#so im glad its getting recognition even if its not for the entirely correct reason

[here-comes-the-idiotbox]

people are reblogging the marketplace post again.... they dont know.............. They Don’t Know........................................

[gablucia]

Version of alternate Starfall in ACOMAF

“They don’t know—what she did to me on Starfall. I don’t want it to ruin their night.” 

“I don’t think it would. They’d be happy if you let them shoulder the burden.” 

“The same way you rely on others to help with your own troubles?” 

We stared at each other, close enough to share breath. And maybe all those words bottled up in me… Maybe I didn’t need them right now. My fingers grazed his. Warm and sturdy—patient, as if waiting to see what else I might do. Maybe it was the wine, but I stroked a finger down his. 

My eyes followed the trace my finger was making as I blurted, “That’s just the way it’s always been I guess..” 

He looked down upon me with questionable violet eyes as if asking me to continue “My family would’ve died without me, you gathered that much. The reason I don’t rely on other to help me with ‘my troubles’ is because for 18 years I’ve had to rely on me and only me to solve mine and my family’s troubles”. 

I wasn’t looking him in the eyes as I ranted about my life growing up, but when I finally did work up the courage to look up at him, I was not met with pity or sadness, but instead recognition and understanding. 

“Feyre” he purred sympathetically. I dared myself to say more, to question whether I do need someone to share this load I’ve been carrying around my entire life. 

But instead I shut it down, like I always do. “I can take care of myself you know”, I stated with a slight smile upon my lips to keep the conversation light. 

He smirked at this and glared up at the sky above us, I hadn’t realized until this moment we were mere inches apart, the lull of the music upon us, itching at my skin, making me sway to the beat. 

“Feyre Archeron, if there is one thing I know about you in the time I’ve spent with you, it’s that you are the most stubborn, strong, fearless, and beautiful gift the gods could’ve given me”. 

I was a bit taken aback, and I think it showed on my face because he caught himself after he also spilt his true feelings, I saw he was looking for a way to correct what’s been said, which is rare for Rhys to say something that surprises even him. 

He’s always meticulous, one step ahead, constantly prepared with a whitty comeback. This time, he’s off his guard. Now it was my turn. 

“Rhys” I said slowly, my face calm. 

“I-“ but before he could say more I put my finger to his lips to stop him from speaking and his violet eyes were now crossed as he peered down the bridge of his nose at my finger. 

“I just want – I just want to dance, will you dance with me?”, I pleaded. 

He nodded with that insistent smirk on his face that I’m so glad I get to see every day, and I want him to know that, know I am happy to have him here. He wrapped his hands around my waist as I, with a bit of struggle because he’s so tall, reached up to lay my hands upon his shoulders. 

“I meant it” he said almost too low for me to hear. 

“Thank you” my blush was definitely noticeable. 

“You’re very welcome, Feyre darling”. 

We stayed there, not speaking, but speaking all the same because I somehow knew exactly what he was feeling in this moment, without him having to say a word. I wondered if he felt the same pull coming from me. It was the most difficult thing to make sense of, this unrelenting tug at my heart that no matter what I may be going through, Rhys, without ever pushing me, is a rock for me to hold on to. Never breaking, or moving, through our misshaped lives. 

I heard a sigh come from deep in his throat as he lay his head atop my own, in one of the most intimate dance stances. I haven’t been this close to someone since… I coughed, which shattered our embrace. 

“I don’t know – I cant.” I flung my hands in the air in dramatic exasperation, because I couldn’t make sense of how I was feeling, so how could I even speak it, looking around us, I noticed no one was near us. 

What time was it & how long had we been here? Where were the stars, falling?? oh gods, I missed it. 

All my emotions were flooding through me as I came to my senses on what exactly was I doing dancing with Rhysand. 

“I know what you’re thinking.” He stated. “Get out of my head!” I yelled. 

“Try again. It’s all over your face Feyre”. I sighed. 

“Im sorry –”, now I felt terrible for accusing him.  

“Theres nothing to apologize for”, he said soothingly. 

“But there is. This – All of this”, I motioned around us and between us, now feet apart, music still blaring. “How can I feel – why am I feeling this way?”. 

I was completely confused with myself. I turned around to lean over the balcony as light bounced around the sky, reflecting off my dress. When I gazed my eyes upon the midnight sky surrounding Rhys and I, I was in true awe. So this, was starfall. 

I couldn’t find the right words to explain the scenery ever-changing around me, my heart began to race with excitement. I felt calluses scrape against the palm of my hand, and didn’t need to see what Rhys was doing, grasping my tiny artist hands in his, almost twice the size of mine. 

Looking away from the gorgeous view, mouth still agape, I thought I’d see Rhys watching the same view as I was. With more composure, and not in complete admiration like I was. 

But what I saw instead was Rhys not looking at the stars, or spirits, which was later explained to me, but looking directly at me. Deeply and intently. Telling my eyes something much more. 

Do I look away? Or will he? I know how excited he was to see this ceremony, so I want him to watch. He was going to kiss me I could feel somewhere deep in my bones. 

And then he looked away, which left me deflated. 

Suddenly realizing, I wanted to him to kiss me, inside I was begging for him. 

“Wow, have I missed this”, he said in a breathy voice, in complete happiness. 

And I thought I would do what any woman in my position would do, snuggle up to his chest and watch the lights in front of us. 

But I was not any woman, instead, the selfish part of me wanted to steal this moment. I never looked away from him. I brought my hand up to his face and immediately felt the scruff rub against the palm of my hand as I cupped his face. 

All he did was close his eyes. Please look at me. Please look at me. Before I could prepare myself, he opened his eyes for a split second stealing his eyes from the stars. 

I felt his lips immediately on mine before I could register what was happening. Ever so gently, he parted my lips and it felt like a soft, tender invitation to something I would never forget. He moaned slightly, which made me smile lightly under his kiss. 

He deepened our moment further, entangling his hand in my hair and the other cupping the small of my back to keep me balanced. My one hand was still on his face and the other lazily draped around his neck. I wanted more, much more. And that’s when I felt something break inside me. Stumbling, but still enwrapped in Rhys’ arms, I placed my hand on my chest as if I had a sharp pain. 

“Feyre, what is it?”, Rhys asked, sounding more concerned than I’ve ever heard him.

 “I – I don’t know, just feels like I got hit or punched almost? I’m not entirely sure?”, I giggled I actually giggled, you idiot. 

Still smiling I caught a glimpse of Rhys’ expression, which was straining to smile, but something held him back. 

“Rhys, its like you’ve seen a ghost, I’m okay, see!”, and I spun around in my sparkling dress to show him I was feeling fine, just a little hiccup in our moment. 

He whispered “what have I done.” 

Well what in the heavens did that mean? Did he regret kissing me? But I thought-  

He was mumbling to himself. Why was he worried about me anyways he seemed like the one who was not all with it right now. 

“Rhys, Feyre! Come upstairs and look at this view with us!”, Mor’s lilting voice traveled to us as she spoke from the doorway. I smiled at her, silently telling her we will be right there. 

But when I turned back around to the railing, Rhys had disappeared…