#she's in a toxic ex-ship with a woman she left for dead but went all davy jones and is now hunting her across the seas

[droolfang]

my partner reminded me i had this doodle of alba sitting in the margins of something else and i never posted it... problematic milf

[dcvilmade]

do tell us about the confusing end of ha/ylijah

Ok I’m just gonna preface this that I ship Haylijah. I also like Jayley. And I adore Hayley, and of course, Elijah. This isn’t a comparison of these ships, or criticism of the characters. Over all, it’s a comment on the writing.

Also this got super long. I’m so sorry. for anyone who reads this, thank you for your patience.

I’m just gonna jump into when things, to me, get hinky. So, S4, Elijah was captured by the Hollow, stabbed, dying, got his mind shattered and in the pendant. Hayley goes in to find his subconscious, which is hiding deep in his memories. Elijah is hiding in a particularly violent memory, a red door memory, and he’s IN that memory. He doesn’t recognize Hayley, so he attacks her. Hope goes into Elijah’s mind, and and cries out and wakes elijah up. He’s instantly regretful, and everything. Hayley, naturally, is shaken. Doesn’t want to talk to him. This is understandable. She just went through something terrifying, she needs time to process it.

But this is where things, to be, start getting incredibly weird to me. Hayley, after fighting the hollow and her showing Hayley an image of Jackson, later has this speech.

HAYLEY: Jack... I didn't get to say this before, so I need to say it now. You are who I should have wanted. You were right. But I could never manage to give up Elijah. I couldn't walk away. I met him at a time in my life when I was scared, alone. I know that's messed up. I guess I never really... saw what love was supposed to look like. But I don't want that for Hope. I wish she knew you. I wish a lot of things. As for Elijah, I know what he is. I guess I always knew. But I loved him despite it, or maybe because of it. Truth is, I'm a monster, too. We've all done terrible things, Jack. Except for Hope. She's innocent, pure. And I want to make sure she stays that way. I know what I have to do. I just have to be brave enough to do it.

WHICH CONFUSES ME FOR MULTIPLE REASONS:

Hayley married Jackson, and she loved Jackson, and she was utterly devastated by his death. They’re making it out like she left Jackson for Elijah when that simply is not true.

I don’t understand what…. How is leaving Elijah supposed to be good for Hope? What is with this implication that Elijah is bad for Hope.

Before this, Elijah and Hayley were positively ADORABLE. Their scenes at the safehouse early in the season, then Elijah telling Hayley he wanted to start a life with her, and after Elijah suggested that Davina kill him instead of Klaus, Hayley telling him that she needs him and him being surprised.

But okay, I just want to comment on this part too.

 I met him at a time in my life when I was scared, alone. I know that's messed up. I guess I never really... saw what love was supposed to look like. 

This is either implying that Hayley never really loved Elijah (because he definitely loved her) but thought she should, or implied that it’s a toxic relationship? Because it actually is one of the least toxic relationship on TO lol. But it also sounds like… Hayley was with Elijah because she needed him, and now that she doesn’t need him….. Yeah, it’s uh, not a good look. I really don’t know what the writers were trying to do here.

And like, I’m not saying she shouldn’t be upset about what happened, not at all. But it’s all just so???? Confusing.

Then in the next episode, Hayley says this to Rebekah.

HAYLEY: I saw things, Rebekah, in his mind. Not just memories. I saw... his impulse, his natural instincts, and... I think maybe that's who he really is at his core. REBEKAH: And that scared you? You're afraid that Hope will see that side of him? HAYLEY: I worry that she'll see that I'm... okay with it. What am I teaching her if I allow her to grow up in a place where we... trap our enemies in dungeons and retaliate against threats by killing whole neighborhoods? I... I don't want her learning to become that.

Which would be understandable, if she… wasn’t also a murderer? And, more importantly, if KLAUS WASN’T STILL GOING TO BE IN THE PICTURE??? So Elijah is too dangerous, too much of a monster, to be with Hayley because she doesn’t want Hope exposed to that, but Klaus is totally fine to raise his daughter? (as this is before they know about the ritual that they will have to be separated by.) If Hayley truly didn’t want Hope growing up around that, then she shouldn’t have saved the Mikaelsons in s4e1 and then rescue Klaus, but the whole point of that was she wanted hope to have her family. So.... which is it?

IT’S SO FREAKING CONFUSING

ELIJAH: Let me help you. HAYLEY: Don't touch me. ELIJAH: I am on your side. HAYLEY: I should never have brought her back here.

ALSO THIS IS ?????? ‘brought her back here’ uhm, they brought hope there bc she was sick/dying??? If they hadn’t, she’d be dead? It’s just like the writers totally forgot things from THE SAME SEASON

But yeah okay, continuing on. There’s a lot of…. Interactions between hayley and elijah that i genuinely don’t understand. Elijah is CLEARLY going through something. He’s severely traumatised from dying PAINFULLY AND SLOWLY and also HIS MIND SHATTERING. He’s depressed, suffering, and like, so many things he says are clear indicators of this.

Okay so fast forward to S5, which i’m skipping past all the amnesiac elijah stuff cos that’s not really Elijah. Elijah is talking to Declan, Hayley’s boyfriend, after her death.

DECLAN: Ah, who am I kidding? She probably would have turned me down. I was batting way out of my league, and... and she had a hell of a past. ELIJAH: What do you mean? DECLAN: Ah, an ex. He really did a number on her. I could tell she still held a candle for the guy. But when you... you find a woman that... Her smile could end wars, and... she has a heart as big as Ireland... you'd have to be a fool to let her go. You all right? ELIJAH: A smile to end a war. So now you see her face everywhere you go, you hear her voice in your dreams, and you feel the lingering ghost of her touch. You feel responsible. Perhaps if you had known more, you could have done... something. DECLAN: You're him, aren't you? The one that broke her heart.

and

DECLAN: So you're here to mine my pain for your absolution? Do you have any understanding of the damage you caused her? 

SO AGAIN I’M LIKE HUH??? HAYLEY was the one who chose to end things between them? Hayley was the one who made the ‘i need to be strong enough to end it’ speech? The one who was making out like Hope being around Elijah would be a bad thing? They’re making Elijah out to have just... left her? They’re making out like Elijah was a ‘bad guy’ in the relationship, that it’s his fault? He caused her damage?

Hayley’s dead, and in the afterlife with Jackson too. So like, Haylijah aren’t even together in death. Which I’m okay with, it’s just a bit odd from a writing perspective, especially with Hayley’s “if we met in another life” line or w/e it was to amnesiac elijah.

This is why I say the ending of Haylijah was confusing. They built it up all through s1-3, and most of s4 and then let it nose dive into something just,,,, so freaking confusing. And incredibly poorly written.

[justanotherlifeff]

My type of love

Warnings: Reader has yandereish tendencies, mentions of stalking, depressed reader with suicidal tendencies

Before you found your way into the villain league, you wanted to die. Honestly, what good came out of living anyway? You were always a quiet person ever since you were a child, always on the sidelines. Back in middle school, you were that girl who always sat at the corner at the class without being noticed by anyone. You were that one weirdo that no one wanted to talk to. Your parents weren’t bad. Infact, they were quite good. Atleast you thought your family was perfect at that time. Your mother and father seemed to love you. Sure, you were an only child and you were lonely both at home and school but it was all okay. You were happy. That was until your quirk showed up. Your quirk allowed you to give bad luck to anyone you touched with five fingers of your hand. Infact, their luck would be so bad that they would die somehow in the next one hour. You were already the weirdo at school and now, no one wanted to be around you. Saying that you were careful would be an understatement. You didn’t want to hurt others and you separated yourself from society, from your parents. A part of you thought that atleast your parents would try to get back to being involved in your life but that never happened. After all, your quirk killed a few of your classmates when it appeared. However, your desire to keep everyone out of your life came to an end when you fell in love with a guy. You were in Junior high and he was a transfer student. He didn’t judge you and the two of you started dating. That was until you found yourself checking his chat history when he left his phone with you to go to the washroom on a certain date. You knew you were violating his privacy but you just couldn’t help it. Your parents were completely disconnected with your life because of your quirk and you had doubts about why your boyfriend would be any different. Turns out that you were right. He was cheating on you. That one time lead to your downward spiral towards extreme trust issues and insecurities. You had seven breakups in a span of three years. At the end, when you finally turned 18 and your recent ex left you because you couldn’t bring yourself to trust him, you had enough. You believed that your quirk made you unlucky, you believed you weren’t good enough for anyone. Your ex told you that the way you love people was toxic and that was one thing that you didn't believe. Why was it wrong to know exactly where your loved one is at all time? Why was it wrong to know who he's talking to and what he's talking about? Why was it wrong to keep a control on who gets to be his friends and who doesn’t? You never had friends and gave him all your time so why couldn’t he do the same for you? You did all that because you cared so why didn't he understand you?

When he left you, you ran away from home. You were done. You knew that this life wouldn’t give you anything. You just wanted to die in the streets. That's when you came across a 16 year old girl named Himiko Toga on the streets. She was a vigilante and was on the run and let's just say, you touched the police that were chasing her and they died in a car crash immediately. Toga was 2 years younger than you are (you're 18) but she seemed to find the way you love normal. She had an abnormal way of loving people as well. "I don't think it's wrong of you to know everything about your lover, (Y/N)! You're just so cute! I didn’t think I'll ever find someone like me! We can be besties! You know, I like killing people I love!" Toga exclaimed to you. That's when you made your first friend. You were sure that you would stay away from love in fear of rejection or being left until you were taken into the league of villains with your best friend. The burning crimson eyes of the boss caught your attention on the first day. You couldn't help but admire his low drawling voice that was tired of the world because you could relate.

