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#smiling through it all!!!! i cant believe this is my life!!!
penaltyboxboxbox · 11 months
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when i finish one job and immediately have to start the next job and im still behind on work and 2 projects and the new job all have to be finished in 3 days and i have to attend a gallery opening tonight instead of working and i need things to arrive in the mail before i can even finish the working and i cant send things to the printer until the things arrive in the mail and and and
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leosgreyfringe · 7 months
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leo and martin's faces right after letting that pass roll between them only for declan to then score the sixth against west ham are so fucking funny
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antibayern · 1 year
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pinkeoni · 2 years
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Woke up early and remembered yesterday and all the emotions came flooding back. Went back to sleep and woke up and remembered again
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autisticlee · 4 months
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I know it's wrong and bad to say this, but sometimes I really hate when my friends have other friends. (specifically when I can't also be friends with those friends) because every time I want someone to hang out with or talk to, the only couple friends I have are always busy with their other friends. when I want to plan something with them, they will always choose the other friends over me. they will cancel plans *with* me as soon as other friends ask, but won't cancel plans *for* me when i ask. they will use up their social spoons on other friends and leave none for me. always putting things with me off or simply not responding at all.
i'm always told by random people when I say I want mkre friends "it's better to have a couple great friends than many aquantances" or something like that. but honestly it sucks because you can't rely on 1-2 people to always be there for you every day or every week when you want or need someone. if you keep asking, you're seen as annoying and clingy and they will ignore you eventually (or worse)
it's annoying that they get to fill their social needs at all times, but I never get to. because i'm never the one that gets to go first in the social queue. and when it gets to my turn, it refreshes and i'm pushed to the back again.
the only solution I can ever think of is being friends with my friends' friends too....but for some reason!!!!!! that never works out!!!! (if my friends will even share their friends with me to begin with)
#and dont even get me started on when i share my friends with each other and they choose each other over me and kick me out lmao#WHY ARE FRIENDS SO HARD#why am i just a little creature that requires certain amounts/types of social interaction that never gets met#and no one wants to do anything about it. and im forced to sit here feeling bad about it because i cant fix it either fbbdbdfghhdhjrhfdj#this whole friend and human interaction and bonding and companionship bullshit is going to be lifelong issue and im not here for it#NO ADVICE IM GIVEN WORKS. IM TIRED OF ONE SIDED BULLSHIT WHERE ONLY I TRY. HUMANS ARE ANNOYING#im like a non human creature that wears human skin and everyone except me knows and they dont want me and i domt know why#i also dont have the energy to do the whole new friends song and dance where you small talk to get to know each other#and share your life stories. i rather just hang out and become friends through enjoyment of mutual enjoyed activity????#or something like that idk#i tried so hard to be friendly to friends' friend last weekend when we all hung out so i can be adopted into their friend group but#they didnt even tell me it was nice meeting me and hanging out and didnt even say bye to me. only to my friends#and i was too sad about that to say it to them instead as they walked away. theyre way more social and good at words#and i was overwhelmed and struggling to speak so i was waiting for the queue to say those things or something#i expected it like an idiot loser becuase i thought i did a good job being a cute gremlin that fits into the group that seems to have#other goofy gremlins like me. i thought maybe they can be “my people” or something. but then they turned around and left#after telling my friends bye. and didnt acknowledge me. and i juat kept smiling and turned around and walked away too#PRETENDING IT WAS FINE. BUT IT FELT BAD. BECAUSE I FAILED TO MAKE A FRIEND WHEN I THOUGHT I DID GOOD WITH THEM FOR ONCE#so “being confident/believing in yourself” like im told to do DIDNT WORK AND IT FELT WORSE THAN DOUBTING MYSELF. YOU LIARS. ugh fhdhdhfhjssk#WHAT DO. WHY LEE BAD AT THIS. WHY IT FEEL BAD. WHY NOT JUST ACCEPT BEING ALONE 99% OF TIME AND GIVE UP. WOULD BE EASIER#lee rants#autism things#i know its rude to invite yourself into a friend group but what if i try anyway 🤪✌️
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latinorry · 2 years
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So i just got accepted to grad school at NYU
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mourn2 · 2 years
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reunion being posted shortly after my death note hyperfixation finally fades makes me feel like ive just been thrown into Ls washing machine except instead of water and soap in the washing machine its death note thoughts circulating around my brain again. i feel like the prodigal son returning and i feel like the prodigal sons parents. i feel like sachiko yagami.
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itoshiexx · 4 months
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when you call them "husband" - part. 2
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how the blue lock boyfriends react when you call them "husband" - part 2
pairings: itoshi rin, michael kaiser, mikage reo x fem!reader (no descriptions tho, just the words "wife" on rin's part) (separate) | warnings: established relationship, fluff, lovesick boys
notes: I'M ALIVE! i cant believe how long it's been since i had time/energy/creativity to write something, ohmy goddddddd. i'm so sorry for all the time it took to post this, but i wanna ty all so much for all the love on part 1 and all the requests for part 2! hopefully this will meet your expectations ♥ as always, i went a lil' overboard with rin's part. enjoy!
part 1 / masterlist
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Itoshi Rin
rin was not a fan of social media. it was clear with the way his instagram only had 8 pictures despite being years since his career started, and even more so by the fact he had no other social media besides that. if he wasn’t so famous, people would say itoshi rin was a ghost or some artificial intelligence invention. 
it was one of the reasons people were very shocked when he started dating you, an influencer with millions of followers on every platform. rin was a private person, and you… well, you shared your life on the internet for everyone to see. to say you were polar opposites was an understatement.
however, you never forced your boyfriend to appear in any of your socials, only recording things for your own fun and memories and posting only what he allowed. rin was glad for that. he didn’t mind doing dumb things with you to see you smile, as long as the rest of the world couldn’t see how whipped he was for you.
also, you were kind of glad the professional athlete was so unaware of social media, because it meant you could do a lot of tiktok trends without the risk of him already knowing what was coming — which made everything more satisfying. 
and the trend you chose that day was especially good.
“hey everyone, it’s y/n here!” you chirped, waving your hands in front of your phone. however, you were actually recording rin, who was at the other side waiting for your sign to appear on the screen.
you continued speaking. “today i have a very special guest, who i’m sure you’re all very familiar with.” you gave the camera a little cheeky wink, and your boyfriend rolled his eyes with all your theatrics. “please welcome itoshi rin, my handsome husband!”
rin gave a step forward to start his way to you, but suddenly, his whole body froze, brows furrowing in what you could only call utmost confusion. silence took over the room for what felt like an eternity, and you had to suppress your laugh seeing the imaginary ‘loading’ wheel on his head.
rin.exe stopped working.
“baby?” you decided to intervene, honestly a little scared of how immobile rin was.
“you— i’m— did you just— did we—”
you could no longer hold your laughter, and rin’s favorite melody echoing through the walls of your shared apartment was probably what snapped him out of his trance. he immediately scowled and crossed his arms, cheeks burning red from his pathetic stutter.
“i am never doing these dumb videos with you again.”
“no, no, i’m sorry!” your giggles kept going, and you approached your pouty boyfriend, squishing his cheeks between your hands. the smooch you gave him was almost enough to make him melt. almost. rin still had some self respect.
he also didn’t want to admit how abnormally fast his stone heart was beating with the mere thought of being referred to as your husband — and, even better, referring to you as his wife. 
fuck. that certainly did make him feel lots of things. those stupid butterflies that were born the minute you met were roaming freely in his stomach, soaring with all the love he had harbored just for you. 
“i’m sorry, baby,” you said again, smiling like you swallowed the sun and all things good in this world. you might as well have. how else could rin explain the way you were his everything? “it was a prank i saw on tiktok.”
he arched his eyebrow, arms uncrossing to put his hands on your waist. “oh? so you don’t want me to be your husband?”
the itoshi was satisfied to see you flushing this time. “i— w-well, you see…”
and then you started rambling, just like you did every time something made you nervous. and rin could only look at you as if nothing else was worth looking at, because really, to him, it wasn’t. 
…well, maybe the sight of you walking down the aisle would get the cake. he might have to find out soon. 
Michael Kaiser
once you started dating bastard munchen’s star, michael kaiser, it was natural to have his world collide with yours. everything from football to blue hair dye to weird sleeping habits became a part of you as well, and you nourished every expanse of your world his presence alone was able to give.
your favorite part, besides learning all of him — his little habits, quirks and love languages that seemed to be crafted solely for you — was definitely immersing yourself in his culture. germany always seemed distant and quite detached from your life, and you loved to learn new things from different perspectives. 
food, traditions, language… michael loved teaching you things, giddy and secretly grateful for your excitement. it was his sparkly eyes that prompted you to learn a few things by yourself to surprise him and make him happy. 
the tiktok trend was just a nice coincidence. 
you phone was hidden on the kitchen balcony, camera recording and waiting for the moment your boyfriend would arrive in your shared apartment. luckily, kaiser was very punctual, and you didn’t have to wait much longer.
“liebling, i’m home!” you heard him scream from the front door, and you giggled to yourself, pretending to be busy chopping vegetables for dinner. 
you waited for his footsteps to near where you were, and, as soon as you felt he entered the camera frame, you answered:
“welcome home, ehemann!”
you didn’t have to turn around to see the way kaiser completely froze; arms stopping just before reaching your waist as if your figure was an illusion created by his tired mind. you fought hard to suppress your grin.
“what… did you say…?” his voice was low and uncertain, but there was no annoyance in it; just pure confusion. 
turning your head around to finally look at him, you were pleased to find your mikka with rosy cheeks and a bashful expression, so extremely unusual for a guy like him you couldn’t help but feel your heart flutter on your chest. 
you gave him your best innocent look. “huh? isn’t that how you say boyfriend?”
“i-it’s husband, liebe. you called me husband,” his tone was still incredulous, and this time, you couldn’t keep your smile off your face. 
“oh, did i?”
your countenance seemed to finally snap him out of his trance, and michael’s eyebrows shot up, scoffing slightly — albeit still endearingly. his arms circled your waist and he pressed a kiss on the side of your neck. 
“how mean of you, baby. playing with my heart like that.” he trailed more kisses on your neck and jaw, making you squirm. “you tryin’ to kill me or something?”
you giggled again, both from the ticklish kisses he was giving you and the huge amount of love you had harbored just for him. “of course not, baby. i need you alive to make you my husband,” you jested.
“oh, yeah? you wanna make me your husband?”
“yes.” you shifted, giving him a sweet kiss on the cheek. kaiser hugged you a little tighter, feeling something fuzzy inside his chest. “is that a problem?”
“never,” he answered immediately. because it was true.
boyfriend, fiancé, partner, husband… michael didn’t mind what title would be bestowed to him — as long as he could keep being yours.
