#something like ‘hi; just wanted to check the progress on this; i’m really anxious to get started in my job and meet my students.

[bwabys-scenarios]

Hi bwaby ~ I’m new to your page and I love your yandere posts ^^ I’m reading the ones you’ve written for Kurapika. I saw your requests were open.

How do you think hxh yanderes would respond to their captive s/o having a panic/anxiety attacks when their captor tries to get intimate? How would they go about that?

🖤 ur work 🖤🖤🖤 thnx

Yandere!HXH respond to you panicking during intimacy

!!REBLOGS APPRECIATED!!

warnings: dubcon, panic attack, bad aftercare, forced cuddling, slight manipulation/coercion with Chrollo(it backfires), vomit in Chrollo’s, Feitan is emotionally distant, Kurapika is unstable

A/N: just a little note that none of my yanderes will ever rape the reader. I just include dubious consent because being captive blurs the lines of consent. Can you really consent when you’re captive? I don’t know, so I include it just in case, even though in my eyes reader is always consenting during these acts. I’m not comfortable with writing out rape, so this situation is the farthest I go.

characters included: Kurapika, Leorio, Chrollo, Feitan, Illumi

Yandere NSFW: @lightshowerrr @jungtoast @nenggie @aliceattheart @pannacottababy

‼️If you want to be added to the taglist, please check out the taglist information then comment what you want to be added to! Make sure you have your age in your bio and that your blog can be tagged/mentioned!‼️

Kurapika

First of all, Kurapika is VERY hesitant to initiate any intimacy after he takes you away. He wants you to get used to your captivity before he starts anything.

Kurapika is also the only yandere on this list that won’t be overly pushy in terms of physical contact most if the time, and honestly he’s okay if you never love him again… even if he really wants you to love him and give him lots of affection. He knows he did something unforgivable by taking you away from your life, and he’s willing to be hated by you if it means you’ll be safe.

Now, when you do eventually initiate some kind of intimacy he is over the moon. He would do anything for you, desperate to please you and make the experience as good as possible. Kurapika wants your love, your physical touch, and he wants it willingly.

So when he initiates, kissing along your neck with his hand gently rubbing your clothed cunt, he stops immediately when you start to panic. “My angel? Are you okay?”

He’s quick to pull away and give you space. His hands shake and he feels guilt and panic rise in his own chest. Did he just ruin all of the progress the two of you had?

But you calm down after a little, and lean against him. “I… I’m sorry, I just… I got really anxious.”

He’s quick to wrap his arms around you, tentatively smoothing out your hair. “Don’t apologize… shh, just relax. We don’t have to do anything.”

Kurapika spends the rest of the night just a bit unstable, terrified that he’ll do something to upset you. He just loves you so much and he doesn’t want to lose your love and affection when he just got it back. The next day he makes sure to pamper you more than usual, and he’s almost a bit clingy… as if he’s scared he’ll lose you.

Leorio

He’s pretty handsy, though most of his touches are just affectionate in nature. When you cuddle, he has his hand in your ass or thigh, kneading at the soft flesh.

Leorio likes to have you in his lap as often as possible, where he can move you as he pleases as cover you in kisses as he holds you as close as possible.

He’s eager to get back to sex after he takes you, though he won’t push… too much. Leorio is just super clingy and you’re already sitting pretty on his lap, the only thing separating you from his is that pretty skirt you’re wearing!

It was a normal day, with you sitting in his lap after he tugged you his way. But this time, instead of the usual soft squish he’d give your thigh or kisses to your cheek or the top of your head, Leorio started moving you back and forth against the bulge firming in his pants.

You instantly froze, feeling his warm breath on your neck. When you began to panic and cry, Leorio paused for a moment. “Princess? Something wrong?”

When you started to struggle, he gently set you down. The air was thick and heavy with tension and awkward energy. He scratched the back of his neck, his boner gone. “You alright?”

You shook your head. “I… I don’t want to, Leorio… I’m scared…”

He felt his heart break a little, but he was quick to reach out and gently ruffle your hair. “Don’t be scared… I won’t… do anything to you that you don’t want…”

But it felt a bit hypocritical, considering he did steal you from your old life against your will. Leorio had standards though, and one of those was not assaulting people.

That night, he was way less clingy than usual, giving you some space and time to process things… but you joined him in bed for snuggles later.

Chrollo

He kept telling you he wanted to make your first time with him special, that he’d buy you flowers and pretty lingerie to wear. He even suggested getting a nicer hotel than usual, which was shocking because the hotels you usually stayed in with him were beyond luxurious.

So when the special night came, he took you out to a fancy dinner, letting you order whatever you wanted. You had become very complacent, accepting the fact you’d never be able to escape him… not even in death.

So you are your food, and you bathed before putting on the set of lingerie he surely paid a high price for, and sat on the bed, waiting for him to get back from a meeting with some phantom troupe members that were in town.

The wait already had you anxious, but the way he kept going on and on about how perfect he made everything and how much effort he put into this night put a lot of pressure on you to do well.

And that was on purpose. He wanted you to know just how much he had done for you… how much he craved and adored you. With him, you would be endlessly pampered and loved… all you had to do was be a good girl and do as he said.

So by the time he got back, you were already anxiously fidgeting with your lacy black lingerie, biting your lip.

Now… he didn’t want to make you anxious, just a little nervous. He thought it would be cute to see you squeak like a timid little mouse as he took you… he didn’t want you to stiffly lie down and tear up when he unbuttoned his shirt.

And he hadn’t expected you to throw up from the stress of it all.

He felt a bit guilty, you were crying and muttering apologies as he called for room service, trying to clean it up yourself. Had he instilled that much fear in you that you shook in terror at the thought of upsetting you? That’s not what Chrollo wanted… despite his sly and manipulative nature, he wanted you to genuinely love him and see him as someone that protected and took care of you.

So once you calmed down a little, he pulled you in and snuggled you, kissing the top of your head. “I..: apologize. We’ll do this at your pace.”

You couldn’t really break away from his grip… and you didn’t want to anger him, so you let him hold you close and gently rock you.

Feitan

Feitan already is absolute garbage with intimacy, so it’s rare he’ll initiate anything. He’s both insecure and emotionally distant, but also longs for your affection and physical touch.

But he also HATES physical touch… so being his darling is a confusing experience where you’re constantly walking on eggshells.

The rare instances when he tries to be intimate with you, you almost leap with joy. He’s the only other human you have physical contact with, and you’ve almost gone crazy without touch and affection.

He’s very insecure and sensitive to rejection, so when he touches you, even if it’s just subpar, you praise him endlessly with soft whimpers and moans. He’s pretty skilled with his fingers considering he was a virgin before he met you.

So when he’s got his hands on your hips and ready to push his cock into your pretty pussy, instead of the usual happy whines you make… you instead whimper and shy away from him.

He’s tortured many people, so he can recognize the signs of a panic attack easily. You don’t know what came over you, but you just started to break down, crying and rocking yourself.

Feitan froze up, not knowing what to do. He’s not used to comforting others, and he already feels the harsh sting of rejection from your reaction. Was he that bad?

But… he’s able to push that away. He puts a blanket over your naked form and gently rubs your back while looking the other way.

“… don’t have to. Just say when don’t want it.”

And that’s all you get. He doesn’t kiss away your tears or clean you up… but it’s a big step forward. For Feitan, comforting another human being is hard, so the fact he’s trying for you proves that you mean something to him.

[cosmicdream222]

Some of my manifestations from last week (with photos)

Surprise gifts

My bestie A and I regularly update each other with about our daily plan for affirming etc to keep each other accountable. I said I was manifesting VIP treatment, put on some subs and affirmed while I was making breakfast (yes I’m not a morning person and make breakfast at nearly noon 😭)

Not even a half hour later, I received a surprise delivery from Amazon:

My friend L, who lives out of state, sent me food and new bowls for the stray cats I feed, and treats for my cats (Stella & Panini are my cats’ names 😹)

VIP treatment

That evening I worked a brand ambassador gig that I booked only a couple days before. I’ve been avoiding working as much as possible lately lol but this one was nearby and paid well. It happened to be a giveaway event partnering with a local radio station and ended up being fun. One of the radio DJs was there, and me as the sponsor brand representative was given the same level of VIP treatment as the radio DJ! There was an event coordinator who basically did all the work and I just got to stand around looking pretty and getting paid for it. 😭

Gift card

After work I got home and found another package from my friend L with a gift card for me 💕

More cat food

A few days later, my neighbor left a huge box of cat food at my door. My cats are getting more spoiled than me 😂

An air fryer

This one is cool because I specifically wanted to manifest this. I had heard about air fryers for a while now and it seemed like something I would use, but I didn’t really feel the need to buy one. A couple weeks ago I was at Trader Joe’s with my mom and the cashier was saying how much he loooved his air fryer and telling me all the things I could make with it. I decided that moment I would just manifest one eventually, and forgot about it.

So the other day my mom comes to pick me up for a family lunch and she has a huge box in her hands - an air fryer?? She says jokingly “happy birthday” - my birthday isn’t for another 4 months! She said she just felt like I needed one 🤷🏻‍♀️

It’s so cute and I’ve already used it a couple times 💕

Attention from sp

Soo I have this crush-type guy we’ll call D. He’s one of my best friends and we’ve talked nearly every day for 3 years. I can talk to him about anything, including all things supernatural and shifting. We have admitted to having feelings for each other, and even had “online boyfriend” vibes for a while, but we live in different states, and he didn’t want to do long distance. I was sad and anxious about it for a while, but since I found out about loa and shifting, I realized none of it mattered and I could just shift to a reality where we’re together already 😂

Anyway I had become detached and stopped really thinking about him in a romantic way for a while. However, I realized since I basically didn’t care and wasn’t thinking about him, he was becoming distant in response. We hadn’t been really flirty or romantic in a few months, and I hadn’t even talked to him in a week, which was unusual. Although I wasn’t anxious about it or anything, I was still missing talking to one of my best friends. So I just started assuming he would go back to blowing up my phone all day, and I sent him some mental telepathy messages about what I wanted.

Monday morning he messaged me apologizing for being distant. He had been traveling for spring vacation and took a break from his phone. He then basically spent the whole week trying to make up for it, being super attentive, listening to my long ramblings about my void and shifting progress, sending me selfies every day, being more sweet and romantic than he had been in months, and kept telling me how pretty I was 🥰

Losing a follower LOL

This is just a funny one to round out my list. I hadn’t been on tumblr in a bit, and when I went to check my asks, I saw I had 556 followers. I thought “darn I missed the angel number, haha maybe someone will unfollow me so I can get the screenshot.” Not 5 min later when I went to look again, it had happened, and I got the screenshot 😂

(Up to 558 now thank you all 💕)

[persephoneflowerpetals]

Hey!!! I hope you’re doing well :) I feel like you’ve been feeling a bit down recently I dunno I could be wrong and you’re just busy but either way I hope your week starts to get better soon!! I just wanted to drop by and check on you and make sure you’re all okay!! Ik you’re probably busy as hell but keep up the good work!! You’re doing good :D!! I’m proud of you!! <3

Hi! Oh my goodness thank you so much!!! I seriously appreciate you sending this!!! This made me very happy!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

I genuinely didn’t think anyone would notice, but at the same time I haven’t been as active on here as I usually am so I guess it is a little obvious lol. I was honestly thinking about making a post talking about this but yeah. You’re correct on that. I’ve been struggling with my mental health recently, mainly my anxiety.

It’s really weird because I’ve been doing fine life-wise. I mean, we had a tropical storm come in last week, but it didn’t really affect me or my family or anything and it’s long gone now. It’s been pretty sunny recently lol. But like, back in April I was still working in retail and I had that car crash where my car got totaled and I had to look for a new car AND a new job (which worked out in the end because now I have a nice new car and a great job that isn’t as stressful for me), but ever since I woke up from a creepy nightmare last week, I’ve just been really anxious and on edge. I’ve been having trouble sleeping and been having more eventful dreams and occasional nightmares. So I’ve been more tired than usual and feeling off. Idk I guess it subconsciously triggered some hidden pent up anxiety or something. Similar thing happened to me in high school before I was diagnosed with anxiety but it was A LOT worse because I didn’t know why I was feeling the way I did so I had a hard time coping.

Anyways, I was trying to stay offline for a while so I wouldn’t trigger any anxiety because I felt like every little thing would make me anxious. I’ve also felt too anxious and tired and uninspired to write or post, so that’s another reason why I haven’t been active. I’ve just been trying to focus on myself and my life right now, trying to find some help now that I actually have decent insurance lmao and just trying to focus on things that will keep me calm for the time being.

I will say that I’ve been doing a little better. Like yesterday and today I haven’t felt as anxious and I haven’t really had any nightmares. Just eventful dreams lol. I even got the inspiration to work a little bit on the next chapter of ‘Til Death (I’m kinda stuck on writing a scene for it so I’ve had a bit of writers block with that lol) last night so that’s progress I guess lol.

But like I said, I really really appreciate this ask! It means a lot to me that you guys care about me that much ❤️. Hopefully I’ll be back to my normal self soon and I’ll be back to posting my silly Hades and Persephone stuff lol

[captain-mj]

Angels of Digitalism Part 4

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

The rock star au I promised!!

Soap hadn’t felt this nervous since… highschool? Maybe? Roach had such a bright and sweet smile. After a bit of back and forth, Soap decided to let Roach drive him to the restaurant since he had no clue where it was. He didn’t speed nearly as much as he anticipated

Because Roach was trying to not scare Soap away. He was worried if he sped too much it might spook him. Roach waved at the radio and Soap got the message, immediately playing with the channels until he found a soft rock channel that he liked. 

Then, Soap started talking. 

Maybe Roach was just used to Ghost, where even if he was mute, he was still the more talkative. His other friends, Alex, Rudy and Alé, were cool and he loved talking to them, but they never rambled to him either. They politely waited for him to respond and always took his input in to consideration. He loved that about them. 

