#so im not far off base

[donthitanybody]

The two year old insists on watching the same hot wheels video every day, and its just getting to me. Anyway, I've decided these two are t4t lesbians, and no one can stop me.

[flambo19]

Stelle: "No, I won't question the pretty girl"

[limesquares]

>Persons of interest involved in a recent security breach incident.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

a quick half-baked scribble of Coral & her pet lovely daughter

[lansangprincess]

am i the only one that thinks francesca bridgerton is giving high mask "u cant have autism ure so sexy aha"

like people clearly think she's kinda odd but she's pretty so they brush it off. she only participates in the season because she's expected to not because she's necessarily nerve-wracked or offended by it, gets really excited when someone lets her talk about her interests and enjoys most the company of the one person that will deliberately sit there and not talk to her

[captn3]

until next time.... stay fresh [plain text: until next time.... stay fresh]

[funkily]

i think traffic scott has crazy issues with his sense of self . i cant defend this at the moment but i feel it in my heart and also depending on how u look at his character i think there is canon backing

[fatuismooches]

Everyone talking about dottore and the segments turning into cats, but never into crows/ravens😞 imagine them cawing at you just to annoy you while zandy just sits on your shoulder completely unbothered

OMG SO CUTE... at first, it would be a bit unnerving to be surrounded by so many corvids looming over you, but you'd get used to it rather quickly. (After all, you've already dealt with being surrounded by a lot of Dottores.) Unfortunately, cawing right into your ear is a lot more aggravating than constant meowing. Your food also gets nabbed quite a few times from one of them swooping in out of nowhere... However, although they're resistant at first, they are still very much receptive to your, and only yours, touch. Small head pats and him nuzzling his beak into your finger. Pecks you affectionately. Threatens anyone who gets too close with less than affectionate pecks. (Pantalone, who found out about the situation, only laughs at the Harbinger's pathetic display of aggression.)

(On twt once i saw a video of a lady giving a crow a tummy rub with a pen... it reminds me of this. He starts squawking the moment you stop even though you're busy trying to find the antidote. 🙄 the audacity) You would also feel so proud the moment one of them actually lands on your stretched-out arm all majestically. Zandy though, is very small compared to the rest of the flock... he remains perched on your shoulder or on the top of your head in all instances. Poor little guy is overwhelmed by all the other segments towering over him. 😔 You end up missing how soft their feathers are but, you just go back to cuddling the black fluff Dottore always wears on his shoulder.

[catominor]

did someone say sulla and his harem of guys.

(from left to right: pompey, metellus pius, crassus, sulla, lucullus)

[commanderfreddy]

people are discoursing about the laios and shiro fight bc that was always going to happen but i do hope that wave crests quickly and we can all come to see it as what it is: literally one of the best written fights between two people who are both entirely justified in their actions and acting without any malice or cruelty of all time

[ragamine-kin]

this looked a lot better when i was still working on it but oh well

+ alt under cut

[ghouliflower]

modern dungeon meshi au where the dungeon is just a huge minecraft server that thistle runs

[mariipun]

Adventures of Wally & The Gang (plus their Caretaker)

Keep A Level Head

Warnings: None. Humor. Just more silly antics. Inspired by the anime “ Aggretsuko”.  

Word Count: 834

Brief Description: The Welcome Home cast is alive, living alongside humans. You have been contracted as their Caretaker. Our dear Caretaker has been running around all day, working hard. On top of your daily administrative work, you also have to babysit tend to the colorful ensemble of actors, plus all the other studio employees, who can’t seem to do things on their own.

[Not sure if this constitutes a WH!Muppet AU scenario?? Not sure how to tag it haha] 

“Care! Hey, hey! Care--?! Hey! Caretaker! Heeeeeeeeeey!” Julie wails, following behind as you try to ignore her and focus on the task at hand.

No matter how many times you try to address the blonde, she pulls you away from what needs to be done, to what she wants to do. It’s become a bit of an irritating habit, although you’re convinced it’s her hobby, to distract you from your job so you can entertain her grabs for attention.

