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#so very 2000s though. so very painfully 2000s
murdrdocs · 11 months
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rocketeer | a. warlock
description. a peek into your budding relationship with adam warlock, soundtracked by the music that follows you through your life
includes. straight fluff that's it, some references to tunes
a/n: playing around with adam as a character .. reader implied to be from earth, also this was a blurb but its long enough to be a mini fic so ,,, that's what it is now. also title is a reference to rocket tehe
word count: 1.2k+
mild gotg3 spoilers!!!
you meet him when rocket's 2000s playlist is playing.
there a general joy spread all across knowhere, each and every being there filled with the adrenaline of the guardians surviving, and saving others along the way, once again. everyone's doing something; dancing, crying, rejoicing, picking up pieces. everyone except him.
he sits on a set of stairs that you know has been coated with bile too many times. he's alone, wrapped in an insulated blanket, and staring at everyone with a sense of longing. your rhythmic steps falter, as does your smile, and your head tilts.
your friend asks what's wrong, you point him out, and his mind is lightyears away because he doesn't notice the obvious gawking from three sets (the extra set your friend has will always be a little off putting for you) of curious eyes. he doesn't notice anything until you're standing above him.
"hi," your wave is just a flare of your hand, small, gentle, as is your smile. his eyes snap up to look at you, wide and yellow and intriguing. it takes him a second but he speaks, although it's quiet and a little hard to hear over florence and the machine.
"salutations."
the formality of it makes your smile widen. "d'you mind if i sit?" you point to the empty space next to him, his gaze following your gesture, and then he's looking back at you with furrowed eyebrows.
"why?"
you shrug, suddenly feeling a little silly, but you suck the feeling down with a large gulp of air. "just cause you seemed a little lonely. loneliness isn't really a thing here on knowhere."
his yellow eyes seem to light up at that. "really?"
not exactly, but you still nod. "really."
he scoots over a smidge to make room for you, even though there's more than enough, and you sit beside him, choosing to ignore the lingering stench of alcohol-induced barf. it's silent for a second, dog days are over ends and seven nation army begins, and then he speaks again.
"i'm adam."
you introduce yourself, starting to notice the way his foot taps along to the bass line. you nod towards the small movement. "you like this sort of music?"
when he shrugs, you can feel the blanket move against your arm and you hadn't realized you two were sitting that close beforehand.
"i don't really know much about music."
"yeah, that'll change here on knowhere, too."
you get closer while rocket is in a 90s kick. there's destiny's child, red hot chili peppers, loads of nirvana, and blur to soundtrack the timidity in the beginning. small "hello"s shared in passing, glances that turn into staring whenever the other isn't looking. talks about meaningless things that are happening on knowhere, just as an excuse to talk to each other at all.
your relationship (lack thereof) with adam feels reminiscent on those movies you would watch back home, telling stories of a boy next door and a girl next door and a painfully slow romance filled with moments that you used to wish would just lead into the big thing.
before he leaves, quill gives you a final word of advice. "stop dancing around it. go for it."
you follow his eye line to adam, who's holding a very confusing looking conversation with one of the kids, and then you look at quill, who's staring down at you like an older, slightly wiser, brother.
"okay?"
"yeah. okay."
he opens up when his favorites are playing. you're teasing him, asking if he finally has artists, genres, songs, anything that he likes. he smiles brightly, like he's been waiting to share this information, and nods eagerly.
"let me show you." the ipod he'd acquired is thrust into your hands and then one end of the flimsy earphones after it. you slip the bud in, listening to the clicks of adam searching for what he wants to show you, and the it starts.
you vaguely recognize it as something that quill passed down to rocket, who tried to pass it down to you, but you don't know it well enough to predict the lyrics before they happen.
the other headphone is placed in one of adam's ears, and he hums to the song. you feel his gaze on yours, waiting for your reaction, and you look to him and smile.
"yeah?" he asks, clearly wanting to know what you thought about it.
"yeah. it's good!"
"right!" and he continues to hum along to the song, clearly wanting to sing it at the top of his lungs and dance around to the beat. the image of what that would look like, of how he would ask you to join in, takes over your mind and adam's voice breaks you from your thought.
"i have just one question though."
"hm?"
"what's disney world?"
and now it's time for your eyes to widen and for you to gasp. you launch into descriptions of 'the happiest place on earth', having to will yourself from telling the entire backstory of the creator and the mystery that exists from his extremely known life. adam seems confused, interested, and like he longs for something like that.
"d'you think we could visit disney world one day?" the odds aren't the best, but you shrug, nod, let the corner of your mouth turn down just a little.
"yeah, maybe."
another solo song by adrian belew starts and then adam tells you about his home, and the sovereign, and his mother. you listen, lowering the volume so you can hear him clearly, and you're there for when tears start to glide down his face.
things change whenever 80s pop is playing.
kraglin had taken over rocket's ipod for the day, resulting in almost every hit from the 80s to play during the entire day.
you'd sung along to most songs, wishing you'd seen adam to tell him about each artist that played. but he'd been gone, not seen by anyone, and you assumed that he'd gone on a mission or something of the sort.
it's late, you're snuggled in bed, the music outside has come to an end but you have your own headphones in to continue listening. wham! plays when there's a knock on your door and you pull down the headphones, lowering george's singing, to open it.
adam stands on the other side, dressed as casual as you've seen him, and his hair sticking up in different places as if he's been messing with it for a while. he looks distressed, and distracted, until you say his name.
"adam? what's wrong?"
and then his large hands are delicately holding your cheeks and his lips are pressed to yours. he freezes with the initial contact, most likely due to a mix of inexperience and shock, but then you start to slowly move your lips against his and he takes the hint to follow your lead. your hands pull at his shirt, urging him to come into your room, and he does as told, kicking the door closed behind him with his foot, giving you a surface that doesn't imply too much to push your back against.
that night, the entire first two albums from wham! play from your headphones while adam kisses you, leaving you to giddily listen to last christmas when you bid him goodbye, his lips a little swollen and a darker hue to his golden cheeks.
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Underneath It All
Paring: JJ Maybank x KookFem!reader
Warnings:  18+ Smut. Oral (w receiving) PIV, Fluff, Romance, JJ’s got a dirty mouth. (Slight Angst, Slight Dub Con - if you squint) Not Proof-Read.
Summary:  JJ wants more than a casual hook up.
Word Count: 2000 words
Your media consumption is your own responsibility.  
Fine Print: Steal my writing or copy bits and karma will get ya.
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“You know, you weren’t my type,” JJ whispered.
"Wh-what?" you stammered. Scrunching your nose at the sudden change in topic, you wondered what drove him to switch from talking about Rafe to well- you.
"You just- weren't."
"Oh—" And then it clicked. He wanted you to respond with ‘and what about now?', opening the door to a conversation you were not willing to have.
It was not that you did not want to. But there was too much animosity between your friends and his; too much of a painful history for any sort of healthy relationship to form between you and JJ. Each time you spoke, it always came back to something one of your friends had done or said. Toxic messes with no end or resolution in sight. Wasn't this the very reason JJ climbed the tall trellis against the side of your home and into your bedroom window in the first place?  To tell you about some shit Rafe had done and why Rafe had more coming to him than a bloody nose and a cut lip?
But there was another reason. Your mind chided, and you baulk under the weight of the truth.  It is for this unspoken reason that JJ showed up at your house in the dead of night while your parents slept soundly down the hall. Why even as he spoke, his gaze unapologetically swept across every inch of your body, only for your core to clench with anticipation. But you didn’t want to dwell on that. You couldn’t dwell on that. Nothing good could ever come from that.  So you narrowed your eyes at him in a futile attempt to get the conversation about Rafe back on track and hopefully send him back the way he came.
"It's fine.  You’re not mine," you shrugged though your heart clenched.  You watched JJ’s eyebrow hitch in response, his fingers twitch at his side.  Folding your arms across your chest you forced yourself to continue. "I’m not into blondes," you said with haughty resignation.
“Is that right?” JJ chuckled, dimpled cheeks on full display. It gave him a boyish charm if it weren't for his teeth, which appeared white and wolf-like in the moonlight. His blue eyes flickered down at your lips as he licked his own.  It made his intentions painfully obvious.
"That’s right…" you swallowed as he inched closer, "..and I don’t. Fuck. Pogues.”
JJ lunged forward, lips crashing onto yours in a brutal kiss.  His ringed fingers grabbed your neck and pulled you close, enslaving you to his sensual assault of teeth and lips. Your knees buckled when his tongue entered your mouth, despite your efforts to resist. While his fingers slipped down your body to your ass, kneading the soft supple flesh covered in silk.   Growling into your mouth, JJ pulled you closer, grinding your core against his stiffening cock. The action makes you instantly wet much to your chagrin.  
Pulling away from the kiss, JJ scraped his teeth along the shell of your ear, his voice on edge as he spoke. “Don’t fuck pogues, huh? Funny since you didn’t mind bouncin' on my dick when that asshole dumped you. Ain’t that right cupcake?” His vulgar words made your stomach churn in disdain and you tried to push him off, but his hands wound their way around your waist. JJ pulled you towards him until your lower halves bumped, then backed you towards your bed and pushed you down onto it.
“That was a mistake. A moment of weakness JJ and you know it.” You said, scrambling backwards on your elbows to put distance between the two of you.  JJ grabbed your right ankle and yanked you towards him.
“It was a mistake JJ…a moment of weakness JJ…” he mimicked, high-pitched and shrilly. “That's cute, princess. Real cute.” he drawled, as he climbed on top of you. With those piercing blue eyes staring down at you from a halo of wispy blonde hair, he looked like an angel but something about his expression reminded you of Lucifer too.
In the seconds that followed, a silent conversation ensued filled with emotions you could not articulate: uncertainty, lust, fear. It seemed JJ understood because his eyes softened immediately and an unspoken understanding passed between the two of you. He suddenly seemed different; unusually calm compared to the chaotic energy he usually exuded. 
JJ had switched tactics.
“That night in your dad's office while everyone watched fireworks outside..." he said softly, his fingers slowly undoing each button of your silk pyjama shirt. Normally, he would have eagerly ripped them open with fervor and passion but, tonight, his actions were languid and gentle. You felt you could stop him if you truly wanted to. 
You remembered the night in question. It was your dad's 60th birthday party which had been a grand occasion; many of the Outer Banks' elite gathered under the stars to celebrate. Your parents had hired a catering company and JJ was one of its servers. 
You gasped as he exposed your naked chest to the cool night air, bringing you back to reality. He slowly leaned down tongue trailing along the side of your rib cage. 
“Was that night a mistake too?" His eyes flashing up at you as he latched onto your nipple with fervor. 
You were immediately swept away as JJ sucked, pulled, and tugged hungrily at your tender flesh. Your other bud was deliciously teased by his nimble fingers while images of that night and JJ holding you down against your father's desk as he pounded you senseless came rushing back. Just thinking about it made you giddy, your fingertips gently gliding into his blonde strands.   
Slowly, he kissed down your chest to your silk-covered core, your body humming with need as he buried his face and breathed you in.
"Where were your kook morals when I fucked you at midsummer, huh?" he asked while hooking his fingers into the band of your silk shorts and panties. Clearly, you didn’t have any because you were now lifting your hips for JJ while he dragged them down your legs and off.  He flung them aimlessly behind him, before his lips pressed soft kisses on your stomach and hips.
“Or that night under the stars while your friends partied by the bonfire?”  He looked up at you, pupils blown “Don’t think I've ever told you this, but that night is one of my favorites. You just kept riding me,  an’ riding me, an’ riding me...” he whispered eyes rolling at the sinful thought  “You made me cum so fuckin' hard I nearly passed out. Do you remember?" 
That night was one of your favorites too. Your friends were down by the beach and you had snuck off to be with JJ on higher ground. The sand dunes provided the perfect spot to pull him down on the white sand and climb on top of him. It was also the first time you had decided to not use condoms since starting the pill a week prior.
You remembered JJ lying beneath you while you fucked yourself on his dick. His hands slid up and down your body touching every part he could reach until they landed on your hips where they stayed.
You rode him for what felt like forever. Slow desperate circles that had you moaning and gasping. The lack of a condom taking both of your pleasure to dizzying heights since you could feel everything. Your eyes never left his handsome face as you watched his expression shift from horny to on the edge of exploding.