But something about Soap’s way of talking was just soothing. Roach had never thought he was one for accents, but something about Soap’s voice was so nice. He loved it. 

So he noticed the moment Soap stopped talking. Roach glanced over to see that Soap had turned red. 

“Just hit me you can’t exactly respond… With your hands on the wheel and all… Sorry for rambling.” 

Roach made a face that Soap clearly took as a scolding. He withered even more under his gaze. 

Who hurt this guy? For fuck’s sake.

Roach grabbed Soap’s hand and kissed his knuckles gently. It was really chaste, more of a way of making Soap understand it was fine. He then motioned for him to continue talking. 

Soap slowly started to talk again, glancing over at Roach to see if he suddenly would look uncomfortable or change his mind. When it was clear he wouldn’t, he stopped checking. 

Roach parked the car and opened the door, immediately shivering. Before he could grab one of the extra jackets he kept in the back seat, Soap had put his jacket around him. He went to explain but felt himself trail off. 

Soap had a muscle tee on. A proper, guns out muscle t-shirt. He had a few tattoos and he was so fit. 

Roach’s mouth watered. He loved a muscular man. 

Soap followed him, apparently immune to the cold. His jacket smelled like the cologne and body wash that he wore. It smelled really, really nice. They walked in together and Roach sat at his usual table. 

The place was… honestly a big dinghy. Nothing special. Only a step up from an applebees on the fact that it wasn’t a chain. Dim lighting that was perfect for Ghost when he took his mask off. 

Roach dug his nails into his thighs and tried to not think of his super hot friend that he had serious tension with and instead focus on the super hot coworker he could have some serious tension with. 

Soap was gorgeous. Soft around the edges in all the right places. And he was so nice. 

Roach listened to Soap as he talked about the progress he made with the art. He showed Roach the plans and explained how he wanted to approach it next. 

After a few minutes, Roach gently reached up and covered his mouth. He then typed out “no more work talk on our date, yeah?” and sent it to Soap. 

Soap choked on his drink. “This is a date??”

Roach paused and shrank down immediately. Oh no… Oh this was bad… 

“I’m on a date with you.” Soap repeated, blushing so bright. He smiled again. “Okay! That’s… yeah!” He sounded so excited that Roach relaxed a bit. “Sorry, I misunderstood but I definitely, definitely want to be on a date with you.” 

Roach smiled at him, though he still felt anxious. 

Soap hummed. “What do you want?”

Roach pointed to the items on the menu and when the waitress came, before he could even prep himself to go through the ordeal of ordering, Soap ordered for both of them. Yes, his friends always ordered for him when they were out, but he wasn’t expecting Soap to do so without him even asking. 

It felt nice. Soap smiled at him and Roach kept his phone out so they could talk more. 

“What got you into music?”

Roach started to type out the same answer he gave everyone before pausing, hesitating. The answer was that he always felt a passion for music and when he met Ghost, they seemed to fall into a band together. That Roach had always been the singer and he always had his voice. The story was cute, had merit, no way to be proven wrong and was so untrue it no longer felt funny. 

In reality, Roach never really cared about music. He listened to it, sure, but it was never an interest. And then he joined the band to be close to Simon and Tommy. Tommy left. Then everything happened. 

Roach lost his voice and had to make a vocaloid.

Ghost started wearing a mask everywhere. 

Suddenly they were successful. People loved them. It was odd after so long of having twenty consistent listeners on spotify.

“You don’t have to answer.”

Roach looked at him and shook his head before typing out something a little closer to the truth. “Simon did. He was the guitarist and I was the drummer.”

Soap smiled at him. “Cool. I’m guessing you guys have been playing for a long time yeah?”

“Years. Since high school.”

Soap got a mischievous look on his face. “Oh? How embarrassing are they?”

Roach laughed, softening a little. “Pretty bad. I’ll show you mine if you’ll show me yours.”

“Can do.” Soap smiled. “I’ll get them for you. I’m sure I even have some of my old sketches.”

Roach latched on to that. “Anything embarrassing there?”

“Couple of horribly pretentious drawings but that’s about it. Been doing art a long time.” 

“Looks so effortless when you do it. Must’ve taken you forever to get that skill.”

Soap laughed. “Oh yeah. Way too long in my opinion.”

The food came and Roach observed Soap. He ate like he was starving, finishing his food in about half the time it took Roach to finish his. Roach kept sliding bits of his own food over but Soap kept refusing, even though he looked like he’d pounce on it like a hungry cat. 

Roach imagined Soap’s eyes expanding like a cats until it covered his iris and it made him giggle a little. Just the absurdity of it. Maybe some cat ears. 

Why is that attractive? 

Bad train of thoughts. 

Roach did eventually push the rest of his plate over. “I’m done. Don’t want to deal with a to-go box.” He watched Soap wolf down the rest of the food, somehow still finding time in between bites to speak. Roach could appreciate his tenacity. 

Soap hummed and got out his card to pay. He quickly pushed Soap’s hand to his chest and shook his head, taking out the card. 

“You guys have this giant running bit that you guys are poor?? I’m not going to make you pay for my food if you’re broke.” 

Roach shook his head. While it was true they had the reputation, it’s because they spent the majority of what they made on their shows. Also, they weren’t always popular. RIght now, he definitely had money to spend and he wanted to spend it on Soap. 

“On me.” He slid the card to the table and grabbed Soap’s hands, pretending to trace the lines on his palm when really he was just making sure the cheeky asshole wasn’t going to try to put his card there. 

Soap watched him, tensing a little. He looked weirdly excited. 

Roach grabbed his hand and put it to his cheek, leaning in.

With any luck, he’d be over Ghost and under Soap in no time.

[fruitless-vain]

Ok! to preface this, im not trying to give shepherd guy any slack here and I am 100% on your side here. But do you think maybe this shepherd just has a weird reaction to Sham? Just because it seems like the guy is beginning to lock his flexi and step to the side now.

I just know someone who has a dog who for some reason does NOT like my one dog. She gets along extremely well with my other dog but my younger one she does not vibe with, and my younger one is very submissive and listens to other dogs boundaries extremely well (obvi we don't let them meet anymore)

So maybe this is new behaviour for shepherd guy? I still don't know why the hell he would use a flexi though. I use a flexi for sniffari walks and I absolutely hate using it to walk regularly, you have no control!

Definitely a possibility esp considering this shepherd looks quite young and may potentially be coming in to maturity now where they’ll just kick shit with certain dogs or certain sexes

I will say that this dog has reacted this same way to Yoshi repeatedly in the past. Most of the lunging towards Yoshi has always presented with major prey drive motivation- stalking, low posture, slow pace, sudden silent launch.

Sham on the other hand is most likely triggering because sham makes eye contact when passing dogs. If this is a typical anxious shepherd him holding any eye contact will make the shepherd more uneasy and more likely to launch. Yoshi on the other hand offers me focus when passing dogs so there’s no eye contact there to make the dog uncomfortable. However this dog doesn’t really seem to give any uneasy body language, just immediate lock on, slow walk, squared chest when passing sham. Doesn’t mean that isn’t the cause but it’s certainly not giving off “I’m uncomfortable”

On that note though the shepherd is very much making sham need to watch them, if you watch the video where sham yelps and jolts away it starts with sham trying to avoid eye contact but since the shepherd is locked in staring him down Sham doesn’t have much choice but to return that eye contact and ensure he’s ready to act if the shepherd goes for him. So if this shepherd wants less eye contact he’s not doing himself any favours, sham is actively trying in every dog body language way to make himself less of a problem, avoid eye contact while checking on the shepherd in very short glances to keep himself safe

I will add that this was not initially the case with this dog, when we first crossed paths he would have the dog a full 15ft away from him when passing us. We would pass the dog, it would slow to a stop and just watch or after we passed it would creep across the walkways to scent where we just were. Over the last month is progressed to sudden launching and snapping where the dog would still be majorly far away from the owner at the time. Since that launching became more consistent the owner has finally decided to reel the dog in and lock the flexi.

There don’t seem to be many other mid size or large dogs at that point in the path when we cross eachother so I can’t say for sure if he does this to others but considering this behaviour has built up over time - and Sham by nature is very appeasement oriented- it’s likely not an exclusively Sham problem

Currently just seems like a shepherd with intense prey drive and probably some of that antsy anxiety that riddles the breed (herders gonna herd)

Also the owner still being nice and saying good morning every day also suggests it’s not just us to me, if my dogs reacted to one specific dog I’d behave differently around that one person. Go around them, avoid them, make distance and figure out why they hate this dog, or zoom past trying to keep my dog distracted without acknowledging this person as to reduce triggering stimuli. He also outright stopped walking to chat today which again, not something I’d personally do if my dog hates this one specific person/dog.

If it’s every single dog and you just don’t care then yeah, you’ll be pretty non chalant about it to anyone and downplay the problem behaviour

But alas we may never know, I’m just glad he’s adding more space and being safer about it now

[breaniebree]

SNEAK PEEK!

Chapter 20 -- The One With the Interrogation

When Harry hesitated near the door, McCraight raised an eyebrow.

“Is something the matter?”

“Are you going to clear me to work?”

McCraight gave him a pointed look and gestured to the chair.  “Unless there’s a reason that you think I shouldn’t, I can’t imagine not doing so.  Have a seat, Harry.”

Harry reluctantly moved to the chair to take a seat and crossed his arms in front of his chest.

McCraight stared at him for moment, eyeing his rather negative stance before he spoke.  “I’ve been kept informed on the case by Robards and I understand that you’ve had quite an eventful week.”

“You could say that,” he admitted.

McCraight pursed his lips.  “All right, Harry, why don’t you give me your report of what’s happened?”

Giving it in a report seemed easier and he was grateful to McCraight for opening the door that way.  He started from the meeting with the Arcanums and filled him in on everything that had happened from working with the Department of Mysteries, to partnering with a Reaper, to meeting Sirius and fighting him, to giving him back his soul, and to everything that had happened since.  At one point, he found tears running down his cheeks, but he didn’t stop speaking.  When he finally finished, McCraight gave him a small smile.

“I’m proud of you.”

“What?”  Harry exclaimed, baffled.  “Why?”

“Because you finally let it go,” McCraight said.  “That day in the living room with the two men who raised you, you finally let it all go, Harry.  You let all of your emotions out in one of the healthiest ways possible: Crying; not only talking about it, but really feeling.  Not everyone is capable of doing that and I have to say, the fact that you finally did is a huge accomplishment.  I was beginning to wonder if you were going to crack.”

“Crack?”

“Yes.  Go round the bend.  It’s a lot that you’ve been dealing with.  More than anyone should have to.”

Harry swallowed.  “I feel… better.  I mean, I’m still worried about Zee and terrified that I’m going to lose her, but I feel… I don’t know.  I just feel less stressed over it all.  Having Uncle Sirius back and having him and Uncle Remus by my side is just… I feel lighter.”

“That’s good,” McCraight said.  “It’s a good sign, but it also goes to show that you have a lot of healing left to do.  I hope that now that you’ve finally come down from that mountain you were hiding behind, we can delve deeper into that healing.”

“How do we do that?”  Harry asked.

McCraight smiled.  “We keep talking.  But in the meantime, I see no reason why you can’t keep working.  You’ve a strong mind, Harry, and I personally think that you will benefit from staying busy.  I believe that working the case is the best thing for you.  I think we can both agree that taking away this investigation wouldn’t help you heal, but most likely hinder the progress you’ve already made.  However, I would like to see you every other day for the next little while just to keep checking in.”

“But I can go back to work?”

“Yes,” McCraight said, his lips curving.  “You can go back to work.”

Harry grinned and jumped to his feet.  “Great!  Thank you!”

McCraight chuckled.  “Hold your hippogriffs, we’re not done today just yet.”

Harry bit his lip and sat back down.  “Sorry, I didn’t mean… thank you.”

“I know you’re anxious to get back to the case and start the interrogation of Brambilla and I can’t say I blame you, but there is one thing I would like to tackle with you today if we can.”

Harry only stared at him, not sure what McCraight wanted to focus on.

“I want to talk about the fact that Sirius Black attempted to strangle you.  According the report, you lost consciousness and your heart stopped beating in that moment until he performed a life saving measure on you to bring you back.”

Harry shrugged.  “It was fine.  I mean, it was barely a minute.  It’s not the first time.”

“That is exactly what I want to discuss,” he said.  “Most people cannot claim to have died more than once, Harry.”

He sighed.  “I know it’s not something to talk light about, but to me it’s just… I don’t know, normal?”

“Normal how?”

“I don’t know,” he admitted.  “All my life I’ve been working on trying to stay off of Voldemort’s radar.  I knew he was… hunting me in some capacity and I guess knowing that I was the only known survivor of the killing curse made it easier to believe that I’m invincible in some way.”

“No one is invincible, Harry.  Even Voldemort with all of his attempts at chasing immortality was ultimately killed by your hand.  Death comes for us all one way or another.”

“It’s not that I think I’m invincible, not really,” Harry said, trying to make sense of his thoughts.  “It’s just… I know what’s important and if giving my life to save someone else’s helps…”

McCraight nodded.  “Noble.  It’s one of your strongest characteristics and one of your weakest traits, is it not?”

“Yeah,” he admitted.  

“How many times have you died, Harry?”

Harry frowned.  “Like officially or…?”

McCraight lifted an eyebrow.  “We’ll get back to the fact that that’s even a question.  Let’s talk officially.”

Harry let out a long sigh.  “Well, I guess the first time was when Uncle Sirius figured out how to remove the Horcrux that was stuck in my scar.”

“How did they do that?”

