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mysticsparklewings · 1 year

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Three Cheers for Harmonic Revenge (+ Time Lapse!)

________ This is what happens when you're a fan of both Winx Club and My Chemical Romance, apparently! 😂 Truly a labor of love—I started on this for an MCR album anniversary on June 8th. I so missed the date, but I had to see it through!

⭐️ AND I've got a Time Lapse of the art coming together, featuring my very rough attempt at a matchup of MCR's Helena and the Winx Club Harmonix song as backing music! It's a wild ride! ⭐️ (...There's also an unlisted version with "normal" music just in case my less-than-amateur audio editing skills are too much for anyone. 😅)

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Anyway, to make a very long story a little bit shorter, a few weeks ago I ended up down a bit of a rabbit hole trying to identify likely sources of inspiration for the thing to come out of Winx Club Season 5 that the fandom at large actually kind of loves: Harmonix. I went in thinking Ballet, and despite my best efforts came out with that opinion pretty much unchanged.

Not long after, but for the entirely unrelated reason of Being An MCR Fan on The Internet, I ended up looking at some screenshots from their Helena music video. [I think this was prompted by a Reddit post asking about the dress for cosplay purposes, I'm not sure.]

It was then I had the thought, so simple and off-handed: "I don't see how you can look at a ballet outfit like this and not think Harmonix was ballet-inspired."

If you've ever seen a TV show or cartoon where a character says something, and then only after the words leave their mouth do they realize the implications/meaning of what they just said, that was me in that moment. 😱

On the one hand, I want to say "I can't believe I didn't see the similarities before," but on the other...Well, I can believe it, actually. Comparing Winx and MCR in almost any capacity is not a natural thing to do, even with a Ballet connection in each. The fact that I finally did notice came largely down to the serendipity of being a fan of both and just happening upon the Helena pictures not long after spending an abnormal amount of time looking for clothes that look like Harmonix. I think there are many points leading up to that moment where if just a couple of things had gone differently, I still wouldn't have noticed.

Either way, once the connection was made in my brain it took all of about 10 seconds for "Helena as a Harmonix Fairy" to follow. 🤩

At the time, I didn't have immediate plans to act on it. It was just an idea to be filed away on the little shelf in my brain where I keep "Things that would be fun to draw eventually." [That shelf is super full and in danger of collapse, for what it's worth. 😉]

Earlier this month, that changed when I remembered June 8th is the Anniversary for Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge, the album that Helena comes from, and I had yet to come up with any other plans or ideas to commemorate it this year.

Now, clearly I ended up missing that deadline, and two others I set for myself afterward. Things have just been very chaotic around my house for last 3-ish months or so, and June has been no different. Other IRL things just had to take priority. 😔

In my defense, the art itself was finished on June 12th. This description here and the Time Lapse Video (mostly the video) were what really set me back, even aside from household chaos. But it was really important to me to get a video done for this piece, so getting that done vs. getting the art out faster was the trade I made.

But part of the reason I bring this up to underline that originally, I thought I was on a fairly tight deadline. As a result, during the planning stage I didn't really have time to tinker with refining the base design or debating details like I normally would. So I drew from the Winx's own Harmonix designs as much as possible—picking out pieces that naturally resembled the structure of Helena's dress.

If I'd had more time to noodle around...the structure probably would've been largely the same, but the details most likely would have changed to help it feel more original, and I may have gotten crazy enough to try and find a happy [lighter] grey medium between Harmonix's pastel palettes and Helena's stark black and red.

As it stands though, I'm not unhappy with how that all turned out, I just think it's worth noting how the visual concept may have changed if I'd had more time to toy with it. [Especially for when Future Me ends up referring back to this description; Hi there Future Mystic 👋]

Since my process for making the art can both be seen in the Time Lapse and is something you've all seen/heard me describe before by now [I think I have finally nailed down a fairly standard "Winx Art Process" over the last few months in large part thanks to Winxsona Winter—which yes, I do still intend to eventually finish], instead of taking you through the general stuff again, I'm going to do a bullet-point list similar to one I did for Sirenix.

The main difference is this time, it's more focused my observations for what similarities exist between Harmonix and Helena's costume, as opposed to just a list of Harmonix traits and how I handled them. [Though there will still some of that too, naturally.]

Most notably, both feature "fluffy" layered skirts. Harmonix skirts don't really look like the same fabric texture, but that could be either a stylistic/animation choice or could be chalked up to there also probably being some Wedding Dress inspiration in the designs alongside the Ballet elements. Also, at first I didn't think the train on the Harmonix skirts was a similarity, but upon a closer look at the Helena music video...Helena's skirt is definitely longer and train-like in the back, so...Cool, I was wrong! 😄 And: As it turns out, Bloom's Harmonix skirt actually does have a small section that's ruffled a bit differently from the rest—It's just really hard to tell because on her, it's all the same pastel blue color. But as you can see, referencing that part of her skirt here to incorporate the Red underlayer that peaks through on Helena's skirt worked a treat! 😊 P.S. Wow I really hated drawing a lot of really tightly-confined ruffles like this. 😤 And trying to shade them was even worse! 🙃

Both feature form-fitting tops with minimal or no straps. I more specifically saw Helena similarities in Stella's Harmonix top [with the frills over the bust and structure lines below], and later I realized the top-most portion of Musa's has an even more similar kind of frill. To that end, Helena's is once again definitely supposed to be something transparent like tulle, but since there really aren't any transparent fabric portions of Harmonix, I chose instead to use a slightly lighter near-black to give it a similar effect without breaking that Harmonix "rule." Also, the bodice portion is a true jet black with no shading. I tried the more typical near-black grey that could be shaded at first, but it just wasn't doing it for me. I tried this on a whim and decided it looked good enough to keep.

Most of the Harmonix designs have a kind of "belt" that connects the bodice to the skirt; Perfect match for Helena's red one! Similarly, most of those same Harmonix designs have a "belt"/ribbon just under the bust as well. Helena does not, as far as I can tell. But I chose to add a read one here for a little extra variety and helping break up all that black.

The Harmonix shoes are almost entirely ribbons winding up the legs; Helena wears black ballet slippers with, you guessed it, black strings/ribbons that wind around her feet and ankles. Now, maybe I could have gotten away with all-black ribbons and black for the heel portion of the shoes, but 1. The Harmonix designs all use 2 colors for the ribbons and the heel is usually in the "contrasting" color. 2. I knew from the beginning that the skirt train [a mandatory aspect of Harmonix] was going to either be black or a very dark grey, and even during the Concept phase before I had a specific pose in mind, I had a feeling the ribbon tails were going to overlap with said train. So I used a dark red. Originally, it was about as bright as her sash and belt, but then I realized Bloom and Musa's pink ribbons were darker than the pink used in the bodices, a darker red would be closer to the original black anyway, and that would yet again add just a tiny bit more visual variety. One last note about the shoes: I did my best to match the original winding of Helena's shoe ribbon, except for the very first ribbon across where the toes connect to the rest of the foot. That strap was specifically added as a nod to how Helena's proper ballet slippers outright cover the toe.

About the train: Similar to the bodice, I started out with the train in one color, the color you currently see for the skirt itself and the very top of the train. It was fine but I was itching for some more variety, so after reassuring myself "Layla/Aisha's train has a few different shades of green instead of being solid so it's fine," I used the different tiers [taken from Flora's train] to create a little bit of a gradient from the black to a charcoal grey. It kinda works as a hint toward Harmonix's more pastel palette. Sort of.

Aside from Tecna, all the girls' hair is at least partially pulled back in Harmonix. This sorta works out because it appears the front "bang" sections of Helena's hair are pulled back. [In my brain I call this "Doll Hair" because I personally have seen that kind of look way more often on dolls than on real people.] It's similar to the front of Bloom's Enchantix hair. The rest of Helena's hair appears pretty thick and a little wild, so I tried to incorporate a bit of that here, but I couldn't push it too far without "breaking" the Winx Style. And while I'm here: I did choose to make Helena's hair a very dark brown. In the video, most of the time it does just look plain black, but there are moments where my eyes pick up on a "warmth" to the color, which makes me think maybe it really is that super-dark brown hair that just looks black. Even if it isn't, I stand by my choice as slightly more fitting for the Winx style, since Winx almost never does truly black hair anyway.

All of the Harmonix designs feature some sort of small head accessory, usually a tiara. Helena's costume very prominently features netting over the face...And there appears to be something going on towards the back of her head, presumably whatever is holding the netting in place. I've seen fan interpretations of whatever that is being flowers [usually black roses], and since Tecna has a few flower-ish pieces as part of her Harmonix tiara, that seemed like a fair choice here. As for the netting...You'll see very briefly in the Time Lapse that during the concept phase, I really did want to include that, but it was too hard to ignore how out of place it felt. Winx rarely does anything with netting in the first place [though a couple of rare examples do exist], and considering certain parts of Harmonix feel like it was designed to be fairly simple [but look complex at first glance, which it does]...I just couldn't do it. So instead, I...Well, it ended up being almost a copy of Layla's Harmonix tiara, but I really truly did not realize how similar what I was doing was to hers until after the full-color version was pretty much done. 😅 I thought I was doing more of an upside-down version of Musa's, and my entire goal was to just do something that came down over the forehead like the netting did.

Speaking of Musa, if those wings look familiar, they kinda should. Remember before that I mentioned I was originally working on a pretty tight timeline for this piece?

One of the things that has proven to take me the longest with original Winx designs since I picked up making them semi-regularly again is undoubtedly the wings. I got to really learn that the hard way with Believix at the beginning of this year.

Because of the very limited time I thought I had and my sluggish pace with wings, when while collecting Harmonix screenshots for reference I noticed "Hey, Musa's wings would still work pretty well if they were flipped upside down..." A little bit of a lightbulb went off.

I don't even know why exactly that thought occurred to me before I'd even really considered the wings. The best I can figure is a little hangover in my subconscious—At one point I remember reading one of the Winx's Sirenix wings are apparently upside down at the end of her transformation sequence. That stuck out to me at the time because I don't really understand how you could tell if Sirenix wings are upside down or not because of how they're shaped. 🤨

Anyway. So I found a screenshot with a fairly clear shot of one of Musa's wings, flipped it around, and really just traced right over it.

I did make a few small tweaks, and most notably I added some..."Lines of Tears?" like Layla and Flora's have, but at the end of the day they are still really Musa's wings.

Normally, I wouldn't have done that and instead would've just taken heavy inspiration from Musa's wings, but again, I thought I had a lot less time than I really did. And to be fair, plenty of other Winx fans re-color or otherwise re-purpose the Canon Girls' wings for their OCs and/or Fan Transformations on a regular basis anyway, so it's not like this is a totally unheard-of idea or anything. 🤷‍♀️

Much later, I also figured in a way it fits; Musa is a fairy of Music, this artwork is largely based around a specific piece of music/the band that made it; I even opted to add music note shapes like Musa's wings produce [all the Harmonix wings produce specific shapes in that way] when they move to deepen that connection after I thought of it.

Other things worth noting [and this is again a • bullet point list because, frankly, at the moment I'm just too lazy to make this all flow together in more story-like paragraphs]:

I did my best to match Helena's skin and eyes, but her lips and eye makeup were a little trickier. Her lips ended up a bit pinker and not as close to her skin tone in the spirit of Winx, and I had to compromise and use greyish reds shaped like the Trix's eyeshadow to get a similar effect. The eyeshadow still really isn't perfect for Helena or Winx, but I was short on other ideas so, "close enough is good enough."

The shape of the mouth isn't quite what I wanted, either. You'll see in the time-lapse that I already changed it pretty drastically from the first sketch I had. I definitely wanted something open, because while Helena's mouth is not open for the entire music video or anything, it is more open at certain points and this shot in particular is pretty iconic. But I also didn't want anything too crazy because, y'know, Winx Club. The bared teeth and lack of upturn for a smile was my compromise. Either the mouth itself needed some more tweaking, or the eyebrows did. The whole expression is okay, I just don't think I pushed it far enough. 🤷‍♀️

There isn't really one specific pose that represents Helena more than the others [...at least not standing up/dancing], so I picked mostly from a general feeling from the music video. I did reference some official stock arts of the Winx in Ballet attire [mostly this one of Flora], but the feet had to be changed pretty notably to fit the shoes, and overall I had to make some tweaks in the anatomy where the stock art and show style differ. [These differences seem to increase from Season 5 onward, too.]

The background was mostly inspired by Layla's Harmonix, and it might be my favorite part of the whole piece, actually! Upon closer studying for this project, I was surprised by how much "junk" is in some of the Harmonix backgrounds. There's tons of texture in all of them and a fair bit of color variation in most...It's pretty interesting compared to past transformations and even Harmonix itself. The backgrounds end up being a lot more intense than the solid and gentle pastel dresses. [Wouldn't surprise me if that was intentional!] I had a little more work cut out for me since I couldn't just slap bright colors all over the place. I did consider just sticking with blacks/greys/white and maybe some red, but I thought it might help my version of Helena here pop a little better if I was able to change up the palette just a bit. And, of course, the warmth of the background helps add more variety and liven the whole image up. Much more to my delight though, I was able to create the background without having to download any new Procreate brushes! 🥳 Between a couple of default ones, the ocean-themed brushes I already had from previous projects, and a couple I just happened to pick up along the way [mostly as monthly freebies from brush makers who normally charge for their work], I had all the brushes I needed already right there, it just took a little experimenting.

I will reiterate that while it still took time, making the art itself really wasn't so bad or difficult. And it helps that this ridiculous crossover idea was something I really wanted to make—Because if I didn't, who else would, right? 🤪

It's not perfect, sure. But it's here and it still came out pretty good overall, I think. So I'm happy. 😊

Now I would also like to take a moment to explain part of why putting the Time Lapse together for this piece ended up taking longer than it probably should have, because I really didn't have room to talk about it in the video itself...though it does sorta get a mention right at the beginning: The audio.

To once again make a very long story short(er):

I, in my infinite wisdom, decided instead of the usual royalty-free music stock, to try and create a mash-up of Helena and the Harmonix song for this video. That was more or less the visual premise for the art, so why not go all-out with the theming?

For once, I cannot take you through the full nitty-gritty because, at least to my inexperienced brain, audio editing is a pretty nebulous process. But I can tell you that aside from inexperience, the other thing that probably held me back was my choice of program to handle the task.

I did not have the patience nor motivation to try and teach myself how to use an audio program for this one silly project, and I semi-accidentally learned at the beginning of last year that DaVinci Resolve has an entire section dedicated to just editing the audio for videos. Since I was able to fumble my way around in there for the light audio editing I wanted to do at that time, I figured that was a slightly safer bet here. It may not have saved me a ton of time, but it was at least vaguely familiar, and for me, familiarity goes a long way in making me comfortable with a program even if I still don't really know what the heck I'm doing.

This isn't really what DaVinci is supposed to be for—as far as I can tell it doesn't even have an "audio only" export option, which did complicate things a bit—and even if it was, I'm sure any true audiophile will still probably cringe a lot at what I managed to create.😅 I did my best to make it "tolerable" for a listen or two, but I know my ears are inherently biased since I know and enjoy both songs quite a bit already. But I did manage to get feedback from two persons that know notably more about audio than I do, and they weren't horrifically appalled, so I don't feel like I'm committing a crime against music by putting it out there, at least.

Aside from that, the video did also have to wait on me to finish this description [to a certain extent, anyway]. For smaller projects, I can usually write the on-screen notes for the video first and worry about the description later, but most of the time for a big project like this, I need the bulk of this written description done first so I have a baseline of all the things I want to mention and can pare down from there.

I can do a fair bit of the video editing up until the point I need those notes, but once I hit that wall there's really no way around it. And in this case, I did actually use all that other video editing as a form of procrastinating on the description. 😅

Most likely because I knew there was going to be a lot to cover, I really put off like 70% of this description as long as possible. 🫣 The other 30% I actually did relatively soon after the art was ready. The plan was to go ahead and get most of it out of the way, but clearly I lost my writing mojo partway through and had to come back to it later...and I was still a little lazy with certain aspects.

But hey, the description isn't the art, it's just meant to describe the art, so whatever works, yeah?

In any case, I think that's everything I wanted to mention about this particular process. It's been quite a ride, and I'm glad it's over. Mostly so I can go back to working on some other projects I already had cooking before this one came up, but also...I am just glad this is one of those ideas that, as I said much earlier, originally got put on an "eventually" shelf in my brain and actually got to come to fruition fairly quickly after the fact.

Kinda gives me more hope than I previously had for some of those other "eventually" projects, which is nice. 🙂

Similarly: I don't know if I'll find a way to revisit Winx Club x MCR ever again, but I'm thrilled I I found a way to do it at least once! Doubly so that I'm happy with how it turned out! 😊 With that in mind, you never know. It's possible I'll figure out another way to do it again someday.