You were always used to being on the sidelines, away from attention but Shigaraki wouldn’t have it. He had an interest in your quirk as it meant like him, you couldn't touch anything with all five fingers. He understood how hard your life must've been and he decided to be kinder to you than the others since you were relatable. He didn’t know what that was doing to your feelings. You were on a high, you couldn't explain how happy it made you. You didn't have the courage to confess to Shigaraki but you knew you'd die for him. You were absolutely smitten and like usual, that wasn’t going to end up well. If Shigaraki thought he had privacy, he was wrong. You made sure that you knew everything about him. You checked his phone when he was busy with games, you had figured out all his passwords of any social media account he had, you followed him everywhere he went to (mostly without him knowing), you even had pictures of him sleeping when you sneaked into his room to get some. Honestly, it was all going well till he decided to recruit another female villain. One who decided that it would be a good idea to hit on Shigaraki.

While Shigaraki did give you more preference over the other members of the villain league, you were always this quiet girl who minded her own business. Honestly, he was intrigued at the begining because you barely shared anything about yourself, almost like you had a double life. He made sure that you weren’t a spy from the heroes by doing some digging but your extreme quietness was something he found odd, specially for someone who was friends with Toga. However, that personality seemed to change drastically when he recruited the villain Killer Queen (Yes, it's a Jojo reference). Shigaraki knew that Killer Queen clearly had a thing for him and while he clearly wasn’t interested in her, he sure was interested in the sudden change of attitude that came over you. Suddenly, you were like a feral cat, ready to pounce on her. You tried to convince Shigaraki to kick her out way too many times and you always threw passive agressive insults and death threats at her. Shigaraki never saw you throw a death threat before and he had to admit it was kinda hot.

The ship had sailed when Killer Queen thought it was a brilliant idea to kiss Shigaraki on the cheek out of nowhere. Infact, even Shigaraki was surprised and disgusted by that. Without a warning, you held her hand, looking at her with a sadistic grin. She was confused at first before realising that all your fingers were touching her. The realisation gave her a heart attack. As the woman laid dead before you and Shigaraki as the two of you were in the bar, Shigaraki looked at you, raising an eyebrow which made you realise that your feelings for him or atleast, your jealousy was obvious. "I couldn't take that... I love you and I hate it when anyone thinks they can take away who I love. I've.... I've let a lot of people walk away from me and I felt guilty about not being good enough but it doesn't matter anymore. I'm not going to let anyone else have you even if you don't want me. I know it's wrong but I can't help it." you muttered, looking away from Shigaraki as tears escaped your eyes. "Who said anything about it being wrong? I just saw a badass girl who has the right to be the player 2 of my life cause she just killed a bitch over me. You're fucking cool and honestly, the way you tried to keep her away was hot." Shigaraki answered with a grin making you look at him, completely shocked.

"You... You don't hate me for killing a member of the league? You don't think the way I love people is wrong?" you stammered, looking at him, awestruck. "Tch... Why the fuck do you think I'm a villain? These normal people, they put labels on things that shouldn’t have labels. You fucking get to love someone in any way you want and no one gets to judge that. They need to suck it up instead of using it as an excuse to run from relationships. Plus, I'm kinda similar. Honestly, I love all the pictures you took of me sleeping. I dunno how you can make even me look good..." Shigaraki answered, making you almost choke on your spit. "You know about the pictures?" you asked with wide eyes. "Yeah. I also know that you check my social media and my phone and that you follow me around everywhere. Seriously, why the fuck do you think I'm the boss of this stupid league?" Shigaraki scoffed as you looked away bashfully. Someone finally understood you... "Do... Do you check my stuff too?" you asked shyly. "Can't say I don't. It's fun to see you obsessing over me." Shigaraki gave you a smug grin. "So... Are we like... dating now?" you asked, twiddling your fingers. "I suppose we are..." Shigaraki answered before pulling you into a kiss, the dead body forgotten.

[another-mexico-oc]

The most used Mexico´ cliches in fanfiction and comics (And surely this can apply to any other OC)

Traducción en Español: AQUÍ

DISCLAIMER:

This post DOES NOT intend to throw shit and attack specific authors or their work, so out of respect we will not mention names. If you have read my other posts you will know that this only has the purpose of entertaining and to give a personal opinion.

Also, this does not intend to be a manual or guide on how to write a good comic or fanfic. It is only a compilation of repetitive elements found throughout these works.

Now, let's continue ...

Hi! How are you doing? I hope you are safe at home, and in case you have to go outside take your precautions.  

I have been in Hetalia's fandom for more than a year, and the Countryhumans' less than a year, and both my cousin and I have seen and read enough material from Mexico's OCs, enough to compile in a list the most popular cliches when reading a fanfic or comic which involves this character. As I said at the beginning, this is not a guide of what to do and what not, but we invite creators to find new ways to tell the same stories (or even new ones) differently and to not fall into the predictable.

( Perhaps it is because in my university career one of my teachers was very demanding with coherent scripts and stories, and that she tended to review them 10 times before giving the approval, that I became very demanding with the creation of stories and characters. But that's my personal issue! )

Sarcastically, this should be called "The clichés that cannot be miss for your Mexico´ story" :

1. The Mexico´OC was created ONLY to be the love interest of another character (the author's favorite):

In the same way, the author´ comics and fanfics will be of the romantic genre, and it will involve his favorite ship (or his various ships if he/she is a multi-shipper). Making a brief conclusion, there are few works in which Mexico stands out as a character, without having the love interest, or the famous harem, as the main plot.

And if you were curious, here is a chart that shows the most used ships in the Hetalia´ case, although in 2020 it may have slight changes:

(Denmark and Norway?! I have never found any fic about them being paired with Mexico)

2. María Sue and Gary Estuardo:

More cliché this could not be. Even when I´m mexican myself, I realize that the representation of my country has received the Mary Sue treatment by the fandom, both in Hetalia and in Countryhumas, and mostly by the latino and mexican community. I already talked about this HERE, but I'll summarize it:

Regardless of whether Mexico is a man or a woman:

- They will be the center of the universe, all the characters will kiss the ground they step on, they will be the most cute person in the world, without flaws, and their greatest virtue will be his or her ethereal beauty that will make everyone to fall in love with them, with just an eye blink.

- It´s never their fault and they will never face the consequences of their actions, e.g. causing WW3. What's even more, he or she is just a poor victim of the evil countries that want to take advantage of his/her territory.

- Having got laid or dating half of the world will not cause them serious consequences or a negative reputation.

- Personality? Oh my, that´s very complicated to write, instead I will narrate how my female Mexico arrived at the restaurant with a dress that highlighted her feminine attributes and how her long and abundant hair made more than one person to sigh; Or how my male Mexico wore tight pants that showed his perfect toned legs, and that when he smiled he made blush every country.

If it was a parody, I'd accept Mexico to be a Mary Sue or a Gary Stu. But usually the authors want you to take the story and the character seriously. So... nope.

3. Plots taken from soap operas, or telenovelas:

Believe it or not, there are authors who have admitted that their Mexico´ fanfics are based on mexican telenovelas. And the worst thing is that telenovelas have the most cliche stories in the world! Think about it, you have a good and humble, but kind of dumb person, who in this case is going to be Mexico, who falls in love with a handsome and rich person, who will obviously be a first world country, but there is someone who wants to finish their romance. You also have forced marriages, fights, misunderstandings, slaps, super dramatic scenes, passionate scenes, cheesy titles...

Mix all this elements together, and you will get:

For comedy purpose, we will be using my OC)

4. The fanfic or comic always, ALWAYS, has to start with a world meeting:

I propose a challenge for you and your friends. Gather together and search for Mexico fanfics, no matter the fandom where you all came from. Take a shot, or put a coin in a jar, for every time the first chapter begins at a meeting.

And almost always it is here where the author builds the romantic story, examples:

“It was a normal day in the boardroom, everyone was arguing while Germany (United Nations if it is a Countryhumans fic) tried in vain to put order and discipline. Only a nation was waiting for a certain person with brown skin and delicate features, to enter through that great door… ”

“Suddenly, a brown skin girl with black and curly hair (Seriously guys, where did you got the idea your average mexican girl has natural curly hair?!) entered the room, and the entire room went silent. Everyone who was there had something to do with that young lady, and seeing her there, turned into a full woman, left them stunned. She was gorgeous.”

Another cliché, but this one can be in any story, is: "Realizing that it was getting late, he got up, took off his pajamas, groomed, combed his hair, and put on his yellow shirt with his ...". There are several ways to start the story without the famous world meeting and the character's morning routine.

5. The harem and love triangles (or any other geometric shape):

This cliché could not be missing either. There are a lot of Mexico x TheWorld´ fanfics. As I said before, I am not against the shipping and the harem of Mexico, each one is free to ship whatever they like, as long as there is respect between the community.

But even when an author wants to focus on a single couple, let's take for example Canada x Mexico, he necesarily has to include USAMex and RusMex as secondary couples, and at some point it gets exhausting and reforces the Mary Sue treatment. It seems that for many authors, Mexico's international relations automatically translate into a “romantic relationship”, and not into a friends or business partners one.

And also, the construction of the relationship it feels sometimes very empty. The author doesn't give time to show how they become a couple or how they found the chemistry in the other. In the third chapter they are already making out!

6. The toxicity:

Oh yeah.

I don't blame this clichá, my cousin and I concluded that healthy relationships are rare in Hetalia and Countryhumans. Practically all countries have one or two flaws that at first sight makes them look toxic. And in Mexico's fanfics and comics, particularly those involving USAMex, the character gets involved in a possessive and codependent relationship.

