#so basically the three options are a) she's in her 40s like the actress is but this doesn't make sense with the timeline

[stairset]

I think it's funny how all these recent interviews about Bo-Katan are making her age an even bigger point of contention than it already was and so far Wookieepedia refuses to update her page, even they're like we ain't touching this shit with a 10 foot pole and I respect that.

[straightbaittournament]

only the option with the LEAST votes will be eliminated. propaganda under the cut (and more always welcome!):

kit tanthalos and graydon hastur:

Classic arranged marriage trope but the she-hates-him part never goes away because she’s in love with her best friend/bodyguard Jade

alexa, liana, jeremy, and ian:

the Only barbie animated movie where the girl(s) do not end up with a guy. alexa & liana live together and enact a ton of romantic tropes together, the twin guys do flirt with them but then the girls are separated from them by... a magic rainbow. they do dance together at the end of the movie... before the girls leave to go live together again. wearing dresses that are literally the bi and lesbian pride flags. no joke. cottagecore wlw separated from potential male love interests by literal magic rainbow the gayest barbie movie

tobias funke and debrie bardeux:

Debrie starred in a series of softcore gay porn films called Straightbait where she seduces a guy but tells him he has to sleep with another man before he sleeps with her to prove how attracted to her he is, thus proving he isn’t gay. Tobias is also super gay. They date for like 40 episodes and raise a son together. Tobias gets left by his first wife for not being sexually attracted to her and then has an affair with a gay porn actress from a series called straightbait I just think it’s pretty funny.

haruhi fujioka and hikaru hitachiin:

Haruhi x Hikaru from ouran high school host club. Yes i know she technically gets together with another boy in the end, but there is something so Queer about this ship in particular. Their whole date episode is just screaming Not Straight. For both of them.

ash ketchum and misty:

They’re basically set up as a kind of enemies to friends story and they make recurring jokes about how she clearly has a big crush on him, but nothing ever happens My childhood, i shipped them when I was 10

cali and flynn:

It starts off as a one-sided crush on Flynn’s side, and later becomes mutual when Cali develops feelings for him in the Skylanders IDW spin-off comics, their romantic tension lasts for most of the franchise (five games, a chapter of a spin-off comic, and a few bits and pieces in the spin-off books and mobile games), so far they’ve never gotten together as the franchise is currently still in hiatus mode (says this while on extreme copium) I think we need to appreciate the tropes in Calynn: Opposites Attract, Tough Girl x Himbo, Smart x Dumb, “You’re stupid, I like that in a man” vibes all over this ship! Seven year old me didn’t see Cali calling Flynn her guy in the sky whilst Flynn looked at her with heart eyes to lose to some other pairing!

alec hardy and ellie miller:

They're your classic workplace enemies to lovers. Alec takes the job that Ellie was meant for, they're forced to work together on a devastating murder case, they bond. Over three series Alec becomes more human and lets his walls down around Ellie, and she begins to respect and trust him as a colleague and as a friend. Its a Big Deal when they hug. In most cases, especially when it's an m/f detective duo, they would end up together. But yet. Thee David Tennant and Olivia Coleman did not even have an aborted kiss or feelings confession. Neither of them end up with anyone else but they don't hint at anything at the end either. Queer Ally of all time David Tennant does straightbait ironically.

good luck everyone! now go vote!

[seblaine-rph]

While you're looking into rps can we talk about Devereux Academy for a minute? A basic look at their main and rules reveals Kristin Stewart as an FC but she's asked repeatedly not to be used in rp, people getting originally tested for being Dom Switch or sub at 17, the rp wording is almost an exact replica of another rp that ran for a while, and they are allowing the Motta family to be whitewashed with a white Robert Pattinson FC. I'm sure theres more i was just too disgusted to keep looking.

This isn’t the first time I’ve been told to take a look at @devereuxacademy or heard about it being problematic. I can’t tell you about the dash and I’m not going to troll through everyone’s blogs, so if there is something on the dash that anyone would like to share with me (problematic plots, not tagging triggers, admin behavior,etc) then feel free to send another ask. 

More than one person came to me when this rp first hit the tags, asking if I thought they had stolen parts of their rp. I reported this by answering multiple different asks about it and they never responded, which is very telling. Honestly, I think they did. Intentionally or not, they do have a lot of parts of other, existing roleplays in their plot and there are so many copy and pasted things that it looks to be done on purpose. You can say, “but it’s a D/s academy rp and there’s only so many ways to rp in a school, so of course it looks similar to other rps of the same genre” except for the part where even academy rps have their own unique plot points, including the history of the world, social economics, and the school as well as the history of the administration. And that wasn’t the last time it was brought to my attention, or the only reason. I do see it, if we’re looking for my opinion on the matter of stolen plot content. I can see at least three different roleplays that were already in the tags for a long time, weaved together to make this group. I don’t really see anything that is original in the plot or worldview info, aside from maybe the intense details on IVF as the reason for there being so many triplets. Don’t quote me on that, though, it may have been used before. I just haven’t seen it. 

It weirds me out that they have all of their characters being thrust into nsfw situations before 18, with what should be an 18+ concept like BDSM, and at the same time they’re a discord rp as well as a tumblr rp. It says on their application that the characters are tested to find out which mark they are at 17. That’s a minor, being tested in a nsfw way because however you slice it BDSM and D/s are nsfw and nobody under the age of 18 can legally or morally be allowed to even dip a single toe in and that includes taking a test to find out what kinks they like and whether they’re going to want to be catching or receiving when it comes to sex. It just makes me wonder what’s being hidden in the discord. I’d also like to mention that they do have the option to play teachers as well as students, which is just weird and gross to me in this instance. The content is nsfw, clearly some students are going to get with teachers. It’s weird enough when it’s a sfw college rp and students do not smut with teachers, but being a teacher is a respectable character choice so I can see why you’d want to do it. If you were going to focus on talking to other teachers and developing plots with other teachers. In this instance though... the power dynamic between teachers and students are way different and there is a sexual overtone automatically because this is a kinky smut rp. You can also play a character as young as 21, which just makes me hope there are no relationships being written out by naive 21 year olds with their 30-40-50+, way more mature, could be their parent teacher. That might sound like I’m making up something that would never happen, but I have seen someone try to play a 62 year old lesbian that was predatory towards 19 year olds and even claimed one in a D/s rp like this. We all know how Glee rps work, we all know this line has already been crossed. We all also know why that’s gross- it’s an abuse of power and there is no way that a teacher/student dynamic could be cute because there will always be a sense of one person being way more mature than the other and being in a seat of power. Another reason to wonder what’s being hidden on this discord.

There are incorrectly casted families. In particular, I’m seeing POC families with fcs that should not belong because they do not match. I’d really like to know how it is that two Filipino girls and a black girl are twins. As a general note to the admins, you can’t erase half of someone’s ethnicity either. There are other families where one or more character is half right but also half wrong in an offensive way. And some families that are just wrong. I do give them props on some of this being right, but that doesn’t erase the other problems. You can’t whitewash people. Not all Asians are the same. Not all Latinx people are the same. Brown people aren’t interchangeable. Let me just list these so they’re easier to fix:

In the Adams family, Alex Newell is African-American but the fc has a sister that’s  British, Polish and Caribbean. That might be picking at straws but I always find it offensive when people pick and choose how to group ethnicities- like deciding all Asians are the same so they can be related. Either way, she’s over half white which doesn’t match up. 

Laura Harrier is Rachel Berry, she is half black and half white with Jewish background so that’s a really nice choice but then she’s twins with two Haliee Steinfeld fcs? Hailee who is Filipino... She’s also been accused of using the N word and being racist so she’s on a lot of people’s banned lists for the same reasons as Lea Michele. 

Brianna Tju is in a Chinese family but she’s half Indonesian. She’s also a Disney Channel star, so some people find that problematic from the start, because most of her resources are from kid’s shows at an age that is too young to be roleplaying. She’s only 22 now, which is old enough to rp, however the only real resources she has are from something that aired in 2015 and was likely filmed in 2014 or earlier. When she was definitely a minor. 

Kaya Scoldelario is Brazilian. She’s whitewashed by being placed in the Clarington family.

Zoe Deutch is Jewish. Her siblings are Matthew Daddario (Slovak, Italian, Irish, Hungarian, and English) and Haley Lu Richardson, who has a white background that doesn’t include Jewish. This is the Corcoran family as well, which should be Jewish, since they’re all related to Idina Menzel.

Victoria Pedretti is Jewish and she’s in the very white Evans family.

None of the older Fabrays are Jewish, and Ashley Johnson is Native American but also somehow a twin of the white Frannie Fabray.

Principal Figgins is played by someone that is Pakistani but the Figgins on the masterlist is played by Dev Patel, who is Gujarati Indian. 

Tyler Hoechlin is also partially Native American, but he is placed in the Flangan (Irish, like straight out of Ireland) family that has Rory recast as Thomas Dogherty (Scottish) with an Ariana Grande (Italian) twin as well. 

Kristen Stewart is on the masterlist but she has asked numerous times not to be used in roleplay because it makes her uncomfortable. I just covered this for another roleplay, and I’ve seen other people mention it, so it’s common knowledge at this point. She has been saying this for a long time. She’s also placed as the twin of Danielle Campbell, who is Mexican and Cajun French while Kristen is just white and the canon family member (Gilbert, so Adam Lambert) is Jewish.

Zendaya is also placed as a twin to Samantha Ware. Zendaya is mixed race, half black and half white, while Samantha is black. 

Yvette Monreal is the twin to Demi Lovato. Yvette is Chilean. Demi is Mexican and Portuguese. 

Avan Jogia is a Hart, but he is Gujarati Indian and white. He would be a better family relation to Dev Patel than anyone else on the masterlist and vice versa. As a refresher, Samuel Larsen (the canon fc for the Hart family) is Mexican, Danish, Spanish and Persian.

Maddison Jaizani is Iranian, but she’s listed as a Holliday which makes her related to Gwyneth Paltrow... a blonde, white woman.

Jacob Elordia is Basque and his sibling on the masterlist is Marie Avgeropoulos, a Greek actress. 

Rafael Silva is Brazilian, but he is a Lopez triplet, related to a Mexican-Irish sister (Lindsay Morgan) and a Mexican-Jewish sister (Alexa Demie).