When JJ finally came, you had never seen him cum like that before. His eyes rolled to the back of his head, his teeth bared as he whimpered your name like a hedonistic prayer. Watching him become vulnerable and losing control like that had you careening into an orgasm of your own.  Your could barely hold on but you kept riding him as you wrung out every last ounce of pleasure. It was only when he brokenly confessed “God, I love fucking you. I love... I love being with you” did you finally climb off him Bambi-legged, with his cum dripping down your thighs.
You nodded at the sinful memory, biting your bottom lip, and JJ chuckled. "Yeah, I knew you'd remember" Pushing your legs apart, he wrapped his arms around your legs, his face close to your weeping core.
"Don't fuck pogues, but your legs are always open for me, hm?" he breathed, his tongue darting out to taste the nectar pooling at your slit. A satisfied hum bubbled from his throat. “Always eager... wet... an’ sweet”. JJ purred before burying his tongue deep in your cunt.
"Oh, Fuck! J-" you gasped, your fingers tangling in his hair as you bucked underneath him, seeking more friction. JJ’s tongue danced along your clit.  Using two fingers he spread your petals apart, your pearl on display for him. You let out a sharp cry when he suckled it,  toes curling, your head spun from the excessive stimulation.  JJ sucked greedily, lapping at your sweet nectar until your clit throbbed from being so thoroughly mouthed.
"Nah uh, can’t come yet, princess" he murmured, as he flicked your clit with his tongue, "Can’t come til I tell you to." His voice was guttural; his words dripping with lust that left you shaking with need.  You moaned again, tilting your hips up against JJ's prodding tongue until you forgot who and where you were.   Your whole body quaking with the insatiable need to cum.
You ran your fingers through JJ’s silky hair and grabbed the back of his neck with both hands.  With your head tilted back on the pillows, desperately you had spread your legs as wide as you possibly can, your toes pointed towards the ceiling. It had him right where you needed him most. Your stomach clenched, not able to get enough air or leverage to do much other than gulp and gasp for breath. You felt like you were a dying star about to be reborn.
JJ sank his fingers deep into your soaked pussy and you lost it. The sound of your cry reverberated throughout your bedroom. Unbridled and loud. Holding down your bucking hips JJ continued to suck your swollen bud as he finger-fucked every last ounce of ecstasy from your pulsing core.
“Can’t even follow simple instructions, hm? You bad girl...” JJ laughed breathlessly, as he crawled up your body leaving a trail of wet kisses along his path.  Reeling from your orgasm, you didn't even notice JJ had taken off his t-shirt or that he was now on top of you.  You sighed as he kissed you passionately, and you moaned at the taste of yourself on his tongue. His fingers worked his belt and unzipped his fly.  He pulled his cock out, the mushroom tip flared and sticky with precum.
“But ’s okay… ” JJ breathed, and he wasted no time pushing his thick cock past your soaked petals, his lips brushing your neck with a sigh.  “You needed it, huh baby? I get it. It’s the same way I’ve been needin’ to fuck you all week.  It’s all I could think about... I’ve missed you. Did you miss me too?” He pushed deeper and you cried out, perhaps in response to his question. JJ’s hand flew over your mouth to stop the sound from escaping.
“Ah ah, shh--” he smiled, dimples pronounced, lips ghosting your ear.  “What would your parents say, hm? What’d they say if they caught their princess takin’ my pogue dick?” But even as he said those words JJ pushed harder into you until his entire length filled you to the hilt.  A long sigh escaped you as he began to rock his hips gently.
"Gotta keep quiet for me, baby...” JJ moaned, kissing you along your collarbone.  “Gotta keep quiet while I fuck you... Can you do that for me?” 
You shook your head ‘no’ and JJ breathed out a laugh.  “I know baby, I know its hard but you gotta try, you gotta try...” It was easier said than done with the feel of JJ grinding his hips, his thick cock impossibly deep in you.  A low keening sound escaped your lips as you wrapped your arms around him, holding him close to your chest. His skin felt hot yet smooth like marble beneath your hands and it sent a shiver up your spine when he tightened his hold and nipped at your neck with his teeth.
His pace quickened after those few gentle thrusts.  He took in deep gulps of air, his breath brushed across your cheek. "You feel soo good.. fuckin’ tight... always chokin’ me--” he whispered, his voice trailing off into incoherent words and moans while his hips picked up their rhythm making you sob into the palm of his hand.  This is what you wanted, what you needed, so desperately. The pleasure, the pain, everything only JJ could give you.
"Fuck, ’m close, baby. So close. Gonna cum-” JJ groaned against your ear, “Can I- in you?" he whispered between shallow pants. You knew what he was asking for, what he needed and you shook your head ‘yes’. Your fingertips embedded into the flesh of his back as you clung to him for dear life.
Leaning into his hand at your mouth, JJ drove himself forcefully into you as if trying to hammer home how good it felt filling you. So fucking gone you didn't care about the noise, you didn't care about your bed frame hitting the wall.  Because with every pound of your heart, every rush of blood to your core, every sharp burst of light behind your closed eyelids, and the stroke of his cock hitting that spot deep within, your orgasm approached quicker and harder than ever before. The buildup was almost too much to bear and you clawed at JJ’s back for purchase.
"God- Ah! J-" you sobbed, biting down on JJ's palm as your whole body convulsed from the force of your orgasm. JJ pulled out slowly until just his tip remained, then slammed back into you violently. He did it once, twice, three times -  a primal groan left his lips as his body stiffened above you, cock twitching as he painted your womb with his cum. He shuddered, gasping harshly against your ear, whispering brokenly the words ‘yes, fuck--’ and ‘mine’ 
After several minutes of panting, JJ gently removed his hand from your mouth and his lips came to meet yours. His face was full of love as he lazily stroked your cheeks and lips. 
"You weren't my type because I didn't think a girl like you would ever want someone like me," JJ admitted softly. "But, I know the truth and  I’m done pretending what we have isn’t real. You can’t keep runnin' away from this Y/N..." he whispered, eyes burning into your own. "You can't keep runnin' from me." 
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kaciidubs · 9 months
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Camboy!SKZ Headcanons | Hyung Line
❣ Summary: What it would be like if the SKZ boys were camboys? An idea brought on by @onmykneesforchanlix ❣ ❣ Warnings: Camboy AU, kink discussion [daddy kink], sex toys ❣ ❣ Additional Tags: Slight crack energy, Chan is referred to as Chris, Changbin is a gym buff ❣ Maknae Line ❣ Stray Kids Masterlist ❣ General Masterlist ❣
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Chris
His username would be something painfully simple, like cb97xx or xxWolfChanxx, he’s never escaping the early 2000’s username tropes, I’m sorry.
Started camming to save money for music tech, and he was gonna quit once he earned enough money but he slowly found himself getting hooked on the praise of thousands of unknown faces.
At first he didn’t show his face, keeping the content to shoulders and below, but one night he gets up to turn the stream off and they catch a glimpse of his lips and there’s a rapid fire of tips flooding in;
Would give anything to have those lips on me
What the fuck what the fuck??? Those lips?? So biteable??
Bubblegum pink, new favorite color
From then on, he kept his camera at an angle just high enough to keep his lips in frame.
Definitely finds himself pandering to the daddy kink side of the internet and ends up developing the kink for himself [this is a lie, he knows he’s had it since before the cam boy streams, but who really needs to know that?].
Loves when his fans comment on how good his hands look bc he doesn’t find them appealing himself, but if hundreds of people are begging him to choke them, how could he deny it?
Paints his nails by the recommendation of his subscribers each month, and it turns him on even more when he’s camming and jerking off with his freshly dried polish.
Wants to grow his community and isn’t shy about collaborations with other creators because baby boy is just a social butterfly - no matter if they’re clothed or naked in front of thousands.
Ultimately treats his lives like a genuine livestream, even if his dick is leaking precum in his fist.
Minho
First off; username is leeknowswho, convince me otherwise - man did not care about his username in the slightest
Only made an account to support his other streaming friend, quokkasungie
But when he saw the money he was raking in, he decided to throw his hat into the ring because “Getting off in front of a camera? How hard can it be?”
Spoiler alert - very.
Extremely, when you don’t even use a webcam.
The first few streams were experimental, a black screen with the subtle sound of him jerking off and breathing into the mic - that is, until he read out a chat asking for a description.
“What? So needy you can’t imagine it for yourself?”
Apparently the chatter liked that, and so did a grand number of people after that on his next stream.
Thus, the leeknowswho degradation corner was born, and it’s been a hit for two years and growing.
Constantly teases his viewers, toying with them that maybe one day he’ll turn on his camera, and even going as far as setting a donation goal for him to do so - but the limit is never reached since he often takes part of the money to donate to charities.
“You’d rather see my dick than an organization help get stray kittens off the streets? Yet I’m the fucked up one?”
Sometimes he goes live and doesn’t even jerk off, just doing an asmr stream teasing and degrading and toying with his fans, getting a kick out of the ones actively using his voice to get themselves off.
He’s a menace but the people love him.
Changbin
BinnieDwekki or Dwekkisgym, I really can’t decide but he definitely gives off cute username vibes.
Genuinely wanted to use the platform as a way to document his growth from working out, but of course using a camboy website probably wasn’t the way to go about it.
Has a whole room for his setup - though in reality it’s just his in-home workout room, but who really needs to know the truth - and takes pride in showing off his whole body.
He worked hard for those muscles, why wouldn’t he want to flex in every angle?!
Blushes at the chat messages where people say they want him to choke him with his biceps, or squeeze their head between his thighs until they pop like a watermelon.
Blushes even more at the chats praising his physique and wondering how someone with such a cute face could have such a killer body.
The first time he pulled his dick out on stream was when he was showcasing some of the workouts he does on the daily; the adrenaline and built up energy from his preworkout giving the chat a glorious reveal of the thick outline in his compression shorts.
Fuck choking me with your arms, choke me out on your cock
There wasn’t much left to the imagination, and with the addition of that chat message he figured that maybe taking care of the problem on stream wouldn’t be a bad idea.
And boy, was it the best decision he’d ever made.
If his fans weren’t on board for the strained grunts and breathless groans from him working out on camera, then they definitely were for the dick that looked just as beefy as he was.
His version of being a camboy is probably the most wholesome out there, ranging from motivational talks and advice moments [while shirtless, of course] to being stark naked and jacking off after a live workout session.
Hyunjin
Another one who signed up with intent - and hear me out.
He wanted to use the money to help get him into art school, but after seeing his first major check after the span of a few months, he figured he could get on well without it.
Username is princehhj, he knows how to pander to his features which helped him grow a fanbase like it was nothing.
Has been camboying the longest out of the hyung line.
He also has a set for his streams, but it’s just a corner of his art studio where he has a cozy little couch where he can stretch out on [in more ways than one].
His streams usually involve toys of various types; silicon grinders, fleshlights, buttplugs, dildos - his collection isn’t one to joke about, only using his hand got boring after the first week of streaming.
Most of the time he doesn’t even have to be doing anything explicit, simply sitting there with his pretty black hair tied back into a ponytail, a bottle of lube and a toy or two sitting right beside him is enough for the donations to come rolling in.
His favorite toy to use is his tenga egg - the stretchy plastic egg fits perfectly in his palm and doesn’t take too much concentration to use, which makes it easier for him to read his chat and reply as if he’s not touching himself.
Aside from the toys, however, he may also have one or two sets of lingerie that he brings out on milestone streams as a treat to the scream [and himself]. Nothing too wild, just your simple lace panty set and garters, and the chat goes wild for it.
Can you truly blame them though? He’s the prettiest prince out there.
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❣ Any type of feedback is appreciated! Whether it be a simple like, reblog, or keyboard smash and the most essay-like comment, feel free to share your thoughts. ❣
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recurring-polynya · 1 month
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Writing/Art Update 2.20.2024
Well, I had another very solid week. I hesitate to call it good, because I didn't actually enjoy it very much, but I did grind out 8,642 words last week. I finished Chapter 8 and made a solid dent in Chapter 9a. Basically, I just tried to write at least a thousand words a day, which I accomplished almost every day. Yesterday, I only did 800, but I did 2000 on Sunday, plus the 800 was the ending scene for the chapter, so I deserve a little grace there. And it was a three-day weekend for my kids!
