and run back down. That’s all. He wouldn’t look at anyone, wouldn’t talk to anyone, and if they tried to stop him he’d……he’d……well, hopefully there wouldn’t be anyone there to stop him. He clutched his hat in his hands in an attempt to gather some courage, slowly making his way out of the Dark Side to cross the Subconscious. 

Janus could hear voices. The door was very slightly ajar, and he listened closely. He couldn’t hear exactly what was going on, but they seemed to be whispering. Not just that, but they were at least in the living room. The light in the hallway was off, and so was the one in the kitchen. He could slip through, get his tea, and run back down. Excellent. Janus carefully nudged the door, slipping out and darting across to the kitchen before anyone could see him. He hid behind the counter, heart racing. No screaming, no noise. He hadn’t been spotted. 

Janus slowly stood, backing up until he felt the counter behind him. He turned, snatched the box of tea bags from the cupboard, and creeped back towards the doorway. Halfway home. He stepped out into the hallway again and- 

The lights suddenly turned on, startling him as he whipped towards the living room. Virgil, Remus, Roman, and Logan all sprung up from behind the couch, confetti filling the air. It was only now that Janus noticed the balloons, the table full of food, and the banner strung across the back wall. “Happy Father’s Day!” it read in big bubble letters. Janus stood frozen, mouth opened in a shocked expression. It was Father’s Day already? And……and they were throwing a party? For him? A feeling of warmth, like sticky honey, filled his chest. For the first time in what felt like years he felt a genuine smile spread on his face. He was about to step out of the darkness when a new voice surprised him from atop the stairs. 

“Oh my goodness! Is this all for me?!” Patton ran down the steps, rushing forward. The others all met him in the middle, engulfing him in a big hug. 

“’Course, Pat. We had to celebrate our favorite popstar’s special day after all.” Virgil gave him a crooked smile, nuzzling over his shoulder into his neck. “Happy Father’s Day, Dad.” 

Remus enveloped all the sides in his tentacles, which led to squeals and shrieks of surprise. “Yeah! We’re gonna squeeze you full of joy until your eyes pop out of your head! Happy Daddy’s Day!” He grinned. 

The others spoke as well, and there must have been music, but Janus couldn’t tell. His ears began to ring as he stared at his two sons, the biggest smiles he’d ever seen on their faces as they wrapped themselves further into Patton’s arms. A hiccup made its way out of his mouth, lost under the sound of the other’s chatter. They’d……they’d replaced him. After all he’d done, after all they’d gone through together, they’d found a new father. A good, kind, caring father who could give them everything they’d ever wanted. Janus felt lightheaded, and just like all those years ago, the ground disappeared from under him and he fell, away from the searing warmth and the blinding lights and the hurt hurt hurt hurt that filled his head. He crashed onto the cold, musty floor of the Dark Side and here, where no one could see, where no one would ever see him again, Janus began to wail. His sobs and screams of pain filled the air around him, shaking the Dark Side to its core. He was so ashamed, so destroyed, that he failed to notice he was missing something important.

Upstairs his hat sat surrounded by the discarded tea bags, alone and abandoned in the dark hallway. It wasn’t until hours later, when the food had been eaten and the gifts had been opened, that a figure in purple noticed it lying on the floor.

(It broke my heart to write this one, but it’s going to start looking up for our poor snakey side. Just gotta throw in a little more angst first >:) Hope you enjoyed!)

[beauty-and-passion]

FSS3 Episode 3: Jealousy

Episode 3 and we're getting into it. Thinga happen, tensions rise and someone is closer.

Updates every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

What is FFS3 - Introduction - Season 2 finale - previous episode - next episode

AO3 link for this episode

DISCLAIMER: As said in the introductory post, Fanders Sides Season 3 (season 2 finale included) could have triggering themes/scenes. Please keep that in mind before reading.

_______________________________

Thomas visits Nico while he’s working at the bar and tells him about the auditions.

Nico is very happy for him: Thomas is very lucky to have such big job opportunities, that’s good not only for his career but for his finances too! In addition to that, two very different roles will give him the opportunity to improve his skills and diversify.

Thomas admits, with a smile, that he is working on that and he would love to keep doing it.

(Roman and Remus exchange a gaze: Roman is smiling, Remus is eating a plastic foot. Roman rolls his eyes and diverts his gaze, still with a lingering smile.)

Thomas asks Nico about him: does he have any news too?

Nico replies that he’s not as lucky right now: his usual clients are not contacting him and he got just one request, but it’s a very hard one. He should develop a lot of heavy themes into a 3-minute song and he should do it in a romantic, carefree way. Not so easy to mash these things all together.

Thomas offers his help: they can meet at his place and have a brainstorming session. What about today, after the end of his shift?

Nico thanks him, but he already has a brainstorming session with a friend scheduled for that evening.

(You can choose whatever name you want for Nico’s friend, but for the sake of not calling him “friend” all the time, I will use the name “Hugo”.)

Hugo is Nico’s colleague, the other bartender who works alongside him. Since they have the same working shifts, it’s easy to leave work together after the end of their shift, meet at his place and brainstorm. Also, Hugo plays the guitar, so it’s good for Nico to have a musical base to adapt his lyrics.

Thomas glances at Hugo and his expression turns dark. Hugo acts friendly, but Thomas is wary of him. He barely tells him his name and, when Hugo playfully wraps an arm around Nico’s shoulders, Thomas’ hands close into fists.

After that, Hugo reminds Nico there are other clients too, so they both leave Thomas for a while, to serve other people.

Thomas stirs his glass, sulking. Remus appears next to him and leans closer, until he whispers in Thomas’ ear: Jump the counter. Take a bottle, smash it. Use it as a weapon. Stab him in the neck.

Virgil appears on the other side: he looks horrified and shakes his head. Nope, nope, nope. Thomas should keep his ass on that chair, because if he jumps the counter, he will fall and break a limb. Or he will hit the wall and smash the bottles. And if he succeeds in not getting hurt, he will go to jail for trying to fucking kill someone.

Janus appears on the seat where Remus was: he sits cross-legged, a cocktail in his hand and the most melodramatic pose. Society’s rules truly suck, don’t they? A guy can’t even smash a bottle, use it as a weapon and stab the guy who is trying to steal his boyfriend, without ending up in jail.

Virgil replies that this is not a matter of society’s rules, but of safety. Thomas’ safety. Acting like an idiot, just because a guy is close to Nico is the stupidest thing he could ever do. And he should know that too.