In the meantime, I leave you Sparklers to enjoy this one and the time lapse [whether you're brave enough for the mash-up version or opt for the "easy listening" one instead]. 😉 s usual, I'm off to those other projects I mentioned shortly ago...

_______

Artwork © me, MysticSparkleWings Winx Club © Rainbow S.p.A.

Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge and associated concepts © My Chemical Romance

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chicinlicin · 1 year

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i keep forgetting to post my responses to wol/oc questions over here OTL so here's a little hoard of elf facts

Compare your height to your wol/oc's!!!

rune is short tall. lumi is tall short . together none of us are tall lol

rune is shorter than elezen min height. lumi is taller than max lala. i'm me sized.

first drawing and most recent!

rune was very briefly a pink witch before going tits out cowboy at an alarmingly speed (shit actually i need to draw more cowboy)

i will always find it funny how fast i also went from drawing like steven universe and cute magical girls to "i will now only draw my scrunkly as shit elf. they are literally the only thing i want to draw" and i've learned so much from that lol

i think it was literally like a month between cute witch and fantasia thoughts fffkfflff (that art is from like june, so here's a more recent one cause i love comparisons :D )

for those with wols/ocs that have names that don't follow their race's naming conventions: why did you choose that name?

rune is an alias they chose to avoid being tracked after leaving sharlayan, only to later find out no one had enough interest in their research to warrant finding them :| but they liked it so it stuck

they do have a proper elezen name but i keep changing it cause i'm indecisive, but also they'd only use rune around most people anyways so it's fine fffff someone says they're good at inscribing runes one time and they make it their whole thing

ooc reason is cause i name all my game characters some variant of rune aren after my first skyrim character so i don't spend 6 hours on the character create screen and i didn't think i'd like playing enough to worry about a lore compliant name OTL

#wolqotd player question — are you younger or older than your WoL and did any thought go into their age?

I had rune around 30, then I mathed a bunch figuring out how long it took jannequinard and leveva to learn astromancy, and serendipity goldsmithing, how old they'd be at the sharlayan exodus, and how long it'd take to become an archon...to end up at 30 again OTL

oh I'm gonna be rune age next year fghffgfffgf

Lumi is 32 and had a similar thing but figuring out how old she'd have to be to have a red mage stone, and training in a bunch of fields. I've been thinking she should be a little older though...

Other than you wol(oc)’s current hair color, what color would they dye it?

rune naturally has greyish brown hair, they get the top bleached, this is an excuse for me to show them with their hair grown out lol

I've tried them with yellow before which worked surprisingly well, they'd try any colour as long as it keeps the two-tone

what does your wol/oc think about archon loaf? are they from sharlayan? was 5.3 the first time they tried it?

rune is sharlyan. unfortunately. they love it. even after leaving they still eat it when they wanna work instead of make real food. eating a proper meal will make them sob with how nice it tastes, then later they're back to eating the stupid loaf again.

their mum grew up near gridania and makes a somewhat nicer version without the fish. it still has most of the uh- qualities of a traditional archon loaf though

#ffxiv #wolqotd #rune #lulumi #drawing #oc #fan oc #text #come get your elf facts lmao #i love talking about my guy i should do it more

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cherrysoulth · 2 years

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In The City - Chapter 1:

The One Who Protects

🏢 Let me take you for a drive. 🏢

💕Pairing: Jimin x Reader

✏️Genre/au: Non-Canon, Action, Smut, Sci-fi, Supernatural world AU

✏️Rating: PG 18+, explicit

📝Wordcount: 3316

⚠️Chapter warnings: tasers, knives, social toxic masculinity consequences

<<<𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝕷𝖎𝖘𝖙 | 𝕸𝖆𝖎𝖓 𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙 | 𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 2 >>>

Jimin steps out of the car with that majestic elegance of his, only his incógnito attire making his cues invisible to the rest of the mortals walking the street at this time of the night. He makes his way to your door and opens it for you, putting his arm around your shoulder, locking his car to walk with you.

The night belongs to you two. In the darkness, you are nobody, very rarely recognized. In the shadows, you can be whoever you want and do whatever you desire to fulfill in your freedom.

The road is always yours and yours alone. The feeling of the wheels brushing over the hard asphalt at a measured high-speed, making up for how the nights are planned. Every place where your feet touch the ground has bodyguards in disguise. At this point, neither Namjoon nor the company are worried about Jimin's safety when you are out because you have it all under control.

This time though, once you walk inside the movie theatre, the security guard who was supposed to pass you the tickets for the movie comes to you calmly, and with a single whisper you know the night is already over. Jimin's hand at your back guides you to turn around, leading you back outside.

You are soon aware that with this one guard, another two quickly follow from a prudential distance, and once Jimin sits in the driver's seat, they run to their car. He was fast to get the engine on and drive out of the lot; much so, that he didn't notice the other car wasn't following.

The phone inside your purse sings its catchy tune, absorbing your attention away from the road and when you check it the screen shows Sewoo-nim's entrance call. With the respective courtesies, you ask him why you can't see them driving behind.

"Our wheels have been ripped. Someone knew we were here." You try to keep calm to not alert the man at your side, who shows enough distress in the way he drives, to be worrying about what might or might not be happening. To your silence the guard keeps talking, "There was a break-in at the old apartment where the receptionist and other employees are staying. No robbery, no damage done, but someone left a note. A very specific one..." he hesitates in revealing the details.

"Skip that, I don't think I wanna know. What else?" You notice Jimin tilting his head to you and you point at the road for him to focus on driving. He obeys.

"It's a death threat, Reyna." For some reason, it doesn't shock you but for how things are going, the situation feels way more worrying than just a simple threat. "You know with how the situation is–"

"I know," you interrupt him.

"We've already called the next checkpoint to find you on the road but there seems to be a traffic issue, so I'll advise you to just keep going until you get to BigHit. We can't have you on the road unprotected now," he explains with urgency. "God, I wish I had hopped in your car, I could make sure you guys are ok."

"Don't worry, I got this," you tell him. Jimin looks in your direction once more and you tilt your head to look at him. "Eyes on the road, please, Jimin-ah." Again he doesn't argue.

"What do you mean?" the guard questions with intrigue.

"You know what I mean. See you later." After the reply, you hang up, unwilling to hear further questions. Without hesitation, you check under your seat to find exactly what you are looking for and take out the bag that is hidden there. You remove a device from its velvety depths and turn it on, hearing the crackling sound of electricity as a blue spark dances in front of you.

"What the fuck is that?" Jimin questions, looking at you for a second then back to the road, about to turn at the next street.

"Don't. We gotta go to BigHit," you tell him and he raises the speed again.

"I've asked you something, Reyna," he points out, eyes on the road as he twists and turns, overtaking the other cars.

"A taser gun. Like you haven't seen them before," you scoff, turning the thing off.

"Yeah, I've seen them. But, why is this thing in my car, under your seat?"

"Jimin. I'm a security guard for the government. What did you think I was wearing, water guns?" you say sarcastically, the tension of the moment and its personal weight paying no favours.

"Don't mock me," he frowns, eyes darting your way for a second then back to the road. The truth is he doesn't want to think about your job, he doesn't like how it's escalated because it means that you can be in danger. So he, by norm, ignores the nature of the deeds you are asked to fulfill.

Being a bodyguard is your job and your passion. When you met, it was already your job but it was in a far less dangerous position. To him, worryings started soon after but he always thought that asking you to stay in less exposing positions was like depriving you from advancing in a career that you excelled at. Nothing has ever happened to you, not even minor injuries and it's not only that which tells him you are good at your job because moving from a company position to the government being a female is definitely a feat. He is just not aware of how well. What he can't imagine is that the company has given you the weapon to protect him.

You are with him on times his guards aren't and it is an advantage they can't dismiss. Once again.

When you were still in close protection training doing your practice time at the BigHit building, you and Jimin started to go on dates in secret and it didn't take long for Namjoon to figure that out. When he confronted Jimin about it, the way he saw his eyes sparkled, although the difficult times made him look the other way; with the one condition of being discreet and letting him know where you were.

The moment you refused Mina's (the Human Resources worker) offer to become a BTS personal bodyguard, despite the obvious friendship between you, Jimin and Namjoon, she found it suspicious.

As soon as she figured out what was going on, she called you to her office. The moment she started asking random questions about your workplace for things that she already had knowledge of and then questions alluding to your feelings in it, you sensed something was off. Then, when she brought up Jimin, all your alarms rang. 'That's it. I'm getting fired.' you thought with tears about to prick in your eyes.

As it turned out, she just wanted to make sure that your relationship wasn't going to interfere with your job performance and that you two would be discreet. Jimin had told you a few hours later how a similar speech had been given to him. However, you received an email two days later for another meeting where things got a little tricky.

She wasn't alone this time; Hitman Bang was there too. They suggested you should take the work that had been offered to you because it was a big opportunity to grow in your career, especially since the group was growing and so increased the responsibility. The moment they expressed a specific interest for you to become Jimin's personal guard, you were speechless.

"Reyna-ssi, I know that's a step further into your personal life, but if you think about it, you're already around him anyway, and being on the BTS security staff will mean you're going to spend more hours a day with Jimin." They were selling it good but you weren't an idiot blind to the possible problems that mixing job and love life could mean. Still, you listened. "We thought it would be profitable for both sides if you'd accept to look after him. With that, and having in mind what I've told you, we've decided, in case you accept, that your formal hours would be the same as the rest of the guards and you'll get paid extra for the rest of the hours you spend with Jimin." As he explained, it took you just a second to realise all what that meant for you.

"The money is not what worries me. The offer sounds reasonable and it does seem like a good opportunity for me. What worries me is how that can affect my personal life and relationship with Jimin. Because one thing is being a bodyguard and the other is being his personal guard, having to punch in every time we are together."

"My apologies, Reyna-ssi, I meant you'll get paid an extra amount having in mind that you'll spend more time with him than the rest of the guards and that he'll be under your protection whilst you meet up. That part you already know and I'm sure that you've already weighed the fact that you're dating an idol. What you do in your private life is nobody's business but yours, but the company needs to know where you two are at least," he concluded.

"That reminds me I haven't formally apologised, Bang PD-nim, for the inconveniences that our road trips might have caused," you said and bowed, aware of the times Jimin had just ignored calls while with you. "But I must certainly–" you then realise that you've already been taking care of Jimin's safety, knowing that your dates could cause a security breach and out of your own concern. "I've made sure Jimin was safe."

"We know," said Mina. "We were sure, knowing your habits, that it was the case. That's what gave us the idea when we knew about the dating."

"Now, if things don't work between you and Jimin," Hitman Bang said, trying to sound as impersonal as possible. "Then you can take back your previous position or we can assign you another job."

"That seems fair," you said, not really wanting to think about that possibility but understanding his point to bring it up.

The problems came when, later that day, you exposed the nature of the meeting to Jimin. Whilst he sounded excited to the prospect of having more time around you if you accepted to be in his team staff, the moment you mentioned your assignment to him, his smile banished. The quietness that followed although he tried to look normal was the calm before the storm in your eyes.

A few days later, after your new position was established and you had been trained on the methods of teamwork besides your individuals, your first job came.

It was pretty simple: accompany Jimin and Taehyung in disguise because they wanted to take a walk through one of the parks to unwind. There you saw the first dark cloud from the upcoming rain, he didn't flicker a lash in your direction. Later, the tension growing on Jimin, showed while he practiced dance routines on the stage. He seemed to lose fluidity as if he had two big sandbags hanging from his shoulders. His eyes kept on swinging to you as you patrolled, two abys of mixed feelings that pinned to you like a hawk, and Hobi had to call the practice off.

"Jimin-ssi, are you ok?" you asked him when he sat down.

"Yeah, I'm fine." he dismissed, as he dried the sweet on his nape. Then you passed him a water bottle and he smiled at you but you weren't buying it.

The way his eyes went lost in the distance soon after, with a stern face, told you something was off and when he abruptly told Namjoon that he was going out for a bit, you had your confirmation.

Namjoon gave you an unnecessary look of warning since you were already after Jimin with two guards, to check on him and Taehyung, who had followed suit to comfort his really tense soulmate. As always one of the guards, the one with a suit, was directly and visibly behind them.

Then you and another one acted as a couple enjoying the leisure, but your eyes were always back and forth on your subjects.Then Jimin sat down and you two had to do some rounds through the park while chatting. This time it was Jimin who kept his eyes on you as you walked, the eye shadow giving him a fierce look on his serious demeanour. When you asked him later on, he blamed it on the tension before the concert and although you knew it was bullshit, you didn't press the matter.

Things didn't go any further from that during the next couple of weeks. Until the tension was too much and you insisted on him to explain what was going on; not buying the excuse of the concerts anymore. You had been together for a year and your relationship had already been through a tour, yet he never acted like that. Finally, the real reason showed up in the socially established, male pride; he felt like he had to be the one to protect you, not the other way around. It ended up in an argument. Like the one that was now boiling up inside the car.

"Now the question is, why do you have that in my car?" he inquires, frowning. You can feel he is not only upset with the situation but with you too at this point.

"To protect you," you say without a second thought.

"I don't want you to protect me, it's not your job," he complains and with your silence he wonders, "Is it?"

"No, it's not my job Jimin," you reply, his stubbornness tickling the wrong nerve.

"Then why is there a fucking weapon in my car?" he questions, pissed.

"Because I wanted to protect you." you reply sternly.

"Okay we're starting to bite our tails here," he comments with a frustrated tone.

"Okay, where's the problem with me protecting you now? We've talked about this, we trust in each other's qualities, so please don't tell me we're back to square one. I don't like square one," you reply concerned.

"We are not. But the problem is that you are supposed to be my girlfriend, not my bodyguard." You roll your eyes because it does seem like the argument you first had.

"I don't want to be your job. It's shitty enough that I can't go anywhere without two guards sticking to my back, to have the only person who I can relax with being part of that too. It makes me feel..." he explains but hesitates in his last words. "It sounds ridiculous...but it makes me feel lonely."

The way he says that with a tired smile makes you want to hug him and not let go but you're still in the car and you do have a job to do.

"Tell me I'm not your job," he says as soon as you see the destination through the windshield.

"Is that what worried you in the beginning?" you ask him, defeated, he gives a slight nod.

"That and you getting hurt. You getting hurt worries me more," he exposes.

"Jimin, I never thought of you as my job. It's something I would have done without getting paid. Getting hurt might be concerning but protecting you, protecting others, is part of what I am. I thought you knew that," you explain, feeling hurt.

"I know...and I know you're careful too. At the same time... It's just. It tormented me for a long time," he explains. "I felt like the company had control over everything in my life and it was something that stuck… I even thought that they had set me up with you," he adds. That's something he's never told you. "You were too good to be true. I even thought you weren't really a guard until I saw you work. You know there's people whose job is to act like they are someone's partner, like some sort of actress or actor."

"I do."

"Well, I– that's what I thought you were," he concludes. "And when I think about it I know I was being paranoid, right? I mean, your skills showed up pretty quickly when we were in America. I actually started admiring you at another level but when it comes to us being together... You having the job to protect me makes me feel like that."

"Rest assured that I protect you because I love and care about you not because I've been asked," you tell him. And he just thanks you and nods, looking at you for a second as he enters the parking lot.

"Wait," he says to you as he parks and you're about to jump out. When you turn around he puts his hand on your chin and slowly moves towards your lips and you feel the warmth of his breath; inviting. Slowly, your lips meet and your right hand entwines with the hair on his nape making him purr slightly as you taste each other. His lips travel to one corner of your lips and down your jaw to your throat. There he smirks when you swallow with a shaky breath and moves away.

"That's what I thought," he chuckles. So low you're not sure you've heard him right. As you get out of the car, the management security receives you and escorts you to another car that drives you to the dorm.

Before you are able to step a foot outside the car, and while Jimin walks out secured by another guard, the management tells you to wait. "Carry this with you everywhere now," he orders, handing you another taser gun and a knife. "I would advise you to convince him to stay in as much as possible, not that you don't know how it works, but this time seems even more serious than before." You take the taser and place it in the inside pocket of your jacket, then put the knife in your boot. "We'll do our jobs with the police from here," he explains before dismissing you and you walk out.

Inside, the apartment is lightened and the members are waiting on the couch. Faces with relief drawn on them as soon as they gaze at you and they approach Jimin to make sure he is unharmed.

"I'm ok. Nothing to worry about," he points out.

"Reyna, you're staying right?" asks Namjoon. "The building is full of guards, you don't really need me, but I'd like to stay, yes."

"Let's go. I'm tired," says Jimin, guiding you by the waist. By how his face looks, compared to how the date started, it's like you've been out for hours and not just the measly one and a half.

Since he doesn't share a room with Hobi anymore, now that Namjoon is married and has his own place two floors down, you've been able to stay more often.

