#sewer back up

[izzystizzys]

Echo’s world has gone decidedly… wobbly. Blurry. Fuzzy at the edges, and what-will-you-else. He can’t feel his fingertips, is his first thought. Kriffing overdid it on the glowing green shots, is his second.

“Holy kriff, Echo, that manhole-cover underneath you is moving!”, Fives exclaims, third. Or more like slurs into Lt. Jesse’s shoulder, who is himself moaning indistinctly into the Captain’s pauldron, who is in turn swaying back and forth gesturing at Commander Cody.

And it really is - the manhole cover, that is, once Echo stumbles off it with a shriek. Jumping up into the now open air with sudden force, steadying and then scraping across paveme-

“Are those kriffing hands?!”

In an instant, seven highly drunk pairs of fists and one blaster, courtesy of Commander Cody (the only one present who’s sober enough to be legally handling it) are aimed in a circle around the cover slowly being shuffled to the side, then the hands reaching up to palm at the edges of the hole -

- and are slowly being lowered again when two white-red painted helmets are heaved into view, along with chest-deep groaning and grunting. Two armored Corries collapse in a heap at Commander Cody’s feet, who stares down at them in open-mouthed shock.

Slowly, Echo blinks. Slowly, he raises a hand to snap his fingers in front of his face. No, still there. Slowly, Fives grabs for a piece of flank underneath his blacks and twists. Echo yelps, and slaps his hand away hard enough to hurt himself. “OI!”

“B’have, boys”, Captain Rex makes a brave attempt to slur out as he sways on his feet, still staring down at the trembling heap of armor at their feet. Whoa, Echo didn’t know they had those kinds of funky armor designs in the Guard. Very avant-garde.

“That’s blood, Ey’ika”, says Appo.

Oh.

Slowly, Hardcase raises his right foot, inching towards-

“Don’t even think about it”, Commander Cody snaps, and Hardcase’s foot whips back to the ground next to its companion. Fives chortles. “Yeah, genius, those are Commander kamas - they’d put you down in a second flat!”

“Why would two Corrie Commanders go crawling out of holes in front of 79’s, huh, genius?!”, Hardcase retorts, somewhat justly, Echo feels. Next to him, Commander Cody frowns, and kneels carefully. “Good question, trooper. Fox, can you hear me? Fox’i-“

Which is when one of the bodies - Commander Fox, Echo realizes with a shudder, The Marshall Commander Fox - convulses on the ground, and an arm rears up to nail Cody face-first with the back of a hand, sending him sprawling back into the pavement with an undignified squawk.

“Thorn”, the sad figure that is the highest decorated clone in existence groans, still faceplanted into pavement, “Thorn, I’m hallucinating Cody. Thorn, tell him to shut up.”

“Shuddup”, Commander Thorn heaves, loyally. Cody makes an affronted noise, braced back on his shebs. “Sdubid Codeh.”

Commander Fox’s visor scrapes against the ground with his nod, a sound that sends the surrounding vod’e cringing. “Yeah, you go, Thorn. You’re my favorite.” A considering pause. “Oh, kark. I need to call in medevac - Fox to Stabby, Fox to Stabby - the kriffing Narglatches are back on the lower levels.”

The Commander’s comm crackles to life, as he heaves himself over with a punched-out moan - oh, yup, that dark patch’s definitely not paint, and are those teeth marks?! On plastoid??

“I’m going to wring Senator Hliii’s neck, and then I’m going to twist him into a human kriffing meat-lasso to catch every last one of his little pets with”, sounds through Fox’s comm, who just hacks out a laughcough in response. “Pinging your location now. Where’s Thorn?”

“Pr’snt”, slurs Thorn.

“Concussed”, adds Fox, “We crawled out forty levels to behind 79’s, so no one would see us.”

Awkward silence follows.

“Uh, about that”, begins Rex, only to be interrupted by a deep groan from Fox.

“Oh, you’ve got to be kriffing kidding me! As if Cody’s ugly mug wasn’t - WHAT THE KRIFF ARE YOUR KRIFFING ARC KARKHEADS DOING IN MY HALLUCINATION, REX?!”

“Shuddup, Rex”, Thorn moans bravely.

[hammity-hammer]

what if instead of steddie both being uber flirty n obvious n oblivious what actually happens is as such: steve starts being so gay for eddie on main & just flirts with him and talks about how he loves him in the most ridiculous and overt ways, so everyone thinks it's a joke bc obviously steve isn't gay, and eddie usually is just like "okay steve, cool" with an eyeroll, or just brushes it off & lets steve be an idiot & make a fool of himself

but sometimes eddie will say the most horrendously vulgar things about what he'll do to steve (in front of steve) and as soon as steve reciprocates he just,,,,, moves on?? like he didn't just talk about slurping that man so silly he'd make goofy look serious or something

and everyone just thinks that eddie hates steve, but actually he loves steve sososooso much and they're so in love and gay and their love languages just happen to be VASTLY different-- and when they're in private eddie is a loving affectionate boyfriend who gives steve everything he needs<3

[caspersscareschool]

he literally sews his kids stupid little outfits from scratch does anyone even fucking care

[seagull-scribbles]

'Best man' can’t even tie a bow tie 💒

[skeletalheartattack]

[tacagen]

ah yes. agent bishop, a well-known wedding enjoyer.

[moeblob]

My personal villain arch is having to stop drawing a comic to draw a ten minute OC doodle because of storms (this is the third stormy day in a row).

[your-stranger-halfblood-things]

Sometimes it's okay to beat things up *grabs baseball bat* PENNYWISE GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE

[beybuniki]

he's so funny in rotmnt, much more energetic than in mutant mayhem ALSO im feel so aouhhhhhihkös about mikey being the one who kind of craves human contact the most 🚬👵🏻💔

[effrvsnt107]

As Aro/Carlisle shippers have we realised that Aro is the more loud ex who just wants his baby back, BUT CARLISLE LEGIT HAS A PAINTING OF HIS EX IN HIS ROOM WITH HIS NEW FAMILY? Like…Carlisle why do you hang that massive portrait of your ex and his brothers in your office…do you need to talk to someone or???

[mishy-mashy]

[i-mode]

when i.v drops i will make a vellory google doc and ill have my own pepe silvia moment. Everyone will see the truth eventually

[dysfunctional-doodle]

You heard about the Lush x TMNT collab? Now you can have all your boys as bath bombs and exfoliate with turtle power.

Fuck yeah

(I actually have never brought or used a bath bomb lol, do I break the trend and buy one for “da boys”?)

[clonerightsagenda]

vynofiron please update us if you find out

Last I heard they were wandering around the area looking for promising looking holes and might try dumping red dye into the street the next time it rains so I will certainly keep everyone posted on the slapstick routine that is my life

[creatureesque]

LOOK AT MY DURGE SEROH AGAIN LOOK AT HER LOOK AT HER AND LOOK AT HER MAGE WIFE NOWWWWW!!!!! explanations for two of the drawings are in the tags :)

[turtlehyperfixationgoburrr]

high rn and thinking. hey man why was a rat w four turtles in the sewer. why ninjitsu.