Mikage Reo
being the heir of one of the biggest corporations of the country and a professional football player made your boyfriend’s schedule pretty busy. therefore, thursdays like these, where you and him could have a nice walk around the park under the warm sunlight, hand in hand, were extremely rare — hence why they were so appreciated.
reo knew how much his frenetic agenda was a hard toll on your relationship, affecting both of you with distance, longing and short periods of time together. and, well, everyone knew how much of a goner he was for you, so it wasn’t surprising to see him give in whatever spare time he had in his hands — even going as far as making such time exist if there wasn’t any — to be with you for as long as he possibly could.
how could he deny your pretty little eyes pleading to have a stroll in the park with him ‘just for a few minutes?’
god, you were so selfless. he wanted to give you all of his minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and years. and for all that’s worth, reo would never deny you of such a thing — he’d rather shoot himself than make you think you weren’t loved with every fiber of his being.
the weather was nice; a gentle breeze kissing both of your faces and making everything more pleasant. you were both chatting and appreciating the calm environment when you spotted an old lady a few feet ahead, selling different colored roses for the passersby. a smile was etched onto your lips, and you impulsively let go of reo’s hand to run towards her. 
“why hello, dear. would you like to buy a rose?”
your boyfriend watched you beam to the lady and slowly approached you, though still keeping his distance and trying hard not to intervene and buy all the roses for you. 
“yes, please! a red one would be perfect.”
“oh, who will you give it to?” asked the woman, already taking one flower from the bunch to hand it to you. 
your smile became slightly more bashful, “it’s for my husband!”
and fuck, if reo wasn’t already completely in love with you and thoroughly believed you were his soulmate until then, he certainly would after that very moment. he could feel his cheeks burning and his tongue rolling inside his mouth with how speechless he became. his heart soared with your words, excitement coursing through his veins with a love so overwhelming he nearly fell on his knees right there. 
heavens, he loved you so fucking much. and you made him realize it was about time he proved it to you (once again).
his hands easily found his phone in his pocket, and a quick call to the jewelry store was made while you busied yourself with paying for the flower. reo couldn’t stop smiling like a lovesick fool, but he didn’t mind.
“hey, mr. fuji, it’s mikage! you know, i think it’s time for that visit i mentioned a while ago…”
he might not fall to his knees right there, but he would drop at one knee very soon.
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princessbrunette · 6 months
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rafe had been trying to pick a fight with bunny!reader all day due to his bad mood. however, due to her being a little ray of pink glittery sunshine — it just wasn’t happening.
first, the problem was the pink glittery dildo in your dresser that he found whilst snooping due to boredom, waiting for you to be done in the shower. he argues with himself whilst you sit at your vanity, giggling and happily doing your makeup.
“you tellin’ me you need that shit? ‘cus… ‘cus if that’s the case, don’t come begging for dick every thirty minutes when clearly you could be fixing your own problems.” he rants, huffing as you carefully brush mascara through your eyelashes.
“its not the same! pluuuus, i haven’t used that thing in ages. dont even know where you found it, daddy.” you’re clearly amused and it’s making things worse, locking eyes with your boyfriend through the mirror as he stands with his hands on his hips.
“think i’m stupid, right? if you weren’t still using this thing you would have thrown it in the trash.”
you spin on your stool, giving him a convincing pout. “i only use it when you go away on business trips with your dad, ‘cos i just miss you so much.”
he blinks, clearly not out of juice.
“you need to learn a little patience and self discipline, alright — you’ll appreciate this dick more without the fuckin’ silicone version.” he drawls and you giggle again at his word choice before bringing your manicured fingers to your lips to stop yourself.
“m’attached to it rafey. i like it. its pink and glittery and i’m not throwing it away.” you stand your ground, and his jaw ticks, looking around once more at the toy laying on your bed.
“cant do all the shit i do n’you know it… right? you call me when that toy fuckin’ chokes you out how you like it or spits in your damn asshole and shoves its thumb in there. yeah?” he mouths off before leaving the room, caring less and less about the argument as time goes on. now you really couldn’t fight him — he was playing dirty, and that made you horny.
his fighting spirit is given a new lease of life downstairs in the kitchen, when you accidentally blurt out the wrong name whilst speaking to him.
you’re giggling uncontrollably once more, grabbing at his shirt in the kitchen attempting to pull you closer as he holds his hands up, pretending to be totally disgusted.
“nah, who the fuck is that — huh? nate?”
“gosh, rafey — he’s from gossip girl! i was just thinkin’ about the show and your names sound similar! was an accident!” the fact you don’t sound sorry in the slightest is grinding his gears, not hugging you back when you manage to wrap your arms around him. “daddy hug me back.” you pout, and he peels you back with his hands on your shoulders.
“on thin fuckin’ ice today… alright?” he raises his eyebrows. you smile and nod, earrings jangling like there wasn’t a thought in your head.
it’s on the way to the country club that he’s really had enough, insisting on playing your music in the car, constantly winding down the volume to ask questions that didn’t need to be asked. your delicate hand reaches out for the volume toggle once more and he smacks it away.
“if you’re going to ask me if i’d still love you as a worm, or whatever bullshit you’ve conjured up — i suggest staying quiet, yeah? already told you that you’re pushing it today.”
he doesn’t have to look at you to know your smile is spreading.
“that wasn’t my question, but would you?”
the car pulls over to the side of the road with a swiftness, and he turns his body in his seat. you look unbothered as ever.
“why’d we stop?”
“you’re uh, you’re goin’ in the trunk. okay?” he rasps slowly, nodding his head like it would hypnotise you into agreeing. somehow, it worked — because your grin remains.
“okay!”
he marches over to your side and yanks you out before walking you round the back and opening the trunk. “i’m serious. get in.”
you do with no complaints — and by the time he is back in the drivers seat, he believes he’s taken it too far. however there’s no banging around, no crying, no screaming for him to let you out — so he drives away. the silence is rewarding, but he doesn’t feel great about it.
when he pulls up to the country club, he’s quick to walk around the backside of his truck and open up the trunk, relieved to see you happy as a clam — and lifts you out from under your arms. “that was fun! it was like you were a kidnapper, but also my boyfriend.” your eyes have a twinkle to them as he marches you towards his group of friends, gawking with questioning gazes.
“yeah you like that shit? ‘that turn you on?” he bites back sarcastically, but you nod anyway.
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yuitoru · 8 months
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𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐌 𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐓 - 𝐒.𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎
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🌀 — streamerbf! satoru gojo x fem! reader | 🌀 ft — fluff, angst(?) | 🌀 cw — swearing, satoru cant pull to save his life, mentions of death threats |
s.gojo streamer!au - the first time you make an (accidental) appearance on satoru's live stream
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"that guy is definitely cheating!!" satoru groaned in frustration as he ran his hands through his fluffy white hair, grimacing down at the now loading screen in front of him. the neon lights from his monitor shone onto his face, the brightness clearly way too high but he always refused to change it - as he squinted to read the influx of comments in the live comments of his stream, a certain few caught his eye.
fushtoji : 'this guy actually sucks.'
kamo_choso : 'dead game tbh'
a small scowl almost instantly formed on his face, his eyes narrowed as he stared dead at the screen. "firstly, i do not suck! that was one bad round!! and second, fortnite is not a dead game. its in its redemption arc and you know it," satoru huffed, his face resembling a pouty toddler. he spun in his chair to look over to where you where sprawled out on his bed, scrolling through your phone. "can you believe this?? my own viewers are bullying me!!"
meg_gumi : 'oh great hes talking to himself.'
yuujiii : 'is someone there?'
"i am not talking to myself! fucking hell, whats with everyone taking the piss out of me today..." satoru said with a sigh, looking over at you with a pout. "babyyyy, make them stop..!!" he whined, dramatically hanging his head in his hands. you laughed softly, sending him a small smile before going back to your phone - however, your laugh had been just audible enough for it to be picked up by satoru’s mic, resulting in a rapid increase in his live chat comments.
user19899 : ‘wait is someone acc there??’
phantom08 : ‘it sounded like a girl..’
fushtoji : ‘dont tell me this guy actually has a gf.’
satoru glared at his camera before groaning and rolling his eyes, a whiny tone in his voice as he huffed. "why is it so hard for you all to believe that i have a girlfriend??! honestly im hurt..."
ryokuna : 'negative rizz.'
"i dont see why youre talking after your girlfriend just broke up with you, sukuna!" satoru mocked, sticking his tongue out before spinning back around on his chair to face you again. he opened his arms for you to come cuddle him, as one of his hands reached towards his keyboard to disable the camera. you slid off of his bed and walked towards him, before sitting down on his lap and cuddling into his chest. satoru pressed an attack of kisses against the top of your head, his hands roaming up and down your back. what the two of you were unaware of was the fact that satoru hadnt turned off his camera, instead only muting the stream, meaning that both your face and the way you were curled up in his arms were visible to the entire stream - over 20k people, at least.
fushtoji : 'oh shit he does actually have a gf.'
gojoswhore : 'WHAT NO WAY'
meg_gumi : 'this guy out of everyone???'
the two of you stayed how you were, completely oblivious to the fact that your relationship had just been exposed to his whole fanbase, and that the news would practically spread like wildfire. after a few minutes, you shuffled a bit in satoru's arms, trying to get comfortable, but his monitor caught the corner of your eye, causing your face to drop in shock. satoru followed your gaze, eventually locking with his own eyes from his screen, as he realised what had just happened. he scrambled forwards to cover your face and turn off his camera, letting out a groan as he looked at you.
"shit, baby, 'm so sorry.. i honestly didnt realise," he sighed, rubbing his face with his hands. he knew that you would eventually be shown on camera to meet his fans, but not this soon, and not like this. you two had just been shown in a private moment - something that satoru didnt want his audience to see. he looked up at you with an apologetic expression, before gently pressing a kiss to your forehead.
the chats had already started rolling in, with thousands of people commenting on your relationship, your appearance... it felt awful, like the entire world was now watching every single one of your movements and all having their own things to say about it. you couldnt have been on camera for more than a minute or two, but the chat was flooded with people's thoughts.
user38384 : 'shes pretty, but nothing special tbh'
kikio001 : 'kinda expected more from gojo'
miko3 : 'i think shes rly pretty, whats w the hate???'
mods had already started stepping in and removing the rude commenters, but the damage had already been done. people had seen your face for the first time, and were assuming all sorts of things about you. satoru noticed your downcast expression, and leaned forward to reach his keyboard, before unmuting himself, not bothering to turn the camera back on.
"if you are already commenting shit about my girlfriend, who you dont even know, and wont get to know the way i do, then youre honestly just a pathetic excuse for a human. show some more damn respect, its not hard to be a good person," and he ended the stream right there. wiping away any stray tears that had collected in your eyes, satoru smiled down at you before lifting you into his arms and standing from his chair, before carrying you back towards his bed and setting you down. he quickly slipped under the duvet with you, bringing your body into his chest as he sighed softly. "dont worry, baby.. ill sort this all out, okay? you dont have to ever come back onto the stream if you dont want to. i love you, pretty."
his gentle words, as well as his soft embrace, slowly lured you into your exhaustion - you were on the brink of sleep when you felt satoru press a feather-light kiss to your head, and that was the last thing you remembered before you fell asleep, completely safe and protected from all the harsh comments in satoru's arms, and that was the way that it would always be.