“I went to Greece,” Harry began.  “An old friend of Uncle Sirius’ married this really smart neuro-healer and he studied scans of my brain and figured out how to remove the soul piece.  It was really difficult magic and it took hours.  It was risky, too.  I remember Xander explained it to me.  He said the Horcrux had attached itself to the threads of my brain, like a parasite or something and it was feeding off of me in some way.  It was an extremely difficult procedure as they had to not threaten the Horcrux or cause it to wake up and lash out at them.  They had to slowly unstitch each piece like a knot that had to be untied.”

“You were unconscious?”

“Yeah,” Harry said.  “At first.  The more he worked, I woke up a little, struggled against the hold and well… I don’t remember much, but I started seizing and my heart stopped.  It was only for a minute or something and then I was okay and in a coma for a bit while my body rested from the operation.”

“And how did you feel when you’d come to and realized that you died?”

“Fine,” Harry said.  “Honestly the whole dying thing was barely a blip to me because I was so happy that the Horcrux was gone.  Everyone else was more concerned over my heart stopping than I was.”

“Flippant.”

“Huh?”

“You're rather flippant over your death.”

“I don’t mean to be,” Harry said.  “It’s just that removing the piece of Voldemort that he left in my scar when he murdered my parents was all that mattered to me.  I finally felt… free in a way that I hadn’t realized I wasn’t before.  Uncle Sirius, Uncle Remus, Zee, Tonks, and I… we spoke a lot about it in detail before the procedure.  I knew there was a possibility of me dying and as scared as I was, I knew that another part of Voldemort would be destroyed and that was all that really mattered, you know?  I didn’t want to die, but if I’m honest, I think part of me knew that I wouldn’t.  I just… I knew that my dads would make sure that I came through it, no matter what.  Maybe it’s because I was barely fifteen at the time, I don’t know.  I just… I didn’t really believe I was going to die even if I was terrified I would.  Does that make sense?”

“Yes,” McCraight said.  “You courted death a second time less than a week ago.  You let yourself die with intention in order to track down Sirius Black’s soul.”

“Yes,” Harry said.  “I knew that wasn’t permanent though.  I mean, I knew it wouldn’t be a real death.”

“What do you mean it wasn’t real?  Your heart stopped beating that qualifies as a death, Harry.”

“Well, yeah,” Harry admitted.  “But I knew that I wouldn’t stay dead.  I had people qualified to make sure I didn’t die on standby.”

McCraight pursed his lips.  “But you were aware that there was still a very strong possibility that you couldn’t be brought back once your heart stopped beating?  Just because it was possible didn’t make it a guarantee.”

Harry shrugged.  “I tried to stay positive, ergo, I’d survive.”

“That’s not how it works, Harry.”

“Maybe not.  But it works for me.  I knew that I had to come back with Sirius’ soul and I wasn’t willing to come back without it.  I’m stubborn when I want to be, Auden, and therefore I knew it was going to be all right.”

“And when you did give him back his soul and he had his hands wrapped around your throat?”

Harry hesitated before he spoke.  “I thought he was going to die.  I thought returning him his soul would end his life which meant that he couldn’t hurt me.  When I blacked out, I thought I’d just lost consciousness.  I didn’t know I had actually died until after.  I thought I just stopped breathing for a minute.”

“Not breathing is usually considered a sign of death, Harry.”

“I’m still here,” he said.  “Maybe it’s a state of mind; maybe it is that some part of me does think I’m invincible because I grew up with the ridiculous moniker of The Boy Who Lived.  I don’t honestly know.  What I do know is that I don’t want to die.  I want to live a long life with the woman I love and have a family.  I want my dads to be around as long as I can have them and I want Zee to be there too.  I’m tired of losing people I love just because they love me.”

McCraight nodded.  “And that’s something that I want to talk about next time I see you.  Those you lose aren’t dying because they love you, Harry.  The love they have for you has nothing to do with their own mortality.”

“No,” Harry agreed.  “It just makes their mortality all the more clear.  I’ll see you in two days.”

McCraight called his name when he reached the door.  “Keep your mind clear, Harry.  We have a lot to discuss.”

Harry thanked him again and hurried out of his office feeling a bit more focused, even if a little off after that deep discussion.  Putting it into perspective like that, he realized he had died three times.  Sirius had brought him back at the end bringing it full circle.  Harry had saved Sirius for Sirius to save Harry.  It was oddly poetic in a way.  He shook the thoughts from his mind, remembering the mind healer’s words about keeping his mind clear.  If McCraight had cleared him to work, he wanted a chance to talk to Brambilla and he needed a clear mind to do so.  He needed to know what the hell was going on inside that woman’s head and he needed to know about the spell she used on Zee.  If people who loved him tended to die, he was going to do everything he could to make sure that his mother wasn’t another name on that list.  

After all, if Slughorn and Borage’s calculations were correct, they only had a handful of weeks left before they were out of time.

Harry wasn’t about to let that time run out.

[midknightwritings]

Leo with a Composer!S/O that excitedly rambles about his songs

Synopsis : Leo has been working on a soundtrack for an upcoming TV series and it finally started airing !! Just as he was about to show you what he composed, he finds you excitedly rambling about it while analyzing it musically. He couldn’t help but eavesdrop.

Era : Music !!

Warning/s : Very short mentions of feeling anxious / insecure

Mentioned Character/s : G/N!Reader / Leo

[ F/M ] = Family Member

A/N : I love watching music composers react to soundtracks !! Seeing them freak out and excitedly explain certain techniques is super interesting to me even though I’m not a musician myself hehe~ I was mainly inspired by Alex Moukala Music !! His videos are really cool, you should definitely check him out !!

•❅───✧❅✦❅✧───❅•

It finally happened !! The series Leo composed for finally aired their first episode and he couldn’t wait to show you his masterpieces !! The moment he landed back in Japan, he immediately set his sights on New Dimension in order to find you. He searched high and low for you within the building and was about to give up before he finally noticed you inside one of the rooms on a video call of sorts. Leo guessed it was most likely with your [ F/M ] overseas considering that you two were quite close.

A wide grin appeared on his face but just as he was about to ambush you with a hug, he noticed a familiar scene playing on your screen paired with a very faint melody that escaped your headphones. Usually, he would just ignore this and make his presence known but what you said caught his attention;

“Don’t even get me started with how he used bass trombones here to represent the sheer power of the villain !! It’s such a simple and straightforward technique but it’s done so well especially after the more quiet, atmospheric melody that was playing just moments before~”

God, now Leo’s fighting the urge to tackle you [ affectionately ] but, at the same time, he still wanted to hear what else you had to say. You always told him how much you loved his works and never failed to express how much you thought his techniques were brilliant. Sometimes, you even asked him how he came up with these combinations but he always said that it was natural because “I'm a genius !!”

This was the first time he heard you actually analyzing his works and it piqued his interest. This curiosity got the better of him so he sat on one of the empty chairs in the room and listened. After all, you wouldn't mind right?

Honestly, he was surprised at the fact that you haven’t noticed him yet, but he guessed that it was probably because of your headphones since he learnt, via experience, that they were noise canceling.

A few more minutes passed and Leo couldn’t help but feel extremely giddy and happy. You kept complimenting his soundtrack all the while analyzing and explaining why you found each technique to be fantastic. However, at some point you jumped out of your seat in shock, which caused Leo to jump in his seat in surprise;

“HELLO ?! WHAT IS THIS ?!”

Leo noticed you pausing as a small moment of silence filled the room. This silence started to make Leo feel anxious because he couldn’t see your facial expressions from where he sat.

Did you like it? Did you hate it? Was the song actually bad and not a masterpiece after all? Did you pause it because you couldn't bear to listen to it any longer?

Insecurities slowly started to bubble up inside him as his mind started to fill up with negative thoughts and memories but, before anything could happen, those feelings were quickly washed away when you finally spoke again;

“I actually had to process how amazing that was for a second… The way Leo starts off with a standard chord but breaks away from its expected progression into something more unexpected creates a clash between something heroic and villainous which completely diverts our expectations. You can already tell that this is a grandiose encounter between the main cast and the villain… I LOVE IT SO MUCH YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND-”

Joy, excitement and pure relief engulfed Leo and he couldn’t hold himself back anymore. Leo tackled you into a massive hug, all the while laughing happily as you were caught by surprise by his sudden appearance.

“Wahaha~☆ I never knew you thought about my songs like that! It makes so~ happy~! Ahhh, my heart is bursting with so much love! I love you [ Y/N ] ♪”

[solicelegacy]

WIP-

So im working on this HL fic an its definitely still very much a work in progress but honestly i've been struggling with motivation with it.

The idea behind it is suppose to be a chapter(or maybe a couple chapters) of Amit's future memoir, and it's all about the new F!MC 5th year through his view. I personally haven't seen anyone else do it like this, and it's been on my mind since I first played Hogwarts Legacy.

Im hoping posting just a snip of it will push me into the motivation i need. This is just the potions class part the writing so I hope you all enjoy. I'd love any feedback you can give <3

p.s. Forgive my writing, I literally haven't writen anything in years

--------

The days went on, and I didn’t see much of the new 5th year other than classes. However, the talk about her never seemed to stop. From helping classmates with miscellaneous tasks around Hogwarts, fighting trolls in Hogsmeade to even rumours about the dark wizards called Ashwinders looking for her, she appeared to get more mysterious than ever. While allegedly everyone knew her, nobody seemed to know her. Nobody knew about where she came from before Hogwarts, nothing about her family, no one could even tell you what she liked to eat since she appeared to never be seen in the great hall during designated meal times. The only thing people insisted they knew is she took to spending time with Sebastian or Natsai, but getting information from those two was as impossible as taming a graphorn. I was beginning to assume that having a conversation with her was never going to happen, until that fateful potions class.

I remember this potion class like the day I first discovered my parents' Gobbledegook notes. We were tasked to make the perfect wiggenweld potion. Professor Sharp had called on me to explain why it’s a handy potion to have on hand. A simple question really, a first year should even be able to answer it. However, if you find yourself reading this and don’t know, wiggenweld is used to sterilize and even heal a variety of injuries but not all injuries so don’t rely on it as a cure all. With Professor Sharp's nod of approval and points awarded to the Ravenclaw house for my answer, we began to brew our potions. 

The new 5th year was stationed on the other side of the room, just being in the same room as her was making me anxious. How was I supposed to approach a person who has built such a strong reputation in just the few days they’ve been here? As much as I wanted to ask her every question that I could possibly think of, I decided to observe them between the steps of making my own potion. It was probably the safer option to not get too close to someone who supposedly had ashwinders on their trail. After all, it took almost all summer to convince my parents Hogwarts was safe to attend even if there were rumours about a goblin rebellion happening. 

I’m not really sure what I was expecting when it came to their potion making. After their show in Defence Against the Dark Arts, I was positive there would be a magnificent spectacle awaiting in this class, but there wasn’t. There was no flair when crushing Dittany leaves, no throwing all the ingredients into the cauldron at once, no massive explosion when adding the horklump juice, just normal uneventful potion making. If it weren’t for all the rumours you’d think she was just your normal everyday Hogwarts student. 

Soon enough Professor Sharp got up from his desk to check on each student, making sure they were following instructions carefully. He made his way to the new 5th year first, assuming he was skeptical of them succeeding on making a flawless potion their first try. But as Sharp had approached their station, she had turned to face him holding a perfectly green potion in a vial. With all the commotion of the classroom it was hard to hear what the Professor was saying to her but I managed to makeout something about ‘recent exploits’.  I could only imagine what he was referring to but the rumours don’t make it that hard. She gave Professor Sharp a nod before heading towards his office door only to be stopped by the lively red headed gryffindor, Garreth Weasley. 

It was easy to tell when Garreth was planning to make whatever concoction his mind made up that day. He would have this specific gleam in his eyes, with a mischievous grin to match. When he made that face you knew an explosion of some kind would surely follow. This time they both were closer to me so I could hear them. Garreth double checked to make sure Professor Sharp wasn’t listening before asking her to collect a fwooper feather among the ingredients for her edurus potion she was tasked to make. She seemed hesitant, not wanting to get on Sharps bad side to which I don't blame her for not wanting to cross an ex-auror. However, Garreth persisted to which she reluctantly agreed too. Her expression showed uncertainty compared to Garreth's beaming smile of success as the two parted ways.

Hearing Professor Sharp’s office door close behind me, I returned to finishing up my own potion. The colour finally being the perfect shade of green, I slowly began to pour it in the empty vial. Before turning in my now completed wiggenweld potion, I went over the steps in my notes just to triple check I followed each step correctly. I was so engrossed with my notes I didn’t notice the set of footsteps walking towards my direction. 

“I was impressed you were able to answer Professor Sharp's question about the wiggenweld potion.”  The unfamiliar voice had startled me out of my thoughts and quickly turned around to only be met with a friendly smile and a small wave. It was her. Up close she didn’t appear very intimidating, she just seemed like a normal 5th year as excited to learn as any other of our peers. Her eyes however, seemed to have this fire shining bright with determination. 

I gathered myself quickly to introduce myself so as to not be rude. While I had reservations about her with all the rumours and hobbies she seems to have, she was actually quite pleasant. I took this opportunity to complement her flawless effort on her wiggenweld, she really did seem to have a knack for potion making. My nerves were getting the best of me, I simply kept rambling on but she didn’t seem to mind, smiling and nodding to the almost nonsense spewing out of my mouth. Our conversation wasn’t a long one, we parted ways with the knowledge that we would be sharing Astronomy class together. A class I was always excited to attend.

As she headed in the direction of her potion station she almost seemed to hesitate before heading towards Garreth instead. She appeared to be reluctant to hand over the bright pink fwooper feather to the very eager Weasley who gladly took it from her before she could change her mind. If only she knew what she had got herself into. 

She was in the process of making her edurus potion when the show began. As no surprise to anyone but the new 5th year, Garreth’s concoction started to spark like fireworks before quickly bubbling over, splashing all over himself and neighboring stations. Annoyed groans had come from Sebastain and Natsai who were the unfortunate victims to the putrid concoction. With a clearly frustrated sigh from Sharp and points taken from Gryffindor he had called for whoever Weasleys accomplice was to answer to him as well, looking towards the new 5th year who was bottling up her potion doing everything to avoid Professor Sharp's piercing gaze. 