If Mexico is not a dominant male or a femme fatale, it will be a submissive character who will allow all kinds of abuse. Or in each chapter he or she will doubt about his/her relationship, and will make their partner jealous.

To write a healthy relationship, you must work on the characters' strengths and make them both face their flaws, but instead, the authors take these flaws and make them the basis of the relationship.

7. The party´ chapter in which things get ... heavily crazy:

Okay, so we have our first chapter at the world meeting, where we establish the main couple. Now what we need is the stage for the lovebirds to confess their love ... while being drunk. In many works we will find the countries gathered at a party (usually a Latino party), and the author will narrate all the crazy events that occur, including how Mexico and his sweetheart, will confess their feelings after having taken a few bottles, and sometimes this gets to ...

8. The chapter (or chapters) + 18

This is almost a requirement for many fanfic´ writers, and is always written in the same way. The author will narrate you in detail from the moment they begin to undress until the climax moment.

9. Spain will never stop calling Mexico "New Spain", despite the fact that more than 200 years have passed since the country's independence and its recognition:

And in the case of Hetalia, Mexico must have the same last name as Spain: Hernández Carriedo. Yes, in the same way that United States last name is not Jones, but Kirkland, like its ex-colonizer England; or that Belarus last name is Braginski as his brother Russia, and not Arlovskaya.

Also, although Spain continues to call Mexico "New Spain", he will never call Argentina "Rio de la Plata" or Colombia "New Granada". Similarly, England and France will never call America and Canada "13 Colonies" and "New France" respectively. It seems to be something exclusive for Spain and Mexico.

10. Repetitive references and jokes, or lack of knowledge about the country.

Paco the chihuahua dog, Mexico and Sudamericans fighting over the avocado´s name, Mexico having flashbacks of his/her past with the Aztec Empire and with the USA when they were colonies, Mexico complaining about his/her rulers and corruption within the country, Mexico crying over Texas, Mexico demonstrating his/her beautiful culture to other countries …

Not to mention when someone makes an Mexico OC and his knowledge of the country is very basic: tacos, sombreros, Day of the Dead, always hot climate, the wall issue with America, Aztec and Maya as the only ancestors of Mexico, Texas, burritos... Sorry if I sound rude but, those people need to read and investigate more, and watch less movies where Mexico has that yellow filter.

11. Bad translations

Okay, this is something exclusive of the spanish speaking fandom, but I´ll tell you what´s their issue.

Some author had the brilliant idea to make the dialogues of the countries in their respective languages, followed by placing the Spanish translation in parentheses, and from there many followed suit. The problem is when you notice that they don´t speak or understand the language, and instead they use the Google translator, obtaining results like this:

There have been several occasions when I am reading America and England´ dialogues, and it makes me want to write in the comment section: “DON´T USE THE GOOGLE TRANSLATOR! ” I wouldn´t know what to say from the rest of the countries, since my French is very basic,and I have hardly learned one phrase from the others languages.

My advise for these authors is to find a person who is fluent in the language and who can help them with the dialogues. Or even better, try to avoid this cliché, because at the end of the day people will only read the translation, and it is already implied that each country speaks in its respective language. Also doing this is very pretentious.

The less you can do is to add in the dialogues well know words, like adiós, hola, bonjour, ciao...

12. Changing the canon personalities. Or worse: turn a loved character into a villain.

I already said this HERE too. Basically, for the author to make his Mexico an empathic character and to make other countries to fall in love with him or her, they must conveniently change their canon personalities. This applies more in Hetalia than in Countryhumans, since this last one belongs to the community and nobody can establish what is canon and what is not. On the other hand, in Hetalia the characters already have their own personalities, and neither plays the role of villain. And there is a big difference between being an antagonist or a villain, but I´ll let you to investigate it yourself.  

This cliché is closely related to the Mary Sue treatment, because if I want readers to empathize with Mexico, I must turn another character into an evil person who is going to put him through hardships. And normally this character is the United States or America, whatever you call him.

If I want Russia or Germany to fall in love with Mexico, I must rewrite their characters and throw out the unstable part of Russia, and Germany's little experience regarding romantic relationships, just to make them the most romantic and sentimental people in the world.

✥   ✥   ✥   ✥   ✥   ✥   ✥   ✥

There you have it! I think I already roasted 80% of Mexico fanfiction and fanart, but is not like they are going to dissapear with this post. On the good side, for every time I cringed reading some of these works, I have saved a good amount money, you must try it. I should try an aside blog where I criticize bad fanfiction... But at the moment, that´s all for today! See ya!

[toomuchbroadwayquotes]

This might be ignored,its a long read, but if you want to have your forces restored on feminism my dead feminists i really wanted to share something that is making me tear up every 5 seconds.

As some of you might now, in my country (Brasil) we currently have a situation where our "president" is a misogynist (said he had a bunch of boys, they he went weak and have a daughter that's a "small" example for yall), homophobic ( said he would beat the gay out of his son if he ever "got it"), racist ( talking about killing native Indians and saying slaverism was a choice yadayada) anyways, just a piece of crap, we call him Bozo, like the clown. Well ever since his election we have been feeling so down (I'm sure my American friends can share the feeling). We are the country that kills more transexual people on the world. And it's not even illegal here, that would put into perspective. So, all this are real, serious problems, but bear with me as I get I little... naive maybe?. Well we had 20 seasons of BigBrother over here (Or BBB, Adding the Brasil at the end) and the show is on "the liberals tv channel, all the conservatives try to boycott it yadda yadda ") . But this season is just a gem. I feel like a revolution is happening and (I'm crying rn) I can't even put into words. Its gonna sound ridiculous, but you have to understand that 1) TV is a huge part of our culture, and is 100% connected with politics for us. 2)This show has been silencing woman, making men do anything they want without consequences and put woman as simple objects for their enjoyment. And somehow every year we wouldcomplain about how that was the reflection of our country. Something like this year edition NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE.

Our LGBT movies, Theather and books are being censoreds right now. Our country is on the verge of becoming a conservative doom.

The secretary of health system said :abstinence of sex is the best way to avoid DSTs and pregnancies. THATS HOW DEEP IN SHIT WE ARE. And we feel voiceless. Is like they are the majority you know?

Is like, you know when Katniss made every distric rebel by leading an example on the hunger games? Is THAT KIND OF SHIT. So, firsts things first:

I will introduce you the leaders of our current feminist movement

First, Thelma, she is not just ya regular powerful black queen. She is a doctor, with a bunch of degrees on stuff I can't even pronounce,she is specialized on anesthesia and she is a resident like those bad ass ones in grey's anatomy. She she is A BOSS. She is strong, and even though she is not 100% familiar with the feminism in "theory" she lives it in practice with out even knowing it ( now she knows, cause the other two are teaching her!) I want to make clear that on this reality show, the majority of the public has always been racist, and black people normally are eliminated first, yes it sucks and is one of the reasons I stopped watching a long time ago, as most of us millenials, but thank God we came back. She isn't going ANYWHERE CUZ WE ARE NOT LETTING THAT HAPPEN.

The second one is Marcela, every since the first we saw her she said loud and clear:I AM A FEMINIST, she is also a Doctor. She calls her self doctor unicorn, she is an OB/GYN and choose her career because she wanted to fully support her transexual brother /yess/, she is also expert on female sexuality and give classes about it, think Carina Deluca. She also takes care of sexual abuse victims. Oh yeah, she is bisexual as well. And everyone is shipping her with the next one btw.

Now our last warrior: Gizelly, She is a Lawyer, and she advocates for woman, she has suffered all the types of abuse from her ex husband and after all the trauma, she decided no one would do that to her again. Feminist, we call her the hurricane, she just shoots fire and defends any woman that is being belittled.

What happened was, some guys decided they would "seduce"any woman who was in a relationship outside the reality show, so they would look bad, and be eliminated easily. Wellx those 3 heard that, and they just couldn't get quiet. They went and tell all the girls about it. Some of them didn't believe them, the guys said they were CRAZY, and were LYING (what a shock)

The confrontation scene:

So one of them said: If I am lying, I will be eliminated this round. If I'm back, then you are the lier. So, regular reality show stuff right?