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© yuitoru™ — dont copy, plagiarise, repost, modify and/or translate my works
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ghostlyferrettarot · 2 months
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♥︎Pick a picture: 🍭🍩Random messages from your Person🍩🍭
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•Pile 1 •Pile 2 •Pile 3
❗️This is a collective reading, take what resonates and leave the rest❗️
✨️Paid Services ✨️ (Natal charts and tarot readings) Open!
🧁If you like my work you can support me through Ko-fi. Thank you!🧁
🍩Masterlist🍩
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💛Pile 1:
🍫" Its time to get loose!"
🍫" Do you like me as much as i like you?"
🍫" Who am i kidding? they know the way i look at you"
🍫"Work smart, not hard, my love"
🍫" Im on me knees when you look at me"
🍫" Sometimes i feel unreal when you are around me"
🍫" Some say im possed, but only for you ;)"
♥︎Hi pile 1! your person its so fun, i cant with them :"D. This pile is giving me a lot of Anthony and Kate from Bridgerton type of dinamic; this person will literally worship the ground you walk on, and i love that for you. Honestly i had so much fun channeling these, i love your energy pile 1!
🍫Song:
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💛Pile 2:
🧁" Your smile it's melting my heart"
🧁"I truly hope you are celebrating yourself right now, you deserve it"
🧁"Is it hot in here or its just me?"
🧁"Sometimes i cant believe im so lucky to share my days with you"
🧁"Please take good care of yourself while im not there"
🧁"I'm happy if you are happy"
🧁"Even if everything sucks, i know for sure you will shine regarless"
🧁"You and me, me and you, just us"
♥︎Hi pile 2! your person its so sweet and caring. This is your rock, they love you unconditianally and its so pure to channel. The color white is being really prominent, so this one may be significant, aswell as bears and white cats. I feel like you two communicate a lot through your higher self, telepatic connection vibe.
🧁Song:
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💛Pile 3:
🍦" Love you to the moon and to Saturn"
🍦"STOP STRESSING! IT WILL BE OKAY!"
🍦"You are so much more capable than what you think, you know that right?"
🍦"Sometimes we just need a little fun and a good nap, my love"
🍦"Dont you just love our midnight adventures"
🍦"Thanks for being my travel and life buddy"
🍦"Dont worry, ill take care of it ;)"
🍦"Only you truly know me"
♥︎Hi pile 3! your person its your biggest fan honestly; start trusting in yourself and your abilities more, you have all the tools you need in yourself; just start beliving more in yourself. This person loves yiu and wants to see you shine, you are the star!
🍦Song:
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🍦🍩Thanks for reading and tell me if it resonated🍩🍦
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cherry-romper · 4 months
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Loving You Sounds Like a Song
Playlist
+ Midoriya, Bakugou, Todoroki, Kirishima, Kaminari, Sero, Iida, Momo, Jirou, Mina, Ochaco, Asui, Mirio, Amajiki, Aizawa, Hawks, All Might, Dabi, Twice, Compress, Shiguraki
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Midoriya; Head over Heels - Tears For Fears
I wanted to be with you alone
I'm lost in admiration, could I need you this much?
Something happens and I'm head over heels
One little boy, one little man - funny how time flies
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Bakugou; Everlong - Foo Fighters
I've waited here for you, Everlong
Come down, And waste away with me
Breathe out, So I can breathe you in
And I wonder...if everything could ever feel this real forever.
You gotta promise not to stop when I say when.
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Todoroki; Say Yes to Heaven - Lana Del Rey
Give peace a chance, Let the fear you have fall away
Say yes to heaven, Say yes to me
If you go, I'll stay, You come back, I'll be right here
And if you fight, I'll fight
I've got my mind on you
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Kirishima; Lover - Taylor Swift
Can I go where you go?
Can we always be this close forever and ever?
I've loved you three summers now, honey, but I want 'em all
I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover
All's well that ends well to end up with you
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Kaminari; NEON - DPR LIVE
Your kisses make it go neon
Neon, I want to know you
Neon, lose the night with you
Girl, I'm liking your body, but more than that I love your, uh
Colourful smile, you make me wonder what's under, uh
The way you make the light go blurry
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Sero; Coast - Hailee Steinfeld
You the wave upon my ocean, pounding rhythm and motion
Just relax and let the riptide pull you close
Baby, all I wanna do is coast, with you
The starts come down, you drown 'em out
I'm sinking deeper into you
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Iida; This Charming Man - The Smiths
Will nature make a man of me?
Why pamper life's complexity, When the leather runs smooth on the passenger seat?
This man said, "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"
A jumped up pantry boy, Who never knew his place
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Momo; You've Got The Love - Florence + The Machine
I know I can count on you
But you've got the love I need to see me through
When my food is gone you are my daily meal
When friends are gone I know my saviour's love is real
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Jirou; Wait a Minute! - WILLOW
I'm here right now, with you
I'll run my hands through you hair
You wanna run your fingers through mine
You left your diary at my house, And I read those pages, Do you really love me, baby?
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Mina; DESERT EAGAL - Beyonce
Soft to the touch, let you hold somethin'
Soft kisses on some fat lips
Put on a show and make it nasty, Desert Eagle in the backseat
Oh, I keep it classy, let you love me like a lady, yeah
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Ochaco; Strawberry Skies - Kid Travis
Girl you brighten up my world
Cant you tell I want you by my side?
We're gone with the wind, Hair in your face, Put my hand on your waist
Strawberry skies, all on your lips, 'cause I love how it taste
Hope that you catch me when I fall
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Asui; Honey - Kehlani
I like my girls just like I like my honey, sweet, A little selfish
'Cause I'm a beautiful wreck, A colourful mess, but I'm funny
All the pretty girls in the world, But I'm in this space with you
Don't walk away, or would you wait for me?
Isn't love all we need? Is it love?
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Mirio; I can't Help Myself - Four Tops
You know that I love you, I cant help myself
I love you and nobody else
Leaving just your picture behind, And I kissed it a thousand times
When you snap your figure or wink your eye, I come running too you
But every time I see your face, I get choked up inside.
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Amajiki; Halley's Comet - Billie Eilish
But in my dreams I seem to be more honest, And I must admit, you've been in quite a few
But you're all it takes for me to break a promise
Silly me to fall in love with you
Midnight for me is 3AM for you
I was good at feeling nothing, now I'm hopeless
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Aizawa; Adore You - Harry Styles
I get so lost inside your eyes, Would you believe it?
You don't have to say you love me
You don't have to say nothing
You don't have to say you're mine
I'd walk through fire for you, Just let me adore you
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Hawks; Where u Goin' Tonight? - Mac Ayres
Just don't stand so close to me... Unless tonight, you'll be my only
All of the things I tried to keep low, Feeling like I been changing
Tell me where you goin' tonight? I'll meet you there if that's alright
Could I be the one to do the things that you like?
Burnt all my bridges, baby, But at least I'm staying warm
I been working on forgiveness, Said I don't think its catching on
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All Might; I Was Made For Lovin' You - KISS
Tonight I wanna give it all to you
'Cause girl, I was made for you, And girl, you were made for me
Can you get enough of me?
Feel the magic, there's something that drives me wild
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Dabi; LET THE WORLD BURN - Chris Grey
It's dangerous 'cause I want it all, And I don't think I care what it costs
I shouldn't have fallen in love, Look what it made me become
And I know you think you can run
But I just cant let you go
I'd let the world burn, Let the world burn for you
This is how it always had to end, If I cant have you then no one can
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Twice; Caraphernelia - Pierce The Veil
There ain't a think that you can do that's going to ruin my night
This dizzy dreamer and her bleeding little blue boy
Hold my heart, it's beating for you anyway
Ill burn your name into my throat
What's so good about picking up the pieces?
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Mr. Compress; Never Ever Getting Rid of me - From Waitress
I will never let you let me leave, I promise I'm not lying
I'm gonna do this right, Show you I'm not moving, Wherever you go, I won't be far to follow
I'm gonna love you so, You'll learn what I already know, I love you means you're never, ever, ever getting rid of me
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Shigaraki; No Mercy - DeathByRomy
My boy hates everybody but me
He's sinister, but to me, he's sweet
In love with a monster, Daddy thinks I've lost it
My boy's a bullet in your brain, I show no mercy
Your nightmare is the man of my dreams
It turns me on when he makes you bleed
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531 notes · View notes
bloodreinasbathwater · 4 months
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Nhl Recs
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Jack Hughes
Everybody wants you but I don’t like a gold rush by @sunkissed-zegras
A Shoulder To Cry On, Is A Dick To Ride On by @drysdalesv
-> this was one of the first fics i read that included Trevor zegras…and boy did he piss me off. We love when the best friend could be a better man/fuck AND I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF THIS if you disagree you can leave 🚪
Intro (end of the world) by @fiapartridge
Always his by @sc0tters
Breakable heaven by @chewingcyanide
-> had me by my throat when I read it. I screamed and went through all the stages of grief when I saw there was a master list. Jack in this feels so complex bc he doesn’t know wtf he’s doing, getting a little jealous, not giving us the whole truth. I wish I could’ve been y/n in this.
Your smile by @chewingcyanide
The beginning by @luvhughes43
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Luke Hughes
I was in love by @withwritersblock
Tidal waves by @babydollmarauders
-> every mark I’ve read about in nhl fanfiction sucks and I hope the worst for them, so you can bet your toosh I didn’t feel bad for this mark either. The smut was jaw dropping, even after it finished I wanted more. I still need more. 100/10 for the drama, it was just so well paced and entertaining.
Ceilings by @wineauntie
espresso by @eleutherafairy
-> if you’re into fluffy/ hockey simps fic this is a must read, because that is exactly my type and I would bet my first born that Luke is a simp like this in real life.
definitely the annoying little brother by @heartsandhischier
the mortifying ordeal of being a 20 y/o virgin by @theemporium
-> I included this one, not only because I love it, but because it’s so hard to find fic where you genuinely believe it portrays the character right. In this case everything about the writing felt so realistic, from the details of the apartment down to the smut. I’m clawing at the bars of my enclosure for the next chapter 😩
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Trevor Zegras
Friends with benefits by @sunkissed-zegras
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Andrei Svechnikov
Sunkissed by @sydnikov
-> so embarrassing to say, but when I stumbled upon this I read part 2 by accident, but boy was I happy I did. The drama, the possibility he was gonna stay with his girl, HIM COMING WITH THE BOYS AFTER Y/N AND HIM FELL OUT. Ugh it was perfection, a definite 10/10.
The one by @holy-pucks
Every summer has a story by @comphy-and-cozy
Fuck it if I cant have us by @sunkissed-zegras
Take me back to eden by @mendeshoney
Part 2 take me back to eden pt 2
-> this was one of my first andrei fics i read, bitch when I tell you i was hooked immediately. I didn’t want it to end. The power this fictional, mature and seasoned andrei svechhnikov has over me is actually so embarrassing to admit.