Janus ignores the remark and says that Thomas is just confirming what he wants: Nico. So, why should he sit on the side and watch another guy flirt with him?

Roman appears next to Virgil: he has his head on the counter and pouts. Nico is Thomas’ boyfriend, that guy should stay away from him. Thomas should do something to show that guy who’s the boss.

Virgil shushes Roman: he doesn’t need someone so easily influenced by jealousy.

What’s wrong with being a little jealous?, Janus leans closer to Thomas. Being jealous is healthy, especially if there are some red flags of if a guy is trying to steal your man.

Logan appears behind the counter and confirms that, in that case, there would be nothing wrong with being a little jealous.

But is there a reason, here?, Patton asks. He appears behind the counter too and looks at Hugo. He doesn’t look like a threat.

Thomas looks at Hugo as well: he’s doing his job like any other waiter. He’s not overly friendly with Nico, he doesn’t even look at him.

Maybe he got a bit blinded by jealousy, Thomas admits. Maybe Hugo is just a friend.

Roman crosses his arms. He’s still jealous and he still wants to spend the evening with Nico. But how can they convince Nico that a brainstorming session with Thomas would be more useful than a brainstorming session with Hugo?

Virgil insists that Roman should stop feeding so much into jealousy. He hisses between his clenched teeth that they know it’s not a good thing.

But before he can say anything else, Janus lifts a hand towards Thomas and gets his full attention.

If you cannot break society’s rules, he says, bend them and exploit society.

He reaches into Thomas’ pocket, takes out his phone and puts it on the counter, in front of him.

Thomas looks at his phone, then at Janus, then at his phone again. He turns it on and sees the apps. And he understands.

Nico comes back to tell Thomas his shift is over, but Thomas talks first. He was just thinking about something: he is quite famous on social media, right? He often sings cover songs and even wrote a couple songs himself. So, if he makes a few videos with Nico and sings his songs… and posts them on his socials… and links Nico’s contacts too…

Nico’s face lights up, surprised. Would Thomas really do this for him? Would he give him this much exposure?

Of course he would, Thomas confirms. Then he gets up: Nico’s shift is over, should he wait for him?

Nico nods enthusiastically: he just needs one sec to tell Hugo they won’t meet that evening and they can go.

Thomas smiles, he tells Nico he will wait outside. While he exits, he has Janus’ same satisfied smile.

°

Through a montage, we see Thomas and Nico work together: Thomas sings his songs, Nico writes new ones and exchanges a few lines. They are both in front of a camera and Thomas makes new posts with Nico’s contacts. They even put on a brief sketch and Roman and Remus work together to accompany Thomas’ performance.

We see Roman’s eyes shine, his movements wide and fluid, a dreamy expression every time he looks at Nico. We see Remus and his chaotic, joyful smiles. We see him throwing away the script Roman was holding: they can do something better than this, they should just try one more time.

And so they thrive and Thomas’ smiles get wider and happier.

We see Thomas sleeping on the floor with Nico after a long day of work and Janus picking up Thomas’ pc, to write a joyful, energetic post.

It’s easy to exploit a system that doesn’t know the real you, he says, while posting it.

Virgil, behind him, crosses his arms. His eyeshadow is darker than usual.

On the other side of the room, away from the other Sides, Logan looks at Thomas and Nico, then at the book he’s holding: it’s covered in dust.

He purses his lips, then closes the book loudly, turns around and sinks without a word.

_______________________________

END CARD

Virgil, Patton, Janus, Roman and Remus are sitting in the living room: Remus is exposing a plan to help Thomas that involves burning his kitchen and buying him a pet scorpion. Patton asks how these things should help, to which Remus replies that they keep him motivated and active. If he doesn’t do anything, his entire house will burn: it’s motivation with a side dish of free workout! And the pet scorpion is to keep him always vigilant: if he’s not, the scorpion will sting him and he will die. Great way to always be ready.

Patton’s expressions perfectly show how much he doesn’t like both ideas. However, he still tries to motivate Remus. Maybe they are a bit too much, but they prove Remus cares. So… good job? And please, search for safer ideas.

Remus says he will find even more ideas and disappears with a chaotic, happy smile. Roman gets up, promises he will work with Remus on them and follows him.

Virgil accuses Patton sarcastically: so you like Remus’ ideas now? Since you became best friends with Janus, now even Remus is okay for you? You, who were the first to send him away?

Patton admits this was the past. Now he’s trying to become a better Side and to acknowledge that Remus’ contributions, despite being scary and gross are… well, his way to help. He still has a long way ahead, sure, but he has good intentions. More or less.

Virgil scoffs. So that’s how he truly is. He thought Patton was much, much better. But instead, he’s just like Janus: a manipulative bastard, who just thinks about what’s best for him and his new bestie.

Silence falls between the remaining Sides. Then, Patton straightens his posture and turns to Virgil.

He knows Janus is a liar, he says, but he also knows Janus isn’t just his lies. And Virgil knows that too, so he should remember it, instead of accusing Patton of not being able to do his job. He is the Side responsible for morality and it’s up to him to recognize good and bad intentions. And Janus doesn’t have any bad intentions.

Virgil stands up. Not even one?, he exclaims. He lifts a hand towards Janus and it’s clear he’s struggling to reveal something. But in the end, he just says Patton doesn’t know him.

Patton replies he knows how to be Morality.

Virgil makes a frustrated groan and leaves. Patton slumps on his seat, then takes a long sigh. Janus turns to him and Patton cracks a weak smile: it wasn't the best discussion they had, but Virgil is angsty, so it’s okay, they will get through it.

Janus doesn’t smile back. He just asks Patton if he still wants to cooperate with him.

Patton confirms: he still wants to.

Are you sure?, Janus insists. Working with me means doing things you refused to do for years. It means accepting my boys.

I already accepted Virgil and I am doing my best to accept Remus, Patton replies, but Janus interrupts him: accepting his boys means ALL of his boys.

Patton shuts up. Janus tells him they both know where Thomas’ jealousy comes from.

Patton lowers his head, he thinks about it. When he lifts his gaze again, he says that Thomas is an adult: he cannot escape from himself anymore. And that means he is finally ready to know and accept all of his Sides.

_______________________________

AUTHOR’S NOTE

First of all: no Side has one role only. Roman isn’t just Creativity, but also Passion and Ego. Virgil is Anxiety and fight-or-flight. Patton is Morality, but also “most of Thomas’ feelings”. Janus is Deceit, but also self-preservation and denial. Remus is Intrusive Thoughts and (probably) also death/sexual drive.

