#skip to the fourth shinobi war and suddenly you have kaguya

[sasukebabygirl]

[anerdinallherglory]

Approaching Sun (11)

Author's Note: Hey guys! Sorry for such a longgggg wait. Between last chapter and this one, I had a crazy professor who assigned me a 70 page Unit Plan assignment. It was literally the HARDEST thing I have ever done. In short, I am thankful for your patience. I will get this story done eventually, I promise. However, starting on January 4th, I will be fulfilling my final internship, so I’m looking at another 4 months of busy. Don’t give up on me, though! SasuSaku will always consume my free time.

So here is your long-awaited chapter! As always, let me know what you think. And look out for the next chapter—boy am I excited to write it!

P.S. Reviews and shares always encourage a writer to write more!

Pairing: SasuSaku

Summary: After 2 years, Sasuke returns to the village where friends anxiously await him. Still troubled by the mysteries of Kaguya and his personal guilt, Sasuke is split between friends and his journey. One specific pink-haired individual has perhaps waited for him with far more dedication than anyone else. Troubled by rising casualties and international dependence on her abilities, Sakura is torn between her love for Sasuke and her duty to her village.

Chapters 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

Chapter 11: Doing What is Best

 Sakura looked down at her feet guiltily when she heard Kakashi's voice from the door. Sasuke had already been hard enough to face, and now here was the man who was to Sakura both sensei and Hokage--not to mention whom Sakura had cussed vividly at and blamed for her own mistakes last night--coming to see her.

"What do you want?" she heard Sasuke spit out rudely as he stood anchored in the doorway, arms crossed and looking as smug as Sakura had ever seen him.

"To see Sakura, of course!" another familiar voice called out cheerfully, and Sakura's eyes grew wide when she recognized Shizune's smiling speech. Pushing past the pissed-off Uchiha, Shizune squeezed between him and the crack in the door rather forcefully. Sometimes, Sakura could see characteristics of Lady Tsunade in the young woman who was also the Sanin’s pupil.

As Kakashi made his entrance, Sakura caught the annoyed look Sasuke was giving The Hokage. Kakashi awkwardly rubbed the back of his head before whispering, "She refused to be left behind."

Shizune embraced Sakura immediately.

"Sakura," Shizune said, holding Sakura at arm's length to look her up and down, "I am glad to see you are okay. You certainly had us all worried!"

Sakura tried to look apologetic, but tears sprang forward to her eyes. Shizune looked back at Kakashi worriedly, and in response, the Hokage made his way to them.

Sakura wiped at her eyes and strengthened her resolve and looked up at Kakashi. It was time she owned up to her behavior the night before. "Lord Hokage," she began, placing her hands together and bowing before him.

"None of that," Kakashi stuttered awkwardly, ducking to lift Sakura's chin up so she could meet his eyes. "I will always be Sensei to you."

"Kakashi Sensei, I am extremely sorry for my conduct last night," she continued when he released her chin. "Please forgive me." She faintly recalled throwing glass bottles towards him and inwardly groaned. He was certain to be disappointed in her. Sakura had proven that she had a breaking point, a weakness. Ninja who showed weakness would not survive in this shinobi world.

"We all have bad days," Kakashi began, standing beside her and placing a palm fixedly on her disheveled head. "Just ask Shizune," he added, gesturing in the surprised woman’s direction, "She's had her share of drunken episodes too. Tsunade is my witness."

"Kakashi!" Shizune cried out, raising her hands to cover her red face. Sakura smiled and Kakashi grinned back at her under his mask.

"Yes, well," Shizune interjected, grabbing hold of Sakura's arm and taking her hand. "You can say that none of us are perfect. Sometimes we make unwise decisions which lead to more unwise decisions, and so on. What's important is that you are okay and that you know that none of this is your fault."

Sakura nodded her head but didn’t reply. She looked down at her feet again. Of all people, she should know what to expect being in the medical core. She had witnessed so many deaths during the Fourth Shinobi World War and here she was making a huge fuss over one child she barely knew. However, this was a suicide that Sakura believed she could have prevented if she had only done her job.

Sakura looked over at Sasuke, who was now leaning against the wall, arms crossed and eyes closed. He had the same scowling look on his face that he always wore, eyebrows angling down to make a sharp "V" and his mouth a hard, pursed line. Perhaps, if Sakura had just forgotten about him--hadn't made such a big fuss about his return, she could have done her job. Maybe this was why she was feeling so guilty.