Power play of the heart by @heartsandhischiers
415 notes · View notes
lovekt · 10 months
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⋆ 。˚ ⋆。 SLEEPY NIGHTS IN NOVEMBER ⋆ 。˚ ⋆。
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pairing; lando norris x girlfriend!fem!reader
word count; 1.5k
blurb; where practice goes on for a little longer than expected, and you’re extremely jetlagged. (based off of the las vegas gp fp2)
author’s note; this is my first completed fic ahhh! cant believe i actually finished something for once in my life this is a miracle
<< the library , ln4 masterist >>
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LAS VEGAS WAS A BRIGHT CITY. So bright, and yet you were still battling with all-consuming darkness.
You’d arrived more than twelve hours ago. Cameras flashed, questions asked, your mind had been buzzing with excitement for the ever-anticipated Grand Prix at the new track. Hundreds of people; reporters, fans, drivers, bustled about. Drones and tripods followed your every move, microphones bursting your personal bubble, screaming people begging for their caps, shirts and babies to be signed. It crossed your mind more than once that you weren’t a driver, yet the cheers of sheer joy echoed when you walked by.
It was exhilarating, truly. You’d never imagined your life would turn out this way, your face being plastered onto live television, a banner across the bottom presenting you as Lando Norris’ girlfriend.
You’d arrived just in time for Free Practice 2, not getting a chance to find the man in orange before he was off and onto the track for the second time two hours later than scheduled. However, you were soon supplied with a pair of noise-cancelling headphones and a chair to get comfortable with.
It was colder than usual. Your eyes were permanently fixated on the screen above you. No matter how many times you’d watched your boyfriend race, in person or in the comfort of your shared home, it was never any less terrifying. The noises of pure acceleration, the sparks that would occasionally burst from the back of the car, the knowledge of what could happen and what’s already happened several times before. All of it was enough to keep you on your toes, wide awake, and alert every time.
Every single time, except this one.
The low hum of the engine through your headphones did nothing to help you stay focused, time finally beginning to creep its way back up to you. Your boyfriend’s voice calmly updating his engineers, the muffled chatter of the garage, all of it caused your mind to numb and breathing to begin evening out. It was so late. So, so late, and cold.
Your head suddenly lulled to the side causing your eyes to snap open, saving yourself before you slipped off the plastic foldable chair. God, you hoped the live broadcasting cameras were not allowing thousands of eyes to see you right now.
There were some eyes, though, that had seen you. The engineers dressed in orange pottering around were chuckling, they themselves trying to stay awake by toying with tools and fidgeting with other mechanical things that you didn’t understand. Most of them you were quite friendly with by now as you were a frequent member of the McLaren garage, and they all knew you were the one to go to whenever Lando needed a break. They were grateful to have you. An angry Lando is never a fun time.
Which is exactly why they decided to make an executive decision to save you from the concrete floor below. It was only a matter of time before you ended up hurting yourself.
The screen above you began blurring once more, eyes drooping against your will when a hand placed itself onto your shoulder. One of the engineers that Lando was particularly close with was smiling down at you, softly nudging you forward and guiding you to stand up. You looked at him, eyes glossy and brows furrowed, confused.
He sighed amusedly, “I think it’s time for bed.”
Slight slurred protests began to slip out of your lips but were stopped when you wobbled and had to grip onto the top of the chair for balance. The engineer’s hold on your arm tightened and your exhaustion was too heavy to resist as he began leading you towards the driver’s rooms.
You glanced back at the screen showing your boyfriend’s perspective of the car, not wanting to leave but knowing that it’s probably for the best. There wasn’t any action going on, every driver was tired, nobody was pulling any dangerous moves. It was safe enough to walk away, just for a little bit, just this once.
The door to Lando’s driver’s room was opened and you settled onto the small sofa in the corner, wrapping yourself in a papaya-coloured blanket. Darkness enveloped the room as the engineer flipped the switch, shutting the door quietly behind him and leaving you to your thoughts for all of two seconds before a soft voice filled your ears. You’d forgotten to take the headphones off.
Lando spoke to his team, his voice calm and soothing, almost as if he knew you were falling into the depths of unconsciousness in that moment. He was safe. You felt safe.
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The second he’d hauled himself out of the car, helmet removed, and interviews finished up, he was on the search for you. Often, you would wander off as soon as the car had been parked, for a bathroom break or to have a quick snack, refusing to do it during the race.
He walked back to his room as fast as possible, weaving between hundreds of people who he didn’t bother giving the time of day. Usually, he would’ve stopped and had a little chat, but it was so, so late and his whole body felt like it was about to crumble. All he wanted was to find you, get changed and make the small trek back to your shared hotel room.
The door was unlocked when he arrived, a sure sign that you were inside and waiting. But when he opened the door ready to be greeted with a sweet kiss, all he was met with was complete darkness. Weird.
His hand reached for the switch and light flooded the room. Sure enough, there you were, cuddled up in his bright orange blanket and sound asleep. Your face was half covered and smushed into the arm rest, knees curled into yourself and a set of headphones askew on top of your mussed hair.
The smile that had etched itself onto his face grew when he noticed the headphones. You’d fallen asleep whilst listening to him talk, even when he wasn’t with you. Even when you were jetlagged, cold, and exhausted, you still made sure he was okay. His chest warmed at the thought.
Lando placed the bottle of water he was holding down onto the table beside him, trying his best to be as quiet as possible as he changed from his suit to a hoodie. You didn’t move a muscle, only light breaths filling the silent space.
You looked so peaceful, lashes fluttering every so often. The urge to try and squeeze himself onto the sofa with you was strong, but the more logical side of him told him that it was finally time to head back to the hotel, and if you stayed in that position much longer then your neck would be unbearably stiff by tomorrow morning. He loved you more than anything in the world, so he knew you well enough to know that you would be moaning to him about it once you’d woken up, and not the moaning that he enjoyed hearing.
 Carefully, he brushed the tips of his fingers across your cheek, moving a few stray strands of hair. Your cheeks were warm, a contrast to Lando’s cool touch that caused you to pull your face away and tuck it further into the safety of his blanket. His lips twitched slightly. You would hate him for this now, but thank him later, he thought, as he swiftly curled his fingers around the edge of the blanket and pulled it down.
Your skin, exposed to the night air, broke out into goosebumps as you wrapped your arms tighter around yourself. Lando slowly rubbed his palm up and down your arm, bringing his lips to your forehead and kissing you softly.
Your eyelids fluttered open, pupils narrowing to the bright light of the room as an almost silent groan escaped you.
Your eyes darted around for a moment before landing on your boyfriend, crouched down beside you with his hand stroking your hair. He was smiling at you lovingly, eyes squinted and laced with a tinge of mischief. “G’morning, baby.”
You didn’t reply, instead choosing to open your mouth in a yawn directed straight at his face. He chuckled quietly.
“I think it’s time we get you to bed, hm?”
You rested your head back against the armrest, closing your eyes once more, “I’m already in bed.”
“I’m sure you are.” He said, before rising back up to his full height and slipping one hand underneath your neck, wrapping his arm around your shoulders, and the other around the back of your knees. Your hand instinctively curled around his bicep as you were lifted into the air, taking note in the back of your mind at how effortlessly he seemed to manoeuvre you.
As Lando began to carefully place you onto your feet, a wave of adoration filled you to the core. He’d just been working for hours straight, and yet here he was taking care of you. The love you had for this boy was absolutely unmatched.
And what better way to show him this than by using the little energy you had restored during your nap to rise onto your tiptoes and press a sweet kiss against his awaiting lips.
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@lovekt
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serejae · 1 month
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I CAN TRY BUT I CANT HIDE IT FROM YOU | J.WW
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introvert wonwoo bf thoughts
for my wonwoo babies :), sorry for inactivity school started 😢
mentions of dress to impress 😏
even though wonwoo isnt good at cooking hes always making your lunches. HE HAS THOSE LUNCHABLES ON DECK. and trust hes snacking up your lunch box
^he never forgets to put a toothpick in there for you just incase (as someone with braces this makes my stomach have butterflies)
i believe he secretly had made a sims family of you and him with 2 kids and 3 pets. he even spent time making your dream home
speaking of gaming, i know whenever you both play scary games, hes always going first and risk his characters life to save yours. if you both were running from the monster hes behind you making sure youre is safe first
wonwoo doesnt care if seungcheol or jeonghan constantly clown him but he always WILL play dress to impress with you. he always votes your outfit 5 stars even if youre completely off theme or have only shoes and hair on
if you get hate on your outfit in the chat he doesnt defend you in the chat because hes just introvert. but, he will spam report the person until theyre kicked or banned
wonwoo is the type to always agree to you “the restaurant is an hour away baby…ROAD TRIP THEN!”, he always listens to your rants even if its the most randomest or boring thing he will stare at you with heart eyes as you speak and agree “yeah i cant believe she’d do that…”
adding onto the last one he will throw you under the bus to get out of situations. (i love introverts) he didnt wanna go to the after party? “sorry my partner just called, i gotta get home” or the “my partner said no, sorry” yes, you tweak a bit because what if your reputation is ruined but you know he’lll keep using it as an excuse T-T
he’ll do all the tiktok trends you want, you wanna kiss all over his face? YES! you wanna wanna do a small tiktok dance? YES! you wanna do a couple fit check with your matching outfits and creeper keychains? YES! and trust, while hes doing the tiktok dances he has a big smile on his face that make his glasses go up from his big cheeks whike smiling. and please. hes reposting it on all his apps.
in real life he already barely post selfies, but if you were his partner his social media is a you fan account, his profile picture is you, all his highlights covers are you and full of you, his post are all you, and his bio has you tagged
he BEGS you to match usernames in games and on discord like even if you dont play or use the app he’ll still keep it
LIKE PLSSLSLSL IMAGINE IT FOR ME
“ilovethemsomuch” is typing…
“canheleavemealone” sent you one notification
if hes a idol in this universe, he’ll go crazy on stage using his deep voice (we know…lalali…) then as soon as he sees you backstage hes running to hug you while bringing you guys to a corner to be alone as he mumbles sweet words “missed you baby” “lets go home and cuddle?” “im so lucky to have you”
hes the small spoon, he loves being big spoon but at night after all the protecting hes done for you, he just needs a little recharge with laying ontop of you while he hides his face in your neck as you run your hands through his hair
man is the definition of gentle love. cannot convice me other wise
in arguments, never argues back. just sits there allows you to speak, yell, get everything out your system and pays attention to you speaking so he can see what he needs to reassure, clear, and tell you
in big dinner parties, whether in a restaurant or house hes always sitting by you. in these big settings he never wants to leave your side, he holds your hand and plays with the promise ring he had gotten you
wonwoo loves it when you take off his glasses. he sometimes pretends to sleep so you can take off his glasses and kiss nose. you never told him but you slowly figured out when his cheeks redden each time
babe hes so obsessed with you. has your picture as his gaming pc lockscreen, homescreen, and even google screen. his password on everything is your birthday and if the members figure that out its your anniversary, and if they figure that one out, its the first time you two kissed
has your initials made with little gemstones of your favorite color on the side of his headphones and controller
has a polariod picture of you on his monitor, and on his desk
loves being the underdressed boyfriend when necessary. of course wont be underdressed all the time but he has his moments when youre shining and hes just…there…….(he loves you being the spotlight)
also loves it when you order for him, dont get him wrong, he’ll order for you no hesitation but sometimes his social battery runs low……
wonwoo i need
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princesssmars · 5 months
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i'd love just about anyone, so why was it you?