“Not now Julie, I have a lot of work to do, but I promise I’ll do whatever it is you’re wanting once I’ve got more time—”

“No, I need you now. The new dress I had ordered still hasn’t arrived and I—”

You drone out her increasing insistence, beginning to pick up the pace as you swerved through the crowd of studio employees and other puppets. Unfortunately, the moment the others sight you, the choir of:

“Hey Care—”

“--need you here—”

“Can you fix—”

“Get me some—”

You stop in your tracks, feeling Julie bump into you from behind. With your binder tucked close to your chest, your hands tighten around it. The overwhelming demands from the maintenance team, stagehands, cameramen, and puppets made you fume. It was obvious from your face how feelings of annoyance had now turned into full-blown anger. You tried steadying your breath, feeling the heat prickle at your cheeks, and reminding yourself to remain professional, you need this job, it pays the bills… it pays the bills…it pays the bills….

“Hold on!” You boom, causing the voices to settle. You stand your ground, steeling yourself as you take a breath. “I am extremely busy right now—” You strain, each word slow, with brows furrowed and jaw tight. “Sooo-- I’d appreciate it if you all stop pestering me for a moment, because if I hear one more per—”

“Hey, Care?” Barnaby interjects, poking his head out of the restroom door.

Your mouth shuts, head snapping around to look at him. “What?!”

“I clogged the toilet,” Barnaby responds monotonously, thumb pointing toward inside the restroom, as water slowly began trickling its way outside.

The grip around your binder tightens even more to the point you felt like you could have ripped it in half. Your eyes narrow into a glare, tight lips twitching up into a menacing grin.

“So uh… could you fix it?” Barnaby probes, moving away from the slow leak of water pooling around his feet.

“Please excuse me for a moment…” You seethe, quickly and silently moving your way toward one of the audio control rooms, knowing the padded walls would shield your outbursts. Upon arrival, you slammed the binder down onto the script stand, causing it to wobble and tilt over.

That was the last straw.

You bring your arms up, flailing them around as you release your rage. “What the actual [redacted]?! I just need to do one [redacted] thing! One thing! But nooooooo--! I can’t catch a [redacted] break around here! And why the [redacted] would Barnaby clog the toilet?! PUPPETS DON’T EVEN NEED TO USE THE [redacted] TOILET?!”

You heaved, palming your forehead for a second before sliding your hand over your eyes. You took a few deep breaths to soothe yourself until you heard an audible click and the sound designer over the two-way speaker.

“You, uh, okay in there?”

You drop your hand down to your mouth, eyes darting open to see not only the sound designer but a few of the puppets and two other employees who followed you to your location, staring at you from behind the glass.

You stared back.

Julie had arched a brow, crossing her arms over her chest in disapproval.

Wally’s half-lidded, unwavering, eyes peered at you. “Those are some naughty words there...” He commented, his voice crackling a bit through the speaker. Though, reading his expression you could tell he was a bit amused.

“Yes dear, you really should watch your language.” Poppy chimes, as everyone else in the sound room nods in agreement.

Standing there for a moment longer, you finally gave up. Picking up your binder and setting the script stand back up in place, you walk through the door into the sound room, staying silent as Barnaby stepped toward you with a plunger in hand.

“I found this if it’ll help with the toilet—”

You didn’t say anything as you walked past him, only extending a hand, and swiping the plunger from his grasp. You moved on through the exit.

[BONUS]

Barnaby and Wally both stood outside the restroom door, peering in and watching as you muttered curses under your breath and violently plunged the toilet to unclog whatever ungodly thing Barnaby stuffed in there.

Wally: “So, uh, Barnaby?”

Barnaby: “Yeah lil’ buddy?”

Wally: “What did you put in there?”

Barnaby: “Just a bunch of leftover doughnuts from the spread table.”

Wally: “…Why?”