Here are some things you should know: Marcela, the leader ( as she was the one with the initiatives) was anonymous when she first got on the show, and 13 days later, she had 2 MILLION FOLLOWERS. Every feminist, every LGBT+ and ally on this country just woke up ya know?. We were all mad as hell that they were being treated as liars, but, and that's a HUGE but, the guy mentioned earlier was against one that was even worse. He was touching inappropriately the girls while they were completely DRUNK at the parties ( they wouldn't remember later), he was the one who actually made said plan mentioned before, but they didn't knew at the house because he was a completely different person when he was alone with the guys. A complete scumbag, he mocked and made fun of every woman on the house because of their looks etc. Sooo, all those millions of feminists watching were like : "do we take the biggest jerk and make the girls think we think they are lying or ?" Well, we decided to take the bigger toxic monster first, and left the other one for the next. But we had a special card. Every year, after the show starts, they put a glass house in the middle of a mall, with 4 candidates inside, we vote for 2 of them to be on the actual show yada yada. What happened was:people started showing off by the mall, with posters, begging for whomever got in the house to :"PLEASE TELL THE GIRLS EVERYONE BELIEVE THEM. THAT THEY ARE NOT LYING. THAT THEY HAVE MILLIONS OF SUPPORTERS. THAT HE ONLY CAME BACK BECAUSE THE OTHER WAS WORSE ETC"

So, last night was elimination day, the worst one got out with 80% elimination A victory for us (there were 4 people on this run, and one of them is a Black guy, fat, older than everyone else, and by history, he would obviously be the first eliminated but he was the one with LESS VOTES. AGAIN THIS IS UNPRECEDENTED IN OUR COUNTRY SPECIALLY SINC THE FOURTH PERSON COMPETING IS A CARISMATIC YOUNG KOREAN MAGICIAN YOUTUBER WITH A NETWORTH OF MILLIONS, BUT THE BLACK GUY WAS LESS VOTED THAN HIM, GUYS I CAN'T STOP WRITING IN CAPS.The second worst one tho, comeback celebrating, saying he knew he was right. Singing victory. The girls were crashed. No one understood and they all started crying and talking about how it was a reflection of our country, but that they wouldn't change their ideals etc. (Again, they didn't knew everything trash bag number one did, cuz he did it in secret so they thought it was an answer)... well, 2am, the couple from the glass house got in. And they told them. They said everything. How the public loves them, and the why the other one got out first, and how we knew they were saying the truth. This part is just a sweet ending for y'all. They then proceeded to get all the woman in one bedroom and talked and talked, they even explained to the ones who had some deep patriarchal mindset and were believing the boys up until that point, they had conversations about feminism, about not accepting to be treated that way, they cried, they were so relieved, it's silly because is a reality show, but last night everyone felt like we were supported. Like, people got our backs! People agree that we wont take that bullshit anymore. In other editions those guys would be the handsome guys that all the girls would die to be with, you know? But know they are the villains. It happened. The girls are not the crazy ones. They are not the powerless wones. They were the STRONG ONES forming OPINIONS, moving the big pieces on the board.

I can't even talk about how this will impact on many young girls, especially with all those girls having such strong stories you know? Today is a reality show but whatch us on the booting vote! Watch us at the March's. Just watch us. I'm telling y'all. Brasil is gonna turn this shit upside down.

Anyways here is a little clip of when our guardian Angel Dan, told the girls that they should trust Marcela's word

The relief the felt, we all felt. Having your word taken seriously after being called crazy and lier...

( even the production of the show tryied to deny the guys plan was real before the videos started pouring up, and they had to take back after saying on national television that Marcela was lying. Because that was the standard)

[electrakarasu]

❛ she is a knight polishing her amour, carrying her own sword. fighting her own battles. making her own glory. ❜

SIMAY BARLAS? No, that’s actually ELECTRA “LEXI” KARASU. Only TWENTY-ONE years old, this SLYTHERIN alumni works as a CURSE BREAKER and is sided with THE NEUTRALS. SHE identifies as CIS-WOMAN and is a HALFBLOOD who is known to be ARROGANT, SCRUTINISING, and DETACHED but also CLEVER, DETERMINED, and ENTERPRISING.

links: stats, pinterest character parallels: jane villanueva ( jane the virgin ), jessica huang ( fresh off the boat ), valencia perez ( crazy ex-girlfriend ), lu ( elite ), lucifer morningstar ( lucifer ), annalise keating ( how to get away with murder )

ELECTRA KARASU : ON HER LIFE

tulip karasu never did have an off-switch. she danced through life like it was a party, she broke every rule the world set out for her and she made reckless decisions with the fury of someone who was so sure of what they were doing. was she so sure that sleeping with a man twice her age, a man who had a wife, was the right thing to do? maybe not. but she did it anyway.

antigone, tulip’s first child, was six years old when tulip gave birth to electra. electra. another name from an old greek play tulip had only half understood. people tried to warn her that naming your child after a woman who attempts to murder her mother was bad luck, but tulip refused to listen — she liked that it sounded alive, crackling with intensity.

one week after electra was born and seven months after she had left christopher harris, tulip reached out to the married man to let him know of the birth of his daughter. christopher, being the ceo of a well-respected company in london, was absolutely mortified and agreed to pay a generous portion of child support if tulip didn’t tell anyone who was the father of her daughter — especially not his wife. he arranged to have the money transfer out of an account his wife could not see, set it to wire to tulip once a month and then never spoke to her again. tulip didn’t much mind — she was on to her next affair anyway.

and so electra was born into a world of chaos, a world without rules or order. tulip wasn’t much of a mother, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t kind — it just meant that as electra grew up, as her smarts began to build, she had to learn how to raise herself. she changed her name to lexi when she was just six, finding the name electra to be too stormy, too out-dated for a girl such as herself, and with that she formed the first step to navigating the world on her own, separate from her mother, from ‘ electra ’.

you see, lexi was something of a prodigy in every sense of the word. she was intelligent and cunning and emotionally mature, showing skills far beyond her age range from the time she could walk. she was nothing like her wild mother or her scruffy older sibling — she had the genes of her father, and from a young age she knew she could build an EMPIRE on that. she understood that she was better. she embraced it. she scolded her mother and her sibling, she corrected her teacher with a squeaky little voice, and by the time she was ready to be shipped off the hogwarts, she knew she was the best of the best.

and so she proved it. having been sorted into slytherin exactly thirteen seconds after the hat had found her head, lexi thrived both academically and socially. within months she was top of her class, she was the most popular girl in her grade and she knew, oh she knew she had the world wrapped around her little finger. this self-importance only grew as she flew through each year, passing every subject with flying colours and proving herself to be one of the brightest and most talented witches the school had seen in years. she finished on a high when she was elected her years head girl, and promised to stay in contact with everyone after graduation. ( spoiler alert: she didn’t. )

leaving hogwarts, lexi knew exactly what she wanted to do with her life. anywhere she went, they’d be lucky to have her, and in fact the ministry had tried to recruit her in any capacity, but she refused, telling them outright that she wouldn’t align herself with a corrupt organisation running over with power-hungry white males. she instead headed straight for gringotts, slotting in easily with the dangerous and fast-paced job of a curse breaker. she would travel the world and learn new languages and collect priceless treasure. within months she was trusted, she proved herself to be worthy of the dangerous title and she wears it with great pride.

ELECTRA KARASU : ON THE WAR

lexi wasn’t daft — she’d always known that some people looked at her differently, as if she were tainted, not worthy of the numerous titles that were being thrown at her. and she knew what it was rooted in, too — for years people would try to undermine her achievements because she had muggle blood, because she wasn’t as pure in her magic as, say, her housemates at hogwarts. and she knew that simmering hate could only last so long before it burst — so she knew what was here when the war finally arrived.

just because lexi is a halfblood, does not mean she is about to storm the streets with signs painted in large letters campaigning for MUGGLE RIGHTS. she thinks it’s ridiculous she should be seen as lesser than, of course, but she’s no fool — war is toxic. no side can claim innocence because anyone who participated in nameless violence, something this war requires, is corrupt. she sees right through the orders facade of innocence and believes them to be just as reckless and one-sided as the death eater’s. she refuses to join, to participate in something that is so clearly below her. let them fight — they can’t touch her, anyway. she’s smarter than any of them, quicker than any spell that can be thrown her way. she can defend herself without a cult.

perhaps subconsciously — though she would never admit it — lexi doesn’t care for the war either because she doesn’t particularly care for muggles. after all, the one muggle that always comes to mind for her is her father. and she hates that man more than she hates anyone else on this earth. her father, power-hungry and drowning in his white privilege, thriving off his success and not giving a fucking damn about anyone other than himself. not even his wife. christopher disgusts lexi, and she is vehemently in agreement with him on one thing — they will never meet.

ELECTRA KARASU : ON FAMILY

despite any apathy that lexi might try and push when it comes to her mother and her sibling, lexi would do anything for her little family. especially antigone — certainly not a role model, nor a particularly good older sibling, but a force and someone lexi would defend until the ends of the earth.

from a young age, lexi had to take on a leadership role in her family — the only one with realistic, practical common sense, the little girl keeping her family from blowing up the earth. she’s very good at it, too, with the emotional maturity to keep it together, but sometimes she can’t help but resent tulip and antigone for leaving it up to her to pick up the pieces. tulip is supposed to be a mother. antigone is supposed to be older. and yet both of them can’t seem to hold it together long enough to stay sane when lexi is gone. sometimes she wonders how they’re even alive, but she’ll do it. her job. her job to keep them together. she might not love it, but she’d rather be caught dead then see her family crash and burn.

lexi is incredibly protective over antigone and so had her doubts when antigone decided to push themselves into the spotlight. they’re obviously talented and incredibly good at what they do, but lexi worries about what might happen should antigone be caught slipping up. after all, they’re all in the spotlight now, no matter how small. lexi isn’t a fan of fame, and she’s certainly not a fan of how antigone deals with their success. throwing your money away and screaming political opinions on stage is certainly no way for a sensible adult to behave. she’ll support her siblings career, always, but of course she’ll worry — and worry she did when antigone disappeared.

to say that lexi nearly lost it when antigone disappeared and returned as a vampire would be an understatement. she was so overwhelmed with grief when they were gone, and then when they returned to live a new truth — lexi could barely handle it. she is so worried about how antigone is handling things, whether they’re dealing with this appropriately and whether or not they’re keeping safe. of course, she got somewhat of an answer when they announced their vampirism live on stage for the world to hear after the announcement of the new creature registry — clearly they are not keeping safe. and lexi doesn’t know how much longer she can keep her sibling truly safe before they get themselves killed — really killed.