The room is wide, with long windows that have a beautiful view of the city. There's a queen size bed in the middle of the room with grey sheets and a white duvet, that make it look like one big cloud over the dark grey fluffy carpet. The walls are also white withatching polished shelves full of plushies and manga figurines, plus other details he collects. On the wall above the bed there's threads placed in zigzag where he keeps his favourite polaroids and at the bedframe he keeps a silver necklace with an angel that you gifted him two months into the relationship, hanging at the edge, on the side where he sleeps.

As you get inside the room, Jimin pulls you into a hug from behind and kisses your nape.

"This isn't as bad of a date either," he says while his lips land on your throat from the side and pushes you with his body towards the bed.

"Jimin, the members are in the house. Awake." You try to stop the adventure you see coming.

"It is almost like the destiny of the universe. It is just how it is. You know I know. You are me, and I am you~" he sings with a soft voice as he turns you around softly, giving you a peck that transforms into lips playing with need.

You let the song play in your head as you fall over the bed and his lips trace your jawline; fully aware the date has just begun.

🏢 Ready to stay home? 🏢

I hope you enjoyed this first chapter! Let me know your thoughts and reblog if you liked it. 😊 See you!

I want to thank @moonleeai for the beta of this work 💜

#bts au fic #bts angst #secret relationship #jimin x reader #jimin x you #jimin fic #jimin x oc #jimin #Spotify

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thoughtonthoughts · 1 year

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Mexico and my grief

Mexico was a reawakening to life. A relearning on how to reconnect to my surroundings, to the people that cross paths with mine and the subliminal messages that reached me in the most curious ways.

Grieving "invites" your inner world to slow down, but the problem is that the outside world doesn't. This mismatch provokes a feeling of being extremely lost and no longer know how to connect. You want to live but immediately you want to stop and force everyone to stop and join you in your grief.

This was the energy present in this trip.

Mexico carries something hidden...something mystical, a suspenseful energy... Like when someone or something is hiding and lurking, but you can't tell where or who.

One day, we headed to San Juan Chamula in a colectivo. Chamula is a small town, inhabited mainly by indigeneous people named Tzotziles. The Tzotziles carry out their business in the open public market where they sell animals, clothes and houseitems. The women wear long skirts made of black sheep fur. Dead cow's heads hang from the houses door heads.

Once we arrived, we headed to the Templo San Juan Bautista. You have to pay the entrance and follow their rules. You can't take pictures inside nor to the people as the Tzotziles believe that it takes their soul.

Once we crossed the church's semi open door, we were showered with an impressive spectacle. An huge dark room lit by hundreds of candles. The pine needles scattered all over the floor serving as a pillow for Tzotziles families to sit on the floor while doing their prayers and rituals.

The whole church had Catholic statues placed all around with candles burning right in front of each one. Several families arrive either alone or accompanied by a xaman for the limpias. Some bring a chicken alive or an egg and alcohol as a gift. The xaman initiates the ritual and at some point he breaks the chicken's neck. They say that they pass the evil from the people to the chicken and then they kill it and bury it near their houses.

After we left the church, we headed to the local cemetery. As we walked up the street, we passed in front of a house and we heard Mariachis playing and singing in the big backyard. At first, it seemed that it was a Sunday family gathering with a long table, food and whole family sitting and standing around. Short after, we realized it was a funeral and the Mariachis were playing around the grave. We then spotted 2 drunk men crying, singing while holding beers and grieving in front of the grave. Suddenly, the youngest man spotted us and made a sign inviting us to come in. We hesitated, but he continued to call us and waving the beers at us. Uncomfortably we entered, greeted and walked by the whole family that was staring at us and we approached the grave. The young guy was very intoxicated and crying a lot. He offered us beers, opening them with his teeth. Then he proceeded to say that it was his dad in the grave and he died from something related to the lungs.

It hit me close to home, as I had just lost my Dad 3 months prior, to lung cancer.

He said that his father loved Mariachis and for that reason he hired them to play in the funeral. He continued to stumble while talking and crying at the same time. The whole family and some of the Mariachis continued to stare at us. Politely, we managed to leave him with his grief.

Was undoubtedly one of the most surreal, sprinkled with a bit of serendipity and syncronicity, experiences i have ever had in my life.

#dealing with grief #grief #mexico #surreal #dad #death #grieving #griefjourney

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mggpleasedontlookhere · 4 years

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call out my name pt. 2

summary: spencer rushes off to fix things with y/n, but can they really be fixed?

word count: 2,371 reading time aprox: 9 mins

a/n: i just wanted to say thank you for all the support and praise i received on here, especially seeing all of my favorite authors comment and reblog my work is so heartening. thank you all so much for the support, you’re the reason why i have the encouragement to continue doing what i love <3

masterlist

part 1

The rain pattered against the window panes, interlocking with the light that shone through the sheer curtains of my apartment. A cold breeze slipped through the crack of the window, letting it venture through the dim room before it graced my skin. Although the sensation hadn’t registered in my mind as the plain beige wall in front of me consumed my attention.

The hypnotic sound of the rain provided a consistent rhythm that encouraged my introspection. In the entire duration of my break, I’ve let my thoughts filter and organize themselves. I’ve felt powerless against the accusations that my brain has thrown towards me, setting my emotions to the side in a state of suspense.

My knees were curled up against my chest, my unwashed hair scrunched up against my cheeks, and my sweater was littered with unknown stains and dried tears. Along with the descension of my reasonability, my hygiene followed shortly after.

I was brought out of my bubble by the buzz of my phone. I turned it off weeks ago from the constant notifications I got from the team, it was only when I received a text message from my mother that I decided to turn it back on for the day.

I reached over to the side table where my phone laid, feeling my muscles tense up and ache from the lack of movement I’ve done these past weeks. Turning it on, the intense light blinded me, leaving me disoriented. When my eyes finally adjusted to the sudden change of light, I wished that I had been blinded a little longer than I was.

The notification read ‘New Voicemail: JJ <3’

My breath got pushed back in my throat, a wave of discomfort flooding over my entire body as my thumb hesitated over the notification. My lips trembled, swallowing my saliva while a debate ensued between my impulsivity and my timidity. With a numb boost of confidence I hurriedly pressed on the notification, traveling through my phone to hear out her message.

“Hey Y/N” The message began. “I know that you heard...about what I said to Spence-” Her voice was low and full of penance, although any remorse that I tried to comprehend washed away at her use of Spencer’s nickname. “Gosh, I don’t even - I don’t even know how to begin to apologize for what I said - I - you don’t know how much Spence loves you and how much he talks about you” She sighed, her tone picking up as she praised Spencer. “But what I said was completely inappropriate and I’m so sorry for what I said. Telling Spence that I loved him was way out of line, considering that you’re such a dear friend to me, and especially since things are so complicated with me and Will - I just - I’m so sorry that I told him that I love-”

The rest of the message was left to the imagination as I forcefully threw my phone against the beige wall, denting it in the process. A flurry of newfound rage clouded my mind, providing a break from the contradicting thoughts that usually engulfed my head. For once, I had directed the emotion towards another individual rather than myself.

The phone fell with a heavy thud, glass debris flying across the floor, decorating the oak floors with fragments. I could care less about the material expense that I would have to pay; my blind resentment tainting my rationality.

My chest heaved in exasperation as a novel onslaught of tears pricked the corners of my eyes. Although the quantity of tears were sparse because they were wasted on my self reproach the previous week. I furiously wiped them away, detaching myself from the malicious feeling, a habit I came to develop.

I adapted to the stupefaction that infiltrated my heart, at times feeling grateful for the ability. The coldness that surrounded my small living room couldn’t compare to the icy innards of my chest.

Finally collecting my composure, I looked over to a mirror that sat between my bookshelves, taking in my disheveled and ragged appearance.

JJ wouldn’t look like this

My face contorted into a somber expression, letting my insecurities slip through the hard persona I persisted to instill in myself. I surveyed the filthy environment that surrounded me; the floor was painted with old dirt, the furniture had accumulated colonies of dust, and the roses that sat on the kitchen counters had wilted.

JJ would never let herself go like this

Who was I kidding? Who was I, Y/N Y/L/N, to compare to a Georgetown graduate, an astounding profiler, and an icon of beauty?

Well the one thing I had that she didn’t was Spencer

But did I really?

I was startled out of my grim assessment by a frantic knocking against my front door. I groaned internally, not hesitating to stay where I was situated. I couldn’t handle any human interaction at the moment, frankly I didn’t want any human interaction at all. I’ve learned to love the little cocoon I had built around me, finding serendipity in my self-isolation.

“Go away!” I attempted to shout, but all that came out was a hoarse whimper that sent a sharp pain to my esophagus. I flinched as the knocking became more frantic, the volume elevating along with the forceful jabs against the wood.

I felt my ears ring, using my hands to alleviate the pounding that attacked my eardrums. I was about to open my mouth to disclose another warning, but a familiar voice had interrupted me.

“Y/N! Y/N are you in there!” Spencer yelled, slamming his fists against the door between every phrase.

I froze in my spot, a wave of mixed emotions coming over me as my cheeks flushed at hearing his voice for the first time in a long time. The familiar sound sent shockwaves down my spine and dread silenced my tongue. It felt like I was on high alert, like an animal paranoid of its prey.

“Y/N! Just - god please tell me you’re at least okay” He stammered in his fit of hysteria, the bangs on the door slowing in rhythm.

Silence followed his pleas, instilling a sense of relief that I didn’t know I needed. Movement outside stilled, making me think that he had given up his relentless efforts and went elsewhere. I let out a breath that I held in, alleviating the stress that had accumulated inside of me.

Although the moment that I began to relax into my seat, two blaring shots rattled through the apartment complex. The scent of gunpowder meshed with the dewy air as I jumped out of my seat, startled and alarmed. I closed my eyes and covered my ears with my palms, the ringing leaving me blindsided.

“Y/N! Y/N? Are you there?” Spencer rushed in with his gun pointed, his feet clattering against the floor in a haste.

“What the fuck Spencer” I hoarsely whispered, although the meekly volume of my voice hadn’t penetrated this ears.

“Y/N!” He called out once again, slowing his movements as his sneakers squeaked with every step he made.

“I’m here Spencer, I’m here” I repeated, using all my might to push the small phrase off of my tongue. My throat stung at the strain of my voice, a burning feeling eliciting from the back of my throat due to the dryness. This time I had caught his attention.

We locked eyes for a brief moment before I quickly broke our line of sight, insecure about my current appearance; even after a month I still held Spencer’s opinion to the highest magnitude. In the time that I observed him, I noticed that he was drenched in rain water, his hair tangled and strung out from his head while droplets proceeded behind him.

“I-” He breathed, his words caught in his throat. He dropped his revolver beside him in incredulity, drinking in my battered presence. He didn’t look too well either, his stature was still the same but the bags under his eyes were prominent, his cheeks were puffed from exhaustion, and his posture resembled the hunchback of Notre Dame.

“W- what are y- you doing here Spencer?” I croaked, rubbing my hands against my arms in an attempt for any type of coverage.

My senses heightened as I waited for his response. He brought in such a familiar, yet unfamiliar presence with him. It felt like I was home, but so far away from it at the same time.

Maybe it was the way that I longed for the warmth of his embrace, the calming rhythm of his heart beat while I slept on his chest, and the soothing melody of his voice while he read to me. But maybe it was also the way he hadn’t dared to speak when JJ’s voice was full of love, when he assumed that I hadn’t acknowledged the endearments he received from another woman, and when I became a distant thought in the back of his head.

I’ve never doubted Spencer’s eidetic memory, but this time I questioned my place in that brilliant mind of his. Maybe for the first time, I was the one thought that had ceased to exist.

“I - why didn’t you tell me?” He uttered, running his hand over his jaw in grievance. His eyes burned holes into me, the intense glare making me feel small under his scrutiny.

I couldn’t answer

“God Y/N - I don’t even - why didn’t you even tell me?”

“I - uh - I don’t” I stuttered, unable to muster the confidence or cognitive ability to speak; it was like my brain had turned into mush.

“Please talk to me” He pleaded, taking a hesitant step closer to me.

I stumbled back in a haste like he was some sort of repellent. I felt a constant push and pull in my gut, messing with my innate instincts.

“Spencer don’t-” I warned, seeing how he had taken a few determined strides towards me.

“Spence...please don't - p- please” I whimpered, feeling a wet substance slide down the apple of my cheeks. I tasted the crimson blood mix with the salty residue on my lips, unaware of how hard I bit down on the skin.

Pained tears continued to fall incessantly from my eyes, matching the way the rain ran down my window panes previously. I saw Spencer’s figure slump down in defeat, the helplessness in my words permeating his eardrums.

“Y/N just - please let me fix - Y/N just please let me fix us” He solicited, looking to me for permission to advance.

“Spencer there’s no need for fixing anythi-”

“Yes there is Y/N-”

“No there isn’t Spencer!” I persisted, convincing myself that I had everything under control. I shut my eyes in frustration, shaking my head in denial while I reminded myself of all the malicious emotions I refused to feel.

“Y/N please just list-”

“No Spencer. I know what to do and I know how to deal with-”

“No Y/N! No you don’t - god you’re so stubborn sometimes -” He imprudently blurted out, pinching at the bridge of his nose to collect his composure. “Y/N - please just…” He sighed, looking deep into my eyes from a distance. “Please just let me in” He begged, a few tears slipping from the corners of his somber irises. His face wore an anguished and desperate expression, an expression that had the ability to end a war.

My cold exterior shattered instantaneously from the sight of Spencer, feeling my heart being tugged into multiple directions until all that was left was a pained human muscle. As much as I wanted to convince myself of an ardent persona, I knew that Spencer was the only person that could invoke such a visceral reaction from me. Whether I accepted the feeling or not, I knew that Spencer’s effect on me was unmatched to any delusions I made myself to believe.

My lips trembled uncontrollably as a soft sob rolled off my tongue. I looked to Spencer for aid, feeling my entire facade crash and burn. My knees buckled and weakened from reality coming in all at once. When the first cry fell from my mouth, more followed soon after.

I became a drenched mess that sat in the middle of the living room. I felt deceived by myself, developing a sense of self resentment as my mindset came into actualization. I grieved for the fragment of myself that I secluded and killed off because of my inability to process my agony, longing for that piece of me back.

Spencer came to my rescue, engulfing me in his arms and encroaching me with his touch. I leaned into his chest, desperately clutching onto the dress shirt he wore. My tears stained his blazer, leaving puddles along the fabric, but I couldn’t care less.

I breathed in the sedative scent, feeling it flush through my nostrils, reminding me of home. I held onto his arms tightly, afraid that he would disappear the moment I let go of him.

Spencer tried to reach down to grab a hold of my cheek, but I nudged his fingers away, climbing into his lap as I buried my face into the crook of his neck.

He cooed into my hair, stroking my back while he whispered his endearments in my ear. “You’re okay Y/N - we’re going to be okay” He breathed, letting out a staggered exhale as he enunciated his words.

Light rushed into my chest at that moment, letting it conquer and cut through the caution tape I had wired around my feelings. Shutting my eyes, I relaxed into his love, letting it infiltrate and replace my fears.

I didn’t doubt that it was going to take time to heal and repair, but at least it was beginning.

“I love you so so much Y/N - more than you can ever conceive” He declared, pressing a soft kiss on my temple. “And nobody will ever tell me otherwise”

I knew from that moment that I didn’t have to walk on a tightrope no longer because I knew it was my name that Spencer would be calling out.

taglist: @rexorangecouny @howdycharlie @linthebinbag @goldentournesol @andiebeaword @moon-light-jukebox @pizzarollsfordayz @baby-i-am-fireproof @cielo1984 @spncersreid @101donuts @l0ve-0f-my-life @haylaansmi @parkeroffline

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the-ethereal-aura · 3 years

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Souls 250+ Celebration

Hi so umm this happened a few days ago

For some reason 257 people have decided to follow me *loud squeal* ahhhhhhhhhhhh i dont know what to say i love u guys-

I havent done a celebration before this so i have no clue what to do i was planning on doing a 150 one but then that became 200 quickly and thats around when i took the mini hiatus and it became this-

Im rambling sorry

So i am gonna do something but mostly after diwali cause ill be going out so i wont get much time next week but i promise i will so pls bear with me love u guys byeeee

so gonna tag some darlings here ill tag u guys again for the actual celebration post

@dark-artifices-only @lightwood-di-angelo-hargreeves@hardlymatters@@haline-of-troy@darkshadowqueensrule @mudivilli-thodavanum @the-blackdale@they-ca-llme-princess@lost-in-the-noise @queen-born-out-of-fire@kitandtyarelife@serendipity-memories@stay-because-now-you-have-a-home @asterismm@thelastfunctioningbraincell@jianming @gorgeous-herondale @carstairrs @bi-saster-and-chaos @athenapotter @sanibond @log-kya-kahenge@i-think-i-can-speak-here@sassychaostrash @jo-thesmolbiqueen @imapparentlycoolandfriendly

#ok ive tagged a lot of ppl #sorry if u got tagged twice #and tell me if u dont wanna be tagged #or if u do #souls 250+ celebration

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sequinsmile-x · 3 years

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Serendipity

This was originally a prompt on here that I promised a follow up to, but got carried away.