Barnaby, shrugging: “Wanted to see what would happen…”

[For scientific inquiry]

[luck-of-the-drawings]

THE ORDER OF PALMS An order of holy folk that serve The Helm, working to create powerful Aasimar Paladins for the purpose of protecting any who hire their help. [BACKSTORY UNDER CUT]

One day, Gjör and her peers were lead by their mentor Opheria, to a mission far from their home. On the peak of that mountain village, they saw upon the horizon, the castle of their home go up in flames. Horrified and scared, the apprentices sought to follow their mentors guidance, and followed her lead into a small barn. It was there, that Opheria proceeded to slaughter each and everyone of the apprentices. It seemed she somehow had a hand in this sudden attack on the Order of Palms. Gjör D'annevual survived a sword through the 'heart', on account of a rare condition, that places her heart on the other side of her chest. When she finally managed to bring herself back home, the Order was insulted by her survival. She had so many better peers, why couldn't any of them have survived? This runt was seriously the only thing that survived Opherias wrath? It was better to just wash their hands clean of this. Thus the Order decided to banish Gjör from their ranks. She now travels the land in search of a purpose.

[moodr1ng]

taking further weight/fatphobia/ed/general depression vents under readmore lol

cause like i cannot express how genuinely bad the fatphobia i have against myself is. like. when i picture myself in my head, in the future, i always imagine myself as skinny, bc ive lived my entire adult (and teen) life thinking of my body as a temporary impediment which ill eventually fix. early last year i thought i finally had and was so happy and then gained all the weight back. and idk what to do about it bc i have tried so so so hard to just 'accept being fat' and as i have said again i do not understand how that is possible in this society and i have never managed to get anywhere close to that and dont know how to.

and as a result of this i have considered like. every awful awful option out there for losing weight. like, i tried to get my doctor to prescribe me diet pills. i looked into ozempic and the only reason im NOT trying to illegally get some is that its for diabetic people and it harms them to take from the limited supply. i looked into various weight loss surgeries (be it bariatric surgery, which i cant get bc im not fat enough to qualify, or liposuccion but even if i could realistically afford it i hear it doesnt work in the long run). ive starved myself so much, tried so many diets, so many sports, never managed to stay on for long enough to maintain the results. no joke, i have considered developing a heroin or coke habit EXCLUSIVELY to lose weight, and the reason im not doing that is its too expensive. i complain about my adhd meds giving me food disgust but tbh every time it happens im also relieved bc it means i wont be able to eat for a few days. idk what to do anymore bc this is ruining my life and has been ruining my life for most of it.

i literally feel so worthless, ridiculous and unloveable specifically bc of my weight, and in particular the way its disposed on my body. i would be fine having fat arms, fat thighs, i would probably dig having a fat ass and chest and hips tbh! but i store all my fat on my belly and thats the one part i dont want to be fat, as well as my face and neck. this is such a massive block for me tbh. like, when i talk to new people i always feel like theyre looking down on me or find me pathetic because im fat (and bc im short which is my other major insecurity - i feel like being tall and fat is acceptable but not being short and fat). i dont take any compliments i get at face value bc i feel like everyone is just being nice by pretending like i could EVER be good looking. the only time ive ever felt attractive since i was a young teen was when i had lost the weight last year, and i couldnt maintain that bc it was so stringent.

sometimes when i think "i might be fat for the rest of my life and never manage to maintain being thin" i contemplate suicide over it. its like, the one thing about me i can never accept. i used to have so much internalized racism as a kid/young teen but i eventually got over that and came to appreciate my non-white features and even wish i had inherited more of my mothers looks (like her hair). i used to be so insecure about not being masculine enough but today im actually more into being kind of androgynous. i used to hate everything about myself and ive gotten much better about a lot of it. i dont hate my facial features or my hands or my legs or my arms anymore. i just hate my weight. and its the one thing i cant fucking get rid of.

and like, ive tried so hard to just.. look at other people ik with similar body types who i think are super attractive and think "if theyre attractive and they look like me, surely i could be too?" but it never works no matter what. and i mean, ik outside of like, societal fatphobia, a big part of it is my ed right. like obviously as long as i have an ed that is focused on wanting to lose weight im never gonna be able to accept being fat. but i cant get help for my ed bc there are no resources. and there are no medical professionals who will help me accept being fat bc theyre also fatphobic and they only want to help me lose weight, and they cant even manage to do that.