Sugar Motta is played by Vanessa Lengies on Glee, an Egyptian actress. Her family is whitewashed with two white fcs, Kelli Berglung and Robert Pattinson. 

Kaylee Byrant is Japanese but she is twin to Madison Beer (Jewish) and Daisy Ridley (white).

The Puckerman family has lost its Jewish heritage. The only two on Noah’s side are Adelaide Kane (white) and Luke Pasqualino (Italian). Jake Puckerman has been recast as Justice Smith, who is half black and half white but is not Jewish. His sister is Samantha Logan who is half Trinidadian and half white and Pauline Singer, who is full Fijian.

Antonia Gentry is cast as a Weston. She is Jamaican, her listed twin is half white and half African-American. The newest acceptance for a Weston is for an African American fc. 

Lili Reinhart is on the masterlist, but she’s problematic. She’s defended the abusive behavior of her cast mate, Cole Sprouse, who was very publicly accused of sexual assault and abuse. She’s also been accused of blackface annnnnnnd she’s used queer baiting to get people to watch the show. (She teased a girl on girl relationship publicly, telling people to watch the show because they might finally get to see something between Betty and Veronica, knowing that the fans wanted it, but then when she was asked about it in a later interview she scoffed and acted like it was absolutely impossible and would never happen, some would say she even sounded offended by the thought-- which is what everyone got mad at Melissa Benoist for doing with Supergirl.)

David Corenswet is Jewish, cast with Emily Browning as a sister, who is not.

I applaud the Brazilian change for Lauren Zizes, but Ashley Fink was a welcome representation of plus size actresses and the new fc is less than half her size. She’s still plus size technically, but she’s “model plus size,” which is not at all the same as Lauren’s body type. I ran this by someone that this change would affect and they were not pleased. They were the one that pointed this out to me, because it bothered them as a plus size person to see one of the few plus size characters recasted with a skinnier fc. 

Dove Cameron is also on the masterlist, but she’s on a bunch of people’s banned lists. She replied to a fan that said they wanted her to notice them that they were stupid and had no life if that was one of their goals. She’s been rude to cast and crew on set. Dove has also been accused of throwing a fit and making the writers change the Descendants script to take the relationship that was written out for a black actress. She’s being accused of yellow fishing, which I believe is the term for trying to look Asian. She wore a Native American headdress in a cultural appropriation type of way. She’s been accused of being fatphobic and hiding behind photoshop on her social media while saying she doesn’t photoshop, so she’s giving off a false sense of reality to her fans. She’s been talking badly about someone that is trying to get their sexual assault story out there. The latest thing that’s come out about her is a rant about how mental health isn’t real and that people just need to logic their way out of depression? Which would be coming from a seat of high privilege. She wrote a series of tweets on the topic, calling negative mental health and the feelings they cause “a choice.” There’s a whole hashtag on Tumblr for her. 

I’m not at all surprised to see that all of the diverse characters are open. No Artie, no Unique- who could definitely be recast as an actual trans woman, now that we’re living in the age of recasting for reasons of problematic natures- if we can have a new Puck, new Finn, new Rachel, and new Santana why not an appropriate Unique? She is literally the only canon trans woman, why not treat her with respect? They recasted Cooper to better fit the proper ethnicity, so... 

[alicedoessurveys]

Doctor Who Tag

yes im a nerd...

CHILDHOOD

1. Did you like DW as a child?

I was 10 when it came back on telly with Eccleston and the first episode with the autons scared me so much my mom wouldn't let me watch it again until a couple years later, but yeah my teens I was obsessed with DW... still am at age 25

2. Your age at the time of the revival?

10

3. First DW episode you ever saw?

‘Rose’

4. Did you have any of the toys?

I still have the eleventh doctor’s screwdriver... I used to have some of the figures but there in storage now somewhere

5. Which DW character did you play on the playground?

didn't play it on the playground

6. Monster(s) that scared you most as a child?

all of them! the ones that still scare me now are the Cybermen and the Autons... genuinely cant walk past a shop mannequin without being suspicious 

7. Joke/story you didn’t get as a kid?

as a kid, any of the innuendo type jokes

8. DW opinion that has changed since you were a kid?

idk I think I still have the same opinions

9. Who introduced you to DW?

parents

10. Did you like Sarah Jane Adventures as a child?

I LOVED SJA!! I miss that show, and Elizabeth Slade :(

DOCTOR

11. Who is your Doctor?

Ten was the doctor that made me fall in love with Doctor Who 

12. Your favourite Doctor?

omg why not just ask me who my favourite child is... (I don't have kids but you know what I mean) if I had to chose my top three are ten, eleven and thirteen

13. Least favourite Doctor?

purely just because he doesn't have enough episodes... nine...

14. Best regeneration?

none of them I hate regenerations :( they make me sad, im too emotionally invested in every single one

15. Do you like “Doctor-Lite” episodes?

they're not my faves

16. Who is the most human Doctor?

I think nine maybe? or twelve?

17. Best multi-Doctor story?

the 50th anniversary special 

18. Best Doctor monologue?

“Hello Stonehenge! who takes the pandorica, takes the universe. but bad news everyone, cause guess who? HA! You lot you're all whizzing about- its really very distracting. Could you all just stay still a minute because I AM TALKING. Question of the hour is, who's got the pandorica? Answer, I do. Next question, who's coming to take it from me? Come on, look at me! No plan. No backup. No weapons worth a damn. oh and something else, I don't have anything to lose. So, if you're sitting up there in your silly little spaceship with all your silly little guns and you've got any plans on taking the pandorica tonight... just remember who's standing in your way. remember ever black day I ever stopped you and then- AND THEN- do the smart thing... let somebody else try first.”

not copied and pasted, remember that from the top of my head... its always there waiting in my mind incase I ever need an epic monologue :’)

19, What do you think TenToo/MetaCrisis Doctor is doing now?

hopefully living his best life with Rose

20. Best Doctor/companion pairing?

ten and donna 

COMPANIONS

21. Favourite companion?

Donna, Clara, Amy

22. Favourite secondary companion?

is Mickey classed as secondary? idk

23. Least favourite companion?

Ryan

24. Best TARDIS Team?

Doctor, Amy and Rory

25. Most underrated companion?

Graham, but that may just be cause I love Bradders

26. Most overrated companion?

Rose... I like her but idk, I think she gets more hype than she deserves.. don't @ me

27. Favourite companion’s family?

Rose’s mom

28. Who should have been a companion but wasn’t?

idk I cant think of anyone

29. Favourite (canon or non-canon) DW universe relationship?

Amy and Rory

30. Who did you not used to like, but really like now?

wasn't keen on Bill at first but by the end I really liked her, same with Rory

EPISODES

31. Favourite episode ever?

girl in the fireplace

32. Least favourite episode?

most of Chibnall’s episodes tbh sorry not sorry 

33. Which episodes do you skip?

the regeneration episodes

34. Best two-parter?

Human Nature - Family of Blood

35. Historical, present day or futuristic episodes?

I like them all in there own way but I think present is fave, then historical, then future

36. Episode that will always make you smile?

all of them

37. Episode that will always make you cry?

Rory and Amy’s last episode :’(

38. Best run of episodes?

ugh I cant answer this theres too many 

39. Best cliffhanger?

the end of Spyfall part one when the Master reveals who he is... I was SHOOK

40. Favourite Christmas special?

Voyage of the Damned

SERIES

41. Classic Who or New Who?

new who

42. Favourite series?

four or five

43. Least favourite series?

eleven, I just cant with the writing

44. Which series do you skip?

none

45. Favourite series opening?

eleventh hour

46. Favourite series finale?

Doomsday

47. Best series arc?

Bad Wolf

48. Thoughts on series 11/12?

I adore Jodie Whittaker and her doctor, and although I think 3 companions is too many I do love Yaz and Graham (Ryan is hit & miss). I just think theyve been massively let down by the stories/writing... they’ve tried to hard to tick certain boxes and completely missed what Doctor Who is about for a lot of people.. an escape from the real world into these outrageous unbelievable but lovable fun alien adventures 

49. How much of Classic Who have you seen?

not a lot

50. Who should have had another series?

NINE NINE NINE NINE NINE 

MONSTERS

51. Favourite monster/villain?

the master 

52. Most creative monster?

Weeping Angels, whoever came up with monsters that look like statues and only move when you're not looking at them is genius 

53. Monster(s) that scares you most?

Autons, Cybermen, the creepy dolls from Night Terrors, the ones from Waters of Mars, Weeping Angels

54. Monster you think is too easy to defeat?

idk

55. Least favourite monster/villain?

absorbaloff

56. Monster you want to return?

The Master, I really hope that isn't the last we see of Dhawan

57. In your opinion, what makes a monster good?

being genuinely scary, 

58. Daleks, Cybermen or Weeping Angels?

Weeping Angels

59. Best Dalek story?

Daleks in Manhatten

60. Best one time villain/monster?

my brain has gone blank I cant think of an answer right now 

ADDITIONAL MATERIAL

61. Torchwood or Sarah Jane Adventures?

SJA

62. Favourite Torchwood Team member?

I haven't watched it all so I couldn't say 

63. Which Torchwood death made you saddest?

again, not watched it all 

64. Do you rewatch COE or MD?

huh

65. Favourite SJA Team member?

Sarah Jane

66. Mr Smith or K-9?

K-9

67. Maria or Rani?

Rani

68. Do you read the comics/novels or listen to Big Finish?

Nope

69. If you do, your favourite additional stories?

n/a

70. Do you like DW analysis (video essays, fan theories, etc)?

yes

DESIGN/PRODUCTION

71. Favourite piece of alien tech?

the sonic, I love how it is so multipurpose except for when it comes to wood 

72. Favourite piece of Murray Gold music?

I am the Doctor - gets me pumped every time 

73. Favourite TARDIS design?

Ten’s Tardis 

74. Has the 2005 era CGI aged well?

actually yeah, I was rewatching the ‘are you my mummy’ episodes the other day and my God when the gas masks emerged from the faces... ooooooof I was like omg how 

75. Favourite Doctor outfit?

eleven or thirteen

76. Monster with the best design?

not really a design more of a costume.. I live Dhawan master’s costume. that shade of purple, oof he so stylish 

77. Best show runner?

idk

78. Best writer?

Gatiss

79. Best opening titles?

eleven’s titles where the Tardis is flying and being zapped is cool but thirteens music hits different 

80. Will DW age well/stay popular in the future?

I hope so, I feel like its lasted this long surely it can last forever.. if the writers don't fuck it up... 