I am at the stage of the fanfic where most of the ambiguity is gone--I know what scenes are left and I just gotta write them. It doesn't matter if I want to or not, the fanfic isn't going to be done until I write them, so I just do it. I always worry that writing in this mindset is going to produce bad, unlovable writing--like, if I don't love writing this, how is anyone going to love reading it? Historically, though, that doesn't bear out--big chunks of Call Me Back and What We Do with Our Hearts were written in this exact fugue state, and I often end up loving them after the fact, and they still contain parts that are really funny or insightful or heartfelt or whatever. I literally do not know how this is possible, it just is. Also, like: there is going to be editing. It is truly astonishing how hard it is to slap anything at all down on a page and then how easy it is to shape it up into something good later on. It is a lot like throwing flat colors down on a piece of art and then adding a little texture and shading later.
The other thing I don't like about writing in this mode is that it makes me actually insane, which I don't like. I just roll word counts and percentages around in my head 24 hours a day and I'm not really able to relax and do things that are not grinding away at my writing. I can do it for short periods of time, but I think I have too much of this story left to tough it through, plus, like, what's the point? This is the thing I allegedly do for fun, and even though I really really really want to be finished, I feel like I should actually try to enjoy the process a little, at least.
So anyway! My first goal for this week is to be less insane about my fanfic. My second goal is to finish Chapter 9a (I think I have about 3-4k to go). My third goal is to edit Chapters 7 and 8 and send them to the beta.
After that, I'll just have 9b (of which I've already written about 4k) and the epilogue to do. After that, of course, there's still more editing, a beta pass for chapters 8->the end, and then I may try to read the whole thing through again from the beginning. So, 3 weeks, maybe, give or take a little?
In the interest of trying to have a little fun, I think I'm gonna try to post some previews for the next couple weeks? In the past, people have enjoyed previews. Today's is a little long, but it's the opening to the whole thing. It's below a cut for those who'd rather wait until the whole thing comes out.
“I don’t know if they’re trying to capitalize on Boy’s Day, or what,” Rukia said, idly inching her hand toward the plate of hot, steaming gyoza sitting on the countertop next to Renji’s stove, “but they’re having some sort of Seafood Festival out in East Sixth.”
A dish towel appeared out of nowhere, the tip whipping painfully against Rukia’s hand.
“Ow!” Rukia howled.
“They’re hot! It’ll hurt worse if you jam one of those in your mouth whole like I know you were gonna,” Renji replied, stuffing the dish towel back into his obi, and juggling the pan of gyoza he was currently frying. “What about a Seafood Festival? Why the Hell is the East Sixth having a Seafood Festival?”
“It’s being put on by the Train Museum, I hear,” Rukia continued grumpily, rubbing at her hand. “I guess they’re hauling a bunch of spring fish up from the Shiranui Sea at the other end of the line. It only takes a few hours to get out to Six. There’s probably carts making the run that we could take, but I would honestly just flash-step, at least on the way out. I want to eat my own body weight in katsuo. Possibly your body weight in katsuo.”
“Mmm,” Renji replied noncommittally, dumping the rest of his gyoza onto the plate and turning off the stovetop.
“I was thinking of asking Hisagi if he wanted us to take some pictures and do a little write-up for the Bulletin,” Rukia went on. “Get us a little walking-around money.” Not that Rukia lacked for pocket money, but it was a little more expensive than their usual weekend activities, and Renji got a little cagey when she tried to treat him to things.
“That’s a bad idea.”
“Why? We had fun the last time we played reporter!”
“Grab the bowl of sauce, would you?” Renji gestured with his chin as he picked up the plate of dumplings and the teapot to carry them to the table. “Don’t you remember when they built that damn train line? Took ‘em over over thirty years, and there were three to four articles every single Bulletin about the delays, the graft, the politics, the environmental impact, whatever. People got so mad about the idea of a train inside the Seireitei that it doesn’t even go anywhere useful. I didn’t even know they used it for anything aside from twee holidays for bored nobles.”
“I heard a story from my friend, Lady Akizuki, that the old head of the Seshimo clan actually lives on the train! He hasn’t set foot outside it in fifteen years!”
Renji cocked an eyebrow at her. He looked like he desperately wanted to hear about the Train Noble, but also did not want to be a guy who cared about Train Nobles. “Anyway, don’t mention the train to Hisagi unless you got six or seven hours to kill. Preferably when I’m not there.”
Rukia picked up the big, fragrant bowl of ginger dipping sauce with both hands. “It was just an idea. So what do you think? Do you want to go?”
“When is it again?” Renji asked, frowning.
“It’s running for all of May, but the weather has been so nice lately, I thought maybe we could go next weekend,” Rukia suggested. 
Renji was quiet for a moment, but Rukia figured that maybe he was just focused on serving her dumplings, which was, in her opinion, very important. 
“Ru,” he finally said slowly, as he poured her a cup of tea. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
“Is it that you want to go to the Seafood Festival with me?”
Renji took a big breath through his nose and let it out again. “If things work out, I’d love to go later in the month. Next weekend’s not gonna work, though.”
“Oh.” Rukia frowned. “That’s fine. That’s no big deal.” She looked down lovingly at her gyoza and then up at Renji hopefully. “Itadakimasu?” she asked hopefully.
Renji blinked. “Huh? Oh, yeah, please help yourself. That… that wasn’t the thing I had to say.”
“Well, spit it out, already,” Rukia groused, her mouth already crammed with gyoza. “Why are you being weird?”
Renji still hadn’t touched his own food. He had circled his right wrist with the thumb and middle finger of his left hand and was rotating it back and forth. He used to make that gesture a lot when he was young, and Rukia realized that she hadn’t seen him do it in years.
“I’m having some surgery,” Renji finally said. 
Rukia froze. After a long moment, she slowly finished chewing her dumpling and swallowed it. “Are you okay? What’s going on?”
“I’m getting my arm fixed.”
Rukia watched him rub his wrist for another few seconds. “Did it not heal correctly after the, um, accident?” “The accident” was when Byakuya had stabbed him through the forearm during a demonstration fight the week prior. Everyone was being very polite about it.
“Wellll…” Renji drew out. “I mean, no, that healed up fine. Very clean cut, Senbonzakura, as always. But, uh, while I was at the Fourth, the topic of my burnt-out kidou ducts came up. Captain Unohana thinks she can fix ‘em. And I’ve decided to, um, let her try.” “Oh,” said Rukia. Her chest was filling up with a lot of strange feelings. “Oh.”
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sug4rsweet · 4 months
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[ KIMBERLEY ♡ THE PRE-DEBUT SINGLE ALBUM ]
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— KIMBERLEY is the first PRE-DEBUT single album by KIMBERLEY TAKAHASHI, released by DISNEY and HOLLYWOOD RECORDS on october 9th, 2009. although not selling as much as expected, the album was still quite the success, selling a little over 90,000 copies in its first week. the lack of promotions have made KIMBERLEY a largely unremarkable record among most fans, and it fell into obscurity only months after it was released. as a result, no one—not even KAORI herself—considers this as her actual debut. additionally, it was also meant to precede a full album that would serve as her debut, but due to internal conflicts, the album in question was eventually shelved completely and its release was canceled. however, some demos from it still exist.
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— TRACKLIST !
TRUTH OR DARE ! LEAD SINGLE
INVITATION ! B-SIDE
HAPPILY NEVER AFTER
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— SONG TRIVIA !
the lead single “TRUTH OR DARE” was initially for the SHAKE IT UP soundtrack, which was still in development at the time of the track’s recording. executives decided to have kaori record other tracks for the show, and chose to save “TRUTH OR DARE” for something else, which ended up being kaori’s debut single
“HAPPILY NEVER AFTER” was the opening for a DISNEY CHANNEL ORIGINAL MOVIE that kaori had starred in, which premiered a few months prior to the release of KIMBERLEY. the track was recorded in early 2009—shortly after filming for the movie wrapped—and it was recorded specifically for the film
“INVITATION” was the only track on KIMBERLEY that was recorded specifically for the album
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— STYLING !
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this is painfully late 2000s but you can kinda get it !
you can tell that the styling for this era was a precursor to what we would get 3 years later, as in it had a lot of kaori’s personal style incorporated into it !
back then, she was less gyaru and more scene, and it really showed
lots of skirts, bright colored leggings, doc marten’s, plaid prints, ruffles, ripped stockings, colored hoop earrings, jeans, belts, rock elements, layered shirts, fingerless gloves, the occasional hair bow, etc !
and this was the start of her signature highlights ! bright and chunky ofc sjiwjsj
disney obviously had a stylist for kaori to keep up with that “tween, scene avril lavigne” image they had going for her, but she def had a hand in a few things !
like if she’s appealing to tween girls, then ofc the tween girl in question would know what her audience wants !
and speaking of tween girls, they ate this styling UP,, like kaori was brightly colored and a lil girly but she was also cool and tomboyish ! like kaori’s look truly appealed to everyone
even though this album wasn’t the major smash hit that disney thought it would be, kaori still caused a micro trend ! like there were quite a few girls dying their hair to make it resemble kaori’s and wearing lil hair bows wkjsjsiwijs
kaori’s makeup was pretty minimal this era,, like they mainly used bright eyeshadow, glitter, a few rhinestones, and maybe some lipgloss but that was it SKIWJSJ like she was literally 14
but still ! very cute and it was def the “baby version” of her makeup during her debut era
all in all dated but adorable ! we love a mini scene queen !
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— ERA HIGHLIGHTS !
oh girl this album’s promotions lasted like 3 seconds BSMJSKS
in september, kaori announced on her myspace that she was releasing a single album, and ofc her fans were elated !
it wasn’t a full album, but it was still music so !
the album dropped on the same day as “truth or dare,” and the single’s mv actually premiered on disney channel, and—get this—myspace
so 2009 !
it did. okay on the billboard charts ! “truth or dare” debuted at no. 90 on the billboard hot 100, and the album itself didn’t debut on the bb200 at all sjwujsj probably bc it was a single album unfortunately
however, the single was smashing away on radio disney and itunes ! it debuted at no. 2 on radio disney and it even managed to debut at no. 1 on itunes ! it stayed there for a hot min (and i do mean a hot min MSNWJJSJS) before dropping to no. 6, and it eventually fell off the charts completely. unfortunately jsiwjsjs
shortly after, kaori went on radio disney as one of what was supposed to be many promos 😭 but we’ll get to that later SWIHKDJD
but she had fun ! it was her first time on an actual radio show, and she was there to promote her own music,, like she sounded so giddy the entire time sjwijsjks
a few weeks later she was on good morning america to perform “truth or dare” and “invitation,” and the interview was cute ! like she got to talk about the writing process that went into each track (bc, yes, she did write all 3 songs !), and she was also asked about which jonas brother she liked ???
like girl she likes girls this is awks SJWIJS
but she said nick and till this day she still doesn’t know why 😭
she performed on ell*n and had a lil interview there, did a photo shoot with teen vogue (which was so cute ! like it was all sleepover themed mhm), did a campaign with covergirl (!!!), and then kaori went straight to newark in november to open for miley cyrus’ wonder world tour
and that was so fun ! like she was surprised at how many people cheered for her even though she was also on hannah montana SKIWJSJ
during day 2, she and miley performed “potential breakup song” ! like absolute fan favorite everyone ate it up
but then after that, promotions just. stopped ???
like kaori was supposed to perform at the macy’s thanksgiving parade, but it was canceled bc flying to newark, performing, then flying back to la ofc took a lot out of her
she told fans that she would be back eventually, but then nothing happened 😭
kaori flew back to new york, and that was literally all she wrote
now, shortly after 2010 began, kaori finally came back to the internet ! she explained on her blog (which was no longer on myspace </3) that she took some time off to go back to school, and doing so made her want to do music again !
she said that she was writing new songs, and that she was flying back to la in february to record ! and the girls were ecstatic !
the flying back to la and recording did in fact happen, but a few months passed and like. there was no album ???
eventually disney went all “yeah the album got delayed y’all will probably get it in 2011” when it was supposed to be released at the end of 2010 like girl ! and then kaori confirmed that so everyone had no choice but to just wait unfortunately </3
in the middle of this absolute mess, kaori actually went to the kcas, the premiere of a film she was in, and the mtv movie awards, so it’s not like she completely disappeared !
but girl then she did 😭
2011 came, nothing. january ended, nothing. then we got to MARCH, and still, absolutely nothing ! like it was complete radio silence from both kaori AND disney
then in may, we finally got something ! it was kaori coming back online to say that she had actually gone back to japan to attend high school, straight up LEFT disney and hollywood records, and that the release of her album had been canceled
LIKE 😭
since she was (understandably !) stressed out and tired that hollywood records kept pushing back her album, she just decided to go back home and focus on school and her skating career
and as she should ! bc why was kaori getting the sonamoo treatment ???