When she finally couldn't avoid his gaze forever, she made her way towards his desk in the front of the room. I couldn’t tell if Sharp was more annoyed or disappointed in how she chose to spend her class time. Usually actions like this resulted in detention or house points taken away at the very least, not this time. Maybe because it was her first offence with him or maybe it was because she gave a genuine apology about her actions, who knows. Professor Sharp seemed to be just as impressed with her work as everyone else was. With a final warning to her about ‘not a potions master quite yet,’ he dismissed the rest of class. Almost instantly she turned on her heels to apologize to her unfortunate foul smelling friends for the mess she caused them before bolting out the door claiming she had somewhere to be. 

[flowerslut]

Popped on to wish you a speedy and healthy recovery from your procedures 🖤

Also, thank you for updating Roots, and I hope it’s because you wanted to and not because you felt you had to. Please put yourself first right now 🖤

But since you updated…I wanted to say on first read this is my instinctive raw gut reaction without analysis…I was loving you having Jasper come back to himself so much…when he first recognises Edward, then when he sees Emmett - the burst of rage and regret and guilt he has! Remembering Alice, running to check on her… until a certain someone snapped him back into his automatic response and the thought he had….makes me feel sick. But I know he wouldn’t do that to Alice, and you mentioned something in your tags about infidelity not being a tag..

(I also hope Alice didn’t see that particular vision with her fragile state right now, would not be helpful for her)

I’m really hoping you let him come back to himself soon and see Alice even though it’ll rip our poor troubled Jasper’s heart out at seeing her like that/knowing what was done to her 💔

My heart is breaking for Rosalie!

And being the Peter/(Charlotte RIP) stan I am, I kind of lowkey love the fact he was stinking of venom and rot because that screams to me that he carried and held Alice all the way back home and we love that for his character 🖤

tldr; take care of yourself and Roots is better than the entire plot of The Twilight Saga altogether, sending positive vibes and all the Jalice love 🖤

Clara x

(PS, I may be back with a more in depth analysis once I’ve reread this chapter after some sleep after a 12 hour working day)

thank you so much!!!! I'm feeling better every day and I'm in good spirits so that's a huge plus!! and omfg lmfaooo don't worry!! every single time I've worked hard to squeeze in a roots update is because I'm fucking feral about this story and I LOVE thinking about it and posting it and talking about it etc etc!! 🥰 for as obsessed with roots as everyone says they are, just know that I'm over here also feeling the same stuff!!! sure there's a sense of obligation there since I like posting regular updates but it's 10000% percent because I love! to write!!! and I love! the fics!! I write!!!!

gonna reply to the rest under a cut bc of spoilers! ♡

don't worry, if jasper's disorientation/current mental state is making you feel sick or nervous or anxious then that means my job here is done 💀 this poor man is still trying to mesh the good (his current life) with the bad (his past life) in his brain and it's causing a full fracture to happen. we (jalice stans) often talk a lot about jasper's trauma because it's a really interesting subject to dive into, but being able to write and explore a traumatized character going through psychosis has always been something I like to explore in fanfic and with characters I like (who are all very traumatized individuals. hm. wonder what that says about me 💀)

anyways you'll have a better idea of what alice is and isn't seeing two chapters from now! but don't worry, I will give you one assurance and say that this past chapter (48) is as disoriented as jasper gets in the fic. he starts clearing up more little by little as the story progresses. unfortunately, I can't say the same about alice

and poor rosalie oh my godddd :( I think that whumping emmett (or renesmee, if we're being real here) is probably the best way to get rosalie to break down. and rosalie is interesting because she's so quick to anger. but when there's no immediate target for that anger, and when the person she loves more than anything is in such a state, you can only imagine what she's going through right now. (which is why edward's current job is keeping rosalie from trying to fight maria because she badly needs something to tear into) you definitely get a little more peter & alice content in the next alice chapter, but not a wild amount. peter's main job right now is 'keep alice alive' and if that means having to begrudgingly follow maria's orders...well, he'll do it, but he won't like it...

thank you again for always being so sweet!! I'm so happy you and other people love this story so much! it feels so good to have a fic that I was insane about for a year straight finally infect my readers in the same way that it did me 💀 I can't wait for you guys to have the full thing by the end of the year!!!!!!! thanks again! ♡

[bratshaws]

goodness gracious 76. brb x oc

THIS FIC IS 18+ ONLY! MINORS PLS DNI!

a/n: sometimes I don't call for the smut the smut calls for me uwu

check out the fic's playlist made by the sweet @wiipes !!

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: healthy relationship is based on TALKING, s m u t , god they are so in love i fucking HATE THEM ( jk i love them)

chapters:

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/25/26/27/28/29/30/31/32/33/34/35/36/37/38/39/40/41/42/43/44

45/46/47/48/49/50/51/52/53/54/55/56/57/58/59/60/61/62/63/64

65/66/67/68/69/70/71/72/73/74/75

(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!!)

taglist: @mirandastuckinthe80s @roosterschanelslut @wiipes @lcahwriter @shrimping-for-all @gretagerwigsmuse @frenchtoastix

@lizzie-rdj @fanboyluvr @atarmychick007 @comebacktoearthpls

@peachiicherries @mak-32 @lizziespidiepridie @roosterswifey @ollyoxenfrees @piceous21 @sqrlgrl22 @hofficoffi @lexhalstead3 @lorilane33 @legendarydreamersharkparty @luckyladycreator2 @emilybradshaw @j-6o @louisahale @leobabbyyy @kulicny @winter-run @ktjmac @graciereads

-

Beatrice stood by the sink, waiting for the tub to fill up, in a way that made Rooster stare at her in questioning. Her arms crossed over her chest and her body almost curled in a way it’d hide most of herself, one leg partially tilted over the other as she leaned on the floating counters. He didn’t know what was going on, but it reminded him painfully of their first time together.

He curses internally, thinking that if his attitude was enough for her to feel so uncomfortable to that point he probably hurt her more than she let on. When the tub is filled and already smelling really good, he turns to Beatrice whose eyes never leave the water’s surface, “Baby, do you want me to get in first?” green irises rose up to meet him, but she nodded with a small smile. No vocal response, that was getting worrisome. 

Beatrice’s form doesn’t change position once he’s in the water, her eyes now staring at nothing to the side and her arms even tighter around herself. “Baby.” he calls, gently, almost as if he’s trying to pry her off those dangerous thoughts he was sure were running in her head, “Aren’t you coming in?” he should prepare himself if she suddenly changed her mind, he wouldn’t like it, but he’d respect it no matter what.

The relieved sigh that left his lips however couldn’t be stopped, seeing she slowly started removing her own clothes - a bit too quickly, almost as if she wanted it to get over with - and he had almost no time to admire her body like he usually did before she got into the water…on the complete opposite side of the tub. He inhaled shakily, fear climbing up his spine like an angry spider ready to bite. “Bea.” he calls again, softly, making her worried eyes turn over to him, “Baby, come here.”

Her body moves as if she wants to, but something holds her back, her lower lip disappearing inside her mouth as she chews it anxiously, “I…” she didn’t feel pretty, or sexy that day. The words that woman tossed her way still haunted her hours later. Rebound. Tubby. Rebound. She knew it wasn’t true, she knew Rooster, but the doubtful anxious part of her brain couldn’t understand that at all. 

“I’m sorry for what happened, I–”

“It’s not you, Roos.” she cuts him off gently, rubbing her wet arms with both hands, looking to the side, “It’s just my brain is not helping me.” she whispers the last part, lowering her lids almost as if she’s ashamed of admitting it. She’s made so much progress and all it was needed was some random weird woman show up and make her doubt everything she ever worked so hard for.

And her boyfriend, while not fully aware of the whole reason, was already taking it on himself to make her feel better, “C’mere gorgeous.” he tries again and this time Beatrice does scoot closer, lying sideways on his chest with her arms still close to her body and her cheek on top of his warm pectoral. Bradley sighs gently, lowering his mouth to her head to kiss her scalp as his own arms wrapped around her, like a protective shield, “Your head can be very wrong a lot of times. Whatever it’s telling you, it’s not true.”

Beatrice just hums a weak reply, her eyes focused on the water ripples around his bent legs and her arms, “Do you want to share it with me? You don’t have to hold it in.” he questions, his mouth still on her scalp. She doesn’t reply, nor shakes her head negatively so he has to pull back to look down at her. Beatrice drags her big green eyes up to his face, her lower lip jutted just a bit,  but her face still had the same worried mask on.

He inhales, bringing her higher against his chest so her face is on the crook of his neck. Bradley then kisses the side of her face,rubbing his thumb on the outside of her wet arm while his other arm is wrapped around her waist, “I don’t know…how to explain.” she finally whispered, which was more than she said hours ago.

“I’m not in a hurry to go anywhere, so,” he whispers, kissing her temple this time, “Take your time.”

Beatrice’s back expanded with a deep breath she took in, for courage no doubt, the warm breathing hitting his neck when she exhaled, “...something happened today- I mean yesterday.” she corrected, remembering it was already past midnight, “Someone…um, showed up.” he showed no change in his body, he was still listening, “And she ah…well,” how could she say this and make it make sense? Even if part of her brain was screaming that it wouldn’t work. “She said she knew you.”

That made him still completely, the hold on her body tightening just a bit and Beatrice tilted her head to meet his eyes, seeing they were already looking down at her with a mix of worry and anger swirling in those whisky brown irises, “...and she…well…” she looks away, ashamed once more as she remembers the words she used to her, “She said some things to me.”

“What things?” his tone was hard, but not at her, she could feel it wasn’t directed at her.

“Just…” she didn’t want to repeat it, but she knew she had to so Rooster would know, “...well, she…ah…” it was harder than it looked but she was thankful he wasn’t pressuring her on saying it faster, “She just said you– that you.” do not cry, don’t you dare cry right now. She swallowed the lump in her throat, clenched her eyes to stop the burning of tears, keeping them closed when she tells him everything, “She said she didn’t think you’d be so desperate to be with me and…t-that you needed a rebound because she moved away and–and she called me…names.”

Beatrice feels his arms tightening even more around her, his body now tensing up visibly. She opens her eyes to check his face and she doesn’t think she had ever seen him so distinctly angry, looking like he’d murder anyone within his path. His nostrils flared, his tongue moved inside his mouth as he took in the information, “She saw you?” Beatrice nods, which only appear to make her boyfriend even angrier, “Fuckin’--” he doesn’t finish the sentence, she’s not sure if it’s because he was raised right by his mother and doesn’t usually talk bad on women or because he was too mad to actually finish it. 

“Roos?”

“I can’t fucking believe she went to you, how the fuck did she– I need to talk to Mav about this because she can’t do this shit.” he growls under his breath, the tendon on his jaw popping when he clenches it, “First she tries contacting me, which was already a fucking annoyance but she goes to you?? I’m not going to let her get away with this.”

Beatrice blinks up at him, pushing herself upwards so she’d be face to face with Rooster, “Wait, what? She contacted you?”

“Came out of fucking nowhere, I thought I blocked her on everything but it’s so possible she made a new account.” he groans, he was so angry he was starting to fidget in the bathtub with Beatrice still in his arms, like he was ready to jump out of it and fight someone, “We never had anything! We went out once and she started pulling this bullshit about how we were going to date, asking me about my parents and whatnot…Jesus Christ, this isn’t right– did she hurt you?”

“Well…not physically.” she murmurs, looking down at her hands, “She just,I guess she brought some of my fears back onto the surface, you know? And it…it really sucks.” because now she couldn’t get rid of it, she could not erase them from her mind. Bradley’s expression softened, he was still angry she could feel it in him, but he hugged her close, kissing the top of her head before adjusting her on his lap after lowering his legs.

“You are not a rebound.” he whispers against her hair, inhaling the lavender shampoo with his eyes glaring at the opposite wall, “You are not a replacement for anything, you are you. You are the woman I love and I fell in love with you for who you are. I love you, babe. I do. You are the most beautiful woman in the world.” Beatrice’s cheeks turned red and her eyes shone with tears she didn’t want to shed, “I’m so fucking sorry she showed up like that, I…I really am.”

Beatrice smiles softly, her cheeks flexing enough to force a few tears down, tears that he either kissed away or wiped with his thumb. Her heart fluttered happily, even if her mind still disagreed with his words, she felt more at ease when he said that. She knew she was right deep inside, she knew the goblin voice was wrong - again - and that Chloe was wrong just as much, “I love you too.” she whispers in a shaky voice, sniffling a bit, trying to hold back the other tears that tracked down her cheeks, “It’s not your fault that she…showed up, you know?”

“Still, it was related to me in some way.” he murmurs, murder written all over his face, “She can’t do that, I don’t now if it counts as harassment or something but it’s bullshit.”

“Evelyn was there when she showed up.” Beatrice says,her body slowly easing some of the tension from before, “So…she called her dad and just that was enough to make her scurry away.”

Bradley looked up at her with his eyebrows slightly furrowed, then he thought of her words with his eyes to the side, “Yeah, it’d make sense, Cyclone can have a talk to her new superiors and tell them what happened. It won’t end well for her.” but he was still very annoyed by everything. How the fuck dare she go to Beatrice and tell her she’s a rebound. Rebound?? 

God he was so mad.

But his focus right now would be Beatrice,talking to her and making sure she understands that whatever Chloe told her is not true, “She started saying some stuff about you too.” Beatrice says softly, making circled on his chest with the tip of her index finger, “That…well, she said a lot of dumb stuff and I guess,I got really mad at her. I don’t know, she talked about you like you were…an idiot or something, and it fucked me up really bad.”