So, why should Orange be one thing only? If he’s the embodiment of rage, he probably takes care of the whole rage spectrum - so hate, frustration, resentment, envy and even jealousy. He cannot be a one-dimensional cardboard.

Speaking of the end card, Patton needed to show some character growth too. I know that most of his growth is focused in season 2, with the Nostalgia episodes and POF. But he needed to take another step further: to prove he’s an adult. To prove he learned his lesson and he’s trying to make amends for his past mistakes. To prove that he knows what he’s doing, no matter if Virgil doesn’t trust him.

And yes, Virgil is a pain in the ass, I know. But please do not forget that Virgil doesn’t like changes - especially ones that involve more dark Sides around / having more power in Thomas’ life. He still needs time to grow.

( Support me on Ko-fi )

_______________________________

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[thecrowslullaby]

Janus resisting the urge to cheat on his mans lol. This mf really be Fallon for anyone with glasses huh?

a certains someone is counting on it

spoilers in tags as per usual(for the 3 next updates)

also curse myself for rambling bc now I wanna illustrate all their absolutly stupid adventures they had as kids

I really want to just post the whole comic in one go now but I must stay strong ;-;

[alex-demon-wolf]

Farm Hands

Based on doodles from @thecrowslullaby check them out, they make amazing mostly lociet work! There is some cursing!

Roman sighed as he got off the bus, bags in tow. He looked around, only seeing fields upon fields of wheat and tall grass, with the dirt road the bus went on being the only thing to separate it, "Uh.. y'know where the farm is?" Roman looked at the driver, who looked back

"Which farm? There's gotta be about a hundred round 'ere,"

"I don't know, the one ran by some short dude? The one a guy named Remus-"

"Oh. That one. Down the road for bout a mile or two, it'll be pretty clear when you get nears it," With that, the doors shut, and the bus was gone

"Wait, can't you-?!" He sighed again, and started the walk, pulling along his luggage. "Stupid Remus, and your stupid want to be in the stupid south, and live on a stupid farm, with some idiotic bee-keeper," He trudged along, feeling the heat of the noon sun beating down on him, the humidity not helping him keep the energy he had, "Could've just moved to the city with me, get all those lovely comforts, but chose stupid, stinky, feathered pests over me! You're own bro-" He tripped over a rock, a small dirt cloud puffing up from underneath him, "Motherf-"

"Ro-Bro! I'm so happy to see you!" Remus hugged his brother tightly, smiling like it was Christmas morning, "I was starting to worry when you didn't get here by lunch, but don't worry there's plenty left still!" He actually took a look at his brother, and noticed the dirt, and sweat that caked his face, fancy white shirt now looking more so brown, and sticking to him

"Why.. didn't you tell me.. it was miles away?.." He panted out as the walked to the farm house

"I thought I did, my bad.. but, there's a nice tub in the house, and I think a cold bath will help get the pep back into your step! How about I just take these to your room, and you get cleaned up?" Remus picked up the luggage, Roman just nodding, following Remus to the bathroom, which was thankfully next to where Roman would be staying

"And who are you?" Roman grabbed a slice of the pizza, looking at the man sitting across from him at the table. He was short, probably the bee-keeper, with long hair that seemed pretty thin

"Roman Kalore, Remus' twin," He took a bite of his slice, "You?"

"Janus Alister. Haven't seen you on the farm today, you just get here?" He got a slice from his own pizza, Roman cringing slightly seeing pineapples on it

"No, got here little after one. Why would, of all people, I be working on your farm?"

"You seriously think I'm going to let you just stay here, and not help around?"

"Who makes their guests work?!"

"Someone who needs more help than they can get. I'll run you through the routine tomorrow,"

Not long after, the two heard the front door open, and the smell of chicken came into the house, along with the trash rat that it was coming from, "Sorry I'm late, Jessica was being bitchy to Arnold again, then Rosemary tried to sit on Petunia's eggs, that left some blood on the floor-" He kept talking as he walked over, going on about chicken drama, then, "Also, Jan your boyfriend's here, he may be a little bloody though-" He sat down, started eatin

Roman's nose crinkled up at the stench coming from his brother, who started eating with his gross hands, "Why??" Remus shrugged a little, eating happily

In came in a man, slightly taller than the twins, some blood on his shirt, hands covered in something. He had a basket of eggs, half moon glasses looking gross, "Got the eggs.." He walked over, placing the basket on the table, "I'm taking a shower then sleeping, night to you three," Janus blew him a kiss as he left

Roman groaned as he covered his head with his pillow, Remus jumping off the top bunk, shaking him, "Wakey wakey! Eggs and- well no bakey today, but waffles!" He smiled brightly at him, going to get dressed

"What time is it?" Roman sat up, curls going every which way

"Seven thirty, I think Jan was bein forging for once!" Remus smiled at Roman, dressed in a green flannel, and some old looking blue jeans. Roman groaned, hiding his face in the pillow

"So what am I doin?" Roman looked down at the bee-keeper, half wanting to squat down to just silently point out his height, the other half knowing he'd probably get socked in the face

"You're going to be helping me around the farm," He looked up at him, "First we're going to sheer the sheep that haven't been yet, check on Remus, then collect honey from the bees, by then it'll be lunch, and we're heading to town for it so you may want to change by then,"

"I.. can't help with the bees," Roman tried to phrase it such a way that it got what he needed to say, but didn't want to across

"Why?"

Roman took a breath before saying, "Bees.. freak me out, and I doubt having someone panic will help anything,"

He thought it over, "Then you can check on the cows when I go to the bees. They shouldn't be too much trouble for you, they mostly just lay around, now let's go,"

Roman sighed, pulling feathers out of his hair, even when he got to the cows. He looked at them from the fence, their food looking full, so did their water. Some were walking, some were laying around, a fluffy brown one looked back at him, laying down as she did. "Hey Little Lady, how you doin?.." Roman smiled a little at her.

"Moo!" Is the response he got, which was about all he expected.

"Same here, today's been rough, especially with Remus," He laughed a little, looking around before hopping the fence, heading over, "I love him, but he seriously couldn't pick a better place to stay?"

"Mooooo,"

"Sorry, didn't mean any offense to your home," He sat down, leaning against her. She rested her head on him, Roman petting her a little, "You're so cute.. got it real easy too, huh?.."

"Moo?" He could've sworn he heard the question mark

"Get to just lay around, get to eat, and drink whenever.. have people take care of you.." Roman snuggled her, "While most of us have jobs we don't like, with people we hate, with barely anytime outside of it for the things that we do like, and want to do.."

