#she even complained to my actual teacher in front of me and referred to me as 'that thing'

[variantoutcast]

Not sure how to insert a read more on mobile so this post about my personal experiences with transphobia and ableisn will be in the tags only 👍

[m1ckeyb3rry]

CONGRATS ON 500 FOLLOWERS WOOO!! its been a little over a year since ive found your writting, how time flies T-T Could you possibly write a platonic gojo & reader oneshot where its just snippets of Gojo's first year teaching and the reader is a 1st year student not part of jujutsu society? I'd prefer if the mc had a somewhat introverted personality while being grumpy bc of being forced to attend the school. U can change their behaviour to what u feel more comfortable writing if u want tho!!

── THE SCHOLAR

Synopsis: A short snippet of how Satoru Gojo convinces you to be his first student in full.

Event Masterlist

Pairing: Gojo & Reader

Chapter Word Count: 2.6k

Content Warnings: not many tbh…reader is a d1 hater of gojo and ino ig?? also just a hater in general LMAO she does NOT want to be there

A/N: wow anon i can’t believe it’s been a year since you found my account and that you’ve stuck around for so long, that means a lot to me!! i apologize for how long this took me and how short it is 😫 it was a bit difficult for me to write gojo as a teacher without feeling like i was just rehashing his dynamic w a previous y/n i’ve written 😓 but i hope this is somewhat close to what you wanted?? also idk if you’ve read my fic pomegranate ink or not but i did throw in a reference to it at one point so props to anyone who catches that hehe

Additional: part of my 500 follower event! see the event description and rules to make a request of your own.

You weren’t really sure what cause your classmate had to be as pleased as he was, but for some reason, the boy was bouncing in his seat, scribbling down notes with the fervor of a scholar — though you were quite certain that he was nothing of the sort, at least not when his test scores were taken into consideration. 

“Hey,” you whispered, tossing an eraser at his head when your teacher’s back was turned. “Ino. What’s the big deal? We’re not even learning anything yet, so what are you writing down?”

“Are you kidding me? Gojo just told us an entire story of his past. That’s valuable information!” Ino said. You frowned at him.

“It’s not valuable information, because he’s so prone to embellishment that he’s all but an author at this point. Besides, do you think you, or anyone else for that matter, will ever face seven first grades and come out the winner, without even a scratch?” you said.

“He’s the strongest sorcerer in the world, though, so it’s feasible for him,” Ino said.

“Right,” you said, rolling your eyes. “Maybe for him, but not for anyone else. This is just bragging under the guise of an educational opportunity. We’re never going to be powerful enough to replicate such a feat, so what’s the use in wasting our time talking about it?”

“You’re such a spoil-sport,” Ino huffed. “We’re the first students to ever get to learn from Satoru Gojo, and somehow, you’re complaining about it? That’s ridiculous no matter what way you put it!”

“Is everything okay?” 

Both you and Ino jumped as Satoru Gojo appeared in front of your desks, peering down at you over the lenses of his dark glasses. He didn’t seem annoyed that you were talking while he was ‘teaching’; in fact, he looked excited, as if he wanted to join in the conversation as well. You could imagine him pulling up a chair and resting his chin in his hands as he gossiped with you, and it made you scoff.

“Everything’s fine. We were just wondering when you were actually going to start the lesson,” you said.

“She was wondering that!” Ino rushed to clarify. You shot him a dirty look out of the corner of your eye, which he ignored — you supposed loyalty didn’t mean much to him, as you two weren’t really friends and therefore couldn’t inspire much loyalty in one another regardless. “I was telling her how fascinated I am by the story you were telling!”

“Suck-up,” you hissed.

“Stupid,” he hissed back. Gojo clapped his hands, returning to the front of the classroom with a distinctly unacademic swagger to his step that made you internally fume.

“No worries, we’re just getting to that part! Today, we’ll go over some basic curse theory,” he said, drawing simplistic shapes on the chalkboard to accompany his explanations. As usual, Ino was absorbed by the standard bullshit Gojo spouted, but you found it to be so boring that you actually began to nod off, catching up on the sleep you had missed last night due to a mission which had run later than expected.

Unlike Ino, who had been automatically enrolled in the school because of his family lineage, you had been scouted as a fresh talent by Satoru Gojo himself. It had been a long conversation, and he had only managed to convince you in the end by telling you all about Kaito Hinode, the well-regarded first year teacher who you would study under. Hinode was a sorcerer you believed you wouldn’t have trouble respecting, and so you begrudgingly agreed to attend the school and give the whole notion of ‘jujutsu sorcery’ a shot.

Then Hinode retired, mere weeks before you were set to begin at the school, and his replacement was revealed to be none other than that irreverent, inept, and decidedly unserious man who you had secretly hoped you would not see much more of: Satoru Gojo.

You didn’t even want to be a sorcerer in active duty, but the theoretical side of it interested you to an almost unhealthy extent. You spent days upon days studying the workings of curses and cursed energy, to the point that you could be considered almost an expert. That was the only thing cheering you about coming to the school, that you’d get to discuss with individuals on your level, and so it had been such a heartbreaking disappointment when Gojo, who cared little about the causes and more about the results, was the only proper sorcerer you came into frequent contact with.

The other teachers didn’t have time to entertain your pestering, far too busy with their own students, which meant that Gojo was really your only option. And of course you had tried — really, you had. You had presented him with your questions and ideas, but he had only made a face and told you that studying curse theory to this extent wouldn’t help anyone, and least of all yourself.

He wanted you to learn how to fight, but you didn’t care for that. You didn’t want to fight. If you could spend the rest of your days shut away in a study, reading your books and taking notes on them, then you’d be quite content. You were reluctant to go on missions, even if you were ten times better than your peers, and you often dragged your feet heading into your practical classes. More than once, Ino had had to hoist you over his shoulders and sprint to the training field so that you were not both late, and you knew that you probably shouldn’t be so harsh on him given that, but because it meant that you had to exert yourself on the battlefield instead of rereading your favorite essays, his good intentions only made you resent him more.

“You know, you could really be a great sorcerer,” Gojo said to you one day. You were sitting on a bench while Ino did exercises, ink smudging your hand as you meticulously annotated a book that the principal had given to you. You blinked up at him, amazed once again at how tall he was. He blocked out the sunlight, his shadow looming over you in a way that would’ve been ominous if he wasn’t so typically harmless.

“Hm?” you said, returning to your book when you realized he wasn’t going to say anything of importance. “Sure, I guess I could be.”

“Becoming a first grade isn’t an impossibility for you. It’s something attainable, which is incredibly rare for someone as young as you,” he continued.

“Right,” you said.

“Do you care about that, though?” he said.

“Nope,” you said. “I have no interest in being a first grade sorcerer. It just means more dangerous missions, doesn’t it? I don’t care about all of that.”

“It also means a higher salary,” he said.

“Probably not high enough to make up for the risks,” you said.

“Well, it’s pretty high, though only you can decide if it makes up for the risks or not,” he said.

“Listen, sir, I’m only even here because you told me I could further my studies with people renowned in their fields. Do you mind telling me what field you’re renowned in? Because for some unfathomable reason, you’ve ended up as my teacher,” you said.

“I’m…the strongest sorcerer? In the world?” he said, though the way he phrased it made it seem like he was asking you instead of telling. You shrugged.

“That’s an intrinsic talent. You didn’t learn to be that way; you were just born with it. Sure, you had to practice, but practicing and studying are different. Anyways, even if you are the strongest soldier, I think we’ve established that that’s not something I’m interested in. I was supposed to be under the tutelage of wise and experienced professors, but instead, I’m being instructed by you, who’s barely even a few years my elder and has never taught before,” you said, closing your book and holding it to your chest, smiling tightly at him. “I’m staying here because my parents already paid the tuition fee, but I’m not happy about it. Just so you know.”

“If you’re a first grade sorcerer, you also get more access to information,” he said after a moment. “Stuff behind a million clearances that only people of a sufficiently high rank get access to.”

You froze, your eyes brightening at the thought of this forbidden knowledge. You already knew that you were missing several key pieces in your preliminary research, but no matter how hard you looked, you had never been able to find the answers to the seemingly obvious questions. Was this why? Was it really because you did not have the seniority to warrant the understanding?

“Is that truly the case?” you said.

“I can’t help you in terms of books and learning and all of that boring stuff,” he said. “But if you put in a bit more effort, I can turn you into someone that the higher ups listen to, instead of the other way around.”

You mulled this over before nodding, standing up and leaving your book on the bench.

“Okay. I’ll do as you tell me to, but like I said earlier, I’m not going to be happy about it,” he said.

“Who cares? You can be the gloomiest girl alive!” he said, reaching out to ruffle your hair. “Let’s work together, Y/N!”

“I’m your student,” you reminded him. “Not your friend.” 

He waved you off. “You’re old enough to be both. Now let’s get to training!”

It was horrible, being Gojo’s favorite student. For one, Ino was jealous — although soon enough he found another mentor to cotton on to, and then your relationship with him mended into something a little more cordial and polite. For another, Gojo had this strange penchant for throwing you into impossible situations and watching in glee as you struggled to get out of them.

His missions also tended to be errands disguised as pressing matters. Once, he made you run around Tokyo, stopping in various stores so that you could improve your conditioning — stores which just so happened to carry the items on his week’s grocery list. Another time, you single-handedly had to exorcise every single curse harassing a nearby bakery — a bakery which just so happened to carry a specialty flavor of cake that was his new favorite. Whenever you complained about the silly chores, he asked if the exercise had made you stronger or not. You would begrudgingly admit that it had, and then he’d tell you that you should just think of it as a win-win scenario and stop whining.

“Y/N!” That was how it always began: he would shout your name as he entered the classroom, usually accompanying it with a wad of paper or some other, similarly harmless object sent flying your way. You’d catch it in one hand and glare at him.

“What?” This would prompt him to explain his ridiculous plan for the day, after which he would turn to Ino and hand him his assignments. He had gotten special permission from the school to train you in this non-orthodox manner, given that you were so far ahead in any material that giving you homework would be redundant and a waste of time for all parties involved. For his part, Ino did not complain, for he had long ago lost interest in training with Gojo, who was admittedly terrible at actually explaining anything of note.

You made a good pair, you and Gojo, or at least as good of a pair as could be made given the circumstances. As the year went on, you grew more and more familiar with the reasoning behind his atypical style, and though you would never cease to complain, it was more lighthearted, a habit instead of a genuine gripe.

“You’ll be promoted any day now,” Gojo told you on the last day of your first year — the last day that he would be your director supervisor. “They’re waiting for you to grow a bit older, but it’s maturity you lack, not talent. If you participate in the Exchange Event next year, you’ll get the recommendations you need without a problem.”

“If?” you said, picking up on what he had left unsaid. “Isn’t it mandatory? Why wouldn’t I participate?”

“It’s mandatory if you’re living on campus, yes,” he said.

“And what cause would I have to not be living on campus?” you said.

“You’re interested in curse theory, aren’t you?” he said. When you nodded, he sighed. “Still? I was hoping you’d have moved on by now…well, I can get an alternate course of study approved for you by the principal, if you want.”

“An alternate course? What would that entail?” you said.

“One of my fellow special grade sorcerers, Yuki Tsukumo, specializes in researching the exact types of things you find so fascinating. If she agrees to it, then you could serve as an assistant of sorts to her. It’ll be like an internship or something. She won’t let you slack off — it’ll be much worse than anything I put you through, that’s for certain — but if that’s the path you want to take, then it’s an option,” he said.

You had never loved him quite as much as you did in that moment. Without even taking a moment to think about it, you nodded enthusiastically, beaming at him.

“Yes! Yes, Gojo, sir, that would be ideal. I’ve read some of the proposals Tsukumo’s submitted to the higher ups, and oh, if I got to work with her, it would be such a dream,” you said.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself,” he said. “She still has to agree to it.”

“Do you think she’ll say no?” you said.

“Maybe at first,” he said. “After she meets you, though? No way. You’re my pupil, after all. You’ll be the most impressive student she’s ever taken under her wing — and I can attest to the fact that you’ll be far and away the most dedicated.”

You supposed you had some things to thank him for, then. The corners of your lips twitched as you bowed your head at him, causing him to grunt in confusion; after all, you had never shown him such deference before.

“You’re not that bad as a teacher,” you said. “You know, for it being your first time, I think you did alright.”

“Yeah?” he said eagerly before composing himself, clearing his throat before speaking again. “Yeah, I guess you turned out just fine.”

“Thank you for everything, Gojo,” you said. “Please know that you’ll always have an ally in me.”

His black sunglasses slid down the bridge of his nose, just a bit, but enough that you could see the way his eyes softened ever so slightly. Then he reached out and socked you in the arm affectionately.

“Considering how often I butt heads with the higher ups, I might call upon you one day,” he said. “Don’t make that kind of promise lightly, is what I’m saying.”

“I’m not making it lightly,” you said. “If you call upon me, I’ll come. That’s what you do for someone who’s changed your life, right?”

Even the shades he had shoved back into position could not hide the breadth of his smile nor the depth of his fondness. He nodded, slowly at first and then quickly, like he wanted you to be very sure of his agreement.

“True,” he said, and then he patted you on the head. “Guess that means you can call on me whenever you want, too. I’ll be there.”

You smiled at him over your shoulder as you left for the summer and thought that you might never be so fortunate — or unfortunate — as to have a teacher quite like him again.

[moonlightdancer26]

"People only like Snape bc movies" I actually don't like the movies very much. They sanitize so much of the series.

I was that kid who took the books to point out how inaccurate the movies are. And while I've toned down things, I still don't care much for them. I watched them like, 20 times?

But the books-I was always reading the books. Since I was 8 or so. I brought them when I moved and they were the only thing to do besides TV. In the other time I moved I read the books. I was obsessed.

Snape's just interesting. And it's possible to like a character even though/because they did bad things. I like him because he shows trauma symptoms (please can I burn the trope of having characters go through traumatic things and then not reacting to it?). And I like him because his story is probably the only well done example of 'sometimes the good guys have bad traits and do bad and sometimes the bad guys have good traits'

And before anyone gets up on me-I love the Marauders too! Sirius is an interesting character. James (at least in fanfic) is funny. Remus is my favorite of them all.

And Snape was a lousy teacher. He had racist ideologies in the past. He's not a nice person. Don't make the accusation against me that I don't know my fave's flaws.

On a different note, it may be worth noting that Snape's Worst Memory was pretty much cut-just a few seconds, and no one's identity was shown. If it weren't for the books I doubt anyone would know that was the Marauders, and not just some random students.

I could make the same argument about Marauder fans. Wonder if people would've liked Sirius and Remus and James if SWM had been shown? I could make a whole list of things the Marauders did that wasn't shown in the movies. But it would be unfair to say that people only like the Marauders because of the movies. My Marauders-stan bestie certainly doesn't like the Marauders only because of the movies. And neither do you Moon.

Also: I don't get it. If you all want (mostly) unflawed blorbos the Golden Trio and the Silver Trio are right there. Babies, all of them. And Harry's other darling classmates too. Cho and the Patils.

Hundreds of languages out there and you decide to speak facts, anon.

Honestly that claim is so flawed for many reasons.

Literally every single character (except my beautiful bbygirl Ronald Bilius Weasley whose character was completely destroyed in the films and deserved sm better) in the movies was very simplified and at least a little bit whitewashed compared to their book counterpart. Even Umbridge was better in the movies than she was in the books, of course we can’t expect the filmmakers to shoehorn every single detail of Snape’s character in the films.

Be that as it may, a majority of Snape’s heroic actions were ALSO cut from the films. Did the films mention when Snape took the time to brew Wolfsbane potion perfectly each month for a man he didn’t even like? Did the films mention when Snape prepared the mandrake draught potion that cured three Petrified muggleborn students? Did the films mention when Snape revealed his dark mark in front of the Minister of Magic when he began questioning Dumbledore? Did the films mention when Snape went back to Voldemort in GoF and continued spying for Dumbledore? Did the films mention when Snape yelled at a portrait for referring to Hermione as a Mudblood? Did the films mention when Snape straight up saved Remus’s life in DH? Did the films mention when Snape rushed to the fifth floor in his pyjamas when he heard (the egg) screaming? Did the films mention when baby!Snape introduced Lily to the Wizarding World and told her everything she needed to know (including the Dementors; something Harry learned about when he was already a teenager)? Snape’s whole character in the movies (aka the one that stripped 80% of his personality) was done dirty. They didn’t manage to bring up some of his most heroic/genuine moments in the series, so antis better quit complaining about Snape “being whitewashed!!!!!!” in the movies, especially not when they’re Marauder stans as well (legit 89% of the bad things they did were barely even brushed upon).

Hearing people say “people who like Snape only watched the movies” is extremely amusing, especially when one remembers that… they’re talking about… one of the most best-selling book series in the entire world.

Book!Snape is far more diverse and complex than Movie!Snape can even dream to be. We see how his trauma affected him, how he grew as a person throughout the years, his relatively detailed backstory, his realistic bitterness regarding the son of the man he hated and the woman he loved, etc. Saying we can’t possibly appreciate his character is ludicrous, liking a fictional character doesn’t mean you believe they’re a flawless angel or even that you believe they’re a good person. People are able to enjoy problematic characters for what they are. Alan Rickman definitely did his best with what he was given, and movie!Snape was 100% iconic in his own dry way, but the filmmakers still did his character dirty.

My Marauders-stan bestie certainly doesn't like the Marauders only because of the movies. And neither do you Moon.

You’re right, anon. The reason I even like the Marauders (except Jimmy Jimmy coco puff) is because of how deep and complicated their characters are — as adults, we realise just how flawed and grey they are and that they aren’t as wonderful as how Harry views them.

Anyway, I decided to rant a little for you guys because I’ve been starving you for a while. Enjoy. <3

[aeoki]

Seven Bridges - Love and Peace?: Chapter 7

Location: Yumenosaki Infirmary Characters: Hitsugi & Jin

TL Note:

In Japanese culture, the nape/the back of the neck is considered an erogenous zone.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ< Almost an hour later. Yumenosaki infirmary. >

Jin: Sagami-sensei’s here~♪

I heard there’s been an emergency? Sorry for arriving late, Anzu.

If I were to make an excuse, I’d like to say that there’s a restaurant I’m a regular at that does cheap deals for alcohol at lunchtime on weekdays. It’s kinda my habit to go straight there and have a drink once my work is finished.

Stuff’s pretty strict near ES so there aren’t many places to drink there, you know? Yumenosaki’s also an educational institution, so I guess it’s basically the same there too.

That’s why I’ve gotta go pretty far out downtown. It’s a real hassle going to and fro like that.

Man, if only I could get a drink whenever I wanted.

I know you’re probably wanting to tell me I shouldn’t drink ‘cause teachers are role models, but I don’t give a crap. This is my right that’s acknowledged by the law.

………Hm?

Huh? Uh, Anzu… what’re you doing?

Hitsugi: …………

Jin: Oh hey, it’s “Nekuro”. What’re you doing there? Why is Anzu kneeling on the ground in forgiveness?

What’s going on between you guys? Though I guess I don’t have the right to question you guys.

You’re gonna be leading a tough life ahead if you’ve got such twisted fetishes from a young age – like getting happy over someone kneeling in front of you.

Hitsugi: …Oh! You were referring to me when you said “Nekuro”!?

Jin: You’re as slow as always – Who else is there?

Hitsugi: But I’m Kurone, not Nekuro!

Jin: Right. Yeah, “this you” doesn’t really know anything about that, huh.

Hitsugi: ……? ……?

I don’t really understand but I’m confused too. I was in the infirmary when I woke up and she’s been kneeling on the floor without saying a word for some reason.

Jin: So you weren’t the one who made her do that?

Hitsugi: I wouldn’t ever! But I guess I do feel a strange sort of excitement when I see the nape of the neck on a female[∗]!

Jin: Don’t. You’re just gonna be another pain in the neck for me if you also get twisted the wrong way.

Maybe it’s just because you’re broken fundamentally.

Hitsugi: ………?

Jin: Anyway. Then, is Anzu just kneeling on the ground because she wanted to? Why? Is she copying what Isara does? “Trickstar” didn’t teach you anything weird, did they?

Hmm? Nekuro– I guess I should be calling him Kurone, huh. Did you wipe him down ‘cause this guy was dirty from head to toe, Anzu?

Then you saw his naked body by accident? And that’s why you’re kneeling on the ground apologising?

Hmm… Otogari dug Kurone out and noticed he was using female pronouns, so you thought he was like Narukami?

That’s why they asked you to look after him – ‘cause you’re a girl. Otogari didn’t say enough so you misunderstood and thought Kurone was a girl?

Well, he’s got long hair and kinda looks like one.

Hitsugi: Not really!

Jin: You wanted to wipe his body down out of goodwill and ended up seeing the naked body of a young boy. Is that right, Anzu?

That’s just an accident – I don’t think you had to go that far to kneel on the ground in forgiveness. Is it against your religion to see the skin of the opposite sex or something?

Hitsugi: Yeah! Actually, I heard from my “big sister”, but I was apparently buried in the ground?

