#sorry the sketch is so shit but I made it like 30 mins after finishing the game

[st-hedge]

I just want to post this on its own cuz. I did say I’d struggle with the final boss didn’t I. Hands were sweaty

[boxerharrys]

The New Girl Spencer x F Reader

sorry for any spelling mistakes or punctuations missing! and I'm not the best at writing but I was excited to get this out!

Part 1 ( trying to make this like a real fanfic a true story to it)

Description: you were a somewhat popular YouTuber on your own. you focused on vlogging and funny sketches through out college. you watched Smosh for years admiring their work. but as you join their crew after graduating you start to admire more than their work....

Sunday:

you spent the night finishing editing your vlog of the week and watching Smosh; they seemed to help you cruise through editing. until a newer Smosh video starting to play in the background you heard Ian mentioning how they were open for a new cast member; you stopped in your tracks of what you were doing 'I'm sorry what did he just say' you said in your head rewinding the video. "Since a lot of our members right now are soaring with new projects and opportunities we are open for a new cast member!' Ian said through your laptop. 'no way id get the gig' you thought to yourself, you've dreamed of working for Smosh for years. 'what would happen if I sent in a application... I mean doesn't hurt to try I guess' you said to yourself. you went to the description and clicked the link where applications were going through. Although you didn't have much going on you just finished college and didn't have a big resume but you did have your channel. you filled out all the paper work and sent a link to your channel, like you said not much going on so you don't even get excited. you then continue finishing your editing and schedule it to post for tomorrow at !2pm. you then got into bed with your laptop and continued your mini marathon of Smosh to ease you to sleep.

Friday:

It has almost been two weeks since you entered your application to Smosh obviously not even thinking about it since you doubted anything from the start. Until you were home working on some sketch ideas and you received an email from Smosh… ‘the fuck’ you said to yourself. ‘Probably telling me how they regret to inform me they picked someone else’. You didn’t even look at the email you knew there was no way anything was coming from it. Till you received yet another email this time from ‘selinagarcia@smosh.com' you froze; as you sat there frozen for a good you’d say 5 minutes but it was more like 45 seconds you finally went to open the email.

To: (your email) 

From: selinagarcia@smosh.com

Hello Riley my name is Selina from Smosh! You should’ve got an email from out regular Smosh email congratulating you on an interview with Ian, Anthony and I! Was just reaching out to see when the best time and day would work for you to meet with us! Let me know! Below in the address and times we are open to meeting!

Thanks!

Selina

You felt like you were going to throw up. You had to re-read the email at least 3 more times. ’There’s no way I got an interview’ you said to yourself. But then you said ‘shit I got an interview’ you went to email Selina back and told her a date and time you could meet, ‘how’s Tuesday at 8?’ You emailed back; giving you enough time to mentally prepare and physically prepare for whatever the hell kind of dream you’re in. You then started going through sketches you had and dealt with one you never actually ended up filming for your channel. You had a lot of inspiration from Smosh and their TNTL series so you had a lot of jokes for that situation if you were ever in a predicament that you needed jokes for something like TNTL. You then printed everything out that you needed for your interview since the first initial email said to have those ready when you come. You then received an email back from Selina confirming that day and time was great for everyone. You made the decision to take a bath; you needed to relax your nerves were through the roof. You started the water added some bubbles and went to your kitchen to pour yourself a glass of wine. After your 30 mins bath you went to your room an put Netflix on and went to bed. 

Finally it was Tuesday at 5 in the morning you were making yourself a cup of coffee considering you were so nervous you couldn’t sleep last night. Still chose to be up early enough to shower, pick a good enough outfit to compare to Courtneys awesome fits she usually wears, your make up, and hair. The Smosh office was 25 minutes away from where you live so it was finally time to leave; rushing out the door you did a full 180 remembering your paperwork you needed.

Once you got to the office there was a buzzer at the front door. 

You press the button.