IF YOU WERE IN THE SHOW

81. Time period you’d want to go with the Doctor?

whatever time means Id get to wear the most beautiful costumes

82. Planet/place you’d want to go with the Doctor?

Galifrey, pre-desctruction

83. Doctor you’d most like to travel with?

any of them, please and thank you

84. Companion you’d most like to travel with?

donna, sceso a good laugh but also I feel like she’d look after me 

85. Monster you’d like to defeat/fight?

The Master 

86. If you could go back on your own history (like Father’s Day), where would you go?

back to when I was a toddler, I wanna see what I was like 

87. If you could ask the Doctor anything, what would you ask?

theres too many to ask 

88. Historical figure you’d like to meet?

Shakespeare

89. How do you think you’d meet the Doctor?

id probably be rescued from doing something stupid and then the doc would be like you know what the bitch clearly needs supervision she's coming with me 

90. Would you travel forwards or backwards in time first?

backwards

IF YOU MADE THE SHOW

91. Historical event would you like to see in DW?

Hamilton

92. Issue you’d like to see addressed in DW?

idk 

93. Who would you completely erase from the DW universe?

Ruth

94. One unanswered DW question you’d love to know the answer to?

where is Clara now?

95. Actor/actress you’d like to see play the Doctor?

Phoebe Waller Bridge (or Lin Manuel Miranda)

96. Actor/actress you’d like to see play a companion?

Andrew Scott (yes I did just basically recast fleabag and hot priest)

97. Is DW “too political”?

series 11 got a bit like that 

98. Which characters fate would you changed?

Danny Pink

99. What about DW could be improved?

I think ive made my options about Chibnall pretty clear... 

100. If you could write an episode of DW, any ideas for what you’d do

bring back Jenny, the Doctor / Daughter adventures they would have. I’m actually writing a fic about it if you wanna read.... here

[theareya]

even numbers for the gaming asks!

Okay, its been 1000 years since I posted this gaming ask. But here are the answers!!!! I put most under the read more…

2. First game you played?The first game I ever played ever, in thehistory of forever, was Super Mario Bros. at my babysitter’s house, if mymemory serves me correctly

4. Longest consecutive hours you’ve played agame?Ohkay, let’s see. Without eating or bathing,but I did get up briefly to bathroom and drink water, I finished uncharted 1,2, and 3 consecutively in 120 hrs. Needless to say, I never did that again, asthe blood vessels in my eyes popped, I ate two bigmacs after, and my parentsyelled at me. Otherwise, without moving or tending to most of my basic bodilyneeds, 10 hours max as of late.

6. An underrated game from within the last fewyears?I don’t know, I’m probably biased and neverreally look online to see how the game was rated/how it’s doing. Oh! But! Ireally liked Battleborn, which was basically a game that came out like a littlebefore Overwatch? Or near the same time, actually. You also fight in teamsagainst one another with unique character abilities to obtain certainobjectives. Honestly, it is extremely well done and detailed, but very muchfalls in Overwatch’s shadow possibly due to similarity and budget D:  8. The game with the best atmosphere/scenery?I’m biased. I love Bioshock. But I also am ahuge fan of those apocalyptic, dystopia aesthetics. So, essentially, anythingalong the lines of bioshock, Fallout, and Last of us.

10. Prefer PC or console?I’ve always played on console. And I’m so bad atPC. You would think it’s a bit easier to aim a cursor to shoot at something,but I’m particularly bad at that.

12. Most bizarre game you’ve ever played?Most games are pretty… bizarre. Most of theactual weird ones I’ve only seen online on those “top ten weirdest video games”but maybe Katamari? There are definitely weirder ones… The Nightmare Within wasalso… strange. I don’t actually know what counts as bizarre anymore in thegaming world. Shrek party…

14. Do you watch playthroughs online?Sometimes, yes! If I know I am never going toget the game. For example, an xbox exclusive (I do not have an xbox) or if Ialready played the game and want to see others suffer, lmao. Or if I like thestreamer.

16. The best year in gaming you’ve experienced?… I don’t remember. I’m going to say 2011.

18. Worst game you’ve played?There are probably worse games, but I’ll go withthe most recent one I’ve played, which was Bound by Flame. It was kind of thisunfortunate mix of—attempt at—Dark Souls, Dragon Age, and other medieval games.Some parts of the gameplay were unnecessarily hard for kicks, with no way toovercome the boss aside from chipping away at the health by throwing a rock atit, while your single dead companion lay sprawled in the middle of the fieldten seconds into the fight. And of the one and a half romance options pergender you were allowed, none of them were very enticing. Spoiler** I overcamethe end fight by purchasing 10,000 potions to fight the dragon. I made itthrough just fine, only after using 600 potions. Strategy was little help, butheyo I made it through. 20. Favorite publisher and/or developer?…Sony? I don’t know… I’m terrible at thesequestions.

22. If you could turn one game into movie, whichwould it be?You know I don’t know, since any game thatturns into a movie makes me want to cry bitter tears of hate. I’m looking atresident evil specifically. But if I could turn Bioshock into a really goodmovie with the proper actors/actresses, storyline, extras, atmosphere, then …yeah.

24. Ever cried because of a video game? Whichone(s)?…Too many. Nothing gets me more invested andemotional than a videogame. I guess the only one that has made me actually cryvisible tears is Journey. The ending overwhelmed me in an inexplicable way.

26. How often do you play online? Co-op?Relatively often now, especially withOverwatch, and the fact that a lot of my friends have Overwatch as well. So,like, every other day, if not daily. Otherwise, I love co-oping with a friend mostlybecause the AI that they give to work with you tends to … suck butts. Lookingat Resident Evil… again.

28. Who got YOU into gaming?My babysitter. Haahaa. I used to hang out ather house all the time and I’d watch her play all sorts of games. She’s alsothe one who gifted me my purple game boy color :’D30. On average, how long does it take you in thecharacter creation screen?Could be up to an hour. But at least 30minutes. It depends on if I know what I want.

32. Do you cosplay?I do! But I’ve actually only cosplayed animethings. Most of the video game stuff I would like to cosplay is too hard and/orI wouldn’t do it justice. Also I’ve been parts of group cosplays generally, sowe gotta find a good match.

34. Favorite male npc?For some unknown reason, the only personpopping into my head right now is erandur, the dark elf companion, from skyrim.Like… he’s not my favorite npc, but…my mind is drawing a complete blank. And isjust repeating that name over and over in my head. Oh boy

36. Best antagonist?Albert Wesker. …Spoiler??** Look… if you gottathrow him in a volcano to get rid of him after 200 tries of “just survive longenough” fights, he’s pretty good to me. Please let him die.  

38. Have you tried a game, hated it, then triedagain, and loved it?N….no? There are some games where I getfrustrated, then invite a friend to play, who is extremely over-leveled, andthen they help me… live. Does that count?40. Favorite voice actor?Okay, I love Troy Baker. How can one person beso gosh darn versatile?? For anyone who doesn’t know (I doubt that) He voicesJoel from TLOU, Booker from Bioshock, Sam Drake from Uncharted, to name theones that pop into my head. And he does like a million other voices, and sings,and is just very excellent overall. 

42. A game you will never forget (in a bad ORgood way)?Resident Evil 5 in the respect that I justplayed it during a very happy time in my life with one of my friends. And itwas also when I learned that I really love co-op, as well it was a supertreasured bonding time with that friend. We legit screamed so obnoxiouslythroughout the whole thing, apologized profusely, yelled for help. Like thatgame brought out our full range of emotion while playing.

44. Do graphics matter?Not necessarily. They add a nice kick, butthere are quite a few games I can think of where the gameplay and story aremore prominent. Storyline is generally always the main thing I look for first.Storyline and characters. 46. Always, sometimes, or never use subtitles?ALWAYS. Even for NPCs. Like the setting thatsays “ALL SUBTITLES” one of the reasons is because it alerts me to enemiessometimes too as they whisper in the distance. Which is the closest thing to awarning from jump scares that I’m going to get.

48. A game you’ve always wanted to play but havenever gotten to it?Um. I’ve actually been pretty aggressive ingetting my grubby hands on the games that I want. EXCEPT. Nearly everythingthat came out after Kingdom Hearts: Chain of memories?? Like 2.3, 2.4, 2.5, 5 ½,365/3 days  idk there were too many?? AndI basically had almost every console except the PSP so I just kind of gave up??

50. How many games do you own?…uh… too many?? At least 200 if you total allof them from the dawn of my first game boy color.52. A game you will always stand behind, andsupport no matter what?..Fable. OKAY So, even though the game, alongwith the game company crashed and burned, I really loved that first game??Along with The Lost Chapters. I essentially based the experiences I had withFable 2, 3, Journey on how good the first game was. If I were to make someoneplay it now, they would probably think it’s pretty dumb, but I thought it was acleverly made game…54. A sequel you really want?… lmao Fable. AND/OR The Wolf Among us, becausethat’s been sitting there for far too long.56. Do you tell people irl that you play videogames?Yeah. If it comes up in the conversation. Or if…they have merchandise that I want.

58. Ever have someone walk in on a sex scenebetween you and you LI?N…o…60. The game you are best at?I know Bioshock inside and out… I don’t knowwhy I’ve played it so much, it’s a very linear game, but wuh. Also weirdly, I’mvery good at Sonic Adventure 2 Battle. And the only reason I’m obnoxiously goodat that game is because of the Chaos. I love those ridiculous little things andwould do anything to make sure they’re happy and healthy. And in order to dothat I had to play each stage multiple times to get the right power-ups andanimals to feed the Chaos…. There was a whole garden. And god.

62. Would you want to work with video games whenyou are older?I feel like if I start working with it I’llstart disliking it very much, unless I literally work as a tester… that getspaid a decent amount. Like seriously, walk in, sit down, play for… hours uponhours. Otherwise, I do not have the creativity or skill. lmao.