You saved me so you’re my saviour! If anything, I wouldn’t be able to complain even if I was killed!

Hm? You weren’t the one who saved me? It was someone called Adonis Otogari?

But even so, you were worried about me and wanted to wipe the dirt off me, right? Your goodwill made me very happy.

Ehehe~ I can’t really explain it that well ♪

Jin: Hey. I don’t particularly care but why were you buried in the ground? Is that some sort of metaphor?

Hitsugi: It’s not a metaphor – I was actually buried in the dirt!

Jin: Why? Go talk to a teacher if you’re being bullied.

Hitsugi: Am I being bullied…? Hmm?

I don’t really know but! It looks like the people from the “Peace Party” hate me? And maybe that’s why they attacked me!

Jin: The “Peace Party”?

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ← Previous Chapter ᠂ ⚘ ˚⊹˚ ⚘ ᠂  Next Chapter →

[sanriopinterest]

♡The Turmoil of the Beehive♡

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The floor collasped as my bed fell through. I rubbed my eyes as my pj's continued to slip off of me. "This is who I'm waking up too? Asshole!""I not gonna stop what I was doing so you only have yourself to blame for what you're about to smell, preacher douchebag". The other two girls complained. "Uhm, I was still sleeping dickhead" I deadpanned. "I'm gonna ignore that and keep talking". We sat kn the couch as garter went on with explaining a new mission or something.

   Stocking licking her ice cream so fast, some of it got in my braid and on my skin. Chuck then pulled out a little old man and got to talking about missing students and shit. "Alright you hookers! Go wash your asses in the sink and get to high school before that ghost swindles anymore students!" He screeched.

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(This is your outfit, in (f/c) of course)

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   See through crashed through the wall and a red carpet rolled out in front of us. "Are those celebrities?". Questions made its way through the crowd. "We're angels, dick" Panty said sliding on her glasses. "Uh, you do know what incognito means right? It's the opposite of that". We pranced through the halls as the cameras flashed. I pulled out a honey bun and began to eat. "Alright lets get this over with, where should we go first" I said opening the map of the school. Panty looked ahead and I followed seeing a ginge haired boy run down the hall with a beehive on his head. "What in the fuck? That's not suspicious or anything".

   Panty summoned her gun and shot at the dude, making the bees drop away. He slid across the floor and we looked down in digust. "Was that necessary?" Stocking asked. He looked up at us "Holy Mary Mother". "That all you got" Panty said kicking the beehive back onto his head. We laughed as he tan around in despair. "Oh briefer's darling" someone called out from the top of a huge cheerleader stack. "You're not really running around so carelessly with my precious beehive on your head now are you?" She said with a whole lot of venom in the last few words. "If looks could kill" I said throwing my wrapper. He started whimpering and apologizing to her. "So hey, what the fuck is that?" Panty looked up. "Ew, gross. Is that barbie wanna be I smell" The girl said re crossing her legs. She went on and on about her "I own the school" speech.

"You the janitor?" "Yeah, cause we meant the principal and he's hotter" Panty and Stocking threw to her face.

    "Well damn, she's actually kinda pretty" I said looking at her for a little. Panty and Stocking glared at me."My name's Barbie, you may also refer to me as;Queen Barbie, Her majesty, or Goddess. Allow them to demonstrate". The whole school went wild. Panty yawned"Your working way too"hard here. Did she seriously refer to herself as barbie, like the outdated fetish doll, with like a bazillion occupations""She did, and im allergic to plastic. Lets get out of here before we catch slut face" Panty and Stocking dragged her." Call me" I said throwing her my number as I got dragged away. As we exited Panty stepped on her beehive. All I heard was her ramblings and "The braided one is the most tolerable".

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   "Check this shit out guys, couldn't you just die? It even moves when you stick a finger up her""Third base panty, collect all four. Your just in this for the uniform" Stocking said not looking up from her sweets magazine."And your point?" Panty said wobbling around her figurine. The teacher then started passing out condoms for some strange reason." Don't put that in your mouth!" I warned Panty as she started eating the condom like it was gum. "Hey what are you girls doing?". Geek boy then whined to us about his 'friends' going missing.

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 He took us outside and decided to show us how is 'backpack' thing worked. "So what exactly were we taking when we decided to follow the ginger freak fro show" Stocking stated. "Good point" I said sipping on a slushie. "Sorry it usually works" Panty then suddenly kicked the 'proton pack'. "Proton pack of shit" she screamed. After she kicked it, it started vibrating and then blowed up. "Well isn't this a delight,

   I was afraid I would never see my favorite slut cankles ever again" a voice said from behind.

     Out popped barbie on top of a bunch of robots. "Ugh, aren't you supposed to be in the trash?""Ten inches is way to big for you""You never called me, kinda glad. I see my mistake". We all started a huge argument, in the middle of that empty field. She jumped off her pedestal and turned into a demon"Could this have been any more fucking predictable""Nope she's a queen, she's a bee, she's a queen bee, we fucking get it" Panty and Stocking whispered. We took out our weapons and the fight began. (Im not writing all of that srry).

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    As the gong sounded we knew she was defeated. A few coins fell from the sky and I got them. "Uh thats it cheap bastard's"

    Panty complained. "Here come the geeks" Stocking sang as they fell from the sky in cocoons.

    The ginger then went on to praise us about being ghost hunters. I snuck behind him and started to untie the geeks from their cocoons. "Hello smoregasm board! Who's fish should I play rocking chair with first""Oh I guess you've earned it""Line up, boys" Panty said sneaking away to the football players. "Hoe." I said kicking a nerd that tried to look up my skirt. "I need some sugar" Stocking said looking up to the sky.

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Words: 1061

Wattpad: @Vonlovesbread

-ℙ𝕒𝕟𝕚𝕔 🌊

[pillage-and-lute]

An Ever Fixed Mark (arranged marriage Au)

Part 1 is here, finally! Title a reference to Shakespeare’s Sonnet 116.

Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10

Read it on Ao3 HERE

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Vesemir’s slap hit Geralt firmly on the back of the head. Two seconds previously Geralt had been complaining about his upcoming, politically motivated marriage to some nobleman’s son. 

“It’s a good thing, lad. Other witcher schools would kill for something like this,” he said. Geralt knew it was right, legal punishment for those who shortchanged or attacked witchers. It set a precedent, and apparently the earl was very influential. It could change things.

“And there isn’t a fidelity clause,” Eskel said. “It doesn’t have to be more than a sort of partnership.”

“No consummation requirement either,” sniggered Lambert from the other side of the campfire. “You don’t even have to fuck the bugger if he’s ugly.” This earned him a sharp elbow from Eskel. 

“What I don’t understand is what they get out of this,” Geralt said. It had been bugging him. 

“Ah,” Vesemir said, looking uneasy. “It seems that the payment is...taking the viscount off of the Earl’s hands, officially. It seems he’s something of an embarrassment.”

The unease in Vesemir’s voice was subtle, but after so many decades with their teacher, the wolves of Kaer Morhen knew the slight variations of tone and expression. His discomfort was twofold, first, the obvious implication that the Earl was sending his son to live a dangerous life alongside a witcher in order to...deal with him. A death sentence, from father to son. The second was that Geralt, already saddled with a political marriage, was also to be saddled with a nuisance of a husband. 

“But why me?” Geralt knew he was whining like a child, but he couldn’t help it. It was three days to Lettenhove, and then they’d be there at least a week for the wedding and he’d have to act courtly. 

He wasn’t good at courtly.

When he thought about it none of them were. 

“It couldn’t have been me,” Eskel said, a little shyly. He was right. Eskel believed his scars were horrible, made him unlovable and undesirable. Geralt didn’t buy it, but nobles could get a bit stroppy about appearances. And if they humiliated Eskel because of his scarring...no, Geralt wouldn’t let that happen.

“Couldn’t have been me,” Lambert said, mouth full and rather cheerfully. No. It couldn’t have been him either, no manners and no filter, they’d be at war with the entirety of Lettenhove within a day.

“And I’m an old man,” Vesemir said. He didn’t actually wink, but he might as well have. Older though he was, he was still three times the warrior of any young human man walking about these days. But from what Geralt had heard, and it hadn’t been much, the Viscount was young, not quite twenty, and it wouldn’t be kind to marry him to someone so much older than himself. Geralt reflected grimly that he was nearly four times the youth’s age.

Three days of riding passed far too quickly for Geralt’s liking.

Chateau de Lettenhove loomed. It was a fairytale castle built by a man expecting a siege. There were high, rising towers with huge windows and artful buttresses, but to the trained eye of the witchers, it was a fortress. The towers had carved, decorative arrow slits, the windows all had iron grates over them, wrought like lace, and the buttresses could be easily used as defensive positions. All in all, it was a castle that growled, albeit genteelly.

They were greeted first by a footman, and then a line of servants increasing in rank, until a very snobby servant, likely the head housekeeper from the way all the maids scuttled away from her, brought them to an anteroom. At this point courtesy dictated that she bade them sit down on one of the lavish sofas. She did not. She chose instead to turn up her nose and sweep away.

The four witchers remained standing, not looking at one another. Geralt could feel Lambert stewing about the obvious slight beside him. He reached out, still staring straight ahead, and tweaked Lambert’s ear. 

This was about to result in much brotherly retribution and probably a brawl when the housekeeper returned, followed by another woman.

“His lordship the Earl of Lettenhove is attending to vital business,” the housekeeper said, tone of voice implying that the arrival of four witchers who were muddying her nice clean floor were certainly not vital. “I present, her ladyship, Countess Amaria Elizaveta de Lettenhove.” 

The countess curtsied, it was a polite little bob, and she smiled a little dazedly as the witchers all gave their best attempt at courtly bows. A small but significant part of Geralt’s brain was panicking, and it dealt with this new form of terror by imagining that the school of the wolf, seen from the outside plying their newly practiced bows, must look like a line of seagulls vying for a dropped crumb.

Vesemir stepped forward and, in a rather more suave gesture than Geralt had been expecting, took the Countess’ hand and bowed over it. Two bows seemed excessive to Geralt, but since it seemed to indicate that Vesemir would be taking over the speaking for now, he certainly wasn’t about to bring it up. 

“A pleasure to meet you, my lady,” Vesemir said, straightening and releasing her hand. “May I introduce the school of the wolf. Eskel is--”

The countess had waved a limp hand. “Plenty of time for that at the feast, deary,” she said, smiling dreamily. There was something in her eyes that was a little absent, possibly more than a little if her calling Vesemir ‘deary’ was anything to go by. Geralt looked the countess over. He had been given to understand through the brief letters from the Lettenhove estate, that this wasn’t the viscount-Julian, the letters said-’s mother, but rather his step mother. She was a petite lady with mousy hair and rather absent blue eyes. Her dress was obviously of very fine material, rose pink and probably silk, although Lambert would know better than him, but a simpler cut than Geralt had expected. 

His examination, done in a split second, decided that she wasn’t an immediate enemy, but probably not a terrible useful ally. 

“I’m to give you this courting gift,” here she proffered a small but beautifully carved wooden box. “And to show you to your quarters.” She smiled again, and it was warm, but still vapid.

“Custom usually dictates that the fiancé give the courting gift,” Vesemir said, cautiously taking the box.”

“My husband wanted someone else to present it,” she said. “But your grandson can give his gift in person when he meets Julian. Now what...” she trailed off, not even noticing Vesemir’s slight sputter at grandson. “Ah yes, your rooms, right this way please.”

She got lost on the way to their rooms and a shaking footman showed them up to a suite, then kindly took her by the hand and led her away.

They sat, silent, in the nice but not lavish quarters. Four beds in curtained alcoves off to the side, and in the middle a room with a table and chairs, and a sofa and more comfortable chairs in front of a fireplace. It was already blazing and the witchers stared into it for a minute.

“That was strange,” Eskel finally said, and the others just nodded.

“Should I have insisted on giving her our courting gift?” Geralt said after another pause. “I thought they were usually given in person.”

“I think you’re fine,” Vesemir said. “If they broke that tradition they can hardly fault you for doing the same.”

Lambert, sprawled across the sofa, said, “When’s dinner?”

“I think I’m supposed to meet Julian first,” Geralt said. “Someone will probably come get us. 

“When we meet Julian you mean,” Lambert said, sitting up. 

“No, I’ve been thinking about that and I want to meet him alone.”

Vesemir nodded, “Sensible, we don’t know how he will react to one witcher, let alone four.” Then he smirked, although not unkindly, at Lambert. “You will be introduced and have a chance to be nosy later. At dinner perhaps.”

They unpacked their belongings, potion bottles and swords looking out of place along the old but nicely carved furniture. After days of tension on the road as Geralt wound himself tighter and tighter with anxiety for his...wedding, yes his wedding, now this pause was jarring. Eskel tapped him on the shoulder and gave him a look.

Geralt turned around to give Eskel room to work.

On the Path, witchers are rarely, if ever touched. Certainly not in a friendly way if the other isn’t being compensated. It wasn’t therefore, unusual for the wolves of Kaer Morhen to be tactile with one another. Not hugging and cuddling sweetly, but rough housing and wrestling ending in exhausted dog piles. But Eskel had a gift, he had magic hands, literally and figuratively, and he carefully oiled his hands while Geralt took off his travel stained shirt. 

Geralt sunk into himself, half meditating as Eskel dragged the tension from his shoulders and beat the knots from his muscles. It wasn’t a relaxing massage, but it always left him feeling like liquid, if slightly bruised. When it was over and the liquid feeling had left him, or at least subsided enough that his knees could hold him, he stood, clapping Eskel on the shoulder in thanks.

Then came the hard bit.

Geralt needed to be courtly. He scrubbed the bits he could with water and a cloth from a little washstand, but he hoped he could have a hot bath later. Afterwards Vesemir advanced on him and battled the dirt from underneath his fingernails with a stiff brush before attacking his hair with a comb. Geralt sat on the ground like a child, his brothers looking on in amusement as Vesemir sat behind him on the couch and teased the tangles from his hair. He was making faces, he knew, but Vesemir wasn’t gentle, and he hadn’t detangled his hair in some time.

Scrubbed raw, with his hair floating around his shoulders like a silver cloud, Lambert presented him with a doublet. 

It was black, which was good.

That was the only good thing about it. It was most likely a very nice, extremely fashionable doublet. Lambert might take delight in embarrassing Geralt, but he didn’t mess about with clothing. The issue was that it was attention grabbing, it was subtle in a way that seemed to play itself down while actually drawing every eye. It was black, in the same way a raven’s wing was black, every shimmering shade shifting as the fabric moved.

And he would be wearing it. 

He did wear it. 

His hands shook as he buttoned it up. 

He was just examining himself in a slightly tarnished hand mirror when there was a sharp knock at the door. The footman let himself in right after and bowed swiftly. 

“I am to escort the witchers of Kaer Morhen to meet Lord Julian.”

“Just the one witcher,” Geralt said. Vesemir pressed his courting gift, and the little carved boxed nestled on top, into his arms.

The footman didn’t seem to care and simply turned away, leading Geralt through hallways that all looked the same and down two very winding staicases, the second of which was so narrow his shoulders actually brushed the walls. They stopped outside a plain wooden door. The footman bowed and smiled. It looked, Geralt couldn’t help but feel, rather cruel. Then he left. Geralt knocked softly on the door, feeling very large in the narrow, low ceilinged hallway.

Eskel had told him once of a myth he had read, about a beast, half man half bull, hidden away in a maze. Geralt felt like such a beast, too large and rough and probably going to barge in and do everything wrong.

“Come in.” 

It was soft, but not nervous, and Geralt pushed open the door. 

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Oooh I’m naughty for leaving it there, but it’s almost 2000 words already. @llamasdumpsterfire here it is at last, I hope it lives up to expectations.

[youngbloodlisk]

warnings: threesome, foursome, daddy kink, master kink, probably every standard sexual act you can think of (i honestly cant even remember what was and wasnt included and we love that), choking, petnames, sir kink, biting, some public stuff, rough smut, rlly rough smut lmao, degradation, i think thats it? but if i missed something im very sorry my brain is kind of a mushy submissive mess after reading this

omg i loved this shgdhdjdhdgh even as someone who doesnt love daddy/master and stuff as much as other people i very much enjoyed this thank you for submitting it omg

ok that was all lisa talking, here’s the actual dom!yoongi, dom!taehyung, dom!jungkook, sub!reader submission from @kpop-4-ever:

Taehyung. Taehyung. Taehyung. You banged your head in your hands frustratedly. At one point, you missed and banged your head on the desk. The teacher stopped speaking and everyone looked at you. “I’m okay…” She shrugged and went back to writing impossible math problems on the board. All but one of the students directed their attention back to the board. You sighed and winced when you got hit by a note. You opened it and smiled. Your dorm @4 and your bed is mine. Quickly, you threw a glance at your mint-haired friend who smirked at you. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at him. Luckily, you had homework so you wouldn’t fight over the bed.

Four rolled around quickly and you left your door unlocked. It wasn’t like your friend was going to knock anyways. “I’M HERE AND I BROUGHT A FRIEND.” “IN HERE.” You watched as he entered the room. “Hey, Yoongs!” He muttered a ‘hey’ and jumped on your bed. “My homework gives me more reaction than you.” “I’m here, too.” A small voice came from the doorway. “Chimmy!” Jimin was your childhood crush, but as all good things get older, they fade. That’s exactly what happened. Now you have a crush on the campus hot boy alien, Kim Taehyung. He was untouchable. Unreachable. He’s been on your mind since he gave you his umbrella and stood in the rain.

“Yoongles?” “Why do you hate me?” He sighed and groaned. “Cause I do. Now, did you pay attention in class?” You heard a slight chuckle. “I was zoned out but I know one thing. You were thinking of Taehyung.” He sneered. The closest soft thing was a plushie, so you decided to throw it at Yoongi. Jimin perked up. “I wanna talk about Tae.” “I don’t.” He forcefully turned your seat around and made you look at him. “We are talking about Taehyung.” “You looked like shit in class.” Of course, Yoongi noticed. No matter how much concealer you put on, he could tell. “I didn’t get good sleep last night.” “I can tell. These sheets smell clean, which means you washed them this morning.” True. You did. You hate washing your sheets so you do it once a month unless you have a reason to do it sooner.

"Okay, so I had a dream…” That was the truth… just not the full truth. “What kind of dream?” Yoongi smirked. “Obviously one about Taehyung, Jimin.” Sighing and blushing, you hid your head in your hands. “Ooh, was he choking you? Did he chain you up? Did he blindfold you? Did he make you call him daddy?” No. No. No. You absolutely did not want that image in your head right now, especially not in front of your friends. You bit back a moan and shuddered instead. “I don’t want to talk about it.” “He’s got you whipped.” Jimin giggled, playfully teasing you. You groaned. “Shut up, please!” Jimin looked taken aback. “Man, you need to get fucked and fast. You’re a bitch.” “I don’t need your criticism, Jimin. Or your advice.” At this point, the homework was forgotten until you turned around. Your phone buzzed violently.

ᗰᗩᗰᗩ ᒍIᑎ

Did you hear the news?

Did you?

Did you?

Answer me!

I cannot believe you don’t love your brother

What news?

Taehyung’s heading towards your house

What!?

I think it was something like he’s moving in next to you.

WHAT!?

*out of text*

“SERIOUSLY, HE DIDN'T THINK TO TELL ME THAT TAEHYUNG IS MOVING IN NEXT DOOR?” “Ooh, the tea is piping hot!” “Shut up, Jimin.” You groaned as someone knocked on the door. “Must be, Jinyoung.” The dorms were co-ed which was stupid, but you guess that the administration didn’t care if you got an STD, or worse, pregnant. Jinyoung hadn’t been home in weeks and you noticed his door was closed the entire time, but he was a private person so nothing was thought of it. You stood up and readjusted your shorts from riding up any farther. Thinking he could hear you, you started complaining to the door. “Jinyoung, you know that the key opens the door. Don’t tell me you lost it otherwise-“ You finally paid attention to who was at the door. Kim Taehyung. Jungkook was standing behind him with the second half of Taehyung’s stuff. “Hi! Are you going to let me in to my dorm, roomie?”

Subconsciously, you moved but you were still surprised. You didn’t think he’d be moving in with you. Where was he going to sleep? “Sit your stuff in the living room for now, please.” Slowly comprehending, you opened Jinyoung’s room to see it empty with a letter on the bed explaining that he was moving back home. That bitch left me, you thought. “In here.” Taehyung moved his stuff to the room and noticed the letter. “Jinyoung didn’t tell you did he?” Your head snapped to him confused. “Jinyoung recommended that I move in here. Said you were chill.” “You get settled in and I’m going back to my room.” He nodded and as soon as you shut your door you screamed. “FUCK!” Yoongi was sitting up, smirking at you and Jimin was giggling. “I think I’m going to leave…” “No you don’t.” You shoved Yoongi back on the bed and threw yourself in your chair.