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a victoria neuman x reader
your talent for singing is finally starting to take you places in the city of lights. so why did it have to introduce you to a woman who might ruin it all?
wc : 10.248
contains : fxf relationship. readers hair and skin aren't described. fluff. angst.nsfw including sex and language. the french. barely proof-read.
a/n : i cant believe there are no fics for this fine ass woman yet but i am nothing but a pioneer idk. in my daydreams this was like mafia au victoria but i literally never write or dream of those so i opted out lmao. go watch gen v. everyone always talks about how good the cover is but nonante-cinq by angele is a beautiful album so i recommend listening to that for french vibes. enjoy <3
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it was the most stereotypical and overplayed song ever, but damn did you love la vie en rose.
just the concept of the song was romantic to you. to live every day like it would be magnificent, like you could know a day would be your last and look back at it and not regret a single thing. it meant looking at the world with a positivity that these days was mostly faked or artificial.
after the life you've lived, the things you've seen firsthand, you need that positive light in your life more than anything else. especially right now, as your manager is hounding you over the phone about your next gig.
now you loved your manager, nancy, you really did. she took you in and was honest when no one else would be, stood by you when no one else wanted to give you a real chance. but sometimes it felt like she didn't really believe in you. obviously, she believed you had talent, or else she would have 'left you in the dust for the rats to pick apart,' in her own words. it was almost like she couldn't fathom that what you had was real, like you didn't truly deserve all the things that were coming to you.
but as long as you were paying her, she didn't bother to speak up on it.
you were listening to her drone on and on into the speaker from your phone, holding the object up to your ear with one hand as you hold a menu to order something from the cafe waitress who's waiting beside you.
"ill have an uhhhh... le marie antoinette, and a coffee with sugar and cream please," you hand the menu to the waitress after she writes down your order, heading back into the cafe with a smile. this cafe was one of your favorites, nestled below an apartment building in one of the inner city arrondissements so you could sit outside beneath an umbrella and admire the city before you. "nancy, i don't see why i can't just...politely turn it down? it sounds like it's a glorified pin-up girl gig, le bellevilloise is offering for me to sing there exclusively for three months-"
"no, that's what im trying to tell you if you'd let me finish." you can hear nancy's telltale sigh through the phone. she had a short temper when she was stressed, something you sadly had in common, and you could hear her clicking a pen through the receiver. "this is an international gala slash fundraiser, attended by the one percent of the one percent. billionaires, senators, diplomats, everything. the event organizer asked for you specifically, so turning it down is a bad look. aka, you're doing it. go out and get a pretty dress. ill send you more details later."
the phone shut off and you let out a huff of air, crossing your right leg over your left beneath the table. once you have your meal and bite into your pastry you can't help but close your eyes at how good it tastes; the combination of the crunch of the macarons, the near-overwhelming sweetness of the cream, and the savory juice that leaks from the raspberries never gets old.
you don't know how you feel about this whole gala thing. sure its a great way to make connections and earn a fat stack of cash that will probably last you few weeks, but you've learned before that the people that you most admire, celebrities, politicians, even superheroes, can't be trusted. and being in a room full of them to perform wasn't at the top of your christmas wish list.
but like everyone else in the world, you were finding money hard to pass up on. just by the lowball nancy told you, you'd be able to comfortably pay the next month's rent and fix up your electric scooter, maybe even enough to save up for that beautiful flat you saw online with the grand windows and nice floor plan.
it'd only be a few hours of singing and kissing up to a bunch of snobs and you'd be done. easy peasy.
finding a dress wasn't to hard. your modeling connections from before you started to focus on singing gave you access to a few, good quality clearance pieces for your picking. you figure that the people you were performing for would prefer something classy and elegant, so you picked out a sleeveless black dress with black opera gloves, accessorized by a diamond necklace and earrings. one of your stylist friends, alex, who you asked to help do up your hair told you 'you're definitely gonna shag a rich man looking like this, just ask them if they have any friends for me!' and after a quick 'please don't wish that upon me' and a spritz of perfume you were ready.
the hours before you got on stage were nothing short of both nerve-racking but exhilarating. you rode in a standard taxi, your slight jitters noticed by the slightly balding man in the front. he eyes you pretty oddly when you got in the car before using you if you were a model, telling you that his daughter would like an autograph if you were. you felt slightly flustered when you had to tell him you weren't, but gave him some tips to tell his daughter if she wanted to pursue it. after around twenty minutes of driving through the city the car stops and you're escorted by a crew member into a grand building, those types you pass by and dream of getting the chance just to step into.
after that its a rush of meeting the event planner who gives you another run down of the evening and then meeting with the band members, a nice group of jazz players who you had heard about on the news for their blends of old and new methods of performing music. they played you a piece on their instruments in their dressing room, and it felt like hanging out with old friends listening to tunes as one twirled you around and the others laughed and the air felt warm and fuzzy.
later its time for your set, where you'll sing as the guests come in and take occasional breaks to save your breath and let whoever is hosting this talk. so you get up on your mini stage, make sure you look alright and you're in tune with the band, and then you do what you do best.
you've never felt better than how you do while you sing. every time you do so you tell a story, tales of success and tragedy and love and heartache. while you sing your favorite thing to do is to admire the crowd. when you were younger it gave you horrible stage fright, but as you grew up and saw just how much people loved your voice it made you confident, if not the tiniest bit narcissistic.
as you look out at the guests of tonight you see what's expected. important and powerful men donned in suits, their wives standing on their arms in glamourous gowns, you swear that you even see some fairly famous celebs in the mix, and they were all listening intently to you and your voice.
and that's when you saw her. near the back of the room with a glass of red wine in her hand, dark hair flowing over her shoulders, and darker eyes trained on you. in this profession you get used to people staring at you for hours on end, but something about this woman unnerves you slightly.
a short while later your set is over and after a round of applause the organizer tells you to enjoy yourselves, and that you're free to indulge in whatever food is left. after a brief touch-up in the dressing room and making sure you look presentable, you head out to get yourself something to eat. you keep getting stopped by people telling you how beautiful your performance was, how they'd love to get in contact with your agent to book you for future events, and your regular dose of creepy old guys hitting on you. but besides that things were going pretty well.
some servers were waking around with trays of champagne, but you figured since everything was complimentary you would treat yourself to something stronger. you head to the bar and order yourself a strong cocktail, and as soon as you finish your order a figure sits on the stool next to yours.
"get me a scotch on the rocks, thanks."
you glance at them from the corner of your eye and feel your heart beat faster when you see
it's the woman from before. from this close distance, you can admire her entirely, and god is she gorgeous. she looks so put together, not a hair out of place, and wearing a perfectly tailored suit that makes you guess she's some kind of wealthy businesswoman.
after not so secretly checking her out, she turns her body towards you and looks at you with a smile.
"im sure you already know, but you have an enchanting voice."
you look down bashfully, thinking the same about her. she speaks like she's so sure of what she's saying like there's no room for debate or argument.
"thank you. no matter if i know or not, it doesn't take much to make me a little nervous every time i perform."
the bartender brings over both of your drinks and she tilts hers to you.
"trust me, theres no need. you're nothing but a natural, one of the best singers i've ever heard."
"ah, now you're exaggerating. is there a reason you're complimenting me like you're being paid to do so?"
she shakes her head, setting down her glass of liquor with a clink. "not anything nefarious, if that's what you're thinking. just glad i get to talk to a beautifully talented woman."
jeez, she was laying it on thick. normally this was coming from some fifty-year-old man with greasy skin and weird teeth, but it felt nice coming from her. she was obviously gorgeous, leaving her body language open in case you wanted to decline and she would walk away in a moment's notice.
"im glad i get to talk to you too, miss?"
"victoria. its a pleasure to talk to you, miss y/n."
for around an hour or two the both of you sat at that bar, blocking out the fake laughs of investors and boisterous noises of people who got a little too friendly with the free champagne. she was so attentive to you. asking about what got you into singing and what brought you to paris by your non-native accent. you normally kept the finer details of your past a close-guarded secret, but you figured there couldn't come any harm from telling this attractive stranger a few things about yourself before never seeing her again.
"you're telling me at only sixteen years old, you flew to paris by yourself and made a living for yourself? you've got balls on you, sister."
"yeah yeah, but im nothing special. i just got tired of all the bullshit in the u.s., y'know? the greed, the cynicism, the-"
"superhero bullshit?"
you giggled while she smirked, observing your smile and how it made your eyes squinch.
"well i wouldn't put it like that but...superheros? really? its just, they make it so american, in a really really annoying way. i just couldn't deal with that being a reality. and where better than paris? it seems like voughts all but forgotten about it recently, thank god.”
"i understand. and i know we just met, but it does suit you. 'beautiful runaway finds passion, life, and love in the city of lights'. best cliche there is."
"and what a damn good cliche it is to be. although i haven't been that lucky on the love front."
her eyebrow raises and her nail traces around the rim of her glass.
"im sorry but i simply cant believe that. someone like you would have people lining up for a chance to talk to you, let alone date you."
you dryly chuckle before taking another long swig of your glass of champagne, dancing just on the edge of being intoxicated. you understood why everyone else was drinking this, it was sweet but strong.
"people have tried, of course. but sadly most of my escapades end in tragedy. very melodramatically. but enough about me, I'm guessing this isn't gonna go my way and you have someone waiting for you at home?"
"im offended you still think so low of me. but no, there was someone but it didn't work out. now its just me and my daughter."
god, she was a milf. if there was a god you prayed he would let you get lucky tonight.
"well, im sorry to hear it didnt work out."
"are you really?"
she looks at you with a smirk on her face.
"no, im not."
that was all she needed to ask you to come back with her to her hotel.
and not just any hotel, she was rich enough to be spending two weeks in the damn ritz. asking again what she did for a living didn't get you very far, the only hint you got being that it helped her change the world. ominous but whatever. it had to be legitimate if she was invited to that gala.
the cautious and common sense side of you is snuffed out for the night the moment she set her hand over the covered skin of your thigh in the car, the feeling of her hand on your lower back leading you through the pristine lobby of the hotel, that same hand helping you take off your dress and take you apart slowly over the rest of the night.
when you wake up the sun is peeking through the curtains, the softness of the sheets your laying on calling you back to sleep before you get up and look around.
you only got a few seconds to admire the room last night before victoria was on you, and now in the light of day you could truly take everything in. you find a note left by the woman, letting you know she had to leave temporarily for an important job thing and that she'd be back my lunch, inviting you to call up room service and enjoy the room intil then.
you were expecting for her to tell you to pack your shit up and go, so despite the oddness this was a nice surprise. besides, there was no way you were gonna pass up on ordering a five-star breakfast you didnt have to pay for.
after indulging in a meal brought by room service and finding ways to pass the time, you text your manager after she happily lets you know that your night was a success and that your payment should be cleared shortly. while you're in the middle of wondering if you should answer her query about the host wondering where you wandered off to last night, the sound of a door opening makes your head jerk towards the small entry area, victoria coming in through the doorway dressed in a tan suit and carrying a large black briefcase on her arm.