“How can I help you?’ Selina says through the speaker

“Hi its Y/F/N I’m here for an interview” 

“Yay come on in” Selina says as she buzzes you in.

You took the your atmosphere in, not believing what you’re experiencing since Smosh was your childhood and you’ve watched them every year of your life. 

You were then met with a happy lady that you knew was Selina!

“Hi it sonic to meet you I’m Selina! We are so excited to talk with you today! 

She shows you to the conference room passing some of the cast and crew; where you’re met with Ian and Anthony. You’re a great actor so you good with keeping your composure.  

“Hey its nice to meet you” Anthony says smiling 

“Yes we are so excited to pick your brain today” says Ian 

“Well let get this show on the road then I’m excited to pick your brains as well” you say confidently to your inspirations.  

Spencer: 

As he was eating lunch with Courtney, Shayne, Angela and Chanse; he was distracted from the conversation as he saw a beautiful women walk by with Selina. 

“Guys I swear I just saw an angel…” he says getting everyones attention.

“Did you drink too much Kickstart today Spence” says Court laughing.

“Yeah what are you going on about” Chanse says with a questioning look.

“Did you guys hear about anything with hiring a new cast member or do we have some type of brand we are going to work with be cause I just saw Selina walking the most beautiful women to the conference room!” Spencer says to them. 

“No” everyone says in union.

Then I see then And give the most sly look ever 

“ You know the conference room is all glass we could talk a look” she says wiggling her eyebrows. 

“No I’m not getting fired from the dads” says Shayne.

“Im in!” Chanse yells

“Angela I can’t either let me know wtf is going on tho” Spencer says 

He watched Angela make an amused face to Chanse and they get up pretending to be some type of ninjas or spy tiptoeing around us and sining action movie music

“ They are idiots” Spencer says paling his face

They come running back 

“He's not lying she gorgeous; id go straight for her” says Chanse 

“yeah id go gay for her” Angela says 

“Oh my god guy what!” Courtney exclaims.

“What does it look like is going on” Spencer says.

“I don’t know  but they were going over some type of paperwork” Angela says while sitting back down.

“Looks like well have to ask Selina afterwards… we gotta get going its almost call time” Says Shayne. 

Back to Y/N 

So everything looks great Y/N” says Anthony! 

“Thank you” you say as you start to blush.

“So I think we would benefit from you a lot” says Ian 

“Oh wow guys um thank you… I will like to be honest with you now hahaha….. you guys have inspired me so much thought my life and this is crazy that this is even happening and I’m very thankful I really didn’t think anything would come from me applying” you explain. 

“Well I’m glad to know that but its happening and we would love to hire you! So do you have any pitches for us?” Anthony says 

“Actually yes its for TNTL I think you guys should do a nostalgia episode where its nostalgia jokes and skits coming back whether its the same stuff or stuff rebranded I think the fans would love it!” You say geeking out a little.

Ian and Anthony look at each other and smile… “ you know what I really love that idea, Selina can yo see when we can do that and make a call sheet for it” 

“Yes defiantly…. So Y/N think you can start next Wednesday? I can send you everything tonight you’ll have the rest of the week to look over and prepare and we can start with maybe just one call time that day if that sounds good to you?” Selina says smiling

“YES” you exclaim!

“Perfect ill show you out! Unfortunately we can’t introduce you to any of the other cast members because they are filming right now but you can meet some of the crew! I’ll show you around so you’re not too confused next week!” Selina says.

“ Thank you!” You say as standing up. “And thank you so much guys it was pleasure meeting you and I’m excited to start” you say as shaking Ian and Anthony’s hands.

You walk out with Selina and get your tour then head home to start preparing for the best thing that has ever happened to you.

Okay that is all for now let me know if I should continue!

[zippysqrl]

I don’t know what to do with myself.