disney ended up confirming that, and obviously kaori’s fans were a lil peeved !
however ! kaori later said that she planned to continue her acting career and was still looking to release music, and ofc, we all know that did happen !
so with the release of “treat me,” the pre-debut era that lasted for exactly 2 months came to a very weird end </3
but whatever happened to those demos ???
well. 2 of them were actually leaked online in 2013 WKNSKSM (“MASTERPIECE” and “SUDDENLY” ! the former was actually used for a commercial that aired on disney channel in 2008 !) but in 2018, kaori managed to buy back the rights to her unreleased album, and released remastered versions of literally every single track onto youtube !
we were finally able to hear what the album would’ve sounded like,, 8 years later SKJDSJ
and apparently, it was supposed to be titled DON’T TELL ! the amount of people who heard the demos and KNEW that it was going to be an incredible album,, losing her was truly a tragedy
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— ADDITIONAL TRIVIA !
during kaori’s time at disney (which began in 2004 after a bit part in CONFESSIONS OF A TEENAGE DRAMA QUEEN), she contributed to the soundtracks of many television shows and original movies in addition to her acting work
the first soundtrack she contributed to was the HANNAH MONTANA soundtrack, of which she had a recurring role on starting in 2006. she assisted in writing songs such as “ROCK STAR” and “PUMPING UP THE PARTY,” and sang demos for some, which includes the former and “IF WE WERE A MOVIE”
kaori worked on the soundtracks of other pieces of disney media, including THE PRINCESS PROTECTION PROGRAM, 16 WISHES, CAMP ROCK, and SHAKE IT UP. she even managed to contribute to the VICTORIOUS soundtrack, assisting in the writing and composition, and singing the demo for “SICK OF YOU,” a track that ended up being sung by victoria justice on the show
although kaori didn’t pursue a music career too seriously during her time at disney, she still did quite a lot music wise while there. as a result, she’s been retrospectively dubbed “DISNEY’S UNDERRATED PRINCESS OF POP,” especially since her first original body of work was unfortunately largely forgotten
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mysteriawrites · 6 months
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Hi! I was wondering if I could get a matchup please?
I'm an Aries, infp,9w8, which is an odd combination I think lol. I'm pretty short only 5'1, I get told I have a pretty athletic build like a volleyball player, but I play zero sports. I tend to get insecure of my looks cause I don't look my age at all, people always think I'm like four or so years younger than I actually am. I like dyeing my hair colors like hot pink, and lavender. I'm pretty introverted on the surface as I'm like hella scared of rejection, but once I get to know someone I'm very chatty and bubbly, I love reading, writing and listening to music (late 90s early 2000s pop rock/indie mostly). I'm the therapist friend but also the goblin friend. My love language is physical touch and words of affirmation, both giving and receiving, though with physical affection it tends to be a lot more of poking and playfully punching others (if they are fine with it ofc). I'm very sensitive, like painfully so, I get told a lot that I'm a "bleeding heart" and I tend to cry when people raise their voices at me which is very annoying.
Thank you! I hope you have a good day/night :)
Hello hello thank you for the request. DRUMROLL PLEASE!!!
🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁
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HEX HAYWIRE!!!
You and Hex go pretty well together. You both seem quiet at first but are actually hiding a rather chaotic side and can even be slightly insecure. I think that because you two understand what the other is going through, it makes it easier to express your love and bring each other up.
You and Hex met when you were enrolled in Xsoleil. You had the power of healing and immortality which many would kill for, but no one was aware of how much of a curse it actually was.
You had lived for a very, very, very long time. You made friends and lost them to time, found love and lost love, you saw the world build and destroy for centuries without much you could do about it.
All the memories and feelings good and bad began to pile up in your head and darkened your heart. To the point where you thought it would be better to wonder the earth alone from now on.
Until you arrived at the institute that is. How you ended up there no one is entirely sure (author chan couldn’t come up with any ideas), but they decided it would be best if you had some counseling.
And that was how you met Hex Haywire. At first it started as a typical councilor and client type deal. You were forced by the school to come in once a week and talk to him and he would sit and listen intently.
Over time you would open up to him more and more as you slowly let down the walls you had been building for centuries.
One day after hours you had forgotten something in a classroom that you needed for your homework, so you went to go get it. As you went down the hall you passed by Hex’s office and heard sobbing.
You knew it was after hours, so he probably wasn’t with another student. You became worried that maybe he was hurt or in danger, so you knocked on his door. The door opened to reveal a very disheveled Hex who greeted you with a smile.
Now Hex has learned to become very good at hiding his emotions in order to be strong for others, but you somehow could feel that something was not right with him. So, you invited him to have tea and talk with you.
Ever since then you two became each other's support. He would help you whenever you two had counseling sessions, and you would help him take a load off after hours with midnight tea and chatting.
It took him awhile to open up to you for he didn't want to burden you, but eventually he learned to rely on you as well. Things were peaceful for a while. Until they weren't.
One day you walked into Hex's office to a very serious looking Hex. You asked him what was wrong, and after a moment of silence he told you that he could no longer be your counselor and that you guys should probably stop hanging out together too.
You asked him why and he was reluctant to answer. You felt betrayed and hurt. You had finally been brave enough to get your walls down with someone, and they don't want to be friends anymore.
You demanded to know why, and it became a heated argument. When the tension reached its peak, Hex revealed that the reason he couldn't keep seeing you anymore is because he had fallen in love with you.
It was unprofessional and a conflict of interest for a counselor to have romantic feelings for his client. However, his feelings for you grew, and it ate him up inside to be able to be with you so he figured it would better to stop seeing each other all together.
As he confessed his feelings, you began to feel guilty for pushing him but also a different feeling. You realized that you as well could not bear the thought of losing Hex. You too were in love with him.
After a long and emotional talk, you and Hex confessed your feelings. You decided to take things slow for now, but sure enough you two became a very serious couple.
You two would mainly spend your days cuddling and watching a movie, listening to music together, or showering each other with compliments. You two can also be a bit teasing sometimes (he especially likes to tease you about the height difference between you two), but you guys know not to take it too far.
You are each other's support system and wouldn't have it any other way.
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RUNNERS UP: Ike Eveland
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truckermelissa · 9 months
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If you see a conservative saying this, just be aware, that they are lying to you. Wholesale. This is why they use weasel words when they say these things. Always watch for these words when talking with conservatives. "Many" "Most" "Millions of" etc. These are weasel words, and they use them because they know they cannot quantify a single word they said. The reality is, if there are conservatives who are "fine with gay people" they are an extreme minority going back decades right up to the present day, so small a minority to be politically invalid, and that's what counts here. Unlike conservatives, I actually know Queer History, I'm 41-years-old, and I have a VERY good memory. Let's go through the catalouge of Conservatives in the last 40 or so years. 1980s: As the HIV pandemic was raging though the queer community conservatives were perfectly content callously watching it slowly and painfully kill 100s of thosuands of people. The deaths reached nearly 20,000 in the US in 1992 alone. They called it "god's retribution", nothing quite like "Christian Love" indeed.
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President Ronald Reagan didn't say a single word nor lift a finger to do anything about it. Finally in 1987, after pressure from epidemiologists and queer rights groups, he created a commission. Led by a one Admiral (ret.) James David Watkins.
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Now the Admiral here was a big fan of witch hunts within the military to dishonorably discharge anyone suspected of homosexuality. So that basically is all you need to know about him. Even his half-hearted attempts at doing something, anything at all, were completely ignored by the Reagan and later Bush Sr. administrations if you can believe it. Mind you, the Reagan/Bush administrations desire to do nothing at all about the AIDS pandemic not only worsened the pandemic, but had utterly no basis whatsoever in science, medicine, or sociology, it was pure Christian Conservative ideology. Nothing else. 1990s:
As the AIDS pandemic continued to burn though the population, the conversation began to shift by the early 1990s. In 1993 Bill Clinton and a hostile Congress were butting heads over a number of things, mostly related to the deficit left by the Reagan Administration. One of the talking points of the day was Gays in the Military.
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Conservatives unilaterally wanted the military to go on witch hunts and dishonorably discharge all LGBTQ service personnel. They claimed it would destroy the military to let us serve. To which I have one question: Hey conservatives, how's that working out? It's been 12 years since LGBTQ were allowed to openly serve. Has the military collapsed yet you fucking idiots? Or were you lying as fucking usual? Anyway, Bill Clinton managed to piss off the Left and the Right (yes, the Left was fighting for gay rights in the 1990s) by introducing "Don't Ask; Don't Tell" in 1993. This would be policy for 18 years. Indeed, I was in the US Navy from 2000-2011, and am well aware of Don't Ask; Don't Tell, posters like this were common as were slurs from the chain of command.
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Additionally, conservatives at the time were arguing that LGBTQ people should not be able to adopt and should they somehow have biological children, should be taken away from them. Funny how that came full circle huh? If your noticing a trend here, then you are paying attention. Much of the conservative horse shit is recycled over and over again.
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Keep in mind, Trump did the same thing in 2020. I would LOVE for Conservative LGBTQ to circle that square, but I digress.
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Now, it wouldn't be until the Obama Administration in 2011 that Don't Ask, Don't Tell would be repealed and gays allowed to serve openly, to much fierce resistance from........CONSERVATIVES!
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2000s: Bush Jr. is president, trade towers are rubble, and we are engaged in what would become a 20-year long campaign of conquest on the other side of the planet. Bush backed a Constitutional Amendment to ban gay marriage.
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Additionally, Bush defended gay sex bans.
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That's right, gay sex, much less marriage, was illegal in much of the country until 2003, something that would come to an end, much to the chagrin of conservatives, in Texas v. Lawrence. This isn't ancient history, this was 20 years ago, on similar grounds of Roe v. Wade, which is why CONSERVATIVE judges in the Supreme Court want to "revisit" it. Conservatives want to make gay sex illegal again.
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2010s: As stated earlier, in 2011 Don't Ask, Don't Tell was repealed by Obama. Additionally in 2015 Obergefell v. Hodges was ruled making gay marriage legal across the country. Indeed prior to this some states came up with the 2nd-class citizen status of "civil unions" while others outright banned gay marraige in any form. I'll let you guess what states those were and if they were red or blue states. (Hint: It wasn't Blue States) But Obergefell passes and DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act) is ruled unconstitutional. Boy were conservatives pissed about this.
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LGBTQ rights were fought for and won not because of, but in SPITE of conservatives. Anyone who tells you differently is either lying, stupid, a propagandist, or any combination thereof. While Democrats could be criticized for their general inaction, and even at times complicit behavior, it was not they who were driving the fight against our rights. It is, has always been, and continues to be CONSERVATIVES. So if there's this chunk of conservatives who are allegedly fine with LGBTQ people, they are politically irrelevant within conservative politics. So irrelevant as not even worthy of consideration, and at worst, they do not exist. Never forget it.
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fizzingwizard · 9 months
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Because of those last two posts I randomly started thinking about Yugioh... and in particular the Doma arc... about which my opinions haven't changed since I was a teen, even though they were unpopular ones.
Since I'm perpetually long-winded I'll put the tl;dr up here: fans were unreasonbly harsh on Other Yugi during Doma because they were too busy feeling upset about Yugi to appreciate Other Yugi's storyline. But some of that is Doma's fault because while it's way stronger than a lot of filler, it's over-involved and has a rushed ending that fails to express its hero's growth. Also YGO fan culture circa Doma-era majorly sucked lol.
I never hated Doma. It's is my favorite filler arc, and what's great about it because it's filler is that it's not dumb. So much of 90s/2000s filler arcs in anime were just painfully stupid. But YGO, buoyed, I guess, by it's over-reliance on card games, was able to construct a couple filler arcs that weren't mindless nonsense. Not all of them! The KC Grand PRix, for example, is so bad it's unwatchable. But the Noa arc gave us a lot of backstory for the Kaiba brothers and asked some interesting questions about family and love. It doesn't go super deep, and the ending is uh, pretty weird, but also very fitting for sci-fi. It's not my favorite, because despite the ways it's better than most filler it's still got a lot of "stupid filler" features. But I appreciate that it took on something which was going unaddressed by canon (the Kaiba bros and their history) and tried to develop it.
Doma was like that. It took on the fact that Other Yugi is the soul of a pharaoh from ancient Egypt who has no memories of being so, and asked, "What does he actually feel about that?" Because all he does is play card games. Now and then we see him joking around with Yugi, even more rarely the others. But mostly he shows up, plays a cool combo, makes a kingly speech, and then disappears back into the Puzzle. It made sense in the context of the story. He's still fighting the war from the past, and he doesn't want to interfere too much with Yugi's present life. But as a fan, you gotta wonder what Other Yugi felt, discovering he's not actually an aspect of Yugi's personality but an entirely separate person with a past he no longer remembers.