ELECTRA KARASU : THE REST

born in 2002, lexi is the absolute epitome of a gen z kid. she’s still not over vine’s death, she’s over dramatic and sarcastic and has a very dry sense of humour. and of course her wardrobe is a complete mess. ( check out her pinterest for more wardrobe inspo. )

obviously incredibly self-important when it comes to her smarts and her skills with a wand, but is also equally aware of just how beautiful she is. she doesn’t exactly strive to accentuate anything in particular, but she knows that eyes are on her almost constantly, and while sometimes she revels in it, other times she gets frustrated and wishes people ( men, in particular ) would see her for more than her looks.

she’s pansexual but very, very tired of men. any man talks and she instantly turns into the eye roll emoji. men exhaust her! she’s attracted to them but at what cost!

multilingual! she says it’s part of the job, but honestly she’s known italian and french since she was 12 and it’s not even necessary to speak the languages of the places she travels. it’s just another way to challenge her brain.

[selkiewife]

My Theon Centric Pairings: A Game of Multishipping

So I keep getting tagged to list my 10 ships from 10 different fandoms or 5 OTPs from 5 different fandoms. But the problem is I don’t really have any hardcore ships in any other fandoms- So, I made this instead. A detailed explanation no one asked for of all my Theon ships. (I may be Multishipping trash- but at least i’ll always have my OTC, Theon Greyjoy)

My Joint OTP (yeah I said it): Throbb and Theonsa

Well you guys know that I have totally gone down the rabbit hole of Theon ships BUT- I have developed an OTP (or TTP- Two True Pairings) and that is Throbb and Theonsa. Shipping BOTH Throbb and Theonsa seems to make an incredible amount of sense to me- because Robb, so tragically, IS dead… (cries forever) and I see Theonsa as a natural progression from Throbb. Both Sansa and Theon loved Robb and idealized him in a way. However, when it comes down to it, I think Sansa and Theon have much more in common with each other. And so I think the Theonsa ship is beautiful because in loving each other they can learn to forgive things about themselves since they are so similar and have been in such similar situations.

Throbb (Most Tragic Ship/ also my “across time and space they will always find each other” Ship)

(gif by @bericdondarrion)

This one hurts the most because of the death and betrayal the guilt and the tragedy of it all. But it remains one of the most beautiful ships of all time in my humble opinion. I also feel like there is often echos of Throbb in all the other Theon ships I am into.

Theonsa (The Most Hopeful Ship)

(gif by @greengableslover)

This ship is so pure and beautiful and I hope that they end up together. I really do. They are my endgame ship. This is also the ship that first brought me to Tumblr. Theonsa trash 5ever (as the kids say)

Theyne (Sweetest Ship of All Time)

(gif by @lochiels)

So yes this is the purest sweetest ship of perhaps all time. I love Theyne. The reason I love Jeyne so much with Theon is because she is the only one in the books or show who sees him as Theon- not as Reek or a Turncoat. Not someone to distrust or fear or be disgusted by. Just Theon- that handsome boy she used to watch in the practice yard. It is her complete genuine acceptance of him that I believe helps him reclaim his true identify

oops.. I guess that was Three True Pairings… Okay so you’ve read my Big Three ships that I think should could be canon. Come under the cut to follow me deep into the rabbit hole of Theon Shipping

My “We Could Have Had it ALLLLLLLLL” Ship: 

Greythorn

I’ve always thought that Theon and Margaery could TEAR IT UP as a couple. I don’t think she would have wanted to marry him because of her ambition but they could have been amazing lovers- or just BUDS. They both are called out for smirking and smiling- they could have shared the slyest of smiles you guys! She could have soothed his self doubt and he’d have definitely benefited from her strategic mind. And it would have been interesting to see her in a non-politically motivated relationship. I mean seriously, if you don’t want to see the king and queen of sass take over Westeros then I just have to ask, what is wrong with you??  Even Alfie agrees

My “I will go down with this ship” Ship:

Theolyn (of course)

Well, if you follow me you know that every Thursday I talk about how much I LOVE this ship. It is total crack and I admit it- but Catelyn and Theon have a lot of parallels and I just LOVE the idea of Catelyn, who has always done her duty, having this torrid love affair with gallant slut pirate, Theon Greyjoy. It’s just such an interesting dynamic to explore- and I just love the older woman/ younger man thing. Plus Theon has a thing for MILFs in book canon. Wasn’t the first woman he slept with married with a child? And the miller’s wife… And he was even more attracted to Asha (pretending to be Esgred) when she lied and said she was with child. Mothers just turn him on. It is known.  

My “I Wish I Could Quit You” Ship: 

Greysnow

(gif by @asbraveasrobb)

Oh man, this would be such an intense and passionate love/hate kind of ship. The characters have so many parallels and similarities. Both outcasts, both known as “turncloaks” in the book. Both have heavy resurrection themes in their storyline- but they are also complete opposites in many ways- which would make this an incredibly dynamic ship. I just hope Greysnow gets more love after their big confrontation in Season 7 (and I hope the scene evolves Brokeback style with punches being thrown and wrestling because they just can’t DEAL with the love they feel for each other, and then all of a sudden they are making out…. Well, a girl can dream anyway, right?)

My Two True BroTPs: 

Thasha/ Theyara 

Seriously, I would watch an entire series of just these two! They have such an incredible bond- especially after not having the opportunity to grow up together and having such an messed up reunion (largely due to Yara/Asha let’s be honest.) Being with Yara is the only thing that made Theon punking out on The Dream Team okay for me lol. And when people say that Yara is going to die in the show or Asha in the books- that is NOT OKAY people- because I need these two together forever as power siblings. I need it for my SOUL. 

(gif by @5by5brittana)

Thyrion

(gif by @princegrisejoie)

Okay so who doesn’t want to watch these two get drunk and talk about their appalling childhoods? Seriously Tyrion and Theon have so much in common. Before everything went down, they could have been drinking and brothel buddies. Now after everything they have gone through, I think they could be incredibly close allies and friends. I think they could help each other in so many ways. I know that their interactions with each other hasn’t gone very well up to this point, BUT! Has anyone noticed that Tyrion is the only character who acknowledges how fucked up Theon’s situation with the Starks was? And he also acknowledges how that must have effected him growing up. I think there is much more understanding to be found in this  relationship and I will never give up hope for this BroTP becoming a reality. 

My Dream Team:

Brienne, Pod, Sansa, and Theon

Like, do I even need to say anything about this guys? I was SO PUMPED when Brienne + Pod ex machina rode in to save the day- and for a brief, BRIEF moment of time (curse you D&D, curse you!) we had this incredible dream team. They are the dream team that got away you guys… *cries

My OT3 (The Angsty Threesome you had no idea you wanted)

GreyStoneSnow

 top gif by @stephenarkley , bottom gif by @baelerion

Okay, I am only half serious about this but oh, I can’t even with these three- there are so many parallels within their stories, they all have such chemistry with each other, they are the embodiment of Tyrion’s “cripples, bastards, and broken things.” And seven hells, the HUGS! THE HUGS!! Is there any trio of characters who can give better hugs? The answer is no. No one gives better hugs than these three. Come for the dragons, Stay for the hugs (and GreyStoneSnow) ;)

***** Honorable Mentions *****

Most Fucked up Ship: Thramsay*

(gif by @tehnazzy)

*I don’t think I can rightfully call this one of my ships since it makes me feel like curling up into a catatonic ball in the corner of my room and never coming out. I really don’t want them together AT ALL- BUT… it is still an incredibly fascinating ship because thinking about it reveals a lot about both Theon and Ramsay… And this incredibly toxic, intensely disturbing, stockholm syndrome ship has also inspired some really illuminating and psychological Theon meta and fanfic. Reformed by DoubleBit is a really brilliant modern AU fic about the psychology of their relationship (which bonus, also has Throbb and Greysnow it in!) So even though I do not technically ship them- I do find it very interesting to think about.

“Swamp Trash and Squid Boy”  (Theera || Theon x Meera Reed)

This ship is entirely blamed on the beautiful RPs of @ladyoftheneck and @slysmiles / @drownedandflayed-archived-deact Check out some of their lines- they are adorable together, trust me. 

Thegritte (Theon x Ygritte) 

And this ship is blamed on the lovely RPs of @theredheadwildling-deactivated2 and @slysmiles / @drownedandflayed-archived-deact and also on this great fanfic, Iron and Flint by VagrantWriter Ygritte and Theon actually share a lot of cultural similarities and they challenge each other in very interesting ways.

Thod

(gifs by @iheartgot)

Last but definitely not least, I give you Thod. Again, this ship is blamed on someone- @lordhellebore for her beautiful fic, Don’t do so well alone. I’m not sure if Thod is necessarily her intention- the fic seems to be more about the beautiful beautiful friendship developing between The Dream Team and a wonderful psychological portrayal of Theon’s struggle and journey from Reek to Theon (which of course didn’t end when he saved Sansa.) But the fic does depict Pod caring for Theon and even singing to him at one point. My heart! And when you think about it- Theon is Pod’s Knight in tattered rags shining armor. And could you IMAGINE- this ship, Pod and post Reek Theon. It would be so PURE

Well thanks for going on this journey of shipping madness with me- in retrospect, I feel like I should have just typed:

There Ain’t Nobody I Won’t Ship Theon With

and left it at that. 

[kishamontgomery]

Seaturtles & Penguins

Screams echo off the dirty iron walls of the ship, blood stained the floors in large, rotting puddles that slid sluggishly across the lower deck as the waves rocked the boat, sometimes finding the drainage pipes and dripping down into even lower decks of the ship. Pipes above them dripped fluids he hoped was water and pent up steam from time to time. He shifted his body slightly and heard the chains grind against the pipes above him. He knew the sound well enough that he didn’t flinch any more. He tried opening his right eye but the dried blood made it difficult. He forced his seafoam coloured iris open and hissed as the cut reopened and blood blinded him. He shut his eye again and steadied his breathing trying to ignore the continuous thumping noise that seemed to steadily grow louder. He clenched his teeth as he lifted his head to see how many of his companions were left. He counted four out of the original fifty socks before one of the masked men opened the large metal door and descended down the grated steps, his boots matching the beat of that terrible thumping noise that was threatening to deafen him.