64. Describe your favorite video game using onlythree words?Underwater death city.

66. Game with the yummiest looking food?Final Fantasy XV. Okay, so I haven’t finishedthe game. I’m really not even that far into it, like… at all. I just saw thefood and got hungry. It’s so realistic and pretty.  

68. An older game that you’ve just recentlygotten into?I guess… Fallout New Vegas was pretty old, butthen my friend bought it for me on sale, and I tried it out and it was supergood??? And now I’m really into the Fallout series.

70. Do you play any mobile games?I.. play Fire Emblem Heroes, and a variety ofother mobile games like.. Notice me Senpai, Zen Koi, Mystic Messenger, uhhh…whatever is recommended sometimes. .

72. Have any guilty pleasure games?Not really. I’m pretty prideful in every game Iplay, including my otome games.74. Which game has the best lore?…Once…. Again, BIOSHOCK. Idk there are just somany little things in the city that you can find that point to the history ofthe residents, and what happened to them. There are those audio messages and littlesecrets that everybody has in the city, leading to its fall. I just love it somuch. Skyrim is a close second, to be fair. It’s more immersive and I canroleplay more on there.

[takenews-blog1]

Feminine Celebrities You Didn’t Understand Had been Tall

New Post has been published on https://takenews.net/feminine-celebrities-you-didnt-understand-had-been-tall/

Feminine Celebrities You Didn’t Understand Had been Tall

With regards to actresses and feminine celebrities, it’s straightforward to imagine their peak… particularly simply primarily based on what reveals and movies you’ve seen them in. When watching our favourite stars carry out in televisions sequence and flicks, it’s onerous to inform precisely how tall they’re, since there’s one thing about being on display that basically makes them appear smaller. However should you ever met these girls in individual, you’d most likely be completely shocked to seek out out their actual peak. Take a look at this record of feminine celebrities you may not have identified are literally actually tall.

(Photograph by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Photos for DGA)

No, Jane Lynch’s peak as Coach Sue Sylvester in Glee wasn’t simply because she was highly effective and even just a little scary at McKinley Excessive; she’s really very tall in actual life. And in line with the actress herself, it’s one thing most individuals don’t notice about her till they’ve had the prospect to satisfy her in individual. “I don’t have actual lengthy arms or legs. It’s not till I get up that folks go, ‘Oh, my God. You’re tall!’” Jane instructed Extra in an interview. “I assume I wasn’t creepy tall. Quite a lot of it needed to do with the way in which I introduced myself.” Um, nothing about Jane is creepy in any respect, in order that makes whole sense.

(Photograph by Kevin Tachman/Getty Photos for amfAR)

At 5’10”, Charlize Theron has undoubtedly towered over her male costars greater than as soon as. She’s been open about the truth that being tall hasn’t all the time helped her get the roles she’s most concerned about taking up in her profession. “Jobs with actual gravitas go to folks which are bodily proper for them and that’s the tip of the story,” she mentioned in a controversial interview with GQ in 2016. “What number of roles are on the market for the attractive, [expletive], gown-wearing, eight-foot mannequin? When meaty roles come by way of, I’ve been within the room and fairly folks get turned away first.”

If you watch Mandy Moore on This Is Us, you’re most likely means too busy sobbing to understand how tall she is… however in actuality, at 5’10”, she’s really an inch taller than her late onscreen husband, performed by Milo Ventimiglia. Despite the fact that she wasn’t all the time loopy about how tall she is, she’s mentioned that her mother is the one who helped her notice that being tall was factor. “She jogged my memory to embrace what I used to be given and stand tall with my shoulders again,” Mandy mentioned her mother would inform her when she wished she was shorter. “I assume the grass is all the time greener.”

(Photograph by Dan MacMedan/Getty Photos)

You most likely final noticed her in the latest Star Wars installment as Holdo, and perhaps you even seen that there, she stood tall, however Laura Dern is definitely very tall in actual life. At 5’10”, she tends to command the eye of any room she walks into, however let’s be actual: she’s Laura Dern. She’s a legend. Even when she was quick, that may occur! She hasn’t addressed her peak very a lot publicly, but it surely ought to undoubtedly be one thing she’s happy with. In spite of everything, who doesn’t wish to develop as much as be Laura? We want her to star in, like, each film from now till the tip of time.

(Photograph by Juan Naharro Gimenez/WireImage)

Identical to Jane Lynch (and plenty of different ladies on this record), Sigourney Weaver is six toes tall, and he or she’s admitted that being tall can take quite a lot of braveness… and quite a lot of reminding your self to not examine your self to those that are smaller. “Being tall has a significant impression normally,” Sigourney has mentioned previously. “It takes some braveness to be as huge as you’re – to stay as much as it and never be intimidated by the swish tiny folks.” We’d say that Sigourney has undoubtedly discovered a option to stay as much as being six toes tall, even when many individuals don’t discover her peak straight away after they watch her in her films.

Standing at 5’11”, Nicole is available in one inch taller than her nation singing husband, Keith City, however that doesn’t appear to trouble her… although it might need when she was youthful. When speaking to The Solar in 2011, Nicole revealed that in class, the opposite children known as her Storky due to her peak and for the reason that boys have been a lot shorter than she was, they have been among the many cruelest. “I want I had identified I’d develop into extra assured about my seems to be,” Nicole mentioned, including that she was already 5’10’ at 13 years previous. “It made me very self-conscious. I had no common boyfriend and no severe relationship till a lot later.”

At 6’three″, Gwendolyn Christie is made for the roles that made her well-known in Sport of Thrones and Star Wars. And apart from the roles she’s gotten due to her peak, Gwendolyn has additionally discovered a number of totally different advantages that include being tall. “You may get to the bar simpler,” she instructed Harper’s Bazaar. “You may catch the bar individual’s eye, and mouth what you need, and by the point you’re there, you’ve acquired it. I’m like a human plow. I even have a selfie-stick arm. To get the identical angle as I get with my selfie arm, you’d want a crane.”

(Photograph by Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Photos)

Julia Roberts is 5’9, and also you’ll discover that there isn’t a lot of a peak distinction between her and the vast majority of her male costars. Up to now, she’s mentioned that she’s “too tall to be a lady,” stating that as an alternative, she’s someplace “between a chick and a broad.” She additionally mentioned in an interview that folks first seen her peak after Mystic Pizza, after they couldn’t assist however make feedback about it. “Daily for per week after Mystic Pizza got here out, folks got here as much as me and mentioned, ‘I believed you have been six toes tall,’” Julia mentioned. “To me, I’m common peak. I’m five-foot-nine.”

You could not have guessed that this Grammy-winning singer has towered over most of her boyfriend, but it surely’s true — Taylor is a stable 5’10”, which is why she wore cowboy boots so usually at first of her profession. When she was youthful, Taylor was fairly self-conscious about her peak, and in her music, “Start Once more,” she even sang about an ex-boyfriend who didn’t like when she wore excessive heels as a result of it made her taller than him. Today, although? It looks like she’s actually embraced what makes her totally different, and you may catch that lady in heels anytime.

As a result of your entire Kardashian household is so small, you would possibly assume that Khloe doesn’t have a lot peak to her, both — however that’s undoubtedly not the reality. Though Kim and Kourtney are on the low finish of 5 toes tall, Khloe is definitely 5’10”, and being totally different from the remainder of her household is one thing it appears she’s come to like. “I don’t like after I can’t put on excessive heels in shoots as a result of my sisters are quick,” she’s admitted previously. “I’m tall, I really like excessive heels and I embrace it!” She ought to embrace it, as a result of with legs like hers, it’d be a disgrace if she missed out on heels!

Six-foot-tall Tilda Swinton is understood for her androgynous look — one thing her peak helps her accomplish. She even instructed a narrative throughout an interview with The New York Instances about how her peak usually causes her to be mistaken for a person. “The opposite day, I used to be going by way of the airport safety and I used to be searched by a male safety guard.” she mentioned. “I’m very sometimes called ‘Sir’ in elevators and such. I believe it has to do with being this tall and never sporting a lot lipstick. I believe folks simply can’t think about I’d be a lady if I appear to be this.”

Being that her husband, Ryan Reynolds, is 6’2″, it’s onerous to consider that Blake Vigorous is definitely extremely tall… however in actuality, she’s 5’11”. Sadly, although, it doesn’t sound prefer it’s considered one of her favourite qualities about herself. “I really like actually excessive heels, so it turns into an issue typically,” Blake admitted whereas speaking to Entry Hollywood in 2012. “I simply really feel like large … you don’t wish to really feel like the person.” It’s onerous to think about somebody who seems to be like Blake feeling something lower than attractive, so we hope her peak is one thing she’s discovered a option to embrace by now!

(Photograph by Christopher Polk/Getty Photos for Turner)

In case you hadn’t already guessed, Allison Janney is one tall girl. She’s six toes tall, and he or she’s even mentioned that she loves the benefit her peak typically provides her in her profession… although it wasn’t all the time that means. “I felt like my profession began late and I believe it was due to my peak — and perhaps a few of my confidence points,” she instructed NPR in 2014. “I used to be enjoying 40-year-old ladies after I was 20. I didn’t get thought of for ingenue roles. Possibly I simply wasn’t prepared, however issues began taking place after I turned 38… I believe my peak most likely did have one thing to do with it — however [my height] additionally helped me in sure components. It’s made me undoubtedly extra of a personality actress by way of my love of doing comedy.”

(Photograph by Kevin Winter/Getty Photos)

Despite the fact that the previous first girl stands tall at 5’10”, you may not have realized it as a result of her husband, Barack, is definitely 6’2″… in order that helps. What her peak doesn’t assist, although, is avoiding getting acknowledged in public. “There are occasions after I do disguise it up,” she mentioned throughout an look on Reside! With Jimmy Kimmel in 2012. It’s just a little onerous as a result of I’m so tall, so that you see folks simply sort of me simply because I’m so tall. After which it’s such as you, ‘Oh, it’s you!’ However from time to time I attempt to sneak out… however I don’t get to do it that a lot.”

Despite the fact that she’s a member of the royal household today, Kate Middleton — who proudly stands at 5’11 — used to get made enjoyable of when she was youthful as a result of she was so tall. In reality, in line with what a former classmate has mentioned in regards to the Duchess of Cambridge, it feels like she had a reasonably tough go of it. “She had run right into a pack of bullies who diminished her to an emotional wreck,” the classmate mentioned. “She was the outsider who was most likely too good for her personal good. It didn’t assist that she was so tall and self-conscious about her eczema.” Marvel how these bullies really feel as we speak?

