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#so they cant stay out there too long
courfee · 11 days
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it's been exactly a year since the last chapter of Operation Walburga's Arbitrary No Kissing Ever Rule and I still miss it. This scene is probably one of my favourite things I've ever written and I've wanted to draw it for forever, so now seemed like an appropriate time
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voidedjuice · 17 days
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Songstress robot model UTA-3305, assigned to entertain guests at a high-end restaurant. Currently slowly going out of order due to lacking maintenance, and the presence of foreign biological material growing inside it.
Though it is a robot, it wishes to come to understand the human emotions it's been made to sing about all its "life". Please do entertain it with your stories while you pass by.
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deletedelight · 3 months
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DAVEKAT YURI BEAAAMM
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arataka-reigen · 2 months
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I cant focus enough to read anything lately and it is making me so depressed because last year i managed to beat my reading block, and this year i fell right back into it
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skunkes · 7 months
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the way I've been raised has shown itself in a recent awful experience I had and the realization won't leave me because I'm not sure what to do about it.
I don't like feeling anger/upset and it's rare for me to feel it anyway but it's led to me being unable to tell what's worth getting upset over anymore. If my wants upset somebody, then, well, maybe I shouldn't have them? What is so serious that I need it to go completely my way...? What desires am I allowed to have. It's not that serious, it's okay if not, you can't always get what you want....
every time I feel Upset I am later wracked with guilt because it wasn't a big deal and I was just being selfish... What IS a big deal then? How can I tell? Its admittedly never a big deal... But I keep being upset. And stepped on....
#talkys#this is what led to me Staying for as long as i did#there would be issues but if I brought them up i wld then be made to feel guilty for feeling that way#but i cant reverse that bc well!! its true like is it really a big deal? life isnt that serious I dont need to get upset...#i get upset at something my parents do and in the end i feel ungrateful and selfish#i really cant tell anymore which is why i Stayed as mentioned above#in the sense of well yeah the way im being treated doesnt make me feel good but why do i need to feel good?#isnt that selfish...isnt that asking too much...isnt that making yourself out to be Better Than...#i really dont know. i get so ready to give up my position on anything because I dont want to be selfish#and because im no better than anyone else#my mom caused some drama on my birthday wrt my sister's family and it led to me not being able to go to the duck#pond on my birthday... which is the only thing i really wanted to do on an otherwise uneventful day#i was meant to feel shame abt it because well we can always go any other day!!! relax!!!#and it is true....!#we can go any other day why did i get upset? its not that serious...nothing is that serious...i feel so guilty + spoiled + selfish#i just felt humiliated for wanting to go in the first place. and for getting upset that we couldnt go. like a toddler.#*not that i actually get Toddler Level upset...but it always Feels like i did...ykwim#i just dont understand......idk if i can Repair this....
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krynutsreal · 4 months
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thinking about ishimondo can you guys give me hcs about them like literally anything even like . mundane hcs for them idk I'm thinking about them please ...pl
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tamagotchikgs · 2 months
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i feel extra awful today n weak and i went downstairs n both my mom and my sister the first thing they said when they saw me was that i look pale o(-< whihc i dont even know how they can tell when i am literally always some form of purple
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yunwooz · 2 years
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woosang ♡ for @miinsang
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littleplantfreak · 2 months
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OH ALSO!!! what does it look like when umemiya is drunk? is he a lightweight? is he that one bf who gets clingy and needs you by his side constantly? can he usually walk home with you or do you need to support him or does he need to be carried by the other guys? so many questions that the world needs to know
I will tell the world of all I know... Oh! I'll put it under a read more just cause yea
CW: alcohol
He doesn't drink often, but when he does, he can really throw them back (beers at least). It's partially science really, since he's a big guy and a big eater. When he goes shot for shot with you though, he'll get tipsy faster depending on what you're having.
You think he's shameless with affection normally? Oh boy are you in for it. He's grabbing your face and saying the grossest, sweetest, romantic things to you in front of anyone in the room because at that point, the only thing he's really seeing is you anyways. Everything else is background noise.
The next step of drunk after that though, if he keeps drinking, is when he starts getting teary and crying about how much he loves you, and anyone around you. He's trying to text and call Kotoha, Sakura, Hiragi, whoever he remembers he can call to tell him how much he loves them. Once he gets to that point you're gonna need a car because he'll be accidentally leaning his whole weight on you leaving the bar. If it's before he gets teary, he can walk as long as you're keeping him a bit steady.