He let his head fall forward not wanting to be his subject of interest. His heart started to pick up pace, the vibrations starting to make his whole body pulse. Sweat beaded on his temple and trickled down his face. He shut his mouth tight and watched as the heavy boots passed him and stopped right next to him. No.. not Kazimir-… He thought as he risked a glance towards his Czech friend, who was unshackled and dropped to the deck with a sickening thud. His seemingly lifeless brown eyes widened as he started to be dragged off to a side room, in which he could only imagine his friend would be slaughtered. Kazimir’s desperate screams for help echo around him clashing terribly with the thumping that filled his ears. His cries were silenced when the heavy door was locked behind him. The clang of the metal door sent a jolt through him and  his eyes shot open, he sat straight up in his bed his heart pounding in his ears.

Sam panted and pushed his sweaty hair out of his eyes, his rough hands becoming damp. His heart was beating spastically the same thumping rhythm he heard in that damned nightmare. The same nightmare that always bubbles and brews in the back of his head, lingering and ready to engulf him. He took a deep breath and looked over to Reneè who was still sleeping peacefully. He didn’t dare touch her. He pushed away the quickly cooling sheets, climbed out of bed, and buried his hands in his drying hair, clenching his fingers and pulling the sandy blonde strands, holding back a soft cry. That dream! Kazimir. He reached up and rubbed the seashell turtle that hung around his neck. His breathing eventually calmed, the only thing left of the horror that still haunted him was the occasional twitch of the scar that marred his face, starting from just above his right eye, narrowly missing it, going down his cheek and finally ending below his chin next to his windpipe. A very close encounter with death.

Sam’s eyes eventually found the alarm clock on his side of the bed and he sighed, the toxic green numbers told him it was a quarter to four. There was no way he was getting back to sleep and it was almost time for him to get up anyway. He grabbed a towel and his clothes for the day before heading off to the shower to wash away the sweat and the terror. Sam always risked waking Reneè or her parents when he was up this early but if he was to pay them back for their hospitality he was going to have to wake up this early for the next couple months at least to make it to the cafe that he worked for in the morning. He’d work up until noon then make his way to the daycare and stay until 6 before finally reaching the bar he tended. Out of the three, the bar definitely had higher pay. He tended the bar while the runway was occupied by some of the most beautiful women he’d ever seen, along with a fair amount of drag queens that populated the establishment and continuously flirted and lounged around; he didn’t like the job all that much but it’s what was needed.

Cold water cascaded down his body and he took in a sharp breath, cold showers were nice, especially after those nightmares. The white tile glinted off the overhead light that brightened the bathroom. For the first couple months he was afraid to even turn on the lights, not wanting to wake his fiance. After several nasty falls he started putting a towel under the crack of the door just in case. Sam scrubbed the shampoo into his hair and closed his eyes as the white bubbles were washed away only leaving their scent behind. He shut off the water glancing at his arm as it pushed the foggy blue curtain back, the tattooed sea turtle shone against his tanned skin. The scars started at his wrists and scored his skin to his ankles. Forty percent of his skin was scar tissue. That was one thing he remembered the doctors saying. He stepped out of the shower and into the humid bathroom. He wrapped a dark green towel around his waist, the towel had been been used so much that the fluffiness was completely gone and left behind an almost scratchy texture.

Sam dried his dripping body and slipped on a dark blue long sleeved shirt and a pair of jeans. All his outfits consisted of long sleeved shirts and pants. Last time he’d worn a t-shirt he got wary looks and Reneè refused to hold his hand or even acknowledge him in public claiming that his scars were disgusting and drew to much attention to them. The ex-marine slid his shoes on and grabbed his wallet that held his name tags before he walked downstairs as quietly as he could. He placed his 3 paychecks on the counter for Renee’s parents. They hated that Sam kept paying them but he was inclined to. The kind couple kept him off the streets and fed. He left the house and started his 3 mile walk to the cafe. It was still dark out and he started thinking about Renee. When did she change? When he’d first met her she had bushy brown hair and thick round glasses. She had dropped her books and Sam stopped to help her. He’d just came from Hawaii where he lived up to that point, but everyone around him died he needed to get away from there.

She was so sweet and timid, reluctantly accepting his invitation to coffee, and they just hit it off from there, but when he came back from the P.O.W camp she’d changed so much. Her hair blonde and straight, no more glasses or big sweaters. Those were replaced with contacts and tight shirts or dresses. The worst part about everything was that her personality had done a complete 180… She snapped and stung with a venomous tongue. She was so mean. So unlike herself, but Sam still loved her and hoped that one day the Renee that he knew would come back..

He walked along the dark streets with his eyes on the sidewalk in front of him, kicking the dried leaves that littered the concrete ahead of him and piled on the sides of the streets. He heard the slapping of tennis shoes against the pavement in front of him. He pulled his eyes away from the dead leaves and to the woman jogging towards him, her big dog leashed at her side. He gave her a short nod and they both went on their way, he saw her every morning but never said anything. Just a nod, she was probably married and he respected women’s boundaries. His eyes moved to the sidewalk again and didn’t lift from there until he stopped at the last crosswalk before the cafe. He pressed the cold metal button that was connected to the tall pole. A deep monotonous voice told him to wait to cross. Sam looked across the street both ways then to his cheap watch. He had 5 minutes before he had to clock in .

The early hours were the busiest at the little cafe, mostly older people who came in everyday for their coffee and little bowl of oatmeal. He knew them all by name and always spoke with them about anything they liked, when they weren’t busy of course, there was a Vietnam veteran that came in and ordered black coffee and a bran muffin every morning and would sit there and talk to anyone who would listen about the war and how the government was out to get all the veterans and that Sam needed to watch his back,

“Former marines are who they’re going for first!” that what he always said.

There was a couple that came in everyday, their 65th anniversary was a couple weeks back and they both dressed up for their breakfast date. The woman, Ellie, always got a mocha and a couple pieces of cinnamon toast. Her husband, Robert, got black coffee on the weekdays and tea on the weekends. They were so pleasant to watch, holding hands and talking to each other almost like no one else mattered. Sam tried and tried to imagine him and Reneè like that, so in love and growing old together but no matter how hard he tried, how much he hoped for it. It was always fuzzy…

The morning went by rather quickly and uneventfully. It was noon when he left saying goodbye to his co-workers. He stepped outside into the brisk air and took a quick breath in, the cold nipped at his skin and he folded his arms rubbing them and trying to bring the warmth back into his body. His next job wasn’t to far away and he was excited. He loved those little kids. They didn’t judge him, they only got angry when he wasn’t playing with them, which wasn’t very often. He smiled at the thought of the kids and hoped that one day that he and Renee would have a family. Sam walked through the front doors of the daycare and greeted the receptionist as he walked through the tall baby gate that kept the children in, he was hardly able to put on his apron before the kids started to crawl all over him.

Sam sat on the floor with a couple kids lying on his legs a few others clinging to his arms and more hanging off his neck wanting to hear a story, the kids went on and on about his stories from when he lived in Hawaii. Their favourite was about the big old shark that lived in the bay that he and his friend had named Fred. He started telling the story of how he and his best friend had attempted to touch Fred. As he spoke a little girl started playing with his hair, pulling at it and twisting it into a ponytail and he let her do as she pleased. Another kid came over and put a macaroni necklace around his neck. He smiled and thanked the little boy before holding him in his lap and continuing the story.

“I don’t feel like you should be employing men that scare the children!” Sam heard a woman ranting at the front desk as he was trying to convince the children to let him go, he needed to get to his next job. Some kids were crying and the others were begging him to stay. He kneeled down and promised that he’d return the next day and play with them but only if they stopped crying. Just as he finished his back up, a girl named Janie, walked in and distracted them with snacks and Sam mouthed his thanks before sliding out of sight from the children and to the front desk where the woman was still ranting.

“Do you see him!?” the angry woman pointed at Sam and looked at him angrily

“That scar is a big reason why he needs to go!” The hawaiian bit the inside of his cheek and looked at the receptionist who was desperately trying to defend him.

“H-He’s not a bad guy! The kids love him.. He got that scar fighting for our country!” The receptionist was getting increasingly angry. Sam pulled his eyes away from the fighting women when he felt a tug on his jeans and he looked down to see a newer little girl trying to get his attention. That must be her mother… He thought and crouched down to be eye level with her and tilted his head

“Did you need something?” He asked softly his voice kind and gentle. The little blonde girl sniffled and shook her head before she started crying and wrapped her little chubby arms around his neck and cried. His eyes widened and he asked what was wrong

“I’m not scared of you! Mama is being mean but she doesn’t mean it!” She was scared of being somewhere new. He looked up at the woman who stood there with her mouth open, stopped mid sentence. His eyes focused on the clock just behind the woman's short blonde hair and gasped before gently picking up the girl and handing her to her mother.

“I’m sorry but i have to go, i’m going to be late for my shift at the drag bar!” he said exasperated as he dashed out the door not registering what he’d just said. He ran the 4 miles it took to get there, thanking his military training that he was able to do this without passing out when he burst through the back door of the bar. He panted heavily and tried to apologize in between huge breaths of much needed air. His manager just shook his head and tossed him his black blazer and told him to get out to the bar. He nodded and jogged out gasping as he nearly slipped on a puddle of water. He grabbed the edge of the counter and steadied himself before standing and started making drinks for the people lined up and silently reminding himself to clean up the puddle when he had a moment, the dripping brought back the dream from that morning. Those dripping pipes. Rotting puddles.