It appears becoming that Uma Thurman is 6’zero″, contemplating how robust she’s been over the course of her profession (and particularly not too long ago) — but it surely wasn’t all the time one thing that she was very happy with. In reality, as she instructed The Solar in 2012, as a young person, she actually struggled together with her peak, and solely not too long ago has she been in a position to embrace it. “Was my peak a difficulty? At practically 6 toes tall, with massive toes, in fact it was!” she mentioned. “When you get a job, you’ll really feel totally different about your self and set up your personal id. It took me till about 35 to stroll with out being self-conscious.”

You could not have realized it, however Gwyneth Paltrow is definitely very tall. She stands at 5’9″, but it surely’s one thing she’s simply been in a position to disguise since her new fiancé, Brad Falchuk, is definitely taller than she is. However although Gwyneth is all about loving herself today, sadly, she struggled loads together with her peak when she was in highschool. “I’m sort of a gangly lady, but it surely was loads worse after I was a young person,” she’s mentioned. If solely that self-conscious teenager had realized who she was destined to develop into when she grew up — perhaps then she would have been just a little simpler on herself!

Even supposing she’s a card-carrying member of the six-foot membership, American Idol star Jordin Sparks isn’t about to let anybody get in the way in which of her embracing her true peak — as she made very clear in a Twitter rant a number of years in the past. “Sure, I’m actually tall,” she wrote in 2014. “Sure, I nonetheless get nervous earlier than I carry out. Sure, I’m mad as hell in regards to the BRICK WALLS I’ve to maintain breaking four music.” Luckily, since she shared these phrases, her profession has solely grown. And now that she’s anticipating her first child, we will’t wait to seek out out if her peak is one thing she’ll move on to her youngsters.

You could not have seen, however comic Aisha Tyler is definitely six toes tall. And for her, that peak didn’t are available an sudden progress spurt — she’s been tall for her complete life, whilst a baby. In her e-book, Self Inflicted Wounds: Heartwarming Tales of Epic Humiliation, she wrote, “For one factor, I used to be terribly tall. In third grade, I used to be virtually twice as tall as a number of the different children.” That needed to be actually onerous, but when anybody made enjoyable of her, we have now a sense they’re regretting it after seeing the place her life has taken her as an grownup.

Though being six toes tall is one thing that Geena Davis has lastly managed to return to simply accept about herself, it wasn’t all the time that means. Whereas speaking to ESPN in 2015, she admitted that she was “tall from minute one,” a thought that consumed her pondering in her childhood. “My fantasy was to take up much less area on this planet,” Geena mentioned. “I discovered this fairy story a few princess that was 1-foot tall, and I wore that e-book out. That’s all I wished, to be petite and enticing. I used to be afraid I’d by no means cease rising.” Luckily, she did, and when she went to Sweden to check at 18, she lastly realized that there are individuals who discovered her peak enticing.

[photomaniacs]

An Interview with Photographer Richard McLaren http://ift.tt/2vp7qVk

What do President Nelson Mandela, Archbishop Desmond Tutu, Tina Turner, Halle Berry, Gwyneth Paltrow, Pierce Brosnan, Jon Bon Jovi, Marc Anthony, Mariah Carey, Jennifer Lopez, Eva Mendes, Orlando Bloom, Patrick Swayze and Heath Ledger have in common? The magical lens of Richard McLaren has captured them all. And this is only a small sampling of famous people who McLaren has photographed in his four decades in the industry.

McLaren, who had already been around the world twice by age 18, has photographed for top publications throughout the globe, including Vogue, InStyle, GQ, Vanity Fair, Elle, Rolling Stone, Glamour, Cosmopolitan, Esquire and more. NASCAR, Ford, The National Guard, Chevrolet, Gulfstream, Rolls Royce, and Sketchers are some of the commercial clients who have also relied on McLaren’s artistry.

Movie studios trust McLaren. When he is provided access to the talent for a day, he tends to do 15 to 20 different set-ups, which means a lot of really fast shooting. This allows the studio to have enough material to send out and promote the movie.

Pierce Brosnan

Phil Mistry: How long have you worked in photography?

Richard McLaren: I have been taking pictures for 35 years, closer to 40 years.

How did you get started?

I started my career when I was about 16 or 17 when I had come out of school and went into work for Scope Features, a photo print news agency which had all the top photographers in London, England on their books. So I used to assist them, all over the world on different assignments from music to fashion to advertising campaigns. I stayed at this agency for about seven or eight years and became a freelance photographer after that.

Heath Ledger

What brought you from London to Los Angeles?

I used to shoot all big-name celebrities. I used to come to America with my photo team and my wife and kids, and we rented a house in Beverly Hills. We used to spend six months in the year in Los Angeles. We would work five-six weeks at a time and then come back after about a month. And then I thought we might as well move here. So in January 2000, I moved the whole family to Los Angeles.

So were you into photography in school?

Oh, yeah. In school, we used to shoot 16mm documentaries, and there was a film club at school.

I have heard that your first job involved putting oil on naked ladies. Is that true?

As I mentioned earlier, I was 16 when I joined the agency in London. There was a studio attached to the agency, and there was one photographer who did all the glamor shots. On my first day, he asked me to rub oil onto naked ladies.

At home that evening my mother asked me how my first day at the job was. I said, “Great, I rubbed oil on two naked ladies, ” and she said, “You’re not going back there tomorrow.” And my brothers said, “Oh, we’ll go in there for you.” My mother is now 96, God bless her, and if I mention it, she still remembers the story and laughs over it.

Eddie Van Halen and David Lee Roth together after 23 years

In 2006 David Lee Roth and the Van Halen brothers, two icons of the music industry reunited, and you witnessed it?

Yes, David Lee Roth and Eddie Van Halen’s hadn’t seen each other for 23 years [since disbanding after their classic 1984 album]. When I turned up, Eddie Van Halen was getting his makeup done, and David Lee Roth’s walked by and they looked at each other and sort of nodded. I told my assistant, “Give me the camera,” as they may have a fight. And then Van Halen said to me, “I would like to do a picture with David?”

The picture of the two of them together that I did ran in Rolling Stone [on the website], and I got thousands upon thousands of hits and turned out to be a historical picture. But then something interesting happened. We shot on a Wednesday, and his manager called me on Friday and asked me not to release the pictures as Van Halen was going into rehab. So the pictures just appeared on the Rolling Stone site.

Tina Turner

Tina Turner did not know how to swim. How did you get her to go into the pool chest deep?

Her manager knew that I could do just one shoot and get them a ton of publicity. Tina had an infinity pool in the south of France, and yes she couldn’t swim, but I managed to get her in the water. It was a funny shoot as I didn’t bring any swimwear with me and I was in the pool in my underpants. My guys were holding the lights in the water, and I was shooting on a 4 x 5 film camera. She was terrified of the water, and one of my assistants was underwater holding her legs.

It worked out to be a very successful picture as we got 40 or 50 covers from the selected frame. I was very into doing pictures that would cause a stir, get a lot of attention and generate publicity—and that was what I was known for.

Jean-Claude Van Damme

How did you get Jean-Claude Van Damme to strip naked and pose with lions?

He was out in South Africa doing a movie, and his manager asked me if I would go out there and do a shoot. My friend has a lion farm in South Africa, and I organized some lion cubs. Ultimately Van Damme, who had a great body and loved himself, was naked and holding up two cubs by the scruff of their necks and that picture ran around the world to promote the movie.

Can things go wrong with celebrities and lions?

They were only lion cubs. However, things went wrong in a different way. I asked a Dubai sheik whether I could shoot in his suite at the hotel in South Africa and he agreed. We shot with six lion cubs, and they ended up ripping the cushions and furniture in the $25,000-per-night suite!

Andrew Zimmern Bizarre Foods poster

Andrew Zimmern Bizarre Foods shoot

Any other disasters ever happened on your shoots?

Sure… I was shooting photos for Paulina Rubio, the Latin singer and actress. It was for a shoe company, and I had pictured her naked on a horse with just her shoes. The daylight studio that the client chose was four floors up, so we got the horse in the freight elevator. The horse wasn’t scared but as soon as we got in the studio he did the biggest pee and it stank. Yes, we had to spend 30 minutes mopping it all up before we could continue.

The picture went up in Mexico City on a huge billboard. However, they had to take it down in 24 hours as numerous drivers kept staring at the poster and crashed their cars!

Nelson Mandela

How did you end up shooting Nelson Mandela?

I was shooting the Miss World pageant in South Africa when I met an associate of Mandela and requested her for an opportunity. There were 78 photography applications before me and I did not have much hope but then two days later she called me and asked to come over the next day.

It was the only time I’ve been nervous on a shoot and I have been with some of the most prestigious people in the world. Understanding what he had gone through, it was the pinnacle of my career.

Desmond Tutu

And Desmond Tutu?

At the same time that I was photographing Mandela, Desmond Tutu was scheduled to retire. The day he retired I got to go to the church, see him pray and did a series of portraits.

And you shot Winnie Mandela as well?

Yes, and also on the same trip without Mandela knowing, I photographed Winnie Mandela as well in Soweto. So I actually shot three iconic people in South Africa on a single trip.

National Guard

What’s in your camera bag?

Digital now although I am a film man, a pure film man! I’ve got 28 boxes of film cameras from 35mm, 645, 66, 67, 4×5, 8×10, whatever, I’ve got basically everything. But now, nobody wants film as such, which is a shame. I am a Canon man and I also shoot digital H2 Hasselblad as well with the IQ digital backs.

The problem with the digital cameras is that they are so d*mn sharp so that if you are shooting anyone older than 15, they look terrible because they show every line and every flaw in your skin. And you have to end up softening everything down. And when you have a big 27-inch preview monitor they say, “Do I look that bad?”

Gulfstream

In the film days, I had certain cameras and lenses that were soft with different qualities. I was then able to use the camera that would work correctly for the person I was shooting. But nowadays you don’t have an option, as the digital cameras are so sharp that they are scary.