The original prompt is in italics, so you can refresh yourselves on what it was!

Words: 3.6k

Rating: Mature

Read over on ao3, or below the cut.

Let me know what you think!

It should never have happened. Emily hadn’t intended for it to, and she knew Aaron hadn’t either. They hadn’t meant to fuck at JJ’s wedding, hidden in Dave’s guest bathroom as Aaron’s girlfriend danced with his son downstairs.

Things shifted between them that night. The dance they had shared, his hand in hers and his breath against her neck had ignited her skin, set something on fire that she had tried to ignore. Emily had tried to walk away, to put some distance between them. Aaron had followed her, knocking softly on the bathroom door when she had been in there a little too long.

Emily wasn’t entirely sure who kissed who first, but she remembered him pressing her up against the counter. How it felt when he pushed her dress over her hips, her own hands not idle as she undid his shirt, wanting to feel his skin against hers.

The aftermath had been awkward, but that hadn’t stopped it from happening again the following day. Him coming to hers for the coffee they had promised each other, ending up on the couch instead, clothes shed and desperate hands palming against each other's skin.

She stiffened when he said he had broken up with Beth, the gentle hope in his voice breaking her heart. Emily still remembered the look on his face when she said she was still going to London, his cheek against her hand.

She had been in London for two months before she called him, lied and said she was in town for a consult. Aaron obviously didn’t believe her, but he came to her hotel room anyway. Emily realises she should have known it would be inevitable, that they would have sex again. She wants him as much as he wants her and she has spent so much of her life denying herself the things she wanted. It isn’t lost on her that this is the first time they have done this in a bed, and she sits up as he gets dressed, the silence in the room deafening. She pulls on one of the robes hung up in the wardrobe, pulling the tie tight around her waist.

“Aaron, we still need to talk.”

He looks at her, his face stern. “Are you staying?”

Emily opens her mouth, unsure how to even begin to answer that question, to say what she needs to say. Aaron takes her hesitance as an answer, shrugging on his jacket as he shakes his head at her.

“I should go.”

“Aaron, please.”

“Give me one reason why I shouldn’t leave.” He says, his voice full of defeat and she hates that she's the one that put it there. That she caused the man who she cares for more than she should to feel anything other than happiness. Aaron turns to leave, his hand on the door of her hotel room and a heavy sigh escapes him. “See you next time you’re in town, Emily.”

Emily closes her eyes and wraps her arms around herself, pulling the robe she had put on tighter, as if it could hold her together in the soft material whilst she tells him what she came here to say. What she couldn’t bring herself to tell him on the phone.

“I’m pregnant.”

Aaron turns to look at her. Her eyes are fixed on the floor, her arms crossed tightly across her chest.

“Emily.”

She looks up at him, a small smile on her face. “I think it goes without saying it's yours.” She clears her throat awkwardly when he just stares at her, clearly trying to figure out what to say next. “We should sit down.”

She moves over to one of the armchairs in the corner of the room. She curls up into the chair, pulling her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around them. Emily feels relief ease some of the tension in her chest when he joins her, sitting in the chair next to hers.

“Are you ok?” He asks, and it makes her smile. Any frustration he had aimed at her had melted away, replaced by confusion and something she couldn’t quite place.

“I’m ok.” She answers. “Although morning sickness is the most poorly named thing on the fucking planet.” He laughs at that, and it’s nervous, making her raise an eyebrow at him. “Are you ok?”

He nods. “I think we have a lot of things to discuss.”

“Yeah.” She replies, swallowing against the lump in her throat. “We do.” ____________

The flight back to London is rough. Her constant nausea makes the hours drag by, her desperation to just be on solid ground almost overwhelming her.

She’s never been more grateful to see her apartment, the place still not quite feeling like home yet. She sinks into her couch and groans when her cell phone immediately rings, rolling her eyes when she sees Clyde’s name on the screen before she answers.

“Do you track me or something? I’ve only just made it back.”

“That's for me to know and you to wonder about, darling.” Clyde says, smugness in his voice that made her smile despite herself. “How did our dear Agent Hotchner take the news that he’s going to be a father again.”

“Quite well given the circumstances.” Emily answers, unwilling to divulge anymore of her conversation with Aaron to her friend, knowing if there was one person on the planet he wouldn’t want her to talk to about this it would be Clyde Easter.

“You’re going to go back aren’t you?”

Emily laughs, frustrated that he could read her so well even over the phone. “I don’t really have a choice, do I?”

“You always have a choice.”

“Not now.” She replies. She looks down at her abdomen, still flat with no indication of the life growing underneath her skin showing yet. “I can’t keep the baby from him, or him from the baby. He’s a great dad.”

“You left DC for a reason.”

Emily places her hand on her belly and smiles to herself. “And now I guess I have a reason to go back.” ____________

Aaron visits her a month later. His insistence on coming to London for a long weekend made her laugh. She feels nervous when she picks him up at the airport, but it fades away when she sees him.

It’s strange, having him there in her apartment, like two very distinct worlds were colliding. She liked it though, couldn’t help but smile as he walked around and made himself familiar with where she lived.

“I had a scan this morning.” She says, smiling at him nervously when he turns to look at her, his hands in the pockets of his jeans. “Would you like to see the picture?”

“Of course.”

She beams at him as she digs the scan photo out of her purse and hands it to him. “Everything looks good, even if I am a ‘geriatric mother.’’ She said, using air quotes as she spoke.

Aaron has the gall to laugh at her, which makes her raise her eyebrows at him. He steps towards her, ultrasound scan still in hand, and he hugs her. She hugs him back, breathes in the scent of his cologne. She pulls back enough to look at him, and before she can think better of it she leans forward and kisses him. It crosses the delicate line they hadn’t crossed since he had left her hotel room a month ago, still reeling from the life changing news he had told him. They’d been in contact every day since, exchanging texts and phone calls around both of their gruelling work schedules. They’d been acting like friends, nothing more, but her hands grasping the back of his head, pulling him closer to her, changed that.

“Wait.” He says against her lips, pulling away so he could look at her. “Is this a good idea?”

Emily heaves in a breath and licks her lips before looking at his. “Maybe not.” She presses another quick kiss to his lips. “But it’s not like you can knock me up again.”

He stares at her for a second before pulling her back into him, kissing her fiercely as she drags him to her bedroom. ____________

They don’t talk about anything important until the day he leaves, neither of them wanting to ruin the little bubble they had created in her apartment. It’s him that tentatively brings up her plans over the breakfast they had ordered in.

“When are you coming back?”

“In three months.” She says as she takes a sip of her tea. “That’s when my replacement can start here, and when the role at the DC Interpol office opens up.”

Aaron frowns at her. “The DC Interpol office?”

Emily nods. “It’s essentially what I’m doing now.” She senses his confusion and clears her throat as she sets her mug back down. “I was never going to be coming back to the bureau, Aaron.”

“It’s your choice, I just thought you would have mentioned it.”

Emily can feel her temper flaring, annoyance rising up in her before she can stop it. “We’re not in a relationship, Aaron. Just because we fucked a few times and accidentally made a baby doesn’t mean I have to run everything past you.”

He stares at her, a hard look on his face. It seems to take him a moment to speak, and the way he carefully chooses his words pisses her off even more. “Would you even be coming back if it wasn’t for the baby, Emily?”

She looks at him, her fury written all over her face. “No. I wouldn’t be.”

He leaves pretty quickly, claiming he needs to get to the airport even though his flight isn’t for another 12 hours.

____________

After that they speak less often. She updates him on the baby and he asks her how she is, how both of them are doing.

When she starts to show she takes a photo of her bump and sends it to him. The next day a package from Amazon arrives full of pregnancy skin care, a gift note from Aaron that tells her Haley had sworn by the bump cream. The tenderness of the gesture makes her cry, the affection she feels for him almost bursting out of her chest.

She calls him when she finds out they are having a boy, her enthusiasm seeping down the phone and filling his voice with wonder.

As she boards the plane to DC 3 months after she last saw him, all of her belongings shipped, she feels something a little bit like hope bloom in her chest. ____________

Aaron comes to visit her at her apartment almost as soon as she gets back, a smile on his face and a bag of takeout in his hand.

“Hi.” She says, almost shyly as she lets him in.

“Hi.” He kisses her cheek before he thinks about it, pulling her into a hug. He steps back and looks down at her abdomen. “Wow.”

Emily laughs, her hand landing on her belly. “Yeah, he’s getting big.” She takes the bag of food from him. “We should eat.”

They eat and make conversation, and it’s as if 3 months of awkward conversation between them hadn’t happened. He asks her about Sergio, and she says Penelope would be keeping him for now, but that she had full visitation rights.

Aaron clears up the plates, and she rolls her eyes at him as he tells her to put her feet up. She feels the awkwardness seep back in when he sits on the couch next to her, the unanswered questions hanging in the air.

“I’ll get you your own key.” Emily says, tearing her eyes from her lap to look at him. “It makes sense for you to just be able to come over, see the baby whenever.”

He nods, an awkward smile on his face. “I’ll get you one to my place too. Jack keeps asking when you’re coming over.”

“That’s sweet. I missed him.”

“He missed you. We both did.” It’s awkward again for a moment, and she can see the second he decides to simply say whatever he had been holding back for months. “What are we, Emily?”

She sighs. “I don’t know, Aaron.” She grabs his hand and squeezes it. “I care about you. So much. But if we hadn’t had sex at JJ’s wedding we wouldn’t even be here right now. How is that the foundation of a relationship?”

“By itself it might not be, but we have a lot more than that.” He cups her cheek. “We’ve known each other for years. I know I’m not the only one who has felt that there could be more between us.”

Emily closes her eyes and rests her forehead against his. “There is so much more at stake now.” She puts their joint hands on her bump. “We can’t mess anything up for him, or Jack.”

“Don’t we owe it to them, to us, to try?”

She pulls back enough for her nose to brush against his. Emily decides that she’s going to let herself have what she wants. She nods before she kisses him, sighing as they both lean further into it. She breaks off with a laugh when she feels the baby kick against their hands.

Aaron looks down at her stomach in wonder. “He’s kicking?”

She nods at him. “He’s kicking.”

For the first time since the test came back positive she genuinely feels like everything might work out. ____________

By the time she's 8 months pregnant she is spending the vast majority of her time at his apartment, even when he was away on a case, and she tries to ignore what that means. That she’s 2 months into a relationship with a man and practically living with him and his son. Whilst being pregnant with his second son.

Her mother had always told her that she didn’t do anything by half.

Emily is sitting on a park bench, watching Jack play on the swings, with her hand pressed into her belly when she feels it. The familiar feeling of being watched. She feels a shiver run down her spine, goosebumps raising over her body.

Her first instinct is that it’s Ian. All of her logical thoughts that he was dead, that she’d watched him die, being beaten by the anxiety coursing through her. Every reason she had left DC in the first place comes flooding back and she has to take several deep breaths. The feeling doesn’t go away, she looks around the park quickly. She can’t see him, can’t see anyone that looks like they’d be associated with him, but she feels like she needs to leave. Like she needs to get Jack, and her baby, back home as quickly as possible.

She’s about to walk over to Jack, make him leave his friends so she could take him home, when she hears a familiar voice.

“Emily?” She whips round to see Beth standing next to her, an awkward look on her face as she takes in Emily’s appearance. “I saw you from across the park, I thought it was you.”

“Beth. Hi.” She tries to smile. “How have you been?”

“Good.” She nods. She looks at her again, eyes landing on Emily’s bump. The unspoken understanding from the other woman that she was pregnant with Aaron’s child. “You look well.”

Emily’s smile falters. The last time she had seen Beth had been at JJ’s wedding, the night she’d had sex with Aaron when his girfriend was just downstairs. Beth would know that. Emily knew that Aaron was a good enough man to have told her everything when he broke up with her.

“I am really sorry, Beth. For how everything happened.”

Beth laughs and sits on the bench next to her. “That is almost exactly word for word what Aaron said when we got back to his place after JJ and Will’s wedding.” Beth looks over to where Jack is playing and smiles. “I knew something had happened, neither of you were very subtle.”

Emily feels her baby roll in her belly and she presses her hand to it, hoping the gentle circles soothe her son as well as herself.

“I...I guess saying we didn’t mean for it to happen won’t mean much.”

“It doesn’t.” Beth says, a wry smile on her face as she turns back to Emily. “But are you both happy?”

Emily doesn’t even have to think about it. “Yeah. We are.”

“Then maybe it was all worth it.” Beth says as she stands. “I should get going, tell Jack and Aaron I said hi.”

“You should say hi to Jack.”

“It’s ok. I don’t want to confuse him.” Beth smiles at Emily one last time. “Tell Aaron I’m glad he’s happy.” ____________

Aaron gets back to his apartment, the case he had been on two days too long for his liking, to find Emily fast asleep on the couch, wearing one of his shirts and a pair of leggings, with her hand pressed into her stomach. He smiles as he hangs up his keys and sets the alarm, setting his briefcase down on the side. He walks over to the couch and sits on the edge of it, gently waking her. She opens her eyes and looks at him.

“You’re home.” She murmurs, the roughness to her voice giving away that she’s been asleep for a while.

He hums in his throat as he strokes his hand over her head. “Why are you on the couch, you know it doesn’t do your back any good.”

“I was waiting up for you.” She sits up slowly, accepting his help to get her upright. Emily leans against his side as he sits next to her, smiling when he puts one of his palms on her belly and kisses the top of her head. “I missed you.”

“Missed you too.” He tilts her head and kisses her properly, feeling her smile against his lips as the baby rolls in her stomach. “How are you?”

“Good.” Emily answers. “My entire body is sore. But good.”

He hums his sympathy and rubs his hand over her stomach, the baby forever active in a way he knew had caused Emily to lose sleep.

“I’d like to take you on a date.” He says, smiling as Emily pulls back from him, a look of curiosity on her face. “I realised today that I've never taken you on one.”

“Aaron.” She replies, a smile on her face. “I’m 8 months pregnant with your son, I think we’re a little past dating.”

“True, but you have only just agreed to be my girlfriend.” He laughs when she scrunches her nose at him, leaning down to kiss the tip of it. “What?”

“The word ‘girlfriend’ makes it sound like I’m 14, not in my 40s.”

Aaron smiles at her again and kisses her, smiling against her lips. “Well, I’d propose to you so you could call me your fiancée, but I worry that would send you running back to London.”

Emily laughs, kissing him again quickly. “I wouldn’t run away, but I might check if you were feeling ok.” She rests her head against him again. “I saw Beth today.”

He stiffens, his arms tightening around her. “How was that?”

“Awkward.” She answers, turning her head to kiss his shoulder through his shirt. “But she was very nice. Nicer than I might have been in her shoes.”

“I’m glad.” He kisses the top of her head. “What else?”

“What do you mean?”

“What else happened?”

She scoffs. “Can’t keep anything from you.” She sighs. “I could tell someone was watching me, and before Beth came over I thought it was Ian.” He doesn’t say anything, and it spurs her on. “I know he’s dead, that I don’t have to be afraid anymore, but I was for so long.” She feels her emotions rise in her chest, tears flooding at her eyes as she was at the mercy of her hormones. “And I have so much more to lose now.” She wipes her face. “You, Jack. The baby.”

He kisses the top of her head again, then her temple, holding her impossibly tighter. “You aren’t going to lose any of us, sweetheart.” He tilts her chin so he can kiss her properly. “This is it now. Forever.”

She ignores the voice in her head that tells her he can’t promise her that, and she nods.

“If that’s a proposal I’m leaving.” She jokes and it makes him laugh, his forehead pressed against hers.

“Trust me, baby. You’ll know when I’m proposing.” ____________

He takes her on a date the following week. She lets him take her to a restaurant and spoil her, and he doesn’t make any comments when she orders enough food for at least 3 people for herself.

He takes her for ice cream after, going into the store and getting it himself so she doesn’t have to get back out the car, her ankles sore and swollen.

That night they lay in his bed, the one she really knows is theirs, and as he runs his fingers up and down her bare spine she drifts off to sleep.

“I love you.” She whispers into the room, the first time she has said it to him.

She stays awake long enough to hear him say it back. ____________

It should never have happened, but when their son, Benjamin, is born three weeks later Emily is so glad it did.