He didn’t know why he was surprised, knowing Beatrice, she’d be upset if she hurt her but she’d be downright furious if she messed with someone of her family, her friends but especially him. Even the little knot between her brows showed that she was getting even more upset just talking about it. Bradley’s lips twitched into a smile, his anger dissipating into adoration as he props his chin on her shoulder, “And you defended me.” she nods, without hesitation, “...God I don’t deserve you.”

“That’s not true.” she whispers, “Why would you say that?”

He couldn’t elaborate why, his own demons probably prevented him from forming an eloquent sentence that’d show why he felt that way and she’d still not believe him, “You are just…” he shrugs, not finishing his sentence yet again, but there was no anger in his tone, kissing her cheek soundly with his hands dropping from her body to hold her own, turning her to rest her back on his chest in the process, “Just you.” he interlaces their fingers together from behind her, her hands were so much smaller and softer than his.

Beatrice tilts her head back to look up at him, her pink lips parted showing parts of her white teeth, the movement gave him enough space to lean down and kiss her forehead, then trail kisses until he reached her neck, where he stayed, her soft hair touching his chin and chest, “You know I’m crazy about you, right?” he asks against her skin, making Beatrice nod in front of him, “You know there’s not a single woman in this whole wide world that drives me as insane as you do,right?”

Her smile returns, “In a good way?”

He squints his eyes playfully, “Most of the time, but I do like when you are a bit bad and tries to get something out of me.” he replies, bringing his lips to the curve of her jawline, loving how it made her giggle softly.

“I know Roos.” she whispered, “And while my brain sometimes gets…really bad, I know it’s just because of my own self doubts. I know you love me and I know that sometimes I still get…I know my mind gets the best of me.” he bends his legs up once more, caging her against his chest so he could keep her close, “I don’t doubt you. My brain may sometimes make me think I do, but I really don’t…it’s a bit confusing.”

Bradley chuckles, still kissing her soft skin and sighing against her neck, his body relaxing just having her there. “I know babe,I know.” he he drops one of his hands from her hold to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, rubbing his knuckles on the curve of her jawline, “I know your brain can be a bit of a brat and annoy the hell out of you and there are times it’ll also get the best of you.”

“Yeah…”

“But I’ll be here with you to get rid of those thoughts,” he assures her, her face breaking into a shy smile when she looks his way, “No matter what.”

“Even if it makes no sense?”

“Even if it makes no sense.”

Beatrice’s cheeks reddened, her smile getting even wider before she turns around and wraps her arms around his neck in a hug, their chests touching with the embrace and the water made it a bit hard for them to keep close since they were so slick but they did a good job. With his face buried on the curve of her neck and one of his hands on the back of her head, Rooster’s voice breaks the comfortable silence, “I thought you left.” he says softly, running his fingers through the brown strands, “When I didn’t see you, I thought you went back to your place. I got…I panicked.”

“I’m sorry.” was her reply on his shoulder, her smaller hands cupping her arms to keep herself close to his neck, “I had to use the bathroom and calm myself down a bit, Jojo followed me carrying my bag thinking I needed it and we stayed there for a bit. I honestly didn’t hear you calling me, I’m sorry.”

He hums against her skin, closing his eyes in relief “It’s okay.” he whispers, pulling his head back the same time as she did, her sweet apologetic smile only warming his heart even more, “I forgive you.” she laughs softly at his response, cupping his face with her hands, rubbing his cheekbones fondly before she kisses his lips in a quick peck. “We should wash up.” he comments, while his hands move to her thighs under the warm water, spreading them enough to make her straddle his lap, “But, I’m honestly thinking about something else.”

“Oh?” she asks with her lips hovering over his, “Is that right?” He nods, kissing her once more but this time the kiss was a lot deeper and his huge hands traveled all the way back to her behind where he cupped each cheek with gusto, pressing her front of his and making Beatrice gasp softly into his mouth. Beatrice’s hands traveled all the way up to his sandy brown hair, a groan vibrating his throat at the feeling of her nails touching his scalp, gently tugging the strands.

It doesn’t take too long for Beatrice to feel what he means, quite literally. She adjusts herself on his lap just enough for him to slowly slide in, a whiny sigh going past her lips when he hilts, her arms draped once more around his neck. She breaks the lip lock to look down at him, his eyes partially open as well and his lips red and flushed from kissing, one of his hands going from her buttcheeks to her back then her chest, sighing out when her hips moved slowly on top of him.

“Fuck, you are a fucking vision.” he whispers, watching how her brown hair darkened and glued to her skin because of the water, how her cheeks flushed a darker shade of red, how it traveled all the way down to her chest like a beautiful crimson wave. Beatrice’s only response was a quiet moan, her hips moving in a wave motion, her arms still wrapped around his neck to keep her steady.

The warmth of the water, followed by how warm their own bodies were was actually having a cooling effect on both of them for some reason, he couldn’t understand how since there wasn’t anything in the water that would cause this effect but he wasn’t complaining. Beatrice’s green eyes were now only a ring because of her dilated pupils, her lips parted, shiny and pink, like fresh berries he wanted to bite. 

Neither of them were in a hurry, which considering everything that was spoken about minutes before it could be understandable. It wasn’t only about pleasure, there was reassurance in both of their movements. The unspoken words of ‘I’ll never leave’ were being said by their bodies, the ‘I love you’s’ and ‘I’m sorry’ was more than enough for them. Bradley’s eyes never left her body on top of him, not even looking at her flushed chest but directly on her face. 

Beatrice drops her forehead to his, her arms lowering from his neck so her palms would be on his chest, one of them right atop of his heart. He could endure the worst situations, the most dangerous missions but he could never see himself without her. “Bea.” he calls softly, making her eyes blink open, unfocused but then meeting his, “I love you.”

“I love you too,Brad.” she replies, her voice breaking into a moan at a specific thrust coming from him, her nails digging on his pectorals just enough to make him wince but not enough to make him stop. He just had one of his hands on her ass, the other was on her upper back, fingers tangling with the wet strands of her hair.  

He wanted to tell her, to ask her now, what he wanted to do. He wanted to let her know how much she meant to him, how much he wanted her in his life…but no, not now, not when they were both having sex in a bathtub, she’d think he’s saying it just out of emotion instead of it being thought out completely.

Just a few more days, then her birthday, then the move and then he’d work on it. Right now he should enjoy this. And he was. Beatrice moaned one more time, her hips moving a bit faster to meet his, the water sloshing around them with a few drops of water falling on the tiles. He groans deeply in his chest, with Bea’s lighter one following when both of them decided it wasn’t going to last too long,  the laborious movement was no longer going to be needed right now.

He cups both of his hands on her ass, giving himself some leverage while Beatrice yelped out a moan, holding on the edge of the tub behind him when his hips moved much,much faster than before. Her moaning was broken, chopped murmurs of his name trailed of her lips while her other hand clenched around his shoulder, “God!Brad!!” she whines, pressing her face to the muscle on his neck, trying her best to keep up with him. Beatrice’s whines got louder, her moaning sharper and the water kept on splashing on the floor creating large puddles that undoubtedly would be quite dangerous when they stepped out.

He breathed heavily against her neck, his nails digging on the plush flesh of her buttocks and hips, until neither of them could prevent what happened. Never, in neither of their lives, had they ever felt such a thing before. Never had them ever climaxed with someone else at the same time.

Beatrice’s hips convulsed and her voice cracked, while Bradley’s cursed moan alongside his hips thrusting shallowly onto hers added to the sounds around them. With her hips still moving with aftershocks and Rooster’s doing the same, neither of them acknowledged what just happened until a few minutes after the high had finally passed. Beatrice whined on his neck, hips moving just a bit with him still inside of her before he lifted her head, “Brad?” her boyfriend was breathing heavily, leaning his head back on the edge of the tub and exposing his heavily flushed throat for her eyes.

Bradley’s eyes fluttered closed, still sensitive over the orgasm they both shared and keeping his hands on her lower body, “Fuck, baby…” he mutters, biting back a groan when she moved on top of him “Fuck that was good.”

“It always is.” her reply makes him grin, lifting his head from the edge to meet her eyes, her shining eyes and equally shining smile with her hands cupping his cheeks and bringing their lips together in another slow romantic kiss but lighter than the deeper one from before, “Are you okay?”

“I’m always okay.” he smirks, pecking her lips a few more times, “I think right now, we should finally wash up.” he chuckles against her mouth, making her laugh at the same time, agreeing with him.

-

The pizza was only ordered minutes after they were both done and smelling fresh and clean as he called them. They were both enjoying it on the couch, not so different from that time he was about to go to her aunt’s wedding, watching Rupaul’s Drag Race - season 11 this time - with Jolene chewing on a few doggy treats that Beatrice brought along.

Beatrice couldn’t keep her eyes off of Bradley as he sipped his soda, her legs on his lap and one of his hands rubbing her calf repeatedly. He felt her eyes on him, his lips quirking in a smile with the glass still tilted up, pulling it back to look at her, “What?” he asked gently, loving that she was wearing just her long shirt and comfortable Beetlejuice cotton shorts that showed so much skin.

She hummed, chewing her pizza with the same smile he had on his face,”I’m just thinking,”

“About?”

“Stuff.”

“Ah,” he nods as if he completely understood what she meant, putting his glass on the coffee table so both of his hands are now free, “Of course, stuff. What is this stuff you are thinking about?” she was so happy they were back to normal, especially with her brain being quiet and no longer putting seeds of doubt in her.

Beatrice smiles, licking her fingers clean of any sauce and keeping eye contact when she does so. Bradley’s brown irises dropped to her digits disappearing, one by one, inside her mouth before being popped out with a soft sound, “Just thinking about what’s going to happen when we move in together.” he hums in response, still looking at her mouth and fingers, then moving his eyes back to her own amused gaze, “We could look some stuff up tomorrow and you know, check when it’s available for moving.”

“Yeah,” he agrees with the same smile, “I think it’s fair. I think we can find a good place soon.”

“I can call my cousin Gabriella if you want, she’s a real estate agent.” she suggests, “She helped Leo find his house, so.”

“It doesn’t hurt to try.” he grins, grabbing the plate from her hands so he could crawl on top of her, supporting his weight by her sides, “I know what we can do the moment we move in,” he coos, dropping his lips to the curve of her jaw. Beatrice makes a questioning sound, which makes him reply with, “I think we should christen every room, at least twice.” that makes a laugh break out of her lips, tilting her head back and exposing more of her neck to his lips, “It brings good luck.”

“Uh huh,” she replies clearly not believing him, “And where did you see such a thing?”

“Somewhere, I don’t know.” Another laugh comes from Beatrice at his nonchalant reply, “But I know it’s good.” He kisses her throat a few more times, pulling his head back to look down at her. Her lips still curved into that beautiful smile, her hands coming up to rub his cheeks. His heart thudded wildly just by thinking about it, thinking about their future together, “I can’t wait.”

“Neither can I.” she says, her eyes softening the longer she looked at him, “I’m a bit nervous but..it’s the good type of nerves.” she reassured him immediately when he stilled on top of her, his body relaxing when he sighed out a breath. “Did you tell anyone about it?”

Bradley purses his lips, then tilts his head partially to the side, “I had to tell Mav, he was…really happy.” to put it mildly, he feared he’d give his godfather a heart attack by the way Pete was looking at him all wide eyed and opening and closing his mouth, “I’ll tell the others later.”

Beatrice nods, then pauses,looking to the side, “I think…I told Shells,Penny and Ev…without really noticing.” she whispers, meeting his eyes again, “When uh…Chloe showed up I kind of let it slip, so…I’m surprised Shells hasn’t messaged me yet about it.” but maybe it was better this way, she’d tell her parents last. 

Rooster sat back down on the couch, pulling her alongside him so she could sit on his lap, kissing her temple with his arms wrapping around her waist, “We’ll be fine.” he tells her, but the words held more weight than just about moving in together. It was about everything. It was a promise both of them planned to keep.

‘Yeah.” she whispers back, smiling while looking at the TV, “We will.”

[slayonehundredninetytwo]

Just don’t look down

Request: Alrighty! I’ll try my hand at requesting once more. For this fic, I was hoping for a Minho one again (there a serious lack of fics centred around him, so I’m using this opportunity to make up for it—if you’re okay with writing two Minho ones in a row) with Seungmin and Chan as the caretakers. Since he has a fear of heights, I was thinking the group goes to tree-top-climbing/zip lining, and because it gets progressively higher he isn’t entirely worried until he gets passed the third course. He becomes shaky and has a hard time getting through the obstacles, which have also become harder to surpass—with more gaps in between, smaller walking planks, loose supports, etc—and he’s evidently anxious. The members don’t think much of it because they are all harnessed in, so if he were to fall he would simply dangle in mid air. That being something that could happen, Minho is very scared of slipping, and nearly does so a few times. His fear is escalating to the point where his stomach starts getting affected. No one really checks in with him as he lags further behind (except for the occasional call from whoever is at the head of the group) and soon they’re all out of his sight. Only when he goes down the final zip line (and the highest, longest, fastest by far) and both his feet are on solid ground, does anyone notice. His stomach rebelles and he throws up. Queue both Seungmin and Chan (who were also slower getting through the course) hurrying over in worry. They end up sitting him down, trying to quell his anxiety before a panic attack can start.

Sorry that it’s very long! I just remember doing tree-top-climbing with my hockey team and it was so scary! I was just barely tall enough to go up, and at one point I was walking on tippy-toes trying not to fall. 

Anyway, take as much time as you need! You are seriously amazing ❤️

—————————-

The Stray Kids were riding excitedly to the surprise location that they would be filming an episode of SKZ Code. They had no idea where they were going, but from the little details they had received, it sounded like a fun way to spend the afternoon. As they rode farther on, it started to become a more woodsy scenery, and the members wondered what they could be doing. 