"ah, youre still here!,” she sets her bag on a glass table near the door and strides into the room, eyes connected with yours the whole time. you weren’t feeling nervous before, but under her gaze you wonder if maybe you should have taken that free meal along with some tiny soaps from the bathroom and headed back home.
“yeah, figured i’d stick around for whatever. besides, i had to stay and blame you for my manager thinking i got kidnapped.”
“i’ll make sure to apologize and send her an edible arrangement. besides, i hope to take up more of your time in the future.”
your eyes bulge so hard you’re sure you look like a moron. you cover it up by getting up to get yourself another cup of coffe from the tray the food came in on.
“well i should’ve guessed this was more than a one night stand when you allowed me to order up breakfast. but now i have to admit i’m slightly scared you’re actually plotting to traffick me.”
"trust me, that wouldn't be good for business. id just like to see you some more, if that would be alright with you.
was that an actual question? after the night you had and the way she’s been treating you, you didn’t see much of a choice except to say yes.
she tells you that a few hours later she has a flight back to america, but that she wouldn't mind spending the day with you if you're free. you agree to get a little bite to eat and it turns into a whirlwind day of showing her around the city you call your home. she has to wear giant sunglasses the whole time and have a mysterious security detail not too far behind, but you wouldn't change anything about it.
at the end of it all, she bids you goodbye in front of your taxi, admiring the cute outfit she bought for you so you wouldn't have to go home in your dress from the night prior, promising that she'll keep in touch with you once she gets settled in back a new york, jokingly telling you she'll send you a postcard. as you sit in the back of the taxi, your heart inflates a little as you take in the events of the last day. you never liked to mix business with pleasure in this way, partly because most of those business people were gross perverts and also that it could damage your career beyond repair, but with victoria you can't help but think that it was worth it.
eventually, a few days pass by, and the only calls you've gotten are from friends congratulating on what they heard was another great performance. and as nice as all the praise and the new gigs you started to get felt, the longer you heard no word back from victoria, it started to eat away at you inside.
back at your favorite cafe you sit with two of your oldest friends, jamie and chloe, as they ramble about the details of their changing lives and jobs. you don't know when you zoned out but eventually, chloe's manicured finger lightly pokes at your cheek, giggling when you make a playful motion to bite it.
"where'd you go just now? take me with you before jamie keeps talking about his new lover."
"hey!" jamie pouts, "you're just jealous because i've been regularly having passionate sex allll night long while you're still vying over your boss." you hear a shocked gasp behind him and you all turn to see an elderly couple looking at jamie like he's said the most blasphemous thing they've ever heard.
"really classy, james." you snort.
"what the hell! you're supposed to be on my side! everyone has noticed how you've been in a better mood since that gala. alex told us how they checked up on you afterwise and you showed up a day later with a new outfit and a hickey on your neck."
"that is- god, that’s so intrusive and so like them,” you rolled your eyes. you knew as soon as alex saw you that morning that they’d be gossiping to everyone about the state they saw you in. “and i don’t kiss and tell like that. at least not in public like this.”
“ok, so we’ll stop by your place tonight with some wine and talk all about it tonight. agree?”
“what? no-”
“agree!” chloe beams and shakes hands with jamie across the table, blowing you kisses before leaving her share of the bill on the table and leaving with some excuse of having to be somewhere. you glare at jamie as a warning before he gives you a kiss on the cheek and does the same. you grumble before biting into your muffin.
a few hours later you’re sitting on your soft sofa with jamie’s head in your lap and chloe on the other side, talking and laughing about old stories from your jobs. you take a sip of merlot right before jamie brings up what you were hoping they’d forgotten about by now.
“ok ok, enough chatter. seriously, chlo, you cackle like a seagull. y/n, when are you going to tell us about this mystery lover of yours? do you need another glass of wine to start talking?”
“don’t even think about pouring me another glass. look, there’s not much to say, ok? i was singing, she was staring at me from across the bar, we flirted a little, that was it!”
they stared.
“you want more?”
“how could we not? we haven’t seen you like this with anyone! not since we took you on that tourist tour on the seine!”
that…that took you for a spin. you remembered it clear as day, them tugging you along when they’d heard since you came to paris you’d been focusing on building up your image and working. it was more a joke, but the lights of the boat, the sky and the lights made you feel like you were in the most perfect moment of your life. hearing them compare that to how you looked now had a nervous feeling building in your gut.
“we spent the night together. and it was…good. really good. she let me stay while she went out, bought me a new outfit then said she’d be in touch.”
your friends are silent. way too silent. you’re afraid they’re about to laugh and judge you before they’re squealing and tackling you, pulling back when you groan after you almost spill your wine on your clothes.
"god, why are you always the lucky one? this isn't fair! at all!" chloe groans while dramatically resting her head on your shoulder, jamie still giggling as the wine clearly starts to take an effect on him. "please, please tell us what happens next before i scream."
"no thats- i mean, thats it. so far. for now." you stutter along your words as your friends' faces go blank yet again, except this time without a hint of a chuckle or smile.
"what the hell do you mean 'that's it.'? she ghosted you?" jamie gasps.
"no, she didnt ghost me-"
"sweetheart, im sorry to say this but you have been ghosted. in a really dickhead way."
"its not like that! she's a busy person with a serious job and a kid and responsibilities!"
you briefly hear chloe snicker "milf?" before you roll your eyes.
"she's gonna contact me. and even if she doesn't, maybe it was just a nice one-time thing! everyone knows I'm great at those."
jamie snickers before chloe smacks his shoulder in a second.
"why? why did you laugh?"
they share a look before she smacks his shoulder again.
"would you stop? i have pains, you know this. but y/n, we know you. we love you. but your latest stints haven't been...the most successful. or left you in the best headspaces."
"he's right, honey. remember the last girl, hannah? one of the worst situationships i've ever seen. you told us you would be alright when she broke it off and then we found you at that lousy bar at eleven in the morning..."
you start biting at your lip. there was nothing you hated more than when they told you the truth about how you could act. it wasn't your fault that all the time your relationships got messy, or that you got attached a little quickly. people didn't understand but a life like yours could be lonely. standing up on a stage and performing for people who want you to do just that and only that: sing and look like a glamourous pin-up doll. most of the time its the other performers who even bother to ask if your throat is alright after singing for hours.
so yes, sometimes you rushed into relationships. and you might have done it again in the dumbest way possible.
"i just...she let me stay after, y'know? and she came back and brought me with her again. why go through that effort just to leave me behind like trash?" your friends pouted before closing in to comfort you, rubbing your back and giving you small affirmations.
for a month you go into a rut. unless it's performing or going to the dentist for a checkup you don't leave your house. you become pretty good acquaintances with the grocery delivery boy, benny, who started panicking when he realized he forgot one of your items until you assured him it was fine. it wasn't the first time you'd grown so oddly attached to a romantic prospect, and it wasn't the first time you'd gotten hurt by it. you spend your time moping on your couch and binge-watching your favorite show for the third time when your phone buzzes from beside you.
nancy schmancy : call me.
you rolled your eyes. she could have just called you in the first place, but no. she had to be extra about it. you press the call button and don't have to wait even five seconds for her voice to ring in your ear.
"do you want to know what mister barbier just emailed me?"
"i think you already have that answer for me."
"he said, and i quote, 'tell y/n i send my best wishes. her performance last night was hauntingly beautiful, and i'm hoping it was one of her greatest acts yet.'"
"if you ask me, it sounds like i did a pretty good job."
"it sounds like he thought you were singing your damn suicide note!" she groaned, and you could hear her face scrunching from over the phone. "i don't know what is going on with you recently, and i don't want to sound insensitive, but if you can't manage to keep your work and personal life separate, even i can't help you make it far in this business. clients may say they want you to be expressive but they only mean so far. unhappy music means unhappy customers, capeche?"
"i understand, nancy. ill send a personal apology to mister barbier."
"good. ill call you soon to let you know about any new gigs. take care of yourself. seriously."
the line clicks and you toss your phone onto the couch and take another sip of sauvignon blanc from your rose-shaped wine glass. it pained you to admit it, but nancy had a point. if you kept letting yourself mope in your feelings you'd run out of people who wanted you to sing, and if the point came where you were out of gigs...you didn't even want to think about it. if you weren't singing you weren't living.
only a few hours after that call you manage to get back to normal. you go out and get your own groceries, deciding to indulge yourself and buy the ingredients for some recipe you saw online months ago. one of your clients cries at your performance, ecstatically telling you they'll be in talks with your manager to set up a stable contract. things really start to look up. two weeks later you even manage to get the number of a cute girl, elise, a tall woman with dyed hair who reached for the same vintage music box as you at an open market.
you're smiling as you look down at the messy ink on a slip of paper, the numbers and tiny smily face distracting you as you enter the hallway to your apartment. so distracted that you nearly trip over a object on the floor, looking down to see...a bouquet?
a really gorgeous bouquet you notice as you bend over to pick it up. its a collage of dusty blues and off-colored ivories, and when you brought it closer to your nose for a whiff you felt a sense of bliss. you bring it into your apartment with a skip in your step before you spot a piece of paper among the flowers, plucking it from the collection and reading it over.
upon closer inspection, you can see its a postcard, the cover a flattering shot of the statue of liberty with text that reads "love from new york city!". you try to calm your heart down at the location and the 'love' part, but you've already gotten your hopes up when you turn the card around to read the message:
xxx-xxx-xxxx
sorry for the wait. i'll make it up to you, angel.
you'd never felt so conflicted as you did in the past five seconds. half of you was vindicated that yes, this attractive woman didnt leave you high and dry and did actually have a deeper interest in you, but the other part was angry. and embarrassed that you were angry, because again, you spent less than a day with this woman, she didn't owe you anything. but also yes the hell she did.
before you could get yourself together you were harshly tapping the number into your cell, biting at your lip as the phone slowly rings.
"y/n, is that you?" echoes from the line, victorias voice sounding and running over your head like soft silk. no, no, stop it. focus.
"howd you know it was me? im sure you have other people who'd be calling you this late."
"certainly not anyone with a phone number from paris. besides, i was hoping it'd be you."
"well, i would have been flattered two weeks ago but unfortunately i dont think your words could phase me right now."
she sighs and the line goes silent. you feel bad for being catty for a few seconds before you brush it off. she's the one who played with your emotions and promised to call you but never did. she had this coming.
"im sorry, really i am. i've been busy with things at work and my daughter-"
damn it, she pulled the kid card again.