#hotchniss #hotchniss fan fic #hotchniss fanfiction #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #aaron hotchner x emily prentiss #aaron hotchner fanfiction #emily prentiss fanfiction #Season 8AU #fluff #angst #family #accidental pregnancy #this has it all folks

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mminttae · 3 years

Text

Blanket Of Lavender Scent

-> Pairing : Jimin x Reader

-> Genre : fluff fluff!, fluffy Jiminie, extra clingy Jimin cause he missed you a lot, Jimin wants cuddles, lavender and vanilla scented tees are perfect for eachother

-> Summary : After two weeks of attending meetings in a business trip Jimin is finally home and craves for your attention but you want to simply watch a movie..

-> Word count : 2.334K

-> A/N here's a Jimin one shot for y'all to enjoy until I actually finish writing the first chap of Jimin's series. Gif not mine, credit to owner.

Song recs ( to make your reading time more fun) - Serendipity\Serendipity instrumental - Jimin

Around 7pm

You sit on the large sofa and look outside the window, the chilly weather outside making the window glass a bit blurry. Judging on how the weather is getting colder day by day you thought it wouldn’t even take one full day for the snowflakes to start decorating the window panes. An uncomfortable silence took over the apartment. Only the clock ticking could be heard. You kept glancing from the clock to the entrance door thinking if time slowed down. Diverting your gaze towards your phone you think perhaps his flight has been delayed or maybe he’s stuck in traffic. He did say that he would visit you first after stepping out from the airport. Did that bastard lie to me? there are possibilities of him lying to you based on how he loves seeing you get angry and all pouty, well yes you are indeed angry now. Just when you were about to call him the doorbell rang making you quickly get up from your seat and run towards the door.

“What took you so long?!!-- “ You slightly shout as soon as you open the door but become silent when you notice there’s no one in the doorway. you step out a bit and look to the corridor on your right but there was no one. You were about to turn around to check your left when two big arms wrapped around your waist, back hugging you. Your breath hitched but later relaxed when the familiar lavender cologne hit your nose. Your favourite scent of all time. Resting his chin on your shoulder he whispers in your ear, “missed me?” You brought your hand towards his and started fiddling with the silver promise ring he was wearing. You had the same one too. “no,” you whispered back to him making him give a small sweet laugh followed with a peck on your cheek. “Says the person who kept texting me to come back quickly.” He said while tightening the hug, your cheeks now warm with a soft rosy blush. OH hell YESS you missed him! But maybe he missed you more. Or maybe both of you missed eachother equally. You break free from his arms and turn around to look at him now for real not through video calls. His blonde soft fluffy bangs covering his forehead, his eyes turning to crescent moons as soon as the corner of his lips turned up. “Jimin..” you take hold of his hand,(more like a sweater paw holding another sweater paw A/N : thaT’S sO cUtE uWu ok um back to the story AhEM) “lets go inside” you pull him inside your comfy apartment and close the door.

“Why does two weeks feel like two months” Jimin chuckles while saying , leaning on the back of the couch seeing your busy back as you take hold of a mug and pour in the peach juice which you made. (Jimin loveeeeesss the peach drinks you makes , he loves you too ;) ) Handing him the mug you speak, “maybe cause we never went without seeing each other over five days.” Taking a sip from his favourite drink he replies “four days was the highest.” “It could have been if you didn’t ditch me for your video game,” you rolled your eyes making your way to the couch, Jimin following you with a pout and murmuring ‘it wasn’t my fault that I forgot, Jungkook and Taehyung practically went on their knees to make me play with them” your lips break into a small smile but quickly went to poker face, you missed his whining and ofcourse that smoll pout. You looked on your side to see Jimin waddling like a duckling towards you before sitting down on the couch and pulling you on his lap, hugging you by your waist and nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck, inhaling your vanilla scent.

“why are you late?” you ask, playing with his soft hair. “I lost my suitcase.”

“stop joking”

“I’m not” .

You look down at his face, a bit innocence can be seen in his eyes. You scoff in disbelief bringing your hands to yourself from his shoulder.

Okay he’s not joking .

You get up from his lap and sit a bit far from him (not too far though). “Y/N....?” Jimin shakes you by your shoulder but you don’t response . “Is my Y/N-ie angwy?” Jimin asks in a cute way in hopes of melting your anger away. He knew damn well that your anger doesn’t stand a chance against his cuteness. There was a moment of silence. Jimin kept poking your arm and kept calling your name but seeing no response he started slightly slapping your arm while giving his own background music and THAT’S when you snapped. “Are you- are you a kid?!!? HOW CAN YOU LOOSE A SUITCASE AGAIN YOU FU---” you stop when your eyes meet his puppy eyes. I shouldn’t have raised my voice dangit. Jimin’s lips curled to a pout and he stared at you like a baby about to burst into tears. You were having human glitch, you cleared your throat and sat down normally infront of him instead of standing on the couch. “Bu-but I found it again after asking the customer service system for help..” he said with a pout while fiddling with his fingers. You knew well that the stuttering was an act afterall you’ve been together for more than a year now. Your anger over Jimin loosing his suitcase would sound dramatic to many people but your anger ofcourse had reasons. This might be the 20th time he lost his suitcase ( the only difference today is that he found it again). Everytime he looses he buys MORE THAN EXPENSIVE ones and and like his suitcase contains his clothes??? files and documents too??? Does he have the Namjoon disease now?

You heave out a sigh once seeing him still sitting with a pout and stealing glances at you. You move towards him and lean in to leave a small kiss on his pouty lips. You pull away and found jimin following your lips, he definitely wants more. You chuckle and pat his head “be careful with your things from next time kay?” Jimin is like a lost friendly puppy but when it came to work he would become a wolf seconds. If anyone hears about his clumsiness they would start doubting if he’s really the CEO of the 2nd most popular and big company in the country. He snaked his hand around your waist pulling you closer, using his other free hand to tug a loose strang of your hair behind your ear then he proceeded with caressing your cheek with his thumb. “I promise I’ll be careful from next time, love” he whispered as his eyes travelled down to your lips. He slowly started leaning in BUT BUT you felt like TEASING him :) You pushed away his hand and got up from sitting making your boyfriend frown and... unhappy... “Why the pizza ain’t here yet?” you question yourself seeing the clock it was about time for your pizza order to arrive. Jimin ofcourse didn’t give a damn about pizza. He just wanted you, close to him. He tried holding your hand and pulling you towards him but your quick sensing ability made you walk away saying that you better start taking out plates for the meal, loud enough for your now grumpy and pouty boyfriend to hear. He stands up mumbling some rubbish under his breath, scoffs towards you before walking towards your room to grab a blanket knowing that you would want to watch a movie while having dinner. Jimin obviously has different plans. CUDDLESS!!

Time Skip ~

Lights off, all cuddled up sitting infront of the tv screen. You both wrapped around a blanket, Jimin’s arms wrapped around, his chin resting on your shoulder, his toe grazing yours. Although you both were stuck like glue to eachother Jimin wasn’t that happy. The pout on his face didn’t really get noticed by you as you were too focus on the movie playing infront of you. Out of excitement of spending time with you after a long time he forgot your love for the marvel series and clicked on the play button. Sigh. “Y/N..” Jimin trails off nuzzling to you. you hum as a response to which he sighed ( might be the 30th sigh since the movie started) “ baby look at me..” he says giving you a peck under your ear. “What is it?” you ask in a voice that speaks ‘ I’m not that interested in what you’re about to say.’ “You acted like you were about to take a plane and come to me when I was away but now you’re not even giving slight look to me” he whines removing the blanket away and sitting up straight but your face still fixated on the tv screen. “ I doubt you even missed me hmph “ his chest went up and down as he folded his arms and looked away from you, guess he shouldn’t have done that cause the second he looked away you looked at him. You couldn’t help but stiffle a smile at the sight of his puffed cheeks. You tried unfolding his arms but instead he swatted your hand away. “ Ofcourse baby i missed you” you cooed to him to which he replied with “you’re a bad girlfriend.” You just laughed before going “oh my godd the war started!” and focusing back to the tv. Jimin scoffed in disbelief once seeing you. He never once hated a tv this much. He once again leaned on your shoulder ( angry or not he can’t stay away from you). Muttering a no to himself he moved away from you and leaned on the couch hand. Even though his whole being was itching to feel your warmth his ego kept him away. But your lips forming a smile didn’t go unnoticed by him.

25 minutes before the ending of the movie

You stretched your arms and looked at your now sleeping fluff ball boyfriend beside you. He must be tired from the journey. He is tired but still wanted to spend time with you. A sudden hint of guilt hit you as you got reminded of his whining to turn your attention on him. You leaned towards him and gently brushed his bangs away AND--- OH HE’S NOT SLEEPING. You blink a couple of times staring at his face when you realize he’s trying to not smile. Jimin you sly fox. You were about tell him to stop acting when a sudden idea popped up in your head making you smirk to yourself. You move back from him and fake a yawn, pretending sleepy you say to yourself knowing he’s hearing, ”what to do I was planning on giving Jiminie hugs and kisses but he is already sleeping” you spare a glance at him and saw him frowning. You stood up before saying “ I should go to bed as well,” before you could take a step forward his hand pulled you back making you fall on top of him, your hands on his chest supporting you from not falling flat on his face as his arms snaked around your waist hugging you. “You are not going anywhere,” he whispered scanning your features. Your heart beat picked up its speed due to the very small distance between both of you. You have experienced ‘no gap between eachother’ before a lot of times but still to this day you never got to get used to the tension. “I thought you were sleeping..” you say while brushing his soft hair locks away from his eyes. Without saying much Jimin just used his hand to push your head forward as he leaned in as well , connecting both of your lips. This wasn’t just a small kiss or peck , this time it was an actual kiss he wanted to share with you since his arrival here. You craved for it too but didn’t show. Jimin sat up straight before making you comfortably sit on his lap. He broke the kiss for a couple of seconds to whisper “I missed you..” you whispered back “ I missed you too” before joining lips again. Both of your lips fitted eachother perfectly, like puzzle pieces. Your surrounding seemed to have gotten more sweeter due to the lavender smell on Jimin. He smelled like lavender and honey and you loved it. Both of you were enjoying the moment when.....YOU HAD TO GET INTERRUPTED :)) Your phone screen lighted up with the name ‘mom’ on the display as the ringtone took over the comfortable silence making you two break away from eachother. You sigh as Jimin groaned. You were about to reach for the phone when jimin stopped you, he hugged you tightly and said “let’s just continue” with pleading eyes. “Let me just receive the call..”

“no no no you are finally giving your attention to me I don’t want you to look away” he whined shaking his head.

“If I don’t receive--

“I HATE phones, moms and televisions they keep stealing my Y/N away from me” he pouts, you laugh seeing him get so clingy.

“Why don’t they understand ?!!! Y/N IS MINE!!” he shouts out of frustration and the phone goes to silence at once indicating the call ended. He didn’t get himself for shouting suddenly but he just wanted you to only look at him. “You didn’t had to get worked up babe,” you chuckle to which he reply “your mom is thinking you’re asleep if not then tell her tomorrow you were sleeping.” he say giving a sheepish smile “now where were we?” he asked before attacking you with kisses making you laugh from ticklish feeling. “Ji-Jimin stop it tickles!” the apartment soon gets filled with both yours and Jimin’s laughter and giggles.

“If you try waking up before me tomorrow I’m going to make sure you don’t get to shower tomorrow” he says playing with your promise ring. “what kind of threat is that?” you ask not getting him. He just simply replied with

“I love you”

“love you too... Jimin”

#BTS jimin #jimin fluff #fluff #jimin loves cuddles #jimin fic #oneshot #bts imagines #jimin imagine #i finally finished writing this #jimin x reader

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writerofshit · 3 years

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(I mentioned briefly a story of how the Stream Team met. This is that story.)

Somewhere in Los Santos, in the late night hours of a Tuesday, a convenience store is robbed. So is one several blocks southeast. And one roughly in the middle of them both. After all, what's more convenient than 24 hour chili dogs on every other street corner?

Cash. Cash is more convenient. So are guns. Hollering, waving one to get the other. Most important, back alleys that twist and turn, snaking away from increasingly distant sirens. Three individuals find themselves running through these alleys, a couple grand each weighing their pockets down.

It's through serendipity and convenience that their paths cross.

The man from the farthest store arrives first. He's done this a few more times than he'd like to admit, so he'd had a plan. Of sorts. Cut through the park, take a few sidewalks like an upstanding citizen, under the bridge and find a fire escape to utilize from there. There aren't any that reach the ground, of course, because he's smart but not quite enough.

And so this is why Trevor is standing in an dark alley, contemplating whether or not the dumpster will give him enough height to reach the ladder, when the man from the middle store appears. He's around Trevor's height, but would probably win in a fight between them, if he were so inclined. He doesn't seem to be, though. He seems shaken, like he's not quite sure how he ended up in this alley. He's holding a gun almost gingerly, as if it might bite him.

Trevor pulls his own gun.

'dont you fuckin' try anything!'

This does not go over well with Matt. He takes a step back, and then seems to remember that he also has a gun so maybe this is even footing. He holds it aloft, finger nowhere near the trigger.

'same, asshole!'

At this moment the robber from the first store arrives, also, of course, with a gun. And a mask. And an entire purple and orange neon fucking suit, actually, topped with a white cowboy hat. It gives them a few extra inches of height they are distinctly lacking, comparatively. Somewhere in the back of his head, Trevor acknowledges that this newcomer could probably kick his and the other gunman's asses. It is not a pleasant thought.

'oh, what the fuck!?'

Jeremy sounds more annoyed and less scared than one would think, considering they've run into an alley only to find two men with guns. Two men who quickly turn those guns on them.

'who the fuck are you?'

The question surprises them all, including Matt, even though he's the one who asked. As it turns out, people have a tendency to say the first thing that comes to mind when in a stressful situation. Such as, having robbed a convenience store for the very first time and immediately finding himself face to face with other apparent robbers. It would get to anyone, probably.

'i don't want any trouble, but i've already robbed someone tonight and i don't give a shit about felony murder!'

Two lies and a truth, is what Trevor has chosen to play, for some reason. In reality, one does not rob a convenience store at gun point if one is intent on staying out of trouble. And he does, in fact, care very deeply about felony murder. Felony murder is the precise reason he'd shot a bag of Doritos and not a clerk. In his defense, the clerk had initially rolled her eyes at him, asked what exactly he thought he'd get out of this. He'd found this question rude.

The truth, of course, is that he did rob a convenience store. That did happen. No take backs.

'so did i!'

Matt and Jeremy speak so in unison it's almost scary. If they didn't know any better, they'd think the two of them had always known each other.

Trevor's gun wavers between them, unsure which is the bigger threat. The guy who clearly has zero experience with guns, or the weirdo who seems to have far too much? It's a toss up, really. So his aim pinballs back and forth, but his finger does not curl around the trigger. He's serious about that felony murder thing.

The air seems to shift, suddenly, and the sound of sirens is now growing closer. This evidently also annoys Jeremy, and they throw a glance over their shoulder to the direction they'd come from. Red and blue lights flicker past.

'shit. ok. we're all robbers, i guess, and we're all fucked if we keep standing here. who's got a plan?'

Jeremy's eyes are staring impatiently at Trevor. Eyes being the only part of their face Trevor can see. And their hands, a plastic bag in one and a gun in the other.

Trigger finger is an apt name.

He glances at Matt, still wild eyed and glancing back and forth. No, Matt probably does not have a plan. He sort of gives the impression that he's never had a plan ever, actually. That perhaps he'd simply woken up here and decided to wing it. So Trevor makes an offer.

'fire escape?'

There's another moment of tense silence. Well, minus the sirens. And oh, helicopters. Even better. Jeremy shrugs.

'good a plan as any.'

And then they're off, brushing past Trevor and hoisting themself up onto the dumpster. He knew it could work. Trevor blinks and Jeremy has caught the ladder, is quickly working their way up. Shit, how does five foot something manage to get that high on a good day, much less in this situation and with a bag and gun in hand?

Matt's gun clatters to the ground, and honestly, that's probably for the best. He's climbing onto the dumpster now, and he mutters something about not signing up for this shit. Trevor reminds him that he apparently robbed someone, so yeah, he kind of did.

Before Trevor climbs up, he shoves his gun into his jacket pocket. Smart? Probably not. Convenient? More so than climbing with a gun in his hand. He follows Matt up the ladder, wondering what happened to his plan. Yeah, the ladder had been involved. Two other people, however, were not.

Above them, glass shatters.

'warning, maybe!?'

'oops. careful, there's glass.'

Jeremy's voice is no longer directly above them. Instead, it comes from one story up and a little to the left. So they've broken into an apartment. Sure, add breaking and entering to the list of charges, that sounds great. But Matt and Trevor follow, because there's not really another option.

Inside the apartment, Jeremy's mask is gone. The suit is quickly disappearing as well, revealing a rather boring outfit of a white tank top and...sweatpants? The true mystery lies in where the cowboy hat has gone to, because that's a hard item to miss.

