#sirius raising harry

[causereyna-artie]

Idk why, but when I think of Sirius parenting Harry, all I see is Sirius and Harry getting really close and laughing together, and then toddler Harry calls Sirius, 'papa', and all of sudden Sirius is on his knees with pictures of James and Lily, begging Harry to remember.

[oxydiane]

'Now, Sirius, I think we can calm –'

'Don't!' Sirius interrupts the older man abruptly. 'Don't 'Sirius' me, I am not here as one of your old students or a member of the Order. I am here as a guardian who is demanding to know why the fuck you let my eleven-year-old on a jinxed broom.'

'I think there's been a misunderstanding here, what happened –'

'What happened –' Dumbledore's words are cut short yet again. 'Is I came all the way here from London to see my Godson play his first game on the house team and ended up with at least three new grey hairs because somebody cursed his racing broom! The racing broom I got him when he made the team.'

'I think your hair is as lovely as ever,'

'Shut the hell up! I want to know how that happened, how you let it happen and why the one responsible hasn't been found and kicked out of here, as far from Harry as possible!'

'You see... There were some... complications.'

'I'll show you complications!' Sirius' hands come down heavy on Dumbledore's office desk. 'You promised he would be safe here, and I trusted you not because I actually do trust, but because you are supposed to be the most powerful wizard alive, and you don't want to make me your enemy.' The venom is thick in his words.

'I promise you Harry is as safe as he could be.'

'Well, make it safer. I don't care how safe you think this place here is because Harry, the – the last good thing that's left in my life,' Dumbledore doesn't miss the quick way emotion seeps through Sirius' voice and face. It disappears as rapidly as it came. 'Harry could have died today, right in front of my eyes, and I will not have that. You understand me? Not even if I have to hunt down that person myself and take the entire castle down as I do. Do you understand?'

'Yes, I do.' His tone is anything but mocking.

Right before turning around and leaving the room, the door slammed as he left, Sirius bellows 'Good. Nobody, NOBODY, curses my Godson! If you mess with Harry, you mess with me, and you do not want to mess with me!'

[weird-obsessed-girl]

Harry dealing with abuse trauma/people finding out about Dursley’s treatment

Ok so I didn’t know exactly how to word this particular genre of Harry Potter fanfiction, but I have been reading some fanfics where either the teachers, Sirius or the golden trio find out that Harry has been abused by the Dursley’s and how Harry deals or heals from that trauma. #cupboardreveal

so therefore below is a list of fanfics that deal with this topic, this is pretty obvious but TW for child abuse, some of these I haven’t read yet so i don’t think any of them feature active abuse, more so past abuse.

All of these will be angst but many with a hopeful/happy ending. Organised by word count. If you would like some fic recs that don’t focus on Harrys abuse here’s the link to my master list Harry Potter Fic Rec (mostly Drarry)

How Each Weasley Found Out About The Dursleys - burnthebodiesandbedonewithit

What it says on the tin, Harry/Ginny (very light tho), protective Weasleys | G | 1k

Food For Thought - LoveHP

Snape notices some things throughout the years, have not read yet so IDK | T | 1.2k

Bottle It Up - mallfacee

Disabled Harry, Severitus, hurt/comfort, hiding medical issues, apart of a series | T | 2.1k

Aftermath - CreateImagineWrite

Post-final battle, Harry is dealing with trauma, Ron helps him and finds out, Trigger Warning for food issues and trauma responses | G | 3.1k

Disguised as something else - aloneintherain

Everybody lives, au war ends early, Wolfstar custody of Harry, hurt/comfort, THIS IS SO GOOD #cupboard reveal | T | 3.1k

Muggle Management - LadyWinterlight, NerdyKat

Hermione recognises the signs of abuse, part of a series, Hermione finessing the muggle system | G | 3.4K

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell - IamShadow21

Not focused on past abuse but is mentioned, Ron and Harry friendship through the years | T | 3.7K

The Cupboard - GreenEyesGreySkies

Drarry, panic attack, harmless prank that turns out to not be so | T | 4K

Bruised Hearts and Painted Skin - mikimouze16

Lupin, McGonagall and Snape find out, therapy, depression | G | 4.4K

Cascade - taradiane

Drarry, post-Hogwarts, Harry has nightmares, discussion about the Dursleys | PG | 4.7k

Claustrophobic- Annie1025

Summer at Spinner’s End, sevitus, 5th year, hurt/comfort, panic attacks | T | 4.8k

Where the Sunbeams Start - zedpm

Sirius/Severus, Soulmate au which leads to Severus getting Sirius freed, then they adopt Harry! T | 7.1k

Locked Cupboards - Lomonaaeren

Redemption, Draco is assigned to guard Dudley, Dudley talks about their childhood | T | 7.2k

Darker Than You Think - Lomonaaeren

Drarry, Draco is very much a psycho, bent on revenge, dubious consent | M (definitely should be E) | 7.8k

Fac Mihi Viam - MistressKat

Canon divergence, Harry stays at Grimmauld Plac, abuse not necessarily discussed but implied, Wolfstar | T | 7.9k

The Uncle - copprbadge

Wolfstar, gangsters au, Remus saves Harry from Dursley’s | T | 7.9k

Tugging Sleeves - Windschild178

Harry isn’t responding to Rons letters, POV Ron, Ron to the rescue | G | 8.1k

Harry Potter And The Summer At Grimmauld Place - Silver_Queen_DoS

What it says on the tin, Sirius is free, home renovation, book 3 | G | 8.6k

Listen - Marchling

Need to sign into Ao3, Sirius spies on Dursleys, hurt/comfort, misunderstandings, reconciliation | T | 10.9k

Finite Incantatem - skullcandy11

Rogue spell hits Harry and reveals some truths, manipulative Dumbledore, Harry joins the dark side | T | 12.3k currently, ongoing

Scars - pheonixgirl26

Some Gryffindor’s see some of Harry’s scar, and decide to help | M | 12.5k

Timeshare - astolat

Honestly i have not read this yet but it looks promising, Harry is spending summer at the Dursleys and then the Malfoy’s | M | 14.1k

Seven Plus One - ABlackRaven

Sirius adopts Harry, 7 times Sirius is called uncle and 1 time he’s called dad, Peter caught, hurt/comfort | T | 15.4K

What’s Left Unsaid - angel74

Post-Order of the Phoenix, Hermione and Ron look into Harry’s life at the Dursley’s, angst, hurt/comfort | T | 16.1k

A Hero - Celebony

Dudley begins to see his family in a different light | T | 18.1k

The Lioness - Aya_Diefair

Molly becomes suspicious of Harry’s relatives, she visits them, BAMF Molly, Sirius is freed | G | 18.3k

That’s Your Punishment? - slytherclaw7

Molly actually asks Harry questions, this is definitely a fix-it fic, Sirius is freed, Peter is caught, Dumbledore bashing, Tonks family taking Harry in | IDK how fanfiction.net ratings work | 19k

Pinky Promise - etymolodrarry, huffinglepuff

Remus is observant, angst with happy ending, Dumbledore bashing, implied self harm, Wolfstar | T | 19.5k

Listen Now - mrsfizzle

Harry confides in Remus, hurt/comfort, Wolfstar adopts Harry, moving into Grimmauld | G | 21.2k

Conquering the Dark - noeon (noe)

Healer!Harry and neuromagic!Draco, both work together, unearths trauma | E | 23.7k

The Chamber of Secrets and Half the Adults are Idiots - Des98

Apart of a series, Drarry, Harry recognises Lucius’ treatment of Draco, fix-it, inter-house friendships | M | 42.8k

The Article - LeeASherlook

outed by the Daily Prophet (not in the gay sense), 6th year, Drarry friendship | T | 43k ongoing

Burnt - lastcrazyhorn

Disabled Harry, Slytherin!Harry, have not read so refer to tags | T | 104.9k

Memories and Dreams - paganaidd

Series, one part Dudley’s POV | T | 140.3k

Malfoy Family Values - belana, Merry1978

This only really mentions Harry’s mistreatment but i thought it is an interesting fic to possibly explore, Malfoys adopt little Harry | G | 141.7k

Stronger At the Broken Places - enigmaticblue

More so focus’ on Sirius’ trauma, but it’s a whole Wolfstar family affair | T | 174.9k

Digging for the Bones - paganaidd

Hogwarts starts screening students for abuse, Snape conducts Harry’s screening, Snape is Harry’s bio dad, Severitus | M | 212.2k

The secret language of plants - Endrina

Severus/Remus, Sev rescues toddler Harry, this is a series of Severus/Remus being Harry’s parents, pre-Hogwarts to post, future Drarry | rating varies | 373k

Innocent - MarauderLover7

Ok so this does not focus on Harry’s abuse but Sirius gets freed and raises Harry when he’s 8 | M | 487.5k

A Year Like None Other - aspeninthesunlight

Disability, slightly Severitus, 6th year, canon divergence, Snape forces Harry to read letter from Dursleys | T | 789.5k

[a-sunset-outside-my-window]

fic rec friday

Things that are not covered in the absolutely USELESS parenting books that Sirius Black, recently freed from Azkaban and new guardian of Harry James Potter, bought in a recent panic:

- How to balance parenting and wooing the hot Dark Magic Exterminator from Lupin & Co that you hired to clear out your parents’ creepy townhouse

- How to convince your five-year-old that the basilisk, boggart and ghoul you planted in the house so said hot exterminator would have to keep coming back are not, in fact, his new best friends

- How to walk your child’s pet basilisk (when you inevitably fail).

Today fic by OptimisticDinosaur is absolutely just vibes and happy thoughts! It's a very fluffy one-shot fic with a tiny sequel and it's so lovely.

Favourite tropes included are:

•Remus Lupin never went to Hogwarts

•Harry is beeing raised by Sirius

•idiots falling in love

•Harry gets a snake!!

I feel like this fic is me making up for the somewhat angsty fics I have recommended lately, so do with that what you will.

As always, give lots of love and kudos to the author and have an amazing rest of the week.

[sliebman10]

Duck

"Want to feed the ducks, Harry?" Sirius asked, as they walked through the park. The little boy nodded and pointed at the group of ducks waiting expectantly in a small pond.

"Ducks!" Harry exclaimed, letting go of Sirius's hand and running toward the pond. The ducks flapped in surprise and scattered. Harry stopped short, bumping into another kid and knocking him down. The other kid started to cry. 

Sirius caught up with Harry and looked around. "Harry, you can't run away from me like that," he admonished, gently. He could still hear the other kid crying. Taking Harry's hand firmly, he approached the kid and his father. 

"I'm so sorry," Sirius said. "Is he alright?"

The other parent looked up from where he was crouching in front of his son and gave a warm smile. "No harm done. Teddy was just surprised."

"Ok," Sirius said. He couldn't help staring at the other man, whose gaze made his insides tighten.

He stood up and offered his hand to Sirius. "Remus Lupin. This is Teddy."

Sirius shook his hand, and said, "Sirius Black…and Harry."

"Pleasure to meet you. Hopefully the ducks come back."

@wolfstarmicrofic

[swiftiereg]

The Black Brothers raising Harry is the air I breathe.

[neongreenllama]

sirius giving harry the sex ed he was lacking at hogwarts and being VERY thourough about it because he doesn't want him to be as confused as they were when they were younger or for harry to get someone accidentally pregnant like his father before him. harry hates every second of it but it's for his own good

[in-flvx]

Gilmore girls au, in which Sirius ran away at 16. 16 years later, he grieves his best friends, and, despite making enough money to support himself and his godson, to make sure Harry's future is as bright as it can be, he has to ask walburga and Orion for money.

[writer-of-sorts]

written with @wolfstarmicrofic prompt: adventure

Remus walked into Grimmauld Palace’s backyard to see a massive dirt hole in the grass —the grass he had just mowed that morning.

“Harry,” he called gently, eye twitching as he approached the child.

Harry was perched on the hole’s edge, grinning down at the enthusiastically digging dog below.

“What’s happening here?” Remus asked.

“Paddy and me are having an adventure!” Harry looked up with twinkling, mischievous eyes. “We’re looking for ancient treasure.”

“What?!” Sirius cried from the bottom of the hole, suddenly red-cheeked and panting in his human form, “You told me there was a buried bone here!”

word count: 99

[impishtubist]

Sirius adopting Harry post-POA is excellent, but Sirius getting his name cleared post-SS or post-COS can be god-tier content. Imagine Sirius rocking up to Privet Drive in his finest clothes, newly-freed and looking his usual handsome self after a month in St. Mungo’s, dripping in wealth, expecting to impress the hell out of his godson (so that Harry will decide to come stay with him of course.)

And then this little scrappy child with the messy hair and broken glasses is so unimpressed by him. He just kind of looks Sirius up and down, goes “yeah? well I murdered my DADA professor who was actually the dark lord, so.” and Sirius is not prepared.

[oxydiane]

The first time Harry unwraps a birthday present that doesn’t make him want to cry after uttering a tight lipped ‘thank you’ he is nine.

He is turning nine and not waking up in the cupboard under the stairs. He is turning nine and doesn’t have to watch over Dudley’s bacon on the stove and bite his lip as he watches Aunt Petunia scoop a much more abundant portion of eggs in his cousin’s plate. He is turning nine and the carefully wrapped box in front of him is much bigger than anything he had been allowed to keep in his cupboard.

Sirius Black sits in front of him, a nervous smile on his face.

It seemed to be a default for his godfather, Harry thinks. That’s the same nervous smile he had sported when he showed up at Privet Drive announcing he was taking Harry away.

Harry had hidden behind the door, then, quietly listening to Sirius explain his name had recently been cleared and he was Harry’s rightful guardian. He used a lot of big words, explaining carefully as if he had prepared a speech ahead, as if he had got ready for a fight.

He doesn’t need to fight anyone, the Dursleys are all-too-eager to give him away.

Harry packs all his belongings in record time, there hadn’t been much anyways, and he walks out of Privet Drive, number 4 hand in hand with his godfather.

He walks out of Privet Drive, number 4 for the last time and that had felt like a dream come true already.

‘So? Aren’t you going to open it?’ Sirius asks, pushing the gift towards Harry.

Harry nods. ‘Thank you.’

‘No need to thank me already, you haven’t even opened it,’

Harry blinks, confused. Aunt Petunia didn’t like it when he wouldn’t thank them for each thing he was given, from Dudley’s worn out socks to the broken clothes hanger he had unwrapped on his sixth birthday. But Sirius wasn’t Aunt Petunia.

He scratches the tape on the side of the box, careful not to ruin the wrapping,

A surprised sigh escapes his mouth when he sees what looks like a box of LEGOs. It was a big box too, and he knew LEGOs were expensive. But after a second look he realises that it had nothing to do with the bright red toys Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon would buy Dudley, because the pictures on this box moved and bright gold letters spelled out ‘Build Your Own Quidditch Pitch!’

‘I didn’t really know what you’d like,’ Sirius speaks to fill in the silence, he scratches the back of his head with one hand looking rather bashful. ‘I know you probably don’t know much about Quidditch, but your dad loved it, so I thought—‘

‘My dad loved it?’ Harry bites his tongue when he realises he’s interrupted his godfather. He didn’t want him to be annoyed or mad at him but the mention of his dad, and to know what he loved—

‘Yeah, his room used to be full of these gimmicks,’ he says fondly and Harry breathes a sigh of relief, because Sirius wasn’t mad he had interrupted him.

He looks back down at the box, the golden letters and moving figures flying all over the cover. His dad used to love this? He was holding something that his dad used to love.

He doesn’t notice it, the way tears start welling up his eyes, at least not until Sirius stands up looking alarmed.

‘Shi— I’m sorry, I’m sorry, you don’t like this? It’s okay, we can go out and you can choose anything you want as a special birthday treat, okay? We can throw this away—‘

‘No!’ Harry is shocked by how loud his voice is. His arms wrap protectively around the big box on the table and he shakes his head violently. ‘I love it!’

Sirius seems to calm down at once, and Harry feels his hand gently rest against his head and twist his hair.

‘Alright, I’m happy you liked it, sprong,’

‘Loved it!’ Harry insists, eyes still wet.

‘I’m happy you loved it.’

Harry relishes in the soft touch, something he was still trying to get accustomed to.

He was nine years old, and he got a birthday present.

[weird-obsessed-girl]

Wolfstar Raises Harry Fic Rec/TBR

Below is a list with links to fanfics that focus on or include Sirius and Remus raising Harry, all of these are completed (cause I’m too impatient) and will be a mix of fics i have read or that i want to read. Organised by word count smallest to longest.

TW fics will include Harry’s abuse from the Dursleys.

Here’s the link to my other recs and TBR’s Harry Potter Fic List (mostly Drarry)

Raising Harry - mm5729

Domestic fluff, slice of life, fist full moon with Harry | G | 652

Up To No Good - dramaticwitchbitch

Harry learns his first swear word, alt universe, domestic fluff | Not rated | 1k

That’s My Moony - toofadedtofight

Possessive Sirius, discussions of grief, black family tapestry, Wolfstar explaining nicknames to 4 year old Harry | G | 1.7k

Family doesn’t give up, harry - paintblob

Protective Sirius, Vernon gets decked, Wolfstar rescue harry from Dursleys, this is also apart of 2 part series | G | 2.7k

& home & home & home (or, a time loop) - decemberista

Time loop, alt timelines, time travel fix-it, bring back Black, bittersweet, Marauders Era | T | 3.1k

Raising the boy who lived - hufflepuffchaos

A small series, hurt/comfort, good reacher, domestic fluff, Dursley bashing, slice of life | G | 3.7k

A world for us - a_threereasonswhy

Daily prophet headlines, angst, everyone needs a hug, Sirius is bad at feelings, drinking | T | 3.3k

Make it up, fall in love, try - astrolupins

Established Wolfstar, panic, vomiting, Remus fights for fair trial, Sirius is freed, raising harry implied but not in fic | M | 4.1k

This is my family - Patriceavril

Canon divergence, Sirius is free, Christmas, fluff and angst, families of choice, nightmares | T | 7.3k

Another Cheese Sandwich - Notawriter_17

Christmas, domestic fluff, Harry leaves Dursley family, fluff and angst | Not rated | 8.8k

My Anonymous Wolfstar Fics

Anonymous collection of small fics, def recommend ‘Moony and the Wolf’, child Harry, pre and during Hogwarts, fluff, past child abuse, explaining werewolves to harry | T | 10.3k

Baby On Board - aqua_myosis for MsAlexWP

Fluff, mpreg, non-explicit sex, overbearing Sirius, preggers Remus | E | 12k

(The Anatomy of an) Accidental necromancy - roseemma, rosemaldrge (roseemma)

Halloween 1981, POV Remus, hurt no comfort, Sirius free from Azkaban, fanart | Not rated | 13.5k

Rhythm & Blues - lez_writes13

Sirius is freed, heals with Remus, time to get Harry, sign language, domestic fluff, angst, memory loss, hurt/comfort | T | 18.8k

Beautiful boy (darling boy) - roaming_the_greenwood1

Friends to lovers, book 4, trans Remus, Sirius accidentally knocks up Remus, happy ending, kid fic, coparents to lovers, pining | M | 67.9k

Folklore Chronicles - throughthemist

A series of small fics about Wolfstar first meeting and adopting Harry when he’s hogwarts age, canon divergence, Sirius gets a trial | T | 189.7k

[zazima]

im rusty. so rusty. and also extremely late for christmas. i may as well have waited 350 days until the holidays came around again, but im trying to write more this year, so hear you go? eek im nervous. please pardon any grammatical errors or spelling mistakes. enjoy! also tumblr doesn't seem to have line breaks so sorry if any time jumps are confusing.

also a warning for language and mentions of wanting to step in front of a bus as an extreme response to being embarrassed. i swear this is all fluff otherwise.

Harry doesn't know what to get Sirius for Christmas.

Well, to clarify, Harry doesn't know if he can get Sirius anything adequately worth a damn. Because how can a game (magical or not) or piece of art or trinket or any sort of anything say hey Merry Christmas and by the way, thanks for saving me from my horrible abusive household where I lived in a cupboard and for wrangling a fucked up wizarding judicial system so that it both exonerates you from a murder you didn't commit and lets you adopt a kid you only properly met six months ago.

Harry would also like the gift (if he ever manages to find something) to say also thank you for giving me my own bedroom and for making pancakes every Saturday morning and for letting me visit my friends and for playing two-man Quidditch with me and for ruffling my hair and for always letting me pick the film that we watch and for telling me stories about my parents and for always being just enough and for not pushing me when I have nothing to say and for calling me by my name instead of shouting boy angrily-

Harry figures that he should cut himself off there. Any more gratitudes and the gift will literally be impossible to find, lest it be the size of Hogwarts in an effort to cram any and all unspoken messages Harry doesn't have the courage to voice out loud.

So Harry does what he usually does in a sticky situation. He turns to his friends.

No clue mate, Ron writes. I normally get Mum perfume and Dad whatever Muggle trinket he's been obsessing over. So unless Sirius wants a rubber duck, I probably won't be much help. But you could probably give him one and he'd be ecstatic. You're pretty much his favorite person right now.

Ah bloody hell. Do you think I should get Sirius something as a thanks for Pig?

Even though he's sure Ron's right (although Padfoot might enjoy a rubber duck more than Sirius), Harry doesn't have time to add Ron's own gift conundrum to his list of problems, so he turns to Hermione, who ends up being a bit more helpful.

I know you said that Sirius was interested in curse-breaking and how it can be used to help with cleaning up Grimmauld Place, so maybe something pertaining to that? A book or starter kit? Or perhaps something a bit more personal, something he couldn't just buy in a shop. Don't worry too much, Harry. He'll love whatever it is you give him because it's you.

Harry disregards the book suggestion immediately. Sirius does read; over the holiday break the two of them have taken to sitting quietly on opposite sides of the couch in the sitting room, reading books from the Black family library and munching on the latest treat Mrs. Weasley has sent them while flames blaze in the fireplace, only breaking the peaceful quiet occasionally to share whatever interesting passage has just been read. But Harry doesn't want to give a present that reminds Sirius of the exhausting work they do every day trying to make Grimmauld Place a habitable home.

Hermione's other suggestion, however, gets Harry thinking. Something he couldn't just buy in a shop. That obviously eliminates all of the last-resort items Harry had on his mental list, as they were dumb things he had planned to frantically order by mail once he gave up on the idea of finding something good enough for Sirius. But it also opens up a new idea, something that Harry himself had appreciated when he had received it a few years ago.

He begins firing off letters and mail-in order forms with an efficiency Hermione would admire. The owls return in quick fashion, up to three or four a day. Sirius doesn't notice anything at first, but when Hedwig taps on the kitchen window for the second time that day during breakfast, he gets up and lets her in with a raised eyebrow at Harry.

"Wiseacre's Wizarding Equipment?" he asks, somewhat incredulously, peering at the label on the package. "Harry, love, you know we can just go to Diagon Alley whenever you'd like. No need to rely on owl post if you're running low on supplies."

Harry flushes and snatches the small, soft package from Hedwig, stuffing it under his armpit and looking determinedly at his porridge. He hopes he doesn't have ACTUALLY IT'S PART OF YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT written all over his face.

"It's fine," he shrugs, aiming for casual nonchalance with his tone. "It's just a small thing. No point in going all the way down to Diagon Alley. Besides, the crowds would drive you crazy. They'd probably give you a concussion trying to get a picture."

Sirius grimaces, probably thinking of their last attempt to go for an ice cream at Fortescue's shortly before Harry had left for the fall term. They'd returned to Grimmauld Place ice cream-less and with a giant tear down the front of Harry's robes.

"Nothing a Glamour Charm wouldn't fix," he responds, grabbing his own empty bowl and bringing it to the sink. "Anyway, it's not fair for us to be shut up in this damned house because some people can't behave themselves in public. You just let me know whenever you want to go out, alright? I promise I won't breathe down your neck while you look at potions ingredients and whatnot. Even if they all suspiciously happen to be ingredients for an Enlarging Potion."

He manages to ruffle Harry's hair before the boy squawks out a "Sirius!" and darts out the kitchen, cackling in response to Harry's sputtered "I'm not... I wouldn't... SIRIUS!"

As Christmas approaches, Harry begins to stay up later and later into the night, working frantically to finish Sirius' present. One late night (or early morning, really), he hears a gentle knock on his door. He jumps and shoves the half completed project under his comforter.

"Come in!"

Sirius peeks his head through the cracked open door. "Are you alright? I was getting a glass of water and noticed your light was still on."

Harry nods, trying to convey a casualness he doesn't feel beneath the stress of wanting to have the present ready by Christmas morning. "Yes. Fine. I was just... reading." He reaches for his nightstand and holds up the latest book he's knicked from the Black family library for this exact purpose.

Sirius raises an eyebrow. "You sure? I've read that one before. Couldn't last more than thirty seconds at a time without falling asleep."

Harry glances at the cover. He hasn't even cracked it open yet. "It's actually quite interesting. I've always been fascinated by... the evolution of wizarding legalese from 1500 to 1800." He internally winces as the subject matter is finally made apparent to his sleep-deprived brain.

Sirius pauses, clearly sensing that something's up. He must decide that now's not the time to probe further because he says, "Alright. You're stronger than me, then. Let me know if you need anything though." He begins to retreat and close the bedroom door but stops right before he actually does. "I forgot, " he murmurs, opening the door wide and stepping fully into Harry's bedroom. He approaches Harry where he's sitting on his bed. Harry tries to discretely shove the half-finished present further under the covers. "You had a letter downstairs. We must have missed it earlier. I only saw it when I was getting water." He hands over a rather thick envelope to Harry, who flips it over, notes the name of the sender, and smiles, relieved.

Sirius lets out a small puff of air, and Harry looks up at the sound. Sirius pastes on a rather strained smile. "Do you often write to Mrs. Weasley?"

Harry's brain scrambles for a response. "Erm. Not really."

He doesn't say anything else, unsure how to explain away the situation convincingly. A rather awkward silence settles between them. Sirius looks as if he's summoning the courage to say something.

Sirius takes a deep breath. "I'm here if you ever want to talk, Harry. I know the Weasley's have always been great to you, and I never want to feel like you're getting that taken away. But, I just want you to know that I'm also here, in addition to them. For anything. No questions asked or judgement cast. Alright?"

The letter slips out of Harry's grip, as he frantically waves his hands in front of him, desperate to correct Sirius' perception of the situation. "Oh, no, Sirius, I know! I swear it. We were just... planning Ron's birthday present this year. They wanted to throw him a party." The fib comes easily.

Sirius visibly relaxes. "Oh. Ron's birthday's not until April though."

"Yes," Harry's brain scrambles for an explanation. "But you know how Mrs. Weasley is. Always trying to stay ahead. She's already starting to plan the menu. Fretting between bacon sandwiches or chicken legs for the main course."

Sirius shakes his head, a genuine smile starting to form on his face. "Well you know my vote is always for chicken legs. Assuming I'm invited of course."

"You know you're always invited. Mrs. Weasley always wants an opportunity to make sure you're feeding me properly," Harry rolls his eyes. "And Ron thinks you're pretty cool too. Even though you broke his leg."

Sirius gives him a mock scowl. "Hey now! I wasn't in my right mind that night. And I gave him an owl to make up for it! Even though I was probably doing myself more of a favor than him. That damned owl was driving me mad."

Harry giggles, and Sirius' smile grows wider at the sound. He lets out a dramatic sigh and leans over to ruffle Harry's hair, ignoring the sounds of protest that come in response to the action.

"Alright then, love. I'm off to bed. Shout if you need anything, and I'll be here in faster than you can say chicken legs. You hear me?"

Harry nods. "Yes sir."

Sirius scowls for real this time. "None of that now, remember?"

Harry nods again, this time rather sheepishly. Sirius bends over to kiss his forehead before heading out of the bedroom, shouting a "Good night!" over his shoulder before he closes the door behind him.

Harry sighs in relief, pulls the present out from underneath the comforter, tears open Mrs. Weasley's letter, and gets back to work.

The morning of the 25th is bright and cold.

Harry is a ball of nerves as the breakfast plates get cleared away and the two of them prepare to go to the sitting room to open presents. Padfoot had barged into Harry's room at half past seven, barking loudly and leaping onto the bed, nearly giving Harry a heart attack in the process. He'd only finished Sirius' present in the wee hours of the morning and had barely managed to shove it into his desk drawer before he'd fallen asleep.

Sirius had dragged Harry into the kitchen for special Christmas chocolate chip pancakes and hot chocolate but had only allowed Harry to start eating once he agreed to don a ridiculously oversized Santa hat that matched the one Sirius had on his own head.

"If I'd known you liked Christmas so much, I'd have taken you to the Muggle mall to get a picture with Santa," Harry grumbles only half-heartedly as he watches the milk heat up on the hob. Sirius was adamant about making hot chocolate the old-fashioned way.

Sirius laughs loudly and hooks his arm around Harry's neck, pulling him close and planting a kiss on his forehead with a loud smack. "It's our first Christmas together, kiddo! First of many. You can get past your anti-morning attitude for that, can't you?"

"I gueeeeeeees," Harry mock-whines, drawing out the word as he adds the chopped chocolate to the steaming milk. He's secretly pleased that Sirius seems to somewhat enjoy his company. It shows he's not such a terrible charge.

"Thank you for your sacrifice," Sirius states dramatically. He gives Harry one last squeeze before releasing him. "Now come on, let's get to presents. I call going first!" He darts off to the sitting room where, overnight, a large pile of presents has piled in front of the eight-foot tall tree Sirius had dragged home one afternoon (with lots of swearing).

Harry gulps nervously as he pours hot chocolate into two mugs and tops them both with a handful of marshmallows. His hands are slightly shaking as he brings them both to the sitting room. Sirius is poking around the heap of gifts as he enters the room, and Harry spots the hastily wrapped, lumpy package he completed only a few hours ago.

Please like it, please like it, please like it, he silently begs as he sets the mugs on the coffee table. The sight of the gift is almost nauseating, and he keeps his eyes fixed on the hot chocolate.

Sirius turns at the sound to spot Harry and grins. "Alrighty, kiddo, what do you want to unwrap first? I did go a bit overboard this year, you'll have to forgive me. But there's plenty here from your friends!" He's practically vibrating with excitement.

Harry straightens his back and clears his throat. "Actually, do you mind if you do the opening first?"

Sirius pauses. "Are you sure? I swear mine are quite good."

Harry nods vigorously. "Yes. You can start with mine. It's right on top. The green wrapping." Let's just get this over with, he thinks.

Sirius picks up the package and shakes it gently. It makes no noise, and Harry can't help but let out a chuckle despite the knots in his stomach. Sirius grins at him and begins to carefully unwrap the gift.

Harry's legs suddenly feel like treacle tart filling. He lowers himself onto the couch so he doesn't pass out.

The wrapper paper gently falls to the ground, revealing a mound of knit material. Sirius unravels the pile to reveal a rather lumpy, oversized navy blue sweater with a slightly misshapen black dog woven onto the front.

Sirius doesn't say anything.

Harry's heart drops to his stomach. He opens his mouth, desperate to explain away the situation. "It's uh... it's... erm... it's a sweater? I made it?" As if that wasn't fucking obvious, he internally snarls at himself. He shakes his head, trying to organize his thoughts. "Yes, I, um, I made it. That's uh... that's Padfoot. On the front of it. I knitted it."

Sirius doesn't say anything.

Harry's words start coming out faster and faster, hoping something comes out that remedies this clusterfuck of an event. "Mrs. Weasley helped me. She sent me instructions. And the patterns? That 's why she was sending me so many letters. I didn't know how to do it. They aren't throwing a party for Ron."

Sirius still doesn't say anything.

Oh fuck! Harry thinks wildly. He's probably livid I lied. Oh fuck fuck fuck. "I'm sorry I lied to you! I just wanted it to be a surprise," he manages to get out. "That's why I was ordering so much through owl post. I had to get the yarn and the needles. And I kept having to order more yarn because I kept getting frustrated and messing up a lot. I didn't want you to know. Until now, that is. Obviously."

Sirius. Still. Doesn't. Say. Anything.

Harry wants to crawl into a hole and die. But for some stupid, idiotic reason, he keeps speaking. "I wasn't sure if you'd like the color? I actually realized that I don't know what your favorite color is. But whenever Mrs. Weasley makes one for me or for the Weasley kids, she usually does our favorite color. Or house colors. But I figured you have lots of things in Gryffindor colors? Like your wand holster. And then I noticed that you wear a lot of navy. So I thought that might be nice."

If Sirius doesn't say anything, Harry just might call the Knight Bus so he can step in front of it. He decides to get everything off of his chest before he has to do so.

"Mrs... uh... Mrs. Weasley made me one," he explains softly. "My first year. And every year after that. It means a lot to me. I think it was probably the first gift I ever got. And it kind of made me feel like part of their family? A little bit at least. So... so I wanted to give you one. Not from her, of course. But from me. So you could feel like a part of... our family?" His sentence embarrassingly ends like a question, so he hastily tacks on, "If you want to, of course."

Sirius finally moves, and Harry shuts his mouth. He gently sets the sweater down on the armchair next to him, walks over to where Harry is sitting, and pulls him up into the tightest, fiercest hug Harry has ever experienced.

Neither say anything for a few moments. Until Harry can't deal with not being able to breathe and squeaks out, "Uh? Sirius? I can't really inhale."

Sirius releases him quickly and takes a step back. "Sorry."

Harry feels awkward again. He clears his throat, hoping to fill the silence with something. "I hope you like it. But I know it's not done very well. So I can take it apart if you'd rather that. The shop said they'd take the yarn back as long as it wasn't too worn."

Sirius' head snaps up. "What? Harry, my love, I don't not like it. I love it."

Harry's mouth goes dry. "What?"

Sirius gives him a small smile. His eyes look suspiciously glassy. "Harry. You made this for me. You made this for me! It's my favorite color, and it's got me on it! Of course I love it. Not just because you took the time and the effort to make something for me. Because, my goodness, how do you even start with something like this? It must have taken you ages. But also because, well, you said it yourself. I mean, I already felt like part of the same family with the whole adoption bit and knowing you since you were a baby and whatnot, but it's always nice to know you feel the same. And I'm so honored to be a part of your family. Always will be. You have to know that, alright?" Sirius presses their foreheads together. "Alright?"

Harry nods, feeling a little something catch in his throat. He nods.

"Thank you for my gift," Sirius says softly. "I love it. No talk about talking it apart. I'll be proper mad if you do, you hear me?"

Harry nods again. Sirius releases him. He grabs the sweater from the armchair and pulls it over his head. The hem is uneven and the dog looks more like a cat once the sweater settles on his body, but Sirius only looks down at it and grins.

"Now come on, it's your turn to open presents. I don't think any of mine are as good as a handmade sweater, but I hope you like them anyway. And that's got me thinking, we ought to do a Christmas card no? Especially now that I've got a nice sweater on. Mrs. Weasley might tear up at the sight of a photo of the two us. Come on, come on, pick a present."

Harry rolls his eyes without any real heat behind the action. And he doesn't say anything later when he feels a burst of pride when he sees the photo they take in front of the Christmas tree that afternoon, Sirius wearing the sweater with the biggest, proudest smile Harry has ever seen.

He just bottles the feeling and hopes to remember it forever.

[robynlilyblack]

A good mum

Sirius Black and fem! reader

[Requested – see request here]

Summary: Y/n and Sirius never planned on being parents, but after the events of Halloween they are left to raise Harry 

Warnings: talks of pregnancy and birth, cannon character death, grief, insecurities, hurt/comfort, all things baby related (diapers etc), big angst in places but lots of fluff, mentions of nudity, eating, food and sex

A/n: 6.6k words, I really like this, a lot of the things are based off of my own experiences with my baby cousins and me being completely incompetent living on my own, thank you for the request, enjoy x

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You had never fancied yourself a mother, even from a young age you just knew you never wanted kids. People around you always gave the ‘you’ll change your mind later’ but the years went by and, if anything, you became more adamant about it. 

There were two main reasons, the first was you were positive you wouldn’t make a good mum, you couldn’t hardly take care of yourself let alone another human being that depended solely on you not to mention you were a bit of a risk taker and definitely lacked the responsibly needed. Second, the idea of actually giving birth and pregnancy along with all the associated pain terrified you and after seeing your godson come out of your best friend that was solidified. Birth wasn’t a beautiful thing; sure, once little Harry was all cleaned up he was cute as a button it was but merlin was it gross and accidently picking up Lily’s mucus plug was probably the worst part.

Due to this, most of your relationships never lasted too long as they would start talking about the future, having kids. Sure, you were young at the time but with the war life moved faster than normal, people were getting married and starting families young since no one was sure they would survive. 

After graduation you moved in with your best friend, Sirius, since James and Lily decided to get a house and he was now in need of a roommate and you a place to stay. You and he had always had a connection, you were terribly similar, so much so it was the reason neither of you ever made a move. That was until the close proximity finally pushed you both over that fine line you were teetering on

“Siri I’m back!” you call out, hauling in the heavy shopping bags “Siri!” your shout is a little strained 

You get no response so you struggle with the bags and close the door on your own, that was until you catch one on the corner of the table and everything spills out. You were only thankful you didn’t buy eggs as it all hit the floor the cans causing a considerable large thump

“Fuck” you yelp as one of them hits your foot, squatting down and letting your butt fall to the floor as you clutch your foot

You look up to hear the banging of a door and what sounds like a skid followed by Sirius coming around the corner panicking

“Holy shit, are you okay darling?” he asks kneeling down in front of you, checking you’re alright but your more focused on his current attire

No wonder he didn’t hear you he had been in the shower, hair damp with droplets falling from his perfect curls, glistening chest covered in the tattoos you had always adored and a pretty pink towel wrapped around him, one which used to be white but thanks to a pair of Sirius’ boxers had been since dyed

“Y/n?” he peers at you confused before following your eyes, beginning to smirk “Darling” he says in a lower tone

You finally look up “Yeah?” you ask a little flustered but not embarrassed, you had admired him many a time before as had he with you

“I asked if you were alright”

“Oh” you look around seeing the groceries, the pain in your foot returning “Yeah the bag broke and I think a tin or something hit my foot” your hands try to smooth the injury through your shoe

“Here” Sirius moves your hands away, slipping off of your shoe and sock, warm hands massaging over the area as he shifts closer, pulling your foot over his towel clad lap “Better” he looks up to see you smiling at him

“Much, thanks Siri” you scoot with your butt closer to him, wrapping your arms around him

He looks a little surprised but accepts it “What’s this for? If anything, it’s my fault for sleeping in and letting you go shopping yourself” he says kissing the top of your head

You hug him a little tighter before you let go looking up at him “Siri” you give him a look before shaking your head “Nothing” you wave it off going to get up but he stops you

Sirius eyes meet yours and almost like he can read your mind he leans in, pressing his lips to yours in a soft kiss. It’s sweet like he’s testing the waters, and when you don’t pull away he deeps it, pulling you closer to him as his lips begin to move in sync with your own

He rubs his nose with yours as he pulls away “That what you wanted to ask?” he says a little breathless

You smile, you and he were always on the same wavelength which is why he would still love you for this “Nope I was actually going to say that you really do smell like a wet dog now” you test with a teasing grin

He lets out a laugh “Oh really…I’ll show you a wet dog” he smirks wickedly at you

“I hope that’s a very strange euphemism…” then it hits you “Oh no” you scramble up as Sirius shifts, chasing you around the flat as a dog 

Eventually you fall over onto the couch turning onto your back as he jumps on top of you licking your face making you laugh

You hold up your hands “I yield, I yield please it tickles” you giggle but it slows as you feel added weight on top of you

Looking up you see Sirius back to his usual self, grinning down a you “Hello” he says in the flirtest tone he’d ever given you

“Hi” your hands move to grip the towel but there was none instead you griped his bare hips

Both of you look down to see Sirius wasn’t concentrating enough to shift back with the towel. His eyes flick to see your reaction, checking you aren’t uncomfortable, smiling to himself at your raised eyebrow, the way your lips are pressed together in an admiring smile

“Like the view darling?” he says confident, leaning in to kiss your forehead

You finally tear your eyes away “You better buy us another a new towel pretty sure that was the last one” you say causally

He pokes his cheek “As long as you dye them pink again, it suits me” he smiles at you

You nod eyes shamelessly flicking down “Deal and pink definitely suits you pretty boy…” you peck his lips “…my pretty boy?” you ask with slight inflection

His smile grows “Hell yeah…and you’re my darling?” he asks in a similar tone to you

“Hell yeah” you copy his enthusiasm and he chuckles “Oh and Siri…” you pull him closer to you

“Yes?” he licks his lips, letting his nose brushing over yours

“Killer view”

Everyone had already seen it coming a mile away and if the two of you were honest you both knew you were headed down this road already. Your dynamic didn’t change much, the two of you were touchier and kissed at every opportunity but you remained best friends, joked around and never bothered to confirm or add labels to anything because the two of you just knew. You and he never spoke about the future, you were still nervous about how he might react when you told him and little did you know he had the same worries.

Sirius never wanted to be a father, he was terrified he would impart his damage onto the child and he knew himself he was far too reckless to be intrusted with one. He bounced around from person to person back at Hogwarts, his relationships barely making it to one month, which is one of the reasons he made yours and his so special. There was this small looming feeling in his gut, he knew he wanted to marry you, spend his life with you and only you, but he didn’t want kids and he was scared when you found out that fact you would leave

“We have a little announcement” James clinks his glass standing up, smiling like a mad man

You and Sirius just smile, his hand squeezing your upper thigh as you turn to listen, Remus, Marlene and Dorca sitting opposite you with Peter on Sirius’ other side. James walks around to Lily’ side, hand going around her waist and then his hand and her touched her…stomach

Your heart fluttered, you knew she had been wanting a baby and been getting worried since it had been almost a year since their wedding, so you were overjoyed for her. 

“We’re pregnant” Lily’s says happily, both her and James’ smiles so wide

Marlene and Dorca practically jump up and tackle Lily as gently as they could while Remus stands to go give James a huge hug, followed quickly by you, Sirius and Peter. Soon everyone had given their congratulations as well as many, many hugs and now you were all digging into dinner

“Can’t believe one of us is going to have a little baby” Dorca says super excited, so much so Marlene giggles as she rubs her girlfriends back making sure she doesn’t combust

“I’m so happy for you guys, you’re going to make great parents” Remus says holding up his glass

You and Sirius raise yours and smile but there’s an uneasiness, Sirius’ hand returns to your thigh and yours cups his, both seeking comfort you didn’t know the other needed too

“Thanks guys, my Lilypad going to be the best mum in the world” James smiles fondly at Lily down the table before turning to you and Sirius “What about you two? Should we expect a mini pads or y/n” he wiggles his eyebrows

Your smiles falter but luckily Remus’ joke lightens the mood so you don’t have to answer “Wouldn’t be surprised they’re like bunnies” 

“I would have though Sirius would be more…doggy” Marlene teases eying Sirius while the rest laugh

Sirius keeps composed and laughs “Well since you asked we like variety in our lives and sometimes y/n likes to…” your hands claps over Sirius but everyone knows what he meant, Remus, Dorcas and Marlene giving you amused looks, James and Lily just giggle while Peter looks confused before going through the 5 stages of grief when he realises

Both you and Sirius hold each other that little bit tighter the rest of the night, something that both comforts and terrifies you both. As it leaves the two of you wondering if it’s because the other wants to have kids.

When you return to your flat you and he are quiet, which was abnormal. Sirius looked over at you whilst you were getting changed, watching as you fiddled with the top of your shirt unable to quite get the small clasp

“Let me” he says quietly, moving over and easily undoing the fastener

He motions silently for you to lift your arms pulling the shirt over your head before moving around to hook your bra, leaving you to start work on your trousers while he gets changed. As he finishes he sees you in thought as you pull a baggy shirt over your head 

“You alright?” he asks softly

You don’t look at him, just move to sit on the edge of the bed 

He joins you “What’s wrong?” he cups your hand with his, feeling a little worried, was this it? Were you going to ask him to try, would you leave when he told you no?

Your fingers trail over his hand for a few seconds like your trying to find the words and he waits patiently even if his mind is a run with thoughts

“Siri…I don’t want to have kids” you admit quietly, like it wasn’t the first time you had told someone and you were afraid he would act the way they did

Sirius takes a moment to process before wrapping an arm around your shoulder pulling you towards him and kissing your temple, relief washing over him, always the same wavelength

“You aren’t…disappointed right?” you face him, melting under his warm eyes

He shakes his head, hand cupping your cheek “No of course not” he assures, kissing your forehead “I…”

“No” you cut him off, confusing him “Please don’t say I can wait until you’re ready because…I don’t want kids. Ever. I’m happy being Harrys godmother, I’m happy to babysit but I…I…wouldn’t make a good mum and I don’t want to be one” you can’t look at him as you speak scared this will be the end 

He tilts your head to look at him, heart aching at your glassy eyes “Darling that’s okay. I was going to say that’s good because I don’t want to be a dad either” he confesses

Your shoulders relax “Really?” you ask and when he nods you climb over his lap and hug him

He hugs you back right away “You’d still marry me though?” he asks half serious

You break away, cupping his cheeks “When you ask me I’ll say yes”

You did end up getting married the following year, a few months after Harry was born. Everything was good for a while, until just after Harrys first birthday and everything began to fall apart. Marlene died first, you and Dorca where the ones to find her. Dorcas screams were something you would never forget, nor would you ever forgive yourself for not stopping her before she apparated, as she died less than a week later seeking vengeance on the one that killed the love of her life…little did you know that person was closer than you thought.

Remus went into isolation, Frank and Alice continued to fight but were wary for their son’s safety and the Prewett brothers were killed, then James, Lily and Harry needed to go into hiding. Dumbledore asked them to appoint a secret keeper, or keepers, he offered but of course James and lily wanted you and Sirius first. However, after much thought you decided it was too obvious so you asked Peter

Less than one week later, the spell concealing them was broken and your friends were murdered

The night of their death you and Sirius rushed to Peters hideout, under the impression Voldemort had got to him first but you were met with an empty hideout, no signs of struggle and evidence in the form of letters that your close friend, a brother to you both was a traitor. Sirius spent the next 30 minutes smashing everything in the room while you just sat and watched, heart shattered into pieces

“We need to find him, he needs to pay” Sirius says after a while, exasperated and beyond angry

You stare at him for a minute, he was right peter deserved to suffer but not at your hands, you had to be smart about this “We can’t”

“We can’t? Y/n he killed our friends!”

“He’s been a mole for months, possibility years, you don’t think he’s thought this through?” you stand up pointing to the letters “No one but us know he’s a mole Sirius, if we go on a blind revenge trip, we will slip up and he can easily frame us or we’ll get ourselves killed. How does that help Harry, or Moony or Alice and Frank if we go to Azkaban?”

“He killed Marlene y/n you read the letter she was his initiation…no wonder there was no forced entry she let him in the house!” he exclaims and you grimace

“Sirius I fucking know that, I saw her body, she didn’t even have her wand in her hand. Trust me I want him dead but we need to go to Dumbledore and explain, show him the letters, let what’s left of the order search for him. We’ve lost what feels like everyone Sirius, but if we go down that road be will actually lose everything”

After some more convincing Sirius reluctantly came home with you, he was still angry but after a few hours of forced sleep he realised you were right and was beyond grateful. In the light of day, it was announced Voldemort had been defeated by none other than your godson, some death eaters didn’t stop though Bellatrix, Barty Crouch Jr and the Lastrange brothers kidnapped Frank and Alice. Luckily you, Sirius and Mary managed to get there and save them since the hideout was detailed in on of Peters letters, the couple were beaten up, tortured but they would be okay in the long run. 

Dumbledore came to you and Sirius after having Harry in his care for the last 24 hours, with Peter officially on their most wanted list, you and he were granted custody if you wanted it, if not he would give the boy to Lily’s sister. You had met the women once when you had helped Lily move her childhood stuff to her new house, she was cold and hated wizards with a passion that rivalled Snape’s for James, therefore, despite your fears and you both agreed, it’s what they would have wanted.

There was a learning curve to being a mum and dad neither you are Sirius knew about, in fact you both just sat staring at Harry as he played on the opposite couch

“This seems rather simple right?” Sirius asks looking a bit nervous

You bob your head “He seems to be enjoying himself” despite your agreement you felt sick, what if you were a bad mother, there was no way you could live up to Lily and it felt wrong to even call yourself the ‘m’ word when that belonged to your late friend

“Should we feed him soon? There’s a bunch of those little jars they used to feed him with” Sirius says and your hearts ache, neither of you had said their names, knowing that saying them out loud would be admitting they were truly gone and you were ready for that

“Good idea…” you trail off seeing Harry scrunching up his face like he was concentrating…oh he was pooping, wasn’t he? “Oh merlin” you say to yourself

“I’ll get the food ready shall I?” Sirius escapes before you can stop him

“Siri” you plead but he offered no response

Sighing you stand and walk over to Harry who does have the most adorable pout on his face “Hi kid” you greet “Shit yourself?” you joke before your eyes widen “Don’t say shit” you point at him to which he just looks at you strangely 

You let out a nervous chuckle awkwardly lifting him into your arms and making the mistake of holding him by the butt, feeling the squish

“Aww fuck…don’t say fuck either” you warn him earning again another weird look 

Carrying him through to his bedroom, well your guest room which had a half-built crib you gave up on erecting, a changing table and some cans of yellow paint, you place him down on the table 

You began to change his diaper, well attempt with the best can do attitude

“Oh good heavens Harry” you half gagged at the smell, looking down at the nappy “What in merlin did you eat?” you ask him like he could answer you

You didn’t really know how to talk to kids, you weren’t the baby talk kind of person, you talked to him normally, it was weird but later you would learn that Harry loved that about you

“Right so we will take this” you take off the diaper holding it far away from your face as you fold it up and put it in the little bin “Okay now to clean you up” you pull out some baby wipes and clean him up “See fresh as a daisy” you smile “Well…until the next time anyway” you add and he tilts his head at you 

You hadn’t noticed Sirius was now leaning on the doorframe watching you with a curious smile

“Okay now” you stare at the new diaper “Do you know if it has a specific way around?” you ask him leaving some space for him to answer which is filled by a little babble “Your right I should check the box” you take it reading it for instructions placing it on the table as you try to follow them

Sirius tilts his head as he hears you swear to yourself, asking Harry if he would be willing to be dangled over the toilet so you didn’t have to do this again. He had never imagined either of you as parents, you as a mother but watching you it light something in him he didn’t know was there. He was nervous sure, his insecurities weren’t going away any time soon but he knew it was going to be alright, you would get there together

“Done…I think” you say picking up and shaking him up and down softly “Look at that” you smile proudly as you look over and finally spot Sirius

He has a look in his eyes you can’t quite read but you like it that was until he started chuckling

“What?” you pout at him

He nods to Harry and you look sighing as the diaper as slipped off “Oh for Godric’s sake” you say before eyeing Harry “Siri why does he look confused? He…” you begin but are cut off as he starts peeing and you just nod as it covers your front, accepting it while Sirius is fully in laughter 

Eventually you did learn and become an expert at changing diapers, Sirius was better at it though and offered most times to change harry when He cried during the night. You both were exhausted but got into a routine, they two of you were stay at home parents thanks to Sirius’ uncle’s money you wanted for nothing…well actually wanted sleep maybe a long lie in past four in the morning

One day Sirius had taken Harry out to visit Remus, leaving you in the house yourself. You would have gone but after some dire cramps in the morning Sirius insisted you stay and rest, of course the silence was nice for all of one hour before the novelty ran off

“Has that window always been brown…I could have sworn it was white” you say to yourself as you sat on the couch with your little water bottle, some muggle show about antiques playing in the background “Maybe we should paint it white” you muse

After spending around 30 minutes deciding whether or not to actually do it you figure that’s probably not the best job to start yourself and instead go get started on dinner. You took out one of the little recipes from Lily’s old book, your fingers tracing over the writing before you placed it down and got out what was needed for her soup.

“Seems about right?” you mutter to yourself as you measure the last of the ingredients before giving the stock a good stir

Cutting up the veggies you put them in a little bowl until the base had boiled, dancing around the kitchen to the radio as you went but it wasn’t the same as it was before. The house still felt quiet, you missed them, both of them. In the last few months you grew used to Harrys presence but you didn’t feel connected with him, not like Sirius did anyway. He could make Harry laugh, rock him to sleep, do everything a dad should be able to do yet you felt like you were holding an alien sometimes. He wouldn’t laugh just watch you…to be honest you wouldn’t be surprised if he thought you were the alien

Sirius had Harry on his hip as he came in the door “You get any bigger Harry I’m going to need to visit the gym” he says to himself as he puts the chain on

Walking deeper into the flat he was going to call out when he heard you singing along to dancing queen on the radio

“Young and sweet only seventeen”

He smiled turning to Harry “She’s still as pretty as she was at seventeen, more so actually” he tells Harry who tilts his head and smiles

Sirius walks to the door of the kitchen to watch you dancing about

“Watch that scene”

“Gladly darlin” he says to himself eliciting the smallest of giggles from Harry who also watches you intently

“You're a teaser, you turn 'em on”

You sing as you pick up the bowl of veggies and begin pouring them in

“Leave 'em burning … oh fuck don’t burn me merlin” your whole-body jerks back as you continue to drop them in, cowering behind the bowl to avoid the boiling liquid splashing 

Sirius bites his lip “That’s my dancing queen” he lets out a chuckles

Harrys birthday rolled around soon enough and you, Sirius and Remus took him on a trip down diagon alley, which was easier said than done as he had become rather adapt at walking and mini sprints away

“Would it be inappropriate to get him a lead?” Sirius asks as he watches you run after him this time

Remus lets out a huff of a chuckle “Ironic considering James suggested that to you once” he says with an amused smile seeing you have caught up and are carrying him 

Sirius lets out a small laugh but his heart aches at the mention os his name. It warmed and destoryed him that Harry was the spitting image and those big green eyes reminded him so much of one of the best women he’d ever had the pleasure of knowing

“You know…Kid!” you say as the boy scrambles in your grasp trying to hug you like a kola “You know maybe he needs a lead or something…I swear he’s like a little rocket” you shake your head, voice shaky as you let Harry wrap his arms around your front like he was a backpack

Sirius smiles at you while Remus shakes his head 

“I swear you two are turning into each other” Remus notes 

You give your husband a funny look while he just winks at you “So where do you want to go first?” 

“There’s a gallery down the way, with an ice cream shop across from it so i was thinking...” 

Harrys head lifts from the crook of your neck “Ice-cream, ice-cream, ice-cream!” he exclaims giddily cutting you off 

He didn’t have the biggest vocabulary but he could say some words perfectly and those included ice-cream, Siri, y/n, Remmy, doggie and chocolate, yes Remus was certainly to blame for the last one but the extra treats did give harry the cutest chubby cheeks so you forgave him

“Looks like he’s made up his mind” Sirius chuckles, giving Harrys hair a little ruffle and a kiss to the cheek while your give him a little pout “What?”

You turn up your nose “Nothing I just see how it is” you try to keep a straight face but he can see the tiny smile

“Oh darling do you want some sugar?” he says coyly in a tone that Harry finds funny

Remus rolls his eyes, taking Harry from your grasp but you are too distracted with Sirius to see his saddened pout and attempt at grabby hands 

“I’m going to head to get us some sweets” Remus announces walking away with Harry who cuddles into Remus but leans his head on his shoulder and watches you and Sirius forlornly

Sirius places his hands on your hips “Sorry darling” he apologises

You keep up the charade “That’s not going to cut it” you cross your arms yet you can feel yourself melting into his touch and oh does he know it

He kisses your cheek and you give him a little dissatisfied hum in response, he then kisses your other cheek and you repeat the noise but need to press your lips together to prevent the smile trying to take over your face. He kisses your nose and then rubs his with yours cauing the smile to slip out but you recover

“Nope” you pop the ‘p’

He chuckles pecking your lips before it comes to him “I have something” he poses

“What?” you eye him

He leans in to whisper in your ear, breath trailing down your neck “Dishes for a week” he proposes

You finally let yourself smile “You got yourself a deal” you look at him triumphantly before kissing his cheek and walking off after Remus

Sirius stands there for a moment then jogs to catch up with you “You did that on purpose didn’t you?” he says taking your hand in his

You smirk at him “Oh yeah” you nod, pleased with yourself “Also” you stop just before entering the shop “Remus is staying this weekend and the Longbottom’s are coming for a playdate…” you push open the door looking back “and will be staying for dinner too” you throw him a wink as you enter

Sirius looks at you in faux annoyance but he couldn’t stay annoyed for long as he enters the shop, seeing Harry waddle over and show you with a cone that’s basically the size of him. 

He felt so happy at the scene but he felt guilty at times like this. He loved the chaotic little family you and he had been given but it was bittersweet knowing it should have been Lily and James. He didn’t know being a father figure would be so rewarding, nor did he think you and he would do as good a job…well he didn’t think he would do a good job because he could see how Harry lit up around you, the way Harry gravitated towards you more, something he was more than happy with as he could see sometimes you still had fears

You dropped your keys into the little dish as you entered the apartment, hearing Harrys distant giggles. You smiled to yourself closing your eyes briefly as your heart warmed at the sound. Walking deeper into the flat you entered the living room expecting your husband to be watching cartoons or something but instead you were greeted with your husband in his Padfoot form with Harry clutching onto the fur of his back as they trotted around the room

You didn’t know whether to be angry or laugh, you would be a liar if you and Sirius hadn’t joked about doing that to Lily and James but now you were in the parent seat and suddenly you could see the corners of the tables and every little thing that could go wrong…was this mum mode?

You could tell by Sirius’ grey eyes peering at you he had been caught, clearly not expecting you back so soon as he stops in his tracks

“Y-Y/n!! Look at me” Harry says cutely as he spots you, looking happier than the sun 

Your heart is a puddle on the floor around you though “I see you” you say with a smile you can’t peel off your face but your tone is a little wary 

“M-” Harry starts trying to wave but ends up falling off of Sirius, it’s a small fall but to you it was like he fell off a building

“Kid!” you stumble over, knees hitting the floor as you look at him in panic

The boy looks up at you just as you feel Sirius shift bac, both of you wincing as you wait for the tears but instead your met with little claps and giggling

“Again, again!” Harry says happily

You and Sirius sigh in relief “See he’s fine” Sirius ways a little out of puff

Nudging him with your elbow you scold him “Fine this time but what were you thinking” 

You turn back to Harry scooping the boy into your arms and holding him to your chest, something the boy doesn’t protest in the slightest while Sirius just looks at you a little nervous at your tone but his heart fluttering at how mum-sey you are being 

“He is 3 Siri, what if he hit his perfect little head, or what if he hurt your back and you couldn’t shift…he’s too young for this kind of thing” you say firmly with a pout as you cuddle Harry hand going to the back of his head

Sirius licks his lips and let takes a deep breath “Sorry darling” he caresses your cheek with his thumb, wiping it over the skin gently “He was upset we saw a dog in the park and didn’t have one, I just wanted to cheer him up” he explains but even though your face softens you give him a look “It won’t happen again” that you’ll know of

“It better not eh Kid” you pull Harry back to look at him “Because there will be no Siri and Y/n alone time for a month if it does” you smile scrunching up your nose at the boy making him smile and nod

Sirius gives you a tight-lipped smile “Rather harsh” he mopes lightly

You give harry a cheeky look before sticking your tongue out at Sirius, not seeing Harry copying your movements

People noticed you and Sirius never used the words mummy or daddy in front of Harry, which meant the boy never used them because he simply never heard them used to describe you both. Even 3 years after their death you never used the terms, parents? Sure. Guardians? Definitely. But mum and dad? Never

“Sirius” Remus asks as he digs into his lunch, watching you eating with Harry on the couch as he watches some cartoons, although according to Sirius you enjoyed them more than the boy did

“Yeah” Sirius replies swiping his lip with his thumb then sucking off the sauce

“Why do you not use mum and dad to Harry” he says turning his gaze to his friend “I’ve been wondering for years” 

Sirius’ eyes flick between a blissful you and Harry to Remus, finally settling on the latter “To start it felt wrong considering the circumstances, but now?…I want to call her it...” he confesses “...just not sure if she’s ready for it”

Remus nods but there’s a surprise in his face “She’s an amazing mother” he compliments 

Sirius smiles “She is” he agrees wholeheartily before speaking lower “Remus we never told you this…I never told you this”

“What?” Remus tilts his head

He takes a breath “You remember how you all used to joke about a mini pads or y/n” Remus nods “Well we never wanted that, we never wanted children”

Remus’ eyes widen a little “I get that” he says truly “Get that more than most but…you seem happy raising him now, you both do” his eyes flick to you as he says the last part

Sirius places his hand over Remus’ giving it a squeeze before retracting it again “I am, I like...I like being a dad” Remus smiles “And I think she likes being a mum, I just…I think she’s still scared she isn’t doing a good job”

“Seriously?”

“Siriusly” they chuckle lightly before Sirius looks at you sadly “I found her crying a few nights ago while Harry slept”

“A few nights ago was…”

“Red’s birthday” his eyes go glassy with forming tears “She was apologising to him, wishing she could be the mother he deserved, scared that she’s doing it all wrong”

Remus’ eyebrows knit together, heart aching as he watches you put Harrys plate down and let him sit on your lap as you continue watching 

“She hides it well” Sirius says drawing the man’s eyes back to him “I really hope she sees what we see one day”

That day didn’t come for another year and over that year leading up to it your little family only got closer. You took Harry on plently of days out, both wizard and muggle activities just like James and Lily would have wanted, he was allowed to play with Sirius as Padfoot, even walking him along with you in the park, something you teased Sirius about rotten. 

Something you didn’t know was that Sirius had slipped saying the ‘m’ word when describing you to Harry on occasion, the first time he didn’t mean it but over time he grew to adore that word for you and hoped you would too

“You okay?” you ask coming up behind Sirius on the bed, arms slithering under his arms as you plant a kiss to his bare shoulder

He hums as you begin to put his hair in a braid for bed “Harrys down but it’s the thunder, I can already hear it…times like this I hate Padfoot” he shuffles uneasily as he hears another rumble

You lift the completed braid and kiss below his ear “Don’t worry I’ll happily be big spoon tonight for my brave…” you kiss him again further down his neck “…little…” you kiss his jaw as he turns his head “…puppy” you peck his lips

He smiles at you “Merlin I love you” he twists his body around to hug you properly

“Love you too pup” 

You and Sirius settle into bed, his head on your chest, arms wrapped around you with his legs entangled with your own while your arms hold him protectively, soothing his hair with your fingers as he shivers with each grumble.

You both were about to fall asleep when you heard the door creak open, your head turned and Sirius shifted his around still on your chest but he could now see the door. Your hearts aching as you see a sniffling Harry clutching his little deer teddy to his chest

“What’s wrong kid you have a nightmare” you ask softly, you hated seeing him upset it broke your own heart

He shakes his head “The noises…are…are scary” he pouts wiping his nose with his shirt “Can I sleep with you” he asks and how could neither of you could ever say no too

“Of course” you tell him gesturing for him to join while Sirius shifts off of you and opens up the covers

He practically jumps into the bed looking happier than before, kneeling beside you with Sirius on the other side and you shift so he can snuggle into your husband 

“Who do you want to cuddle with?” Sirius asks with a knowing smile

Harry doesn’t answer just falls into you, clutching your pyjama shirt with one hand and his teddy with the other, while you freeze looking at Sirius who just kisses your cheek like he expected it. Your eyes returned to the boy and you smile as you wrap one arm around him, heart-warming as he nuzzles into you.

“Come here pup” you say quietly to Sirius and let him cuddle into your other side, giving both of their head’s kisses, your boys

“Night Siri, night kid” 

“Night darlin” Sirius leans up and gives you a quick peck “Night Harry” he brushes the boys hair gently making him smile

“Night” Harry says to Sirius before propping his head up to look at you “Night mummy” he says with the cutest tone then cuddles into you, quickly falling asleep

Your mouth was agape, tears forming as you looked at Sirius ‘did he?’ you mouth

Sirius nods shifting upwards in the bed to whisper in your ear “You’re a good mum y/n” he kisses your cheek ���And it’s okay for us to be his mum and dad” he affirms

You let a small tear fall as you hug Harry tightly “But…” 

He wipes the tear “It’s okay, I like…I love being his dad, and I know James and Lily would be happy knowing that” he says softly, finally saying their names and it feels like a weight is lifted, a weight that had been holding you both down since that awful night

You look at Harry then your husband “I love being his mum too” you confess, a smile breaking across your face as you say it, eyes closing

“You want to use the names from now on?” he asks quietly, Harrys light snores in the background

“I’d like that” you nod

Thank you for reading 💛

[sliebman10]

The Harry Star

(A little Sirius and Harry snippet brought on by the prompt 'telescope'. Harry is around 3 here.)

"Here...can you see now?" Sirius asked Harry after he adjusted the telescope so it was low enough for Harry to see through.

"Stars." Harry declared, a little pucker of concentration appearing between his eyebrows.

"Yup, there's so many," Sirius said, kneeling down next to him. "Sometimes there's special stars. Do you see one that's really bright? That one has the same name as me."

Harry giggled. "It does?"

"Yup. Everyone in my family was named after stars."

"Is there a Harry star?" Harry asked.

"Hmmm. Let's see," Sirius said, peering through the telescope himself. "Yes, I see it."

[charmsandtealeaves]

One More Sleep

Summary: A little Sirius and Remus raising Harry Christmas fluff. Three year old Harry is very eager to catch Santa Claus delivering him presents for the first time.

Words: 1K

Read it on AO3 or below the cut.

Sirius had tasked Remus with sneakily placing presents under their christmas tree and making their lounge room look like a jolly fat man had been to visit. Which left himself with the job of putting his eager godson to bed, and staying in said bed. Usually this task was a breeze as young Harry was always eager to please, however Sirius was quickly realising that he may have bitten off more than he could chew. After weeks of promising  and slowly convincing Harry that unlike at his aunt Petunia’s house where Santa never left gifts for him, at Padfoot’s he was 100% going to be able to open presents on Christmas morning it seemed the young lad had finally chosen to believe him. Which had prompted him in true mini marauder to want to catch Santa in the act of leaving presents under the tree. 

“Santa won’t come see you if you aren’t tucked up in your bed pal. That’s the rules,” said Sirius as he leaned down to give his godson a kiss on the forehead. 

Which was a custom he’d taken to do every night, knowing that Harry had received very little signs of affection during the few years he had lived under the Dursley’s roof. Which he had done for the year prior to Sirius winning custody in the muggle courts. When Sirius and Remus had first brought Harry home, he had been the quietest and most placid toddler either of them had ever met, especially considering their previous experiences had involved the Weasley boys. But finally after ten months living under their roof, Harry had started to push boundaries in true three year old fashion. 

“But Padfoot! You promised Santa would come no matter what!” Harry whined, wiggling so his blankets untucked from the sides of his bed. 

“He will buddy. So long as you’re in your bed.” Sirius shoved the sheets and covers back into place, only for Harry to wiggle his way out again.

“Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy”

“Well you might get covered in soot when he comes down the chimney,” he supplied. 

“When we go in the fireplace Uncle Moony just waves his wand. You can do it too!” Harry pleaded. 

“Santa might get a fright seeing you out of bed. We wouldn’t want to frighten him now would we?”

“We can hide!” 

Harry pulled his dad’s invisibility cloak out from under his covers. He’d taken to sleeping with it at night since Sirius had managed to get it back from an affronted Albus Dumbledore. Merlin’s pants, this kid had an answer for everything! Why had he had to inherit his fathers knack for mischief and his mother’s big brain?  

“I tell you what… Uncle Moony is like the mastermind when it comes to rules. So I’ll go ask him. But you stay here while I go ask okay?” 

This statement seemed to finally placate Harry, who fidgeted but stayed in his bed. Sirius made sure to lock his bedroom door with a silent charm for good measure as he took off down the corridor to find Remus. Absorbed in his task as ‘Santa’ Remus didn’t notice when Sirius frantically entered the room, constantly checking over his shoulder for a small boy who was getting very good with controlling his magic. 

“Moony we have a problem,” Sirius stage whispered. 

“Did he wet the bed again? His quidditch sheets are in his cupboard. I washed them earlier in the week.” 

“No… he wants to sneak out here and watch Santa leave his presents. I’m running out of answers to give him about why he can’t.”

“So let him.”

“What?!”

“Just come out here and sit with him under the cloak chances are he’ll probably fall asleep and we can just carry him back to bed. I can charm my hair and beard. It’s not a biggie Pads. Stop worrying,” Remus teased. 

Sirius raced back to the bedroom to find Harry standing on his bed, bouncing from foot to foot in anticipation. “What’d Moony say? What’d he say?!”

“Moony says so long as we stay really quiet and hide under the cloak we should be okay.”

Harry squealed with glee and jumped up and down on his bed excitedly clutching his invisibility cloak. Sirius picked him up off the bed and carried him in his arms through to the lounge room, where Remus was nowhere to be seen and the presents that had already been stacked under the tree had been covered with a disillusionment charm. He snuggled down into the big armchair Remus liked to read in and cuddled Harry in the crook of his arm. Harry draped the cloak over them, though it mostly just covered Sirius’ torso and head, his legs and feet sticking out the bottom. Harry’s body was entirely covered and that’s what counted. 

“Is Uncle Moony coming?” asked Harry.

“He’s in bed, sweet thing.”

“Is he feeling poorly again?” he asked worriedly, bottom lip wobbling. 

“Just a little bit. He’ll be okay tomorrow. Promise.”

Harry snuggled into Sirius and they watched the fireplace expectantly. Remus had let Harry help him earlier in the evening, set out a plate of chocolate biscuits for Santa and carrots for his reindeer, alongside a glass of milk on the mantelpiece. They waited a few minutes longer and the fireplace glowed green indicating someone was about to step out from the floo network. Sirius had to hand it to him, Remus was a genius, despite knowing it was him beneath the white hair, beard and ruby red overcoat Sirius hardly recognised him. Harry was purely delighted, clamping his hands over his mouth to try stop himself from making noise and kicking his legs excitedly in Sirius’ lap. 

They watched as Remus inspected their plat of offerings, dunking a biscuit in milk and tucking the carrots into his coat pocket, green tendril ends sticking out. Then he moved to the tree where he revealed the presents, Sirius assumed his wand was tucked up under his oversized sleeves somewhere. He turned to the invisible Harry and gave him a small wink and a tip of his hat before climbing back into the fireplace and disappearing again in a roar of green flame. 

“Did you see! Padfoot! Padfoot!” 

“I did. Now come on you off to bed. We can open presents in the morning with Uncle Moony when he wakes up.”

“Okay!” Harry cried and raced off towards his bedroom.