Doma decided to ask that question. Of course it couldn't give us Other Yugi's backstory, since that would happen in canon. But it could address how Other Yugi feels while still not knowing anything. It could look at all the horrible things which have happened which are connected to Other Yugi, and which people (even fans sometimes!!) blame Other Yugi for even when it's not his fault, and ask what impact so much pressure would have on him. It said, "He's stressed. He acts strong, but he's not okay. He's reliant on Yugi for humanity, which means compassion and faith in his own goodness. If Other Yugi is a good person, he must be unable to look at the horrors going on around him and think it's fine. He must be wondering if he himself is evil, for being part of the cause. And a good person who thinks he's evil is bound to reach a breaking point."
I'm not counting the battle with Kaiba at Pegasus's Castle as a canonical breaking point because it's really more about Yugi's strength, and Other Yugi didn't even have a concept of himself having a past outside of Yugi then. That's memorable for totally different reasons. Although he initially tries to sacrifice it for Yugi's sake, in the end Canon Other Yugi follows the course of "destiny" with unfaltering dedication. I suppose the idea is that Other Yugi's convictions about his destiny are just too strong to brook any misgivings like the ones posed in Doma. But I always thought Other Yugi needed real character development, and before Memory World, Doma is pretty much the only thing that gives it to us. So I have to admire it for that.
Here's the tricky part. Doma took on something huge for Other Yugi. It put him in a situation where he had to face his anxieties that he might not have been a good king, that he might be just as bad as Bakura's other self. Where he had to exist on his own and trust in his own goodness sans Yugi's influence. It's a huge undertaking for canon, let alone filler!
I think Doma is right in its take on Other Yugi: that he'd be lost and bereft not because of not having Yugi but because not having Yugi means those weaknesses have nowhere to hide. Other Yugi is struggling, but he always struggles where no one else can see, and presents only strength and confidence in public. But the thing is, fans had never seen that before. The most we saw (if you were watching the Japanese version, btw, the US dub just wrote right over the following lines) was Other Yugi apologizing to Yugi for what he had to go through and wondering briefly whether he was bad for causing it. That happened in Battle City and was quickly forgotten.
We always see Other Yugi the winner. Doma showed us Other Yugi the loser. And fans did not accept him. I know the reason why is because he bartered Yugi's soul for the sake of winning. He thought he was bartering his own soul - a relevant point I feel many fans overlook - but it's still clearly risky, and on top of that, he went as far as to block Yugi from interfering with his duel with Raphael. Other Yugi took a massive risk with a power they knew couldn't be trusted, and he barred Yugi from having a voice while dueling in Yugi's body. It's all round terrible choices on Other Yugi's part.
Which is another part of Doma I love. It didn't give Other Yugi some stupid choice no one could really hate him for. It said we're going to test this guy for everything he's worth and it fucking went for it. That makes it very different from the Noa arc, where the Kaiba bros are unquestionably the stars and heroes.
In themes, Doma and Noa are similar. Both call into question one person's loyalty to another and ask whether their love is real or simply useful. Kaiba, as a sometimes villain, sometimes anti-hero, gets pretty lovely treatment: the fact that he's not a nice guy and puts his brother in dangerous situations all the time barely matters. And also when he loses it's fighting for his brother, and then there's someone (Other Yugi) to step in and win on his behalf. Meanwhile, with Doma, Other Yugi starts out as a hero, so he has much farther to fall. His duel with Raphael isn't for a righteous reason, but a self-serving one. And when he fails, there's no one to help. And he really loses what least deserved to be lost.
The stakes were high and Doma let the hero fail catastrophically. Because Doma understood that the only way characters grow is through failing tests against themselves. Not against business executives. Not against millionaires.
And Doma gave us plenty of explanation for Other Yugi's failure too! It didn't make him a temporary villain who would just go back to being the hero at the end of the filler arc so we'd all say "oh, Doma, yeah that was stupid and doesn't fit anywhere in the story as a whole." Doma told us that Other Yugi is breaking down without anyone knowing, and Raphael and Orichalcos are the final straw. Doma says this was going to happen, and if it hadn't happened, Other Yugi would have been weaker going into his final battle for his destiny. Doma said Other Yugi is traumatized too. And why shouldn't he be, having so much pressure on him all the time, with so little knowledge of himself and so little to distract him in that dank, dark mental labyrinth where he's trapped day in, day out?
This is what I think fans as a whole missed because they were too busy freaking out about "angelic Yugi, poor baby!" Don't get me wrong. Yugi is everything good and Other Yugi did make a horrible choice with Orichalcos. But Other Yugi is suffering from trauma every bit as much as the Kaiba bros. It's an existential trauma as well as a magical one which means it much less relatable, much less visceral. And Yugi is so sweet and kind! It's so easy to forgive the Kaiba bros because they love each other, be upset on poor Yugi's behalf, and completely ignore the intense mental upheaval Other Yugi was going through. It's not that Other Yugi should get blanket forgiveness. But his motives should be understood and his pain should be respected.
He didn't set out to risk Yugi's soul, or the Duel Monsters either for that matter. He meant to risk his own and to prove his mettle as a king by overcoming the Orichalcos's influence. It was stupid because he didn't have any proof that that was a good idea except that Raphael provoked him to try or accept that he was a failure. As a very strategic player, Other Yugi is used to taking calculated risks. But this wasn't that: if he'd been calm, he'd have realized that he couldn't be sure Yugi's soul would be fine and only his own would be lost. And he'd have realized that he had only Raphael's word that a pure soul could overcome Orichalcos to go on. Granted, Raphael seeming in perfect control while using Orichalcos himself probably seemed like pretty good evidence. But it certainly wasn't the only possible explanation and normally Other Yugi would know that. He chooses to play the Orichalcos card clearly under a lot of strain, even pushing Yugi away, which is unprecedented.
What this means is that, afterwards, the reason Other Yugi is suffering isn't just because of losing Yugi. It's also because he's now lost what sense of self he had. He had so little of it going into the Raphael duel, and he wanted to gain more by overcoming Orichalcos. Instead he lost Yugi and he lost his idea of himself as someone who cares about others and can trust his own heart. That's why he wanders. That's why he's so mixed up and and sad and broken for the next several episodes. And it's why, once again, Doma put off fans.
Because fans don't like to feel sad, unless it's in an "aw, poor puppy" way. They don't like to see someone who is strong wrestle with not being so. And words like "arrogant" or "impure" are trigger words in fandoms: apply them to any character even one time and that's all fans will remember about them forever and ever. Other Yugi made an arrogant decision; he acted arrogantly. But arrogance isn't who he is. How can we tell? Because he comes back, he wins and gets back what he lost, and he apologizes. And he doesn't do it again. He does better. The same goes for "impure." What even is purity? Why did fans accept it just because Raphael said it was real and mattered? Raphael provoked Other Yugi's anxieties and then laid a trap for him: he gave him what he most wanted, a duel that would "prove he's a true king," and set him up for an entire mountain of despair to crush him one he fell for it. Even with Yugi, Other Yugi was already in such a state of confusion and fear that it was something others could manipulate. Losing Yugi was heart-breaking, but it wasn't the cause of Other Yugi's troubles: they already existed. I prefer Doma's odyssey of test and riddles to the manga version of Atemu, who blindly does what he's told to do because "destiny," but who is also revealed to be just as much the player as a pawn during Memory Game without any transition.
Now that I've praised Doma up and down, let me wind back and say I also hate it. Because for all it gives us that's great, its execution leaves a lot to be desired. Other Yugi is rather hard to watch when he's so sad and weak for so long. It's especially hard when he's got Jounouchi and Kaiba for comparison, both of whom were put in much more heroic storylines. I find Kaiba's dull, since there's not really much Kaiba is really guilty of there - Amelda's grief was Gozaburo's doing. Jounouchi's is great for him as a masculine hero, but fucking sucks for Mai who is a helpless female caught between two men and sapped of any personal motivation. I love Jounouchi/Mai so I really wanted to like their subplot, but Doma really ruined Mai for the sake of Jounouchi's heroism.
Which makes me wonder if Doma hates Other Yugi. It gave classic hero stories to the others, but beat Other Yugi so hard he was wounded forever in the eyes of some fans. Especially in the aftermath of Doma's first airing, every fic had to make sure to describe Other Yugi's "arrogance" to prove they didn't like him an unreasonable degree. It's one reason I stopped reading YGO fic back then: I couldn't open one that didn't mistreat Other Yugi, often while glorifying Yugi's perfection or going to lengths to sympathize with and justify Kaiba's wrongs.
So are there things Doma should have done to lift Other Yugi up the same way? My overall opinion is not really. I think Other Yugi's Doma arc is clear and fitting right until the final battle. BUT! It fumbled the ending. It fumbled it really bad. The battle with Dartz gets stupid by not doing anything with Yugi and Other Yugi's long-awaited reunion. Not only was the art in that episode unfortuantely awful, but the scene itself is like... seconds. Barely memorable. Yugi hugging his friends is way more satisfying. And the weird bit at the end-end where Other Yugi gets hit by the vortex of anger and grief, I guess, was meant as the final proof that he had overcome all the tests Doma threw at hm. But once again bad art and a "running out of budget" vibe hurt that as well.
Endings are important. You can't rush them. Because Doma fumbled the ending, Other Yugi's victory has much less of an impact. Because it doesn't step back and reflect, but just kind of spouts some cliche phrases, we forget what Other Yugi has really accomplished. Kaiba sacrificing himself to let Other Yugi keep battling is memorable. In fact, Kaiba was much more useful than Other Yugi in most of the final Dartz duel, because Other Yugi had not quite recovered his confidence. After Kaiba's loss, Other Yugi faced real despair again, which should have been awesome but was, by then, kind of like "oh, he's sad again. Will he ever stop being sad?" Yeah, he won. We got cool golden lights and shit and then a miracle. But it's not the same as that victory being felt by fans.
So that's why in the end, I'm always half-and-half on Doma. Because it did what no filler ever dared to do before, I admire it so much. But because it was filler, it also couldn't keep all the subplots in balance, it couldn't do its main characters justice, and most importantly, it didn't stick the landing. For all those reasons, I understand why fans have mixed opinions on Doma. My general sense is that it's disliked but in a weird way where everyone still references it and uses it in their fics - proving how superior Doma is to other filler.
I will always have beef with fans who are unreasonably hard on Other Yugi over Doma, especially when those fans don't bat an eye at things other characters do. I hate that the purpose of Other Yugi's Doma arc flew over so many heads or just went unappreciated. I really felt it was much needed character development. And most of all I hate the impact it had on fandom, which made it so impossible to find Other Yugi-related fan works that didn't either overdo Doma or make sure Other Yugi was everlastingly apologetic about it.
Really, I can't express how nuts the fandom nonsense was - I didn't even want to talk about Doma, because fans were so extremely sure about Other Yugi's arrogance and Yugi's saintliness. Call any of that into question and you'd get attacked. It's been like two decades now though so I should be safe... right? X'D
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museenkuss · 1 month
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I don't vape or smoke but stereotyping and speaking down on others who do is incredibly immature (and very unattractive). the whole point of vaping was to help people get off of cigarettes. and on top of that, you don't know if they're vaping cannabis oil for health reasons or if they're using organic eliquid as a safer alternative to quit smoking. romanticizing cigarettes is making kids think smoking is cool again and creating a new generation of nicotine addicts just for the "aesthetic"
We're talking about two different things. I don't really care whether people think I'm unattractive based on my posts (we can never escape the wish to be liked, but I try to keep the inner censor when it comes to that to a minimum), but I do want to make it clear what it meant, since there is a large chunk of background info (aka my broader belief system) missing from that post. I'll try to summarise it as best I can:
firstly: You're right in sending this message. Reading my post back made me very upset, especially the "addicted" part is really gross. I knwo what I meant but reading it back without the context of what I was thinking at the time really made me disgusted with myself, too. So thank you for making me come back to it.
Re: smoking cigarettes as an aesthetic (instead of vaping (=the topic my post was about)). I don't think smoking in any way, shape or form is cool. Growing up in the 2000s, I was influenced heavily both by the last traces of the pro-smokers aesthetics (chic skinny bitches smoke instead of eating, cool rebels smoke to rebel) and the rising anti-smoking movement (smoking will kill you, your loved ones and your pets slowly and painfully). Conclusion: again, I'm anti-smoking (I've been around enough chain-smokers to be), but the last glamour of cigarettes stuck to me, too. So, cigarettes as an aesthetic concept still have an appeal to me. But my opinion of "this is gross and you're childish for thinking it's cool" still applies. I don't agree with a lot of "I'm so sexy for smoking" content on here, but I might still reblog photos etc that involve cigarettes/smoking. Complicated situation, not what the post was about though.
On to what the post was actually about: Vaping is of course a healthier alternative to smoking cigarettes. Of course that's what it was intended for - or at least that's what companies say it's intended for. My personal opinion is that in the wake of the asbeforementioned anti-smoking movement of the 00s, smoking has become increasingly less cool and/or accepted (good.) and companies had to find other ways to make money. Making a device they can sell as healthier alternative is a good move. To then go ahead and make those products extremely appealing to children is also a very smart move. You can get money from people you previously got addicted to cigarettes AND you can groom a new generation of nicotine addicts by selling them blueberry muffin-flavoured vapes. Do I know for sure that that was the plan? No. Do I find it despicable that they make candy-flavoured vapes? Yes.
Re: Nicotine addiction. You didn't touch on that in depth, but I want to, because my post could be read in this way as well: People become addicted to things for a number of reasons, a good number of which is them being in some way, shape or form vulnerable. I know this sounds like I'm saying the opposite of what I said just now but I don't think that addiction is shameful. I know it's rich to say "this post wasn't about people with an addiction", but I was more thinking about the concept of smoking for fun and sex appeal.
As in: What I do look down upon and what I find annoying and gross is that smoking is framed as cool. And that's the thing I look down on, that's the embarrassing part. Vapes being an aesthetic. Vapes being chic or trendy. It's devious marketing on one hand and embarrassing behaviour on the other hand. And again, to make it as clear as possible: this is not about people who are recovering from an addiction to cigarettes. This is about teenagers who think they're sexy or businessmen thinking they're savvy for suckling on automated cancer sticks that smell like banana milkshakes. I also see that those teenagers could very well end up being addicts, too. And I need to reframe my mindset here because those children (or businessmen) also deserve respect and help. It's the starting point of someone thinking "this is a really cool thing to do ;)" that annoys me.
I also think about the switch from cigarettes and their image even at the time when it was considered sexy (harmful, stinking, butts everywhere) to vapes and THEIR image (harmful but not as much, so much healthier! smells so good! cool tech!) in regards to what chicness and coolness means. I could go on about this, but I think it's a broader topic, so I'll try to summarise it like this: The switch to thinking something so incredibly sanitised is cool/chic/rebellious to me seems to be saying something about a broader switch in aesthetics. Everybody is beautiful but no one is horny, you're not punk your clothes are from shein, etc. But again, that's something that could be elaborated on in a different context.
To summarise: I don't think smoking of any kind is sexy, this post was taken out of the broader context of my thought pattern and I see how it could be misinterpreted and I'm genuinely sorry if it made someone who's a nicotine addict, recovering or otherwise, feel bad. That was never my intention and it's my bad for writing the post without putting it in a bigger frame. I do, however, think thinking smoking is cool or sexy is embarrassing. I get it a little more with cigarettes due to my background, but still.
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taiyakiiwrites · 2 years
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— DATING START! feat. DENKI KAMINARI
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pairing(s): denki kaminari x gn!reader
wc: 0.7k+ words
content: denki being a simp, good vibes!! and some serious lovey dovey stuff at the end as a lil treat
notes: i’m thinking of making a series of relationship headcanons with class 1A. tell me what character you want to see next! hope you enjoy!
⇉ requests are open!! || main masterlist || rules
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denki kaminari is a simple man: give him someone who has okay morals and who’ll give him attention and you got him interested
he likes having fun! once you two are dating, he’s immediately reeling you into adrenaline rushing activites:
rollerskating rinks! even if you’re shy, he’ll stay by your side, holding your hand as you’re holding onto the rail ㅠㅠ though whenever you’re ready, he’ll pull you into the center and dance with you to the funky 80s citypop playing on the speakers
and the lights with the music just make it so magical!!1!1
amusement parks! he will not budge from those carnival games until he wins you a teddy bear >:(( the whole day is just you and him running around the park from one ride to another and taking a bajillion photos
side note: he will do his best to take great photos of you. cause in the end, it’s a win-win: you get nice photos of yourself and a self-esteem boost, and he gets more photos of you to simp over and show off to his friends
“i know, my s/o is amazing? are you jealous? ‘cause you should be >:))”
the beach! no, this is not an excuse to see you in a swimsuit okay maybe that’s a reason but he enjoys the sun! from eating ice cream and relaxing on the sand, to making sandcastles and crying when they get destroyed by the waves ㅠㅠ
but when you guys aren’t outside, he enjoys playing video games with you. any game, really.
and no, he will not go easy on you.
this is war.
though, he likes it when you work together in games. he likes being on a team with you! and i get big nintendo vibes from him, so a lot of classic kirby and super mario
i personally think he really enjoys super mario galaxy ✨✨ it’s a way for him to calm down from the stress of everyday life, and with you by his side, it’s 1000x better
he also shows you his other interests! his manga collection, his music taste—you two like to listen to energetic and painfully basic 2000s pop music together whenever you need to get pumped up! for a big test, when you don’t feel motivated, or when you’re just plain bored :DD
he does love his paramore tho <33
and yes, he has tried to bake for you on special days (ie birthday, anniversaries, etc)
,,, but uh
let’s just say he’s been banned from the kitchen and will be chased down by bakugo if found within a 5 foot radius of the area
he’s a tad clingy in your relationship
okay, he’s very clingy
the idea that you chose him out of all of the other amazing students in UA baffles him, so he is not letting you
insecurity can get to someone!1!1!
expect many texts and calls throughout the day, though a majority of the texts will be memes 💀
he really does just want the best for you. he wants to learn about you! your family, hobbies, likes and dislikes, and everything that makes you you
unfortunately, it can make the relationship feel very one sided at times, since he’s always doing things for you. every time you do even the smallest thing for him, he is shocked. obviously, he loves it! but he doesn’t feel like he deserves it
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he tries to put a lot of effort in the relationship, because if he does, then it’ll seem like he’s worth your time. that he’s actually allowed to be with you.
he wants you to know that he cares, that he’s always there for you, but he’s terrified of making a mistake
denki hasn’t had a lot of experience in relationships, so he feels like he needs to constantly be perfect for you. and he has a lot of insecurities about himself, so stick by his side and reassure him when he gets too overwhelmed with his thoughts
denki does have trouble being serious when it comes to his own problems though, so you really have to dig. don’t worry about hitting a sore spot—of course he wants you to know all of this. it’s just that it’s hard sometimes to open up. vulnerability is scary, y’know?
just be patient with him. he’s thankful for every time you show that want to help him out
you two have a lot of fun together, but underneath all of the banter and silliness, he has your back
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ramonag-if · 2 years
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Behind the scenes: Concept Idea for Crown of Exile
As a thank you for everyone who has followed and supported me, I decided to share the concept story of Crown of Exile with you all 😊 For those of you who don't know, Crown of Exile was never intended to be an IF game from the start. I had been dealing with writer's block for the past few years and the only writing I had done was my other IF game which was to help me learn how to code.
Once I started writing the scenes for Crown of Exile though, I couldn't stop myself from coming back to the story and the characters and I realised that it fitted much better as an IF than it would as a regular novel. So to express my gratitude, I've posted a portion of what I wrote very early on which later inspired me to write Crown of Exile - the game.
It's written in second-person POV with an established character (Aena, a young woman). There are some differences from this scene (the beliefs, the MC's Ishari past etc) that were not fully fleshed out when I wrote this so do expect to see slightly different names, ideas and deities.
I'll put it under the cut for those who'd rather not read it. It's around 2000+ words long and I cut it off before it starts spoiling the rest of the game.
Warnings: Swearing and mild violence
Crown of Exile
Summary:
Fleeing from your past, you find yourself in a deadly game of scheming and treachery. Your only companion is the exiled Prince Irus, who seeks to reclaim his throne. But who is supporting whom in this deadly dance of power? And who else are you running from?
You don a heavy cloak and wrap a woollen blanket around your shoulders. In a small chamber, you pause to pray to the goddess Arta for her protection. Besides you, Prince Irus scowls.
"Why do you still pray to her?" he snorts. "She's a cruel mistress. She will not heed your prayers."
"She grants those who believe with her blessings," you reply.
"And those who seek her favour," Irus snaps back.
His words sting like venom, stinging your pride and your faith. He is the rightful ruler of Cyre and in moments like these, you are painfully reminded of your stark differences.
"You wish for nothing more than to see Cyre thrown to the wolves," the prince says with a sneer. "I am the lawful king. I will reclaim my birthright."
"How can you when your allies have turned their backs on you?" you scoff.
"My allies have not deserted me," Irus says, the corner of his mouth turning up in a snarl. "The council of lords has. They fear me, and rightly so."
"You're an exiled bastard," you state.
"I am the rightful King," Irus says, his voice a low growl.
"You're not even a true Cyrene," you retort. "You're like me, an outsider."
Irus' face darkens as his eyes narrow. "You know nothing of my struggles," he growls.
"Certainly not," you scoff. "An upbringing of luxury and contentment. Some struggle."
"You have no idea what it's like," Irus retorts, "to live in a realm torn apart by war. To live in a country that lives in fear."
"Do you?" you retort. "You never grew up in Cyre."
"I know what you're trying to do," he says, "to diminish my claim. But I am King, and you shall not succeed."
"I don't care who wears the crown," you snap.
"You will," Irus says. "You do not have the courage, peasant."
"And you do?" you taunt back.
Irus clenches his fists, and his eyes narrow. He is most infuriating, an arrogant man who thinks his birthright is to rule.
"I curse the day anyone sired such a pup," he seethes. "I wish I'd never laid eyes on you, peasant."
"I can say the same about you, exile," you retort.
"You are the daughter of a fisherman," Irus says. "A common Cyrene. And you are a coward."
You lunge at Irus, despite his greater strength and size. Your hands grasp around his collar; your fingernails digging into his flesh as your arms shake with rage. You pull with all your strength as Irus' hands grasp around your wrists.
He pulls with equal strength, and your feet flail as you try to regain your footing. But he is taller and far stronger than you could ever be.
"You know nothing about bravery," you hiss. "Do not call me a coward when you run from your duties."
"Coward!" he spits. "You're right. I am the King. It's time I acted like it, don't you think, peasant?"
"Stop calling me that," you snap.
"You are only a peasant, and a weak one at that," Irus says.
"Fuck you," you growl.
You twist and wrench free of Irus' grasp, and he stumbles back, scowling. You rub your neck, your expression furious and your eyes hard. Irus laughs.
"You don't know how to fight," he says, his voice a low rumble.
"Find yourself a new guide," you yell. "I'm done with you."
"You're going to regret that decision," Irus says as he steps closer to you, his voice deceptively low.
You slap his face hard, the force of your blow shocking even as your anger fuels it. He reels back as his hands grasp his stinging cheek.
"Never threaten me again," you growl. "Find yourself another person to put up with you."
"As you wish, peasant," Irus says. "I am done with you."
He turns and leaves the chamber, letting the door slam behind him.
You growl out in anger, shaking your head and wondering what you just did. You wish you could take it back, regretting it more with each passing moment. You follow after Irus, who is already halfway down the stairs. With a growl, you follow him, leaving the prayer altar behind. As you descend, you feel the chill of the place seep into your bones.
The staircase is long and winding, seeming to go on forever. You follow after the exiled prince, who is several metres ahead of you and still descending.
"You cannot expect to be treated like a king," you yell.
"Watch me," Irus replies with a dark grin.
"You need to prove yourself," you say. "You need to act like a leader, not a spoiled brat."
"I am the rightful ruler of Cyre," he says.
"You're an exiled prince," you say. "While we're outside Cyre, your greedy uncle claims the throne for himself."
"He's a tyrant," Irus says. "We'll retake Cyre soon. I will retake what is rightfully mine."
"With what army? You've no allies. Your own family has cursed you out," you retort.
"We will recruit," Irus says, his tone dark. "We will find soldiers. We will make allies. The people of Cyre will stand with us."
"Recruit people with what? We don't have any gold. In fact, all we have is a few days worth of supplies," you reply.
"We will have what we need," Irus says. "I will retake what is rightfully mine."
You roll your eyes in irritation, but turn your thoughts to other things. You will worry about whether or not you can make it to the next day after you both reach your next destination.
You gather what little you have and mount Irus' stallion, and the two of you ride on. As the two of you ride onward, you consider Irus' words. You don't know if you can trust him. You don't know if you can rely upon him.
He is a spoiled prince. Where he grew up expecting luxury and servants, you grew up a poor fisherman's daughter. You learned a simple trick from him, however. He is a master at reading others. He can tell when people are lying, when people are hiding something.
Still, what good can that prove when the rest of Cyre inherently distrust Irus now that he's exiled?
You hope you'll have more allies when you reach Vinia, but you know that likely will not be the case. Vinia is a neutral country, but its people still tend to side with the dominant kingdom.
You ride on with Irus, who seems to be losing his earlier exuberance. He's quiet for most of the ride, and when he speaks it's only to give you instructions on how to get to the destination you're going to.
You steal a glance at his face now and then. He seems tired, and you notice how gaunt he's become. You wonder how long he can maintain this pace.
"It's getting late," you say. "It's dangerous to travel at night. We should stop at the next village."
"I'm not talking about you," you say. "Vinia is more than a day's ride. We cannot travel without stopping to rest."
"I'm not stopping," Irus says. "I will make it to Vinia by nightfall. Then we will rest."
"Yes, we can."
"You are in no condition to—"
"I am in perfect condition," Irus says.
"You're tired and so am I," you snap. "We can stop at the next village and continue tomorrow."
"I will not slow our pace," Irus says, his voice hard.
"Irus, think of your stallion," you sigh. "We cannot push ourselves harder than we are."
"The king never had a problem when he rode," Irus says. "I will prove it."
"You're not the king," you retort. "You're an exiled prince. Do you truly think Vinia will welcome you with open arms?"
"They will see the king's seal on my documents and they will know who I am," Irus says. "And they will help us retake Cyre."
You shake your head in frustration.
"We'll stop when we get to the next village," you say firmly. "I will not slow you down."
"We can make it in time," Irus says. "We'll be fine."
"We cannot," you spit. "What will you do when bandits attack us at night? It is not safe to travel after dark."
"I will fight them off," Irus says. "I will not be stopped from retaking my throne."
"You are tired and weak," you say. "There is a bounty on your head. You cannot win any fight in your state."
"I will win," Irus says. "When we reach the next village, I will have allies, not just soldiers. I will have nobles. I will have wealth."
"You will have nothing but me and your horse," you mutter.
"And that will be enough."
The two of you ride on in silence. You try to find a way to make Irus see reason, but it seems there is little that can dissuade him.
Soon, daylight fades and Irus urges his stallion on. Were it any other horse, you're certain that it would have collapsed by now. The prince is undeterred, however, and after several hours of riding you have left the sun's light behind. Farther you travel, as the sky grows dark and stars dot along its expanse.
You feel heavy with exhaustion, and your muscles ache and your throat is parched. The last thing you want to do is talk with the prince, but you cannot keep this up for much longer.
"We need to rest," you say.
"No, we don't," Irus says.
"I need to rest," you retort. "And so does your horse."
"It's too late to stop," Irus says. "We must keep going."
"It's too dark. My eyes will not see where I'm going. We are going to get lost," you retort.
"We will reach Vinia by dawn," Irus says. "Then we will rest."
You feel your frustration build. You're tired and sore and hungry and cold. Why must he be so stubborn? You reach over and pat the stallion, who whickers softly as he races onwards. You sag against the shared saddle, feeling Irus behind you, his weight and warmth pressing into your back. His arms are around you, the reins in his grip. You wish to stop but arguing with the prince has proven fruitless.
He is tireless, his will iron and adamant. The exhaustion that has been pulling at you for hours is almost too much to bear, and you are tempted to just curl up and sleep.
You feel weighed down by fatigue, your limbs heavy and aching. You would give anything to be able to sleep. For a moment, you let yourself close your eyes. Perhaps it's the steady pace of the stallion or perhaps it is Irus' warmth at your back but you find yourself dozing off.
You are drifting away when you feel a sudden movement and an arm slip around your waist.
Your eyes snap open and you pull away from the prince.
He scoffs, "You were about to fall from the saddle."
You rub the fatigue from your eyes as you settle back against the saddle. "It was hard to stay awake."
"You did not have to keep me company. I could have continued by myself," Irus says. "You were not needed."
"I had no choice," you mutter. "I promised my father that I would aid you. I will not go back on my word."
"You need not worry about your word," Irus says. "You are not bound by any contract. You can leave me anytime."
He is right. You could leave Irus and start a new life. One where you don't have to look over your shoulder, for fear of soldiers. Yet, where would you go?
Your father sacrificed himself in saving Irus and you. He urged you to flee when the soldiers attacked. Besides Irus, you have no one. You are not bound by any contract, as Irus said. You can leave him and his quest for his throne, and you would not be breaking any promise to your father. Yet, you fear that if you do, you would be dooming yourself to a fate without family or friends. How do you rebuild a life when everything you know is destroyed?
You are only here because of your promise to your father. You owe it to him to complete the task he set before you. Not because you need Irus as much as he needs you. It's what you tell yourself, despite the nagging thought in the back of your mind that says otherwise.
"If I left you, you would surely die," you huff.
"And you would be free. Who would save me then?" he asks.
You scoff at Irus in irritation. "You would die. I cannot watch you die. I will not abandon you."
"You are not abandoning me. You are freeing yourself," he says. "The freedom I seek is not your freedom."
"My father sacrificed himself to save you," you mutter. "I will not let you die so that his sacrifice can be in vain."
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animehouse-moe · 6 months
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I'm terrible with timeliness and acknowledging things, but I hit 300 followers on Tumblr a couple of days ago now, which I thought was pretty cool. The conditioned response is a "thank you", but that doesn't feel right (and not in a selfish way, at least I believe). It's really cool that 300 people actually follow me and this account on a platform as I talk about anime and manga and whatnot, but it's one of those things where the longer I think about it the more I wonder as to why.
It's not like I offer anything unique with my stuff. I don't post art or fanfictions or anything that I can say is my creativity alone. As far as I see it, I'm just a crazy person scribbling away at a wall in an empty and white room. But I also don't really make any attempts to humanize myself in a lot of what I share, mostly because I struggle with riding the line between getting my point across effectively and in a meaningful fashion, and sounding like a person instead of an AI-generated response.
So maybe I should try a little to express myself some more, starting now.
I never intended to ever make something like this, nor do a lot of people. I was a university student over 2 years ago now that wanted to work on a project, but I needed a direction, a purpose. I deeply struggle with creation without reason, so I tried to find a way to drop a carrot in front of my face to encourage progress. A blog website is a very simple and easy thing to build to fill out your project portfolio, so I thought on what I'd be interested in making it for. Cars? Cool, but too costly to really do much of anything with. Computer hardware? Similar struggle. At that time, "Anime" came to mind as a cheap and accessible focus thanks to my increased watch time of media due to covid, so I ran with it.
I would just build fake or temporary blog posts to fill out the site and test it. Then I thought, if I'm going to have a blog site I should probably make a Twitter account for it as well. Oh, I should probably do this too, and that also. And so I accidentally made an entire platform based off an idea for a programming project. After about a year I abandoned the blog website because the project was "complete" and it's not like I was getting much traffic to it. But I kept the Twitter going, and going. And then one day I ended up here, and just kept going until I reached this follower count. It's weird to think about, in a sense. I never intended this for last, but it won't let go of me. It's even weirder because in all of my life I've never really been one to do anything like this before.
That's about it for the history though, I should probably add some details to the present.
As I write this I'm listening to a playlist of my favorite Nine Inch Nails songs. I'm a really big fan of their earlier work from albums like The Downward Spiral, that Industrial Rock sound is just so satisfying to me. But I'm also a bit of a music whore myself. When I say "everything except Country" I really mean it. Everything under the sun aside from Country music I'm cool with, but no matter how many phases I go through in terms of genres, I'll always gravitate towards the older music I used to listen on the radio to in my dad's car as we traveled for sports tournaments when I was younger. Foo Fighters, Muse, Soundgarden, Rage Against The Machine, Red Hot Chili Peppers, all the great bands of the early 2000s.
I also really do love art books. I'm terrible at art though I've never seriously tried, no matter how many times I tell myself I will. It does make me feel like an asshole though when I comment on art when I have no talent. It makes me feel unqualified to offer input on it, and makes me painfully aware of how shallow my analysis can be in comparison to what actually knowledgeable people can provide. I feel very similar with how I talk about anime. I refuse to view my words as an end all be all to any of the creative aspects because I've never even tried to what some of these authors/staff members have. But just like the couch potato dad will critique all the star athletes making hundreds of thousands a game, I'll sit myself down at my desk and belt out my complaints with very little reservation. A very hypocritical activity.
Sometimes I struggle with a healthy relationship between myself and this account. I think it's important to view them as two separate things for sanity's sake as well as to stave off an inflating ego, but it doesn't always happen. There's days I feel guilty for not saying something, for not making use of the platform I've created. I can feel a need to post, to be productive and compare myself to actual content creators despite my adamant declaration that I'm not one. It's a silly thing, but the internet and social media can be a terrible place that inspires people to desperation, to a deep desire for validation and popularity and that the numbers that you can see matter a great deal. It's not really fun.
Despite my (self proclaimed) "knowledge" of social media and the spheres of it that I engage with, I'm pretty terrible with outreach. Someone asking questions or challenging a point that I've written are things I can do very naturally, but genuine outreach and interaction is something that I struggle with. Should I do a giveaway? What's the best way to do it to make sure it goes to someone that deserves it? How should I go about finding similar accounts to interact or collaborate with? Is it okay if I reply to this post or ask a question? Truthfully, I might go as far as to say that I'm socially inept in regards to social media. It's a wave that I struggle to ride despite my reliance on it in several ways. But it's something I'm at least trying to stick with, so if there's any accounts similar to mine or anybody reading this thinks I'd be interesting in, tell me about them. Yes, a pathetically lazy request to make, but I just find myself intensely apathetic to a lot of the forced nature of social media.
But I'm still here, for whatever reason that may be. And I like talking about anime, manga, and all sorts of other similar things, for whatever reason that may be. And people follow me and like my posts, for whatever reason that may be.
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alto-tenure · 10 months
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So this post crossed my path again, and it makes me wonder what it might look like to toss a Presidential Candidate Lex Luthor into a later election.
I think there's theoretical merit into having COVID be the equivalent of The Clench in the DCU, and then the Cataclysm, and then No Man's Land, just in time for 2024 -- but the 2024 election hasn't even happened yet. We don't even know who the candidates are. Maybe in about a year and a half after the 2024 election I'll go back and update this, but...not sure!
Anyways: Lex Luthor in a later election! I think for the sake of everything I'm going to go with 2016 instead of 2020.
For the record: Lex Luthor running as a third-party candidate and getting a lot of votes isn't entirely unprecedented! For those of you who aren't aware of post-Vietnam US history, in the election of 1992 there was a rich third-party candidate by the name of Ross Perot. He was fairly moderate by US standards.
I don't know much about Lex's campaign beyond the little bit I saw in NML, but Lex strikes me as someone who cares less about policy and more about image. Lex Luthor is not a wonk.
Donald Trump vs Hilary Clinton vs Lex Luthor: FIGHT!
I think the thing is that Donald Trump and Lex Luthor probably come across as similar to the public; they're both very very rich people that are "political outsiders" trying to build a crowd. If I had to guess, Lex would get a lot of the moderate Republican vote from people who dislike Trump, but also didn't like Clinton enough to vote for her. He would also probably sweep Gotham, seeing as he pretty much saved their asses. Generally home states tend to go for "their" candidate, too. Beyond that, I changed some of the swing states to Democrat because I think that Lex acts as more of a spoiler candidate to make the Republicans lose.
There are a lot of different ways to get to the required amount of electoral votes. I don't know how Lex was elected in canon, but I think this is how it goes in my vision -- disclaimer that I didn't look up how much certain states were won by either candidate:*
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See that? No one got to 270. Skill issue, am I right?
This means the House of Representatives would get to pick the president, and the Senate would pick the VP. I think Lex would win over Congress by playing on their guilt about what happened to Gotham, and making sure they were all painfully aware of the suffering while NML existed. So I think even with just a couple states' worth of electoral votes Lex could still end up President. It would be very unconventional and everyone would hate how it went down! But that's how I could conceivably see it going.