'do we really have time for this? don't you think someone might, oh, i don't know, wake up and call the cops?'

Trevor doesn't mean to hiss, it's just that he's sure there's more pressing matters to attend to than an outfit change. Continuing to flee, perhaps.

'nobody's gonna wake up.'

They don't even have the wherewithal to lower their voice. It registers to Trevor that Jeremy's bag and gun are missing as well. Had they dropped them on the way up? It was certainly possible. Trevor thinks he would have noticed a gun flying past his head, but there's a lot going on.

'can we maybe not kill anyone? he brought up a good point with that felony murder thing.'

It's the most words Matt has strung together since he'd shown up. It's damn near a whisper, but at least it's progress.

'i'm not- god, can you two shut up? i gotta make a phone call.'

Jeremy yanks the door open, hand carefully wrapped in the fabric of their shirt. For a moment, Trevor thinks they're leaving and steps forward to follow Jeremy. Instead, Jeremy turns and heads toward the kitchen, pulling open a drawer and digging inside it briefly. They come back with a cell phone.

Something dawns on Trevor.

'is this- do you live here? did you break your own window?'

Jeremy doesn't answer. They put the phone to their ear.

'you're gonna wanna hide whatever you've got. and try not to look like you just climbed in through a window.'

And then-

'hello? yes, hi, i'd like to report a break in, i think? i was hearing a bunch of sirens and then i don't know what happened but some guy just broke my window? he ran through and i just- my friends and i are really scared and we didn't know what to do- yes, we're ok, he's gone, but we- you'll send someone? ok, thank you. the address? oh, uh, it's the del perro heights building, apartment 7. should i shut the door? no, don't touch anything. ok- guys, don't touch anything, she said someone's on their way to check on us! thank you so much- no, i think we'll be fine. thank you.'

It's a marvelous performance. Jeremy genuinely sounds like some poor flustered victim of a crime. Trevor would applaud if he thought Jeremy would appreciate it. Almost immediately, their voice is back to normal.

'check things out my ass. they're gonna show up, ask which way he went and never call me again. feel real fuckin safe.'

Jeremy settles themself onto the couch, choosing the spot closest to the door. Matt, who has apparently gotten over his initial terror, wanders into the kitchen. Searching for something to distract himself, if Trevor had to guess. Trevor is still standing in the middle of the living room, dumbfounded. How did a simple robbery become hanging out with other robbers, waiting for cops to show up?

'i'm jeremy, by the way. they won't ask, but y'know. just in case.'

They're flipping channels on the tv, seeming to arbitrarily skip almost a dozen programs. Finally, they settle on one and stand. Trevor recognizes it as an old Disney movie, and desperately wants to ask why the fuck Jeremy has put this on.

'uh, hi. i'm trevor. why are we watching Mulan?'

'matt. oh hell yeah, i love this movie!'

He sounds remarkably cheerful, considering the circumstances. How Trevor had seemingly switched places with Anxious McGee is beyond him. He needs to get it together. He pulls his gun from his pocket and takes it to the kitchen, sticking it in the drawer Jeremy had taken the phone from. There are several other phones of varying price point. He steps back to the living room just in time.

'that's why.'

They don't elaborate. Apparently Trevor is meant to just figure this out on his own, which ordinarily he might be able to do. After the course of events of this particular evening? Not a chance.

But he can't ask, because now there's a cop in the doorway and he's staring at Trevor and that will never be a good thing. Trevor stares back. He has no clue what he's meant to say. Hello? Welcome? He went that way?

'oh thank god! we've been so terrified, we didn't know if he'd come back or what he'd do.'

Naturally, Jeremy has taken lead on this. They're a phenomenal actor, Trevor has to admit.

'did you see which direction he went?'

'toward the stairs, i think. we've all been rooted to the spot, you know, it's so scary-'

Matt freezes in the doorway of the kitchen. He's just out of the view from the front door.

'right, well. you boys did the right thing by calling. can you give me a description of the man?'

The corner of Jeremy's mouth quirks.

'gosh, it all just happened so fast. taller than me, probably, but shorter than you, wouldn't you say, trey?'

Trevor nods, because he's not quite sure what else to do.

'alright, thank you. someone will be in touch with you for an official statement. in the meantime, if you remember anything else don't hesitate to call.'

He's holding a card out to Trevor, of all people. He takes it carefully, like if he does it wrong somehow the guy will know and arrest them all. The card is simply the number for a tip line.

As suddenly as he'd arrived, the cop is gone and they're all breathing sighs of relief. Jeremy closes the door.

'you guys can stay for Mulan, if you want.'

So they do.

Trevor asks about why Mulan again, and Jeremy explains that they assume most people have seen it, could answer any questions about it if they came up. Perhaps, if LSPD officers were less incompetent, they would have. Although if that were the case, they wouldn't be LSPD officers at all.

Matt asks about the window, and Jeremy says yes, they did break their own window. Of course they'd had an actual plan when they'd entered the alley. They were always going to end up exactly here, give or take the extras. Asking for a plan was simply a test, determining the merit in bring them along. They'd passed.

Jeremy asks if they want to stay for Mulan II, which is apparently up next. They do.

Somewhere in Los Santos, in the early morning hours of a Wednesday, three convenience stores are recovering from three separate robberies. Right in the middle of them all, their respective robbers are sitting on a couch together, watching a straight to video children's film.

It is the beginning of something far greater than any of them can imagine.

#is this dumb? maybe. did i have way too much fun writing it? absolutely.#is this how any of this would go irl? god no. is it still fun? hell yeah.#fahc #fake ah crew #ks writes

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mybg3notebook · 3 years

Text

Does Gale love Mystra?

So far in EA, we have been shown that this is complicated to answer: human love is complex as well as the delirious lore of Forgotten Realms.

Disclaimer Game Version: All these analyses were written up to the game version v4.1.104.3536 (Early access). As long as new content is added, and as long as I have free time for that, I will try to keep updating this information. Written in June 2021.

The number between brackets [] represents the topic-block related to (this post), which gathers as much evidence as I could get.

The narrative is clear until the party scene which, as I stated many times across these posts, it's a scene that feels a bit inconsistent for me (reasonable since it's EA). But if we follow what the game explicitly shows us, we know that if we send Gale to sleep at the beginning of the Weave scene in which he is watching the incantation with the shape of Mystra, he will say:

Gale: Long days, yes. And long, lonesome nights.

If Tav knows that the incantation on his palm is Mystra, Gale will explain:

Tav: [insight] You don't have that look on your face when you're looking at “no one” / There's more to it than that. The figure I saw: she means something to you. Gale: [...] I can’t quite describe it, the need I sometimes feel to see her – to draw the filaments of fantasy into existence. [...]

Dev's notes: Passionate. [...] He was recalling Mystra as a lover, but doesn’t say that out loud. [...] Narrator: The Weave evaporates, and as it does so, you realise the night feels suddenly cold and lonesome.

This allows us to infer that, at this moment, Gale is feeling alone and probably very anxious with the oppressing feeling of the "orb" in his chest. The tadpole only increased the number of problems he has, so he resorts to seeing Mystra melancholically. We notice later in the Weave Scene that not having Mystra around increases this feeling of loneliness. The whole scene seems to give us the idea that he still loves her. There is yearning and loneliness in his current situation.

After a moment of passionate description of magic, Gale invites Tav to experience the Weave. The Weave has a particular effect on Gale: "The moment feels intimate. You realise the Weave is making you one." Considering how Gale was feeling while conjuring the incantation, this moment touched him deeply (the narrator implies that this feeling is mutual).

If Tav expresses their romantic interests, Gale will be surprised:

Gale: I.. I didn’t think.. Narrator: You perceive quick-fire gusts of embarrassment, trepidation, and finally.. elation Gale: Sorry, I wasn’t expecting… But it is a pleasant image to be sure! Most pleasant, in fact. Most welcome. Dev's notes: Warm, with real affection.

The narrator is giving us meta-knowledge, we can trust in what she says, and we can see that the situation was truly shocking for Gale. These emotional stages described here made me suspect that Gale is a character who has focused for too long on healing his condition, ignoring any chance for romance. His surprise here may confirm that, in my opinion. He feels embarrassment, a feeling that one can interpret as a sign of the surprise of being thrown into a situation he had not seen beforehand (the death protocol and Gale’s conversations show us that he is a character that thinks ahead). It follows trepidation: fear or anxiety about something that he is going to do or experience. Gale is scared of the possibility. Maybe because he is thinking in the danger he is, maybe because he was already burnt by Mystra's attention and having someone else's attention now makes him feel a bit anxious. And then, the final resolution of the process: elation, which is a feeling of great happiness and excitement about something that has happened. Gale is suddenly excited by the possibility. Something he will be thinking about, many times, for the rest of the EA.

Tav: So what did you think about what I pictured when we were connected by the Weave? Gale: Oh, I was surprised. But pleasantly so, just like I said. Amid the madness that has befallen us, it seems almost out of place to think of a kiss/ of a romantic walk. And yet... now more than ever, it's important to recall what makes us human. [if Tav is not human] Well- you know what I mean. A stolen glance- that sudden heartbeat... Sometimes the little things are worth more than kingdoms. They promise things to come.

So romance was not something he had even considered until the opportunity arose (this is why he won't pursue a Tav who didn't show romantic interest towards him). I think that, since he is a character always living on the edge of death, he will take this opportunity to feel “human again”: after all, he follows the concept of "living life to the fullest".

During the Loss (see the post of the "Loss Scene"), we know that losing Mystra was a big blow for him. He regrets his decisions of the past in this scene, and it reinforced the idea that he is the only one to blame for Mystra's loss. There is a yearning for the lost Chosen powers, but Gale's context in the majority of his scenes seem to reinforce the idea that he sought power not as a means, but as a goal itself to be closer to Mystra and Magic. Since we are talking about a wizard, his passion lies in magic itself, in being one with the Weave/Magic/Mystra. A Chosen of Mystra is so entangled with the Weave and magic that when they die, they are part of the Weave itself. This is the level of passion that Gale has for Magic, and since Magic can only be performed by most mortals via Weave, and the Weave is Mystra, the whole three concepts are, in fact, one; and it makes it very difficult from a lore point of view to separate them.

Tav: There's something I don't understand. If Mystra abandoned you, how can you still cast magic? Gale: The Weave is still here, all around us – inside of us too. As long as the goddess lives, magic is a tangible thing for those who know how to touch. I've studied magic for many years, and in as many ways I am still a more than capable wizard. It's just that I'm no longer able to perform those feats even arch wizards would marvel at. To have one hand on the pulse of divinity. You have to remember that the Weave is a living thing, both the embodiment and the extension of Mystra herself.She can give and she can take away. I'm afraid I'm still very much on her naughty list. Consider yourself lucky you're not.

I personally think Gale will never stop being devoted to Mystra (and won't stop loving her in many ways), because his passion for magic and knowledge is his own life, and Mystra IS those things. He loves magic for the sake of it. So losing this unique contact with magic itself that only Chosen of Mystra have was a terrible punishment for him. His abandonment issues are not just the result of a “guy being left by a girl”. They have an extra complexity because of the nature of Magic in this world and how its deity behaves with her chosen. Gale was not only abandoned by Mystra, but was also removed of a good amount of his capacity to perform magic. If magic “is his life”, the abandonment removed a part of his life away. I think some people miss this point, because, once more, it's related to Forgotten Realm lore and not Dragon Age. Many of these people keep constantly comparing this situation with Dragon Age, which has nothing to do with it. Dragon Age has no wizards, their relationship with Magic is natural, it’s sorcerer-like if we want to compare it, and the relationship with their deities (mostly absent, silent ones) are nothing alike the ones in Forgotten Realm. The context is key, as I repeated several times in these posts and in the one about "Context, persuasion, and manipulation".

Tav: I don't know what to make of what you've told me, but I sympathise. Gale: Thank you. [no romantic weave] I want you to know that you’re a good friend. [romantic weave] I often think of that moment we shared together – one under the Weave. I hope you think about it too. /I'm glad to know you think about it too.

Narrator: You sense a moment of unspoken affection. You want to know where it may lead. Gale: I consider myself very lucky to have found you Tav: I think perhaps we could be more than friends Gale: Perhaps.

Tav: You said you think about the moment we shared under the weave. Do you think about it often? Gale: Do you? 1-2-Tav: Yes / From time to time. Gale: So do I. 3- Tav: Not really. Gale: And yet you ask. I do, as a matter of fact.

Gale: You see. I'm not a big believer in fate, but I do believe in serendipity. Life is a tempest of events that sometimes we brace against and sometimes embrace. You're one such event that one day soon perhaps I'd like to embrace.

So after sharing this regret during the Loss scene, Gale will show affection if Tav remains friendly during the Weave (but Gale will never directly engage it, he is waiting for Tav to give the first step; understandable if we consider he also has a dangerous bomb in his chest, so he may be torn between wanting to, but knowing he should not to). If there is no interest in pursuing romance, he will show a gesture of gratitude for being a good friend during that night of regrets.

If pursuing the romance, we can interpret that Gale, at this point, even though he is still struggling with all the emotions that Mystra inspires, wants to experience something more “human”, a romance with a mortal. We know for sure that Gale is getting interested, slowly, while thinking about it, since in each of the following scenes he will ask (or Tav will ask) about that “moment in the Weave”. He has been thinking about it for many nights, and he is “embracing” the idea.

If Gale is treated with judgement (despite not knowing his whole story) or allowing him to keep the secret of what or who he lost, we will obtain lines likes:

Gale: Good. Goodnight. And thank you for your patient understanding. // And try not to think too poorly of me. A cat can look at a king. A wizard can look at a goddess.

Tav: Another fool pays for his arrogance. A tale as old as time. Gale: Arrogance? Ambition, rather. And ambition is a fine thing – until suddenly it no longer is. Then again, if that is how you judge me, there’s little I can do to change your mind. But know that I have this ambition still. First to save myself, and after that, the licence to dream. (Gale Disapproval)

We could interpret these lines as the only ones so far that may suggest that Gale is still wanting something from the goddess. We know due to the tadpole dreams that Gale’s desire is Mystra. On the comments of the second tadpole dream we know more details about his major desire: it is not just Mystra, but her forgiveness.

Tav: Gale, who is the apparition in your dreams? Gale: She's... It doesn't matter. I just know her to be unreal. Tav: What's impossible about what you're been shown? Gale: Forgiveness Tav: Gale, who is the apparition in your dreams? Gale: It's indeed Mystra I see. And yet it cannot be her. There was a time when I would have believed - but no longer. I told you that I lost her. Lost her favour and lost so many of the powers I took for granted. What magic I can still weave is met only with undercurrents of disappointing silence. Mystra has not changed her mind about me. That's how I know our dreams are delusions.

I think this scene shows the difference between a standard desire for power as a means, and power for the sake of power itself (since this power allows Gale to be one with the Weave). The scene is ambiguous enough to see it as Gale wanting to return to Mystra’s side as well as remaining as an ardent devotee of her (because she is magic herself). I keep repeating that these scenes show that Gale’s most important thing in his life is Magic, which is Mystra: the extension and the embodiment of magic. So his desire for her seems impossible to be extinguished completely. In previous scenes we saw that he certainly had thought through the idea of loving her more like a devotee than a lover, but certainly the weight of being his first love will remain, especially since she is deeply related to magic itself.

During the Party Scene we find some information about his feelings for Mystra.

I personally ponder the book of Amn’s description as very important because, from a narrative point of view, it's a lot of lines/content that, if they were not important, tend to be removed from the script. If they are there, they are meant to be interpreted. For this reason those lines mean to me that Gale has finally embraced the idea of having something important with a mortal. In my post of the "Party Scene" I go into details, but here I will stick to the interpretation related to Mystra: all what Gale numerates in that book are things that he could not access to with a Goddess. Curiously, part of those descriptions are things that make humans human, so I personally think it reinforces Gale's intention in heading into this romance with the eagerness of finding some shelter (never forget the “orb” has a constant oppressing effect in him, increasing his anxiety and fears) and to experience (maybe for the first time) the love of a mortal.

So, for some assumptions made in the post of the "Party Scene", we suspect that Gale needs to share a night to feel confident enough to speak the details of his “orb” condition. Since he wants this relationship to be strong (after all, he implied commitment during the description of the book) he speaks about the true origin of the “orb” immediately after that night, starting with Mystra (which is, after all, the true origin of his folly). Depending on the version that Tav picks, we have extra information provided by Gale about his emotions for the Goddess:

Tav: What did Mystra’s attention feel like? Gale: Love. Perhaps it was not quite love, but you see, the wizard was but a very young man. It was most certainly love to him. [...] One day all too soon, the whispers stopped. The goddess spurned the mortal. [...] and the wizard was left behind heartbroken. Tav: I hate to say it, but he really could have seen this coming Gale: He was blinded by love. Good stories are rife with lovers’ follies after all.