A knock sounded on your bedroom door and Jimin opened it before you could react. Taehyung and Jungkook stood at the door. “YOU GOT AN XBOX ONE, PLAYSTATION, WII, AND TWO COMPUTERS FOR GAMING!” You giggled at Jungkook’s reaction. Typically, after school, you would come in here and play against people or just play for fun. “Is Jungkookie excited by my new roommate’s gaming system?” He nodded. “If you want, we can play sometime, Jungkook.” You could see him glowing with excitement. “I can come back if you want to be alone.” Taehyung eyed Jimin and Yoongi cautiously. His tone told you that he was thinking you were going to do something with Jimin and Yoongi. “It’s okay, they’re just friends.” “I’m not just your friend…” Jimin is not helping. “I’m your childhood best friend too!” “Go order takeout and make yourself useful.”

He stuck his tongue out at you before going to the living room to order. “What do you need?” “I was wondering if you’d help me do laundry?” Yoongi chuckled and gave you a look. That ‘this is the guy you want to fuck you’ look. “You don’t know how to do laundry?” He sheepishly grinned. “I mean, I do, but I don’t want to break another washer because it was different.” Jungkook chimed in much to the despair of his best friend. “Oh yeah! You broke the knob off and then fried the wiring.” Yoongi chuckled at you. Through gritted teeth, Taehyung spoke. “Yes, I was referring to that one.” Thankfully, Jimin came back into the room which saved Taehyung from complete embarrassment. Whatever, you thought. “Let’s go, it’s downstairs.” He nodded and grabbed his laundry. The two of you walked side by side in silence until you got to the laundry room. He watched closely as you showed him how to use the washer, eyes analyzing your every move.

———————————————————

On more than one occasion, you went with Taehyung to do his laundry, only staying in when you needed to study. This time was no different. The two of you had grown close, even going as far as you kissing him when you were flat out drunk from a party Jimin threw. “Why do you wash your clothes so much? Do you like me or something?” “Or something,” he responded, not paying attention to you drooling over him. His shirt stayed taut in all the right places. You watched as he tossed his clothes in the washer and started it. Growing bored as the time passed, you hopped up on the dryer and dangled your legs off the side. Keeping up with the conversation, you moved your legs as Taehyung transferred his clothes to the dryer and turned it on. Bad idea to sit on the dryer. You lurched forward as it vibrated beneath you, grazing your clit. You moaned softly and then blushed after realizing what happened.

“I-I have to go.” You were too embarrassed to stay and deal with the fact that your hot roommate heard you get turned on by a dryer. “Stay.” Taehyung’s voice was dominant and turned you on even more. Your juices were slowly soaking through to your shorts. Luckily, you were wearing black so it didn’t show, but at least you were in a place where you could wash your clothes. “Did that turn you on?” You shook your head. “Answer me, baby doll.” A small whimper left your lips when he forced his leg in between yours. “Yes, Daddy.” Daddy. Taehyung just realized that he had a Daddy kink. “Fuck, that was hot.” He watched as your face turned pink and looked away from him. This was not acceptable in his book. His hand gripped your chin and forced you to look at him. You looked into his lust-filled eyes and gulped as he leaned in closer, lips brushing yours. The need controlled your movements as you pulled him into a heated kiss. It was a mess of moans and tongues as you submitted to Taehyung.

Pulling away to catch your breath, Taehyung nipped and sucked at the soft skin of your neck, leaving marks. “We can’t do this here. There are cameras.” He nipped harshly at a sweet spot, causing you to moan. “Let them watch.” Forcing yourself not to succumb to his wants, you pushed him away. “We’ll get kicked out.” You jumped down only to be pushed against the wall. Taehyung grinded himself against you, the pleasure making you throw your head back. “Tae,” your voice was barely a whimper now. “You can’t leave me hanging babydoll, now can you?” “No Daddy but-“ He effectively cut you off by thrusting his long, slender fingers in your mouth, making you gag at the sudden intrusion. Drool spilled out of the corner of your mouth, making you feel absolutely filthy. If one were to walk into the laundry room, they’d know exactly what was going down or more who was going down.

Footsteps sounded in the hallway, nearing closer to the laundry room. “Stay quiet, babydoll and they won’t know a thing. You can do that for me, right?” “Yes, Daddy,” you sighed. “Good girl.” Taehyung removed his fingers from your mouth and wiped them on his sweatpants. “Hey, Taehyung. ________.” You managed to squeak out a small hi to your classmate, but Taehyung’s wandering hands didn’t help either. When she looked away to grab clothes, Taehyung’s large hand groped your breast, pinching your sensitive nipple through the shirt. “Shit,” you gasped. “Are you okay?” You looked up to see the girl staring at you worried. “Yeah, just had a cold chill.” It wasn’t a total lie, but it was believable enough for her to return to her laundry. “Who knew my baby doll had a little mouth on her?” Taehyung whispered into your ear, sending shivers down your spine. “What else can that pretty mouth say?” “Wait until we get back to the dorm to do anything,” you hissed, scared of getting caught but loving the thrill. “Tsk. Are you disrespecting me? Do I need to punish you?”

The thought of what Taehyung could do to you made you even wetter. Your juices threatened to escape your shorts and show him how much that affected you but there was no need. His fingers slipped into your shorts and ran across your clit forcing you to bite your lip to keep quiet. “Hey, you look sick. Are you okay?” You looked up to find the girl staring at you and suddenly, you were all too aware of Taehyung’s fingers threatening to push into you in a public area. “Yeah, it’s just hot in here.” “It is a little, but will you be kind enough to watch my clothes? I have to study and I don’t want someone to set them on top again in the middle of the wash.” A quick nod made her smile, and leave the room. “Babydoll, I think you have a voyeurism kink.” A smirk was etched on his face as you turned to him, wide-eyed. “And I think I know just how to satiate that. Would you like me to call Jungkookie? Or how about Yoongi hyung, hmm? How would you like to have your best friend watch you get ruined?”

“You don’t even need to talk, your body is talking for you,” he purred into your ear. You whined when he slipped his hands out of your shorts and tapped your lips. “Open up, babydoll.” Maybe you could get some retribution for his teasing. The lewd sucking sounds from you made Taehyung groan out loud. He pulled his fingers out and dried them on his sweatpants before turning to the dryer. “I think the dryer’s done.” Your mouth hung open as he completely ignored the fact that he had just been toying with you, making you a mess. Taehyung grabbed his phone and pulled up his contacts before calling someone. “I’ll be right back,” he said heading out to the hallway. Dumbfounded, you stood in place trying to figure out what just happened. Sexually frustrated, you squeezed your thighs together, hoping that your classmate would come to get her clothes so you could go home and fix your own problems. Fuck Taehyung. Fuck him and his effect on you.

“Hey, thank you! I owe you a favor.” You came back down to earth to see the second person you wanted to see the most. “Oh, it’s no biggie.” Exhaling heavily, you grabbed Taehyung’s clothes from the dryer, put them in his basket, and walked out to where he stood, still on his phone. He grunted when you shoved the basket into his chest before stomping back to the apartment, clearly struggling to keep your cool. Behind you, you heard Taehyung chuckle. “Okay, see you soon. Bye.” Was he really going to leave you like this? Almost immediately, you shut your bedroom door. You threw yourself face down on your bed, screaming. You turned over and stared at the ceiling, thinking about how it would feel to have Taehyung’s long fingers reaching lengths that your own couldn’t. Just the thought itself made your hands crawl down to the place that needed the most attention. You wasted no time slipping your fingers in between your folds, collecting the slick that was now dripping down onto the back of your shorts.

With ease, you pushed in one finger, your back arching at the pleasure. “Fuck,” you moaned out, now thrusting your fingers in and out. Moans spilled from your mouth as you edged closer to your high. Your door creaked open and you heard a tsk. “Babydoll, you couldn’t wait for me?” “You were busy on the phone,” you spat. “Being a little brat, are we? I think I can fix that.” Taehyung grabbed the silk tie from your robe hanging on the door and crawled onto your bed. “Hands.” “No, I’m so close,” you whimpered. He ignored your pleading as his large hands wrapped around your wrists, forcing them up towards the bed frame. “You don’t want to listen, then you don’t get to cum, baby doll. Fine. By. Me.” You tugged at the silk that restricted you to the bed. “Tae,” you whined out, earning a glare. “What did you just call me?” He asked darkly. “I’m sorry, Daddy.” His dark eyes disappeared when he smiled, causing you to internally scream at the fact that he could look so sexy one minute, but the next minute so cute.

“I brought you a gift!” Taehyung exclaimed, excitedly. Confused, you watched as he opened the door to reveal your best friend, leaning against your door frame. “Y-Yoongi, what are you doing here?” “No speaking without permission, Babydoll.” Yoongi strolled in and sat down in your desk chair, spreading his legs while exerting dominance. “Daddy, what are you doing?” “Kitten, I believe he told you not to talk without permission.” You gulped and watched as Taehyung stalked you like his prey. “Hmm, I bet you taste sweet.” Your hips rutted into the air as Taehyung dragged his fingers up your leg, over the spot you wanted them most, over your chest, and to your cheeks where he harshly squeezed them and forced you to look at him. “I want you to be a good girl for me. Or else.” Without warning, Taehyung ripped your shirt, exposing the dark red bra that you were thankful you had put on before going to the laundry room. “We won’t be needing this,” he said before reaching underneath you and unclasping your bra in one swift motion.

As the garment was thrown across the room, Taehyung was working at your perked nipples. You gasped as he pinched and twisted the sensitive bud. A low chuckle escaped from his lips as he took the other in his mouth, using his tongue to stimulate you. “Fuck,” you whined. Taehyung pulled back and removed his hands. “I’m pretty sure Taehyung made himself clear, Kitten,” Yoongi stated. You looked up at Taehyung as if asking for permission to talk. “You may speak, babydoll.” “I’m sorry, Daddy. Tell me what to do and I’ll do it. Just touch me please,” you said desperately, already having been denied an orgasm once. “I think you should ask Yoongi hyung what he thinks.” “Yoongi-“ He held up his hand to quiet you. “If you want to get anywhere with me, then you should call me master.” “Master, I’ll do anything, I just want someone to touch me. Please.” You saw a small smirk appear on his face as you spoke. “Taehyung, I think Kitten wants you to taste her.” “With pleasure.”

Taehyung tapped your thigh to signal for you to lift your hips so he could take off your shorts. “Babydoll, you're soaked. Is it because of Daddy or maybe it’s caused by your master?” You took your lip in between your teeth to stop the noises threatening to release themselves. A loud moan forced its way out of your mouth as Taehyung licked a stripe up your folds. “How does she taste?” “So good.” Just as quick as he spoke, he was already diving back in, devouring you like a starved man. You let out a broken sob at the euphoric feeling. If your hands weren’t tied, they’d be tangled up in Taehyung’s messy hair. Instead, you let your thighs tighten around his head. “Kitten, you're gonna suffocate him.” The male in between your legs let out a groan when he realized Yoongi’s words affected you. “Use your fingers, Taehyung.” Complying to Yoongi’s command, Taehyung slipped a finger into you, moving it at a fast pace. “Don’t be a pussy, add more. She can take it.” “Master-“ Your words were cut off by the male adding two more fingers. You felt your high approaching and so did Taehyung. Right before you came, he pulled away, letting your orgasm fade.

“You didn’t think I’d actually let you come so soon, did you, babydoll? You’ve been a bad girl.” You stared at him, tears spilling out of your eyes from being so close. “Don’t look so sad, Kitten. We’re just getting started.” Taehyung crawled off the bed and stripped off his shirt and pants, leaving himself in his underwear. Your eyes widened at the sight of Taehyung’s bulge straining against his boxers. You happily sighed as he took them off, letting his dick stand tall and proud. “Like what you see?” Taehyung asked cockily. “I know for a fact that Yoongi’s bigger.” He let out a growl, sounding almost animalistic as Yoongi chuckled from the side. “Well, she’s not wrong.” “It doesn’t matter the size, as long as you fuck your bitch right.” The bed dipped as he untied the silk from the bed frame. He pulled you towards him, seeing as how your wrists were still tied together. “And tonight, along with every other night, you are my bitch.” His lips crashed against yours in a messy make out. You fought for dominance but ultimately lost. Taehyung pulled away for air and readjusted you so you were on his lap. Even though he was dominating you, he still wanted to make sure you were ready for him.

“Are you ready?” The sincerity in his voice was sweet but you were too far gone to care. “Take me, daddy. Make me your bitch.” You whispered the last word into his ear before nibbling at it, making him groan. Taehyung lifted you up and helped you ease onto his dick. He let out a guttural groan as he bottomed out. “Move for me, babydoll.” Using his chest as leverage, you brought your body up before slamming it back down, repeating the process. Eventually, you started to slow down, becoming worn out from doing all the work. Taehyung gladly took control, flipping you over and pounding you deep into the mattress, making you moan out loud. You glanced over at Yoongi, who was watching the entire show with a cocky smirk plastered on his face. A sharp gasp left your lips as Taehyung found that ‘special’ spot. “YOONGI,” you screamed out in pleasure, making Taehyung wrap his hands around your throat and lean down towards you. He chuckled deeply into your ear. “Oh babydoll, you’re in for a long night.”

You became frustrated when Taehyung pulled out once again, making you cry out. “Daddy. Please let me cum just once.” He pretended to think about it before shaking his head. “I think you’ve been a good girl but I’m not letting you cum. He might though.” You froze and looked to where Taehyung was pointing. Jungkook stood dumbfounded in the doorway, watching your naked body shudder under his gaze. Yoongi pulled up the other chair and patted it, signaling Jungkook to sit down. You watched as he shifted in his chair, trying to ignore the raging hard-on he was sporting. “Looks like Jungkookie has a little problem. Why don’t you let him use you? Maybe he’ll let you cum.” Jungkook visibly gulped as Taehyung stepped away and gave him permission to come up to you. “C-Can I?” He asked, reaching out for your hand. “Yes, sir.” His eyes darkened at the two little words that held a monumental effect on him. Jungkook carefully took your hand in his, wanting to be a little more on the sweet side.

“She’s not porcelain, she won’t break,” Taehyung scoffed. “Trust me, I know.” He added, throwing you a smirk. “You’re right, I didn’t break. Maybe you just didn’t fuck me hard enough.” Sure you were gonna die, but it would be worth it. “Bitch-“ Jungkook turned and stood face to face with Taehyung. “You said it was my turn, therefore; it’s my turn. Clearly, you didn’t impress her.” Taehyung backed up, astonished that his friend just spoke back to him. Jungkook returned to his spot beside you and untied your wrists. “No need for this.” You sighed and rolled your wrists, happy that there wasn’t something restraining them anymore. “Thank you, sir.” “On your knees.” Gladly, you dropped down on your knees in front of him. His hands fumbled to get the belt on his jeans undone, but once he got it off everything else was easy. “I want you to put that pretty mouth to use. You said you don’t have a gag reflex and I’m here to test that, Princess.”

Once his dick was free from its confinement, you set to work, smearing his precum along his length. He let out an almost pornographic moan when you kitten licked his tip. “Don’t tease.” Not wanting to make him wait any longer, you opened your mouth and fit as much as you could at one time. “Good girl,” Jungkook groaned, his fingers tangling into your hair and pushing you further down, enjoying the feeling of your tongue swirling around his dick. You hollowed your cheeks and began to suck on his length softly. He bucked his hips harshly when he felt you swallow the drool threatening to spill out of the corners of your mouth. “I can’t hold back, Princess.” You tapped his thigh signaling to let go of his restraint and just fuck your mouth until your throat is raw. Jungkook happily did so, thrusting roughly to the point where your nose reached the skin at the base of his dick. “You weren’t lying, babydoll. You really don’t have a gag reflex.” Feeling proud of your little feat, you sucked harshly making Jungkook’s head fall back in pleasure. Somewhere in there, you swore you heard Yoongi mumble, “fuck, that’s hot,” under his breath.

“I’m cumming, Princess.” You felt him pull out of your mouth and use his hand to get his release. “Open your mouth,” Jungkook commanded. Just the sheer tone of his voice made you eagerly stick out your tongue awaiting his next move. He moaned as he came, his release staying mainly on your tongue but escaping to your chin and down to your chest. “Look at the little cum slut so eager to please,” Yoongi chuckled, his thumb coming to wipe the excess off your chin and bringing it to your mouth. “Open up, Princess.” You took Yoongi’s thumb in your mouth and sucked, trying to make his facade break. “You can show me what that little mouth of yours can do later. Right now, it’s Jungkook’s turn, Kitten.” Listening to Yoongi, you turned to see Jungkook already shirtless and working on his skinny jeans. You gawked at his muscles, admiring how well built he was. “Shit,” you whispered under your breath, imagining Jungkook fucking you up against your bedroom wall. His strong arms holding you up while his hips thrust into you at an inhuman pace.

“Tell me what’s on your mind, Princess.” Back in reality, Jungkook was already stripped and standing in front of you. “Nothing, sir.” “Now don’t lie or you won’t get what you want.” You gulped nervously and spoke. “I was thinking about you f-fucking me against the wall.” Your voice was hushed and raw but Jungkook still smirked, hearing you clearly. “Your wish is my command.” Before you could speak, his hands were already helping you to your feet. He pulled you into a kiss that started out soft, his teeth occasionally nibbling at your bottom lip. “Jump.” As soon as your legs wrapped around his body, the kiss became rougher and needier. Your hands tangled into his hair, and your back hit the cold wall, making you whine. With his strength, he gingerly slid you onto his length. The sound of his skillful hips slapping against your skin soon filled the room as Jungkook set to work on covering your neck in his marks. You moaned when he found your sweet spot. “Found it,” he said with a small chuckle. He continued his assault on your neck, enjoying the sinful sounds you made dangerously close to his ear.

“Sir, I’m going to cum,” you whispered in between marking his neck. “Cum for me, Princess.” Unable to hold back any longer, you bit down onto Jungkook’s neck as you came, your moans being muffled. Jungkook wasn’t expecting you to have a biting kink but it had him pulling out and cumming in seconds. “I wasn’t expecting that,” he worded breathlessly. Your head laid on his shoulders, tired and worn out. Jungkook laid you onto the bed and watched as you started to drift off, chuckling because they were not done with you. Sleep was only an inch away when you were jolted awake by a tongue against your sensitive clit. You looked down to see Yoongi lazily eating you out, taking his time and ruining any chance of you getting any energy back. “Yoongi,” you whimpered out, earning a small bite on your thigh. “Master, please. I can’t take it. It hurts.” He pulled his head up to look at you with dangerous eyes. “Keep complaining and I’ll make sure you can’t walk tomorrow.” You threw your head back in defeat as Yoongi continued his assault. After a minute or two, he decided to add one of his fingers, pushing it in slowly. Instinctively, your hips bucked into his fingers to get more friction. Your own fingers were tangled in his hair, pulling when his fingers pushed in.

It was so dirty and filthy the way you were enjoying how your best friend was making you feel. The way his tongue skillfully danced across your clit. The way the sucking and nibbling made you cry out in pleasure. “Did I say you could make noise?” “No but-“Yoongi looked up at you with a dark, piercing gaze. “Make one more sound, and I’ll punish you.” You almost whimpered at the sound of his harsh tone, but you held it back and nodded your head. “Good girl.” While Yoongi was teasing you, you tried your hardest to not make a sound, biting your lip so hard it almost started to bleed. His lips traveled up your body, placing light, feathery kisses along with marks that would take weeks to disappear. He crashed his lips against yours in a messy make out and you were careful not to make noise. Your hips moved along with his fingers at a fast pace, making the whole scene feel heavenly. Everyone else in the room became non-existent as Yoongi kissed you roughly, sending bolts down to your core. Even as you were making out with him, you still fought the urge to make noise. Yoongi pulled away from the kiss. “Struggling much, kitten?”

With all your strength, you reached up and crashed your lips against his again to stop the whine threatening to slip from your lips. You were so caught up in kissing him, that you didn’t feel his fingers run through your hair. Yoongi waited a few seconds before tugging your hair harshly. A cry escaped your lips as you grabbed the sheets, crumpling up the once pristine purple sheets. Your eyes widened at the realization of what you had just done, broken his only rule. “Master, please. I didn’t mean to.” The pleads of forgiveness slipped out in a broken voice. Yoongi chuckles darkly. “I had one rule, kitten. And you couldn’t even follow it. I’m disappointed. I didn’t want to have to punish you.” “Please. I’ve been a good girl. Don’t do this,” you whined, feeling his fingers work your orgasm closer. Noticing the way you clenched heavily around his fingers, he pulled them out of you. “You sound cute when you beg, kitten. I can’t wait to make you beg me to stop. If you take your punishment like the good girl I know you are, I’ll fuck you until you’re crying. Okay?” You nodded desperately. “Good. You didn’t have much of a choice in the matter.”