The altered political landscape of a Trump loss in 2016 to someone who is a lot like a less policy-extreme version of Trump is really interesting, though. There's some speculation that Trump wasn't running because he was actually interested in politics and was never truly interested in the presidency in favor of 1) upholding his reputation and 2) avoiding punishment for his many crimes. A Trump that loses 2016 is permanently laughed out of the political sphere. He will never have that back.
The US is also probably less authoritarian as a result of Trump not becoming president. Apparently Lex didn't go full dictator, so there's something.
The ramifications this has for the 2020 election are pretty high. I feel like so many politicians wouldn't be able to come back from having endorsed Trump and backing the Trump train. And Biden only ever ran for president because of Trump's election!
So you have a 2020 election that looks very, very different. I suppose there's a possibility of Ted Cruz for President 2020? Not sure who runs on the Democrat end of things.
I don't think this is the most interesting "toss Lex Luthor into an election that isn't 2000 and figure out how he wins" version of events. Like I said earlier, I think I would prefer a version where COVID replaces the Clench for the Contagion arc, and then NML happens around the time of the 2024 election instead, but that is still in the future, so alas we won't know how that election goes for a while.
*the source also didn't say whether Maine and Nebraska's votes were split or not but I doubt it based on the map I saw? the amount of votes stays the same even if the districts didn't all vote the same way
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occult-roommates · 11 months
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5 fun facts about Charlie
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EA please I’m begging you fix the face glitch I wanna play with my little pixel people again I’ll even buy a fucking kit if you get it fixed before Friday 😭
1) Her dad side of the family moved to Willow Creek from China back in the 1880s. Meanwhile, her mom was from China and her dad met her while visiting his ancestors’ country back in the late 70s. Also she was his second wife, and they have a significant age gap, so Charlie has a much older half-brother because of that, named Jeff.
2) Charlie is like, her actual full government name. It’s not short for Charlotte or anything. Her mom did use to call her Xiaoli when you know, they were still talking. It’s not on any of her paper however, but she did adopt it as a sort of middle name cause she didn’t had one and wanted to have one as a child cause all of her friend did.
3) Speaking of name, she has an extremely long and exhaustive list of all possible baby names. You know, in case she one day ends up having the child she longs for so hard. Mostly trendy names from the 2000s, gender neutral names, some Chinese names, some foreign names (you know in case her future husband is from a different country), potential nicknames, etc. She is prepared. 
4) As a child, Charlie used to be a fucking snitch and a massive rules sticker. She would tatle-tell anyone and everyone, on top of being unable to keep a secret. Once her brother bribed her to not tell their parents he had smoked weed, she took the money and told them anyway. She has gotten a lot better over the year and don’t do that anymore, though ironically considering how she is now, a lot of other kids did not trust her because of that.
5) She’s the token heterosexual of the group, like she’s painfully straight. Though very early on in like 2019 I was shipping her with Akva but now, I feel like the two have more of a big sister/little sister relationship so it would feel really weird and gross matching them together now. Also Charlie just does not give me even a bit of a sapphic vibe which...do you realize how rare it is when it comes to my main cast characters? She is an anomaly and needs to be studied.
Ok so Daniele is up next...Going from the straightest roommates to the gayest one. And please EA if it’s fixed before Thursday I’m even buying 2 kits please I’m on my knees I’m begging. *insert five sobbing emojis here*
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agentnico · 11 months
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Ghosted (2023) Review
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Adrien Brody’s crappy French accent in this movie I could have forgiven, if only I haven’t seen John Wick: Chapter 4 a couple of weeks ago where I experienced the most delightful Parisian mouthing of Bill Skarsgard’s villain, so now Brody’s French-ish slur sticks out like a sore thumb. And boy is this one sore thumb. Everything is not j’aime up in this joint.
Plot: Cole falls head over heels for enigmatic Sadie, but then makes the shocking discovery that she's a secret agent. Before they can decide on a second date, Cole and Sadie are swept away on an international adventure to save the world.
This is the third time Chris Evans and Ana de Armas are co-starring in a film together, following the fantastic murder mystery Knives Out and the Netflix action film The Gray Man. As such this pairing on paper seems like a natural one, however upon seeing the new Ghosted film on Apple TV+ I have made quite the peculiar discovery - these two have absolutely zero chemistry. I mean none whatsoever. All their flirting comes of as cringeworthy, the romance is none existent and I didn’t buy into their relationship whatsoever. Their kissing scenes reminded me of that Andrew Garfield/Emma Stone SNL sketch where they don’t know how to kiss on camera. It was just awkward. And when in a rom-com your central couple have no chemistry, well then the movie is doomed to fail as is. Also, talk about a miscast! Chris Evans is supposed to play a farmer boy with an inhaler having an innocent outlook on life, yet it’s so hard not to see him as the alpha male, as such making his casting very questionable. Ana de Armas is usually a likeable presence, however, again, here is very bland and forgettable. And wears a wig. A very obvious wig, made the more obvious by the Twitter community, so thank you guys. It’s a shame really, as one could have easily done a trashy silly spy rom-com with A-list actors. Just look at Mr & Mrs Smith - an absolutely stupid movie but its hard to deny the sex appeal of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie together... though obviously that hasn’t aged too well but back then they were fire!
There’s a lot of talent involved behind the camera here. Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick who are known as the writers of the very successful and entertaining Deadpool movies have story credits here, and Dexter Fletcher is in the director’s chair. Evidently all three must have been undergoing some kind of collective erectile dysfunction causing their creative juices to dry out like water in a desert, as this movie consists of all the possible Hollywood plot cliches imaginable, with a painfully unfunny script, boring direction and general nonsense. Fletcher is fresh off the heels of his previous directorial outing with the Elton John biopic Rocketman that was visually filled with colour and charm, yet here the directing is so shallow and plain. So uninspired. As for the action sequences, they are there I guess. There’s a somewhat passable fight/chase on a bus, but even then, all those stunts you would have seen before. 
Ghosted would have been a perfectly acceptable affair back in the early 2000s, however in 2023 it is simply ticking off every generic cliché of a Hollywood action film, only not anywhere as good as the movies its ripping off, nor that funny either. There’s even a few pointless cameos thrown in, and I do mean pointless. So in a nutshell, not worth getting Apple TV+ for anyway, however if you’re wondering about that streaming service, there is a delightful movie about the backstory of Tetris that came out on there recently starring Taron Egerton, and that’s actually much more interesting. 
Overall score: 3/10
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It’s been a very good couple of days for me and one of my favourite genres: anything ever made by any comedian who is now in their forties, did a show at Edinburgh at some point between 2000 and 2009, may have had a chocolate milkshake at some point during those festivals, or at least fits into a similar sort of style as people who did.
- So, I said a while ago that I was going to look for some Josie Long stuff, and I didn’t find as much as I wanted. I listened to her BBC Radio All the Planet’s Wonders, which was lovely but not the same as straightforward stand-up, and then looked around for her actual stand-up shows but couldn’t find them, and then got distracted by other things. I clearly got distracted before I could look too well, because I missed the fact that she has two full stand-up shows right on YouTube, one from 2008 and one from 2012 (the former is in six parts, but it’s all there). Classic overthinking, I look in more difficult places and don’t think to just check YouTube.
In the last couple of days this has been brought to my attention, as well as a couple of shows from the years in between, and I spent a lovely few hours on Josie Long’s stand-up. It was so worth the time, funny but also thoughtful and visceral and strongly engaging from start to finish. Really interesting to watch her transform over those few years, get more aggressive and confident in certain ways but with the heart of it being the same. It was the Josie Long that I know from panel shows and radio shows and that Stewart Lee thing and other clips where I’ve seen her - it was what I expected based on that, in content (themes of passion and excitement about beautiful things and anger and socialism), and style (optimism and despair, often somehow simultaneously). It was what I expected but also so much better to see the way she put it all together, in her own setting and under her own rules. I’m really glad I watched that, seeing Josie Long in her element instead of just in bits and pieces of other things seems long overdue, given all my other interests.
I really recommend those YouTube videos to anyone else who’s interested, especially the second one, from 2012. That’s hard to watch at times, because so much of it is anger at the way the country had been swinging to the right since David Cameron took over, and the idea that it was all getting so much worse and had to get better soon... it’s genuinely tough to remember where the Overton window used to be and how the standards used to be higher. But on the bright side, that show does have a fair bit of her talking about how much she loves everything about Scotland and dreams of moving to Glasgow (moments that made me feel kinship with her almost as much as the political stuff, since I romanticize the hell out of everything related to Scotland, only unlike Josie Long I’ve never been there so it’s definitely less acceptable when I do it, but it’s where my favourite music comes from and I want to see the purple heather and I have looked at the entire country on Google Earth and all of it is beautiful), and I know from something I read recently she has now moved to Glasgow, so that’s nice. While I watch it and painfully think, “Oh God, 2012 Josie Long, I’m so sorry for what the future has in store for your heart that’s in so much pain about the evils of the coalition government”, I can at least also think, “The Scotland thing did work out, though.”
- Heard a bunch of Isy Suttie at once for the first time as well, and enjoyed it even more than I expected to. So much that I’ve now added her BBC Radio Four series Love Letters to my collection of BBC Radio Four series, because I want to hear more of her, and again in her own right rather than just bits on other shows. I think I’ll do that one right after I finish Paul Sinha’s General Knowledge, which I started the other day, after finishing Paul Sinha’s History Revision. I have quite a bit of Radio Four at the moment.
- Thank you to @thatkidofwarandpeace for reminding me of the TV show Along for the Ride with David O’Doherty. That’s one I bookmarked a while ago, and then again, got distracted by other things. I’ve really enjoyed all five of his albums, and watched his 2006 TV show The Modest Adventures David O’Doherty, and I’d meant to cap that off with his other TV show, Along for the Ride. And then other things happened and I didn’t until now.
I’ve just watched the first of its four episodes, though, and it’s very nice. DO’D has been the star of two television shows, and it turns out that you can spot a few differences between the low-budget one on Irish station RTE Two in 2006, and the glossy Channel 4 one from 2021 that also features Richard Ayoade and Mel Giedroyc. The difference is vast sweeping shots of British scenery that are pretty much pornography to anyone who might happen to dream about someday doing a trip to the UK and seeing all the pretty places in person. Until I can actually make that happen, looking at this TV show is functioning as the next best thing.
It’s David O’Doherty being nice and calm and easygoing about allowing the humour to occur - all the things that I defensively insist he’s not. But he is all those things, those things are just not all he is. He has the depth and the intelligence and the resentment, and knowing all that is there and comes out when it makes sense makes it easier to enjoy this version of him. The guy getting filmed by cycling around England and Wales while doing gentle back-and-forth with Richard Ayoade (in the one episode I’ve seen so far, at least) to sweeping scenery. Basically, Channel 4 saw the idea that the BBC had with On Your Bike, the show-within-a-show on W1A, and said, “Actually that’s a good idea,” and now it’s on TV. And can be seen here, in relatively high quality, which is nice when the sweeping scenery comes in.
- I’m about halfway through Eleven, the novel by 100% of my Twitter followers (that’s what I call Mark Watson now). I’m going through it fairly slowly, which I feel like is the pace at which it was intended to be read. It’s so well written, but so carefully written with so many different details going off in different directions, I like taking in 15 or so pages and then putting it down and saying “Okay, we’ve added that to the growing pile of things that have happened.” It’s clearly building to something, as more and more of it fits together, and that’s exactly the level of care I’d expect in the work of 100% of my Twitter followers. It’s a nice read.
- Really good episode of Last Week Tonight this week. John Oliver took on the British monarchy and colonialism, in a piece that, given things he’s said about how long they work on most of them before airing, was probably started right when the queen died. There was nothing in there that’s new or shocking to people who already know the basics of the British monarchy’s role in the colonialism, but the groundbreaking thing was the fact that he took that shit that everyone else had to tiptoe around in the wake of the queen’s death, and put it on mainstream TV. He took advantage of the freedom that he has, working in America where he wasn’t restricted the way comedians in Britain were, and working for HBO where you can pretty much do anything, and said the obvious, along with a bit of deeper digging into a few of the more horrifying specifics. It’s a good thing that happened.
- The bad news for people who don’t care about this thing that has taken over my blog is I’ve got more Kitson, the good news is that it’s more stuff in a form that I’ll avoid writing too much about out of respect for his wishes to not have it out there publicly.
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