[Short Version] Gale: Before long Mystra tired of me. What was I after all but a mortal plaything in sacred hands? You have to realise I was heartbroken. I was a young man, she was my first love. I thought it would last forever. I vowed to win her back.

[after explaining the mistake of the “orb”] Gale: It is this folly that led Mystra to abandon me completely. I can only hope you won’t abandon me as well. After all we’ve been through.. After the night we spent together. Surely we can brave even this side by side

Gale is giving a very detailed context about his love for Mystra: she was his first love, and the first love tends to have a special weight in a person's life and their memories. That doesn't mean the person has become unable to build more relationships for the rest of their life. If we add the fact that he was very young when all this happened (more details in the Post "Gale Hypotheses- Part 1") we find him under two effects: the impression of the first love and the naivety of the youth. Both elements made him believe it was a love that was going to last forever. With a Goddess, no less.

Besides, Gale expresses this, highlighting his naivety and foolishness: he is aware of how silly he was back then, and how impossible it could be for a mortal to keep the love of a goddess. He is a pragmatic and realistic character, after all. He recognizes in the end that he was just a mortal plaything for her.

I think these pieces of information give us a very clear context of his emotional state: he is still nostalgic for Mystra because of all the reasons I enumerated above; she is also more than just a woman, she is Magic itself. But he is aware that those emotions were the consequence of a very naïve and young self that has awakened by the burden of his own mistakes. There is also a reinforcement of “forever”, which recalls the concept of commitment that Gale pursues so much in his romance: he is not there just for the sex “intimacy”, he is there for serious commitment, maybe because he doesn't want to experience another abandonment. After all, we are talking about a character with a profile that shows abandonment issues (see the post of "Gale Hypotheses- Part 1", section: "Abandonment Issues")

[If rejected] Tav: No. This is too large a betrayal. GALE: I see. I am sorry. I am sorry that it had to come to this. All that’s left to say is farewell. Dev’s notes: hurt but understanding Gale: Farewell. (Leaves) Dev’s notes: A slight hesitation, hurt but understanding. He makes a polite little bow, then we see him walk away.

[If accepted] Gale: I don’t know what I did to deserve the magic that you do.

Despite being terribly cheesy, this last line shows that Gale was more than convinced that Tav would abandon him because he doesn’t deserve Tav. This is why he doesn't put up much fight if Tav chooses to tell him to leave. He will try to make Tav listen to his story, and once it's done, the verdict will fall and he will accept it. He learnt his lesson with Mystra. This line also shows how everything important around Gale is or has to be worded with magic, even a silly metaphor like this is related with the word “magic”: Tav's acceptance is like magic. For him, as important and good as magic itself.

As if that were not enough, after the scene there is a comment in which Gale will reinforce his gratitude for Tav's acceptance:

Tav: If you ever feel the netherese magic overtaking you, what will you do? Gale: If it should ever come to that... if I ever know I am no longer able to stop it... I will do anything I can to ensure no one but me pays for my mistakes. I will find the remotest place on the surface of Faerûn, or perhaps far below in the depths of the Underdark. I will await that death alone. [*] I promise I will not betray your trust... You kept me by your side despite the menace that I am. If worst comes to worst, I will be gone long before the curtain falls. [*] If romanced, Gale will say here "I cherish you."

Which makes me suspect that Gale can disappear at any moment (in full game) if for some game mechanics we are unable to get magical artefacts but the deal with Raphael did not happen (if that’s even possible). But that's just me speculating. Nothing in EA seems to suggest this. What i's clear is that acceptance—that strong concept in the book he put so much emphasis on—is really important to him, so he shows gratitude for that: he promises to protect Tav (and many innocents) from his own mistake. He also says pretty soon an equivalent of “I love you”, in a more formal/meaningful way: “to cherish” is not just to love, but to care/protect as well.

Finally, in case someone lost those hints, or maybe as a consequence of this unpolished scene, we have a direct question with a direct answer:

Tav: Gale, are you still in love with Mystra? Gale: I’ll be honest with you; I don’t know. She is my muse still, the embodiment of magic, but the embodiment of love? Only if we ever meet again will I know

Gale simply says what we have been inferring so far with all the previous information: Gale reinforces the idea that he will remain as a strong, loving devotee of Mystra, because she is magic. I personally don't even consider it possible to remove that love from him. He may not be a cleric, but he loves his deity as one. But he also learnt his lesson that loving gods has its own dire consequences for mortals. He is very aware of it during the discussion about Karsus:

Tav: Nothing good ever comes from mortals wanting to be gods.

Gale: Loving them has its side effects as well. Now, so many centuries later, I tried to follow in the footsteps of Karsus, not to destroy Mystra, but to prove my love for her. It tried to control only a fraction of the magic that was unleashed that fateful day. I merely sought to return one tiny diamond to an imperfect crown. Gale's Folly one might call it. History. Repetition. It's the way things go.

Once more, there is no scene where Gale doesn't reinforce that what he did was a mistake, a foolish action, a Folly.

Finally, if talking about a previous lover immediately after awakening with a new one was of poor taste, Gale acknowledges this, giving an honest apology:

Gale: Before we go on though, do first let me apologise. To share such a night with you only to tell you of a previous lover the next morning... It wasn't the most gentleman-like behaviour. But I had to finally tell you. Silence would have been far worse behaviour still. Nevertheless, I am sorry.

He accepts any rude response or lash-out from Tav without approval penalties. This is an interesting meta-knowledge that speaks about owning up to his mistakes. Unlike the Loss scene, where rude responses made Gale disapprove because Tav was judging him without knowing the whole story [16], in this scene he doesn’t. Now Tav has the whole picture, and he accepts whatever reaction Tav shows. Of course he will approve a forgiving Tav, since Gale is a character very related to forgiveness [12, 12b].

Conclusion:

So, answering the question that gives title to this section: yes. In my opinion, Gale loves Mystra. But it’s not a white-and-black love; it has the complexity of human love mixed with this crazy lore of deities in Forgotten Realms. I believe Mystra will always be part of Gale's life, because the Weave and magic are his life, and she is both. He will always love her as a devotee, even though he now understands the mistakes of his young self and seems more aware of how naive he was when he was a “very young man”. The comments on the second tadpole dreams explicitly show that what Gale wants the most is Mystra’s forgiveness, but at the same time, he knows that he does not deserve it. And this raw realistic view of himself is what makes him understand that those dreams are illusions. During the party scene he is uncertain about his emotions, but still he emphasises that there is a big chance for him to not see Mystra as the embodiment of love any more but reinforces that she will always be the embodiment of magic to him (a very important concept in his character design).

Whether Gale is romanced or not, I don't see a difference in the information he shares on this matter in EA.

This post was written in June 2021. → For more Gale: Analysis Series Index

#bg3 meta #gale #gale of waterdeep #bg3 gale

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satanfemme · 3 years

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Freaky Movie Fall!

happy halloween! for you, beloved followers, I’ve compiled a list of 31 days worth of movies to watch this autumn! (<- would've been for the month of October if I weren't already 13 days late, but what can u do lol) these aren’t all horror movies, but a mixture of: horror, fucked-up, and/or simply the vibes of the season.

quick disclaimer: altho I recommend all of the movies listed here, I also highly recommend checking a synopsis or doesthedogdie.com before watching anything you're unfamiliar with, as this list sometimes jumps between family friendly films vs. actually disturbing films. but for your convenience, I’ll also be making note of each title's MPAA rating, and I'll be starring the title with an asterisk (*) if any version of the movie includes a sexual assault scene.

(also if the organization of this post only makes sense to me, so be it hdfghf)

Part One: by god it's fall

1. The Plague Dogs (1982), PG-13 - an animated talking dog adventure that's maybe a bit more for adults than children, this movie features tragic (and sometimes outright gruesome) content without it ever feeling forced or out of place for the weird yet moving story being told. never has a movie made me care about cartoon dogs more than this one.

2. Ginger Snaps* (2000), unrated but around PG-13 imo :shrug: - a coming of age supernatural horror(-comedy?) where a werewolf curse serves as a metaphor for puberty. this movie really hits the nail on the head for what it's like to be a Weird Teen, while also discussing some really interesting themes surrounding codependence / leaving unhealthy childhood habits behind.

3. The Blair Witch Project (1999), R - I'm not usually big on found footage shaky cam horror like this, so I put this movie off for such a long time, but boy am I glad I finally gave it a shot. not only did the blair witch kick off the genre, but it more than perfected it imo. the arguments between the characters can be a bit grating and long, but if you don't mind watching a family vacation simulation for a few hours, the built up is worth it.

4. The VVitch (2015), R - although this horror doesn't have the most memorable plot imo, the atmosphere and setting are both notably great. yeah that's about all I've got to say about this one. there's some cool goats in it too? give it a shot!

5. Re-Animator* (1986), R - what if an unhinged medical student discovered how to bring the dead back to life? what if he were gay enough that the tumblr lgbts love him for his crimes (for.. some reason?) yeah, this movie's not my fav but regardless it's still a classic good time 80s sci-fi horror movie, and the gore effects are campy as hell. literally what else could you possible be looking for from this list? this is a movie to watch with popcorn and friends.

6. Pink Flamingos* (1997), NC-17 - ok lets get into it! this postmodern exploitation comedy film (yes I had to google that) is the wildest mix of fun(?) lighthearted humor plus... literal-shit-eating and foot fetish sex scenes (not at the same time). total autumn vibes and what I'd describe as "baltimore core" aesthetics (if you grew up there, you'd know), but definitely not for any fainthearted viewers. for what this movie lacks in horror, it makes up for with everything else it has going on. personally, my fav part is when a block party kills and cannibalizes a group of cops. divine plays the main character, who's also named divine. I've run out of things to say about this that isn't just a content warning list. if any of u ever call me out, please include "is a fan of pink flamingos" in that google doc actually.

7. Watership Down (1978), PG - here's a good breather after that last movie, and serendipity to round this first section out. animated by the same company as the plague dogs, and based off a book by the same author as well, watership down is probably the #1 infamous "violent and bloody animated animal movie". but if you haven't seen it since you were a kid, now's the time to revisit it. its reputation is blown out of proportion - the violence is no worse than, say, a warrior cats AMV. but the story itself? genuinely great and withstanding. this one's been my fav since middle school, for real.

(putting the rest under a read-more for length! u should know what to expect by now wrt the genre range I'm covering here as we only move further down the iceberg)

+ here's a wayback machine link in case the read more ever goes down x

Part Two: creature feature

8. The Thing (1982), R - now THIS is some classic 80s practical effects horror. it's been too long since I've seen this one but I remember the tension being palatable. oh my god they made amongus into a movie??? also there's a fucked up evil dog! idk what else to say about it, I'm scared of antarctica now lol.

9. Ju-On: The Grudge (2002), R - the third installment of the ju-on horror series, this movie has great special effects and memorable ghosts. if you haven't watched any japanese horror movies yet, this is a great intro.

10. Bram Stoker's Dracula* (1992), R - uh oh babyyyyy we're in vampire territory now!!! although the slow plot of dracula routinely fails to hold me, the beautiful cinematography and establishing vampire lore makes this the must-see beginner film for the next few movies on this list.

11. Only Lovers Left Alive (2013), R - the modern vampire romance to end all vampire romances. like the last one, this is a slower movie, but I thought it'd be fun to add here as a comparison (or perhaps even as a foil) to the last. also the vampires in this movie are sooo beautiful in an etheral way, it's unreal 😳.

12. Interview With the Vampire (1994), R - picture this: a coven of vampires impersonates themselves as a theatre troop. now, in front of a human audience, they put on a "play". vampires pretending to be humans pretending to be vampires (how avant garde!). now at the climax of this performance, they actually kill and eat a live mortal woman. the audience, believing this all to be acting, do nothing but watch as the woman on stage screams for help. all this and more can be yours for the low low price of watching this movie.

13. The Queen of the Damned (2002), R - did you enjoy that last movie? well here's the sequel! - but don't expect this one to have anywhere near the same contemplative tone. instead, this one sports a nu-metal soundtrack and an off-the-rails plot to match (side note: world famous rockstar lestat's "coming out" as a vampire speech, totally reads like a coming out speech a la brian slade's in velvet goldmine, lol). if you're the kind of person who still watches twilight out of middle school nostalgia, this movie's the one for you. except the characters in this movie aren't mormons - they're goth!

14. The Lost Boys (1987), R - you know that fantasy you always have about running away to the california coast, joining a gay commie vampire polycule, and then eating innocent people every night, riding on ur matching 80s vampire motorcycles all the while? well that's what this movie is! in this horror-comedy (which is way too campy to ever actually horrify), the main character's transformation into a half-vampire reads as a gay awakening/coming out story, and the costume design is more than outstanding. this is honestly the highlight of these vampire movies imo, and maybe the highlight of the 80s as well!

15. What We Do in the Shadows (2015), R- a great way to tie off these last few, and this last section as a whole: what we do in the shadows is a genre-referential mockumentory about vampires. both this movie, and the spin-off tv show it inspired, are a genuinely funny and genius take on the vampire myth. ntm the re-watchability in this one is off the charts!

Part Three: the real monsters all along

16. Saw (2004), R- this franchise may be infamous for being shallow torture porn, but the first movie has a genuine plot to it and isn't any more gory than your average horror movie. a mystery more than anything, saw is about two men trying to find their way out of a deadly puzzle, and maybe even learning a lesson along the way. (<- and/or learning that they're gay, if the popular tumblr fanon is to be believed hfgjdfh).

17. Parasite (2019), R - this thriller deserved every amount of praise it received when it was released. it discusses the horrors of capitalistic inequality (especially that in south korea) in such a brilliant way by setting up for one plot, and then completely turning it on its head halfway through. great plot twists and a thrilling climax, 10/10.

18. Carrie (1979), R - a coming-of-age supernatural horror movie with the most sympathetic main character in the world, carrie is just as much a tragedy as anything else. side note: if you've been following along with all of these movies, this film would be fun to compare and contrast with ginger snaps! (I expect a 2 page times new roman essay about it on my desk by monday thx).

19. Hellraiser* (1987), R - an extremely horny and gory 80s horror movie about a group of sadomasochistic entities torturing and killing people in a practical effects masterpiece. meanwhile, another character tries to bring himself back from the dead in a manner equally as horrifying. if you love good gore, this is the crown jewel. if you're squeamish about torture...... .. . ... sorry.

20. Tetsuo the Iron Man* (1989), unrated but I give it a solid R - a japanese cyberpunk body horror film about a man who undergoes a curse slowly transforming him from flesh into metal and machinery. the plot can be hard to follow at times, but the body horror is genuinely incredible (and nasty!) and the fight scenes towards the end get super fun.

21. Scream* (1996), R - a genre-referential slasher, though beginners to the genre will absolutely "get it" too (you'll notice this list itself is lacking in slasher movies oops). this movie can feel a bit full of itself at times (imo), but it pulls of horror-comedy in a way that's been rarely pulled off since.

22. Train to Busan (2016), unrated but I'd give it an R - a claustophobic action adventure zombie horror movie with incredible heart at its core! I can't remember if I cried at the end, but if I didn't then I came close. if nothing else on this entire list strikes you, just watch this movie, please.

23. Mysterious Skin* (2005), NC-17 - generally I don't recommend this movie to people due to its content, but I figured if pink flamingos can be on this list, so can this one. this coming of age drama may be a respite from all the horror films in this section, but it's still by far the most upsetting imo. mysterious skin follows the story of two teen boys living parallel (yet often intertwining) lives in a small town, one a sex worker, and the other a UFO conspiracy theorist. this movie is incredibly moving, disturbing, thought provoking - and also the kind of movie I watched once and will never watch again.

24. The Crow* (1994), R - remember when superhero movies were good? this is a superhero movie but good. a goth and undead rockstar goes on a killing spree getting revenge on those who killed him and his wife - all on devil's night. and when I saw goth, I do mean goth; the cure recorded a song for this soundtrack, and it's still my favorite thing they've ever done.

Part Four: halloween week!

25. Rob Zombie's Halloween* (2007), R - yeah yeah yeah I'm putting this one before the original, but in my defense I'm saving the original for the 31st slot (halloween night...). most of the remakes and sequels in this slasher franchise aren't necessarily worth checking out on their own - but this one is. a sympathetic and rob-zombie-core take on the plot of the first halloween, I'm still convinced michael myers did nothing wrong.

26. House of Wax (2005), R - this movie plays My Chemical Romance for the end credits. helena by my chemical romance plays at the end of this movie. hey did you know that -- yeah I'm still not over this fact. uhm. the movie itself is pretty cool too. idk it's a 2005 slasher movie with a hot antagonist, have fun!