When the car finally stopped, the group looked out the window to see a tree top climbing course.The group was pumped for an afternoon of fun in the trees. Well, most of the group. Lee Know, was feeling quite the opposite. He was terrified of heights. He sat in his seat, where he looked calm at first glance. But inside, he was panicking.

“Minho, you coming or what?”

Hyunjin said from outside the car. He snapped out of his panic induced trance to see that the members had all already made their way out of the vehicle.

“Oh..Yeah- I’m coming.”

He didn’t want to move. He didn’t want to go anywhere near the course. But he forced himself to climb out of his seat and out of the van.

The walked the short distance to the entrance, where a man waited with eight harnesses. He began to explain the safety procedures and rules.He also told them that they would have go pros strapped to them the record their time in the trees. Minho was only half listening. The rest of his mind was worrying about what could go wrong. What if a rope breaks? What if a wood bridge collapses? What if his harness comes off and he’s left free falling into the forest?

Before he knew it, he was being strapped into his harness and hooked to a rope that held him to the course. He was putting his whole life in the hands of some thin rope that would probably snap any moment. 

With that, the members were sent off to complete the course.

He trudged forward taking as tiny steps as he could, before reaching the first “obstacle of the course. It wasn’t much of an obstacle merely a simple bridge to walk across. Easy enough. If he just didn’t look down, he would be fine. Hopefully.

But as he stepped onto the bridge, it shook an swayed and creaked. It was scarier than he expected . He held onto his rope for dear life as he made his way across the wobbling bridge. He sighed a breath of relief when he got across. At this point, all the members were well ahead of him. They were all enjoying themselves as the hung from ropes in the sky. But Minho was definitely not having a good time.

He passed a few more of the “simpler” obstacles before reaching the first zipline. Oh God. He was petrified. He could see some of his members up ahead of him now, and when they noticed his hesitation, they tried to motivate the scared boy. It was a short zip line after all, so they didn’t really understand what was the hold up.

“Come on Minho, you’ve got it. Just don’t look down. It’s over before you know it.”

Someone called from the other side. And after hyperventilating for a minute, he lifted his feet and let himself fly down the zipline, his eyes squeezed shut and his mouth hanging open, screaming the whole time. He landed on the platform on shaky feet. He was dizzy. His feet felt like they would give up and he would pass out, hanging there in the harness. After a minute of trying to collect himself, he pushed forward. He just had to get it over with and get down from there. Just don’t look down.

He ventured forth through the course, until he reached another bridge. But it wasn’t an ordinary bridge. It was split into four sections, and you had to step from square to square to get across. each square would move and sway differently from the next. He couldn’t give up there. He would if her could, but he physically could not get out of the course without crossing the obstacle. So, he held right to his rope and stepped to the first square. It was like standing on a swing. Only it was way up in the sky and if you fall you probably die on impact. 

The swing- I mean “stepping bridge” swayed below him. He stepped his foot to the next wooden square as carefully as he could, and it flew forward with Minho in an awkward straddled position. He realized he definitely couldn’t stay like that for long and quickly stepped his other foot along with it. He still had  more steps to go. As he tried to continue on with the obstacle, he almost fell. It was terrifying. He knew that if he did fall, he’s strapped in, and he would just hang there for a second before continuing the course. He was so scared that he was dizzy, and his stomach feels weird from the sheer amount of fear rushing through his body. Still, he trudged along through the course. Just don’t look down. 

The farther he got, the harder(and scarier) the course got. Wooden steps got smaller. Zip lines were longer. There were less things to grab onto. By the time he was in front of the last part, he was shaking. His stomach still churning and the dizzy feeling still remaining. The only people in sight were Chan and Seungmin, who seemed to be taking a quick breather. Minho looked to see what the last level was. It was a giant zip line. He was petrified to be quite honest. He watched Chan and Seungmin get up to go down the zipline. Seungmin went first. As Minho watched, it only made him even more anxious as Seungmin flew down the zipline, screaming in a way that was more from the thrill, and not fear. Chan went down as well, also zooming down at the speed of light. 

When it came time for Minho to go down, he was close to a panick attack. But he had to get down out of the sky. Just don’t look down.

He stepped up to the zipline, closed his eyes and started flying.(metaphorically obviously)

He screamed, not from thrill but from fear. That’s when made the biggest mistake possible. He looked down. He felt adrenaline pumping through his veins. He was light headed. And his stomach was churning like. crazy. The ride was almost over, and he felt himself starting to cry in terror as tear streamed down his face.

When he finally made it to the landing pad, Seungmin and Chan were waiting for him. 

He stepped onto the hardwood floor, and before his friends could say a thing, he leaned over and let out a stream of vomit.

Once they saw his condition, they rushed over to help their friend. He was pale and shaking.

“Minho, what’s wrong?” Seungmin asked feeling his forehead but not finding much of a temperature. 

But the boy gave no answer. Chan realized what was happening. Minho was having a panic attack. How could Chan be so stupid! He should have stayed with him. He knew about Minho’s fear of heights. He just didn’t know it was this bad. He should have stayed with him. If he had, maybe their friend wouldn’t be standing here, surrounded by fresh air and still unable to catch his breath while standing in front of a puddle of puke. He turned off Minhos camera, along with his own and told Seungmin to do the same. 

“Minho, look at me. Breath in….Breathe out….”

He continued to help Minho to calm down, Seungmin holding onto the boys hand and tracing circles along it. Once he was finally calm, they took him out of his harness and sat him down on a nearby bench. 

“I’m sorry. I should have stayed with you. I knew about your fear. I should have made sure you were okay.” Chan said. He felt so bad. What kind of a leader leaves his friend to do the something that scared him like this all alone.

“It’s okay. You were having fun. I’m glad you got to have a fun day. Sorry I ruined it.”

“You didn’t ruin anything. We ruined it by not being there for you.” Seungmin said.

Minho didn’t know what to say. It’s not like they were wrong. But he accepted their apology. Chan went to talk to the staff about what happened to have it cut from the video and so it would get cleaned up, while 2Min headed back to the car. When the other members found out what happened, they all felt guilty and promised to make it up to him somehow. Minho was just glad to be on solid ground where he could finally breathe again. 

———————-

Sorry this request took me so long! I hope it’s what you wanted.

🫶

[ohkate]

Gallavich

So I’m way tardy to the party, but I recently marathoned Shameless based on some of the ian/mickey gifsets I’ve seen. A few observations:

1. Mickey Milkovich was the best character on that show. I’m a little bit obsessed with him. It DOES NOT COMPUTE why he was so criminally underused. Any amount of money Noel was asking for they should have just thrown at him like a stripper. I didn’t realize what a good actor he was. The scene where he tells Ian, “Don’t” and his voice cracks, the rape his father forced on him, anytime he talked about his family... despite being so tough-guy on the surface, you could tell how much pain he was in at pretty much all times. Seeing him with Ian sometimes trying to hide letting him see the real guy underneath reminded me of when you take an abused dog into a loving home...it just shakes in the corner for a while because it’s scared and doesn’t know how to handle not being abused. Living in that house he grew up in was like living with an open festering wound that got poked regularly.

2. If they didn’t let Ian and Mickey have a happy ending I swear to god I was going to crack a chair across someone’s face. I felt physically anxious about it. I needed it to end well. In that last scene where I thought he forgot their anniversary and he didn’t...I felt this ball of anxiety I’d been holding just expecting the worst finally let go. And the speech about being afraid he wouldn’t be a good father... I just wanted to dig up Terry and resuscitate him just so I could kill him myself and watch him die again. 

3. Cameron Monaghan is sort of disturbing to look at in the best way. In one scene he’ll look like a literal child and the next scene he’s a beefcake and his face looks harsh and squared up. It kind of freaks me out but he’s got a fantastic body. I feel like he grew 3 feet over the course of one season, lol. One of the hottest scenes is when he’s trying to stop Mickey and he just goes into commando mode and clothes lines him in the neck. Sometimes you forget Ian is  Army/Rotc trained and then he does something super hot like that to remind us. Also when he headbutted Terry-- that was just gravy.

4. The final 3 seasons were amazing for them. I loved so much watching their progression. I loved the way Mickey was so hurt about how Ian was acting after the original proposal. Mickey is always so ‘I don’t care’ and this really hurt him. I love how they kept reminding us of Mickey’s true self in these little moments. He plays the stereotypical tough guy so much and then suddenly there’s a moment where he’s clearly affected by something and Ian comes in to just hold him or calm him. 

5. I’m pretty convinced the whole wedding arc was done entirely just to appease the fans because it was so funny seeing Mickey go bridezilla and it was also sweet and yet another reminder of how much more sensitive he is than he ever wanted to show. But with Ian he could. He felt safe enough to. Not always, but a lot. 

6.They really needed to work a bit more on their kissing scenes, lol. Maybe i’ve just been really spoiled by Brian and Justin from QAF as Gale Harold and Randy Harrison’s kissing game goes unmatched to this day. But good lord you can tell these were 2 straight dudes trying to get through it. 

Love the ship and I’ve been watching lots of music vids and I’m really glad I decided to check it out. 

[thewatermelloncat]

Six Weeks and Stuffed Wombats

Week Three

Summary: Three weeks in and they reach another hurdle: they can’t make progress if Rosé is half asleep.

Author’s Note: In all honesty, I’ve mostly moved on from this fandom and I’m finding it really difficult to finish this. That being said I don’t want to leave it incomplete because I really did love this at one point, and it was going to be my favourite thing I would have written. I’ve got a chapter and a half to write, so I might pull something together within the next few months to tie it all off, but we’ll see. 

Warnings: Themes of sexual harassment

Prologue Week One Week Two

The next week when Rosé walks into the room, Tamisha senses immediately that something is off. It’s not a particularly hot day but it’s not all that cold either. Certainly not cold enough to justify Rosé wearing a sweatshirt beneath her jacket and still seeming to shiver with heavy lines beneath her eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Tamisha asks worriedly after Rosé had only given her the slightest hint of a smile in greeting.

“Tired” is all she says to explain, her voice scratchy and faint.

“And that’s all?” Tamisha checks.

“Hmm” Rosé hums and blinks slowly.

“Up late for an assignment hand in or…” Tamisha trails off for Rosé to fill in the answer.

“Just couldn’t sleep.”

“Bad dreams again?”

Rosé nods, running a hand lazily down her face.

“How many?” Tamisha asks, picking up her notebook from the table between them.

“Just one” Rosé answers, her eyes barely staying off the floor long enough to look at her. “Then I couldn’t get back to sleep so… I just didn’t.”

“Did you write it down in your journal?”

Rosé shakes her head. “I don’t want you to know.”

“Rosé, I don’t judge you for anything” Tamisha promises. “Don’t you think it would help you if you shared it with someone else?”

After a few seconds and a few more slow blinks, Rosé nods. “It was about the family friend I told you about last week. He was staying over last night and…” Rosé trails off getting distracted before she regains focus. “I was in my bed, like usual, and I couldn’t move again…”

“Do you need a minute?” Tamisha offers kindly after she had trailed off again.

“No, no. It’s okay.” Rosé suddenly blinks and pushes herself up straighter on the couch. Pulling in a deep breath that turns into a yawn which she covers behind an arm. “Sorry… he, um… I had my back to him, and he just stared at me for a while before he moved over to sit on the edge of my bed.

“It was so vivid, like I could actually feel the mattress sink when he sat down, then when his hand started trailing up over the sheets. I woke up before his hand could reach my shoulder, but I couldn’t get back to sleep after that.”

Tamisha hums as she writes a few notes down. “Did you panic at all?”

“Not really. Just like… heart racing” Rosé considers. 

“Did you try any of the breathing exercises from last week?” Tamisha asks.

“I tried for a bit, but they didn’t really work, and I gave up.”

“Could you figure out why that was? Was there some kind of distraction?” Tamisha offers a possible option.

“No, I just… every time I closed my eyes, I saw that same thing over and over again.”

“Too anxious?” Tamisha simplifies.

Rosé hums a confirmation as she leans against the arm of the couch, pinching the bridge of her nose with a faint wince.

“Rosé?” Tamisha worries.

“I’ve just got a bit of a headache” Rosé explains.

“You’re exhausted, aren’t you?”

Rosé hums again, sounding close to a whine.

“Okay” Tamisha says more so to herself as she stands from her chair and moves over to open a cupboard against the wall. “I’m going to let you sleep.”

“No, it’s okay. I can…” Rosé protests before her voice trails off.

“You can barely string a sentence together” Tamisha points out as she pulls a blanket out from the cupboard. “We’re not going to make any progress if you’re only half awake.”

Rosé opens her mouth like she wants to protest again but she can’t think of anything and closes it.

“We’ll reschedule this session. I think I’ve got a free space tomorrow we can move it to” Tamisha says.

“I’m sorry, this is a waste of your time” Rosé says as she’s prompted to lie down across the couch.

“Shh” Tamisha quells as she lays the blanket over her. “I’ll catch up on some paperwork. I’m not wasting any time. Just get some sleep.”

Rosé hums contently, already finding it harder to keep her eyes open.

Tamisha smiles warmly at her before she looks behind her to the stuffed wombat on the table. Then she reaches back to grab it and hands it over to Rosé, who smiles as she pulls it under the blanket with her.

“I’ll wake you up near the end of lunch so you can still get something to eat, okay?” Tamisha tells her.

Rosé nods back, finally letting her eyes slip closed. Soon falling asleep, cradling the stuffed wombat in her arms.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“You still look tired, sweetheart.” Tamisha frowns as Rosé walks in the next day.

“Oh no, I’m fine” Rosé assures as she sits down across from her, seeming at ease. “I just had a really complicated class before this.”

“What were you learning?” Tamisha inquires.

Rosé can’t help pulling a face before explaining about a complicated maths formula which somehow converts an equation into a squiggly line graph. “…then we’re supposed to be able to do it back the other way as well, and I just don’t get where I’m ever going to need to use it.”

“I doubt you will. By my age I only need the basic operations” Tamisha says.