Sorry, it’s a rather long rant about my current state.

tl;dr: can draw and stuff but can’t make a living from it, can’t get a regular day job because i’m useless, see little point in continuing to draw, want to try other things but the transition is a struggle.

so basically, about this whole being-a-content-creator thing, as many of you are aware I have quite a mixture of skills, I can draw pretty decent stuff, I can colour okay, I can animate relatively well given enough time to refine and perfect movements, I can make simple 3D models in blender, and I can program in a couple different languages, I have learned a lot of little bits and pieces here and there and have a pretty good eye for detail.

But in terms of making a living, earning enough money to live happily, the only thing I've ever really monetised in any way is drawing, and I've known for many years that making a living out of that alone is tough, especially with all the hobbyist artists over-saturating the internet and fandoms, and the endless supply of free/pirated stuff. I enjoy drawing, I want to continue drawing, but I’m too inconsistent and too much of a perfectionist to effectively min-max the drawing process and do it for a living, and I’m clearly not good enough for most people to care about throwing their hard earned money for the luxury of art from yet another artist. Even if I can make some money from drawings, it’s very inconsistent income as it may take me 30 minutes to 1 hour for a sketch one day, and 3 to 6 hours the next, and for more refined pieces... don’t even get me started. Definitely not even close to what a minimum-wage job could provide, and I don’t want to paywall or anything to force people to throw money at me for what might not even meet their expectations.

There are so many people that can draw and do commissions and stuff so much better than I that I question if it’s worth it, if there’s any point continuing to produce content which isn’t as great as what a lot of other artists produce. Even if the content I produce is unique and original, there’s so much new content being produced by so many other good artists that most people wouldn’t notice, they wouldn’t know what they’re missing and therefore would not care. I know there’s a few fans that’d be disappointed, I know how it feels when an artist you like quits, but it’s something you can get over quite easily, and there’s always new artists with amazing styles filling those voids. Art(aka porn) is a leisure after all, and most people can get better content for free. I know there’s always the case of drawing something that hasn’t been drawn before, but again they won’t know they’re missing those things if I don’t make them in the first place, but the same applies to all mediums of content, including those that I could be doing instead.

In the real world, with regular day-jobs involving god-knows what, I’m fucking useless. Not only am I genetically disadvantaged because I’m a scrawny weak fuck with very little fat & muscle (cus of some unidentified genetic disorder that the doctors have taken their sweet-ass time to test me for), I’m also somewhat mentally disadvantaged, I can’t communicate with people as easily as I’d like, I can’t focus my full attention on single tasks because of le-autism, my memory is fucking terrible and I can’t remember a lot of shit or follow instructions unless I write them down, and to top it all off I’ve a phobia of travelling, so I’ve a pretty short straw in terms of employment potential. A while ago I tried going on employment support so I’d get help finding a job I’m physically and mentally able, but their tests are shit and completely disregarded most of what makes me need the help in the first place, so I was deemed “fit for work” and forced onto regular job-seekers shit, which I had tried a few years ago but struggled with and had to quit. After that I tried self-employment with art, which didn’t really work that well, most of the money I made during that time was by other means which i’d rather not mention here. So I’m sorta in the same boat as before, I need to find a way to earn a living online using the skills I have, but i know damn well that drawing alone won’t get me very far, I thought patreon would at least make things a little better, but as I’ve said; I’ve not a large enough following of people that give a shit.

So.. I have those other skills, I can try and make games, that at least reaches a wider audience and would give me some practice so that i might be able to get a real job in game development, which I’ve wanted to do since I was 12(I’m now 22). I’ve got a few ideas for things I could make, before I even got into drawing I was pretty good at programming things that people really liked. Problem is I’m out of practice, It’d take a while to get back into the swing of things, and I’d have to stop (or at least significantly reduce) drawing, as my autistic brain cannot do both programming and drawing in the same day, I have to focus my creative efforts on just one. While there are a lot of programmers in the fandom, there aren’t nearly enough making pony games, I’d like to make mlp-themed games, but realistically I’d aim to make something that I can shove up on steam. So I likely won’t be making any pony porn games.