"Mooo,"

"Yeah, life sucks as an adult," He looked up at the sky, "Maybe that's why Remus still acts the way he does.. Probably why he chose here over the city in all reality," He laughed a bit, remembering how he'd cursed his brother for half the walk up to this farm

The cow snuggled Roman, who shut his eyes. He snuggled her back a bit, smiling softly as he started to fall asleep

"How's it goin Bee Boy?" Janus smiled hearing that voice, looking at his friend from where he was dealing with some weeds, having extra time before lunch

"Pretty well, how about you Virgil?" The much much taller sat down with him, moving some of his black hair out of the way

"Eh, as well as someone who likes black, and hoodies can be in the middle of a southern," summer,"

"So you're more miserable than usual?" He tugged up a weed, putting it in the weed basket for now

"Yee-up," Leaned back, using his arms to hold him up, "So how had it been with the city boy?"

"He's been.. disagreeable, but helpful, though I had to send hims to 'check' on the cows since he couldn't help with the bees,"

"Lucky bastard," Virgil laughed a little, "Nessi probably enticed him into napping with her,"

"Oh most definitely, why I sent him over there instead of to the horses," Janus looked at Virgil, "Speaking of which, have you seen Logan? Haven't seen him sense yesterday,"

"He's off in town I think, hanging out with the baker probably," Janus went back to plucking the weeds, the two falling into that familiar friendly silence. Soon, they heard the bell ringing from the barn, to announce it was noon to everyone around

Roman smiled at the bustling little town, smells from all the restaurants filling his nose, but were slightly messed up with Remus walking next to him, smelling a little like chickens still, "So where are we eating?"

"There's this cheap place next to the bakery, we can grab some food there, then head over and say hey to Pat?" Remus suggested happily, Roman noticing how his smile got a little bigger at the name

"Pat?"

"He's the baker, he makes some really good stuff, gives us a discount most of the time,"

"Cause he wants to get you to fall for him," Janus casually said, Remus blushing a bit

"Shut it Jan!"

The trio got into the bakery after their meal* Remus going up to the counter immediately, and started chatting with the man behind the counter. His smile seemed even brighter than when Roman arrived, as he got a laugh out of the man. Before long, Roman had a little cake stuffed into his mouth by his brother, who was telling him about how Pat had agreed to come to some bonfire that night

Roman wiped the sweat from his brow as he kept pulling up, and cleaning off the carrots, sleeves of his flannel rolled up to his elbows. He looked up hearing footsteps, seeing Janus walking over, "Oh, hey!" He greeted, before focusing on what he was doing

"Hey there, Roman. I wanted to talk with you,"

"About?"

"Why you seem suddenly so happy to do farm work, last night made it sound like you hated even the thought of it,"

"Oh.. well, I realized something, when I was with the cows, and it got me into a better mood about all of this," He got the last carrot, and stood up with the basket, "Eighteen carrots, where do I put em now?" Looked at Janus with a soft smile

"I'll take em, you can go get a break. Though before that, what was the realization?" He took the basket, counting the carrots just to be sure

"Nothing like, earth shattering or somethin like that, just that this is what makes Remus happy, and no reason to be a Debby downer about having to work here to get to see him, and possibly make him less happy,"

"You really care huh?"

"What? Did you think I came all the way here, walked almost three miles up hill, carrying almost a hundred pound bags, in the summer, in the south, at noon, and didn't care about him?"

"Fair enough," Janus said with a simple shrug, "Just don't want him to get hurt again, you can understand that," Roman nodded, saying a goodbye to Janus before heading over to the chickens to see Remus, who currently had near ten around his feet, flannel now tied around his waist, showing hia dark grey tank-top now

"Hey Rem!" Roman greeted Remus happily looking at him

"Hey Ro-Bro, you done for the day?"

"Yeah Jan said-" Remus pointed at Roman, and the chickens started at him, causing Roman to run away. He couldn't believe he was being chased by chickens, that his brother had sicked on him!

Remus doubled over laughing, cackling like this was the funniest thing to ever happen. After Roman running around, nearly getting pecked, Remus stopped the chickens, putting them back in the coop, "S-So-" Remus was trying to stop his laughter as he shut the door to the coop, looking down at Roman, who'd fallen. He took a breath, "So, how about we head inside, get cleaned up, and start dinner for tonight?"

"Are you even allowed to cook??"

"Not alo-hone!" He sang, offering Roman his hand. Roman smiled a bit, and took it, standing up

"Hey guys!" A jolly voice said, as they got the mats set up, the fire being started by Janus. Roman looked over, to see the baker, a man shorter than the twins, circular glasses, with a buff kind of dad bod, and also had a bag of treats

"Patty!" Remus headed over, hugging him. Patton hugged him back tightly, starting to happily talk with to him. Not long later, Virgil and Logan joined them, Virgil having a guitar with him

As the sun set, and the fire was their only light in the quickly cooling area, they ended up getting closer. Patton holding Remus close as they ate their hotdogs, Janus and Logan leaning on each other, giving occasional kisses. Virgil and Roman sat close, a blanket similar to the ones the other pairs had, wrapped around them. Virgil started to play a song on his guitar, a sweet song that just emphasized the tender moment

Roman could see why Remus liked it here, especially when he looked up. The sky was as clear as crystal, stars dotting the deep rich blue, "Woah.." He leaned against the string bean of a person that is Virgil

"Mhm.." Virgil hummed, continuing to play. The fire lit all of their faces, showing that each of them were happy. Roman could get used to this, even if it did mean climbing up a hill each day to get back from town, even with the hard work, even if there were fights. Moments like this were worth every second of it

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Care and Keeping of Dumbasses

Prompts: Some Remus or Janus angst with the other sides helping them out? Bonus points if it's the two of them suffering together, trying to protect each other (and failing) only for the others to come around and pull them out of the darkness before they drown. Virgil even understanding cause he knows how if feels when the darkness "corrupts" and tries to "destroy" and make them "unsympathetic".

DRLAMP is my fave! Sorry for the long request and strange idea! I'm new to your work and I'm in love with it! - anon

Tbh the name of your latest sanders sides fic made me think of my blankie which I’ve had since forever and can’t sleep without. What if one of the sides (such as like Virgil or Logan or even Janus) had some kind of security blanket/stuffie that they kept hidden bc they want to be taken seriously but when doing group sleepovers they always can’t sleep bc they don’t have their security item? (Feel free to do whatever you want with the prompt lol I love your work!!!!!) <3 - renjunstolemykidneys

Hi, if prompts are open, could you write a sequel to Care and Keeping of Idiots, maybe with the light sides taking care of the dark sides ? - anon

Read on Ao3 Part 1

Warnings: fear of darkness

Pairings: dlampr, can be platonic or romantic I really don't care

Word Count:

The Dark Sides have their work cut out for them.