27. House of 1,000 Corpses* (2002), R - if you hated rob zombie's halloween, you'll hate this one too. but it you loved rob zombie's halloween... well good news! literally all of his movies are the same! this is a rob-zombie-core slasher with fun character designs and truly despicable antagonists, plus dwight from the office is in this one! this movie's about as campy and fun as a slasher can get.

28. Eraserhead (1977), unrated but probably an R idk - movies of ALL time, I'm truly obsessed with this one. eraserhead is an experimental and surreal body horror film by david lynch and about fears of fatherhood (among other things). this movie follows its plot in such a way that it makes me feel like I'm watching it in a pretentious new york art gallery black box theatre or something, sitting in silence among my classmates who are also visiting on our field trip. top tier lynch film.

29. The Addam's Family (1991), PG-13 - believe it or not, I have surprising few opinions on this movie! look, it's the addam's family. I'm sure u at least know the vibes of this franchise, right? halloween comedy? well here, watch it and have fun between all those weird and fucked up movies I keep throwing at u.

30. Noroi: the Curse (2005), unrated but probably around an R- movies that scared me SO bad I couldn't sleep at all, this film is a japanese horror mystery that's been compared to the x-files but don't let that fool you. between disturbing body horror, legitimately startling ghost effects, and many unsettling found footage shaky cams, the x-files wishes it were even a tenth as horrifying as this documentary-style movie is.

31. Halloween (1978), R - my wife!!!! my wife is here!!!!!! (author's note: michael myers is my male wife, thank you). no, ofc this movie isn't "good" but it's a slasher and it's fun, and the first time I ever watched it was perhaps the most fun I've ever had on a halloween night in my life, so I Absolutely recommend this one if you love silly 70s horror and want to have a good time!

and that's it!!!! 31 movie recommendations from me to you! watch these all in the order I gave you, or pick and choose based on my reviews, it's up to you! either way, I hope this is fun and helpful to at least somebody, and feel free to reblog or save this post to your heart's delight <3

#horror #horror movies #halloween #I'm not tagging all those franchises but uhhh idk lmk if there's any other tags u think I should use on this cause that's all I've got #freaky movie fall #<- for my own archives lol

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sinner-as-saint · 4 years

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À la folie.

Bastard son!Bucky x Baker!reader HC (as requested by you horny ballsacks)

Run-through: The King’s bastard son is the complete opposite of his step-brother. Unlike Steve, Bucky is shameless, authoritative, reckless and arrogant. He’s spoilt, and has a habit of taking whatever he wants without a second thought. And recently, he’s had his eyes on you...

Themes: stalkish!bucky, smut, slight dub con, breeding kink, jealous!bucky

Bucky had been watching you; sneakily, each time you came to the castle.

You were usually accompanied by your father, but on some days you come by on your own with your baskets of baked goods.

Bucky’s intentions were never pure when it came to you. He talked to you often, but you were always too shy to look him in the eyes

Whenever he saw you, his mind would be filled with filthy thoughts immediately. It got to a point where he forgot what it was like to look at you and not instantly want to have you in his bed, gripping his sheets and making you scream his name

He wanted you, desperately. He was madly infatuated and almost enamored.

Whenever he was around, you felt the tension between the two of you as well. He made you nervous, and made your heart race whenever he was around.

And one day he finally has you all to himself. Initially, he planned on taking you in his majestic bed. But then he saw you talking to his ‘perfect’ step-brother and his jealousy took over

He followed you that day, and cornered you right before you could leave the castle basement, where they store food

Trapping you between his large, muscular body and the stone wall behind you; he stared down at you and you trembled.

“I saw you talking to Steve earlier. You two seem friendly.” he sounded bitter and angry. He was always jealous of his brother, and he hated the sight of you and Steve together.

You opened your mouth to respond, but shut yourself up as soon as you saw him clench his jaw.

Bucky leaned in to gently brush his lips against your own, and chuckled when you shivered.

“Guess I have to make you mine before anyone else does, huh?”

You didn’t dare speak. You knew this was immoral and probably wrong but, he was still the King’s son. He could have whatever he desired.

Bucky fucked you right there, against the wall. And there was nothing gentle about him.

He would be rough. Growling in your ear in his deep, low voice while he pounds into you from behind. Your cheek and palms pressed against the wall while he grips your hips and just keeps ramming his cock in and out of you while you whimper and moan.

“So good... you’re mine, you hear me?” he’d say through gritted teeth, making tingles dance down your spine. You could only whine as a reply. Your body welcomed him in deliciously as he filled you up each time, speeding up with each thrust.

His hand reached out to wrap around your throat as he pressed his body further into you, staying still for a moment once his cock was snug inside you. You whimpered at how full you felt.

“You’re mine.” he’d growl before thrusting into you again, harder than earlier and making you cum around his cock in no time.

You felt him pull out and felt his cum drip down your thighs, as he bit down on your neck to keep himself quiet. He pulled away to look at all the bite marks he left on your skin; smirking.

“There. All mine.”

After that day, his need to have you all times only grew more and more. Whenever you were at the castle and he was around, all he had to do was give you that look. And you immediately understood that you had to hurry and go wait for him in his room where he would make you scream his name for hours

It became a habit.

You would start spending more and more time in his majestic bed, in secrecy. Although you were sure the guards could hear all of what goes on in that room.

You got up trying to leave his bed and go home for the night one day, but he stopped you by grabbing your arm and pulling back under the blankets with him.

“Stay.” was all he said, circling an arm around you.

“I have to to go.” you tried reasoning with him. He opened his eyes and glared at you.

“My parents must be waiting.” you spoke again and he chuckled.

Without another word said, he slipped his hand in between your legs under the covers. He toyed with your clit and smeared your wetness around before slipping his fingers inside of you. “Yeah? Well then i better tell them not to expect you home anytime soon. Because you’re busy being my good little whore..”

He’d stroke your walls gently, perfectly; making you grip the sheets tightly and moan his name under your breath sinfully. “How you spread those pretty legs for me whenever i ask you to.” he whispered along your jaw, kissing your skin as he pumps his finger in and out of you. You were sure you were dripping all over his hand by now. “Or how your little slut mouth takes my cock so perfectly each time, huh?”

He ended up fucking you again. Pounding into you at an insane speed, looking you deep in the eyes as he makes you cum around him. “Take it, you little whore. You’re body is begging for me... “ he’d whisper in your ear. “You’re all mine!”

and just like that, you’d forget all about wanting to go home.

Bucky was obsessed with you. With your body, with the sounds you made when he fucked you and how your body squirmed under his. He absolutely hated it when any other man even talked to you.

One day you went home, after surprisingly not running into him the whole time you were at the castle. And there he was, waiting for you in your bedroom.

“Why are you late?” he asked, shamelessly eyeing you up and down. He noticed you were trying to hide one single rose behind the skirt of your dress but he pointed it out. “Who gave you that?”

Seeing you weren’t replying, he stepped forward and grabbed your chin gently tilting your head back so you looked him in the eyes. “Answer me.”

“Thor.” you answered sheepishly. Thor was a knight, a very handsome one. And Bucky hated him since the day he first saw him trying to talk to you. And now he dared give you a flower?

Bucky was furious. And he didn’t hold back that day. He fucked you like he owned you.

His hand pinned you down on your bed by your throat while he pushed into you, stretching you out. Your soft whimpers and cries only fueled his desire to have you and truly make you his.

Again, there was nothing gentle about him when he was in moods like these. He was wild, and passionate; fucking you like there’s no tomorrow.

He’d tighten his grip around your throat as he speeds up into you, growling right in your ear and telling you that you belong to him. “I want to see you swollen with my child, so everyone knows that you belong to me.” he hissed in your ear; speeding up again.

Your heart raced at his words. It was overwhelming; his voice, his weight on top of you, his cock... oh but you craved more.

“Can already imagine you... with a big bump, and my child safe inside you. No one would be allowed to touch you, or talk to you or even look at you. You’ll be entirely mine.” he whispered in your ear, in a daze as he pounds into you.

He released your throat and placed his hand on your abdomen, pressing down on your front so he can feel himself inside you. He stared into your eyes while he speeds up into you again. “You will be mine, forever. You’ll warm my bed every night and have my children.”

He pressed his lips to yours, swallowing all your moans and mewls as he came inside of you. You felt his warm load shooting at your walls as he shoved his tongue past your lips, his beard rubbing and scratching your skin. You felt his presence everywhere.

But he wasn’t done yet, he flipped you around and pulled you onto your hands and knees and pushed into you again from behind. His grip on your hips would surely leave a bruise.

Bucky pounded into you mercilessly, fucking you like he had always dreamt of. Bending and contorting your body however he liked. He came in you again. Then took you again. And again.

“That’s right... moan for me... beg.”

His thick cock touched you in all the right places, making you orgasm like never before, filling you up with his cum over and over again.

“You’re mine.” he growled again as he pulled away to admire his work of art. Marks left behind on your skin, bite marks along your thighs, and your neck, his cum leaking out of you while you closed your eyes and panted under him; both of you hot and sweaty in your bed.

He slipped his fingers back into you and fingered his cum into you again like a madman, making you arch your back and scream, he didn’t care about how sensitive you were, he just needed to remind you and everyone else that you belonged to him.

“You will have my children, won’t you sweetheart?” he whispered against your lips as he pumps his fingers in and out of you. “You’re gonna be so beautiful, all big and swollen, filled with my seed for everyone to see. Mine.” he growled in your ear, wrapping his arm around you protectively.

---

@brown-bi-beautiful

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mgsdays · 4 years

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do u know any other comics/BLs like 19days? #🥪

Hey dear!

Ohh that's a good question. I don't know any quite like 19 days, an ongoing story that is ultra slow burn. I have read some other amazing BLs though. Here's some that I like:

Totally Captivated

• Complete | 49 chapters plus some extras

• General vibe: humor, romance

If you like the mafia background of 19 days, an amazing manhwa is Totally Captivated. Lighthearted, fun and very hot 🔥 One character gives me strong He Tian vibes, both in appearance and in attitude. Plus, the main couple has some fantastic chemistry.

Summary: Jung Ewon has always let his curiosity get the best of him, but even he could not have predicted that his latest venture would lead to him working for the mafia.

After cheating on his boyfriend and consequently being dumped, Ewon longs for the two of them to reconcile. However, his ex's new boyfriend, the handsome Eun Mookyul, begins to take an interest in him. Finding Ewon intriguing, Mookyul, a mafia boss, decides that he wants Ewon to become his underling—and that's just the start of Ewon's problems.

As the new errand boy in Mookyul's gang, Ewon must now learn to navigate the dangerous world of the mafia all while resisting the advances of his ex-boyfriend's new lover. Should he give in to his desires, he will risk more than just another heartbreak.

At the End of the Road

• Complete | 57 chapters plus extras

• General vibe: dark themes, romance, plot heavy

The summary makes this one sound pretty complicated so I procrastinated checking it out for a bit. When I finally read it I was blown away. The plot is incredible, the romantic interest is ugh so good. The entire story leaves me with a warm feeling of destiny and serendipity. It gets dark and it demands quite a bit of attention but it is definitely worthwhile.

Summary: After a car accident, Taemin finds himself in the body of Siwon, a victim of bullying at school. No longer a pushover, he starts standing up for himself but then meets Woojin, an old friend from the past. Somehow, Woojin immediately picks up Taemin's 'scent' from Siwon. What happened between these two in the past and how will it affect their future?

Walk on Water

• Complete | 62 chapters

• General vibe: romance, hot sex

Ok, this one is a delight to read. It's another one of those "straight guy goes gay for the right guy" kind of plot, but it's beautifully done. The characters' progress feels authentic. You're on the edge of your seat rooting for them. Plus, the art is amazing?? I'd stop reading sometimes just to admire it. @ the artist you didn't have to go this hard and yet you did dude!! Fantstic job.

Plus the sex scenes are just on fire. Phew 🥵

Explicit sex so don't check it out if you're under 18, stay safe, yadda, yadda.

Summary: To earn money, Ed decided to enter the pornographic industry. Secretly, he begins working under the alias of "Tommy". One day, it was suddenly decided that he would be filming as a bottom instead of a top and he's doing it with the famous Glen McQueen as his partner?

No. 6

• Complete | 9 books or 9 mangas (I read the books actually, but the manga is the same story)

• General vibe: social commentary, romance, plot heavy

My all time favorite on the list might be No. 6. No. 6 reads more like 'social political commentary ft. a couple that happens to be boys', rather than a boys love story per see. The plot doesn't revolve around their romance, their romance is also happening in the midst of the chaos. And it is beautiful to watch.

Story wise, No. 6 is a dystopic tale, and it brings up themes of consumption under capitalism, outsourcing of labor, outsorcing of inequalities and goverment control. It's not recent so you might have read it already - if you haven't I can't recommend it enough.

A PERFECT LIFE, IN A PERFECT CITY

For Shion, an elite student in the technologically sophisticated city No. 6, life is carefully choreographed. School, study, and the occasional visit with his friend and classmate Safu. One fateful day, however, he takes a misstep, sheltering an injured boy his age from a typhoon. Known only as Rat, this boy is a VC – a fugitive living outside the computerized tapestry of city control – and helping him will throw Shion’s life into chaos and start him down a path to discovering the appalling secrets behind the superficial perfection of No. 6.

Seven Days

• Complete | 2 volumes

• General vibe: school life, romance

No way you haven't read this, but just in case: seven days!! Go check out seven days!! Seven Days is the BL. School life plots peaked with this one haha It's just two volumes and the story is beautifully done. I re-read from time to time when I want a pick me up.

Summary: On a whim, high school third-year Yuzuru Shino asks out first-year Toji Seryo, who is notorious for being a weeklong lover—he’ll date the first girl to ask him out Monday morning and then promptly dump her by the following Monday! The boys start dating, and by Tuesday, the first inklings of attraction hit. Can these two put words to their feelings before Monday comes, or are old habits too hard to break?

Blue Sky Complex

• Complete | 23 chapters

• General vibe: school life, humor, romance

Another school life story for the list. Blue Sky Complex has some truly hilarious moments, with teenage fumblings that ache with how true to life they are. Zero drama, zero outside interference, just the two main characters slowly (but surely) figuring things out.

Summary: Narasaki only wanted a place where he could sit and read books in peace, but was blackmailed by his teacher into supervising a delinquent called Terashima while working at the school library.

As they spend their days in silent but close proximity, they begin to feel drawn to each other. And then...

Doukyuusei

• Complete | 2 volumes (second is called Sotsugyousey)

• General vibe: lightehearted fun

Fun fact: I went to Japan once and I wanted to buy a book in Japanese just to have it, you know? I don't speak Japanese, I just wanted a book as a souvenir. I bought Doukyuusei. Clearly I'm biased towards this story in particular haha

Everything by this author is gold. Their art style flows, the characters have a certain lightness to them that makes them almost dance in the pages. The author usually draw at least one of the leads with long hair and the hair is so well done, GOD. I could gush about the hair all day.

Perhaps one of the most realistic ones of the list, Doukyuusei is a school life story about when you meet someone at just the right time.

Summary: "A boy boy met a boy. They were in the flush of youth. They were in love that felt like a dream, like sparkling soda pop."

High school students Hiraku Kusakabe and Rihito Sajou are as different as day and night. But opposites attract and before they know it, they've embarked on a journey neither one can quite define but which anyone with eyes can see is "Love."

Mo Dao Zu Shi

• Complete | 126 chapters

• General vibe: slow burn, historical, epic romance

At the risk of being very cliche here: if you haven't read Mo Dao Zu Shi, you're wasting time. Go. This one isn't a manga, but it a fantastic book. It became uber famous for a reason, you know? All the attention is very much deserved. I can't emphasize enough how good it is.

You can watch the TV show The Untamed as well (and the acting is fantastic) but, to me, the experience is just not the same. The TV show removes all explicit romance references from the story, in order to comply with China's censorship. The book leaves nothing out. It is very much a romance, through and through, and it's an epic one. There's slow burn, pining, misunderstandings, fighting everything and everyone for your loved one and coming out stronger on the other side. Truly worth the read.

As the grandmaster who founded the Demonic Path, Wei Wuxian roamed the world in his wanton ways, hated by millions for the chaos he created. In the end, he was backstabbed by his brother and killed by powerful clans that combined to overpower him. He incarnates into the body of a lunatic who was abandoned by his clam and is later, unwillingly, taken away by a famous cultivator among the clans — Lan Wanji. This marks the start of a thrilling yet hilarious journey of attacking monsters, solving mysteries, and raising children. From the mutual flirtation along the way, Wei Wuxian slowly realizes that Lan Wangji, a seemingly haughty and indifferent poker-face, holds more feelings for Wei Wuxian than he is letting on.

#19 days #ask box #anon 🥪#hope you're doing good anon!#let me know if you read any of these 👀

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