I recently shot a veteran singer-songwriter who’s has had a career of 50 years. When the pictures come on the 40-inch monitor, whoa, you see every sore, every vein, everything. These are not the most flattering of cameras but clients like these cameras because they got great quality as you can do a postcard or put it on the side of the hotel and it still looks beautiful. I don’t particularly like it, I think they are too sharp, they are too critical but you have to deliver what the clients want.

But I got this beauty software, which is fantastic, as clients love the way it makes them look.

Colin Farrell

Can you make anybody look beautiful?

My forte in photography is lighting. I always make people look beautiful.

The problem with digital now is that you don’t have to be technically fantastic or brilliant or even good because you got all these computer experts that can tweak and change the color, soften it, make it look flattering on the skin or whatever.

Heather Graham, Polaroid Transfer

In the film days, you just got [the film] processed and that was WHAT IT WAS. Now you can pull a recipe on the computer so that when you shoot a picture, it comes in the way you wanted it to look. At the end of the day, it’s the end result that matters not what came out of the camera.

It’s [beauty software] amazing software for men or women. You can change the noses, you can change the lips, and you can change the eyes. You don’t have to have a retoucher with you anymore as you can just run this software, which takes roughly 3 minutes to work.

Emirates Airline, HQ Building, Dubai

Your Emirates image landed up covering the complete side of a building at the airport. Did you have to shoot it in a particular way, so that it could be enlarged this big?

No, we just shot that on the Hasselblad and they enlarged it to something crazy like 240 feet high. It ended up being the biggest Billboard ever done in Dubai

Do your photos get used without permission?

My photos go directly to the clients or magazines. But after they have used it they do end up on the Internet and there is not much you can do about it, whether they have scanned it from a magazine or whatever.

Dance Moms

Have you ever sued for unauthorized use?

No. But back in London, many years ago, there was a company I did shoot for and they were published in Esquire and someone scanned the images and was selling in a record store. Esquire went to court after them but then that company just closed down. So you end up spending 30 grand and get nothing. It may work out for big companies but for me, it doesn’t make sense as it costs thousands of dollars and you may not get any money back.

Patrick Swayze

When you photographed Patrick Swayze dancing in Pinewood Studios, a paparazzi shooter got the photos published before you could even process the film. How did that feel?

That shoot was actually at an airport hangar in Santa Monica and was for Mondo Uomo in Italy. I never saw any other photographer there but he must have been shooting from far with a 400-600mm lens and the next day the photos appeared in one of those rag magazines. The editor called me to protest but that was the only time it happened to me, after which I have been much more on the ball. If I have done big names, I have had security.

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony got together for the first time for their album in a Miami house by the ocean. Paparazzi were coming by in boats but I just had a 12 feet high black curtain put around the location. If you are going to shoot near a public beach where paparazzi are going to be there, they are going to find you but you have to be alert.

Marc Anthony

Celebrities like Beyoncé are taking their own pictures and posting them to Instagram. Is this cutting out the professional photographer?

No. Social media has made it easier for celebrities to post pictures but they still need great photographers to shoot great photos.

How limited are the limited-edition prints you are selling on your site?

I’m doing 20×30 inch prints in an edition of 20 prints at the moment. I will see how the interest is and then maybe release another edition in a different size, like 30×40 or 16×20 inches.

Emirates Airline’s A319 private jet charter fleet, Dubai

Do you still shoot in anything other than digital?

Yes, I do personal projects. I do portraits on wet-plate collodion [invented in 1851] on 16×20 inch cameras with brass lenses. I take the photos on black glass or aluminum and the photos are incredible. I love shooting on large format cameras like Linhof but nobody wants it anymore, which is a shame.

Recently you have been directing videos. How does it feel not to be behind the camera yourself?

I love shooting motion and I have got into it because the cameras we use are capable of shooting it now, so it’s opened up the business for the photographer. I like directing and I operate the camera as well, so I can do all basically. We do TV poster shoots for shows and nine times out of ten the client will ask for a video as well. And it works out cheaper for the client, as they don’t have to bring in different crews for stills and motion.

NASCAR drivers at Daytona

What cameras are you using to shoot video?

We shoot on the RED, ARRI Alexa and the Canons. When we shot the Emirates Airlines commercial, we shot the Canon on 4K and the quality is beautiful.

Do you pull stills from your 4K videos?

I don’t because I prefer to shoot stills with my still cameras unless it’s something you can’t get on your still camera. When you have someone running towards you, there is a greater chance of getting a perfect frame at 24 fps than with just 10 fps on a still camera.

Eva Mendes

What lighting do you use?

Profoto. That’s what I like. I’ll shoot Broncolor. I’ll shoot whatever is available but my go to is Profoto.

And what lighting do you use for videos?

We’ll just bring HMIs although we shoot a lot of daylight videos as well.

Emirates Airlines

Between still and video how much equipment do you have to carry to a shoot?

For the Emirates Airlines campaign, I took 3 tons of equipment to Dubai: 6 huge flat cases with the lighting, 12 camera cases and probably 10 bags of accessories. There were 80 people on the shoot that lasted for 12 days. I had 40 models, 7 assistants, 1 digital tech, hair and makeup stylists, art directors and ad agency people from Holland, clients, crew and local runners.

I shot 30 print campaigns and four motion commercials. And earlier it took 2 hours to clear all that equipment through customs at 1 AM in the morning at Dubai airport!

Pamela Anderson

You have said that photography is 90% personality and 10% photography. What do you mean?

For me it is. I’m not blowing my own trumpet but I feel I have a very good personality and can really converse with people whatever they are, homeless individuals or kings and queens. Sometimes I have a DJ on set to get a great atmosphere going and relax everybody.

I know a lot of creative directors who work with photographers who won’t say anything during a shoot. They will let the creative director direct and they will just press the button. Now I can’t do that, as I like to be in control of how the shot is going to look. Working with the creative director is very important but once the creative director starts talking they lose respect for the photographer because the photographer is letting someone else take control of the shoot.

I like to speak to the celebrity and tell them what we are trying to achieve. I will let them come and look at the monitor to review the images because most of them are very insecure. They are great in front of the motion camera but when they get in front of the still camera, there’s not too many of them comfortable to be there. So I try to make it fun for them to be there and get them in and out of the studio or location as quickly as possible and do what’s needed and not overshoot.

National Guard

You have said that you would like to shoot Nicole Kidman in Antarctica. Why Antarctica?

I love shooting in offbeat places. Celebrities are always shot in the studio or their beautiful homes, but rarely in great locations. If you look at the great photographs of movie stars from the 50s and 60s, there’s a jazz photographer called William Claxton. He did great images of Steve McQueen in various situations and you just don’t see those kinds of images anymore.

The pictures that are shot now are very safe, very easy and just what the magazine wants. I just think Nicole Kidman in Antarctica would be incredible, maybe fishing through a hole in the ice or something.

Jenny McCarthy

What attracts you about the photos of Stephen Klein and Peter Lindbergh?

Oh yeah, I love their stuff especially Klein’s work for Italian Vogue. I love the classic photographers, including Richard Avedon, Irving Penn and Patrick Demarchelier. I’ve got probably 350 photography books from pinhole to modern day. Film was tough to shoot on, mostly black-and-white film. Color is easy but when you shoot black-and-white, you got to know your tones to get a great image.

Gwyneth Paltrow

Your black-and-white portrait of Gwyneth Paltrow is high in contrast with the middle tones washed out. Do you like that kind of tonality?

My best medium is black-and-white. Back in the day, there used to be six grades of printing paper from 0 to 5. I would always print on grade 5 so that the blacks were black and the whites were white and there were no gray tones. I got all my black-and-white prints hanging up in my house and all of them are printed real contrasty: jet-black blacks and white whites, there are no mid tones or grays in them at all. That’s how I like my black and whites.

How did you get the assignment on the book China: The New Long March?

A book publisher in Australia asked me if I would shoot for the book on China. They work with Chinese photographers and I was the only photographer from outside China. It was about re-tracing Mao Zedong’s long march. I don’t exactly remember but this book was the 75th year of the Long March. Each photographer had a section of China to shoot and I was in Chengdu and went up to the snow mountain.

Barry Manilow

What’s on your bucket list?

I want to travel more. I want to go to different parts of the world. There is an Indian festival called Holi where all the colorful powder is thrown over everybody. I love to go off and do these adventurous things. Maybe photograph Queen Elizabeth II!

Would that make you nervous?

No, no. I got nervous with only Mandela because he’s one of the biggest icons in the world. That’s the only time in my career that I’ve ever been nervous. You have protocols to follow and how you address her and that’s a bit nerve-racking, but the photography side wouldn’t bother me at all and I’m sure I’d make her look beautiful.

John Hurt

How did you get Halle Barry to do that risqué pose for the magazine covers?

It might have been for the X-Men movie that she was in. She was known in America but not really in Europe. This was for the FHM (For Him Magazine) and I talked to her manager and said I want to shoot her naked because I want to create a stir. And that shot went on to 22 FHM covers around the world. And it helped her get recognized in Europe!

How do you get celebrities to trust you?

The press representatives usually know who the photographers are and so do the celebrities. It’s easier now with digital as they come and look at the monitor and see the picture the instant you click the camera. I always make sure that the first picture is a beautiful, beautiful image and straightaway you have them in your pocket and they trust you.

Lagoon Jewels

Should photographers have an agent?

I’ve never really had an agent in the past. My ex-wife used to run my business and when we split up, I did my own thing. I go from jump to jump by word of mouth. I took on, Joanna Flores as my agent recently.

The problem with agents is that photographers rely on them to get work. When I’m not working, I’m in my office with my staff looking for a job and what the next thing is to do. Right now I have reached out to Air New Zealand, cruise ships including P&O Cruises, Discover Ireland, Alaska Airlines, Visit Britain and something very dear to my heart The David Sheldrick Wildlife Trust in Kenya.

Doobie Brothers

Have you shot covers of magazines in the US?

I’ve done a couple of covers in America but the most of my covers when I used to shoot for them are European publications as they are more risqué. I can do nudes on the cover of German GQ and that’s acceptable. With the European magazines, they’re not so set in what they want whereas here if you shoot for Cosmopolitan, it has to be on a white background or a yellow background, the lighting has to be the same, etc. So every cover looks the same just that it has a different person. This is boring to me.

Linda Evangalista

How has celebrity photography changed in the last 35 years that you have been in it?