Sasuke spoke suddenly, his voice a grumble from across the room. "Why are you here?"

All eyes turned to the forgotten ninja, a small silence falling upon them.

"Ah," Kakashi spoke up, walking over to his moody student and placing a hand on his left shoulder. Sasuke glared at him. "Apologies for just showing up unannounced. We didn’t interrupt anything did we?"

Sasuke's eyes grew wide at the comment and Sakura waved her hands frantically.

"No, nothing!" she said quickly, which seemed to make the Hokage's smile grow wider. This made Sakura's face turn almost the exact same shade as her hair color. Sakura caught Sasuke's eye and they both looked away hurriedly.

"To answer your question Sasuke," Kakashi said, codeswitching back to his Hokage speech and taking on his authoritative personality. "We came for the both of you. We have some new residents in the village who need your medical attention, Sakura. Think you can help us out?"

Sakura looked over at her sensei who was looking at her expectantly. Shizune offered Sakura a smile of her own and Sakura nodded. It was time she got back to doing what she did best. Sakura caught Sasuke's gaze and she looked away. It was time she put her patients first in all matters, even matters concerning her heart.

. . . . . .

Sasuke had groaned inwardly when Kakashi proposed that they all go to the barracks to provide medical attention to the ninja Sasuke had rescued from the Coliseum. Sasuke had thought he had dodged this very situation the other day, and when he acted as if he were about to leave their group, Kakashi had spoken up, saying, "Why don't you come with us Sasuke? I'm sure we can find something for you to do. After all, you're the reason they are here."

Sasuke had grumbled under his breath, resentful for how many times Kakashi was going to remind him of that fact. This is what he got for helping people: work, responsibility, and more work. Sasuke had gotten used to cleaning up a mess, wiping his hands spotless from it, and avoiding all aftereffects. That was one thing that Sasuke really liked about not being in the village.

"You are?" Sakura had asked, turning to face him.

Sasuke's stomach had pitched as a former concern entered in his mind at her question. This is exactly what he had been trying to avoid yesterday. He didn't want to be there when Sakura was healing the injuries he was directly responsible for. Ever since the Uchiha had entered this village, everything was going exactly how he didn't want it to. Literally everything, and this was another example.

Sasuke hadn't replied and instead Kakashi had spoken up on his behalf, not mentioning this most important detail. He skipped the part where Sasuke had directly attacked these ninja, instead just telling Sakura that he had rescued them. Sakura had looked down at her feet and smiled which made Sasuke feel even more guilty. It was lie, but he couldn't tell her the truth, just when she was starting to think well of him.

At first, Sasuke had thought that the four of them would be working together, but five minutes into their walk, Shizune had departed for the hospital, and Kakashi had merely dropped them off at the door, saying, "I forgot that I had a meeting today. I'm late, so if you will excuse me."

Sasuke had glowered at him as he placed a reassuring hand on each of their arms, saying "I believe in you two," before walking away--rather unhurriedly for someone who was late to a meeting.

Now, Sasuke stood completely useless against a wall, offering no assistance as Sakura kindly tended to the people she was healing. She had seen almost every patient while Sasuke sat back and watched her. It was something that Sasuke had never seen her do before. She wasn’t wearing her lab coat, but Sakura possessed a focused demeanor as she conducted check-ups on all the ninja. It was strange to witness her apply knowledge that Sasuke hadn't been there to witness her gain. She had always been smart, smarter than him in almost all areas of knowledge at the academy. But the woman before him wasn’t raising her finger to tell her teammates how much she knew, or chastising Naruto for how little he knew. The woman before him, currently stooped over a middle-aged man's back and using her chakra to draw out infection through a deep cut along his shoulder, was the Sakura he had missed out on.  This was who Sakura was now, and Sasuke couldn't help but admire her.

A tug on his shirt tore the Uchiha's gaze away from his pink-haired teammate and onto a small child who was looking up at him.

"You Uchiha?" a little girl asked, crossing her arms in a challenge. Sasuke frowned down at her in reply.

"Hatsuko," the man Sakura was healing hissed back at the girl, "Go back to your mother. Leave this man alone."

Hatsuko ignored her father, and matched Sasuke's glare with one of her own. "Hurt my papa again, and you'll have to fight me!" she yelled, punctuating her statement with a raised fist and a stuck-out tongue.