“Can I drop out then?” Rosé smirks.

“If you want to talk about what you want to get out of your classes, you’ll have to schedule a different kind of appointment with me” Tamisha teases and Rosé scoffs a soft laugh before the subject is changed. “I have an exercise planned for today, but I want to ask you some questions first.”

Rosé hums for her to continue.

“From reading through your dream journal, a lot of it seems to centre around some sort of intimidation. Have you experienced situations in relation to that?”

“My dad doesn’t handle anger well. I just have to be careful with him sometimes” Rosé mentions.

“And what does he do that makes you intimidated by him?” Tamisha prompts.

“He just yells and becomes unreasonable.” Rosé shrugs. “It’s hard to calm him down when he doesn’t listen.”

“Anything more?” Tamisha asks.

Rosé shakes her head, and she gets the sense that Tamisha knows she is still withholding things. Though for now she doesn’t push it and moves along.

“There is also a theme of sexualisation” Tamisha adds.

“I think you’d find it hard to find someone my age who hasn’t been” Rosé answers vaguely.

“Can you expand on that?” Tamisha prompts.

“You work here. Surely you’ve heard what guys say about girls every day” Rosé points out. “They start rumours that they had sex with a girl they’ve never talked to in the parking lot. Some of us get smacked on the ass by boys thinking it’s just a joke. One time I got catcalled three times by three different groups just walking across the Quad.”

“I do know about that” Tamisha admits solemnly. “But in your journal none of those people are kids, Rosé. They’re all adults - one in particular.”

“Well, I mean, yeah.” Rosé looks away, shifting uncomfortably. “Because I expect it from people my age, because they’re all idiots.”

“Can you tell me more about this family friend?” Tamisha requests, reenforcing the topic change. “Has he done anything towards you?”

Rosé chokes on words in the back of her throat, and she cuts sound off. Reaching forward to pick up the stuffed wombat from the table and holding it for comfort before she tries speaking again. “He makes comments here and there” she says, stroking her thumbs into the toy’s fur.

“Nothing more?” Tamisha prompts gently.

“He tries to hold my hand sometimes… but it’s the way he stares at me when he thinks I’m not looking.”

“Has he ever tried to enact anything more provocative with you?” Tamisha words carefully.

“If we sit beside each other he’ll put his hand on my leg, but nothing more than that.”

“Rosé, if something more has happened, know that it’s not your fault—”

“No, no, it’s fine. He hasn’t done anything else. I promise” Rosé speaks honestly. “It’s just…” she trails off, looking up and taking a deep breath before blinking a few times. “It just feels like I’m waiting.”

“Waiting for him to do something more?” Tamisha asks.

Rosé nods.

“And that’s why he is on your mind a lot?” Tamisha guesses.

Rosé nods again. “And I can’t sleep when he’s around. Because what if that is the night?” She swallows deeply, fighting against her voice choking up. “Sometimes, when I wake up, I think that maybe it really happened and that was it. I don’t have to wait anymore.”

Tamisha hums and offers Rosé a sad smile before seeming to stall the conversation. Frowning down at her page and leaving them in silence for a few seconds until she speaks again. “Sweetheart, I’m so sorry to have to ask you this” she begins, “but does some part of you want it to happen? So that waiting feeling can be over.”

Rosé shakes her head. “I just want to stop thinking about it.”

“Okay, let’s talk through it and see if we can help you with that” Tamisha introduces. “Do you find yourself most anxious about nightmares when you are in them or afterward?”

“Afterward” Rosé answers.

“And why is that?”

“It’s just… they’re basically a bunch of what if situations really” Rosé considers. “Some of them are farfetched, but the worst ones are grounded in some kind of realism.”

“So, you’re scared that those same things could happen to you?”

Rosé nods.

“But the variables are different aren’t they?” Tamisha raises. “You’ve said before that in your dreams you can’t move, but you can move while you’re awake, can’t you?”

Rosé nods.

“Can you speak in your dreams?”

“I don’t know. I just kind of figured that no one would hear me.”

“But people would hear you in the real world, wouldn’t they?”

“I guess” Rosé answers although she knows that it is dependent on whether people would listen.

“Do you see what I’m getting at?” Tamisha asks and Rosé nods. “You’re more capable and rational when you are awake. Try to use those skills to rewrite the events of your dreams and they shouldn’t worry you as much.”

“Like invalidate them?” Rosé checks.

“Exactly.” Tamisha smiles at her. “And then over time, hopefully you’ll sleep better.”

[nitros-oxide]

Diaries from the Ship’s Depths

(( Alright, if you will indulge me for a little. Oxide being a parent is something that matters to me a lot, and I will perish on the hill that he takes it very seriously. So I wanted to write this one thing, focusing on various inner dialogues of him. Fun fact I wrote the first few paragraphs out and then accidentally went back a page and lost it, so I had to rewrite it. But I’m inspired, so I did this in one night. Enjoy. ))

Nitros Oxide's vessel. For years, he spent with it acting as his living space, as he gradually progressed with his life's path. Even when he made trips to Gasmoxia, he still found comfort in huddling all his family into one ship to drive across the cosmos. Truly, the royal vessel had to have many stories hidden on it, right? A bold leap to make, but it was Nitros Oxide - he was the type to mutter to himself about minor annoyances, his perfectionism was like no other, he definitely recorded every little thought.

Sure, this ship was likely to be used in his command for centuries onwards from this very point, but was it a possibility someone would just go looking for the many diary entries left by the monarch? Yes. It had to be ripe with dynasty secrets, his deep history and issues he needed to have checked out, but most of all... details to embarrass him with.

That's what a figure with a sharp, segmented hand thought as they reached towards the dashboard of the whole ship. They would save informing him of possibly removing all his diary logs for later, it was a miracle that for each bit of fine-tuning of his ship, he hadn't realized that. Only he would not consider that, they mused. Still, they came here for a certain subject matter that only the ship happened to document, that they could realistically obtain.

With the click of many buttons, they came across a specific date they were looking for. Conveniently, it was video and audio, giving the full experience. In the display, Oxide, while not looking any younger, appeared extremely fatigued. He was surrounded in cups of coffee, all throughout the cockpit, the eyes under his bags rather heavy. Besides for the addition of energy drinks, there was another object resting on top some buttons; a dark green egg.

"Diary entry number... oh good Smog who knows what number it is now. I should probably give these their own designation, I'll probably remember it better. Spawn Log 1. Hm. I don't really like the sound of it, but it works for now, not like anyone will know I've been living off of caffeine and adrenaline.

I had just returned from my home world, commencing what really some might think is foolish, but what else could I do? I'm not going to announce my return to Gasmoxia to an unwelcome public, not now... But I had to do this. My racing career will be taking a long pause, while I work on what I could do to be the best again... however, I put this off way too long. The future of Gasmoxia needed to happen, even if with my circumstances, I had to sneak on Gasmoxia to do that.

At least that shows initiative! Spoiled emperor Velo doesn't have to worry about all of this, but now I can say I had my heir before him, he won't step up to parenthood, let alone sneaking into the most guarded place on the planet to lay an egg. Heheheh... At least my spite towards him still makes me happy. Now I have to figure out what I'm going to do. End recording."

The figure smirked, entertained by it all. Maybe that was the wrong word, it was charming how calm he seemed, however that was mostly because he was tired. But they've seen him far more tired and anxious than that.

They clicked on a button, they needed to see more, their curiosity wasn't satiated yet. The next video featured the cockpit a lot more clean, but Oxide's caffeine addiction was still evident as he was curled up in his chair, holding the egg from the earlier video. It appeared larger, this time around.

"Spawn Log 2. What was I thinking, doing this? I'm living as a runaway on Earth, what kind of effect would that have on my offspring, in all regards! Well. In terms of environment, it hadn't seemed to effect them, which would be more of a concern if the climate were colder. But I'm surrounded in individuals I don't like or trust, on a planet I don't like! It would be far worse if I were somewhere more crowded, it's best I'm on these empty landmasses, but I'm not happy with it.

I can't be anywhere else in the galaxy, either I'm known by the inhabitants, or I'm in a hazard. While Mars is unoccupied, I rather not spend time there after what happened. No one else also has Earth sweets. Sigh. All these things I have to do, simply because I'm not setting foot on Gasmoxia. They don't need to experience my kind of upbringing... even if that means learning about Earth.

I've been just referring to my offspring as just their default pronouns, but they will need a name. Granted, right now they are just bits and pieces all coming together, but they need to hatch with a name. Not like the same incident with My Queen will happen and she names her children Oxide, Dioxide and Oxoide, but the minimal bit of preparation has to be done! ... Something will come to me. End recording."

More. Click. The video featured the main subject of these logs, except his head was turned behind him, staring at the door.

"Spawn Log 3. This will be a much more miniature entry... probably. I haven't really talked to any of the other inhabitants, but somehow, someone knows. It's the oval pink one, N. Trance. Making a joke about the egg being able to detect an egg is beneath me. I clearly forgot I was racing something I couldn't understand that was from a whole other dimension.

I probably wouldn't have known that he knew, but he's been sending me thoughts my way. I noticed it a few days ago, I hear this faint voice saying, "Name them Nitros Sylazide" over and over. I questioned it and I got a reply of "It's a good name!" so I knew it was him! He was still reading my thoughts because when I searched up why he would choose that, I told myself that was ingenious as well as a terrible pun, and he just said "Told ya so". This is what I have to deal with on these islands!

This is why I'm saying this out loud, because if I put it in this recording and not think about it, then he won't know I'm going with it. That's their name, Nitros Sylazide I. ... Curses, I didn't anticipate this feeling. Uh, end recording!"

So, that's how they got their name, the snoopy little nymph thought to themselves. Yeah, surprise, it was Sylazide learning all about this. They were aware of the whole pun with their name, but it wasn't their parent that came up with that. It was all still fascinating though, someone with his hard exterior embrace what he was doing, but only just realize the emotions it came with.

Before they could continue their snooping, they jumped upon hearing a ba-dum-tsh from their phone, giving them the notice of, well, a notification. "HEY PAR'S ALMOST BACK." A message from Iridium read. "thx lil dude" They responded with. Dang, they only likely had room for one more bit of diary entries. Better end it with the obvious last choice, their birthday.

The video displayed the usual sight of Oxide sitting at his cheer, but he was more backed up. He appeared stress, wearing the look of someone who was clearly holding back freaking out, and not hiding that fact well. He held his hands close to him as a small, brown insectoid clung to his leg, resulting in him frequently glancing at them.

"Spawn Log 10. Nitros Sylazide hatched. I... I should be happier. It's not as if I... regret it, it's more... guilt on my end. Let's just go down the list. They hatched missing a hind leg, they must have fused somehow and met inbetween where both hind legs would be. I don't know how that happened, I don't know what to do, is it my fault? Seeing them struggle with walking when they should have been able to just fine immediately... On top of that, they won't let me help them, they bite upon being touched.

At least their teeth and defensive instincts are fine, as well as they have these magnificent wings. But I can't assist them with flying. Perhaps... perhaps I made a mistake, bringing them alive in this environment, when I'm much older, living on my ship. Instead of wiping out stupid Mars, I should have focused on my royal duties."

"Oxy, don't blame yourself! Anything can happen with a child!"

"AH! My Queen, where did you come from?!"

"I've been here this whole time. Must've clicked on the button for answerin' calls on top of your little journals to yourself."

"So... you heard everything?"

"Mmhm! Oxy. It's normal to have anxiety. Parenthood is scary. Especially scary for us because it's practically all on us, genetics, raising, everythin'. It's easy to put that blame on yourself. But focusing on how you prove yourself to everyone, your special interest, your racing doesn't make you any lesser as a parent."

"But what about---"

"The leg? Yeah that happens, it ain't new to our dynasty! And don't blame it on traveling through space, or having to rush out of sneaking out of Gasmoxia. Or your age, you're in your late 600s, that's not bad, plus things work differently for us than they might with others.

"I suppose I can't argue with that."

"If you got any arguments, I'd love to hear it, and talk you out of doubting yourself! Be happy, you're a parent now, and your kid is doin' great otherwise! Look it's even climbing up your body."

"What----"

Oxide quickly turned his focus once more on his new nymph, hatchling Sylazide fluttering their wings before clinging onto his trunk. The present day heir laughed at this, only having heard about this habit of theirs from when they were very young.

"Aw, look at that! See, nothin' to blame yourself for, you are loved by them, no matter what. 'Sides, you only got one to deal with, I had to deal with three, and you and Dioxide were biters."

"My Queen, not now."

"This is just so cute though, I'm getting my phone, I'm making sure my computer records this as well, I need to cherish this memory! You probably should stay still though, you don't wanna scare them."

"Hmph. End recording."

Pleased with all that they saw, Sylazide pressed the right buttons to make sure everything was as they left it. Wait. They got a better idea. With a couple of clicks, a new diary entry began.

"Hey Par, you should try to extract these from the ship. Gotta preserve those memories, you know, in case they get destroyed. End recording."

[pastthebutterflies]

Gosalyn's Super-Awesome-Summer-Fun-Family-Bonding-Day

Check out our zine! Read and/or donate here or check it out on Twitter! This was my first zine and I’m really proud of how it all came together! Be sure to look at every one else’s contributions!

Ao3

Without further ado...

Despite what Darkwing wants to believe, breaking the window was never a conscious decision on Gosalyn’s part. 

The bat? Yes.

The baseball? Also yes.

Finally giving into every chaotic instinct she has ever suppressed and hitting the ball toward the window, leaving behind a pile of glass and a cacophony of honking below as her ball rained unholy terror on innocent bystanders?

Only slightly.

But really, she thinks as Launchpad and Darkwing not-so-subtly argue a room over, this is as much their (his) fault as it was hers. If Darkwing could ease up on his constant paranoia and let her leave the tower for more than an hour at a time- or better yet, unsupervised- Gosalyn may have actually had a place to release the anxious energy that had been building in her stomach since the start of the summer. 

