#sister shark bait

[jackhornersimp]

[blueiight]

Coming slowly to know his evil, or being catapulted into it ... was all the same. I wanted none of it finally. And, deserving nothing better, I closed up like a spider in the flame of a match. And even Armand who was my constant companion, and my only companion, existed at a great distance from me, beyond that veil which separated me from all living things, a veil which was a form of shroud. (IWTV, 1976)

[monstrousproductions]

Hi! Sorry to bother you, but I had just finished the latest tsv episode and. well first of all I wanted to congratulate you on the absolute stellar performance of getting drowned. Very disturbing (overwhelmingly positive)

I can't stop thinking about why Rane would get in the water with a shark. You knew he tried to drown himself before and now you stand before him (the other Faulkner, his warped reflection, the bride to his trawlerman) and he's asking you to get in, it's fine, the water isn't even that deep here!

The faith! The trust! Like Faulkner said, it's eating them all but he's the only one awake to hear the bones crunch. I truly believe Rane expected him to do something unhinged in that pool, but either trusted him enough to believe the katabasian bait or thought themself physically able to overwhelm him should the need arise. Except they didn't know he's done that before! How could they? And they still tapped his arm even when they knew he had murdered Mason.

The anglerfishery of it all.

This is the best death for Rane I could imagine. They're one of my favourite characters: a pragmatic fanatic, so terribly faithful and treacherous at the same time, utterly fascinating in their devotion.

I wish that when Faulkner looked down at Rane through the mirror of the surface, he finally saw something other than his own face. I don't think that's the case though, and that, too - him taking away their personhood during the last moments of their life, is part of Rane's tragedy. This is his revenge - for killing Carpenter, for making him into a hollow mouthpiece, for pulling him out of that tank. And they're not even allowed to die as Rane - they die as Charlie, as Faulkner 2, as Mason, as sister Thurox. Terrible! I love it!

Sorry for the ramblings. I just really, really enjoyed Rane. Once again congrats!

No need to apologise, I'm certainly not going to complain about people messaging me to be nice about my performance! Thank you so much 💖

Honestly I think Jon deserves so much praise for Rane - all his characters feel so rich, even if we don't see that much of them "on screen" so to speak. It's easy to feel like even the relatively small roles in TSV are fully realised, fleshed-out people with rich inner lives, even if we never really see that side of them. And I think he's made a show that invites you engage in that if you want to, so that you can approach Rane and ask what their motivations are and why they might make the choices they do, and have fun chewing on that.

Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, and again for being so kind about the performance! I loved playing Rane, can't wait to revive the character in The Tequila Verses, the upcoming TSV spin-off sit-com set in Rane's crab-themed, beachfront cocktail bar they open after surviving Faulkner's attack.

[ok-rookie]

Note to self: Do not watch Under Paris after eating breakfast.

So, yeah, my sister and I watched Under Paris on Netflix and it was certainly an experience. Spoilers under the cut if you haven't watched it.

This is probably messy because I jotted this down before my mind locks onto something else that catches my interest. I'm no movie expert so take this with a grain of salt. The last shark movies I watched prior to this were Bait (at the ripe age of 8) and The Meg (13), so not really an avid fan of the genre.

I get scared shitless because of the gore so I don't know why I decided to watch with my sister. Anyways, diving into it, I love the soundtrack and the cinematography. The plot is hypothetical – sharks in Paris. It wasn't really obnoxious since they did have an explanation for it. The possibility of sharks adapting to freshwater isn't impossible (bull sharks can do it, why can't other species?) – plus, the movie doubled down on it with the climate change and pollution and the fact that Lilith evolved. If situations were dire, animals would do anything to survive. I just found it funny that Lilith decided to find refuge in the same place as Sophia.

The catacombs scene with the activists were.. something. The sheer panic and the literal bloodbath was where it picked up. You can't have a shark movie without people getting torn to shreds, am I right? I found it funny that my younger sister only complained about the deaths while my overloaded ass was horrified for my life. They said that Mika should've lived so she can face the consequences of her actions, saying that her dying first was the easy way out. Honestly, I agree. I was curious to see what her character development could've been because she caused the deaths of her girlfriend and so many people.

Anyways, basically, the triathlon ends in disaster, the Seine blew up and now the entire world is infested in sharks. That's it, that was the ending. It's hypothetical in a sense, but in a way it seems realistic and was probably what gained its appeal (it's Top 1 in Netflix as of today). Although there were a few plot holes here and there, like how would a shark magically sneak into the Seines and how it would know that artillery shells can blow up, but I still enjoyed it nonetheless.

So yeah, that's my ramblings on Under Paris.

[canis-rex-lupus]

PSYCHONAUTS SPLATOON HEADCANONS PART 3?!?!?!?!?! this one's for the INTERNS!!!

🐙 also im using squid emojis as dividers for an easier viewing experience now

NORMA NATIVIDAD

norma would be an octoling, and she'd main whatever's "meta defining" at the time instead of just picking a weapon she thinks is neat. what's the point if it's not the best!!

she has main character syndrome i think. she's EXTREMELY bossy and takes the game too seriously. she orders around her team (take the left flank!! cover me while i get the rainmaker!! nooo don't go over there i need you over here defending!!!!) and her instructions are almost always geared toward her getting her teammates to clear a path for her to take all the glory...it never quite goes well. she insists it's her genius planning and direction that gets her team to win matches but she couldn't be more wrong. she also probably blames her teammates when stuff goes wrong. you didn't coordinate well enough!! you didn't listen!!

her favorite mode is rainmaker and her locker is actually pretty neat looking. she shows off all her perfect gear in there and would probably have some of the amiibo items too. she's B- rank.

🐙

LIZZIE NATIVIDAD

lizzie is also an octoling causeee sisters! she'd be a skirmisher/slayer and be really good at baiting other players into unsafe situations where she or someone else on her team can splat them easily. SCARY good at getting people to tunnel and commit too hard to trying to fight her and not realize it till they're already respawning. she'd main something aggressive but mobile so she can get away easy, like octobrush. oh my GOD would she be infuriatingly good at sharking. comes out of nowhere and you're dead before you can blink.

i don't think she takes the game very seriously at ALL, polar opposite of norma, so she never really tilts or blames anyone when she loses. it's just a loss. she might be a sore winner though. i can see her being the type to make fun of her opponents like LMAOOO look at this loser on the jet squelchers aiming at the ground 💀 who let this kid play

anyways her fav mode would be tricolor battle. shes built different like that. she's B+ rank and pokes fun at norma about it sometimes.

🐙

SAM BOOLE

sam is an inkling, she plays slayer. blaster main. she. is. terrifying. she's the one who averages like 20 kills per game. she's the one picking off anyone who dares to touch the rainmaker or step onto the tower or make a single power clam. she is an unstoppable force. i don't think it comes from a place of Intense Focus And Practice though. she strikes me as the type of player to sorta just zone out and have fun without thinking too hard about it, and everyone keeps asking what strats she uses to be able to pull off all the insane plays she does and she just. shrugs.

i think her and raz as a slayer/skirmisher duo would be a force to be reckoned with, like, you see these two together on the enemy team and you're DOOMED. coach oleander is so proud of sam's natural killing machine talent but also a little bit terrified.

her favorite mode is turf war cause it's nice and straightforward. her locker is one of the less mainstream colors like brown or maybe that dark teal color, and it's thoughtfully decorated with cool stickers and stuff. there's definitely one of those furbies in there. very eclectic decor but she makes it work for suresies. she's rank A+. i think she would play salmon run a LOT as well just cause she thinks the salmonids are neat looking.

🐙

GISU NERUMEN

gisu gives me more inkling vibes even though octoling might fit her hair better. seems like the kinda player who doesn't really care about weapon roles and just goes for whatever feels the most fun to play. i think she'd play reeflux! there's a lot of cool stuff you can do with that weapon and potential for lots of trick shots. she'd be sort of like sam and lizzie in that she's pretty easy-going while playing, but i don't think she'd be immune to tilting, especially not when they're 30 seconds away from winning and the other team pulls some insane play that completely turns the tables. she doesn't hold onto a loss for long though and she's pretty good about getting back on track.

she'd totally be the type of player to post a million clips of her getting wipeouts or narrowly escaping getting splatted or those aformentioned trick shots btw. she lives for those highlight compilation worthy moments.

i think she'd be around rank A+ and her favorite mode might beeee... tower control. her locker would either be super sick or she'd use it to do one of those silly jokes with the moai head.

🐙

MORRIS MARTINEZ

morris strikes me as an inkling type fella. i think he wouldn't really like the stress of the front lines and would rather play an anchor weapon. something swagful like e-liter. he'd be convinced that the song that plays during matches affects his performance. of course we lost, they were playing headhammer. of course i did crazy good that round, they were playing ska-blam!!! (i'm the same actually. i always play well when a yoko and the gold bazookas song is on.) he's a pretty chill player but definitely gets put off by spikes in difficulty and might take long breaks from matches altogether because "the other teams are way too sweaty."

he'd probably range from C+ to A- rank at any given time depending how much he's bothered to play that season. his favorite mode would be splat zones since it's one of the less crazy ones, easier to follow what's going on. while gisu would only maybe probably do a joke locker, morris would TOTALLY do one But. he'd also decorate the outside properly so it's both silly and cool.

🐙

ADAM JOSEPH GETTE

octoling. or frankly... if we want to get devious and break the rules... inktoling?!?!?! like morris he's not so aggressive, but instead of it being because he can't handle the front lines i think it would be that he just has more fun playing support. he'd probably main a few weapons, like n-zap '89, splat roller, and tenta brella. he would spend a loooot of effort putting good abilities on fashionable outfits so he can look just as fresh as he plays. he likes learning so he'd get an advantage in the game by absorbing a TON of information about the best ways to use specials, map strategies, weaknesses of other weapons, all that good stuff. he's the kinda guy that always shows up right when you need someone to cover you, and has probably saved a good amount of games by being on point with his support.

he's S rank so y'know he's kiiiind of a big deal... kind of a big shot... big cheese... top dog... he says this all jokingly but norma always fumes at it. his favorite mode? oohhh don't make him choose...they're all fun for their own reasons!! he'd spend lots of time decorating his locker, using the stickers to make funky designs with heavy consideration for the color scheme. he'd probably incorporate the newspaper-y mixed media style stickers from story mode in there somehow. it would have kind of a vintage feel?

[hannahhook7744]

'The Marvelous Misadventures of Hannah Hook' Moodboards (Revamped)(Part 4);

Liberty Edith Titan.

Age 14 years old.

Daughter of Arges the Cyclops and .

Cyclops and Back Up Carpenter of The Storm Bringer.

Family: Arges the Cyclops (Father),

(Mother).

Pet(s): None.

Hobbies: Wood carving, bug/insect collecting, painting, embroidery art, metal working, arson, playing games, playing ball, taking care of animals, weapon making, listening to music, fruit picking, dumpster diving, treasure hunting, carpentry, hunting, running, hiking, climbing, etc.

Weapon of Choice: Wooden Club.

She doesn't have magic but she does have inhumane strength and she's strangely good at mimicking people's voices.

Theme Song: "Roar."

Michelle 'Misty' Del Rey-Silver.

Age 16 years old.

Daughter of John Silver and Marina Del Rey.

Mermaid and Diver of the Storm Bringer.

Family: John Silver (Father),

Marina Del Rey (Mother),

Shania Silver (Sister).

Pet(s): None.

Hobbies: Dumpster diving, treasure hunting, diving, swimming, playing the bongos, swimming with the sharks, smoothie making, jellyfish catching, fishing, water fights, sea shell collecting, sand sculpture building, listening to music, dancing, exploring, playing games, Whale baiting, Jewelry making, sculpting/carving, tattooing, scavenging, racing, knitting, and story telling.

Weapon of Choice: Harpoon.

She has mermaid powers but not magic.

Theme Song: "Just the Way I Am."

D.E Anonymous.

Age 12-15 years old.

Daughter of Unknown.

Anonymous Helper of the Storm Bringer.

Family: Unknown.

Pet(s): None.

Hobbies: Singing sea shanties, dancing, parkour, hide n' seek, reading, playing cards, embroidery, sewing, writing, art, self designing, spying, babysitting, climbing, swimming, pickpocketing, and crocodile wrestling.

Weapon of Choice: Slingshot, Catapult, Canon, and Rocks.

It is unknown whether they have any magical abilities or powers. Oc is based on @dragoneyes618 .

Theme Song: "Secret."

Shan Bri.

Age 13 years old.

Daughter of Shan Yu and Xianniang.

Back Up Kid Wrangler of the Stormbinger Crew.

Family: Shan Yu (Father),

Xianniang (Mother),

Shan Desiree and Shan Deja (Sisters),

Shan Simon, Shan Shing, and Shan Shiro (Brothers).

Pet(s): Fernando (Succulent).

Hobbies: Archery, gardening, cooking, baking, various forms of art, sparring, playing games, wrestling, swimming, playing with fire, sword fighting, learning languages, surfing the web, horseback riding, rat trapping, hunting, etc.

Weapon of Choice: Bow and Arrow & Butterfly Knife.

It is unknown whether they have any magical abilities or powers. Oc is based on @mysticfables .

Theme song: "Warriors."

Tiger Khan.

Age 14 years old.

She was found and adopted by Shere Khan for unknown reasons, learned to talk from other isle kids, and was simply known by Tiger.

Translator of the Stormbringer Crew. 

Family: Shere Khan (Father).

Pet(s): None.

Hobbies: Drawing, Embroidery, Hunting, fishing, writing, reading, watching tv, vandalism, graffiti, dancing, swimming, parkour, climbing, cooking, sailing, photography, etc.

Weapon of Choice: Bone Knife and Knife Gloves.

They have no magic. Oc is based on @panthera-tigris-venenata .

Theme Song: "Welcome to the Jungle."

Fiona Freelend Foundling.

Age 8 years old. Abandoned/orphaned fairy child with dark wings that just popped up on the isle out of nowhere. No one knows who she really is.

She is the look out of the Stormbringer Crew.

Family: None/Unknown.

Pet(s): Bagul (Skunk).

Hobbies: Dancing, drawing, collecting stuffed animals/creepy things/bugs/silly bands/slap bands, acting , sewing, coloring, having tea parties, listening to music, trick or treating, playing dress up, knitting, meteorology, creative writing/poetry, arts and crafts, catching fire flies, acting, learning, and gardening.

Weapon of Choice: Bat Handled Sword.

They have fairy powers.

Theme song: "Hide and Seek."

Noah Sage Napoleon Bradford Aoratos.

Age 8 years old.

Son of Persephone and Hades.

Prince of the underworld and cabin boy of the Storm Bringer.

Family: Hades Aoratos (Father),

Persephone Athanasiou (Mother),

Melinoë and Makaria Athanasiou and Skia Aoratos (Full Blooded Sisters), 

Zagreus Athanasiou (Full Blooded [allegedly] Brother),

Hadie Aoratos (Twin Brother),

Treycor Fae-Aoratos, Alex Aoratos-Sinclair (Half Brothers),

Darcy Aoratos (Half Sister).

Pet(s): Cerberus the dog.

Hobbies: Playing in Haul's band, hide and seek, dress up, tye dying things, making flower crowns, playing house, running errands, braiding hair, making plants grow, watching cartoons, coloring, gardening, listening to music, singing, dancing, treasure hunting, dressing up his stuffed koala, tea parties, building minatures, collecting stuffed animals/bugs/silly bands/slap bands, acting, etc.

Weapon of Choice: Stygian Iron Sword.

He has demigod powers, can see ghosts/the dead, and has Persephone's abilities.

Theme Song: "I'm Just A Believer."

[rasshu-benaiokny]

Shark Bait (18+ Innuendo/ MDNI)

(Gyutaro X Rasshu Content / Forgotten Mermay Content sry yall / implied segg / or implied death/ both characters are above 20)

Its nighttime as the hazy moonlight shines down on the vast ocean down below. Like a bullet, a shark-like mermaid swims with purpose as she chases a small demonic mutation. This shark was a fabled huntress named Rasshu! She had a mission to finish as she caught up with the weak mutation, killing it with a single gash to the neck! Feeling the small demon’s body struggle in her jaws, she crunches down on its neck decapitating the enemy as recently, this “thing” got caught eating a mermaid near by…

The shark like woman swam in place as she looked at her wounds, her almond skin was bruised and cut as her blood wafted in the waters… she was tired after such a long chase that she didn’t seem to think about were she even was. Looking around the area, she saw nothing but bleached corals, thick weeds, and sharp rocks… no one was here and it gave she the shakes as she swam back from where she came. Unfortunately, she couldn’t recognize her area and with her blood seeping out more, she was getting weaker and colder by the second. Searching for civilization, the rough looking mermaid swam until the moonlight phased out from the heavy cloud up above… giving “him” a chance to pounce.

Rasshu looked up at the ocean sky as she waited fir the moonlight to show itself once again but then a sharp pain pricked her tail! Jolting upwards, she looked down with a harsh gaze as all she saw was groggy seaweed and dead coral around her, did she accidentally brush up against a broken piece? Carefully swimming towards the coral to inspect it, a plethora of thick tendrils shot out towards her , inwrapping her body as a scary sight crawled out from the dense coral reef; a fully grown demonic mutation!

The mutated merman eerily crawled from his hiding spot with a wide grin that poked at the sides of his face! His skin was rough and his body was malnourished beyond repair as he slowly dragged a finger across Rasshu’s smooth shark tail. This mutation was an octopus merman but his touch was somehow dry and frictional as his contorting tentacles grazed the woman’s body like sand paper! Looking into this thing’s eyes, this warrior knew who this was; he was the 6th strongest mutation that had a knack for preying on pretty weak merfolk, Gyutaro Shabana… After losing his little sister to a horrific accident, he gave up on life in his mid twenties to cause the same anguish he experienced so long ago.

Gyutaro grinned as he looked at such a rare catch! He never had the opportunity to eat a darker merfolk as they were quite rare in these frigid waters. He licked his lips as a hint of Rasshu’s blood flowed around his nose… The mermaid angrily growled as she put on a brave tone.

Rasshu: … You… You’re Gyutaro Shabana… the most illusive of the top mutations. you’re as ugly as the legends say huh… how sad.

Gyutaro: Look at you, talkn all big before your death? Aren’t ya scared of me? You know you are…

Rasshu, cockily: Scared? SCARED? The only thing Im scared of is your god awful stench sweets!…

Gyutaro: …you’re a fun one aren’t you… Mother said to never play with your food but too bad i don’t give a shit bout er… I know what! why don’t we have a bit of fun before i enjoy such a small and puny snack!

Her eyes narrow at his illusive threat, gurgling up a raspy laugh as he dragged the feisty shark down into his lonesome cave. He had seem to have a wonderful idea for this little brat of a warrior-

(•c•) hmm yea… thats as far as we go~ you can make the rest up; she got eated or she got fuckeded… either way, Rasshu is canonically into both because shes has a masochist thing going on! P.S. the ending would consensual if she doesnt get eaten but i reaaaly dont wann write smit cuz im bad at it I KNOW I AM)

[chimerafflesia]

top five ygo spinoffs characters?? 👀👀

CRACKS KNUCKLES i've been waiting for this one

5. KYOSUKE KIRYU my good friend from 5ds omg I love that bitch. he has the most insane character arc ever they bring him in and he's sick in the head then he dies in yusei's arms and then comes back as a cowboy actively trying to kill himself hes a father by the end of his cowboy arc ITS SO GOOD. also his dub name is so cute kalin kessler my good friend.

4. YURI YUGIOH ARC-V i've only know him for like 2 months but potentially the most me bait yugioh character to date. his color scheme is made up of my two favorite colors and he's a little cunt it's hilarious. HIS DECK ROCKS SO HARD I LOVE PREDAPLANTS and his ace starving venom fusion dragon she is so beautiful to me. hes only in like 30ish eps which is a damn shame cuz he's so good. they couldn't handle his power. also i've only heard clips of it but his dub voice is UNBELIEVABLE I think they told the VA to just do an asshole voice and he kills it it's amazing

3. KITE TENJO where do I begin. mr yugioh zexal rival he is incredible. yugioh always knocks it out of the park with big brother characters but kite might just be the best one his bond with hart is so sweet it makes me sob. he engineered a robot at like age 12 to help him take care of his brother and im :'). his deck is amazing #galaxyeyesphotonSWEEP and his character arc was so wonderful to watch. his dub voice is one of my favorites of all time he sounds PERFECT like genuinely when he appeared in arc-v it took me a while to get used to his sub voice. HE'S CATHOLIC. i think he's the first yugioh rival to die on screen. he's incredible. kite tenjo world domination

2. REGINALD "SHARK" KASTLE. THIS FUCKING GUY !!!! if we're talking about insane character arcs he is like top 5 that boy did it all. he's the rival he's the best friend he's a big brother he's the VILLAIN??? they put him through the war. he grew on me so so much as I kept watching and especially in zexal II he's incredible. there's so much i wanna say cuz they really did it all with him. his drive to protect his sister and those around him makes me sob like he's the most 14 year old of all time. acts like he doesn't care but jumps in line first to help out. he's sososo good. love shark to death

1. JADEN YUKI THE KING HIMSELFFFF my favorite yugioh protag he is so beloved to me. he's so sweet and has one of the most unreal character arcs of all time it's INSANE but so good. i'm a little biased cuz I love gx sosososo much but also that's the Jaden Yuki Effect he's wonderful. PIONEERED THE HERO ARCHETYPE. WHICH NOW HAS THE MOST CARDS OF ANY ARCHETYPE. he's just such a joy to watch anytime he's on screen and his growth throughout gx makes me cry like i was a mess the last few eps. being the first yugioh spinoff protag is not easy but he did it and he rocks so hard. i have such love in my heart for him

[blubushie]

JESUS, your dad got his head stuck between two boards? That must've been traumatizing, god, I can't imagine going through something like that! I get you're lenient with your blog but that needed a trigger warning or something! Give your father my deepest condolences... everything else is fine, though, I guess.

[Animal Fact Anon holy shit your dad is so cool, talk about a reputation like hello??? The fucking zebra shark?? 2x malaria?? Broken ribs and a collapsed lung???? Maybe 'cool' isn't the right word but ?!?!!]

Yeah he's a bit of a mad cunt and I'm cut from the same cloth. (Also he's glad you think he's cool—"At least someone does!")

Every bloke in the family is a little... off, really?

You've got:

• Me (I don't need to explain)

• Dad (don't need to explain)

• My younger brother who branded himself with the family cattle brand. I witnessed this when I was 12 because my brother is insane and decided his little brother with a medical special interest should witness and doctor his severe burn. He also lives in Texas. The branding thing has stuck with me enough that when I was a stockman and cattle were being branded I had to stay back because I couldn't watch it without getting queasy. Not cuz I felt bad or anything it's just that the smell of burnt hair and flesh brought back memories.

• My eldest brother who dances to Billie Jean at literally every fucking wedding he's been to for the past 30 years. Also he doesn't like me. His wife REALLY doesn't like me (she thinks I'm dangerous cuz I've taken the kids shooting). He just doesn't like me cuz our dad dumped his mum for mine and had me though, so I'm the kid who had it all (ignoring how the divorce left Dad in poverty so I also grew up in poverty WOOP)

• My maternal uncle who's an ARA antivax hippie vegan and hates me. Also he's gotten COVID more times than I can count so I avoid him like the literal plague. He gives me creepy vibes.

• My paternal uncle who, as a teenager, let his dog loose so it'd attack my aunt's dog just for an excuse to talk to her. Her dog damn near killed his dog. Then they started dating. His dog got a steak for being such a devoted wingman. This uncle also REALLY fucking hates lettuce and none of us know why but he will have an absoute meltdown if it touches food on his plate. No one, not even my aunt, has gotten an answer as to what the fuck's up with the lettuce thing.

• My youngest maternal cousin who was an alcoholic surfie who died of diabetes before he reached 25. He was convinced he'd die before he reached 25 but he literally drank and ate himself into an early grave knowing he couldn't be doing that shit with his diabetes. I have one memory of him showing me how to catch minnows with my bare hands, and I still use that trick for catching bait fish.

• My oldest maternal cousin who's a deadbeat dad and I hate him because he doesn't do right by his son or daughter. He's all they've got since their mum is institutionalised for mental issues. My aunt and uncle raise his kids while he lies on the couch smoking hooch all day (I really do NOT like him).

• My maternal second cousin who's nonverbal autistic, but both his deadbeat stoner dad and hippie antivax grandad refuse to get him tested. This boy suffers in school and my heart breaks for him. I had no idea what this kid looked like from 3-5 because he always wore an Iron Man mask all day every day, and he stopped speaking entirely around 6. He's now completely nonverbal and despite being about 13 years old he has the functionality of 6 year old. Last I saw him, he still tries to conversate with me when he sees me though, and he'll sit down and pet Misty and he knows I like talking so he'll pick from a few topics I write down for him and have me talk about them. He understands speech just fine, he just doesn't talk himself. And also really really really hates seatbelts so I knit him a seatbelt cover and now he uses them (turns out he just didn't like the raw edge of the belt). His little sister has some behavioural issues but she's genuinely a sweetheart and seems to be the only person who always knows what he's thinking, so she acts a mediator for him a lot.

• My paternal cousin everyone is convinced is either gay or autistic or a trans woman or all of the above. Him and I get on fine so I'm also on the bandwagon of That Boy Ain't Right cuz there's something in him I recognise, I just don't know what. Don't reckon he's a woman or gay though, and if there's anybody he'd come out to it's me cuz the family is conservative but he knows damn well I won't judge. I'm pretty sure he's just on the spectrum.

• My paternal nephew who's the only bloke what came out normal. He's going to uni in a few years and GOD do I hope he comes back normal. He's spoilt but he's a good kid.

[room-on-broom]

the game is: post the names of the files in your wip folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. let people send you an ask with the title of what most intrigued them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it. if you want, tag as many people as you have wips

I was tagged by @aandriskobold and in turn (no pressure or obligation!) I tag anyone who wants to do this, @teapotteringabout @itslacroixsweetiedarling @anarkyandmadness @heathtrash @scarletwoods @sgrumby @entguarde @dragonoffantasyandreality @womble1 @prince-lee25 @marvellouslymadmim

There are a LOT for bunch of fandoms so I'll pop them under a read more-!

/ =means theres two working titles

Thunderbirds OS and TAG

Hugs oclock

Sand in your Eye

Thirteen Hundred hours (taz 11th hour au)

Kings and Queens

Late night? Nah just crime-in als

Reduce Re-fuse Re crew cycle

Brothers Sister Robot men

War on the Roses

Fathers day/Here comes a thought

Mary Poppins

Cherry Tree Carol

Step out of time (doctor who x over)

OITN B- Make Things Right

Hunger Games

Effie the Avox.

The Drunk and the flower

Hope

Valley of the dolls

Requirements

Stingray

SEASICK

free (← became unshackled i just never changed it)

Put him in a jar and shake him

Your mother and mine/Barry Mine

Pomegranate seeds/Ancient Dreams in a modern land

Shark Bait (true V2) /Blood in the water.

Avoid the star (AU)

A mermaid's kiss

Life jacket (masterplan 2)

Sweet teeth/sweet Toof

Ask a busy Woman

Fucked with anchor ⚓️(land music)

Icarus

The Aquanaut's Girl

The Real Expert

Good riddance/ time of your life

Marina screams

Deep sea Explorers

Octopus Up

Good morning Lemoy

Seabirds

Strange tides (body swap au)

Captain Scarlet

Space Angels.

Not fit to fly

The Adventure Zone

Baller Cake

321 Rematch

NOT a coffee Shop AU

You have 7 seconds /taz master

Stage live

Blinded by the light

7th Bird Night (twelfth Night Au)

Much Ado about TAZ (MAAN Au)

Tiny Detective

Heart Attack

Worst Witch (98)

Look above the Thunder

Brambles and gorde (HBDrill Beauty and the beast AU)

Monsters

Bowling four Soup

Little bit

Froot

Finger smith

Millie's Alphabet

Happiness is...

Drowning lessons

Unfair Advantage

If you're reading this far Down I love you. Mind how you go

[vcnusians]

sorry i disappeared, i'm going through some serious shit right now. i don't wanna take up the dash but if you see this, please read it because i need all the advice i can get. this is a serious life or death thing. legal shit.

Saturday my boyfriend and I went to the beach, he had a beatbox and some captain morgan there but we left 3 hours later. we went to the mall for food and so i could use a restroom and when he was turning into a parking lot he made a little too wide a turn trying to avoid hitting the curb trying to turn in, and accidentally sideswiped a car that was in his blind spot, and the impact pushed him into another car that was turning out of the parking lot aisle. it was a really shitty situation but even I didn't see the first car on the right of us because i was looking to my right the whole time looking for a place to use the restroom. if i saw danger coming, i would've alerted him. i had to go use a restroom badly so i quickly got out of the car and found one, and i called him on the way so he knew i wasn't abandoning him or fleeing because he gets anxious and he was already scared to death. he wasn't answering his phone and i panicked thinking when i came back he'd be gone. thankfully his sister called me because she didn't know what was happening but he wasn't answering her calls either and she was worried, so i answered and told her what happened and i ran back through macy's and the whole shopping center and i panicked because several police cars were there blocking the whole entry, both parties were snapping pictures with their cell phones and he was sitting on the curb with his hands behind his back. then both parties involved in the accident left. they asked me questions and for my DL, but they didn't test me. and they didn't test anyone else involved in the collision. i told them what i experienced without lying and nothing i said could've gotten him in trouble. there was one cop who appeared to try and distract me from my boyfriend by asking me personal questions, how we met, where we both work, (how was that relevant? he didn't need to know) and i'm sure pumping me for info and dirt he could use against him and being a shark. i didn't take the bait and just "chit chatted" with irrelevant silly stupid things. then they made him take the field sobriety test... not giving him an option to consent or decline... and then they arrested him and took him in the cop car... and the look he gave me when they cuffed him was absolutely gut wrenching, it just broke my heart and i was doing so well keeping my cool no matter how fucking terrified i was but when he looked at me in tears and mouthed "i'm so sorry, i love you", i lost it and started crying.

but here's the thing. they refused to tell him his BAC which is deceptive and also wrong, and they did not test him again when they took him back to the station. they violated his rights by doing that, which can actually be in his favor because they didn't want evidence that he was okay so they could get away with charging him. but can they charge him for DUI with insufficient evidence? also it was pretty weird how both other parties in the accident weren't tested or questioned, they just snapped pics with their cell phones and left so quickly. nobody in the incident was injured. they separated us and wouldn't let us talk to each other, i tried to say something reassuring and a cop asked my name, barked at me and called me out harshly in front of everyone, 2 other guys came and tried to make me get off the curb when they took him in the cop car with handcuffs and when i walked by a cop blocked him so we couldn't make eye contact. i don't know if the guys were civilians or undercover cops but they made me go into starbucks and got me a water and left me there. today he called the DMV for an administration hearing to fight for his license and his mom found a lawyer this morning and made an appointment for them to talk to him at 2 p.m. but it's 5:20 and i haven't heard from him and i'm honestly freaking out but anyway.

i'm so nervous i'm sick to my stomach and i want to scream. i'm so, so afraid of him going to jail, i don't want to lose him but something tells me they're not gonna go easy on him and i've never been more scared of anything in my life. he's a good person, he's the sweetest soul with the biggest heart and he may have done something really stupid by driving drunk but he doesn't deserve this.

what chance does he have? we're in california. could the cops' failure to test him a second time be in his favor? does anyone have any information that could help?

[tortoisesshells]

1, 3 and 4 for the writing excerpt meme? :D

1. ... that makes me smile:

Customs doesn't usually have much for anyone to smile about, and they're five minutes away from an extraordinarily loaded conversation about justice, but for now, Nellie thinks Ursa Minor looks like a goose:

“Well, your education was likely significantly more comprehensive on this score than mine, Commodore.” “Undoubtedly. But Nellie, I really cannot see a goose.” She sighed, and glanced up at him. “If you are determined to laugh at me –” “I am not laughing –” “James.” “I am not laughing now,” he amended, “I am curious. What you see is what you see. I cannot tell you that you are wrong there.” “If you promise,” she said, and raised a hand to gesture at the sky, again. “There, the North Star. That’s the head. Those little stars arcing behind it are the long neck. The little box – the one with the other bright star in the lot, I don’t know it’s name but you see it, there? – that’s the body of the thing. I suppose I’ve been imagining that its wings are folded in – that it’s paddling about on some mill pond in the sky.” When described in this way, it did resemble a goose peering into the shallows for food. James said so, and Nellie, limited by the darkness as his perception of her was, fairly preened.

3. ... that encompasses my style:

Answered here, but: I don't usually do kid/adolescent narrators, but this passage from had you not better make One of us does have my usual belaboring of historical detail for characterization, and a character playing chicken and losing with their own emotions and memory. Also, I do think this one of my better attempts at Elizabeth from POTC at any age:

She frowned at this – why on earth would a man not want to travel? Instead of being stuck in a great dreary northern place which (Elizabeth glanced over at her father’s prized globe, finding this Massachusetts Bay by the great ungainly sweep of a cape that always put her in mind of a prize-fighter’s arm) probably had bears and snow. She had not seen the latter in some two years, and did not miss it at all – she had never seen a bear, though, since Papa had a weak constitution and tended to faint at the sight of blood, which meant for all her pleading she’d never seen the baiting-pits in Paris Garden in London – or anywhere else, besides. She had seen a bear skull once, in one of her father’s friend’s curio-cabinets, between curious-looking coins of long-dead Roman emperors and rocks that man had (in a superior tone which immediately made Elizabeth lose interest) called glossopetrae. Someone later told her that those hand-sized rocks they were ancient shark-teeth, which had set her to staring at the inscrutable waves with fear and fascination. But she was ignoring the conversation, which she ought not to do – she was something like the lady of the house, even though she was too young for the position she’d inherited when Mama had – “Then your family is in Massachusetts Bay?” she asked quickly, to stem the unwelcome thoughts she’d just had.

4. ... with dialogue I'm proud of:

Answered here, but! Love a character who says outrageous things with a smile. From another shoreline, in another life:

Roger snorted. “It’s the fire for us, Vicki. You might as well find your comfort where you can.” She glanced at him, chewing at her lip for a half-moment. “Ought I to – take one of the other rooms?” “Don’t be ridiculous. Take advantage of the foresight of our ancestors and stay by the stove.” “I’d like to lie down.” He looked at her, unsure at first, and then – entertained. “And you would rather a door be between us? You are taking this journey into the past very seriously. It’s not 1866.” Vicki demurred, feeling as though she had to explain herself, but not finding the words for what she meant to say. She was his sister’s employee – his son’s tutor – she’d need another job after this one, whenever that was. None of it was very articulate, and she watched miserably as Roger add another log to the stove. “If it distresses you that much,” he said, looking over his shoulder at her, with an expression she could not have parsed even in the frank light of day, “I will take one of the other rooms. Though – I’m not enough of a gentleman not to ask for your coat.”

send me a number and I'll share an excerpt of my writing!

[rhetoricandlogic]

Liberty’s Daughter by Naomi Kritzer

By: Eric Hendel

Issue: 15 January 2024

Naomi Kritzer’s novel Liberty’s Daughter is a book that I both loved reading, and also a story which I think falls short of its full potential. Based in part on a series of shorter works written by the author (all of which have here been compiled into a larger narrative), Kritzer’s novel centers around the experiences of Beck Garrison, a sixteen-year-old girl who, along with her father, lives on a scattered network of artificially created islands and repurposed cruise ships known as a seastead. Set in an ambiguously dystopian near-future world, the novel introduces us to the six nations of the seastead, which was originally constructed by libertarian activists seeking to create what they falsely conceptualized as a utopian society valuing personal liberty above all else.

As the novel opens, the seastead has persisted in an ambiguous legal state for nearly forty-nine years. While the mainland United States government refuses to acknowledge this society’s independence (pointedly calling its embassy on the seastead not an embassy but an institute), it has also paradoxically neglected to arrest the many well-known corporate criminals who have fled here to avoid prosecution for their crimes. Over the course of Liberty’s Daughter, Kritzer uses this setup to explore contrasting articulations of human rights and social responsibilities, with the seastead slowly revealed to be an intensely authoritarian community in its own right.

All of this is introduced alongside a more subtle storyline, in which Beck’s realization of the true nature of the seastead’s views of human rights tracks alongside her gradually expanding understanding of the context in which her father brought her to live in this community. This latter development follows on from Beck’s decision to begin slowly reconnecting with her estranged mother, whom her father previously claimed had died years earlier. In this way, she eventually comes to recognize not only the truth of the seastead and the many ways in which its libertarian ideology fails, but also the precarity of her own privileged status within this self-described utopia.

The main plot of Liberty’s Daughter begins with a self-contained story that effectively introduces the novel’s themes. Beck is working as a “finder” (a person who is hired to negotiate trades on the seastead for hard-to-find commercially manufactured goods) when she is contacted by an indentured bond worker named Debbie Miller. While Beck is normally hired only by people hoping that she can find rare items for them, like slippers and bathing suits, Debbie has instead reached out to Beck in the hope that she will track down her missing sister, Lynn.

Having previously contracted a mysterious illness which prevented her from working, Lynn vanished shortly after asking her bond-holder on the seastead for a loan so she could pay to be seen by a doctor. Since then, everyone on the seastead to whom Debbie has spoken has claimed to know nothing of Lynn’s whereabouts, with Lynn’s bond-holder himself refusing to speak to Debbie at all. As Beck reflects immediately after hearing of this situation:

I had a bad feeling about this. My job is finding things, but normally that just means finding willing sellers for interested buyers. That’s why I was looking for the sandals. Finding a person was a whole different kettle of shark bait. But the seastead wasn’t that big, so unless she’d fallen over the side and drowned … I pulled out my gadget to take notes. “Okay,” I said, and keyed in the name. “What else can you tell me?” (p. 11)

This search draws Beck into a loosely connected sequence of overlapping objectives, all of which in turn coalesce into a larger story. Initially intent only on locating Lynn and verifying her safety, Beck soon discovers that the bond that allowed Lynn to live on the seastead has been sold to a “skin farm”—a dangerous factory whose impoverished workers routinely die due to exposure to chemicals normally outlawed. Worse still is that this factory is located on one of the seastead’s most infamous islands—a decaying cargo ship called Liberty (or “Lib” for short) whose residents abide by the single all-encompassing law that their exclusively capitalist society has no laws at all.

This brief story is resolved when, unwilling to simply abandon Lynn to her fate, Beck chooses to call upon the help of a private militia in Lib called the Alpha Dogs—a group for whose services her father had previously purchased a security subscription. In a scene which almost comes across as deliberately anticlimactic, Beck simply walks into the skin farm in which Lynn is being held captive, and, under the protection of the Alpha Dog bodyguard she has hired, commands that Lynn be set free. Critical to this scene is the exact manner by which Beck manages to free Lynn, and the exchange that occurs when she does so:

She was chained to the workbench. “Can you get her loose?” I said to my bodyguard. He gave me a look. “I’m hired to protect you. She is not on my contract.” “Yeah?” I walked over and grabbed her arm. “Lynn, will you give me the honor of your company? Say yes.” “… Yes?” “Lynn is my date and my contract specifies that you will provide protection services for me and my date at all times. And I want you to get us out of here.” (p. 38)

This scenario functions as an encapsulation of the themes that the entire novel explores. The way in which Beck frees Lynn (by extending the terms of the bodyguard’s contract onto her) reveals the vast gulf that exists between this libertarian society’s claimed values of personal freedom and autonomy and the reality of how these values manifest. Beck is only capable of entering the skin farm because of the bodyguard whom she has personally hired; having a member of a privately-funded militia at her side is all that allows her to move through this space without question. By contrast, Lynn is indicated to have spent the last two weeks chained to a desk in this same factory, unable to leave due to an outstanding medical debt that she had no choice but to incur. Even in this scenario, Beck’s bodyguard at first refuses to free Lynn by claiming he has no right to do so due to the terms of his contract; he only agrees to do what Beck says when she changes the situation so as to better meet those terms. While this is a community whose citizens claim to have no laws, the actions of Beck and her bodyguard reveal that the society abides by at least one: that the only rights which anyone has are those that can be forcibly extracted from the lives of others.

This examination of the limitations of the seastead’s ethos continues as the book progresses, with Kritzer’s novel quickly giving way to less a single narrative thread than a fascinating sequence of loosely connected subplots and self-contained story arcs which require that Beck directly engage with the entrenched social inequity of the seastead’s community.

After she has freed Lynn from the skin farm, there is a strange but also unexpectedly fascinating story in which Beck is recruited by the producer of a reality television program from the mainland United States. While working as this woman’s assistant, Beck comes in turn to serve a vital if indirect role in an emerging labor movement amongst bond workers like Debbie and Lynn. In the process of this work, Beck witnesses a bizarre inversion of the seastead’s libertarian philosophy when the producer of the program tries offering her employees healthcare, only to then be threatened by the leader of the entire seastead due to the dangerous precedent he fears this act will set. There is also, later on, an extended story depicting the outbreak of a mysterious plague originating from one of the seastead’s unregulated nanotech research facilities, with Beck and several of her friends desperately working to distribute a vaccine to the seastead’s overly paranoid citizens. Eventually the book concludes via a legitimately fascinating final act wherein what little governmental infrastructure the seastead previously possessed collapses. Beck and others subsequently begin working to rebuild their society, and in the process start replacing its libertarian, capitalist ethic with something more holistic and inclusive.

My main problem with Liberty’s Daughter is that, as engaging and creative as the book’s story is, there are also several critical junctures at which I think that Kritzer fails to fully explore the implications of this narrative. Instead, in these moments the novel pulls back from the events it is depicting and shuts down any further exploration of the issues its story has introduced, in a way that feels extremely artificial.

One example of this emerges in the conclusion to the story of Lynn’s escape from the skin farm. Initially simply expecting Lynn to go to the American Embassy so she can formally request asylum, Beck learns that a drug charge in Lynn’s past makes this option impossible for her. This is a crime which the book explicitly verifies to the reader is so minor as to be nonexistent, and yet because of this charge—and what it apparently means for Lynn’s future if she ever returns to the United States—she chooses to remain on the seastead in spite of the danger she now knows she faces. This is a plot point that is then abandoned as the story continues, with Lynn simply vanishing from the chapters that follow, and Beck—despite her prior desire to rescue Lynn—appearing strangely uninterested in contemplating how an excessively punitive criminal justice system has forced this woman to place her life in undue danger.

A similar issue emerges in the ending of the book itself. After a cholera outbreak leaves what little social infrastructure the seastead had previously possessed in shambles, a humanitarian group arrives to administer aid to the sick and injured. It’s in this way that Beck is unexpectedly reunited with her mother, Lenore, who has traveled to the seastead with this group. Here, after learning that Beck’s father has fled from the seastead (abandoning his daughter in the process), Lenore reveals the context in which her former husband, Paul Garrison, emigrated to the seastead: he kidnapped a four-year-old Beck after attempting to arrange for his wife’s death in a traffic accident. Lenore then claims custody over Beck against her will, and, in an act that leaves her daughter feeling both disillusioned and betrayed, forces her to leave the seastead for good. The book ends with a scene in which Beck and her mother begin planning a road trip, with Beck herself seemingly forgetting the sense of betrayal she had felt—and the ways in which her mother’s actions mirror the very same exploitative reduction of human rights which had marred so much of the seastead’s society.

Moments like this, while initially appearing minor, function to dampen many of the more pressing questions which Liberty’s Daughter raises. Just as Lynn’s decision to risk her life to remain on the seastead is an act which clearly exists within a still larger context that the book refuses to explore, Lenore’s decision to take Beck away from the seastead against her will raises the possibility that the flaws of the seastead’s exclusionary conceptualization of human rights are far more widespread. Beck’s mother, despite having never adhered to this libertarian ideology, ultimately ends this book by exerting a control over Beck’s life that seems to exist purely for her own sake—a desire to spend the last two years of Beck’s childhood living in a very traditional family setting, regardless of what her daughter has to say about this.

Yet rather than allowing these moments to exist in the story as points of ambiguity, they end up being pushed aside. Liberty’s Daughter ends with Beck and her mother going on a hike together. Even the book’s final line has Beck asking her mother if they can go on a road trip to the Grand Canyon, and Lenore answering, with a laugh, that Beck can go wherever she wants. Yet this moment feels hollow due to how it contrasts with Lenore’s actions: there is at least one place where she will apparently not allow her daughter to go, and, as the novel has demonstrated, it’s a very important one.

[secretsuitcasefanskeleton]

Stand User: Nico Merlai

Stand Name: Barracuda

Abilities: Earth-shattering screeching (50ft), blade fins, healing abilities, specializes Muay Thai.

Tarot Card: Queen of Cups; emotional, caring, and devine femininity

Nico is a 19 year old girl who attended a university in Australia as a freshman, but had to drop out to travel to Singapore as requested from her father, in another country for work, to look for her younger half sister, Anne, and return her to her mother. When arriving to the Singapore lands, she noticed five big men around her sister causing her to panic, vigilantly sneaking behind them and calling out her stand, but before they could react, she began to ask Anne who the men were. After the five notice her stand, they're immediately put on the defensive themselves, but not too much seeing as how she didn't know who they were herself, bringing the older Joestar to reply in efforts to calm her down and explain to Nico, who then circled behind Anne getting a better look at the five six foot men. She noticed they all had summoned strange ghosts of their own as well. Or what the older man had called them, 'stands', but what they would have assumed to be a friendly gesture, actually caused Nico to panic and guard in front of Anne protectively with her awaiting stand. It's wasn't until the older Joestar retreated his stand and mentioned desperately that they were on a mission for his daughter and that they had no bad intentions for Anne. They were actually glad that Nico had shown up so they could get rid of the girl. It wasn't until Avdol had pulled Joseph aside to suggest an idea; bring Nico along. Her stand was extraordinarily visible, meaning it must've had immense power. She could help. Though Joseph knew it was going to be no easy task to convince the girl to join, he agreed. Getting back to the group with the fortune teller not far behind, Joseph cuts to the chase explaining in further detail about his daughter's condition, why they were there, and what they were planning to do. After he finished, Nico apologized about the condition of his daughter, but proceeded to ask what it had to with her and what he hoped to gain by telling her this, which led to Joseph asking if she could join them on the trip to Egypt, to defeat a man called DIO. She apologized once more, for there was truly nothing she could do. She wasn't going to risk her life to go and fight a battle with a couple of men she had just met. For all she knew, they could've just been saying that to lure her alone and do God knows what, besides It all sounded too far-fetched. Her top priority was Anne anyway, no one else. It wasn't until Polnareff had mentioned, as-a-matter-of-factly, that if it weren't for Jotaro, the big mass of quiet and foreboding presence, Anne would have been "shark bait" and "no longer with us". Taken aback by the news, Nico then turned frantically to her younger sister to confirm what she'd hope to be a fable, but to her disappointment Anne agreed, nodding casually in approval that that's exactly what would've happened if it weren't for the edgy teen. Nico stood in contemplation, turning around from the group to ponder. If it weren't for Anne's need of constant attention, they wouldn't be in this predicament in the first place, but yet here they were. She can't undo the past, so there's no point in dwelling on it now. She could always say no, but she would regret that decision later on in the future too. These men that she just met, would they really put their lives on the line for her sister, a random twelve year old girl who they just met? It seemed so. That settles it then. Nico turned back around to face the hopeful men, a grateful and kind smile on her face as she reached her arm out for a hand shake to the one who did all of the talking. "A life for a life, it's only fair. You have my word, I'll help you defeat this DIO!" There wasn't much said after that, but the determined smiles on everyone's faces spoke loud enough. This all seemed too far-fetched, but then again, she did exist in a world of 'stands'.

[talesfromsiteredacted]

Random Grabbag of Interesting Threats and Insults Heard at Site (REDACTED)

Various and sundry threats overheard around site, some directed at the staff, some at the anomalies, some at the Chaos Insurgency. Some are from the anomalies. Hell, I've got a few here. There's rumor about a Most Inventive Threat competition starting. No context, just hostility.

"I swear, if you start in with the singing again... I'm going to cut out your vocal chords, nail them to the front gate, add a warning sign, and spread the word far and wide the Viking penalty for raping eardrums applies here."

"Whomever decided Doctor Bright was Site Command material is gonna get a very special lemon basket, with combustible citrus."

"You're going to get cheesed, mate." "Cheesed?" "Like getting creamed, but a longer, more involved, and more agonizing process. With knives possibly involved."

"Wow... in the D&D game of life, you rolled a nat 1 on not just intelligence, but wisdom and charisma too."

"Keep staring at my sisters like that. I'll show you the Sumerian Cheese Grater trick."

"Keep pushing. Heard Ferdinand would just love a dinner date with you. One more comment like that, and I'll butcher, cook, and serve him your corpse."

"Wanna find out what happens when an idiot gets thrown in a miniature black hole? Keep asking 'When's lunch?' and you'll get firsthand experience."

"Why do you make easy-peasy lemon squeezy into hard hard lemon impossible?"

"Clef... touch my dark roast again, I'll shoot you with your own shotgun."

"Mock Dr. Kondraki again, you'll find out why butterflies can be terrifying."

"This. Is. Why. You. Leave. The. Keters. Alone. Now, piss off before I spank you again with your own baton, kid."

"Meh. You may have top clearance, but you don't have friends, and you don't have taste."

"The Keter? Nah, your willy isn't even Euclid." A pause. "Really weird thing to call your dong, Doctor Bright."

"What do we do with a drunken Bright? Lock him in the brig, and turn a very cold hose on him, of course."

"Interrupt my work once more, and I will be forced to suture your mouth shut."

"Those bastards! I'm going to carve their livers out with a rusty dull spoon!"

"It shouldn't be possible to play a ukulele with malicious intent, but here comes Clef, proving me wrong. One more super slow Tom Petty song, he'll be wearing that damn ukulele as a necktie."

"I could put a sack of manure through 914 on rough and get a better argument than that."

"The Chaos Insurgency must love stupid people, there's so many. Either that, or they need to start using a better temp agency."

"You call this coffee? I call this a mug of disappointment."

"Say it. You'll be eating Tuna Surprise slurries for weeks." A pause. "Why Tuna Surprise slurries? You'll be missing all your teeth."

"Huh. Surprised you can even breathe with your head so far up your own ass."

"Jeremy. My dude. You. Reek. You're out here, smelling like one of 682's chili farts, unwashed, ungroomed, uneducated... and you want a piece of my cake? Hah. Until you rediscover the wonders of a shower and soap, you ain't even touching my ladyfingers."

"Listen to me, Leonard... there is no place in the entire fucking mulitverse where I would find your creepy ass attractive. Now, fuck off before I treat you like a lich, you worthless wreck. You got no game, and lo! No maidens. Maybe 073 can teach you 'Not Being a Creep 101', you need it. Get the fuck out of here, pathetic maidenless wretch!"

"Big Brother told me about this thing he did to a guy with a wire waistcoat and a bicycle pump. Thinking of trying it on a certain annoying doctor."

"Put another fish in the damn fountain. I'll pulverize you with a trout."

"Dr. Gears... I know you're trying to set a good example, but right now you look like a poster for 'The Horrors of Insomnia and Overwork'. You need a long ass nap, boss."

"Grr. The Chaos Insurgency, can't stop them, but can't round them up, push them into a meat grinder, and use them as mutated shark bait."

"Okay... someone get Dr. Glass up here. Dr. Clef is delusional again. He just said Dr. Bright had a good idea. That's not possible."

"Wow. Contracting 008 might actually make this moron into a mere fool."

"I'm not sure if I should hit you with a shovel, shove a live snake up your ass, or just throw you in the incinerator."

"I'd sooner gnaw my own leg off and beat myself to death with it instead of have even a cup of coffee with you. Go away, Karin."

[weekend-whip]

Olivia seems like she’d be quite the heartbreaker in her Highschool years. Any of the gang gotten asked out? Do they have a lot of people who like them?

Kai: Back in his Freshman year (during the two months he was actually there, ha) he went to a lot of parties with Chad's group and wound up with a couple of prospects that never lasted long or really went anywhere, but he has been on a few dates (a man in high demand!!!) And of course, there's the whole thing with Meghan. And there's Jay who's obviously moved on from his short-lived crush but is still horrendously embarrassed about it

Jay: Being relatively unpopular the first few years, the only person crushing on him besides Nya is/was Sunni. She did desperately want to ask him out, but couldn't find the nerve until it was already too late. Maybe she'll get another chance down the line, brief though it may be. Who knows?

Cole: He did have a lot of eyes on him prior to the Dodgeball Incident (...and not counting Jesse lmfao). While he hasn't had as many people approaching him as Kai, he was still on plenty of people's radars, so he's got some experience too, he's just far more lowkey about it. Post-Incident that all started to fade though, which...didn't really help his esteem very much.

Zane: No, not really. Primarily for how much he keeps to himself due to giving off a "weird" first impression. He has one person that has been interested in him in such a way *cough* Cole *cough* but still winds up being a heartbreaker when he's finally following his own pursuits to the point that it causes a devastating domino effect but we're not ready for that

Nya: Tons of admirers. Chad was somewhat into her until discovering she was Kai's sister. Even Olivia had a crush on her at one point (saltwatershipping, woo!) Random people love Nya! She's smart, cool, pretty, has a probably illegal motorcycle! People can't help but be attracted to her (like brother, like sister, evidently)! However, she made it very clear that dating wasn't anything she was even remotely interested in. ...until Jay happened.

Olivia: If she actually was spending most of her time at school and not being an army general, she might've been a heartbreaker. But despite her confident, flirty, and otherwise commandeering personality, she's bait on a hook that not a lot of school fish are willing to bite. Probably because the bait is a shark

Jesse: He's got a lot of admirers now thanks to his Talent Show performance, but beforehand the guy could hardly make friends, let alone really attract anybody. And don't even get him started on the fact that people will mistake his birthday for Valentine's Day (when it's actually the day before) and he winds up unable to really celebrate either one properly ;w;

Antonia: Even if she did have an admirer or two here or there, she'd turn them all down, because like Nya she's not all that interested in dating...but unlike Nya, she also doesn't plan on changing her mind either. She's off the menu~