im just extremely tired of it all. every day i wish i was skinny. i can live w all the rest. i just need to be thin. i dont even need to be bone thin or whatever i just wanna be average. and its so fucking hard for so many reasons. i can almost never cook for myself bc of The Mental Shit. if i do cook for myself its rly hard to do anything complicated so its often not very balanced or healthy. and i rely so much on fast food, takeout and frozen meals bc of this inability to cook. and then theres the emotional shit - bc ever since i was little ive binged whenever i felt anything. bored? binge. angry? binge. sad? binge. happy? binge. theres no emotional state that doesnt wanna make me binge. and the only way i can stave it off is like.. either indulge in other vices (drugs alcohol etc) or just. dip into the restriction part of the ed and start starving myself again. and ofc once it becomes unbearable.. more binging. idk. idk. im at a loss. no one can help. and theres so many things piled on top of each other that make everything impossible.

im not even just talking about the weight - i mean everything in my life is like this carefully balanced tower of cards where each bad thing supports another bad thing supporting another bad thing until it builds into this massive self-sustaining network of dysfunction.

its like. i wake up in the morning (still tired from whatever the hell is wrong w my sleep, probably didnt sleep enough or too much, either way feeling bad). my room is a mess and theres fruit flies everywhere bc of the heat and i need to clean, but bc i woke up exhausted and feeling sick i have no energy to. i go get some water and theres a pile of dishes in the sink that are getting grosser and grosser but the idea of washing them is so daunting i cant bring myself to. i need to shower, but showering is such a hard task, and then if i shower i also need to brush my teeth and take care of my hair and thats so much energy. and if i do all that, well, i havent done the laundry in like 2 weeks so i have nothing clean to wear, so if im gonna shower i should do the laundry so i dont just get clean to put on dirty clothes right. and doing the laundry and hanging the stuff to dry is also such a hard task. and then if im clean and wearing clean clothes, am i just gonna get back in my dirty bed? i also need to change the bedsheets, and i hate doing that. and if im gonna change the sheets then i probably should fucking clean the bedroom, right. and i dont have the energy to do literally any of that. so im dirty, my room is dirty, my kitchen is dirty, i feel like shit, im tired, i havent eaten anything yet. maybe a decent meal would help. but a meal means cleaning some pot and pan to cook stuff in. and then it means cleaning it again after im done cooking, and also cleaning the dishes. and fucking hell i cant do that. so i think, maybe ill go to the convenience store and get a sandwich. but that means i need to get dressed and do my hair and i probably smell bed and i cant just go out like this and im SO TIRED. so i go to order takeout. and sure i could get something fresh and healthy like a poke bowl or something, but thatll cost me like 25 bucks, and i could just get a burger and fries for 10. so i get that. and i dont feel any better, because ive been eating carbs, sugar, and some shitty processed meat near-exclusively for the past several years. and im so tired and feel so awful and so guilty and so gross, so i just start smoking and drinking. maybe if im lucky ill do some art or whatever. and thats how my day goes and then ill go to sleep in my unchanged sheets unshowered laundry undone room dirty dishes piled up. have a bunch of nightmares wake up drenched in sweat etc. and do the same thing tomorrow.

and idk how to fix any of this bc its a cycle right. like where do i start? i feel like i cant do anything bc everything is SO heavy SO tiring SO daunting and im just so exhausted. i want to sleep for 10 years. i want to be happy again. but whenever im not happy i forget how it felt to be happy. so theres nothing to look forward to. and then i think about killing myself again. and thats just how it goes.

ig thats why im so so hopeful to actually get an at-home aid who can get me to do chores and get groceries and shit bc that might actually be the one thing that breaks the cycle, cause i definitely cant do it by myself.

[m0e-ru]

did you hear?

this month actually marks one year since ive started digitally painting! really super happy about this one, actually. hehe