As it turns out, the Light Sides do too.

“Janus?”

Janus turns the flinch into a simple quirk of his brow, straightening his gloves behind his back as he turns to face the intruder. He tilts his chin up, gazing at Patton down his nose and letting out a dissatisfied sound.

“My, my,” he sighs, “far be it from the days where people used to knock before entering my room.”

Patton raps the door lightly.

“By all means, come in.”

Patton steps inside, shutting the door behind him. Janus leans back in his chair, one hand curled up by his face as he crosses his legs, the others frantically pulling on their gloves under the cloak. He tilts his head back and purses his lips.

“What brings you here,” he drawls, “surely it can’t be anything important.”

“You haven’t come down to eat for a week,” Patton says softly, his voice void of anything that belongs in this room, “I’m worried.”

“How touching.”

“Janus,” Patton says patiently, walking taking a step forward, “I’m here because you told me to be here.”

“Oh, come now,” he chuckles, standing up and running a finger under Patton’s chin, “are you still believing every word I say?”

He leans closer, waiting for Patton to flinch.

“Good.”

Patton barely blinks, his hand coming up to take Janus’s in his, pulling it away from his face.

“You can’t frighten me,” he says, still speaking far too softly for Janus, “and you can’t make me leave.”

“Oh, can’t I?”

The familiar lie of Deceit washes over his tongue, thousands and thousands of words flooding into his mouth as he tilts his head.

“Can’t I, Patton,” he says, looming over the other Side, “can’t I make you leave?”

He looks down at their clasped hands, turning them slightly as if to mock the way the darkness wants to cling to Patton.

“Can’t I tell you that everything you’ve ever hoped for is a lie,” he murmurs, “or that it’s contributing to Thomas being hurt worse than we ever thought possible?”

Patton is quiet.

“Can’t I just use you,” he continues, another hand coming up to ghost past his cheek, “the way I did Roman? Use you up and throw you out the minute you don’t blindly comply with my plans anymore?”

Deceit curls his mouth into a smile.

“Can’t I drag you down with me,” Deceit hums, “down into the depths where you’d never escape? I could fill your mind with the worst thing you can imagine, have you second-guess everything you think you know…you’d never leave.”

He leans close enough to whisper in Patton’s ear.

“Can’t I make you leave,” he whispers, “can’t I make you?”

Patton is silent, Deceit still looming heavily in the room, and then he chuckles.

“No, Janus, you can’t.”

And then warm, warm arms are around him and Deceit stumbles, his hold of his tongue slipping away faster than he can recognize it, leaving Janus slumped in the embrace. Patton makes a shushing noise, quickly switching his grip to support the dead weight.

“It’s okay, sweetheart, it’s over now.”

Janus’s hands come up to shakily grip at Patton’s shirt, the gloves still a little haphazardly tugged on. Patton turns his head into the crook of Janus’s neck and Janus shudders.

“You told me to come,” Patton murmurs, stroking his hand up and down Janus’s back, “if I ever felt Thomas’s heart start to hurt like this, you told me to come.”

Because Janus could lie, lie, lie, to everyone including himself, but Thomas would feel it hurt somewhere.

“You came,” he says through a sluggish tongue, “you…you came.”

“Of course,” comes the immediate reply, “of course I did.”

Janus closes his eyes and just breathes. Breathes and lets the rush of light chase away the shadows still snatching at his back.

“Pat—Patton?”

“I’m here, sweetheart,” Patton murmurs, “I’ve got you.”

“Thank you,” he gasps, “I…I didn’t think that would happen.”

“Bad brain days happen to everyone,” Patton assures, “and we’ll be here for you when they do.”

He pulls back after another moment, patting Janus’s shoulder.

“Now come downstairs and eat. It’s your favorite.”

—————————————

Some people think that because Remus is most often seen in the darkness, he isn’t afraid of it.

That isn’t true. Rather, it is precisely because Remus is most often seen in the darkness that he is afraid of it.

The darkness knows him. Knows him inside and out and would love nothing more than an excuse to turn him into nothing more than a shadow, part of its mass. He lies awake at night when it threatens the very corners of his existence, always watching, always waiting.

“Remus?”

Remus bolts upright, startled from the sudden interruption, only to see Logan at the door. Logan tilts his head.

“Are you alright?”

“…Lolo?”

“It’s me, little one,” Logan says softly, raising his hands as he walks across the floor, “we’re in the mansion you and Roman created, it’s alright.”

That’s right. It was sleepover night and the twins were hosting. Remus swallows, throat suddenly dry as Logan eases his weight down onto the bed.

“You don’t seem to be alright,” he says softly, “would you like to tell me what’s going on?”

Remus swallows again. Logan knows. Logan knows, he’s talked about it with Logan before. Logan—Logan can help.

“It’s the dark,” Remus mumbles, hiding his face as it burns in shame, “I—I can’t stop it.”

“Oh, you poor thing…” Logan reaches out to cup his face gently. “Do you want me to help?”

Remus nods, shamelessly burying his cheek in the warmth of Logan’s hand. For a moment, Logan lets him.

Then he pulls away, leaving Remus staggered by the loss.

“You have ten seconds to run,” he says, “and then I’m coming to catch you.”

He bolts upright. “Wh-what?”

“You have ten seconds to run,” he repeats, a smile crawling across his face, “and then I’m going to come and catch you.”

“What will you do with me once you catch me?”

The smile glimmers with shadow. “If you don’t start running, you’ll find out in ten…nine…”

He runs.

His heart pounds in his chest as he stumbles out of the sheet, the shadows nipping at his heels, delighting in the way he plows through them. The house yawns, luring him down, down, down into the dark, through the halls, down the staircases, racing across marble floors. He scarcely feels the chill under his bare feet. His breath rings in his ears. The shadows flock to him.

He’s coming. He can feel Logan behind him. A string punctures his navel, through the small of his back, winding through the manor, straight into his hands. He can feel him. He can feel him. He can hear him. The fear ices over his hands, his arms, his legs, his feet, down to his very core. He pants. He stumbles. He hits the ground. He gets up. He runs.

The light flickers.