If you're walking home and he hasn't hit the crying stage of drunkenness, he tends to get a little closer and kinda bolder, being extra generous with how many smooches he gives, or whispering how pretty and hot and perfect you are in your ears. Never pushes though, just goes along with whatever you're telling him to do. "Yea baby you're sooo right!" he's hiccuping, because well, his lovey is always right aren't you? He does need to drink some water and lay down. His baby is the smartest in the whole wide world and he's sooo snuggly once you get him in bed.
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bunnyb34r · 6 months
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Always funny to me when my coworkers notice how much of a germaphobe I am when they see me wipe down my cart in the morning. I dont just wipe the handle, I wipe the top of the sides and the top part of the baby seat, places where people grab other than the handle. Then I use hand sanitizer bc by that point I've touched: the cart, the scanner locker screen and locker, my scanner (also wipe that shit down, yuck), my lock, and the spray bottle. So yucky places.
I mean hey maybe I'm not giving my immune system that boost of exposure, but I'm also not giving it covid, norovirus, or influenza from touching the cart and scanner so 🤷‍♀️
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opens-up-4-nobody · 7 months
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#its sort of funny. i think my medication is working pretty well. i feel stable in a way i never really have before#is it the dopamine stablizer or is it my ion channels? whos to say. it doesn't matter. but it also doesnt change some things#the ways i think and react negativly to change. but it makes it easier to deal with. i still experience this strange dispaire on the#weekends or anytime im not working. i think the oddest thing is thst i dont think ive ever been this consistenly sad#not in a depressed sort of way. just a passing thoughts make me tear up sort of way. it doesnt feel out of control. it just feels like a#prelude to grief i guess. bc my mum is still in the hospital and its so hard to kno what that means from halfway across the country#my sisters are both home right now. they both live within 3hrs of where we grew up. one sister lives in the city my mom goes to for#treatment. so they have the opportunity to see her more than me. i dunno if they do tho. we dont really talk. i dont kno if they're as sad#as i am. if im overreacting bc i cant physically see what's happening. what the feeling is in the room. not that she would probably complain#shes the suffer in silence type. my dad keeps texting us pics of our shitty lil sunroom that hes redoing#to make my mum a lil sanctuary. he must be sad too. its his wife. hes staying with her in the hospital rn. i dunno its so weird#when i talk to my counselor she assumes i find out info thru calls or talk to my sisters abt it and i gotta b like nah we dont really talk#i get my info thru text. i havent talked to my parents on the phone in like a month. i dunno we just dont talk. so i dont kno how to reach#out and be like yo so whats up? shoulf i plan on coming home this summer for a bit?? like???#this is the disadvantage of leaving thr place where you grew up. probably when i finish my phd i should move closer to home#somewhere in the Appalachian mountains maybe. somewere in the eastern deciduous forrest. somewhere with thunderstorms.#but thats years from now. who knows what ill b doing. for now im just sad and tired and i dont quite kno what to do in the short or long#term bc im feeling the weight of my mental limitations rather intensely. but maybe im just being self limiting#whatever. i dont have a dead mum yet. shes not even on hospice care. things are just uncertain and dont look so hot#i just dont see how it can get better from here when chemo gave her secondary blood cancer and shes still full of tumors#i dont think im being that dramatic. it just objectively seems not great for survival#unrelated
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everytime i take a tiny triangle out of the cake i made my brother comes in and cuts off a trapezium, making the cut a single clean line. it would be vaguely funny but like i made the thing and like could he not eat it all without leaving some for me
#rant#i guess#it really fucking annoys me how i have to cut off my share in everything that comes in this house ever#like always stay on alert for your food and stash away your share or its gonna be gone by morning#i dont even know why its making me frustrated enough to cry#its just. nice good food has always been a treat and motivator for me and my brother has a habit of always grabbing my share too#it sounds so silly out of context but like. ive had a lifetime of going through a bad tiring day with nothing to look forward to but#a nap and something i like to eat. and always opening the fridge to an empty container#or worse the box is there but then i get in bed with a book and open the damn thing to find half a spoonful inside.#it would be annoying once or twice but its just. all the fucking time.#i hate this survivalistic shit#its not long before i move out thank god but still#he always did it when i was young and my mom hardly ever said anything#like now if i want i can get myself some treats but when i was younger i didnt have much choice.#i havent had the time to bake in two years and prep plus baking the layer cake took two days. i put so much work in it.#and he ate half of it by the time i came back from fucking peeing. i cant even say anything because he gets fucking angry and aggressive#at the drop of a hat so im. crying in my room about it. look my feelings are not as drownable and consuming now. i generally dont#let things like that affect me too much. but i feel so young again and like the entire world is so unfair. i don't know#writing my feelings out on a tumblr blog is so much better than journalling they should recommend this shit in therapy
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strawberrysoop · 8 days
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heres the thing ok. i really like cissiecassie but to me theres just no way they actually work until theyve cycled through bffs -> dating -> exes who cant bear to speak to each other at LEAST 3-4 times. they cant keep away from each other but while theyre really young they cant compromise the way they want to live their lives for each other, so they're stuck repeating the same things over and over and over until eventually theyre like 30-35 and havent seen each other in like 6 years (after yet another breakup) and happen to meet again under entirely mundane circumstances. and THEN. finally. they can be normal about each other and have a good healthy relationship. thank you and goodnight
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skunkes · 11 months
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konfizry · 2 months
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because who's gonna vouch for her existence? who can say for sure that she is a real person who existed, say, 5 months prior to the game's events?