"i just...dont like being lied to. or led on. maybe its my fault for beeing too clingy-"
"no, no. dont apologize. if it means anything youve been on my mind for weeks now."
"yeah, same here. except my thoughts havent been all that nice." you laugh.
"deserved. and id like to make it up to you."
"oh yeah? let me guess, this time we'll spend two nights together?"
"close. how about two weeks. in new york."
you don't know if you should laugh. you feel like you should, so you do. but she isn't.
"you...you're being serious."
"im being serious."
what do you even say? what do you even do? of course, whatever higher power there is would make your life stable and steady for the past few months then throw this in to shake you up. you really should have been expecting it, considering...
you shake yourself back to the present. victoria is still waiting on the other line, unwilling to rush you into a decision, apparently. you'd applaud her for her chivalry if you weren't so stunned.
"victoria, come on. we've only met once, and while it was nice it was brief. now you want me to upend my life and career to jet off to america? it sounds crazy."
"you make me a bit crazy, honestly. besides, you were telling me in bed you haven't been in the states since you left, i have a feeling you miss it more than you let on."
you shuffle in your spot, reminded that you're standing in your cold-ass kitchen and you haven't changed out of the outfit you wore out today. but half of your uncomfortableness is from a feeling gnawing at your chest because she's right. at this point you can barely remember the night you left your childhood home, but you know it was rushed. you wanted to forget everything.
"i think you're also forgetting that i have a blossoming career here. are you gonna pay my definitely going to be pissed off manager her wages? plus i was supposed to be first pick for this really good gig-"
"i'll pay for everything, i promise. dont forget that i have connections. in two weeks they''ll be singing you praises across the globe."
you close your eyes and take in a breath.
"can you make my ticket first class?"
-
one thing you didnt miss about america? just how...much everything was, all the time.
your flight was quiet. victoria didnt hesitate to book you an expensive ticket, almost taking offense to your request for a nice one and scheduling you for business class, sending you a text to get lots of rest in the ultra-luxe beds on the plane. it was probably one of the best nights sleeps you'd had in months.
when you got off the plane there were two tall escorts holding a sign with your last name on it, taking the suitcases from your hands before you could say anything and leading you into a sleek black car. a voice in the back of your head starts screaming but you ignore it. for now.
the men in the car give you some basic rundowns, how they'll constantly be hovering over you during your stay for your "protection", and that they'll be taking you to settle into a hotel until victoria makes contact, and the little voice starts freaking out again and telling you that you've slept with and are fraternizing with a mob boss. at least it's more exciting than your last few flings.
the car goes silent after that, and you put in your earbuds as you watch the city go by. you weren't from new york, but you loved watching movies set in the bustling cityscape. the buildings really are humongous, and you see so many different types of people it sets your brain on a whirlwind.
you look back down at your phone after the fifth 'the seven' advertisement in one block.
yet again you're led into a clearly extremely expensive hotel, breezing through reception before you are led to a luxuriant hotel room, the bodyguards ignoring you as you giggle and flop onto the bed, waving them off when they tell you they'll be posted outside.
the sheets feel heavenly on your skin, and with the soft sunshine from the window beaming down on you and the gentle hustle and bustle of new york outside, you think you could fall asleep in a minute. but, begrudgingly, you peel yourself form the bed and open your suitcase to start putting your clothes away before taking a quick shower in the giant bathtub.
just as you exit the shower and wrap your body in a towel, your phone starts ringing and as soon as you read the 'v' in the contact name you push answer and bring it to your ear.
"hello? vic?"
"hey, hon. eager to talk to me?"
"you called me. and 'hon'? really? we've moved to petnames already?"
"figured id start making up for those weeks with no contact. and id like to do so again tonight. i wanna bring you somewhere."
your mouth quirks up in a smile as you re-adjust the towel around your body, the phone nearly slipping from its quick placement between your phone and ear, "id really like that. i hope its out to dinner, i didnt care to eat any of the plane food."
“yes, it’s to dinner. but its up to you if you want it to be fancy or casual. i know its tacky but there’s this pretty cute french place near where i live...”
“that vaguely sounds like an invitation to your place, but ill let it slide. are you gonna pick me up or are your special agents going to escort me everywhere for the next few weeks?”
“special agents? what agents?”
a bead of water drips from your neck down your back and it feels like the tip of a knife. a pressure builds in the back of your throat and your fingers grip the fabric of your towel. “what…that’s a joke, right?”
her laughter rings in your ear and you are seconds away from hanging up the call.
“sorry, sorry. i sometimes have a weird sense of humor. you'll get used to it.”
“i doubt it.”
“and i'm hopeful. i'll let you go so you can get ready, i'll be by in under an hour.”
you hang up after a sweet goodbye and gently sit on the toilet. your brain is rushing to catch up after the conversation like your body goes on autopilot when you hear victoria's voice. its terrifying and its thrilling. and you don't know why a part of you likes the feeling.
after you brush your teeth, do some quick skincare, debate over shaving just in case, and spend twenty minutes picking out a cute outfit, you finally hear the gentle knocking on the door while you're double-checking over the content of your purse.
rushing to open the door, you're greeted with the sight of a smiling victoria, her hands tucked into the pants of her clearly expensive pinstriped pantsuit. you're admiring the look of her hair tucked back into a ponytail when she's reaching forward and pressing a soft kiss to your cheek.
"you look perfect. come on, i made us a reservation."
and it turned out to be a perfect night. she did end up taking you to the french place, allowing you to order whatever you wanted. that place was weirdly empty, only a handful of other patrons inside. you were pleased to see that the waitress was french herself, having a small chat about the customs and foods she missed while she praised the authenticity of the food at the restaurant.
only a day and you had already forgotten how forward the people back home could be, because the waitress throws a subtle look at victoria and compliments you on finding such an attractive woman. when she leaves vic just smiles.
“ok, id say at this point we’re doing pretty good with the communication thing, right?” you ask, taking a sip of the pricey wine your date ordered.
“yeah, id say that.”
you finger the rim of your glass, the nerves getting to you before you ask your question. "i want you to tell me what your job is. your actual job, not some vague ass title. you have security following gus around, so i feel like i should know."
"no, no, you're right. i just didnt wanna scare you off. or have you think differently of me once i told you." she sighs, thumbing the napkins on the table. "i work in the government. i'm a congresswoman, to be exact."
you don't doubt she's a politician for a second, because she shows no hint of nervousness at your lack of emotion.
"are you...a good congresswoman?"
"i don't really know how to answer that." she laughs.
"i'm sorry. i knew you were important enough to be at that gala, but a politician is...tricky."
she reaches across the table and lays her hand palm up, smiling when you rest yours on top of it. "look, i get it. i should have told you sooner but please understand why i didn't. i wanted to get to know you as normally as possible, without all of the press and politics in the way."
"normally as possible, huh? that includes sleeping together on the first night?"
you're trying to show your acceptance of the situation with your humor, but you can tell victoria can sense your uneasiness at the situation. here you were thinking you had found some under-the-radar millionaire to dote on you and instead, you'd roped in someone whose job was entirely in the public eye that could be put in danger at the flip of a switch.
"how about we finish up and take this back to my place? i'll tell you everything that you wanna know about me. no matter how personal."
you stare into her eyes for a few seconds and decide that she looks genuine, getting confirmation that her daughter is staying with a friend before ending your meal and following her to her place.
for the amount of money she's ready to spend on you, you're surprised to see that victoria lives in a chic but quaint townhome only a twenty-minute walk from the restaurant. she gently takes off your coat and instructs you to sit with her on the couch, pressing on a remote to turn on her fireplace.
after a few hours and two more glasses of wine, victoria had opened up to you about nearly everything in her life. the mysterious death of her birth family, being adopted by a man who helped pushed her to go into a political career, her polite but loveless marriage with her ex. she even shows you a picture of zoe that she has in her wallet, taking the chance to gush over her daughter. she seems like such a sweet girl.
maybe it's the wine or maybe it's the way vic is opening up to you so freely, but you decide to tell her more about your past. how you always wondered why you barely stuggled moving to another continent at such a young age, or the fact that you dont even remeber why you had the drive to leave your parents home in the first place. you didnt even remember the last words you said to each other.
and throughout it all she's nothing if not attentive, she doesnt ask questions unless you give her permission too, keeping her eyes on you and gently placing her hand over yours.
you feel a turning in your stomach when she moves a stray hand of hair behind your ear. you told yourself to try taking things slow this time, but your body is starting to feel fuzzy and shes looking at you like she wants to devour you.
she decides to indulge you and gently brushes her lips against yours, smiling at the way your breath staggers. your head moves forwards to finaly get her to kiss you but she jerks her head back.
"i want you to tell me what to do."
god, your stomach feels hot. this is new, but a really arousing style of new. the last time you both slept together she had taken a careful but unwavering charge, unraveling you with a steady hand a sweet smile.
"cmon just...please?"
"no. tell me what you want me to do."
you sigh and bite at your lip. "i want you to lay me down and fuck me. right now."
so she laid you down and she did. there were no words to describe how much you enjoyed that night on her couch, the way she could read your body like a book and brought you to ecstasy again and again and again...
and when you wake up a soft blanket is draped over your body, a brekfast of coffee and some crepes set in front of you.
the days after are a whirlwind. discreetly as possible victoria takes you on a tour of new york city, to more expensive restaurants and hidden jewels that most tourists skipped over.
youre lounging in your hotel room when you decide to inform your friends of how your trip is going. while slightly hesitant they seemed more than happy that you were enjoying yourself with someone who took a genuine interest in you.
until you told them her job.
"my love, are you insane? a politician?"
"an american politician?" chloe gasps, continuing off of jamies shock.
"hey, im american too dont forget!"
"of course you are, but please, you understand why this is not good, no?"
"you know how fishy they are, especially with all the supe business going on. that place is getting more dangerous by the day, and i dont think you should be seeing someone whos contirbuting to that."
it pained you to admit it but jamie had a point. the three of you would always laugh in amused horror at how badly things were going on in your birth country, and the politics...it was less than pleasant.
not to mention the supe business. every corner of the world had to deal with the annoyance that was vought and their "products", even france. but so far you'd just had to deal with a few perverted looks from traveling supers and talks of some stupid theme park a few miles out of the city. meanwhile, it seemed like every day a new superhero was being introduced to the American public. it unnerved you.
"i understand. i appreciate both of you looking out for me. trust me, i'll be on my guard for now on." you mumble, picking at the material of your sleeve.
"of course, songbird. we'll call again soon."
the call ends and drop your phone on the nightstand. you look at the eiffel tower cutout in your phone case and your heart aches.
the next morning you're eating a a breakfast of coffee and fruit crepes when your phone rings, dragging your atttention away from the trashy dating show you were watching on the bedroom's tv. when you see nancy's name you hesitantly answer the call.
"nance? is everything alright?"
"everything is great. i'm just here to check in about your next gig."
"my next- nance, im on vacation. please tell you didnt forget and booked me for a job when im across the ocean."