In the bowels of the mansion lie doors not illuminated by candlelight. He tears through the rooms and disappears into the blackness. Here, the shadows surround him, urging him deeper. He can feel his eyes on him, his hands reaching, grasping, just behind him. He rushes and plunges further, deeper, faster.

The room he rushes into is pitch black.

He stops, breathing hard, his chest heaving from the force of running too far, too fast. In the blackness, he can’t tell if he’s staring at a wall or at another ballroom, yawning around him. The shadows wriggle with glee as the door slowly creaks shut. He can feel it. Every nerve in his body tingles, searching for something, anything, anyone…

Slowly, so slowly, he begins to walk forward, arms outstretched, stumbling a little as he creeps into the room. The shadows blanket him, wriggling into every little nook and cranny. They shroud the fear with their icy tongues, molding it to his skin, sculpting him with their clever fingers. His fingers brush something, a door? No, a cabinet. He turns the knob. Reaches inside. Space. Empty space. A haven in the darkness.

He keeps moving, exploring the vast room. It truly is vast, stretching further and further away from the door. Is he still walking straight? Where did he come from? He can’t tell anymore.

“Little one~”

His next inhale is almost a scream before he claps his hand over his mouth. There’s something large next to him. He ducks down, cowering against it.

“Come out, come out, wherever you are~”

A door.

Light.

A silhouette.

He keeps his hand over his mouth as Logan steps inside, leaving the door open, letting the light stream in. A lure. A trap. His footsteps move slowly around the room. It’s a…parlor, of some sort?

Logan crosses the threshold, walking over the creaking floor. Remus moves, sticking to the places where the floor has settled. The wood splinters and threatens to catch on his hands. Logan walks closer and closer.

Remus ducks around the edge of a couch and shimmies up against a shelf, pressing his back to the wood. He can’t hear him. Where is he? He’s not moving. There are no footsteps. Is he still here? Did he leave?

Is this another trap?

Peering around the corner, his heart in his throat, he looks furiously for any sign of him. The door sits there, innocently open, shining its light into the room. From where she is, he can’t see him.

“Where are you,” he whispers, barely audible to even himself, “where are you?”

“Here.”

A scream tears itself out of his throat as he startles horribly, nearly knocking over the shelf as he races to make it to the door. He grabs his shirt and he wrenches away, diving out and racing to make it to the stairs.

He hits the first step and stumbles. The string in his navel snaps taut, slowing him down, holding his legs. Another grab and he pulls with all his might. Again, he gets away. It isn’t until the third tug that he realizes what he’s doing.

He’s taunting him. Teasing him by letting him get away over and over. He can grab him easily and he’s letting him know. He draws out the chase, making him dance, letting him run, snatching every last bit of hope that he might get away with a quick tug to the back of his shirt.

Hopelessness draws the fear up, into his throat, pressing against where it settled over his eyes. Fat tears threaten to roll down his cheeks as he pants louder, each inhale just about a whine as he closes in. He’s tiring. Logan can feel it.

This tug sends him careening into a wall. The next one threatens to send him to the ground entirely. The third one succeeds.

He wails as he topples, his body smacking into the carpet. Logan lifts his foot to step onto the folds of fabric pooling between his knees, trapping him neatly in place. He all but convulses on the floor in front of him. His panting breaths ring in the hallway, still scrabbling to get away. Logan lets him tire himself out, slumping with his arms spread wide.

“I’ve caught you, little one,” Logan says softly, “and now…I shall claim my prize.”

Remus strains against the iron heel pressed against the floor. He struggles, he flails, his eyes wide, pleading, begging, no, please, don’t, let me go—

“That was not the deal, my dear,” Logan interrupts smoothly, even as he strains against his hold, “I have caught you.”

He kneels over his shaking, prone form, bending down. His hair catches in his palm as he presses himself into the floor, hoping to slip away, to escape whatever fate must befall him. The fear ices him in place, the shadows retreating to peer out from the corners. He leans down, closer, closer, closer—

—to drop a kiss onto his cheek.

“Thank you, little one,” he whispers.

“That…that’s all?”

“That’s all, little one,” he repeats, smiling gently, “and now…now let go.”

The ice shatters.

The fear has nowhere to go. It shifted, honed itself into a suit of armor to encase him, to move him, puppet him through the halls tied to Logan’s hand, only to have nothing to protect against. Instead, it pours off of him in rivulets, then streams, as tears from his eyes, as horrible tremors that wrack his every muscle, in cries that ring out into the still air around them. Logan picks him up out of the corpse of the armor, cradling him like a babe in his arms as he walks. He only sobs harder.

“Shh, shh,” Logan murmurs, “let’s get the rest of the shadow off of you.”

He lays Remus down in his bed, the warm light from the nightstand chasing the shadow away.

“We focused your fear,” Logan explains, rubbing Remus’s shoulders to help him warm up, “and then released it. Like a horror movie; you have the catharsis of being scared safely. They can’t touch you anymore, little one, I promise.”

Remus leans his head into Logan’s chest and just breathes.

Logan stays with him for the rest of the night.

—————————————

Virgil knows what it’s like to be the hated side.

He knows, he does. He knows what it’s like to have nothing but pure, unadulterated disgust spewed at you from every corner of the internet. He knows what it’s like to dread to see something come up where you have to go because you know you’re going to spend the entire time wincing and flinching, if not on the outside then definitely on the inside.

He knows and now…now he knows what it’s like for that to not be a thing.

He knows what it’s like to be cared about. He knows what it’s like to have people checking in on you, he knows what it feels like to be checked up on. He knows what it’s like when someone knows what you like or don’t like, he knows, he knows.

He can go ask Patton for advice. He can spend hours upon hours just sitting with Logan. He can shamelessly bury his face in Roman’s arm until he laughs and sets aside his work to spoil Virgil with attention.

He knows what it’s like to be trapped in the dark, under the heel of the people who’d rather not see you unless it’s to watch you crash and burn. He knows what it’s like to be seen as only the bad thing you represent, making it worse and worse and worse until it consumes you.

So he grits his teeth, buries himself up to the elbow in darkness, and heaves with all his might to get the others out.

He drags Janus up from the web of lies and parks him in the middle of the couch to be drawn into conversations he doesn’t even try to follow. He shoves aside the monsters trying to tear Remus to shreds and unleashes Roman onto them, watching the brothers fight.

And it’s so much better.

It’s so much better to not drown in the sludge of hatred. It’s so much better to just be here, themselves, and not what they represent.

…that doesn’t mean everything’s gone, though.