I think social media is hurting it a lot. The celebrities can now shoot their own pictures. If Ronaldo comes out with a new soccer boot and puts it up on his Facebook page, he gets 3 million hits or whatever! Social media has changed the way the celebrity thing works now which never used to be the case when I was actively shooting. Now with iPhones, it is more accessible for everybody. The paparazzi are videoing the celebrities and then it’s all over online.

Do you think still shooting will go away and everything will be on video?

No, there will always be a need for [still] photography in some sort.

Do you use social media to get work?

I’m not into social media. If you look at my Facebook page, I got about a thousand followers. I don’t really care about social media. I do it because my daughters ask me to. My office posts stuff. I’m not bothered about it. It doesn’t make or break me, and it doesn’t get me work. A lot of people rely on it to get work, but I don’t think it’s going to get me one job. I can use social media to say this is what I’ve recently done if you want to look at it.

Brush Company

Do you shoot selfies with celebrities?

No, never. I don’t have one picture of me with a celebrity. Not my scene. If a celebrity wants to do a picture with me, I do it. I don’t like having my pictures taken. I don’t think I look great in pictures.

Magazines are folding up, and in 10 years there might be very few left. How will that work for you?

In 10 years there won’t be any [printed] magazines. Everything will be online. I get 50 magazines delivered to me every month. It’s nice to flip through them, and you don’t get that same feeling when you do it online. I like to rip pages out and reference them, so I hope magazines never go away.

Jeff Gordon

So if you hadn’t made it as a photographer what would you have done? 

A racecar driver! I don’t know, maybe because of the McLaren [British sports/racing car] name or whatever it was, but I always wanted to be a racing driver of some sort. That was my dream, and then I stumbled into photography by sheer chance. But I am a fanatical Formula 1 and motorsport fan and would have loved to be a racing driver.

Brooke Shields

You have been shooting for almost 40 years. Does the word retirement ever cross your mind?

No, not at all. I love the business too much. Every day I wake up I kick myself because I can’t believe I am in the business I am in. I get to travel the world extensively, and meet great people, from Nelson Mandela to Tina Turner to aborigines in Australia. I have an amazing life, and I am just a boy from London from a working-class family. You couldn’t even get these experiences if you are willing to pay for them. I feel I am blessed in life and it couldn’t be any better. Even now I get excited as every day you don’t know what you’re going to do next.

You can follow Richard McLaren and see more of his work on his website, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Vimeo.

About the author: Phil Mistry is a photographer and teacher based in Atlanta, GA. He started one of the first digital camera classes in New York City at International Center of Photography in the 90s. He was the director and teacher for Sony/Popular Photography magazine’s Digital Days Workshops. You can reach him via email here.

Image credits: All photos © Richard McLaren and used with permission

Go to Source Author: <a href="http://ift.tt/2rSvwoU Mistry</a> If you’d like us to remove any content please send us a message here CHECK OUT THE TOP SELLING CAMERAS!

The post An Interview with Photographer Richard McLaren appeared first on CameraFreaks.

August 04, 2017 at 10:02PM

[mageofblack6]

New York, New Week

Day two starts here. I took an Uber with an actor to my apartment and he said he was starting a business and gave me his card. My living situations were interesting. I got the top bunk of a bunk bed in this three bedroom Air BnB where my host doesn't even live here and the front door to the apartment doesn't actually shut... there could be up to 9 girls here which I thought there was going up to four. (Including the host). I had trouble getting in the day before because the host's designated person to live here didn't even know I was coming so I didn't have a bed when I first arrived last night. Eventually I got into the apartment building and left my stuff to find my school. It was a fifty minute walk down Broadway, i saw naked girls and Disney characters and dancers. There were a lot of people. I eventually found the street my new school was supposed to be on but I circled the block twice trying to find it. A man from the Dominican Republic let me into the building because it seemed to be the right one. His accent sounded Hungarian. Once I was inside I left to return back to my apartment as it was getting dark. Next morning I woke up to loud police cars making an awful noise and using a speaker to tell people to get out of the way. I really had to pee but from 9-10:30 there were females in the one bathroom. Eventually I got into the bathroom did my business in and was ready to go to orientation. That process was somewhat inspiring the teachers seemed to love what they do and they do it well. They know what their craft is and they're wanting to share it in as little time as possible. The safety orientation was incredible, the instructor was entertaining and hilarious. Once we got our schedules we needed to find Barnes and noble, My phone wouldn't pull it up so I decided to find a group headed that way and went with them. They were young, loud, and obnoxious so I ended up chatting with one of the moms there. She bought my school books and gave me her card and invited me to Long Island when I get settled in. She was beautiful and looked young and she was really nice, only a little bit ditzy but it was very endearing. I really like her. I realized I live directly off where Wicked is ran and I am so close to Broadway I can pretty much taste it. After getting my books I walked home, saw some break dancers, and went to find The Waitress. I impulsively bought a ticket (later I had to exchange the day because I realized I have class) and found a clothing store to apply to, as well as a grocery store. I bought a week's worth of breakfast and lunch and ramen for dinner for $40 and the couple in front of me bought 5 or 6 items and spent $74, so I was doing good spending food money. I returned home exhausted and organized and moved my stuff to the side, put my schedule in my phone and tried to relax. I keep missing Love and my puppy and my cat, but I really like this type of life, I feel like I could do this again. Let's see how I feel after a month. Ive almost finished learning exactly where I need to go without a map. Yesterday a German girl stripped and then climbed into the bed below mine.. which I thought belonged to the Host's designated person... and then that person also climbed in the bed too... I think they're together. I went to my first class, a dance class with a really sweet teacher who reminded me that I could do musical theatre on ships: definitely a future option. We had lunch but because I searched for my keys for 18 minutes I forgot my breakfast and lunch so I bought delicious lunch at a hummus pita place. It was great. We returned to class which was a scene class and we shared our experiences and given a couple scenes. Then proceeded to out vocal class where I accidentally held my breath too long. After dinner we had a song performance and our teacher was interesting. Reminded me of a teacher back in Georgia. We did an exercise where we each sang a line of the new song in a circle and then we needed to speak it as a monologue. Everyone in the room went there were some really compelling actors and amazing talent in the room. One of them even made me tear up-- and she was the one that struggled the second most. Another teared up herself in the beginning! For my turn, the instructors blurted it that I was different and unique and I believe they even said I was weird. They told me I was almost not human and almost a celestial being. They told me I could be someone from what sounded like a show with mermaids? Unfortunately I forgot to write it down. But also that I was very different in the sense that there was no one like me at all. (Then they told the rest of the class that they also were unique so they didn't leave them out and came back and told me that I was especially unique) and that I was a natural comedian (I laughed because I was told multiple times by other people I have no sense of humor). One of them told me that I am that person who makes the 'cool' choice but then I shut it down. That I have a ray of sun in me that I basically flash and then shut down. I felt like I was having my fortune told. After classes ended I rushed to the train with a classmate to find the trains broken and then she bought a taxi ride halfway to my apartment. I walked the rest of the way and then back at my apartment I studied and showered. I discovered the German and the host's host aren't dating. I listened to the screams as the cast of Wicked came out to sign autographs. I also bought a filter water bottle because the tap water here tastes gross so I tried to make it work... and I kind of made it work and then it was bed time because New York, I'm discovering is exhausting. I woke up multiple times and had a bad dream so I thought I'd be exhausted come the next school day, and I honestly was. But our movement course was a lot of ensemble building without the ensemble. He wanted us to emphasize on ourself within the circle and decide everyone else will follow which was a really unique way of looking at it. He told us he didn't want our group mentality to be ensemble building. He wanted us to be grounded within ourselves. We basically did running knees. Together. Attempting and failing at being exactly in unison but eventually we figured it out. Out next course was an acting course where he asked us to bring a private moment in class and to follow people around and mimic their walks. Our film course is going to be the hardest for me though the music we listened to was gorgeous, I don't know how I'm going to remember the people or the songs and certainly I don't understand how the American songbook songs would be a good use for auditions if they don't want you to sing a very well known song and everyone knows the American songbook... but I'll take notes and listen. Our last class in song performance we did an exciting exercise where we each sang the song in concession and the first time around was just changing keys. The second time around we were given circumstances with the music and we needed to respond to it. Some of the stories were extremely compelling and it was incredible to create he same story with someone without talking about it first. I headed home and didn't do my homework, still super sore from dance and movement. I woke up this morning and looked up Squeaky Fromme, as she is one of my characters and I found out she's still alive and probably in Rome. She was a very interesting person to read about. I also read about Gypsy Rose Lee who died in the 80s of cancer. In dance class I got hit by another student. She always takes up twice her space in room and we were doing choreography and she takes a little longer to learn or understand what's going on and is a little slower in her movement. So she hit me. And gave me a headache for half the day. She always ends up next to me so she always bumps into me or hits me and she's overall annoying in that way. I think she has a good heart and good intentions. But she's still young and has to grow up some. Our next class was scene study and we read our scenes in a circle, I made some discoveries and I definitely favor Squeaky Fromme. I really feel like I can identify with her on a base level. I'd LOVE to meet her. Our next class was song performance where we each were given two song to memorize, one with the group, and one specifically for us. Mine was definitely an interesting combination. I can't wait to start working on it. Then we had our monologue class where we met Dia. And she's a hoot. She's the actress I used to see and thought I could never be like, but now I know I'm more like her than others. She let us know about an amazing shop for plays and the library lets us see Broadway without having to pay for it. (Old shows of course). She had a little trouble finding me a monologue, but when she did it was an "I love you" pep talk and it suited me extremely well. Following that was reading for our acting course tomorrow and passing out early from exhaustion. Which didn't end up being too early because I was sharing some of myself with Love and acknowledging that Ex and Molester were toxic people and trying to talk to me and it reminded me of how grateful it was to have Love around. Even if he was tons of miles away. He was and is one of the best things that ever happened to me. And this opportunity is one of the best things I've ever sought.