no one!!!!!
#like all the other party members have acquaintances (and sometimes family) that you meet#more often than not in the main plot; sometimes in a sidequest#heck even alphen who woke up from his Big Nap not too long ago has ppl in mosgul who have spent the past year with him#and like im sure if you think of any other character from the franchise#they have acquaintances that the party meets#but for shionne the only ppl we meet who know her from before are balseph and some of his goons maybe#THIS IS SO WEIRD#and like she implies(?) that she used to have a family but i guess i cant complain that theyre out of the picture#and you could argue “well thats the point. shes always been alone so naturally youre not gonna meet her buddies she doesnt have any”#i would argue that they stiĺ could have made a subquest where you meet a couple doctors/researchers who used to “care for” her#or a rando on lenegis who tells you how he once bumped into shionne as a kid and the memory forever remains with him bc it was#the worst pain hed felt in his life and omg is that her with you right now stay back stay back aaà aaaaa aaa#Like they dont even let you meet her doll#she refers to it as her only friend gdi#regardless of whether thats also alphens doll. can we see it?#can we come in contact with one thing that cements shionne's presence in this universe prior to the events of the game?#no????#all that coupled with the fact that the logistics of her arrival on dahna are such a headscratcher that fans had to ask tomizawa about it#and he refused to answer lmao#IM LOSING MY MIND GIVE SUBSTANCE TO THIS GIRL'S BACKSTORY BLEASE#arise curse#(not to mention that balseph and shionne' relationship is strictly Tom&Jerry-esque.#and it's impossible to parse for how long exactly he's know (of?) her)#(at least the few words they exchange pre-battle are still somewhat engaging and inform us on like. the Renan worldview. cool.)#shionne posting
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toastsnaffler · 4 months
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I slept rly deeply last night even tho it took me a while to get to sleep but I think that was bc I had acid reflux and I'd been playing videogames too late not anything else.... still only got 6 hrs but doing pretty okay all things considered 😚
#and not feeling sick this morning so im sticking w the higher dose for one more day. my heart rate does feel a little uncomfortably fast#but its tolerable. just gonna make notes of how it goes through the day and ill submit my review form to my dr this evening#and hopefully she'll give me the green light to drop back down instead of continuing to titrate up#this is making me think of those heartrate fetishists... do u think i could make money selling tachycardic heart recordings online#i do wanna try to exercise this morning while i have energy. might take the bike out it looks like a gorgeously sunny day#maybe ill try to map my cycle route to work so i can consider cycling there instead of taking the bus in a couple weeks..#i cant atm thp cuz they have scaffolding up and its blocked off the bike racks sadly 😔#i think making myself eat + drink as much as i can has helped control the nausea too. just need a lot of fuel to process meds properly ig#and a lot of sleep.. its a bit stressful to think abt how rigid im going to have to be abt my daily routines if i want to stay medicated#but to be honest i have a pretty rock solid sleep/meal routine already bc its the only way i can function with the hours i work#so like. i dont rly need to worry too much. i think i reacted badly the first couple days bc my base anxiety was high#and then bc that feeling was heightened by meds -> made me not eat/sleep properly -> knock on sickness the next day#but yeah still the side effects arent very nice and i dont wanna take the risk of it exacerbating every difficult emotion i deal with#but fingers crossed bc 30 worked rly nice for me and i had barely any side effects so hopefully i can settle w that long term 🤞#we will see....#ANYWAY. sorry for making the same post over and over the last couple days. talking abt it on here has helped me feel a lot calmer#i dont wanna bother ppl irl w every thought and physical symptom i experience hourly. but this is my blog i can do what i want#hope everyone else has a nice sunday <3#.diaries
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