Virgil is Anxiety, to a certain extent, and there’s no getting around that. He still gets nervous when things happen, he’ll still get the feeling that he needs to run, he needs to hide, he needs to fight. And yes, he still gets nervous that one day, everyone will realize he’s actually awful and he’ll be left alone, in the dark.

So he keeps certain things to himself.

He doesn’t tell anyone about the stacks of snack food he has stashed around the Mindscape. He doesn’t tell anyone about the spare hoodie he never takes out of the laundry room.

He definitely doesn’t tell anyone he still sleeps with a blanket.

The other Sides have comfort objects. Logan went on a whole impassioned rant about them once, when Thomas had overheard some mom in a grocery store bragging about how early she’d been able to get her children to give up their stuffed animals. Something about how forcing someone to give up a comfort object before they were ready leading to the development of long-term issues, not to mention the violation of their privacy.

Intellectually, Virgil knows that if the others were to find out he sleeps with a blanket, nothing bad would happen.

Emotionally, every time there’s a movie night, Virgil stays doggedly awake, counting the seconds until it’s time to get up. Even when the others are dozing around him, Janus’s head on his shoulder, Patton’s head in his lap, he stays awake. He passes his darkened eyes off as more eyeshadow, residual from something, and retreats to his room where he can bury his face in his bed and sleep.

Of course, eventually, someone finds out.

“Virgil,” Roman calls when they’re left alone in the living room while the others are getting everything ready for movie night, “why do you never sleep during these?”

Virgil freezes. “Don’t know what you mean, Princey.”

Roman sighs slightly but there’s no weight behind it. “If you don’t want to tell me, I’ll back off, but don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about.”

Virgil curses.

“Don’t let Patton hear that,” Roman teases, coming up beside him and bumping their shoulders together, “what’s up, Dark and Stormy?”

Virgil balls his fists inside his hoodie. Roman waits, patiently, until he mumbles something.

“Hmm?”

“I just can’t.”

“Is it the fact that we’re in the living room? I’m sure the others would be happy to—“

“It’s not that.”

“Is it…all of us? Cat piles can be a lot of sensory input.”

Virgil shakes his head. Roman lays a hand gently on his elbow.

“Then what?”

Fuck it.

“Don’t have my blanket.”

Roman looks confused. “Your weighted one? You can bring that if you want, Virgil, no one would mind.”

Virgil shakes his head, valiantly ignoring the heat in his face. “My blanket.”

“Your…” A look of understanding crosses Roman’s face. “Virgil, you’re allowed to bring a comfort object with you if you want to.”

He huffs.

“I mean it,” he says, gently turning Virgil to face him. “If anyone’s rude to you about it, I’ll kick their ass.”

A smile tugs at the corner of Virgil’s mouth. “Don’t let Patton hear you say that.”

“I will happily sacrifice all the money in the world to the swear jar,” Roman vows dramatically, “if that is what it takes.”

Virgil can’t help it, he laughs. Roman laughs too, before carefully coaxing Virgil into a hug.

“You’ll be fine,” he promises, “I’ll bring mine too.”

“Bring what?” They look up to see Remus and Logan holding so many pillows. “Pillows? We got you.”

“Nah,” Roman says easily, “I just forgot my comfort object. I’m actually trying to sleep tonight.”

“Oh, shit, I forgot mine too.”

Logan adjusts his glasses. “As did I. Meet back here in five?”

Roman tips Virgil a wink as they leave the living room. Virgil lets himself smile.

He’s able to sleep fine that night.

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[naminethewriter]

This Once And Never Again

My last entry for Dukeceit Week 2021 if finally done! I’m so happy I finished it 🥰 Thanks to @dukeceitweek for organizing this and thank you to everyone who read along, commented, reblogged and left tags, you are all amazing! 😍😍😍 Now I hope you enjoy this last story as well! 💛💚

Here on Ao3

Characters: Janus, Remus

Relationship: romantic Dukeceit

Rating: T

Words: 1,287

Summary: Why had he agreed to do this again? He should’ve just said no, it was a stupid plan anyway.

Janus fingers danced on the wheel nervously. The black gloves felt wrong on his hands. As did his hair stuffed under the also black beanie on his head. In general, he did not feel very comfortable in his current outfit. Or this car. A rental. Also black. Borrowed under a fake name and he had no intention of returning it to the dealer he had gotten it from. The sound of cars passing by in front of the small driveway he was parked in and the tap, tap, tap of his fingers on the wheel were the only noise. The radio was turned off, as were the lights and the engine. Appearing to be empty unless you took a closer look.

Janus checked his watch. Shouldn’t be long now. The make-up on his face was itchy. It felt uncomfortable and wrong, just like the clothes. Why had he agreed to do this again? He should’ve just said no, it was a stupid plan anyway. His eyes wandered back to his wrist. Not even a minute had passed. If Remus wasn’t here in the next 15 minutes, Janus was free to leave. But for now, he waited.

 Time seemed to move so slowly. Janus was usually calm even in stressful situations but this had his anxiety going wild. It really was a stupid plan. And an entirely unnecessary one to boot. It was only a few months, they’ve gone through worse! Literally! Remus had been gone for a year once. Granted they hadn’t been together then but still. Janus was nothing if not patient. His partner was anything but.

 A sound, from up above. Janus glanced out of the slightly open window but he couldn’t see anything unless he left the car. After all, the buildings to the sides of the small driveway were at least five floors high. Another sound. Another look at the watch. The timing matched. Clattering, then a thump as something landed in front of the car. Or rather: someone.

 Remus’ agility was still somewhat baffling to Janus. He had checked the walls beforehand, how Remus got down from one of the roofs without getting hurt was beyond him. His boyfriend stood up straight, dusted himself off before grinning at Janus who rolled his eyes in response. Remus looks have gotten even wilder over the last few months. His hair longer, not only on his head but on his face. The moustache was now part of a beard. Janus was not a fan. With a few quick steps, Remus was at the window.

 “Hey, danger noodle~” he singsonged while wiggling his eyebrows. Janus fixed him with an unimpressed stare.

 “Get in the back, I want out of these clothes as soon as possible.”

 “You haven’t seen me in four months and that’s the love I get?”

 “Yes, because you dragged me into your stupid plan, now go!” Janus hissed and closed the window. Remus pouted at him for a few more seconds, before he moved behind the car, opened the trunk and slipped inside. Once Janus was certain that he had closed the lid properly, he started the car and calmly drove onto the street, the sound of sirens in the background.