[madpicks]

New Post has been published on https://www.madpicks.com/culture/tv/guide-promising-ridiculous-pilots-fall-2017-season/

A Guide To The Most Promising (And Ridiculous) Pilots For The Fall 2017 Season

There’s entirely too much television, and come this fall, there’s going to be even more. That’s when approximately 70 pilots hit the Big Four networks — ABC, CBS, Fox, and NBC — and The CW, because your DVR isn’t already struggling enough. We haven’t actually seen any of the new series, but the plot descriptions and casts have been released, giving us an opportunity to make premature evaluations on our future favorite show. Using this guide, we highlighted five of the most promising-sounding pilots, and five of the most ridiculous. That’s not the same thing as “worst,” mind you. Is a drama about a “superstar magician” going to be any good? Probably not, but we can’t wait to watch it.

The Potentially Great

1. A.P. Bio (NBC)

A hilariously cynical Ivy League professor (Glenn Howerton) loses out on his dream job and goes to work as a high school biology teacher where he imposes his unorthodox teaching style and uses the kids to plot out revenge on those who wronged him.

Following the It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia season 12 finale, Howerton told us that it’s “not entirely certain” whether he’s leaving the show or not. “I might be, but I might not be,” he confessed. “That really is the truth.” His availability largely depends on the success of A.P. Bio, which stars not only the Sunny co-developer in his first lead role in a network sitcom since That ’80s Show, but Patton Oswalt, who plays Principal Durbin, “a timid, petite, nervous mouse of a man.” The pilot was written by SNL‘s Mike O’Brien, and Seth Meyers is attached as an executive producer. It would be a huge surprise if A.P. Bio failed. We’ll have to wait to find out what that means for Sunny.

2. Ghosted (FOX)

A cynical skeptic (Craig Robinson) and a genius “true believer” in the paranormal (Adam Scott) are recruited by The Bureau Underground to look into the rampant “unexplained” activity in Los Angeles — all while uncovering a larger mystery that could threaten the existence of the human race.

This description reads kind of like a comedy version of The X-Files but with Adam Scott as David Duchovny and Craig Robinson as Gillian Anderson. I hope that was the entire pitch, now that I think about it.

“So you know The X-Files?”

“Yeah…”

“Well this is like that, but with Adam Scott from Parks and Rec as Mulder and Craig Robinson from The Office as Scully.”

“… as Scully?”

“Basically, yeah. And funny.”

“Okay, yeah. That’ll work.”

3. Household Name (ABC)

This multi-camera comedy follows a family who has an opportunity to buy the house of their dreams but under extremely abnormal circumstances: They must live with the previous owner, an eccentric, larger-than-life actress (Carol Burnett).

Multi-camera comedies have gotten a bad name in last 8-10 years as single-camera shows have seen their stars rise (Veep, Parks and Recreation, 30 Rock, etc. etc. etc.), but this one falls into the promising category for two reasons: Carol Burnett and Amy Poehler. Poehler is producing only, which is both good (she’s also a producer on Broad City, so there’s a track record here) and bad (whhhyyyy can’t I have a show where Carol Burnett plays Amy Poehler’s mom, preferable written by Mike Schur and Tina Fey and co-starring The Rock as their neighbor?). But still, just those two names make this one interesting.

4. Libby & Malcolm (ABC)

A blended family comedy about two polar-opposite political pundits (Felicity Huffman and Courtney B. Vance) who fall in love despite all odds and form an insta-family as well as a work partnership.

ABC has high hopes for Libby & Malcolm: it was the first official order of the pilot season. The network is probably right to be optimistic. The timely comedy stars American Crime‘s Felicity Huffman and American Crime Story‘s Courtney B. Vance, who won the Emmy for Outstanding Lead Actor in a Limited Series or Movie for his convincing performance as Johnnie Cochran, and comes from black-ish creator Kenya Barris. That’s a lot of crime, and even more talent.

5. Me, Myself, & I (CBS)

A single-camera comedy examining one man’s life over a 50-year span. The show will focus on three distinct periods in his life – as a 14-year-old in 1991, a 40-year-old (Bobby Moynihan) in the present day, and a 65-year-old (John Larroquette) in 2042.

This show had me at “Bobby Moynihan and John Larroquette playing different versions of the same character.” Also, please note the name “Jaleel White” six-deep in the cast list. Will it be any good? I have no idea. Could it all go to crap before even making it to the air? Of course. But am I intrigued? Very.

The Definitely Goofy

1. Deception (ABC)

When his career is ruined by scandal, superstar magician Cameron Black (Jack Cutmore-Scott) has only one place to turn to practice his art of deception, illusion, and influence — the FBI. He’ll become the world’s first consulting illusionist, helping the government solve crimes that defy explanation and trap criminals by using deception.

If there’s one thing I have always said about network television, it’s that there are not nearly enough shows about disgraced magicians working with the FBI. Sure, The Mentalist is kind of that. And Psych was sort of that, almost. But that’s not the point. The point is that this is happening and the blurb contains the phrase “the world’s first consulting illusionist,” which makes me so happy I might just explode right here in my seat. I hope a disgraced magician investigates my death. No, I demand it. Now that I know it’s an option, I can’t accept anything else.

The only downside here, and it is a small one, is that I joked about this blurb on Twitter and someone replied with a “You’re off the case, turn in your badge and wand joke,” and I was immediately furious I didn’t think of it first.

2. The Get (CBS)

A team of tireless internet journalists pursues and exposes stories of injustice using their unconventional investigative techniques in today’s anything-goes world of reporting.

The first thing I, an internet journalist, do when I wake up in the morning is go to the bathroom. Then I have a quick breakfast, maybe some healthy oatmeal or Pop-Tarts (it’s Pop-Tarts), while I scroll through Twitter, Facebook, CNN, Reddit, the Hollywood Reporter, etc. When I find something that piques my interest, I write about it. Before I know it, it’s three in the afternoon, I haven’t left the bed (except to go to the bathroom again and maybe eat some leftover pizza for lunch), and I’m still wearing the same pair of nasty gym shorts that I fell asleep in. I hope that’s what The Get is about. Anything goes!

3. Insatiable (The CW)

When a disgraced, dissatisfied civil lawyer-turned-beauty pageant coach (Dallas Roberts) takes on a vengeful, bullied teenager as his client, he has no idea what he’s about to unleash upon the world.

Look, anyone can be anything. Are you an airline pilot who wants to serve fast food burgers? You can do it! Are you a janitor at a fancy Boston college who thinks you’re meant to be a rocket scientist, or whatever happens to Matt Damon in Good Will Hunting? Why not! Insatiable takes this idea to the extreme. As far as premises go, “civil lawyer-turned-beauty pageant coach” is a thing of beauty. It’s like the creator couldn’t settle on the professions, so she randomly flipped through the phonebook and landed on “civil lawyer” and “beauty pageant coach.” (I don’t care if it’s “inspired” by a real-life story — it’s still hilarious.) If Insatiable doesn’t work, everyone can try again next year on Unquenchable, about a marine biologist-turned-monster truck driver.

4. Wisdom of the Crowd (CBS)

Based on the Israeli format of the same name, and inspired by the notion that a million minds are better than one, a tech innovator (Jeremy Piven) creates a cutting-edge crowdsourcing hub to solve his own daughter’s murder, as well as revolutionizing crime solving in San Francisco.

Jeremy Piven plays a billionaire who is solving his daughter’s murder with science. I freaking love it. I can see him now, butting heads with the old school cops who wants to solve crime the old fashioned way, hitting the streets and working sources and such. “

PIVEN: Umm, actually, my app has already triangulated the killer’s location.

OLD SCHOOL COP: What’s this guy talkin’ about?

PIVEN: [Jeremy Piven face]

5. Young Sheldon (CBS)

The series follows The Big Bang Theory’s Sheldon Cooper (Iain Armitage) at the age of 9, living with his family in East Texas and going to high school.

The Big Bang Theory is a very popular show. The actors have been nominated for a million Emmys (and made millions of dollars), and despite being 10 seasons in, 19 million people regularly tune in to see what sort of wacky misadventures Howard and Rajesh are getting into this week. That’s a lot of millions. I get why CBS executives want to keep the Big Bang train a-rollin’ — especially with the stars getting increasingly expensive — but to paraphrase Jeff Goldblum in Jurassic Park, they were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should. They shouldn’t, but they did, and now something called Young Sheldon will probably bring in five times as many viewers as The Good Place. Maybe we’re living in the Bad Place?

The Potentially Great and Definitely Goofy

1. Untitled Marc Cherry Project (ABC)

Ruby Adair (Reba McEntire), the sheriff of colorful small town Oxblood, KY, finds her red state outlook challenged when a young FBI agent of Middle Eastern descent is sent to help her solve a horrific act. They form an uneasy alliance as Ruby takes the agent behind the lace curtains of this Southern Gothic community to meet an assortment of bizarre characters, each with a secret of their own.

I’m not sure exactly how this will play out but all I can picture right now is the first season of True Detective but with Reba McEntire as Rust Cohle. It’s all you can picture now, too, I bet. You’re very welcome.

The One Show Each Writer Cares Way Too Much About

Brian: Dynasty

I’m interested in Dynasty for two reasons:

One, it’s produced by Josh Schwartz, who created The O.C. and has solid history when it comes to fun dramas about rich families with problems.

Two, the last time someone tried to reboot a popular ’80s show about a troubled wealthy family, it was TNT’s version of Dallas, which gave us the single greatest GIF in TV history: Judith Light snorting cocaine at a rodeo.

TNT

Josh: Every “Untitled” series

Did I watch a single episode of AMC’s Untitled Billy Corgan Wrestling Project?

Nope.

Do I know if Untitled Billy Corgan Wrestling Project even made it to air?

No clue.

But three years later, am I still obsessed with Untitled Billy Corgan Wrestling Project?

Of course. Because it’s called Untitled Billy Corgan Wrestling Project!

I’m actually fascinated by all Untitled [Name or Collection of Words] Projects, and this fall has some gems. There’s the aforementioned Untitled Marc Cherry Project, as well as Untitled Paul William Davies Project, Untitled Single Dad Project, Untitled Jenny Lumet Project, Untitled Navy SEAL Project, Untitled Marvel Action-Adventure Series, and Untitled University Project. Do I plan on watching any of these shows? Other than the Marc Cherry one and maybe whatever Marvel is brewing, of course not. But would I check out Untitled Single Dad Project if it stayed with that title, and not switch to something generic, like Bad Dad? You bet. Also, #BringBackUntitledBillyCorganWrestlingProject.