The biggest pain is that i have a lot of unfinished projects; drawings, animations, comics and stuff, my biggest struggle with transitioning from art to game production is that i want to finish those first, and i always get new ideas for things to draw that it’s an endless cycle of finishing 1 thing and starting 1 or 2 other things. I wish I could just give all my unfinished shit to other people, but nobody would do that for free, and I can’t afford to pay people to draw my ideas, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

If only I invested in bitcoin when I was 15 (like I VERY nearly did), I could be a multimillionaire right now and not have to worry about earning money, I could do whatever I want without a care in the world, I could get my family out of debt, and I could share my riches with tons of artist friends and such so they could also live freely while creating whatever they want, and I could be living with Zajice and friends and going to conventions ;~;

Foresight is a bitch, if only I made that unknowingly-life-changing descision 7 years ago, I wouldn’t be in this position. >:T

Don’t suppose anyone would let me borrow their time machine? or bitcoins.

[justalittlebluetiefling]

Chapter 3: Sometimes I Can’t See Myself

Rating: T Fandom: The 100 Pairing: Bellamy x Clarke Chapter: 3/? Word Count: 1546 Words

Summary: (I suck at summaries) Modern AU set in college. This is the long journey through the lives of the Delinquents told almost entirely through Bellamy and Clarke’s POVs. This is a slow burn. And I mean really slow. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. 

Also on AO3

Chapter 3

Clarke didn’t mind being alone. She really didn’t. It just bothered her that things were so awkward with Octavia, who sort of seemed to be avoiding her. Octavia hadn’t come right out and said anything, but they had been in the dorms for three days and most of the time Octavia was actually in their room, she had headphones in so she could practice the routine the dance team was learning. Clarke actually liked watching her dance, but it seemed like it might be an avoidance tactic.

Clarke wanted to ask Octavia to go to the dining hall with her for dinner so they could get to know each other a little better, but kept losing her nerve. The day before classes started, she actually did not even see Octavia once. So, instead of attempting to socialize, Clarke spent the day prepping for her classes. She was only able to skim the first chapters of her Biology and Chemistry textbooks before she suddenly felt frustrated. Here she was, in college, a totally fresh start, and she couldn’t even get past herself to make friends.

Growing up had been a little tough, even if outsiders might disagree. She never exactly wanted for anything, except maybe more of a variety in friends. All she had since she was a kid was Wells. There were a few kids that Wells was friendly with who had been alright by association and fun to party with, but pity friends were almost worse than no friends at all. Her teachers told her parents that the other kids were just jealous, but Clarke knew it was the fact that her mother was her mother that alienated most of them. And then her father’s death and her falling out with Wells.... But she pushed all of that out of her mind.

Thinking about her father made her need to draw. Before she knew what she was doing, she pulled her art supplies out of the closet and spread a few things out on the floor. She placed her sketchbook, a couple different pencils, an eraser, and some charcoal around her in a semicircle. Her frustration seeped out of her as she sketched. It took a few lines for her to realize that she was drawing a ballerina, but once she knew, it was easy to lose herself in the movements.

 ***

“You draw?”

Clarke dropped the charcoal and a very uncharacteristic squeak popped out of her mouth as she covered it with her hands. “Shit. Sorry. You scared me.”

She pushed herself up on her knees, unaware of when she had moved onto her stomach, and turned to see Octavia sitting in her desk chair. She pointed at the drawing. “That’s really pretty.”

“Thanks.” Clarke felt her cheeks flush at the compliment.

“So, you draw?” She barely waited for Clarke’s nod before she continued. “Is that what you’re here for? You’re not taking any art classes this quarter though, right?”

Clarke adjusted herself to a cross-legged position and shrugged. “My mom kind of freaked when I tried to tell her this is what I want to do.”

“Not proper enough for her?”

Clarke let out a bitter laugh. “I’m pretty jealous that you can just throw yourself into dance.”

“I’m pretty jealous that you can get so distracted by drawing that you don’t even hear me come in.” Octavia smiled. “But really, maybe we should invest in another set of locks so you don’t get kidnapped.”  She stood, the smile still on her face. “I’m sorry for interrupting you.”