“On your knees, slut. I’m going to fuck your throat raw,” Yoongi commanded. While you got on your knees and awaited your fate, Yoongi undressed himself. He walked to where you were kneeling for him. You were too busy looking at the floor to notice him, so he yanked your hair to make you look at him. “Now that I have your attention, you ready?” You took a deep breath before nodding at him. He released your hair, but only for a minute. He pulled your hair into a makeshift ponytail as he thrust into your mouth. Yoongi chuckled as drool dribbled out of your mouth and down your chin. His low groans were music to your ears. As he grew closer to his release, his pace got rougher and sloppier. Right before he came, he pulled out of your mouth, breathing heavily. “Master, you didn’t cum,” you forced out, your words not fully forming because of your raw throat. “Listen to that. Babydoll can’t speak properly.” Yoongi threw a smirk towards the two other boys in the room as if saying ‘I did this and you didn’t’. “I don’t want to cum yet because you are going to take it like the little cumslut you are. And you’ll enjoy every minute of it whether you like it or not.”

You mentally smiled, knowing that even though Yoongi was treating you like a slut, he would stop if need be. “Bed. Now.” You immediately stood up and went to the bed, complying to Yoongi’s command. “Face down, ass up,” he enunciated each word, forcing you to do the action by pressing his hand in the middle of your back and pushing down so your back was arched. The bed dipped as he climbed up behind you and prepared himself. The stretch was a little different from Jungkook’s and Taehyung’s dicks. It was slightly longer than Jungkook’s but less girthier and Taehyung just couldn’t compare. Taehyung’s length was a bit shorter and less girthier than both men. It was perfect for a causal sex but right now, you wanted to be fucked, destroyed, not able to walk tomorrow. The sound of Yoongi placing harsh smacks on your ass while pounding you face first into the mattress was a sight for the others. Jungkook had gotten his phone out and started to record while Taehyung had grabbed his camera from the other room and took pictures of your fucked out expressions to add to his new keepsake box.

“Let the neighbours hear how good I make you feel, kitten,” Yoongi growled out, focusing on the feeling of you clenching around him. A loud, pornographic moan erupted from your lips, eliciting a smirk from Yoongi. He groaned when he looked at where your cunt was swallowing his dick, pulling it in with a vice-like grip. A word slipped past your mouth, making Yoongi chuckle. “Are you sure you’re ready for me to go faster, kitten?” You tapped the bed, signaling yes as your confirmation words were swallowed into the mattress. Your face went even further into the mattress… if that was even possible. Yoongi thrusted into you at an almost animalistic pace, making you scream into the sheets. “Maybe you should fuck the bitch more often if she screams that loud for you,” Taehyung said, his voice deeper than usual. “Maybe I should. It’s not like you could anyways.” Taehyung clenched his jaw, but opted to not say anything. “Are you going cum all over my dick for me, Kitten?” Knowing you couldn't answer, Yoongi continued to thrust into you harshly, edging you closer to your limit. “Yoongi,” you yelled out as he continued his relentless pace through your orgasm, immediately overstimulating you.

“I’m not stopping until I cum, little brat.” He flipped you over onto your back and repositioned you so that your leg was on his shoulder and the other was against your chest. Tears spilled from your eyes as he ignored your pleas. His hips stuttered as he came inside of you, thrusting a little more to milk himself of every last drop before he fell beside you. “I did too much work,” he huffed out. “Pfft. A good fuck goes all night. A mediocre fuck goes one round,” Taehyung teased, riling up the mint haired boy. “I never said I couldn’t go more rounds, I just said I’m done doing the work.” While the two bickered back and forth, Jungkook was already making his way over to you, wheeling in the chair. With the last bit of strength you had, you climbed into his lap. “How are you feeling, princess?” He asked sweetly. You laid your head on his shoulder, tired. “Sore and tired,” you sighed out, placing a soft kiss on his neck. Jungkook placed a kiss to your forehead and allowed you to rest for a minute or two. “Don’t go to sleep yet. We aren’t finished with you,” he said softly but yet something about it was hot. Discreetly, his hands moved your bottom half against his growing problem. “Sir, please. Five more minutes.” Jungkook sighed sharply. “But I need to be in you.” You lifted yourself up and allowed Jungkook to slip his dick into your sensitive heat.

“Don’t move.” While he didn’t enjoy orders from you, he did enjoy the warmth of your tight walls around his length. Caught up in the passion and slowness of the moment, you kissed Jungkook. You kissed him slowly and passionately, not rough like you did when he was taking you against the wall. His hands laid upon your waist, holding you close. Your arms were wrapped around the back of his neck as you continued your soft make out session. You were so into the kiss that you didn’t realize a few things. A)Jungkook had started moving, going against your instructions, B) Yoongi was watching what was going on, and C) Taehyung was now behind you, trailing his fingers up your body as he sucked marks on your neck and shoulder bone. Feeling Taehyung behind you, sucking and biting at your neck made you kiss Jungkook with a little bit more rush. “Let’s turn you around, babydoll.” Careful, not to move too much, you turned around and came face to face with two dicks. “We’ll give Jungkook the pleasure of finishing off in you last, but I want your mouth, babydoll. Let me see what had the others coming so fast.”

Yoongi looked at you expectantly, clearly not wanting to be left to help himself. Your hand wrapped around his dick and began to pump his length. Taehyung on the other hand, had tapped your lips with his fingers making you open up. He slid his dick in easily and you hollowed your cheeks before bobbing your mouth up and down. Jungkook, noticing that you were preoccupied, took matters into his own hands by bucking his hips up into you causing you to moan around Taehyung. The vibrations against his length made Taehyung groan out and you were pretty sure the neighbours could hear and knew exactly what was going on. “I’m taking over, okay Babydoll?” You looked up at him through your blown out eyes and nodded. His long fingers grabbed ahold of your hair and the back of your head pushing you down to meet his thrust. He did this a couple of times to test the waters before picking up the speed almost making you gag at times. The hand that was working Yoongi stuttered as you tried to focus on the two things that were fucking into you and he quickly lost patience, taking matters into his own hands (metaphorically).

Yoongi started fucking into your hand at the same pace as Taehyung, imagining that it was your skillful tongue working him and not a measly hand. Your knees quickly grew painful at the hard cracked leather scraping and scratching at them but you pushed through. In your bliss, you looked up and saw Taehyung become a groaning mess as he felt his high near. His face was contorted with pleasure as his hands grabbed whatever was nearest to him which happened to be your desk. Yoongi was close by, moaning out your name as you struggled to keep your hand shaped for him. Jungkook wasn’t far behind as he had been edging himself during the time Yoongi was fucking the life out of you. You weren’t as close as the others and you were counting on one of them to help you. “I’m coming, babydoll,” Taehyung choked out. You swallowed the drool that had form in your mouth around him to make room for the next thing. His large hand pushed your head down all the way and released down your throat effectively making you gag. He pulled away, exhausted and went to grab some lotion and towels.

You felt Yoongi’s thumb grab up the excess cum from your mouth and wiped it on your bottom lip. You were going to lick it off to tease him but Jungkook hit just right and had your head falling back against his shoulder. “Sir, more please.” “Yoongi is finished yet.” A whine fell from your lips but you set to work making your hand meet Yoongi’s thrusts. You leaned down to where his dick poked through and kitten licked the tip each time it came through. “Shit. Keep doing that and I won’t be able to hold back.” A few more thrusts or so of doing that and he was cumming. Bits of it were all over your neck and face and some landed on your breasts. The entire picture was lewd. Before Yoongi could get affected by the scene again, he rushed to get the bath running. “It’s just you and me, princess.” With ease, Jungkook went faster while you slammed your hips down to meet his. “Jungkookie, I’m cumming!” “Cum for me, Princess.” He had neared his high right as you had and you both came at the same time. You shut your eyes, tired, sore and hungry. A scream came from the doorway.

“What the fuck?” The new voice had Taehyung and Yoongi running, only Yoongi had the decency to wear a towel around his waist. “YOONGI? Oh my god! I’ll come back later. Have fun.” “Jimin-ah.” Yoongi called him, effectively making the boy turn and stare. “Tell anyone about this and I’ll break you.” Jimin smiled sheepishly knowing he would die if he didn’t listen. “I believe you. I mean, you already broke our best friend. Wait, is she still your best friend or….” “Go wait in the living room.” You gave a weak smile as you heard Jimin laugh down the hallway, running from Yoongi. “Let’s get you two in the bath.” The voice wasn’t registering in your head but you felt yourself being lifted up and placed in the hot bath. Not long after, you felt another body enter the tub. “Come cuddle me, Princess.” “No, we are washing you guys up.” You felt hands placing soap in your hair, washing it before moving onto your body. “She’s tired, Taehyung.” “We all fucked her pretty good.” “Correction, I did.” “Shut up Kook.” “You, Tae.” You chuckled at the boys and let whoever was washing you, continue. “Come on, up you go.” It was Yoongi washing you with such gentleness. He wrapped a towel around you as soon as he helped you stand up. “Let’s go get you some clothes,” he spoke softly which was a nice change from all the times before.

You walked out to the living room in Jungkook's shirt and a pair of loose shorts and nothing else. With the help of the walls, you walked out to Jimin and sat beside him. “One of the boys couldn’t have helped you out here?” “I could do it myself, I’m a big girl,” you said weakly. “Yes you are. So tell me….” You looked at him expectantly, not knowing what was going to be said. “How were they? Especially Yoongi! Was he as big and good as he claimed to be?” The way Jimin threw question after question and cutely stared at you waiting for the answers made you laugh. “They were good and Yoongi is way better and bigger than what he said he was.” The two of you got lost in conversation when the other three came out to sit on the couch and chairs. “I hear you talking good things about Yoongi and Jungkook but what about me?” “You were okay,” you teased Taehyung who pouted. Still hazy from the sex, you leaned over and kissed him. “Did you just kiss me?” “Was I not allowed to?” You question, curious as to why not right now, just minutes after they were all kissing and making out with you. “What are we?” Jungkook asked. “Whatever you guys want to be,” you shrugged, down with being in a relationship or a friends with benefits situation or even just friends and this never happened. The room was silent with people thinking of what to call this.

Yoongi spoke up first. “I’m okay with all of us being in a relationship.” “You’re suggesting polyamory?” You asked, watching his head nod. “I’m down!” All four heads turned to look at the enthusiastic Jungkook already eyeing you. “All you guys need is Taehyung,” Jimin pointed out. “Yeah, I’m good with it. I have more chances to prove myself now.” You threw the pillow at Taehyung and laughed when it hit his head. “Shut up.” “How about no?” “Wait, so this means that I can do couply things with you guys and kiss you and be alone with you?” Yoongi nodded. “Yeah but don’t kiss me in public. Don’t need Jimin getting jealous.” “Yah! I’m not jealous. You’re mediocre at best, hyung.” You smacked Jimin’s chest making him wince. “Don’t say anything you don’t know.” “Oh yeah, I forgot. You’re an expert on Yoongi now,” he joked, sticking his tongue out at you. “I am. And I am an expert on Taehyung and Jungkook. Got a problem?” “No. You aren’t an expert on me so we are good.” You painfully crossed your arms standing your ground. “Oh yeah? Should I tell them about the 3 am Dream calls where you interrupt my sleep talking about your sex dreams?” Jimin’s eyes went wide. “No, I’m sorry. I’ll go order Chinese as a sorry.” The four of you laughed as you watched Jimin scurry off to order food. “Hey, princess?” You turned towards Jungkook only to be met by a quick kiss. “Meanie.”

------

here ya go :) (i'm suffering)

[uswnt-keeper]

Focus Isn’t My Strong Suit

Prompt by @cpaeralricey: Can you do a Kelley x youngersister!reader quarantining together and the reader has to to do School online but struggles cause of their ADHD and just lots of fluff and Kelley helping the crazy kid out. Does that make any sense? If not don’t worry about it.

Note before we start. Sorry if this is terrible, I don’t have ADHD so I don’t really know what it’s like, I tried to make this is fun as possible. Also just for future reference I will no longer be writing Kelley, Alex, or JJ fics. (There will be my final Alex post today, but that’s it).

This royally sucked... like to a whole other level of sucking... does that sound weird? It sounds weird, oh well... whatever. That’s not the point, the point is, I’m stuck doing online school, which normally isn’t that bad, but it all kind of happened all at once.

You see, I’d been flown out to visit Kelley, my older sister, in my spring break which happened to be at the beginning of March. I hadn’t seen her in a long time between her traveling for different teams, and I missed her. I miss all of my siblings honestly. Jerry was off doing business man things, and Erin was off hanging with her besties on some beach somewhere. Kelley was the youngest of my older siblings, but shes 32, I’m 16, big age difference there. I’d been adopted by my family at a young age and so, of course there would be an age difference, but they were family and Kelley and I were close.

Anyway, back to my main point of how much this sucked. The nation went on lockdown literally a week into my stay, I couldn’t leave for the airport or anything and Kelley’s games and trainings were suspended after the SheBelieves cup, even the Olympics were cancelled. So I was stuck, but that wasn’t what sucked, I was with Kelley, that was great, but then came online school.

Online school, for someone like me, is the worst possible option. I struggled with ADHD and paying attention in a normal class, but sitting on my own in a room of distractions would be even worse, I mean... how was I NOT suppose to say dream or cheat on a test?!

Not only that, but I was awaiting my prescription, we had to start ordering it so it shipped to Kelley’s apartment in Utah. So with that going on, we were now in late March and we realized it would be another day before my pills arrives... and I was out.

“Kelley!” I yelled from my bathroom, looking at the empty bottle.

Kelley came rushing in, “What, what is it?!”

“I’m out of meds,” I said hyper focused on the writing on the bottle.

“Oh.... OH WHAT?!” She grabbed the bottle out my hands, shaking the orange container around as if she was trying to summon more pills to her.

“It’s just a day, it won’t be that bad right?” I said and Kelley looked at me with a glare.

“When was the last time you weren’t on your meds?” She asked.

I thought about it for a moment, “Uhh, probably before I was diagnosed.”

“So when you were bouncing off the walls?” She asked and I shrugged, walking out the bathroom.

“Look, I have school in like... oh actually I’m late,” I said looking at my phone, it was only 8, but class started at 7:45.

Kelley groaned as I rushed to my laptop, she had moved to the dining table after finding me staring at my ceiling for an entire class, she was fun as a sister, but her feeling of responsibly over me was unbearable.

I logged into the class with my camera off, apologizing for being late and I made up some random excuse. I looked to Kelley who had just walked out of my room, and she rolled her eyes at me and tossed me t-shirt. I muted myself and looked at her confused.

“You forgot to put one on,” she said before I could ask and I looked down at myself realizing she was right, so I begrudgingly pulled in on with a huff.

After my first class, I had my second period, which was a study hall, and I hated it, all I ever did was stare at off into space, which ended up happening this time too. I went through the whole school day, completely unable to focus on anything as I felt my ADHD consume my movements and thoughts.

“Y/N!” Kelley snapped me out of my trance, I realized she sat in front of me, working on something of her own, “Your teacher asked you a question,” she said.

I unmuted myself to apologize before asking her to repeat the question. The one good thing about ADHD was that I often retained large chunks of info if it was interesting enough, so I had the knowledge to answer the question this time.

When I muted myself again I sighed, it was times liked these I hated my condition, it was unbearable and made me miss so much shit.

“You okay Speedster?” A nickname Kelley had gifted me at the age of 4 when I literally couldn’t stop running around, it’s fitting now as I’ve followed in her footsteps and started playing soccer.

“I hate not being able to focus,” I complained and finally, as I said that, the class was over.

“Well,” Kelley started, closing my laptop for me, “Maybe you should walk around or something, get some focus back?” She asked, I sighed again, it was the best idea so far, “I’ll be here if you if you need me.”

I stood up, taking my computer to my room and threw it on the bed. There was no way I could focus on doing yoga or lifting weights, not at all. All I wanted to do was run around, do anything but what I was doing. It was probably about 5 minutes in my room before I rushed out my room, heading to the kitchen to search Kelley’s cabinets.

“What are you doing in there?” Kelley turned after I rummaged for a few minutes.

“Food,” I replied.

“If your hungry I can make you sandwich or something,” she said, looking away from her computer.

“Ughhhhh,” I complained, “A sandwich sounds so boring,” I groaned and she rolled her eyes at me, going back to the meeting she was in.

I left the kitchen, heading back to my room, sitting on my bed feeling restless. I tried writing and reading, I even did some homework, but eventually I got bored again, and I felt antsy. That is, until I found something I could compare to gold.

“No way,” I whispered to myself, pulling two things out from under the guest bed, “This is gonna be so much fun.”

Kelley’s POV

I was worried about Y/N, I knew she would feel bad about her ADHD, usually I’d go distract her, but I was caught in this stupid meeting for another few minutes. I was listening to what my manager was saying amongst the other people there, until something stung me.

I flinched, looking at my arm, then around me and at the floor, finding a... nerf bullet?

There was a click and another one hit my temple this time.

“Ow,” I complained, looking to where I heard giggling.

It was Y/N of course, hiding behind a cardboard cut out of me with a nerf gun reaching around it.

“Y/N, don’t you—“ She shot me again, laughing hysterically, I turned to my computer, “Listen guys, I’m gonna have to go, got something to sort out,” I said and they nodded as I logged off.

Y/N looked at me with a challenge, if this is what she needed to calm down, then I guess a little match wouldn’t be bad.

“It is so on,” I said, reaching into one of the kitchen cabinets.

“WHAT?! You have a nerf gun just sitting in your kitchen?!”

“Never know when it might come in handy,” I shot at her, the bullet sticking itself right in her forehead and she huffed and smiled.

“I’m gonna kick your ass.”

“You wish,” I replied.

Turns out the one round turned into three hours of an intense and heated nerf battle, ending with Y/N surrendering to the couch where sweat fell from her head.

“Alright, alright, you win,” she said exhausted for once and I plopped down on the couch next to her.

“Told you I’d kick your butt,” I said.

“Surrendering doesn’t mean you kicked my butt,” she complained and I laughed.

“How you feeling?” I asked, looking to her now.

“Exhausted for the first time today,” she said with a smile, “Never thought I’d be happy to be tired.”

I wrapped my arm around her shoulder and pulled her in to a hug, “You know there’s nothing wrong with your ADHD right?” I asked and she shrugged, “If you ever feel bad about it, remember that you can totally start a nerf war and it’s completely justified,” I said and she laughed.

“Thanks Kell.”

“Anytime kiddo.”

There was a pause.

“Do you have food?”

“I knew you wanted something.”

She laughed again and we spent the rest of the night eating and watching movies until we fell into a deep sleep.

[carry-on-my-wayward-butt]

He did? Umm.. what happened exactly?

(referring to this post)

my 11th grade chemistry teacher had an associates degree in liberal arts.

you know how in virtually every class you’ve ever had since middle school, your teachers made a big stink about the syllabus? she didn’t have one. this was her first teaching job, which she got because of her length experience as a substitute, not by her licensing qualifications. we were, at first, excited to have her, because she was a “fun sub” and we were 17 years old and stupid as all shit. we were the “normal chem” class in a system where the only other options were “honors chem” which was filled with children who actually know how to study (or cheat) and have an air of proper student activity, and “AP Chem”, which is clear enough if you’ve been an american student in the last 15 years.

she followed the mcgraw hill chemistry book in order of chapters, despite the fact that our state standardized tests did several of the chapters out of order. ever notice how you’ll suddenly be looking at chapter 11 when just last week you were on chapter 5, then the next week you’re on chapter 8? standardized testing is the reason. anyways by asking my friends in other classes who had chemistry teachers of relative competence, i was able to discern which chapters i should focus on, and while she was distracted with literally watching youtube videos all period, I was turning around in my seat and walking across the classroom helping my friends and enemies with the packets. (she was a two-packets-a-week kinda teacher.)

yes i said enemies too. the people i hated, i hated because they were sons of bitches i wouldnt piss on to put out a fire. i hated them so dearly i used to pray to god that they would bump into me so i could throw myself into the concrete and split my forehead open and get them expelled due to the blood-clause of our “zero-tolerance policy”. two of the kids in my class had, only the previous year, attempted to set my hair on fire.

i hated the teacher more. 

it gave me extreme pleasure to see her fume and clench her fists when a student would say “i need help” across the classroom and she would move to get up and they would say “oh not you miss, im waiting for vicky.” jesus christ the only time ive ever felt a comparable high was when i was at a halloween party in college where i was literally so zooted i couldn’t move.

it got worse over time, her getting more and more angry, my ego growing larger and larger. i was a huge bitch in high school, i really thought i was the smartest bitch in the room at any given moment. severe main character syndrome. imagine that kind of person actually being right for 45 minutes out of every day. can you even comprehend the kind of frustration that would create? in a room full of little sociopaths who dont give a shit about anything but getting this joke of a class over with so they can graduate? your first real teaching job and they look right past you, the teacher, to this annoying little shit whose grades are completely abysmal? how are they managing to learn anything from a child who can barely speak in front of more than 10 people? who turns cherry red in the face of literally every authority figure in the building except you? who can’t concentrate and stay still in one spot for more than five minutes? all of your other classes behave! they listen! they sit down and shut up and do the packets! so what fucking gives!!!

so you say “fine, since you all HATE ME so much i just won’t teach then!!!” on literally week fucking ten of teaching. and instead of prostrating themselves before you, begging you to like... point at transparencies and read directly from powerpoints i guess.

and they all collectively say “okay” and let the chipmunk child flutter between desks and help them memorize formulas and mnemonic devices and shit. surely her grades will suffer if she’s constantly dealing with other people and you’ll have justification that her horseshit is “distracting” and “a detriment to her studies”. she got bored gave up on that after two days after nothing changed.

then we did the midterm.

except at the end of the exam packet was something we never learned because again, she was going through the book chronologically. because i actually enjoyed the chem book (so much that i stole it when the year was up lmao), i knew the material.

it was about lewis dots/structures. i couldn’t tell you a damn thing about it today but in december 2010 i absolutely knew that shit. i didnt have too much of a problem with it in the exam, but the students who had gotten to that point were complaining and at first she pulled that “you should have been studying independently uwu” shit but the class was about to get loud during exam period so she shushed us and said that when we get to that point, just stop, and she’ll mark it correct during grading, no harm no foul just keep it quiet. one of the more confrontational students called horseshit and said theres no way we’re trusting that and there’s definitely no way anyone will keep an entire classroom cheating at the instruction of the teacher quiet.

i offered to teach it.

she scoffed, rolled eyes, said “sure fine but you can’t get your exam back” and i said “okay.” so when everyone was to the point in the exam, we piled them all on her desk and i used the whiteboard to briefly and quietly explain lewis dots, used the book examples and problems, and helped the other kids understand. there were a couple exam questions that were lifted straight from the book problems so i skipped those. while teaching i realized i had gotten a couple wrong which sucked :( it was an incredibly stupid experience overall, and no teacher worth the paper their certification is printed on would have allowed that to happen. and fucking yet.

anyways everyone but me got their exams back and finished it and many of us passed, only a few of them did particularly well.

discussing the chem exam with friends who also took the chem exam, many students found their anecdote about the lewis dots to be confounding, for you see, the exam we took was not, in fact, the midterm, but the god damned final.

she had us taking the fucking final because she didnt read the fucking folders which read “midterm” and “final exam” on them

she was reprimanded severely and we all had to take the exam on different days, in different classrooms, sitting very far apart. after that she hated me even more. like girl it was your fault lmao i am literally a teenager grow up lol. anyways you can imagine how much more fucking insufferable i became, knowing how miserable she was.

it all came to a head in february when some students were giggling quietly following a minor fuck up on her part regarding bellwork. they were making fun of her like “are you sure thats not tomorrows bellwork lol” and a friend next to me did the “hey i need help wait no miss not you sorry” thing and when i answered him, she solidly snapped. blah blah YOURE SOOOO DISTRACTING blah blah YOU THINK YOURE SOOOO SMART DONT YOU blah blah blah and she was like demanding i leave the room and shouting at the top of her lungs at me “ YOU POISON THE MINDS OF EVERY OTHER STUDENT HERE. YOU’RE POISONOUS VICTORIA, YOU’RE A VIRUS IN THIS CLASSROOM.”

i will never forget that line as long as i live. it was like crack to me. i moved to open the door to leave and the vp opened it first. he escorted me to the office and asked me what happened, then told me to keep my head down in class from now on, and that if i wanted to help my friends i should give them my number and help them out on our own time. i was like “bro thats really stupid” and he was like “thats all we can do right now but i promise we’re working on it”

i lasted the rest of the year giving smug smiles as we did packet after fucking packet for the rest of the year. they were all take-home work. i wasnt comfy giving my number to my enemies. the class camaraderie ended.

the final was altered. my class took a different final than the rest of the normal chem classes.

i started 12th grade and got a solid case of senioritis. i told that story to anyone who would listen. while it was happening, i obviously told my favorite teacher everything as it happened. when i mentioned it senior year he was like “oh yeah i forgot about her,

she was fired over the summer.”

[ihavenoconsistentname]

Fuck it Welsknight appreciation post

Just because I can

Just random stuff I love abt Welsknight

The amount of dipshits he's put up with?? Like literally so many people have hounded him for being burned out when he was burned out and people are basically doing it again and he's only shown a legitimately negative reaction to it ONCE. He puts up with it so much and somehow has only once seemed visibly discouraged by it (if you don't know what I'm talking about here, I think you can still find the post where I went on about it in my top posts)

Literally just,, getting a hello as you enter chat is instant serotonin

His humor is so simple but great

Don't get me started with the amount of snark contained in this man, it's glorious

Putting on a fucking Mr Mime skin to terrorize Nebris and naming his sword "Mr Mime's Loving Touch" telling us that one day he would kill Nebris with it and in the chat there would be a message saying Nebris was slain by Mr Mime's Loving Touch (this is in Pixelmon Beyond btw)

Season 5 when he was getting a screenshot standing in front of the end crystals pissed off an enderman got blown up by said end crystals and his death message said "Welsknight was blown up by Enderman"

Falling asleep to his streams just hits different,, he has such a soothing voice

THE SEA SHANTIES. HIS VOICE IS JUST SO GOOD. IT'S ANGELIC AND BEAUTIFUL.

When he makes jokes about his age because we call him old or because he has to restate that "the only one allowed to talk about their age in chat is me"

Yelling "YOU KILLED MY WIFE!" in Among Us twice even though he killed his wife immediately right in front of someone else

His laugh. His fucking laugh, oh my god. Precious. You cannot listen to his giggles and tell me that does not give you ridiculous amounts of serotonin hIS LAUGH IS JUST SO DORKY

The little baby voice he uses when he talks to Remi,,,

I just love how several times he complained to us about when he was deployed to go mess with files in an office for a week describing it as "twiddling his thumbs in an air conditioned office"

Law Nerdᵀᴹ

And english nerd,, he's said a lot that he was almost an english teacher

HE HAS TOLD US ABOUT A GOATEE AND I HAVE MILDLY SEEN IT IN A FACE CAM IN A TWITCH SINGS STREAM

Just,, the way he starts off his streams,, love it

The way he often says "My friends" to refer to his audience

I clearly remember one time at the end of a Twitch Sings stream when before the raid he said "I love you all to death" and I wanted to cry at that

He's so wholesome??? He's so wholesome.

He's so laid back and chill and just so easy to vibe with

He might not stream or upload super often but he's still such a nice cc to vibe with???

And you can tell he genuinely appreciates the part of his audience that genuinely appreciates him. Like. Not his entire "fanbase" because a lot of them only care about hermitcraft, I'm talking the people who tune into every stream solely because it's Welsknight and they enjoy watching him play whatever game he chooses to play that day.

I also honestly like his non-HC streams better because significantly smaller audience and he gets to respond to basically every chat message

Gotta love that Riveting Circle Contentᵀᴹ in pixelmon

I just love how much of a pokemon nerd he is??

He literally talks about having pants that say "pokemon master" on them

When he was telling us about how he was helping Wifey pick out her team for the pixelmon tournament (THAT SHE WON BTW) and said she pointed to one and went "That one does the funny thing"

He's got these fucking edgy middle schooler undertones and I just live for that like idk about anyone else but I totally feel like that's a thing he has

He literally described Helsknight's vibes as being an edgy/angsty teenager

Once again I just admire that he absolutely refuses to let his audience control him in any way. He is a full time content creator who makes most of his money off hermitcraft content but he still doesn't give a shit how many people try to force him to make hermitcraft content instead of doing whatever the hell he wants playing whatever the hell he wants to play. He appreciates his audience and is thankful for it but still does not give a shit what any of them have to say when he isn't playing on the hermitcraft server and making hermitcraft videos.

Also this might sound like I'm throwing mega shade at bigger ccs (no one in particular just a general thing) but he actually knows how to control and properly influence his audience/fanbase lol basically all of his actual fans aren't toxic and by actual fans I mean literally anyone who doesn't just demand hermitcraft but literally everyone is chill and in no way toxic because woah he actually knows how to influence them properly and control them and knows how to have fun while still strictly enforcing things to ensure that his audience doesn't become toxic and shit

And yes I know with that one big fanbases = less control but my main point is he basically just knows how to properly influence people so that they don't get out of hand in the first place and so that everyone in his audience knows how to make sure others don't step out of line either and they know to just shove those people away and not fuel any flames

I'm basically just saying I admire how he's able to even have such a chill audience?? Not really focusing on if he can control them or not it's just the sole fact that he was able to build such a wholesome and chill community in general

That's it cause this list does not need to be super long skgkjakg

[bbrandy2002]

Happy Birthday Jessica!

Title: Twinsane

A/N: Jessie, You already know Burns and I are big fans of your characters and stories, in particular your Leo and Drake. The three of us made our big writing debuts at the same time in the Summer of 2019 and became fast friends that have continued through every high and low we’ve each experienced in our lives. You’ve always been a great and supportive friend with a big heart and a bit of a funny bone. We both hope you have an amazing birthday and we wish you all the best in the coming year.

This story takes place in a universe created by @jessiembruno​.

Palace -- Throne Room

Liam paced the ancient throne room, site of their infant daughter’s upcoming anointing and baptism. Everything seemed to be in place; Regina had made sure of it despite the cast on her arm from her latest sex injury. 

Still, he worried. 

Not because of terrorist threats, not because of Lilyana possibly blowing out her diaper and ruining a $2,000 christening gown. No, he had two concerns: 

His brother and his brother-in-law. 

His wife tried to console him about it, but every time she did, the new father threw his hands up in the air and said, “I don’t want to talk about that stupid pendejo. I just can’t with him --” and the fights they had afterward weren’t worth it.

Leo had passed two kidney stones on the day Lilyana was born. Liam felt bad for him; he really did. Everything he’d heard about passing kidney stones was that it was a truly painful ordeal. 

But Leo, as always, had taken things too far. 

First of all, he’d named them: Rocky and Peter. He referred to them as “the twins,” and everywhere he went, that goddamn jar went with him. It was embarrassing to be somewhere with him in public and then to hear the telltale rattling as he adjusted change in his pocket. 

That was nothing, though, compared to when he’d bought “the twins” a Silver Cross Balmoral pram at the eye-popping price tag of seven grand. It was both nicer and more expensive than Jessica and Liam’s $2,700 Bugaboo by Diesel stroller; Liam had thrown a fit. And not just because Leo had charged them both to Liam’s credit card. 

“We are carting around a royal baby! You spent seven thousand dollars on a grocery cart for your goddamn kidney stones?” 

Leo, puffing out his chest, had merely clutched the jar of medical waste to his heart. “My children are royal adjacent, thank you very much.”  

At least Drake understood that the elder Rys brother was off his rocker, but since Drake flew all the way off the handle every time the subject was mentioned, Liam tried to avoid the inevitable blowups. Just last week, there had been an … incident at a formal dinner.

“Drake, will you watch the boys while I take a piss?” Leo had extended the jar toward the surly dark-haired man. 

“Get those fucken things away from me, Leo! Those were in your fucken dick! What the fuck is wrong with you?” 

Liam had tried to calm Drake down -- Princess Lesedi looked absolutely horrified at the outburst -- but as usual, Leo just made things worse. 

Huffing loudly, he proclaimed, “Lilyana was in Jessica’s bacon hole, and I don’t hear you complaining about that, Drake. You hold her all the time, but you never take the twins when I ask! I am through with this open favoritism!”

Only Alyssa, quietly intervening and taking the jar, had prevented a full-on brawl from breaking out. But since she started to cry when Drake refused to hold her hand afterward even following a thorough handwashing, the crisis hadn’t really been averted in the end. 

Thinking of Drake only led Liam to ruminate on Mateo, his brother-in-law. Nearly a year before, when the four friends had attended a Yankees game with Jessica’s brothers, Mateo had made a sloppy pass at Alyssa without knowing she was in a relationship. 

Well, to be more precise, he’d actually talked about Alyssa in front of her face, not realizing she spoke Spanish, and told his brother “Alyssa can sit on my face.” 

The only thing that had saved the weekend from devolving into complete anarchy was that Drake didn’t know enough Spanish to translate. But someone -- probably shit-starting Leo -- had explained Mateo’s words to Drake, and now Alyssa’s new husband was out for blood. 

If any of them ruin my little princess’ day, Liam swore to himself, I will murder them. I’m king. I can pardon myself. 

------------

Palace -- Ballroom

Lilyana was properly anointed and baptized. At the head table, overlooking the large gathering as he cradled his daughter in his arms, Liam looked over the party with a sigh of relief and scooped up another forkful of chicken tagine. Everything had gone off without a hitch, and now they just needed to feed all these people, hand the princess off to Regina or one of her doting aunts or uncles, and he could spirit his wife away to take his “royal scepter” anywhere she wanted it. 

His eyes tracked to Leo, who was in rapt conversation with Penelope across the room. When Leo pulled the jar out of his pocket, Liam threw back his entire scotch in disgust. 

Jessica, resplendent in a new Ana de Luca original, came back to the table. “God, these fucken people are intolerable, Liam. How much longer --” Her words were cut off when Liam wrapped his hand around her wrist. 

“My love, give our daughter to her grandmother. Te necesito. Ahora,” he added, eyes locked on hers. (I need you. Now.)

She took the baby from his arms and brought Lilyana to Alyssa. “The princess needs some time with her Auntie Lyss.” 

Alyssa smirked as she kissed the infant’s sweet-smelling head. “And the queen needs to get her back blown out?” 

Jessica tossed her hair. “Fuck yeah.” 

Alyssa high-fived her before she walked away. 

------------

Palace -- Liam and Jessica’s Quarters

“You’re so gorgeous, love,” Liam grunted, gripping a fistful of Jessica’s hair and tugging her head back, exposing her throat to his lips and teeth. 

She shuddered at the feeling, reaching for his thick length. “We don’t have a lot of time …” 

“We have as much time as it takes.” He unzipped the dress and slid it down her body, admiring the curves that had only become lusher with motherhood. Lowering her to the bed, Liam’s lips moved over Jessica’s breasts and stomach. He toyed with the waistband of her underwear. 

“Liam, please --”

The panties dropped to the ground, and her plea melted into a throaty groan at the first swipe of his tongue. “Fuuuuuuuuck.” 

“Yes, love,” he said against her, working her with his hands and mouth. “Dámelo.” (Give it to me.)

She was still shaking with her release when Liam crawled over her, his rigid cock probing between her thighs. “Now, muñeca.” 

Something crashed against the door. 

------------

Palace -- Ballroom 

To his delight, Leo had reunited with Miss Willoughby, his fourth-grade teacher. Though she was no longer as perky as he remembered and had grown an unfortunate goiter, she listened attentively to Leo’s stories about his children. 

She had had a lot of champagne. 

“Do you have a picture?” she asked at last, after Leo had regaled her with the tale of taking Peter and Rocky grocery shopping for the first time. 

“Even better than that.” Leo proudly reached into his jacket pocket. “Boys, I’d like you to meet Miss Willoughby.” 

The teacher shrank back with concern. “Leo … what -- what is that?” 

“They are Rocky and Peter.” He pointed to each stone as he introduced them. “Their birth was excruciating, but it was worth every moment of pain.” 

Miss Willoughby rubbed her misshapen throat lump. “Are those --” 

He heaved a long-suffering sigh. “Technically they are kidney stones. But the word ‘kid’ is right in there! Love makes a family, Miss Willoughby. Not your status as ‘human.’” He punctuated the last word with finger quotes of disgust.

------------

On the other side of the room, Drake’s gaze narrowed on a familiar face. “Devereaux!” he hissed. 

Alyssa looked up from where she had been singing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” to Lilyana. “What?” 

“Is that Jess’ fucken brother?” 

She bit her lip. It was Mateo, but no way was she letting Drake get involved in a brawl at the princess’ anointing, for Christ’s sake. “I don’t remember.” 

“What do you mean, you ‘don’t remember’?” 

Waving a breezy hand, Alyssa hastily tried to defuse the situation. “Oh, I was drinking a lot that day.” 

“A lot for you. Not for your average 15-year-old,” he snickered, agreeing. 

To Alyssa’s relief, the man had slipped out of sight. “Well, be that as it may, you should let that Mateo thing go. Everything’s cool.” 

He scowled. “It is not. I know he’s here today! I’m going to find him and kick the shit out of him.” 

-----------

“You should call me Roberta.” 

Leo raised his eyebrows. “Miss Willoughby -- Roberta. I would be delighted to.” 

She set down her flute. “You certainly grew up handsome …” 

Smoothing his blond locks back into place, Leo gave her a rakish grin. “Why, Roberta. How forward of you.” 

“Is there somewhere we can get away?” She reached out and gripped his ass with surprising strength. 

“I guess that depends on how much you’ve had to drink.” 

“The perfect amount.” Her hand slid around to the front, grappling with the front of his pants. 

“Whoooooooa. Well, in that case, yes. We can get away.” 

------------

Alyssa handed Lilyana to Drake in another attempt at distraction, nervous about the way he was pacing the room. “Uh, I have to use the bathroom. Can you take the baby?”

He was already cooing at Lilyana, assuaging Alyssa’s nerves until she made out the words. “And Uncle Drake’s gonna beat the fuck out of your Uncle Mateo ... yes, he is! Yes, he is!”

“Drake!” she gritted. 

“Because nofuckingone talks about your Auntie Lyssa like that; no, they do not!” he continued in a singsong voice, ignoring Alyssa completely. 

She rolled her eyes and headed out of the ballroom, content that he at least wouldn’t start any physical fights with a baby in his arms. 

------------

Palace -- Liam and Jessica’s Quarters

Jessica sat up with a start, unfortunately bending Liam’s manhood at an awkward angle. He screamed. 

“Who the fuck is at the door?” Her shrewd eyes, trained to find danger, scanned the room. She threw Liam’s jacket on -- their size difference meant it fit her like a gigantic robe -- and grabbed her taser. 

“Love, wait!” Liam struggled up from the bed, wincing at the pain in his dick. 

“Goddammit, Leo!” Jessica screeched upon throwing the door open. 

Her brother-in-law’s bare ass, driving rhythmically toward a faceless someone who was pressed against the opposite wall, greeted her. 

“Jess! Fuck!” Leo slowed. “Sorry, Roberta, hang on.” Continuing to hold her against him as a shield, he craned his head around to look at her. “I’m a little busy right now. What?” 

She slammed the door closed. “Liam, get dressed.” 

“What the fuck is going on?” The king complied, his good mood completely dissipated. 

“Your fucken brother is banging someone outside our door. I’m pretty sure his ass is the crashing sound we heard. His naked ass touched the door. I’m having maintenance replace it tomorrow!” 

------------

Palace -- Hallway Outside Liam and Jessica’s Quarters

Leo struggled back into his pants, grateful that his partner had kept her dress on. “Miss W -- Roberta, I’m really sorry, but we’re going to have to cut this short. Er, not that anything about me is short, obviously. But I’m pretty sure my brother’s about to come out here --” 

The door flew open. “LEO, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!” Liam raged. 

“Run!” Leo grabbed Roberta’s hand and took off running down the corridor, jacket in his other hand. 

------------

Palace -- Ballroom 

Alyssa hadn’t come back, but the more Drake stared at the man he had noticed earlier, the more he was convinced it was Mateo Garcia. 

That fucker. 

Lilyana had fallen asleep against his chest. He wasn’t going to disturb her or put her in danger, but … 

Drake looked at the abandoned plates of cake on their table. Steadying the baby with his left arm, he picked up a handful of cake and squeezed it experimentally in his fist. Maybe he hadn’t played ball with Liam and Maxwell in a few years, but he still had a decent arm. 

He rose, stalking closer to his target but staying close to the exit for a quick getaway. 

Drake raised his arm and fired. 

The handful of cake exploded against the man’s face. Spluttering, Mateo whipped his head around and roared, “What the fuck was that?” 

Drake and Lilyana slipped out the nearest door, almost colliding with a sweaty Leo, panic in his eyes. 

Leo grabbed Drake’s shoulders, careful to avoid Lilyana’s head. “Drake! We have a crisis on our hands!” 

He listened to Leo with only half his attention; his other ear focused uneasily on the new commotion of screaming and -- was that breaking glass? -- inside the ballroom. 

“So I need you to come on the search mission with me,” Leo finished. 

Drake shook his head to clear it, registering an older woman with a prominent goiter slinking back into the ballroom. “The fuck are you talking about? Did you just finish having sex with that woman?” He jerked a thumb toward Roberta.

The blond man scowled. “I didn’t get to finish, and neither did she, thanks to Jess and Liam’s drama.” 

“But the --” Drake gestured to his neck. 

Leo waved it off. “I hit it from behind. No distracting visuals that way.” 

“You, dickhead!” Drake grimaced. “Thanks for the mental image.” 

“My pleasure. Now, we need to go. Find someone to take the baby. I need you completely focused.” 

“On what? Where the fuck are we going?” 

“Have you not been listening to me? Jesus, Drake! I need you to help me find the twins!” Leo raked his hand through his hair, making it stand on end as his blue eyes burned with obsessive fire. “I took my jacket off when I was nailing Miss Willoughby -- er, Roberta -- and the jar must have fallen out. My children are missing, Drake!” 

Drake nestled Lilyana against his chest and covered one of her ears. “You -- you have lost the fucken plot, Leo. I am not searching for your -- your -- dick rocks!” 

“You were there at their birth, Drake. It hurts me that you take no interest in your godstones.” 

“Stop calling them my ‘godstones’! That is not even a goddamn word --” Drake broke off his rant as Alyssa appeared in the hallway, covered in red. “Jesus Christ! Baby!” He thrust Lilyana into Leo’s waiting arms; the baby woke up and began to cry. “What happened?” 

“Huh? You made the baby cry!” Alyssa went to take Lilyana, but Drake grabbed her.

“Look at you, Devereaux! Where are you bleeding from?” Frantic, he tugged the neckline of her dress aside, exposing her bra. She slapped his hand away. 

“Stop! I’m not bleeding!” 

“But --” He gestured to the bright stain marring her light blue dress. 

She looked down. “Oh, that. Someone dumped gazpacho on me when I was walking through the ballroom.” 

“What?” 

Alyssa pointed. “It’s anarchy in there; didn’t you notice?” 

The men peered into the room. Roughly 40 people, most screaming, flung food at each other, ducking to avoid flying lunch items and using plates and -- in several concerning cases -- overturned tables as shields. 

“What happened?” Leo looked concerned. 

Alyssa noted the guilty look on Drake’s face as she rocked and tried to shush Lilyana. “I think this baby needs to eat. Have you seen Liam or Jess?” 

The question seemed to snap Leo back to reality. “You should look for them, Lyss. Head them off --”

“What do you mean ‘head them off’?” 

But Leo continued, “And in the meantime, Drake and I need to find the twins!” He grabbed a loudly-protesting Drake by the arm and dragged him down the hall. 

A moment after they turned the corner, Alyssa, still rocking the baby, was startled by her voice from behind her. She turned her head to see Liam and Jessica stalking rapidly toward her. “Oh, I’m so glad you’re back!” 

Jessica took Lilyana, cuddling her. “Let’s go eat.” Stepping into the ballroom, she shrieked, “What the fuck?” 

------------

“I need you to help me file a missing persons report,” Leo said 15 minutes later, after they had repeatedly combed the hallways looking for the jar of kidney stones. “My children are in danger!” 

“Stop calling them your fucken children!” 

Leo pressed his lips together with frustration. “I went through two hours of labor and five minutes of pushing, all for your GODSTONES! The least you can do is help report the twins’ disappearance and bring them back to their Papi Chulo.” 

He was saved from Drake’s wrathful retort by a notification on Drake’s phone. “Oh, no you don’t,” Drake muttered, typing furiously on his keyboard. 

“What are you doing?” Leo huffed impatiently. 

“Someone outbid me for this lure I really want.” Drake finished typing and sucked in a breath. “Ohhhhh shit.” 

“What now?” 

Raking a hand through his hair, Drake extended his phone toward Leo. “Uhhhhh, I think you better look at this.” 

“HOberta69? Drake, don’t buy anything from a seller with that name -- holy shit!” he exclaimed as he looked closer. 

He clicked the link; the phone screen filled with his own image. “Yeah,” video Leo said, “it hurt like a son of a bitch when I pushed these li’l fellers out, but that’s parenthood!” He held up the jar and shook it. “The rascals.” 

Drake covered his face with his palm. “You are so fucken embarrassing.” 

“This fucken kidnapper! I give her the best two-pump-chumpin’ she’s ever had and this is how the old bag repays me? Oh, the fucken humanity! I will hunt her down! I will throw her in the dungeons! I will --”

“She’s basically holding them for ransom,” Drake said reasonably. “Maybe if you message her …” 

But Leo had already clicked the “buy it now” option. “Thank God I still have Liam’s credit card saved to my account.” 

Drake’s eyes widened. “You paid for the dick rocks? With Liam’s credit card? You know he’s gonna fucken kill you?” 

“Calm your tits, Drake.” Leo heaved a heavy sigh. “You and Alyssa haven’t created a family yet. The first lesson you’re gonna learn when the time comes, though, is that parenthood is full of bullshit sacrifice … and Liam is the lucky guy who gets to make that sacrifice.” 

[woeismyhoe]

Rachel Amber, The Broken Angel Who Demonized Herself

Fair warning, please bear with this probably incredibly **longass** (I’m not kidding it’s rlly long) analysis of one of the fandom’s most controversial disliked characters, Rachel Amber. This is just my attempt to analyze her character based on observation from BtS to LiS so by no means do you have to accept them. Productive discussions are obviously very welcomed :D

In LiS, when we asked about Rachel around campus, most of them had nothing but compliments and praises for the missing girl. She was essentially an honorary Vortex Club member who socialised with the snobs, yet she also hung out with the skater stoners and was friendly with those at the bottom of the social hierarchy. Then we see those graffiti around where it hints at Rachel’s promiscuity, debts and conflicts with other people. That’s the first sign we see that Rachel Amber isn’t as perfect as everyone was making her out to be. Afterwards we discover that Rachel was a stoner herself and into whatever drugs there were, partied harder than anyone else, promiscuous, entered a relationship with local drug dealer Frank Bowers while having a secret relationship with Psycho teacher Mark Jefferson— all while maintaining a 4.0 GPA in her studies and being considered perfect and adored by practically everyone in her school. The girl’s incredible, obviously, or maybe scary for someone to be so spread out in everything.

Rachel was a straight A student with a 4.0 GPA, an administrative assistant to the Principal, beloved by students and faculty alike, literal goddess beauty, had ambitions to be a model and study international law, daughter of the DA and was the closest to perfection anyone would ever be— so what went wrong? What made her romanticise the idea of running away from a town where everyone loves and adores her?

Because of the above.

Yes, it may sound whiny and dramatic to feel tired of being loved and being the center of attention all the time, but there’s no point to it if it’s not you who they adore, but the person you’re pretending to be— (“I was feeling angsty and reckless. Tired of living up to the perfect image everybody expects out of me.”) —especially when you have to do so much just to maintain the lie.

Throughout LiS and BtS, Rachel’s ability to get along with everyone was always mentioned. At face value she was akin to a social butterfly. She hung out with stoners regardless of their social status (skaters or the vortex club), was friendly with anyone regardless of their place in the social hierarchy (eg; Daniel/Evan/Steph/Drew/Nathan) or even to strangers others usually ignored (Samuel/Homeless lady). Like Evan said, Her friends were her friends. She wasn’t one to let peer pressure affect her relationships so she wasn’t afraid to make all those acquaintances.

However, for those who knew her closely (Chloe and Jefferson), she was referred to as a chameleon, someone who blended in with everyone and everywhere seamlessly. This was an important detail regarding who Rachel was and her intimacy with others. To be able to make that comparison, they would’ve needed to know who the person Rachel actually was underneath the masks she’d created over the years. Chloe was the first to truly see and accept her for who she was. Jefferson was the one who exploited her for it.

For most, being a social chameleon would count as a beneficial social skill if they’re subtle. So long as the person doesn’t lose themselves in the process and is able to separate their personas from their true self, it remains a skill and will be used as such.

The problem with Rachel was that it transcended beyond a skill. A social chameleon was *what* she became, and that led to losing her own sense of identity, to becoming a stranger in her own body.

We see her confiding to Chloe about this feeling in Brave New World: (“Do you think there’s a point when you’ve been acting so much that you don’t even have your own personality anymore? You’re just whatever you think other people want you to be?”) —to which Chloe tells her she does have a personality because she assumed Rachel was talking about herself. But Rachel apparently wasn’t and clarifies she was talking about her father. She then elaborates on how her father doesn’t really exist, that how he was in the principal’s office was a mere performance and then the actual truth— that she’s afraid she’ll end up like him.

No matter how you interpret that scene, the conclusion is that one of Rachel’s fears was becoming like James— someone who’s been so wrapped up in all the lies and manipulation that he no longer seemed recognisable to even his own daughter.

At that point her defence mechanism of deflection and avoidance came into play after Chloe got a little too close to home. We first see this on the train scene when they play Two Truths and a Lie. Rachel gave factual statements as opposed to Chloe who gave facts that elaborated into her personal life. At one point Chloe can ask how Rachel knew about having a distal radius fracture and It’s a very minor detail, but when she explains that it’s because she broke her wrist when she was 10, she says it extremely fast. When Chloe is about to press for more info about something personal no matter what option you choose, Rachel dismissively turns around the conversation from herself back to Chloe again.

The next time we see her deflecting is right after witnessing her father cheating. When Chloe asks about her, Rachel deflects and guilt trips her into somehow thinking she’s at fault for failing to get them wasted and then proceeds to drown her sorrows into alcohol instead of opening up. Afterwards when they find the junkyard, Rachel chooses to isolate herself from Chloe and withdraws to the corner, getting irritated if Chloe chooses to invade her space. When Chloe confronts her about her sudden moodiness, Rachel yet again deflects and shifts the attention to Chloe by essentially telling her she’s self-centred. This scene was classic Deflection 101 brought by Rachel’s defence mechanism to cope with her father’s betrayal.

Rachel uses deflection and avoidance as a defence mechanism, a habit which stems from the dynamics of the Amber family. When you have a Politician as a father whose life work is to manipulate and lie, and a Stepford Wife as a mother who wilfully acts like a servant to her husband out of sacrifice and duty— an environment of deceit and suppression of one’s feelings will be fostered. This is what shapes Rachel to be distrusting and unhealthily altruistic as we see in BtS.

And so Rachel’s deflection is driven by 2 things: mistrust (James) and her unhealthy altruism (Rose).

As a district attorney, James unfortunately carried his work persona into his personal life and can be presumed to lie to even his own family on a daily basis to the point that Rachel can tell when he’s lying: (“When your Dad is the District Attorney, I guess lying is...something you're used to.”) (Why can't you just tell me the fucking truth?! Stop lying! Stop being a politician for one fucking minute! Can’t you just be my Dad?”) What that tells us is that Rachel’s actually used to being lied at and treated with cynicism, so naturally that would make her guarded around others. Not to mention since James often exercised his professional prerogative (just recall how he spoke to Chloe and her comment about his micro-aggressions towards his own family), it’s most likely that he was also cynical towards people in general and carried that mindset forward at Rachel as well.

As for Rose, you have to really observe how she carried herself and her choice of words. A lot of people pointed out how robotic she sounded and blamed it on bad voice acting, but I think that was actually intentional. She was too mannered, too submissive and too robotic as a person. It’s not exactly a bad thing, but a lot of her personality seemed to be too... *political* for the sake of her husband’s political career. It was altruistic in the way that she sacrificed her own needs for her husband’s and was unfailingly supportive (eg; preparing dinner all by herself, *respectfully* asking James for his drink, even going so far as to excuse James for kissing Sera like wtf). Point is, Rose was the stereotypical political wife whose job was to shut up, look good and smile for her husband while he does the talking. At one point in the dinner scene when they start fighting, James even dared to say ‘Rose, let me handle this’ as if Rose’s voice was irrelevant and unimportant to the table (when he literally just got exposed for cheating lmao).

So what happens when your family environment consists of a father who actively lies and uses manipulation to twist facts, expects you to be compliant in exchange for rewards (birthday money), has the ability to read people, and a mother who does too much for someone who does the barest minimum for the family and represses herself for the sake of others? An environment of deceit and suppression will be fostered, and you develop all of their qualities, for better or worse. That’s difficult to change when your own family dynamics molded you to be that way and then reward you for it. If you recall, Rachel’s mannerisms changed completely when in front of her family and if Chloe complained about having to play the goody two shoes formal well-behaved humorless girl, Rachel would say: ‘try doing it your whole life’. So not only was she playing different roles in school but evidently at home as well.

But It’s not as if the Amber family was aware of the toxic environment they’d created. That’s just what their normal was: to be well-mannered, formal, professional, mature and well-articulated.

This is where Rachel’s social chameleon tendencies develops. Social chameleons usually have reasons for blending in when it comes to personal relationships:

1. Being liked is important for them (they value what people think of them).

2. They want to blend in so as to not stand out (they don’t like attention).

3. They’re doing it to make the other person comfortable (the needs of others come first before theirs).

Considering how Rachel was extremely popular, active in all sorts of school activities and enjoyed the attention of being the star, no. 2 is out. She confessed to wanting to stop being a social chameleon and didn’t seem to care much about Victoria’s dislike of her + she also did it to her family so no. 1 is out as well, which leaves us to no. 3— doing it for the comfort of others. In other words, because she *gave too much shit about other people all the time*.

What further supports the point of Rachel’s unhealthy altruism is what she says to Chloe at the junkyard— (“Maybe you should try giving a shit about other people for once.”) —which essentially tells us that she’s been doing exactly that to be able to lecture Chloe into following her own perspective. Another example would be what she tells Chloe during their therapy session: “—Because she was tired of having to give so many fucks all the time.”

One thing however that all *extreme* social chameleons share is the fact that they **loathe** themselves, or at the very least— dislike who they are. Why else would they go all the trouble of creating different personas for everyone to the point of forgetting their own, if they actually liked themselves?

One of the many things that Chloe and Rachel shared in common was their self-awareness in how undeniably shitty they can be, and that they hated who they were. Whereas Chloe embraced that whole part of her down her self destructive road, Rachel tried to cover hers up by playing other roles for people. Both girls played their sides to the ends of the spectrum; Chloe being selfish (causing problems for everyone in general unnecessarily) and Rachel being selfless (posing no problem for anyone in general even if there was a problem). They had no healthy balance and their unhealthy mindset ultimately drove them down a self destructive path.

Rachel knew she was selfish by nature, and that she’d take it out on Chloe in Ep 1. That’s why instead of talking about what was wrong, she chose to drown herself to alcohol and distance herself from Chloe. When Chloe confronts her about it, she either tells her that not everything revolves around her or that she should try giving a shit about people for once. In other words, ‘Other people have bigger problems than you so shut up and don’t make it worse for them.’ That was Rachel’s mentality and in that moment of poor lapse in judgment, she applied that logic to Chloe expecting her to think the way she does— to put others before yourself.

With Rachel, she always had her walls up and couldn’t help it even if she wanted to because it's practically second nature to have her guard up (“I never said how dearly I hold thee; my habit's been to keep my soul well-draped.“). It’s only in her lowest vulnerable moments is when she finally let her walls down because that’s when she’s too tired to keep them up.

Luckily (or unluckily) for Rachel, she recognized her problem. The only thing is that she didn’t know how to solve them. She confided to Chloe about feeling like she doesn’t exist, but then backtracked and clarified she was talking about her dad instead when Chloe got too close to home. Even IF she was genuinely talking about her father, it doesn’t erase the fact that she believed there was a possibility she was going to become like him— because she already saw the signs and made the comparison between them.

Remember her infamous outbursts in Awake? Unlike Chloe, she’s the type who keeps everything bottled in until it’s too much. Seeing her father kissing another woman was the breaking point and that’s why she reacted badly. And then when she kicked that bin, that was equivalent to Chloe smashing up the junkyard. And then that scream. That scream was the result of years bottling her pent up frustration, stress, anger at everyone including herself. Because she did everything to make her family proud, to please everyone to the point that she felt so empty and hollow, only to realize that it was all for nothing because her father was destroying her family. It wasn’t just a betrayal from her father but a betrayal to herself.

And then there’s Chloe Price. The girl who is the total opposite of her, yet who she can somehow still connect with at the same time. While she cared too much about what others thought, Chloe gave absolutely no fucks. That was her most attractive and admirable quality for Rachel. So what does she do? She latches onto Chloe to do exactly what she knows best. Become the ideal version of whoever wants her to be. In other words, the Rachel Amber who would finally give no fucks.

Rachel was the closest to her truest self when she was around Chloe. Just as she brought life and hope back into the girl’s life, so did Chloe for her. Chloe broke the walls she put up, and she’d seen her vulnerable enough times to let her mask slip. Chloe saw her at her lowest, ugliest self even when she wasn’t doing her usual thing of keeping everyone around her happy, yet she didn’t mock or leave her for it. For the first time, she was selfish, and *still* Chloe came back. That was a BIG reason to trust each other for the both of them. And that’s ultimately what bonded them for so long— the fact that they could be the shittiest people on earth, yet still see the best in each other even if they only see the worst in themselves.

Chloe was the first one to see through her social chameleon act because she slipped, and she continued to let her unmask who she was because that night Rachel just didn’t care enough to hold up the act any longer. This detail of Rachel’s chameleon act slipping *only* when something was wrong is a vital part in understanding the context around her. The first time was when she witnessed her whole world crash, the second was when she realized she was becoming like James, and the third was when she discovered what a monster James was. The fourth— when she asked that trucker for a drive out and didn’t bother to be her usual social chameleon self. We may never know what happened, but something wrong was going on in Rachel’s life that she didn’t want Chloe to be a part of— because why would she put the girl who stuck by her during her darkest hours through her bullshit again?

But at the end of the day, that wasn’t enough. Chloe wasn’t enough. And that’s understandable because a teenager truly can’t and shouldn’t have to be responsible for someone else’s happiness. No matter what choice Chloe makes at the end of BtS, the truth inevitably gets out and leads to Rachel having a fall out with her parents. When that happened, she lost a big pillar of her support system which only leaves her with Chloe who’s another emotionally damaged teen that’s on the road to self-destruction. Chloe can’t help others without helping herself first. But still, who else is there to make them feel a little less shitty except each other?

After her fall out with her parents and her father in particular, she seemed to have developed a taste for men twice her age: Frank Bowers (32) and Mark Jefferson (38). Whatever the reason her relationship with Frank was, she still wrote him those letters and seemed to have cared for him to some extent. Not only was he the source for drugs for her very much needed escape, but he was also the man who helped save her life in one of her most vulnerable moments, and a possible lead to find Sera. It’s not that surprising she’d seek comfort and safety in his arms when he already proved himself once. But clearly it wasn’t serious because she was fooling around with Jefferson at the same time (and Frank knew they wouldn’t have lasted anyway).

Now, Jefferson. The devs confirmed that Rachel was in love with Jefferson and honestly, that’s the least surprising thing ever considering how he basically had the female population of Blackwell head over heels for him. Even Rachel wasn’t immune to that psychopath’s charm. He was a well reputable photographer, had the connections to propel her modeling career, was attractive and mysterious and apparently a damaged soul. He was the perfect one way ticket out of Arcadia Bay. He was her photographer and she was his muse. He was basically the perfect solution to her problems.

The girl clearly had deep rooted daddy issues and was ashamed of it herself since she couldn’t even share her secret relationship to the one person she trusted the most despite sharing her other relationships with her (except Frank).

This is where the drugs and partying come in. They’re a way for her to escape the bullshit in her life for a few hours. Chloe was what made her feel real, but the drugs and partying was what made her forget— forget that her biological mother chose drugs and money over her (twice), forget that her own father was so despicable that he was planning to overdose Sera (this is what Chloe said in the silent dialogue), forget that her biological mother may just be dead somewhere because of James, forget that her own family was a lie, forget all the expectations placed upon her, forget that she herself was a lie, forget that she was so insecure that she had to seek warmth and safety in the arms of men twice her age, forget the guilt of knowing the girl who would die for her was still not enough, forget that at the end of the day all her problems is caused by her own mind and that her own fears had come to reality. And she hated herself for that.

But still, Rachel wasn’t a total junkie or outwardly self destructive to the point that she abandoned her studies like Chloe did. She didn’t let the drugs and partying dictate her life, hence the 4.0 GPA. After all, she still had a reputation to maintain. She was still the DA’s daughter, and getting into college was still a way to get out of Arcadia Bay.

BUT SEE, that was exactly Rachel’s problem. She could never choose which to be; The Problematic Junkie of a Disappointment (Sera), or the Golden Child (James & Rose) everyone expected her to be. She wanted to be as free as Chloe, but she also didn’t want to be a disappointment. She was tired of everything but couldn’t allow herself to fall because it was her nature to demand the best of herself for others as long as she could do it. But what happens when it’s your very own nature you’re going against? It gets really complicated. So instead of choosing, she doesn’t and becomes both. That was ultimately the worst decision she ever made.

Make no mistake, Rachel was an absolute idiot for being so indecisive. She could have easily solved her problems if she just finally gave no shit and did whatever she wanted to. But that’s the problem with people who’re labeled as perfect growing up. They eventually believe it and demand perfection of themselves. They care too much about everything because if they have the ability to be perfect, then why would you choose not to be? When someone is seen to be perfect, disappointment is 10x worse. Even Chloe was guilty of idealizing Rachel to be this perfect girl and was disappointed when she realized Rachel was just like everyone else who puts in hard work—(“Rachel's always made being an A student seem so easy. Almost sad to see all this... effort."), but it’s Chloe accepting Rachel for who she was despite no longer being the perfect girl she believed her to be that mattered.

With being seen as perfect usually comes with the assumption that your whole life is. Just as everyone invalidated her problems because she’s Little Miss Perfect with the perfect grades and the seemingly perfect family, so did she.

‘Cause hey, what does she have to be mad about when she’s a rich white girl who’s been given everything she’s ever wanted, right? (James basically said that). At that point the only problem Rachel had was that she was acting as the perfect daughter and perfect friend and perfect student at the expense of her own happiness, and then throw in the sudden slap in the face that it was all for nothing because her father was destroying the family she’d tried so hard to do proud.

But then again even if that wasn’t enough reason to spiral, it really would mess you up if your own father told you that your biological mother chose money and drugs over you, that everything you’ve done so far was all for a lie and worst of all, that your own father was going to kill your biological mother and there’s nothing you can do to change that. I mean really, I’m not a therapist or anything but I wouldn’t be surprised if Rachel’s mental health was suffering by that point.

I mean get this: she abused drugs and partied harder than anyone else and got wasted even though she knew they were wrong (Sera would’ve been a painful reminder), slept around with older men who undoubtedly took advantage and controlled her, continued to act like the perfect student and pretended to be someone she’s not just to keep everyone happy even though it was causing her to question her own existence— it’s almost as if she was punishing herself for continuing down that path.

Ultimately what Rachel was running away from was who she had become in Arcadia Bay. Once she’d be out, she wouldn’t be Little Miss Perfect anymore. She wouldn’t be the DA’s daughter. She wouldn’t have to keep lying. She would be able to start over. She would just be Rachel Amber, the nobody.

She cared too much in contrast to Chloe’s ‘I don’t give a shit’ attitude, and that’s why she still managed to maintain her perfect image even when she was already so broken. Whereas Chloe’s first instinct was to blame others, Rachel’s was to blame herself. Both never had a healthy balance when it came to accepting responsibility and that’s what connected them so well together.

Call it selflessness or selfishness or stupidity or melodrama, but at the end of the day Rachel tried to keep everyone around her happy, just like Max tried to do with her powers except Rachel used lies to do it. She was greedy and selfish, no disagreement to that, but she also tried to be selfless for most of her life. She was her own enemy and she demonized herself for it. And that got her murdered, thrown and buried away like the used rag doll she treated herself to be.

She was Chloe’s angel and Chloe was hers, but she was also her own demon. And there’s only so much two broken angels can do against a demon.

**TL;DR:** Idealizing her to be the Perfect Girl was what made her want to run away. Her family was what broke her. Desperation for escape was what killed her. Her family just *really* suck.

Now, I’m not trying to justify Rachel’s actions but merely rationalizing her character. I acknowledge that she was capable of being a shitty person at times, but just as Chloe had her issues, so did she, and so I choose to see them both for what they tried to be. Good hearted people just trying to make their shitty life a little easier. At the end of the day, Rachel Amber was a deeply flawed, insecure and emotionally damaged girl that pretended like nothing was wrong to forget about her troubles for a little, and was just dealt a bad hand in life. Literally.

After writing all of this, I realize that holy shit this girl was fucking complicated and a single post doesn’t do her justice nor explains her character properly enough. I thought it’d be simple enough to word it out, but then again, someone who was basically a junkie yet still managed to maintain her perfect reputation amongst her peers and the faculty is bound to be this complexed. Also as you can see I got very lazy at the middle of the elaborations and repetition has probably made this unnecessarily long but thank you for reading and finishing this overall confusing and messy essay.

[heliads]

Inked Wrists Chapter 7: Back to School

When you turn eighteen, your soulmate’s name appears in a tattoo on your wrist. What happens when the name on your wrist reads Theo Raeken, and when you have to hide your identity from him?

previous / series masterlist / next

It’s good to have Theo back. Words can’t even describe the happiness you feel when you wake up each morning and sense that he is close to you again. After everything you’ve been through in the past few months, it is paradise to know that he loves you and you love him. It’s funny, saying you love him, because you’ve been hiding it from yourself for so long. You don’t know why, but you felt like you couldn’t love him while you were using the fake name- you kept walls between you two and you weren’t even sure if he wanted you at all. Now, you’ve allowed all your barriers to come crashing down and live happily with your soulmate.

Speaking of living with him, you talked it over with Theo and he decided that he wanted to go back to high school with you. It’s been a few weeks since the incident with the hunters, but you think it’s finally safe to return to normal life. After the hunters’ plan to take down both Scott’s and Satomi’s packs failed, they retreated to their bunker in shame. They launched a few more misguided attacks, but you and your friends were able to repel them, especially thanks to Nolan’s help. At first, you were surprised when the former hunter had showed up at Liam’s door, but he explained that he’d had a change of heart and was more than willing to provide you with information regarding the hunters. He’d been a valuable ally and instrumental in the decline of the hunters’ power over Beacon Hills.

Now, life is back to normal. Most of the hunters were just ordinary people, and they’ve been able to move on from their time as hunters to coexist with werewolves. The few extreme hunters, like Monroe, that couldn’t accept life with supernaturals have fled Beacon Hills. You’re not sure when they’ll come back, if ever, but you know that you and your friends will be able to easily defeat them if they try.

So, with the threat of the hunters eliminated and you and Theo left with no life-and-death conflicts to fill your days, you two decided to return to high school. It wasn’t that difficult to get Theo back in-he had left around halfway through the last year and so he could pick up in about the same place. You’d asked him if he was worried about forgetting everything he’d learned from last year, and he’d just responded with that signature smirk on his face: “I’m not worried about anything. I met this really pretty girl, and I know I can count on her for anything. I even wrote her name down on my arm so I wouldn’t forget it.” He holds up his soulmate tattoo, and you can’t help but laugh.

Thus, you find yourself walking down the halls of your school once more. You pause at your locker, opening it and reaching for the books inside. Down the hall, you see Theo walk towards you and move more slowly so he can catch up with him. Out of the corner of your eye, you see another girl walk up to Theo, wrapping her arm around his and smiling at him through pink glossed lips. “Hey, handsome. Where are you headed?” She oozes confidence, but her smirk turns to a frown when he untangles himself from her. “I’m going to meet up with my soulmate, actually.” The girl puts on a fake pout. “She doesn’t have to know.” Theo stops walking and turns to the girl, looking her straight in the eyes. “You know, one time I was dating this girl who pretended to be my soulmate so we could be together. Do you know what happened to her?” The girl winks at him through lowered lashes. “You enjoyed her company.” Theo grins. “I killed her.” With that, he walks the rest of the way to you, leaving the girl with her mouth hanging open in shock. “You know, I don’t think you have to go out of your way to terrorize every girl who flirts with you.” You laugh at him. “Maybe I just wanted to. Did you see her face?” He grins, and you two walk down the hallway to your next class, talking all the while.

It’s good to be back at school. You finally get to feel like a normal teenager, going to class and doing all the things everyone else does. After you leave class, you head to the lunch table your friends always claim, and sit down next to Lydia. Liam flops down across from you. “Why did Coach Finstock become a teacher? Like honestly, why?” Stiles grins. “Don’t you love his unique teaching style? If he wants to be head coach for lacrosse, he has to teach at least one class, so he chose the one he thought would be easiest.” Liam just groans. “If it weren’t for the fact that I’m on the lacrosse team, I’d just skip all his classes.” Theo walks up from behind you and sits down on your other side. “Are we complaining about Coach Finstock? Guy just told me I look like I have the biceps of a mountain lion. How am I supposed to respond to that?” You can’t hold back your laughter. “A mountain lion? Seriously?”

Liam rolls his eyes. “Get used to it. He gives out weird compliments to whoever he wants on the lacrosse team. He’s always talking about getting new players, especially since Kira left to go train with the Skinwalkers. Coach won’t leave you alone until you either join the team or find some excuse to get out of it, like breaking your arms and your legs and also being dead.” The table dissolves into laughter and friendly chatter breaks out amongst your friends.

On the way back from lunch, though, you can tell Theo’s lost in thought about something. Finally, he turns to you. “I’ve been thinking about what Liam said. Do you think it would be alright if I tried out for the lacrosse team? Like, would they mind?” You smile up at him. “I think it would be a great idea. They’d welcome a new player, and as long as you don’t try to challenge Scott for the title of team captain, you’ll fit right in.” Theo nods. “There’s another practice this Friday. I might go talk to Coach before then and see if he can let me join.” 

Before you know it, Friday has come around. Theo’s delighted- Coach took one look at him and told him he could join the team for as long as he wanted. They have a practice during lunch today, and Theo made you promise that you’d come watch. “I need moral support on my first day.” Thus, you find yourself climbing through the bleachers to sit beside Mason as the lacrosse players warm up on the field in front of you. Mason leans back, grabbing a notebook so at least he can pretend to study. “This is my favorite part of the day.” You laugh at him, taking a notebook of your own out of your backpack. “Shameless.” You tease, and he pretends to frown. “Can’t I support my soulmate in peace?” “Sure, if I thought you were only here to support him and not anyone else.” Mason rolls his eyes. “Yeah, it would be nice if Eight-Pack Brett were here, but we can’t have everything.” You groan. “I don’t know how you can stand the guy. He’s totally not worth your time! I think his ego’s even taller than he is.” As the two of you laugh, you see Theo on the field. He looks up at you and waves, and you return the gesture, letting a light smile cross your face.

Theo ends up really enjoying lacrosse. You’re not sure whether it’s because of the comradery between his teammates, the excitement of the sport, or just because he gets to tackle anyone and everyone who stands in his way. Coach is thrilled, of course, and so the number of kids he sends limping to the sidelines just grows and grows. You don’t mind his liking the game yourself- you’re glad it makes him happy and you’re glad you get to watch him run around on the field during practice, sometimes with his shirt off. Whoops.

You also get to flaunt his jersey in the halls. You’re not sure why, but something about wearing his number on your back makes you feel even closer to him. Theo certainly doesn’t mind, and so you keep stealing it from him.

Before long, it’s time for Theo’s first lacrosse game. The stakes are high- Beacon Hills is playing Devenford Prep tonight, the one team they can’t always beat. You’re sure that with Theo playing, Beacon Hills should have no trouble crushing them, but you can still feel the unease radiating from the lacrosse team when you show up to the game that night.

You’ve snuck around back to visit Theo before the game starts, and he’s only got a few more minutes with you before Coach Finstock starts one of his famously awful speeches. You wish him luck and kiss him goodbye, then run up to the bleachers to sit with Mason, Lydia, and Malia. Lori’s sitting a ways away from you with her friends from Devenford Prep, and you give her a quick wave before turning your attention back to the field.

“Do you think we’ll win?” Malia asks from beside you. Mason scoffs. “Of course we will. If you check the numbers, we’ve got two werewolves and two chimeras against only one werewolf. It’s simple math.” You laugh at that. “Devenford’s got some players who are good without being supernatural.” Mason raises his eyebrows. “Your school spirit is sorely lacking, Y/N.” You shove him playfully. “Don’t get me wrong, I think Theo and everyone else is going to crush them, I’m just saying. It’ll be an interesting game.”

As the players run out onto the field, you make eye contact with Theo, who grins up at you. The Devenford Prep players take their positions opposite them, and before you know it, the game is started.

It’s a fairly even game, to your surprise. You can tell your friends aren’t using their supernatural abilities- they prefer to play fairly, although the same cannot be said of Devenford Prep’s team captain. You swear you can see the yellow glow of his eyes from here. Your friends still manage to keep their cool, until Liam and Theo are sprinting side by side towards the goal. Liam’s got the ball, and he’s about to pass it to Theo until your soulmate gets knocked down from behind by Brett. Instantly, you’re standing, hands pressed to your mouth in horror. The referee is yelling at Brett, something about an illegal move, but that doesn’t change the fact that Theo was knocked down pretty hard. Brett is about to walk away, but decides to whisper one last thing to Theo. You can’t make out exactly what he said, but you could have sworn you heard your name.

It’s the mention of your name that finally unlocks Theo’s anger. He stands up quickly, glaring at Brett. Without a word, he lines up at the starting line, lacrosse stick in hand. When the referee’s whistle blows to start the game, he’s running faster than you’ve ever seen him run before, already in possession of the ball thanks to a quick throw from Scott. Before you know it, he’s already scored! 

Cheering, you clap as loudly as you can. Theo goes on to score again and again, and there’s nothing Devenford Prep can do to stop him. By the time the game is over, he’s helped Beacon Hills maintain domination over the other team. When the players finally leave the field, you run up and throw your arms around him. “You were amazing!” Theo shakes back his sweaty hair from his face. “Thanks, babe. Only for you.” You can’t help but smile.

Once Theo’s showered and finished with post-game rituals, you’re waiting for him at home. You’re finishing up a text on the phone when you hear him come into the room and greet him with a kiss. “How’s the lacrosse superstar doing today?” He grins at you, exhausted but pleased with himself. “Not too bad, actually.” You talk for a while about the game, then settle down for a late night movie.

 It’s odd, though- you’ve barely started the movie long enough for the opening credits, but you hear a loud knocking on the door. You’re not expecting anybody, but the knocking is insistent and echoes throughout the room. You and Theo exchange glances, then get up together to see who it is. The second you open the door, you can’t help the stunned gasp that leaves your mouth.

Standing on the doorstep, covered in mud and scratches as if he’d run through the woods for hours, is a member of your old pack. One who you thought was dead.

Your older brother.

tag list: @linkpk88​

[bokunoheroanalysisforthefuture]

Whoo boy, been a little bit. I can’t really say much besides IRL sucks, so. Back to something that doesn’t suck, which is BNHA. This chapter is dedicated to the good bean Tenya, especially his little smile which forced me to change my pfp on discord because I just couldn’t.

I was kinda planning on doing arc summaries between sections, but honestly, the BNHA wiki already has those, so if you don’t want to go back and read through all the posts I’ve done for the pre-USJ chapters, just head over there and do a skim of the summaries there, I guess?

[No. 12 - Yeah, Just Do Your Best, Iida!]

I just love how his hand gestures are actual effective tools against enemies, I cannot even. Also, a good and friendly reminder that carbonated drinks stall his engines! I have never seen that used in fanfic, whether for crack or whump purposes… a shame.

We head right into the next morning from that battle training, with the kids being held up by the media as they ask about All Might. Izuku is a bundle of nerves as he awkwardly excuses himself to the nurse’s office, Ochako is a darling who describes All Might as super muscly, and Tenya goes into a whole ass speech with a lot of fancy language to explain the honor of being at UA and learning under All Might. 

(Honestly, I find it hard to determine whether this is genuinely earnest or if he’s picked up media warding skills from his parents and older brother. It’s probably genuine, but I just love the idea behind low-key troll master Tenya who learned from the best, aka his older brother.)

Katsuki, unfortunately, is still known as ‘the kid from the sludge incident’, which I mean. I am so fucking baffled at how long the media in this have held onto that 'sludge incident' thing, like, you'd think they'd have moved on to other things by now and don't really think about it much.

It’s the same with the general public (as seen in chapter 3), like, yes, I too would have a fucking complex and anger issues if all anyone thought about in relation to me wasn't my high grades or my skill in combat or anything, but that one time a year ago where I was almost suffocated to death while the people who were supposed to save my life did fucking nothing. I mean, Katsuki has always had a complex, but This Didn't Help.

Moving on, we see the media wondering who the fuck this messy looking dude waving them off is, while Aizawa just. Fucking shoos them like they’re dogs or kids or something. His words seem like a vague attempt at being polite about shooing them, but with the hand gesture, well. Basically comes off more as a chastisement. 

...honestly, this feels so weird that no one knew about it even though the kids who got in got a message from All Might saying he’d be teaching there. The only thing I and the others can assume is that there was an NDA on him teaching until it was announced to the newspapers on the first day of classes. Which would explain why it didn’t hit the news until said day…

Whatever, it’s weird, let’s just move on.

One of the reporters steps forward, asking/demanding a chance to speak to All Might about his sudden shift to teaching, only for the guy behind her to try and call out a warning - just a touch too late, as the sensors over the gate react, causing the daunting hunk of metal serving as a gate to slam closed right in front of her. Gonna guess she’s new to the reporting scene. The guy explains that the UA barrier locks down if someone without a school ID approaches the gate, and that supposedly there are more sensors throughout the campus.

The panel gives us a diagram of the three ‘levels’ of sensors - the gate/wall around the school, the walkway to the school, and the school itself. Which I think correlates to the security levels that come up later, since it’s a ‘level three’ breach, which means the school was broken into. Was it… always that fucking simple and I just totally glossed over that detail until now? orz

While the newsfolk complain about not getting comments from UA, we get to see the back of a ~mysterious figure~ who definitely isn’t the primary antagonist of the entire series. God, you can see his individual neck vertebrae.

Horrifying.

We transition to 1a’s homeroom, with Aizawa going over the battle training as well as their grades / evaluations. Aizawa calls out Katsuki and tells him to grow up and stop wasting his talent, which Katsuki grudgingly accepts. Izuku jolts at being called out next over his broken arm, and accepts the chastisement of learning to control his quirk, because trying isn’t going to cut it. Aizawa does soften the blow, however, by repeating that Izuku has potential, assuming he overcomes that issue.

With that done, Aizawa ‘Plus Extra™’ Shouta gets the whole class tense by drawing out the next class announcement. While I think it’s a translation error, the whole class sweating as they wonder whether it’s another brutal pop quiz is hella funny. (I’m guessing it was meant to be ‘test’ which would reference to the quirk assessment as well as the battle training, but ah well.) The whole class sighs in relief as one as Aizawa finally reveals that their task for the morning is to choose a class president - a normal, school-like thing in comparison to the past two days.

Pretty much the entire class has their hands raised to volunteer for the position, with Katsuki being particularly aggressive about it (as per the norm). Even Izuku has his hand shyly lifted up from the desk, while his narration notes that the position in normal schools entails mundane tasks, but in UA’s hero course means leading the group - a position suited for a top hero in the making.

Tenya calls for them all to quiet down, drawing attention as he goes on to explain how leading people is a task of heavy responsibility, but that ambition is not equal to ability. He is so intense it’s hilarious as he explains how the office demands the trust of its constituents, and that if it’s to be a democracy, then he puts forward the motion that they choose their leader through election.

Seriously this is just so fucking hilarious, I love this boy so much. And I love whoever it is that calls out that this is a classroom, not congress. 

Tsuyu points out that the class hasn’t known each other long enough to build trust, and Kirishima notes that everyone will vote for themselves. Tenya points out that that is precisely the reason that anyone who gets multiple votes will be the best suited for the job. He then checks with Aizawa if this is allowable, which the teacher agrees to so long as it’s quick. And a quick transition, we reveal the winners-

Izuku with three votes, and Momo with two.

Everyone else, it seems, still has one vote, which was their own (as predicted). Izuku is shook. Katsuki is shaking in anger as he demands to know who the hell voted for Deku. Ochako is whistling and looking away, thinking that she’d better not let Katsuki find out.

(Also of note is that Sero is already approaching Katsuki and making a joke here about it being obvious Katsuki wasn’t one of Izuku’s votes, and then seemingly laughing a bit when Katsuki’s temper turns on him?

Hard to say for sure, but it seems Sero is the first of Katsuki’s future friend group to approach him and get away with poking at his temper. Which I feel is something very much overlooked by the fandom in favor of Kirishima for fairly obvious reasons.)

Tenya, meanwhile, is in a funk as he notes he has no votes, and that that is the harsh reality of office. Momo is concerned as she notes that zero votes meant he voted fro someone else, while Sato points out that Tenya was the one to suggest the election, so what did he seriously want? Izuku and Momo go to the front of the class - Izuku a nervous wreck while Momo’s just exasperated with the situation. Aizawa confirms their positions as he gets out of his sleeping bag, and the class talk a bout about the suitability of the chosen pair while Tenya continues to sulk in his seat.

With that, the first half of the chapter is done, so I’ll call it here. I can certainly say I learned a thing or two today, and I hope y’all did as well!

[five-rivers]

Reflection

Tucker passed in front of a mirror and stopped, did a double take. He'd been doing that a lot, lately, ever since what he and his friends referred to as the 'Egypt incident.' He raised one hand and traced a line under his eye, his lower eyelashes ruffling.

"You checking your eyeliner, Fol-ey?" asked Dash, bumping into him, rudely.

Tucker avoided stabbing himself in the eye and caught himself on the sink. He frowned at the reflection of the jocks in the mirror and scanned the locker room for Danny. Alas, his best friend must still be running punishment laps in the gym.

"Looking for Wimp-ton to save you? That's pretty pathetic," said Dash, jabbing Tucker again.

Tucker spun to face them and started to back away. He wondered if it would be okay to fight back under these circumstances, or if he would get in trouble. Because Tucker could fight. Maybe not as well as Sam and Danny, he was more the tech guy of their group, but all of them could throw a punch. Heck, Tucker could pull back a bow and put an arrow into the center of a target a hundred feet away. That took arm strength.

If he fought Dash, he'd probably win.

But fighting was generally frowned upon at school and with the other jocks as witnesses... Yeah, that wouldn't pan out well. His parents would take his side, but he didn't want to get a bad reputation with the teachers. One of the trio had to stay on their good side. Obviously it couldn't be Danny, and Sam was too argumentative, so it fell to him.

He sighed. Well, he could take a punch, too, if it came to that. He took off his glasses and put them on the back of the sink.

"What're you doing that for?" asked Dash.

"Good glasses are expensive, Dash," said Tucker, flatly, glaring up at the taller boy. "They're also made of glass. I don't want to be wearing them if you decide to hit me in the face."

Dash stared down at him, as though seeing him for the first time. He humphed. "You take all the fun out of it," he complained. "Come on, guys," he said to the other jocks, leading a parade out of the locker room. Tucker sighed and looked back at the mirror.

Eyeliner, huh? Dash probably would have been surprised to find out that Tucker had thought that he'd seen eye makeup on his face. Kohl. No. Not kohl. That was a recent word, and not completely accurate. Mesdemet for the black. Udju for the green. He blinked, unsure where the words had come from.

No, he knew where the words had come from. He just didn't want to think about it.

Danny stumbled into the room, banging the door behind him. "Hi," he said, waving at Tucker. He paused. "Are you okay? You look kind of..." Danny trailed off and shrugged.

"I'm fine," said Tucker. "Just talked my way out of getting beaten up by Dash."

"What, really?" asked Danny, his eyes flickering over Tucker. "Are you sure you're fine? He didn't hit you?"

"Nope. I'm really fine."

He hoped.

.

The archery club met right after school on Tuesdays and Thursdays, regularly, contrasting with the computer club, which met 'whenever' and 'online.' Usually, meetings coincided with Danny getting detention and Sam's activist stuff. Tucker thought of these afternoons as their 'alone time.' Otherwise, they were, well, not quite joined at the hip, but...

It was a near thing.

Tucker wouldn't have minded if Sam and Danny did join the archery club (or the computer club, for that matter), but it could be nice to have some time away, so that he could sort through certain thoughts. Thoughts such as: What was happening to him?

Because he really had thought that he had thrown off the influence of Duulaman's ghost, or that weird staff, or Hotep-Ra, or whatever had been going on that week, and yet, here he was, over a week later, hallucinating himself wearing Egyptian makeup, of all things.

He squared himself on the edge of the archer range and checked that it was clear. The other members of the club were working with the closer targets. Tucker thought that he would challenge himself today. He pulled back.

The thing was, at the end, when Hotep-Ra was gone, and Tucker was back to himself, he had been able to use that staff, the Scarab Scepter, to return everything to normal. He wasn't sure he should have been. He had no idea how that staff worked. Yet, in that moment he had.

And he did look an awful lot like Duulaman.

"You're doing great today, Foley!" called the club advisor from across the range. "Are you sure you don't want to shoot competitively?"

Tucker rolled his eyes. "I'm sure!" Then he caught sight of his arrows. They were all clustered neatly in the bullseye.

The hairs on the back of his neck stood up. Tucker was good. He wasn't, quite, that good. Not at this range. But, in the moment, as he was shooting, he hadn't registered anything as being unusual. He remembered looking at them as he was aiming, so he wasn't just spacing out.

Archery was practiced in Ancient Egypt, wasn't it? He remembered seeing murals. He remembered the sun shining down on his shoulders as his entourage...

... What?

Tucker frowned. This wasn't going to go away, was it?

.

The computer screen cast Tucker's dark bedroom in a blue light. The only sound was him typing away at the keyboard.

Tucker didn't want to worry Danny and Sam. Mostly Danny. He had enough to deal with without worrying that his best friends was going to go crazy and try to kill him. Again.

He cringed. He did not have the best track record when it came to that particular thing. Then again, neither did anyone else close to Danny.

Hence not wanting to worry Danny.

Maybe he should talk to Sam, though. Out of everyone he knew, she was the only one who'd been mind controlled in a similar way. She hadn't said anything about having hallucinations post-Undergrowth, but, then, she wouldn't, would she? Sam had the same reasons Tucker did for keeping quiet.

Tucker made a face at himself. It was probably a sign that their relationship wasn't as healthy as it looked, keeping secrets from each other like this. But... he knew Danny kept secrets. They all did, and they were fine with it. So, Tucker or Sam keeping secrets was fine, too.

As long as it didn't turn into murder attempts. That was not fine.

Tucker slipped his fingers under his glasses to rub his eyes and returned his attention to the screen. He was researching Duulaman, and had dived deep into the academic side of the internet. He'd come up against a dozen paywalls and dismissed them all with a few keystrokes.

Duulaman. Pharaoh of Kemet. A descendant of Hatshepsut and an ancestor of Tutankhamen. He had been a fairly progressive member of his family, restoring several of Hatshepsut's monuments after other of his ancestors had done their best to destroy them, making laws concerning the treatment of slaves and foreigners, and forging peace with neighboring countries. He had been well-liked, his popularity having been attested to even years after his death by inscriptions in other graves, praying that their inhabitants would find themselves under Duulaman's rule in the afterlife. He'd been famed for his athletic and magical abilities.

Sadly, academic publications were as skeptical about magic as they were about ghosts.

Tucker rubbed his eyes again.

Duulaman had been murdered. According to his brother, the pharaoh who had succeeded him, the deed had been done by an advisor whose name and image had been systematically removed from everything.

Probably Hotep-Ra. That fit with the ghost's whole thing, and the fact that Tucker couldn't find any information on him.

After another relatively fruitless hour, Tucker pried himself from the chair and went to bed.

.

He turned the fine silver mirror over in his hands, contemplating its polished surface. It had been a 'gift' from a Mitanni noble, and had carried a brutal curse into the heart of Kemet, but the curse was loose, now, wound around his very soul, and the mirror itself was merely a harmless, empty vessel.

One that Duulaman could learn from. He ran his fingers along the strange symbols scored on the outer edge of the mirror.

If his advisors would stop arguing for just a moment.

"We must attack at once!" said Hotep-Ra. "This insult against the person of god cannot be borne!"

"But it is harvest season," objected another. "We cannot afford to take the men from the fields. There would be famine!"

"Hotep-Ra," said Duulaman, softly, "brother of my heart, it was not even their king that sent this. Would you raze their whole kingdom and force a tragedy on their own for the sake of one man?"

"One who attacked you and our kingdom through dread magics?" asked Hotep-Ra. "Yes, my pharaoh."

"Then perhaps it is good that I am pharaoh. I know that you love me, but I have no desire for war. Even so," he said, raising his voice, "I have sent certain persons to correct the problem, and my brother has borne a letter to the Mitanni king, explaining the situation. It is true that this assault on our kingdom cannot be suffered quietly."

The advisors took that in. Duulaman turned to the Priestess of Mut and tried not to squint. She was just far enough away that he had trouble seeing her. Sadly, none of his magic had yet succeeded in giving him the eyes of a hawk, but he yet had hope.

"What say you about the curse?" he asked.

Duulaman was a powerful priest in his own right, favored by the gods and his ancestors, but he valued other opinions. Being the focus of the curse might have blinded him to certain aspects of its function.

The priestess bowed. "It is as we first feared," she said. "It binds your great soul, so that you may not pass into the green fields of the Duat when it is your time to do so. Instead, it decrees that, when you die, you must suffer to be born into a common line, far from your rightfully exalted place."

"And for Kemet? For my line?"

The priestess, an experienced woman who had served Duulaman's father, actually trembled. "That, whence your second life reaches the age of reason, you shall understand, and you shall see the last of the Pharaohs come to ruin, all our temples abandoned save for nonbelievers, your descendants crushed or cast into obscurity, your name stricken from history, and your tomb robbed by foreigners. She dooms you to watch the slow decay."

This was about what Duulaman had expected. He closed his eyes, pained. If only he had been more careful opening the box... but he had assumed it to be from Hotep-Ra, or his brother, or one of his sisters, for it had been among other, like gifts.

"I see. Fear not. I will take care of it. Kemet shall not fall within our lifetimes."

The relief in the room was palpable. They had faith in Duulaman's power.

Alas, that it might come to naught.

.

Tucker woke with a jolt, hand on his heart. He looked around wildly, relaxing when he saw the acid green numbers on his bedside clock. He was here. He was now. He was Tucker.

And it wasn't even time to wake up for school.

Wait. It was Saturday. He wouldn't have to wake up for school anyway.

Alright. So he might have, thousands of years ago, been Duulaman. Fine. He laid back down, breathing through his nose. He dealt with ghosts on a daily basis. He could deal with reincarnation. This was cool. This was fine.

He was definitely having a crisis.

Crap.

He fumbled for his phone, and hit the speed dial for Danny. Danny never slept anyway, it was fine. Besides, stuff like this was why Sam had bought him a phone (a Nokia brick, because ghost fights) in the first place. Dead people were Danny's specialty.

"What's wrong?" asked Danny, far too alert for the small hours of the morning.

"I think I might be Duulaman," said Tucker.

There was a beat of silence. "Yeah?" said Danny, confused.

"Like, I'm a reincarnation of him or something."

"Yeah?" repeated Danny. "I thought that was the whole reason you could use that staff and stuff?"

"Wait," said Tucker. "You mean, you knew all along, and you didn't say anything?"

"I thought you knew and didn't want to talk about it," said Danny. "I'm sorry. Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm just having weird Kem- Egypt flashbacks. I'm fine."

"Do you want me to fly over?"

"No," said Tucker. "I just- Am I still me?"

"I mean, you're you to begin with. You are yourself. That's like, definitional."

"Yeah, but..." Tucker gestured at his ceiling with his hand, even though Danny couldn't see it.

Danny chuckled. "You're still you, Tucker. I know Sam and I aren't always super sensitive, but... We do pay attention, you know? We'd know if you were being taken over. Maybe not right away, but..."

"Thanks," said Tucker, with only a little bit of sarcasm.

"Hey, I like to think we've all come a long way since the thing with Poindexter."

"True," said Tucker. "Hey, thanks, man. I'm sorry about waking you up."

"Don't worry," said Danny. "You didn't. I'd just caught Boxy when you called."

"Oh. That's good. Get some sleep, Danny."

"You, too. Tell me what Egypt was like tomorrow, okay?"

"Kemet," corrected Tucker. "And, yeah. Bye."

.

"What are you doing?" demanded Hotep-Ra.

Duulaman turned away from his ritual tools and fixed an un-amused eye on Hotep-Ra. "I may have made it your place to question me," said Duulaman, "but I thought I had made my decision on this matter clear. The method your faction proposed is too uncertain, too risky."

"I have made a mirror," said Hotep-Ra, "one that will recognize your soul in whatever body it should take. With it, we could search all of Kemet for you when you are reborn and then lay you properly to rest, as you deserve, before the curse comes to fruition."

"And if I should be born in lands beyond?"

"Then we should look there, too!"

"Starting all sorts of wars on the way, no doubt. Tell me, brother of my heart, what is the difference between the young man who falls in war, whose body is left for the crows, and the old man who is buried peacefully, and who will find joy in the Duat?"

"The devotion of his family!" responded Hotep-Ra instantly.

Duulaman shook his head sadly and looked back to his tools, touching them softly. He had already completed the ritual that would force the curse to carry his soul thousands of years into the future. By the time his next life reached the age of reason, there would be no pharaohs for the curse to affect. And if there were? Well, it would have been a good long time, and the curse would have weakened significantly. Perhaps even to the point of unraveling.

"No, Hotep-Ra. The difference between a tragedy and a happy ending is time. All kingdoms fall. All civilizations fade."

"Not this one."

"Even this one. The only questions are when and how."

"No," said Hotep-Ra. "No. Never!"

Duulaman felt, rather than heard, the scrape of metal against oiled leather and reached for his staff, which lay across from him, on the other side of his ritual. He was too late. He had trusted Hotep-Ra too much, let him get too close, and he felt the bronze knife slide between his ribs. His eyelids fluttered as his hands groped up his chest.

He was dying.

"I will see you, in the next life," he whispered, blood bubbling in his throat.

And then he was gone.

.

It was bright when Tucker woke again.

He felt... oddly calm. It was nice to know that he had succeeded in out-waiting the fall of Pharaonic Egypt, even though the fact that it was gone made his heart shiver.

Well. He pulled his phone over, and texted Danny. I know what it feels like to die, now, he said. Maybe they'd be able to bond over it. Or Danny would give him some coping pointers, since Tucker was pretty sure he'd have at least one breakdown over this. Either one would be good.

He stood up and walked to the bathroom. His reflection stared back, completely normal. No weird eye shadow, no Egyptian clothes, just Tucker and his pajamas.

Behind it stretched miles and miles of sand.

[mysticprofessoralienhumanoid]

Maribat ideas I will probably never write

Now, before we start.

I realize that those may have already been made but I've never seen them and everything here came from my mind. But if you remember the titles, please tell me them or send a link to the stories, I'd love to read them.

This can be whatever ship you want Connorette, Daminette, Cassandra x Marinette, Brucinette... Any ship.

Here I'll refer to them just as the bats or one of the bats, or just choose a random one of them simply because I don't know the exact person that'd fit in the au with Marinette so I'm just leaving it up to you but... yeah.

[And yes, I know I said it could be Connor or Jon or anyone else, and I know they are not part of Batclan but for the lack of better word, just roll with it]

Yes, you can use any of them, but please tag me (i really want to read what you came up with) and include the link to my post so maybe someone else could use any other of these.

And if want to add anything or just brainstorm in the comments I'd love to do it with you, so don't be shy and say what you think (constructive critism only).

Maybe i will update this, but for now feel free to use any of these over 20 (i think at least) ideas I came with in these past 2 weeks cuz i was bored.

And before you start, I'm thinking of making mafia boss! Marinette AU, but i don't know what ship it should be... Suggestions? (Just not the love square please)

Hope you like it.

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Violinist Marinette. The Waynes got invited to a concert in which Mari played a solo. And they're all just enchanted with her talent.

Marinette a Badass Dancer. None of the bats is a dancer in this AU and I don't really have any direction where this would go, but i just had a scene where she kicks their asses even though she doesn't have much (or any) exprience in martial arts. Just her spinning and kicking one of them mid-spin in the face or... somewhere else...

So the scene is a Wayne Gala, right? Jagged Stone dares Marinette to sing a song on a stage (there’s live music band, i guess?). Everyone’s mesmerised by her voice and Jagged can be heard screaming “That’s my niece!” in the backround. I really want her to sing Creep , a cover by Scott Bradlee's Postmodern Jukebox ft. Haley Reinhart or Crazy in Love , also a cover made by Sofia Karlberg, though any other song is fine too

Bats and Marinette in a band. That's it. That's the whole AU.

One of the bats is sitting under a tree, all peacefully and relaxed, but then they look up to see a random girl with dark blue hair (??) just hanging upside down from a branch like an actual freaking bat. She gives them a heart attack.

Another Au with singing Marinette lol. In this one Marinette likes to sing in a park every other day and Damian comes here one day and hears her and is like “wow.”, and since then he comes there everyday in hopes of hearing her sing and getting her number. And maybe Luka or Adrien play while she sings, that’d be cool

Guys, Marinette and the Waynes being neighbours. No, but imagine. Them seeing some girl watering plants every week for a month or two and then not seeing her for a long period of time, and they're kinda worried, but then she's back and they're confused, because where the hell she'd been, the house looked like not used and just where the hell was she? Marinette seeing some... Weird things happening in the Wayne backyard. Balconies being in front of each other, so they're balcony neighbours too (the romance, the fluff, even the angst, guys). Marinette going to them with baked goods and introducing herself as their neighbour. Them going to hers and welcoming her with a basket of Alfred's cooking. 

Jason has to participate in a dating show because he lost a bet and Mari's one of the participants too...

Duke needs a date to a wedding (i don't know whose, your choice) and Marinette's his best friend, so be my fake date to this wedding?

Marinette as Tim's daughter??

The greatest showman AU. (Sibling dickinette. On the trapeze-)

Forget rouges, superheroes and vigilantes. Underground dancers. Because it's what i need, y'all

So in this, WE is a dance company, and Marinette's maybe an intern in a fashion department. One day Dick's going to one of the practice rooms where's been scheduled a meeting with a designer for his costume for the next show. Instead he's met with a girl he sees for the first time, practically flying on the dance floor. Just as he's about to reveal himself the rest comes and it turns out this is the fashion designer and it seems as no one knows she's an amazing dancer too

Teachers AU + Rivals AU = utter chaos. Them teaching the same subject and competing for their class' loves and/or arguing whose close is better. [Bonus points if everyone's thinking they hate each others guts, but they're secretly dating]

Fencers AU - on the same team on different teams, your choice. (And this honestly suits with Kagami too. I'm up for kagami x bat/marinette)

Damian in the park with Mar'i, but he's having trouble, because this kid has so much energy. How?? Just when he thinks he can take a breath, he notices Mar'i has wandered off and is talking to a young woman, so he rushes there and try to apologize, but she says it's no problem at all. Suddenly this gorgeous girl offers him her help. It looks like Mar'i has taken liking to her and he's so tired, so he agrees and for the rest day watches two Mari's play together and falls in love with the older one. Plotwist: this was plan all along. Mar'i is the ultimate wingwoman.

All the Wayne siblings decided to go to one of those haunted houses for a halloween and there's this petite girl who tagged along their group somehow. They didn't expect to see this tiny girl punching the worker dressed as a monster and knocking the daylight out of him. But it was so worth getting kicked out.

Marinette's a ghost and these four men came to her house and apparently they're doing a ghost investigation?? I mean, she was getting a bit lonely and bored, maybe it's time to "gain some friends" (read: scare the living out of them).

Pretty much the above but with bat/s as ghost/s and Marinette as the paranormal investigator with her team (i honestly want one of them to be Kagami, i don't know why). In both you need to decide who's a skeptic and who believes. It's fun, the ghost is trying to scare them off, but they're stubborn.

Sibling dickinette where Marinette calls her older brother everytime she wants to get out of a date and so he pretends to "arrest" her. (And then maybe dick decides to play a matchmaker and sets her up with one of his adoptive siblings)

Marinette as a lawyer. Her going against LexCorps who framed Wayne Enterprises for something. Or maybe Bruce was accused of murder (that he obviously did not commit) and now she has to prove his innocence. I just really want to read about badass lawyer Marinette, guys

Merlin AU. Is there any AUs with Marinette being Merlin and saving Arthur's ass (I honestly think it should be Chloe, no joke)?

Mominette where she adopts Cassandra. I just imagined them going to ballet lessons together and cooking and now I'm soft.

Marinette got dared by her friends to set a trap for the passerby that involved eggs, toy train and glitter and to then to pretend they're her ex and they cheated in her, and Jason had the misfortune to be that passerby. (Yes, this is probably crack lol)

Tim can rap. Marinette can rap. What could go wrong?? (Yes, this is probably crack too)

There's this girl they see every year when to go on trick-or-treating and she always has the most amazing or scariest costumes. But Damian will not go without a fight and so every year they compete over who has the better costume. This year they just so conveniently dressed up as the famous Halloween couple.

Jon is 17 now and it seems as no one is interested in him. He jokingly tells Damian he supects theres a ghost that's in love with him and they keep away any potential lovers from him. He doesn't know how much he's right. Marinette though, is freaking out.

Marinette decided to take a part-time job at a local pool as a life guard. There's a sudden increase in people coming to said pool but also a dramatic increase in people pretending to drown. Conner is one of them.

Marinette plays a therapist to all of the batfam. The amount of the ridiculous problems she had to listen to... She could write a book and she would make millions out of it, she swears.

"Some say "revenge is a dish best served cold.", then i read "revenge is sweet", so i came to conclusion revenge is ice cream." Huh, so that'd explain the sudden disappearance of ice cream in whole Gotham Jason had been hearing about for the past week from Bruce. The question is, what that petite bluenette is planning to do and who is going to be a victim of her ice cream revenge?

Tim had been in coma for a month after the drug bust, and he has just woken up. The first thing he does? He picks up the argument he and Marinette had been having before he's been put into a coma.

The couple at the place Jason had been at, started making out loudly, so he started making loud noises while eating his ice cream. They stopped. And he got this cute barista's phone number when she was walking past him.

Marinette's at the spa when she overhears two guys betting who can eat more slices of cucumber (that were supposed to be put on their eyelids) and she decided to participate. Safe to say they were all banned from all the spas in Gotham

Can i please get Jason/Duke/anyone making up a bedtime story for Marinette after she woke up from a nasty nightmare? I need it

Every morning and night Marinette pretends to be asleep just so she can feel Damian pull her closer, kiss her temple and whisper how much he loves her

Roy listening to Jason complaining about each first encounter of her girlfriend with his siblings and Bruce. Each is more ridiculous than the one before. He listens to it, after he and Marinette had gone through their own weird af first meeting.

Dick was so busy laughing at the bluenette who'd just walked into a post, he ran into the same post minute later. She asked him out... After she finished laughing and telling him karma's a bitch

Dick likes to think he's the reason Jason and Marinette got married. To his last days he will brag about how at his and Kori's wedding Marinette caught the bouquet, tripped and Jay caught her.

Jason asked Marinette on a date to one of the restaurant the WE owned. Then as a test, he told her he couldn't pay for all the expensive dishes they ordered. She took his hand and they ran out of the building. He's convinced he's going to marry her.