Sam was brought back to attention when someone tapped on the counter in front of him. He took a sharp breath in and shook the flashback from his head and looked up to see who pulled him away from the nightmare. His breath caught in his throat as he looked up to see a dream. He stared at the girl in front of him, she was beautiful. No doubt one of the pageant girls. She narrowed her chocolate eyes as she looked up at the dumbstruck marine. Her beautiful asian eyes slowly made their way from his neck to the top of his head and she covered her mouth with a cute little giggle as she pointed to Sam’s hair.

“I like that” the asian said softly, her words were accented and she spoke slowly as if she was unsure of her English. The girl then pointed to his neck and her smile widened

“That too.” Sam managed to tear his eyes away from her enchanting gaze and reached up to feel his hair which was still tied up in a tiny ragged ponytail and his expression shifted to one of embarrassment as he pulled the little plastic hair band away and tossed it into the garbage, instantly going to the macaroni necklace and took it off, stuffing it into his pocket.

“I-I’m sorry i work with kids” he tried to explain, silently cursing his stutter. The girl waved away his apology and gave him another dazzling smile. He took in a steady and reassuring breath before asking if she wanted a drink. The girl parted her lips to answer but was cut off before the first syllable could pass her lips.

“Shannon! You’re on in ten minutes!” A man shouted from behind the stage

“Make up girl! You need your make up! You’re killing me!” He added emphasising by ‘hanging’ himself with the measuring tape that rested on his shoulders before disappearing. The girl, Shannon, smiled and rolled her eyes before turning back to the blonde.

“Duty calls, see you ‘round… Sam” She smiled and glanced to his name tag before giving a little wave before making her way back. While other men were lost in the sway of her hips, Sam was bemused by her eyes. He turned away from the counter his heart feeling lighter than air and elated. He stepped towards a shelf and slipped on that fiendish puddle.

Sam looked up at the clock that hung above the bar and sighed as he slung the moistened towel across his shoulder. The bar was cleaned and the drunks were being shooed out the door. Sam threw the towel in the water bucket behind the door that led to the back of the bar. He perked up hearing one of the waiters calling for help to get a particularly stubborn man out the door. Once the man was officially clear out Sam waved good bye to the waiter and went to hang up his blazer. In the silence of the bar he heard someone crying backstage, his eyebrows furrowed and he went to investigate. He pushed back the door and blinked in surprise seeing Shannon sitting with her legs under her and crying into her hands. Sam dropped down with wide eyes and spoke softly.

“Shannon..?” he asked trying her name. The girl looked up with a gasp then hid herself by burying her face in his chest and wrapping her arms around his shoulders nearly knocking him off balance, he put a hesitant hand on her back and spoke softly trying to calm her shuddering sobs. She moved away after a matter of minutes, her face streaked with make up. The Asian girl looked away from him hiding the right side of her face. Sam’s eyes narrowed as he gently reached out and moved her chin to look to the right, she resisted for a split second then let him turn her head. Her black hair fell against her face, falling out of the blue butterfly pin that held it up. Sam’s eyes widened at what he saw.

A dark bruise blossomed across her cheek in the shape of a large hand. Fury boiled in his chest, who would dare to this to a girl?!

“Who did this…?” He asked his voice still and calm, he didn’t want to scare the girl even more than she already was. She shook her head the blue tinted strands covered her eyes.

“I don’t want to talk about it…” Her broken voice wavered as she started crying again. Sam hushed her and helped Shannon stand, she wobbled and he looked down with widened eyes. She was still wearing heels, of course. The ex marine steadied her and let the girl lean on him as they walked towards the front door, he grabbed his coat and draped it around Shannon’s tiny, shaking shoulders.

“Do you have a car?” He asked softly and looked down at her with soft eyes which saddened at her words.

“I walk home.. It’s not far..” Shannon whispered and looked around the empty bar nervously, like she was looking for someone. He tightened his grip on her shoulders slightly feeling protective over the smaller girl. Sam asked where she lived and was surprised to find that it was at least two miles away.

“Shannon, let me walk you home. Please. I don’t want you to get hurt again.” His eyes were worried and his voice tight. She shook her head at first then paused, eventually nodding her approval. Sam wasn’t worried about Renee saying anything about him showing up late, she was probably out still working. So many late shifts. She was rarely there when he got home and her side of the bed was empty when he woke up. He tried keeping his mind away from that. She loved him… Right..? They didn’t talk as they walked together, he kept his eyes in front of them making sure the path was free of harm. They arrived at the apartment complex that was on the outskirts of Chinatown. Shannon stopped at the alleyway right before the door of a chinese restaurant and she turned to look up with a small, sweet smile. Her brown eyes met Sam’s seafoam ones and he returned the smile bashfully.

“Thank you for walking me home” She said softly and glanced to the ground in girlish embarrassment. He closed his eyes with another nervous smile as he reached up and scratched the back of his head.

“You’re welcome..” he said hold back his nervous laughter and shifted his weight from his left to his right foot.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” Shannon gave a short bow and disappeared up the fire escape and gave the man a short wave before retreating into the apartment through an open window and his heart danced. He turned and started to walk home with a pep in his step.

Shannon flopped on her bed in a fit of giggles, her cheeks glowing pink with a blush. Sam was such a gentleman!! She wiggled excitedly before she convinced herself to stand and take a shower to wash away the makeup from her face. She stepped out of the shower and looked at her face in the bathroom mirror, no more make up. She looked like who she really was. Someone she could never show Sam. Shannon stepped out of the bathroom and walked into her room pulling on her pyjamas, flinching as she heard her parents simultaneously screech her name.

“Shui!” Biting her lip the pageant girl padded down the stairs to the main floor that doubled as a restaurant to face her angry parents. Her name ‘from the water’ 从水 Cóng Shuǐ… She hated it. They glared at the clothes that hung on her body. It wasn’t that feminine.. Blue with little white polka dots. She shifted under their gaze and cast her eyes to the ground. Her father took a deep breath before he started his rant. His fists raised, clenching and unclenching. She was disgracing the family name.. She was supposed to carry the ‘Pei’ honor, their family line. The chinese blinked away her tears and bit her pretty little lip. She shook her head and dashed upstairs sobbing harshly pulling on an overcoat and a pair of flats before escaping out the window once again. She hated them. She hated herself. She hated this stupid male body she was trapped in!

Sam arrived home late, he glanced at his watch. Two thirty am. He sighed softly he’d have to get up in an hour and a half, maybe he should just stay up.. He looked at his and Renee’s shared window and froze momentarily. Their light was on.. HIs eyes narrowed as he opened the main door and walked quietly inside. His eyebrows furrowed as he stepped up the stairs his breath slowed as he listened ahead. Their door was opened slightly and a sliver of light sliced through the darkness. He reached the top of the stairs and stiffened hearing Renee’s voice and in that instant his heart broke.

“Jacob, I’m pregnant…” he heard her whisper and tears brimmed his eyes as he stormed forward and opened the door. He stood and stared at the pair in bed, quickly covering themselves up with the sheets. Renee’s gray eyes widened seeing Sam and she tried to speak. The ex marine shook his head and turned away and left. Ignoring her calls for him. He needed to get out, clear his head. He didn’t want to do something that he would regret. He left the house and started to walk down the street with no destination in mind. Rage blinded him as he folded his arms eyes just ahead of him. He paid no attention to his surroundings and ran right into someone knocking the smaller body to the ground.

His eyes widened as he was brought back to attention. He looked down immediately offering his hand to the fallen figure.

“Shannon?!” he gasped and helped the girl up apologizing

“What are you doing out? It’s super late!” he asked his hands worrying at her shoulders. She shook her head and and hiccuped through her tears. Shannon attached herself to Sam, wrapping her arms around his torso and burying his face in his chest, her tiny hands grabbing the back of his shirt and bundling it up in her fists. Sam stood awkwardly and put his rough, calloused hands around her shoulders. She said nothing and Sam gently moved her away and looked at her.

“I’m taking you home..”  He said softly and she hesitantly nodded. Sam rubbed her shoulders a bit before they started walking back towards the girl’s apartment. The air was tense around them and silent, Sam’s mind always went back to what he saw in the bedroom. He couldn’t shake them. Shannon looked up at him with soft knowing eyes.

“Sam.. are you ok?” She asked softly and stopped the other’s walking by grabbing his arm. The blonde stopped and looked down at the girl tears brimming his eyes.

“My fiance has been cheating on me with-” he started but was stopped when he heard Renee shouting from down the sidewalk.

“Oh! I see how it is! You leave me to go hook up with some prostitute?!” She shrieked and stomped up to them. Sam didn’t have a chance to respond as Shannon squared her shoulders with an angry expression.

“Prostitute?” She asked then growled

“Prostitute!?” The chinese screeched

“Who the hell do you think you are?! You’ve been cheating on him for God knows how long and you have the nerve to come after him! I wouldn’t blame him for trying to find better company!” Shannon glared at the other woman and turned away .

“Come on Sam.” Sam was pulled away from the dumbfounded woman and towards her apartment.

After that night Sam never went back to stay with Renee again. He was able to stay at a cheap hotel as he saved up for an apartment, he and Shannon had gotten closer and closer until they became inseparable. Every night at the bar Shannon would sit on the stools and they would laugh about dumb little things. Three months they’d kept this up and every second Sam felt himself falling deeper in love with the girl. Every night he tried to summon the courage to ask the girl out on a date. Every night he’d stutter and the words died on his lips.

Sam reached to Shannon’s side and grabbed a dirty glass, his white sleeve hitching up his wrist flashing a glimpse of his sea turtle tattoo. The chinese squealed and Sam nearly dropped the glass, fumbling and catching it at the last second. He looked at the girl with a confused expression which turned to panic as she reached over and pulled up his sleeve. Afraid she’d see his scars Sam tried pulling away but Shannon was stronger than she looked.

“Ohmigod! I didn’t know you  had a tattoo! And of a turtle! I LOVE turtles” she gushed and giggled softly not saying a word about the scars that surrounded the turtle. Sam couldn’t help but to smile and nod, he loved the way she spoke so freely with him. An idea sparked in his head and it must’ve shown, Shannon looked at the other quizzically and narrowed her chocolate eyes.

“Hey, S-Shannon..?” He asked cursing his slight stutter. The girl looked up and tilted her head

“Do you..maybe want to .. oh i don’t know.. You don’t have to.. Maybe want to go to the aquarium with me..? Maybe.. You don’t have to…” He whispered a dark blush dusting his cheeks, he glanced away from the girl unable to look her in the eyes if she turned him down. Shannon was silent for a long time. Sam risked a glance to the girl who had had big, fat tears rolling down her cheeks. The hawaiian’s eyes widened and he stepped away from her worried that he’d said something wrong. He didn’t get to far away from her and he gasped softly as her arms wrapped around his neck.

“It took you long enough!” She giggled and nuzzled against his cheek her body halfway across the bar causing his manager to snap at him.

“Sam! NO touching the girls!” The man folded his arms and glared at Sam who raised his hands in defense.

“No, sir I-I’m not-” His stuttering was cut off by Shannon who looked up at the man.

“It’s ok cuz he’s my boyfriend!” She giggled excitedly causing the bar manager to only shake his head and tell Sam to get back to work.

The two weren’t able to go on their aquarium trip for another couple weeks due to their conflicting schedules, Sam always busy with work and Shannon trying to get away from the pageants. Fall was starting to settle in, the leaves were turning wonderful arrays of reds, oranges and browns. It was beautiful, but not as beautiful as the chinese girl standing by a light post in a flowing high-low sundress, a pair of wedges on her feet making her taller than usual the top of her head only reaching his shoulders. Sam smiled to himself and adjust the sleeves to his white button up. The girl brightened seeing Sam and walked up to him almost skipping, so excited for their date.

The only other time they’d had together was when Shannon showed up at the cafe he worked at, she’d buy a coffee and stand next to the counter waiting for Sam to finally be on break so she could wrap her arms around him and hum happily, she had tried to kiss the tall man twice but both times he pulled back with a scared glint in his eyes. He remembered whenever he tried to kiss Renee she would turn away with a look of disgust telling him that she could feel the scar that marred his skin and it was disgusting. He didn’t want Shannon to feel the same way.

Shannon wasted no time getting to the aquarium, she started walking almost instantly, after giving Sam a quick hug. Sam laughed softly and reached down to take her hand gently and her face lit up like a child who was given candy. She squeezed his hand gently and giggled, she loved the feeling of Sam’s rough, calloused hands against her soft, dainty fingers. It didn’t take to long for them to make it to the front doors of the aquarium. Shannon was almost vibrating in excitement. Sam laughed softly and squeezed her hand to try and get her to calm down, once inside he let her loose in the gift shop while he walked up to the receptionist and bought their admission and a couple cups of fish food. He thanked and went to go find his overly excited girlfriend.

“Sam!!” The man heard Shannon squealed and he panicked and ran around the multitudes of stuffed animals and figurines trying to find the Chinese. Once he found the he let out a relieved breath he wasn’t aware he was holding in. The girl was bouncing up and down holding a giant stuffed animal penguin.

“It’s so cuuute!!” she gushed and smiled up at the man who chuckled and held out the cup.

“We can feed the fish.” he said and Shannon lost all interest in the turtle with a squeal as she thanked him over and over again. Immediately attaching herself to his arm and dragging him towards the opening of the exhibits instantly gushing over the fish, saying hello to each and everyone of the aquatic creatures happiness glittering in her big eyes. Sam stayed quiet and let her pull him around to every tank until they got to the sea turtle enclosure. Shannon stood frozen at the entrance her hands quickly going to cover her mouth as tears rolled down her cheeks. Sam looked down at the girl and his eyes narrowed slightly.

“Shannon..?” he asked softly and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. The younger girl nodded and gave a broken giggle.

“I’m just so happy!” she said with a soft voice. She looked up at him and bit her lower lip.

“Hey Sam..?” she asked and glanced away, the man looked down at her with a raised brow.

“C..Can you call me Shui? It’s my real name..” She said timidly and shifted her weight from one foot to another. Sam’s eyes widened and he nodded.

“Yes, yes. I’m sorry Sha- Shui..” He said softly blushing faintly. The girl then threw her arms around his neck and held him close thanking him softly.

“All you had to do was ask” He pointed out and Shui could hardly hold herself back, she wanted to kiss him so badly, but he was still scared..

“Can we go see the jellies?!” She asked her attention pulled away from the turtles. He looked at the room that led off the sea turtle room. It glowed a light purple and blue changing every couple of seconds. Sam nodded and let the chinese lead him into the room. His blue eyes widened slightly seeing that the room was empty. Shui led him to the middle of the room her eyes not focused on the jellyfish at all. She looked up at Sam was her big chocolate eyes. Sam’s heart started doing somersaults and threatened to beat right out of his chest. Shui’s expectant eyes started to flutter closed. His heart was racing. What was he going to do?! He didn’t want to have the girl find him repulsive. That scar. The one Renee always always hated. He took a deep breath and squared his shoulders trying to be brave. She wasn’t Renee.. She was different.. Her face was tilted up already she was ready. Sam took a deep breath and leaned forward to press his lips to Shui’s gently. Barely brushing her rosy lips and quickly pulled away with a dark blush looking away from her face.

Shui opened her eyes when Sam pulled away and pouted obviously not satisfied with she got. The girl stood on her tiptoes and pulled Sam down to kiss him roughly. His eyes flew open wide but Shui wouldn’t let go so he quickly calmed himself and kissed her back his mind going immediately going to his scar hoping and almost praying that Shui wouldn’t be disgusted, and little did he know that Shui felt the exact opposite, she loved the feeling of his scar against her lips it was unique.. It was Sam.. All Sam.. Shui pulled away from the taller man and smiled up at him taking deep and unsteady breaths. She looked ecstatic. She said nothing and pulled him out of the jellyfish room to look at the rest of the exhibits.

At the end of the day Sam and Shui sat at a table inside the restaurant that the aquarium owned. Ironically it served mostly seafood. They talked about the different things they saw that day with little laughs and smiles. They were nearly finished when Sam finally gathered the courage to ask Shui something that had been weighing heavily on his mind all day.

“Shui..i.. I um.. Can i ask you something?” he questioned his eyes darting around. Shui’s eyes widened. A proposal?! So early! What a dream! She nodded quickly and the man bit his lip.

“Well...I uh.. I got that apartment and i..i was w..wondering if you wanted.. You know.. Move in with me?” He asked a dark red blush painting his face. Her face fell.

“Sam..I can’t.. My parents..” She whispered sounding heartbroken. Sam chewed his lower lip.

“Y..You’re 18 right..? You don’t have t..to stay with them..” He whispered and she jumped up.

“That’s right!! This isn’t China!” she gasped and nodded

“Yes! Please, Sam I would LOVE to move in with you!” she giggled and bounced up and down taking the piece of paper that Sam wrote the address of the apartment on.

“I’m going to tell my parents, you go and get it two person ready!” She gushed and kissed him quickly and waved at goodbye and ran out the door and back home. Sam sat wide eyed at the table and blinked. He paid the waitress and left with a little smile on his face. He loved her.

Shui ran down the block and into her house and pulled her parents into the kitchen and giggled happily telling them about Sam and how he wanted her to move in with him, in rapid Chinese. The girls parents stood there in disbelief. A boy.

“A boy!” They screeched in disbelief and her father lurched forward and grabbed her by her hair and yanked her upstairs towards her room yelling at him about disgracing him and the Pei family name. Calling her such ghastly names, she was stopping and screaming for him to stop, to let her go. The older man threw the girl into her room growling. He kept yelling at her his fists striking her.

“You don’t deserve to hold the Pei name!” he snarled and yanked her up to him and took scissors to her hair cutting it so short. Shorter than it’s ever been.. Her mother pulled the clothes out of her closet and ripped them up throwing her shoes into a garbage bag. She threw a pair of her older brother’s clothes at her and ripped the yellow sundress off her forcing her to change before pointing to the door.

“Get out and never come back.” She snapped and she ran out tears streaming down her face. She ran to the address on the paper and managed to get the the door. Number 4. She collapsed outside and faintly knocked.

Sam heard the faint knock and walked to the door pulling it open and his eyes widened.

“Shui! What happened!” He gasped and picked her up and set her on the couch worrying at her wounds muttering to himself and wondering what happened. Who did this. Why?

“God… I’m terrible.. What kind of boyfriend isn’t there when his girlfriend needs him?!” He growled to himself. Shui cried and threw her arms around his neck and whimpered.

“Sam.. I’ve been lying to you.. I-I’m not who you think i am..” She paused so scared with how he might react. Sam looked at her and narrowed.

“What is it..?” He asked his heart tightening

“I..I’m not a girl...I’m a boy…” He whimpered and looked up at the. Please still love me.. Sam froze and his eyes widened.

“Not a girl..?” He asked and stepped away starting to feel sick. Shui nodded and Sam’s eyes narrowed

“Get out.”