“Don’t be.”

“Okay, then I’m not. I’m going to hop in the shower.”

Clarke turned back to her drawing when she heard the water start up. By the time Octavia came out in a tank top and jean shorts, braiding her wet hair over her shoulder, she had finished.

“So, I know this might be kind of weird,” Clarke said as she carefully tore the page from her book, “but I didn’t realize that I was drawing this for you until I was like, halfway done.” Octavia stopped in the middle of grabbing a sweater out of her closet and stared. Clarke couldn’t read her expression, so she just swallowed hard and continued. “Is that weird? I’m sorry. I don’t even know if you took ballet. This is weird. You don’t have to—“

She was cut off by Octavia crossing the small space to give her a hug. Clarke was so caught off guard by the gesture that she barely had time to return the hug before Octavia was taking a step back and carefully taking the drawing out of Clarke’s hand. 

“I love it.” Clarke’s heart constricted when Octavia immediately hung the drawing over her desk and stood back with her hands on her hips, admiring it. “Seriously, you’re fucking talented. Why are you wasting your time with science stuff?”

Clarke shrugged. “My mom, mostly. She said she wouldn’t pay for me to get a degree for something unnecessary.”

“Well, you should ditch it. Me and Bell are using student loans. Neither of us are going to make a ton of money, but we’re going to be happy.”

“It’s not that I don’t like the science stuff, though. I’m good at it. It’s interesting. But, yeah. I don’t know.”

Octavia turned back to her with a grin. “How about you tell me what you don’t know over dinner?” Clarke grinned back and grabbed her purse. “Wait! You kind of need to wash your face first.” Octavia pointed at her mouth.

Clarke touched her jaw and then looked down at her fingers. They were covered in the charcoal that she had just been touching. “Fuck. This always happens.”

Bellamy liked his part-time job. Serving coffee to college students was, as a general rule, one of the easiest things he had ever done. Plus, he got free coffee on shift and a free sandwich on his break. Octavia wasn’t there yet, so he pulled out his phone to be greeted by an almost insane amount of texts.

Octavia 5:17 pm: you’re already working aren’t you? crap 5:18 pm: hey so i finally decided i like my roommate and we’re going to the dining hall together for dinner so my stalking you days are over

Bellamy rolled his eyes and kept reading as he sipped his coffee.

5:29 pm: teeeeeeext me so i don’t feel so bad 5:32 pm: clarke says she’s sorry for stealing me and she wouldn’t have said yes if she knew i had a non-committal dinner date with you 5:55 pm: big brother! 6:06 pm: clarke just had the best idea. she's going to get her mom to buy her another desk

He scoffed, almost choking on his sandwich. All that he’d heard from Octavia was how this girl’s mom went crazy and bought her everything. He didn’t understand how his sister had gone from being unsure about her roommate, to thinking that her roommate had the best idea and it was okay to just have her mom buy more things for the room.

6:08 pm: you're probably getting all sassy-pants about buying stuff. well we need the desk. for space purposes. and we’re going to rearrange the furniture to try to give me more room for practicing dances and no, i do not want your help 6:17 pm: you've got to be on break soon. 6:25 pm: come oooooooooon. tell me we’re brilliant!

Bellamy 6:42 pm: So, Princess gets a new desk and you get… floor space?

Octavia 6:47 pm: hush i want that floor space

Bellamy 6:48 pm: Seems a little uneven, if you ask me.

Octavia 6:48 pm: she likes hiking just like us i didn’t ask you anything why haven’t you liked my picture on facebook???

Bellamy 6:49 pm: Good for her. And because I had 13 texts from my obnoxious little sister when I got on break. I counted.

He sighed and pulled up Facebook on his phone, because she was going to keep harassing him until he did. Sure enough, the top of his newsfeed was littered with Octavia updates.

Octavia Blake and Clarke Griffin are now friends.