   The drive was thankfully quick and without incident. The couple police cars that crossed their way didn’t seem to find a reason to stop and check them. So after around 20 minutes, Janus pulled into a garage on the other edge of the small city. Once he exited the car, he checked that the shutter had closed properly behind him before he turned on the light and opened the trunk.

 “I really don’t know how you can act so stupid and still get so damn lucky,” Janus scolded his boyfriend, who grinned at him before climbing out.

 “I wish I knew, Jan-Jan! Then I could go and thank whoever made me so lucky that I have you in my life.” Remus delivered that awful, cheesy line with so much confidence, Janus almost forgot to be annoyed with him. Almost. Remus had moved closer, his face only inches from Janus’ own until he was pushed away, a black gloved hand on his cheek.

 “Shut up, you corny rat. I need to get out of this outfit.” Janus moved away, grabbing the bag that had been left by a door that led out of the garage and further into the building. He turned back around for a moment, hand already on the doorknob. “And you dear, need a shave.” Remus giggled and quickly followed his partner out of the room, turning off the light when he left. The rental remained, in a now empty garage, keys left in the ignition.

   It took Janus another 15 minutes to get out of the offending clothes, let down her hair and braid it, pick an outfit she liked from the few options she had packed, get the make-up covering her vitiligo off and decide to change the charm on her bracelet to indicate female pronouns. She felt so much better with a hat more her style, a loose blouse and knee-long skirt, slender shoes and her trusted yellow gloves. Once she was satisfied, she went to check on Remus.

 Her boyfriend was already dressed and shaven when she came in and frowned at himself in the mirror. And Janus had to agree, he almost looked worse than before. Without a hair left on his lower face and dressed in the trademark red shirt and white skinny jeans of his brother, Remus looked pretty bizarre. The only remaining difference between him and Roman was the wild hair. Remus’ eyes met Janus in the mirror.

 “I look gross.” Janus nodded.

 “But it was your plan, so no complaining.”

 “What’s the fun of it if I can’t?” Remus whined. His girlfriend sighed.

 “Just let me cut your hair so we can get out of here?”

 “Kisses first?”

 “Fine,” Janus sighed but she couldn’t deny how good it felt to feel Remus’ lips on her own again. Apparently he had also had the time to brush his teeth, a nice surprise. They simply stood there for a minute, locking lips but once Remus tried to get his tongue involved, Janus pulled back.

 “That’s enough. We have a long drive, let me finish your look.” Remus pouted but obliged, sitting down on a stool while Janus got out the scissors and electric razor. Janus worked in silence for a bit before commenting: “Roman is going to be so mad at you once he comes back from his trip.”

 “When’s that going to be?”

 “They planned to stay for five days, so three more.”

 “And he got Daddy, Nerdy Wolverine and Spiderling to come along?”

 “Yes and I don’t know how he managed that. I also don’t know how you convinced him that he should go on a ‘no technology camping trip’. And with perfect timing for your little stunt as well.” Remus grinned.

 “I don’t kiss and tell, Jannie, you know that.” Janus scoffed.

 “The less I know, the better, probably. But I brought Roman’s phone, wallet and perfume, so you should have no trouble convincing anyone that you’re him if we’re stopped.”

 “My, my, J-anus. Stealing my brother’s clothes and papers? You are so naughty~” Janus paused to hit him on the head lightly.

 “Just to be clear: this is the first and last time I help you break out of jail. When you get arrested next time, you’re on your own. And who in their right mind plans to break out in broad daylight?”

 “I got away with it, didn’t I?” Remus grinned.

 “We’re not home yet, don’t jinx it.”

 “Yeah, yeah. Love you, Jan.”

 “Love you, too, you idiot.”

[clemjolichose]

Here is the one-shot for the prompt of @korruptbrekker. It's short, but I had to make researchs for that and it's late. I had lots of fun!

To submit a prompt, see that post.

TW meat/food, dead animal and mention of fire?

Janus never, in all of his abnormally long life, thought he'd find himself knee-deep in rotisserie chicken, but there was a first time for everything he supposed.

"Remind me again- where does this chicken come from? he asked Remus, trying to remain calm, but he had so, so much questions.

-Oh, it's not a chicken. Well- not really. It's more of a big chicken, think emu, you know, those wreckless flightless birds who won over some dumb humans! But it still got wings and all so I guess it's a chicken? Remus ranted, trying to cover his mistake with useless informations."

Janus sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, crossing his arm over his chest.

"In all honesty, what the fuck, Remus. Where does it come from? Why is it this- this big?!"

Remus laughed and leant down to take a piece of barely cooked chicken and eat it.

"Well, I'm bored, I don't like going hunting everyday so I thought that maybe- maybe, as the two time-travellers entity we are, whose diet is mainly composed of meat, maybe- and I say it again- maybe, we needed something bigger. You know, stocking up."

Janus looked at him with all the disgust he could summon at this instant, and it was a lot. He tried to move away but could barely walk.

"Where did you find it, Remus? he asked again, losing his temper.

-In some woods. Trees were giants like my weiner."

Janus exhaled and then:

"WOO! You're acting like an idiot while, I know it, remember you can't lie to me, you know exactly what I meant. When. Does. This. Bird. Come. From."

He sounded threatening and even Remus had chills listening to his cold voice filled with anger. He whispered:

"The Mesozoic era..."

Janus blinked a few times, taking it in.

"Are you fucking kidding me?

-No! There were those giant birds in Australie- almost three meters high! Four hundred kilos! I can't believe I actually brought him here...

-So you're telling me there is, right now, four hundred kilograms of meat under our feet??

-More like on our feet though- Remus corrected, getting smacked on the back of the head.

-How did you cook it?

-Oh, trust me, it's not cooked. I just tasted it and it's raw as fuck, Remus declared, kicking the meat to show how pink it was."

Janus had enough. He couldn't believe Remus was this dense, this... his ageless boyfriend was stupid. The dumbest person that ever walked on earth. The most unhinged being this universe has seen. And yet, he was in love. He should call himself moronsexual by now...

"You put it on fire, didn't you?

-Yeah, I did that, Remus acquiesced."

And Janus couldn't do anything except laughing, because how ridiculous it was to be swimming in some prehistoric barely cooked bird meat in his own house? He shook his head.

"Clean it up, organise the meat, I'll take care of the cooking."

And yet, Janus decided to roll with it. After thousands of years of putting up with Remus's shit, he was still surprised. If he was being honest, he felt lucky. Remus was undeniably the best thing that has happened to him in his oh so long life, because this man made sure the days never looked alike. And he was very good at that...