Sasuke hurriedly snuck a glance at Sakura and flinched when her gaze landed on him, whom obviously had not missed the exchange. He glared back at the child, not saying a word.

"Hatsuko!" her father roared, standing up hurriedly to walk in the child's direction. The little fiery juvenile sprinted off in another direction. "This man saved me!" he called after her, just as she slammed the door down the hall from them, "GET BACK HERE AND APOLOGIZE!"

Wincing, the man grabbed his shoulder and Sakura rushed over to lead him back to his chair. "Forgive me," he bowed towards Sasuke. "My daughter is young and doesn't understand what you did for us."

"I'm the one who should be apologizing," the Uchiha said softly, feeling guilty and properly chastised by a little girl. For the first time, he walked over to the man and stood solemnly before him. "Perhaps if I had thought more clearly, I could have found another way to--"

"Don't blame yourself, young man" the ninja interrupted, flinching suddenly as Sakura tightly secured the final knot of his stitches. Clearing his throat, he continued, "There was no other way. What you did for us is something to be proud of. We would all be stuck fighting for our lives in that hellish place if it weren’t for you. We are all extremely grateful."

Sasuke glanced over to Sakura. Now that the cut was now clean and freshly stitched, Sakura covered the wound with gauze and wrapped it securely with bandage wrap.

"You're all done," she stated, "I'll be back in ten days to remove the stitches. Make sure to keep the wound clean. Be gentle and apply fresh bandages every night, except for tonight."

"Yes ma'am," he said, standing and bowing graciously to Sasuke's teammate. "I am grateful to you both. Konoha has some very fine ninja. It is thanks to you that I don’t have to worry about being separated from my family or sold to another shinobi. You have brought me the peace of freedom, Uchiha Sasuke."

As the man took his leave, he apologized once again for his daughter's behavior.

After he was out of sight, he turned to Sakura who was now cleaning up the stitching kit that was laid out across the counter. She pushed it carefully in a big yellow bag that she had brought along with her. Sakura picked it up and Sasuke closed his eyes when she walked past him out the door. She stopped to wait for him in the hall and he followed her until they were past all the people who stopped them and thanked them.

Once out the door and into the darkness, Sasuke caught up with Sakura and took the bag out of her hand. It was the only polite thing he believed had ever done for anyone probably ever in his life.

"Thank you," she said surprised. A small smile touched her lips but Sasuke was absorbed in silence.

Once they were alone together, walking the dark passageways to her apartment, Sasuke couldn’t remain silent anymore and spat out, "I know what you're thinking."

Sakura peeked over at him as they walked, a look of confusion on her face. Almost like she wasn’t expecting any kind of explanation from him about anything. "You do?"

"You must think I haven't changed at all," he said, looking away from her.

She reached out and gently took his elbow, stopping them and turning him towards her slightly. He pulled back from her but didn’t look away.

"That's not what I think," Sakura whispered to him. "I think you are a hero for saving all of those people."

"But I hurt them, " he said firmly, "I'm still hurting innocent people." She was looking at him softly in response and Sasuke didn’t know why, but he was suddenly angry at her for it. Was she still trying to justify his actions in her mind? Why was it so hard for her to hate him?

"You are being too hard on yourself," she offered kindly, touching his elbow again reassuringly. "You've changed. What you did was for the best."

She began walking again, but Sasuke dropped the yellow bag at his feet and quickly grabbed her sleeve, keeping her from moving. "I can't let you walk away thinking good of me. I was angry when I fought them. Angry with Oyashiro En and all the other ninja who had put them there. I had taken them down in the quickest way that I knew how. I fought children--"

"Sasuke," she said seriously, picking her bag off the ground and slipping the handle in the crook of her arm. "Before I ever was a medical ninja, I was your teammate. By healing them, I could recognize you in their injuries from the very beginning, but I was surprised not because I learned that you had done this, but surprised because of how careful you were with them when I know how hard that must have been while facing them all."

Sasuke scowled at her. "That's not an excuse."

Sakura looked up at the sky as a faint light suddenly fell on them, and Sasuke followed her gaze. The moon was peeking out between two dark silvery clouds. He looked back down at her, staring at her as she watched the moon. Her face and hair lit up for a moment and she offered him a small smile in reply. "I'm not someone to offer advice, but sometimes you have to hurt people in order to do what's best for them. It's a part of being a shinobi. I'm sure Itachi would agree. I think he would be proud of you, Sasuke."

Sasuke's eyes grew wide at the mention of his brother's name. Did she mean him? Itachi had sacrificed everything, even his own happiness, in order to protect the village. He had killed their family and abandoned Sasuke. Is this what she meant?

Her voice interrupted his thoughts as she said, "Let's forget the past. Let's learn from our mistakes and grow from them. I'm going to work towards becoming a stronger medic ninja for the village and you can work towards being the best shinobi that you can be. Can we do that together?"

Sasuke held her gaze, scowl remaining fixed on his face. The best shinobi that he could ever be, huh? Sasuke didn’t know if that was a possibility, but he would try. He would do what was best for the village and the people he cared deeply about. Sasuke didn’t answer her but when Sakura tugged on his sleeve, he followed her.

. . . . . . . .

They spent the rest of the walk in silence. Sakura didn’t release Sasuke's sleeve and he didn’t pull away. It was a fragile moment, a moment that Sakura was afraid would break if she spoke or breathed too hard. Sasuke's right hand swung at his side, sleeve caught barely in her fingers. Sakura wanted desperately to grab his fingers but she knew that would be crossing the line of whatever they had between them.

Whenever they reached the door, Sakura released Sasuke's sleeve and walked in first, setting down her bag. "I'll make you some tea, if you'd like. Or if you're too tired--"

"Sakura," came Sasuke’s emotionless voice from outside the door. Sakura turned and realized that he didn’t follow her in and her stomach lurched suddenly. Sakura walked back outside and looked up at him, worry settling heavily in her heart.

"What's wrong?" she asked, trying to reach for his sleeve again. He pulled back this time and instead slowly placed his hand in his cloak and revealed something small. Sasuke held it out to her without looking at her, and Sakura took what she recognized to be the key she had given him. Was he really giving it back to her? Did this mean he really leaving?

"We both know I can’t stay here," Sasuke said, looking away from her. “My answer is no.”

Sakura stared down at the key in her hand, and realized for the first time that Sasuke was saying goodbye. Sasuke wasn’t just saying no to coming in. He was distancing himself. He was telling her no. Tears sprung to her eyes as she looked down at the ridiculous key.

"No to what, Sasuke?" she whispered, as he made to turn away from her. Without a care, she walked in front of him, placing a palm on his chest. "No to what?"

"No to everything," he said, finally meeting her eyes, confirming her thoughts.

"I thought that we were growing closer; I thought that we could try--" Sakura said desperately, trying to understand why he would do this. Why couldn't he just let her into his heart? After everything they had been through together, why did he not care for her in the same way that she cared for him?"

"The most we will ever be is friends, Sakura, and that's all," he replied, and Sakura searched his features for any signs that would betray his words but his face remained perfectly stoic and firm. His dark onyx eyes did not waver.

"I've already told you. I can't be the man you want me to be. I have a mission, a duty to protect this village, and so do you. You said it earlier; we can work towards our goals and become better shinobi for our village," Sasuke said plainly, and Sakura felt shocked at how he was using her own words against her. 

Tears began to roll down Sakura's cheeks and she wiped furiously at them, begging herself to stop. Be strong, she whispered to her pounding heart. It was a useless plea.

"I love you, Sasuke. I will wait for you. I know that we can make this work if--"

His right hand caught her arm and he pulled her towards him and Sakura froze. Gently, he held her before him, looking down at her and replying, "I want you to stop waiting. I want you to move on with your life. Find someone who can give you the happiness you deserve. That person is never going to be me."

Sasuke released her after a minute, and he turned away from her, showing her his back like he always did. The distance between them grew as he walked away.

Sakura wanted to call out to him. She wanted Sasuke to know that she couldn’t stop waiting for him. That there would never be anyone else. But instead, all she managed was to plead through her tears, "Please don’t say goodbye. Please don’t leave me alone again. You are breaking my heart!"

And then he was in front of her again, so quickly that Sakura had missed it when she blinked. She flinched when Sasuke reached out and placed two heavy fingertips against her forehead. After a second, his fingers moved to support her chin.

"Sometimes you have to hurt people in order to do what's best for them," he whispered in that deep monotone voiced that only belonged to him. When Sakura opened her eyes, he had disappeared into the surrounding darkness.