Octavia Blake 27 mins My school officially wins the award for best roommate-pairing ever! – with Clarke Griffin

And finally, a picture of his sister and her new roommate. Bellamy couldn’t see much more than her blonde hair, because it looked like she was forcibly squished into Octavia’s selfie. Being the dutiful big brother he was, he clicked the like button on both the picture and the friend announcement and opened the newest text from his sister.

Octavia 6:50 pm: be nice or i won’t let you come with us when we go in a couple weeks 6:56pm: thank you :)

Bellamy 6:58 pm: I don’t want to hike with someone who will just break a nail and slow us down, anyway. And you two sure made it Facebook official fast.

Octavia 7:01 pm: shut up. she says she’ll bring her royal nail file

Bellamy 7:03 pm: What?

Octavia 7:04 pm: if you don’t want my friends to know you’re an ass, don’t be an ass. :p we’re getting ice cream now and then Clarke's going home want me to bring you some or will you be too busy?

Bellamy 7:06 pm: Ugh, just bring it. It should slow down for a bit after 8:30.

[wumbo-boi-blog]

9/13/19

Hello World! It’s been a long ass time, and for that I’m sorry. I fell behind on writing for a few days and then I just kept getting busy so this got put on the back burner, but I’m back! Here’s a (somewhat) brief synopsis of every day since I wrote last...

8/30 - Went over to Parker’s house and drank for the first time! It was ok. His roommate got supper drunk which was amusing. I stayed the night. 

8/31 - There was a home game (1st one of the season) and Parker went to that while I went back to my dorm and listened to the game. I ended up feeling kinda sick and stuff, so I took a nap in the middle of the game lmao. Later Parker’s dad took us out to supper and I had a massive pretzel. Later that night I asked parker to go get me some allergy meds and some ice cream, which he kindly supplied. I then passed out for 12 hrs!

9/1 - Mostly just hung out in my dorm and did a little bit of homework. I called all of my parents and told them about my first week of classes. It was nice to tell them about it.

9/2 - It was labor day so I didn’t have anything to do, and my roommate was still out for the weekend. I did more drawing homework, cleaned up a lil, and went on a nice walk around campus with Parker. I read him some letters I had written for him and we talked a bit about marriage and shit. I gave him a gold turtle pin as a token of my love or whatever. We crossed paths with a fat raccoon and a kid showed us a  ~ magic trick ~ where he split a stick using his forehead. College is wack. All in all a good day. 

9/3,4,5 - I can’t remember much from these days. Mostly just doing class work and shit. I had planned to go home the coming weekend so I was trying to get as much done as possible before I went. I spent a shit ton of time in the studio on Wednesday night and had a great time with the buses (I did not have a great time). I hoped on a bus thinking that it would take me to one of two places close to my dorm, and I’d just get off at whichever stop came first. Neither of them did. I rode the whole route for like 30 min and got off one stop from where I had originally gotten on. I hadn’t eaten supper yet, and it was 9:50. The dining halls close at 10, and I was 10min away from my dorm. I managed to stop by a little shop and get a sandwich 5 min before they closed, and I angrily walked my way home. I sat in the common room, ate my sandwich, and then promptly returned to my room and fell asleep after a shitty 16hr day. Thursday I just spent more time in the studio getting shit done.

9/6 - I didn’t have class until noon so I spent my morning packing and getting laundry done before I went home for the weekend. I tried to get the washers to work but they wouldn’t take cash or debit, so I had to download an app, put a minimum of $10 worth of credits into it, and THEN I could start my laundry. I was going to eat breakfast while my clothes were being washed, but the dining hall closed right when I got there, and I almost had the gate shut on my head. Instead, I went to my room, read the book Parker let me borrow, and had some granola bars. When my laundry was done I went to put it in the dryers, only for the dryers to not fucking work. I drug my still wet clothes up 4 flights of stairs and got to let everything air dry in my room. I went to class, came back, folded as much as I could, ate some shitty dining hall food, folded the rest of my clothes, got my bags, found my car, and headed out. On my way back home I happened across a dinky little town called Stanhope that apparently has ‘watermelon days’ every year in July. I took a bit of a scenic route compared to the interstate and I greatly enjoyed my tiny bit of isolation. I made it home just before 4, talked to my dad for a bit, refueled my car, got groceries, and made it back in time for some pork burgers for supper! Afterwards Chance and I talked about movies and shit for a long as time before we finally picked out a movie for family movie night. We ended up watching Heathers, and after that we all went to bed.

9/7 - The next morning my dad got the whole house donuts, and he and I went to the farmers market to pick up eggs and banana bread. Upon returning home he gave me a whole bunch of art stuff for me to use, and I packed it all into a little leather messenger bag he gave me. So now I have an art bag! I worked briefly on some of my studio homework, and just hung out at home. I watched netflix briefly and cuddled with my cat for a bit, which was nice. A little before 4 my dad and stepmom left for a concert, leaving me alone in the house. At 4 I headed over to my mom’s and talked about college with my stepdad for a bit. Then my mom came down from taking a shower and we talked further about college stuff. After that we went to supper with my grandparent’s in a nearby town. When we returned home I got to pop open my senior yearbook that my mom had picked up for me. It mentioned some of my big accomplishments of the year, and it felt really nice to be recognized for the hard work I did. When I was done I headed to bed.

9/8 - On Sunday morning my family went to our town’s local flight breakfast at the little airport just outside of town. Idk what it is about mass produced pancakes on a supper old griddle, but they SLAP. I got to see some kids I graduated with and some coworkers too. After breakfast I made energy bites for a while, and around mid-afternoon we went to my grandparent’s house. My grandma had made me scotcharoos and rice krispie treats which was really sweet. We got to check out a room in the basement that my grandparents had redone, and it looks pretty good! We also got to look at some old pictures my grandma was going through. After that we all returned upstairs to watch NASCAR and talk about everything under the sun. When suppertime was rolling around, we returned home so my mom could get started on the spaghetti. After supper was done and stuff was being cleaned up, I packed my stuff up and got ready for the 2hr drive back. I listened to the Heathers musical soundtrack and now I can’t stop listening to it. Whoops. When I got back I started the 2 block ‘trek’ back to my room with 2 bags and a heavy laundry basket full of snacks because I ain’t no bitch who takes two trips. I should’ve taken two trips. I had to take a break 3 times before I got to my room. It’s important to note that while I was walking down the hall to my room a guy stopped me and told me to vote for him as treasurer and another guy for hall president (which I did). As I finally made it into my room and set down all of my shit, I realized I couldn’t really move my arms. I ended up asking Parker if he could come help me unpack, which he kindly did, and I repaid him with some energy bites. We sat and talked a little bit about our weekends and the coming weekend, and then we parted ways and went to bed.

9/9 - Waking up for class was a bitch but class was alright when I got there. I didn’t do much other than attempt to catch up on the homework I didn’t do over the weekend for my studio.

9/10 - Tuesday was pretty ehh. I wore a super cute outfit and got complimented on it by a lot of people which was really nice. I would’ve had a supper shitty day without it, and I truly appreciated it. I was freaking out a lil all day because I hadn’t completed a drawing yet that was due the next day, so I spent a few hours working on that. I went to my studio lecture and had a small panic attack and a bit of an identity crisis. I also thought heavily about if I’m actually capable, worthy, and skilled enough to be and do what I want to be. That was fun. I was finally able to calm myself down enough to go eat quick, finish up my drawings, and then go visit Parker. It was really nice to see him again and it really helped just being with him for a lil bit. I returned to my dorm, showered, and went to bed.

9/11 - It was pretty rainy and gross all day, but I luckily missed most of the rain and stuff. My studio took a bit of a toll on me mentally. I guess I hadn’t realized just how stressed I was and that I really wasn’t giving myself a break. For the past week I had been stuck on a ‘if I don’t stop working I’ll die’ kind of mindset. I broke down a little in class which was great. It doesn’t help that it’s my period week either. It was basically just my eyes constantly dripping tears and me being unable to stop it without going somewhere to cry for a bit (which wasn’t an option). This carried on until like the last 10 minutes of my next class (so 1.5 hrs of crying). After class I went to lunch, went back to my dorm to do homework, and went to the College of Design to work on a sketch for like an hour. I couldn’t focus so I said fuck it, went and got myself some half priced sushi from hyvee + some other little things, returned to my dorm, and watched Natural Born Killers. I honestly had a really nice night just sitting for a bit and relaxing briefly. When the movie was over I showered and went to bed.

9/12 - On Thursday I had a plan for the whole day + Friday. I was determined to get everything on my list started at the time I had listed, and finnish everything around the time I wanted to be done with it. I got up and got breakfast at 8:30, had class at 9, lunch at 11, did math homework at 11:30, went to class at noon, did more homework in the CoD, worked on a sketch there, went to my lecture at 3:20, and had a meeting at 4:30. My meeting got over at like 4:50, and I booked it back to my dorm as I could see a storm coming and I didn’t have a rain coat or umbrella. I made it back to my dorm shortly after it had started sprinkling, and had 2 min to spare before the heavens opened up and it POURED. I took a lil shower so I could keep on track with my schedule without getting off track.I went to supper at 6ish, left for the CoD at 6:30, and made it there a little before 7! I had snacks packed for when I would inevitably get hungry, and was fully prepared to finish my first sketchbook assignment. I left the CoD at like 9:30 and returned to my dorm at 10ish. I had another snack and started a book my dad had given me before I went to bed.

9/13 - Today I attempted to wake up at 6:30. This did not work, and so I slept in until 7. I didn’t have a class until noon, but I wanted to spend the morning in the studio. I went to breakfast with a former classmate, and then got to the CoD just after 8am. I spent from 8-12:20 working on sketches and taking little breaks every hour or so. I received an email at like 10am from my math prof. telling us class was canceled, which was fucking stellar. At around 12:50 I met up with my dad to go out and eat sushi. I had a pretty good time talking with him and the food was spectacular as always. After that we took a brief trip to the Earl May across the street before he dropped me off at my dorm. I had hoped to get back to work on studio stuff, but I decided not to since I had already done that all morning. I instead went to the Club Fest thing held in a building near me and I signed up to hear more about a bunch of clubs such as birding, film making, theatre, and even fencing! I’m excited to join a club and actually meet people. After that I went back to my dorm to grab some cash so I could then return to that same building and do a pottery painting workshop! It was Stranger Things themed, and I got to paint a mug with some cute lil shapes on it. I’ll have to wait until next week to see what the finished product looks like, but I’m excited. While I was painting I got to talk to a couple of girls next to me who seemed cool. We didn’t exchange info so I’ll probs sadly never see them again. Oh well. After painting I returned to my dorm again and read a couple books on the outside steps leading into the building. When I felt like I had had enough, I went to supper and had some cereal. I came back to my dorm and listened to music for a little bit and sang to myself and just did fun weird shit that I can’t do when someone else is here. I then showered, and started writing this big ass post! I’ve currently been writing for like 2 hrs, but It’s so worth it. It feels really nice to finally have this crossed off my to do list and to just write about stuff. I really do enjoy writing, and I think I’ve been needing this. I’m kinda figuring out how to balance work with play in a healthy way that works for me, and I think I’ve partially gotten the hang of it. I’m hoping to finish most, if not all of my homework sometime on Sunday so I can give myself time to relax tomorrow. I’m so ready to let loose a little and have some fun. I think everyone else is too lol. It’s like 11:52pm and it seems like everyone in my dorm is still up and doin shit. It’s fine with me though. I’m ready for a batshit crazy gameday. I’ll likely catch y’all up to speed on Sunday. Until then, Bye for now!