"no, im not that stupid, hon." she sighs. "i didnt even arrange this job, victoria did. im just the messenger."
you blink once. then twice. you remember vic saying something about helping you with a job but you honestly just thought that was bullshit to get her to come stay with you.
(or get in your pants. but you don’t think you’d be too upset about that now.)
“ok. thank you, nancy. tell me the details.”
it’s a lot more extravagant than you expected. victorias friend, an actual senator, was holding a fundraising event for some government program he and vic were both involved in. nancy wasn’t told what the program was, but that you would have to go through a security debrief before being told you'd be given a team to help you prepare. and picking from a selected closet of dresses. fun.
you ignore the feeling of nervousness that’s building up in your gut. because while all of your gigs were important, they were never this important. you push it down as you call victoria and thank her endlessly, when you tell your friends the minimum amount that you can tell them, and when victoria picks you up from outside your hotel twelve hours before the event even starts.
she pressed a small kiss to your hand, laughing at the grumpy and tired mumble you let out when you sit in the car seat. it only passes once she gives you a coffee she picked up, the caffeine waking you up and putting a smile on your face.
the content feeling turns into shock when you enter victorias' place and see zoe, vic throwing a short explanation of “busy babysitter” over her shoulder as she heads into the kitchen.
its a bit awkward at first, sitting on one couch as she plays on a black nintendo switch on the other. it helps when you ask her about whatever she’s playing, the girl diving into a rant about the farm game she’s playing and how she’s trying to catch a certain type of fish.
victoria comes back with a tray of breakfast for the three of you before asking her daughter how school is going, how her friends are, etc. its nice to get a glimpse into victories private life during the morning, the close bond she has with her daughter. you notice some tension but decide not to bring it up.
the morning goes by too quickly, zoe being picked up to be dropped off at a friend's house after giving you a sweet goodbye and you getting rushed upstairs as the team comes to the townhome to help you prepare. its a nice change, having other people doll you up instead of having to worry about trying to do everything correctly and by yourself. and its a perk you don't have to spend your own money to do it.
the team members are nice but punctual, finishing your hair and makeup in record time with not a second wasted. you barely get time to notice yourself in the mirror before you're ushered into a gorgeous gown, soft fabrics and a chic and elegant style.
when your finished you’re finally allowed to observe yourself while your transportation and is prepared, and it feels like you’re looking at a dream version of yourself.
as you admire yourself in the mirror vic comes up next to you, clearly enjoying herself as her eyes slowly drift up and down your body.
“you look…ethereal.” she whispers, pressing a small kiss to your cheek after you turn to smile at her.
“only because of you. i don’t know how i could ever make this up to you, vic. this is just…”
“trust me, you’ve already done enough.”
while you knew there would be some press at the event, you didn't expect over two dozen paparazzi to quickly start flashing their cameras in your direction as soon as you got out of your ride. questions about who you were wearing, the relationship you had with vic, etcetera etcetera. you would've buckled from the sudden pressure if it weren't for victoria’s steady hand on your waist, the press of her arm through her red pantsuit.
the venue is downright insane, so grand you start to wonder if you're in one of those gilded age mansions you used to read about in new york magazines. climbing pillars and art on the ceiling of the main hall, which you don't get to admire since you’re yet again whisked away to get ready.
after a few more touch ups you aren’t afforded a minute to prepare, guided to the edge of the performance area. the sinking feeling is back in your stomach. the biggest moment of your life and you feel like you’re going to be sick.
the lights dim and you glide onto the stage, able to see the shadows of the guests faces from the flickering table lights. it’s eerie, the amount of them staring up at you with eyes you can’t even see.
you were given a set list a few days prior, only a couple of songs for the payment you would apparently receive after this. the songs piqued your interest, a collection of classical melancholic pieces from around the fifties. vic told you her friend was a vintage nut, but you didn't know why he chose these for you to perform when the event seemed to have an uplifting aura.
either way it felt…different, singing this time. the spotlight was on you and you’ve never felt as beautiful as you did in this moment. everyone was watching you, so hooked on the melodies escaping your body that you could see the emotions brining some people to the edge of their seats.
you don’t let it show but you grow a bit anxious at the sight of supers in their uniforms in the crowd. you don’t see anyone from the seven, but you do notice a woman you recognized from some commercial about climate change and earth preservation, the green of her dress and the nature motifs in her outfit give you a clue as to what her power was.
just when you feel yourself about to slip, dangerously close to hitting a note at a weird pitch, you see victoria, getting deja vu at the sight of her staring at you from the bar like the first night you met. she's looking at you like she's never doubted you for a second, like you're an angel sent from above that's blessed her life.
you hold her gaze when you sing. noticing the soft smile on her face when you sing a lyric about how the feelings in your heart feel so intense you fear you're going insane.
when the first song ends the lights come back on and you're met with a polite yet thunderous applause, the smile on your face so wide your cheeks start to hurt. the presenter comes back on stage, praising your performance with a swipe at his eyes before telling the guests that the host would be on shortly, and after he gives a short speech you'd be back to sing some more. with a gentle nod and wave, you step off the stage.
you feel like you're walking on air, with no doubt that was one of your best performances yet. your emotions got a little intense there but nothing you couldn't manage, and everyone seemed to like it anyway.
you're able to send a quick text and a picture to jamie and chloe before you hear the sound of the door to your quaint dressing room open, not able to turn around before you feel hands around your waist and plush lips on the side of your neck, the sight of victoria wrapped around you in the mirror making butterflies swarm in your stomach.
"i take it you liked my singing?"
"like doesn't even begin to cover it," she mumbles into your neck, raising her head slightly to be able to hold eye contact through the mirror. "i'm so lucky i found you, y'know that?"
you playfully brush her off, telling her you have to freshen up for some mingling before you get back on stage. she gladly helps you with your makeup, and while you weren't expecting her to be so touchy tonight you definitely aren't complaining, especially when her hand starts to drift closer to the space between your legs. it takes an embarrassing amount of mental strength to deny her, promising you'll continue once you go back to her place.
once you're finished getting ready she leads you back out to the hall, introducing you to numerous business people, politicians, celebrities, etc. you try not to fangirl when you meet a singer whose songs you've been obsessed with lately and when she asks you to perform at her cousins wedding. victoria just smirks when she leads you away and you let out a tiny squeal under your breath.
once the networking is done you're able to take the time to sit down and eat some of the catered food, almost moaning at the tastes of the food. you sometimes forget just how good food could be in the states, and these rich people pulled out all the stops. you try not to eat too quickly or impolitely as victoria talks with her tablemates, some people from her job apparently. after the first introductions and praises they gave you you mentally tapped out of the situation. she luckily covers for you when they question your mood, laughing when she tells them you've had a long day of being treated like a singing barbie doll.
everyone in the room quiets down when the hos taakes the stage and starts his speech. he introduces himself as robert stendham, and you feel a little embarrassed that this man gave you the chance to sing here and you didn't even know his name. you're thinking about how odd it is that you weren't introduced before this when he mentions something about the program and you perk up.
"...extend a personal thank you to general jameson for finding the time to escape his duties to fly in and be here with us tonight, and a special thanks to director neuman for helping me with this project and finding the beautifully talented y/n to perform for us tonight."
there was a brief few seconds of applause, victoria looking around and giving out smiles while you wondered what the hell she was the director of.
"as you can see, we have a few supers with us tonight. people like hazelwood, whose efforts against climate change have lead to over a dozen organizations plating millions of trees and clearing millions of pounds of trash for the ocean. because that's what supers are supposed to do-protect us. not act like degenerates who get to do what they want because of their abilities."
your eyebrow twitches, sensing the slight anti-supe propaganda from the end of his speech. well, not anti every supe, just the ones who act like gods among men, which you could understand. but you still felt an uneasy feeling rising in your stomach. you feel vic's palm rest over the top of your hand under the table.
"which is why im incredibly honored that director and congresswoman neuman has extended a hand to me to invest in the federal bureau of superhuman affairs, and to further extend that hand to you to help participate in this monumental institution..."
everything is a fog and your brain taps out once he starts talking about what this burerua does, how they closely monitor supes and jail the ones who've caused public harm. your head feels hot and your chest feels cold, and you can't stop your body from going on auto-pilot and excusing yourself to the bathroom before finding some balcony on the higher floor.
the cold air of new york shocks your body back into normalcy, but the pounding in your head persists. it feels like a panic attack ut so much worse, like your fight or flight has been activated without anything even happening. had you rushed into all of this? chasing a girl and a dream like you were a teenager again?
yet again the door opens behind you and someone comes to stand next to you, able to tell who it is by the scent of brown sugar and the glimpse of dark hair blowing with the slight breeze.
"you alright? mr. brandon from the tech startup was asking about you, tried to make me invest in some room light plant grower hybrid-"
"why did you bring me here?"
you cut her off and the air is quiet, save for the sounds of cars and the city and the wind. it's weird, standing in a tense silence like this with her.
"how are you feeling?" she whispers .
"are you- " you turn, nearly giving yourself whiplash with the speed at which you turn to look at her. the look on her face, like she's just observing you and how you're reacting. it only upsets you more. "are you being serious?"
"yes, i am. tell me."
"no, answer my question first. why are you avoiding it?"
she sighs, brushing a few strands of hair away from her face before reaching to grab your hand, which you hesitantly let her hold.
"as you heard, im part of a buereau that monitors supherhumans, keeping track of them, making sure they cant use their powers for harm. so far we've only had to deal with supes here in the states. until one day, this couple comes in that believe their daughter has used her powers on them."
she reaches for something in her pocket and your grip tightens. she pulls out a polaroid and holds the picture up for you to see. you feel like you're going to vomit when you see you, smiling, standing with your parents in a backyard.
"what...what is this? how'd you get this?"
"the couple gave me this picture, and told me how weird the least few years have been. friends and family asking where their daughter went, how she was doing, a daughter they didnt even remeber having."
you bring a hand up to your head, hopelessly trying to dissipate the splitting headache that's forming.
"but then they said the memories started coming back. glimpses of a child running in the grass, birthday parties, graduations, talent shows-"
"stop, please just stop." you gasp, hunching over as good as you can with the restrictions of your gown. it doesn't even feel like the world is just spinning, it feels like its being played in some celestial game of pool. "so what, you're saying...you're saying i did that? to my parents?"
"yes," she reaches for the side of your face, guiding you to look up at her. "and you can do so much more. you already have."
this can't be happening.
"why do you think people react so emotionally to your singing? you think its just because you're amazing? that's not even half of it."
your breathing is picking up again.
flashes of memories start appearing in your vision. so many happy times with your parents that you forgot, friends that you left behind. how your parents didn't support your half-thought-out plan to become a singer, how you made them forget. made yourself forget.
"i don't want you to think i did all of this just for what i want. i didn't. i care about you, and i want you to help me. but you need to trust me."
the blood is rushing back and from your head, and you think about how weird her eyes look against the backdrop of the city before you pass out.
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finally. FINALLY. ong i wrote like 1k in the past day because i said just get this shit over with but its done! 5 months later! hope you enjoyed :)
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