So really, the blame can be split sixty-forty (respectively) between Darkwing and herself (leaving none for Launchpad, who has snuck her out with him from time to time). 

Her feet have practically worn a hole through the tile by the time they both emerge. Not for the first time, she can practically feel the exhaustion radiating off them. Since May and June’s appearance, months ago, everyone has been more on edge than ever, as if they still expect F.O.W.L. agents to rise up from the shadows and wreak more havoc than they already have. 

As a result, Gosalyn has spent her summer thus far with W.A.N.D.A. as her only company, streaming videos the others send as they continue on with their adventures as if nothing had changed. 

The triplets following their mom into a potentially bottomless pit during a camping trip.

Boyd earning yet another Junior Woodchuck badge so efficiently that it put veterans to shame.

Webby bonding with her newfound sisters at the beach, digging up forgotten relics.

Everything kids her age are supposed to be doing. 

Mostly.

Gosalyn groans, stops, and lets herself fall face-first onto the couch.

A small, ugly part of her suggests things would have been better if she had just told Darkwing no when he first offered to let her stay. At least then she could be out in the world doing something useful- like looking for Grandpa, something they had yet to make much progress on. The thought is fleeting and quickly replaced by late nights curled on the too cramped sofa, watching Darkwing Duck reruns after long days of the three of them staring at computer screens until their eyes started to water and still coming up empty-handed.

They were trying, Gosalyn knew that.

But she also knows that she’s a kid and kids aren’t built to spend so long cooped up inside. It isn’t natural, especially when she can practically see the ground baking outside and kids half her age racing around unsupervised.

Though, perhaps just as unnatural, she notes when she finally sits up, is Darkwing- no, he’s definitely Drake right now- is waiting at the end of the couch, watching her with a sheepish expression as Launchpad walks up behind, giving him a pointed look, before sending Gosalyn an overly enthusiastic thumbs-up. 

Drake clears his throat. “It has come to my attention that I may-” Launchpad starts hacking behind him- “I have been a little strict in regards to your safety, recently, and may have had a hand in creating today’s…incident. To make up for it, Launchpad has suggested we-”

“Go out for a super-awesome-summer-fun-family-bonding-day!” Launchpad cuts in. 

He’s practically bouncing beside Drake, energy suddenly rolling off of him in contagious waves.

“A little?” She says after a moment, turning back to Drake. “I fell off a building and handled it just fine, remember?”

“Because I caught you-”

“Ah, ah- semantics. Now, where first?”

As it turns out, putting Launchpad in charge of their ‘super-awesome-summer-fun-family-bonding-day’ (no, he wouldn’t change the name. They tried.) may have been a less than stellar idea. Despite spending most of his time hanging out with children, Launchpad didn’t seem to know many places kids her age actually enjoyed. 

Gosalyn wants to say she isn’t surprised given…literally everything she knows about Launchpad, but after so long with Webby and the boys, she figured he would have known a place or two. 

Instead, Gosalyn finds herself staring down a gleaming sign for the St. Canard Outdoor Museum of Transportation. Beside her, Drake is glancing around like he’s expecting something much cooler to pop out at any moment, while Launchpad is bouncing on the balls of his feet, hands flapping gently at his sides.

She and Drake exchange a quick glance before she shrugs. If Launchpad thinks that this is the best place to spend their day, she’s willing to go with it for now. It isn’t like she has much better to do at the moment. 

The sun beats down on them as they make their way through the turnstile. When they round the corner, the first thing Gosalyn sees is a train engine parked on a single piece of track, stretching halfway down the aisle. Beyond it, she sees more of the same- trains, ships, trucks, all of Launchpad’s wildest dreams all contained in one painstakingly perfect lawn.

Upon spotting the engine, Launchpad turns and spreads his arms wide, a grin splitting his face.

“We’ve got ice cream, we’ve got trains, cars, and most importantly,” he gestures toward a spot in the distance, where Gosalyn could just make out a small crowd beginning to gather. “Surprise entertainment.”

Drake is glancing around, still looking uncertain. “Launchpad? This isn’t quite what I had in-”

Before he can finish, Launchpad slings an arm around Drake’s shoulder and pulls him close. The move is enough to send him sputtering, the remainder of the sentence long gone.

“Shhhh, shh,” he says. “Take it all in, beautiful, isn’t it?”

With that, Launchpad once again takes the lead, guiding them up and down the aisles, pointing out the different sights and rattling off facts about each of them as they go, as if he has been waiting his entire life for a day like this. Which, Gosalyn thinks, maybe he has. Between the constant adventures and mortal peril, she can’t imagine there was much time for typical family bonding with the McDucks. 

She’s actually kind of surprised by how much she enjoys wandering around. Not all of Launchpad’s facts really stick (and the rest will all be forgotten by tomorrow), but his voice is familiar and comforting in a way that convinces Gosalyn to relax despite the sweltering heat and the tension she only now realizes has been building in her shoulders. 

Eventually, they slow to a stop beneath the shadow of a wrecked ship, supposedly recovered just outside the borders of the Bermuda Triangle (“The Queen of the South, Mr. McDuck donated this one himself!”). By now, the three of them are slicked with sweat and even Launchpad has ditched his usual jacket for just his T-shirt. 

Drake slides down against the side of the ship, which Gosalyn is certain is very, very against the rules. She slides down beside him. “As fascinating as this has been, LP,” he says. “What do you say we take a break and cool off?”

Launchpad blinks as if just realizing they had reached the end. Glancing at his watch, he frowns. “Right, cool off. You guys do that. I’m gonna…go this way now, for no particular reason that you totally shouldn’t be wondering about. Ha!”

He takes a step backward, then another, maintaining awkward eye contact with each of them until he’s stumbling around the corner, nearly taking out a corner of the ship as he does so. Gosalyn pretends she doesn’t hear the sound of pounding footsteps against the pavement a moment later.

With that, Drake and Gosalyn are left to sit in uncomfortable silence. Around them, she can hear families passing by, laughing and meandering about as if they have nowhere they’d rather be. 

Lucky ducks.

A cough, followed by several more, all incredibly, stupidly forced. “Right then. Ice cream?”

“Ice cream.”

They order quickly and find a bench where Launchpad will be able to find them before sitting. Her feet are starting to ache from walking all afternoon and one look at Drake reveals the same- slumped shoulders, dangling feet, yet, almost shockingly, a soft smile on his face. He’s gazing off into the distance at some fixed point she can’t see. Something in her stomach twists, and Gosalyn realizes she’s speaking only after she’s started.

“Sorry about your window,” she says in one breath, hugging her arms around her middle. “I really wasn’t trying to destroy your hideout.”

“Destroy my - oh...right.” Drake’s face twists into an expression she doesn’t recognize. Regret, maybe. 

If she squints. 

“Kid, I-” He pauses. Takes a breath. Starts again. “Look, I made a promise that your grandpa is coming home one way or another. But Taurus Bulba is still out there. Villains like Bulba are out there. You and I have both seen what they are capable of. I just want to send you home in one piece. Keeping you home was supposed to keep you safe…I didn’t realize I was just hurting you more.”

Drake sighs heavily, she can practically see the weight settling against him. “I’m so sorry, Gos.”

The feelings starting to pool in Gosalyn’s stomach are enough to make her want to crawl under the bench and never come back out. She knows Drake cares, has since he first invited her to stay. But they never really discussed it, never really put words to the little family the three of them have built. She still resents being held back for so long, but seeing Drake so close to dissolving into a mushy, dorky-looking puddle makes her hold back, just a bit.

“Yeah, well, for what it’s worth, I know you’re trying or whatever. Grandpa would…he’d appreciate it. Except maybe the whole ‘letting me become a vigilante’ thing.” She snorts. “Pretty sure he’s gonna kill you for that one. Wait, does this mean I get to go out on patrols again?” Her crossbow has been gathering dust for way too long at this point.

A stricken look flashes across Drake’s face, that is quickly- and poorly- hidden with a laugh. “Babysteps.”

She jabs her spoon into her ice cream, more than ready to argue her point, when Launchpad approaches, out of breath with a set of tickets in his hand. 

He doubles over, panting. “Go- we gotta-”

Hands wrap around Gosalyn’s middle, hoisting her over Launchpad’s shoulders. Behind them, she hears Drake getting to his feet as well. They’re moving quickly as the sun sets overhead.

In minutes, she’s deposited back on the grass, this time with a clear view of the sky. Around them, other families are beginning to settle in as well. 

Launchpad and Drake settle on each side of her, the tension in their shoulders finally fading completely.

“I was scared we were going to miss it,” Launchpad says, passing the tickets over for her to see.

As she goes to look, a loud boom rattles the sky. When she looks up, it’s half-expecting to see F.O.W.L. or Bulba in a looming ship, ready to ruin her day again. But all she sees are red-purple-gold sparks raining down around them. 

Another boom and the fireworks continue, finally letting her sit back, the fight slowly draining out of her. The crowd around her lets out an awed gasp, followed by the kids in front of her leaping to their feet to get a closer look- as if leaning on their tip toes will get them closer to the sky. A part of her wants to join them, but Launchpad and Drake are warm at her sides; the good kind that almost- almost - tugs at her eyelids.

Babysteps, Drake had told her.

Leaning into his side, Gosalyn thinks she can work with that.

[kulaiyin]

(content: windblume 3.5)

i am completely normal about this event 💥😌💥

long post with reactions/thoughts about the windblume quests! as a certified collei fan, this was a great treat!

COLLEI JUMPSCARE

i love how green everything is in this picture

S... SCREAMS

alright so... i thought this was going to be collei and amber’s first reunion, but it actually makes sense that collei’s already visited mondstadt multiple times before! i’m glad because it really feels like a moment that they should have for themselves, without any nosy watchers

CYNO’S A REAL RIOT?! he’s so funny...

also i’m really glad albedo liked his jokes. tighnari is too much of a wet blanket sometimes 😂 (a comedy dynamic just needs some flabbergasted pushback to feel complete to me...)

THIS MAN SAID THIS UNPROMPTED!!!! ∑( 口 ||

by the way, in the CN voice he said something like “collei arrives” which sounds like “ke lai lai”... he actually made this joke again later in part 2 

i cannot stop screenshotting... gyaaa i love these two being the leads of the event, they’re so sweet and shy!!!! (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)💞

this is just a pokemon double battle

WHAT THE ACTUAL HECK CYNO!!!!!!

this is the start of what i consider my highlight of the event. 

i never realized it, but this is such a natural way for collei’s personality to progress after such a life changing event in mondstadt. of course she won’t feel 100% at ease even beside her savior and role model amber. she’s trying to be like the light that took her out of the darkness, but in the end, it’s still really difficult to crawl out of the dark. 

as a fan of manga collei for over two years, i really appreciate that collei’s past isn’t handwaved. the fact that a game like this is taking care with this mature topic instead of reducing her character for comfort and marketability... i’m really stunned and grateful with the care that the writing team has given collei’s personal struggles. 

we’re presented with the middle of a really beautiful character arc here. collei’s still growing, and that’s ok ♪(´▽｀)

sucrose’s speech here is incredible too, i’m really emotional about it... 

i’m really glad collei has made a friend in sucrose. these two characters are surrounded by people who are “out of reach”, like geniuses or role models. being surrounded by people that you put on a pedestal like that all the time must be tiring... 

i feel like these two can really benefit from each other’s company as equals who struggle in making conversation but in different ways. it’s just so good... 🤧 sucrose, you’re seriously the best.

(sucrose... 🦊, collei... 🐱? CUTE-- 💥)

besides the discussion being relatable, i also feel vulnerable having some of my inner thoughts and anxieties with human interaction relayed on the screen through these two so effectively _(:з)∠)_ i still can’t believe they did this and with such a nice message/learning moment, both for people who struggle and people who want to offer comfort.

... anyway, socially anxious people unite...! someone check on the writers responsible for this scene! it’s too real...

sucrose mailbox... it has her neck bow and the metal bit that’s on her sleeve!

this lore in part 2 really got my eyes opened wide?! so cyno’s adopted dad is professor cyrus... cyno also is possessed by “hermanubis” in a situation almost like collei’s, but he has it under control. that’s quite nuts!

SO COOL...

the hexenzirkel-- (googles) wow, i cannot believe i spelled that right --cutscene was also very interesting. the lore revelations about the new characters... hmm! too much to go over, but personally i’d love to learn more about B. “let me scry!”

also very happy to see albedo as a beby...

sigh... i am not a big fan of alice because of her crimes against hilichurls and i gotta admit, despite it being a lore bomb, i’m kind of sad this event ended on such a random note. i wanted sucrose and collei’s efforts to have a world shattering revelation on their psyche, darn it! (exaggerated)

also maybe i wanted a cutscene dedicated to collei backstory... (/▽＼) but i get it, it would’ve been totally out of place and collei shouldn’t be dominating a mondstadt event haha...

in the end i respect the writing decision, i’m glad everyone there got to witness an old secret that happened many windblumes ago. there’s still something special and thematic about that!

I-I-I-I-I-IS THIS.........!!!? A REFERENCE TO THE SCHOLAR’S BOOKMARK SHE WON IN LUDI HARPASTUM IN THE MANGA (COLLAPSES) 

THIS IS SO WARM! THANK YOU FOR A GREAT WINDBLUME!!!!! the cloud test tube scene was such a cute callback T___T may everyone find happiness!

by the way it’s so funny that you can actually challenge cyno...

IT WAS SO CLOSE, HE’S HARD...

also i full combo’d collei’s beatmap on first try! it was really hard too, i was basically relying on my memory of the song to not fail on the note spam parts `(*>﹏<*)′  i wonder why they got rid of the canorus rank?!

THAT’S RIGHT COLLEI IS A BEAST 💪💪💪💪

here’s to another great flagship event *(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭*